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[somber music]

- [man] As artistic director
of the company,

I have a lot of
latitude right now.

I would not be surprised if
that latitude is taken away.

Maybe I'll even have to resign.

I thought about that.

[music continues]

People in the opera business
used to, in the old days,

talk about Tulsa Opera.

Everyone knew what
Tulsa Opera was doing,

they cared about it.

And I want them to care
about it again,

I want them to know
about it again.

Lucia has performed all
of the baritone roles

in Don Giovanni in
European opera houses,

but not the role
of Don Giovanni,
and it was a role

she particularly
wanted to perform.

As highly accomplished
and exciting as Lucia is...

It's not just America.

It hadn't been done anywhere.

[music continues]

[dramatic music]

[operatic singing]

- My name is Lucia Lucas.

- [bright music]
- [indistinct chattering]

- Hip, hip, hip, bump.

[operatic singing]

- I've been singing opera
my entire adult life.

I've been singing full time
as my only source of income

for the last 10 years
over in Germany.

I live there with my wife who
is also a full time singer.

- With live performing,
there's a freedom in it.

We have the collective cloud

between all of the different
media companies,

search engines,
streaming services,

all of these things that
just collect performances

and data and everything.

But this live performance,

this theater is still
sort of sacred in a way.

Only the people who
were in that theater

are going to experience
that performance.

[operatic singing]

There's no substitute for it.

No matter 4K, 8K, it's not
gonna make up for that energy

when you were in person.

[dramatic music]

[tablet whooshes]

- Hello, hi.

- Happy--happy anniversary.
- Happy anniversary.

It's 10 years tomorrow

if we go by
the original Facebook album,

that I uploaded wrong.

- [chuckles]
- Do you remember?

- April 12th,
how could I forget?

I didn't know our anniversary
for, like, three years.

[Lucia laughs]

[low music]

Well what about you?
You've been like

running around, like,
at this insane pace.

- [Lucia] Isn't this like
actually the first time

that we've video Skyped
since I've been here?

- [Ariana] Has it been a week?
[indistinct]

- No one knows.
No, it's Sunday.

I'm seeing like
this much of you.

- The rest of it's
not dressed.

- Okay, I don't know
if you're smizing

or if you're actually smiling.

- What?
- Can you not see
your framing?

Oh, sorry.

Never mind, stay where you are.

[chuckling] I--
- What?

- [laughing] Nothing,
it's my fault.

- Oh, my God.

[soft music]

[indistinct chattering]

- In any good opera,
there is an emotional core.

And if we can find what that is,

it's almost always timeless.

[indistinct chattering]

[piano playing]

Each new opera is compared
to these old operas

and if it's good,
it sticks around.

And if it's not quite as good,

then it just sort of
fades into the distance.

[piano playing]

[Lucia singing]

- [Ariana] How's it going?

- Feels good, gave my
jet-lagged A natural.

- I feel like it has,
like, more soul in it...

- Yeah.
- ...jet-lagged.

Special quality
that you can only get

from extreme stress.
- Exactly.

- I read this quote, I think
it was from Martha Graham

this exact moment in time,
doing what you're doing,

that will never
exist anywhere else.

And if you try to
control the situation,

then you lose that
authenticity in that moment,

that special moment.
- If we just take our impulses

and lean into them, and
we make the most authentic art,

I think that's the most
powerful, you know?

- I miss you.
- I miss you too.

- [woman] Don Giovanni is
a story of a charming person

who abuses his position
of wealth and power

and also uses
fantastic manipulation

in order to thoroughly
enjoy the chase.

That's why I think
Don Giovanniis a story

that's still so relevant now.

[operatic singing]

- If the opera feels foreign,

there's almost always
a way to update that.

And there are certain operas

that get that treatment
more than others.

You can always adjust
it to fit your time.

- [man] Don Giovanni is very
Don Juan, uber masculine,

sexy, predatory man,
toxic masculinity.

Like just the worst
type of masculinity.

Don Giovanni is a
master of disguise

in this production, you see
him change out of his clothes,

into the disguise
of some chic woman,

head scarf and a trench coat
and red heels and everything,

and just saunter out.

It shows that we're not doing
anything traditional here.

- [Tobias] One of the things
that sets me apart

from other artistic directors

is that I'm a practicing
composer of opera.

And so decisions that I make
about repertoire, casting

are informed by
the point of view I bring

as a composer, as a creator.
I make this stuff.

I like to give
singers role debuts

and if I can, American debuts.

Despite the fact
that she's American,

this will be her American debut.

[somber music]

- [Lucia] If you are the best
in the world,

but that exists
in your living room,

you're not gonna have
a career.

You have to have at least
some sort of structure

so that you get connected
with the right people.

Performing is a must,
but that's not the job.

The job is traveling
all over the place

and not getting sick.

Making personal
connections with people

and keeping up relationships,
that's the job.

Like, the job is not singing.

If you can just
sing really well,

but you don't have any
of the other things,

you don't have a career.

[singing opera music]

I enjoy using my engineer
brain to tackle problems.

So where video games come in

is they actually occupy
the part of my brain

that would worry about something
or think about something

that has to happen
in the future.

There's enough
interaction with my brain

that I don't think about things

and I can actually push
those things out of my brain.

[engines revving]

I think it was 1985 or 1986,
my dad went to Circuit City.

He felt bad
for divorcing my mom

and so he got a Nintendo.

I don't know, I think
it was a way for him

to just to sort of
connect with me too.

And--and we would play
video games.

Because he's--
he's a civil engineer

so puzzles were
really fun for him.

And it's always kept my brain
in a sharp thinking state

so that I can tackle these ways
to keep me in the business.

[soft music]

[indistinct chattering]

- [man] It's
an honor to have you tonight.

Here for the patron party,
of, uh, the Equality Gala!

Give yourself a hand.

[audience clapping]

Because this is an invitation
only event and you made it in.

So thank you so
much for being here.

We're gonna give away awards

to the youngest and the oldest.

So don't everybody run,

when I start looking
for the oldest.

- When I programmed
Don Giovanni

for this...the Tulsa Opera,

I started to search the world
for the best Don Giovanni

I could find for Tulsa.

And I found Lucia Lucas.

[audience clapping]

- [Lucia] Coming out
is difficult

and, you know,
not everybody agrees

and some people give
you a hard time.

The worst time, absolutely,
in my life was in junior high.

[Lucia singing]

It was because...I felt like

my body was betraying my mind

and I've always loved my mind

and my--the way
I think about things.

[continues singing]

I guess I had this irrational
belief that maybe my brain,

because my brain should be
the most powerful thing,

my brain can, like, do this.

[continues singing]

My--my body...

maybe there's
some way for my brain

to tell my body, to--to make
me grow up into a woman.

[continues singing]

I mean, of course it's
an irrational thought.

I thought maybe my brain
is strong enough

to--to make this happen.

Um... [sighs]

[continues singing]

I was an only child and my mom,
my dad got divorced.

[continues singing]

And that wasn't my fault, that--
that had nothing to do with me.

But...

[continues singing]

...it all happened
at the same time.

She didn't want me
to hate my dad.

[continues singing]

My dad, like, went off and got,
I think, like three girlfriends,

two or three girlfriends
in the meantime.

So I'd meet some--some woman,
and then she'd disappear

and I was like,
"Oh, okay, well."

[continues singing]

Uh, then I got my Nintendo.
[chuckles]

[Lucia continues singing]

I will commend him,
his family now,

they're--they're doing great.

He's taking care of his,
uh, his stepdaughters

really, really well.

His daughter and
son with his new wife.

Great father.

[continues singing]

[audience applauds]

Even though I love these games

and I'm playing
with a real person

on the other end of the line,

I'm not interacting
with them verbally.

[singing]

- [woman] When the Commendatore
is finally bled out,

[indistinct] give the
Commendatore a kiss...

roll him off.

- [man] All right.
- [Lucia] What--what--

what if I...
what if I rolled him...

At least once a month,
somewhere in the world,

there's a really big
tournament of Paper Magic.

And so I can show up there
and play with real people.

And I would draw the parallel

between live performance
there.

There's nothing like
playing in person.

To get real competition,
you have to go somewhere.

That's the same thing, you know.

You can watch a DVD
of Giovanniat home.

[singing]

But it's nothing, it is nothing,
absolutely nothing

like being in the theater.

- As a choreographer, of course,

I'm always interested
in the human body

and the statements
the human body's making.

And I'm always watching
that and fascinated by it.

Lucia has very strong
ideas as a performer.

The thing I really wanted
her to explore was this idea

that when she was
presenting as masculine,

she was wholly
believable as a man.

And when she was
presenting as feminine,

she was wholly
believable as a woman.

[piano music]

[singing]

- In the entire process, I try
to stay focused on my scope

as part of this puzzle

of the entire production
of Don Giovanni.

And my focus is
being a conductor

and be able to bring the score

that Mozart created to life.

That is my primary focus.

The entire rehearsal process,

this idea of Don Giovanni
being a master of deceit

and a mastery of being able
to change from male to female,

to a priest,
to, um, any other character

that he might choose to present,

that is going to be confusing.

It's going to be confusing
for the audience,

it's confusing for
the performers,

It's a huge challenge
for Lucia

to be able to go back and forth.

I do not know, we haven't
really had a chance

to talk about how that
affects her personally.

- There's ways that
Lucia is playing

with femininity and masculinity

that are bringing so much life

and so much psychosis
to the role.

It's really creating
a scary, scary character,

especially within the Me Too
movement in culture today,

it's really being emphasized
how awful he really is,

how evil he is.

- She wants people focus
on her actual music,

because that's what we do.

But some people buy
things for the package,

that's marketing.

I think it's brilliant that
Tobias brought Lucia to Tulsa,

not necessarily New York,
Chicago, San Francisco,

that makes everything
more sensational.

- [Michael] If it were me,
I would feel like

it was kind of taking away
from who I was as a singer.

But it's a double-edged sword,
I guess,

because maybe that's the only
reason why people are coming.

- There's more pressure that
people who really know voices

and really know opera, see this
and come away saying,

"Yes, that was the right
choice for Don Giovanni."

- [man] One thing I've noticed
covering this beat

is that a lot of regions are
struggling as a point of pride

to hold onto something
that gives their cities,

their regions definition.

- For a town this size,

I think we're the smallest
town in the United States

that has a ballet theater,

a symphony orchestra,
and an opera.

We have all of these things
because they were left to us

by the men who made their
fortunes in the oil business

around the turn of
the century.

- [woman] Passing down
opera now

from one generation
to the next

is getting tougher
than it used to be

to get those families
to continue to come.

It's not tough to get
them to donate money,

but we're competing with

so many other
entertainment options now.

- Opera has been dying
for 400 years, basically,

almost since it was born.

It's the biggest, most
complicated, most expensive

kind of art form to produce.

Right now, there's
tremendous talent in opera,

but there are also
tremendous challenges.

It's not really a popular
entertainment anymore.

In Europe, I think it's
a little bit more closely woven

into the national identity
of many countries.

It's also typically supported
by the state in Europe,

whereas in the United States,

it's really supported
by philanthropy

and then to a much smaller
extent, ticket sales.

But tickets really
don't cover the cost.

because it's so expensive to do.

- An average production costs us

around half a million dollars.

And if we actually
sold the tickets

at what the actual
true value would be,

a good seat, would be
about 300 dollars apiece.

For some reason, in the arts,

they feel that's too expensive,

but yet, they'll go next
door to the BOK Center

and drop 750 dollars on
a Metallica concert

and not even think
anything about it.

It is frustrating,
that dynamic,

because our product is every
bit as exciting

and interesting as
the concert at the BOK.

- [Tobias] As highly
accomplished as Lucia is,

it's an added benefit
that she is trans

because no trans singer has
ever performed Don Giovanni

in Europe either or
anywhere else in the world.

So it's not just America,
it hasn't been done anywhere.

[indistinct chattering]

I was the first to hire you.

- [Lucia] You were the first
to hire me in the States,
absolutely.

I mean, there were peoples
who said nice things.

They were like, "Oh yeah,
clearly you can sing,"

but they didn't hire me.

I wanna do as much
work as I can,

I wanna fill up my calendar.

Until my calendar is full,
I'm not worried about the money.

As long as I'm not losing money
on a gig, I'll do the gig.

But I'm also thankful to you
for standing up for me

because I...I don't know
what conversations
actually did happen,

but I'm sure that there was
at least one conversation

where somebody minimum
said, "Are you sure?"

- Oh, yes.
- [Lucia laughs]

- There was.

- If there wasn't the story
of me and how I came out

and if it wasn't out there,

then of course there
would be less press,

there just would be.

I mean, I guess, you know,
you lean into it a little bit,

but how do you not make it
this, like, circus, you know?

[low music]

I almost lost my
position in this career

because of coming out.

So I don't feel that bad

that I'm getting a little bit
of bump in advertising

from it, personally.

But representation matters.

If there is somebody who is
trans, who is growing up,

who has absolutely
no exposure to anything

because representation
doesn't matter,

they just sort of implicitly
pick up those cues.

Like that something's
not possible.

This is what happened when
I came out, my boss said,

"Okay, well, first thing
does your voice change?"

I was like, "No, no."

"Okay, who's done it before?"

I said, "It hasn't
been done before."

And luckily he said,

"Okay, well then let's see
what happens."

- [Tobias] If I had said
to you in the beginning,

"We're not gonna, um...
mention that you're trans."

- I would have done it.
- You'd have done it?

- Oh, yeah.

Like I said, I want
my career to go forward.

I'm not, like, gonna do anything
illegal or anything.

But, like, I'll do things

that are theoretically
uncomfortable for me.

- You think your career has
more potential to go forward

with the approach we took or
the approach we didn't take?

- Uh, the approach we took.
- You do?

- Yeah, I found that if
you are yourself, genuine,

I think that they like you,
the real you,

the you that is easiest to be.

People who try and, like,
put on a show

for people in their--
in their personal life, like,

I mean, that's exhausting too.

But sort of on a different edge,

what is the biggest problem
with opera right now?

Having less and less audience.

How do you fix that?

You get new audience.

- That's one of the reasons
I did this,

but we'll see if it works.

- Well, I know for sure
that there are LGBT people

that I've met, who are
going to come to the opera

who have never come to an opera.

That is new audience.
- They're buying tickets.

- They are buying tickets.

No?
- Yeah, it's very idealistic.

- [Lucia laughs]

- [Tobias] Trans people,
right now,

their rights are
being taken away

and they're being
discriminated against

by the president of
the United States.

Yes, it's important
for people to know

there's a great
trans opera singer

and she's performing
on the Tulsa Opera stage.

[somber music]

I think it is a miracle
that you're singing here,

that--that is what it is.

- Yeah, I think there's--
- And that miracle
does not translate

into the miracle of
selling out the house.

You know? We can sit here
and talk about art

till we're blue in the face,

but it's...there isn't much
to talk about.

- What are the people
being told?

That's Giovanni in Giovanni,
are they being told that?

Come see the show
on the fifth of May?

- No.

- Um, when--I'm guessing
people maybe have asked
what's going on.

Are they being
told that Giovanni

is going on,
on the third and the fifth?

- [waitress] No, I didn't know
what the show was.

I just know it's an opera.
- Do you know what
Don Giovanniis?

- So watch, watch,
this--this is great.

- No, I--no, I asked a question.

- I do--no, I don't.

- You don't know
what Don Giovanniis?

- I've heard it,
but I don't know what it is.

- So this is--this is a score
of Don Giovanni.

- Okay.
- It's an opera.

So if anybody here asks,

they can go to
the Tulsa Opera website.

- Okay, awesome, yeah. I'll re--

- Just in case anybody says
like, "Hey, what's going on?"

- Yeah, I'd like to be prepared
with an answer

- for sure.
- Yeah, thank you.

- Since, you know,
I have a lot to worry about

besides flyers and--
- I know--

- Why are you telling me this?

- I'm gonna make the cards,
I'm gonna go out.

I'm gonna do it on
my own dime, I don't care.

And I'm gonna hand them out.
People are gonna be like,

"What is this about?"
I'm gonna be like,
"Come to the show."

- You don't have time.

- I have time.

I have time.

If we sold out, do you think

that maybe it could possibly
be because you took a risk?

- Well, I'll certainly take
full credit for it, yes.

- [laughs]

- [Tobias] The model,
if we could afford it,

would be to build an opera
house that's the right size,

which would be somewhere between
eight and 11 hundred seats,

we really can sell that.

As of today, there's 609
tickets sold to Friday night

and 500 to Sunday.

And we're at 74,000
in revenue.

That's all that matters

is that we meet our
revenue projection.

You know, we were hoping
well over 110 or 120 maybe.

[stirring music]

If people don't come,
if there is,

what you might call
a silent backlash,

because Tulsans are very polite,

that could harm Lucia's
ability to get work

in opera in this country.

[music continues]

I'm invested in her having
a success here

for many reasons.

For her own sake,
for her own future.

Come what may, I wanted to
bring attention to this,

the 50th anniversary
of Stonewall.

It would not have happened
without trans people,

not without Marsha P. Johnson
and others,

But everybody else
that was at Stonewall,

every other segment of
our community has improved.

So I was aware of that when
I cast Lucia as Don Giovanni,

maybe I'll even have to resign.

I've thought about that.

[somber music]

- [Lucia] The funny thing is
I don't need to rely on

me being trans
to sell this production.

We don't have to
talk about it at all.

You can put a beard
on me and dress me up

so that there's not even like,

"Wait, you're doing
Don Giovanni,

but isn't Don Giovanni a boy?"

Fine, put a beard on me,
we'll go out there.

I'll sell people to
come toGiovanni ,

without even talking
about me being trans,

they won't even know.

I wouldn't be talking
about me being trans,

if people weren't interested.

And if people weren't
interested about

me being trans,

that's also fine.

Then I'll just live
my life happily, okay?

I could still have a career,
I could still get people there

because I'm a good singer,
because I'm a good actress,

because I command the stage.

[laughs]

Ariana, BBC calling, wake up.

We are having
some technical issues.

[imitates beeping]
Well, I heard that, five AM.

- [tablet whooshes]
- Oh, come on.

I can't hear
anything on your end.

Hello?

- [BBC Correspondent]
Hello, hello, Lucia.

- It's[indistinct] from BBC.
- Hi.

- [BBC Correspondent] I'd just
like to apologize,

we're having problems linking
up with our control room--

[indistinct chattering]

- Oh, wait, somebody
just called me.

- [Correspondent continues]
- [woman over phone] Hello,
this is BBC.

- Okay, hi, hi, BBC,
can you hear me?

Sorry, I think the controller
just got me.

- [tablet whooshes]
- [BBC Correspondent
speaking indistinctly]

- Yeah, I can hear you now.

They're gonna patch me
through to you, I guess.

- [woman speaking indistinctly
over phone]

- [BBC Correspondent]
Sorry, Lucia...[indistinct]

- I'm trying to--okay.

- [BBC Correspondent] Bye.
- Bye.

[clattering over phone]

Is that gonna work?

Can somebody hear me?
- [woman over phone] Hello.

Hi, I can hear you.

- It's 5:13 AM, my time.

- [woman] Oh, my gosh.
- But I'm still here.

- Wow, okay.

Thank you so much
for doing this.

And we are so,
so sorry for this mess up

and for keeping you waiting.

The fact that when
you're onstage,

you're inhabiting
cisgendered male roles,

And when you're offstage,
you're a trans woman.

How have you navigated
that on and offstage

ever since your transition?

- I was performing it onstage

and I was performing it
offstage.

There doesn't have to be any
dysphoria associated with it.

It's just another character.

What if I was playing an alien

that doesn't have
male and female roles?

Well then what about gender?

If you make everybody justify
their identity to you,

that's starting the conversation
off in a hostile direction.

If somebody comes
to me and says,

"I've never thought
about this,

I've never met anybody
who's had this,

I don't understand it at all."

That's a much better
place to come from.

- I come from Kentucky,
I live there now

and I just jet in
and out for jobs.

[bright music]

I had heard kind of
through the grapevine

they were hiring a transgender
singer to sing Giovanni

and as soon as
I heard that, I said,

"Oh gosh, how do I get to
be a part of that show?"

I wanna break down these walls

and before we can just get
over these dumb stigmas

about how people want
to live their lives,

and just how we wanna make
choices for everybody.

I wanna make that
completely clear.

How stupid is that?

They're making a decision
for themselves

to come out of the closet
or to transition

or to do whatever.

Why does that affect me at all?

Because my children
might understand

that they can be a male
if they were born female,

or they can be in love
with another girl,

or something like that, so what?

As long as humans have
been on the earth,

those things have
been there as well.

It's just ridiculous to deny
them as a natural part of life.

I'm over here
sitting in Kentucky

drinking a bourbon
and grilling a steak.

I can enjoy every
part of my life

without having to ruin
someone else's.

It's just stupid. [chuckles]

- I hope that I've not
fallen into the trap

of presenting this as
any kind of a freak show.

We're not saying Don Giovanni
is a transgender person.

What we're saying is

Don Giovanni is
a master of disguise.

Some of those disguises
are masculine,

some of those
disguises are feminine.

What we have done is
completely deliver the opera

that Mozart and Da Ponte wrote
in which a character says,

"You will never
discover who I am."

I think it's much more about

somebody who is cunning
and manipulative

than it is about somebody
who's transgender.

- [man] In performances,
I have seen physical reactions
of people

that love the sound
that she produces,

but they will not look at her
while she's singing.

I find that extremely
fascinating because

that separation
is something that tells you

a lot about how people feel
about gender,

they feel about sound.

And stereotypes
of male and female

and what a woman
should sound like,

a man should sound like.

- Voice doesn't have a gender.

The average difference in pitch

from an average female voice
and an average male voice,

and I say average because
nobody has the same voice,

is less than an octave,
it's like a fifth.

[soft music]

If you were on a piano
and you press the keys down,

you just went one,
two, three, four, five...

...that's about
the difference in the voice.

[dramatic music]

- [Hidenori] Last year
I was here,

and this year I came back.

I was hugely shocked
how much Tulsa changed.

And probably the people
in Tulsa

don't even notice it because
you are seeing it every day.

A lot of people coming from
different states, different
city,

and those change is
affecting people's mind.

[music continues]

But I'm curious how
it's gonna change.

- Hi, my name's Lucia Lucas.

I've been singing opera
my entire adult life.

I've been singing opera
for the last 10 years

as my only source of income,
I'm a full time opera singer.

I always thought that
I was going to have, like,

this really quick career
and just shoot off

and then after that, I thought

that maybe I could sort of
go out of the spotlight

and transition then.

And what happened was,
my career wasn't taking off,

but my career also
wasn't going away.

I had a nice,
steady, opera career.

I just sort of thought,
I can do this,

but if I'm not true to myself,

I don't think that
I'm going to enjoy this career.

Well, it took me
a year and a half

for my dressing
room to get changed.

And they asked the two guys,

if it was okay
if I was in their room.

They didn't ask me anything
about my comfort zone,

about where I wanted to be.

And at that point, I had all
my legal documentation changed.

And I said, "Look, if you
wanna fight me on this,

we can go to town now, really."

Nobody should have to do that,

so I'm gonna fight for
the things that I need

and I'm gonna fight
for my comfort.

I don't know what
else I should say.

Oh! I'm here for an opera.

[audience laughs, claps]

- [woman] Definitely,
but thank you again, so much.

- I--I hope what I said
made sense.

- Yes.
- It made perfect sense.

- Okay. [laughs]

- It was fabulous, yeah.
-It was wonderful.

- We're in the middle
of tribal elections
for Cherokee Nation.

But what you were saying
resonated with me too

within our tribal community.

- The thing is--is we think
about our groups,

and we don't always
think about other stuff,

but if we use language that
is inclusive for everybody,

then we will hit a group
and rights for that group

that we--weren't necessarily
in the forefront of our brain.

[low music]

- Lucia Lucas has just
done an amazing job

of trying to elevate
ticket sales.

She's out and about,
talking to people,

anyone who will listen.

Ticket sales are lagging
a little bit

and quite honestly,
I really feel that

when it's all said and done,
that we will hit our budget.

We're not trying to make
a political statement,

we're not trying
to offend anyone,

we're just trying
to bridge the gap

between different ideas,
thoughts and some prejudices.

- [Hidenori] All the companies
I've been working,

majority of the audience
or donors or sponsors

are Caucasians.

Yes, white--I mean,
white people.

I think it's just
because opera itself,

it came from Catholic Church.

So the root of this music
is for Western people.

And I think that form
hasn't been changed at all.

- The Tulsa Opera Board is
about, I think, 30 to 50 people,

it's a pretty
good-sized board,

but it is very diverse.

From young people,
old people, uh, LBGQ people,

to rich people,
to not rich people,

so it's pretty diverse.

And--and obviously
with the board,

the intention is
you want the board

to bring their
constituents to the opera

and support the opera.

So that's their job,
but we've done a good job

on getting new board members

that are all not just
rich white people.

- [James Kicklighter]
Can I push back on you
for that for a second?

- Okay.
- I actually, I wasn't gonna

ask you about this
but you brought it up.
- Okay.

- [James] I went to the website,
I only saw two people of color

that are on that board.

- But there more gay people.

I--I--you know what?
Yeah.

- You know, it's tough.

I really...I wish I had
an answer to that question,

I really don't.

That's something that, uh,
we've struggled with

and I think we are going to
continue to struggle with.

- [Hidenori] This could be
actually the shift.

It could be the one
big factor to flip the coin

and make everything different.

[indistinct chattering]

- I need a mirror.

[indistinct chattering]

- Okay, I am sleepy and oily.

- [pleasant music]
- [indistinct chattering]

So sometimes we think of women
as having really high voices

and they speak
really, really high.

But that's not,
in actuality, how it works,

we have a pitch that
we sort of hang out at.

And then men have a pitch
that they sort of hang out at.

And it's funny,
my voice didn't ever crack.

My voice was super
smooth adjusting

and there was a point where
I was actually perceived

as my mother on the phone.

Because of course, genetics,
we're gonna sound similar.

When you're singing,
I guess you have more
control over your voice.

I mean, I do have lots
of control over my voice,

singing low all the way up
to singing really high.

[singing indistinctly]

[audience claps]

♪ I'll be loving you always ♪

♪ With a love that's true,
always ♪

[audience claps]

- Come to Don Giovanni.
- [laughs]

[audience laughs]

- If you don't like what
we do with this opera,

then you will never like opera.

Look, I'm not trying to
sell you on the opera.

I'm trying to say that
if you don't like this,

you're never gonna like opera

and you could just
stop after this one.

This is what I'm saying.

How about that?

- Actually, I already
made that deal.

- Okay.

- "Honey, I'm sorry,
I just don't like opera.

I'm not going again."
He's like, "You don't have to.

I can go with [indistinct].
- [Lucia] Okay.

- I'm gonna go to see you.
- [woman] I know you.

- [Lucia] You should,
it's my show.

It's called Don Giovanni.

- How are you holding up?

- I'm fine.
- Good. [chuckles]

You had a long day,
I was like, "Wow."

It's interesting to me
because opera has always had

a certain kind of
gender fluidity.

And there have always
been trouser roles,

roles that were sung
by women playing men,

including in Mozart.

And so to me, it's interesting

that Lucia will be
a trouser role Don Giovanni

taking on the most
toxic masculinity,

semi-sociopathic role
in the canon.

Part of a long tradition,
but on the other hand,

it's also radically
breaking tradition.

[somber music]

- So I choose--
- Do you want Mario?

- Yes.
- All right, great.

Well, we're gonna do it
relaxed just for a second,

get our--get our bearings.

- That's good,
I get very nervous.

- [chuckles]

I have not played
video games with somebody

in years, probably.

- Really?
- Oh, yeah.

All right.

[video game music playing]

So the left one is
how you throw the...

- I'm not into throwing
things that much.

- [chuckles]

- You're not even
trying and you're one.

And I--and why am I
struck by lightning?

What did I do?

- I'll slow down then.

- No, don't,
you don't have to do that.

I don't--I don't need charity.

- [laughs]

- I'm being obstructed.

- What do you mean?
- Oh, fuck!

I'm 12! I'm the--I'm last.

That's really typical
of my ability.

- I was told, as a child,

how I could act and
how I couldn't act a lot, so...

- Really?

- My feminine behavior
was corrected.

- Well, my Tourette's
was corrected.

My parents used
to beg me to stop.

"Please, please stop."

[somber music]

An unfair comparison?

- Not at all.

- [Tobias] Growing up
with Tourette's

at a time when
it was undiagnosable

was a very difficult thing.

And it created
enormous issues for me

psychologically and emotionally.

Spending a lot of time alone.

I did feel like a freak
growing up, because I was gay.

I went to
a series of psychiatrists
from an early age.

But a young psychiatrist,
he was gonna cure me

and we spent quite
a long time

talking about how to...
how to cure this problem.

When I was 18, actually my
first day of registration

in conservatory,
I met somebody.

And it was very shortly
thereafter I went to my shrink

and said, "I wanna enjoy
this while I'm young

and embrace it.

So I don't wanna change it."

That was right around
the time of Stonewall.

He said, "Well, in that case,
I can help you adjust to it."

And I said, "I don't think
I need any help
adjusting to it.

I like it, actually,
I really like it.

So we can work
on other things."

But I actually had
accomplished my other goal,

which was to be able
to practice my art

and be successful at it.

- Well, first of all, I think
that parents, generally,

want what's best for their kids.

- If they'd only known
how it made...

me feel on a daily basis

that I was failing them.

- Me too.
- Maybe they wouldn't
have done it.

but they couldn't know
because they didn't understand

why I was like that.
They had no idea,

no frame of reference
and probably, I guess,

your parents didn't either.

- I think maybe my mom
had an idea.

- Really?
- Not that I was trans,

but I think she thought
I was gay growing up.

She would always say...

[sighs] She would always say,
"I'd love you no matter what."

- But?

- "But it's a really hard life."

Well, that was mid-'80s,
everybody's dying of AIDS.

Of course she doesn't
want me to be gay.

- [Tobias] I never thought,
as a young man,

that I was ever interested
in getting married.

I was lucky to be gay because
I didn't have to get married.

As the years went by
with the same partner

and we began to think
about the future

and the rights that
we were denied.

it became actually mandatory
that we become married

because we would have
lost my medical insurance.

Ruth Ginsburg, who is
a devotee of my work,

having attended several operas,

married us right
in the Supreme Court.

So maybe since then,
my level of interest

in issues that affect
this community has increased.

I consider myself very lucky.

I am, in many ways,
better off,

so I am interested
in helping people

that are still oppressed.

- That's--that's my dad.

This is my stepsister
who's coming.

So my dad and my stepsister
are coming to see the show.

I don't know what to think.

I--it's--it's too much of
a distraction

for me to really think
about it before the show.

I don't know
what I wanna talk...

- My mother came to everything.

But she traveled all over
the world for my things.

Having a mother live 99 years,

you get pretty used
to having them around

and in your life all the time.

We were in constant
communication by
email and FaceTime

so, she was very modern.

A very big inspiration
to me as an artist

she was...making art till
six days before she died.

So, we were very enmeshed.

[somber music]

- I know that Lucia has
found it very difficult

to park Don Giovanni
at the end of the day,

and go back to just being Lucia.

When you ask somebody
to dig into themselves deeply

to find those aspects
of the character

that are maybe
hard to live with,

it's hard to walk out the door
at the end of the working day

and switch all of that off.

- [Lucia imitates a scooter
engine revving]

I can do that, right?
- [Denni] Yeah, absolutely.

- [singing] Uh...

- And I think you probably
wanna stop

roundabout there if you can.

It feels like a
good position to me.

And when you can,
put your parking brake on,

it's by your left foot.

- Do I get off?
- [thudding]

- I think you should feel naked,
psychologically naked.

He has suddenly no audience,
he has nobody to sing to.

- Okay.

Who am I speaking to?

Who am I speaking to
in opera?

Who is my performance for?

I am not trying to
speak to anybody.

I am trying to do
the best version of my art

that I think is interesting
and thought-provoking,

no matter who you are.

I'm not performing
for the king.

I don't need to customize
my show and my references

for one person.

I am giving
a multi-layered performance.

I'm giving Golden Age singing
to the people who love opera,

I'm giving silver screen acting
to all the Netflix crowd.

I guess that's
our target audience.

So if we're speaking
to anybody,

we're speaking to new people,

we're speaking to
the new audience.

- [Denni] ...no audience,
he has nobody to sing to.

- Okay.
- And I think it would be great

to see a moment of
vulnerability in that character.

- I don't know if
I'm feeling it today, but--

- Okay, sure.

Play with it and see.

- Yeah, I mean two things
is like logistically this thing,

like, where to get it,
how to set it up,

and how to get back onto it
without it all looking staged.

- Absolutely.
- Um...

But, I'm--with all
the extra stuff, I'm...

I don't know,
I'm like, losing my own.

So--we can talk about it
at some other time

but I feel like
I'm losing myself

and then, like, I don't have
Giovanni to protect me now

because I've been projecting
Giovanni the entire time,

except for the parts
when we're talking

and building the scenes, so...
- Mm.

So put all that into
the canzonetta,

that nakedness when
you feel strong enough.

And I think the important thing
is that it's amazing,

all the outside publicity
work that you're doing.

But ultimately,
we have to build a show

otherwise we're not
publicizing anything.

So your energy can't be pulled
away by too many other people

dragging it away from you.

- Of course, but--but if I say
that I'm not gonna do this,

or I'm not gonna do that--
No, I'm saying like,

yes, that would be
the best thing,

would be for me to be like,

"I'm sorry, can we cancel
all the interviews,

I'm not gonna do
any more performances,

I'm not gonna go out
and like, give speeches

about workplace inclusivity,"

and all the random stuff
that I've been doing,

if I shut that down

and then I take all of
my free time for me, yeah, fine.

I mean, can I do that?

- Yes, you can absolutely,
at any moment.

A performer's preparation time
is absolutely crucial.

And I think, for Lucia,

because there's been
so much media interest,

constant interviews,
a lot of pressure,

it's been a really
demanding time for her.

I think more demanding than
she realized it would be.

And that's a tough thing
when you're preparing a role

as big and demanding
as Don Giovanni.

[soft music]

Playing somebody who
lives on the edge,

who is prepared to always go

beyond where anybody else
will go,

I think probably becomes

quite a fun, buzzy,
attractive thing to do.

And then it's very difficult
to suddenly find yourself,

at the end of the day,

in your hotel room
on your own.

You don't go home and
have dinner with your family

and relax and
switch off a bit.

You go home and you relive
every minute of the day,

there's kind of no escape.

It's like having a hamster
on a wheel in your head.

It just keeps going round
and round and round.

You have no outlet from it.

That's also part of the skill
of being in our world.

[dramatic music]

- [woman] What we do
behind the scenes,

is a well-organized dance,

it's not glamorous.

You get to deal with
all of this stuff.

Well, there's also
the maintenance and the laundry

and being sure that
everybody has what they need.

To remove sweat and
perfume in something silk,

we use a cheap 100 percent
vodka in a spray bottle

and we just mist it on
and when it dries,

it dissipates and takes all of
the smell out with it.

You kind of have--

- One for the clothing,
one for me.

One for the clothing,
one for me.

- Exactly.

One for the dresser.

When I heard that we're
updating it to the 1950s,

there was a little piece
of me that was not happy.

- Have you ever seen Amadeus?
That--

- Mm-hm.
- Do you think that he would
have a problem with updating?

I don't know.
- I don't know either.

I know that if we can take
anything away from Mozart

and the lightness
of his music, maybe?

- Maybe.

- I mean, it tells a great story
of a crazy man.

- A crazy man.
- [Deb laughs] Well,
he's a psychopath.

He preys on the people
that he can manipulate.

- She's also trying to stay

in the Don Giovanni
character all the time,

which is her choice
to make it the success

and he's the master of
disguise and deception.

[dramatic music]

- [Lucia] I don't know
the fruits of my labor yet

and we'll see who comes.

People are on their phone
all the time.

There are actual humans
that I haven't seen

in 10, 15 years even,

that I communicate fairly
regularly on the phone,

but to see them in person,
is special.

And I think we're missing out
on that humanity.

In the Gathering Place,
that's what I was hoping for.

I just sort of wanted to do
a fact-finding mission.

But it seemed like
other people

were more concerned with

flyers being handed out
which is the complete opposite

of what I wanted to do.

I'm making a commercial
about this park.

Now, this is what I'm doing,
I've decided.

- Why do you feel
that's necessary?

- Because we have to get people

but we don't wanna be
obnoxious to people.

- [Tobias]
If she does something

and then she says,
"Was I good?"

That's a rhetorical question.
[chuckles]

This is the kiddie park.
- [Lucia] Yeah, I know.

- Maybe down by
the lake is better.

- That's kind of
what I was thinking

because wrangling kittens
is more difficult.

- They're the wrong
sort of people.

- They're the wrong
sort of people.

Because they need to take
their kids to Chuck E. Cheese,

not to the opera.

All of these individual
interactions are important.

Handing flyers out
doesn't work.

We're making an opera.

- [man] Oh, okay. Oh, yeah!
- [woman] Nice,
that's pretty cool.

[speaking German]

- [Tobias] Are you coming
to Don Giovanni?

- I don't know, I guess we
have no tickets for that, no.

- You should buy them
because she's Don Giovanni.

- Okay, I'm doing--
- She's amazing.

- I'm doing Don Giovanni.

I'm trying to show them
that hiring somebody

from on the other side
of the world is worth it.

[indistinct chattering]

- We grew up with it all.

- [Lucia] I did
what I wanted to do.

What I wanted to do
was make a connection

with individual people.

Individual people that
will become fans of opera,

individual people that
will become fans of me.

I just got here I don't
have a whole lot of time.

What's the best place to
check out in the park?

I communicate with
people all the time

on various social
media platforms and
also through email.

Sorry to disturb you.

[bright music]

I use the camera
as sort of a lure.

If people know were too busy,

I'm not gonna get
to talk to them.

No, come on, let's go.
No, no, no, no, no,
come on, let's go.

Come on, go, no, just, sorry.

He's gonna make me do this.

So I'm not gonna talk to you,

I'm just gonna give you this.

I wasn't gonna do this,
but here.

I'm doing an opera here.

I don't know if you've
ever been to the opera.

Anyway, if you're around,
it's fun, bye.

- [Tobias]
It's not worth the time.

In the end, was it effective?

I think it was important
to Lucia to do that

to be out in public
telling random strangers

they should come see her
inDon Giovanni ,

but I wouldn't say it was
a fiasco, but

[chuckles] I might.

[intense music]

- [Lucia] I'm not aware of
ticket sales.

I was going to be
aware of ticket sales,

but I've been told,
repeatedly,

it's not my job
to sell tickets

and I've sort of
taken the hint.

That's not something
that they really want me

to be a part of so
I'm not gonna be a part of it.

I have plenty of other stuff
to worry about, really.

Nobody's answering
the elephant in the room.

The elephant in the room
is if you can't--

if it's that hard
to sell tickets,

and you're funding
90 percent of it outside,

then--then what are you doing?

If we change it to
100 percent of the funding,

is it gonna fill this place?

So this is why I compare
Germany and the US
all the time.

In Germany, they say,
"No, we want art

that is cheap enough for
the general public to afford

because we value art
and we think it's good

if the general public
has art in their life."

But the American system
is still looking at it

as like, "Oh, well, we need
to make so much ticket sales."

And it's like,
if your business model
is based on donations,

you're not making profit.

If your art form can't pay
for itself by ticket sales,

then does the art form
deserve to survive?

I always have to
remember why I'm here.

I probably said this before,
but, "Remember why you're here,"

is a quote that stuck with me
and I'm here to do this show.

In...in here, on this stage.

- Have I ever done
this much promotion

for any singer before?

And the answer is
absolutely not, never.

She wouldn't be doing
all of those events

if I didn't create them
for her.

I composed this.

I do have a lot of confidence
in my composition abilities.

And, this, I do see this as
a kind of composition, I do.

Putting an opera together,
creating a star,

it is analogous to composing.

- ♪ Looking off from
the river bank ♪

♪ And with
an untouched brush ♪

♪ I wiped away
astonished tears ♪

90--90 percent there. [laughs]

- For you maybe,
about 50 percent of the notes
for me,

60 maybe, 60 percent, so.

But I'm the composer,
so I can make it up.

- So you're always right?
- They always say, you know,

"It doesn't matter if you play
wrong notes, you wrote it.

So you can change it
while you're playing it."

But it's not true, actually,
because it's published.

It's not easy for me to compose
as every piece I compose,

I start out thinking,
"I can't do this.

I don't know how to do this."

And so each one
is a new challenge.

- I'm not assuming
anything on you.

I'm just saying that
if I go do a role

that I've done before, I don't
get the same sort of energy.

- That must be
similar to what I get

because everything I do
is a world premiere.

- But you've written
all these notes before

just in a different order.

[both laugh]

Sorry, that was--that was corny.

- I was in my early 20s and,

you know,
when I read about myself

in the New Yorker,
I'll never forget that review.

"A genuine creator with
a fertile unforced vein

of invention."

I love that quote.

And I was 24, so I thought
that's really great.

But I didn't feel like
I had arrived yet.

I felt this is going
in the right direction.

But composers always
feel insecure,

they never feel like
they've got enough

or had enough recognition ever.

Imposter syndrome,
yeah, I have that.

- I--I don't have that.
- You don't have it?

- I know sources of
insecurity that were there

that I went back and conquered.

There was a lot of
emotional edging,

like coming up to the edge
and then going,

"No, I can deal with that,"
and then coming back

and then pushing that edge
and pushing that edge

and pushing and pushing that.

I was a bad clarinet player,
I was a bad trumpet player.

I never had quick
success in my career

on any level whatsoever.

So everything that I built,
it was piece by piece.

I think I've always
sort of had a good gauge

of how--how good I am.

I think that if you get
too much exposure too soon,

then maybe you can
have imposter syndrome.

- Well, imposter syndrome
is...is also perfectionism,

you're never good enough
and I do have that.

I wish I had a chance
to make it better.

- Maybe if I was like
making a record album

or something like that,
and I could make it perfect

then it would be different.

- And one of my
teachers used to say,

"How do you know when
a piece is finished?"

And he said,
"When you just give up."

[somber music]

- Then it's done?

[chuckles]

- And he said,
"Remember, self-doubt

need not be an animal adversary,

but can be trained and
kept as a useful pet."

- For what?

- To make you always
try to be better

and not feel that everything
you write is a masterpiece.

- Hm.

- I didn't know her
very well before.

We've gotten to know
each other a little bit

in the last year and a half,

but I'm still
getting to know her.

The singers in operas
that I produce

will always be instruments
of the composer

who wrote the operas.

The greatest musical
instrument that there is

is actually alive.

They are born and
they live and they die.

[music continues]

My London agent, I asked her,

"What happens when--when you die
when you're a composer?"

And she said, "Well, you're
not played for 35 years,

then you're either played
or you're never played."

If you have all your faculties,

you could keep composing
until you're 104

as one of my teachers did,

and then he couldn't compose
anymore, so he decided to die.

So it's about surviving, really.

[music continues]

- I feel very centered
right now, I feel very calm.

The only stuff that
I'm actually worrying about

is--is putting
the show together.

And the only things that
frustrate me or annoy me

are when the process isn't
as smooth as I would like.

- Of course, voices
are quite vulnerable.

Most singers wake
up in the morning

and the first thing
they do is go, [hums, sings]

"Oh, yeah, it's okay,
it's there today."

- If you are under the weather
even just a little bit,

you have to learn how
to just get past it.

- [Denni] The timing of our
Leporello, Clark, getting sick

was quite fortuitous.

We had put the whole
production on its feet.

Everybody knew their staging.

So even though he was sick,
he could be at home,

he could be looking through
his score lying in his sick bed.

We have an assistant
director who stepped in

and physically embodied the role

because he knew all the moves

and could be a warm
body in the space

and give people to react from.

And luckily, Hide
had sung the role

in a different production.

So we were able to
keep moving forward

in the rehearsal process.

[operatic singing]

The difficult thing of course,

is that one of the key
relationships in this opera

is between Don Giovanni
and Leporello.

And it's a very symbiotic,
very, very close relationship.

- I think Tobias was,
uh, very worried.

And it was honestly just
like a little stomach bug,

not a big deal.

- It felt like a weird sort of
ethereal gaslighting,

the other day when we were
trying to do the show run.

The voice is coming
from somewhere else.

And even if you
hit all the things,

it's not the same
as having the voice

coming directly
from that character.

[bright music]

[singing]

[Hidenori singing]

[Lucia and Hidenori singing]

- [Tobias]
In the rehearsal process,

the director and the conductor
are always nervous.

If they're not remembering
everything exactly

are they gonna pull it off?

- [Michael] The week of
the performance

is when things just happen.

The power of adrenaline
is amazing, truly,

especially in the opera world.

Without being too shady,
I think there's a huge overstep

from confidence into arrogance,
it happens a lot.

- [laughing]
- [bright music]

- [Lucia] We need a Leporello,
like...

that's it.

[operatic singing]

You were fantastic,
thank you so much.

- Thank you for your help.

- My help?

[singing continues]

[Michael singing]

- [Lucia] There were things
that were question marks,

and had I had Leporello
during the room run,

maybe he would have had
the same sort of question marks

maybe we would have
worked through it,

maybe would have been fine.

Maybe we would have reminded
each other, in the moment,

just with him in the right spot
and me in the right spot

making the right face.

It would like, trigger
everything to happen properly.

The bigger my star gets,
the more pressure it is

to deliver all the time.

- [Denni] Do artists want
to be famous

or do they want to
show what they can do?

I think it's a big difference.

I think the cult of fame,

especially since
we've had reality TV,

is a very strange
thing these days.

Kids grow up thinking,
"I wanna be famous."

And when you ask them, "What
do you want to be famous for?"

They don't know, they just say,

"I wanna be famous,
I wanna be a celebrity."

That's not a skill,
that's not a talent.

Artists have a very
specific skill and a talent,

which they use to
express either narratives

or political ideas
or cultural ideas.

And that's very different
from being famous.

[singing]

- If my voice was this tired,
in like three or four days,

then I would be concerned.

Using my voice in ways
that are not the show,

extra performances
that we've done,

extra talking that I've done
in loud environments...

[singing]

...that's always a concern.

[singing]

[muffled applause]

[tense music]

I've been trying not
to think about the fact

that my dad's coming,

because I need my energy
for the show.

And actually having him
here is distracting.

He hasn't seen me in 10 years

because going to Europe
was too hard for him.

[dramatic music]

[singing]

You know, he has four kids
that were going through school

or university or whatever.

[singing]

But still--still feels like
a lifetime.

I didn't come out until
four and a half years

after I was there and
he still hasn't seen me,

he hasn't see me at all.

And it's like,
"Oh, you're gonna be
performing in the States?

Oh, we'll come see you."

Okay, great.

[singing]

The reason my family
has been accepting

is because they knew that
I was going to leave them.

I never asked for
their acceptance.

I was not asking, I was telling.

I said, "I've had enough,
I'm trans, this is it.

If you need to leave,
there's the door, don't care."

And I think my approach to it
made it different for them.

If I would have went
to them and said,

"Hey, I'm thinking
about coming out,

is it okay if I come out?"

Then I don't know how
they would have reacted.

I'm okay without you,
are you okay without me?

[singing]

I know that everybody
can't do that.

I know everybody
doesn't wanna do that.

But like I already moved to
the other side of the world

with my wife,
and my wife is my family.

[singing]

And if you wanna be
part of my family

or my extended family,
that's fine,

but if not, I'm not asking
for permission.

Or forgiveness.

[singing]

[applause]

[dramatic music]

[music continues]

- [Denni] I think perhaps,
in our profession,

we're all slightly
adrenaline junkies.

And the high we get
from the premiere,

feeling that you're giving
100 percent of yourself

in that moment,

that you're getting a huge
reward for a lot of hard work,

it's a big buzz.

We give up a lot,
we sacrifice a lot.

We're not there for family,

we're not there for
family birthdays,

we're not there for
high school graduation,

we're not there on
the first day of school,

we're not there to hold a hand
when somebody's sick at home.

We give all of those things up.

But we never really
feel like we go to work.

We go on a stage and we play

and we're supported
by fantastic music

and we're surrounded by other
artists playing around us.

And that's a huge privilege.

Of course,
you can't replace family.

But the other thing we all
get as freelance artists

are the bits in between
where you do get to go home.

So you do also have
that in your lives.

And if you're lucky,

and you're surrounded
by family and friends
and loved ones

who understand that,

you keep that life together
as well.

- [Tobias] Does she owe me?

I've had letters from people
who run other opera companies

and they wanna hear her.

But I can tell you, already,

that's a sign of success.

- But you have to
really hear somebody

in a theater with an orchestra.

It's a kind of a unique thing
in that sense

because it's not
about the small room,

it's not about the microphone,
it's about really connecting.

- [Tobias] The response I saw
today from the invitation

that her agent sent
out on my behalf,

I said it's very good.

And she said, "Well, yes,
I have a very good agent."

And I was thinking,
"But, do you...do you...

you remember that
I got you that agent, right?"

I think she's very loyal.

She does remember that
and that she will.

She will remember.

Some people forget, you know.

You--you give them a chance,
they...

they do forget or they
don't care, they move on.

I don't think
hindsight is 20/20,

I don't see things clearly.

My clearest vision is when
I'm creating something new.

- [Lucia] Tobias is why
this is happening.

I--I feel an enormous
amount of gratitude

and I will always have
that gratitude towards him,

no matter where I'm singing,
no matter what I'm doing,

and I'm always going to
wanna check in with him

and make sure that I'm going
in the right direction.

I--I see him as a mentor
as well.

To say, look, we've cast
a trans woman as Giovanni.

It's her US debut.

She's actually American,
she grew up here,

she got training here,

she went away and
now she's come back.

Like there's a lot of things

that if you just put my
name in the program booklet,

yeah, then it's not anything.

- [dramatic music]
- [singing]

Switching back and
forth between gender,

the greatest thing about it

is that it shows how
silly these boxes are.

It's all a play that
everybody does all the time.

[singing continues]

It's just a lot of people
buy into it, and I don't.

[laughing]

[grand music]

[ensemble singing]

[dramatic music]

[audience applauding]

[Hidenori singing]

[singing]

- I make...

I make my art for me.

[Lucia singing]

Your art has to be for you.

[singing]

You can't...

[singing]

You can't make other
people like you.

- [singing continues]
- [breathes deeply]

- You can't live your
life for other people.

I tried. [scoffs] Doesn't work.

[muffled singing]

If you're good,
then people like you.

And if it's honest,
people like you.

Or they won't.

And the people who
don't like you, don't...

don't give a shit about them,
they don't matter.

The people who like you,
hold on to them.

I mean, that was the ultimatum
to my family.

[ensemble singing]

- Awesome. Just awesome.

I'm so proud of you.

[audience applauds]

[applause continues]

Amazing, just amazing.

[indistinct]

- Thank you for coming.
- It was really...

[applause continues]

Very, very good.
Yeah, you did great.

- Thank you, Dad.
- [indistinct]

Well, I've been doing it--doing
it for 10 years, full time now.

So it's a little bit different
than Del Oro High School.

[chuckles] Pajama Game.
- Yeah, absolutely.

Uh, yeah,
it really turned out good.

[soft music]

- Hi, long time no see.
- [Lucia] Thank you so much
for coming.

- It was beautiful,
you're beautiful.

- [Lucia] It's--
it's a wild show.[laughs]

- It is a long time from DO,

from high school days
and college days, so.

- [Lucia] Yeah.
- [Kaitlin] It's been great,
though.

We'll let you change.
- [Jack] Okay.

- [Lucia sighs]
- Deep breath.

- [Jack] There's a party
out there.

- [Lucia] Yeah, yeah,
you're invited to the party.

I don't know
exactly where it is.

Can you--can you let them know?

This is Tobias Picker who--

- Tobias, we met him,
he brought us down.

Yeah, absolutely.
- Yeah, he hired me
a little over a year ago

and sang his piece
for him and uh...

yeah.

And we're gonna--we're gonna do
something in the future,

well, it's public now, right?

- [Tobias] Yeah, we're--
- So he's writing
an opera for me.

So we're gonna do Danish Girl

and we'll see what
happens with it.

I don't know if
you've seen the movie, but...

- [Kaitlin] Oh, no, no.
- Um, yeah,
it's a historical person.

And then there was
a book and a movie

and all sorts of stuff, so.

- [Kaitlin] That's fantastic.
- Okay.

- [Lucia sighs]
- [Kaitlin] A lot going on.

- Yeah, I need to, like,
get out of this.

But we can have
a calm time tomorrow.

I mean, as calm as it is
with--with the media circus

that is my life right now.

But thank you so much.

Thank you so much.

- [Kaitlin] We'll let you
get changed.

- [Lucia] Thank you.

[soft music]

Hey!

- [Ariana] Hey, so?
- [chuckles]

I had a great show.

- [Ariana] I tried
to stay up all night.

- [chuckles] Did you?

- [Ariana] Lucia,
are you okay?

- I'm not just saying that,
it was really good.

- [Ariana] What am I
telling about?

- About our 10-year anniversary.

- [Ariana] Do you want me
to cry?

- [Lucia] We'll celebrate
when I get back, okay?

- [Ariana] No, I'm gonna
like, hold her in my arms

and I'm not gonna let her go

because I'm scared
that she left

and went to scary America.

Everything I read online
of what people are saying

about gay people,
queer people, all people,

it scares me and
she's my wife.

I love her and
I worry about her

and especially when
she travels far away from me.

That's always in
the back of my mind.

I mean, it's so important
what she's doing.

She's an opera singer.

The fact that she
finds time for everything,

that she makes time
for everything.

I think that's incredible.

- We built this together.

- All of the things
that she has, like, that's...

that you can't find.

[soft music]

- Trans is such a small part
of my identity.

It's shaped some things
in my life,

but it's a very
small part of my life.

There are much more
single events

that have impacted my life

than me being trans.

History is the present's
view of the past.

I mean, maybe it
means something,

maybe it doesn't mean something.

I hope that
individual peoples,

individual connections
that I have made

while I've been here,

with trans people, with
LGBTQ people, with opera fans,

I hope that it is
a worthwhile connection,

human connection that I've made.

[music continues]

I know the story.

In this version of the story

or in all versions of
the story, he's bad.

Sexual harassment is bad,
toxic masculinity is bad,

but also the groupthink

that tears people's
identities away.

This idea of repenting,

that there's only one way
to live a life.

I hope that they walk away
just with a feeling.

I want you to hate Giovanni,
I want you to love him.

I want you to hate yourself
for loving him

and then I want you to feel bad.

Everyone.

I want society to feel bad

for stealing
Giovanni's identity.

[operatic singing]

A vibrant person.

[singing continues]

Who loves life, who has fun.

[singing continues]

I want them to feel.

[soft music]

[music continues]