Original subtitles

Good evening ladies and gentlemen,

do you find it tiresome,

waiting for cement to dry before dropping it in the river?

If so you'll be interested in our new pre-fabricated,

body disposal units,

at first glance this might appear to be a concrete telephone booth,

it is far more useful,

the body is placed in here,

the two sides are bolted together,

it is taken to the edge of the dock and then,

all very neat and tidy,

you ladies will love it,

no more messy mixing and pouring of concrete,

no more complicated and expensive equipment,

no more tell-tale cement on the soles of your shoes,

for details please consult your friendly neighborhood hood,

now for a 60-second consultation with our sponsor,

definitely not a hood,

this man's record is spotless, after all,

boring people to death is not yet a criminal offence.

COMING HOME

Come in,

oh come in Beggs,

have a seat,

and I�ll see you finally leaving us safe eggs,

in a long time since we started this folding,

-20 years -Yes sir.

What's matter, you feel uncomfortable?

Tired, feels kind of funny.

You'll get used to it,

you'll like it?

I uh I was talking to Connolly your foreman about you,

he tells me that you're the best man he ever had,

says you're gonna hate delusion,

I guess this is one job you won't mind losing,

seriously Beggs, I think you ought to do very well for yourself on the outside,

the way you've learned that trade,

you know, a man the construction business can always do well for himself.

-I�m 50 years old, Warden - 50? It's not old.

Lots of men start new careers at 50.

I uh I see that you have a wife and family,

-Had. -Wife wasn't much on visiting, was she?

No.

You uh, planning on going back to?

It appears that you've saved quite a good deal of money out of your prison pay Beggs,

let me see, we started our pay system eight years ago,

you got eleven dollars a month for three years,

and you went to the work camp and got uh twenty dollars a month for the next five,

that's a total of one thousand five hundred and ninety six dollars,

only you get a forty dollar allowance when you leave here,

so that makes sixteen hundred and thirty six dollars,

it's quite a stake,

you know not very many men walk out of prison with that kind of money.

-I saved every nickel. -And you were smart,

you know a man can get a good start with sixteen hundred dollars,

you just see that you hang on to it.

That money's all been taken care of Warden.

What do you mean?

I�m gonna give it someone,

someone who said I�d never have a nickel,

I just want to show her.

Good luck Beggs.

Thank you Warden.

I hope you find what you're looking for on the outside.

One wristwatch gold-plated with the inscription to 'Harry with love Edith',

it's still running,

one pair of cufflinks, one tie flip,

one key chain, one black onyx charm,

one wallet, four photographs,

and one identity card, no other contents,

oh here's a little something to fill up that wallet,

a nice check for 636 bucks,

you're a rich man pop.

Well you're coming or not?

Oh yeah yeah I�m coming.

-You want all of this in cash? -All in cash.

It's an awful lot of money to be carrying around don't you want to open an account?

I want it in cash.

All right. How would you like it?

See, make it in,

50s, 20s, and resting small bills.

Sorry.

-Yes sir. -You have a pay phone in here?

Over there.

-Is this phone working? -Sure it's working, you put in a dime.

A dime?

Used to be a nickel.

Hello...

Hello...

Hello...

What it be? You look like you need a drink, pal.

Whatever happened to Mike...

Who?

I�ll have a double whiskey.

You don't mean Mike Duran he stoned this bar once?

-Yeah. -Six feet under maybe 10 years ago,

place had four owners since then,

you were friend of Mike's or something?

Yeah I knew him, a long time ago,

What's matter, pop?

You got a cold or something?

No, no it's nothing.

I just can't take this anymore that's all.

You need practice,

practice makes perfect you know.

I don't think I want anymore.

Oh come on you can't fly on one wing.

What? -Have another drink it'll taste better this time.

Oh I don't think I want anymore.

Well I tell you what,

you buy one and you try it,

and if you don't like it I�ll finish it for you.

It's like a money-back guarantee,

you don't get your money back,

Okay why not?

Lucky...

Well, used to it,

now you see,

what I tell you,

you know, you're a nice man,

you got nice gray hair.

You're not drinking your drink.

Listen uh couldn't we sit down at a table and relax a little?

Huh, oh sure, why not?

How about that? my foot's going to sleep.

You're cute.

You know I�m glad you came in tonight,

let me help you.

Come on let's finish up our drinks.

Okay pal rise and shine,

come on, come on, wake up.

-What'd you say? -This ain't a hotel I got to close-up.

Oh yeah I must have fallen asleep, what time is it?

It's after one, time for you to go home.

-Where is she' -Who?

-The the girl. -Look buddy, I've to run to home too.

-It's gone. -What? -My wallet.

My wallet maybe I left it on the bar,

it must be around here it's got to be,

-maybe, so you, you must have seen it her. -Look buddy...

No but my wallet I�ve got to have my wallets all I�ve got you've help me...

I didn't see your wallet,

look, you are accusing me.

No, the girl, uh, that, the girl, I was with the one that works here.

No girl works here fella you get the wrong idea the kind of place.

Listen please don't joke with me you don't fool around you gotta help me,

look, but that that that uh my money that wallet where's that girl?

Mister I�m gonna tell you once more,

I didn't see your lousy wallet, no girl works here,

if you got yourself rubbed by somebody,

-that's your business. -You liar!

Excuse me,

you know cut that out, pop, I don't want to hurt you,

All right.

That girl now, my wallet, you stole my money.

Bum, you never had any money to steal,

now get out of here before I throw you out.

Give my wallet!

Why don't you go home pop?

Edith?

I know it's kind of late, I�m sorry to come so late,

they let me out today,

could,

could I come in maybe?

I�m, I�m awful, first he could have a glass of water?

Thanks.

Oh I look terrible,

why don't you give me some warning Harry?

I�m,

sorry Edith, I I tried phoning you but,

when I heard your voice I, I couldn't talk.

So that was you,

you look different Harry,

I didn't even know you at first,

yeah I guess I look different too,

I had a letter from the prison a couple of weeks ago telling me who's getting out.

I tore it up,

did you hear what I said I said I tore up the letter.

I�m not blaming you.

Nothing's changed about the way I feel Harry,

when you shot at that cop and that hold up 20 years ago I,

made up my mind about us, I never wanted to see you again.

-I didn't mean to shoot him we needed that money. -Yeah,

you thought all I cared about was money, you blamed the whole thing on me,

on the count of the money didn't you? ain't that right?

It was a long time ago,

I stopped thinking about it,

long ago.

Yeah you think I could it?

wasn't that easy for me,

it was just like I was in prison too.

Well you could have divorced me I I told you that when I first got sent up.

I don't believe in divorce and you know that.

I didn't come here to fight with you.

Well, what did you come for, who sent for you who invited you?

I didn't even come to the prison to meet you, wasn't that plain enough?

I wanted to see you,

I don't hold grudges.

Then stop sitting there like you're my conscience or something,

what I did I had to do,

you ain't got no right to come here and blame it all on me.

I�m sorry you feel that way you don't have to.

Oh yeah,

take a look at this place,

take a good look, still the same crummy place,

you know how I make my living?

I wash people's dirty floors for them,

yeah and I scrub the walls,

I say yes ma'am,

no ma'am,

you think you had any worse than me?

I wanted to help you Edith, I I wanted to bring you some money.

Oh sure.

About eight years ago they started paying the prisoners,

not much but a little every month,

and I made extra by working in the labor camp,

and I saved every nickel of it,

they they gave a script so we could buy things that,

I never used mine I I just let it build up.

But you didn't have to do me no favors.

I had,

sixteen hundred dollars when they let me out,

but now,

now I haven't got a thing.

What?

It's, it's gone Edith,

just like that,

one day out and it's and it's gone.

What do you mean it's gone?

It was stolen down at Mike's place.

Mike' place,

Mike's been dead for 10 years,

what are you drunk?

I wanted to make it up to you,

I learned the building trade in prison,

and I worked hard and I saved every nickel,

but it didn't do me any good.

Oh what are you crying for? it's me that ought to do the crying,

Harry would you stop that,

Sorry will you just let me wash my face.

Go ahead.

-Here. -Thanks.

Your hair is so white.

Warden said I should get it dye,

he said 50 is not so old, he said I could get a job easy.

50 is not old.

I learned my job good, the construction foreman said he, said I was,

the best man that he ever had he said he he was sorry to see me leave.

What you are saying?

I said: too bad mister, too bad I�m, I�m quitting this job I�m gonna,

go look for another one, one that that pays back,

and, and I can do it, don't worry about that.

Sure you can.

Gee I, I can do well for myself if if,

just hadn't been for that money.

Money? Is that all we're ever going to talk about, is money is money so important?

-It doesn't have to be Edith. -Oh Harry,

Edith, Edith remember remember the watch you gave me? I I still got it.

it still runs,

it's a fine watch,

it keeps good time,

well it's,

getting kind of late I guess I�d better be going.

Where to?

I don't know.

I never thought about it.

well you can stay here I,

I couldn't turn you out without no place to go I couldn't do that.

You mean it?

You can sleep on the couch,

if you want it.

I want it, Edith.

I want to stay here.

Well I said you could, didn't I?

I want to stay for good not just tonight,

is that okay?

Edith...

No you don't.

You two haven't seen each other before,

Harry, this is our daughter Angela,

honey your father's come home,

Angela, honey your father's come home.

I know the more cynical of our audience,

will object to the unabashed sentimentality of our story's conclusion,

but I�m sure most of you enjoy seeing a loving family,

together once more under one roof,

I shall return to discuss this after the following.

Now I must show you our economy size,

the only difference being that the victim must,

be allowed to stiffen so that he can stand erect,

then his feet are placed in here,

and the concrete pieces bolted together,

if you don't wish to be splashed,

you just aim the gentleman toward the end of the dock,

and,

roller skates,

we think of everything until next week good night.