Original subtitles

Translated by Marc

If you're not awake yet, you better hurry up.

It's seven forty.

Jo�lle?

Jo�lle?

You're awake?

Time to wake up, breakfast is ready.

Jo�lle, what are you doing?

Jo�lle?

Come on, answer me?

Jo�lle, hurry up or you'll be late.

Jo�lle?

Jo�lle, you gotta get up, you hear me?

Hurry up now.

Yes, I'm coming.

Everything for the Pleasure

Little girl, today is the big day.

You've waited long enough, you've got to get on the ball.

Or rather, get balled.

To still be a virgin at your age, it's practically a crime.

Arras, Northern France.

Forty-eight people were seriously wounded yesterday morning

when an explosion occurred in a bubble gum factory.

The causes of the accident are still unknown.

The police are leading the investigation.

The results of the second round of the elections are now official.

Mr. Patrick de Coninck has been elected for the second time...

Hey, you look like you're still asleep.

I heard things aren't going so well at school.

I'd like you to come home early from now on.

And you should stop going around with Annie Hamel.

I saw her out with another boy yesterday.

That's no way to behave for a young girl.

You're a much nicer girl than her, my little Jo�lle.

If you only knew, dad,

how much your daughter would like to get fucked like Annie.

South America.

The biggest football game in the world took place in Santiago

Fifty-two teams in all. Twenty-six against twenty-six.

Giving a sum total of five hundred and seventy-two players and fifty-two balls.

The game lasted for fifty-four hours.

At the end of the game,

there were only two balls and three players left on the field.

Dummies have been replaced by corpses for the reenactment...

You ran my bath water cold.

On top of that the towels were all wet.

I could catch a cold.

And now I'm late.

Why powdered sugar?

I can't believe it, powdered sugar...

You could have at least bought lump sugar.

You don't have time to go shopping during the day?

What kind of tea is this?

I told you to put three spoons.

Three.

Do you understand what "three spoons" means?

This tea is disgusting.

And every morning it's the same thing.

Every morning!

Darling.

Let's make love before you go.

Are you crazy?

Not before a meeting with Weinstein.

I'm already late.

The little bastard, he forgot it.

Look, darling, it's for you I'm working.

And I have no time now.

Weinstein doesn't allow anyone to be late.

Fuck Weinstein!

And what about me?

Yesterday, you were exhausted because you had a conference

with the general committee.

And this morning it's Weinstein.

Well, sure, Weinstein.

Because without him you wouldn't have a car,

no extensive wardrobe and no Club Med.

So stop making a scene.

I'm leaving. Goodbye, darling.

Goodbye.

The shopping, the dishes, the breakfast. Screw it, I'm twenty-five.

It's time I start enjoying life.

Oh no, not today.

Why shouldn't I cheat on him?

�ric.

That's it, I'm going to reconnect with �ric.

Sweet and tender, �ric. The love of my youth.

Nine thirty-five.

Happy name day to all Annabelle's of France.

- You want me to do it this way? - Yes

Our correspondent in Equatorial Zoriz, Gilbert Kiko�ne,

informs us of an astounding news

that will change the course of paleontology.

Yesterday a young boy of twelve, Fetna Maruba

who was on his way to the local mission was devoured by...

Since then, a state of emergency has been declared...

Get out, you bastard!

Beat it and don't come back!

I'm fed up with your kind.

Well, sure.

But first...

Let's see...

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday.

At two hundred a day, that's one thousand francs.

I can't believe it. You've got some nerve.

Okay, fine.

Here, here, take it.

Money, money, that's all they ever want from me.

I'm not so bad.

Being poor, just for one day.

Finally being...

Finally being loved for myself.

Watch where you're going!

- Do you want something to drink? - Yes.

The time has come.

He's cute.

- Have you ever made love? - No.

He's nice.

Stand up.

Kiss me.

Come on, pull my hair. Pull it hard.

And he's funny, too.

Harder, go on, bite me!

- Is this how it's supposed to be? - Yes.

Good.

Now take off your clothes.

Everything?

Yes, you need some help?

No.

I'm your slave, Jo�lle.

Well, okay.

Say that I'm your slave.

Do I really have to say that?

Yes, that's what you have to say.

You're my slave.

I'm your dog. Repeat it.

You're my dog.

Tell me I must take off my clothes.

Take off your clothes.

Let's start with the belt.

- Here, take this. - What for?

You'll see.

I put myself at your feet, mistress. I'm your dog.

I love you. Insult me!

You're sure that's the way it should be done?

Yes, you have to turn me on before I make love to you.

You can see that I'm not hard.

There must be other ways.

You said you never made love. I'm showing you what to do.

Come on, hit me! Hit me hard!

Kick me, beat me. Do something!

You're crazy, you're crazy. You're totally insane.

You loser, take that, since you like it so much.

There, take that and that.

You moron.

What am I doing here with a creep like you.

You're sick, really sick.

- Take that and that. - More.

You freak, you need a shrink.

Look, I'm hard.

- Take that. - More.

More.

Take that, you jerk.

More, more.

It's ten fifty-seven and you're listening to Radio Flip.

Sweet and tender, �ric. The love of my youth.

The Modern Perversity Theater has just opened its doors

With a new show: The Enchanted Carbuncle.

Directed by Victor Hurgo.

Hello.

The results of the second round of the elections are now official.

Mr. Patrick de Coninck has been elected for the second time...

- Do you want coffee? - Yes, that's a good idea.

You'll find some "Nescaf�" in the kitchen.

Well, okay...

- I'll go and make some then. - Yes.

What a mess this place is.

You think so?

So, what's new with you?

Well, like I told you, married and unhappy.

Everyone warned you.

And you're a dentist.

Not dentist,facial orthopedist.

All right, facial orthopedist. So, how are you?

Busy with my studies.

And having more and more difficulty living as a bachelor.

You remember my little habit?

- That's right, I'd forgotten. - Not me.

Not like that.

Hold the brush at an angle of 45 degrees to the teeth.

Now turn, there. Now down, there, there.

I already told you a hundred times.

Now, go on.

How people can make love without brushing their teeth first?

And that's why I left him.

You'll clean up before you leave. Understood?

You can't be serious!

Take me like this. Yes, come.

Oh yes, that's good.

Your hands.

The bitches won't even do the dishes anymore.

And that's what they call "making love".

They should call it "unmaking love".

Will you stop staring at her! You know very well she's not for you.

You just stay with Josette. She's a good girl.

Taxi!

Taxi.

Where are you going?

- Op�ra. - Op�ra.

Miss, maybe we could share.

Why not?

Cigarette?

- No thanks. - No?

I don't smoke.

Too bad.

- You never smoke? - No, never.

That's so good.

Come on, keep moving.

That's good.

Your cheeks.

It's coming.

That's good.

- That's so good. - I'm coming.

That's good.

It's soft.

It's so soft.

I can't anymore.

I'm exhausted.

Ah yes, that was good.

Sixty francs.

Excuse me, I forgot my wallet.

They're all the same.

- Fifty. - Thanks.

Here you are.

- Goodbye. - Goodbye.

Are you sure your brother will be there?

Yes, I think so.

He's very cute.

I just hope he's normal.

He couldn't be more normal and I've heard he's a good lay.

- Who told you? - Some of his girlfriends.

- Really? - Yeah, yeah.

Thanks.

Don't worry, he'll be here soon.

I'm setting the scene.

- Soft light, you like it? - Yes.

Would you like it if my brother was here instead of me?

Oh yes.

Would you like to be caressed by a men instead of me?

Oh yes.

Do you know what to do to my brother?

No.

I'll show you.

You'll have to caress him.

Like that.

And what will happen next with my brother?

- Can you guess? - No.

He will... He will undress you.

Like that.

- You like it? - Yes.

And you brother?

My brother, what brother? I have no brother.

Well, I'm back where I started.

So I left without cleaning up.

I can't believe I was in love with him.

- I'd like to ask you a question. - Yes?

Are you ready to try something new?

Like what?

- Making love with my husband. - Claude?

Yes, Claude.

He's cute.

I would never have dared to ask you.

- But there is one condition. - What's that?

- I'll be participating, too. - I've never done this before.

Not only will I cheat on him with his best friend

but also with one of his ex-mistresses.

This will be fun.

- So, should I tell him to come? - Now?

Yes.

No, not dentist, facial orthopedist.

I'm going to make coffee.

I've always wondered what your breasts were like.

Let me look at them.

Kiss them.

Suck them.

They taste so good.

They smell good.

Now your ass.

Show me your ass. I'm gonna take care of it.

Don't squeeze your cheeks like a little girl.

Your ass needs some preparation.

I have to feel it.

To caress it.

And to spread it.

Is this going to hurt?

That's good.

Oh yes, your pussy.

What's your pussy look like? Show it to me.

Don't be so modest, spread yourself.

- I'm spreading myself. - Spread yourself wider.

- That's good? - Yes.

I love it.

You turn me on.

Should I take off my clothes?

Look how hard you make me.

Yes.

- What's that? - Never mind.

Take it gently.

Put it in your mouth, come on.

Oh, that's good. Oh, that's good, Martine.

Oh, baby.

Your tongue on my penis.

All around it.

On the head.

Keep going.

Oh Martine, that's good.

Yes, go on, yes, that's it. Very good.

That's good.

You're wet.

Come on, faster.

Hello, is that you, Fran�ois?

It's Claude. Listen, pal, can you come quick?

There is a bitch in heat here, you have no idea.

Call Fernando.

Hello.

It's going to be good.

Wait a minute!

I'm not fucking everybody in Paris.

Is that slut still in there?

Come on, we're gonna have a good time.

- How much do I owe you? - Eight hundred francs.

I'm sorry, ma'am, but we don't accept checks.

- You don't? - No checks at all.

I'm only a saleswoman under manager's orders.

- Would you accept a credit card? - No, ma'am.

I'm really sorry, but it's not my fault.

You really can't?

No, ma'am, we don't accept checks or credit cards.

Well, too bad, I really don't know what to do.

If you would...

Permit me to offer you these trinkets.

As an homage to your beauty.

Well, it's very nice of you, but...

Please.

At last, a gentleman.

Well, alright then.

Thank you.

Thank you, sir.

At last, a man who doesn't care about my wealth.

Who desires me simply because I'm a woman.

Indolent darling, how I love

to see the skin of your body so beautiful

shimmer like silk.

Upon your heavy head of hair

with its acrid scents,

adventurous, odorant sea

with blue and brown waves

on your hair.

To see you walking in cadence

with fine abandon,

one would say a snake which dances

on the end of a staff.

And your body stretches and leans

like a slender ship

that rolls from side to side and dips

its yards in the sea.

Like a stream swollen by the thaw

of rumbling glaciers.

When the water of your mouth rises

to the edge of your teeth.

- It seems I drink Bohemian wine, - Oh no!

- bitter and conquering. - Be quiet.

A liquid sky

that scatters stars

in my heart!

That's good.

- You didn't know that poem, huh? - I like it.

That's too good.

- You like it? - Yes.

You didn't know that poem, huh?

Oh, my poet.

I feel your balls.

- You like it, baby? - Yes.

My goodness.

Keep going.

Don't stop.

- That's so good. - Yes, you love it, huh?

My handsome stranger.

- Yes, I'm your handsome stranger. - My poet.

You liked it, huh?

Where are you going?

Surprise...

You just sleep.

At last, a gentleman.

What are you doing here, Miss Truchaud?

I stayed home, I was sick.

Could you come over to summarize today's class.

Well, up on.

The reception desk, please.

This is room forty-seven.

Have you seen a man go out?

Yes, that's it.

With a bag!

Really?

He paid the bill!

They're all the same.

Well, I'm leaving now.

No, not so fast.

Here.

You've got to teach me how to make love.

Come.

That's my bed, but nothing ever happened in there.

- What's your first name? - Hector.

Kiss me.

Caress me. Quick, fuck me.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

Tonight, we bring you an episode of the soap opera,

"The love life of Fr�d�ric Lansac".

This is the thousandth and final episode.

- Yes? - Could you give me my spare key?

I've lost mine.

Yes.

Thank you.

Would you mind coming up with me?

I' don't feel very well.

No, stay there.

What happened to you?

I've been robbed.

Even your...

Even my underwear.

I'm naked under this.

Why were you looking at me that way?

I wasn't looking at you.

You think I didn't see through your little game?

It's just that...

It's just that I love you.

Don't blame me for that.

I love you.

Don't make fun of me.

I know it's impossible, even mom told me it's impossible, but...

- When I see you walk by... - You what?

Well...

Explain yourself better.

Well...

I know what you really want.

Here.

Here!

But you don't...

You don't understand.

I don't want your money. It's you I love.

I love you for yourself. I don't want your lousy money.

You can keep your money.

All in all,

It's not so bad doing the shopping, the dishes,

making breakfast when it's for the man you love.

It's true, I realized it today.

I love him.

Hey, I'll make veal stew tonight.

It's his favorite dish.

I need to talk to you, Guy.

About what?

I learned a lot today.

So did I.

I know what you'll tell me.

That I doesn't care about you enough.

That I doesn't give you enough affection.

That I doesn't pay enough attention to you.

That I neglect you sexually.

And finally, that I care much more about my social success and my work

than about my marriage.

But...

Well, I've decided and my decision is irrevocable.

I'm leaving.

My lawyer will be in touch with you to arrange things.

Guy! No, wait!

I'd better hide that.

You bastard!

What have you done to my daughter.

Shut up and get dressed.

Dad, I'm not a child anymore.

- She's right, Mr. Truchaud. - Shut up and get out of here fast.

No good crying over spilt milk.

Anyway, I can afford it. So...

Get out of here, you bastard!

I'm gonna get you fired from the high school, you'll see.

Youth corrupter!

Excuse me, do you know the young girl on the fifth floor who's called Jo�lle?

Yes, a little.

Would you mind give her a note from me, please?

So long.

Here, thank you.

Hector, wait for me.

Hector! Hector!

- You're the girl from the fifth floor? - Yes.

I have a note for you.

Thanks.

Sounds like Charlotte is having a party.

I think I'll go have a look.

Don't worry, darling, I'm sure you'll enjoy it.

I suppose so, but your friend Charlotte is kind of strange.

Charlotte, kind of strange?

Really, I don't know what you mean.

Her eyes, her ways. She looks slutty.

Charlotte, slutty?

You've got some imagination, darling.

- Hello. - Hello.

- Hello. - Hello.

But...

But what are you doing here?

What are you doing here, girls?

- Nothing. - You're not gonna stay there?

- That's so good, that's so good. - Oh yes, that's good.

Bounce, bounce, bounce.

That's good.

Come on, come on. I'm gonna come, I'm gonna come.

Come on.

That's so good, that's so good.