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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:26,700 --> 00:00:28,020 Mate. 2 00:00:32,330 --> 00:00:35,321 I just had the best idea for a new business. 3 00:00:36,880 --> 00:00:39,075 You know how people like to make sex tapes? 4 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:43,162 Right. Fuck. What's this shit? 5 00:00:43,180 --> 00:00:45,780 Turn that shit off. 6 00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:50,040 We go into business together, right? 7 00:00:50,060 --> 00:00:52,755 Making home porn. 8 00:00:55,730 --> 00:00:57,240 We go round to people's houses 9 00:00:57,260 --> 00:00:59,760 with a camera, lights and all the gear 10 00:00:59,780 --> 00:01:02,650 and shoot sex tapes. 11 00:01:04,460 --> 00:01:06,890 Why would anybody want to do that? 12 00:01:06,910 --> 00:01:10,023 Mate, people will love it. 13 00:01:12,020 --> 00:01:13,276 I wouldn't. 14 00:01:13,290 --> 00:01:17,572 Yeah, but you're a prude. Mate, this is a great idea. 15 00:01:18,220 --> 00:01:19,990 You sure you don't want to get in on this? 16 00:01:22,090 --> 00:01:23,714 I came up with a name for the business. 17 00:01:23,730 --> 00:01:25,913 - Mm-hm? - You ready? 18 00:01:25,930 --> 00:01:27,874 Mm. 19 00:01:27,890 --> 00:01:31,169 'Home-o Erotic'. Right? 20 00:01:31,180 --> 00:01:38,509 But the 'homo' is spelt H-O-M-E-O. 21 00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:43,681 Home-o Erotic. Get it? 22 00:01:46,860 --> 00:01:48,560 Do you know what 'homoerotic' means? 23 00:01:48,580 --> 00:01:50,844 Yeah. 24 00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:54,233 It means 'gay'. 25 00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:57,660 Like, gay sex. 26 00:01:58,700 --> 00:01:59,739 Really? 27 00:01:59,750 --> 00:02:01,100 Mm. 28 00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:04,520 Oh, fuck. 29 00:02:04,540 --> 00:02:07,030 It took me, like, an hour to come up with that. 30 00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:20,450 It's gotta be... 31 00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:23,980 ... Gary's... 32 00:02:26,900 --> 00:02:29,990 'Gary's Glitter Productions'. 33 00:02:31,110 --> 00:02:32,271 Hmm? 34 00:02:33,750 --> 00:02:35,692 He was a pedo. 35 00:02:38,280 --> 00:02:41,280 Oh. Yeah. 36 00:02:41,300 --> 00:02:42,900 Mm-hm. 37 00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:46,520 Yeah. 38 00:02:48,260 --> 00:02:49,860 Yeah, that wouldn't work. 39 00:02:50,790 --> 00:02:54,794 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 40 00:02:54,810 --> 00:02:56,020 - Here we are. - Thanks a lot. 41 00:02:56,040 --> 00:02:57,069 - Have a great day. - See you. 42 00:02:57,070 --> 00:02:58,280 'Bye. 43 00:03:38,180 --> 00:03:40,339 Buy a new bag, you cheap bastard. 44 00:03:42,020 --> 00:03:43,700 Wow, look at you, eh? 45 00:03:43,720 --> 00:03:45,193 How you going, mate? All right? 46 00:03:45,210 --> 00:03:47,597 What's this? When are you due? 47 00:03:47,610 --> 00:03:50,057 Piss off. 48 00:03:50,070 --> 00:03:52,380 - You good? - Oh, really good. Look at me. 49 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:54,187 So, when are you gonna come back and train? 50 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:57,770 Eh, I've been training at home. 51 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:01,950 So, how's Brucey? 52 00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:06,100 He passed, mate, about a year ago. 53 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:07,410 Oh, shit. 54 00:04:07,430 --> 00:04:08,950 - Yeah. - Sorry, mate. 55 00:04:10,140 --> 00:04:12,450 Oh, I heard he wasn't too good. 56 00:04:12,470 --> 00:04:14,620 - Yeah, yeah, so... - Ah, that's fucked. 57 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:16,484 Yeah, what are you gonna do, mate? You know... 58 00:04:16,500 --> 00:04:18,419 You holding up all right? 59 00:04:18,430 --> 00:04:20,046 Not too bad, you know. 60 00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:22,604 Come on. Hands up, hands up. 61 00:04:22,620 --> 00:04:24,550 This place hasn't changed. 62 00:04:24,570 --> 00:04:26,135 Just how I like it. 63 00:04:26,150 --> 00:04:28,107 How's Killy going? All right? 64 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:29,597 - He's good. Really good. - Yeah? 65 00:04:29,610 --> 00:04:31,030 Yeah. So, what about you? 66 00:04:31,050 --> 00:04:32,391 You still cracking heads? 67 00:04:33,930 --> 00:04:36,813 - Every now and then. - You're not getting any younger. 68 00:04:37,620 --> 00:04:39,020 What else am I gonna do? 69 00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:41,359 Start a gym? 70 00:04:41,370 --> 00:04:43,440 Yeah, but I gotta make some money. 71 00:04:44,500 --> 00:04:46,823 There's more important things than money. 72 00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:49,450 - Is there? - Yeah. 73 00:04:49,470 --> 00:04:51,725 This place hasn't made me rich, 74 00:04:51,740 --> 00:04:53,162 but I love what I do. 75 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:56,080 I love coming in here every day. 76 00:04:56,100 --> 00:04:58,270 - It's my life. - Mm. 77 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:01,664 Do you love what you do, aside from money? 78 00:05:01,680 --> 00:05:03,340 Come on! 79 00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:05,633 Not particularly. 80 00:05:06,930 --> 00:05:09,262 You've got to ask yourself, "Why am I doing it?" 81 00:05:18,580 --> 00:05:21,384 Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! 82 00:07:17,060 --> 00:07:20,650 Piu-piu! Piu-piu! 83 00:07:22,870 --> 00:07:24,280 Piu! 84 00:07:33,800 --> 00:07:35,260 Piu. 85 00:07:44,300 --> 00:07:47,030 Thought you were pretty smart, didn't you? 86 00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:49,672 Well, time to die. 87 00:07:57,820 --> 00:07:59,390 Oh, fuck. 88 00:09:17,970 --> 00:09:19,630 Oh, shit. 89 00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:34,985 - What's going on? - Nothing. 90 00:09:34,990 --> 00:09:38,374 Couldn't get the passionfruit yoghurt, all right? 91 00:09:38,390 --> 00:09:39,880 So... 92 00:10:15,290 --> 00:10:17,570 Hey. 93 00:10:19,210 --> 00:10:20,860 Come inside. 94 00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:32,140 'Sup? 95 00:10:33,560 --> 00:10:34,962 You tell me. 96 00:10:34,980 --> 00:10:36,630 What? 97 00:10:43,150 --> 00:10:45,014 It's not mine. 98 00:10:45,030 --> 00:10:46,644 Cut the crap, Princess. 99 00:10:46,660 --> 00:10:48,140 It's yours, not mine. 100 00:10:50,260 --> 00:10:52,220 Why are you such a smart-arse all of a sudden? 101 00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:54,106 Why do you have a gun? 102 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:55,934 Doesn't matter why I got a gun. 103 00:10:55,950 --> 00:10:57,789 What matters is you shouldn't be playing with it. 104 00:10:57,790 --> 00:10:59,243 If you didn't have a gun, 105 00:10:59,260 --> 00:11:01,488 then I wouldn't be playing with it, now, would I? 106 00:11:07,060 --> 00:11:09,288 - So, where's the hole? - What hole? 107 00:11:09,300 --> 00:11:11,480 The hole you made when you fired the pistol. 108 00:11:34,700 --> 00:11:37,358 How do you know I fired it? 109 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:39,730 Smell the gunpowder. 110 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,820 So, why have you got a gun? 111 00:11:44,300 --> 00:11:47,034 - Burglars. - Burglars? 112 00:11:47,050 --> 00:11:48,924 Yeah, you know what burglars are, don't you? 113 00:11:48,940 --> 00:11:50,037 Can we go shooting? 114 00:11:51,680 --> 00:11:54,290 - Nup. - Why not? 115 00:11:54,310 --> 00:11:55,780 'Cause I said. 116 00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,160 Please! 117 00:11:59,180 --> 00:12:00,610 Nup. 118 00:12:18,980 --> 00:12:20,484 If you took me shooting, 119 00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:22,660 then, you know, you can teach me and stuff. 120 00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:26,610 Don't go in my room again, all right? 121 00:12:26,630 --> 00:12:29,868 Huh? Don't eye-roll me. 122 00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:31,912 - Cut it out, I said. - My eyes are closed. 123 00:12:31,930 --> 00:12:33,789 How can I eye-roll when my eyes are closed? 124 00:12:34,700 --> 00:12:37,800 I don't know, but I know you're doing it. 125 00:12:38,500 --> 00:12:39,880 - What a jerk. - 'Scuse me? 126 00:12:39,900 --> 00:12:41,280 Nothing. 127 00:12:53,620 --> 00:12:55,824 How do I know your medicine is true medicine? 128 00:12:55,840 --> 00:12:57,104 Very easy. 129 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,740 Get some 20 hunters with me. 130 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:06,200 When all is ready, I will rob the base... 131 00:13:26,070 --> 00:13:27,640 There's a very pleasant cross-breeze 132 00:13:27,660 --> 00:13:29,090 here at the ground... 133 00:13:29,110 --> 00:13:31,760 Mm, Superman, right? 134 00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:35,180 He's flying around, cruising around Metropolis, 135 00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:37,090 looking for bad guys, right? 136 00:13:37,110 --> 00:13:39,772 He's flying around, flying around. 137 00:13:39,790 --> 00:13:42,073 And all of a sudden, he looks down. 138 00:13:42,090 --> 00:13:44,750 - He sees Wonder Woman, right? - Mm, mm. 139 00:13:44,770 --> 00:13:46,153 She's starkers. 140 00:13:46,170 --> 00:13:48,580 Buck naked, all oiled up, 141 00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:51,214 sunbaking on top of this building. 142 00:13:51,230 --> 00:13:52,993 - Right? - Mm-hm. Mm. 143 00:13:53,010 --> 00:13:55,720 Straightaway, instant boner. 144 00:13:55,740 --> 00:13:58,754 Cracks a fat. Super fat, right? 145 00:13:58,770 --> 00:14:02,380 He thinks to himself, "With my super speed, 146 00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:05,920 "I could fly down there, root her, 147 00:14:05,940 --> 00:14:07,820 "give her a quick couple of pumps 148 00:14:07,840 --> 00:14:10,109 and then be out of there before she even knows what hit her." 149 00:14:10,110 --> 00:14:11,512 - Huh? - Mm. Mm. 150 00:14:11,530 --> 00:14:14,620 So, he zooms down, 10,000 miles an hour, 151 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:16,519 gives her a quick couple of pumps, blows his load 152 00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:17,989 and he's gone in, like, half a second, 153 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:19,061 - right? - Yeah. 154 00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:20,479 Wonder Woman jumps to her feet and goes, 155 00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:22,213 "What the fuck was that?!" 156 00:14:22,230 --> 00:14:23,480 The Invisible Man goes, 157 00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:26,443 "I don't know, but my arsehole's fucking killing me." 158 00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:32,723 Fucked him up the arse. 159 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:39,939 ... beautifully, right off the meat of the bat. 160 00:14:39,940 --> 00:14:41,700 Superman would be able to see him, though. 161 00:14:42,640 --> 00:14:45,214 No, he wouldn't. He's invisible. 162 00:14:45,230 --> 00:14:49,120 Yeah, but, like, in real life, 163 00:14:49,140 --> 00:14:52,344 'cause he's got that fuckin', um, X-ray vision. 164 00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:55,700 Yeah, but X-ray vision helps you to see through shit. 165 00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:57,820 It doesn't help you to see stuff that's invisible. 166 00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:03,120 What about that heat vision thing he's got? 167 00:15:03,140 --> 00:15:04,380 He sees infrared 168 00:15:04,390 --> 00:15:05,409 - and all that kind of crap. - Oh, mate, 169 00:15:05,410 --> 00:15:08,819 it's a joke. It's a joke. 170 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:15,420 What does the Starship 'Enterprise' 171 00:15:15,447 --> 00:15:17,140 and toilet paper have in common? 172 00:15:17,170 --> 00:15:18,871 Don't know. What? 173 00:15:19,940 --> 00:15:21,874 They both search Uranus for Klingons. 174 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,093 - Eh. - Don't like it? 175 00:15:27,110 --> 00:15:28,589 Eh, it's not bad. 176 00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:30,600 Superman joke's better. 177 00:15:30,620 --> 00:15:31,780 Mm. 178 00:15:34,060 --> 00:15:37,610 Oh, mate... 179 00:15:38,740 --> 00:15:41,000 ... I know you just got out, 180 00:15:41,020 --> 00:15:43,312 - but I need you to do me a favour. - Here we go. 181 00:15:44,430 --> 00:15:46,140 I need you to go to my house, 182 00:15:46,160 --> 00:15:47,890 grab something for me. 183 00:15:48,750 --> 00:15:50,483 What? 184 00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:52,720 - You know my stash spot? - Mm. 185 00:15:54,170 --> 00:15:58,300 I need you to go in there and grab the black plastic bag. 186 00:15:59,050 --> 00:16:02,020 What's in it? Your pee-pee movies? 187 00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:03,900 - No, I've already got those. - Oh, good. 188 00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:07,169 - Just grab the black bag. - All right. 189 00:16:07,180 --> 00:16:10,370 Thanks, mate. I appreciate it. 190 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:36,199 _ 191 00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:37,780 In you come. 192 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:39,700 ? And I don't know ? 193 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:44,581 ? If I could stand another hand upon you ? 194 00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,223 ? All I know is that... ? 195 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:48,502 Hello, Ray. 196 00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:50,790 How you going? 197 00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:53,757 Where are these things you need? 198 00:16:53,770 --> 00:16:55,220 Basement. 199 00:17:01,330 --> 00:17:02,933 After you. 200 00:17:46,780 --> 00:17:48,186 You right? 201 00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:50,230 Are you right? 202 00:17:56,020 --> 00:17:58,030 Future's female, is it? 203 00:17:58,050 --> 00:17:59,580 Sure is. 204 00:18:12,380 --> 00:18:16,480 What's in the bag, Ray? Your pee-pee movies? 205 00:18:18,780 --> 00:18:19,840 They were Gary's. 206 00:18:35,326 --> 00:18:36,740 How'd you go? 207 00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:39,988 Tat's new boyfriend's a bit of a cunt. 208 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,540 Mm. Should have shot her. 209 00:18:41,560 --> 00:18:42,973 Yeah. 210 00:18:42,990 --> 00:18:44,451 So, what's this? 211 00:18:44,470 --> 00:18:46,745 Open it. 212 00:18:56,340 --> 00:18:57,790 What is it? 213 00:18:57,810 --> 00:19:01,093 - A Vajankle. - A what? 214 00:19:01,110 --> 00:19:02,886 A Vajankle. 215 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,620 What do you do with it? 216 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:07,170 You jerk off with it. 217 00:19:09,140 --> 00:19:10,560 You've had your cock in this? 218 00:19:10,580 --> 00:19:12,770 Yeah. Oi! 219 00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:15,530 Here, here, here, have a look. 220 00:19:15,550 --> 00:19:18,160 See? You put your cock in it. 221 00:19:18,180 --> 00:19:21,900 You put your cock in this part with the vagina 222 00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,850 and then you play with the foot. 223 00:19:31,910 --> 00:19:33,709 What? 224 00:19:34,850 --> 00:19:37,796 Why would you put your cock in a foot? 225 00:19:37,810 --> 00:19:39,900 'Cause I've got a foot fetish. 226 00:19:46,550 --> 00:19:48,704 You need help, mate. 227 00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:51,140 Don't knock it till you try it, Ray. 228 00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:53,620 - Hello? - Hey, Ray, you free? 229 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:54,850 Yeah, mate, what's up? 230 00:19:54,870 --> 00:19:56,960 I've got a job for you. 231 00:19:56,980 --> 00:19:59,430 Okay. What is it? 232 00:20:34,310 --> 00:20:36,020 This way. 233 00:20:41,450 --> 00:20:42,760 Just down here. 234 00:20:55,130 --> 00:20:56,360 In here. 235 00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:12,430 Just gonna stand there, are you? 236 00:21:14,980 --> 00:21:16,900 What happened? 237 00:21:16,920 --> 00:21:20,069 Does it fuckin' matter? Look, get this bitch out of here. 238 00:21:20,070 --> 00:21:22,070 My folks are gonna be home in, like, an hour or so. 239 00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:26,696 She's somebody's daughter, fuckhead. 240 00:21:30,940 --> 00:21:32,070 Get around that side. 241 00:21:36,820 --> 00:21:38,250 - Lift her up. - Yep. 242 00:21:58,450 --> 00:22:00,280 Go around. 243 00:22:12,100 --> 00:22:14,490 - Get the door. - Okay. 244 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:30,510 How'd you go? 245 00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:33,470 Yeah, good. 246 00:22:33,490 --> 00:22:35,173 What do you want me to do with it? 247 00:22:35,190 --> 00:22:38,268 Take it out to Dural. Bramble Road, lot three. 248 00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:42,270 There's a piggery out the back of the farmhouse there. 249 00:22:44,300 --> 00:22:46,720 Feed it to the pigs. 250 00:22:48,910 --> 00:22:50,200 Okay. 251 00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:27,799 Hey, Samantha C. How are you tonight? 252 00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:30,000 Hello, Steve. Thanks for taking my call. 253 00:23:30,020 --> 00:23:31,049 My pleasure, darling. 254 00:23:31,050 --> 00:23:32,860 Now, tell us all how you met 255 00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:34,640 your sweetheart, Lachlan C. 256 00:23:34,660 --> 00:23:36,700 Well, I was on the train home one night 257 00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:39,360 and I was carrying a big stack of stuff... 258 00:23:45,100 --> 00:23:46,619 ... between me and the groper 259 00:23:46,620 --> 00:23:48,640 and kind of protected me, you know? 260 00:23:48,660 --> 00:23:49,880 And that was Lachlan. 261 00:23:49,900 --> 00:23:52,257 - Your knight in shining armour. - Yeah, we... 262 00:24:57,530 --> 00:25:00,368 Samantha, this is a fantastic romantic story. 263 00:25:00,380 --> 00:25:03,553 I really hope your fears are unfounded. 264 00:25:07,900 --> 00:25:11,600 Stay with us here at Radio 1128 for better music like this: 265 00:25:11,620 --> 00:25:14,040 'Stay With Me (Baby)', Lorraine Ellison. 266 00:25:18,980 --> 00:25:25,930 ? Where did you go ? 267 00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:31,960 ? When things went wrong, baby? ? 268 00:25:31,980 --> 00:25:36,240 ? Who did you run to... ? 269 00:25:36,270 --> 00:25:39,320 ? And find a shoulder ? 270 00:25:39,340 --> 00:25:43,140 ? To lay your head upon? ? 271 00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:49,040 ? Baby, wasn't I there? ? 272 00:25:49,060 --> 00:25:56,380 ? Didn't I take good care of you? ? 273 00:25:56,400 --> 00:26:03,879 ? No, no, I can't believe you're leaving me ? 274 00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:05,369 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 275 00:26:05,370 --> 00:26:10,269 ? Stay with me, baby ? 276 00:26:10,270 --> 00:26:16,020 ? Please stay with me, baby ? 277 00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:20,220 ? Oh, stay with me, baby ? 278 00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:27,000 ? I can't go on ? 279 00:26:27,890 --> 00:26:33,704 ? Who did you touch ? 280 00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:39,660 ? When you needed tenderness? ? 281 00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:44,580 ? I gave you so much ? 282 00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:47,400 ? And in return ? 283 00:26:47,420 --> 00:26:51,938 ? I found happiness... ? 18858