Original subtitles

- Previously on Foursome:

The gang and I are having a wet n' wild time here

on Beach Island.

Maybe too wet.

After Courtney's wasted whiz,

we had to get to biz.

Too bad "biz" was for business, and not getting busy,

because Kent and I are having a major disconnect.

I think Kent and I are having a hard time when he's not hard.

Luckily, I had Courtney's boobs to distract me

and keep us on the island.

But distractions, like my luck with boys,

won't last forever.

Snorkeling, here I come!

- Island tattoo, here I come!

- Making out under a waterfall.

- Here we come.

- I'm gonna watch.

Here I come.

- Activity Day!

- Guys, come on, it's an adventure out there!

I'm not gonna let a little rain rain in our parade.

- Justie, we talked about this. You sound like a dad.

- Alright, if you guys stay here, that's fine.

But I'm not missing those waves.

Storm makes for a swell swell.

- Okay, that's exactly what I'm talking about.

That's Dad speak.

Oh, you're so cute.

- My condolences, Court.

- Thank you. - Sorry.

- Heaven, here he comes.

- Oh, great guys, what are we gonna do now?

- I don't know. I mean, there's gotta be

something we can do in here, right?

The brochure did say "comes with fun."

"Murder in Beach House"?

What a dick, scary movie.

- Brick.

- "The Beach Bungalow Log."

- "Wednesday, 1997.

"Just got to Beach Island.

"We're already having a phat time.

"Here with Jess and Brandon.

"Weather's da-bomb."

- Get to the sex stuff.

- "Thursday, 1997.

"Brandon's being a scrub, and we don't want no scrubs.

", Brandon!

- Drama, yes! Drag him.

- They're more '90s than we are.

- Shh, it's getting interesting.

- "Friday, 1997. Shit!

"Walked in on Brandon reading that last entry.

"He stormed out into the storm.

"When we asked where he was going, he told us

to talk to the hand!"

"Through his hollow cackles, he shouted,

"'Sleep with one eye open if you wanna keep it!

"'Your eye, that is!'

"Funny, that sounded like a threat."

New player added.

- Hey, what up, new player?

I like to get to know the people I'm about to kill.

So, my name is Alec.

I like flipping cups, smashing clams,

and my favorite game is "Dead"--

- "Space." I know, Alec.

You forgot to mention hanging with your best bro.

- Josh?

How did you get in here?

- Come on, dude, you know I've been trying to reach you.

I've tried to reach you on every single one of the medias,

but you blocked me on all of them.

- Take a hint, butt plug.

- I don't want you here. - Come on, dude.

You can't throw away our friendship the way

- we used to throw footballs. - I didn't throw it away.

You did, when you tried to bang my sister.

Give it up, Josh.

Just get out.

- Alright, I'll get out.

But I'm never gonna give up.

- "Saturday, 1997.

"We searched for Brandon all over the island,

"but no diggity.

"Weird things are starting to happen.

"We were getting jiggy with it,

"when the front door of da crib

"flew open all on its own!"

- What the freckle was that? - The wind, right?

It was the wind.

- Keep reading!

I'm scared, but I'll be damned

if I don't find out what happens next.

- "Monday, 1997.

"We went to the local police,

"but they won't file a missing person's report.

"They say everyone on the island is technically missing.

"As if!

"The power keeps going out.

"Jess thinks Brandon's behind it.

- Um, the power went out in my motel.

Would you mind if I stayed here until the storm calms?

Hopefully when it does, you'll crack a window.

It smells like flatulence in here.

- Hey, Miss "I Know You Didn't Last Summer,"

our power's out, too.

- She can stay. The more the scarier.

Merrier! Safety in numbers?

What's your name, little Brillo pad?

- Are you kidding? I attend Brayer.

Excuse me, would you mind if I used your facilities?

- Yeah, sure.

- I can't believe they don't remember me.

I remember every person in my grade and their socials.

I've crossed enemy lines and infiltrated the media club.

They were densely welcoming.

Peg, focus up, Brayer Witch.

You need dirt so you can prove to Divit that

you are the most effective member of the Bulletin

and deserve to be put in charge.

Interviews, here I come.

- Hey, just a reminder.

Don't poo.

The power's out, so the toilet won't flush.

- I'm aware.

What are you guys reading?

- Our bungalow's murder mystery log book.

- Girl, sit your bony ass down.

It's my turn.

"Tuesday, 1997.

"We're leaving soon and what should've been

"a fly trip was whack.

"We're buggin' 'cause Brandon's still missing.

"Hoping something bad didn't happen to him,

"but it's starting to look that way."

Oh, hell no!

Even though his name is Brandon, he's black.

And we're always the first to die in scary movies.

I need to stress eat.

- I'll help.

? Da-ko-ta ?

- Girl, quit or get out! You need something?

- I just think we should get to know one another.

You engage in narcotics.

Did you find any exotic drugs on the island?

If so, where are they and what are they called?

Do you intend to bring them back and sell them

to the students of Brayer?

- Okay, I'm on to you.

- What? You are? How? - You asked me about drugs.

Where I get 'em, who I get 'em from, what I do with 'em.

You want drugs.

- Yes, I want all the drugs. That is why I'm here.

The hallucinogens, the amphetamines, inhalants.

The works!

- I'll find the hook-up on the island.

You look like you could use a good high.

- Hey! - Hey.

- This is a surprise.

- Well, I hope I'm not interrupting anything.

- Oh, no, not at all.

We're actually rained in right now.

- Really? Me, too. Weird.

What are you guys up to?

- Oh, we're reading this spooky log

someone left behind in the beach house.

And I gotta say your Nightmare on Elm Street look

is weirdly on theme right now.

- Well, don't think I'm creepy but I'm actually

in your hallway right now.

Still trying to make good by Alec.

He's the reason I'm calling.

You know your brother better than anybody.

Helpful hints?

- I'm honestly probably the worst person to ask.

Alec holds grudges for a crazy long time.

When he gets mad, he stays mad.

When we were younger, I told him Santa wasn't real.

- That's messed up.

- He was 12. He needed to know.

Anyway, he only caved when my mom threw away

his Bernadette Peters doll

because he was using it inappropriately.

He was more pissed off about that than Santa,

so he forgave me.

Maybe you should just find someone Alec hates more than you.

- Great.

That'll be easy.

Well, thanks, Andie.

This really means a lot.

- As a "you're welcome,"

off with the scary sweatshirt, please.

I've had enough boo for one day.

- Fair. I hate scary movies, anyway.

- "Wednesday, 1997.

"I was brushing--"

- Sorry, go ahead.

- "Wednesday, 1997.

"I was brushing--"

Damn it, Andie, fix that.

Tell Kent to keep it in his trousers.

- It's not Kent.

It's...

Josh.

It's not like that.

We're just friends.

He just needs help with something.

- Mm-hmm. - Blood sis!

- Just read.

- "Wednesday, 1997.

"I was brushing

"my teeth after a shower.

"Suddenly I could feel a presence.

"When I looked in the steamed mirror,

"I could've sworn I saw a man with a suitcase.

"I was freakin', so I yelled out, boo-yah!"

"No one was there.

"I thought it was Brandon, but I was just buggin'."

Oh, I gotta pee.

Got ya!

- You're lucky I already whizzed

or you would've caused an accident.

- I got you red-handed, Courtney Todd.

So, let's just take this opportunity

to get to know each other better.

You got kicked off of Brayer's campus for supplying alcohol

to minors, yet here you are again, chugging the boozes.

- You're right.

It is alcohol.

2%. It's mouth wash!

I need it because making out gives me canker sores,

and I deep-tongue dive the reg.

Oh, please, don't the gang about this.

They already think I'm so gross.

- That's not worth telling anyone.

- You are so sweet.

Thank you.

Dakota and Andie never go to the bathroom with me.

You are bitchin', freakin' fun.

BFF.

Double meaning!

This is amazing.

Okay, bye.

- I can't believe once again, I got no dirt.

Certainly, it felt nice to be included.

It was neato that Dakota

thought I was capable of doing drugs,

and it felt swell for Courtney to touch me

for the first time in so long.

It matters not!

Getting the Bulletin in the room, that's what matters!

Time to switch up tactics.

Make them implode from within.

- "Thursday, 1997.

"Something janky must have happened to Brandon,

"because his juju is everywhere.

"We left to lay out on the beach,

"and when we came back to the crib,

"there was some creepy ukulele music playing."

- The story's in real life!

- The music stopped, didn't it?

- Why won't you die?

- Fudgin', stupid, scary horror.

I'm gonna go get a sweatshirt.

- Can I have one, too?

I just wanted to get to know you better.

You're dating transfer student Kent Saydak.

- I'm aware.

- Does it make you sad that he's not here?

Courtney's college boyfriend Justin's here.

Isn't that annoying?

Dakota's been hooking up with different guys

on the island.

Isn't that infuriating?

Even May...

Andie?

Andie?

- I know what you're doing.

- Getting to know you?

- I know you're on the Bulletin

and have it out for us.

I wanna be real clear.

It's not gonna work.

- You knew who I was?

- I've known who you were since the first time I saw you.

- Then why did you let me in?

- Because I was curious.

Curious what you were up to.

- Stop, please!

- Nothing's gonna tear us apart.

No ghost. No one.

The only scary thing would be if someone were to try.

Don't try to float in here and get between us.

Unless we're already floating down here.

We all float down here.

Come down here with us! You'll float, too!

- It's "It"!

- I hate scary movies, don't you?

There's always a horrible villain,

like your old boss.

I never knew why he had it out for us,

but you don't have to follow suit.

I hope you decide to switch movies.

Comedy is way better than horror,

and we're a really funny group.

? Little bunny foo foo ?

? Hopping through the forest ?

- ? Little bunny--

- Ow, my balls! Ow!

- Ugh, I'm over this frickin' rain.

This shit storm is a total shite storm.

And the humidity's missing with my normally flawless 'do.

- Greer? What are you...?

- I just wanted to check on you.

I had a feeling you were scared of storms,

like a little puppy.

- No, I'm not.

- Aw, there, there. Sit.

- I'm already sitting.

- Sit over here. - Okay.

- Okay, so fine.

Maybe I came over because I'm feeling a tad bit OJ.

- I also like orange juice.

- Guilty. I'm feeling guilty?

Look, if I hadn't told you about your whore sister on HC,

then Brayer wouldn't be all topsy-turvy.

And you wouldn't be all...

un-Alec-y.

- Look, it's not your fault that everyone

in my life shanked me.

You were the only one with enough gal gonads

to tell me the truth.

Greer Ashton's pretty cool in my book.

- Alec Fixler's pretty cool in mine.

- You're captain of the cheer squad.

- Well, you're captain of the football team.

- You're really hot.

- Some people think you're hot.

- Thanks for coming.

- Oh, I'm not here for you. I'm here for Andie.

I mean, that is what you said to me on the phone, right?

That Andie needed me to do this?

- Just stand in front of Alec

while I apologize, you know?

Just really let him take you in.

- Okay.

- 'Cause he hates you way more than he hates me.

- Moo like a cow!

Louder!

Bigger!

- Oh, my God!

- That was the...

- Scariest thing I've ever...

- Seen.

- Alright, thanks for coming. - Yeah.

- I have to go.

Thanks for everything.

- Last log. Why don't you read it?

Finish the scary chapter.

Horror really doesn't seem like your genre.

- Why would you want me to?

- You're part of this, Peggy Sue.

- Oh, that's not my middle--

- She doesn't care. Come on, read!

- "Friday, 1997.

"Today is our final day on Beach Island.

"Jess was packing up her diaphragm,

"but then klutzo dropped it.

"It rolled under the couch

"and next to the loose floorboard.

"Jess pulled back the floorboard,

"and before I could even shout,

"'Whoop! There it is!',

"her face fell.

"What she found under there will haunt me

"until my dying day."

- Go on, Court. Get that ghost.

- No way, Jos-gay. Let Fix do it!

- No, I hate scary stuff.

You know this!

- I ate the batteries.

- I'm an investigative reporter, aren't I?

Let's get some evidence.

It's a tooth!

- Battery acid.

- Ew. - Ugh.

- I know you're in there.

I brought you guys some backup power.

This rain is not 'acabra.

- Hello, Brandon.

- What did you call--

the Log!

How did you figure it out?

- It's in my journalist blood.

One, you've been on the island for 20 years,

yet you've never been invited

to the Beach Island Bikini Bonanza.

So the timeline matched.

Two, your fingers are warped from playing

a string instrument, perhaps a ukulele.

Three, you speak with a slight lisp on your Zs.

Maybe you were born with it or--

- Maybe it's Maybelline!

May...

belline.

- No!

He's missing a tooth!

- The storm makes my gums swell.

My veneer won't fit.

Please, don't tell anyone about this.

I've been scared this story's gonna come out for years.

All my friends are jerks!

They ridiculed me!

I realized that I was better off staying

on the island forever than ever going back home.

I know you understand, young boy!

Wanting a new life? To start over?

- Bitch, you better! - Please!

Don't mention my real name on Kelp.

- So, what? You just want us

to let your friends and family think

you got eaten by a shark, or something?

- Yes! Yes, exactly!

Is it a deal?

- Yeah. - Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Alright, I will be burning this.

My friends were such boners.

- Way to figure it out, Peg.

I was like, "How?"

And then I gave up while you were explaining it.

- This was way more fun than an Activity Day.

- Mm-hmm.

Peg, you will be called Poppin'.

- You can come to the waterfall.

- This was a mistake.

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