Original subtitles

Recently, at the underground subway in New York,

Mary passengers have been hunt

But they are not hunt by robbers

They are being hurt by such a costume

Ever since Madonna wearing it after the concert

It drove all the American crazy

All the woman take it as a model blindly

That's why during peak hour in the subway

There were 36 passengers being hunt in the crowded condition

Four of them are quite dangerous

The rest of them have left the hospital after medical treatment

And the government planned to prohibit this costume on sale

It has been passed today Legislative Council

That after midnight it will be counted

as adult time

From tomorrow onwards, you can at midnight

Watch adult programs

The gov't expect that entrainment business will have a strike

So the treasury will have 30% less income

Because less people go out, therefore the no of crimes

Will have 30% less as well

That's all for tonight's news, good night

Roller and then music

Music

Switch off the mic

It's been told that your husband is not so alight recently

Do you need my help?

Are you tempting me?

Why not?

Have you prepared the condom?

Am I so dirty?

Everyone knows that you are a playboy

I am afraid that you got Aids

The mic hasn't been switched off, it's on air now

Not yet switch off

Daring II am joking

Underwear! Three for ten only

Buy more for exchange

You don't have to be afraid of wetting it when watching TV I want black one

Black is mysterious

Taxi

Taxi

Do you want to eat something? No problem

How about Kowloon Tong? OK

Taxi is coming

I am hurried back home to watch TV

Hey hey!

Mr Chin, take me out, OK?

NO, I am in a hurry

Kiss me!

Mr Chin, pay and fuck me NO

please

No way

She's really skillful

Damn it

please

No3 Cook Street, 6/F please

Sixth floor?

An Indian

Mr Chin, I beg you please

please don't ignore me Please fuck me

I beg you Don't ask me to fuck you

Maybe I pay you

I don't want any money I want to be fucked

I am afraid of you, alright come in

Damn it The escalator is under repair

I am on the 6/F

Damn it

The TV show is on now

I have rheumatism I can't walk

It's show time now, can you take me right there?

I am on the 6/F

No problem

Sit well

Sir, we are hurried home to watch the TV

We are hurried home to watch the TV as well

It's on

It's on

My dearfriends

It's time for M Darling Shafer

The name of the program doesn't matter, right?

I know you love to see me, right?

I won't let you down

A man drove into a parking place

It's all full, only one parking place was left

But it's reserved

Time was limited

He removed the reserved block, and parked the car there

He saw a pretty woman when getting off the car

She's waving hand to him

She was look like Lam Ching Hae and Wong Jo Yin Mr Chin

Herfigure was fitter than Kung Li Mr Chin

The man thought he had met an affair

He approached her

When seeing him, the woman smiled

She pulled down the zipper of his pants

She took out his litter brother and smoothed it

The man was very excited and said

Miss, why do you love me so much?

I love you?

Damn it, don't park at my place any more

There was a village

No one had been a top successful candidate

The superiors felt no good

Someone suggested to send a boy to the temple for one night

Hope that the saint will give him some anlightment

They asked the boy the next day

Have the saint come to your dream?

Yes

What did he said?

I can't remember it all

It seems like what

All the superiors wondered what's that mean

They discussed it over

That the little brother of the status was quite small

So they rebuilt it again

And made it even larger than a horse's penis

But after ten more years

No one had been a successful candidate as well

Meanwhile, the boy had been grown up

One day, he remembered his dream

He told the superiors

He said the saint told him

No one study hard in the village

That's why no one be the top candidate

It's none of my damn business

Good reaction! Tell more about the organs

Tell thejoke of gay

Have you heard of a story of a sleepy poet?

He had a friend from San Francisco

They shared the same bed

The sleepy man fell sound sleep very quickly

His friend, seeing a chance, started the action

But the sleepy man was unconscious

He told his friend the following day

It's strange, I had a funny dream last night

And I have written down a poem

Tell me

The dream is strange and the ass hole is wide opened

It seems like shitting, but something seems to enter

Really shit

A man went to Macao to see car racing

It was full, only standing place was available

He had to stand behind someone

The guy in front was very annoying!

He always moved from one side to another side

He was so angry

Hey, can you stand still? I can't see it

But the man said, Sir, I am really sorry

For I've been a sailor for the many years

Once I stand still I have to move from one side to the other

You are crazy

Why I was not like that after making love for so many years?

It's time for 'Queries for sex'

A friend wrote and asked me

He said since last time being crowded in a MTR

He was squeezed with a female student

He ejected very quickly after squeezing

He was addicted to such a habit

He always wanted to go to MTR

He asked me should he be counted as satyr?

Does he need to cut off this bad habit?

What's your opinion?

Sir, how about yours?

Please face the camera

Does he need to cut off this bad habit?

Say it out

There are always sexual demand in MTR

Granny, do you have any opinion?

He doesn't need to cut off this habit

Why?

He only needs to cut off his 'peanut'

Fantastic

Uncle Jim

Then what's bird and stick?

Bird means the soft one

Stick means hard one

One is wasting the soft one

And one is wasting the opportunity

You

Uncle Jim, mine is only 3, is it odd?

It's common

Mine is only a bit double yours

Uncle Jim, my girlfriend needs much I can't stand it

Have you any ways to solve it?

Easy, pass her to me

I will solve it with herfor you

Let's go!

I'm a script writer only I can't be the MC

Don't play me OK?

So you've to train yourself

Manager

Tea for you

Don't you know that our show has broken a new record!

Few advertisement companies want you to appear in the show To play verbal advertisement

What? Verbal advertisement?

No way!

Yes way!

No yes way

Yes no yes way

I'll do my way

By the contract, I'd tell jokes only

How can I advertise too?

The Sales Dept is calling for help Help once OK?

No way

Do you want me to do it?

Any advantage?

The Taiwan Advertisement Co want to promote you to Taiwan

Consider it

No! No! No! No consideration

It's not advertisement It's really delicious

May I know your name?

He is busy, why don't you go first?

I'll call you tonight

Have you changed your pager no?

Remember the number

18,121,111,812,111

Call before 12 You'll have special account

It's for you

He loves me He treats me so good

Uncle Jim, chat at my home tonight, OK?

OK, tonight

I don't have my part tonight

Club, the favourite of men

The jokes repeat and repeat Another 1/2 year passed

Uncle Jim!

Yourjokes are fantastic!

Really?

It's really hard to wear ancient costumes in summer time

Yeah, the sweat falls down like pouring

Uncle Jim, don't fool me

You know I will be a fool in front of the camera

I think you will have improvement

How's the draft of tomorrow? It's ready?

I have already finished drafting it

But it has been blown away by the wind

Can't you give me a better excuse?

Wind can only blow from outside into your house

How come vise versa?

I turned on the fan at home

Uncle Jim, boss wants to see you

What's wrong?

I don't know, may be because the watching point has dropped

Do you know the nick name of tuna fish?

What's it Nonsense fish

It can't be like this, Uncle Jim

The sponsor wanted to terminate the contract

I am talking to you

Continue

Ok, let's discuss about the watching point

This is the chart of last week

Drop

Yesterday

Drop again

Today

Drop further

Let's look back last year's chart

Think something new OK?

I'll discuss it with the scriptwriter

Why do you answer my phone?

Who is it?

Have you finished the draft?

Blaming again

I have finished it already

It's boring! How can the audiences laugh?

Then how?

Let's go to eat something I will show you the real life

Lovely Temple Street! Can you move now?

This is great!

All tourists

Appreciate it

We love Temple Street

Fantastic here!

I think that it won't rain today

Uncle Jim there are seats over there

Temple Street is wonderful

What do you want? Wonton noodle

Wonton noodle

Ox sinew and woton noodle

Ox sinew and woton noodle

He knows that you are useless

Here is the night club of the lower range, you can feel the real life

You are off now

I love Temple Street We love Temple Street

Everything's cheap Everything is so cheap

Everything is very cheap

Everything is good and not expensive

Hey men there is a Temple Street in HK

And this street is very famous

The lyric is so cheap, really nonsense

Maybe they like this cheap thing

If he can be famous, I will cut off my head for the coup

Art can be of different types

Nonsense can be one type of art as well

I don't want to eat any more

What's wrong?

Anyone makes you angry

I have been scolded by the boss today

Apple polish me now

Are you kidding? Here?

Of course! Come on

Come on Be quick

Uncle Jim! Here comes Uncle Jim!

He's my idol I admire him

Thank you! Let us ask him for a signature and have a photo as well

Take my pen

Really touchable

The Open Night Bazaar is more comfortable than the disco

Here is full of lovely music and the singers sing well

Cheers, light and relax

The food of the stall can't be eaten

Uncle Jim, don't you have to record for the show?

I have recorded it in the afternoon

Then means we can see it tonight! Yeah

Take your seat

Ti Kun Yim?

Pickles and chilli

As usual

Your show drove me crazy last night

Really? Why are you not crazy now?

Here is the salary of this month

Five thousand again!

We have said to share it half and half

Then how much have we gained actually?

I don't want to tell you

I am afraid you will be overproud

How come? I have bought a house for you in Canada

And a car and a servant

And a dog as well

I've never planned to immigrate

Why don't you seek a wife for me?

So, you are old fashioned!

If not me what will you be?

I have invested for you

Where are the waiters?

What are you laughing?

A man though his penis is long enough

Tojoin the 'Long Man Club'

The guard didn't allow him to enter

He asked how long is his?

Mine is 9 inches long

The guard said I am guarding the entrance with 12 inches long One, two, three, laugh

Theirs are long enough to tie a bow Laugh again

My joke is really wonderful

It depends on the one who tell thejokes

You can try if you don't believe

Face the camera and tell a joke, see if anyone laugh

No, I am not used to face the camera

Wife, I have told him of the immigration plan as well tonight

What else can I tell Kwong if he asks me next time?

You can say you have invested for him

You can tell him you have bought the place for him after death

It's so trouble, why don't we clean the amount to him

Is it better to have money inside your own pocket?

It's good luck that I am still attractive

It's you who can't

Recharge

Can you be quick? How long have I to wait?

Recharge quickly

Lottery ticket

Am I going back to the sixties?

Porsche?

Lottery ticket

Brother Kwong

Two red beans sundae

Two dollars and six

So cheap?

Yeah!

Five dollar and seep the change

Thank you

Do you know I am missing you?

Brother Kwong

Sorry, wrong place

Brother Kwong, my mom is in the hospital

The doctor said she is having cancer in her breast

My sister got blood cancer as well

My father has passed away last week

It's cancer too!

What?

No, cancer in the thumb

My idiot brother being sent to a school in Lok Fu Ann

Why are the members of yourfamily are so hard

I have to support them all

My life is really tough

Much more poorer than me!

Chu Chu, don't be sad

I'll try my very best

I will help you to pass it easily

Don't cheat me

No, how come I will cheat you

Kwong

Chu Chu

No, you have to have a serious make-up

Uncle Jim, I am in need of help

What's the matter?

I need a large sum of money, Uncle Jim

Can I take back my share?

You are being cheated by the whore again?

Don't insult her

That means yes

I don't care, just give me back my share

Kwong, listen to me

My words are sweet right

My words are skillful, right

Again

That's it

Do you think so?

That's it

That's it

Let's continue our sweet words

Disguise to be hunt seriously

The make-up

Serious make up again?

Right

Ok

It's good, let's get in

Uncle Jim Hello

Uncle Jim, what do you want to eat?

Beancurd and minced pork in chilli sauce

Beancurd and minced pork in chilli sauce

Let me introduce something to you

What so good?

Ourfather in heaven

One is called interlude, it's good Alright

What's that?

The restaurant have beautiful names for those common dishes

Hello!

Uncle Jim

I have a good plan

What plan?

We what's it? Shrimp dumpling

One

I have written many jokes for you?

So what

Chiu Chau Damn!

What?

Chiu Chau dumplings

Do you want one?

Yeah

All thejokes can be published into a book

You want to publish them?

Yeah

What?

Do you want it?

Sorry

I have ordered many dishes

You can just give the draft to him and it's OK

Yeah

Uncle Jim, can the dishes be taken out?

Of course, be quick

Yes

Ourfather in heaven

I have already said that it is only a name

Beancurd and minced pork in chilli sauce

Beancurd

This is quite well

What's the next dish?

Interlude

Virgin?

Siu loong bun It's the vinegar

plus ginger

Good

Vinegar and ginger

Congee or rice?

Count the head

Each one one bowl

Serve your self

Eat when it's still hot More rice

One, two, three, four

Seven, six, five, four

I have do exactly forty nine times! Why not?

What's that?

It's a rule

You tell the manager of the station tomorrow

That all thejokes are written by you

Every scriptwriter will have the royalty

All thejokes are told by you

The audience can be the witness

Then what's the matter with the scriptwriter?

Only those in front of the screen can have such benefit

2111, call back home

page urgently for me

You have record as well now

Ask them to produce cassette as well

2111, call back home page till he returns call

Continue to page, damn it

Damn it, continue to page

please wait

Thank you

You are going up for the manger?

Yeah

Don't panic when you see the manager

Why?

He walks strange! I'll say instead of you

Know it?

As what you said

Manager

This is my student

Take your seat Elsie, give us some coffee

I want to publish my jokes into a book

I want to sell to the right to our publisher

What do you think?

We can share the benefit

Let me have a look first

Yeah, I have taken it with me

Yeahl have taken it

I will see it tonight

Let me do it, you don't know how

About the royalty

You think of a way to calculate it

It's really strange!

Not yet

Coffee

I don't want, thanks

I am thirsty

Don't make it sick!

Always kissing

She is like Lin Ching Hae

The seventies?

Chu Chu

Chu

May I?

Brother Kwong

Chu Chu Brother Kwong

Don't worry

I have prepared the money to bury your dad and care your mom

Support your brother and send your sister over seas for operation

Thank you, Kuong

But when will you have the money?

Soon

My idiot brother hunt the ked next door yesterday

I have to pay for compensation

May I?

That's all I have, take them

Thank you, brother Kwong

Chu Chu

No I will be pregnant like that

Damn it

Chairman Lai

Give me some wine

Really?

James, I want to be an actress, can you show me the way?

You are so greedy of luxury

Come and take a seat here

Give me some wine

So many diamonds, is it real?

Sure

Let me have a look

Wine please

Do you recognize me?

I want tojoin the beauty contest, norminate me, ok? You have worm!

Let me remove it for you

Wine!

He deserves dying!

Why don't you let me in? You'd wear suit!

This is traditional one It's not allowed

please give me face

Cheap men!

Dog

You'd not come here!

Why the name of the author is you?

Printing mistake only

But you'd give me money still! I'm in urgent need

Cheat again by the whores

Don't insult my girlfriend I am really in need of money

You have to ask from my wife

You know all the money re kept by her

What re you two doing? So annoying!

It's good you are here, I want to check something with you

Check what? Your money have been invested in Canada

Not that I mean the royalty of the book

It's your book?

The jokes are told by him, that is his royalty!

Yourjokes are written for him, that means it is his as well

But the jokes are all written by me

Written by you, you think you are really a genius?

You are rascal only!

I think you are wrong

Genius nowadays are all as ugly as me

Only those on the movies are handsome

What do you want?

I am not afraid of you even you have powerful back-ground

Captain

I'm not triad now! Take him out, he's a liar

Don't fool me

You want to cheat all my money together with your wife

Take all the money with you after death!

Get out, don't stand still like a penguin

The purpose of coming here is to acquaint more wealthy men

Chairman Chan

May we have some hit songs?

Of course

Rock and roll

Do you still want some wine, drunkard

Damn you

please help

Hold it please

I want to see Director Lee

Boss is waiting for you

Boss is waiting for you

Don't face me

I want tojoin your station

I have a plan to defeat the opposite station

Welcome here!

Can we shake the other hand?

Uncle Jim, time's up, are you ready?

Ok, get out

Me

You write it, I will get out, write it yourself

Crazy

Uncle Jim

Really crazy?

Big trouble

Uncle Jim

Really big trouble

Hello, everybody

All the audience tonight

Are in good luck

For I decide to tell you something

Which I have treasured it for years

And to share it among you - my friends

The topic tonight

Will be the art sex in Chinese culture

Are you out of your mind, such topics?

First, let's see 'Dream of the red chamber'

It's also known as 'Encyclopedia of the Sexual Life'

It was written there sex is full of mystery

No matter the idea, the invention or the frontier

It shows that sex isjust very common

The no1 sex book of china - Kam Ping Mui

Using different ways of description

To exaggerated the sexual organs, sexual behaviors and sexual impulse

Sexual feeling and sexual appearance

Actually it's just the deformed opinion of sex

What are you doing?

It's boring

They use many adjectives

To describe sexual behaviours I'm so bored!

But I think the words used by our people in HK

The slang, like funk, suck

They are more fitted and active

Specially the last two words

They are really fantastic

Trouble

So

Your mother is a woman, she has married a man named Chan

Always quarrel for two bugs, and scared of homeless

You are afraid of injection and murmured of being poor?

You feel dizzy when have high fever and always being cheated

You are most frightened of getting aids

You are really in bad luck, say it out if you want to

I take two hundred only

Two hundred only

I don't go whoring

I have money for whoring

If you get cold, better eat some chicken

No matter how you behave

I prefer ordering chicken rice

I am not telling something to frighten you, it's true

All of them said that I am No1 in fortune telling

Thank you

Hey man

Do you want to appear in the TV?

What?

Don't be frightened, follow me

Take your seat

Mr Wan, I am the Executive producer of the Happy Station

We want to invite you to appear in our midnight show

You have frightened me Don't be nervous! Are you interested then?

That the way Ahl like it Ok If you are interested

You have to obey my arrangement

I will design a new image for you

No problem no problem

Alrightit's deal, Mr Wan

Ok

That man always said I have taken his goal

He will sure fire me this time

Now let's design you a new image

I will bugger you if you don't pay

No Stylistic

This one is better

That hair style is better than this one

Do you want to be a beggar as well?

They have spray too much gold on my body

Really cheap

Cheap cheap, you have to be really very cheap

Fight between the abalone and sea cucumber

Read it thoroughly

I am not at home now

please leave immediately after screaming

Never call me again

Go!

Work hard

Try your best!

Come down!

Why are you so happy?

Because

We talked about sex literature

Our boss said it's not popular

So we will talk about psychiatric behaviour in sex

The Shanghaiese like to themselves like this

Italian like this way

Cantonese like this

But it's too powerless!

Actually, our action

Reveal our mind

Go Up!

Check!

Hold it!

Attack!

Professor poon Kwong Tan wrote something about sex psychology

Welcome the Prince of Temple Street, Mr Wan Kwong

Snow white and the seven dwarfs, they sleep together

The seven dwarfs seduced Snow White the whole night

Tough they are only dwarfs

They are all over-indulged in sex

They all are ready!

And said they all wanted to fuck tonight!

Snow White is worried when seeing their behaviors

One of them wants this and the other one wants that

The fancy bra of Snow White has been taken off

And then her underwear as well

The dwarfs took out their 'weapons'

They surround Snow White

Good reaction Encore!

There are three sexy women in a hotel in Hollywood

Theirfigures are fantastic

We then go to bed

Touching their breasts and their hips

They are really fantastic

They all want to be excited

One of them falls to the ground when holding my parts

I rescue her immediately and hold her tight

She is very talkative

She said she is no 1

She have oral slunt

Miss A is coquettish, Miss B is tall

I am only one man band

I haven't got time to touch Miss C, neither

She has prepared herself

Last night I was one man band in the hotel

Single man action

But I am defeated now

It's beautiful already

I don't want to sleep

You are so beautiful

Ohl don't want to sleep

Saturday night fever

Bad boys

Bad girls?

Let's go to court some guys Good

I want to be movie star, appoint me in your next film, ok?

Brother Kwong

Chu Chu

Gone with the wind

Chu Chu, I haven't got the amount yet

But I will give you my salary of this month

It's not so good

Why not?

Thank you

Even if he's seriously hunt, it can be rescued

But tell me what to do with this rubbish?

Think of a way to save your own show

I wonder

Why people now like to see those cheap stuffs

His figure is cheap, songs are cheap

Everything so cheap

lt' nothing but cheap

It's the trend nowadays

You have to be cheaper than him

Wear and say something that's cheap

And play cheap with the audience

You ask me to act cheap?

I am the pioneer

I can't be defeated by such a cheap man

They have a telephone research

More people watch their show

That's only what they announce

They have already planned it

They want to fool me around

Don't you think that you are very important!

You will be fired by the station no sooner

And then I will leave you too

You leave me? Who will make love with you then

Go to hell

Really

No

Yeah

It's new

I love it

Uncle Jim, you are very late tonight

You are off now?

Take your own seat

What do you want?

Ti Kum Yan, pickle and pepper

pickles are sour already, don't eat too much

The show of the other station last night was fantastic

Why don't you go to die?

Damn it

You learn how court girls?

Why don't you rent a car?

My lovely audience

Do you think I look cheap today?

What's your opinion?

Actually I can be so cheap

I will not tell you any dirty jokes tonite

I will sing you some cheap song

There is hot stuff in the hole

The stick turns soft

I am married today

Let me get to bed after going to toilet

Let me pull down the blind

Shut up

Copy cat

Sleep on the bed with a girl

No creative!

I am really excited

I want to do it one more time for it's so excited

It's so cheap, I can't stand it myself

Do you like it

Encore

Cheers, let me make love cheers

Let us make love together, be happy

We are perished

Do you like it?

One more

I can sacrifice myself to make you happy

What game in this world do you think is wonderful?

What thing will make you happy?

What so excited for a man in nude Except for Yip Yuk Hing in nude

The most wonderful thing is to make love

Even it's so painful to deliver, mom still want to do it

Is there anyone in this world who doesn't like make love

You feel excited only by being so cheap

Sir, the testimony is OK

Just ask him to sign on it

He has signed already, please take a look

It's ok, don't bother me with such little thing

Sir, let me help you

Have a bun first

Can he be a bit sensible?

He doesn't need to show a nude man in his show

Give me some veal

You can ask his wife to tell you something bad about him

Dirty Jim

Do you know I am looking for you?

It's me who is looking for you too!

What for?

Then why are you looking for me?

I want to have a TV show together with you

What do you think?

What are you doing?

To answer you yes

Good co-operation

Good co-operation

See what can you do now?

My dear audience

Thank you for your support

Something special today

For beside me

I have the honour in inviting the Queen of the Temple Street

The Sexy Funny Cat Miss Mimi to join our show

Mimi

Mimi, I have heard that you and that cheap man

You've been living together

Any secrets to tell us?

Yeah, we used to live together

He's my husband

That means my men And my boy friend as well

The cheap image he has in front of you

It's fake

I have taken some video secretly of him before

I show you now

Finest Home video

I don't know why he loves to read so much?

I really don't want to meet him when I am gambling

I'm cheap! I'm very cheap! Cheap! Cheap!

He is still innocent in such an age

I love you, duckling

Don't take it, no

Don't you think it's common for him to have milk before bed?

Actually he's abnormal

On your knee, no resistant

I want you to be on your knees, be quick

He's so abnormal to love small pets than me

Are you scared? Let me hug you

The emotion of this cheap man is of loyalty

Not yet? He has a big big secret

What big secret?

He practised singing every week

What type of songs? Sex song

Can't it be on air?

Alleluah

Alleluah

He's not cheap at all, he's so loyal

What so fun to watch?

After the commercial break, it's my turn

To sing for you

Bye, see you later

I love you

That woman is cute

I am sexy pussy Cat

Big pocket

Have you seen today's newspaper?

The watching point of Happy Station has dropped a lot

The happy station is beaten down by is opposite station

Big sale in Welcome, only two forty for one coke

Damn

What shall we do?

Tell me what we can do

We can use it to wrap the food, to set the table

And fold it into an aeroplane

Damn it

Big Pocket I have some new idea for tonight

What so new?

Dancing

We two

We two will dance

Can it be done

No

He asked my wife to announce my shit

I can ask my wife to announce his secrets as well

Big Pocket

Objection

Why?

You all inviting these busy bodies appear on the show

What can we do then?

That mean our brains are useless

You are right, you are useless

Get out immediately

You these bull shit, damn it

Sir

How's the weather today, Miss?

It will be a fine day except some district will have thunder storm

And sunlight at might time

And HK is expected to be fine for the following days

It's your turn, Chiu Yin Chun

Good

How many of you, sir?

I am looking for someone

Welcome

Have you seen my show last night?

Yes Thank you

I am excited now

I am ready to present you all my youth

The sun will rise again tomorrow morning

and the flowers will blossom again next year

My youth passed away

And my youth will never come back

And my youth will never come back

Oh

Oh

And my youth will never come back

Brother Kwong Chu Chu

Thank you

Kwong, is the money ready or not?

That's all

That's all?

I have quitted my job, and that's salary for two months

That mean

That's all?

Nothing else

I still have you

That means you are without money

But we got love

So long, farewell

John

Let's go

Ok

Don't come to my home, call me if you want

No, let's keep in touch by mail

please don't go

I haven't cheated you but you cheat me

It's your turn to sing

Shit

Women

Don't cheat us men

The heart of a man

Is made of iron

Good

Thank you

From today onwards, we will have a guest MC

And she is

Madam May-wife of Uncle Jim

Let's welcome Madam May

Dear audience

First I want to make clear something here

No doubt, Uncle Jim is my husband

But, actually

He is the right one

Sooner I found out he's not as much excited at all

Later

I've met Penasonic

penasonic

The size of the Japanese are always so small

We got divorced and then I married pierre Cardan

Oh, Pierre, Pierre

I missed him so much

Then I found out

All of them can only be counted as part time lover

For they have a shortcoming, and that is

They can't last for a long time

Finally

I found him

Mobile Dickson

It's so perfect

It's wonderful!

Dickson Dickson

I need you, I need your comfort

Dickson!

Only if the lady smile, mine will swing Swing and wing

I will have high fever if she turns around and look

High fever

My whole body will jump up

My ass will like the tide

And mine will be as hard as the wood

And the waist

And the lady will smile secretly Laugh

They said mine is big

She will immediately take off her underwear and do it with me His is small

The lady screamed

And said that mine is big enough

To fill her place, and that mad lady laugh

Isn't it like this?

Dear audience, today I, professor of sexual love

Will discuss the relationship between physiognomy of men and their sexual ability

Here comes the live sample

He is born weak

What?

Please approach to me

See the way he walks

please zoom to his foot

Her legs

You can see that he has something wrong with his kidneys

What?

Sit sown

Take a deep breath

Zoom to the chest

Her chest! And his breathe is not so good as well

It can be shown, your lasting power is low

please cut to see the audiences reaction

It can only be lasted for half a minute

Where are the audiences?

Men have there big taboos

Weak kidneys, impotent, soft!

Sisters, you have to be very careful

If you found the man next to you

Has above characteristics

Think deeper before you choose

Cut the advertisement

To wear the bra of 'Felafare'

The men will sure approach you

Cut!

Jim, what you are doing?

What we can do?

You mean it?

Bastard!

Well, I will sing one off key for you

All around the world

You?

To search my faithful man

I sing with you

We love each other

And I can sing the wrong track one as well

Ah

That's enough, damn you

Ah

Get away, bull shit

Ah

We are in love!

Are you crazy?

You crazy! You wolf!

Are you crazy?

Don't you think you are the boxing king?

I quit

Why so close? Leave me alone

You don't have to say

I know you want to ask for pardon

Hey

You feel sorry?

Want to apologize with me?

Don't you think it will be alright to say sorry?

I'm not narrow minded

I have forgiven you already

Take the food! You arejobless!

How can you live without me?

I am sure you'll beg for me

Bull shit

Uncle Jim, come in and have some noodle

Uncle Jim is here, ask him for the signature

Can you see Uncle Jim? He's eating in there

Ask for his signatures!

He's a TV star, ask for his signatures

He is greatest king of comedy Want for an autograph?

He's out of time, no one loves to see his show! Ask for his signature

Are you wakening now?

Come back and help me

I can't work without you

Let's go, don't be so down

Let's go some other place to drink

How will be our future?

And how will be our life?

Finish

How many rounds have we played for the whole night?

That's yours, take this

More or less twenty-four rounds! How much have you lost?

I have lost a lot

I already said it's not good to play with a bald head

play at my Church next times

Hey

Master, we are of nothing

Enlighten us, please

Don't fool us

Are you enlighteded us with prayers

No, I am enjoying my chocolate

Chocolate?

Master

I beg you, please enlighten us

You will get it if you have luck

Don't stop me from sleeping

He makes funny feel before us Master, why do you make such funny face?

Funny? Funny

Funny Temple

Remember the word Temple

Does it mean to ask me to return to Temple Street?

Yeah

Return to Temple Street?

I am coming

Be quick

You are so vulgar

I have heard that you still compained that your small busts

Have you planned to make it bigger?

We are from 'Eyes on the Entertainment World'

Nowadays Madam Hing is well known all around

Have you planned to be in nude in order to compete with her?

If you really make your busts larger

Will they burst?

Dear audience, after the show of 'Queries for sex'

It's my turn to sing

Are you very anxious?

Don't be anxious, I will sing now

What's the matter?

It's advertisements time

I haven't sung yet!

Keep it yourself

You have lost your mysterious image already

No one wants to hear you singing

Why? How come?

How come?

What shall I do?

How do I know?

Go back to Temple Street

And take this as a dream

Bull shit

Dear audience

Are you anxious in seeing me?

We have many audiences tonight

I want to be close to you

Let's shorter our distance

And let us breath the same air

So that you don't have to get up and down

Isn't it?

Thank you for all the support

I know my show will like my figure

Never change!

Ever hard!

Always welcomed by you

For your support

Thank you

Zoom in

All are seen!

No more use for us

Ask some Thailand gays to take her place

So big!

I've seen that!

My girlfriend's is much more beautiful than hers

This is the 18th times we announce with Vietnam dialogue Madam May has shown her secret parts

Attention please

The feeling is very close for me to play jokes here

What is meant by blowing trumpet by penis?

Bull shit

What is meant by smoke after sex?

What?

It's finished

There's a man who's forty something

And he's called Jim

His wife loves money so much and change

She always tell others that he's useless

Who are you singing about?

Other's wife

I will be angry if anyone mention about wife

I don't want to see you

It's not right for you to be here

And you are so cheap to sing such kind of song

He's really funny

How come he a TV star comes to sing here in Temple Street

lfirst think that he will not like to change

It's really not wise to be like this

If not of you so cheap

How will my fame be dropped so fast

But you are cheaper than the shit

You cheap

Then means I am really very cheap Right

But that's what they want Yeah!

I have to face such pressure

Actually I really don't want it

You seems to be rather poor

And I have a lot to tell about myself

If they like you, you will supreme

If they don't like you, you will be like a shit

For this painful experience

Actually we are very poor

Let! Sing

Let's continue singing

Let's continue singing

Hey

You are kidding

See the audience, they like you sing so much

I am looking for my own way

Fish ball!

Blow the whistle

The luminous rod

Two whistles for seven dollars

Condom! $1 for 3

You can buy everything here

Be quick, the show is going to start now

Welcome to the HK Stadium to enjoy our show

The first to appear is prince of Temple Street - Mr kk Wan

And then the God-father of Dirty Culture-Jim

Thank you all 'Dirty Fans'

Welcome to our 'Dirty Culture Concert'

This is my 38th show today

It's our last show as well

Are you happy?

I love to get hold of the busts

I love the large, round, and smooth one

Thank you, thank you for your support

The Chinese ladies are really sexy

And the European ladies will suit me too

The busts of the western ladies are usually bigger

But don't be so greedy

It will be useless if even your hands can't hold it full

Right

It's more fantastic

And it's so wonderful that there are three Big busts

Kidding Too early to dream

Wow, I can hold it and kiss it as well

Do, re, me, my hands are itching

I really want to hold it

Hold

Hold

Hold

Come on if you dare

Hold

Chairman Mao is the greatest guy

But not as big as the busts

All the human beings depend on big busts

Without them, your health will not be so good

But there is a weak point of the busts

If once they become crazy

They will not let one go

They will force you to hold them tight

Come out

The jokes tonight are all written by you

Bust, is the origin of human lives

You have to depend all on them without milk powder

Yeah

It's too big I can't hold it

My sisters said that they also want to hold you

Don't you know where they will hold you?

Hold

Hold

Hold

Hold

Hold

Hold

Why so ridiculous?

Why are you so scared, it's fake

I am kidding only, continue to enjoy the show

lt'll depend on my action

I am sure she will ask for help

After the intercourse, usually you will be exhausted

I really want to kick her out of the bed

But usually by that time

She will be full of passion

You have to try you very last hard

Wake up, wake up

Dear fans, after seeing this show

Don't waste your time after going home tonight

You will know in Hong Kong

So many women are waiting for fucking

Who are so lonely from night till dawn

You know what to do, right? Bye Bye

Thank you

The reaction of tonight is good

Yeah

Uncle Jim, Mr Wan, congratulation

Yes

We want to invite you two to help in our show

No, you should come to our station

We will pay you double

I will pay you triple I don't care!

I will never work with TV station

Are you kidding?

Let's go, we will not work in TV station!

It's so cheap

Our schedule will be full till end of next year

And we will start our world wide show from next week on

Good

You haven't flattered me for long

Try one more?

Me? I want something new

You, please do one more time for me

pardon me, you two play this game

I don't like it, so

You play it yourselves

Mr Wan

I can't make up the decision

Our previous show

Those seductive beings are really horrible

The Sexy pussy Cat?

Wow! They are not dancing in nude?

I am wondering what my wife's being now?

Darling

Darling

I will go out first

I will go out too

Darling, please don't go

You are the best after all

See how down you are

Yeah, I haven't shaved for long

Why don't you shave now?

You look smart now

Darling

Have you finished practised your secret collection?

What do you want?