Original subtitles

Good evening.

Because the television screen distorts the human figure,

some people have the mistaken idea that I�m larger than the average.

I can only say that if you think I am large,

now you should see me before taxes.

No doubt inspired by this impression a well-meaning viewer,

has sent me a reducing machine.

However it is so unique I want to share it with you.

It is amazingly successful in cutting off those extra pounds.

As you see this is a revolutionary concept,

in weight reduction. These exquisite machines come in a number of sizes.

This is the Madame Lafage model, except for two knitting needles,

it has no extras at all.

From this they are variously priced up to the salon size,

which comes with a parking lot for tumbrils,

and a small crowd to jeer and spit at you.

I�m certain you will agree that the advertisements for the salon model,

do not exaggerate when they say it is fit for a king.

But we have a dramatic show to present, if I were a critical man,

I would say the production could be vastly improved,

by some judicious pruning.

For example this...

DEATHMATE

Three,

Oh you're good very good.

You're good at everything aren't you Conan?

Well I don't know Peter.

As the man said just lucky I guess.

Oh, not lucky just good.

Lisa doesn't think you're lucky. Not Lisa.

She thinks you're good too.

Don't you Lisa?

Oh I think Ben is very good in lots of ways.

So far he's beaten your cards, billiards,

and at your own favorite game, golf,

which reminds me to remind you,

did you pay him the fifty dollars he won from you yesterday?

Fifty dollars? I must forget the payoff bets.

I�ll write a check, my check good enough for you Conan?

Sure it is.

But I still don't want it.

However you insist on paying off a bet.

You lost this last game, so chug it down again.

Some lousy game.

Well here goes nothing.

I think that's enough for now old man.

Not so fast there, you gotta give me a chance to win.

Tomorrow's another day,

-I�ll give you a chance then, all right? -Tomorrow is too late.

I insist now, right here and now.

Take it easy you better lie down for a while.

-Come on Peter take a nap. -Once you know about it.

You don't fool me Lisa I know you.

Who's Ben Conan think he is anyway?

Just a friend Peter that's all.

Ben, what makes a man change so much?

In just two short years. When I first married him,

-he seemed so strong, so capable. -Well no one really knows what,

makes a man the way he is.

What forces him to do the things he does,

it's for me pretending to be a psychiatrist.

No Ben, but you're kind.

Steady dependable.

You're just the way men should be.

It's getting dark.

Dusk, the loneliest time of day.

Is it that way for you too?

It's that way for everybody in the world?

Only for those who don't have anyone.

And this solitude finds you out and you look for the face you love.

-but it isn't there. -And you listen for a voice,

and it isn't there either.

I think I know what you're going to say. It's a crazy world isn't it?

And you hardly know me, is that what you were going to say?

No, what I was going to say...

Just two short weeks ago I didn't even know you were alive.

And now, now you're the most important thing in my life.

-And I can't help it. -I hope you mean that.

-Because I love you. -I know that.

It seems as if I�ve been waiting for you all my life.

-And yet... -What? -You're right even though you won't say it.

-We do know so little about each other. -I know I love you.

And have since the first moment I saw you.

As far as my past life is concerned there's really not much to tell.

Keep talking darling I love the sound of your voice.

You know it's the first time we've ever been alone together.

Peter's in there.

He'll be out for hours.

And he also fired the servants this morning.

Tell me why didn't you ever get married?

Because I knew that somewhere in this world there was someone like you,

I�d never met her but I wouldn't settle for less.

So I remained in Arizona and kept busy with my mind.

-Mine a gold mine? -No darling a silver mine.

Although I must admit it kept me in beans and sourdough,

and an occasional trip to Europe thrown in,

-or at least it used to. -Used to?

-Are you having problems? -No no no it'll all work out.

Business worries can make a person sick. Very nearly did me.

Three years ago when my father died he left the business to me,

then after I married Peter, I gave him authority to manage it.

When I found out what he was like, I asked him for a divorce.

He just laughed at me, with the community property...

It seems we're orphans of the storm, the financial storm that is,

but we'll make out.

Sorry mr Conan, maybe I should call you Fred Sheldon or Terry Lord?

I think you're making a mistake.

-People are often mistaking me for... -So? Know who I always took you for?

No, and I don't care, now if you'll excuse me I�m on my way to breakfast.

I�ll tell you who I thought you were, and I could stand some coffee myself.

Oh we could sit down here for a couple of minutes,

no use causing a scene if we don't have to is it.

This is highly embarrassing.

Now what in places are you talking about?

About a lad named Fred Sheldon wanted for bigamy in Miami.

This Sheldon�s a real doll, he's lived off women for years,

bleeds widows, blackmails married dames,

anything for a buck, and when he's through with them,

some of them take over doses of sleeping pills.

All very interesting, what was I got to do with me?

Well let's look at it this way, last year at this time he was posing as Terry Lord,

a retired air force colonel, this year he calls himself Ben Conant,

and pretends to own a silver mine.

-And where do you come in? -Oh yes my name is Moss,

Alvin Moss, ten years on the san Francisco vice squad.

I�m a private investigator now semi-retired,

would you believe it? My client pays me 40 bucks a day for the past two weeks,

to check on this Sheldon character.

And uh who is your client?

Let's not be naive.

Try it...

please.

So long Sheldon.

I�ve been worried about your phone call you sounded so mysterious.

I�m sorry darling I didn't mean to be but, I had to see you.

Then there is something wrong? What is it?

Well it's not very pleasant.

-Have you seen Peter at all today? -No he was still out when I left.

Why?

Because I wanted to tell you before anybody else did.

-I�m afraid your husband is having us watched. -No.

-He probably knows all about last night by now. -No Benny can't.

I�m afraid so darling.

This morning a nasty little private eye character threatened me at my hotel.

That's just like Peter, not enough nerve to come to you himself.

Not only that, apparently he's paying this man to throw mud at me.

Calling me a crook, con man, I don't know what else.

I�m sorry that, I don't know what to say.

You should have never gotten involved with me.

We are involved and it's our problem.

Now what are we going to do about it?

What can we do? Peter is jealous.

And now this will be really dangerous.

Well, I�m scared. I�ve got to leave Peter, tonight.

And don't forget donnie with the evidence your husband has,

he can fight you in court he'll take you for everything you've got.

I can't let him do that.

No I�m I�m the one who's leaving.

No, let Peter keep the business he's ruined it anyway.

I�ve got you Ben, and you're everything that Peter isn't.

-You're successful and... -Successful?

Everything bad happens at once.

This came this morning.

I don't understand.

I can't meet my payroll, they're closing the mine, that's what it means.

But there's something you can do.

Sure sure, I can sell out to Tri-state Mining a big outfit for peanuts.

Fifty thousand dollars.

How much money do you need?

I don't know I suppose ten thousand would do it.

What a fool I am, a month ago I had the money.

Right now I�m broke.

I�d do anything darling, I�d work I�d make sacrifices.

I know that that sounds stupid, corny, but I would.

You could sell out to tri-state,

you'd have fifty thousand dollars and you could get another position.

It's not so easy these days and...

I couldn't do that to you.

I know it's awful of me, but I wish Pete had,

never survived that heart attack last month.

I wish he was dead.

With the heart the way it is maybe.

And don't worry darling, we'll make out.

-I�m going to get us two reservations on the flight for Phoenix tonight. -Oh wonderful.

I think you'd better see your attorney this afternoon,

and I...I�m trying to have a talk with Peter.

-My time would be best to see him. -But for?

Is usually up by then.

I love you darling.

-Well well if it isn't mr Conan? -May I come in?

What do you want?

I came to say goodbye.

You got a nerve coming here?

Then, your type of business takes her, doesn't it?

You want me to go away is that it?

-To stop seeing your wife. -Of course.

Although I must admit you and Lisa are two of a kind.

Immorals, a couple of tiger sharks.

I knew she married me for what she could get out of me.

But I hardly dreamed she was such an incredibly gracious woman.

And why are you so anxious to keep her?

-Unfortunately I happen to be in love with her. -And her money?

-You got to be joking. -About what?

I spotted you, the very first day.

Well well Freddie Sheldon.

I stopped by to pick up my cigarette lighter.

-I forgot it last night. -Convenient.

-Where's Talbot? -I don't know.

-I guess nobody's here. -No then how'd you get in?

I knocked, all right?

-Door's open. -Isn't that always the case? �did you find your lighter?

I haven't had a chance to look I just got here.

I hear water running somewhere, let's take a look Freddy.

-I�ve got better things to do. -I said let's take a look.

In there Freddy.

-What's happened? -I�m just going to ask you that Freddy.

So you did i,t you really did it?

I�m surprised, I didn't think you had the guts. -Are you out of your mind?

-I heard you've been threatening his life. -You're crazy I never threatened him.

From con man to murder in one easy jump.

No no you got it all wrong it it was his heart.

He had another attack just like before but but this time it killed him.

You could do better than.

-Talbot�s heart was fine. -But I know it his wife told me.

Talbott was one of the richest men on the coast,

if he was sick, you think he wouldn't have a pack of doctors?

You're making it up, you're trying to frame me.

He didn't have any money, he was sponging off his wife.

You're killing me Freddie look up Talbot and dun and brad street. Over that way.

-You calling the cops? -Yes but first I�m calling my client.

Client? He's dead.

Yes Freddie, I said my client, the one who hired me and pays me.

Lisa Talbot.

By the way Lisa and Ben Conan did not get married,

if any of you are wondering. Her studies would not permit it.

She is working on an advanced degree at a large state penitentiary,

where she must remain in residence some 20 years.

I know many of you would like to see me use this machine,

I shall do so in just one minute or,

faster than my sponsor can do.

Next week we shall be back with another story,

in answer to request for these machines,

I would like to announce that they are available,

at all french revolutionary war surplus stores.

Good night.