Original subtitles

♪ It's not easy being me ♪

♪ Wash your face and brush your hair ♪

♪ Nag, nag, nag, it's just not fair ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry! ♪

♪ So down with school! I'm gonna rule! ♪

♪ And when I'm king, I'll do my thing ♪

♪ Then my life will be so sweet! ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry! ♪

♪ Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, ney ♪

♪ The Purple Hand Gang rules, OK! ♪

♪ It's so easy being me ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry! ♪

[Peter humming]

So, you see, I've got to make some serious money soon

otherwise I'm never going to achieve my dream

of owning every single Killer Boy Rat track

by the time I leave school.

Yep, that's gonna be a challenge, Henry.

Specially if you've got no pocket money for a week.

A month!

Ahh, yeah!

There's gotta be a way.

[Margaret] A way to do what?

Make some money.

Easy. Ask your parents.

Yeah, not so easy.

-And, anyway... -Yeah, anyway.

That doesn't make any sense.

[whistle blows]

[whistle blows]

Nooooooo!

So, when I say I need to make some serious money,

I mean, I need to make some serious money.

-[phone rings] -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That means I've got to make some serious money.

[Fang] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mum] Someone answer that phone, please.

Cos I really need every single Killer Boy Rat track.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Peter] I'll get it, Mum!

There's only 222 of them after all!

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

And that's not really a lot.

-[footsteps] -Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Peter panting]

It's for you, Henry.

Where's the phone, then?

Downstairs on the hall table, where else would it be?

Thanks, worm.

Don't call me worm, Henry.

It could be 223.

[dial tone]

[sighs]

Who was it?

-No one. -No one?

-I didn't get there in time. -Oh.

If I had a mobile phone then there would have been someone there!

Does that even make sense, Henry?

[phone rings]

Hello.

[Ralph] Take a look out of your window, Henry.

-You what? -Just take a look out of your window.

[sighs]

[crickets chirping]

There's someone in our garden.

Have they got a suitcase with them?

I don't know. I'll check.

Yes, they've got a suitcase with them.

Good, then they've arrived.

What d'you mean they've arrived? Who's arrived?

Our first guest, of course.

[Henry] First guest for what?

Hotel Horrid.

Hotel Horrid?

Yeah, it's rather a good name, don't you think?

Well, yes, if you're running a hotel,

-which I'm not. -You are now.

What are you talking about? You're not making any sense, Ralph.

I'm talking about making money, Henry.

Everyone's doing it nowadays.

Renting out their spare rooms.

-We haven't got a spare room. -Exactly.

Which is why you're renting out the Purple Hand fort.

Time to give them a big horrid welcome then.

Alright, but you're coming with me.

[woman humming]

-They're humming "Rockstar!" -Cool!

Maybe it's a rock star in there?

-[laughs] -[woman] Hello?

Ralph! Get over here right now!

-What is it? -The guest,

it's Fizz Whizz McTizz.

Hope you don't mind.

The ad said I could check in anytime I liked.

Oh, no, it's cool.

-Really cool. -Yeah, really cool.

Is there a restroom?

A restroom?

You mean somewhere to rest?

[laughs] I mean a bathroom.

-Er, yes. -A bathroom.

Yeah, that would be cool.

-Yeah, cool. -Really cool.

Oh, yes, right, the bathroom.

Will you excuse us a minute?

The bathroom, Ralph!

That means the toilet! We haven't got a toilet.

Not in here we haven't.

Oh, no, no, we can't!

[TV chatter in the background]

[laughing]

[Mum] Just going to make a cup of tea.

[Dad] Come and see this!

Can I ask why we're tiptoeing about?

Erm, house rule.

Cool.

This is a disaster!

I thought it was going rather well.

He's going to guess what's going on and then we'll be in big trouble!

Who's going to guess what's going on?

And what kind of big trouble will you be in?

Hello, I'm Peter and you are?

[whispers] Fizz Whizz McTizz,

pleased to make your acquaintance, Peter.

Do I know you?

I don't know, do you?

Yes! Yes, I do.

You're the keyboard player from the Killer Boy Rats.

I am indeed.

Say, can I ask you something?

Of course, ask away.

Why aren't you whispering?

I don't know. Why are you whispering?

House rule.

Oh, I see.

Can you direct me back to the Hotel Horrid?

I think it's out the back door?

Oh, yes, of course.

Follow me.

I'll get the ones with the frilly bits that you like so much.

That's it! She's gonna see them now and it's over for me.

No more pocket money ever. No more pizzas ever.

-No more-- -[Mum] I couldn't find the ones

with the frilly bits but we do have a few of the ones with the chunky bits.

Where's Fizz Whizz McTizz?

In the fort or perhaps I should say,

in the Hotel Horrid,

where you can check in anytime you like.

What?

D'you wanna make money or not?

What are you doing?

Making a cup of tea.

What?

Come on, Henry. It's all about service, you know that.

Next thing you know it'll be an invitation to supper.

Who's coming to supper?

Fizz Whizz McTizz.

Oh, that's nice. I hope she likes carrot casserole.

Oh, I'm sure she does.

She?

Sure, I'm a girl.

Did you all think I was a boy?

Well, we kind of...

Assumed I was?

Well, yes, because...

Because?

Er, because...

Because I play the keyboards.

Well, yes.

Does it matter if I'm a boy or a girl?

I can still play a mean keyboard.

[playing keyboard]

Cool?

-Cool. -Cool.

Your tea, Miss McTizz.

Thank you, kind sir. What a nice surprise.

Welcome to the Hotel Horrid.

That carrot casserole was amazing Henry and Peter's mum.

Well, thank you, Fizz Whizz.

It's just an old recipe.

Well, I think that was the finest carrot casserole

I've eaten in a long time.

Now, who'd like to hear a song from our new album?

Cool!

♪ Get up, get down, be on your way ♪

♪ Have a goodbye any day ♪

♪ Stand up, grow up, slow right down ♪

♪ Homework now, smile, no frowns ♪

♪ So many people tell me what to do ♪

♪ I dunno if I'm me or you ♪

♪ Sometime all I hear is noise ♪

♪ All I want to do is play with my toys ♪

♪ Sometimes all I want to say is leave me alone, go away ♪

♪ That's when it's time to stop and think ♪

♪ That's when it's time to go away ♪

♪ Who do you want to be? ♪

♪ I want to be me ♪

♪ Who do you want to be? ♪

♪ I want to be me ♪

♪ Who do you want to be? ♪

♪ I want to be me ♪

♪ Who do you want to be ♪

♪ I want to be me ♪

[cheering]

[yawns]

If you'll excuse me.

I think I need to get some shut eye now.

Of course, where are you staying tonight?

Er, the Hotel Horrid.

I don't think so, Fizz Whizz.

I think the Hotel Horrid's full tonight.

[snoring]

[owl hoots]

[both] Noooooooooooo!

[Peter] This is the story of a horrid big brother

and his perfect little brother.

And how the perfect little brother

helped the horrid big brother

in ways you could never imagine.

It all started

when Mum and Dad decided to have a romantical weekend away.

I went to stay with Great Aunt Greta.

And Henry ended up in the team

for the Brainbox of the Year competition.

Noooooooo!

[Peter] And so our story begins.

We need the worm, Henry.

He doesn't like being called worm.

Alright then, we need Peter.

I found out that in the final round

there's a question about the Wormicus Basicilus.

The Wormicus Basicilus?

Yes, The Wormicus Basilicus

del Mondo, to be precise.

Sound familiar?

Oh, er, I don't know.

-Should it sound familiar? -I don't know.

[sighs] Yes, it sounds familiar, only...

Only, you never listen to your little brother

when he's going on about it,

so you don't actually know anything about it.

Well, yes, how did you know I was going to say that?

I know a lot of things, Henry.

Just not a lot of things about the Wormicus

Basilicus del Mondo.

I mean, well, I'm just guessing, Margaret.

Just a wild guess. Not even a guess.

Really.

Who says we're going to get through to the final anyway?

Everyone gets through to the final.

It's Total Humiliation.

So, you don't get out of it by dropping out in an early round.

That sounds about right.

Phone home, Henry.

Why?

You need to speak to Peter.

Peter?

If you think he's going to help us, you've got another thing coming.

Eurgh. Don't start, Henry.

Just phone home!

[dial tone]

[Peter] Of course, there was no one at home.

Hello? Hello?

[Peter] Well, no one who could help Henry.

[phone music]

Maybe they've gone out shopping?

Try your mum's mobile then.

Erm...

She has got a mobile, hasn't she?

Well, yes...

[dialling]

-What did you bring that for? -[ringing]

I dunno.

[Peter] Mum wasn't answering her mobile.

No reply.

Then text her. Do I have to think of everything?

I'll do it.

Because, of course, I do have to think of everything, don't I?

[Peter] And Mum wasn't answering her texts either.

Eventually, the Ashton Adventurers

arrived at their destination.

Stuck Up Steve was welcoming as ever.

I'll need your mobiles.

[together] Yah, mobiles!

You what?

It's a rule of the competition that everyone hands in their mobile.

Oh, right, sure.

You'll be handing yours in then, too?

Oh, yah, we'll be handing ours in.

What about that lot?

[together] Yah, handing ours in.

I still don't believe you but here's mine.

Do I have a mobile phone?

No, I don't think so.

He doesn't have a mobile phone.

-I dunno. -He hasn't got one either.

And he definitely hasn't got one.

Can't believe you don't know that already.

There's a lot I don't know about Henry yet.

Yeah, well, don't hold your breath cos they're ain't a lot to know.

Says who, beetlebonce?

Says me,

says Soraya, says Gurinder,

says Susan.

The competition will take place tomorrow morning.

And may the best team win.

Says Miss Battle-Axe,

says Madame Tutu, says Greasy Greta, says...

Yeah, well, they're all girls, aren't they!

Er, what difference does it make if they're all girls.

I dunno.

Oh, I give up.

[knocking at the door]

Oh, it's you.

-Can't you see I'm busy? -Try your mum again.

Thought your phone was confiscated?

It was. This is my second one. Now dial.

[Peter] This time they did get hold of me.

But I wasn't ready to talk.

Just go away, Henry!

So, you handled that well.

It's not my fault.

It's always your fault, Henry.

Where are you going?

To get my beauty sleep.

[sighs]

[Peter] Later that night, when everyone was fast asleep,

somewhere in the house a phone started to ring.

[phone ringing]

Can you hear that phone?

Yeah, so can I.

Someone's got to answer that phone.

[phone ringing]

Just as well I don't go anywhere

without my trusty mobile, eh?

Funny place to keep your phone, if you ask me.

Mind how you go, these steps are quite steep.

[Peter] I couldn't believe it when Margaret answered the phone.

Hello?

I think that's for me.

OK, yah, so you got the question?

Yah, right, OK. Don’t be late. Or else.

Can I help you?

Well, yeah, you can.

You can start by telling me who that was?

Oh, but I'm afraid I can't.

Can't or won't?

Probably both.

Then, I suppose, you're not going to tell me

what question you were talking about, either?

Nope, I'm not. Now, if you'll excuse me.

No! If you'll excuse me!

Who do they think they are anyway?

I'm not an answer phone.

And if anyone thinks I am then they've got another thing coming!

[snoring]

[rooster crow]

Where am I?

Oh, yes,

the Brainbox of the Year competition.

-[rooster crows on Margaret's phone] -Oh, good, you're awake.

I'll see you downstairs.

Alright, fine.

[Peter] Now, this is where it gets interesting.

Here's what you might know already.

First, Henry got the answer wrong.

Then Stuck Up Steve revealed that

I was their mascot.

Then Henry got the answer right.

But have you ever wondered how Henry got the right answer?

This is what really happened.

[phone ringing]

[phone ringing]

Bogey brain, your bag, it's ringing.

Yeah, it's my mobile.

But they took your mobile! They took both your mobiles.

Then, it's my third mobile.

Who has three mobiles?

Looks like I do.

Well, aren't you going to answer it?

Hello?

-[whispers] Hello? -[Peter] Henry, it's me.

Peter? What are you doing over here?

You're over there.

Talking to Stuck Up Steve.

Yes, I'm over here

and I'm over there.

Now, I really am confused.

-How's it going? -Not good.

We don't know the answer and--

Yes, you do, Henry.

Yes, I do what?

You do know the answer, Henry.

You're just not listening properly.

Look, I'm not in the mood for riddles, OK?

And anyway, aren't you supposed to be giving Stuck Up Steve the answer?

Don't you worry. I'll give him an answer.

Just not necessarily the right one.

Oh, I see. I think.

Just listen, Henry.

Listen. Properly.

And so, farewell,

Wormicus Basilicus del Mondo,

The Empress of worms.

You're right! I do know the answer!

And that's the story of how a perfect little brother

helped a horrid big brother

win the Brainbox of the Year competition cup.

Thanks, by the way, worm.

You owe me bling time, Henry.

I know I do.

Just one question, perfect little brother.

Ask away, horrid big brother.

What made you change your mind?

Why did you decide to help me and not Stuck Up Steve?

Oh, that's easy,

because you're my big brother, of course!

[both laughing]