Original subtitles

UH! HA HA!

♪ HOW YOU DO THAT THERE?

GIRL, YOU DONE FUCKED IT UP FOR ME.

I WAS GETTING MY HAIR DONE.

LISTEN, I DIDN'T MEAN TO MESS UP YOUR HAIR,

BUT BLUE SOLD ME A BAD DAMN TV.

WELL, SEE, FUCK THEM BALLERS.

SEE, I'M TRYING TO GET MY HEAD ON

BECAUSE YOU KNOW I GOT A DATE TONIGHT.

WHO YOU GOT A DATE WITH?

CLYDE.

CLYDE? WHY YOU GOING OUT WITH CLYDE?

HE'S STUPID.

CLYDE GOT A BIG DICK, SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.

YEAH, BUT, BESSIE, I THOUGHT YOU WAS A VIRGIN.

I AM A VIRGIN. I'VE BEEN A VIRGIN FOR 5 YEARS.

MATTER OF FACT, I'M TRYING TO GET MY GOLDEN PUSSY

SO I CAN RETIRE.

JUST COME ON AND HELP ME GET THIS TV FIXED.

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. WHERE THE FUCK YOU GET THIS CART FROM?

I THINK IT'S WORKING ALL RIGHT.

YEAH, OK. YOU RUN OVER MY CORN,

I'M PUTTING MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS,

AND YOU'LL SEE HOW GOOD IT WORKS.

I TOLD YOU TO GET THAT PEDIFURE.

IT'S PEDICURE, BITCH.

[TELEPHONE DIALING]YOU IS A--

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

["UNABLE TO CONNECT" TONE]

Man: ♪ FROM TEXAS TO ATLANTA, NIGGA, WE DON'T CARE ♪

♪ NIGGAZ HOLLA, HOW YOU DO THAT THERE ♪

♪ MISSOURI, OHIO, NIGGA, WE DON'T CARE ♪

♪ HOLLA, HOW YOU DO THAT THERE ♪

♪ D.C. TO THE VALLEY, NIGGA, WE DON'T CARE ♪

♪ WE IN THESE STREETS, ANYTHING GOES ♪

♪ MY COUSIN'S IN THE PEN HITTING THAT IRON GETTING SWOLL ♪

♪ SENT ME A LETTER SAYING P, GET YO PAPER ♪

♪ DON'T TRUST THESE HOS

♪ THESE NIGGAZ WILL TAKE YOU

♪ HUSTLING IS A HABIT

♪ CORNBREAD AND CABBAGE, POPCORN AND GRITS ♪

♪ NIGGA TRYING TO GET A RABBIT ♪

♪ WHAT ABOUT A NICE STALLION TO SLIDE IN ♪

♪ 20-INCH VOGUES AND SOME CANDY PAINTED TO RIDE IN ♪

♪ NIGGAZ FLIP CHANGE IN THE GAME 'CAUSE WE SOLDIERS ♪

♪ EYES EVER RED 'CAUSE A NIGGA BLOWING DOJA ♪

♪ TIE THE BLACK SHOW STRANGS TIGHT ON THE REEBOKS ♪

♪ GRAB YO SKI MASK, DKNY, I MEAN A PLASTIC GLOCK ♪

♪ HOS BOUNCE THAT ASS, NIGGAS GETTING DEALT WIT' ♪

♪ KEEP YO ENEMY TIGHT, NIGGA NEVER THANK QUICK ♪

♪ POUR OUT SOME LIQUOR TO THE HOMIES THAT I OWE ♪

♪ R.I.P. TO EVERY FUCKING RAPPER, THAT IS GONE ♪

♪ NIGGA IF YOU BOUT IT, SCREAM AND YOU SHOUT IT ♪

♪ IT AIN'T WHERE YOU FROM, EVERY NIGGA GET ROWDY ♪

DAMN, CARLA.

I DONE MISSED THE SOAP OPERAS,

THE TALK SHOWS, AND THE NEWS.

NO, BESSIE. I TURNED THE VCR ON.

BESSIE, WHAT YOU YOU GOT, YOUR MOTHERFUCKING TV?

OH, I'M SORRY. BESSIE, I DIDN'T KNOW.

YOU'S A SORRY ASS.

HURRY UP SO I CAN GO FINISH GETTING MY HAIR DONE.

IT'S GONNA LOOK REAL PRETTY WHEN IT'S FINISHED.

IT SHOULD HAVE LOOKED PRETTY RIGHT NOW. KEEP PUSHING.

WHY DON'T YOU ALL GET OUT OF THE FUCKING WAY?

MOVE.

LOOK OUT. SOMEBODY COMING THROUGH WITH A TV.

GET BACK!

MOVE!

[ENGINE REVVING]

OH, DAMN!

IF IT AIN'T THE GHETTO TWINS--UG AND LY.

Y'ALL GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE. WE'RE CLOSED.

AAH.

Carla: ...HAIR DONE IS WHAT YOU NEED.

Bessie: WELL, I WOULD HAVE GOT MY HAIR FINISHED

IF YOU WOULDN'T PAYING FOR YOUR BUSINESS.

"HELP ME. HELP ME. I CAN'T GET MY MONEY BACK."

Woman: SIGN HERE, THERE, AND THERE.

WE'LL NOTIFY YOU WITHIN 40 MINUTES

IF YOUR CREDIT HAS BEEN APPROVED, OK?

OK.

Bessie: ...ALL THE WAY UP YOUR MOTHERFUCKING ASS.

WHO'S THAT?

IT'S JUST NASTY MOUTH CARLA

AND HER SISTER BAD MOUTH BESSIE.

THEY'RE GOOD CUSTOMERS.

WELL, WHY SHE CURSE LIKE THAT?

THEM GIRLS ARE VICTIMS OF A CUSSING HOUSEHOLD.

EVERYTHING IS MOTHERFUCKER THIS, MOTHERFUCKER THAT,

AND THAT'S WHEN THEY IN CHURCH.

JESUS, JESUS, JESUS.

PRAY FOR THEM.

I WILL.

NO REFUND, MY ASS.

BLUE AND BLACK, SOMEBODY BETTER GIVE US BACK

OUR MOTHERFUCKING MONEY, OR YOU GONNA GET

YOUR MOTHERFUCKING ASS WHUPPED.

THAT'S RIGHT. SOMEBODY GONNA GET

THEIR MOTHERFUCKING ASS WHUPPED.

BLUE, HOW YOU GONNA SELL US THIS SAD-ASS TV?

DISAPPEAR, YOU BLIND MONKEY BITCHES

BEFORE I GET OUT MY "BITCH BEGONE" SPRAY AND SPRAY YOU.

BITCH BEGONE. BITCH BEGONE.

BUT I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.

IF YOU CAN TALK YOUR SISTER INTO

GIVING ME SOME OF THAT ASS,

MAYBE I'LL GIVE YOU A COUPLE OF DOLLARS.

YOU AIN'T NEVER GONNA GET NONE OF THIS SHIT.

ALL I NEED ARE 5 PUMPS.

MATTER OF FACT, GIVE ME 4.

I WOULDN'T EVEN NEED THE FIFTH ONE.

FIRST OF ALL, WHO ARE YOU CALLING

LITTLE PUNK BITCH, MOTHERFUCKER?

I GOT STRETCH MARKS BIGGER THAN YOU.

ANYWAY, YOUR GRANDMA'S A...

BITCH!

HA.

YOUR BREATH SMELL LIKE SHIT!

SITTING THERE LOOKING LIKE

WESLEY WHEN HE DID "TO WONG FU."

I'M GONNA BE PASSING A .56 ALL UP IN YOUR ASS

IF YOU DON'T GIVE US OUR MONEY BACK.

THAT'S NOT THE NAME OF THE MOVIE, BI--

YOU'S A DUMB, LITTLE, SHORT TWO-INCH BITCH.

YOU TALKING ABOUT MY HEIGHT OR YOUR DICK?

YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT BIG.

I SHOULD WHIP MY DICK OUT AND PUT IT UP YOUR ASS--

CAN I HAVE MY MONEY BACK?

Blue: SHOVE YOUR FINE ASS OUT OF HERE

BEFORE I SNATCH YOUR FUCKING WEED...

[ARGUING]

WHAT'S GOING ON? BLUE, MAN?

BITCHES, DAWG.

CAN'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING TO RUN A BUSINESS

AROUND HERE, DAWG?

Blue: FUCK THIS UGLY BITCH.

IT'S BUSINESS, BITCH.

WHAT'S UP, CARLA, BABE?

FUCK YOU, BUBBLES.

BLACK.

WHAT'S UP, BABY? YOU ALL RIGHT?

I WANT MY MOTHERFUCKING MONEY BACK.

NOW, YOU KNOW ALL SALES ARE FINAL, BABY.

BUT I HATE TO HAVE A DISSATISFIED CUSTOMER.

SINCE I'M SWEET ON YOU, I'M GONNA TELL YOU WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

DON'T FALL FOR THAT SHIT, BITCH.

TAKE THIS RAGGLY MOTHERFUCKER TO 122nd STREET

TO OUR REPAIR SHOP, TELL THEM YOU'RE ONE OF BLACK'S HONEYS,

AND THEY'RE GONNA FIX IT FOR YOU.

HOW WE GONNA CARRY THAT SHIT BACK TO 122nd STREET, BLACK?

Blue: PUT IT ON YOUR BACK.

Black: HOLD ON. HOLD ON, MAN.

CUSTOMER SERVICE, BABY.

CUSTOMER SERVICE, MY ASS. DAMN.

DON'T YOU WORRY, BABY.

I'LL PUT IT ON MY PERSONAL ACCOUNT, YOU HEARD ME?

MAKE SURE SHE DON'T HURT THAT THING

WHILE Y'ALL ARE GOING OVER THERE, HEAR?

CARLA.

HEY, FUCK THE 4 PUMPS.

JUST GIVE ME TWO PUMPS AND A GRIND.

HOLD ON. HOLD ON, BLUE, MAN.

YOU AIN'T GONNA NEVER GET NO COOCHIE LIKE THAT.

MAN, FUCK THAT, MAN.

WHY'D YOU SEND THEM OVER THERE TO OUR REPAIR SHOP, MAN?

EVERYBODY KNOW OUR GODDAMN POLICY.

NO REFUNDS.

YOU SCARED MR. MIMS GONNA FUCK BEFORE YOU?

HOW COME HE'S SUCH A MAC AND YOU AIN'T GOT NO GAME AT ALL, DAWG?

YOU KNOW WHAT, MAN? FORGET ABOUT IT.

I DON'T EVEN WANT TO START THAT SHIT NO MORE.

WHY YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT, DAWG?

YOU'S A PUNK ASS MOTHER. LEAVE IT ALONE, ALL RIGHT?

BOY, YOU GONNA MAKE ME WHUP YOUR ASS.

I'M GONNA TELL YOU SOMETHING, DAWG.

YOU RUN YOUR MOUTH TOO MUCH.

YOU LEARN TO CONTROL YOUR MOUTH,

YOU MIGHT FUCK BOTH OF THEM.

I DON'T WANT TO FUCK BOTH OF THEM.

I'LL FUCK CARLA, BUT THAT BESSIE-LOOKING BALD-HEADED UGLY BITCH,

I WOULDN'T FUCK HER IN--GODDAMN, IF I WAS ON PAROLE.

YEAH, RIGHT.

I WOULDN'T FUCK HER IN PUBLIC.

NOW, I CATCH THE BITCH LIKE LATE-NIGHT BY A DOGHOUSE,

OH, I'D TEAR THAT ASS UP.

RUFF! RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF!

YEAH, DAWG.

UGLY NAPPY-HAIRED FUCKER.

♪ MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE BREAD LIKE THIS ♪

♪ MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE BREAD LIKE THIS ♪

♪ MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE BREAD, MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE BREAD ♪

♪ MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE MAKE BREAD LIKE THIS ♪

♪ LET ME GIVE A SHOUT-OUT TO DEVO ♪

♪ GODDAMN NEIGHBORHOOD...

UH, EXCUSE ME.

I'M LOOKING FOR THE 9000 BUILDING,

A MR. GOLDSTEIN.

ALL THE NUMBERS SEEM TO BE MISSING AROUND HERE.

THEY SENT A GOLD MINE IN THE GHETTO.

SHIT. JUST LIKE REGINALD DENNY.

I WANT A REFUND.

NO. I CAN SAY NO IN A LOT OF DIFFERENT WAYS.

FRENCH--NO OUI OH. SPANISH--EL NO OH.

BABY TALK--UH-UH. BLACK PEOPLE--HELL, NO.

THIS IS THE 9000 BUILDING RIGHT HERE.

WHO ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?

MR. GOLDSTEIN.

THAT'S ME, BABY. I'M MR. GOLDSTEIN.

YOU'RE MR. GOLDSTEIN?

WHAT YOU SAYING THERE? YOU THOUGHT I WAS SAMMY OR WHOOPI OR SOMETHING?

OH, OH, NO.

YOU NEVER SEEN A BLACK MR. GOLDSTEIN?

Blue; OUT OF MY GODDAMN WAY.

Black: WHO YOU IS-- MISTER ROGERS?

NO. I'M SORRY.

LISTEN. UH, LOOK.

JUST, UH-- JUST SIGN THIS.

I'M SORRY I GOT LOST.

YOU KNOW, IF MY BOSS FOUND OUT,

I WOULD BE IN BIG SHIT.

I'M NOT GONNA LET YOUR BOSS FIND OUT.

IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.

I MEAN, THE KIDS BE CHANGING THE NUMBERS ON THE STREET.

OH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

Blue: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, MAN?

Driver: OH, IS THAT MR. GINSBERG?

NO, THAT'S MY LITTLE BROTHER LEROY GOLDSTEIN.

SAY IT. GOLDSTEIN. GOLDSTEIN.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?

ALL RIGHT. TH-THANK YOU. WHERE DO YOU WANT IT?

WHERE DO YOU WANT THEM, SIR?

HERE. LET ME GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO SHOW YOU.

OH, HELL, NO.

Driver: OH, THANK YOU, MR. GOLDSTEIN!

HURRY UP. PUT THEM PACKAGES RIGHT THERE.

RIGHT. YOU GOT IT.

Blue: YOU JUST GAVE AWAY OUR WHOLE DAY OF PROFITS, MAN.

CHILL OUT. GO CHECK ON THE BUSINESS, MAN.

NOBODY GONNA-- SHIT AIN'T WORTH--

GO CHECK ON THE BUSINESS, MAN.

SEE IF SOMEBODY'S STEALING OR SOMETHING OVER THERE.

ANYBODY STEALING? NO.

RIGHT HERE, SIR?

PUT IT RIGHT THERE.

ALL RIGHTY.

DON'T TRIP. I'M GONNA HANDLE THIS HERE, HEAR?

Blue: YOU JUST DONE GAVE ALL OUR MONEY TO BARNEY FIFE.

Black: MAN, CHILL OUT.

THANK YOU, SIR.

ALL RIGHT, MISTER ROGERS,

HURRY UP AND GET OUT OF HERE.

THERE ARE GANG-BANGERS AROUND HERE.

OH, MY.

YOU MIGHT GET JACKED.

YOU BETTER HURRY UP BACK TO MAYBERRY.

AND YOU KNOW, THEY'RE STILL MAD

ABOUT THAT RODNEY KING THING, TOO.

[ENGINE STARTS]

WHY THE FUCK YOU BUY ALL THESE BOXES?

YOU HOMELESS?

BECAUSE I GOT THE HOOK UP.

THE HOOK UP?

THE HOOK UP, BABY.

I'LL JUST OPEN THEM UP, AND I'M GONNA SHOW YOU

WHAT'S IN THERE.

HA HA. ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!

HELLO. HELLO!

WAIT A MINUTE. THESE GODDAMN THINGS DON'T EVEN WORK.

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW, BOY.

SAY HELLO TO THE FIRST WIRELESS CELLULAR PHONE CEO IN THE HOOD.

WE'RE GONNA HOOK EVERYBODY UP, BABY.

HOOK EVERYBODY UP?

HOW THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA GET

THESE THINGS HOOKED UP, MAN?

LITTLE BROTHER.

LITTLE BROTHER GOT A CHIP, BABY.

WE GONNA GET PAID, BLUE.

AIN'T GOT TO BE NO MORE HUSTLER NO MORE, BABY.

WELL, SHIT. MIGHT AS WELL GO FIND HIM.

YOU KNOW, I THINK HE OVER AT THE CHURCH

PAYING HIS RESPECTS TO BARRELHEAD.

WELL, I GUESS WE'RE GONNA PAY OUR RESPECTS, TOO.

RIGHT NOW. LET'S GO.

OK, LET'S PUT THESE IN THE CAR.

UH, BLACK.

WE AIN'T GOT A CAR.

OH, I FORGOT. LET'S GO PUT THEM IN THE SHOP.

AFTER WE GET FINISHED SLINGING THESE, BABY,

WE'RE GONNA HAVE MORE CARS IN A LITTLE BIT.

Bessie: DAMN. IT DON'T LOOK LIKE

NO MOTHERFUCKER'S EVER HERE.

SOMEBODY'S HERE BECAUSE BLACK WOULDN'T SEND ME

IF THERE WASN'T SOMEBODY WHO WAS GONNA FIX IT.

Both: HELLO!

HELLO!

HELLO!

HELLO! YOU GOT A MOTHERFUCKING CUSTOMER OUT HERE!

[MUSIC PLAYING]

WE'RE NOT OPEN TO THE PUBLIC, YOUNG LADY.

BLACK SENT ME HERE, AND HE TOLD ME TO TELL YOU

TO FIX THIS TV AND PUT IT ON HIS PERSONAL ACCOUNT.

BLACK SAID--OOH.

LOOK AT THIS PRETTY BLACK CHOCOLATE COOKIE HERE.

ALL THAT PRETTY HAIR AND GOLD ON TOP OF YOUR EYES

AND GOLD LIPS ON YOU.

WHOO. LOOK AT YOU NUBIAN GODDESS.

MR. MIMS, YOU DON'T SOUND LIKE NO TV REPAIRMAN TO ME.

I WAS WORKING IN THE BACK ON SOME TVs.

HERE'S ONE RIGHT HERE. WORKING ON A TV RIGHT HERE, SEE?

SHIT.

I HEARD ABOUT YOU, MAN.

FUCKING ALL THE YOUNG GIRLS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

YOU NEED TO GET AN OLD HO LIKE MYSELF,

A BITCH THAT CAN SUCK YOUR DICK

AND MAKE BISCUITS FROM SCRATCH.

YOU USE JOHNSON'S BAKING POWDER?

YEAH, AND THAT AIN'T THE ONLY THING I MAKE RISE.

OH, FINE-LOOKING THING, YOU.

MR. MIMS.

WHAT?

ARE YOU GONNA FIX THE TV?

YEAH. I CAN TELL WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE TV.

I CAN TELL FROM HERE.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT?

YOU NEED A TUBE.

A TUBE? A TUBE.

A SIMPLE TUBE. I'M GONNA GO IN THE BACK RIGHT NOW

AND CHECK OUT SOME TUBES.

I GOT SOME TUBES I WANT YOU TO CHECK OUT.

COME ON, CAT DAD.

YEAH. COME ON, BABY.

YOU'RE GOING TO GET A TUBE?

YEAH, A TUBE FOR THE TV. BE RIGHT BACK.

YOU'RE GONNA FIX THE TV?

FIX THE TV FOR YOU.

AND YOU'RE COMING BACK?

RIGHT AWAY.

RIGHT AWAY. OK.

Bessie: WHOO! GO, DADDY.

IT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE YOU'RE FIXING THE TV, MR. MIMS.

[INDISTINCT]

MR. MIMS, IT DON'T SOUND LIKE YOU'RE GETTING NO TUBE.

UH! YES, SHE IS. OH, SHE GETTING THE RIGHT TUBE, TOO,

THE RIGHT ONE. UH!

BESSIE, WHAT YOU EATING?

SHE'S EATING SOME BUTTER COOKIES.

FINE. I'M GONNA GO TAKE CARE OF THIS SHIT, BESSIE.

[BOTH BARKING]

♪ THIS IS FOR THE BURBANS AND THE CADILLACS ♪

♪ WITH THE 10s AND THE 12s BUMPING IN THE BACK ♪

♪ THIS IS FOR THE PLAYAS, HUSTLAS, PIMPS, AND MACS ♪

♪ WITH THE BENZES MAKING ENDS ♪

♪ I'M MAKING PAPER STACKS

♪ THIS IS FOR THE BURBANS AND THE CADILLACS ♪

♪ WITH THE 10s AND THE 12s BUMPING IN THE BACK ♪

[ORGAN PLAYING HYMN]

[SOB]

[DOOR CREAKS]

Man: HMM?

HMM? HMM?

WHAT Y'ALL LOOKING AT, HMM?

[INDISTINCT]

OLD BARRELHEAD. FINALLY GOT HIM, HUH?

Man: HUH!

WHAT'S UP, LITTLE BROTHER?

WHAT'S UP, BLACK? I'M SURPRISED TO SEE YOU HERE.

DIDN'T KNOW BARRELHEAD WAS ONE OF YOUR FAVORITE PEOPLE.

GUESS YOU REALLY DON'T KNOW ME LIKE YOU SHOULD.

WHAT'S UP, BLUE?

CHILLIN'.

BLESSED ARE THEY THAT MOURN,

FOR THEY SHALL BE COMFORTED.

Man: HE AIN'T GONNA FUCK WITH ME.

BLESSED ARE THE MEEK. THEY SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH.

...WACKO, BRO.

AND BLESSED ARE THE PEACEMAKERS...

...CRAZY CHECKING UP IN THE LOONY FARM, BRO.

THEY SHALL BE CALLED THE CHILDREN OF GOD.

THIS BITCH IS CRAZY.

AND OH, HOW WE NEED PEACEMAKERS

IN THIS WORLD TODAY.

I WISH HE'D JACK ME.

HE GONNA BE A DEAD OLD WHACKING MOTHERFUCKER

THAT THE GOVERNMENT DON'T HAVE TO GIVE ANOTHER--

HEY--

WHERE, WHERE, MAN? WHERE?

HA HA HA! YOU'RE BUT A COWARD, MY MAN.

WHY YOU PLAYING LIKE THAT?

Minister: NOW, AS I LOOK ABOUT THE CONGREGATION,

I NOTICE WE HAVE SOME PEOPLE HERE

COMMONLY REFERRED TO AS GANG BANGERS.

I HAVE A FEW WORDS FOR YOU.

[DOOR CREAKS]

Man: OH.

[CONGREGATION WHISPERING]

SAY--SAY, MAN, WHY EVERYBODY TURNING AROUND?

OH, SHIT, MAN.

IT'S THAT OLD BITCH MS. ROSE.

SHE SWORE THAT IF BARRELHEAD EVER DIED BEFORE SHE DID,

SHE'D SPIT IN HIS COFFIN.

AS A KID, BARRELHEAD DID SOME TERRIBLE THINGS.

HE ONCE BROKE INTO HER HOUSE, STOLE ALL THE APPLIANCES,

PISSED ON HER PORCH, AND SHIT IN HER HOUSE.

DAMN. WHAT DID HE HAVE-- DIARRHEA?

[INDISTINCT]

NOW CHECK THIS OUT.

SPIT ON HIS ASS, MS. ROSE.

SAY, MAN. SAVE YOUR SHIT.

CHECK THIS OUT, LITTLE BROTHER.

YOU STILL HAVE THEM CHIP CELLULAR PHONE HOOK UP?

NO TRIP, DAWG. I'M JUST ASKING YOU, YOU KNOW.

SO THAT'S WHAT THIS IS ABOUT, HUH?

MAN, I'M--

ALWAYS ABOUT BUSINESS.

I'M TALKING BIG BUCKS.

NO WHAMMIES! NO WHAMMIES.

IN THAT CASE, HERE'S MY CARD.

Ms. Rose: I'M GLAD THEY GOT YOU, BARRELHEAD.

YOU BIG-HEADED SON OF A BITCH!

OH, NO, YOU DIDN'T!

UH, NO, NO, NO! NO FIGHTING!

[GLASS BREAKS]

GOD WILL STRIKE YOU DOWN!

THE LORD'S GONNA GET YOU!

I'M GONNA GET YOU!

[SHOUTING]

[GLASS BREAKS]

Man: I USED TO BE A FIGHTER!

MAN, THAT BOY BARRELHEAD WAS A TRIP.

WHAT DID THAT FOOL DIE FROM ANYWAY?

THAT FOOL CHOKED ON A DRY BOX OF CORN FLAKES.

I BET IT WAS LIKE THAT COMMERCIAL, HUH?

WHAT COMMERCIAL?

GOT MILK?

[LAUGHS]

AAH!

BLUE, GET YOUR SCARED ASS OFF ME.

Blue: MAN, I WAS JUST PLAYING.

UH!

TIME TO GO TAKE CARE OF THE SOFTWARE, FOOL.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT?

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, BABY.

WHAT YOU--WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT, MAN?

[TELEPHONE RINGING]

Woman: OH, NOT THERE. THERE.

[CHUCKLES]

[SIGH]

WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?

Black: WHAT? LORRAINE, THIS IS BLACK, BABY.

BLACK, MY BABY! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOUR PHONE CALL.

6 MONTHS, NIGGA? BE REAL.

Blue: HEY, MAN, LET ME USE THE PHONE.

THIS GIRL JUST PAGED ME, MAN. 911.

WHO'S THAT WITH YOU? SOUNDS LIKE BLUE.

Black: THAT AIN'T NOBODY.

THAT'S SOME--SOME MAN WAITING,

TRYING TO GET THEIR PHONE.

OH, YOU'RE SUCH...

YOU'RE STILL MY BABY.

WHEN AM I GONNA SEE YOU AGAIN?

THAT'S WHAT I'M CALLING YOU ABOUT.

12:30 TOMORROW. LET'S DO LUNCH.

WHEREVER YOU WANT.

TELL HER I WANT TO GO, TOO.

I'M HUNGRY. I'M HUNGRY.

I'M GONNA NEED TO EAT. HUNGRY.

THE JAPANESE RESTAURANT BY THE LAKE.

I'LL BE THERE AT 12:29 IN MY RED DRESS,

HIGH HEELS, AND NO PANTIES.

NO PANTIES?

WELL, I'LL BE THERE WITH A BLACK SHIRT, BLACK HAT,

AND NO BOXING DRAWERS.

TELL HER I'LL HAVE ON SOME GYM SOCKS

AND A BACKSTAGE PASS FROM A KOOL MOE DEE CONCERT.

TELL HER I'LL BE IN SOME COWBOY BOOTS

WITH SOME CLICK-CLACKS AROUND MY NECK.

HEY, TELL HER I'M GONNA BE BUTT NAKED

WITH A BED ON AND A BEEPER

AND SOME BLUE BLOCKERS.

TELL HER I'M GONNA BE BUTT NAKED

WITH A BODY-- A--A RADIO STICKING OUT OF MY ASS

AND A GOLD NECKLACE

AND A CLASS RING.

TELL HER I'M GONNA BE ASSHOLE-NAKED

WITH SOME HANDCUFFS AND A WHIP.

AND A HULA SKIRT AND A SADDLE ON MY BACK.

I'M GONNA CALL YOU LATER, ALL RIGHT?

I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW, BABE.

AND A HAT.

YOU SEE I'M ON THE DAMN PHONE?

MAN, YOU KNOW YOU LOSING YOUR MIND OVER THAT GIRL, MAN.

SHE GOT YOU TELLING ME I'M NOT BLUE AND YOU NOT BLACK.

WHO THE HELL ARE WE?

[GONG SOUNDS]

WHAT'S UP, BABY? YOU'RE LOOKING GOOD.

MMM. IS THAT YOUR CELL PHONE IN YOUR POCKET,

OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME?

BOTH.

SPEAKING ABOUT A CELLULAR PHONE,

YOU STILL HAVE THAT CELLULAR PHONE JOB?

HAVE A SEAT.

I'VE NEVER BEEN IN NO CHINESE RESTAURANT.

HOW YOU DO THIS?

LOOK AT YOU.

THERE YOU GO.

LIKE THAT?

YEAH.

I AIN'T ABOUT TO TAKE MY SHOES OFF.

OK. DON'T TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF.

I KNOW WHAT THESE IS.

WILL YOU JUST STOP IT?

YOU STILL AT THE CELLULAR PHONE COMPANY?

YES, I AM, AND I'M STILL CATCHING CRIMINALS.

I KNOW A CRIMINAL WHO NEED A FAVOR.

WHAT ARE YOU GETTING AT?

I'M JUST SAYING THAT, UH...

MY BOY CAME UP ON SOME CELLULAR PHONES,

AND I'M TRYING TO HELP HIM.

YEAH. I HOPE YOU'RE NOT, LIKE, THINKING

ABOUT CLONING FREQUENCIES.

WE PUT PEOPLE AWAY FOR THAT STUFF EVERY DAY.

NAH. I WOULDN'T DO NOTHING LIKE THAT.

I JUST NEED SOMEBODY LIKE YOU ON THE INSIDE

TO LOOK OUT FOR US.

ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?

LOOK, I CAN LOSE MY JOB.

YOU KNOW, I GOT SUPERVISORS ALL UP IN MY SHIT.

WHERE WOULD YOU GET THE PHONES FROM ANYWAY?

IT'S LEGIT. STOP TRIPPIN'.

YEAH, ALL RIGHT. YOUR ASS CAN GO TO THE PEN FOR THAT SHIT.

I AIN'T GOING NOWHERE

TILL THEY GET ME SOME CHEESEBURGERS.

CHEESEBURGER? CHEESEBURGER?

CHEESEBURGER?

HEY, STOP.

YOU.

YOU KNOW I WOULDN'T HOOK YOU UP LIKE THAT, BABY.

BESIDES, I GOT TOO MUCH LOVE FOR YOU

AND I AIN'T TAKING NO FOR AN ANSWER.

MAYBE WE CAN WORK SOMETHING OUT.

THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING.

TUESDAYS AND SATURDAYS AT 8:00 SHARP.

WEAR THAT COLOGNE I GOT YOU FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY,

AND BRING THAT CHOCOLATE TOPPING THAT HARDENS

AND YOUR SONS OF FUNK PUSHING INSIDE

SLOW JAM CD.

WAIT A MINUTE.

YOU'RE SAYING TUESDAYS AND SATURDAY.

YEAH.

YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT TWICE A WEEK.

YOU HAVING SECOND THOUGHTS?

ANYTHING FOR YOU, BABY.

YEAH.

BECAUSE YOU GOT THE CANDY

AND I GOT THE HOOK UP.

YEAH.

MMM. MMM.

[CELL PHONE RINGING]

ALL RIGHT, WE'RE COMING OUT.

WE'RE OPEN FOR BUSINESS.

CELL PHONES, PAGERS, AND ALL THAT OTHER STUFF.

Y'ALL STEP ON UP AND SEE WHAT YOU WANT.

WHAT'S UP? YOUR HAIR LOOK LIKE TACO MEAT.

HEY, BABY, YOU'RE GORGEOUS. ALL RIGHT.

TUPAC. ALL RIGHT, COME ON IN, BABY. COME ON IN.

HEY, JANE, HOW YOU DOING, GIRL?

LOOKS GOOD. ALL RIGHT, BOY. TAKE A LOOK.

YOU CAN CALL NAIROBI ON THIS WHEN I GET THROUGH.

ASIA.

THE FEE WILL BE SO HIGH, THEY WON'T KNOW WHO TO CHARGE IT TO.

PUT YOUR OWN ASS OVER HERE.

LOOK. LITTLE BROTHER GONNA HOOK HIM UP.

YOU WANT ONE, TOO?

NOW PUT THAT ON YOUR HEAD.

I AIN'T GOT NO MORE GHERI CURLS. THIS IS THE LAST ONE.

HEY! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY GODDAMN TRUCK.

Y'ALL ARE UP HERE. STAY AWAY.

CAN'T EVEN GET A FUCKING LUNCH BREAK AROUND HERE.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

HOLD ON.

Woman: IS MINE READY?

Man: ♪ HOOK IT UP, I'VE GOT THE HOOK UP ♪

♪ HOOK IT UP, I'VE GOT THE HOOK UP ♪

♪ HOOK IT UP, I'VE GOT THE HOOKUP ♪

TURN AROUND AND LET ME SEE YOU.

WHAT YOU GOT THERE IN YOUR HAND?

A SLIP? OH.

TAKE THIS FLIP PHONE.

IT'LL WORK FOREVER IF YOU CALL ME EVERY DAY.

Man: ♪ DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT A THING ♪

♪ 'CAUSE WE GOT SUPER WHEELS

PERFECT.

IF THESE...

OLD-ASS CHIPS DON'T WORK IN THESE NEW PHONES,

BLACK GONNA BE MADDER THAN A MOTHERFUCKER.

♪ YOU WANT THE HOOK UP?

[BELL RINGS]

YO, UH, AFTER YOU MAKE THAT DEPOSIT,

COME BACK OVER HERE.

THINGS ARE GOING KIND OF GOOD.

I NEED YOU TO PICK UP SOME MORE MONEY, ALL RIGHT?

OOH, LORD, IT'S HOT. WHERE YOU ALL AT?

I GOT TO HAVE A PHONE.

I'D BETTER GET SOME FUCKING CREDIT

FROM BLACK AND BLUE ASS.

WHERE YOU AT, SISTER?

I THOUGHT I HEARD YOUR MOUTH.

WHAT'S HAPPENING, LOLA MAE?

OH, NOTHING.

NOW, GIRL, I NEED CREDIT.

UH-HUH.

WELL, I GOT TO HAVE A CELLULAR

TO TAKE CARE OF MY BUSINESS.

NO, NO, NO.

LOLA, YOU KNOW HOW THOSE NIGGAS ARE

WHEN THEY GET OUT OF JAIL.

WHO'S THE FIRST PERSON THEY CALL?

TOOTSIE PIE.

THE FIRST PERSON THEY CALL.

TOOTSIE PIE.

RIGHT, BABY.

THEY WANT SOME JAILHOUSE PUSSY.

HA HA HA!

NOW, YOU KNOW YOUR OWN MAMA WON'T GIVE YOU CREDIT,

SO WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I CAN DO ANYTHING FOR YOU?

THAT'S WHY HER ASS IS AT HOME IN THE CLOSET.

BE GOOD.

ME AND MY BIG MOUTH GETTING ME BUSTED FOR MAMA ABUSE.

THOUGH I WOULD LOVE TO GO TO JAIL, THOUGH.

BECAUSE YOU WANT TO DROP SOME?

MM-HMM.

BENDING OVER, PICKING IT UP.

CALL THE COP, BECAUSE I AIN'T GONNA STOP IT!

EXCUSE ME, BUT COULD I GET SOME FUCKING SERVICE HERE?

BABY, I'LL GIVE YOU SOME SERVICE. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

DON'T YOU TOUCH ME.

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

OOH, I LOVE THAT FOREIGN LANGUAGE.

BOY, THAT SHOPPING CENTER SURE DRAWN

A WHOLE BUNCH OF UNDESIRABLES AROUND HERE.

MHH-HMM.

MAMA GIRL?

HEY, MAMA GIRL, I NEED SOME MONEY.

DOESN'T MEANT THAT I AIN'T GOT SHIT FOR YOU.

I NEED SOME MONEY, MAMA GIRL. COME ON.

PLEASE. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I'LL DO.

I'LL LICK YOUR WRINKLED ASS PUSSY FOR $2.00.

I GOT WARTS FROM THE LAST TIME

I LET YOU HAVE TWO--TWO DOLLARS.

OH, SHIT. I WAS DOING YOU A FAVOR.

WELL, FUCK YOU.

SHIT.

GET ON OUT OF HERE!

CHECK WHAT WE GOT HERE.

MAN, THIS IS A GOOD ONE, TOO. LOOK AT THAT.

AH, YOU LIKE THAT?

GIVE ME MINE.

LITTLE MAN. GO AHEAD, NOW. GO AHEAD.

HERE, YOU CAN HAVE THAT. PHONE COVER.

Black: HERE I GO, SWEETCAKES.

HALF-HOUR LATE AS USUAL.

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER, YOU HEARD?

YEAH. CANDY MUSCLES ARE GONNA HAVE TO WORK DOUBLE-TIME TONIGHT.

YOU KNOW I'M ABOUT DEAD.

HOPE YOU BROUGHT THAT CHOCOLATE SAUCE.

MM-HMM.

YEAH.

YOU BRUNG YOUR SWEETS, RIGHT?

MMM.

[BEEPING]

YO!

YO!

YO!

HURRY UP.

HURRY UP, BOY. YOU'RE GOING TOO SLOW, MAN.

COME ON. COME ON. COME ON.

I CAN'T KEEP UP WITH THEM.

HEY, TAKE IT EASY WITH THOSE.

HEY, TAKE IT EASY WITH THOSE.

THERE YOU GO.

Black: IT'S ALL ABOUT BLACK AND BLUE

IN THE PROJECTS, BABY.

ENTREPRENEURS IN THE GHETTO, YOU HEARD?

THANK YOU, MR. GOLDSTEIN.

OF COURSE I'M DELETING THE FILES.

ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE, LISTEN UP.

THERE APPEARS TO BE A GLITCH IN THE COMPUTER SYSTEM.

OR MAYBE NOT.

YOU SEE, OUR DEPARTMENT

IS THE ONLY ONE AFFECTED.

NOW, I DON'T KNOW IF THERE REALLY IS A SURGE

IN THE UNAUTHORIZED TRAFFIC ON THE SOUTH SIDE,

BUT I'LL TELL YOU ONE THING, PEOPLE--

I INTEND TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF IT.

NOW, I'M GONNA START A FIELD INVESTIGATION,

AND I EXPECT YOU PEOPLE TO STAY ON YOUR Ps AND Qs

BECAUSE I'LL BE WATCHING EACH ONE OF YOU.

UNDERSTAND?

LORRAINE.

STOP THE PERSONAL CALLS.

WE'RE HERE TO WORK, NOT SOCIALIZE.

THIS AIN'T NO REGULAR PHONE.

SEE THAT MENU?

RIGHT THERE. Y'ALL SEE THAT?

ALL RIGHT. Y'ALL CAN ORDER STUFF.

LET ME HAVE ONE HAMBURGER, ONE FRIES.

RIGHT THERE, ME AND YOU.

SEE THAT "IN"? YOU CAN SEE THAT "SENT."

KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

IT MEANS SENT.

SEND Y'ALL AWAY. Y'ALL DON'T WANT TO SPEND NO MONEY.

Y'ALL GO. COME BACK TOMORROW.

NOBODY HERE.

I AM TIRED OF DOING ALL THIS STUFF MYSELF.

NOW YOU CAN CALL ME, YOU HEARD?

OH!

HEY, MAN, YOU KNOW WHAT?

WE--WE NEED SOME HELP.

I'M TIRED, DAWG, BUT WE GOT TO EXPAND THIS BUSINESS

SOME KIND OF WAY.

THE THING WE NEED TO DO IS GET SOME MORE RUNNERS.

YOU KNOW WHAT, MAN? MY COUSIN, MAN.

YOU KNOW, FAT ASS.

HE CAN COME OVER HERE AND HELP US.

THINK WE CAN TRUST YOUR COUSIN, DAWG?

BRO, THESE ARE PHONES. THIS AIN'T FOOD.

BESIDES, MAN, HE NEED TO EXERCISE.

Man: 6 MONTHS FREE ACTIVATION.

HEY, I CAN HOOK IT UP.

LET A BROTHER KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING.

HEY, WHAT'S HAPPENING?

ALL RIGHT, CHECK IT OUT.

THIS FOR 100, THIS FOR 150.

GO AROUND THAT WAY, BRO, LIKE THAT.

I GOT FREE ACTIVATION FOR YOU STRAIGHT UP, JUST LIKE THIS.

WHATEVER YOU WANT. IN 6 MONTHS, YOU CAN HAVE IT.

HERE'S MY BABY.

BIG BUSINESSMAN.

POOKIE, WE'RE SO PROUD OF YOU, SUGAR.

OH, GRANDMA.

SAY, COULD YOU LAY 1,000 ON GRANDMA, OK?

COME ON NOW, GRANDMA.

I JUST GAVE YOU $1,000 WHAT, TWO DAYS AGO?

WELL, WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?

I HAD TO GET MY HAIR FIXED AND MY NAILS.

SHIT, YOU WANT ME TO STYLE, DON'T YOU?

SHIT. WHAT THE-- WELL, THANK YOU, BABY.

THANK YOU, MY ASS.

YOU PAY ME THAT BACK WHEN YOU GET YOUR CHECK.

LISTEN, I RAISED YOU. NOW DON'T COME TALKING BACK TO ME,

OR I'LL WHIP YOUR BUNS,

LITTLE OLD SWEET THANG.

YOU WAS A BOOBY.

MMM.

BYE NOW.

BYE.

BE COOL. ALL RIGHT.

117 NUMBERS IN ONE DAY?

I'M GONNA BE HERE FOREVER.

HEY, WHAT UP?

HEY.

HOW YOU DOING? BEAUTIFUL DAY, HUH?

HEY, NICE PHONE.

WHERE'D YOU GET THAT?

DID YOU GET THAT BACK HERE IN THE SHOP OR SOMETHING?

YOU KNOW BLACK AND BLUE?

YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE I COULD--

YOU GOT A PHONE?

DO YOU KNOW BLACK AND BLUE?

I MEAN, THEY OWN THIS PLACE.

[NO AUDIO]

SEE? SEE? THE PHONE.

YOU KNOW THE BROTHERS? YOU KNOW THE BROTHERS?

YOU KNOW WHERE I COULD FIND THE GUYS?

ALL I'M ASKING, MAN, DO YOU KNOW BLACK AND BLUE?

THEY RUN THE, UH...

YEAH, RIGHT.

[BEEPING]

OK, BLACK AND BLUE. CELL PHONE HOOKUP.

SEE HOW YOU WORK.

HELLO. I WANT $40 WORTH OF SMOKE.

WHAT?

[STATIC]

[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

I BEEN GETTING IT FROM YOU FOR WEEKS.

YOU MEAN YOU'RE GOING TO--WHAT?

I CAN'T HEAR SHIT. WHAT--WHO--

[STATIC]

AAH!

THE PHONE'S ALL FUCKED UP.

WHAT?

YOU GOT ANY REEFER?

WHO IS THIS?

WHO THE HELL YOU THINK I AM?

I DON'T KNOW YOU.

I BEEN GETTING IT FROM YOU FOR THE LOAN,

AND YOU BETTER GET ME SOME SMOKE, MAN.

I'M NOT CALLING YOU.

DON'T YOU TALK TO ME IF YOU AIN'T GOT NO REEFER, MAN.

OH, YEAH? WELL, FUCK YOU.

WELL, FUCK YOU, TOO.

EAT SHIT, TOO.

I GOT A DIAL PHONE.

I GOT TO PUSH AUTOMATIC DIAL.

AAH!

I GOT PHONES FOR SALE. WHAT'S HAPPENING?

WHAT'S UP, MAN? I GOT CELLULAR PHONES.

GIVE ME 10. THEY'RE FOR ROSCOE.

ROSCOE?

DID I STUTTER, YOU BIG FAT-ASS PUNK?

IT-- HEY.

GIVE ME YOUR TOP OF THE LINE.

NONE OF THAT CHEAP STUFF YOU BEEN SELLING ON THE STREET.

IS--IS YOUR MONEY GOOD?

YOU OUGHT TO SLAP YOURSELF ASKING THAT QUESTION.

SLAP YOURSELF.

MR.--MR. T LAY--

HARDER.

HARDER!

NOW GET MY PHONE!

COME ON. HURRY UP!

OK, MR. T-LAY. OK. OK. OK.

COME ON. OVER HERE.

DON'T TOUCH MY CAR, FOOL.

HELLO. MY MAMA WANT HER MONEY BACK.

I'M NOT GONNA GIVE YOU THE MONEY BACK.

YOU DONE ATE ONE OF THE PIG FEET.

NO, WE DIDN'T.

LOOK HERE. I GOT A MAGIC LAMP.

TELL YOUR MAMA SHE GOT TO RUB THIS

EVERY WEDNESDAY AT 3:42 STANDING ON ONE LEG

WITH AL GREEN IN THE BACKGROUND.

HER MONEY WILL POP OUT.

AND TELL HER TO TELL YOUR DADDY

TO BUY YOU ANOTHER SHIRT.

HELLO! HELLO!

GIVE US SOMETHING TO EAT, BABY.

I'M CLOSED. I'M CLOSED. WE CLOSED.

I'M HUNGRY, BLUE. COME ON, MAN.

HERE YOU GO. HERE'S PIG FEET.

I DON'T WANT NO MOTHERFUCKING PIG FEET.

MAN, GIVE ME SOMETHING TO EAT.

TOMATO SAUCE.

I DON'T WANT NO MOTHERFUCKING TOMATO SAUCE.

COME ON, BLUE, MAN.

YOU KNOW I AIN'T ATE IN A WEEK.

[BOTH TALKING]

...SHOES ON MY DAMN FEET.

GIVE ME SOMETHING TO EAT. GIVE ME SOMETHING TO EAT.

FUCKER, HERE'S A MAGIC WAND.

YOU TAKE IT, RUB IT.

WHATEVER YOU WISH FOR, IT'LL COME TRUE.

OH, SO Y'ALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANT TO BE FUNNY.

LISTEN UP, MOTHERFUCKERS.

I SWEAR I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF.

BLACK, GIVE ME $5.00.

MAN-- YOU BETTER GIVE ME $5.00,

OR I SWEAR I'LL KILL MYSELF.

I'M POKING, MOTHERFUCKER.

DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE?

YOU BETTER GIVE ME $5.00. COME HERE.

I'LL KILL ME AND THIS BITCH.

POKE, POKE, POKE.

LET THAT MOTHERFUCKER GO.

LET HER GO. LET HER GO.

MOTHERFUCKER, I'LL KILL MYSELF, MAN.

COME ON, BLACK, MAN. GIVE ME $3.00, MAN.

THIS MOTHERFUCKER'S CRAZY.

MAN, I'LL KISS THE TIP OF YOUR SHOE.

GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

HEY, HEY, HEY! GET OUT OF HERE.

GET UP OUT OF HERE.

MY FOOT'S FUCKED UP.

DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO GET OUT?

DON'T LET THIS CRAZY MOTHERFUCKER

IN THE STORE EVER AGAIN.

YOU'LL KISS IT FOR 50 CENTS.

GET YOUR--

I AIN'T HAD NONE IN A WHILE, NIGGA.

Women: ♪ WE DON'T CARE IF THE PARTY DON'T STOP ♪

Man: ANDREW! TURN THAT DAMN BOX OFF, BOY!

ANDREW, LISTEN TO YOUR FATHER.

TAKE A BATH FIRST.

NOW, SON, LOOK UNDER THE CABINET

AND GET THAT HOLY ANOINTING OIL

FROM THE HOME BAPTISM KIT,

GET YOU A CUP OF LAUNDRY DETERGENT.

YOU'VE GOT TO PURGE THE BODY OF UNCLEANLINESS

BEFORE YOUR BIBLE STUDY.

Father: PRAISE THE LORD.

Mother: SATAN KNOWS WHAT'S DIRTY INSIDE.

MAKE SURE YOU SCRUB REAL GOOD UNDER YOUR LITTLE PEANUTS.

OF COURSE, MAMA.

Woman: ♪ YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T RESIST ♪

♪ SO LET YOUR HEAD KNOCK BACK AND LOOK FORWARD TO THIS, MISS ♪

♪ BIGGEST MAMA WITH THE DRAMA AND THE PRADA ♪

♪ PLATINUM REGATTA AND MY ICE JUST GOTTA ♪

HA! WE WITH IT WITH BIG BOY

DOING IT AT THE FRONT HERE.

WE GOT IT GOING ON RIGHT HERE AT 106.

WE'RE HAVING CHEER. UH!

YEAH, WE DO IT OUT HERE. WE'RE RIGHT QUICK.

IT'S KIND OF TIGHT. I'M FEELING IT TODAY.

Women: ♪ BUT TONIGHT I JUST WANT TO SET THE PARTY ON TOP ♪

♪ WIT' P AND THE ILL NA NA, THE UNIFIED HIP HOP ♪

♪ MO' CHEDDA AS LONG AS THE PARTY DON'T STOP ♪

♪ WE DON'T CARE IF THE PARTY DON'T STOP ♪

♪ GOT NOTHING BUT TIME SO LET THE BEAT KNOCK POP ♪

THAT'S MY JOINT RIGHT THERE. YO.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

YEAH, YO, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK

AFTER THIS, Y'ALL, UP TILL MIDNIGHT.

[SCARY MUSIC PLAYING]

Blue: MAN, FOR AN UGLY MOTHERFUCKER,

T-LAY SURE KEEPS SOME TIGHT HOS WITH HIM.

MAN, YOU'RE TRIPPING ON SOME HOS.

YOU NEED TO BE WORRYING ABOUT OUR PAPER.

OH, NIGGA, I GOTS MONEY.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

HOLD ON A SECOND.

HEY, WHAT'S UP, BITCH?

[GIBBERISH]

WHAT IS THAT?

WHOEVER'S ON THIS PHONE I'M TALKING TO

IS A BITCH.

Man: BETTER WATCH HOW THE FUCK YOU TALK TO ME.

T-Lay: THE ONLY PERSON I'M COOL WITH IS ROSCOE,

AND EVERYBODY ELSE IS BITCHING.

WHO THE FUCK YOU THINK THIS IS?

OH, ROSCOE, I'M SORRY, MAN.

I DIDN'T KNOW THAT WAS YOU.

HEY, MAN, I'M THE BITCH.

Roscoe: YOU MUST HAVE GOT A WRONG CONNECTION,

BECAUSE YOU CALLED THE WRONG PERSON BITCH, BITCH.

YOU MUST HAVE GOT A FUCKED-UP CELL PHONE OR SOMETHING.

Black: YOU HEAR THAT STUPID SHIT THEY'RE PLAYING ON THE RADIO?

MAN, THAT SOUND LIKE ROSCOE.

Roscoe: BOY, WE GOT A DROP COMING IN.

70 GRAND. YOU GOT IT GOING ON.

HOMEBOY SAID SOMETHING ABOUT 70 GRAND.

Roscoe: 4 PACES, UP 7 ROWS BACK, TOP LOCKER.

DON'T FORGET. YOU BETTER HURRY UP BECAUSE I'M GOING.

Woman: ROWS BACK. THE DUDE SAID 7 ROWS BACK.

IF YOUR MAMA HAD TAUGHT YOU HOW TO CLEAN

THE GODDAMN WAX OUT OF YOUR EAR,

MAYBE YOU COULD HEAR.

BITCH, NOBODY TALKS ABOUT BIG MAMA. YOU'RE LUCKY.

YOU'RE LUCKY YOU'RE IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE.

REMIND ME WHEN WE GET HOME TO WHUP YOUR ASS.

I'M GONNA WHUP YOUR MOTHERFUCKING ASS.

YEAH, YEAH. ANYWAY.

I'M NOT GOING NOPLACE BEING NAKED.

THAT'S CRAZY, MAN. GET OFF OF ME.

MAN, YOU HEAR WHAT THE FUCK IS ON THE RADIO?

DON'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING TO HANDLE MY FUCKING BUSINESS?

MAN, DON'T EXPECT ME TO EXPLAIN THAT SHIT TO ROSCOE.

I'M TALKING TO ROSCOE.

YOU NEED TO TELL HIM SHIT FUCKED UP.

WE CAN HEAR YOU ON THE RADIO.

HEY, ROSCOE.

GONNA HAVE TWO FUCKED-UP. HEAR ME, T-LAY?

HEY, DAWG. SHH. I WANT YOU TO SLOW YOUR ROLL, MAN.

EVERYBODY CAN HEAR US.

MAN, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF THE PRESIDENT CAN HEAR ME.

YOU BETTER TAKE CARE OF MY 70 GRAND,

OR YOU'LL TAKE ONE OF THEM LONG TRIPS OVER THE CONSTRUCTION YARD, BOY.

ROSCOE?

[CLICK]

RRRR.

[SHOUTING]

[TIRES SCREECH]

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Blue: YEAH.

HEY, BLUE. HEY, MAN, WE GOT PROBLEMS.

WHO IS THIS? FAT ASS? WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WE'VE PROBABLY SET OFF THE BIGGEST TREASURE HUNT

SINCE THE GOLD RUSH, MAN.

HEY, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

T-LAY'S CONVERSATION GOT OUT WITH ROSCOE

ON POWER 106 TODAY.

IT'S THEM RAGGEDY-ASS CELL PHONES.

ROSCOE TOLD T-LAY TO PICK UP 70 GRAND

IN AN UNGUARDED LOCKER.

Blue: WHERE?

HE DIDN'T SAY.

PEOPLE ARE PROBABLY LOOKING EVERYWHERE.

Blue: SHIT, MAN. ME AND BLACK'S ASS GONNA BE IN TROUBLE.

[SHOUTING]

DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, DAMN!

4 PACES IN, TOP LOCKER.

HOLY SHIT.

YEAH, YEAH. YEAH, ROSCOE, YEAH.

BLACK AND BLUE ARE DEAD MEAT.

I PROMISE I'LL PERSONALLY TAKE CARE OF IT.

I'M GONNA PUT THEM TO SLEEP FOREVER.

Roscoe: DON'T MAKE ME MAKE AN EXAMPLE OUT OF YOU, T-LAY.

HEY, DAWG, IF YOU GONNA HIT THE BAG, HIT IT!

UH!

YES.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

OOH!

HI, CANDY MUSCLE.

WHAT'S UP, CANDY LORRAINE?

UH UH UH UH UH. NOT SO FAST.

I WANT TO SAVOR EACH AND EVERY MOMENT.

I THOUGHT YOU WAS READY.

MM-HMM. RED OR WHITE WINE?

RED LIKE YOUR PRETTY LIPS.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

WHO THE HELL IS THAT?

ARE YOU EXPECTING SOMEBODY?

NO.

BLACK?

IT'S BLUE.

WELL, OPEN THE DOOR.

FUCK, NO.

STOP TRIPPIN'.

WHAT'S UP, DAWG?

YO, DAWG, WE GOT TO DISAPPEAR.

NOW, CANDY MUSCLE'S NOT LEAVING. A DEAL IS A DEAL.

FUCK THAT, MAN. ROSCOE GOT A CONTRACT OUT ON US.

LET'S GO.

HOLD ON, MAN. WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT-- CONTRACT?

THE CELL PHONE, THE 70 GRAND.

POWER 106 PLAYED IT ON THE RADIO.

EVERYBODY HEARD IT.

MAN, YOU SURE YOUR MIND AIN'T PLAYING TRICKS ON YOU, DAWG?

DO I LOOK LIKE BUSHWICK?

HEY, WAIT A MINUTE. THAT'S A WHOLE NOTHER THING NOW.

OVER THE RADIO? THIS COULD BRING IN THE FCC

AND WHO KNOWS WHAT ELSE?

Black: Y'ALL SLOW DOWN. THIS SHIT AIN'T THAT SERIOUS YET.

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S UP.

Blue: RIGHT. WE GOT TO LAY LOW SOMEWHERE

FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

I'VE GOT IT COVERED.

[BEEP]

[WHIRRING]

OH, SHIT.

WRONG ONE. SORRY, GUYS.

WHAT?

YOU AND I WILL DEAL WITH THAT LATER.

YEAH, WE SURE IS GONNA HANDLE THIS LATER.

THAT GODDAMN GIRL IS A FREAK.

YOU NASTY PERVERT.

I'M GONNA OPEN THIS AGAIN.

WAS THAT CHOCOLATE-- DID I SEE DEVIL'S CHOCOLATE?

WHAT IS THIS? A BAT CAVE?

YEAH. THIS IS HOW I FOUND OUT ABOUT YOU AND WHAT'S HER NAME.

YEAH, RIGHT.

OH, SHIT.

MY OFFICE ORDERED A SEARCH ON HIS FILES.

I KNEW MY BOSS WAS GETTING SUSPICIOUS.

THE BOY'S BEEN CRAWLING UP MY ASS.

CAN'T YOU JUST ERASE EVERYTHING

AND TURN THE PHONES OFF

SO IT WON'T COME BACK TO US?

NOW, HOLD ON, BLUE.

IF SHE DO THAT, IT'S GONNA GET RID OF ALL OUR CUSTOMERS.

WE CAN'T DO THAT.

IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT. IT'S NOT POSSIBLE.

WE NEED TO FIND LITTLE BROTHER

AND GET THAT BLACK BOX.

MAN, FORGET LITTLE BROTHER.

WE NEED TO CHILL OUT.

LOOK, LET ME HANDLE THIS HERE,

AND YOU GET READY FOR ME.

AND YOU GET READY FOR THE COUCH.

COUCH. I AIN'T SLEEPING ON NO COUCH.

I'M SLEEPING IN THE BED WITH HER.

WHAT?

I SAID I NEED A PILLOW FOR THE COUCH.

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.

YOU KNOW YOUR CANDY MUSCLE HERE FOR YOU.

HMM.

YOU JUST KEEP DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

[CHUCKLES]

AND I'M GONNA BE RIGHT THERE IN THE BED WAITING ON YOU.

Blue: WE AIN'T GOT TIME FOR THAT SHIT.

LET'S GO. WE GOT TO GET SOME SLEEP, MAN.

SHE AIN'T DOING NOTHING BUT PLAYING YOU ANYWAY.

I'LL BE ON THE COUCH.

Man: ♪ YOU KNOW, I KNOW

♪ IT'S GONNA BE GOOD, GIRL

♪ I CAN FEEL YOUR WATER STREAMING DOWN ALL AROUND ♪

♪ HERE'S MY LOVE

♪ AM I QUALIFIED IN YOUR EYES?

♪ I CAN FEEL MYSELF DEEPER, DEEPER INSIDE ♪

♪ PUSHING IN YOUR BODY ♪

♪ OH, LAY YOU BY MY SIDE ♪

♪ I'LL LET YOU LIGHT MY FIRE ♪

♪ I CAN SEE IT IN YOUR EYES ♪

Blue: YEAH, BUT THEY GONNA PUT ME ON FRIES,

AND THAT'S WHEN I'LL BE STARTING TO MAKE THE BIG BUCKS.

MAN. UH-HUH.

I'M GONNA HOOK YOU UP WITH THAT TWO-PIECE DINNER

WHEN I GET OVER THERE.

SAY, BLUE? BLUE.

WHAT THE HELL? YOU WAS HAVING A NIGHTMARE OR A WET DREAM, FOOL.

WIPE YOUR FACE.

LET'S GO GET THAT BLACK BOX YOU WAS TALKING ABOUT, MAN.

Y'ALL DONE, MAN?

Black: YEAH.

DID YOU BLOW OUT THEM CANDLES?

BOY, YOU'RE A FOOL.

THINK THAT BITCH KNOW VOODOO OR SOMETHING, MAN.

Blue: BRO, WHAT WAS UP WITH YOU LAST NIGHT, MAN?

Black: MAN, STAY OUT OF MY BEDROOM.

DAWG, I HEARD YOU IN THE ROOM STRAIGHT CRYING LIKE A LITTLE BITCH.

"MAMA, SPANK ME!"

GIRL DID YOU LAST NIGHT, HUH?

THESE NUTS.

HA HA HA!

IF YOU WENT LOCKING THEM UP AND PUT HANDCUFFS ON BITCHES,

MAYBE THAT WOULD BE ENOUGH FOR A NIGGA.

Black: SO YOU'RE SAYING I'M HOGGING SOME BITCHES?

I'M SAYING YOU PLANT SEEDS ON A MOTHERFUCKER.

COME ON. I'LL KNOCK YOU OUT. COME ON.

YEAH. HUH?

AH! WAH! AH!

WHAT YOU GONNA DO?

GO AHEAD. GO AHEAD. GO AHEAD.

AAAH!

I'LL BEAT YOUR ASS.

AAH!

COME ON.

COME ON. HUH?

LET ME TIE MY SHOE UP. WAIT A MINUTE.

GET 'EM UP. GET 'EM UP.

GET UP. GET UP. GET UP.

Men: ♪ WE GOT WHAT YOU NEED

♪ FROM HEROIN TO WEED

♪ BENZES TO ROVERS, HOOPTIES TO NOVAS ♪

♪ BEEPERS TO SPEAKERS

♪ PISTOLS TO BITCHES

♪ ALL ABOUT OUR FIGURES WITH THE HOOK UP FOR YOU NIGGAS ♪

♪ WE GOT WHAT YOU NEED

♪ FROM HEROIN TO WEED

♪ BENZES TO ROVERS...

WAH! WAH! WAH!

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. TAKE A LOOK. TAKE A LOOK.

AGH.

COME ON, BLUE.

AGH!

♪ THERE'S NO LIMIT TO THE SHIT I MOVE ♪

♪ FUCK IT, IF IT'S HOT

BITCH!

[SHOUTING]

YO, MR. MIMS?

OPEN THE DOOR!

[SHOUTING]

WHO IS IT?

US, MOTHERFUCKER!

IT'S BLACK AND BLUE!

NO, NO, NO. UH-UH.

COME ON, MR. MIMS!

GET AWAY FROM AROUND HERE.

COME ON, MAN. COME ON.

WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM, BOYS?

WE JUST GOT SHOT AT.

WELL, WHY DIDN'T YOU SHOOT BACK?

HEY, COME ON.

Blue: OPEN THE GODDAMN DOOR!

ALL RIGHT. NOW, Y'ALL GOT TO CALL.

WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL?

WE TRIED TO CALL, BUT OUR PHONES BROKE.

STAND RIGHT OVER THERE.

WHERE'D YOU GET ALL THESE GODDAMN

RAGGLY-ASS TVs?

FROM THE BACK OF YOUR DAMN VAN

OR WHEREVER YOU SELL THOSE DAMN TVs.

ALL THESE ARE FROM YOUR CUSTOMERS.

Blue: WHAT'S THAT I SMELL?

THERE ARE SOME RULES AND REGULATIONS IN HERE.

LISTEN TO ME.

Y'ALL STAY OUT OF MY BUSINESS, ALL RIGHT?

STAY OUT OF MY BUSINESS. LET'S GO.

...FUCKING?

I AIN'T FUCKING. WHAT YOU MEAN, FUCKING?

I HOPE YOUR ASS AIN'T HAVING NO FUN, BOY.

I'M HAVING A LOT OF FUN.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

A WHOLE LOT OF FUN. COME ON IN HERE.

Blue: OH, SHIT. THEY'RE NAKED!

WHOO! HA HA!

BITCH. GOT TO SHARE MY FUCKING PUSSY.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

OH, DAMN!

THIS MOTHERFUCKER BEEN HOLDING OUT.

OH. THERE'S MORE THAN TVs IN THIS MOTHERFUCKER HERE.

SHIT!

WE'RE IN PARADISE, BLUE.

IT'S LIKE TITTY HEAVEN.

WHY, THANK YOU.

BOY, YOUR UNCLE IS A PLAYER, PLAYER, PLAYER.

NOW THERE'S SOME RULES AND REGULATIONS IN HERE--HANDS OFF.

HANDS OFF? THE ONLY THING I AIN'T GONNA TOUCH

IS YOU TWO MOTHERFUCKERS.

YOU BETTER BE LUCKY WE CAME.

YOUR OLD ASS PROBABLY GONNA CATCH A HEART ATTACK.

LEAVE THEM PRETTY WOMEN ALONE!

ME AND BLUE PROBABLY GONNA SAVE YOUR LIFE.

SAVE MY LIFE? MY LIFE DON'T NEED SAVING.

I'VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR 20 YEARS.

YEAH. YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T GET IT UP LIKE YOU USED TO.

YES, I CAN.

I GOT A HARD-ON RIGHT NOW.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW THEY'VE BEEN DOGGING ME

ABOUT THIS CREDIT SHIT.

THAT'S OK. WE AIN'T LIKE SEARS.

BUT IF YOU DON'T PAY YOUR BILL WITH US,

WE BREAK IN YOUR HOUSE AND TAKE OUR SHIT BACK.

WELL, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TROUBLE GETTING IT.

NEXT!

HEY. WHAT'S UP? WHAT IT IS.

SORRY. WE ARE CLOSED.

AW, SUGAR SHORTS, WHY YOU WANT TO

TREAT A BROTHER LIKE THAT? CLOSED.

ALL I WANT TO KNOW IS

WHO'S IN CHARGE OF THESE CELLULAR PHONES?

BECAUSE I'M GONNA BRING THEM SOME BUSINESS,

YOU UNDERSTAND?

I'M TALKING ABOUT A LOT OF BUSINESS.

YOU SEE YOU? I DON'T LIKE

YOUR TWISTED-ASS KIND.

NOW WHY YOU WANT TO COME AT ME LIKE THAT?

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME, BABY.

OH, YES. I KNOW YOU.

YOU LOOK JUST LIKE THE SAME TWISTED-ASS

THAT HANDCUFFED ME 3 YEARS AGO.

UH! GET YOUR POLICE ASS UP AND STEP.

OH, YOU GONNA DUST ME?

STEP!

A-BEE-BA-DEE-- THAT'S ALL, FOLKS!

DAMN.

SHIT!

POLICE-ASS MOTHERFUCKER. HE GOT ME FUCKED UP

IF HE THINK I DON'T KNOW WHO HE IS.

BLACK AND BLUE, WHERE THE FUCK Y'ALL NIGGAS AT?

DON'T SAY A FUCKING THING.

HOW ELSE MAY I HELP YOU?

HEY. THIS IS AN ARMED ROBBERY.

GIVE IT UP, BITCH.

COME ON, RAINBOW BRITE. GIVE ME THIS MOTHERFUCKING MONEY.

HERE, NINJA TURTLE. HERE, HERE.

FUCK UP ALL IN MY FACE.

YOU THINK A MOTHERFUCKER PLAYING WITH YOU, HUH?

WHERE THE REST OF THE FUCKING MONEY AT?

WE GONNA DO THIS SHIT TILL YOU GET IT RIGHT.

YOU COST ME 70 GRAND.

I DIDN'T COST YOU A MOTHERFUCKING THING.

YOU NEED TO MAKE YOURSELF COST YOU A NEW EYE.

OH, THIS BITCH TALKING SHIT.

LET ME DO THIS, MAN. LET ME GO! LET ME DO IT.

SHUT THE FUCK UP!

IF I WAS A FUCKING NIGGA,

Y'ALL WOULDN'T BE DOING ME THIS,

YOU OLD FUCKING PUSSY-ASS NIGGAS.

Y'ALL MAKE ME SICK.

COME ON!

SCARY-ASS MOTHERFUCKERS,

I'M GONNA BRING THE PROJECT TO Y'ALL.

HURRY THE FUCK UP!FILL THAT BAG UP!

STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS, TAKE IT.

BUY YOURSELF A NEW EYE, YOU CRIPPLE-EYED BITCH.

FUCKING 6'5" MOTHERFUCKER GOT MY HEAD HURTING.

MM-HMM.

HEY, HEY, SAILOR.

YOU GOT A LIGHT?

UH, I THINK I DO.

SO, SAILOR, YOU LOOKING FOR A GOOD TIME?

WELL, ACTUALLY, I'M NOT A SAILOR.

I'M THE HEAD OF THE FRAUD DEPARTMENT AT CELLULAR TWO.

I'M CONDUCTING AN INVESTIGATION IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD,

TRYING TO GET INFORMATION ON THOSE CELLULAR PHONES

THAT HAVE BEEN GOING AROUND.

MORE LIKE CELLULAR WALKIE TALKIES

IF YOU ASK ME.

OOH. BABY, WAIT TILL I GET MY TALONS ON THAT BLACK AND BLUE.

BLACK AND BLUE, HUH?

MM-HMM. AND THAT LORRAINE.

LORRAINE FROM CELLULAR TWO?

OH, NO.

DID I GET THEM IN TROUBLE?

THIS IS TERRIBLE.

ME AND MY BIG MOUTH.

NO, NO, NO, NO. THAT'S OK.

THIS IS JUST A PRELIMINARY INVESTIGATION.

BESIDES, I NEVER GIVE UP MY SOURCES.

YOU'RE SO BRAVE.

HEH HEH. NOT REALLY.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME...

YOU BIG--HMM-- STRONG MAN?

DALTON. WHAT'S YOURS?

WELL, EVERYBODY AROUND HERE CALLS ME...

TOOTSIE...POP...

BECAUSE BY THE TIME THEY GET TO MY SWEET CENTER,

NOBODY KNOWS HOW MANY LICKS IT TOOK TO GET THERE.

TOOTSIE POP. THAT'S PRETTY.

YOU WANT TO GO SOMEWHERE AND HAVE A TALK?

OK.

YOU'RE A BIG GIRL.

HA HA! YOU LIKE THAT, HUH?

HA HA HA!

OH. THIS JUST AIN'T MY DAY AT ALL.

HEY. I GOT A HEADACHE FROM MY PHONE.

AND WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT?

WHERE ARE THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS, HUH?

I GOT YOUR MOTHERFUCKERS. I GOT YOUR MOTHERFUCKERS RIGHT HERE,

YOU LITTLE TACO!

!¡ARRIBA! !ARRIBA! !¡AÁNDALE! !¡AÁNDALE!

SHIT!

AAH! AAH!

[GUNSHOTS]

!¡AÁNDALE!

BITCH-ASS FOOL!

I'LL PUT YOUR MOTHERFUCKING TIRES OUT.

LORRAINE, MY OFFICE NOW.

CLOSE THE DOOR!

LOOK. I CAN EXPLAIN.

LOOK. I'VE BEEN TO THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

I KNOW WHAT WENT ON.

THIS IS A FEDERAL OFFENSE, LORRAINE.

I TRUSTED YOU!

HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO THE COMPANY, HUH?

YOU'RE FIRED!

FINE.

I'M GONNA FIND YOU, BLACK AND BLUE.

IT SURE IS HARD BEING A BUSINESSMAN.

K.C. and the Sunshine Band: ♪ I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN

♪ THAT'S WHAT I AM

♪ I'M HERE TO

♪ DO WHATEVER I CAN

♪ BE IT EARLY MORNING

♪ LATE AFTERNOON

♪ I WANT TO BE YOUR

♪ BE YOUR RUBBER BALL

♪ I WANT TO BE THE ONE

♪ YOU LOVE MOST OF ALL

♪ OH, YEAH

♪ I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN, I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN ♪

♪ TURN ME ON

♪ I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN, I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN ♪

♪ DO WHAT YOU WANT

♪ I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN, I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN ♪

♪ TURN ME ON

♪ I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN, I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN ♪

♪ DO WHAT YOU WANT

♪ I'M YOUR BOOGIE MAN

♪ THAT'S WHAT I AM...

BLACK AND BLUE.

WHY THEY CALL YOU BLACK?

SHIT, NIGGA. BECAUSE I GOT

THE SWEETEST BERRIES IN THE GHETTO.

AND WHY DO THEY CALL HIM BLUE?

GIRL, BECAUSE HE LIKE TO WEAR BLUE.

YOU AIN'T GOT TO BE NO ROCKET SCIENTISTS TO SEE THAT.

Blue: HEY, YO, MAN, I THINK THIS HIDING OUT

DONE TURNED OUT ALL RIGHT.

I'M FUCKING ONE OF THESE MOTHERFUCKERS

BEFORE I LEAVE.

♪ COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND

[POLICE RADIO SQUAWKING]

DAMN. IT'S A GHOST TOWN AROUND HERE.

WHERE EVERYBODY AT?

HEY. SHIT!

COME HERE.

WHAT YOU WANT, MAN?

WE WANT TO TALK TO YOU FOR A SEC.

WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S HAPPENING?

PUT YOUR HANDS UP. PUT YOUR HANDS UP.

WE'RE THE GOOD GUYS. CALM DOWN.

YEAH, RIGHT.

GOT ANY WEAPONS, MAN?

HEY, PARTNER. LOOK AT THIS.

AH. YOU THINK YOU'RE ABOVE THE LAW, HUH?

THAT AIN'T MINE.

BULLSHIT THAT AIN'T YOURS.

GIVE ME THAT HAND, MAN.

AIN'T A MILLION OF YOU NOW, HUH, MOTHERFUCKER.

WE GOT A PLACE FOR YOU.

I AIN'T DONE--LET'S GO.

WHERE THE HELL YOU THINK FAT BOY GOT THEM?

DAMN. MAMA GONNA KICK MY ASS.

THAT'S RIGHT.

Woman on radio: ALL AVAILABLE UNITS, PROCEED TO 7046 KREBS AVENUE.

WE HAVE A DOMESTIC DISTURBANCE AT THAT ADDRESS.

KREBS AVENUE? ISN'T THAT YOUR ADDRESS?

SHIT!

PROBABLY ALREADY FUCKING MY POPS.

SHUT UP, YOU CHUNKY MOTHERFUCKER!

MAN--MAN, RELAX-- RELAX, MAN.

SHIT FOR BRAINS. LET'S GO.

[SIREN]

LET'S GO!

COME ON. IT'S MY FUCKING WIFE IN THERE.

COME ON, COME ON.

GO!

[WOMAN MOANING]

OHH. HAVE MERCY ON ME.

HAVE MERCY ON ME. HAVE--

MARTHA!

IT'S NOT WHAT IT SEEMS, HONEY.

HONEY, IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.

SHE'S THE FREAK!

SWEETHEART.

HER! SHE'S THE FREAK!

WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON HERE, MAN?

SHUT UP, MAN. JUST SHUT UP!

YOU'RE ALL MINE, MAN.

FUCK YOU!

AAH!

AAH!

YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN A MAN.

YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN A MAN.

YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN A MAN.

AAH! AAH!

NICE TO FINALLY MEET YOU.

DAMN GUN'S JAMMED!

I GUESS I'LL KNOCK HIM OUT.

HA HA HA! HA HA HA!

[GUNSHOTS]

BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG!

[WOMEN LAUGHING]

THANK YOU, BABY. COME HERE.

BANG, BANG! BANG, BANG, BANG!

DRINK UP.

COME ON NOW. LET'S SEE.

YOU AIN'T GOT NOTHING LEFT BUT THEM LITTLE PANTIES.

7! 7! BLUE!

COME ON, BABY. TAKE THEM OFF.

TAKE THEM OFF.TAKE IT OFF.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

OH, SHIT!

Mims: WHO THE HELL IS THAT BANGING ON MY DAMN DOOR?

MAN, YOU TELL ANYONE WHERE WE WAS AT?

DAMN. I AIN'T TALKED TO ANYONE.

SHIT!

YOU GOT A THING UNDER THERE THAT'S GONNA GET COLD.

Lorraine: MR. MIMS, HELLO?

MR. MIMS?

BLACK, IS THAT YOU?

BLACK, I CAN SEE YOU. OPEN THE DOOR!

IS THAT YOU, HONEY LEGS?

WHAT YOU OUT THERE MAKING ALL THAT NOISE FOR?

COME IN, BABY.

IS THIS WHERE YOU BEEN ALL THIS TIME?

EVERYONE HAS BEEN WORRIED ABOUT YOU.

IT'S ALL GOOD, BABY. WHAT YOU TRIPPING ON?

Blue: OH, NOW, BABY! TAKE THAT SHIT OFF. TAKE IT OFF!

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?

THAT'S BLUE BACK THERE WATCHING ONE OF THOSE NASTY MOVIES.

COME ON. OH, YEAH?

WELL, YOU JUST BETTER TELL HIM

THAT HIS GRANDMOTHER WANTS ANOTHER GRAND,

AND WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR CELLULAR?

EVERYONE'S BEEN TRYING TO REACH YOU.

TAKE IT ALL OFF!

IT'S BROKE, BABY. COME HERE.

STOP TRIPPING.YEAH, I BET.

ANYWAYS, T-LAY ROBBED LOLA MAE,

AND ANDREW GOT ARRESTED,

AND I LOST--

YOU LOST WHAT?

I LOST MY JOB!

WHAT YOU TRIPPING ON?

I KNOW YOU'RE TRYING TO HIDE SOMETHING BACK THERE!

I DON'T HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.

YEAH, RIGHT!

WHAT YOU--

YEAH. BLACK, YOU MOTHERFUCKER,

I KNEW YOU HADN'T CHANGED!

Mims: YOU WASN'T INVITED IN HERE.

NEITHER WERE YOU!

WELL, CAN'T GET NO WORSER THAN THIS.

SHIT.

GENTLEMEN, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'RE AWARE

OF THE GRAVITY OF THIS SITUATION,

BUT THE VERY EXISTENCE OF AMERICA'S COMMUNICATION SYSTEM IS AT STAKE HERE.

UH, HAVE A SEAT, GENTLEMEN.

YES, SIR. THANK YOU, SIR.

NOW UNCLE DALTON-- DALTON HERE IS

WITH THE FRAUD DEPARTMENT OF CELLULAR TWO,

AND HIS INVESTIGATION HAS BEEN MOST HELPFUL.

I'D LIKE TO SAY THAT I'M VERY HAPPY TO BE OF ASSISTANCE.

AHEM. NOW--

AND THE INFORMATION HE'S PROVIDED

IS IN THE BRIEFS YOU'VE RECEIVED.

I WANT YOU TWO BOYS TO GO PICK UP LITTLE--

UM, I WANT TO GET THIS RIGHT--

UH, BRODER, LITTLE BRODER.

I WANT YOU TO INTERROGATE HIS BURGLARIZING ASS

TO THE Nth DEGREE.

NOW THESE TWO CHARACTERS...

BLACK AND BLUE,

WE SUSPECT THAT THEY ARE THE MASTER CRIMINALS

BEHIND ALL THIS,

BUT WE DON'T WANT TO ALERT THEM TO THE FACT THAT WE'RE ON TO THEM.

NOT JUST YET.

Man: THIS IS WHAT THE FBI's ALL ABOUT, JAMES,

HIGH-TECH SURVEILLANCE.

I LOVE IT.

HEY. HERE'S OUR MAN.

WHO THE FUCK ARE-- MAN, WHO THE FUCK ARE YA'LL?

MAN, WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU, MAN?

WHAT THE FUCK GOING ON, MAN?

TURN AROUND, TURN AROUND. STAY TURNED AROUND.

LET'S GO.

YOU ALWAYS FUCKING WITH A NIGGA, MAN.

WHAT I DO? I DIDN'T DO A FUCKING THING, MAN.

5 MORE MINUTES, AND I WOULD HAVE BEEN IN THERE

WAXING THAT ASS!

NIGGA, YOU COULD HAVE HAD 5 WEEKS--

[TIRES SQUEALING]

IT'S T-LAY AND HIS GANG. RUN!

[YELLING]

YO, 3 MORE!

COME ON, MAN! LET'S ROLL.

YEAH! WE BEHIND YOU, BOY!

BLUE, WHERE YOU AT?

OVER HERE!

GET THEM FUCKS, MOTHERFUCKER!

I GOT BLACK, I GOT BLACK.

COME ON! COME ON!

WHAT'S ALL THIS BULLSHIT?

Blue: HOLD ON. HOLD ON.

LOOK AT THAT, LOOK AT THAT. LOOK, LOOK.

OVER THERE. LOOK, LOOK.

HYAH! HYAH!

WHAT? YOU'RE NOT SCARED OF ME? I'M T-LAY, FOOL.

NO. I AIN'T SCARED OF YOU. COME ON.

YOU WANT SOME OF THIS HERE?

LET ME GO! AAH!

[YELLING]

LIKE THAT, HUH?

GET HIM. GET HIM, MAN!

MOTHERFUCKER, YOU GET HIM.

Black: Y'ALL WANT SOME, TOO?

WHAT'S HAPPENING? SAY WHAT YOU GONNA DO.

COME ON.

WOOOAAOW!

LOOK WHO THE FUCK BACK. OH, YOU WANT SOME MORE NOW?

YOU MOTHERFUCKERS WANT TO FIGHT?

I'LL FIGHT YOU.

HYAH! HYAH! HYAH!

HYAH! HYAH!

WHAT Y'ALL DOING?

[WHOOPING]

I'M GONNA BEAT YOUR LITTLE ASS.

AAH! AAH!

THIS WANT YOU WANT? HERE, HERE, HERE.

UNH!

DAMN. T-LAY DOWN.

PUNK BITCH!

OH, FUCK! T-LAY!

COME ON, MAN. STAND UP.

HE WHUPPED YOUR BIG ASS.

T-Lay: HEY, MAN. WHO WON?

NOT YOU, MOTHERFUCKER.

LISTEN, YOU LITTLE MOTHERFUCKER.

WE GOT YOUR GODDAMN FINGERPRINTS ON THAT CHECK!

JAMES, JAMES. JAMES!

UGH!

LOOK. UM, I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN CONSTRAIN HIM,

AND QUITE FRANKLY, I DON'T KNOW IF I WANT TO.

MAN, FUCK, BOTH OF Y'ALL.

I'M NOT TELLING YOU TWO DOUGHNUT-EATING

CRACKER MOTHERFUCKERS NOTHING!

FUCK YOU, PRICK!

JAMES!

OH, SHIT. UH-OH.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?

NO!

HUH?

OH, OH. UNH!

AT LEAST HE'S KNOCKED OUT.

IF YOU WOULD HAVE PUT THE MASK ON LIKE I TOLD YOU,

WE WOULDN'T HAVE THIS PROBLEM!

I PUT THE MASK ON EXACTLY THE WAY YOU TOLD ME.

YOU'RE THE ONE THAT FUCKED IT UP.

WELL, IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH A HOTHEAD!

I'M A HOT--I'M...

ERR!

YOU IDIOT! 10 YEARS IN THE SERVICE

IS ALL MESSED UP BECAUSE OF YOU!

I DIDN'T FUCK ANYTHING UP!

THIS WAS YOUR STUPID IDEA!

I KNEW THIS SHIT WOULDN'T WORK.

OHH!

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

NOTHING, NOTHING.

JUST A LITTLE SCUFFLE BETWEEN FRIENDS.

I GOT TO GET TO THE CARPOOL.

ALL RIGHT. BYE, SIR.

SHIT.

[GROANS]

OH, MY HEAD. SHIT.

Man: HEY, CAN I GET SOME ATTENTION IN HERE?

I NEED TO USE THE PHONE!

THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD. I SHALL NOT WANT.

GOD HELP US. HOLY FATHER.

BESIDE THE STILL WATERS.

HE RESTORES MY--OHH!

THOUGH I WALK THROUGH THE VALLEY...

THAT'S THE HOLY WORD.

I KNOW YOU'RE FAMILIAR WITH THAT.

FEAR NO EVIL.

THAT'S MY WALLET, AND I KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY I GOT, TOO.

THAT DEVIL ROD!

PREPARING THE TABLE BEFORE ME...

UH, THAT'S MY HOLY OIL FOR SATANIC SPIRITS.

LET ME HAVE THAT.

THAT'S FOR MY GLAUCOMA.

I HAVE A PRESCRIPTION FOR THAT.

NOW YOU DONE HAD MY PURSE LONG ENOUGH, HONEY.

GIVE IT HERE.

[BEEP]

WHERE'S MY SON?

MY SON BACK HERE.

I'M READY FOR THEM.

BACK UP, SATAN.

BIND YOU DOWN TO THE LAKE OF FIRE.

I'M NOT SCARED OF THEM,

NONE OF THEM.

DISAPPEAR, DEMONS, ALL OF YOU.

CRACK CREATURES. LOOK AT THEM.

BITCH, I'M CRAZY!

YOU MAMA!

THROW YOU DOWN IN THAT DEEP, DARK PIT

FOR A THOUSAND YEARS.

BIND YOU DOWN!

DISAPPEAR, DEMONS!

I GOT TO SPRINKLE ALL OF YOU,

ALL OF YOU.

CHAKA KHAN, CHAKA KHAN!

GET AWAY FROM MY BOY!

THAT'S MY BABY.

WHAT'S THE DEACON GONNA THINK, HOWARD?

I'LL NEVER GET THAT MOTHER OF THE YEAR AWARD.

PROBABLY GIVE IT TO SISTER WANDA AGAIN.

THAT BITCH.

SHIT. OHH.

Andrew: MAMA, WATCH OUT FOR LITTLE BROTHER.

OHH!

YOUR FATHER AND I HAVE DECIDED

TO INCREASE YOUR BIBLE STUDY

TO 8 TIMES A WEEK,

AND YOU WILL NO LONGER BE ALLOWED

TO GO BACK FOR SECONDS ON THE COMMUNION CRACKERS.

OH, MAMA.

OH, I AIN'T THROUGH YET.

YOU WILL POLISH ALL THE DEACON'S FURNITURE,

AND YOU ARE GROUNDED TO YOUR ROOM.

FOR--FOR HOW LONG?

YOU AIN'T COMING OUT!

BETTY, HOLD ALL MY CALLS.

I GIVE YOU TWO AN ASSIGNMENT,

A SIMPLE ASSIGNMENT,

AND WHAT DO I GET?

A SUSPECT LOST IN THE INTERROGATION ROOM,

AND YOU TWO NOWHERE TO BE FOUND.

YOU TWO HAVE ONE MORE CHANCE.

YES, SIR.

THAT WILL BE ALL, GENTLEMEN.

AND NO MORE SCREW-UPS!

HOW YOU DO THAT THERE.

SO, BLACK.WHAT, MAN?

EITHER YOU AND BLUE STUPID,

OR Y'ALL GOT TO BE THE CRAZIEST NIGGAS I KNOW

IF YOU THINK YOU'RE JUST GONNA WALK UP IN ROSCOE'S SPOT

AND PUT THE MATCH DOWN,

AIN'T GONNA BE NO PROBLEM.

MAN, DID I ASK FOR A SPEECH, DAWG?

I JUST NEED SOME GUNS.

YOUR MONEY, YOUR LIFE.

SHIT. THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

GOT THE GUN AND THE KEYS TO OUR RIDE.

HA HA HA! THAT AIN'T YOU.

WHAT?THAT AIN'T YOU.

WHERE OUR SHIT AT THEN?

HE'S SITTING ON IT RIGHT HERE.

OH. HOLD ON, DAWG.

MAN, YOU GOT TO BE BULLSHITTING.

THIS AIN'T OUR RAGGEDY-ASS PIECE OF SHIT.

DON'T TRIP. WE GONNA HANDLE THIS.

HA HA.FOR REAL.

LOOK, HOMIE. ON 30 MINUTES' NOTICE,

YOU GET THIS.

YOU WANT THE HOOK UP, GIVE ME TWO HOURS,

AND I'LL GET YOU SOMETHING LIKE THIS.

TOLD YOU WE SHOULD HAVE CALLED

THAT MOTHERFUCKER EARLIER.

HEY, DAWG. LET ME GO WITH YOU, MAN.

LET'S GO, DAWG.

FUCKER, YOU GONNA TRIP, HUH?

YOU GONNA FUCKING TRIP.

YOU FAT, ICE CUBE-LOOKING MOTHERFUCKER.

SAY, DAWG. COME OVER HERE

BEFORE YOU GET YOUR ASS SHOT, NIGGA.

FUCK THAT, MAN. YOU THINK THIS SHIT GONNA WORK, MAN?

YEAH. HERE.

YOU EVER SEE ONE OF THOSE BEFORE?

NIGGA, YOU JUST KEEP THE DAMN CAR RUNNING

WHILE I GO IN HERE AND HANDLE MY BUSINESS.

♪ I TOLD YOU, NIGGAS, DON'T MAKE THE MAN ♪

♪ NIGGAS, THE MAN MAKE THE GREEN ♪

♪ SEE, ME AND "P" AND "C," NIGGA ♪

♪ WE SERVING ALL THESE FIENDS ♪

♪ AIN'T NO SUCH THING AS NIGGAS BEING HALFWAY SHOOK ♪

♪ I'M A MOTHERFUCKING KILLER

♪ I HANG WITH CONVICTS AND CROOKS ♪

♪ MAN MAKE THE MONEY, THE MONEY DON'T MAKE THE MAN ♪

♪ YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT TO, WHAT YOU WANT TO DO? ♪

♪ NIGGA, LET'S DANCE

♪ OKLAHOMA, NIGGA

♪ KANSAS NIGGAS DOWN TO DANCE ♪

♪ ALL ABOUT MY GREEN, NIGGA

♪ ALL ABOUT MY PAPER

♪ ON TOP, WHEN WE STOP

♪ TILL I CALL SHOTS FROM A SKYSCRAPER ♪

♪ SEE, I DON'T GANGBANG, GET MY BANG ON ♪

♪ SO BRING IT ON...

BLACK, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

NIGGAS IS LOOKING FOR YOU UP IN THIS PIECE, B.

GET ME A DRINK. SHIT.

WHAT YOU WANT?

I NEED TO TALK TO ROSCOE.

YOU WANT TO TALK TO ROSCOE?

OK. I'M SURE HE'LL TALK TO YOU

RIGHT BEFORE HE KILL YOUR ASS.

SO YOU DIDN'T WANT THE HOOK UP?

NO, BABY. YOU KNOW WE DON'T LOVE THEM HOS, NIGGA.

WE TREAT THEM BITCHES LIKE THIS BLUNT, NIGGA--

PUFF, PUFF, PASS, NIGGA.

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT, MAN.

PUT YOUR MONEY WHERE YOUR MOUTH AT.

8 BALL IN THE CORNER POCKET.

SAY, PLAYER, I GOT NEXT, MAN.

LET'S DOUBLE THIS BET A "G" A GAME.

"G" A GAME? WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM?

A "G"? I GOT A "G" ON SOME WEED, NIGGA.

THERE YOU GO, PLAYER.

Roscoe: WHO THE FUCK THIS IS, MAN?

THIS BETTER BE MONEY TALKING.

THIS BLACK, ROSCOE.

BLACK, YOU GOT SOME KIND OF FUCKING NERVE

TO SHOW UP IN MY CLUB.

YOU MUST GOT ALL MY MONEY.

SHIT.

THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT, DAWG.

THAT WASN'T MY FAULT,

BUT YOU AIN'T THE ONLY CRAZY MOTHERFUCKER OUT HERE.

I GOT A BOMB IN MY SACK.

IF YOU DON'T ACT RIGHT,

I'M GONNA BLOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER UP.

WE ALL GOING TONIGHT, DAWG.

I'M TIRED OF FUCKING RUNNING AND HIDING.

THOSE TWO CRIMINALS

IN THAT TITTY BAR HAVING A GOOD TIME.

FOR YOU TO BE COMING AT ME LIKE THIS HERE,

IT MUST BE INVOLVED WITH 70 GRAND PLUS INTEREST

FOR ME TO GIVE YOU YOUR LIFE.

IF YOU CAN GET PAST THAT SHIT,

I GOT A DEAL FOR YOU.

YOU KNOW I GOT THIS CELLULAR PHONE COMPANY.

I COULD SHOW YOU HOW TO MAKE WAY MORE MONEY

THAN ANY OF THESE MOTHERFUCKERS THAT YOU FUCKING WITH NOW.

YOU KNOW, I'M THE MAN ON THE STREET.

I GOT THE INSIDE CONNECTION, THE BLACK BOX.

WE COULD HOOK THIS UP.

ALL I NEED YOU TO DO IS GET T-LAY AND THEM OFF MY ASS.

ME AND BLUE GONNA HANDLE THIS.

WE COULD RUN THE STREETS WITH THIS SHIT,

AND I'LL CUT YOU IN ON MY CELLULAR BUSINESS.

DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT THAT ONE-EYED DUMBASS T-LAY.

THAT'S JUST MY BABY MAMA'S BROTHER, MAN.

KNOW WHAT? I'M A GOOD BUSINESSMAN,

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

AND I HEAR GOOD BUSINESS WHEN IT COME AT ME.

SO WHAT WE GONNA DO IS, WE GONNA WORK THIS OUT

TILL YOU PAY UP MY 70 GRAND,

AND WE GONNA TALK ABOUT DOING

SOME LITTLE PARTNERSHIP

ON THIS CELLULAR PHONE SHIT YOU TALKING ABOUT.

I HEAR YOU.

SO I'M GONNA HOLLER AT YOU LATER.

YOU AIN'T GONNA BE SORRY, DAWG.

WE GONNA GET PAID.

I'M GONNA HOLLER AT YOU, DAWG.

YO, BLACK!

WONTON CAN'T SAVE YOUR PUNK ASS NOW.

MAN, I ALREADY HANDLED THIS SHIT WITH ROSCOE, DAWG.

YOU BETTER STOP FUCKING WITH ME, HEAR?

NIGGA, YOU THOUGHT THE STOPPED MAKING GUNS WHEN THEY MADE YOURS, HUH?

Roscoe on P.A.: T-LAY, YOU BETTER BRING YOUR BITCH ASS UPSTAIRS

UNTIL BLACK DO SOMETHING YOU COULDN'T EVEN DO

LIKE BRING ME SOME BUSINESS.

GET YOUR BITCH ASS UPSTAIRS, T-LAY.

YOU MIGHT BE STRAIGHT WITH ROSCOE,

BUT THIS SHIT'S PERSONAL.

I'M GONNA PUT YOUR ASS IN THE DIRT.

GO WASH DISHES FOR ROSCOE, NIGGA.

I'M THE MAN NOW.

SEE YOU ON THE STREET, YOU BITCH,

YOU AND THEM LADIES YOU WITH, HEAR?

HOLLA AT ME.

GET YOUR BITCH ASS OUT OF HERE.

Roscoe: T-LAY, CHANGE OF PLANS.

I WANT YOU TO FIND OUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER'S INSIDE CONNECTION

AND GET THE BLACK BOX.

WE GONNA TAKE OVER HIS BUSINESS AND PUT HIS SNEAKY ASS TO SLEEP.

WHAT THE FUCK YOU POINTING A GUN--

POINTING A FUCKING GUN AT ME FOR?

MOVE THE FUCK OVER.

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED IN THERE?

SHIT. WE AIN'T GOT TO WORRY ABOUT TAKING NO SHIT.

I WENT IN THERE AND TOLD ROSCOE

WHAT THE FUCK WAS ON MY MIND.

IT'S COOL.

COME ON, COME ON. THERE THEY ARE.

MAN, YOU KNOW THEM MOTHERFUCKERS OVER THERE IN THE SUIT

BEEN WATCHING US, MAN.

MAN, WHAT MOTHERFUCKERS IN THE SUIT?

RIGHT OVER THERE. THEY CHECKING SHIT OUT.

WHAT YOU MEAN, CHECKING SHIT OUT?

I MEAN CHECKING OUT.

THEY WAS HERE, CHECKING IT OUT.

THEY WAS CHECKING IT OUT.

CHECK, CHECK, CHECK, CHECK, CHECKING IT OUT!

LET'S GO. COME ON. LET'S GO. LET'S GO.

[TIRES SQUEALING]

OH, SHIT! WHOA!

JESUS CHRIST. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN?

WHO THE FUCK IS THAT?

DAMN FBI! SHIT!

N.W.A.: ♪ ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ♪

♪ CHANCES ARE USUALLY NOT GOOD

♪ 'CAUSE I FREEZE WITH MY HANDS ON A HOT HOOD ♪

♪ GETTING JACKED BY THE YOU-KNOW-WHO ♪

SHIT! HEY, MAN. NEXT TIME, HIT A HOT DOG STAND

BECAUSE I'M KIND OF HUNGRY.

♪ WE'RE 3 MORE BROTHERS, I MEAN, STREET BROTHERS ♪

♪ NOW WEARIN' MY DYES 'CAUSE I'M NOT STUPID, MOTHERFUCKERS ♪

♪ THEY'RE OUT TO TAKE OUR HEADS ♪

♪ FOR WHAT WE SAID IN THE PAST

♪ POINT BLANK, NIGGA, KISS MY BLACK ASS... ♪

GODDAMN! TAKE IT EASY, MAN!

MY BLADDER CAN'T TAKE IT!

MAN, GET YOUR BITCH ASS OUT

AND GO CLOSE THE MOTHERFUCKING HOOD.

PRETEND LIKE YOU FLYING LIKE

WHEN YOU BE ON THAT ANGEL DUST.

♪ RUNNING LIKE A "G"

♪ BUT, SEE, I MIGHT HAVE SLAYED Y'ALL ♪

HURRY UP, BOY WONDER.

♪ HOLD IT IN THE AIR 'CAUSE MC REN ♪

♪ HAS 100 MILES OF RUNNIN'

CLOSE THE HOOD, DAWG.

IT WON'T CLOSE.

[HORN HONKING]

AAH!

♪ I CAN TELL YOU WHY

♪ RUNNIN' WITH MY BROTHERS

♪ HEADING FOR THE HOME BASE

♪ WITH A STEADY PACE

♪ ON THE FACE THAT JUST WE RACED ♪

♪ THE ROAD AHEAD GOES ON AND ON ♪

♪ THIS SHIT IS GETTING LONGER THAN A MOTHERFUCKIN' MARATHON ♪

AAH!

STUPID MOTHERFUCKER!

♪ NOBODY'S PICKING UP A NIGGA WITH A ATTITUDE ♪

♪ CONFUSED, YO, BUT DRE'S A NIGGA... ♪

ABOUT TIME YOU DO SOMETHING RIGHT.

♪ BEEN ACCUSED AND ABUSED OF THE CRIME ♪

♪ OF POISONING YOUNG MINDS

♪ BUT YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT... ♪

MAN, WHAT THE FUCK WRONG WITH YOU?

FUCK IT. YOU OWE ME, MAN.

GIVE ME $10.

FBI man: WHERE ARE THEY GOING?

♪ AND ANY MOTHERFUCKER THAT DISAGREES... ♪

Blue: OH, SHIT, MAN. SLOW DOWN.

BE CAREFUL, MAN!

Black: IF YOU WANT ME,

COME GET ME, MOTHERFUCKER.

NO DOUBT ABOUT IT!

♪ GOT US TICK AND RUNNIN' SINCE THEY FIRED THE GUN ♪

♪ AND STARTED THE CLOCK

♪ THAT'S WHEN THE "E" JUMPED OFF THE STARTING BLOCK ♪

FBI man: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, JAMES?

MAN, FUCK THIS SHIT.

FOR A DEUCE AND A QUARTER,

THAT'S A YMCA THERE.

KNOCK THAT MOTHERFUCKER OVER.

YOU SON OF A BITCH, YOU'RE GONNA KILL US!

[SCREAMING]

I'M NOT STOPPING. COME ON.

Andrew: HEY. HEY, MAN.

WHAT THE FUCK YOU DOING IN THE STREET, MAN?

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

[TIRES SQUEALING]

WATCH OUT!

Blue: AAH!

UNH!

[SCREAMING]

FUCK, NIGGA. I HIT LITTLE BROTHER.

SHIT! DAMN, DAWG. YOU ALL RIGHT?

FAT ASS, WHAT YOU DOING HERE?

YOU KNOW YOUR MOM TOLD ME

DON'T EVEN FUCK WITH YOU, MAN.

YOU MIGHT AS WELL GO HOME.

COME ON. HELP ME WITH DAWG, MAN.

[SIRENS]

HEAVY-ASS MOTHERFUCKER, MAN.

MAN, HURRY UP, BLUE. THEY COMING.

I DON'T KNOW WHY WE NEED THIS MOTHERFUCKER ANYWAY. SHIT.

THERE GO THAT SPOT WE USED TO HANG OUT AT.

MAN, LET'S PUT HIM IN THERE.

LEAVE HIS ASS RIGHT HERE ON THE DAMN GROUND.

RIGHT HERE. HERE IT IS RIGHT HERE, DAWG.

HOLD HIM UP SO I CAN OPEN THIS MOTHERFUCKER.

BLACK BOX, WHITE COP.

THE THING RIGHT ON THE SIDE, RIGHT ON THE SIDE.

GO SEE WHERE THEY AT, MAN. GO SEE WHERE THEY AT.

HURRY UP.

[SCREAMING]

[HELICOPTER FLYING]

[LITTLE BROTHER MOANING]

OH, MAN, MY BACK.

PICK LITTLE BROTHER UP, BLUE.

I TOLD YOU DON'T PLAY NO GAMES, BOY.

DON'T PLAY NO GAMES. DON'T MAKE ME HURT YOU.

HURRY UP.

[GROANING]

MAN, THAT'S THEM NIGGAS THAT WOULDN'T GIVE ME $5.00.

HEY! YOU'RE THE MOTHERFUCKERS

WHO SOLD ME THAT PHONE!

[SPEAKS SPANISH]

WHAT HE SAY, WHAT HE SAY, DAWG?

OH. HOMES, CHECK THIS OUT.

CHECK THIS OUT, HOMES.

WE DON'T WANT NO PROBLEM.

KILL THEM, MAN. KILL THEM.

HA HA!

[SPEAKS SPANISH]

WHAT IF I GIVE YOU 3 DAYS TO ADD TIME,

TWO HOURS, AND A FREE PAGER

WITH YOUR PHONE, HOMES?

AND A PIÑATA WITH A LOT OF CANDY.

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

I BET YOU GIVE ME $5.00 NOW.

[TRAIN RUMBLING OVERHEAD]

HA HA HA! CHECK THIS OUT.

NO!

HOLD ON, HOLD ON. BRING HIS ASS RIGHT HERE.

I AIN'T GONNA SHOOT. I'M GONNA MAKE HIM DANCE.

[FIRING GUN]

THAT'S MY NIGGA RIGHT HERE!

[WHISTLES]

[SHOUTING IN SPANISH]

GET YOUR ASS BACK OVER THERE.

[BARKING]

BLACK AND BLUE, YOU MOTHERFUCKING DOGS.

WE BETTER GET OUT OF HERE

BEFORE WE GET EATEN.

[SCREAMING]

[DOGS GROWLING]

GODDAMN.

MAN. DAMN YOU, BLACK AND BLUE.

OH, FUCK. THEM DOGS DONE FUCKED ME, MAN.

SAY, MAN, YOU THINK THEY GONNA FIND US IN HERE, MAN?

SHIT. THEY'LL NEVER FIND US DOWN HERE, DAWG.

MOTHERFUCKER STINK, MAN.

WHAT'S UP WITH LITTLE BROTHER?

LISTEN!

I GOT $100 THAT I'LL WHUP

ANY ONE OF YOUR ASSES IN BALL,

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

WHERE WE AT, DAWG?

SHIT. WE MUST BE BY THE GODDAMN COURT.

COME ON, MAN. LET'S GET OUT FROM HERE.

COME ON.

WHAT'S UP?

FUCK THAT!

AAH!

BITCH, I SHOULD KILL YOU RIGHT NOW

FOR WHAT YOU DID THE OTHER NIGHT.

GET THE FUCK UP OUT HERE.

HEY. FUCK YOU.

COME. GET YOUR BITCH ASS OUT OF THE TRUNK.

WE GOT A SURPRISE FOR YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.

SURPRISE YOU AIN'T COMING BACK FROM.

WATCH BLACK.

Black: LET ME MAKE A DEAL WITH YOU.

NIGGA, SHUT THE FUCK UP.

DEAD MEN DON'T MAKE DEALS.

T-Lay: PUT THEM OVER THERE.

BLACK, I KNOW THAT BITCH YOU SLEEP WITH

IS YOUR INSIDE CONNECTION,

BUT IF YOU DON'T TELL ME WHERE THAT BLACK BOX IS,

I'M GONNA PUT YOUR ASS TO SLEEP.

WELL, WE AIN'T SLEEPY.

MAN, SHUT UP!

MOTHERFUCKER SURE LOOKS BAD

WITH THEM GUNS, HUH?

MAD DOG, GO TURN THAT JIVE ON.

I'M GONNA CUT HIS BIG BUTT UP RIGHT NOW.

AND DON'T FUCK THE SHIT UP EITHER.

Mad Dog: ALL RIGHT. FUCK.

STUPID, YOU WATCH.

I GOT TO GO TAKE A SHIT.

YOU SMELL LIKE YOU ALREADY SHITTED ON YOURSELF.

SHUT THAT SHIT UP, MAN. I AIN'T PLAYING WITH YOU NO MORE!

STUPID, BUST A CAP IN THEM IF THEY MOVE.

TINY-ASS SUIT ON.

PROBABLY GET A YEAST INFECTION ON YOUR NUTS!

ALL RIGHT, BABY. IT'S ME AGAIN.

I NEED YOU TONIGHT TO TAKE CARE OF THESE LITTLE BITCHES.

[GROANING]

ONE OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS BUDGE,

I'M GONNA HURT YOU.

UNH!

MOTHERFUCKER, I TOLD YOU--I SAID

DON'T MOVE, MOTHERFUCKER!

I'M GONNA KNOCK ONE OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS OUT

EVERY TWO MINUTES.

MAN, WHAT THE FUCK WE GONNA DO NOW, HUH?

WHAT THE FUCK THIS FAKE-ASS MOTHERFUCKING

LOW-BUDGET OLD DAWG GONNA KILL US?

NIGGA, WE BOUTA BOUTA, NIGGA.

WE BOUTA BOUTA GET SHOTA SHOTA.

WHAT THE FUCK WE GONNA DO TO GET OUT OF THIS?

STOP TRIPPING, NIGGA.

WE GONNA SMOKE SOMETHING.

THAT'S WHAT WE GONNA DO.

WHAT THE FUCK YOU TALKING ABOUT, SMOKE SOMETHING, MAN?

WHAT THE FUCK WE GONNA SMOKE?

SINCE WE ABOUT TO GO SEE THE ANGELS AND SHIT,

MIGHT AS WELL SMOKE SOME DUST,

IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

OK, OK. LOOK HERE, OLD DAWG,

MR. GANGBANGER, WE WAS WONDERING,

LIKE, SINCE YOU GONNA KILL US,

CAN WE GET HIGH FIRST?

THE FUCK YOU TALKING ABOUT?

GOT A BLUNT IN MY POCKET, MAN.

WANT TO KNOW IF WE CAN SMOKE IT.

AND WE'LL LET YOU HAVE A COUPLE OF HITS.

WHAT THE FUCK YOU TALKING ABOUT?

Y'ALL PLAYING WITH ME, Y'ALL FUCKING WANT TO DIE.

WE AIN'T GOT TIME TO PLAY. WE FIXING TO DIE.

[FART]

[GROANS]

DAMN! FUCK! ABOUT TIME

YOU MOTHERFUCKERS DO SOMETHING RIGHT, BITCH.

SHIT.

I'LL LIGHT THAT FOR YOU. HOLD UP.

GO AND LIGHT THAT UP.

DAMN!

THAT'S CALLED ONE AND GONE.

HIT THAT ONCE, YOUR ASS IS GONE.

MAN, GET ME THE FUCK OVER THERE.

[COUGHING]

THEM BITCHES HIGH.

[CLUCKING]

GO ON, GET HIGH, BABY.

YO, BAT-MITE.

UNH!

Black: I HOPE I DIDN'T BLOW YOUR HIGH.

UH, EXCUSE ME, MR. KILLER.

YOO-HOO, MR. MURDERER.

IS THERE ANOTHER BATHROOM AROUND HERE ANYWHERE?

[SCREAMING]

OH, YEAH, I BEEN WAITING FOR TH--UNH!

T-Lay: I GOT TO STAY AWAY FROM THEM DAMN BURRITOS.

SORRY-ASS MOTHERFUCKERS.

HEY, STUPID, EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?

UH, Y-YEAH, BOSS.

I'M ALMOST FINISHED.

PUT THEM BOYS TO SLEEP,

AND LET'S ROLL OUT OF HERE.

YOU HEARD HIM. HE SAID WE'RE READY TO ROLL OUT OF HERE.

COCKEYED MOTHERFUCKER!

HEY! HEY! AAH!

[SCREAMING]

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!

OH, NO!

[SCREAMING]

TELL ROSCOE'S DOUBLE-CROSSING ASS HE NEXT.

HE CAN FORGET ABOUT THEM 70 Gs THAT HE WANTS.

AND DON'T FORGET TO WIPE YOUR ASS

WHILE YOU'RE DOWN THERE,

YOU STINK, COCKEYED BITCH,

YOU PUNK MOTHERFUCKER.

YOU DON'T SCARE ME.

I OUGHT TO LEAP DOWN THERE AND BEAT YOUR ASS!

LET IT GO, LET IT GO.

COME ON, MAN.

YOU ALL RIGHT, MAN?

MY FUCKING HEAD.

IF T-LAY WASN'T SO GODDAMN DUMB, WE COULD BE ROLLING.

FUCK YOU GONNA HAVE A ROLLS-ROYCE

AND PUT $5.00 WORTH OF GAS IN THAT BITCH?

SHIT. HE NEED TO BE KNOCKED OFF THAT CLIFF, HUH, DAWG?

SOMETHING.

THE BLACK BOX. THE BLACK--BLACK--

THE BLACK COP.

THE BLACK--OHH.

YO. WHO THE FUCK IS THAT, MAN?

PICK YOUR ASS UP.

OH, SHIT.

WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT?

MY BAD, DAWG. IT WAS JUST THE BIRDS.

BLUE, STOP PLAYING, MAN.

MAN, YOU NEED TO STOP TRIPPING ON SOME BLACK BOX.

NEED TO GO BACK TO THE SHOPPING CENTER

AND HANDLE OUR BUSINESS.

MONEY BACK.

JAMES!

OH, NO, NO, NO.

JAMES! WHAT?

WOULD YOU COME HERE A MINUTE, PLEASE?

OH, MAN. I'M UP 40.

WOULD YOU COME HERE A MINUTE, PLEASE?

WHY YOU GONNA PUT ME OUT?

GUYS. GUYS. THERE THEY ARE.

OK. NOW THIS IS OUR BIG CHANCE.

OH, YEAH.

YO! FREEZE!

FREEZE! FREEZE!

FREEZE, MOTHERFUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS!

SHUT UP. DO NOT FUCKING MOVE!

WHO THE FUCK ARE Y'ALL, MAN,

THE MEN IN BLACK AND WHITE?

DO NOT FUCKING MOVE!

KEEP YOUR FUCKING MOUTH SHUT!

MAN, THAT'S THE BLACK GUYS.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

MOTHERFUCK--

WHAT THE?

GIVE ME MY MASK BACK!

OH, SHIT, JIM!

GIVE ME MY GUN! GIVE ME MY GUN!

I'M SICK OF THIS BULLSHIT.

WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN AN AFFIRMATIVE ACTION APPROACH.

GET THE FUCK UP OUT OF HERE.

GET UP OUT OF HERE. GET YOUR ASS OUT OF HERE.

I TOLD Y'ALL.

[TIRES SQUEALING]

[YELLING]

UGLY ASS. WHO THEY LOOK LIKE?

MAN, MOTHERFUCKER LOOK LIKE ROGER THE RABBIT AND THE PENGUIN.

THEY LOOKED LIKE AMOS AND ANDY.

THEY LOOK LIKE O.J. AND NICOLE.

O.J. AND NICOLE?

IT'S THE BLACK AND WHITE THING JUMPING OFF THERE.

FUCK ALL THAT. BY THE WAY,

WHICH ONE OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS SLAPPED ME ANYWAY?

NOBODY SLAPPED YOU. YOU HAD A FLY ON YOUR FACE.

I WAS TRYING TO GET THE MOTHERFUCKER OFF.

BLUE, I BEEN WANTING TO WHUP YOUR LITTLE ASS.

UH-HUH, UH-HUH. AND WE--WE'VE BEEN

WANTING TO WHUP YOUR ASS.

IT'S LIKE THAT, HUH?

YEAH, IT'S LIKE THAT.

SEE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS LATER.

HOLLA AT ME.

UH-HUH.

[GROWLING]

MAN, WHERE THAT DAMN BLACK BOX AT ANYWAY?

Lorraine: I GOT TO IT FIRST, AND I SMASHED IT.

YOU SMASHED IT?

Dalton: LORRAINE, I GOT YOU, LORRAINE.

NOW, YOU COULD GO TO JAIL FOR THIS.

Blue: CALM DOWN, JOHNNIE COCKLAN.

Tootsie Roll: DALTON, THERE YOU ARE.

I BEEN LOOKING ALL OVER FOR YOU.

WHERE YOU BEEN, HONEY?

WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GO OUT TO DINNER LAST NIGHT.

I WAS LOOKING ALL OVER FOR YOU.

I COULD NOT FIND-- WHAT, WHAT, WHAT?

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

TOOTSIE...

TOOTSIE, YOU TELL THAT MAN YOU GOT A WOOD?

BLACK!

A WOOD? A WOOD.

A TREE WITH TWO APPLES.

WELL, LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, BABY.

AND A LITTLE BITTY GARDEN.

WELL, I AIN'T NEVER HEARD IT REFERRED TO AS THAT,

BUT TOOTSIE POP, BABY, AIN'T GOT NOTHING TO HIDE!

AAH!

TOO--OK.

AAH!

AND I WANT MY $40 BACK!

YOU MUST HAVE HAD MAKEUP ON DOWN THERE!

NO WONDER IT TOOK ME SO LONG!

OH, NO, YOU WILL NOT HIT ME.

I WILL BEAT YOU.

BRING OUT THE TITTY.

WATCH OUT FOR THAT KILLER COMB.

PUT MILK ON HIM, TOOTSIE!

PUT MILK ON HIM!

MOTHERFUCKER CRAZY, MAN.

WHAT'S UP, MAN? YOU GONNA HELP ME FIX

THIS BLACK BOX OR WHAT?

NO. YOU FIX THAT BLACK BOX.

I'M GONNA FIX THIS BLACK BOX RIGHT HERE.

YEAH.

LOOK HERE. CAN A NIGGA WATCH?

YOU NEED TO GO WATCH NASTY AND HER SISTER.

DAMN.

THAT'S WHAT YOU AFTER.

THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO, TOO.

COME SIT DOWN.

MY LITTLE CANDY MONSTER.

COME INTO MY SHOP,

WHERE IT ALL STARTED.

OOH, YES.

REMEMBER HOW WE USED TO DO IT?

MM-HMM. YES, I DO.

I BEEN THINKING ABOUT SETTLING DOWN

AND GOING LEGIT.

MM-HMM.

OH, WILL YOU--

YES, BLACK!

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

LET ME SHOW YOU.

GOING FOR THE POCKET, YOU'RE GOING FOR--

WILL YOU GO INTO BUSINESS WITH ME?

BUSINESS? YEAH. WHAT YOU THOUGHT

I WAS GONNA MARRY YOU OR SOMETHING?

I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA GIVE ME THE HOOK UP.

THIS IS THE HOOK UP.

IT'S ALL LEGIT, TOO.

MY NEW SEX LINE. ALL YOU GOT TO DO

IS ANSWER THE PHONE, GIRL.

KEEP THAT.

I DO NEED A JOB.

YEAH. YOU DO NEED A JOB.

YOU STILL GONNA BE MY CANDY MONSTER?

24/7.

YES. GIVE ME A LITTLE SOMETHING-SOMETHING.

Bessie: BLUE. BLUE. BLUE.

LITTLE SORRY-ASS MOTHERFUCKER.

I WANT MY MONEY BACK.

LOOK HERE. WE CLOSED.

YOU AIN'T GETTING NO GODDAMN MONEY BACK.

COME BACK IN TWO YEARS.

TWO YEARS? I WANT MY MONEY BACK NOW!

THE TV STILL DON'T WORK,

AND MY SISTER LOST HER VIRGINITY

BECAUSE OF YOUR DAMN UNCLE.

HA HA! SURPRISE.

JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T FUCK ON TUESDAY,

IT DON'T MAKE YOU NO VIRGIN.

I'M GONNA MAKE YOU RESPECT ME AND MY SISTER, BLUE.

AAH, AAH!

YOU GOT THE OLD GUN.

OH, NOW YOU GONNA SHOOT ME

WITH THE BIG DANIEL BOONE.

WELL, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. LOOK HERE.

I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A TARGET.

GO AHEAD AND SHOOT ME.

GO ON BECAUSE YOU GOT THAT FROM MY UNCLE.

I KNOW IT DON'T WORK.

GO AHEAD. AIM AND SHOOT ME IN MY ASS.

HUH? GO AHEAD. SHOOT AT IT.

SHOOT ME IN MY ASS.

YOU MOTHERFUCKER!

AAH! THIS BITCH DONE SHOT ME

IN MY ASS!

OHH!

♪ UHH, NA NA NA

♪ MAKE THEM SAY, "UHH, UHH" ♪

♪ NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA ♪

BLACK AND BLUE.

OH!

THIS MOTHERFUCKER DRUNK OVER HERE.

NO, I'M NOT.

ONE LINE. DON'T KNOW IT.

[INDISTINCT]

I WILL, I WILL. PLEASE, BLACK.

GIVE ME 50 CENT, LET ME KEEP 50 CENT.

HEY! HEY!

BLACK DONE HIT A MOTHERFUCKER. IS THAT IN THERE?

SHIT! THAT SHIT'S--

IS THAT SHIT ON THE SCRIPT?

BLACK OR MASTER P? I DON'T KNOW.

[MUMBLING]

WHEN THE FUCK IS JAKE GONNA BE HERE?

Blue: I'M GONNA GET ME SOME PUSSY

BEFORE I LEAVE THIS MOTHERFUCKER.

[SIGHS]

I AM GONNA GET ME SOME PUSSY, I PROMISE YOU,

BEFORE I LEAVE THIS MOTHERFUCKER.

I'M FUCKING SOMEBODY IN THIS MOTHERFUCKER.

CUT.

SHOOT ME IN MY ASS. GO AHEAD.

MOTHERFUCKER!

OH. THE BITCH GUN DON'T WORK.

YOU'RE ALL MINE, MAN. FUCK YOU!

I'M SORRY.

YOU'RE ALL MINE!

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON, MAN?

SHUT UP!

TALK TO ME, MAN.

SAY WHAT?

ARE YOU DOING SOMETHING?

OH, YOU'RE WORKING.

THAT'S NICE. YOU--

AHA.

Bessie: HOW WE GONNA CARRY THIS SHIT BACK TO 122nd?

Blue: PUT IT ON YOUR BACK, SHOPPER.

LOOK. CHECK THIS OUT.

I AIN'T TRYING TO RUN NO GAME ON YOU,

BUT THIS WHAT YOU NEED TO DO.

WE GOT THE BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE OVER HERE.

THAT DUDE STUPID, MAN.

[LAUGHTER]

GO AHEAD AND SHOOT ME.

YOU MOTHERFUCKER!

GO AHEAD. SHOOT ME IN MY ASS.

YOU MOTHERFUCKER!

DAMN.

JESUS CHRIST! I CAN'T GO ON.

♪ "UHH, UHH"

♪ NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA ♪

♪ NIGGA, I'M THE COLONEL OF THE MOTHERFUCKING TANK ♪

♪ Y'ALL AFTER BIG THANGS, WE AFTER BIG BANK ♪

♪ THIRD WARD HUSTLERS, SOLDERS IN COMBATS ♪

♪ CONVICTS AND DEALERS AND KILLERS WITH TRUE TATS ♪

♪ NEVER GAVE A FUCK ABOUT NO HOS OR NO RICHES ♪

♪ AND NIGGAS COME SHORT

♪ I'M DIGGING DITCHES

♪ M.P. PULLING STRIPES, COMMANDER IN CHIEF ♪

♪ AND FOOLS RUN UP WRONG

♪ NIGGA, I'M KNOCKING OUT SOME TEETH ♪

♪ I'M DOWN HERE SLANGING

♪ ROLLING WITH THESE HUSTLERS

♪ TRYING TO GET RID OF ALL YOU HATERS ♪

♪ AND YOU BUSTERS

♪ STEPPING ON TOES

♪ BREAK A NIGGA'S NOSE

♪ IN THE PROJECTS, NIGGAS, ANYTHING GOES ♪

♪ BREAKING FOOLS OFF 'CAUSE I'M A NO-LIMIT SOLDIER ♪

♪ AT EASE, NOW SALUTE THIS PASS ME THE DOJA ♪

♪ MAKE THEM SAY, "UHH, UHH"

♪ NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA ♪

♪ MAKE THEM SAY, "UHH, UHH"

♪ NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA ♪

♪ MAKE THEM SAY, "UHH, UHH"

♪ NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA ♪

♪ FIEND EXERCISING HIS RIGHT OF EXORCISM ♪

♪ BUSTING OUT THE EXPEDITION ♪

♪ BULLETS CHOPPING HATERS

♪ BUSINESS TO ABOUT THE SIZE OF PRISMS ♪

♪ OUR MISSION

♪ THEY HEARD WE SCARY, NO-LIMIT MERCENARY ♪

♪ NO TELLING HOW BAD IT GET ♪

♪ BECAUSE THE WORST WILL VARY ♪

♪ I HEARD YOU MAKE THEM WORRY ♪

♪ THAT THIS FOR THE LOOT

♪ THEY INTIMIDATED BY THE ROUNDS ♪

♪ THAT THE TANK SHOOT

♪ TANK DOGS, SALUTE

♪ EVERY ROBBERY IN STORE 'CAUSE THEY KNOW ♪

♪ EVERYTHING FINED KNOW

♪ MEAN MO' MONEY MO'

♪ LITTLE FIEND STILL WANT THE GREENS ♪

♪ THE CORNBREAD AND THE CABBAGE ♪

♪ IN YOUR HOOD, REMINDING YOU BITCHES WHO THE BADDEST ♪

♪ DEFINITELY THE MADDEST

♪ SO THE CRIME GONNA STICK THEM UP ♪

♪ MY UHH WENT TWICE, UHH, UHH ♪

♪ AND ENDED WITH 9, GET THEM

♪ MAKE THEM SAY, "UHH, UHH"

♪ NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA ♪

♪ MAKE THEM SAY, "UHH, UHH"

♪ NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA ♪

♪ "P" GONNA MAKE YOU SAY, "UHH" ♪

♪ I'M GONNA MAKE YOU SAY, "UHH" ♪

♪ I'M NOT ERIC B BUT GUARANTEED ♪

♪ TO MOVE THIS MOTHERFUCKING CROWD ♪

♪ I STAY ON LIKE LIGHT SWITCHES, MONEY ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I LIKE RICHES

♪ HITTING NOTHING BUT TIGHT BITCHES ♪

♪ CALL ME, I MIGHT HIT YOU

♪ NIGGA MAKE THEM SAY, "NA NA NA" ♪

♪ DON'T TRIP, AFTER I BUST YOUR SHIT ♪

♪ THEN AFTER THAT SAY, "NA NA NA NA" ♪

♪ I HANG WITH NIGGAS I DO MY THING WITH NIGGAS ♪

♪ THEY WANT TO KNOW IF I GANGBANG ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I HANG WITH A WHOLE GANG OF NIGGAS ♪

♪ SO WHEN WE CONNECT, BITCH, BETTER RESPECT THIS ♪

♪ I STEP QUICK 'CAUSE I GOT A VICIOUS RIGHT HAND ♪

♪ BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? MY LEFT IS QUICK, TOO ♪