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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:08,280 This programme contains strong language 2 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:14,080 BELL DINGS 3 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:24,560 I'm in the lift, Curt. Calm down. 4 00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:26,880 I can't hear you. 5 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:28,880 Is that him shouting in the background? 6 00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:32,120 I'll be one minute. Tell him I'll be one minute. 7 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:33,400 - Going up. 8 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:40,840 Can't keep away, Mr Bedford? 9 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:44,000 - I've been summoned by his nibs. 10 00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:49,440 - You're a better man than me. 11 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:10,560 - God! Thank God! Where have you been? 12 00:01:10,560 --> 00:01:13,040 - It's my night off, Curt. It's none of your business. 13 00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:14,760 What's going on? Where are all the guests? 14 00:01:14,760 --> 00:01:15,800 - He told them to go. 15 00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:18,000 - Oh, no. Was he polite about it? 16 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:20,480 FROM OTHER ROOM: - Two-faced bunch of pricks, the lot of you! 17 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:22,000 - I've had enough of it, Urban. 18 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:24,200 - He's not well. - Oh, you don't say. 19 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:25,320 Look at my heart rate. 20 00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:27,920 I've been beeping like a reversing lorry all afternoon. 21 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:30,360 My doctor told me to avoid stressful situations. 22 00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:31,960 - Where's the locum? - Gone. 23 00:01:31,960 --> 00:01:33,720 - Already? That was quick. 24 00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:35,640 - I know. He couldn't get out fast enough. 25 00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:37,160 - Well, how long did he stick it? 26 00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:39,840 - He only came at four, and he was gone before Pointless started. 27 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:42,640 - DISTANTLY: - Standing about pretending you all give a fuck! 28 00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:44,760 I don't even know who half of you are! 29 00:01:44,760 --> 00:01:45,800 I didn't invite you! 30 00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:47,880 - Did you give him anything to calm him down? 31 00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:49,240 - Do you mean him, or the locum? 32 00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:50,480 - Him, in there! 33 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:52,680 - No. He was asking for his opioids, 34 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,080 but I said he'd have to wait for you. - Good. 35 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:57,520 He's been in a foul mood all afternoon. 36 00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:00,880 - At one point, he said he wanted to see a priest. - What? 37 00:02:00,880 --> 00:02:03,840 - Said he needed to confess something. - Oh, for goodness' sake, why? 38 00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:06,200 It's his birthday, he's not being hanged. - Huh! 39 00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:08,080 That'd be one way to shut him up. 40 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:11,000 He's been babbling about his old cases. Names I didn't know. 41 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,480 He said I had to light a candle for him. 42 00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:14,640 - Did he mean on his cake? 43 00:02:14,640 --> 00:02:17,680 - I've no idea. But he was desperate for you to be here. 44 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:19,560 said you were the only one who could help him. 45 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:21,640 I thought, "Ooh, no offence taken!" 46 00:02:21,640 --> 00:02:23,720 - He is just attention-seeking. 47 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:25,720 - Janine's made hunter chicken. 48 00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:28,240 I wanted to be home by half eight. - All right, Curt, you go. 49 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:30,320 You'll be fine if you make all your connections. 50 00:02:30,320 --> 00:02:32,560 - His birthday cake's in the kitchen, if you want any. 51 00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:35,560 I hope he chokes on it. - Curt, go. 52 00:02:35,560 --> 00:02:38,080 Love to Janine. - Thank you, Urban. 53 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:39,120 Thank God for you. 54 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:40,480 - LIFT DOOR CLOSES 55 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:51,640 - Bedford, where the fuck are you?! 56 00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:57,280 What do you think you're doing, 57 00:02:57,280 --> 00:02:59,080 just pissing off whenever it suits you? 58 00:02:59,080 --> 00:03:00,680 - Nice to see you too, Mr Webster. 59 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:03,280 - What do I even pay you for? - Oh, beats me. 60 00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:05,280 Force of habit by now, I expect. 61 00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:08,480 - Leaving me here to be looked after by the man in the fucking moon. 62 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:09,680 - Well, who's that, then? 63 00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:13,640 - Oh, that useless blob Curt drafted in. 64 00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:16,320 Had a head like a fucking globe. 65 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:18,960 - Mm. So, how many's that you've got through now? 66 00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:21,840 This needs changing. - Oh, God knows. 67 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:25,000 Eh, you were around the 30-mark, I think. 68 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:27,400 Yeah, you're the best of a bad bunch. 69 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,880 - Oh, high praise! 70 00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:31,960 No, it's fine, really. 71 00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:34,720 I'd much rather be back here than at my friend's concert. 72 00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:37,960 I've been dying to see you since, er, ooh, when was it? 73 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:39,440 Lunchtime today. 74 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:41,360 - Well, I AM dying, so... 75 00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:44,480 - It's your birthday! What're you so upset about? 76 00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:48,200 Is it because of last year, when I took you to that antique auction, 77 00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:49,600 and three people bid on you? 78 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:53,600 - Urban, please, may I have 50 milligrams of fentanyl? 79 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:56,000 - No, you may not, Mr Webster. 80 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,720 - You're a bastard! 81 00:03:57,720 --> 00:04:00,280 - Not for another three hours. 82 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:03,600 And don't think you can get round me by using my first name. 83 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:06,520 - Curt tells me you're always calling him by his first name. 84 00:04:06,520 --> 00:04:08,120 - It won't work with me. 85 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:11,880 - Oh, that's not what I'm calling him. - Rude. 86 00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:14,560 - This is supposed to be palliative care, 87 00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:16,960 not some kind of prolonged torture. 88 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:19,120 - Well, someone should've read the small print, then. 89 00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:21,200 I don't think you can have one without the other. 90 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:23,680 You've got your patch on, that's supposed to tide you over. 91 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:27,000 - It's not touching the fucking sides any more. 92 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,720 I'm burning alive here. 93 00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:32,560 You're meant to provide me with... - Open. 94 00:04:33,840 --> 00:04:35,520 - You're a bully. - Shush. 95 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:41,200 I like taking your temperature. - Mm? 96 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:43,680 - Stops you talking for a minute. - Oh! 97 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:47,720 - I'm sorry about your pills. 98 00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:50,920 If I give you any more right now, you'd overdose and die. 99 00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:53,480 How about I bring you a nice piece of birthday cake? 100 00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:56,040 I'll blow your candles out for you. We can pretend you did it. 101 00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:58,040 - I haven't got time for this! 102 00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:00,960 - Oh, really? What else are you up to? 103 00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:02,600 You off rock climbing? 104 00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:04,880 Got some scuba diving booked I don't know about? 105 00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:07,600 - You shouldn't make jokes at my expense. 106 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:10,160 I have some very powerful friends. 107 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:14,040 - You used to have! You told 'em all to go forth and multiply, didn't ya? 108 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,400 You're feverish. I'm not happy. 109 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:18,800 - What time is it, in real life? 110 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:21,160 - Time you stopped babbling and calmed yourself down. 111 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:23,200 I'll get you a flannel. 112 00:05:23,200 --> 00:05:25,560 - What was this concert you missed? 113 00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:28,120 - Oh, it doesn't matter, it's done now. - Oh, just tell me! 114 00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:31,040 Why do you have to make everything so fucking exhausting? 115 00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:37,800 - My friend Dolly plays clarinet with the BBC Concert Orchestra. 116 00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,440 She had a solo tonight at the Royal Albert Hall. 117 00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:42,360 I had tickets booked, that's all. 118 00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:44,920 - Well, how much was the ticket? I'll reimburse you. 119 00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:47,000 - It was a comp. That's not the point, is it? 120 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:48,560 It was Dolly's big night. 121 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:51,280 She'd have appreciated my support. Lift up. 122 00:05:51,280 --> 00:05:54,000 - Well...I appreciate your support. 123 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:55,800 - Yeah, I know you do. 124 00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:58,440 But I get to see you every day, don't I? 125 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:00,400 She might never get to do that again. 126 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:03,240 But I'd put money on me getting a few more goes at wiping your bum. 127 00:06:03,240 --> 00:06:07,960 - Oh, God...it's so humiliating to me to hear that. 128 00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:11,160 You shame me. - I'm only joking. 129 00:06:11,160 --> 00:06:13,040 I've never bet on anything in me life. 130 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,160 - Oh, that doesn't surprise me. 131 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:17,600 You don't fucking swear either, do you? 132 00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:21,000 - I have been known to blurt out "fiddlesticks" in moments of crisis. 133 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:22,400 - Remarkable. 134 00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,760 You are such a kind soul. 135 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:28,360 - I'm not really. It's just a front. 136 00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:30,920 I just do nice things to balance it out. 137 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:32,960 Now, why did you get me back here tonight? 138 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:38,240 - Well, you've only ever known the ill version of me, 139 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:42,520 but I was very successful at a very early age. 140 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:46,120 When I was young and well, God, I... 141 00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:48,600 ..I lived my life with such vigour. 142 00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:50,920 - I know. I've read the articles. 143 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:54,920 A winning streak that lasted over 45 years. 144 00:06:54,920 --> 00:06:57,080 It's unheard of. You were fearless. 145 00:06:57,080 --> 00:06:59,640 The Lion of the Bailey, they called you. 146 00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:01,880 - I can't remember how I did it. 147 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:06,560 And, then, as you get older, this fucking timidity creeps in. 148 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:12,480 You get cowed by youth, overwhelmed by the self-confidence of others. 149 00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:15,320 - I bet it's just like riding a bike. 150 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:17,320 You just need warming up again. 151 00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:19,280 Show me how you used to do it. 152 00:07:19,280 --> 00:07:21,840 - Oh, don't be ridiculous. - No, come on, it'll be fun. 153 00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:24,080 And I'll get to see the Lion in action. 154 00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:26,000 - Lion? Dead cat, more like. 155 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:28,800 - I'll pick a crime, and then, you try and get me off. 156 00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:31,800 So to speak. - I am not in the mood. 157 00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:34,200 - I'll give you half a fentanyl. 158 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:35,600 - Very well. 159 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:41,960 So, Mr Bedford, what exactly are they accusing you of? 160 00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:44,560 - Ah, yes. Now, it's a rather delicate matter. 161 00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:45,960 - Go on. 162 00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:49,040 - Well, it's to do with an incident that happened last month 163 00:07:49,040 --> 00:07:50,360 with my ex-wife. 164 00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,240 - Wife?! 165 00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:55,440 This story is already stretching credulity. 166 00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:57,200 - Just go along with it. 167 00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:59,760 So, I turned up at her house, 168 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:02,920 where she was hosting a birthday party 169 00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:05,120 for our precious daughter Xylophone 170 00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:08,600 and, in a room full of 25 witnesses, 171 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:10,920 I pulled out a shotgun, I tied her up, 172 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:14,240 and I drove her to my isolated cottage, where I held her captive 173 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:16,520 until she agreed to give me custody. 174 00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:19,760 - Of your precious daughter, Xylophone? - Correct. 175 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,960 - And did she? - No. 176 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:24,160 So I shot her in the face. 177 00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:25,760 Right. 178 00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:28,840 Go on, then. How would you plead that? 179 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:31,640 - Well, lawful excuse. 180 00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:36,840 My client was cleaning his licensed hunting rifle in readiness 181 00:08:36,840 --> 00:08:41,160 for a grouse shoot when he genuinely mistook what turned out to be 182 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:45,200 the bursting of a children's party balloon for live fire. 183 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:47,440 Fearing for his wife's wellbeing, 184 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:50,080 he immediately drove her to a safe house in the country, 185 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:53,960 using a length of rope to prevent her from injuring herself 186 00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:55,560 on the journey. - Wow! 187 00:08:55,560 --> 00:08:57,720 - Furthermore, it is my intention 188 00:08:57,720 --> 00:09:02,920 to file a product liability claim for substandard party balloons 189 00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:07,240 with reference to British Standard 3303, part one. 190 00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:09,040 - How much for the claim? 191 00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:13,840 - I think we'd be happy to settle for five million, plus costs. 192 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:15,880 - Oh-ho-ho, get in! 193 00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:17,600 The Lion roars again! 194 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:18,880 THEY LAUGH 195 00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:21,040 You've still got it, Mr Webster! 196 00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:24,760 HE CHOKES 197 00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:24,760 Oh! 198 00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:27,880 HE COUGHS 199 00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:37,080 HE GASPS 200 00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:49,200 BREATHES DEEPLY 201 00:09:56,920 --> 00:10:00,560 - Well, thank you, Bedford, for this short diversion. 202 00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:06,160 But I need you to help me with something tonight. 203 00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:10,080 - Not another sudoku. - No, come on, I'm serious. 204 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:12,640 - And so am I. That's why I'm here with you, 205 00:10:12,640 --> 00:10:15,000 and not listening to my friend, Dolly, playing Mr Mozart. 206 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:17,280 - It's this birthday, this... 207 00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:19,000 Oh, the... 208 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,160 It's such a weight. 209 00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:23,000 I have to remember! 210 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,000 - If it's your age, it'll say on your cake. 211 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,880 Shall I go and fetch it? Two plates, pot of tea? 212 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:29,120 - No, bring me my Filofax. 213 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:32,280 - Why? Are we taking it on Antiques Road show? 214 00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:35,480 - Please! It's... it's in the cabinet, on the... 215 00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:37,120 ..in the top drawer. 216 00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:44,480 - Locked. 217 00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:47,040 I don't suppose you can recall where the key is. 218 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,720 - What do you think? You'll have to smash it open. 219 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:50,760 - I'm not doing that! 220 00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:52,840 I'm a trained nurse, I'm not a labourer. 221 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:55,160 - I have to read through my old cases. 222 00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:56,880 Something's troubling me. 223 00:10:56,880 --> 00:11:00,280 - Wait a minute. Before we go all World's Strongest Man... 224 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:03,320 ..do you remember where you keep your old barista uniform? 225 00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:06,680 - Barrister! And it's not a uniform. - Where is it? 226 00:11:06,680 --> 00:11:09,360 Cos I don't believe for a minute you've given it to Dogs Trust. 227 00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:11,920 - My robes and my wigs are in the back of that wardrobe. 228 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:14,280 - Ah! Oh, there you are, you see. 229 00:11:14,280 --> 00:11:17,040 No problem remembering where your frocks are. 230 00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,040 You've got your priorities right. 231 00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:20,560 - What? 232 00:11:20,560 --> 00:11:22,800 - What made you want to be a barrister in the first place? 233 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:24,880 Was it this costume? Be honest. - I don't know! 234 00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:27,560 Why does anyone do anything? 235 00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:29,960 Why did you end up doing this? 236 00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:32,320 - I've never liked filing cabinets. 237 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:35,600 Which is funny, cos you'd put them in the same camp as stationery, 238 00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:37,240 and I love stationery. 239 00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:39,040 - What are you talking about? 240 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:42,560 - I think they remind me of school. 241 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:47,760 Carl Jackson choking on a tangerine before home economics. 242 00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:53,200 I'll never forget how quickly he went blue. 243 00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:56,320 Carl was the school bully... 244 00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:57,920 ..so nobody wanted to help him. 245 00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:02,320 Everyone just stood about, eating crisps. 246 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:05,760 I tried smacking him on the back, sticking my fingers down his throat 247 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:09,000 - which I cringe at now, cos that's really not protocol, but... 248 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,520 ..I was 13. 249 00:12:14,440 --> 00:12:15,960 I didn't know what to do. 250 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:22,080 And I can still smell that orange. 251 00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:27,160 He died on the floor in front of me. 252 00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:31,880 They never even sent us home. 253 00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:36,560 We just made an apple crumble with Miss Phillipson 254 00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:37,960 like nothing had happened. 255 00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:42,320 So, in answer to your question, 256 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:45,280 I think that's why I've ended up doing what I'm doing. 257 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,920 Spent my life trying to save Carl Jackson. 258 00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:50,960 Ah! 259 00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:54,080 There we are. 260 00:12:54,080 --> 00:12:56,320 I knew I'd find one. 261 00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:57,760 Just like in the films. 262 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:10,320 Ta-da! How about that, Hetty Wainthropp Investigates?! 263 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:12,200 - Wait! 264 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:15,040 Don't open it. - What? Why not? 265 00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:17,560 - I don't want you to. I've changed my mind. 266 00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:18,960 - Oh, you're joking. 267 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:21,280 - There's something terrible in there. 268 00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:23,640 One of my old cases, something I did. 269 00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:26,360 A weight. 270 00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:29,080 - Well, we can't leave it at that, can we? I'm opening it. 271 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:30,400 OPENS DRAWER 272 00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:33,160 HE GASPS 273 00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:33,160 - What is it? 274 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:34,360 - Oh, my God. 275 00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:38,960 Human head! 276 00:13:38,960 --> 00:13:41,360 Oh, Mr Webster, who is this? What did you do? 277 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,840 - Stop it! What is in there? 278 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:47,880 - Nothing. Just files, letters, diaries. 279 00:13:47,880 --> 00:13:49,720 Nothing too scary, by the look of it. 280 00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:51,320 HE GROANS 281 00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:53,320 All right, Mr Webster. 282 00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:55,760 That is enough excitement for one day. 283 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:56,800 - You have to help me. 284 00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:59,160 - I will help you, but you need to rest. 285 00:13:59,160 --> 00:14:02,160 - No, I don't want to sleep. You don't understand. 286 00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:04,600 What...? 287 00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:06,520 What have you...? 288 00:14:06,520 --> 00:14:08,440 - WEAK GROANS 289 00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:20,280 MUSIC PLAYING 290 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:48,960 CLOCK TICKING 291 00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:54,280 THUD 292 00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:27,520 CHOKING 293 00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:36,280 CHOKING CONTINUES 294 00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:47,520 CHOKING AND STRUGGLING 295 00:16:47,520 --> 00:16:48,880 No! Don't, no! 296 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:55,280 Don't! No! 297 00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:56,960 Don't! 298 00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:58,800 HE SCREAMS 299 00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:00,280 HE GASPS 300 00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:05,480 - I thought it was me that needed sleep. 301 00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:06,520 - Sorry. 302 00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:11,400 Bad dream. 303 00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:13,640 - Well, you found it. 304 00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:16,400 After all this time. 305 00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:19,840 - The Crown versus Andrew Waite. 306 00:17:19,840 --> 00:17:22,640 - A rather ferrety-looking man, 307 00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:25,880 accused of strangling his mistress with a belt. 308 00:17:25,880 --> 00:17:28,520 Everyone knew he was guilty. 309 00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:32,720 And it looked like another defeat in my dead-end career. 310 00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:34,640 - But you got him off. 311 00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:40,480 - Mm. I came across a piece of evidence - 312 00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:45,600 a photograph of Mr Waite attending a party 80 miles away. 313 00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:49,560 It was a cast-iron alibi and I played it for all it was worth. 314 00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:51,920 I dazzled that jury. 315 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:53,520 There were fireworks. 316 00:17:53,520 --> 00:17:56,280 Mr Waite was released that very day. 317 00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:00,200 - But you said he was guilty. 318 00:18:01,520 --> 00:18:04,480 - The photograph was a fake. 319 00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:07,320 I obtained it by immoral means. 320 00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:12,680 I let a guilty man walk free. 321 00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:17,240 It's haunted me ever since. 322 00:18:20,120 --> 00:18:23,920 - You've probably never seen Frozen, 323 00:18:23,920 --> 00:18:26,200 Mr Webster, but... 324 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:29,760 ..you've got to make like Elsa and let it go. 325 00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:33,520 If you've done something unforgiveable... 326 00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:36,760 ..you just have to forgive yourself. 327 00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:40,360 - Do you forgive me, Urban? 328 00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:44,680 - Course I do. 329 00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:49,200 - Oh, what have I done to deserve you? 330 00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:53,080 Is it nearly midnight? 331 00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:55,000 - Five to. Why? 332 00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:57,000 - He'll be here soon. 333 00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:58,320 - Who? 334 00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,000 - Threescore years ago, 335 00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:22,840 I signed this contract. 336 00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:24,720 But, tonight, my time is up. 337 00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:28,840 - What are you talking about? I'll get you a fentanyl. 338 00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:33,160 - How do you think I became so successful...overnight? 339 00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:37,560 How did I come into possession of that impossible piece of evidence? 340 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:40,000 - LOUD THUD 341 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:40,000 - It was... 342 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:41,160 Oh, no. 343 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:43,640 - It's all right, Mr Webster, it's only a power cut. 344 00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:46,160 Your machines have their own generator. You'll be fine. 345 00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:47,280 - God forgive me! 346 00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:49,600 - Look, I just need to go and flick the circuits, 347 00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,440 but I've got to go to the other room. 348 00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,680 - Don't leave me! Please! 349 00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:55,200 - I'll be right back. 350 00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:17,800 Fuck! 351 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:20,760 - Bedford! What's going on? What's that noise? 352 00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:22,160 - It's all right, Mr Webster. 353 00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:25,000 Stay where you are. It's dark. I don't want you to fall. 354 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:33,040 CLOCK CHIMES 355 00:20:38,120 --> 00:20:41,640 CLOCK CHIMES 356 00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:54,440 CLOCK TOLLS THE HOUR 357 00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,080 FINAL TOLL ECHOES 358 00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:19,560 CLICK 359 00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:23,800 LIFT STOPS 360 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,360 Hello? 361 00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:42,640 ATTENDANT: - How are you doing, Mr Bedford? 362 00:21:42,640 --> 00:21:44,280 Everything all right in there? 363 00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:46,000 - Ah! Thank goodness, yes. 364 00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,680 I was just about to call you. What's happened? 365 00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:50,560 - Power's out right across town. 366 00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,080 How's Mr Webster? Is he OK? 367 00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:56,120 - He's good. 368 00:21:56,120 --> 00:21:58,320 We, er, had a bit of a rough night. 369 00:21:58,320 --> 00:21:59,680 A trip down memory lane. 370 00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:02,320 He got a bit...overemotional. 371 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:05,400 - Special occasions can do that to people, I suppose. 372 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,240 - They can. 373 00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:16,760 So, how are you? Busy night, I expect. 374 00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,840 - I can't be everywhere at once, but I try. 375 00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:21,480 No rest for the wicked. 376 00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:25,520 - Do you think everything'll go back to normal soon? 377 00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:27,440 - I'm not sure. 378 00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:30,000 We may be in the dark... 379 00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:32,600 ..a little while longer yet. 380 00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,200 - Right. 381 00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:36,800 My eyes are starting to adjust. 382 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:38,200 - Mine, too. 383 00:22:46,360 --> 00:22:47,920 - Oh, dear. 384 00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:50,680 It is you, isn't it? 385 00:22:51,880 --> 00:22:54,000 Mr Mistoffelees. 386 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:57,440 Oh...sorry, no, that's Cats. 387 00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:58,880 What do you want? 388 00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:00,320 - He's had his life. 389 00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:04,120 I've come for what I'm owed. 390 00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:07,640 Webster! 391 00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,200 - Oh, God. 392 00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:16,280 - I'm afraid not. 393 00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:18,120 It's good to see you again. 394 00:23:18,120 --> 00:23:19,800 It's been a long time. 395 00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:23,960 - Please! I'd like to... renegotiate my contract. 396 00:23:23,960 --> 00:23:25,720 I'm not ready to go. 397 00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:28,800 - Well, no-one ever is, but, erm... 398 00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:30,280 ..a deal's a deal. 399 00:23:31,600 --> 00:23:35,520 - Can I say something... in his defence? 400 00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:37,320 - Proceed. 401 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:39,640 - I'm his nurse. 402 00:23:39,640 --> 00:23:41,840 I've looked after him for five years. 403 00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:45,160 I've seen him deal with all this sickness, all this pain. 404 00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:47,840 - I know! It's been splendid. 405 00:23:47,840 --> 00:23:50,320 And I've had a ringside seat. 406 00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:53,120 - He's led a good life. - He has. 407 00:23:53,120 --> 00:23:57,000 He helped free into the world so many destructive people. 408 00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:59,880 - I don't think he's such a bad man. 409 00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:02,240 A bit grouchy sometimes. 410 00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:04,720 - That's very forgiving of you. 411 00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:07,040 - I try to be a decent person. 412 00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:08,880 - There's no accounting for taste. 413 00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:13,520 - I don't suppose there's anything I could say that would 414 00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:14,760 get him off the hook? 415 00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:18,200 - There's no need to plea bargain on my account, Bedford. 416 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:21,880 I was one of the country's best criminal defence lawyers 417 00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:23,800 for 50 years, remember. 418 00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:26,720 - I'm just trying to help you. - And you have. 419 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:30,800 For the past five years, you've been an angel on Earth. 420 00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:32,760 A beacon of light. 421 00:24:32,760 --> 00:24:34,680 Just think... 422 00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:40,520 ..his kind soul would burn far more brightly than mine. 423 00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:41,880 - What are you suggesting? 424 00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:48,120 - In civil law, there is a thing called substitution. 425 00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:52,200 It is the putting of one person in the place of another so that he may, 426 00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:54,440 in default of ability in the former, 427 00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:57,840 have the benefit of a devise... 428 00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:00,120 ..or legacy. 429 00:25:00,120 --> 00:25:03,680 - In other words, I take him instead. 430 00:25:03,680 --> 00:25:06,480 - Mr Webster! What are you doing? 431 00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:09,080 - I let you discover my secret, 432 00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:13,320 and you still forgave me - just as I hoped. 433 00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:14,480 - Let me see. 434 00:25:15,880 --> 00:25:17,960 - What if I want to object, Your Honour? 435 00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:20,360 - Objection is for American courts. 436 00:25:20,360 --> 00:25:23,760 Here, I would just remind my learned friend 437 00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:26,440 not to lead the witness. 438 00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:28,120 - I'm really not that good a person. 439 00:25:28,120 --> 00:25:31,120 - In comparison to me, you are a saint. 440 00:25:31,120 --> 00:25:34,920 - And that is what makes it so delicious. 441 00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:37,280 - I never even got you a birthday present. 442 00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:39,400 - I forgive you. 443 00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:41,000 - Congratulations, Mr Webster, 444 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:43,560 you've got yourself a stay of execution. 445 00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:45,920 His contract is now your legacy. 446 00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:47,560 You have the pen still? 447 00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:48,960 - Oh, yes. 448 00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:15,560 - All done. 449 00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:16,840 - What? 450 00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:19,720 - Yes, and the agreed addendum? No more pain? 451 00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:22,360 - Yes, yes. Your recovery will be remarkable. 452 00:26:22,360 --> 00:26:26,560 - Ah. - As you know, Bedford, illness - proper illness, the dying kind - 453 00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:28,720 never occurs to the young. 454 00:26:28,720 --> 00:26:30,400 Doesn't exist, even. 455 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:34,080 But my older clients all know pain. 456 00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:36,440 They all specify health in the end years. 457 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,360 After all, that's all you've really got, isn't it? 458 00:26:39,360 --> 00:26:43,560 - What a relief! I feel better already. 459 00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:47,160 Goodbye, Urban, and thank you for everything. 460 00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:50,320 I hope you get to see the rest of your concert. 461 00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:52,960 I'm told the Devil has the best tunes. 462 00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:55,280 - HE CHUCKLES 463 00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:55,280 - Shall we? 464 00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:57,600 - Oh! No, this isn't fair. 465 00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:02,000 Mr Webster! You're making a mistake! 466 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:04,240 - Told you earlier. 467 00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:05,880 You're a better man than me. 468 00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:07,240 - I'm... 469 00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:10,960 ..really not. 470 00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:15,400 - Oh, I see. 471 00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:25,920 - Wha...wha...what's happening? 472 00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:27,760 - A late development. 473 00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:31,240 Something I missed - from Bedford's schooldays. 474 00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:34,800 - To be fair, you did say you couldn't be everywhere at once. 475 00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:36,960 - That's true. 476 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,080 - What is it? 477 00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:42,680 - Carl Jackson wasn't the school bully. 478 00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:44,960 I was. 479 00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:48,200 I stuffed a tangerine down his throat... 480 00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:50,160 ..because he answered me back one day. 481 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,240 I killed him for fun. 482 00:27:56,360 --> 00:27:58,960 Still have nightmares about it. 483 00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:02,640 I've tried to atone for it since, but... 484 00:28:02,640 --> 00:28:04,400 ..I'm no angel. 485 00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:07,840 - But...wh-what about my new contract? 486 00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:09,720 - Null and void, I'm afraid. 487 00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:12,800 Taking Bedford has lost all its currency. 488 00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:15,320 - Oh, no, no, no, no, please, please! 489 00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,120 Let's just talk about this. 490 00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:19,240 Surely we can come to some arrangement. 491 00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:22,000 - Goodbye, Mr Webster. 492 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,040 I'll be seeing you. 493 00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:25,840 - Oh, you most certainly will. 494 00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:28,880 Going down. 495 00:28:33,120 --> 00:28:35,320 - MR WEBSTER SCREAMS 496 00:28:35,370 --> 00:28:39,920 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36655

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