Original subtitles

This is DJ Hype from WBVQ,

radio El Paso,

coming to you on this steaming hot July morning.

By now I hope you got the grill hot,

the potato Southern cool and your liquor lit.

Today's broadcast is brought to you

by J. Lee's spicy barbecue sauce.

Put some J. Lee's on them smoky bones,

why don't you?

But first, you better call your momma,

'cause when you taste that flavor,

now you're gonna slap her.

Happy 4th of July, everybody

Keep it spicy out there.

Don't you-

- So, are you gonna do those dance moves

at the family reunion?

Sydney!

Mom.

- I'm trying to talk to you little girl.

- I almost had it.

- Answer my question before you almost get these belt.

- Jeez. Okay.

No, I'm not planning to go dancing like this

at the family reunion.

- I knew that you heard me.

- Love you.

No, no, no, no. You already busted.

- Mommy, why do we always have the family reunion here?

Why can't we do it in Orlando

or some place fun?

- Well, honey, we create our own fun.

Right?

- Mom, I'm too old for those kinds of answers,

there has to be a real reason.

- Oh, okay, Miss lady, I see you.

Look, there is a real reason,

but once we get to the house,

I'll talk to you about it, okay?

- Okay. Is my dad coming?

- I mean, I invited him.

- You guys had an argument, didn't you?

- No, no, we didn't have an argument.

It's just adult relationships are sometimes complicated.

And your dad, he's a good man.

- But you guys started dating and everything.

- Sydney, remember I talked to you

about grown folks' business.

Your dad, he's just busy.

And right now he's in Texas on business

and I left him a voicemail.

Look, honey we both know that your dad loves you very much.

Right? So if he can make it, he will, okay?

- Okay.

Hey Jeffrey see,

I just want to apologize for the other night.

Things have just been moving so fast

and I guess that, I've been hurt a few times

and I just don't wanna rush into anything.

Anyway, just come to the family reunion

and we'll figure things out. Okay?

See you soon.

- Where's all the people

and the 4th of July decorations?

- I honestly do not know.

Hey mom, where are you guys?

You're already supposed to be here.

Isn't dad bringing his famous barbecue ribs?

- Sweetheart, we're not coming.

What? You're joking

- Hey sweetie.

- Hey dad, what is mom talking about?

- You remember when I surprised your mother

with that adventure trip, in a Brazilian rainforest?

- He surprised himself.

You know I don't like camping and hiking

and all that kind of stuff.

- I thought it would be fun

and to expand our horizon.

- Oh, you expanded them all right.

- Look, well you guys got back last week.

- We were supposed to be back last week

but we are still here stuck in Brazil.

- What? Okay.

You guys are joking you're playing with me.

You got me.

- I'm afraid it's not a joke sweetheart.

- Tell her the best part.

- Babe, we don't need to worry her.

- Worry me about what?

- Tell her.

- We caught the Dengue fever.

- Dengue fever?

- Yes, dengue fever.

- It's a mosquito-borne tropical disease.

- It gives you a fever,

yeah, I got that part.

- Fever, diarrhea, headache, pain in my neck,

my back, my-

- Babe. - What?

Or what?

- So you're not coming to the family reunion again?

- Not unless we can go back into a time machine

and never go on this trip.

- Oh, at least you two are together.

You wouldn't wanna have Dengue fever alone,

now would you?

- I am, I guess you're right.

- Sometimes I hate how smart you are.

- Well, I'm gonna call you later. Okay?

I gotta try to figure out how to get some barbecue

to this family reunion.

I love you too.

Bye bye.

Hello, Aunt Mae? No way.

Yes it's today.

Okay, okay. I am on my way.

- Where are we going, mommy?

- To get your aunt and uncle.

Oh, you know what?

Before we go, there's something I wanna show you.

Okay?

So you remember you asked me why

we have our family reunions here every year?

Well, this is why.

You see, when your great-grandfather

was released from prison, for his wrongful conviction.

He ended up suing the government

and he won a lot of money.

So he started his own business with flipping homes

and this is the first home that he ever purchased.

And that's why it's so special to our family.

Do you think he'd be proud of us?

- Yeah. I know that he's proud of us

and everything that we've accomplished.

You know, sometimes I stay here

and I know that he's watching over us.

- Hey, what's up brother? How you doing?

I got some DVDs and oil for sale. DVDs and oils.

Who says you can't. You can't...

I got some DVDs and oils for sale.

Oils, you know what I'm saying? These got pheromones in it.

Pheromones!

Meaning you could get on the ferry,

and she gone mourn, all night long.

Now look, now you have these DVDs

and you put these oils together,

you gonna have a great night.

She gonna be going

* All night long, all night

* All night, all night long

* All night, all night.

- What you want player?

- I don't know, what you got?

- Just let me know, hands is magic.

- It's like that?

It's exactly like that

Somebody please tell this man.

- Oh in that case, let me get number one.

- Man, get out my chair.

* We're together, one love in the house *

* The house is out

* One love, forever

* One love

OG ,

What's up with that meal for another day man?

- Just another satisfied customer.

- Obviously, but come on OG.

She asked for you by name.

Now keep it real, partner. What's up, talk to me?

- Well, she came in

she was like,

"OG, I know you're a barber,

"I get paid on the 15th.

"Hook a sister up."

- So did you hook her up?

- I told her just like I tell all the girls.

I don't work for charities.

I don't work for free.

And if you wanna use these skills,

you gotta pay me something.

And I told her she had three choices.

She can give me some cash.

- Well?

- She can give me some grass.

Now you're talking.

- Or that ass.

- Well, hold on, hold on, hold on, wait.

OG, so you trying to tell me that you-

- She didn't have no grass either.

Oh.

- Not OG, bro.

- So where you been, brother?

We ain't seen you in a while.

You doing the same cut thing?

- I've been traveling a lot for work lately.

- This ain't no game, this for real,

'cause you keep cutting the back of your head,

it's gonna look like hamburger meat.

Oh, star crunching earthworm.

- This aint no game.

This for real.

Don't make me laugh.

- I like that commercial though.

If Jeffrey can't get you off, nobody can.

- I use that in the bed all the time.

That's my sexy talk with Ding.

- Whatever works, bro.

- Wait, did you say your girl's name was Ding?

- Yeah. What's wrong with that?

I like Asian women.

You see, fellas, once you go Asian,

it's always amazing.

- What's her last name?

- What's her last name?

You a Fed?

You sound like a Fed right now.

You acting real feddy, partner.

- It's just a simple question.

- It's Ling, okay? Its Ling.

- Wait, hold up.

Your girl's name is Ding Ling?

Dinger Ling?

- Hey, yo, yo, it aint that funny, bro.

Why you all laughing?

Where's the laughter coming from?

It aint all that funny.

Why you laughing?

It aint that funny.

- So look here, Jeff, man, real talk.

We appreciate what you're doing out there in them streets.

Them young brothers,

making sure they get a fair shake in the legal system,

that's good stuff, man.

- Just doing what I can.

- I feel you.

So what you doing for the 4th?

- Family reunion with my daughter's mom's family.

- Hold on, hold on, daughter?

I didn't know you had a daughter, man,

didn't even know was a dad.

- Me either.

- Yeah, it was kind of a surprise to me too.

I had a one night stand about nine years ago,

yeah, she didn't tell me about it.

Then my daughter found me on the internet.

So we've been playing catch up ever since.

- Internet! What's her family like?

- Pretty cool actually.

Very accomplished people, the dad is a doctor,

the mom a stay at home mom.

And then my daughter's mother is an attorney.

- Oh, wow, oh.

- Can the mama cook?

That's all I wanna know.

- Yeah, she could throw it out.

- Is there gonna be a DJ there,

with some big fat booties?

I guess.

- That's my type of party then.

- I got a couple of questions.

- Okay.

- Is she crazy?

'Cause ain't nothing like some crazy coochie.

Don't sleep.

- No, she's mad cool.

- You got a picture of her?

Damn!

- Hey, she bad.

- OG, what you do with that, boy?

- Ooh! That girl got everything.

- Yeah, she's pretty amazing?

- So what you waiting for hommie?

- Nothing. She, she not feeling me like that.

I mean, I'm in her rotation,

but she ain't taking me serious.

- Come on, man be for real.

She's a lawyer, you a lawyer.

And obviously you hooked on this woman.

- At least the best part of her,

- Like my granddaddy used to tell me man,

women they just like cars.

When you rent them, you can ride them however you want to.

But your ass gonna pay a high price.

And as soon as you get used to it a little bit,

try to take her right back, you know what I mean?

But when you buy,

now you get to ride it whenever you want

for a much lower price.

But, you gotta get used to those imperfections over time.

- Y'all broke asses probably put it on little wait anyway.

- Look here, man.

We've been in this game a long time,

from thots all the way back to skeezers.

I mean, eventually you gotta make a decision.

You keep all that banging and slanging,

your dick gonna fall off.

You know what I'm saying?

You got a fine good looking woman man, beautiful,

voluptuous, scrumptious

and she got a great big old juicy booty.

- Okay, okay, I get it.

- But I mean, look here, man.

She waited for a black King to swoop down

and sweep her off her feet.

You see never playing around, man.

Unless this woman's been living in a bubble.

She done met 5011, noncommittal, sorry, cheating,

unemployed, emotionally unavailable.

They all started out,

just like you.

Nice. She needed a man to decide.

You decide, and you decide what you're gon' do

for your family then you leave.

A woman like that,

she got a deep bench, man, look here.

If you ain't, the dude is going out there

and winning every day and blowing that back out

on a consistent basis,

you're going to be right back on the bench.

Watch what I tell you.

- Finally. It's not that I can agree to.

Amen to that.

- Preach. Tell him.

- He ain't lying.

While we are going to have,

booty shaking barbecue and steal that girl right from you.

Stop it,

- I am ready to take off again.

- Me too.

Stop it, you're nasty.

So, where's my little Sydney?

- Actually, I left her at a friend's house

because I didn't want her to see you two in this situation.

- Erica, I love your hair.

Did you do something different to it?

- I always do something different to my hair.

But thank you, Aunt Mae.

- Erica, you don't seem very happy to see us.

- Well, Uncle Victor, I thought I was picking you guys

up from the airport, not the police station.

I mean, the mile high club, guys, really?

- Yes.

Well, Erica you know that

you of all people already know about birds and the bees.

So I'll just tell you that,

your Aunty Mae and I we just, we got married so early.

Directly out of college.

We didn't have a chance to do all the crazy things

that 20 something year olds normally do.

- Sure did.

- To include having sex in the airplane bathroom

- You do know that's not a thing anymore, right?

- Well we made it.

- I made it a thing again, right?

- Yes, its amazing what you can do in a small space.

when you put your mind to it.

- I enjoy hips.

- Oh, love them hips baby.

- Okay, okay.

Can you pleas stop?

- How do you think my sister in-law made you?

- Please, Aunt Mae I, no. Please.

- Okay baby girl, we will behave.

I promise.

- Thank you.

Did you even consider how maybe this affects me?

- Affects you.

- Considering you, excuse me.

Yes.

- Did you even consider us when you

had a one night stand?

- A unprotected one night stand.

- Yeah, with Jeffrey Davidson?

- Mm-hmm. - Did you, did you?

Exactly, I didn't think so.

I rest my case.

Listen, baby girl, your aunt and I love each other.

- Yes we do, we do.

- We had some fun, we took a risk.

We got caught.

Yes we did.

- But we lived to talk about it.

- And you do know that you guys would be

in jail if weren't wealthy?

- And because we know our rights.

- And not everybody has that privilege.

- Well, that's why we are so proud of our beautiful,

intelligent and way too serious freedom fighting attorneys.

- Well, congratulations you guys made the paper.

- Oh! My goodness.

- Are you kidding me, what?

The paper? Get out. Let me read this.

- Look at this.

Oh, yeah.

Love is in the air.

- A couple in their sixties as being hailed

as an example of the love that stands the test of time.

Mae and Victor Carter- - That's us.

Were arrested this morning when

their plane touched down at Richmond International Airport.

The couple was charged with violation

of FAA regulations related to the use of airplane lavatory.

After a flight attendant caught them having sex.

The couple spent one night in jail

and the charges were dropped

for lack of sufficient evidence.

However, their lesson to society is clear.

Love is in the air.

- In the air, oh, my goodness.

- Yeah. And you know, if you guys were poor,

you would be on the way to prison right now.

- See, you and your brother created that monster.

- Monster?

- Listen, baby girl,

you know I am so proud

and happy that you became an attorney.

Just like your uncle Vic.

And you know the whole family is proud of you.

- Oh, yes.

- But.

- Here we go.

Yes.

Do you have the answers to all the problems in the country?

- No.

- Because if you do, then you don't need to be an attorney.

You need to be the President. And I mean that.

Listen. Nobody has all the answers, I don't.

But I live by three simple rules.

- Yes he does.

- Please my God, please my wife.

And support my community.

And on that plane, I was pleasing my wife.

Were you pleased, baby?

- Woo, baby, I was so pleased.

- That's right, you know we are.

- Okay, okay, you know what? You guys win, okay?

But can you please just keep it together

Please?

All right, deal.

Deal, deal.

- Thank you.

- So, how's your boyfriend/baby's father doing?

- Fine,

but he's not my boyfriend we're just friends.

- What, just friends?

- Yes.

- Just friends? - Yes.

- Lets see.

He is your baby's father.

He's a respected attorney in the community.

He's great with Sydney. - Yes.

- And every time I see him

he's treating you like, like some precious jewel.

Am I missing something?

- No, you've pretty much nailed it.

- You right.

- Then whats the problem Erica?

- I just don't wanna make the wrong decision.

People have a tendency to change up on you

and that's not what I want.

- Well, are you seeing someone else?

- No way, no thanks.

- Baby girl, take it from me, leave your past behind you

or your future will pass you by.

- Right.

- Don't you mean fly by?

- oh, yes fly by.

That's right, fly by.

- Oh man,

I can't wait to have some of my brothers barbecue.

- Angela's coconut cake.

- Yeah. - Woo!

- Yeah, so about that.

We'll talk about that later.

Ooh.

Thank you for calling Youfly Airlines.

My name is Benita.

How can i brighten your day today?

- Hi, Benita.

I'm trying to get a flight from El Paso, Texas

to Williamsburg, Virginia, first thing tomorrow morning.

And would that brighten your day?

- Huh?

Would it brighten your day if I book you a flight

from El Paso, Texas to Williamsburg,

Virginia for tomorrow morning?

- Yeah, I guess it would bright my day.

Then let's get your day bright.

Oh, okay, okay. I got it.

- Got it?

Yes and no.

- Yes and no?

Yes, I got it.

Like, I know what you want,

but no, we don't got any flights.

- No flights?

Well, it's 4th of July weekend

and there is a weather issue

in Atlanta that caused a lot of delays.

None of the airlines can sell any new flights

to Williamsburg until we get everyone already

purchased flights to their destination.

- Okay, so what's the closest you can get me

to Williamsburg?

Atlanta.

- Atlanta? That's like 10 hours drive from Williamsburg.

Atlanta is beautiful this time of year,

the road's are blossoming.

Even the high trains is.

- Our family reunion is in Virginia.

Maybe your family would like to reun

in Atlanta instead.

Like I said, it's beautiful.

- Yeah. You said that.

They got great food too.

You can pick me up some.

- And bad weather, apparently.

Yes, they did have this weather issue.

- What is the weather issue?

You know what? Don't even tell me.

You ain't know about this when you picked up the phone?

All that talking about you gon' make my day.

Brightening, it's brighten in your day.

- Whatever Benita, my day ain't bright and you ain't right.

Thanks for nothing.

Oh geez.

I'm driving. I'm driving. No flights?

Directions to Williamsburg, Virginia.

Getting directions to Williamsburg,

Virginia. - Damn.

I'ma need some coffee.

A lot of coffee.

- Family, I'm glad you all are here.

We've got a bit of a situation.

Well, my brother, Aaron and his wife are stuck

under quarantine in Brazil.

- Brazil?

- Yes, Brazil.

So, normally they host this event, but it's up to us now.

So, we've got to decorate,

cook everything in under two hours

before everybody gets here.

- Woo!

- So anybody who knows anything

about grilling, follow me.

- And if any of you can cook, follow me,

Erica you can come too.

- See you wrong for that, Aunt Mae

That's okay.

- Well, the potato salad you made the last time was hmm.

- You know what?

My man loves my potato salad.

- Ooh!

Vegan potato salad

- So he's your man now?

- Baby, what's part where all the women leave

and go to the kitchen and leave the man,

the fourth bond over manship?

- Well, can you handle it?

- B, can you give the man some space?

I need to educate him on the ways of the Carter family.

- And see now that's what I was afraid of.

- So Ellie actually went to Brazil.

- Yeah. - You ever been?

Bruh, have I ever been?

Let me tell you a story.

- No you don't. No you don't.

Don't be telling him none of your skanky ass nasty

sex stories.

Don't be telling him that.

- So okay.

So this one time you understand, so.

- Yes.

- Let me have a large coffee.

- Flavor?

- No, no flavor. Just regular coffee.

- Sir We don't make regular coffee here.

Our coffee comes from a special blend of made

out of special beans that make it the best coffee

on this earth.

- Well, okay. Give me one of those then.

- One of what?

- The special thing for the.

Try the Japanese , you're driving, right?

- Whoa!

First of all, personal space.

Second of all, that sounds like liquid cocaine.

- Tastes like it too.

- How do you know what cocaine tastes like?

- Just try it, its really good.

- Told you.

- Look, man and woman.

I appreciate your concern, but I got this.

- Okay and just doubt.

- You cannot help some people.

- Its actually a really good choice.

- See?

- Told you. - Mm-hmm.

- Everybody, I can choose my own coffee.

- Pick it already, you're giving us caffeine anxiety.

- Pretty sure that's not a thing.

Okay. Let me get pinochet.

- Now you really messed up.

What's wrong with the pinochet?

- The coffee is actually named

after former President Jose Ramon Pinochet,

the one who invented the beans.

They come from Chile.

- Okay. So, all right.

Give me that jack off-

- Jack and the beanstalk.

- That, yeah. The jack and the beanstalk thing.

Made from the beans,

that are made from angel turds.

That thing, please and thank you.

- You don't have to be sarcastic, you know?

Yeah whatever the cap.

- That'll be 19.75.

- Beg your pardon?

No I asked for one coffee.

- I gave you one coffee.

- One coffee cost almost 20 dollars?

- It's totally worth, bro.

- Dude, can you not? - Trying to help.

- You already said that.

- How would you like to pay? Debit or credit?

- Debit.

- US debit or Visa debit?

- Well, its a Visa card so I guess Visa debit.

I don't know, what's the difference?

- Visa debit is credit.

- Then why do they call it visa debit?

- I don't know. Why didn't you ask them?

- Maybe I will.

- What's wrong with paying with credit?

- Credit cost more.

- Not if you have good credit.

- Even if you...

- Hey, can I get a jack and the beanstalk?

- US debit or Visa card?

- Don't you have something for me?

Where did you get that from?

Wow, that's the real thing, huh?

What's it called, man?

- Don't worry about all that.

- At least you can tell the name of it.

- Who dat?

- Who dat where?

- Where what?

- What do you mean where what?

- Are you fucked up already?

- Yo, you crazy, bro.

- No, man, it's the strain.

It's called who dat, its from New Orleans.

- That's smooth right there.

- Its like a hug from God, right?

- I don't feel high, I feel good but I don't feel high.

Now, that's some good stuff right there

What if, weed was away for the government

to keep us from being focused on success?

What do we get out of it anyway?

- No, man.

Expand your mind, brother.

Check it, if you didn't smoke,

would you even have that thought?

- You right, bro.

That's some good stuff right there.

I feel great.

- Right, right.

- I feel coherent, but happy.

Yo, check it. What's up between you and supermilf?

Talking about miss right?

What else can I say?

She cook, she clean, she's divorced

and she get a fat alimony cheque

every month with nothing better to do with it,

than to mofongo a brother all night long.

I'm committed, bruh, I'm committed.

- I am happy brother, truly.

- You know I gotta ask right?

- You don't to do nothing but stay black and die.

- I gotta ask.

- Did I stutter?

- What happened to- - Don't say it.

- That's it, now you blew my high, bro.

- Look, you can't talk to me who can you talk to, bro?

- She wasn't who thought she was.

- I got that apparently, but what about the baby?

- She told me it wasn't mine.

- Damn, bro. Hey look, its all good.

You got mad friends

and they got alimony cheques ready to line your pockets

up with, bro.

- I'm not Worried about that.

The main thing is that I went back

to med school because I thought she was having my baby.

And of course my father wants me to follow through with it.

But none of them single

I'm just trying to find my motivation.

You know what I'm saying?

- You know what you sound like right now?

Like a spoiled little biatch right now.

- Is that your pep talk?

- Hell yeah this my pep talk.

I mean, look.

Where I'm from, success, college,

wasn't even a thing at all.

It wasn't something that we would talk about.

We didn't have any options.

We had to survive, bro.

Now you got all these options

and now you acting like it's a burden.

- So, what's you saying?

- I'm saying do all that,

be all that you can be.

Be a singer, be a doctor, be a lawyer.

Who cares? Just see where it all leads.

- Yeah, I guess you're right.

- I'm always right

and it aint the weed that's talking either.

What?

- What Mookie?

- No. I just saw.

Never mind, never mind.

- Who the hell is that?

- You saw it too?

- The baby? Hell yeah.

In thirty feet,

arrive at your destination.

Arrived.

- Arrived?

Where is the gas station?

Where is the gas station?

Okay.

You're not gon' keep me from my woman.

That's what you not gon' do.

Of course I'm out of gas.

Of course I'm out of a gas.

Of course I'm out of gas.

Of course I'm out of gas.

Of course I'm out gas.

Okay. All right.

Directions to nearest gas station.

In 20 feet,

arrive at the nearest gas station.

- No not this gas station.

Okay. Directions to next nearest gas station.

The next nearest gas station

is 5.6 miles away.

- 5.6 miles, 5.6 miles.

Okay. 5.6 miles.

5.6 miles.

- So, you mean to tell me Arrow and Angela

went hiking in the jungle?

- I don't know, I think its nice.

- No, he should have told her his plans first.

- Sounds like fun to me.

Now you from Puerto Rico,

y'all got jungle all over the place.

The only place Angela has ever seen anything like that

was it the Universal Soul Circuit.

- Glad you can make it.

You know the reunion wouldn't be the same without you.

- It's great to be here.

The Carter's always taken good care of me.

I'm just sad they couldn't make it.

but sounds like they having a good time.

- Oh yeah.

If I know my cousin Arrow,

he made it seem like he couldn't get back

so they can stay behind and do what they do.

- What they do?

- You think they still be down like that?

- Please.

That man is a urologist.

He got access to unlimited Viagra.

What would you do?

- You already know.

You already know.

- Excuse me ma'am,

what are you doing in my car?

Excuse ma'am you're in my car.

Ma'am.

I need you to tell me,

what you are doing in my car.

- What?

- Yeah, I speak English.

I'm just messing with you.

- Okay, let's try this again.

I'm Jeffrey and you are?

- Soccorro.

- Suck, what?

Soccorro.

Are you not from El Paso?

- No, I'm just passing through.

- Well, I'm part of the welcoming committee.

Welcome.

- Okay, suck.

- Say, so.

- So.

- Co.

- Co.

- Ro.

- Ro.

Okay. Soccorro.

Why are you in my car?

- Its hot.

- Its hot.

- Yup, it's hot outside.

Car is cool.

It was a sign.

What would you do?

- Okay, point taken.

Where did you come from?

Outer space.

- Seriously?

- El Paso.

- Why are you in the outskirts of town,

In the middle of nowhere, sitting in my car

looking like you just got out of the club?

Sorry.

- It's too late for that.

Come on.

- Okay, okay, Detective Brown.

I got in a little argument with my boyfriend.

He kicked me out of the car.

- That's a asshole move.

- You have no idea how right you are, Jeffrey.

- All right, let me just fill up the gas tank

and then I'll take you wherever you wanna go.

- You're a kind man. Do you have a girlfriend?

- Yeah. Actually, I'm trying to get to her now.

It's been a hell of a day.

- She's a lucky girl.

- Hey, is that your boyfriend back there

coming up the road?

Is your boyfriend jealous?

- He's very jealous and aggressive.

- Is that him? Is that him?

- No, it's just my blunt driver.

Thank you so much.

You are the best.

Thank you, next time lock your car.

Jesus, Jesus.

What did you eat woman? Geez.

Okay. Ooh, boy.

I got a long drive a head of me, long drive.

Let's make this happen.

Come on.

Come on, man. Good job, Jeffrey.

You had to have a hot car with no spare.

Okay, okay. It's 4th of July weekend.

I will find a tow company.

4th of July weekend. I can do this.

You ain't gon' keep me from my woman.

That's what you ain't gon' do.

- Cuz, I miss my phone already.

- Tell me about it.

Who made that no phone rule anyway...

- I'm pretty sure it was Grandpa Arrow.

Something about smart phones.

Take the union out of family reunion.

- I'll be so glad when I'm 18

- Well, on the bright side,

I think we got some great fireworks this year.

We're not allowed to open them until nightfall.

- Aren't you getting tired of following the rules?

- How we open the box?

- I'm way ahead of you.

Come on.

Yo. They got some caps.

- What are caps?

- You've never used caps?

My dad used to play with these all the time with me.

Usually, there's a cap gun or something around.

I don't see one.

Okay. I'll just use a lighter.

These should explode.

So like, you might wanna step back.

What? Really? Nothing.

- Wait. You here something?

- Hey Aunt Mae.

- Hey sweetie.

You need to thank your sister.

If it wasn't for her, we wouldn't be here

in the first place.

Thanks, sis, good job.

- Yeah whatever.

- I got to ask this.

Am not crazy.

- Okay.

Have you seen a little baby.

- White skin at least.

- White ass little baby.

- No.

- Maybe I saw nothing.

- Okay, they are crazy.

- Let me, I got a question for all you guys.

As black people, should we celebrate the 4th of July?

Boy, you sound crazy.

- Drunk women, barbecue.

What's that enjoyed about that?

- You got a point Right?

- I'm serious.

- That's the God damn problem boy,

you too damn serious all at the time.

- Just just saying, what about Juneteenth?

- Listen son, this sign this day

became important to this family

because of our great grandfather

and the traditions that he instilled in us.

Listen to 4th of July to celebrates our country's freedom

from England.

But black people, they weren't free

when the country became free.

Now you want to know my perspective on it.

- Yeah man.

- You wanna know mine?

I'm grateful for Independence Day,

because it set a precedence,

some we could stand on so we can have a Juneteenth.

All right?

4th of July celebrates our nations freedom

but we can't truly be free.

- Right.

- Until we all are free.

- That's right.

- Yes, sir.

- Do you hear me family?

- I see you Obama.

- All right.

Can I get an amen?

- Yes sir.

- But are we truly free?

- Boy, you was homeschooled wont you?

- Went to school?

- Did your parents use the burn you

with the cigarette butts?

What is everybody always ask me that?

- Broke down towing, how Mae I help you?

- Yeah, I need tow.

Have a flat.

- You need as to change your tire.

No, my car doesn't have a spare.

- I just need you to take me to the nearest tire place.

- Now that's your first mistake?

- My first, like how soon can you get here?

- Where are you headed?

- To the nearest tire place doesn't matter.

Which one?

- No, I mean, where are you headed

for Fourth July weekend?

- To a family reunion in Virginia.

- Ooh, that sound like fun.

Y'all gonna have barbecue?

- Yes, I'm sure we'll have lots of barbecue.

- Ooh, what about cake?

And...

- Ma'am, ma'am what is your name?

- Santeria Terry Franklin baby was yours?

- It's Jeffrey.

Listen, Santeria.

You are the only tow place open in town.

And if you can help me,

I'm going to spend the 4th of July weekend

on the side of the road in my car.

Can you help me?

- I got you.

You know, I almost forgot about that.

You started talking

about barbecue and fireworks and cake and stuff.

- I didn't even mentioned fireworks.

- Okay?

- I'm checking now, all our drivers are called in sick,

except Leroy.

You got lucky too, 'cause Ronnie, Bobby

and Becky they like to drink on the holidays.

- I gotta ask?

- Yup, is four brothers,

their parents like new edition.

- That's not even there era.

What?

- Leroy works the most, he's on that stuff.

So he always need money.

I'll call Leroy now.

Hold on.

Okay, Leroy said he'll be here in three hours.

He's pulling somebody out of a ditch right now.

- Ouch!

- Yup, somebody's always worse often than you.

- Well thank you Santeria.

- Thank me by taking me to that barbecue.

- Oh, I couldn't swing that one.

- Oh, hold up.

- I thought we was cool.

You was just using me to get a holiday tow.

Like I'm some kinda tow hoe? I aint nobody's tow hoe.

- Santeria look, I'm in a situation,

I'm trying to get back with my baby's mother

and it just would be a really bad look

if I bring you to the family reunion, you understand?

I can't show up with another woman.

- Oh, sound like you get some drama.

I don't like holiday drama.

You got any friends?

Get one of your friends to take me.

You got a single friend, right?

- I have a friend you would probably like

but he's not invited to the barbecue.

- Well, listen.

Jeffrey is like this, my family lives far away

from me and we'd never have reunion.

And I broke up with my man

about a year ago and I told you I love barbecue.

So, you gonna get me an invite to this barbecue

and a date, if I'm gonna to get you back

on the road in three hours, what size tire you need?

- 255/18/25.

- But nothing, we have a deal.

See you in two hours.

- No, she didn't?

Okay,

wow.

- Counselor, how's it going?

- Dante? Yeah, yeah, what's up?

- Well, I'm not in jail for tax evasion thanks to you.

And no thanks to my accountant.

So I'm great, brother.

When are we playing ball again, man?

After the holidays.

Look I got a situation.

- A situation?

Come on bruh, what kind of situation could you have?

What's happening?

- You know I'm dating your ex...

- Please tell me that's not the situation?

That's old news, man.

- Well, I want to take a blind date to her family re-union.

- Wait, what?

- What are we feeding these kids?

They have grown up so fast.

- Magic beans, girl, magic beans

and rice and potato salad and barbecue chicken.

- And bread, don't forget the bread.

- Like Robert said, Erica does not eat pork anymore.

- What?

You didn't tell me you don't eat no ham hock,

no bacon, no sausage.

No.

- No, girl.

- No chicken fries, pork and beans.

- What in the...

bacon fried what?

- Yeah, I can't believe y'all never tried it.

- Yeah no, I don't eat pork anymore.

- Why?

They sound like the.

- See now I know you lying,

'cause when you say that,

you have that Carter family twitch...

and your eye, yeah your lying.

- And plus your feet shifted

like it used to do in high school.

- Go on and tell them, baby girl

you want the lifestyle, you gotta own it.

- It's just not healthy enough for me.

Sorry.

- There it is.

- What's that supposed to mean?

- It's supposed to mean...

Y'all that's what.

- It's just not healthy.

Then why do you care about what I eat anyways?

- Oh, this aint about you.

See this is about the way you were raised,

because your daddy, is my brother

and my brother grew up just like me

and the rest of his brothers,

in the projects, sleeping in bunk beds

and doing whatever we had to do to make ends meet.

- I know this Bee, trust me

I spent more time with your brother than you have,.

I know how you all were raised,

so what's the point?

- My point is, why did y'all raise them kids

to turn their backs on family traditions?

- Hey, I'm just the aunt.

Aunts and uncles are supposed to spoil the kids

and their parents well,

they just wanted them to have the best of everything.

So what were we supposed to do?

Raise them in the projects Bee?

- Well how come y'all don't visit us?

- Oh, we're just busy.

Busy?

A stay-at-home parent with one child,

that's why you got so much money

and so much time.

- Okay, you made your point.

We will come and visit, okay.

- Okay.

- Damn.

- Come on baby, give me some love.

Aw, thank you.

Want your bougie hair.

- Erica, you should take a break from your pork diet.

cook, it's going to change your life.

- Girl, you make nothing sound like sex.

Girl, don't tempt me now.

- Well, you know what,

the last time I saw you,

you were still a virgin.

Quit playing, quit playing,

you still a virgin?

- Leave him alone cuz, come on,

the man has been through some things,

just change the subject.

- No, I'm not a virgin.

Can we just focus on getting the meat ready.

- Sounds like you might not have any expertise in meat.

- Look Dave, if he asks me about my sex life,

I'm straight up with you, all right.

I get it two times a year.

Once on Valentine's day

and once when the kids go away.

- Yo, Camp is the best man.

Let me tell y'all, I love me some camp sex,

but how many weeks go?

Two weeks or one week?

- Two weeks of bed-breaking, house-shaking,

naked, ridiculously.

- Damn right

that's what I'm taking about.

Now you talking.

- Oh, man Omar check it out.

- Your turn.

- My turn...

- Did you seriously think we was gonna forget?

- You know I'm kind of curious too.

So what's going on Omar?

- Okay, okay, damn I'll tell you.

- Well, tell it.

- The first time was in college.

- Okay.

- I had this beautiful girl, she's in my room.

- Sounds good.

- But it was winter

and I get really excited, so I forgot I left my window open.

So I take my pants down

and some air flew in my butt,

when things shriveled up

and she told me she came for some real beef,

not kibbles and bits.

That's the only reason I haven't-

I just have sex in the summer, just in case.

- This is your season, Omar.

- Listen, not everybody at this family reunion

is family, all right.

Now, if you make a love connection, it's on you

but just be careful, all right.

- Real careful.

- And stay warm.

- And turn off the AC.

- And no cold drinks.

- You Jeffrey?

Yeah.

- Okay, good.

'Cause you all set.

- Whoa, how'd you do that with me in the car?

- Well, I used to take them,

but now I'm just replacing them.

- Well, good for you.

- No, good for you,

'cause back in the day,

you would have woke up just on bricks.

- Well, thank you Leroy.

- What?

- I said thank you...

- I heard what you said.

How do you know my name?

- Santeria told me.

What?

How do you know Santeria my ex?

- She's the dispatcher at the...

- I don't hear you...

She's the dispatcher at the tow truck

told me.

- Right, Sorry about that,

what the hell isn't she's answering my phone for.

That girl's crazy.

she got me kind of...

- Yeah, yeah she does.

Okay.

Leroy, how much do I owe you?

- How much you got?

- No, I'm asking how much do I owe you

for the tire and the service?

- And I'm asking you, how much you got in that wallet?

- What difference does it make?

Just give me the price.

- 1500.

- $ 1,500?

- 1500.

- For a tire?

- Holiday prices.

- It's the 4th of July, not April fool's day.

- It's a good tire.

- It ain't that damn good.

- Want me to take it back?

- I got 500 cash.

- Cool.

- How you been?

- Good to see you.

- Look at him, Mr can't get it right,

just in time baby for a CP time.

- Whatever y'all, I ran into some traffic so,

- You still rapping there?

- Nah, I'm producer now.

- I know you.

I remember your song,

eat the booty.

- Yeah, that was my jam.

That hook was on fire boy.

- Quit playing.

- Wait, wait, wait.

So this is an actual song we're talking about?

That's how you pick down dog?

- Well, It was meant to be provocative,

not literal.

Just something to get the crowd hyped.

It sure would get me hyped.

- You got a live one there man.

- Yeah man.

How long y'all been together?

- We were not

We just met...

- But she got that nose open.

- You right about that brother.

- Yeah well, just keep on waiting for Mr eat the booty here.

- Oh, y'all got jokes.

- Yo, that baby wasn't real Right?

- No, It's the strain man.

Who that get it.

It must be named after like hallucinations.

Like you see people that's not their.

- Dog, come on man.

Saw the same damn thing man, come on.

We both saw one under that table.

- Either he's the most somebody's skirt or he stole the car

and drove away the way that boy is gone.

- No he ain't, he ain't there.

I looked up everybody's skirt,

he wasn't there for sure.

- You did what it wasn't emergency, bro.

You looked at your mother's skirt?

- What? Came from there.

- Ugh!

- Ugh? You came from one too.

Yo, come here little...

Mookie...

What?

- That's somebody's baby.

- No, that's a possessed baby.

Grown ass men and the baby's body,

with a stink ass attitude.

- I guess you're right.

- I'm always right.

Let's go get this bad ass baby.

- Woo, Mae?

Your boy grew up fine, well done, sis.

- Hm, well thanks, but I can't take all the credit.

- Yes, I guess you can.

You know it takes a village.

When our parents first had us,

they didn't have the time or the commitment

and we spent a lot of time with aunt Mae and uncle Victor.

- Yes, you did.

- You guys had a lot of experiences

that our parents just didn't.

So, we've been fortunate enough

to learn from our four parents instead of two.

- Thank you.

- Yes, it takes a village.

- Well, you know Erica, she was the good one.

- Robert, hm, he was the rebel

always trying to do the opposite

of everything that his parents wanted him to do.

But to know he is in med school now.

So, I guess we can't complain.

- Oh! A doctor and lawyer?

I mean, I guess not.

- Hm.

- What is Mookie doing?

- Girl, Mookie is Mookie.

Okay?

Mookie is dependable but he is funny as hell

but I cannot get him to concentrate on nothing

but fast ass women with fat ass.

- Ms. Jackson?

- Girl!

- I mean what?

- That was an insult or a compliment.

I'm a little bit confused here.

- Well, when he first you brought home,

I was a little bit concerned, but you cool, you all right.

So, since you brought it up, what do you see in him?

He don't have any money.

He don't speak any espanol and he don't dance the salsa.

- I love him.

He makes me laugh.

He treat me like a Latin queen.

He wants to become better than what he is now.

- Wow!

- All I know, that's my man, I'm keeping my man

and you all better get used to it.

- Well damn!

- Guess she told us.

- Gracias.

- Hmm.

- Erica, when are you getting married?

- That was out of the blue?

- Good question though.

- Really Angela?

- Girl you know I being nosy.

- I'm nosy too, where's your prince charming?

phone ringing.

Yeah, hello this is Erica.

Yeah, yeah, I'm in the middle of a family reunion right now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- The phone did not ring.

- Oh God! Wait.

- Hello, this is Erica...

Who answers the phone like that anyway?

- I'll tell you one thing though,

if she's keeping a secret like that,

she really likes this one?

- Yup.

- Y'all leave my girl alone.

Leave my baby girl alone

- Girl you're right.

- Got that right.

whole ugly ass baby's gone man.

- Damn demon baby.

Damn chucky frickin' kid.

Freaky.

- Old ugly ass baby.

Did you see him?

- Y'all sound like some punk ass player haters.

Don't shit on me 'cause y'all bitches can't keep up.

What want with me anyway?

- Wait, wait, whoa, whoa, you can talk?

- Now you just insulting my intelligence.

What the hell do y'all chimps want with me?

Spit it out and quit staring at me like I'm a damn alien

before I start bursting heads in here.

- Wow, wow we just seem...

Were you even invited to this family reunion.

- Were you invited?

- Well, yeah...

Not exactly, but I'm part of the family.

- How you know I'm not?

- Whoa, whoa, no offense, your little white ass,

ugly ass don't look like you belong in our family reunion.

- You sound racist as hell right now.

How you know I aint white skinned or albino?

- What are you?

- I'm a baby fool!

What are you that's the real question Robin?

What are you?

- What kind of question is that?

- Well it must be a good one,

'cause you just asked me the same thing.

Answer it what are you?

I'll make it easier.

Are you a man or a baby?

- A man obviously.

- Is it obvious?

You broke up with, what's her name? Six months ago

and you aint been on a date yet.

Seem to me like you lost your balls homie

and if you loose those, you will never have kids

and you are the last in a long line of Carter men,

so your family needs you to get your ass out there and date

and find a real woman and have some baby brother.

- Hi, oh my God.

I thought you couldn't make it

- Babe, I've been through hell.

I've been driving all night.

I drank some cocaine, coffee...

I think I had cocaine in it.

Anyway, I know you got a deep bench,

I just need you to know, I love you.

- Why didn't say that before

No, I don't have a deep bench.

I only have you. I love you too.

* Do you wanna be my?

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my? *

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my? *

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my? *

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my? *

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my? *

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my baby *

* At the end of the night

* Be my

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my *

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my *

* Do you, do you, do you wanna be my baby *

* At the end of the night

* Would you like to take my hand *

* I can be your midnight man

* I can give you everything that you were hoping *

* That I can

* And you've been driving me insane *

* Damn, I really love your brain, I love your hair *

* I love your style, I love your ass *

* I love your smile

* It'd be you reckless claim

* To say I think you feel the same *

* So could we do this

* We won't use this lose excuses to blame *

* So lets go out and dance once more *

* Let our bodies go explore

* Rhythms and melodies and please the dance floor *

* Boy

* And if there's one thing left to say *

* Do you wanna come my way

* Girl I'll treat you right

* So, do you wanna be my baby at the end of the night? *

* My night fire

* Be my

* Do you wanna?

* Be my baby at the end of the night *

* Be my, do you wanna, do you wanna be *

* Do you wanna

* Do you wanna be my baby at the end of the night *

* Be my

* Do you wanna be my baby at the end of the night *

* Do you wanna be my baby at the end of the night *

* Be my

* Do you wanna

* Do you wanna be my baby at the end of the night *

* Be my, do you wanna be my baby at the end of the night *

* Be my