Original subtitles

(car engine revs loudly)

- I can't ever remember anyone being

asked for a sports car to follow

a hearse on a funeral before.

- [Narrator] In the UK today,

we're spending more money than ever on our funerals.

For some, it will be the most extravagant

event of their lives.

- You can have the horses, the caskets;

they can be as flash as you like.

20, 30 limousines if you want.

You can hire buses, have a helicopter if you wanted.

- The manufacturer provides a list of famous people

who have been in their caskets.

- It is a lot of money but money's not an object

when it comes to burying someone that you love, really.

- [Narrator] We follow Britain's top undertakers.

- If I could manage to get one donkey, one pony,

a couple of goats and half a dozen hens,

is that the sort of volume that you're thinking of?

- [Narrator] As they strive to meet

their customers' increasing demands.

- Make sure we nail this.

- And then go around.

- [Man] It's too steep, Marcus

- And then look, boom.

- This is ridiculous.

- [Man] Watch your step, all right?

- There's always that pressure to make it perfect,

to make it right.

- [Narrator] The average funeral costs

three and a half thousand pounds.

But many of us spend a lot more.

(playful violin music)

In Buckinghamshire, successful farming family,

the Smiths, are planning their brother Nathan's funeral

and with an unlimited budget,

they're pulling out all the stops.

- We always spoiled Nath.

Christmas, birthday, all the time.

There's no price on anything for him,

he basically got everything he wanted.

Could call him a spoiled brat, really.

He'd go no I'm not.

- We got to give him the best send off we can.

- [Interviewer] How much do you reckon

in total this has come to?

- So, we've spent over four thousand pound on flowers;

that's cost from a wholesaler

and we've branched out to two other florists

and they're both coming in at like

three thousand pound each, their bill.

- [Narrator] The family has put their lives on hold

to organize most of this funeral themselves,

arranging catering for the expected one thousand guests

and spending 10,000 pounds on cars,

including 10 matching Rolls-Royce Phantoms.

It's taken weeks to make and design

over a hundred floral arrangements

of everything that was ever important to Nathan,

even his electric toothbrush.

- It was a case of what flowers we wanted, we just had.

It's everything what Nathan liked, they done.

We've got a Cadbury's Flake pot yogurt,

finish off the mobile phone,

the pygmy goat on his farm,

a little baby angel from my little nephew.

He liked James Bond, so my little boy Tommy wanted 007,

so he wants it all sprayed red.

- We always used to watch EastEnders,

we'd be sat in his room and then he'd be like

quick, quick, quick, we're gonna miss EastEnders!

Quick, put it on the TV, quick!

- [Interviewer] Why have you spent so much money

on this funeral?

- We don't want him to go out like he'd be forgotten,

we want it to be the one that everyone will remember him,

but everyone will remember him because it's Nath,

Nath's just loved by everyone.

- We all really,

Mum brought us up to be very close.

All of us, 'cause there's one of nine

and it was a case of you look after.

You don't come as an individual,

you come as one of a whole.

So we've all been brought up really close as a family

and Nath being in the wheelchair,

that pulls you even closer.

This is Nath.

This is our family portrait.

So this is all of the children.

That's all of us.

This is Nath's room.

'cause he was in a wheelchair,

he had to have the shower in the room.

- [Narrator] Nathan was only 23 when he died.

He went into hospital with breathing problems

and sadly never recovered

due to his existing medical condition.

- He had muscular dystrophy

and that's like a muscle wasting disease.

He started when he was like six or seven.

Dad noticed it first, 'cause he started to walk funny

and he said to my mum,

buy him a decent pair of shoes,

that's what Dad thought it was.

So when she took him to the doctor's,

they said it was a one in a million chance;

it's not in the family,

so we always tried to make his life

as normal as it could be.

- [Interviewer] I suppose he was like the center

of your family from what I've heard?

- He was our life.

We put Nath before we put our own children.

He come first and then our kids follow on.

It was always like you base your life

around what Nath wanted.

- [Narrator] The family is determined to give Nathan

the best funeral possible.

For them, money is no object.

- There's never been a budget when it came to Nath,

even when he was alive we didn't have a budget.

What he wanted, he got.

(playful brass music)

- [Narrator] There are 600,000 funerals

in the UK every year.

At A.W Lymn's in Nottingham,

they lay 100 people to rest every week.

- 220 in the west.

Bentley hearse and one van Guernsey from Rowington address.

One of the company directors is Matthew.

- When people meet you and ask what your job is,

if you tell them you're a funeral director

there's two reactions.

They either run an absolute mile,

don't want anything to do with you

or they'll be inquisitive and want to know why,

and the most straightforward answer for me

is that it's a family business.

My dad and my grandfather before him

and my grandmother and great-grandfather,

great-great-grandfather had all done the same thing.

- [Narrator] Planning a funeral can be pricey.

- 400 pounds just for using the church

and then you've got the pastor on top of that.

- [Narrator] The cheapest and by far

the most popular way to go is cremation.

- So this room here, this is the columbarium

where we keep all of the cremated remains

that have been collected from the crematorium.

We usually hold them just for a little bit of time

but we do have a number of cremated remains

which have been here for a very, very long time,

where families haven't collected them for whatever reason.

The oldest set that we have dates right back

until 1901, so really old.

- [Narrator] At 660 pounds,

cremations are a third of the price of a burial,

but either way, you'll need a coffin.

- This is our coffin and casket showroom.

The coffins and casket that you see here

are based at Catholics, you could say.

They're traditional coffins with Christian imagery on them.

In this case, an image of The Last Supper

depicted inside the coffin lid.

- [Narrator] Most of us try to keep funeral costs down

but Matthew also deals with families

who are willing to spend whatever it takes

to have the perfect send off.

- The caskets at the back of the room

are the status symbol, really.

So much so, that the manufacturer provides

a list of famous people

who have been in their caskets.

Michael Jackson, James Brown, and one of the Kennedys.

This casket is the Batesville Promethean

and to my knowledge is the most expensive casket

that will be in stock in the UK.

The casket is made of solid 48-ounce bronze, polished,

and each piece is 24-carat gold plated.

The Promethean casket also comes with its own handbook,

the 15-year limited warranty and guarantee certificate.

- [Interviewer] So there's a warranty?

How would you need a warranty?

- I don't know that anyone's ever claimed on the warranty

but it's that peace of mind for a client,

to know that when this casket is interred in the ground,

it is absolutely safe and nothing will go wrong with it.

- [Interviewer] Who'd buy one of these?

- The three that we've sold have all been

to members of the Traveler community.

- [Narrator] Today Matthew is on his way

to meet one Traveler family who've got big plans.

- Just quickly chammy that one,

and you quickly chammy this one.

- [Narrator] Irish Travelers, the McCanns,

have recently suffered the loss of their brother, Fano.

Determined to give him one last big day,

they've contacted Matthew and are keen

to show him that only the best will do.

- [Interviewer] What are you cleaning for?

- For Matthew to come over and discuss about the funeral.

Well he sounds like he knows what he's doing,

we're putting all our trust in Matthew.

- [Interviewer] And if Matthew pulls this off,

what will happen?

- I guess he will be working for a lot of Travelers,

a lot of Travelers.

(playful orchestral music)

- [Narrator] Funeral director Matthew

is on his way to arrange what could be

one of his biggest ever funerals

for Traveler family, the McCanns.

- [Matthew] Hi there.

- Come in.

- Thank you very much.

The Travelers' funerals are almost always a big affair.

Numbers of people, numbers of vehicles,

Travelers like a good show and they like to have

more and bigger of anything that we can provide.

- This kind of bus?

- [Woman] Yeah, yeah.

- [Matthew] It's an old London bus.

I don't think I've ever--

- [Matthew] And he robbed a bus?

- He robbed a bus.

He got two year in jail for it, right?

I told you he's mad.

- [Mick] Told you he's mad, didn't I?

- [Narrator] As well as the bus incident,

Fanos spent much of his life in and out of prison

before passing away at the age of 55.

- [Matthew] But he was always in for a bit, out for a bit.

But never a long, long, spell.

- He was never out for one Christmas in his whole lifetime.

- [Matthew] Honestly?

- Honestly.

- If Fanos never spent a Christmas out,

never spent a birthday out.

He was never married.

- No.

- So, he's never had his big party.

- No.

- And please, I understand it's not a party,

but through life you have these celebrations

whether it's a christening,

or whether it's a wedding,

or whether it's a Christmas party.

But actually Fano's never had the chance

to have his big celebration.

- Everyone is chipping in.

Everyone wants him to have the best.

- I hope I do.

I think we've got all the right information.

The brothers were saying that Fano

never had a lot in life when it came to material things,

but by organizing the funeral the way they have,

they're giving Fano absolutely everything.

And if there is an actual way to give more bells

and more whistles on top of what's already been arranged,

the family are interested to know how they can do that.

When the family were asked first of all

why they want to celebrate Fano's life in this way,

the initial response from his sister was

just simply that we loved him so much.

- [Narrator] And to celebrate their love,

the family is sparing no expense.

As well as the double-decker bus,

they've requested five of Matthew's luxury cars,

a Lamborghini, a red carpet, and even farmyard animals.

- Sometimes it is surprising just how much

people are willing to spend on a funeral.

For something that you could argue is not necessary.

We could all be laid to rest in a cardboard coffin

with a very simple service.

(playful orchestral music)

- [Narrator] In London, one of the biggest and busiest

funeral parlors is T. Cribbs.

They've been sending people out in style for 135 years.

- Are you the next of kin?

- [Narrator] One of their clients, 26-year-old Easton,

is spending 30,000 pounds to commemorate the life

of his mum, Sharon.

- It's very expensive for funerals now.

I think they could more expensive,

or just as much as a wedding, really.

I think because they're a one-time event,

so you know once you've done it, for my mum,

she's never gonna get that same event again.

- [Narrator] Easton's mum died six weeks ago,

and he's preparing to see her for the last time.

- It's the first time I've seen her since she's passed,

so I'm sort of excited but then I'm like

oh I wonder how she is.

It's literally the last, my last image

so I hope it's a beautiful image.

Of which I've been told she looks beautiful,

so it'd be good to see her.

That coffin is beautiful.

All the makeup on.

Wow.

I think she'd be upset with the makeup.

My mum didn't really wear makeup.

These people put on so much makeup,

but I guess it had to be done anyway.

Happy now I've seen her, but

just don't look like my mum, that's all.

Big part's gone.

I remember my mum, her like that sort of.

Seeing her now, it's just...

Yeah, wow.

Well, it's really, it's less than 1,000 pounds

for each year she was alive, really.

So, you think about what that person contributes.

We can be too stingy in a way, we can be,

towards our loved ones.

But sometimes you just say what the hell with it,

like what we done.

We're just gonna give her what she deserves, really.

(bass-driven music)

- [Narrator] The man in charge of helping to give

Easton's mum everything she deserves is undertaker, Marcus.

- My taste in certain things does surprise people.

My kids especially.

They say the music coming out of my car

doesn't reflect the person sitting in it.

- [Narrator] Today, he's on his way to reserve a spot

for Easton's mum in one of the country's

most sought after cemeteries.

- We're in the City of London cemetery.

Unfortunately, with built-up areas like London,

land is at a premium.

The existing cemeteries are filling up quite quickly.

The higher demand for anything does mean that costs go up.

- [Narrator] Research suggests that half of England's

cemeteries will run out of space within the next 20 years.

So, securing your spot can be an expensive business.

- The vaults, they cost the most.

They're about 32,000 pounds in total,

but that doesn't include the stone, of course.

'Cause then you could spend another 15, 20 on the stone.

- [Narrator] But your final resting place

may not be as secure as you think,

as most graves are sold with just a 100-year lease,

there may be need in the future to reuse graves.

- You can dig people out of a grave

that the lease has expired,

place them to one side,

and then, you dig 20 foot down,

and place those one, two, three, four, five people

20 foot down, and then resell the burial plot above.

There is ideas of doing that.

- [Narrator] Easton has decided on one of the most

exclusive parts of the cemetery for his mum,

the catacombs.

An indoor cemetery with rows and rows of burial chambers.

- It's something she deserves in a way

the best we could provide for her.

'Cause it would've been easy to say,

do you know what, she's passed.

Even though she didn't want to buried,

we're just gonna bury her,

or she didn't wanna be cremated,

but we're just gonna cremate her, 'cause it's a bit cheaper.

It was more about, you know what,

I believe that if my mum was there she'd be like,

"Yep, that's what I want."

So, that's why we went for it.

- The catacombs, they are seven and a half thousand pounds

for a 100-year lease.

That is just to purchase the cell, if you like.

Some are wider than the others,

but you've gotta be careful that, obviously,

the coffin fits.

'Cause you wouldn't want to get here

and find out it doesn't go in.

- [Narrator] If you prefer somewhere more exclusive

than the graveyard, and you have enough land,

you can be buried in your back garden.

And with 95 acres of it, the Smith family

has decided to create a bespoke tomb on their farm

for their brother Nathan.

The tomb is made of tiled walls featuring family photos,

and has taken 120 hours to make.

- Just say the normal grave,

which is a hole in the ground,

to say that was Derek Trotter's Reliant,

than this is your Rolls-Royce.

- It's looking good.

Yeah, it looks very nice, really nice.

It makes all those hours on the laptop

digging up photos worthwhile.

I guess there are lots of people out there

that wouldn't do something like this

because they would just think it would be

a waste of money,

whereas for us, you don't worry about the money

you just do what you want to do.

- [Narrator] The whole family has spent the last fortnight

preparing to make sure Nathan's funeral

is everything he would've wanted.

- It's when things happen like that

that you all come together.

When it comes to funerals, I know they're expensive anyway,

but didn't matter what it cost,

it was what mum wanted, that mum picked,

that Nath would've wanted.

- [Narrator] One of the most unique details

is a bespoke painted casket.

The first of its kind.

And they even bought a spare one in case they don't like it.

- Mum's gotta check it over,

make sure she's happy with it,

and if she's not we have got a blue one on standby.

Even though we've seen the artwork and everything else,

I think it's just a case of making sure

that it's all perfect.

Nice face, it's lovely.

- [Interviewer] Is it expensive to get a coffin like that?

- I don't know.

It's not a coffin, it's a casket.

So, I think they're a more expensive coffin.

Coffin's just like a normal.

This has got silver handles and that on it.

Mum, what do you think of it?

The coffin.

- Yeah, I like it, yeah.

- Sweet, not gonna have second one now.

'cause we stick to the first one.

To our original plan.

So, she doesn't need a second one.

- [Interviewer] So, how do you feel?

- I like it.

I love it.

It's really, really, nice.

We're all pleased with it.

- [Narrator] With the casket chosen, and the tomb finished,

everything is finally ready for Nathan's funeral.

- Every family wants their funeral to be perfect.

That's just natural, but some families more than others.

You can tell that they are pouring over every detail

with every part of their heart and soul,

and you really feel for them.

(playful orchestral music)

- [Narrator] In Nottingham, Matthew is on a mission

to source one very unusual detail for the McCann's funeral

for their brother Fano.

They have asked for farmyard animals

to grace the funeral procession,

and Matthew is on the hunt for a Shetland pony.

- Good afternoon.

I'm a funeral director,

and I've been contacted by a family

who are asking whether it's possible

to have any farm animals at a burial.

- Oh.

- It's not something I've ever been asked for before.

- [Narrator] Following the advice of his new-found contact,

Matthew heads off to seek out other suppliers.

- Hello.

Oh, yes.

Couldn't really commit to what we need.

Unfortunately, not willing to help us.

Unfortunately, she doesn't think it's something

she can help with.

It's, I guess, out of her comfort zone, perhaps.

- [Narrator] Until success.

- [Matthew] Look at that mane.

- Isn't it?

It's so thick.

- [Matthew] A bit like Tina Turner.

- So, this one takes forever,

and this one is a bit of a speed demon.

- Well, that's good because a funeral pace is nice and slow.

- Yeah.

- [Narrator] The pony's ticked off the slow,

but Matthew's can-do attitude has

set him up for a challenge.

- If a family asks for something that's unusual,

we don't just say no.

I think that the best way to describe that

is that yes is the answer,

now tell me what the question is.

I've got an awful lot to do this week.

And I've got an awful lot more to do now.

There's a lot of arranging, a lot of organizing.

I need to make sure that everything

is checked and double-checked,

because on a big funeral like this,

in the same way that we would feel on any funeral,

nothing can go wrong.

(rooster crowing)

- [Narrator] It's the morning of Nathan's funeral,

and his family is ready to see the culmination

of all their hard work.

- [Interviewer] Is this all about trying to

just keep him close, keep him with you?

- Yeah, yeah.

Just keeping his memory alive, really.

- [Narrator] Including the Rolls-Royces,

the procession stretches for over a mile,

bringing the whole town to a stand still.

- [Liza] It's just a sign of respect, I think.

The family we're in, they all have big funerals.

I don't even think it's about being flash,

it's just what you wanted to give him.

- [Narrator] There are over a thousand mourners.

Too many to fit inside the church.

- [Liza] That proved to me,

the amount of people that were there,

of how much he was well liked,

and how much he was loved.

(melancholy piano music)

- [Pastor] On this sad occasion,

we give thanks to God for Nathan's life,

for all that he's meant to his family and friends.

- [Man] The farm will never be the same without you Nathan.

23 is too young to be leaving us.

We love you so much.

- [Pastor] A million times we will miss you,

a million times we will cry.

If love alone could've saved you,

you never would've died.

- [Narrator] As the ceremony comes to an end,

everyone heads back to the farm,

where even more guests arrive,

to show their respects.

(melancholy piano music)

- [Liza] You can't put it into words what...

It just feels like you've had your stomach ripped out.

'Cause you're in such a state,

even now I look back and think,

god I couldn't even tell you who was there.

- [Narrator] As the day draws to a close,

the funeral is just the start of the family's efforts

to remember Nathan.

In London, Easton is busy organizing his mum's funeral.

- Looking for a navy blue suit,

with it's got to be a baby blue tie.

- Yeah.

- And a white shirt for all of us.

- [Narrator] He set himself a budget for the day

of 30,000 pounds.

- It's a lot of money if you think about

what you earn for a year.

It is a lot of money, but like I keep saying

money is not an object when it comes

to burying someone that you love, really, so.

- [Interviewer] So, do you earn 30,000 a year?

- Pre-tax, yeah.

After tax, no.

Yes, yes.

- [Narrator] Easton has taken the lead

in arranging his mum's funeral.

Being from a Caribbean background,

it needs to be a large affair.

It's taken six weeks to arrange flowers,

a DJ, catering for the hundreds of guests,

and a hall for the wake,

resplendent with crystal chandeliers.

For Easton, the event is especially important

because his mum had a difficult life.

- This is where she always was.

Yeah, she just was like, this is her everything, really.

And it's still, it's got her smell.

Since I've locked it away,

and no one's really been in here.

So yeah.

- [Narrator] Easton's mum, Sharon, died at the age of 46.

When Easton was only five,

a mystery illness left Sharon paralyzed from the neck down.

She spent the next 20 years almost confined

to one room in their East London flat.

- She couldn't do anything except for move her head, really.

And that's a big shock, that one time you're able to walk

and it was not like you was ill.

So, it's like you was able to walk,

had a headache, gone to the hospital,

and the next thing you wake up and you can't move anything.

She was young, only 27.

She had a lot to deal with and a lot to get over.

She used to have pictures all up there.

Some of her medication.

That cross is still there.

That was basically on top of her head.

She used to put sweets and that

sometimes she tried to hide them from me in here.

So, she used to put them in a jar,

so if I open the door, she would hear me, innit,

and say, "Oi!"

- [Narrator] Sharon's last wish was to mark

the end of her life with a spectacular funeral.

- I think she deserves to be selfish at least once,

I think everyone does,

and think even if she didn't even want something big,

I'll still mostly would've done it big

because that's what I wanna do for my mum.

I believe it will be the biggest day of my mum's life,

we've planned it to be.

So, yeah let's hope that she's happy with it.

(playful orchestral music)

- [Narrator] At Nottingham's top funeral parlor,

A.W. Lymn's, there's excitement in the air.

They've got a new brochure.

- All our products and services and their prices.

We're all excited because this is a new edition.

We have the brochure once a year with all the prices in.

Pictures of everything that we do.

The coffins, caskets, flowers.

And we're just gonna see who features this year.

Stacey's in it.

Page three.

- [Woman] Page three?

- [Man] Page three.

- [Narrator] High up on their list of selling points

is their fleet of luxury cars.

- This showroom houses our eight cars

with a replacement value,

if we were gonna buy new cars tomorrow,

of in excess of two million pounds.

- [Narrator] The flagship of the fleet is a bespoke

Rolls-Royce costing half a million pounds.

- In terms of funeral vehicles,

in my mind, this is absolutely the ultimate.

- [Narrator] The specially-designed hearse

features LED lights,

an automated rear door and coffin platform,

and even an internal sound system

that will play your favorite tracks.

- This car makes you feel a million dollars.

The fact that it's a hearse

puts a slightly different spin on that,

but the car itself is incredible.

- [Narrator] Today, the person having their final journey

in Matthew's exclusive hearse is Traveler Fano.

The family has a long list of requests

so Matthew is having to pull out all the stops.

- We've got, someone needs to get on the bus

- Just on the front?

- We've got balloons still wanna do.

We've got red carpet to do.

The distance factor, the amount individual

sort of items that this family has asked for,

an awful lot of work's gone into it.

The idea is that the last bit of the journey

the casket does,

we're gonna put out the red carpet for them.

- [Interviewer] Why red carpet?

- To be able to have his very last journey

as we get to the grave over the red carpet

is nice for the family.

Thank you.

- [Narrator] In an effort to make this funeral stand out,

the family has asked for a double-decker bus,

a sports car, and a Shetland pony.

- The Lamborghini that was around the corner is not here,

the horses that were on their way are not yet here.

We've found with some of the more demanding clients,

when they come in to organize a funeral,

they've seen another funeral,

and they want to make sure that what they're providing,

in terms of the material items,

is just as good, if not very smartly better.

- [Narrator] The Lamborghini has arrived.

(car engine revs loudly)

But with no sign of the pony,

Matthew has to head to the hotel

to pick up the guests.

- Okay?

Yeah, any car now is fine.

Any car now is fine.

- No, no, Amanda!

The sisters have to go in the car.

Have some more respect when we get to the chapel.

- [Matthew] Okay.

- [Woman] Where's the pony, Matthew?

- [Narrator] The majority of the 400-strong crowd

are meeting at the church.

For the family, this is all about sending

their brother, Fano, off as he lived.

(car engine revs loudly)

- [Narrator] With the brief church service over,

the congregation head to the cemetery for the final goodbye.

- Okay, mate?!

(car engine revs loudly)

- To me, the importance of the funeral

isn't for the deceased,

the important part of a funeral, to me,

is the process, really,

for those people who are left behind.

Because they need to grieve

and they need to find a way to move on.

(screaming)

(car horns honking)

The standout things on any Traveler funeral

would be the volume of people firstly,

the volume of number of cars.

The Travelers show their emotion in a really public way.

We've all been off to funerals where the atmosphere

may be quiet and somber.

With the Travelers they're happy to be fairly loud.

(car horn honking)

- Whay, farewell Fano!

- [Matthew] And they're quite happy with that.

They don't feel in any way that that's disrespectful.

It's the way that their community works.

- He had a beautiful send-off today.

And all his family, they never led him out the sad way,

they led him out happy way,

what he would've wanted.

- He wouldn't want a sad funeral.

Not Fano.

He wanted everybody to be happy,

and carry on and the way everything went for him.

You know, he'd be looking down now from heaven

saying look what yous all done, you know.

- [Narrator] With the burial underway,

Matthew's job for the day is complete.

- I'm feeling good.

It's gone well.

The weather's held.

Everything's come together.

Everyone seems to be really pleased with what we've done,

so yeah I think it's gone well.

It's gone well.

It's a feeling of elation when you complete any funeral.

It gives you job satisfaction that no other job can offer.

If you can do that for a particularly demanding,

or difficult client, then the feeling is even more so.

And Travelers are some of the most demanding clients

that I've ever worked for.

- [Narrator] At T. Cribb's in East London,

undertaker Marcus still has a lot to do

preparing for Easton's mum's funeral.

- With a funeral like this,

when everything is taken into account,

it's probably one of the most expensive that's been here.

- [Narrator] But the fact that Sharon

is being laid to rest in a catacomb

presents some unique problems.

- A grave you just lower straight into,

whereas with a catacomb you've gotta get it in a hole

along a concrete floor,

and the amount of friction that that's gonna produce

on the bottom of the concrete,

plus its weight,

it's gonna be difficult.

- [Narrator] The weight is owing to its unusual

lead shell which is needed to preserve the body.

- You've got the person,

you've then got the lead shell,

you've then got the coffin.

So, they've all got to fit.

I bit like Russian dolls.

Right, let's go.

- [Narrator] With the funeral tomorrow,

Marcus is having a final meeting with the family,

including Easton's aunties and uncles.

- I'm Marcus.

- I'm Sandra.

- Hello, Sandra.

I know Faye, I've met Faye.

This is Patrick.

Yes, and this--

- You haven't met me, I'm Derek.

- Hello Derek, I'm Marcus.

I'll assess the situation in the church

as to whether we can carry or use the trolley.

Okay?

Is there steps at the church?

- Yes.

- [Marcus] Okay, well we can.

We'll just lift her over the steps.

I'm talking about the access in the church,

if the door's too small,

or the pews are too small.

- The door of the church needs to be?

- Well, you've got two blokes standing

with mum in the middle,

so it's got to be quite wide.

- [Narrator] After six weeks of meticulous planning,

emotions are running high,

and Easton is feeling the pressure to get it right.

- I know what I've done,

so I don't want people overriding stuff

that's already been sorted out.

I wanted just the one picture of my mum to carry,

and now everyone has tried to overtake everything,

and no one's told me anything.

- Can I just say something to you, Easton?

The pictures that I have seen,

I don't think they were appropriate.

I got one done, it's just you and your mum.

Blow it up.

- There's always a lot of stress when it comes

to a funeral 'cause it's the last thing

you can do for someone.

Whatever photographs you give me,

they're the ones I take.

You can edit it as it goes.

There are times when you've got to be a counselor.

The families might not agree on stuff,

and so you've gotta try and compromise,

and find common ground between them,

and make it as best you can for them.

- I think at that time when someone passes,

there's a lot of emotions are up and down.

Everyone may have different views on certain things,

and it's a testing time for a lot of people.

In a way, your emotions don't know how to process it

and handle it, so you just think you can blow up

when you don't mean to.

- [Narrator] It's been six months since Nathan's funeral,

and his burial site is only getting bigger.

- So, this is Nath's grave.

This is Nath's shrine.

This is where Mum comes all the time.

She's here all the time.

It's got his dog.

His little dog that stays there.

And the kids come and they put all their bits on there.

And at least he's at home, that's the main thing.

First year's the worst, isn't it?

I think as time goes on, it doesn't get easier,

it gets worse.

It's the not being on the end of the phone,

and it's the not coming,

every time you come to see him, he's not here.

I think that's the worst bit.

- [Narrator] Constantly adding to the shrine,

the family are now planning a headstone for Nathan.

A life-size statue of him made of the finest Italian marble

that will take a year to complete.

- [Interviewer] You think you'll ever stop buying stuff

and doing stuff?

- No, I think Christmas, birthday, it'll still be

come up and you put your flowers on,

and I think even if you go in the shop

you see little bits that you pick up still.

'Cause you would've done.

If you go somewhere and you see a nice shirt,

you would've bought it for him anyway.

So, it's a bit different now.

You just gotta go to the garden center and see nice bits.

But we'll always buy bits and flowers,

and keep it looking nice.

We'll never forget him.

He's still, you know...

- [Narrator] After six weeks of planning,

Easton is ready to lay his mum to rest.

- I think it was important for her to know

how much she was loved,

and how much people cherished and respected

what she done as a person.

- [Narrator] But first, they need to get

the 35-stone casket into the church.

- We can actually come up,

so effectively we're going half and half, yeah?

And then, go round.

- [Man] It's too steep, Marcus.

- And then look, boom.

- This is ridiculous.

(men talking)

- [Narrator] After all his hard work,

Easton is determined everything will

be exactly as his mum would've wanted.

- This ain't the song.

This ain't the song.

It's Thank You Mama.

This is not the song.

This is not my song.

It's not the song.

It's Thank You Mama, I know my song.

- [Man] We'll sort this out, we'll sort this out.

♪ Amazing grace how sweet the sound ♪

♪ That saved a wretch like me ♪

- Yeah, as her son,

I think, I am myself, put a lot of pressure

on myself to make sure it was right

and it was perfect for her.

I need to thank you for making our home

such a special place to grow up in.

You always put me first in every choice you made.

So, this is our final conversation.

- And he goes on to say,

I will forever remember you.

- [Easton] It's hard, I think, for anyone to lose

any of their parents or their loved one.

It's very hard.

But for me, it's because like right this is my mum,

she's like my best friend.

In a way I lost my best friend.

- [Narrator] Today, one in 10 of us preplan our funerals.

So, talking about what happens to us when we die

is becoming less of a taboo.

- This is our embalming room.

Embalming, in a nutshell, is a series of injections

that remove the blood and the other fluids,

and replace them with something that

is very similar in appearance,

but will just stop any of the deterioration.

- [Narrator] One client who's keen to plan her funeral

is 44 year old Shawn.

- I've had open-heart surgery.

I found I'd had a really big four centimeter

hole in my heart, and I've been in hospital.

- [Kirsty] And you've had that all of your life?

- Yeah, I didn't even know, it was misdiagnosed.

Yeah.

I just panic because I have three children as well.

It just made me extremely anxious,

and as soon as I came out and I got well,

I knew I had to sort it out and get it--

- [Kirsty] Get things sorted.

- Yeah.

- I think that actually everybody thinks about death

and thinks about their own funeral

and their own mortality.

Whether they'd admit to you or not that they have,

is another thing.

- And what about makeup, who do you want to do you makeup?

- Do you do makeup?

- I was gonna say I could do your makeup.

You said about being buried or cremated,

you know that they are the options.

- Yeah.

- The other options are things

like people have had cryogenics.

- What's that?

- That's where you're sort of like frozen.

That's around about 80,000 pounds just for your head.

This is the showroom.

- [Narrator] With more people now organizing their own,

this is just one example of the changing attitudes

towards funerals.

- I think the most important thing

is that we always try to push the boundary.

If a client wants something that

doesn't appear in our brochure,

let's see if we can find it.

If a client wants something that

we've never heard of before,

let's see what we can do.

- I wondered if it was possible to have a glass coffin?

Almost like a Snow White glass,

you know, fairy tale glass coffin?

- We live in an age now, where people do expect

so much more.

And what may have been considered,

or was outrageous in the past,

by some of our families now

is considered a really fitting and proper way

to say goodbye to their loved one.

- [Narrator] For his mum's final journey,

Easton has arranged for a second mode of transport

in the form of a horse-drawn carriage

to take Sharon through the streets of East London

to the cemetery.

- [Easton] Two, three, now go.

Go, go, go.

Wrong way, wrong way.

- Am I facing the wrong way?

- [Easton] Yes, you're facing the wrong way.

- [Narrator] It's time for Easton's mum to be put

in her final resting place,

her own chamber in the catacombs.

- [Marcus] Now, turn.

Now, turn.

Now, turn.

- Can you come to the right a bit, please?

That's it.

A tiny bit, that's it, perfect.

- [Easton] Watch the wood everyone, yeah.

Watch the wood.

- Watch your fingers, watch your fingers.

So, lift and slide.

- [Men] One, two, three.

- [Easton] Lift as we push.

- [Marcus] And one, two, three.

Yes.

(clapping)

- Emotional.

My day has been so emotional,

but I think that's the last of the emotion,

and now, it's rejoicing and celebrating time.

Eat, drink, and celebrate her life,

and then, dance.

Gonna see a lot of dancing.

(upbeat music)

- [Narrator] In keeping with the Caribbean tradition,

the funeral party dances into the night.

- You see, it's more of a cultural thing.

Dance which we know is always about celebration,

so, it's just more about celebrating that person.

(upbeat music)

Some people say that you're mad for spending

what you spent.

You know when you sit down and actually think about it,

could be a mortgage.

(laughs)

But what is money compared to love, really.

(upbeat music)