Original subtitles

[♪♪♪]

Aw... you poor thing.

Yeah, I'm almost out of fries.

Not you.

I'm saying "Aw..." to this story I'm reading

about a little boy who was born deaf,

and they're trying to get him cochlear implants

if they can raise enough money.

They have a KickFundy campaign going.

What's Kicky Fundy?

It's not "Kicky Fundy."

It's "KickFundy."

Like that makes more sense.

It's a fundraising site.

People who are struggling explain what's going on,

and strangers contribute to their cause.

What?

Free money for complaining?

I could make a killing!

There are times when I'd pay

not to be able to hear.

[gasping]

That's an insensitive thing to say.

I just meant about Dad.

I'd be willing to pay to not hear him.

How much?

Well, everything isn't a joke, Brent.

Sometimes you can be too glib, and it can be a bit jerky.

No, I'm not-- I'm not being--

Look, I'm fully on board with this kid.

We should do something to contribute.

Maybe a fundraising event,

get a band...

Yeah!

We should get our old high school band

back together!

That is not at all what I was saying.

Get Thunderface back together?

Count me in!

No, no, we're not doing that.

Ah, typical Brent.

All glib, no go.

That's not--

Okay, fine, we'll do it.

We'll get Thunderface back together.

For one night only.

Yeah!

And then maybe a tour.

We should buy a bus.

I can say no to the tour and the bus, right?

♪ You think there's not a lot goin' on ♪

♪ Look closer, baby you're so wrong ♪

[♪♪♪]

Put your phone down for two minutes,

and get the video camera.

The phone is a camera, genius.

So, what am I supposed to be shooting?

Me.

I got some stuff to get off my chest

and onto Kicky Fundy for a pretty penny.

Those are like random words being dumped out of a bag.

What are you guys doing?

Squabbling?

What's the squabble topic?

I'm mad at him for wasting my time,

and he's mad at me for not being happy

that he's wasting my time.

Keep it up, and you're off the film.

Deal.

Film?

You're making a movie?

Let me help.

Your phone have a camera?

It's got three.

You're fired!

All right!

I wonder if we even remember how to play.

It's been a while.

I know.

We did some gigs in high school,

then that one gig at the bar a few years back,

then a nebulous amount of time went by,

and here we are.

I know I'm the newbie here,

but maybe we should update our sound.

We should go heavy. Heavy punk.

No, Electro House.

Like Daft Punk.

Should we just play

the theme to Punky Brewster?

Jeez, how old is that reference?

A nebulous amount of time.

Hello, Kicky Fundy.

"KickFundy."

I have a beef

about how seniors are treated

here in Dog River.

Our Seniors' Centre is more like a trash heap!

The chairs are hard.

The apples are soft.

The soup's too hot.

There are pieces missing in the puzzles!

Myrtle's hips squeak so loud

it makes my eye twitch.

So gimme some money.

There.

[cackles]

Do you think any of these dial-up ding-dongs

are gonna go for it?

Not if we leave in that last part.

Okay, looks like we're pretty much ready

to start practicing.

Gimme a second to tune my axe,

and then we'll see how bad we sound.

[feedback whining]

Hey, cool!

It's your old notebook

with all the songs you wrote back in high school.

Okay, give it here.

Relax, I just need to refresh my memory

on some of the lyrics.

No need. I'll prompt you if you forget.

Hand it over.

Hey...

I don't remember this song.

Is it a romantic ballad or something?

No, it's not, it's thrash metal, actually.

"That pretty twinkle in your eyes..."

Kinda romantic for thrash metal.

"I love the smell of your hair."

Ew, hair-sniffing is creepy.

"I should've told ya You're sweet as cream soda"?

Woof!

Detroit Barf City.

Okay, you've all had your laughs

and your barfs,

and we can move on now.

We should play this.

It could be the sound we're looking for.

No!

We're not playing that song,

and that's final.

[♪♪♪]

You think any of these dial-up ding-dongs

are gonna go for it?

I thought you were gonna cut that.

We need to re-do the whole thing.

It's just you complaining.

That's the whole Kicky Fundy business model.

No, it's not.

It's about emotion,

making human connection.

You need to pull the heartstrings.

Ah, I get ya.

Sap it up a bit, huh?

Turn on the waterworks.

[cackles]

We should shoot this

at the actual Seniors' Centre,

to capture the sights, and sounds, and smells.

Well, not the smells.

Thank God.

Hey, Brent.

How goes the band thing?

Just heading back to practice now.

We had a bit of a speed bump earlier,

but I'm sure we can smooth that out

and be ready for the fundraiser.

[starts playing a rock beat]

[joins in with thumping single-note bass]

♪ Your crispy crinkle fries ♪

♪ That pretty twinkle in your eyes-- ♪

Hey, whoa!

What the hell are you doing?

Your song.

It's really growing on me.

Yeah.

It's not so barfy when it's being sung.

I said we weren't doing that song.

I even said, "That's final,"

and then I stormed off angrily, in a huff!

Brent, did you write that song?

Yeah, it's a romantic ballad

he wrote back in high school.

Yes, well, a long time ago,

so let's forget that and get to work.

Ooh, did you have a secret high school crush?

Who was she?

Or is she?

[gasps] Does she still live here?

Sorry, can't hear you.

[strumming loudly]

[loud guitar strumming]

Come on, Brent.

Gimme a clue.

Who was your high school crush?

Okay, let's take a break.

I need a new guitar string.

But all your strings are--

[twanging and snapping]

That's five!

Aah!

[phone camera snaps]

Do any of you guys know who Brent's crush was?

No idea.

I only ever saw him get hot and bothered

over snacks.

Hey, if we're taking a break,

I'm gonna pop home for a minute.

Brent was probably just writing about some hottie

off a TV show,

like "I Dream of Jeannie"

or "Charlie's Angels"

or "Bikini Bake-Off."

Hmm, I don't recall "Bikini Bake-Off."

That's just my working title.

If I get a network to buy the pitch,

they may want to change the name.

Ah, I see.

You, uh...

you ever do any baking?

Yeah, but always in a one-piece.

[sighs] This thing with Brent...

I was just teasing him,

but if he gets this upset,

he must've had serious feelings for this girl.

Hmm... Mm-hmm.

This one-piece, is it tops or bottoms?

We're done here.

[♪♪♪]

The twilight years are upon these old, tired souls.

A lifetime of hard work and sacrifice behind them.

Haven't they earned a rest?

But here, there is no rest.

[snoring]

Well, that one is resting,

but most of them can't find any comfort.

Saggy old sofa,

stained with God knows what.

Dinner on a hard metal folding chair

that's just as likely to collapse

as it is to pinch their privates.

I can't imagine winding up in a place like this,

so I'm asking you to look in your heart.

Look in your soul.

Look over there...

Even their dog is old, forgotten, and unloved.

[dog whines]

That's the fifth time

you've cut away to that mangy dog.

Animals are a sure bet.

They make the audience feel.

Yeah, feel confused.

She hates it.

If you're happy with it,

and I don't have to do anything,

I think it's perfect.

Shall we upload it?

Oh, hell yeah.

And... there.

It's into the ether.

So, uh...

where does the money come out?

[♪♪♪]

Okay, look,

I apologize for being weird

about this song stuff.

Forgiven.

Okay, I worked up a set list,

and we'll do your romantic song in the five slot.

No!

Come on, we have to stick to our roots,

rock 'n' roll!

Those songs got us nowhere.

I think our glaringly limited talent

might've contributed to the nowhere.

All right! Let's get punk, you pukes!

What the hell?

If we're gonna do this, let's do this!

Death Before Disco! [toy squeaks]

Woof! [thumping bass notes]

Now hear this! [siren wailing]

D.J. PoPo in the house!

Everybody get down on the ground,

and put your hands up!

It's about to get legal up in here!

[electro beats pounding]

No, no, no!

We're not punk, we're not house,

we're Thunderface!

Thunderface forever!

Who's with me?

I need an aspirin.

[humming]

[singing] ♪ Your crispy crinkle fries ♪

♪ That pretty twinkle in your eyes-- ♪

The twinkle in my what?

Oh, nothing,

but since you asked me about that song...

let's talk about it.

It's Brent's song.

Like "Laura's Theme"?

No, your son, Brent.

In high school, he wrote a song

about a girl he had a crush on.

It was pretty serious, too, from what I hear.

Why didn't I know about this?

I could have given him a push,

married him off.

I'd be swimming in grandkids by now.

Who was the girl?

I don't know.

I sort of assumed you might know.

I never saw him with any girls.

He never seemed to have any interest.

Do you think Brent might be gay?

Hmm, I doubt it.

Did you ever ask him?

I never would've got a straight answer.

[chuckles]

"Straight."

I didn't even mean that as a joke.

I'm good.

Well, I know what you mean

about no straight answers.

He is a bit glib sometimes.

It's like he uses humour as a defense mechanism.

Maybe he's asexual.

More like "nay-sexual."

[chuckles tersely]

The glib thing, it might be hereditary.

[♪♪♪]

[Oscar]: Have you checked it?

Any money coming in to the Kicky Fundy kitty?

You might wanna look at this.

420 bucks!

And it's gaining momentum!

At this rate,

we could raise some significant cash.

You've done a real good thing here, Oscar.

Don't I know it!

Finding Brent's mystery crush

shouldn't be hard.

There were only 12 people in his grad class.

Wow, that is tiny.

Oh, look, there's Murray.

I always liked Murray.

I doubt it's him.

We can use the lyrics as clues.

"Your crispy crinkle fries,

that pretty twinkle in your eyes.

I love the smell of your hair,

trying not to stare.

I know I should've told ya,

You're as sweet as cream soda."

Well, that doesn't technically rhyme.

The point is, it's not Murray.

I don't know,

those are some twinkling eyes.

He's 17, and his hair's already thinning?

Plus he's a guy.

A mother can dream.

Hmm, what about her?

She has good hair.

Might smell nice.

Here she is with the hockey team.

Yikes.

The song mentions a beautiful smile.

That ain't it.

What about this husky girl with the wicked mullet?

That's Brent.

Oh,

and you wonder why he didn't date more?

Could it be someone from outside of school?

We're going on a deep dive.

To the attic!

[♪♪♪]

1,200 bucks.

All right...

[yelps]

[power window whirs]

I saw Oscar's video.

Is it true he's raising money

for the Seniors' Centre?

Yes, though, I don't know if I'd call it "Oscar's video."

I had a pretty big hand in shaping the narrative.

I'm an associate producer.

We're thinking about Sundance.

This is great!

The Seniors' Centre

desperately needs to be fixed up.

Oscar should form a committee.

That's a great idea.

Hop in, and we'll go talk to him.

[grunting with effort]

Ike wants to discuss what your plans are

for the fundraising money.

You're looking at it.

So, you bought that massage chair

for the Seniors' Centre?

[laughing]

Why the hell would I do that?

The KickyDummy dough is for me.

What?

But in our short independent film,

you said--

I said,

"I can't imagine myself in a place like that."

I'm gonna spend my twilight years here,

so I'll need some quality care.

Comfy chair, foot bath,

foot dryer, footie pajamas.

So you had a hand in producing

this cash-grab video?

Well, Associate Producer doesn't mean anything.

Vanity credit.

Oscar directed.

[♪♪♪]

Can we just play one song?

Please? One song?

I'm in.

Let's go.

1, 2... 1, 2, 3, 4--

Why can't that one song be the ballad?

Because I don't want us to play that song.

You're acting like a total diva!

Maybe we should start calling you Brentyonce.

Or Brentney Spears.

Brentstina Aguilera.

Jennifer Lo-Brent.

I'm not being a diva,

and Brentifer Lopez would've been better.

Point is, you're the one making this complicated.

We're playing for one night.

It's not like we're even a real band.

How dare you?!

Real bands practice

more than once a decade,

and they generally have a guitarist.

You're the guitarist!

Was the guitarist.

I quit.

You can't quit,

because...

I'm kicking you out of the band!

Well, you can't play any of my songs.

Or call yourselves Thunderface.

I came up with that.

No, we came up with that together.

Then you can keep half.

Thunder or Face.

Take your pick.

Obviously we want Face!

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

Wow, Hank, your garage is pretty cramped,

and, uh, I don't wanna say "rank," but...

Brent's garage is like Graceland

compared to this dump,

but, no, you had to go and kick him out

just because he quit.

We don't need Brent.

I can just hold the guitar

and make guitar sounds with my mouth.

[imitating guitar solo] Deedle-ee-oo!

Deedle-eedle-ooh-yow-yow!

Interesting,

but a better idea

would be to replace your mouth

with my synth.

[plays eerie voice tone]

Scratch that, we've gotta go punk.

It's not 1970, Wanda.

No one listens to music with instruments anymore.

What if we merged the sounds together?

We take the fun protestiness of punk

and the newness of electronic music.

We'll call it E-punk.

I don't hate the sound of that.

As long as--

You can wear your helmet,

and I'll wear my outfit,

and Hank...

has a truck.

Now we just need a new killer band name.

We got custody of "Face,"

the best part of the old name--

Lightning Face?

Tsunami Face!

Cloudy with a Chance of Face!

Maybe we should get off weather-related face ideas.

About Face?

Barf Face!

Face Barf!

Face Chunks!

I love it!

Face Chunks for life!

He seems excited about it.

Let's just play some music.

All right, Face Chunks on four!

No wait, Brent used to say "four."

I want 11.

A-one, a-two,

a-one, two, three, four, five, six, seven--

[♪♪♪]

Aw, is that Baby Brent?

So cute, little rascal, all covered in mud.

That's gravy.

Oh, and here was my knitting circle.

There's your Aunt Ruby,

and look,

here's Brent with Ruby at the cafe.

She was so sweet to him.

Crispy fries...

nice hair, twinkling eyes,

all of her teeth--

Oh, my God.

He had a schoolboy crush on my aunt.

Well, she was a great cook.

Can I have this photo?

Of course.

[heavy sigh]

Oh, you're sad that he's not gay, aren't you?

It would explain so much,

and Murray's a doctor now.

[playing groovy electro riff]

♪ Why-ai-ai! ♪

♪ A-why! A-why! ♪

[music stops]

Are you just saying "why" over and over again?

Yeah.

Brent took all the songs,

so I was just trying to let it flow.

And all you could come up with was "why"?

Why not?

I have an idea.

There's this algorithm on the Internet to write songs.

We could feed it the lyrics to a Top 40 electro song.

Ooh, do "TGIParty"!

Then we combine that with a '90s punk song.

How about "Drunk At Your Dad's House"?

Oh, I love that one.

The lyrics are so deep.

Okay, Hank, I texted you the lyrics.

Let's try it with a melody.

[playing high-speed electro with police sirens]

♪ T.G.I. your dad! T.G.I. your dad ! ♪

♪ I like to drink your dad! ♪

♪ Me and your dad! Me and your dad! ♪

♪ Why! Why! ♪

♪ Why-eeee... not! ♪

[song ends]

I added the last part.

Well, the whole thing sucked.

Ah, the algorithm just needs a few tweaks,

or Hank does.

Speaking of me,

I've been working on a song.

It's a ballad.

Goes a little something like this...

♪ Your rectangle eyes ♪

♪ Frame your round head ♪

♪ My lifelong friend ♪

♪ It's like you're dead ♪

Is he talking about Brent?

So, uh, what do you think?

I think we need Brent back. Badly.

[♪♪♪]

Hey there...

Hey.

You're looking... weird.

I'm being coy,

because I have a nugget of information,

but I'm holding back sharing it with you.

Yeah, I know what "coy" means.

I figured out who your crush is.

Oh.

Well, listen, when I wrote that--

Oh, don't be embarrassed.

I think it's adorable.

You do?

Yeah, so cute.

Teenage boy with a secret crush on my Aunt Ruby?

Yeah, I guess that would be sort of adorable.

She was a real dish.

Hubba hubba, pardon my French,

but, alas, I was 17,

she was a crusty old nag of 36--

Hey, I'm 36.

Oh, right.

What do you want?

You can't have Thunder. You already called Face.

Well, Face Chunks blows.

Blows chunks.

I'm sorry, Brent.

Can we get Thunderface back together?

I promise I won't mention the song

that won't be mentioned ever again.

You mean his love song

about my Aunt Ruby?

Say what?

Shut it, zip it, that's mentioning.

But--

Go practice being coy somewhere else.

I'm in.

[hard rock music thumping]

♪ --make a million dollars and-- ♪

[dragging out a big ending]

[song ends]

[crowd cheering]

All right, thanks for coming out, everybody,

and thanks for donating money

to help that Internet kid get his bionic ears.

I've got a couple of notes here

from Phil.

One is for Lanny.

Your truck is parked too close to a hydrant,

so move it or lose it.

The second

is that the whole hearing operation kid thing

was an Internet scam,

and it's been removed from KickFundy.

So... hmm.

Don't we all feel foolish.

I have an announcement too.

Lanny, your truck's been towed.

Also, Oscar has been raising money,

and with a strong arm of encouragement

from the D.R.P.D.,

he's donating all funds raised

to the Seniors' Centre!

Whoo-hoo! Awesome!

I've been robbed!

And my dad's been robbed, apparently.

Also, we'll be donating all the money we raised

for this "fake kid cyber fraud

what the hell is wrong with people" scam

to the Seniors' Centre too,

so...

rock on.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

Wow.

He really needs to keep his secret notebook

somewhere else.

Green ink. What a weirdo.

Brent got that pen from an F.F.S. convention

a few months ago.

F.F.S.?

Freaks For Sasquatch.

If you tilt it,

Sasquatch puts on a bikini.

I wonder if he bakes.

[laughing]

Too hairy,

but he is buff.

Hang on,

if this green pen is new,

how could Brent have written that song

back in high school?

Don't bring up the song.

We just got the band back together.

Hmm...

[Lacey humming] ♪ Your crispy crinkle fries ♪

♪ That pretty twinkle in your eyes... ♪

[humming]

♪ ...something-something teeth... ♪

Crinkle cut.

[gasps]

Aunt Ruby only served straight-cut fries.

Hey, Brent,

I've been thinking about changing up the menu,

getting rid of the crinkle-cut fries,

and going retro with straight cut.

What do you think?

No. No way.

Crinkle are the best.

Really?

Well, what is it you like about them?

I don't know,

I can't put my finger on it.

They're just great,

and they feel right.

I love them.

Well, if you love them so much,

why don't you marry them?

What?

That's not actually an option, is it?

[♪♪♪]

♪ I don't know ♪

♪ The same things you don't know ♪

[♪♪♪]

♪ I don't know ♪

♪ I just... don't know ♪

♪ Ooh... ♪

♪ It's a great big place ♪

♪ Ooh... ♪

♪ Full of nothin' but space ♪

♪ Ooh... ♪

♪ And it's my happy place ♪

♪ I don't know ♪♪