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>> LaFonda: TONIGHT ON
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"NEWSREADERS," AN ESTIMATED
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700,000 AMERICANS COMMUTE TO
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WORK BY BIKE.
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WHY ARE THEY ALL SUCH DICKS?
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AND IT'S SOMETHING THAT ALMOST
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EVERYONE HAS IN THEIR KITCHEN,
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AND IT COULD KILL YOU, AND,
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ALSO, IT'S A KNIFE.
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ALL THAT AND MORE, TONIGHT ON
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"NEWSREADERS."
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WE BEGIN TONIGHT WITH CHILDHOOD
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INNOCENCE.
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YOU USED TO HAVE IT, BUT THEN
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SOMETHING AWFUL HAPPENED AND IT
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WAS TAKEN FROM YOU.
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BUT WHAT IF YOU STILL HAD IT,
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THE CHILDHOOD INNOCENCE?
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YOU'D BE MUCH BETTER ADJUSTED,
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AND YOU MIGHT BE ABLE TO SOLVE
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CRIMES.
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AMIR LARUSSA TELLS US HOW.
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>> MURDERS, COLD CASES,
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FORENSICS, BALLISTICS, CHALK
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OUTLINES, OTHER CRIME WORDS.
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CRIME ISN'T EXACTLY CHILD'S
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PLAY.
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WELL, TRY TELLING THAT TO
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SIX-YEAR-OLD NOAH BRAYLES.
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IN THE LAST YEAR, HE HAS SOLVED
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30 CRIMES FOR THE
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FONTAINE, NEW YORK, POLICE
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DEPARTMENT, BECAUSE THE EYES OF
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A CHILD SEE THINGS IN WAYS
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ADULTS CANNOT.
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DETECTIVE LANDAU MET NOAH THE
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WAY HE MEETS A LOT OF THE KIDS
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HE DOESN'T ARREST.
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>> ONCE A YEAR, LOCAL SCHOOL
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KIDS COME IN HERE ON A SCHOOL
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FIELD TRIP.
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WE USE IT TO IDENTIFY KIDS ON A
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POWER TRIP SO WE CAN RECRUIT
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THEM WHEN THEY'RE OLDER.
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>> BUT WHAT DETECTIVE LANDAU
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FOUND OUT WAS THAT NOAH WAS ON A
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DIFFERENT KIND OF TRIP.
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>> I TURNED MY BACK, AND THIS
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KID'S OPENED UP A FILING CABINET
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AND IS LEAFING THROUGH A BUNCH
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OF OLD MURDER-SCENE PHOTOS, AND
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HE -- HE PULLS OUT A PICTURE AND
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HE ASKS ME ABOUT THE UNICORN IN
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IT.
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AT FIRST, I TUNE HIM OUT, LIKE I
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DO ALL KIDS AND WOMEN, THEN HE
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SAYS, "UNICORNS DON'T HAVE TWO
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HORNS," AND IT HIT ME.
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TWO SHOOTERS.
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IT TURNS OUT THE TWO MOBSTERS
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WEREN'T WHACKED.
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THEY SHOT EACH OTHER!
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[ LAUGHS ]
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>> [ Laughing ] YOU GUYS SAY,
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"WHACKED"?
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>> [ Chuckling ] YEAH.
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WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU SAY?
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THE POINT IS, NOAH SOLVED A COLD
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CASE IN MINUTES.
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FOR THE RECORD, I THINK IT LOOKS
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LIKE A, UH, A GIRAFFE WITH TWO
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NECKS.
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>> IT'S KIND OF WEIRD THAT YOU
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FRAMED IT.
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>> REALLY?
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>> WE TAGGED ALONG WITH NOAH AND
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DETECTIVES FROM THE
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FONTAINE POLICE DEPARTMENT AS
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THEY INVESTIGATED A HOMICIDE IN
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AN ARTIST'S LOFT.
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>> * ARE YOU SLEEPING, ARE YOU
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SLEEPING? *
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* BROTHER JOHN *
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>> I'M GETTING TOO OLD FOR THIS
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[BLEEP]
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AND HE'S GETTING TOO YOUNG.
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>> I'M EXACTLY THE RIGHT AGE FOR
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THIS [BLEEP]
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TO NOAH, IT'S ALL A GAME -- A
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GAME THE POLICE HOPE HE PLAYS
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FOR A LONG, LONG TIME.
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>> WHY IS THIS DIRT RED?
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>> IS THAT CLAY?
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HEY, WAIT A MINUTE -- THE
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RACETRACK.
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IF NOAH HADN'T FOUND THE CLAY,
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WE WOULDN'T HAVE BROKEN THE
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CASE.
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>> MY TUMMY'S STARTING TO HURT.
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>> WELL, YOU NEED TO POOP?
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>> BUT WHAT MAKES NOAH SO GOOD
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AT THIS JOB?
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HONESTLY, I DON'T KNOW.
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I COULD GUESS, OR I COULD ASK
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NOTED CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST
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MONICA COLLANDER, WHO HAS
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STUDIED NOAH.
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>> IF NOAH'S SUCCESS CAN BE
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REPLICATED, WE COULD MAKE CRIME
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A THING OF THE PAST.
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>> I NOTICED THAT THE CRIME
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SCENE SEEMED TO GIVE HIM SOME
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KIND OF STOMACHACHE.
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>> THAT'S HOW THEY GET
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ATTENTION.
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"I'VE GOT A STOMACHACHE.
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LOOK AT ME!"
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>> "TAKE ME OUT OF THIS GRUESOME
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CRIME SCENE."
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>> THESE KIDS HAVE GOT TO GROW
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UP SOMETIME.
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IT'S LIKE FINDING OUT ABOUT
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SANTA.
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>> OR THE TOOTH FAIRY.
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>> OR LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY.
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>> IN GRAD SCHOOL.
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>> OKAY.
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>> NOAH MAY BE A GREAT CLOSER,
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BUT SOME SAY A POLICE DEPARTMENT
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IS NO PLACE FOR A CHILD.
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>> HE'S PUTTING A LOT OF PEOPLE
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OUT OF WORK, AND NOT JUST CANINE
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DETECTIVES LIKE ME.
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PSYCHICS, INDIAN TRACKERS,
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OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE GENIUSES --
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YOU NAME IT.
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>> CRIME NOVELISTS WHO SOLVE
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CRIMES ON THE SIDE.
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>> YEAH, THOSE GUYS.
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>> PEOPLE WHO CAN TALK TO DEAD
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BODIES.
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>> SURE.
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I WHISPER TO DOGS TO GET THEM TO
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DO MY BIDDING.
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HE SHOULD DO HIS JOB AND LET ME
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DO MINE.
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>> HOW MANY DOGS DO YOU HAVE?
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>> I HAVE 37 DOGS.
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>> WHAT ARE THEIR NAMES?
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>> I DON'T NAME THEM.
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THEY'RE NUMBERED.
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>> NUMBERED? 1 THROUGH 37?
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>> NO.
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>> RANDOM NUMBERS?
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>> YES.
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>> WHAT KIND OF THINGS CAN YOU
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MAKE DOGS DO?
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>> YOU KNOW, WE DO LAY DOWN,
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ROLL OVER.
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WE DO -- I HAVE ONE DOG THAT CAN
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WALK BACKWARDS.
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>> I'M HAVING A TOUGH TIME
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PICTURING HOW THEY SOLVE CRIMES
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WITH THOSE --
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>> NO, THOSE GUYS DON'T SOLVE
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CRIMES.
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>> BUT YOU KNOW WHO DOES SOLVE
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CRIMES?
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NOAH BRAYLES.
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WHICH IS WHY HE GOT THE CALL TO
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HELP INTERROGATE A SUSPECTED
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SERIAL KILLER.
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AND THAT IDEA, WHILE ADORABLE,
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TURNED OUT TO BE NOT SUCH A GOOD
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ONE.
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>> YOU'RE ONLY SIX YEARS OLD AND
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ALREADY ENSNARED IN THE
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TRIFLING BUSY WORK OF CRIME
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SOLVING.
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>> QUIT WITH THE GAMES,
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ROUSSEAU.
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>> TELL ME, NOAH, YOU
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INVESTIGATE DEATH, BUT DO YOU
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ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN
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YOU DIE?
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>> YOU...FALL ASLEEP?
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>> YOUR HEART STOPS.
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YOU STOP BREATHING.
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EVERY CELL IN YOUR BODY SCREAMS
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OUT IN PAIN, UNWILLING TO GIVE
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UP LIFE, BUT IT'S HOPELESS.
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YOU FALL ASLEEP...FOREVER.
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>> [ Weakly ] I DON'T WANT TO BE
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DEAD.
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>> THAT TURNED OUT TO BE NOAH'S
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LAST DAY ON THE JOB.
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NOW HE LIVES THE LIFE OF A
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NORMAL KID -- EXCEPT FOR THE
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FACT THAT HE STOPPED SPEAKING
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THAT DAY AND NOW HAS CONSTANT,
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UNCONTROLLABLE SEIZURES.
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NOAH'S RETIRED, BUT SOME OF HIS
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MAGIC DID RUB OFF ON
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DETECTIVE LANDAU.
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>> I USED TO THINK I WAS TOO OLD
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FOR THIS POO-POO.
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THE TRUTH IS, I WASN'T YOUNG
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ENOUGH.
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>> WHAT'S THAT?
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>> OH, THAT'S A SHARK EATING A
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HOUSE.
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>> NOAH MADE THAT?
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>> NO. I DID.
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>> MM.
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DETECTIVE LANDAU MAY NOT BE
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MOVING ON, BUT THE
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FONTAINE POLICE DEPARTMENT IS.
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THEY'VE NOW TURNED TO ANOTHER
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MASTER OF THE OBSERVATIONAL,
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LOCAL STAND-UP COMEDIAN CHUCK P.
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>> AND WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THIS
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BLOODY EARRING RIGHT HERE?
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I FEEL LIKE I'M IN LADY GAGA'S
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WARDROBE CLOSET.
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THANKS A LOT, GUYS.
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>> LaFonda: LATER ON IN THE
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PROGRAM -- GAS PRICES.
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AM I RIGHT?
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BUT FIRST, BOSTON,
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MASSACHUSETTS, IS KNOWN FOR MANY
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THINGS -- FENWAY PARK, CLAM
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CHOWDER, OVERT RACISM, QUIET
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SIMMERING RACISM, AND RACISM
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THAT IS MEANT AS A JOKE BUT THAT
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IS STILL RACISM.
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BUT WHEN WE THINK OF BOSTON, WE
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ONLY REALLY THINK OF ONE THING.
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>> ALLEYWAYS.
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CAN'T GET MORE BOSTON THAN
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ALLEYWAYS.
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>> LaFonda: YES.
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IN THE GREAT TRADITION OF NOT
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PLACING BUILDINGS RIGHT NEXT TO
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EACH OTHER, BOSTON IS THE
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LEADER.
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AND IT IS A RICH HISTORY.
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THE MASSACHUSETTS INDIANS
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CONSIDERED THE SPACE BETWEEN TWO
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STRUCTURES SACRED.
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THEY BELIEVED THE SPIRIT COULD
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SOAR TO GREAT HEIGHTS WHILE NOT
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BEING CONSTRICTED BY
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TOO-TIGHTISH WIDTHS.
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AND BOSTON HAS BEEN CASHING IN
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ON THIS RESOURCE EVER SINCE THE
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VERY FIRST STRUCTURE WAS BUILT
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NOT QUITE CLOSE ENOUGH TO ITS
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NEIGHBOR.
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MIKE SULLIVAN'S ALLEY, LOCATED
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IN BOSTON'S FINANCIAL DISTRICT,
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IS ONE OF THE CITY'S MOST
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FAMOUS, AND IT'S BEEN HIS
263
00:06:31,792 --> 00:06:32,962
FAMILY'S LIVELIHOOD FOR
264
00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:34,800
GENERATIONS.
265
00:06:34,995 --> 00:06:36,795
MIKE'S GREAT-GREAT GRANDFATHER,
266
00:06:36,797 --> 00:06:38,227
AN IRISH IMMIGRANT, WAS THE
267
00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:39,971
FIRST SULLIVAN TO HAVE A GO OF
268
00:06:39,967 --> 00:06:41,227
IT IN THE ALLEY TRADES.
269
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:42,944
SO, HOW DID HE COME TO OWN AN
270
00:06:42,936 --> 00:06:43,966
ALLEY IN THE FIRST PLACE?
271
00:06:43,971 --> 00:06:45,171
>> BOUGHT IT FROM A WICKED-DUMB
272
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:45,712
INDIAN.
273
00:06:45,706 --> 00:06:46,906
>> LaFonda: AND HOW MUCH DID IT
274
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:47,777
COST?
275
00:06:47,775 --> 00:06:49,135
>> $12 WORTH OF BEADS AND
276
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:49,882
TRINKETS.
277
00:06:49,877 --> 00:06:51,577
IT'S ALL HE HAD AT THE TIME.
278
00:06:51,579 --> 00:06:52,809
THE IRISH WERE SCURVY RICH AND
279
00:06:52,813 --> 00:06:53,553
TRINKET POOR.
280
00:06:53,547 --> 00:06:54,817
>> LaFonda: AND WHAT MAKES THIS
281
00:06:54,815 --> 00:06:56,245
ALLEY PARTICULARLY HISTORIC?
282
00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:57,819
>> EVER HEARD OF THE BOSTON
283
00:06:57,818 --> 00:06:59,518
MASSACRE?
284
00:06:59,520 --> 00:07:00,850
>> LaFonda: NO, BUT I GET IT.
285
00:07:00,854 --> 00:07:02,264
>> THE FIRST MAN KILLED IN THAT
286
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:03,855
SHOOTING, CRISPUS ATTUCKS, USED
287
00:07:03,857 --> 00:07:05,487
TO RUN A DICE GAME IN HERE.
288
00:07:05,493 --> 00:07:06,263
>> LaFonda: OH.
289
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:07,089
>> BLACK GUY.
290
00:07:07,094 --> 00:07:08,104
>> LaFonda: MIKE'S
291
00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:09,625
GREAT-GREAT-GRANDFATHER RAN
292
00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:11,100
ILLEGAL BURLESQUE SHOWS HERE IN
293
00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:12,898
THE 1870s.
294
00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:13,730
HIS SON, MIKE'S
295
00:07:13,734 --> 00:07:15,044
GREAT-GRANDFATHER, FOLLOWED HIM
296
00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:16,595
INTO SHOW BUSINESS.
297
00:07:16,804 --> 00:07:18,014
AS A CHILD ACTOR,
298
00:07:18,005 --> 00:07:19,765
FLANNERY SULLIVAN WAS A MEMBER
299
00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:21,613
OF "THE BACK BAY BOYS" -- EARLY
300
00:07:21,609 --> 00:07:23,009
SHORT FILMS IN WHICH THOSE
301
00:07:23,010 --> 00:07:25,610
LOVABLE BOSTON SCAMPS -- SULLY,
302
00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:27,923
SACK, BLACK SULLY, SHULI, AND
303
00:07:27,915 --> 00:07:29,215
THE CHINK -- ASSAULTED GIRLS
304
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:30,716
UNTIL AN ADVENTURE CAME THEIR
305
00:07:30,718 --> 00:07:31,888
WAY.
306
00:07:32,085 --> 00:07:33,185
BUT IT WASN'T UNTIL MIKE
307
00:07:33,186 --> 00:07:34,586
INHERITED THE ALLEY THAT HE
308
00:07:34,588 --> 00:07:35,788
FOUND A BUSINESS MODEL THAT
309
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:36,919
WOULD BRING RICHES TO THE
310
00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:39,264
SULLIVAN FAMILY -- RENTING IT TO
311
00:07:39,259 --> 00:07:40,829
FILM PRODUCTIONS.
312
00:07:40,828 --> 00:07:42,758
MIKE'S ALLEY HAS BEEN THE SITE
313
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,773
OF OVER 100 MASSACHUSETTS-BASED
314
00:07:44,765 --> 00:07:46,725
FILMS, INCLUDING LEGAL THRILLER
315
00:07:46,734 --> 00:07:48,844
"MASS APPEAL," HORROR MOVIE
316
00:07:48,836 --> 00:07:50,666
"MIDNIGHT MASS-ACRE,"
317
00:07:50,671 --> 00:07:53,071
PEDRO ALMODOVAR'S "MAS MASS,"
318
00:07:53,073 --> 00:07:54,813
AND "JURASSIC PARK."
319
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:55,978
BUSINESS WAS GOOD FOR
320
00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:57,646
MIKE SULLIVAN, AND THE FUTURE
321
00:07:57,645 --> 00:07:58,545
LOOKED BRIGHT.
322
00:07:58,546 --> 00:07:59,906
>> THE MASSACHUSETTS BUREAU OF
323
00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:00,983
TOURISM IS SHOOTING A
324
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:02,321
COMMERCIAL, AND THEY WANT TO
325
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:03,775
CENTER IT AROUND OUR BOSTON
326
00:08:03,784 --> 00:08:04,184
ALLEYS.
327
00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:07,154
SO, I'M THINKING WIN-WIN.
328
00:08:07,154 --> 00:08:08,594
>> LaFonda: WELL, I GET THE
329
00:08:08,589 --> 00:08:09,819
FIRST WIN -- THAT YOU CHARGE
330
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:11,663
THEM TO SHOOT HERE -- BUT WHAT
331
00:08:11,659 --> 00:08:12,929
ABOUT THE SECOND WIN?
332
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:14,156
WHAT IS THAT WIN?
333
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:15,301
UNLESS CHARGING THEM TO SHOOT
334
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:16,725
HERE IS THE SECOND WIN, IN WHICH
335
00:08:16,730 --> 00:08:17,970
CASE, I'M MORE CURIOUS ABOUT THE
336
00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:18,965
FIRST WIN.
337
00:08:18,966 --> 00:08:21,266
IN OTHER WORDS, WHAT IS THE WIN
338
00:08:21,268 --> 00:08:23,138
THAT I HAVE YET TO IDENTIFY?
339
00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:24,166
>> OH, OH, ALL RIGHT.
340
00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:24,711
OKAY.
341
00:08:24,705 --> 00:08:26,705
I'M SORRY.
342
00:08:26,707 --> 00:08:28,877
IT'S A WIN-WIN-WIN-WIN.
343
00:08:28,876 --> 00:08:29,636
>> LaFonda: OKAY.
344
00:08:29,643 --> 00:08:30,643
IN THAT CASE, WHAT IS THE
345
00:08:30,644 --> 00:08:31,814
SECOND, THE THIRD, AND THE
346
00:08:31,812 --> 00:08:32,312
FOURTH WIN?
347
00:08:32,312 --> 00:08:33,812
>> THE FIRST WIN IS THE FEE FOR
348
00:08:33,814 --> 00:08:35,684
FILMING, THE SECOND WIN IS THE
349
00:08:35,683 --> 00:08:37,623
ALLEY ITSELF, THE THIRD WIN ARE
350
00:08:37,618 --> 00:08:39,588
ALL THE TOURISTS FLOCKING TO THE
351
00:08:39,587 --> 00:08:41,347
CITY, AND THE FOURTH WIN ARE THE
352
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:44,094
TRINKETS, WHICH I'M ALREADY
353
00:08:44,091 --> 00:08:45,131
COUNTING AGAIN, BECAUSE I'M
354
00:08:45,125 --> 00:08:45,725
IRISH.
355
00:08:45,726 --> 00:08:47,086
>> LaFonda: BUT THEN THE BOMB
356
00:08:47,094 --> 00:08:48,734
DROPPED THAT WOULD EXPLODE AND
357
00:08:48,729 --> 00:08:49,929
TURN MIKE'S DREAM INTO A
358
00:08:49,930 --> 00:08:51,330
NIGHTMARE -- THE KIND WITH A
359
00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,701
NONDESCRIPT ALLEYWAY IN IT.
360
00:08:53,701 --> 00:08:54,871
TO SAVE MONEY, THEY WERE
361
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:55,968
SHOOTING MIKE'S BOSTON
362
00:08:55,969 --> 00:08:59,939
COMMERCIAL IN LOS ANGELES, AND
363
00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:01,680
MIKE'S FINANCIAL SECURITY
364
00:09:01,675 --> 00:09:03,305
QUICKLY WENT FROM WIN-WIN TO
365
00:09:03,310 --> 00:09:05,080
"THE OPPOSITE OF WIN"-"THE
366
00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:06,978
OPPOSITE OF WIN."
367
00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:08,680
THAT'S BECAUSE HOLLYWOOD
368
00:09:08,682 --> 00:09:10,082
PRODUCERS LIKE BRAM STRUNK
369
00:09:10,083 --> 00:09:11,323
STARTED FILMING ALL OF THEIR
370
00:09:11,318 --> 00:09:12,618
BOSTON-THEMED MOVIES IN
371
00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:14,290
LOS ANGELES ALLEYS.
372
00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:16,288
STRUNK FIRST DREW CONTROVERSY
373
00:09:16,289 --> 00:09:17,959
WITH THE DECISION TO SHOOT
374
00:09:17,958 --> 00:09:19,628
"LUMPY MASS," THE STORY OF
375
00:09:19,627 --> 00:09:21,087
BABE RUTH'S STRUGGLES WITH
376
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:22,934
BREAST CANCER, IN LOS ANGELES.
377
00:09:22,930 --> 00:09:24,700
MANY HAVE SAID THAT YOU DON'T
378
00:09:24,698 --> 00:09:26,298
CARE ABOUT AUTHENTICITY, ONLY
379
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:27,639
MONEY.
380
00:09:27,835 --> 00:09:29,065
>> WELL, I SPEND A LOT OF MONEY
381
00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,039
ON AUTHENTICITY, OKAY?
382
00:09:30,037 --> 00:09:31,137
THIS, UH, AUTHENTIC BOSTON
383
00:09:31,138 --> 00:09:33,268
GRAFFITI -- IT COST ME $600.
384
00:09:33,674 --> 00:09:35,084
>> LaFonda: YEAH, BUT YOU PUT
385
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,635
THAT THERE, NOT AN AUTHENTIC
386
00:09:36,644 --> 00:09:39,684
BOSTONIAN, LIKE SULLY OR SACK OR
387
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:41,820
BLACK SULLY OR SHULI OR THE
388
00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:42,145
CHINK.
389
00:09:42,149 --> 00:09:43,119
>> OKAY. ALL RIGHT.
390
00:09:43,116 --> 00:09:44,376
SO -- SO I CAN'T MAKE A MOVIE
391
00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:46,194
ABOUT BABE RUTH'S BOOB CANCER IN
392
00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:47,286
LOS ANGELES BECAUSE
393
00:09:47,287 --> 00:09:49,087
ABIGAIL ADAMS DIDN'T TAKE A DUMP
394
00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:49,659
HERE?
395
00:09:49,657 --> 00:09:50,257
WHAT, DO YOU THINK THAT
396
00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:51,217
ROBERT ZEMECKIS USED AN ACTUAL
397
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:52,064
TIME MACHINE TO SHOOT THE
398
00:09:52,059 --> 00:09:52,989
"BACK TO THE FUTURE" TRILOGY?
399
00:09:52,993 --> 00:09:53,793
>> LaFonda: WELL, I --
400
00:09:53,794 --> 00:09:54,964
>> NEWS FLASH -- HE DID, AND IT
401
00:09:54,962 --> 00:09:56,062
ALMOST BANKRUPTED THE STUDIO,
402
00:09:56,063 --> 00:09:56,363
OKAY?
403
00:09:56,363 --> 00:09:57,673
THAT'S WHY I DO THINGS ON THE
404
00:09:57,665 --> 00:09:58,725
CHEAP.
405
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:00,132
>> LaFonda: AND CHEAP PAYS, AS
406
00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:01,303
STRUNK PROVED WITH THE SUCCESS
407
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,701
OF HIS BOX-OFFICE BLOCKBUSTER,
408
00:10:02,703 --> 00:10:04,103
"HERE WE ARE IN BOSTON."
409
00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:06,044
>> WHAT THE KENNEDY IS GOING ON
410
00:10:06,039 --> 00:10:06,669
HERE?
411
00:10:06,674 --> 00:10:07,944
WE DON'T TOLERATE THAT KIND OF
412
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:08,941
CRAP HERE IN BOSTON!
413
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:09,912
BECAUSE THIS CITY IS
414
00:10:09,910 --> 00:10:10,680
WICKED-PISSA.
415
00:10:10,678 --> 00:10:12,008
I'M HUNGRY FOR SOME BAKED BEANS,
416
00:10:12,012 --> 00:10:13,212
AND I'M THIRSTY FOR A TONIC,
417
00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:14,683
WHICH IS WHAT WE CALL ANY KIND
418
00:10:14,682 --> 00:10:16,282
OF SODA HERE.
419
00:10:16,684 --> 00:10:17,924
>> BOSTON -- IT'S TOO COLD IN
420
00:10:17,918 --> 00:10:19,118
THE WINTER, TOO HUMID IN THE
421
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,389
SUMMER, AND TOO IRISH ALL YEAR
422
00:10:20,387 --> 00:10:21,347
'ROUND.
423
00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:22,964
>> LaFonda: AS FOR MIKE, HE'S
424
00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:24,356
FOUND A NEW BUSINESS -- GLUING
425
00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:26,057
BROKEN BOTTLES BACK TOGETHER AND
426
00:10:26,059 --> 00:10:27,259
RETURNING THEM FOR THEIR
427
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:28,130
DEPOSITS.
428
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:30,198
HE HOPES TO MAKE MANY TENS OF
429
00:10:30,197 --> 00:10:32,227
DOLLARS.
430
00:10:32,232 --> 00:10:34,232
COMING UP NEXT WEEK, IS THIS
431
00:10:34,234 --> 00:10:36,274
MUSTACHE IRONIC OR JUST A CRY
432
00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:37,739
FOR HELP?
433
00:10:37,738 --> 00:10:39,308
AND TUNE IN FOR A NEW SEGMENT,
434
00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:40,836
"WOULD YOU RATHER?" WITH
435
00:10:40,841 --> 00:10:41,471
DAN RATHER.
436
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:43,144
>> IF YOU HAD TO, WOULD YOU
437
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,983
RATHER LOSE YOUR PINKY FINGER OR
438
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:45,908
YOUR BIG TOE?
439
00:10:45,913 --> 00:10:47,753
WOULD YOU RATHER BE ABLE TO HEAR
440
00:10:47,748 --> 00:10:49,178
ONLY CONSONANTS OR VOWELS?
441
00:10:49,182 --> 00:10:51,052
WOULD YOU RATHER BE STRANDED ON
442
00:10:51,051 --> 00:10:52,851
A DESERT ISLAND WITH MEGAN FOX
443
00:10:52,853 --> 00:10:53,893
OR OLIVIA WILDE?
444
00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:55,457
WOULD YOU RATHER NEVER BE ABLE
445
00:10:55,455 --> 00:10:57,285
TO EAT CHOCOLATE OR EGGS?
446
00:10:57,290 --> 00:10:58,990
>> LaFonda: I'M LOUIS LaFONDA.
447
00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:00,662
GOOD NIGHT.
28197
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