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1
00:00:15,300 --> 00:00:17,000
Don't anyone leave this theater!
2
00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:19,300
The royal Romanoff Diamonds are missing!
3
00:00:29,700 --> 00:00:33,000
I am Sam Grunion,
Private Eye, at your service.
4
00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:36,000
Secrecy is my motto; I never tell.
5
00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:40,200
You will notice even my business card
has nothing on it.
6
00:00:41,700 --> 00:00:43,400
I am the same Sam Grunion who solved
7
00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:46,000
the international
uranium mining swindle.
8
00:00:46,300 --> 00:00:49,200
Scotland Yard was baffled,
the FBI was baffled,
9
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:52,100
They sent for me
and the case was solved immediately.
10
00:00:52,200 --> 00:00:53,200
I confessed.
11
00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:57,300
The Romanoff diamonds still missing
are valued at one million dollars.
12
00:00:57,700 --> 00:00:59,600
For eleven years I've trailed them.
13
00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:02,200
Through the Khyber Pass,
over the Pyrenees.
14
00:01:02,300 --> 00:01:06,000
Round the Cape of Good Hope
and into Gimbels basement.
15
00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:08,800
From Gimbels basement
the trail lead me to a group
16
00:01:08,900 --> 00:01:11,700
of struggling young actors
trying to put on a show.
17
00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:15,300
Did diamonds bring them luck? Money?
Hardly.
18
00:01:15,700 --> 00:01:18,300
Once again this
repeated the same pattern.
19
00:01:18,300 --> 00:01:22,300
A story of danger, cruelty,
black violence, mystery, murder!
20
00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:27,300
By the way, what do you
suppose the story was called?
21
00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:29,000
Love Happy!
22
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,900
That's Mike Johnson.
23
00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:03,700
Interesting dance, isn't it?
24
00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:06,200
He learned it fighting
off bill collectors.
25
00:03:09,300 --> 00:03:12,400
That's Maggie Philips,
she's in love with Mike.
26
00:03:12,500 --> 00:03:15,800
She's a dancer too. But it's hard
to tell when she's sitting down.
27
00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:23,000
This is Maggie's
best friend, Bunny Dolan.
28
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:25,600
She invested her last
300 dollars in the show.
29
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,400
It looks like a cold winter ahead,
30
00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,900
so she's knitting herself
an electric blanket.
31
00:03:44,900 --> 00:03:46,900
These love-happy kids
who were struggling
32
00:03:46,900 --> 00:03:49,000
for success had two things in common.
33
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:52,000
They were under-financed,
and under-nourished.
34
00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:54,600
Today they had already missed breakfast
35
00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:58,000
and their hopes for lunch
are pinned on one man.
36
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:00,800
Harpo, the strolling delicatessen.
37
00:04:00,900 --> 00:04:03,200
Here he is...
shopping.
38
00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:06,200
Looks like a classy store, doesn't it?
39
00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:09,300
Well, on the front they
specialize in hot delicacies.
40
00:04:09,300 --> 00:04:13,100
But in the back they
specialize in hot diamonds.
41
00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:25,900
Bless you, my man, bless you.
42
00:04:36,300 --> 00:04:37,800
Thank you very much.
43
00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:49,700
Quiet, little darling.
44
00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:16,900
Madame Egelichi, you are just in time.
The sardines have arrived.
45
00:05:17,300 --> 00:05:18,200
Relax,
46
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:20,900
and wipe that smirk off your face.
There are policemen around.
47
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:21,800
Yes, ma'am.
48
00:05:21,900 --> 00:05:24,600
- We shall wait in your office.
- Yes, ma'am.
49
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:34,600
Thank you.
50
00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:15,100
That's alright, just leave them there.
51
00:06:16,500 --> 00:06:20,300
- Will you sign here.
- Thank you, boys, thank you.
52
00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:32,200
At last. At last.
53
00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:36,200
You little darling, you're here.
54
00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:14,200
- Is the paraffin jelly in yet?
- Arriving Wednesday, on the Queen Mary.
55
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:18,500
- I have it. I have it!
- Quiet, Lefty.
56
00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:19,700
It's in the third crate
marked on the bottom...
57
00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:21,200
I said, quiet!
58
00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:27,600
I want to enjoy this moment.
59
00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:30,800
I have gone through a great deal.
60
00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:34,100
How many commissars
did I marry, Alphonse?
61
00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:35,800
Five, Madame Egelichi.
62
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,100
There were three more, were there not?
63
00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:39,600
Yes, the Grand Duke
and the two Ambassadors.
64
00:08:42,100 --> 00:08:45,000
Eight weddings in three months...
65
00:08:45,300 --> 00:08:48,900
before I could track down
the royal Romanoff necklace...
66
00:08:49,300 --> 00:08:52,900
and its trail from
bridegroom to bridegroom.
67
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:57,400
And no more,
the jewels are finally in my possession.
68
00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:01,500
If you please, Lefty.
69
00:09:04,300 --> 00:09:07,100
The Royal Romanoff necklace!
70
00:09:08,100 --> 00:09:12,000
One million dollars in
matchless diamonds!
71
00:09:14,100 --> 00:09:17,600
I have out-done even myself.
72
00:09:22,700 --> 00:09:24,100
There is something wrong, Lefty.
73
00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:26,200
Wrong?
Oh no, impossible.
74
00:09:26,300 --> 00:09:27,700
This is not the right can!
75
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:29,300
I beg to differ Madame,
it is the right one.
76
00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:30,800
Where is the can with
the Maltese cross on it?
77
00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:32,300
You've got it, your holding it!
78
00:09:32,300 --> 00:09:34,500
This can has no Maltese cross
on the top or on the bottom of it.
79
00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:36,300
It can't be!
80
00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:39,800
The Maltese cross was on it. I saw it,
I kissed it! It must have rubbed off.
81
00:09:39,900 --> 00:09:42,500
It was put on with
special adhesive paint.
82
00:09:42,900 --> 00:09:45,500
A generation of rubbing
could not have removed it.
83
00:09:46,100 --> 00:09:49,600
Mr. Throckmorton?
May I present the Zoto brothers.
84
00:09:50,100 --> 00:09:52,700
Their specialty is taking care
of people I do not like!
85
00:09:52,700 --> 00:09:56,200
Oh, no, no, let me open it Madame.
The diamonds are in here.
86
00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:13,800
Those hardly look like the
Royal Romanoff diamonds, Lefty!
87
00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:17,500
You may proceed, gentlemen.
88
00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:37,400
Eight marriages, wasted.
The other leg, Hannibal.
89
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:47,700
I'm afraid you have to stop.
I cannot concentrate.
90
00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:49,300
You're wasting your time gentlemen.
91
00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:53,000
Mr. Throckmorton is too feeble
a character to try to deceive me.
92
00:10:53,300 --> 00:10:54,700
Revive him.
93
00:11:02,300 --> 00:11:05,800
I can't understand it.
I can't understand.
94
00:11:06,300 --> 00:11:08,100
- I can't understand it.
- Quiet!
95
00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:11,100
Who was present when you found
the tin with the Maltese cross?
96
00:11:11,100 --> 00:11:14,300
Oh no one, not a sole. The door
was locked. I put it in my pocket I...
97
00:11:14,900 --> 00:11:18,900
Wait! Yes, there was someone.
Strange looking creature.
98
00:11:19,100 --> 00:11:20,800
Looked more like a
tramp than a truck man.
99
00:11:28,300 --> 00:11:30,100
You will call the police.
100
00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:31,500
Inform them,
101
00:11:31,500 --> 00:11:35,000
that the bushy haired shoplifter has
been at work at Hurberts And Hurberts.
102
00:11:35,100 --> 00:11:36,500
Give them a full description.
103
00:11:37,100 --> 00:11:40,200
Offer a reward of $1,000
for his capture.
104
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:43,900
Have all the suspects brought
to my apartment, one at a time.
105
00:11:47,700 --> 00:11:49,300
Police head quarters, please.
106
00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:39,300
Hey kids, take five minutes.
107
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:45,700
- Excuse a-me, you Mike Johnson?
- What do you want?
108
00:12:45,900 --> 00:12:48,100
- I'm look-a for a job.
- Wrong number, I'm all cast.
109
00:12:48,300 --> 00:12:49,500
Hey just a minu.
110
00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:51,600
You're missing a big bet.
111
00:12:51,600 --> 00:12:54,400
Somebody told me you're
putting on a show with unknowns.
112
00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:57,000
You're hiring a-peoples has
never been a-heard of.
113
00:12:57,500 --> 00:13:01,300
Well I'm the most unknown and unheard of
actors whos-a never been on Broadway.
114
00:13:01,300 --> 00:13:03,600
- What's your name?
- Faustino the Great.
115
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:05,100
- You've never heard of me? Huh?
- No.
116
00:13:05,700 --> 00:13:06,800
What did I tell you?
117
00:13:06,900 --> 00:13:09,900
- What are you unknown for?
- I no like-a to bragg...
118
00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:12,600
...but the thing I'm-a most
unknown for is mind reading.
119
00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:14,300
I give you an demonstration..
120
00:13:15,900 --> 00:13:18,000
You're thinking of something...
121
00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:19,600
Right so far.
122
00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:24,700
You think of a nice, juicy steak
with-a french-a fried potatoes.
123
00:13:24,700 --> 00:13:25,700
The exit is over there.
124
00:13:25,700 --> 00:13:27,400
All right, you do not
want a mind reader?
125
00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:29,500
What else do you want,
maybe a you need a juggler?
126
00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:30,600
No juggler!
127
00:13:30,700 --> 00:13:33,200
How 'bout an usher?
I bring-a my own flash light.
128
00:13:34,300 --> 00:13:38,000
- Hello, Lyons.
-Mr. Lyons, so glad to see you.
129
00:13:38,100 --> 00:13:40,700
- You're looking wonderful.
- Yeah, you sure are.
130
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,800
Mr. Yorkman was supposed to be
here at ten o'clock. It's 11:30.
131
00:13:44,900 --> 00:13:46,700
Don't worry partner, he'll show.
132
00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:49,400
Don't tell me to don't worry,
and please don't call me partner.
133
00:13:49,700 --> 00:13:52,900
I'm removing all my
costumes and scenery, as of now.
134
00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:56,500
The man's mad! Pulling out of the
biggest Broadway smash since "Showboat".
135
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:58,100
Don't tell about smashes.
136
00:13:58,100 --> 00:14:00,600
Mr. Yorkman who's going to be here
don't write-a show, check?
137
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,000
- I told you exactly what he told me.
- Well, he ain't here, check?
138
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:05,700
OK, now we come to the next step.
139
00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:09,400
The situation is either
Mr. Yorkman or $1,100...
140
00:14:09,700 --> 00:14:12,700
...or I move the stuff off the stage.
As of now.
141
00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:16,800
- Hey, wait a minute.
- Excuse me, are you Mr. Lyons?
142
00:14:16,900 --> 00:14:19,000
- That's right.
- It's-a lucky I meet you!
143
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:21,900
You know I was just talking
to Max Yorkman in his office.
144
00:14:21,900 --> 00:14:23,300
Are you a friend of Mr. Yorkman?
145
00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:27,900
Friend? Max and I are just like-a that!
Two heads on the same neck!
146
00:14:28,100 --> 00:14:29,800
Well, I'm glad to meet you.
147
00:14:29,900 --> 00:14:32,400
You know Max said to me,
"Faustino you want a job"?
148
00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:36,800
Go over see Mike Johnson. I'm backing
that show, he'll give you a job.
149
00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:40,200
- That's what he said, Mr. Johnson.
- That's good enough for me.
150
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:42,600
He's backing the show you said?
151
00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:45,900
Use-a you common sense.
Would I be here if he wasn't?
152
00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:48,500
I've been trying to get Mr. Yorkman
on the phone to find out.
153
00:14:48,600 --> 00:14:52,300
Ah, you don't have to bother with-a
the Max no more. Just talk-a to me.
154
00:14:52,500 --> 00:14:55,600
Ok. Maybe I was a little
hasty about removing the stuff.
155
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:57,300
Ah, it's only natural.
156
00:14:57,400 --> 00:15:00,100
You can't trust a-nobody
in a-show business.
157
00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,000
Maybe he really knows Mr. Yorkman?
158
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:06,200
It's a buggy ride.
This whole show is a buggy ride.
159
00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:07,800
- Am-a I hired? Huh?
- Yes sir!
160
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:11,200
That's a-fine! Thanks!
How much-a you pay me?
161
00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:14,000
That kind of talk's
gonna get you nowhere.
162
00:15:14,100 --> 00:15:17,600
- Nobody in this show gets paid.
- Not till we open and click.
163
00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:21,700
Ah, that's alright. I just was-a
thinking out loud. I'm-a no ham.
164
00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:26,100
Ham. Ham!
165
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:28,900
Something has happened.
It's lunch time and he isn't here!
166
00:15:29,100 --> 00:15:30,300
- Who isn't here?
- Harpo.
167
00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:35,400
Hey, Jim! Have you seen any
funny faced tramps, with bushy hair?
168
00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:37,500
Yeah, there a $1,000 reward.
169
00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:45,200
Harpo! Everybody's been waiting.
You're late with the food.
170
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,300
Now we eat.
171
00:16:33,600 --> 00:16:36,300
Hello Harpo!
You got-a something for me?
172
00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:41,700
You want I should read your
mind again? Alright-a, start thinking.
173
00:16:42,500 --> 00:16:46,600
You think of the same thing you though
about a-yesterday. And-a the day before.
174
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,400
That's the only thought-a you've got.
Huh?
175
00:17:05,100 --> 00:17:06,300
You're in love.
176
00:17:06,900 --> 00:17:09,700
A beautiful girl is-a
gonna smile at you.
177
00:17:09,700 --> 00:17:13,700
That's-a the only thing-a you want,
this beautiful girl should smile at you.
178
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:17,000
Alright, stop thinking now.
What you got for me?
179
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:22,400
I no wanna sardines.
You promised me something special.
180
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:29,900
Ice cream.
Tootsie-fruitsie ice cream.
181
00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:47,900
A royal feast!
My Robin Hood has struck again.
182
00:18:52,700 --> 00:18:54,700
I'll have these tomorrow.
183
00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:01,100
Bunny Dolan, next number.
184
00:19:04,500 --> 00:19:05,700
Rehearsal!
185
00:19:09,300 --> 00:19:13,700
Gather 'round me my children.
186
00:19:14,100 --> 00:19:18,400
Lift up your curly blond heads.
187
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:23,200
'Cause Mommy's got
something to ask you.
188
00:19:23,500 --> 00:19:30,200
Before you crawl into
your nice warm beds.
189
00:19:30,700 --> 00:19:34,000
Momma want's to know,
who stole that jam?
190
00:19:34,100 --> 00:19:37,500
Who's been in here nice clean kitchen?
Who stole that jam?
191
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:40,600
Was it little Tom, or Sue, or Mable?
192
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:44,500
Who snuck it off the table?
Even ate the label.
193
00:19:44,500 --> 00:19:48,100
Momma want's to know,
who made this mess?
194
00:19:48,100 --> 00:19:51,500
Momma's gonna kick some teeth in
if you don't confess.
195
00:19:51,700 --> 00:19:55,000
Momma wasn't lookin',
while that stuff was tooken'.
196
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:59,600
Know you had better scram.
Who stole that jam?
197
00:19:59,700 --> 00:20:02,400
Momma's not the type
that get's excited.
198
00:20:02,700 --> 00:20:05,200
She's lugged those groceries
home with out a squawk.
199
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:08,700
But Momma's gotta
find that guilty party.
200
00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:12,000
One of you kids has to talk!
201
00:20:12,700 --> 00:20:16,100
Momma want's to know
who stole that jam.
202
00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:19,600
Who's been ripe with all those goodies
and her leg of lamb?
203
00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:22,600
Seems to me your acting kinda flustered.
204
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:26,600
Bet you ate that custard,
and topped it off with mustard.
205
00:20:26,700 --> 00:20:29,800
Momma want's to know,
she don't wanta' guess.
206
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:33,100
Momma's gonna kick some teeth in
if you don't confess.
207
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:37,100
You're that little fella
which sucked it off the shella
208
00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:40,300
I don't want that lollipop.
209
00:20:41,100 --> 00:20:43,900
Momma's gonna blow her top.
210
00:20:44,100 --> 00:20:54,000
You stole that jaaaammmmm.
211
00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:52,100
No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
212
00:21:52,100 --> 00:21:54,600
Thank you for your work officer, but
this creature is not the man. Good day.
213
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,200
- Yes sir.
- Better luck next time.
214
00:22:00,100 --> 00:22:02,300
The wrong one again. We'll
have to increase the award.
215
00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:04,300
Answer it.
216
00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:06,100
Oh, if I ever lay my
hands on that thief,
217
00:22:06,100 --> 00:22:08,200
I promise you he'll
regret he was ever born.
218
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:12,500
I picked him up on me beet,
219
00:22:12,500 --> 00:22:14,900
thought you might want to have a
look at him and see if he's your man.
220
00:22:14,900 --> 00:22:17,300
Bushy hair and funny face
the sergeant told me.
221
00:22:17,300 --> 00:22:20,500
Yes, yes. Excuse me officer.
Hang on to him I'll be back in a minute.
222
00:22:23,100 --> 00:22:24,400
- That's the one.
- Are you certain?
223
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,900
Absolutely, he's our man, I tell you.
What do we do?
224
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,200
So nice of you to take
this trouble, officer.
225
00:22:57,300 --> 00:22:58,200
No trouble at all, ma'am.
226
00:22:58,500 --> 00:23:00,000
Is this the fellow you're looking for?
227
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:03,200
No he's not, but there is a
superficial resemblance, nothing more.
228
00:23:03,300 --> 00:23:04,200
OK, beat it!
229
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:07,000
No, just a second.
Don't send him away like that.
230
00:23:07,100 --> 00:23:10,600
The poor man looks miserable,
and lost, and without a friend.
231
00:23:11,300 --> 00:23:14,900
And he looks so intelligent.
I would like to do something for him.
232
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:17,400
Would you mind leaving him here,
please officer?
233
00:23:17,500 --> 00:23:19,300
I'd be a little careful
if I were you ma'am.
234
00:23:19,300 --> 00:23:21,100
You can't trust characters like these.
235
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:25,500
Oh, but he looks so utterly harmless
and hungry. Please, officer.
236
00:23:25,500 --> 00:23:26,600
- Okay ma'am.
- Thank you.
237
00:23:26,700 --> 00:23:28,200
Uh, we'll be keeping up the search.
238
00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:31,100
Why you...
You crummy little worthless...
239
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:32,300
Mr. Throckmorton!
240
00:23:33,100 --> 00:23:34,600
I must ask you to leave.
241
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:50,700
She's giving him the whammy!
242
00:24:39,300 --> 00:24:41,400
I am Madame Egelichi.
243
00:24:42,900 --> 00:24:46,100
I've been looking for
you for a long time.
244
00:24:48,100 --> 00:24:51,200
Because I think you may
have something for me.
245
00:24:56,100 --> 00:24:59,300
Alphonse! Hannibal!
Search him.
246
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:46,000
Alphonse, Hannibal!
You will wait in the other room.
247
00:26:58,100 --> 00:27:01,800
I think we'll be more comfortable alone,
don't you?
248
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:05,800
I like you.
249
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:09,500
I like you very much.
250
00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:13,500
I don't want you to be
lonesome and miserable.
251
00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:17,300
I want to ask you a few questions.
252
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:20,700
A few personal questions.
253
00:27:21,100 --> 00:27:23,100
But you mustn't lie to me.
254
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:29,600
I do not like it when people lie to me.
255
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:34,600
I get offended.
256
00:27:40,300 --> 00:27:43,900
Alphonse, Hannibal!
This creature won't talk.
257
00:27:46,300 --> 00:27:49,600
- There are ways of making him talk.
- I give the orders here.
258
00:27:49,900 --> 00:27:51,500
- You little devil!
- Stop that!
259
00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:58,300
What did you do with the sardine cans?
Answer me.
260
00:27:58,800 --> 00:28:01,200
Oh! Take him away.
261
00:28:02,300 --> 00:28:04,000
Give him everything.
262
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:07,200
But she was doomed to failure.
263
00:28:07,200 --> 00:28:11,100
For right now the sardines are on
a table in Maggie's dressing room.
264
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:14,000
For three days Maggie
had eaten Harpo's presents.
265
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:17,200
Smoked chicken, can turkey, tuna fish.
266
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:21,100
If only she had developed a taste for
sardines the show would have been saved.
267
00:28:21,500 --> 00:28:24,200
Meanwhile the cast went
on with dress rehearsal.
268
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:26,300
Unaware of the troubles ahead.
269
00:28:27,100 --> 00:28:29,900
Alright kids, lets get set
for the Sadie Thompson number.
270
00:32:20,000 --> 00:32:23,600
That was fine, Maggie.
Now go change into your ballet costume.
271
00:32:24,700 --> 00:32:28,100
Meanwhile Madame Egelichi, wearing
the pants of the dreaded Catwoman,
272
00:32:28,100 --> 00:32:30,800
was desperately trying
to make Harpo talk.
273
00:32:32,300 --> 00:32:34,700
First came the Hungarian rope torture.
274
00:32:36,500 --> 00:32:39,600
Six hours Harpo sat
in a chair smoking rope.
275
00:33:01,700 --> 00:33:04,400
Then four hours on the hideous rack.
276
00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:07,100
Original from the
workshop of the fiendish
277
00:33:07,100 --> 00:33:09,900
Ferdinand Von Krakowich of Monte Carlo.
278
00:33:13,800 --> 00:33:16,300
Place your bets, place your bets!
279
00:33:21,100 --> 00:33:22,000
When Harpo wouldn't talk,
280
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:25,200
Madame Egelichi decided to
take things in her own hands.
281
00:33:25,500 --> 00:33:28,400
That meant only one thing,
her own specialty.
282
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:31,400
The insidious food and water torture.
283
00:34:03,500 --> 00:34:05,100
- Has he spoke yet?
- Not a word.
284
00:34:05,100 --> 00:34:06,100
- The water?
- Still dripping.
285
00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:07,200
- Has he slept?
- Not a wink.
286
00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:08,500
- Eaten?
- Not a bite.
287
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:12,200
Three days without breaking.
It's rather unusual.
288
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:16,600
After I've finished eating bring him in,
and we will give him the apple test.
289
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:22,500
You have refused to speak.
290
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:25,500
We shall keep on firing until you tell
me what I want to know
291
00:34:25,500 --> 00:34:28,000
about certain can of
Portuguese sardines.
292
00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:29,500
Fire!
293
00:34:38,500 --> 00:34:40,500
Put that apple back on your head!
294
00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:52,500
Nothing must happen to him.
295
00:34:52,500 --> 00:34:55,500
He's the only living soul who
can lead us to the sardine can.
296
00:34:58,700 --> 00:35:02,700
- The gun isn't loaded, Alphonse?
- No, Madame. It is empty.
297
00:35:07,300 --> 00:35:09,200
There were only four
bullets in it, weren't there?
298
00:35:09,200 --> 00:35:10,300
That's right Madame.
299
00:35:13,800 --> 00:35:15,500
Grab him, the gun is empty.
300
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:40,100
We've been fooled.
301
00:35:40,300 --> 00:35:41,900
- He can speak.
- I'll stop him.
302
00:35:41,900 --> 00:35:43,600
No, no.
Let him talk.
303
00:35:44,500 --> 00:35:45,500
I'll listen in.
304
00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:56,000
You! You gotta no heart!
They wanna sing, they wanna dance.
305
00:35:56,100 --> 00:35:59,100
But what-a you say? You say no.
You say stop-a the music!
306
00:35:59,900 --> 00:36:01,500
Who's you? Toscanini?
307
00:36:06,500 --> 00:36:07,200
Harpo!
308
00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:10,600
Some sort of code.
309
00:36:11,200 --> 00:36:14,300
Mr. Lyons, stop-a the noise.
Stop-a the moving. It's-a Harpo.
310
00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:15,900
Where is he?
311
00:36:16,100 --> 00:36:18,200
Ssssh, I'm-a reading his mind.
312
00:36:22,600 --> 00:36:26,100
Clear your head.
You talk-a too fast, clear your head.
313
00:36:45,900 --> 00:36:47,300
That's-a better.
314
00:36:52,300 --> 00:36:56,500
He's a-having a party.
Everybody is hitting him with apples.
315
00:36:57,400 --> 00:36:58,800
It's-a lots-a of fun, eh?
316
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:05,200
Hey, what-a you think?
A beautiful woman is in-a love with him.
317
00:37:05,300 --> 00:37:06,600
For sardines.
318
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:11,800
What?
You don't say!
319
00:37:12,100 --> 00:37:14,200
This-a beautiful woman
wants to marry him!
320
00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:19,000
How much-a money she's got?
321
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:23,900
Tell her to come to
the Windsor Theater.
322
00:37:23,900 --> 00:37:25,400
We've got-a lots of sardines here.
323
00:37:26,500 --> 00:37:29,800
Lefty!
They're at the Windsor Theater.
324
00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:32,500
He says she's-a rich-a woman.
325
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:35,500
Well stop-a thinking.
Listen-a to me, we're in a-trouble!
326
00:37:35,500 --> 00:37:37,700
You bring her to the theater
right away, in half an hour.
327
00:37:37,700 --> 00:37:39,800
Hurry up!
Quick, stop-a for nothing!
328
00:37:49,600 --> 00:37:51,400
Alphonse, Hannibal!
329
00:37:58,300 --> 00:38:01,100
Hey, everything is-a fine.
Harpo save-a the show.
330
00:38:01,100 --> 00:38:03,200
He's bringing his-a
bride with lotsa money.
331
00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:06,100
- I ain't falling for anymore stalls.
- It's a-no stall!
332
00:38:06,200 --> 00:38:08,200
It's-a love!
She's-a bringing the money!
333
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:10,500
Boys! Keep moving the stuff out.
334
00:38:11,100 --> 00:38:15,100
- Hey, are you a musish?
- Well, I used to play.
335
00:38:16,100 --> 00:38:17,700
I knew it the first-a minute
I looked on you.
336
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:21,900
I say to myself, this Mr. Lyons,
he's-a not-a tough like he looks.
337
00:38:22,400 --> 00:38:24,200
He's-a got-a something in-a side.
338
00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:29,200
Something-a comes-a from the heart.
What kind of music do you like?
339
00:38:30,500 --> 00:38:31,700
I like gypsy music.
340
00:38:31,700 --> 00:38:34,800
Gypsy music! That's-a magnifico!
I like-a gypsy music.
341
00:38:34,900 --> 00:38:37,300
Hey, stop-a the moving!
Stop-a the noise.
342
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:40,600
Everybody stop.
Mr. Lyons, he's a-gonna play! Here.
343
00:38:40,900 --> 00:38:44,600
- Uh, do you know "Play, gypsy, play"?
- No, I don't know that one.
344
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:47,200
All right, do you know uh,
"Gypsy Serenade"?
345
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:47,900
No.
346
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:49,300
What do you know?
347
00:38:49,600 --> 00:38:51,900
- I know "Gypsy Love Song".
- "Gypsy Love Song".
348
00:38:51,900 --> 00:38:53,000
Yeah but I only know the chorus.
349
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:55,600
That's alright.
I verse and you follow me.
350
00:38:55,700 --> 00:38:57,900
All right, you play the
verse and I'll noodle around.
351
00:38:58,000 --> 00:38:59,300
What do you mean by "noodling"?
352
00:38:59,700 --> 00:39:00,600
Like this...
353
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:04,800
That's good!
You noodle on that, I macaroni on this.
354
00:39:14,900 --> 00:39:16,300
Now look-a Mr. Lyons,
355
00:39:16,300 --> 00:39:20,600
I know you wanna make a good impression.
But-a please don't play better than me.
356
00:39:56,300 --> 00:39:58,400
Are we playing the same thing?
357
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:41,500
A-ha! One too much!
358
00:41:01,700 --> 00:41:06,400
That's very good. Now we try the chorus.
But the chorus we play Pianissimo.
359
00:41:06,600 --> 00:41:09,200
- You know what Pianissimo is?
- No.
360
00:41:09,600 --> 00:41:12,300
- How long you study music?
- 15 years.
361
00:41:12,300 --> 00:41:14,900
15. You know, two more years
and you could've been a plumber.
362
00:41:15,300 --> 00:41:17,400
All right, all right,
never mind the Pianissimo.
363
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:19,400
I-a gonna make
it-a very simple for you.
364
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:22,100
We play it Allegro Pizzicato.
365
00:41:22,400 --> 00:41:24,700
That's what-a you call 'em a
high class Carnegie Hall stuff.
366
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:27,000
You know Allegro Pizzicato?
367
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:30,200
- No.
- You know Jimmy Pizzicato?
368
00:41:30,600 --> 00:41:33,000
- No.
- None of the Pizzicatos huh.
369
00:41:33,300 --> 00:41:34,800
- No.
- What do you know?
370
00:41:35,100 --> 00:41:39,500
- Uh, I know Pistachio...
- Pistachio! We play it!
371
00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:41,900
2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7.
372
00:43:50,500 --> 00:43:53,000
Very good! Very good!
373
00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:58,500
Now we play one more chorus.
374
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:09,400
Well, boys and girls.
I've got a little sad news for you.
375
00:44:10,700 --> 00:44:14,200
Our show isn't opening.
We're closing tonight.
376
00:44:14,300 --> 00:44:15,800
Without a shot at Broadway.
377
00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:18,200
Mr. Lyons, a man of small faith,
378
00:44:18,700 --> 00:44:21,900
is removing the scenery
and costumes from the production.
379
00:44:22,100 --> 00:44:22,800
Uh, Mr. Johnson,
380
00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:26,500
uh may I suggest that we do what all
actors have always done
381
00:44:26,500 --> 00:44:29,200
since before the days of thespians
and William Shakespeare.
382
00:44:29,200 --> 00:44:32,500
Perform without scenery,
or costumes, or salary!
383
00:44:36,700 --> 00:44:39,400
Sorry, I can't go on
with that kind of a show.
384
00:44:39,700 --> 00:44:42,500
Curtain's down, school's out.
385
00:44:43,200 --> 00:44:45,000
Better luck next time.
386
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:51,000
I'm sorry Mr. Johnson, but
Mr. Lyons said to take everything.
387
00:44:51,400 --> 00:44:52,400
Uh-huh.
388
00:44:57,200 --> 00:44:58,800
Well, go ahead, say it.
389
00:44:59,500 --> 00:45:01,100
I wasn't going to say anything.
390
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:04,300
You don't have to put it to words baby,
it's sticking out of your eyes.
391
00:45:04,300 --> 00:45:06,300
I'm yellow, no guts.
392
00:45:06,500 --> 00:45:08,500
Not at all, Mike,
you're just what you are.
393
00:45:08,500 --> 00:45:09,300
And what's that?
394
00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:12,600
A very nice, sweet, sensitive young man,
who does not belong in show business.
395
00:45:12,700 --> 00:45:16,700
You'd look stunning in an apron,
surrounded by nice, yellow oranges.
396
00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:22,900
- Here, have some sardines.
- I don't want any sardines.
397
00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:26,400
I'm not throwing a bare turkey
on the stage. I'm quitting, Maggie.
398
00:45:26,500 --> 00:45:28,900
And don't stand waving a flag,
and telling me the show must go on.
399
00:45:29,100 --> 00:45:32,200
- So relax, it's over.
- No, it isn't over!
400
00:45:32,400 --> 00:45:35,500
We're going to open without
scenery, without costumes.
401
00:45:35,500 --> 00:45:37,300
Just with talented and people.
402
00:45:37,600 --> 00:45:39,600
We're going to open and knock 'em dead!
403
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:40,400
Hallelujah!
404
00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:42,500
Come on, lets get out of here. We'll
get something to eat and celebrate!
405
00:45:42,700 --> 00:45:44,900
- What's there to celebrate?
- Today's your birthday.
406
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:46,800
Don't change the subject.
Listen Mike,
407
00:45:46,900 --> 00:45:49,100
we've got a good show here.
If you only try...
408
00:45:49,100 --> 00:45:50,600
What do you think life is, a fairy tale?
409
00:45:50,900 --> 00:45:53,100
Yes. It is.
410
00:45:53,800 --> 00:45:56,600
Fairy tales!
Sardines!
411
00:46:03,900 --> 00:46:04,800
What do you want?
412
00:46:10,500 --> 00:46:13,100
Could you tell me please,
where I can find Mr. Michael Johnson?
413
00:46:13,400 --> 00:46:16,000
You're speaking to the
gentleman in person.
414
00:46:16,100 --> 00:46:18,600
Oh, how wonderful,
you are really Mr. Johnson?
415
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:21,800
- What can I do for you?
- Oh, Mr. Johnson, so much!
416
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:25,500
- You mean in the show?
- You have a place for me, I'm sure.
417
00:46:25,900 --> 00:46:26,900
Too bad, Miss uh...
418
00:46:26,900 --> 00:46:28,900
- I am Madame Egelichi.
- Madame Egelichi.
419
00:46:28,900 --> 00:46:31,100
Mr. Johnson,
you must have a place for me.
420
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:32,100
Not any more.
421
00:46:32,100 --> 00:46:34,600
- But why?
- Because of a bankroll...
422
00:46:34,600 --> 00:46:35,600
...we haven't got.
423
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:39,000
What I'm trying to say Madam,
with out breaking into unmanly tears,
424
00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:42,900
...is that we're folding our show.
Calling it a day.
425
00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:45,100
Better luck next time, Madame Egelichi.
426
00:46:45,900 --> 00:46:48,100
Uh, You mean to say the
show is not going to open
427
00:46:48,100 --> 00:46:49,500
and the actors are going away?
428
00:46:50,500 --> 00:46:53,200
Oh no that...
How much money do you need, Mr. Johnson?
429
00:46:53,400 --> 00:46:57,000
- A loan from Congress would help.
- Mr. Johnson, I am serious.
430
00:46:57,100 --> 00:46:59,800
- I will supply the money.
- This is over my head Mike.
431
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:01,700
What's going on?
432
00:47:02,000 --> 00:47:04,700
It's simple.
Didn't you say life was a fairy tale?
433
00:47:04,900 --> 00:47:07,200
Here's our fairy godmother, with a wand!
434
00:47:08,500 --> 00:47:09,800
And what a wand.
435
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:13,000
Madame Egelichi, I need 11 hundred
dollars to raise the curtain.
436
00:47:13,300 --> 00:47:14,500
You're not kidding, are you?
437
00:47:14,800 --> 00:47:16,700
Shall we go to your office, Mr. Johnson?
438
00:47:17,300 --> 00:47:18,100
Lets go!
439
00:47:18,300 --> 00:47:21,200
You are going to make me so happy.
So happy.
440
00:47:47,600 --> 00:47:50,600
He's taking a long time
for a business deal.
441
00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:51,600
He'll be back.
442
00:47:51,600 --> 00:47:56,000
- Oh don't be a fool, lets go!
- Sorry Bunny, I promised.
443
00:48:01,300 --> 00:48:03,600
I told you to never eat
your dinner in this room!
444
00:48:07,200 --> 00:48:08,300
Cheer up honey.
445
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:11,300
Maybe he's breaking your heart to
make a better actress out of you.
446
00:48:31,900 --> 00:48:35,000
Well baby, we're opening! Lyons is
bringing back the scenery and costumes.
447
00:48:35,400 --> 00:48:36,100
That's wonderful.
448
00:48:36,100 --> 00:48:37,300
Yeah, she was really wonderful.
449
00:48:37,300 --> 00:48:39,700
She is mad about the theater
and she liked all my ideas.
450
00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:41,200
She's a real show woman.
451
00:48:41,400 --> 00:48:43,000
You can tell me all about it at dinner.
452
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:44,400
Oh, I almost forgot.
453
00:48:44,600 --> 00:48:46,500
You'd better struggle
without me tonight.
454
00:48:46,600 --> 00:48:50,100
Rita and I still have a lot to discuss
and I promised her that I would...
455
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:54,100
...but baby, I know it's your
birthday but this is important.
456
00:48:54,200 --> 00:48:57,000
Now be a trooper, cheer up!
Everything looks wonderful.
457
00:48:57,700 --> 00:49:00,200
It would look better if you'd
wiped the rouge of your mouth!
458
00:49:00,600 --> 00:49:02,100
Oh, don't get any ideas, Maggy.
459
00:49:02,100 --> 00:49:04,800
I was so excited when I saw the
money I had to kiss somebody.
460
00:49:05,400 --> 00:49:07,400
I gotta run, see you tomorrow.
461
00:49:08,500 --> 00:49:10,300
Happy birthday!
462
00:49:25,300 --> 00:49:27,700
- Do you want all these cans open Madam?
- Yes.
463
00:49:27,700 --> 00:49:30,000
But these open cans may attract
attention. What shall I do with them?
464
00:49:30,100 --> 00:49:31,900
- Put them in the alley.
- Alley, done!
465
00:49:38,500 --> 00:49:40,800
- You like-a sardines?
- Yes.
466
00:49:41,100 --> 00:49:43,800
- Why, have you got any?
- No, but I gotta something better.
467
00:49:44,300 --> 00:49:47,200
I gotta somethings a-worth
a million dollars to you.
468
00:49:47,200 --> 00:49:48,500
Really?
What is it?
469
00:49:48,600 --> 00:49:49,600
Love!
470
00:49:49,900 --> 00:49:51,700
It come to me like a flash!
471
00:49:51,900 --> 00:49:53,400
The first a-minute I see you.
472
00:49:53,400 --> 00:49:55,500
It's a-what-you-call-'em
love at-a first look!
473
00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:58,500
It's-a kind of love that's-a
never going to die.
474
00:49:58,600 --> 00:50:00,000
Uh, would you do something for me?
475
00:50:00,000 --> 00:50:02,300
Anything!
I climb-a the highest mountain!
476
00:50:02,400 --> 00:50:04,100
Down and up, up and-a down!
477
00:50:04,100 --> 00:50:07,000
I put-a my arm into the
fire. Up-a to here, for you!
478
00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:08,900
Uh, go and uh...
479
00:50:08,900 --> 00:50:11,800
...get me all the sardine cans
you can find in this theater.
480
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:14,600
Sardines? Ha! That's-a nothing!
481
00:50:15,200 --> 00:50:18,300
I'm gonna cover you with-a sardines!
482
00:50:18,600 --> 00:50:22,400
That's how much I love you.
Watch-a my smoke!
483
00:51:30,200 --> 00:51:31,900
Darling!
484
00:51:35,100 --> 00:51:37,400
My favorite animal is cats.
I collect them.
485
00:51:37,700 --> 00:51:39,900
Darling.
Darling.
486
00:51:44,700 --> 00:51:47,900
Madame Egelichi, at last our
search is over. Here is the can.
487
00:51:49,000 --> 00:51:49,900
Where is the necklace?
488
00:51:49,900 --> 00:51:52,300
- In here.
- Really Throckmorton.
489
00:51:52,300 --> 00:51:53,000
I'm sure of it.
490
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:55,300
He was eating sardines
and swallowed the necklace.
491
00:51:55,400 --> 00:51:57,700
- Oh but that's impossible!
- I'll have him examine at once.
492
00:52:01,500 --> 00:52:04,700
I no get-a you sardines.
I gotta you something better!
493
00:52:04,800 --> 00:52:06,600
- What?
- Anchovies!
494
00:52:07,100 --> 00:52:08,900
I have no use for them.
495
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:11,500
Maybe you like kippered herring?
Smelts?
496
00:52:11,500 --> 00:52:14,800
A smoked pike bit?
I get you any kind of-a fish you like.
497
00:52:14,900 --> 00:52:16,400
I love you!
498
00:52:49,900 --> 00:52:51,000
Go away!
499
00:52:57,200 --> 00:53:01,000
Go away! I'm sure your
new partner is more important than I am.
500
00:53:02,200 --> 00:53:03,900
Oh Harpo, I thought it was...
501
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:18,800
This is where you live, isn't it Harpo?
502
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:24,300
It must be wonderful to
be like you, Harpo.
503
00:53:26,000 --> 00:53:30,600
You live alone.
That is, you don't need other people.
504
00:53:31,300 --> 00:53:35,200
You don't depend on them.
Never get hurt.
505
00:54:15,100 --> 00:54:18,400
Oh Harpo, you're wonderful.
506
00:54:20,900 --> 00:54:25,200
Harpo, I've got an idea.
I've been a fool.
507
00:54:25,600 --> 00:54:29,700
Letting my heart stand in my way.
But it is not too late.
508
00:54:30,300 --> 00:54:35,200
He'll still give me the part.
Tomorrow morning. Mr. Hammerstein.
509
00:54:36,200 --> 00:54:40,700
Can you imagine me in a
Broadway production. A star!
510
00:54:40,900 --> 00:54:44,900
A real star!
And I'll work.
511
00:54:45,300 --> 00:54:47,300
No more Nickel Romeos for me.
512
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:50,300
I'll work, and keep
going, and get famous.
513
00:54:51,200 --> 00:54:52,900
And we will be rich together.
514
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:57,900
And Harpo you'll be with me,
because you've always loved me.
515
00:54:59,900 --> 00:55:01,500
I haven't anyone except you.
516
00:55:02,300 --> 00:55:05,200
And from now on you'll
be my manager, too.
517
00:55:05,600 --> 00:55:09,700
We'll be famous together! We'll scale
to heights of Broadway together!
518
00:55:11,000 --> 00:55:13,500
A star and her manager!
519
00:55:13,900 --> 00:55:15,500
We'll be important people, Harpo.
520
00:55:16,100 --> 00:55:19,300
You'll be the most influential
manager on the Great White Way.
521
00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:22,400
You'll have a whole suite of offices.
522
00:55:22,600 --> 00:55:25,500
And a great big shining mahogany desk.
523
00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:29,200
You'll be just as famous as me, Harpo.
524
00:55:30,100 --> 00:55:31,800
Everyone will come to your office.
525
00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:33,400
And call you on the phone.
526
00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:36,100
All the great stars, and
writers and producers...
527
00:55:36,600 --> 00:55:37,900
...they'll beg you to help them.
528
00:55:38,600 --> 00:55:41,100
And you'll audition all the
great singers and dancers.
529
00:55:41,500 --> 00:55:45,100
They'll will want advice,
about new plays.
530
00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:48,700
Begging to work in your productions.
Our productions.
531
00:55:48,800 --> 00:55:52,100
You'll be rich and important, Harpo.
You and I, both.
532
00:55:52,300 --> 00:55:55,500
We'll have everything
we've ever dreamed of. Everything!
533
00:56:10,200 --> 00:56:11,300
Sorry, Harpo.
534
00:56:11,800 --> 00:56:13,800
I'm afraid everything isn't very much,
535
00:56:13,800 --> 00:56:16,300
without that rotten,
horrible Mike Johnson.
536
00:56:17,500 --> 00:56:19,300
And on my birthday, too.
537
00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:22,500
He had to do it on my birthday.
538
00:56:24,300 --> 00:56:26,100
He said he knew it was.
539
00:56:26,700 --> 00:56:30,700
Oh I hope I never...
never have another birth...
540
00:58:22,200 --> 00:58:23,700
Oh, Harpo.
541
00:58:25,800 --> 00:58:28,400
What would I do without you?
542
00:58:29,500 --> 00:58:33,200
You've made this the
nicest birthday I've ever had.
543
01:01:39,800 --> 01:01:41,400
At last the show was opening.
544
01:01:42,500 --> 01:01:45,500
When Mackinaw, my faithful operator,
reported that Madame Egelichi
545
01:01:45,500 --> 01:01:48,900
had put money on the show,
I knew the crises was at hand.
546
01:01:49,700 --> 01:01:52,800
Now I was close to what
I had been trailing all these years...
547
01:01:52,800 --> 01:01:55,700
Madame Egelichi... I mean the diamonds.
548
01:01:56,800 --> 01:02:00,500
Immediately, I started for the theater.
Incognito of course.
549
01:02:00,700 --> 01:02:03,400
Mackinaw, you now have
a full account of the case,
550
01:02:03,400 --> 01:02:06,300
and tonight at the opening of the play,
you may have the solution.
551
01:02:06,300 --> 01:02:09,800
For when the curtain rises, Madame
Egelichi will be in the front box,
552
01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:12,200
...and sitting next to her,
will be Count Bouillabaisse.
553
01:02:12,300 --> 01:02:14,100
But if you take away
the count's silk hat,
554
01:02:14,100 --> 01:02:16,000
his opera cloak, and
his full dress suit,...
555
01:02:16,000 --> 01:02:18,400
...you'll have me,
shivering in my underwear.
556
01:02:19,600 --> 01:02:20,800
Come on, Mackinow,
557
01:02:20,900 --> 01:02:23,700
We'll be just in time
to be fashionably late.
558
01:02:28,600 --> 01:02:30,500
- Good evening.
- I'm Ivan.
559
01:02:30,600 --> 01:02:33,300
Well, on fret about it, you can always
change it to Tom, Dick or Harry.
560
01:02:33,300 --> 01:02:34,900
They get around allot.
Come, Mackinaw.
561
01:02:37,000 --> 01:02:38,900
Hey, that's not my suit you're pulling.
562
01:02:39,000 --> 01:02:41,100
Give me the diamond necklace!
563
01:02:41,200 --> 01:02:43,700
We've only just met and
already he's asking me for things.
564
01:02:43,700 --> 01:02:45,100
I'm from the Romanoffs.
565
01:02:45,200 --> 01:02:48,900
To recover the diamonds we
payed you 100 thousand Zlotys.
566
01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:51,800
Zlotties! Did you ever try to
spend a Zloty in this country?
567
01:02:52,700 --> 01:02:56,100
The diamonds!
Or in one hour you die.
568
01:02:56,100 --> 01:02:59,400
Oh, yes Mackinaw. Allow me to introduce
you to the man who's going to kill me.
569
01:03:11,400 --> 01:03:12,900
At the sound of the next musical note
570
01:03:12,900 --> 01:03:15,700
the end of my life will be brought
to you by the Boulevard Sand Company.
571
01:03:16,700 --> 01:03:19,300
Is your watch running fast? Would you
like me to drop a little sand in it?
572
01:03:19,300 --> 01:03:21,800
A few more grains of sand
will fall and you will die.
573
01:03:23,200 --> 01:03:25,000
I think I'm ready.
574
01:03:31,500 --> 01:03:32,300
Come in!
575
01:03:45,200 --> 01:03:48,300
Is there anything I can do for you?
What a ridiculous statement.
576
01:03:48,800 --> 01:03:51,700
Mr. Grunion, I want you to help me.
577
01:03:51,700 --> 01:03:53,800
I have a little sand left.
What seems to be the trouble?
578
01:03:55,200 --> 01:03:58,000
- Some men are following me.
- Really?
579
01:03:58,400 --> 01:04:00,100
I can't understand why.
580
01:04:03,700 --> 01:04:06,500
- I advice you to leave.
- I take you down to the bus station.
581
01:04:06,500 --> 01:04:09,100
Oh, if I'm not back tonight,
go ahead without me.
582
01:04:13,900 --> 01:04:16,100
That's been the history
of all my romances.
583
01:04:43,500 --> 01:04:45,000
Curtain time, five minutes.
584
01:04:59,300 --> 01:05:02,300
- Alright, I'm a heel.
- That's not news.
585
01:05:02,500 --> 01:05:04,400
Could you love a heel
that's been repaired?
586
01:05:04,600 --> 01:05:07,700
I came back last night to get you,
ten minutes after you left.
587
01:05:08,100 --> 01:05:11,300
- You did?
- Ah huh, with a clean face.
588
01:05:12,700 --> 01:05:15,900
- What's all that?
- Harpo gave them to me.
589
01:05:16,100 --> 01:05:17,900
I thought it might improve the costume.
590
01:05:18,400 --> 01:05:20,200
No. Too phony.
591
01:05:21,500 --> 01:05:24,300
Tomorrow, if we're not
stoned to death by the mob...
592
01:05:25,100 --> 01:05:29,100
...I'll get you a real gem.
For the proper finger.
593
01:05:30,000 --> 01:05:31,600
Mike!
594
01:05:54,100 --> 01:05:55,900
Faustino! Get ready,
you're on in a few minutes!
595
01:05:55,900 --> 01:05:58,000
I'll be ready, I'll be ready.
596
01:06:07,500 --> 01:06:08,300
We want the diamonds!
597
01:06:08,300 --> 01:06:09,800
- What diamonds!
- You were wearing them.
598
01:06:10,000 --> 01:06:11,300
- Oh, those!
- Where are they?
599
01:06:11,300 --> 01:06:12,700
I don't know!
I don't know!
600
01:06:12,700 --> 01:06:14,300
- She's not going to talk.
- She'll talk to Madame Egelichi.
601
01:06:14,300 --> 01:06:15,800
Or there will be murder!
602
01:06:27,200 --> 01:06:29,900
Maggie... What's going on here!
603
01:06:30,400 --> 01:06:31,800
Let go of her!
604
01:06:35,700 --> 01:06:37,700
Lets search the place
before we take her away.
605
01:06:43,300 --> 01:06:44,700
What do you want?
I should read your mind?
606
01:06:45,000 --> 01:06:47,800
I'm-a to busy now,
the show-a is gonna start.
607
01:06:48,200 --> 01:06:51,000
I'm telling you you're too excited,
I can't read-a your mind.
608
01:06:51,300 --> 01:06:53,700
All right, I read-a your mind.
What's on-a your mind?
609
01:06:55,100 --> 01:06:58,500
Yeah, at's a dame. All the time
you got a dame on-a your mind.
610
01:06:59,800 --> 01:07:02,300
Oh, it's-a no dame.
It's-a nice-a girl.
611
01:07:02,900 --> 01:07:04,600
Yeah, what about-a nice-a girl?
612
01:07:07,300 --> 01:07:10,100
That's-a what-a you call-a nice-a girl?
You're crazy!
613
01:07:10,200 --> 01:07:13,300
That's a dog!
A dog? What about a dog?
614
01:07:13,800 --> 01:07:14,600
A big dog?
615
01:07:15,200 --> 01:07:17,800
A police dog?
A big, big dog?
616
01:07:18,200 --> 01:07:20,900
A Saint Bernard dog?
Even bigger dog?
617
01:07:21,100 --> 01:07:21,900
Great Dane?
618
01:07:22,200 --> 01:07:24,400
A Great Dane?
What about a Great Dane?
619
01:07:25,000 --> 01:07:27,800
Great Dane got a dimple?
Great Dane got whiskers?
620
01:07:28,100 --> 01:07:29,000
That's-a my jaw!
621
01:07:29,100 --> 01:07:31,400
Great Dane - Jaw.
Great Dane - Jaw.
622
01:07:31,500 --> 01:07:33,400
Great Dane - Jaw
Great Dane - Jaw
623
01:07:33,600 --> 01:07:34,800
Great Dane - Jaw
Great Dane - Jaw
624
01:07:34,900 --> 01:07:35,900
Great danger!
625
01:07:37,300 --> 01:07:38,700
Who's a girl in great danger?
626
01:07:41,800 --> 01:07:44,400
I can't read-a your hand,
I can only read-a your mind.
627
01:07:46,900 --> 01:07:48,400
That's-a billy goat.
628
01:07:49,700 --> 01:07:52,300
That's-a Jolson.
Singing-a "Mammy" - Mammy goat!
629
01:07:52,800 --> 01:07:53,800
Mammy!
630
01:07:54,300 --> 01:07:55,000
Mammy?
631
01:07:55,200 --> 01:07:56,100
Mammy.
632
01:07:56,100 --> 01:07:57,400
Mammy
Ma...
633
01:07:59,900 --> 01:08:00,600
Ma...
634
01:08:01,200 --> 01:08:01,900
Ma?
635
01:08:02,200 --> 01:08:02,900
Ma?
636
01:08:03,300 --> 01:08:04,000
Ma?
637
01:08:04,100 --> 01:08:04,900
Ma - what?
638
01:08:05,800 --> 01:08:07,300
Ma - what?
Ma - what?
639
01:08:10,600 --> 01:08:13,000
You open the door?
With a key?
640
01:08:14,900 --> 01:08:15,900
Ma - key.
641
01:08:16,700 --> 01:08:18,700
Ma - key.
Ma - key.
642
01:08:18,800 --> 01:08:20,300
Ma - key.
Ma - key.
643
01:08:20,500 --> 01:08:23,700
Ma - k... Maggie!
Oh, Maggie is in-a great danger.
644
01:08:23,800 --> 01:08:27,700
Oh, smart, eh?
Oh ho, catch on-a quick.
645
01:08:28,000 --> 01:08:30,800
Maggie's in-a great danger.
Who's after Maggie?
646
01:08:33,000 --> 01:08:36,100
That's a bird. A seagull?
A bigger bird?
647
01:08:36,200 --> 01:08:39,200
A turkey bird?
A big, big bird? A stool pigeon?
648
01:08:41,600 --> 01:08:44,100
That's-a Yankee Doodle.
A Yankee Doodle bird?
649
01:08:45,400 --> 01:08:47,800
That's a the flag.
On top of the flag.
650
01:08:47,800 --> 01:08:50,200
Is a eagle!
An eagle, an eagle.
651
01:08:50,200 --> 01:08:54,000
What about the eagle?
Eagle a-scratch? Eagle a-tickle?
652
01:08:54,200 --> 01:08:56,600
Eagle a-got flees?
Eagle nervous?
653
01:08:56,900 --> 01:08:59,700
Ah, stop, you make-a me itchy!
Itchy?
654
01:08:59,800 --> 01:09:02,300
Eagle - itchy.
Eagle - itchy...
655
01:09:02,900 --> 01:09:05,500
Egelichi! Egelichi.
656
01:09:05,500 --> 01:09:08,300
Oh Egelichi.
What-a Egelichi gonna do to Maggie?
657
01:09:09,400 --> 01:09:11,500
It's a horse.
A horse run away with Maggie?
658
01:09:11,700 --> 01:09:14,100
A Horse a-fall down on Maggie?
659
01:09:14,800 --> 01:09:17,300
That's a hammer and nail.
No hammer?
660
01:09:17,400 --> 01:09:19,800
A nail! A big nail?
661
01:09:19,900 --> 01:09:22,300
A little nail. A little bitsy nail.
662
01:09:22,500 --> 01:09:25,300
Little, little
- tack, a tack!
663
01:09:26,100 --> 01:09:28,200
Wet tack? Wet tack?
664
01:09:28,600 --> 01:09:30,400
Wet tack? Wet tack?
665
01:09:30,600 --> 01:09:33,700
Horse - wet tack,
horse - wet tack...
666
01:09:33,700 --> 01:09:36,800
Horse - wet track, horse wet track.
Mudder!
667
01:09:36,800 --> 01:09:39,400
Mudder, mudder...
668
01:09:41,600 --> 01:09:47,500
A mudder, a mudder, a mudder...
669
01:09:47,800 --> 01:09:49,800
Murder! It's a murder!
670
01:09:49,900 --> 01:09:53,600
Egelichi's gonna murder Maggie!
Oh! Come on, lets go!
671
01:09:55,200 --> 01:09:57,600
Good luck, honey!
Thanks, Jim!
672
01:10:01,600 --> 01:10:03,200
...all about the diamonds
or we'll murder you!
673
01:10:03,300 --> 01:10:05,400
Hey, what-a diamonds?
Who's got-a diamonds?
674
01:10:05,500 --> 01:10:07,000
What a-we do?
What we gonna do?
675
01:10:07,000 --> 01:10:09,800
Alright girls, come on!
Get in line and look pretty.
676
01:10:10,000 --> 01:10:11,300
Now remember, this is opening night.
677
01:10:11,300 --> 01:10:14,100
Now lets hear those lines.
And put a little heart into it.
678
01:10:14,600 --> 01:10:17,000
Perfume from Hindustan!
679
01:10:17,000 --> 01:10:19,100
Oil from Arabia!
680
01:10:19,100 --> 01:10:21,300
Diamonds from Africa!
681
01:10:32,600 --> 01:10:34,200
Come on, we'll take her to the hotel.
682
01:10:34,200 --> 01:10:36,300
- But there's a show on!
- We're not interested.
683
01:10:36,300 --> 01:10:38,800
We'll keep her there until she
tells us where she hid the diamonds.
684
01:10:39,500 --> 01:10:43,000
Hey! Don't take her away, I confess!
I got-a the diamonds, I find them.
685
01:10:43,000 --> 01:10:45,300
- Where are they?
- Right here, but I no give 'em to you!
686
01:10:45,300 --> 01:10:48,300
- Here Harpo!
- Quickly, chase them!
687
01:10:51,400 --> 01:10:54,200
Harpo, this way!
688
01:10:56,100 --> 01:10:58,700
Help me hold the door!
689
01:10:59,400 --> 01:11:02,800
They got to keep chasing us. If they
find out we no got-a the real diamonds
690
01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:05,200
they're gonna stop the show,
kill Maggie.
691
01:11:05,200 --> 01:11:08,000
And I gotta get back in the theater.
Hurry, you go!
692
01:11:14,200 --> 01:11:15,200
That way!
693
01:11:41,500 --> 01:11:42,500
After you.
694
01:11:55,600 --> 01:11:56,600
Hurry up!
695
01:12:13,800 --> 01:12:15,900
Find him!
What's the matter with you two?
696
01:12:15,900 --> 01:12:18,600
He was right here! Where did he go?
697
01:12:21,500 --> 01:12:23,900
What are you doing there you idiots!
Why didn't you grab him.
698
01:12:41,300 --> 01:12:42,300
There he is!
699
01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:45,900
- That's where I saw him.
- You two are out of your head.
700
01:13:02,800 --> 01:13:03,800
He's heading up to the other roof.
701
01:15:44,600 --> 01:15:46,800
Beautiful, beautiful, go take your bow!
702
01:15:46,800 --> 01:15:50,100
I gotta no time. I got to give
them the diamonds. The real ones!
703
01:15:50,200 --> 01:15:51,700
- Who's got diamonds?
- Me, look!
704
01:15:51,700 --> 01:15:55,800
I save-a Harpo! I save-a the show!
I'm-a the hero, nobody else!
705
01:17:23,200 --> 01:17:25,900
Hey! Hey, I got them!
706
01:17:27,200 --> 01:17:29,800
Hey! Hey!
Leave Harpo alone!
707
01:17:29,800 --> 01:17:33,200
Here's the real diamonds.
Look! Look! Look!
708
01:17:35,700 --> 01:17:36,700
I got him.
709
01:18:09,300 --> 01:18:11,200
The odds were a thousand to one
that I wouldn't make it.
710
01:18:11,200 --> 01:18:14,000
But here I was, back on the trail.
711
01:18:17,000 --> 01:18:22,600
At the risk of death I fearlessly
scrutinized every possible hiding place.
712
01:18:46,100 --> 01:18:49,200
Ah, Madame Egelichi!
Don't you remember me?
713
01:18:49,600 --> 01:18:52,100
Yes, I do!
714
01:18:52,500 --> 01:18:55,800
- No, I mean before that.
- Grunion, I'm warning you.
715
01:18:56,200 --> 01:18:58,500
This time, I'm going
to get the diamonds,
716
01:18:58,500 --> 01:19:00,800
and nobody is going to stop me.
717
01:19:06,100 --> 01:19:08,400
Oh no, I'm not going to
follow you and get shot.
718
01:19:08,400 --> 01:19:10,900
If I was half-shot I'd follow you.
719
01:19:38,700 --> 01:19:40,600
I'll take those.
720
01:19:42,300 --> 01:19:44,800
- Give me those diamonds you fool!
- You want-a the diamonds?
721
01:19:44,800 --> 01:19:48,500
Sure, I give it to you.
Now, what you gonna give me?
722
01:19:49,100 --> 01:19:51,200
- That's not what I want.
- Where are they?
723
01:19:51,200 --> 01:19:52,800
- You got them.
- The real ones!
724
01:19:52,800 --> 01:19:55,500
Those are the real ones.
Harpo, he's-a gotta the fakes.
725
01:20:17,500 --> 01:20:18,700
He's out there!
726
01:20:20,200 --> 01:20:21,200
There he is again!
727
01:20:27,100 --> 01:20:29,000
- Where is he?
- He was standing right there!
728
01:20:29,000 --> 01:20:31,300
- That's what I saw!
- You two are idiots!
729
01:20:31,700 --> 01:20:33,300
- There he is!
- After him!
730
01:20:34,200 --> 01:20:35,000
Where is he?
731
01:20:37,500 --> 01:20:40,000
- Right there!
- Alphonse! Throw the rope!
732
01:20:45,200 --> 01:20:46,000
There he is!
733
01:20:47,900 --> 01:20:48,900
I'll get him.
734
01:21:33,600 --> 01:21:36,600
Good work, my man! I was just
about the enter the battle myself.
735
01:21:36,800 --> 01:21:39,200
From now on, I'm gonna take care of you.
736
01:21:39,400 --> 01:21:40,400
You've got the ax, of course?
737
01:21:52,200 --> 01:21:55,100
I'm in complete command
of the situation.
738
01:22:02,900 --> 01:22:05,300
I didn't see a thing,
all the window shades were down.
739
01:22:05,500 --> 01:22:06,600
Search him!
740
01:22:08,800 --> 01:22:10,600
Oh, no, I'm not gonna get into that.
741
01:22:12,600 --> 01:22:14,800
If this was a French picture
I could do it.
742
01:22:18,000 --> 01:22:19,300
I'll search him myself.
743
01:22:19,300 --> 01:22:21,500
No, the diamonds have
kept us apart to long.
744
01:22:21,700 --> 01:22:23,700
I'll tackle him single handed.
745
01:22:26,900 --> 01:22:29,800
I'd kill anyone who's
got those diamonds.
746
01:22:37,300 --> 01:22:38,600
Grunion, darling!
747
01:22:40,000 --> 01:22:41,900
Careful, you're singing my coat.
748
01:22:41,900 --> 01:22:45,700
I don't care about the diamonds.
All I really want is you.
749
01:22:46,500 --> 01:22:49,500
- So, you finally fell for me, eh?
- Yes.
750
01:22:49,600 --> 01:22:53,200
This is the sweetest moment
of my life. Come my darling!
751
01:22:53,300 --> 01:22:55,800
Goodbye old man,
it was nice knowing you.
752
01:22:57,800 --> 01:22:59,800
Please, you're tickling
my change pocket!
753
01:22:59,800 --> 01:23:03,600
Oh my darling, lets get away together
just you and I. What fun we'll have!
754
01:23:03,700 --> 01:23:06,200
We'll stop at the Riviera,
Monte Carlo, Rio de Janeiro...
755
01:23:06,200 --> 01:23:07,900
Yeah, but first we'll
stop at the unemployment
756
01:23:07,900 --> 01:23:09,700
insurance office to pick up my check.
757
01:23:23,200 --> 01:23:24,900
And that's how the long search ended.
758
01:23:25,300 --> 01:23:28,000
With the diamonds in the
pocket of a happy-go-lucky clown
759
01:23:28,000 --> 01:23:29,200
who disappeared with them.
760
01:23:29,700 --> 01:23:32,000
Never realizing their true value.
761
01:23:33,600 --> 01:23:35,300
Anyway that was six cases ago.
762
01:23:35,300 --> 01:23:38,100
Right now I'm hot on the trail
of the Calcutta cut-throats.
763
01:23:38,200 --> 01:23:41,200
And I've tracked the down
to Good Humor plant in Istanbul.
764
01:23:43,000 --> 01:23:44,500
Answer that, my man!
765
01:23:45,700 --> 01:23:47,300
I'm busy.
766
01:23:51,600 --> 01:23:52,900
Gin, eh?
767
01:23:53,000 --> 01:23:55,600
10, 30, 40, 47, 50, 60...
768
01:23:55,600 --> 01:23:57,000
Fine assistant...
769
01:23:57,700 --> 01:23:59,200
There goes-a my coat.
770
01:24:00,700 --> 01:24:01,600
Yes!
771
01:24:02,600 --> 01:24:05,300
Yes, dear.
Yes, I'll be home, dear.
772
01:24:05,500 --> 01:24:08,000
No, I wont be late, dear,
six o'clock, right on the dot.
773
01:24:08,100 --> 01:24:10,500
Yes, dear.
Goodbye, dear.
774
01:24:11,900 --> 01:24:13,200
My wife.
775
01:24:14,200 --> 01:24:17,100
Formerly, Madame Egelichi...
62210
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