Original subtitles

♪ It's not easy being me ♪

♪ "Wash your face and brush your hair" ♪

♪ Nag, nag, nag It's just not fair ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry ♪

♪ So down with school I'm gonna rule ♪

♪ And when I'm king, I'll do my thing ♪

♪ Then my life would be so sweet ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry ♪

♪ Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, ney ♪

♪ The Purple Hand Gang rules, OK? ♪

♪ It's so easy being me ♪

♪ I'm Horrid Henry ♪

(rock music playing)

Trash, trash, trash the hornets.

Thrash, thrash, thrash the hornets. Trash, trash, trash the hornets.

Good work, Zero Zombies!

We're so gonna smash that gig!

- Sound good, don't they? - (music blasts)

Whose side are you on, Soraya?

Yours, of course. Doesn't stop them sounding good, though.

Come on. We've got some work to do.

Thrash hornets! Thrash, thrash hornets!

Are you coming or what?

(sighs) Coming, Margaret.

(rock music blasts)

I'm A Lady have got a sale on this week, and next week.

That's nice, dear.

It's more than nice.

They've got 50% off with 50% more off, if you buy in person instead of online.

That's very nice, dear.

Plus entertainment galore.

Well, that's my Friday afternoon taken care of, then.

(rock music blasts)

Great(!) Now we've got Thrash Hornets in stereo.

No snacks, Henry.

I'm cooking tea tonight.

But we need snacks!

It's hard work being the best band in Ashton.

You sure about that, Henry?

What, that it's hard work?

No. That you're the best band in Ashton.

(electric guitar riff plays)

What? That's Thrash Hornets!

We know.

But she can't do that!

Well, she is.

But...

No!

I want a word with you, bogey brain.

- Two words, don't you mean? - You what?

Two words, slugsnot.

Thrash and hornets.

(they giggle)

HENRY: That's three words.

MARGARET: You what?

HENRY: Three words. Thrash. And. Hornets.

You probably want to talk about Eggs on the Brain, too.

How do you know about that?

Listen, Henry, I know everything about what you're up to.

I know you've signed up to play on Best Band Day.

And I know...

Ahem.

Might I ask exactly what subject you're debating today?

Thrash Hornets, miss.

Thrash Hornets. I see. And that is...?

A song by the Killer Boy Rats, miss.

I see.

Miss Oddbod's office! Now!

BOTH: Yes, miss.

So, that's Thrash Hornets and Eggs on the Brain.

I'm guessing Fly Away Fandom's somewhere on your set list, too.

How did you know that?

Oh, just a lucky guess.

(growls)

Oh, no, not you two again.

BOTH: Yes, miss.

I really haven't got time for this now.

BOTH: Yes, miss.

You'll just have to take detention with Mr Soggington.

BOTH: Yes, miss.

Let me see.

After school tomorrow.

Mr Soggington's got an Extraordinary General Meeting

of the Goldfish Society tonight.

BOTH: Yes, miss.

Well, run along, then.

BOTH: Yes, miss.

- We want in, Henry. - What do you mean?

Me and the Zero Zombettes.

The Zero Zombettes?

My new band. The Zero Zombettes.

I play lead guitar.

Wait! I didn't know you played guitar.

I don't. I play air guitar.

No!

(chirps)

- (rock music blasts) - (caws)

(rock music continues)

Cool, Henry!

Bet old bogey brain can't play like that.

No way, Henry. She could never be as good as you.

- Catchy name, though. - What do you mean?

Zero Zombettes. It's cool.

Al!

Not cool?

No, not cool, Al.

Sounds too much like Zero Zombies for starters.

(sighs) And now I've got detention tomorrow afternoon.

Did you say tomorrow afternoon, Henry?

Yeah, but...

But the gig's tomorrow afternoon, Henry.

The gig's tomorrow afternoon.

The gig's tomorrow afternoon!

Oh, I knew there was a reason not to get detention tomorrow afternoon.

- What are we gonna do? - I dunno.

Not cool, Henry.

Don't worry Henry. We'll think of something.

We always do.

Eureka!

That's it!

- That's what, Henry? - Goldfish! That's what.

Goldfish, that's what, Henry?

Just goldfish, Ralph.

Goldfish are the answer.

Now, then, as you know detention

is something to be taken very seriously.

What is it, Henry?

Sir, I understand you are the President of the Royal Goldfish Society.

Why, yes, as a matter of fact I am.

So, you might be interested in this, sir.

- What are you up to, Henry? - Nothing.

You might like to try page 364, sir.

There's a really good article on how to teach a goldfish to dance.

Sir?

Get on with your detention, you horrid boy.

Henry!

I'm telling on you, Henry.

Unless you teach me to play air guitar.

What? You said you could play air guitar!

Well, I can't. Not really.

So show me how, or else.

(sighs) Alright, then.

You start like this.

How do I get myself into situations like this?

He's on his way. Honest he is.

Two seconds. You've got two seconds.

(pants) I'm here.

Cool, Henry.

- (pants) - You're cutting it fine Henry.

Had to teach bogey brain how to air-guitar.

Oh. Cool, Henry.

Not cool?

I haven't got all day.

Oh, I'm really sorry I'm so late.

Bogey brain tried to steal our set list and then--

Too much information. What's your band's name?

- The Zero Zombies. - MARGARET: And the Zombettes.

Didn't realize there were more of you.

There aren't.

But...

Pleased to meet you, sir.

My name is Margaret Millicent Maudita Smythe,

and my dad's just bought this department store.

Oh, right. And what do you play?

Lead air guitar.

- You said you played lead air guitar. - He does.

We're a double act. The best double act in Ashton.

Alright, then. Show me what you can do.

You heard the man. It's showtime, Henry!

Did your dad really just buy the department store?

No, but he was seriously thinking about it.

Thrash, thrash, thrash the hornets! Trash, trash, trash the hornets!

Thrash, thrash, thrash the hornets! Trash, trash, trash the hornets!

Hey, Mum!

Henry?

Thrash, thrash, thrash the hornets! Trash, trash, trash the hornets!

(wind whistles)

(snoring)

(clock ticks)

(snores)

(rings)

(stops ringing)

Can't you see I'm asleep?

(groans)

We're asleep.

Henry?

You know you'll have to shout.

I know, sweetie, but I promised myself

that on the first day of term I wouldn't shout.

Henry? Henry?

You know you'll have to shout.

I know.

Have you seen my tie anywhere?

Henry? Henry!

(rings)

What? I'm still sleeping.

Henry!

MUM: It's time for school!

School? It's a school day today?

Why didn't you tell me?

Alright, alright, I'm getting up.

Happy now?

It's no good. I've forgotten how to get up for school.

(meows)

Henry! Don't make me come up there!

I still can't find my tie.

(sighs)

(sniffs and meows)

(groans)

Who's a clever worm, then?

Cut the small talk, Henry. Hand her over.

It's a small price to pay for not doing your holiday homework.

There you are.

You've got 30 seconds to have breakfast, and get out of the house.

I still can't remember what I've done with my tie.

- PETER: It's here, Dad. - Well spotted, Peter!

Well spotted, Peter.

Don't be horrid, Henry!

Oh, fiddle-de-dum.

I promised I wouldn't say that on the first day of term, too.

Promises, promises.

Don't be horrid... (growls)

(Peter screams)

Look out, Dad!

What is it? What's the matter?

(chuckles) Oh, it was nothing.

- Dad scared away a spider. - Just a little one.

Oh, no, it was a really, really big one.

- It was this big! - (gasps)

You're so daring, Dad.

It was nothing, Peter. Run along, and have a good day at school.

Huh! Well, that's impossible!

Don't be...

- Off you go, too, Henry. - But...

No buts. It's time for school.

(sighs)

Same old, same old.

BOTH: Don't be...

Greetings, Lord High Majesty.

Greetings, Chief Lieutenant.

- Back to school. - Yeah, back to school.

- Wanna talk about it? - Nope.

- Just one question, Henry. - What is it, Ralph?

Why are you wearing your pajamas to school?

Oh, great. That's all I need.

(cackles)

Well, will you look at that?!

(yawns)

Like, yeah, look, Margaret.

What a slugsnot beetle brain!

Just ignore her.

(yawns) Like, yeah, ignore her, Margaret.

(yawns)

Forgot to get dressed, did you, bird brain?

- No. - No?

So, what do you call them, then?

My pajamas.

Like, yeah, pajamas, Margaret.

Yeah. So not your clothes, then.

No, they're my pajamas.

Yeah, well, then, you forgot to get dressed, didn't you?

No, I didn't.

I... Something happened this morning.

That I can't tell you about.

Oh, really?

Pull the other one, Henry!

But it's true!

(blows whistle)

Tell them, Peter.

Tell them what, Henry?

Henry, are those...?

Tell them about what happened this morning.

Well, Mum was yelling up the stairs, and...

No, later. The scary bit.

Oh, you mean...?

Yeah, the bit where Dad did his daring deed.

(gasps) Oh, yes, it was really big.

HENRY: Yeah, really, really big.

It was this big!

- It was that big. - (all gasp)

Yes, it was that big, and it was all hairy and had lots of legs and...

Really, Peter? Did you recognize the species?

Well, I think it was a tegenaria duellica.

Ooh, better hope it wasn't a tegenaria agrestis.

- Huh! You're making all that up! - No, really, Margaret...

It really was that big,

and Dad was so brave, I called him Daring Dad!

Then you would be well advised to back off, and go about your daily business,

as if you hadn't ever encountered it in the first place.

Excuse us. Gotta go.

I still don't believe you.

(yawns) Like, yeah, I believe you, Margaret.

Here, you're wearing your...

Tegenaria agrestis, sir.

Oh, right. Uh, you what?

Ah, Henry and Ralph, glad you could join us.

Get your holiday work out, please.

Phew! Looks like I got away with it.

Henry, why don't you start by telling us what you did in your holidays?

Yes, Miss Battle-Axe.

He's wearing his pajamas.

He's still wearing his pajamas.

"My holiday by Henry. I stayed in bed. A lot."

Well, go on, Henry.

Um, that's it.

Thanks, worm.

I see. Well...

Ask him why he's wearing his pajamas.

Oh, for goodness' sake, Margaret!

You can sit down, Henry.

Out of interest, why are you wearing those pajamas?

Well, here we are again.

- I'm not talking to you. - Yes, you are.

No, I'm not. And, anyway, this, as usual, is all your fault.

Well, that was a lot of not talking to me.

Ah, Henry.

Come on in.

He's wearing his pajamas, miss.

You, too, Margaret.

Now, then, Henry, what's this I hear about your father doing a daring deed?

How do you know about that?

Miss Lovely told me. Peter told her.

He does sound very brave.

Yes, miss.

Why don't you tell me what happened?

- What? - Well, miss...

Dad was getting himself ready for work.

Morning, brother dearest.

Good morning, brother dear.

Before we could get our breakfast, there was a knock on the door.

(knock on door)

Dad opened it, and it was then that we saw...

We didn't believe our eyes, but when Dad opened the door again...

(trumpets)

...Peter ran upstairs.

But I stayed to help Dad.

(chatters)

- Ready, Henry? - Ready, Dad!

BOTH: No!

And then they were gone.

That's funny, because I thought Miss Lovely said something about a spider.

Oh, yes, I forgot about the spider.

Oh, yes, the spider. Mustn't forget about the spider!

It was this big!

Yeah, yeah, we know. Tegenaria agrestis.

That's what the zoo said.

Why are you wearing your pajamas, Henry?

(rings)

Come on, Henry. Tell me about it over lunch.

I can't stand it when my tummy rumbles.

But you still haven't asked him

why he's wearing his pajamas, Miss Oddbod.

Well, I would have thought that's pretty obvious, isn't it?

Tell me again what the zoo said.

Was this a common phenomenon?

No!