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1
00:00:08,470 --> 00:00:12,105
[footsteps rustling]
2
00:00:13,975 --> 00:00:18,077
To live a life free of sin,
it is not enough
to follow the rules.
3
00:00:18,079 --> 00:00:22,448
The moral and just answers
to life's difficult questions
lie within you.
4
00:00:22,450 --> 00:00:26,352
And you'll find ways to
ignore them, to twist them,
to serve your selfish desires
5
00:00:26,354 --> 00:00:30,323
but deep down you
know what is correct.
6
00:00:30,325 --> 00:00:36,262
James 4:17, "If you do
not do what you know is right,
you have sinned."
7
00:00:37,866 --> 00:00:39,299
[birds chirping]
8
00:00:39,301 --> 00:00:42,902
[dark dramatic music]
9
00:01:00,488 --> 00:01:03,923
You do realize
your venue has a past.
10
00:01:03,925 --> 00:01:05,225
Everything has a past.
11
00:01:05,227 --> 00:01:08,194
No, I mean like a past.
12
00:01:08,196 --> 00:01:12,365
Like little did they know,
200 years ago...
13
00:01:12,367 --> 00:01:14,000
[message alert beeps]
14
00:01:14,002 --> 00:01:16,469
In a relationship? Alexis?
15
00:01:16,471 --> 00:01:18,037
-Oh shit, sorry,
-[message alert dings]
16
00:01:18,039 --> 00:01:19,606
I didn't realize
you'd get a notification.
17
00:01:20,408 --> 00:01:22,041
I didn't mean to
upstage your wedding, Mia.
18
00:01:22,043 --> 00:01:23,009
Are you kidding?
19
00:01:23,211 --> 00:01:24,310
Gore, like that post.
20
00:01:24,312 --> 00:01:25,378
Who's the guy?
21
00:01:25,380 --> 00:01:27,046
Totally stalking him.
22
00:01:27,048 --> 00:01:28,248
[keypad clicking]
23
00:01:28,250 --> 00:01:29,949
Hello, Danny Ralston.
24
00:01:29,951 --> 00:01:30,917
Cute.
25
00:01:34,456 --> 00:01:37,323
[sinister music]
26
00:01:44,666 --> 00:01:45,932
[keypad popping]
27
00:01:45,934 --> 00:01:47,634
You guys are hilarious.
28
00:01:47,636 --> 00:01:49,168
Gore, are you going to
post anything funny for me?
29
00:01:49,170 --> 00:01:51,037
[keypad clicking]
30
00:01:51,039 --> 00:01:52,438
[keypad popping]
31
00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:53,973
I'm really happy for you.
32
00:01:55,377 --> 00:01:57,343
Sorry, was that super dramatic?
33
00:01:57,345 --> 00:01:59,545
Sometimes I forget how
to interact with real people.
34
00:01:59,547 --> 00:02:01,247
#momproblems.
35
00:02:01,249 --> 00:02:03,983
More like #everyoneproblems.
36
00:02:03,985 --> 00:02:05,385
-Totally posting that.
-[keypad clicking]
37
00:02:05,387 --> 00:02:08,321
[sinister music]
38
00:02:15,297 --> 00:02:16,596
-[reminder bell ringing]
-[keypad clicking]
39
00:02:16,598 --> 00:02:19,632
Oh shit,
it's grapefruit time, Gore.
40
00:02:19,634 --> 00:02:21,234
Grapefruit time?
41
00:02:21,236 --> 00:02:23,236
It's for the
Bride Boheme Cleanse.
42
00:02:23,538 --> 00:02:26,205
Mmm, it was on
the man of honor checklist.
43
00:02:26,207 --> 00:02:27,407
I must have missed that email.
44
00:02:28,710 --> 00:02:30,109
[Mia sighs]
[sent message whooshing]
45
00:02:30,111 --> 00:02:32,078
There were a lot of emails.
46
00:02:33,048 --> 00:02:34,247
Man of honor fail.
47
00:02:35,050 --> 00:02:36,983
[birds chirping]
48
00:02:36,985 --> 00:02:38,318
-Was that it?
-[keypad clicking]
49
00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:40,019
Okay, you're not navigating.
50
00:02:40,021 --> 00:02:41,120
[tires screeching]
51
00:02:41,323 --> 00:02:43,356
Sorry,
I was posting a humorous comment
52
00:02:43,358 --> 00:02:46,159
on Alexis's profile for you.
53
00:02:46,161 --> 00:02:49,429
Oh, okay, right, you're using
the OkCupid app to do that.
54
00:02:49,431 --> 00:02:52,598
-Okay sorry, I went on
like four dates yesterday and--
-Four?
55
00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:54,600
Yeah,
it's like sending out resumes.
56
00:02:54,602 --> 00:02:56,436
And no one's gotten back to me.
57
00:02:57,372 --> 00:03:00,540
It's just very surprising.
58
00:03:05,046 --> 00:03:08,114
Camp Pocumtuck.
59
00:03:08,116 --> 00:03:11,184
[sinister music]
60
00:03:11,186 --> 00:03:14,620
It was a steal on Airbnb
and we're their first wedding.
61
00:03:14,622 --> 00:03:17,256
You booked a
summer camp on Airbnb?
62
00:03:17,258 --> 00:03:19,559
[Mia] You can
book anything on Airbnb.
63
00:03:19,561 --> 00:03:22,095
"Electronic devices
will not be tolerated."
64
00:03:22,097 --> 00:03:23,496
Is this place Amish?
65
00:03:24,666 --> 00:03:27,200
[Mia] I think it's so
the kids can experience nature.
66
00:03:27,202 --> 00:03:30,703
"Inter-camper liaisons
will not be tolerated."
67
00:03:30,705 --> 00:03:32,505
-[giggles] Stupid.
-[cameras clicking]
68
00:03:32,507 --> 00:03:36,542
"Gum chewing, gambling,
and public nudity
69
00:03:36,544 --> 00:03:38,144
will not be tolerated."
70
00:03:38,146 --> 00:03:39,445
Interesting assortment.
71
00:03:40,048 --> 00:03:43,182
"Drugs and alcohol
will not be tolerated."
72
00:03:43,184 --> 00:03:46,686
Sorry, Camp Putuck,
I didn't pump three-days' worth
of breast milk to stay sober.
73
00:03:46,688 --> 00:03:51,457
-[chuckling]
-Well, I for one am gonna have
a serious inter-camper liaison.
74
00:03:51,459 --> 00:03:53,793
-Oh yeah.
-With Dalvaro.
75
00:03:53,795 --> 00:03:56,162
And I expect all of
your electronic devices
76
00:03:56,164 --> 00:03:59,766
to be posting up a
storm to #MiaCampWedding.
77
00:04:02,771 --> 00:04:05,538
[bird cawing]
78
00:04:05,540 --> 00:04:08,574
-Should I add #whatadivadoes?
-[keypad clicking]
79
00:04:08,576 --> 00:04:12,245
Oh no, that's just my personal
one. It's for my opera posts.
80
00:04:12,247 --> 00:04:15,114
Are we finally going
to get to hear you sing
at the talent show?
81
00:04:15,116 --> 00:04:18,718
Uhm, I haven't worked with
my voice teacher for a while.
82
00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:20,720
Oh, I forgot to
mention that the service
83
00:04:20,722 --> 00:04:23,689
is really kind of sketchy
so posts and texts will work
84
00:04:23,691 --> 00:04:25,825
but phone calls
really won't work.
85
00:04:27,228 --> 00:04:28,728
Text Scott.
86
00:04:28,730 --> 00:04:30,763
Can't do
Jefferson bedtime story.
87
00:04:30,765 --> 00:04:33,766
Wasn't informed there
was no service, ellipses.
88
00:04:34,602 --> 00:04:36,436
It was in
the bridal party email.
89
00:04:38,606 --> 00:04:39,806
[ominous music]
90
00:04:39,808 --> 00:04:42,608
[birds chirping]
91
00:04:53,822 --> 00:04:56,189
-[camera clicking]
-Oh.
92
00:04:56,191 --> 00:04:57,757
[Paulette] Please delete that.
93
00:04:58,626 --> 00:05:01,127
I can't. It's a Polaroid.
94
00:05:01,129 --> 00:05:03,863
Then just burn it and
you won't owe me for the cab.
95
00:05:04,866 --> 00:05:08,668
[chuckles] Oh man.
96
00:05:08,670 --> 00:05:13,106
Mia's Kickstarter video
was badass but it's better IRL.
97
00:05:13,108 --> 00:05:15,508
You should pay for
your wedding yourself.
98
00:05:15,510 --> 00:05:16,843
But it's the
crowdfunding that made it
99
00:05:16,845 --> 00:05:19,278
a Bride Boheme Special Feature.
100
00:05:19,280 --> 00:05:22,348
Mia really nailed
the cross-promotion.
101
00:05:22,350 --> 00:05:25,384
Wow,
this Mia sounds pretty amazing.
102
00:05:25,386 --> 00:05:29,856
-Whoa, you haven't met Mia?
-Nope.
103
00:05:29,858 --> 00:05:31,624
But I thought you were
the groom's best friend.
104
00:05:31,626 --> 00:05:32,692
Mmm hmm.
105
00:05:35,296 --> 00:05:36,729
[car rustling]
106
00:05:36,731 --> 00:05:38,598
Oh shit they're coming!
I got to hide.
107
00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:40,266
-Here first hold my gum.
-Oh.
108
00:05:41,736 --> 00:05:42,668
Okay.
109
00:05:44,372 --> 00:05:47,173
[ominous music]
110
00:05:47,876 --> 00:05:49,475
Oh, oh my gosh.
111
00:05:51,212 --> 00:05:55,148
It's so dilapidated. I love it.
112
00:05:55,383 --> 00:05:57,383
Okay, so we have a
few wedding prep things
113
00:05:57,385 --> 00:05:59,919
and then we can enjoy
the outdoorsy bachelorette fun.
114
00:05:59,921 --> 00:06:03,823
Oh sorry we couldn't do a
girls' night in the city, honey.
Our schedules just...
115
00:06:03,825 --> 00:06:05,725
It's okay. This is going
to be way better, you guys.
116
00:06:05,727 --> 00:06:08,861
I didn't want one of those
obnoxious bachelorette parties.
117
00:06:08,863 --> 00:06:11,531
Oh let the
bachelorette-palooza begin.
118
00:06:11,533 --> 00:06:12,899
[Mia shouting]
119
00:06:12,901 --> 00:06:13,866
And hi!
120
00:06:14,802 --> 00:06:17,403
Oh, Eileen, my friend from--
121
00:06:17,405 --> 00:06:18,838
-Community Theater, yeah.
-Community Theater.
122
00:06:18,840 --> 00:06:21,541
-You took forever.
-Oh
123
00:06:21,543 --> 00:06:23,309
-Oh!
-Oh, thank you so much
for including me.
124
00:06:23,311 --> 00:06:25,878
Oh, thank you for
coming all this way.
125
00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:26,846
Hi.
126
00:06:28,883 --> 00:06:29,882
Hi.
127
00:06:34,556 --> 00:06:37,323
Paulette,
it's really nice to meet you.
128
00:06:38,526 --> 00:06:39,592
[Eileen] Man of honor.
129
00:06:39,694 --> 00:06:40,693
[Gore] Oh, you know who I am.
130
00:06:40,695 --> 00:06:42,228
-Yeah.
-I, okay.
131
00:06:42,230 --> 00:06:44,197
And this one's for you.
132
00:06:44,199 --> 00:06:45,598
Thank you.
133
00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:48,568
And the biggest
and the brightest.
134
00:06:48,570 --> 00:06:51,304
Let's get this party started.
135
00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:55,508
I've got your favorite,
Bloody Eight fixings.
136
00:06:56,444 --> 00:07:00,780
-And penis straws.
-Oh my gosh,
that sounds really great.
137
00:07:00,782 --> 00:07:03,616
I was just thinking that we were
gonna get some lunch.
138
00:07:03,618 --> 00:07:06,452
And then we have a
brief production meeting
139
00:07:06,454 --> 00:07:08,521
in, you know, 20 minutes.
140
00:07:08,523 --> 00:07:10,990
So, um maybe later.
141
00:07:12,260 --> 00:07:13,492
-Babe, your...
-[gentle music]
142
00:07:13,494 --> 00:07:14,427
I bet.
143
00:07:21,703 --> 00:07:24,437
[Mia laughing]
144
00:07:26,708 --> 00:07:28,507
All right, smile, you guys.
145
00:07:28,509 --> 00:07:32,712
-It's my first #MiaCampWedding.
-[camera clicking]
146
00:07:32,714 --> 00:07:37,683
-Okay, so good. All right.
-Some info, this is yours.
147
00:07:37,685 --> 00:07:39,018
Here you are.
148
00:07:39,854 --> 00:07:41,687
Here you go.
149
00:07:41,689 --> 00:07:43,356
Take this one, Gore.
150
00:07:43,358 --> 00:07:44,790
-Alrighty, so I think
-[Gore whistling]
151
00:07:44,792 --> 00:07:48,361
everybody's almost done lunch.
152
00:07:48,363 --> 00:07:49,962
Well, I'm sorry,
I know you said everything
153
00:07:49,964 --> 00:07:51,697
would be gluten free,
but since you don't have
154
00:07:51,699 --> 00:07:54,734
a gluten-free kitchen, I
didn't want to take any chances.
155
00:07:54,736 --> 00:07:57,270
All this is supposed
to be accomplished today?
156
00:07:57,272 --> 00:07:59,405
No, no, just the Friday to do.
157
00:07:59,407 --> 00:08:02,975
Yeah, I'm
referring to the Friday to do.
It's really not that much.
158
00:08:02,977 --> 00:08:06,879
I mean, we just have
to get the playhouse ready
for the talent show.
159
00:08:06,881 --> 00:08:09,448
-And then we need to get
the cabins done for the guests.
-[bird cawing]
160
00:08:09,450 --> 00:08:12,285
Not going to take that long.
And then we're gonna
come back here,
161
00:08:12,287 --> 00:08:14,320
we're gonna arrange some
tables, throw up some lights,
162
00:08:14,322 --> 00:08:16,389
and we're going
to have so much fun.
163
00:08:16,391 --> 00:08:19,625
Oh, I almost forgot,
we have butterfly nets
164
00:08:19,627 --> 00:08:22,728
so like if you
happen to be prepping
and you find a butterfly,
165
00:08:22,730 --> 00:08:24,497
'cause we're going to have
a butterfly release.
166
00:08:24,499 --> 00:08:27,400
[gasps] Oh my God.
167
00:08:27,402 --> 00:08:32,438
-Let's do this!
-I get it.
168
00:08:32,540 --> 00:08:34,073
It's a plantation
wedding really.
169
00:08:34,976 --> 00:08:36,075
[door clattering]
170
00:08:36,077 --> 00:08:38,511
Guys, this is how weddings work.
171
00:08:38,513 --> 00:08:41,747
I mean, we didn't
have to throw her a shower
or a bachelorette party.
172
00:08:41,749 --> 00:08:43,749
And she let us pick out
whatever dress we wanted.
173
00:08:43,751 --> 00:08:45,751
-Hmm, as long as it was pink.
-[Paulette slurping]
174
00:08:45,753 --> 00:08:48,988
Hey, you know she would
be just as ridiculous
175
00:08:48,990 --> 00:08:51,824
-about helping us
with our weddings.
-We eloped.
176
00:08:51,826 --> 00:08:53,826
I mean, let's just suck it up
177
00:08:53,828 --> 00:08:55,961
and help make
her dream come true.
178
00:08:55,963 --> 00:08:58,597
[gentle music]
179
00:08:58,599 --> 00:09:01,600
[lively music]
180
00:09:01,602 --> 00:09:05,471
[message alert dings]
181
00:09:05,473 --> 00:09:08,007
-[phone vibrating]
-[boss] Nice pic on Facebook.
182
00:09:08,009 --> 00:09:10,643
I did not approve this vacation.
183
00:09:12,647 --> 00:09:14,513
-Hey, how's it coming?
-Hey.
184
00:09:14,515 --> 00:09:16,015
Great.
185
00:09:16,017 --> 00:09:18,784
Okay, so are all
the other cabins done?
186
00:09:18,786 --> 00:09:20,386
Did you split
them up with Paulette?
187
00:09:20,388 --> 00:09:23,789
No. I was just getting
this one wrapped up
188
00:09:23,791 --> 00:09:26,759
and then I was going to
go over to the next one
and get going.
189
00:09:26,761 --> 00:09:30,429
-So, none of the
other cabins are done.
-No.
190
00:09:30,431 --> 00:09:32,565
Okay, where is Paulette?
191
00:09:32,567 --> 00:09:33,899
I don't know.
192
00:09:36,404 --> 00:09:39,905
[door clattering]
193
00:09:39,907 --> 00:09:42,575
[gentle music]
194
00:09:48,816 --> 00:09:51,884
[suspenseful music]
195
00:09:54,989 --> 00:09:58,758
"Meet me tonight in
the clearing across the lake.
196
00:09:58,760 --> 00:10:00,793
I want you to be my first kiss.
197
00:10:00,795 --> 00:10:02,128
Chuck."
198
00:10:02,130 --> 00:10:04,497
[whimpers]
199
00:10:04,499 --> 00:10:06,699
[gasps]
200
00:10:07,435 --> 00:10:10,669
[liquid trickling]
201
00:10:10,671 --> 00:10:13,572
[message vibrating]
202
00:10:13,574 --> 00:10:18,010
[Dalvero] We need to talk.
Meet by the camp entrance
tonight after bedtime .
203
00:10:18,012 --> 00:10:20,112
[sighs]
204
00:10:20,114 --> 00:10:22,848
[gentle music]
205
00:10:24,118 --> 00:10:27,486
[dark eerie music]
206
00:10:37,899 --> 00:10:40,699
[pulsing music]
207
00:10:49,744 --> 00:10:51,510
Oh my God!
208
00:10:51,512 --> 00:10:52,912
You have to see this.
209
00:10:52,914 --> 00:10:54,513
[light music]
210
00:10:54,515 --> 00:10:57,216
Yeah, what happened
to the chair rental?
211
00:10:57,218 --> 00:10:59,084
-This camp was intense.
-[dark eerie music]
212
00:10:59,086 --> 00:11:00,886
Yeah, that's crazy.
213
00:11:00,888 --> 00:11:05,124
Can you clear the stage
and cover whatever that is?
214
00:11:05,126 --> 00:11:08,794
And you can figure out
the whole lighting,
sound situation, right?
215
00:11:08,796 --> 00:11:09,662
Sure.
216
00:11:09,664 --> 00:11:10,629
All right, okay.
217
00:11:12,700 --> 00:11:14,467
Oh, so it's time for canoeing?
218
00:11:15,570 --> 00:11:17,603
Yeah,
just come whenever you're done.
219
00:11:18,506 --> 00:11:19,972
[Gore sighs]
220
00:11:19,974 --> 00:11:23,476
-[board thudding]
-[dark eerie music]
221
00:11:23,478 --> 00:11:25,177
[phone vibrating]
222
00:11:25,179 --> 00:11:27,546
[Danny] I'm so hungry for you.
223
00:11:27,548 --> 00:11:30,082
[Scott] Jefferson's only
allergic to hazelnuts, right?
224
00:11:30,084 --> 00:11:31,750
-[bulbs clinking]
-Fuck, sorry.
225
00:11:31,752 --> 00:11:36,255
-No, my fault. Nothing broke?
-No, we're good.
226
00:11:36,257 --> 00:11:38,157
-[phone vibrating]
-[Danny] Get over here.
227
00:11:38,159 --> 00:11:40,059
We only have the weekend
before my girlfriend
228
00:11:40,061 --> 00:11:41,660
gets back from that wedding.
229
00:11:41,662 --> 00:11:45,064
-[bulbs shattering]
-Fuck! [grunts]
230
00:11:45,066 --> 00:11:47,933
Sorry, just got a weird text
message. I'm just gonna have
to find service.
231
00:11:47,935 --> 00:11:49,602
Okay, but if you see
any pretty wildflowers,
232
00:11:49,604 --> 00:11:50,769
can you bring them
and then you--
233
00:11:50,771 --> 00:11:53,739
[doors clattering]
234
00:11:55,142 --> 00:11:56,008
[Mia sighs]
235
00:11:56,010 --> 00:11:57,109
Dom.
236
00:11:58,112 --> 00:11:59,044
Dom.
237
00:11:59,881 --> 00:12:01,146
[grunts] 13.
238
00:12:01,148 --> 00:12:03,649
Oh hey, oh it was 14.
239
00:12:03,651 --> 00:12:05,518
How are the cabins going?
240
00:12:05,520 --> 00:12:07,820
Yeah, actually I'm all done.
We going to canoe?
241
00:12:07,822 --> 00:12:11,724
Yeah. So maybe you could
help Eileen with her cabin
242
00:12:11,726 --> 00:12:12,725
'cause she's falling behind.
243
00:12:12,727 --> 00:12:14,193
Okay, and you're going to--
244
00:12:14,195 --> 00:12:17,863
I got to do high
intensity interval training
245
00:12:19,700 --> 00:12:22,768
every three hours
to reduce water weight
246
00:12:23,804 --> 00:12:25,604
and flush my skin.
247
00:12:25,606 --> 00:12:28,240
[birds chirping]
248
00:12:28,242 --> 00:12:29,208
Paulette?
249
00:12:29,210 --> 00:12:32,011
[ominous music]
250
00:12:43,090 --> 00:12:44,657
Text Scott.
251
00:12:44,659 --> 00:12:46,759
Walnuts, exclamation point.
252
00:12:46,761 --> 00:12:48,894
Is Jefferson all right,
question mark.
253
00:12:48,896 --> 00:12:51,330
Fucking text me back, period.
254
00:12:51,332 --> 00:12:53,999
[bird cawing]
255
00:12:55,236 --> 00:12:56,235
Call Scott.
256
00:12:57,838 --> 00:13:02,675
-[eerie music]
-[wind howling]
257
00:13:02,677 --> 00:13:03,609
[phone ringing]
258
00:13:03,611 --> 00:13:05,878
[phone buzzing]
259
00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:08,814
[branch cracking]
260
00:13:18,926 --> 00:13:19,858
[message alert beeping]
261
00:13:19,961 --> 00:13:22,861
[suspenseful music]
262
00:13:26,867 --> 00:13:29,034
[tinkling music]
263
00:13:29,036 --> 00:13:30,135
-We'll catch up tomorrow.
-[Mia sighs]
264
00:13:31,806 --> 00:13:34,239
-Are you sure
your text went through?
-Yeah, I am.
265
00:13:34,241 --> 00:13:36,775
Are you sure nobody's
seen Flynn since before dinner?
266
00:13:36,777 --> 00:13:39,111
Maybe she's looking
for a gluten-free kitchen.
267
00:13:39,113 --> 00:13:40,379
[Gore chuckles]
268
00:13:40,715 --> 00:13:42,982
You guys, she gets really sick.
269
00:13:42,984 --> 00:13:45,217
That's why I got
gluten-free everything.
270
00:13:45,219 --> 00:13:47,886
Wait,
these are gluten-free s'mores?
271
00:13:47,888 --> 00:13:49,822
[ominous music]
272
00:13:49,824 --> 00:13:51,023
Oh, Jesus!
273
00:13:51,025 --> 00:13:52,224
Oh thank God.
274
00:13:52,226 --> 00:13:54,960
I need to use the van to get
somewhere with service, okay?
275
00:13:54,962 --> 00:13:57,696
Scott has Jefferson's
nut allergies confused.
276
00:13:57,698 --> 00:13:58,864
Is he okay?
277
00:13:58,866 --> 00:14:00,099
Scott's not getting back to me
278
00:14:00,101 --> 00:14:02,101
and I'm supposed
to call him at bedtime
279
00:14:02,103 --> 00:14:05,070
and I've never
been away from him.
280
00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:08,007
I'm just the
only designated driver
281
00:14:08,009 --> 00:14:10,409
and I just got Lasik so I'm
not allowed to drive at night
282
00:14:10,411 --> 00:14:14,279
for like a month and,
but if you need to make a call--
283
00:14:14,281 --> 00:14:15,881
You got Lasik?
284
00:14:15,883 --> 00:14:17,816
Yeah. Dalvero got it
for me as a surprise
285
00:14:17,818 --> 00:14:20,119
so I can go
water skiing in Cancun.
286
00:14:20,121 --> 00:14:22,187
-[all] Oh.
-[Flynn sighs]
287
00:14:22,189 --> 00:14:24,423
You could walk to Bufflehorn.
288
00:14:24,425 --> 00:14:28,894
It's just 7.8 miles.
289
00:14:28,896 --> 00:14:30,029
[grunts] Fuck it.
290
00:14:30,031 --> 00:14:31,230
It's your weekend.
291
00:14:32,066 --> 00:14:35,300
He'll be fine.
I just need to trust.
292
00:14:35,302 --> 00:14:37,436
Are you going to be okay?
Did you get dinner?
293
00:14:37,438 --> 00:14:39,738
I had some flax chips.
294
00:14:39,740 --> 00:14:41,674
Oh my God, you must be starving.
295
00:14:43,277 --> 00:14:45,411
The s'mores are gluten-free.
296
00:14:45,746 --> 00:14:46,945
Yeah, they're
right out of the package.
297
00:14:46,947 --> 00:14:49,782
They weren't in my kitchen,
just here.
298
00:14:50,418 --> 00:14:53,686
Take mine. It's not part of
the Bride Boheme Cleanse.
299
00:14:56,691 --> 00:14:58,757
Now that we're all here,
300
00:14:58,759 --> 00:15:00,993
maybe a little sneak
peak into the talent show?
301
00:15:04,932 --> 00:15:08,400
[animals warbling eerily]
302
00:15:14,241 --> 00:15:19,078
Summer 1985, Camp Pocumtuck.
303
00:15:20,081 --> 00:15:22,915
A picture of youthful innocence
304
00:15:22,917 --> 00:15:25,784
until it is deflowered by death!
305
00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:29,488
Wait, are you part
of the talent show?
306
00:15:29,957 --> 00:15:31,190
Yeah.
307
00:15:31,192 --> 00:15:34,093
Ghost story, summer camp.
308
00:15:34,095 --> 00:15:36,195
-Too tropey?
-Yeah.
309
00:15:36,197 --> 00:15:38,764
But it's true.
I did the research.
310
00:15:38,766 --> 00:15:41,266
As did I. It was
a social experiment gone awry.
311
00:15:41,268 --> 00:15:42,234
[eerie music]
312
00:15:42,737 --> 00:15:43,936
That's pretty obvious.
313
00:15:43,938 --> 00:15:46,205
But did you know
that the girl drowned
314
00:15:46,207 --> 00:15:48,107
because she was
struck by lightning?
315
00:15:48,109 --> 00:15:50,109
-[air whooshing]
-Odd.
316
00:15:50,111 --> 00:15:51,410
Wait, what are they
talking about?
317
00:15:51,412 --> 00:15:53,779
There was just
some unrest in the '80s.
318
00:15:53,781 --> 00:15:55,481
A camper drowned,
it was an accident.
319
00:15:55,483 --> 00:15:58,350
And honestly,
in the history of a camp,
320
00:15:58,352 --> 00:16:00,519
one death, it's kind of amazing.
321
00:16:01,155 --> 00:16:04,423
This is also the
location of an Indian massacre.
322
00:16:04,425 --> 00:16:05,491
[dramatic ominous music]
323
00:16:05,493 --> 00:16:08,227
And there were some
witch trials up the road.
324
00:16:08,229 --> 00:16:09,394
-[dramatic ominous music]
-[woman screaming]
325
00:16:09,396 --> 00:16:13,766
Nothing Salem level
but some girls got immolated.
326
00:16:13,768 --> 00:16:15,300
[fire snapping]
327
00:16:15,302 --> 00:16:18,504
Wait, is someone else
doing horror spoken word?
328
00:16:19,106 --> 00:16:20,773
No, they're not
but I think maybe
329
00:16:20,908 --> 00:16:22,875
you should try something
else a little less maudlin.
330
00:16:22,877 --> 00:16:24,476
Like what did
you decide to sing?
331
00:16:26,380 --> 00:16:29,014
[clears throat]
"Battle Hymn of the Republic."
332
00:16:30,985 --> 00:16:32,851
What, you said it
had to be rights free
333
00:16:32,853 --> 00:16:34,853
because of Bride Boheme
taking video
334
00:16:34,855 --> 00:16:37,456
but it's difficult to
find public domain songs
335
00:16:37,458 --> 00:16:40,259
and have time to rehearse
when you're a mom, okay?
336
00:16:40,995 --> 00:16:45,864
And I just sang it
for Jefferson's 1776 party.
337
00:16:47,368 --> 00:16:49,434
Why don't you guys
sing that together?
338
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:55,574
[crunching]
339
00:16:57,411 --> 00:17:00,445
Are these handmade marshmallows?
340
00:17:00,447 --> 00:17:02,347
Yeah, they're from that
great little place in my hood.
341
00:17:02,349 --> 00:17:03,582
All marshmallows
are gluten-free.
342
00:17:03,584 --> 00:17:06,118
-I checked.
-[spits] No!
343
00:17:06,253 --> 00:17:09,321
All mass-produced ones are
but some of the handmade ones
344
00:17:09,323 --> 00:17:11,156
use flour in the process.
345
00:17:11,158 --> 00:17:12,224
[spitting]
346
00:17:12,226 --> 00:17:17,029
Oh my God! [spitting]
347
00:17:17,031 --> 00:17:19,131
-Oh my God!
-What the fuck is that?
348
00:17:19,133 --> 00:17:20,199
Vodka.
349
00:17:21,969 --> 00:17:23,435
Wheat or potato-based?
350
00:17:23,437 --> 00:17:24,503
Cheap.
351
00:17:27,441 --> 00:17:28,373
It's okay.
352
00:17:30,144 --> 00:17:32,578
I'll know in a couple of hours.
353
00:17:32,580 --> 00:17:35,113
[tense music]
354
00:17:35,616 --> 00:17:37,316
-Another one.
-Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
355
00:17:37,318 --> 00:17:38,984
No green piles still?
356
00:17:39,453 --> 00:17:42,354
-Flynn!
-Oh shit, my tolerance is gone.
357
00:17:42,356 --> 00:17:45,357
Guys, help me drink
all this gluten-free beer
so it's a fair fight.
358
00:17:45,359 --> 00:17:46,458
Oh, got enough of this.
359
00:17:46,460 --> 00:17:47,593
[Mia] Bride Boheme Cleanse.
360
00:17:47,595 --> 00:17:49,061
-I'm okay.
-[bottles clanking]
361
00:17:49,063 --> 00:17:50,295
You're refusing alcohol?
362
00:17:50,297 --> 00:17:51,163
Are you pregnant?
363
00:17:51,165 --> 00:17:54,266
[Gore grunting]
364
00:17:54,268 --> 00:17:55,601
-Flick fly.
-Oh, fuck!
365
00:17:55,603 --> 00:17:58,036
Ah ha ha ha ha.
366
00:17:58,038 --> 00:18:00,105
[Alexis] Should we see if Eileen
and Paulette want to play?
367
00:18:00,407 --> 00:18:03,008
Can we discuss
Eileen and Paulette?
368
00:18:03,010 --> 00:18:04,409
Yeah. I know Paulette's
369
00:18:04,411 --> 00:18:07,179
Dalvero's weird
college friend but Eileen.
370
00:18:09,016 --> 00:18:11,083
I accidentally invited Eileen.
371
00:18:11,085 --> 00:18:12,885
[Gore sighs]
372
00:18:12,887 --> 00:18:16,255
¶ Na na na na na na na ¶
373
00:18:17,258 --> 00:18:19,124
[boss] Not
going to sugarcoat this.
374
00:18:19,126 --> 00:18:20,058
You're fired.
375
00:18:20,060 --> 00:18:21,894
[Eileen sighs]
376
00:18:22,563 --> 00:18:27,132
-Her email address
is flygirl77@--
-hotmail.com
377
00:18:28,035 --> 00:18:30,402
so autocorrect
thinking I typed in Flynn's name
378
00:18:30,404 --> 00:18:35,474
and now she thinks
she's a bridesmaid so, yeah.
379
00:18:35,476 --> 00:18:38,477
[somber music]
380
00:18:38,479 --> 00:18:41,914
[water splashing]
381
00:18:41,916 --> 00:18:44,349
-[Paulette sighing]
-[keypad clicking]
382
00:18:44,351 --> 00:18:45,951
[Paulette voiceover]
Can you be more specific
383
00:18:45,953 --> 00:18:48,921
than camp entrance
and after bedtime?
384
00:18:48,923 --> 00:18:51,023
[sent message whooshing]
385
00:18:51,025 --> 00:18:52,925
[person clattering]
386
00:18:52,927 --> 00:18:55,694
[crickets chirping]
387
00:18:55,696 --> 00:18:58,497
[ominous music]
388
00:19:01,068 --> 00:19:02,401
Shit, fuck, whore.
389
00:19:02,403 --> 00:19:05,070
Oh, fuck I miss swearing.
390
00:19:05,072 --> 00:19:07,339
Are you guys
getting baby pressure yet?
391
00:19:07,341 --> 00:19:09,074
Yeah, ever since
we announced the date.
392
00:19:09,076 --> 00:19:11,176
Fuckety fuck fuck!
393
00:19:11,178 --> 00:19:13,245
But, you know, it's just
for the taxes in other words.
394
00:19:13,247 --> 00:19:15,714
[sputters] Everything changes.
395
00:19:15,716 --> 00:19:17,082
Shit!
396
00:19:17,084 --> 00:19:18,150
It's like a mortgage.
397
00:19:18,152 --> 00:19:19,985
You sure he's a safe investment?
398
00:19:20,955 --> 00:19:22,254
Yeah,
what does that mean, Alexis?
399
00:19:22,256 --> 00:19:24,489
-Blitz.
-Mother of God, shit, whore!
400
00:19:24,491 --> 00:19:25,958
Fuck you.
401
00:19:29,663 --> 00:19:30,629
I--
402
00:19:30,631 --> 00:19:32,965
[crying]
403
00:19:38,539 --> 00:19:40,105
I got to take five.
404
00:19:41,041 --> 00:19:46,111
-[crickets chirping]
-[tense rhythmic music]
405
00:19:47,348 --> 00:19:50,549
Wow, you just let
her have that fantasy?
406
00:19:50,551 --> 00:19:54,386
She thought you two were
having a fren-a-ssance.
407
00:19:54,388 --> 00:19:57,155
[scoffs] Should have let
the poor girl off the hook.
408
00:20:02,596 --> 00:20:06,198
-[eerie music]
-[wind whooshing]
409
00:20:08,068 --> 00:20:12,070
What, it's a long story.
I mean, if anybody was
supposed to apologize, it's her.
410
00:20:12,072 --> 00:20:13,605
[Alexis] You guys, blitz pile.
411
00:20:13,607 --> 00:20:15,707
There are these guys
with these scary fucking masks
412
00:20:15,709 --> 00:20:17,209
out in the woods!
413
00:20:19,380 --> 00:20:21,113
[crying]
414
00:20:21,115 --> 00:20:25,384
-Couldn't they just
be other Airbnb renters?
-No, I booked the whole camp.
415
00:20:25,386 --> 00:20:28,320
I guess the escaped
convicts that are going to rape
416
00:20:28,322 --> 00:20:31,523
and murder us didn't book
their crime scene on Airbnb.
417
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:34,626
Were the strippers not a joke?
418
00:20:34,628 --> 00:20:36,228
Oh, you would've killed me.
419
00:20:36,230 --> 00:20:38,263
You hate all
flavors of exploitation.
420
00:20:38,265 --> 00:20:41,767
-[knocking]
-[all screaming]
421
00:20:43,737 --> 00:20:46,738
[dark eerie music]
422
00:20:49,510 --> 00:20:52,611
Gluten-free knife, just in case.
423
00:21:06,126 --> 00:21:09,061
[dramatic music]
424
00:21:10,798 --> 00:21:13,131
-Fuck this!
-[laughing]
425
00:21:13,133 --> 00:21:17,269
-What the fuck?
-Yeah, I'm sorry, boo.
426
00:21:17,271 --> 00:21:19,071
You were
supposed to come tomorrow.
427
00:21:19,073 --> 00:21:20,338
My fault,
I had Jack drive us up.
428
00:21:20,340 --> 00:21:21,606
Dalvero didn't even know.
429
00:21:22,509 --> 00:21:23,775
Yeah, well he knew
he was wearing a mask
430
00:21:25,279 --> 00:21:26,261
to scare the shit out of us.
431
00:21:26,262 --> 00:21:27,244
It was really
poor judgment on our part.
432
00:21:27,247 --> 00:21:29,614
But this way we can
help you first thing tomorrow.
433
00:21:29,616 --> 00:21:30,615
Hey.
434
00:21:31,418 --> 00:21:33,118
Oh, hey, you made it.
435
00:21:33,120 --> 00:21:33,852
Shocked?
436
00:21:35,422 --> 00:21:37,355
I'm Trask, groomsman.
437
00:21:37,357 --> 00:21:40,092
Sorry if you all
thought I was a murderer.
438
00:21:40,094 --> 00:21:42,461
This is Jack,
best man, designated driver.
439
00:21:43,497 --> 00:21:45,630
And you all know Dalvero.
440
00:21:45,632 --> 00:21:48,233
Uh, sorry to
psychologically molest you all.
441
00:21:48,569 --> 00:21:50,569
Hi, I'm Eileen.
442
00:21:50,571 --> 00:21:52,204
I'm not supposed to be here
443
00:21:52,206 --> 00:21:53,572
but I'm just going with it.
444
00:21:55,342 --> 00:21:58,477
Okay, I think we
should all just go to bed
445
00:21:58,479 --> 00:22:00,545
because we have a
very big day tomorrow.
446
00:22:00,547 --> 00:22:03,882
-The big day, boo.
-[Mia chuckles]
447
00:22:06,820 --> 00:22:07,819
Sweet dreams.
448
00:22:12,259 --> 00:22:13,458
[Dalvero] Come on, Jack.
449
00:22:17,631 --> 00:22:21,600
-Oh, mother of God.
-Who is Trask?
450
00:22:21,602 --> 00:22:23,602
He's one of
Dalvero's douchey work friends.
451
00:22:23,604 --> 00:22:25,437
He's really not that sexy.
452
00:22:25,439 --> 00:22:27,839
Bride blindness,
he's everything.
453
00:22:27,841 --> 00:22:29,407
Okay, lights out, all right?
454
00:22:29,409 --> 00:22:31,209
We kind of got a
lot to do tomorrow.
455
00:22:31,211 --> 00:22:33,745
-He's kind of too much.
-No such thing.
456
00:22:33,747 --> 00:22:35,647
Mia, what team?
457
00:22:35,649 --> 00:22:37,516
[sputtering] Straight
guys don't look like that.
458
00:22:37,518 --> 00:22:41,186
Oh, Flynn, welcome to
the decade of CrossFit.
459
00:22:41,188 --> 00:22:42,587
I'll take one for the team
460
00:22:42,589 --> 00:22:45,524
and propose some
inter-camper liaisons.
461
00:22:45,526 --> 00:22:46,658
[Flynn giggling]
462
00:22:46,660 --> 00:22:48,460
Dalvero mentioned he had a wife.
463
00:22:48,462 --> 00:22:50,162
He could be bi.
464
00:22:50,164 --> 00:22:54,866
-And polyamorous.
-Well, what about Jack?
You guys seemed to have
465
00:22:54,868 --> 00:22:59,237
a little moment there and you
bonded over hating Tom Hanks
at my engagement party.
466
00:22:59,239 --> 00:23:01,840
And we made out
and he never responded
467
00:23:01,842 --> 00:23:03,175
to my follow-up text.
468
00:23:03,177 --> 00:23:04,643
Bridal Yenta fail.
469
00:23:04,645 --> 00:23:08,647
Anyway I've moved
on to Traskier things.
470
00:23:08,649 --> 00:23:10,515
Who doesn't love Tom Hanks?
471
00:23:10,517 --> 00:23:11,516
Good night.
472
00:23:11,518 --> 00:23:14,452
[tense electronic music]
473
00:23:17,824 --> 00:23:19,958
Well,
he said he'd text me but...
474
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:21,793
Oh, pull
the fucking reigns on that.
475
00:23:21,795 --> 00:23:23,495
If you like him, text him.
476
00:23:23,497 --> 00:23:25,564
-It's late.
-Fuck late.
477
00:23:25,566 --> 00:23:26,498
Late's hot.
478
00:23:26,500 --> 00:23:28,500
Late's desperate.
479
00:23:28,502 --> 00:23:30,402
Ignore the man who
hasn't dated since high school.
480
00:23:30,404 --> 00:23:31,870
I am very happily married.
481
00:23:31,872 --> 00:23:34,839
That was before
apps and texting.
482
00:23:34,841 --> 00:23:36,441
Dating is like espionage now.
483
00:23:37,211 --> 00:23:38,643
I'll get intelligence from Mia.
484
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:41,479
Fuck, I'm out.
485
00:23:41,481 --> 00:23:43,381
[laughing] Good night.
486
00:23:43,917 --> 00:23:44,783
Come on, one more round.
487
00:23:44,785 --> 00:23:46,551
[hands thudding]
488
00:23:46,553 --> 00:23:49,688
I can bet a professional
lap dance worth $55.
489
00:23:49,690 --> 00:23:51,790
-It's how I paid for my MBA.
-Off!
490
00:23:51,792 --> 00:23:53,959
It's your last night of freedom.
Taste the magic.
491
00:23:53,961 --> 00:23:56,928
-Go the fuck to sleep.
-On the house then.
492
00:23:56,930 --> 00:23:59,431
Show them my loyalty to you
and the bank knows no bounds.
493
00:23:59,433 --> 00:24:01,366
Stop kissing ass. You'll get VP.
494
00:24:09,910 --> 00:24:11,476
[Jack sighs]
495
00:24:11,478 --> 00:24:14,512
You're really
stiff for this guy.
496
00:24:14,514 --> 00:24:15,580
Ah shit.
497
00:24:15,582 --> 00:24:16,715
Best man speech.
498
00:24:18,819 --> 00:24:20,619
Come with me.
I got just the thing.
499
00:24:26,526 --> 00:24:29,728
[footsteps crunching]
500
00:24:32,833 --> 00:24:35,400
The fucking outdoors!
501
00:24:44,878 --> 00:24:47,646
[ominous music]
502
00:24:50,684 --> 00:24:53,585
Re-trip,
then you do your speech.
503
00:24:53,587 --> 00:24:54,786
Tomorow'll be easy.
504
00:24:55,822 --> 00:24:56,755
Genius, right?
505
00:24:58,625 --> 00:25:00,292
I've never actually uh--
506
00:25:00,294 --> 00:25:01,760
Oh.
507
00:25:01,762 --> 00:25:02,994
Virgin territory.
508
00:25:04,331 --> 00:25:05,497
[Jack chuckling]
509
00:25:09,836 --> 00:25:14,472
Okay, electronic devices
will not be tolerated.
510
00:25:15,575 --> 00:25:16,508
Please.
511
00:25:17,311 --> 00:25:18,543
There's so much to do.
512
00:25:19,513 --> 00:25:21,379
You friends with
Trask on Facebook?
513
00:25:22,516 --> 00:25:23,581
Powering down.
514
00:25:27,487 --> 00:25:29,754
Dalvero's substance abuse issues
515
00:25:29,756 --> 00:25:31,556
are well known to his friends.
516
00:25:31,725 --> 00:25:35,093
He is literally
addicted to substance.
[chuckles]
517
00:25:36,430 --> 00:25:38,863
[Trask laughing]
518
00:25:38,865 --> 00:25:41,433
He binges podcasts.
519
00:25:41,435 --> 00:25:44,836
Terry Gross is his celeb crush.
520
00:25:44,838 --> 00:25:49,908
And he'd donate a
kidney to Noam Chomsky.
521
00:25:49,910 --> 00:25:54,479
[laughing]
I'm going to pee in my pants.
522
00:25:57,784 --> 00:26:00,752
[tense music]
When I get back you're totally
going to sext that Gore dude.
523
00:26:02,089 --> 00:26:04,756
[eerie music]
524
00:26:09,796 --> 00:26:12,731
[phone vibrating]
525
00:26:17,738 --> 00:26:19,537
[Trask voiceover]
Hey, it's Trask.
526
00:26:19,539 --> 00:26:20,905
Want to meet at the playhouse?
527
00:26:24,511 --> 00:26:27,579
-[Alexis voiceover]
You are not Trask.
-[keypad clicking]
528
00:26:27,581 --> 00:26:31,616
-Who are you?
-[sent message whooshing]
529
00:26:31,618 --> 00:26:34,919
-[message vibrating]
-[Trask] Trask. What the fuck?
530
00:26:34,921 --> 00:26:36,788
Got your number
off Mia's contact sheet.
531
00:26:36,790 --> 00:26:38,623
You are so my thing.
532
00:26:39,526 --> 00:26:40,425
[message vibrating]
533
00:26:40,427 --> 00:26:41,393
I'm waiting.
534
00:26:54,174 --> 00:26:56,841
[eerie music]
535
00:27:04,718 --> 00:27:07,585
[door squeaking]
536
00:27:08,688 --> 00:27:09,621
Trask?
537
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:20,532
[fan screeching]
538
00:27:24,871 --> 00:27:27,439
[grunts] What am I doing?
539
00:27:29,943 --> 00:27:31,009
[message vibrating]
540
00:27:37,851 --> 00:27:40,919
[Trask] Nice catch, sir. Bring
my mask and a couple of zip ties
541
00:27:40,921 --> 00:27:42,921
and meet me on the
other side of the lake.
542
00:27:46,660 --> 00:27:47,859
[keypad clicking]
543
00:27:47,861 --> 00:27:49,627
[Gore voiceover] Trask?
544
00:27:52,599 --> 00:27:53,498
[message vibrating]
545
00:27:53,500 --> 00:27:54,232
[Trask] Duh.
546
00:27:55,569 --> 00:27:56,968
[keypad clicking]
547
00:27:57,070 --> 00:27:59,170
[Gore voiceover] How
did you get my number?
548
00:27:59,172 --> 00:28:00,638
[sent message whooshing]
549
00:28:03,009 --> 00:28:04,242
[message vibrating]
550
00:28:05,178 --> 00:28:06,811
[Trask] Contact sheet.
551
00:28:06,813 --> 00:28:08,646
Not as bright
as you are handsome.
552
00:28:10,617 --> 00:28:13,785
[keypad clicking]
553
00:28:13,787 --> 00:28:16,988
[Gore voiceover]
That's a mildly creepy request.
554
00:28:16,990 --> 00:28:19,824
[sent message whooshing]
555
00:28:19,826 --> 00:28:21,526
[message vibrating]
556
00:28:21,528 --> 00:28:23,661
[Trask] Creepy equals sexy.
557
00:28:23,663 --> 00:28:25,663
Keep on the DL, duh.
558
00:28:25,665 --> 00:28:26,531
[message vibrating]
559
00:28:26,533 --> 00:28:27,265
Hurry.
560
00:28:33,540 --> 00:28:36,007
[tense music]
561
00:28:37,244 --> 00:28:40,245
[upbeat music]
562
00:29:02,936 --> 00:29:04,836
[message vibrating]
563
00:29:04,838 --> 00:29:07,906
[Trask]
You're on the pill, right?
564
00:29:09,676 --> 00:29:11,609
[keypad clicking]
565
00:29:11,611 --> 00:29:14,212
[Alexis voiceover]
No, but it's not an issue.
566
00:29:16,316 --> 00:29:21,886
-[keypad clicking]
-Yep.
567
00:29:22,055 --> 00:29:23,221
-[sent message whooshing]
-[dramatic music]
568
00:29:23,223 --> 00:29:25,890
[Mia gasping]
569
00:29:28,828 --> 00:29:30,995
-[keypad clicking]
-[Mia voiceover] Boo,
can you pick me up
570
00:29:30,997 --> 00:29:32,630
some grapefruits ASAP?
571
00:29:32,632 --> 00:29:33,665
Gore failed.
572
00:29:33,667 --> 00:29:37,602
-[sent message whooshing]
-[message vibrating]
573
00:29:37,604 --> 00:29:41,906
[Instagram] AlexisG77
posted to #MiaCampWedding.
574
00:29:52,185 --> 00:29:55,086
[keypad clicking] Hey,
what's with the scary selfie
575
00:29:55,088 --> 00:29:56,654
and where are you?
576
00:29:56,656 --> 00:29:57,622
[eerie music]
577
00:29:57,624 --> 00:30:01,025
[sent message whooshing]
578
00:30:06,099 --> 00:30:07,632
Gore, Go--
579
00:30:08,668 --> 00:30:10,802
What the fuck?
580
00:30:12,105 --> 00:30:13,905
-Shit.
-What's wrong?
581
00:30:16,142 --> 00:30:17,342
Where's alcoholic girl?
582
00:30:19,145 --> 00:30:21,179
[Flynn groaning]
583
00:30:21,181 --> 00:30:24,115
[ominous music]
584
00:30:28,955 --> 00:30:31,255
[grunting]
585
00:30:31,257 --> 00:30:32,223
[groaning]
586
00:30:32,225 --> 00:30:33,858
Flynn?
587
00:30:34,961 --> 00:30:35,960
Ah.
588
00:30:37,230 --> 00:30:38,730
[grunts]
589
00:30:39,065 --> 00:30:40,765
[spray hissing]
590
00:30:40,767 --> 00:30:43,134
[toilet flushing]
591
00:30:44,204 --> 00:30:45,169
Hey.
592
00:30:46,740 --> 00:30:48,806
Definitely wheat-based
vodka, sorry.
593
00:30:49,342 --> 00:30:51,776
It's quite the shit show.
Did I wake you guys?
594
00:30:51,778 --> 00:30:53,845
We're the only ones
left in the cabin.
595
00:30:55,849 --> 00:30:58,282
Why would she sully up
my feed with this?
596
00:30:58,818 --> 00:31:00,251
-Aye.
-[Eileen laughing]
597
00:31:00,253 --> 00:31:02,720
I'm just going to say
what we're all thinking.
598
00:31:02,722 --> 00:31:04,722
This is not a selfie.
599
00:31:04,724 --> 00:31:06,257
Someone else took this pic.
600
00:31:06,259 --> 00:31:07,859
Someone psychopathic.
601
00:31:08,128 --> 00:31:09,193
That's what we're all thinking?
602
00:31:09,195 --> 00:31:11,095
[Eileen scoffs]
603
00:31:11,097 --> 00:31:13,264
Alexis used to be goth, okay?
604
00:31:13,266 --> 00:31:15,433
She's probably just doing
some like bachelorette
605
00:31:15,435 --> 00:31:17,168
-haunted house thing.
-Is this her stuff?
606
00:31:17,170 --> 00:31:19,771
Hey, that is her stuff. Come on.
607
00:31:19,773 --> 00:31:21,172
I'm looking for a clue.
608
00:31:21,174 --> 00:31:23,441
[pills rattling]
609
00:31:23,443 --> 00:31:25,743
-Jackpot.
-Wait, no.
610
00:31:25,745 --> 00:31:27,812
-These are prenatal vitamins.
-[Eileen scoffs]
611
00:31:27,814 --> 00:31:29,781
Do you think she's pregnant?
612
00:31:29,783 --> 00:31:32,250
Uh, she refused that beer.
That's a first.
613
00:31:32,252 --> 00:31:34,886
Or she's trying to get pregnant.
614
00:31:34,888 --> 00:31:37,755
Maybe she was
cheating with the psychopath
615
00:31:37,757 --> 00:31:42,093
and she thought he was a full-
service sperm donor until...
616
00:31:43,163 --> 00:31:44,028
[screeching]
617
00:31:44,030 --> 00:31:46,264
Oh my God. Okay.
618
00:31:46,266 --> 00:31:48,232
Let me just go
check the boys' cabin
619
00:31:48,234 --> 00:31:50,334
in case they're not sleeping.
620
00:31:50,336 --> 00:31:51,703
[pills rattling]
621
00:31:51,905 --> 00:31:53,838
-[water splashing]
-[crickets chirping]
622
00:31:53,840 --> 00:31:56,908
[message vibrating]
623
00:31:58,278 --> 00:31:59,343
[Trask] Where are you?
624
00:31:59,345 --> 00:32:01,846
Starting to not feel this.
625
00:32:03,850 --> 00:32:04,982
[ominous music]
626
00:32:04,984 --> 00:32:07,185
[water splashing]
627
00:32:07,187 --> 00:32:09,987
[door creaking]
628
00:32:11,191 --> 00:32:12,356
[Mia] Boo?
629
00:32:14,494 --> 00:32:15,927
[Flynn] Where are they?
630
00:32:18,898 --> 00:32:22,734
-Oh, I asked him
to run an errand.
-[Flynn] Now?
631
00:32:22,736 --> 00:32:25,369
Oh, he picked up my dress
after the bachelor party.
632
00:32:28,074 --> 00:32:29,874
I'll be right back.
633
00:32:29,876 --> 00:32:33,010
[dark eerie music]
634
00:32:38,051 --> 00:32:39,183
[Mia] You guys at the store?
635
00:32:39,185 --> 00:32:40,518
Alexis posted this.
636
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:41,519
Can't find her.
637
00:32:41,521 --> 00:32:42,854
Is Trask with you?
638
00:32:44,023 --> 00:32:47,358
[Trask] Jack, where are you?
[voice echoing]
639
00:32:47,527 --> 00:32:49,026
[ominous music]
640
00:32:49,028 --> 00:32:50,294
[message alert dings]
641
00:32:50,296 --> 00:32:51,529
[Mia] You guys at the store?
642
00:32:51,531 --> 00:32:52,797
Alexis posted this.
643
00:32:52,799 --> 00:32:53,464
Can't find her.
644
00:32:53,466 --> 00:32:55,032
Is Trask with you?
645
00:32:58,104 --> 00:32:59,137
- Is this happening?
-[keypad clicking]
646
00:32:59,139 --> 00:33:02,273
[eerie music]
647
00:33:02,275 --> 00:33:03,441
Hey.
648
00:33:03,443 --> 00:33:06,978
[dramatic music]
649
00:33:06,980 --> 00:33:10,782
[grunts] Jesus!
650
00:33:11,251 --> 00:33:12,817
[Dalvero voiceover] Yeah,
boo, be back in a jiff.
651
00:33:12,819 --> 00:33:14,418
I'll text him
to look for Alexis.
652
00:33:14,420 --> 00:33:16,053
And is Gore not
into Jack or what?
653
00:33:16,055 --> 00:33:17,421
[sent message whooshing]
654
00:33:18,191 --> 00:33:20,858
[tense music]
655
00:33:24,264 --> 00:33:25,930
[message vibrating]
656
00:33:28,234 --> 00:33:32,804
[Trask] Come deeper into
the woods, put on the mask,
and zip tie yourself to a tree.
657
00:33:32,806 --> 00:33:33,805
I'll find you.
658
00:33:49,322 --> 00:33:52,190
[canoe scraping]
659
00:33:53,159 --> 00:33:55,259
[message vibrating]
660
00:33:55,261 --> 00:33:57,829
[Mia] Man of honor, need you.
661
00:33:57,831 --> 00:33:59,564
Where are you?
662
00:34:09,042 --> 00:34:11,475
[eerie music]
663
00:34:11,611 --> 00:34:13,277
[dramatic music]
664
00:34:13,513 --> 00:34:16,147
Alexis's phone
must've just died.
665
00:34:16,149 --> 00:34:17,582
And your best gay?
666
00:34:17,584 --> 00:34:19,183
Caustic drunk girl.
667
00:34:19,185 --> 00:34:20,918
What was it, a phone massacre?
668
00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:22,486
[message alert tinkling]
669
00:34:23,923 --> 00:34:26,924
[Instagram] Gore&More
posted to #MiaCampWedding.
670
00:34:31,865 --> 00:34:34,031
Trask is
flaunting his conquests.
671
00:34:34,033 --> 00:34:35,233
Trask?
672
00:34:35,235 --> 00:34:37,602
Who was everything to Gore.
673
00:34:37,604 --> 00:34:41,572
-And whose genetic makeup
would you want for a child?
-[Flynn grunts]
674
00:34:41,574 --> 00:34:46,010
He's some nympho psycho, so
bathed in unexamined privilege.
675
00:34:46,479 --> 00:34:48,145
This is just sport to him.
676
00:34:48,147 --> 00:34:50,014
Well, that's an airtight theory.
677
00:34:50,617 --> 00:34:52,984
Gore was acting
pretty desperate though.
678
00:34:52,986 --> 00:34:54,218
And prenatals?
679
00:34:54,220 --> 00:34:56,153
She wanted a baby bad.
680
00:34:57,156 --> 00:35:00,324
They could both be
out there still alive
681
00:35:00,326 --> 00:35:02,493
just bleeding out somewhere.
682
00:35:02,495 --> 00:35:04,095
How are you
even getting service?
683
00:35:04,097 --> 00:35:06,631
I've been trying to
text Scott all night.
684
00:35:06,633 --> 00:35:08,332
We need to call the police.
685
00:35:09,135 --> 00:35:11,102
Man of honor fail
is an inside joke
686
00:35:11,104 --> 00:35:13,137
and Gore was
probably in on the prank.
687
00:35:13,139 --> 00:35:14,639
We'll just wait
for them to scare me
688
00:35:14,641 --> 00:35:17,074
and then I will kill them.
689
00:35:17,410 --> 00:35:21,345
-You're not looking
to come with us, are you?
-No.
690
00:35:21,347 --> 00:35:23,481
I should stay
with my friend here.
691
00:35:23,483 --> 00:35:25,116
Are you going to be okay?
692
00:35:25,118 --> 00:35:26,183
[knife clinking]
693
00:35:26,185 --> 00:35:27,251
I'll be fine.
694
00:35:28,922 --> 00:35:29,987
[door creaking]
695
00:35:29,989 --> 00:35:30,955
[crickets chirping]
696
00:35:30,957 --> 00:35:32,590
Alexis! Gore!
697
00:35:32,592 --> 00:35:34,592
Shh, turn that thing off.
698
00:35:34,594 --> 00:35:36,027
We need to be stealth.
699
00:35:37,363 --> 00:35:38,963
Okay, I can't see.
700
00:35:38,965 --> 00:35:40,598
Your eyes will adjust.
701
00:35:42,602 --> 00:35:45,569
[door creaking]
702
00:35:47,273 --> 00:35:49,073
-[Eileen sighing]
-Coast is clear.
703
00:35:51,644 --> 00:35:54,178
While we're here,
we could just finish the--
704
00:35:55,048 --> 00:35:56,280
Stealth.
705
00:35:56,282 --> 00:35:58,082
People are coming tomorrow.
706
00:35:59,018 --> 00:36:00,651
-To a blood bath.
-[Mia sighs]
707
00:36:00,653 --> 00:36:05,156
[Flynn voiceover] Recovering
from an accidental glutening.
Hydration is key.
708
00:36:05,158 --> 00:36:07,358
Reach for
electrolyte-rich beverages
709
00:36:07,360 --> 00:36:08,559
such as coconut water.
710
00:36:10,363 --> 00:36:11,963
[grunting]
711
00:36:17,070 --> 00:36:18,970
[cap clattering]
712
00:36:18,972 --> 00:36:21,038
-[message alert tinkling]
-[Flynn gulping]
713
00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:22,173
[Scott] He didn't make it.
714
00:36:22,175 --> 00:36:23,240
So sorry.
715
00:36:23,242 --> 00:36:25,109
[Flynn spitting]
716
00:36:25,578 --> 00:36:27,979
[panting]
717
00:36:30,516 --> 00:36:32,516
[Flynn crying]
718
00:36:35,321 --> 00:36:37,221
[message alert tinkling]
719
00:36:38,458 --> 00:36:39,590
[man] You're next.
720
00:36:39,592 --> 00:36:42,126
[dark eerie music]
721
00:36:48,001 --> 00:36:48,666
-[door creaking]
-[tense pulsing music]
722
00:36:48,668 --> 00:36:51,102
Mia! Mia!
723
00:36:51,571 --> 00:36:53,004
Mia!
724
00:36:54,574 --> 00:36:57,441
[suspenseful music]
725
00:37:05,284 --> 00:37:08,452
[mysterious music]
726
00:37:09,022 --> 00:37:11,088
[Paulette voiceover]
If you're afraid to
talk about this wedding,
727
00:37:11,090 --> 00:37:13,491
it's obviously a mistake.
728
00:37:13,493 --> 00:37:14,692
[sent message whooshing]
729
00:37:14,694 --> 00:37:16,360
-[dramatic music]
-Jesus!
730
00:37:16,362 --> 00:37:17,294
Oh, hey.
731
00:37:19,665 --> 00:37:20,564
Are you okay?
732
00:37:20,566 --> 00:37:21,632
Amazing.
733
00:37:23,336 --> 00:37:25,136
What are you doing out here?
734
00:37:25,138 --> 00:37:26,337
I needed some fresh air.
735
00:37:26,339 --> 00:37:27,271
You?
736
00:37:29,375 --> 00:37:32,076
I, uh, gave the best man
shrooms to calm his nerves,
737
00:37:32,078 --> 00:37:34,612
but it freaked him out
and now I can't find him.
738
00:37:34,614 --> 00:37:37,515
You gave him
shrooms to calm his nerves?
739
00:37:37,517 --> 00:37:39,650
[sighs] For tomorrow
not like right now.
740
00:37:39,652 --> 00:37:41,385
You don't have any pot?
741
00:37:42,588 --> 00:37:44,755
I thought that would have been
better right before his speech.
742
00:37:44,757 --> 00:37:46,724
So you do have pot.
743
00:37:47,727 --> 00:37:49,260
[mattress rustling]
744
00:37:49,395 --> 00:37:53,564
Oh, maybe we could smother
Trask with one of these.
745
00:37:53,566 --> 00:37:56,434
¶ Oh oh oh oh ¶
746
00:37:56,436 --> 00:37:58,769
Oh, is that how you yawn?
747
00:37:58,771 --> 00:38:00,704
[binder thudding]
748
00:38:00,706 --> 00:38:03,074
You're like a big
opera singer now, right?
749
00:38:03,076 --> 00:38:06,644
-I love that #whatadivadoes.
-Thanks.
750
00:38:07,413 --> 00:38:09,713
I just looked at your profile
every once in a while
751
00:38:09,715 --> 00:38:11,282
-to see what you're up to.
-[tense music]
752
00:38:11,684 --> 00:38:14,652
Yeah, sorry about not accepting
your friend request yet.
753
00:38:14,654 --> 00:38:16,387
I just got really
busy with the wedding,
754
00:38:16,389 --> 00:38:17,655
so, you know, haven't had--
755
00:38:17,657 --> 00:38:19,390
[gasps] Oh my gosh.
756
00:38:20,827 --> 00:38:23,194
This camp is so adorbs
757
00:38:23,196 --> 00:38:24,728
and so un-PC.
758
00:38:24,730 --> 00:38:26,597
"Retarded"?
759
00:38:26,599 --> 00:38:28,766
What decade did
these kids come from?
760
00:38:28,768 --> 00:38:31,735
[Mia] I don't know. I think
they haven't had campers
for a while.
761
00:38:33,606 --> 00:38:35,106
[Dalvero] At your cabin.
762
00:38:35,108 --> 00:38:36,407
Where you at?
763
00:38:36,409 --> 00:38:37,441
Oh my gosh.
764
00:38:37,443 --> 00:38:39,343
This could be a trap.
765
00:38:39,345 --> 00:38:40,544
We should get Flynn's knife
766
00:38:40,546 --> 00:38:42,413
and take one of
these mattresses.
767
00:38:52,425 --> 00:38:53,958
[message alert dings]
768
00:38:53,959 --> 00:38:55,492
[Paulette] If you're afraid
to talk about this wedding,
769
00:38:55,495 --> 00:38:58,529
it's obviously a mistake.
770
00:38:58,531 --> 00:39:01,198
[keypad clicking]
771
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:04,435
[message alert dings]
772
00:39:04,437 --> 00:39:06,804
[Mia] Eileen's cray. She is
going to ruin the wedding.
773
00:39:06,806 --> 00:39:12,610
-Can you take care of her?
-[keypad clicking]
774
00:39:12,612 --> 00:39:15,713
[Dalvero voiceover] You
mean like be really nice to her
775
00:39:15,715 --> 00:39:19,283
-so she's not so cray?
-[sent message whooshing]
776
00:39:19,285 --> 00:39:20,217
[message alert dings]
777
00:39:20,386 --> 00:39:22,553
[Mia] No, not nice.
778
00:39:23,923 --> 00:39:27,691
-[keypad clicking]
-[Dalvero voiceover] Like,
scare her away?
779
00:39:27,693 --> 00:39:29,193
[sent message whooshing]
780
00:39:30,530 --> 00:39:31,395
[message alert dings]
781
00:39:31,397 --> 00:39:35,266
[Mia] Fine. Fine.
782
00:39:35,268 --> 00:39:37,334
[Mia sighs]
783
00:39:38,938 --> 00:39:39,937
Fine.
784
00:39:44,210 --> 00:39:45,176
Fine!
785
00:39:47,480 --> 00:39:50,848
-[keypad clicking]
-[Dalvero voiceover] Not
sure I'm down with this plan.
786
00:39:51,851 --> 00:39:54,385
[keypad clicking]
787
00:39:54,387 --> 00:39:57,521
So I'll scare her, okay?
788
00:39:58,658 --> 00:40:00,291
[alert tapping]
789
00:40:04,430 --> 00:40:05,663
[phone ringing]
790
00:40:05,665 --> 00:40:06,897
[Mia] Thank you for contacting
791
00:40:06,899 --> 00:40:08,766
How to Be Your Best Diva.
792
00:40:08,768 --> 00:40:10,467
Email's really the
best way to reach me.
793
00:40:10,469 --> 00:40:11,602
#whata...
794
00:40:11,604 --> 00:40:13,737
[keypad clicking]
795
00:40:13,739 --> 00:40:16,340
-[Trask] Dalvero's
totally sprung for that girl.
-[Paulette] Mm-m.
796
00:40:16,342 --> 00:40:18,576
He wouldn't even go in
the vicinity of a strip club.
797
00:40:19,512 --> 00:40:21,212
[sighs] That's not sprung.
798
00:40:21,214 --> 00:40:24,348
-That's whipped.
-[message alert beeping]
799
00:40:24,350 --> 00:40:25,516
Am I interrupting something?
800
00:40:25,518 --> 00:40:26,951
No, um, no.
801
00:40:29,222 --> 00:40:31,455
So what are you doing right now?
802
00:40:31,457 --> 00:40:33,390
Getting some fresh air,
remember?
803
00:40:33,392 --> 00:40:36,327
[Trask chuckling]
804
00:40:36,996 --> 00:40:38,762
I'm going to show you something.
805
00:40:38,764 --> 00:40:41,298
[Paulette grunts]
806
00:40:41,300 --> 00:40:42,399
Fucking hell.
807
00:40:46,772 --> 00:40:47,972
Fucking outdoors, right?
808
00:40:47,974 --> 00:40:49,840
[branches cracking]
809
00:40:49,842 --> 00:40:50,708
[fabric ripping]
810
00:40:50,710 --> 00:40:51,642
Shit.
811
00:40:55,848 --> 00:40:58,515
Where the fuck are we going?
812
00:40:59,619 --> 00:41:00,684
[fabric ripping]
813
00:41:03,889 --> 00:41:04,822
Follow me.
814
00:41:05,825 --> 00:41:08,559
[gentle music]
815
00:41:13,432 --> 00:41:16,600
[dial clacking]
816
00:41:17,903 --> 00:41:19,803
[phone ringing]
817
00:41:19,804 --> 00:41:21,704
-[phone buzzing]
-[car rattling]
818
00:41:23,376 --> 00:41:24,775
[tense music]
819
00:41:42,695 --> 00:41:44,795
[refrigerator rattling]
820
00:41:47,433 --> 00:41:48,732
[Dalvero] Jack?
821
00:41:48,734 --> 00:41:50,367
[ominous music]
822
00:41:50,369 --> 00:41:51,402
Jack?
823
00:41:57,576 --> 00:41:58,475
[Jack panting]
824
00:41:58,477 --> 00:41:59,510
Gore?
825
00:41:59,512 --> 00:42:00,944
[eerie music]
826
00:42:00,946 --> 00:42:03,047
Jack, what are you doing?
827
00:42:04,583 --> 00:42:05,516
Shit.
828
00:42:12,525 --> 00:42:13,457
Jack?
829
00:42:20,966 --> 00:42:22,633
[dark eerie music]
830
00:42:22,635 --> 00:42:23,634
Oh, yeah.
831
00:42:24,770 --> 00:42:25,703
He got her.
832
00:42:26,639 --> 00:42:28,572
Maybe she was chopping something
833
00:42:28,574 --> 00:42:30,641
and she cut herself.
834
00:42:30,643 --> 00:42:31,675
Are you high?
835
00:42:32,712 --> 00:42:35,512
Either Trask or
your husband-to-be
836
00:42:35,514 --> 00:42:38,949
or both or someone else
is killing everyone.
837
00:42:39,819 --> 00:42:41,585
But we haven't found a body.
838
00:42:45,624 --> 00:42:46,957
That's beet juice.
839
00:42:46,959 --> 00:42:48,859
-[Eileen scoffs]
-[ominous music]
840
00:42:51,697 --> 00:42:56,700
Everyone is missing.
We need to find a landline
and call 9-fucking-1-1.
841
00:42:56,702 --> 00:42:59,970
Unless you want
to deliver your vows
to a room full of coffins.
842
00:42:59,972 --> 00:43:04,541
If you would like to
explain creepy selfies to 9-1-1,
be my guest.
843
00:43:04,543 --> 00:43:07,678
I'm going to go find Dalvero
and I'm going to
sort this whole thing out.
844
00:43:07,680 --> 00:43:09,380
-I don't want you to die!
-Oh, you're
845
00:43:09,382 --> 00:43:10,614
wrinkling the dress.
846
00:43:12,685 --> 00:43:13,984
[Eileen panting]
847
00:43:16,956 --> 00:43:18,989
[crickets chirping]
848
00:43:23,729 --> 00:43:24,928
-[man] You're next.
-[refrigerator rattling]
849
00:43:24,930 --> 00:43:27,598
[eerie music]
850
00:43:36,842 --> 00:43:38,442
[keypad clicking]
851
00:43:40,713 --> 00:43:42,413
[Eileen voiceover] You're next.
852
00:43:42,681 --> 00:43:43,947
Hey, boo boo.
853
00:43:47,787 --> 00:43:48,719
Dalvero.
854
00:43:51,190 --> 00:43:52,990
Where the fuck is everybody?
855
00:43:53,993 --> 00:43:54,958
[sighs]
856
00:43:57,863 --> 00:43:58,796
[zipper zipping]
857
00:44:08,974 --> 00:44:11,675
[Holly] Hey, Mia.
I've been trying
to call you all day.
858
00:44:11,677 --> 00:44:14,545
Your fiancé picked up the
wrong dress from the tailor.
859
00:44:14,547 --> 00:44:17,181
But amazingly, this dress
is very close to your size
860
00:44:17,183 --> 00:44:20,717
and should just fit barring
any deviation from your diet
and exercise regime.
861
00:44:20,719 --> 00:44:22,753
My deepest
apologies for the mishap.
862
00:44:22,755 --> 00:44:24,655
-Holly.
-[Mia sighs]
863
00:44:24,657 --> 00:44:27,724
[eerie music]
864
00:44:27,726 --> 00:44:30,527
[Mia screaming]
865
00:44:31,864 --> 00:44:34,164
[phone ringing]
866
00:44:34,166 --> 00:44:35,933
[operator] 9-1-1,
where's your emergency?
867
00:44:35,935 --> 00:44:36,800
[dramatic music]
868
00:44:36,802 --> 00:44:37,668
Now who's next?
869
00:44:37,670 --> 00:44:39,203
[gasps] You're alive!
870
00:44:39,205 --> 00:44:40,103
Funny.
871
00:44:40,105 --> 00:44:42,172
[panting] Okay.
872
00:44:42,174 --> 00:44:44,808
You faked your own death
to throw us off.
873
00:44:44,810 --> 00:44:45,909
Genius.
874
00:44:45,911 --> 00:44:48,779
[chuckles] Except beet juice?
875
00:44:48,781 --> 00:44:49,713
Cut the bull.
876
00:44:50,983 --> 00:44:53,617
-Is my son alive?
-[tense music]
877
00:44:53,619 --> 00:44:55,552
Frame me all you want.
878
00:44:55,554 --> 00:44:57,588
You're the one who
disappeared for hours
879
00:44:57,590 --> 00:44:59,256
clearly to set traps for us.
880
00:44:59,758 --> 00:45:00,991
Are you even gluten-free?
881
00:45:00,993 --> 00:45:02,526
I have celiac disease.
882
00:45:02,528 --> 00:45:03,961
What did
accomplice do to my son?
883
00:45:03,963 --> 00:45:06,196
[grunts] Do you
even have a child?
884
00:45:07,032 --> 00:45:09,933
Or is it like you
invented an imaginary son
885
00:45:09,935 --> 00:45:13,971
to get attention and
now your fantasy is crumbling
886
00:45:13,973 --> 00:45:16,073
and you have to
kill off everyone by...
887
00:45:17,076 --> 00:45:18,709
[tense music]
888
00:45:18,711 --> 00:45:20,544
[shelves scraping]
889
00:45:20,546 --> 00:45:22,079
-[Mia grunting]
-[insect chirping]
890
00:45:22,081 --> 00:45:24,147
[sighs]
891
00:45:36,061 --> 00:45:38,161
-[grunts]
-[bed clattering]
892
00:45:38,163 --> 00:45:40,230
[screaming]
893
00:45:49,775 --> 00:45:52,276
[footsteps crunching]
894
00:45:54,246 --> 00:45:56,113
[Trask]
What'd I tell you, right?
895
00:45:58,050 --> 00:45:59,182
Wow.
896
00:45:59,818 --> 00:46:01,018
You got any more weed?
897
00:46:01,020 --> 00:46:03,086
Oh, I got some good shit
898
00:46:03,088 --> 00:46:04,054
like you died
and went to heaven.
899
00:46:04,056 --> 00:46:05,656
I'm pretty sure
900
00:46:05,658 --> 00:46:07,224
-I wouldn't like heaven.
-[belt clanking]
901
00:46:12,097 --> 00:46:14,731
-What are you doing?
-I'm getting comfortable.
902
00:46:14,733 --> 00:46:16,833
It's a hot night,
don't you think?
903
00:46:16,835 --> 00:46:20,904
Wow.
Does like say hello to my
package normally work for you?
904
00:46:20,906 --> 00:46:22,105
[scoffs] No.
905
00:46:36,221 --> 00:46:38,155
You should be
like way more dominant.
906
00:46:43,295 --> 00:46:44,628
[grunts]
907
00:46:44,630 --> 00:46:46,063
Better?
908
00:46:46,065 --> 00:46:46,997
Kind of.
909
00:47:00,679 --> 00:47:02,045
[door creaking]
910
00:47:04,750 --> 00:47:05,849
[Mia sighs]
911
00:47:06,785 --> 00:47:08,018
[message alert dings]
912
00:47:08,020 --> 00:47:11,188
[Annie] Hey,
sorry for the super late notice,
913
00:47:11,190 --> 00:47:13,323
but we can't
make it to the wedding.
914
00:47:13,325 --> 00:47:17,728
The car broke down and it won't
be fixed till next week.
Sad face.
915
00:47:18,263 --> 00:47:21,798
[Mia voiceover]
I already put in the
headcount to the caterers.
916
00:47:22,801 --> 00:47:25,035
Can't you rent a car?
That is so rude.
917
00:47:25,037 --> 00:47:25,969
-[sent message whooshing]
-[foot thudding]
918
00:47:25,971 --> 00:47:26,970
Gee.
919
00:47:27,673 --> 00:47:28,405
Sorry.
920
00:47:29,308 --> 00:47:30,974
Are you all right?
921
00:47:33,078 --> 00:47:34,311
Alexis?
922
00:47:39,084 --> 00:47:40,083
Alexis?
923
00:47:43,222 --> 00:47:45,255
Girl, you got-- what are you--
924
00:47:47,226 --> 00:47:48,158
Oh my God.
925
00:48:01,774 --> 00:48:02,706
Oh my God.
926
00:48:04,076 --> 00:48:05,008
Oh my God.
927
00:48:07,446 --> 00:48:08,311
Oh my God.
928
00:48:08,313 --> 00:48:10,447
[dramatic music]
929
00:48:10,449 --> 00:48:14,351
-[tense pulsing music]
-[crickets chirping]
930
00:48:20,759 --> 00:48:22,459
[car rumbling]
931
00:48:22,761 --> 00:48:24,828
[message alert beeping]
932
00:48:24,830 --> 00:48:26,997
[Mia]
Come to the playhouse ASAP.
933
00:48:30,836 --> 00:48:33,770
[keypad clicking]
934
00:48:36,442 --> 00:48:38,041
[panting] Oh God.
935
00:48:38,043 --> 00:48:40,844
[phone ringing]
936
00:48:41,880 --> 00:48:43,313
[phone beeping]
937
00:48:43,315 --> 00:48:45,315
Come on, come on!
938
00:48:45,317 --> 00:48:46,883
[phone ringing]
939
00:48:47,319 --> 00:48:48,185
[sputtering]
940
00:48:48,187 --> 00:48:49,853
Come on, come on.
941
00:48:49,855 --> 00:48:53,223
-[message alert dings]
-[tinkling music]
942
00:48:53,225 --> 00:48:56,727
[man] Hide the body. No one can
know or there'll be more.
943
00:48:56,729 --> 00:48:58,862
[dark eerie music]
944
00:48:58,864 --> 00:49:01,765
[eerie music]
945
00:49:01,767 --> 00:49:02,499
Shit.
946
00:49:03,769 --> 00:49:04,968
What the fuck?
947
00:49:06,739 --> 00:49:08,438
[message alert dings]
948
00:49:09,007 --> 00:49:12,175
[Queena] Great news.
The videographer was approved.
949
00:49:12,177 --> 00:49:14,811
Can you just
resend me the camp address?
950
00:49:14,813 --> 00:49:16,046
Can't seem to find it.
951
00:49:16,048 --> 00:49:17,914
-See you tomorrow.
-What?
952
00:49:19,852 --> 00:49:23,120
-Uh, do.
-[message alert dings]
953
00:49:23,122 --> 00:49:24,054
[man] Hide it now!
954
00:49:24,389 --> 00:49:26,990
[dark eerie music]
955
00:49:32,264 --> 00:49:34,765
[thudding music]
956
00:49:34,933 --> 00:49:35,832
[canoe scraping]
957
00:49:35,834 --> 00:49:38,135
[ominous music]
958
00:49:38,137 --> 00:49:40,470
[scary music]
959
00:49:40,472 --> 00:49:41,772
[canoe scraping]
960
00:49:41,774 --> 00:49:44,775
[crickets chirping]
961
00:49:45,210 --> 00:49:46,143
Jack!
962
00:49:47,913 --> 00:49:49,246
Trask, what the hell, man?
963
00:49:53,252 --> 00:49:54,184
Gore?
964
00:49:56,355 --> 00:49:57,788
What's going on?
965
00:50:00,092 --> 00:50:01,291
Is this some kind of game?
966
00:50:03,362 --> 00:50:07,264
I know Mia has
been kind of intense
967
00:50:07,266 --> 00:50:10,400
with the wedding prep
and the man of honor checklist.
968
00:50:10,402 --> 00:50:13,036
She BBC'd me.
969
00:50:13,038 --> 00:50:15,272
But she really
just wants this to be
970
00:50:15,274 --> 00:50:16,873
a wonderful
experience for everyone.
971
00:50:18,877 --> 00:50:22,112
Uh, look, I know
you've known her half her life
972
00:50:22,114 --> 00:50:25,415
and I'm just some guy
in a long line of guys.
973
00:50:25,417 --> 00:50:28,485
I don't really want to know how
long so please don't tell me.
974
00:50:28,487 --> 00:50:31,955
But seriously I'd
do anything for her.
975
00:50:33,192 --> 00:50:34,524
I know you would, too.
976
00:50:34,526 --> 00:50:37,828
I mean, if you were straight,
you would
probably be marrying her.
977
00:50:37,829 --> 00:50:41,131
So, yeah,
I feel some competition there
978
00:50:41,133 --> 00:50:43,967
but I also think
of you as a friend.
979
00:50:45,370 --> 00:50:47,237
I hope you think
of me as one, too.
980
00:50:47,239 --> 00:50:50,540
And maybe this is premature,
but if we decide to have kids,
981
00:50:50,542 --> 00:50:52,342
we're thinking
you'd be the godfather.
982
00:50:55,480 --> 00:50:56,880
[tense music]
983
00:50:56,882 --> 00:50:57,614
Gore?
984
00:51:08,260 --> 00:51:10,927
[eerie music]
985
00:51:12,865 --> 00:51:14,497
[Trask] I'm just like
trying to be sure what--
986
00:51:14,499 --> 00:51:16,933
-[Paulette] No more talking.
No more talking.
-All right.
987
00:51:16,935 --> 00:51:18,001
-What are going to do?
-This is feeling much--
988
00:51:18,003 --> 00:51:20,103
-[dramatic music]
-Fuck!
989
00:51:20,105 --> 00:51:21,538
[Paulette] Fuck!
990
00:51:21,540 --> 00:51:22,572
What the fuck?
991
00:51:22,574 --> 00:51:25,242
[scary music]
992
00:51:31,283 --> 00:51:33,316
-[message alert dings]
-Jesus.
993
00:51:33,318 --> 00:51:36,419
[Instagram] TraskMan
posted to #MiaCampWedding.
994
00:51:41,293 --> 00:51:43,360
[door creaking]
995
00:51:43,362 --> 00:51:47,397
[singing in opera]
996
00:51:47,399 --> 00:51:50,500
-Oh.
-What the crap was that?
997
00:51:50,502 --> 00:51:53,236
I read a story about an
opera singer who got mugged
998
00:51:53,238 --> 00:51:55,906
and then she sang a crazy high
note and then he ran away.
999
00:51:55,908 --> 00:52:00,677
Well, we're all safe now, okay?
Eileen was behind everything
but I locked her in the fridge.
1000
00:52:00,679 --> 00:52:04,047
Wait, what? But Eileen was
with us the whole time.
1001
00:52:04,049 --> 00:52:05,448
Yes, I know. She must've done
it all before we got up
1002
00:52:05,450 --> 00:52:07,183
and then posted
the photos later.
1003
00:52:07,185 --> 00:52:09,219
I even found
her Polaroid camera.
1004
00:52:10,289 --> 00:52:11,254
Oh my God.
1005
00:52:13,325 --> 00:52:15,125
Is that your dress?
1006
00:52:15,127 --> 00:52:16,293
No.
1007
00:52:16,295 --> 00:52:18,194
Dalvero picked up the wrong one.
1008
00:52:18,196 --> 00:52:20,063
Shit, sorry.
1009
00:52:20,065 --> 00:52:24,968
-Is that why you
needed me here ASAP?
-Yes.
1010
00:52:24,970 --> 00:52:27,704
Sorry, but I need to
check on Jefferson, okay?
1011
00:52:27,706 --> 00:52:29,406
You don't mind if I
take Dalvero's car to Brooklyn?
1012
00:52:29,408 --> 00:52:31,641
Are you sure that
he's in imminent danger?
1013
00:52:31,643 --> 00:52:33,243
[keypad clicking]
1014
00:52:35,447 --> 00:52:36,947
And then seconds later...
1015
00:52:36,949 --> 00:52:38,682
[keypad clicking]
1016
00:52:40,953 --> 00:52:43,153
-Whoa.
-Right?
1017
00:52:43,155 --> 00:52:47,190
Okay, do you think that
there is also a killer here?
1018
00:52:47,592 --> 00:52:48,458
Killer?
1019
00:52:48,460 --> 00:52:49,559
Is someone dead?
1020
00:52:51,396 --> 00:52:52,562
No, no.
1021
00:52:54,333 --> 00:52:55,532
No, just the selfies.
1022
00:52:55,534 --> 00:52:57,200
Eileen probably roofied them.
1023
00:52:57,202 --> 00:52:58,601
Who knows what she's capable of.
1024
00:52:58,603 --> 00:53:00,370
She was
projecting her crimes on me.
1025
00:53:00,372 --> 00:53:02,372
It's just all so sick and weird.
1026
00:53:03,375 --> 00:53:05,742
-I should have told her
about the email mix-up.
-Don't blame yourself.
1027
00:53:05,744 --> 00:53:08,078
This country is a disaster when
dealing with mental illness.
1028
00:53:08,080 --> 00:53:10,313
Okay, I'm going to go
find service and call 9-1-1.
1029
00:53:10,315 --> 00:53:13,149
You just stay here and
wait for the police, okay?
1030
00:53:13,151 --> 00:53:15,752
[gentle music]
1031
00:53:18,023 --> 00:53:19,055
-[message alerts beeping]
-[refrigerator rattling]
1032
00:53:19,057 --> 00:53:21,658
[Eileen crying]
1033
00:53:22,661 --> 00:53:25,462
[ominous music]
1034
00:53:27,265 --> 00:53:30,400
¶ Mine eyes have seen the glory¶
1035
00:53:30,402 --> 00:53:33,503
¶ Of the coming the Lord¶
1036
00:53:33,505 --> 00:53:37,340
¶ He has
Trampled out the vintage ¶
1037
00:53:37,342 --> 00:53:39,609
¶ Where the grapes of wrath
Are stored ¶
1038
00:53:40,245 --> 00:53:41,511
[dramatic music]
1039
00:53:41,513 --> 00:53:45,749
[Fitbit] Congratulations. You've
had your most active day yet.
1040
00:53:45,751 --> 00:53:48,318
-Way to go.
-[message alert dings]
1041
00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:49,552
[Dalvero] Hey,
why'd you run from me?
1042
00:53:49,554 --> 00:53:50,787
I need your help with Gore.
1043
00:53:50,789 --> 00:53:52,422
I think he's really hurt.
1044
00:53:52,424 --> 00:53:53,656
Meet me at the canoes.
1045
00:53:56,128 --> 00:53:57,427
[Paulette gasping]
1046
00:53:58,697 --> 00:54:01,331
One, two, three,
four, five, six, seven,
1047
00:54:01,333 --> 00:54:03,333
eight, nine, ten.
1048
00:54:03,335 --> 00:54:04,334
Shit!
1049
00:54:05,103 --> 00:54:06,036
[keypad clicking]
1050
00:54:06,038 --> 00:54:08,638
[phone ringing]
1051
00:54:11,076 --> 00:54:13,276
One, two,
three, four, five, six,
1052
00:54:13,278 --> 00:54:14,577
seven, eight, nine, ten.
1053
00:54:14,579 --> 00:54:19,716
-[phone beeping]
-Oh! Okay.
1054
00:54:20,052 --> 00:54:22,485
[Dalvero] Hey, big favor, can
you meet Paulette by the camp
entrance and give her
1055
00:54:22,487 --> 00:54:26,456
that lap dance and more?
She needs to chill the fuck out.
1056
00:54:26,458 --> 00:54:27,757
[Trask] For real?
1057
00:54:27,759 --> 00:54:29,692
Not cheating on my wife.
1058
00:54:29,694 --> 00:54:31,661
[Dalvero] Guess
you're not ready to be VP.
1059
00:54:31,663 --> 00:54:33,096
[panting] What?
1060
00:54:33,098 --> 00:54:34,164
-[message beeping]
-Oh my--
1061
00:54:34,166 --> 00:54:35,632
[man] Hide the body.
1062
00:54:35,634 --> 00:54:37,667
No one can know
or there'll be more.
1063
00:54:37,669 --> 00:54:39,602
[ominous music]
1064
00:54:39,604 --> 00:54:40,537
Oh, um.
1065
00:54:42,374 --> 00:54:43,640
[grunts]
1066
00:54:43,642 --> 00:54:46,476
[zipper zips]
1067
00:54:50,215 --> 00:54:51,781
[gun clicking]
1068
00:54:51,783 --> 00:54:52,715
Why?
1069
00:54:58,457 --> 00:55:01,357
[message beeping]
1070
00:55:02,761 --> 00:55:04,561
[man] Hide it now.
1071
00:55:05,397 --> 00:55:09,199
-[door thudding]
-¶ Glory, glory, hallelujah ¶
1072
00:55:09,201 --> 00:55:13,269
¶ Glory, glory, hallelujah ¶
1073
00:55:13,271 --> 00:55:16,239
[crickets chirping]
1074
00:55:16,241 --> 00:55:18,708
[eerie music]
1075
00:55:25,450 --> 00:55:26,616
[Dalvero] Shit.
1076
00:55:26,618 --> 00:55:28,852
[canoe thudding]
1077
00:55:32,691 --> 00:55:35,692
[Dalvero grunting]
1078
00:55:38,864 --> 00:55:40,463
Oh fuck, oh fuck.
1079
00:55:42,334 --> 00:55:43,666
[message beeping]
1080
00:55:43,668 --> 00:55:45,468
[panting]
1081
00:55:45,470 --> 00:55:46,836
[Mia] Uh, sorry, Gore thought
1082
00:55:46,838 --> 00:55:48,505
he was supposed to scare you.
1083
00:55:48,507 --> 00:55:50,440
Eileen's in the cafeteria.
1084
00:55:50,442 --> 00:55:53,610
-[keypad clicking]
-[Dalvero]
So I'll scare her, okay?
1085
00:55:55,747 --> 00:55:57,280
[phone thudding]
1086
00:55:58,750 --> 00:56:00,650
[panting]
1087
00:56:02,721 --> 00:56:04,754
[tense music]
1088
00:56:09,261 --> 00:56:11,561
[message beeping]
1089
00:56:11,563 --> 00:56:14,397
[Eileen] Should have cut
me when you had the chance.
1090
00:56:14,399 --> 00:56:15,798
[dramatic music]
1091
00:56:15,800 --> 00:56:17,467
[ominous music]
1092
00:56:17,469 --> 00:56:18,668
[Eileen]
¶ The fateful lightning ¶
1093
00:56:19,171 --> 00:56:21,738
¶ Of his terrible swift sword ¶
1094
00:56:21,740 --> 00:56:25,475
¶ His truth is marching on ¶
1095
00:56:26,778 --> 00:56:31,614
-¶ Glory, glory, hallelujah ¶
-[cart clattering]
1096
00:56:31,616 --> 00:56:36,486
¶ Glory, glory, hallelujah ¶
1097
00:56:37,222 --> 00:56:42,358
¶ Glory, glory, hallelujah ¶
1098
00:56:42,360 --> 00:56:43,593
¶ His truth ¶
1099
00:56:43,595 --> 00:56:45,728
[Dalvero] Leave this place.
1100
00:56:46,698 --> 00:56:47,564
[feet thudding]
1101
00:56:47,566 --> 00:56:49,499
[shelves creaking]
1102
00:56:49,501 --> 00:56:51,734
[shelves clattering]
1103
00:56:57,842 --> 00:57:02,478
-[liquid dripping]
-[ominous music]
1104
00:57:02,480 --> 00:57:03,980
Where the fuck are you going?
1105
00:57:03,982 --> 00:57:05,748
[tires screeching]
1106
00:57:05,750 --> 00:57:07,517
[message alert dings]
1107
00:57:08,520 --> 00:57:10,353
[Queena] Please
send that address ASAP.
1108
00:57:10,355 --> 00:57:12,388
The crew needs to
get up there early.
1109
00:57:13,625 --> 00:57:16,526
-[keypad clicking]
-[Mia voiceover] Sorry,
it's one Pocumtuck Road,
1110
00:57:16,528 --> 00:57:19,529
Hennecker-Keen,
Massachusetts, 01313.
1111
00:57:19,531 --> 00:57:21,731
-Can't wait to finally
meet you.
-[door thudding]
1112
00:57:21,900 --> 00:57:23,666
¶ Oh oh oh oh ¶
1113
00:57:23,668 --> 00:57:25,735
Oh my God, my TV dinner dream!
1114
00:57:25,737 --> 00:57:26,769
Wow, you can sing.
1115
00:57:26,771 --> 00:57:28,705
Is that your wedding dress?
1116
00:57:28,707 --> 00:57:29,706
Uh.
1117
00:57:30,775 --> 00:57:32,508
What did gluten-free tell you?
1118
00:57:34,779 --> 00:57:36,946
[sputters] It's called
being framed.
1119
00:57:36,948 --> 00:57:37,914
Where is she?
1120
00:57:37,916 --> 00:57:41,351
Saving her son
from your accomplice.
1121
00:57:41,353 --> 00:57:44,320
I don't have any friends
that would kill children for me.
1122
00:57:44,322 --> 00:57:46,990
Have you ever
even met this Jefferson?
1123
00:57:46,992 --> 00:57:49,592
Yes, several times.
1124
00:57:49,594 --> 00:57:51,995
[scoffs]
She could have rented a baby.
1125
00:57:54,733 --> 00:57:57,567
[scoffs] Jesus, Mia.
1126
00:57:57,569 --> 00:58:00,637
People are dying and
you're still inviting bloggers?
1127
00:58:00,639 --> 00:58:01,704
Nobody's dying.
1128
00:58:01,706 --> 00:58:02,939
[screams]
1129
00:58:02,941 --> 00:58:05,675
[gasps] Oh, oh my God!
1130
00:58:06,811 --> 00:58:08,845
Jesus, Mia, is she okay?
1131
00:58:09,281 --> 00:58:11,414
-Uh--
-Have you checked her pulse?
1132
00:58:11,416 --> 00:58:12,882
Yeah,
I don't know how to do that.
1133
00:58:12,884 --> 00:58:14,651
We took CPR together.
1134
00:58:14,653 --> 00:58:17,553
[man] No one can know
or there'll be more.
1135
00:58:17,555 --> 00:58:18,955
Well, she's not alive.
1136
00:58:18,957 --> 00:58:21,057
She's your friend
and you're still trying
1137
00:58:21,059 --> 00:58:22,725
to make this wedding happen?
1138
00:58:24,029 --> 00:58:24,961
She's fine.
1139
00:58:27,632 --> 00:58:31,034
She just has one of
those artificial hearts
1140
00:58:32,537 --> 00:58:33,836
that has no pulse.
1141
00:58:36,875 --> 00:58:38,074
[dark eerie music]
1142
00:58:38,576 --> 00:58:40,943
[GPS] When possible,
make a U-turn.
1143
00:58:41,813 --> 00:58:44,013
When possible, make a U-turn.
1144
00:58:44,015 --> 00:58:46,749
What the fuck, lady?
I just made a fucking U-turn.
1145
00:58:46,751 --> 00:58:47,684
Jesus.
1146
00:58:49,020 --> 00:58:51,688
[tense music]
1147
00:58:52,490 --> 00:58:55,491
[crickets chirping]
1148
00:59:00,932 --> 00:59:02,799
[Gore thudding]
1149
00:59:04,402 --> 00:59:05,335
Sorry.
1150
00:59:25,757 --> 00:59:27,857
This is me
chilling the fuck out!
1151
00:59:30,395 --> 00:59:31,461
What did you do to Jefferson?
1152
00:59:32,630 --> 00:59:34,997
-Jefferson?
-My son.
1153
00:59:34,999 --> 00:59:37,967
-I thought he was in Brooklyn.
-Don't fuck with me.
1154
00:59:37,969 --> 00:59:41,604
-What are you doing with a gun?
-It's not mine.
1155
00:59:41,606 --> 00:59:44,707
Oh, does it belong
to your Bloody Eight friend?
1156
00:59:44,709 --> 00:59:46,743
You two team up
to ruin Mia's wedding
1157
00:59:46,745 --> 00:59:48,845
and harvest my son's stem cells?
1158
00:59:49,447 --> 00:59:50,446
Nope.
1159
00:59:50,448 --> 00:59:53,449
What are you
doing with Dalvero's car?
1160
00:59:54,452 --> 00:59:55,585
I'm borrowing it.
1161
00:59:56,588 --> 00:59:57,653
Perfect.
1162
00:59:59,724 --> 01:00:03,760
Let's borrow it back to camp
and clear this whole thing up.
1163
01:00:12,537 --> 01:00:15,538
[dark eerie music]
1164
01:00:16,975 --> 01:00:19,776
[door creaking]
1165
01:00:25,784 --> 01:00:28,084
[Dalvero sighs]
1166
01:00:28,086 --> 01:00:30,953
[Dalvero growls]
1167
01:00:33,158 --> 01:00:35,425
I'm really sorry
about the email mix-up.
1168
01:00:36,027 --> 01:00:38,194
I should have said something.
I just gave you the wrong--
1169
01:00:38,196 --> 01:00:39,195
Game over, Mia.
1170
01:00:40,598 --> 01:00:42,899
Inviting me here
was no accident.
1171
01:00:43,735 --> 01:00:45,435
You wanted revenge.
1172
01:00:46,070 --> 01:00:47,703
Revenge for what?
1173
01:00:48,072 --> 01:00:49,872
"Star Search."
1174
01:00:50,108 --> 01:00:53,843
"Star Search" was 20 years ago.
I'm over it.
1175
01:00:54,712 --> 01:00:59,582
You're telling me you're not
at all upset that I didn't
pick you up that morning
1176
01:00:59,584 --> 01:01:02,552
and you missed your audition
for the talent competition
1177
01:01:02,554 --> 01:01:04,053
of the late '80s, early '90s.
1178
01:01:04,556 --> 01:01:05,988
Yeah, your house
got hit by heat lightning
1179
01:01:05,990 --> 01:01:09,859
and your alarm got reset.
1180
01:01:09,861 --> 01:01:12,161
And you're totally fine
that I went the next day
1181
01:01:12,163 --> 01:01:13,095
and booked it.
1182
01:01:13,832 --> 01:01:16,999
We only got 1 1/4 stars.
1183
01:01:17,001 --> 01:01:20,136
And still managed to land a
Disney Channel Japan contract.
1184
01:01:20,905 --> 01:01:22,939
Okay, but that
wasn't really Disney Channel.
1185
01:01:22,941 --> 01:01:25,675
[Dalvero growling]
1186
01:01:25,910 --> 01:01:26,843
[gentle music]
1187
01:01:26,845 --> 01:01:28,611
And Hamlet.
1188
01:01:28,613 --> 01:01:30,513
What woman
wouldn't want to play Hamlet?
1189
01:01:30,515 --> 01:01:32,815
You didn't even
get Guildenstern.
1190
01:01:33,184 --> 01:01:37,153
You were just Fortinbras' wife.
1191
01:01:39,090 --> 01:01:41,023
[Dalvero growling]
1192
01:01:41,259 --> 01:01:44,694
Okay, maybe I was
pissed off about that
1193
01:01:44,696 --> 01:01:47,730
and maybe I had to
Google what heat lightning was
1194
01:01:47,732 --> 01:01:49,265
-and maybe on that day
-[Dalvero growling]
1195
01:01:49,267 --> 01:01:52,134
the weather reports
contradict your story.
1196
01:01:53,271 --> 01:01:55,204
Because my story is a lie.
1197
01:01:56,040 --> 01:01:58,207
-Huh?
-[dripping]
1198
01:01:59,844 --> 01:02:01,677
-[door clattering]
-[women screaming]
1199
01:02:06,818 --> 01:02:09,252
[Dalvero growling]
1200
01:02:09,787 --> 01:02:11,087
[women panting]
1201
01:02:11,089 --> 01:02:12,555
[Dalvero growling]
1202
01:02:12,557 --> 01:02:14,023
You'll never
outrun him in that thing.
1203
01:02:14,025 --> 01:02:16,292
-I can't get out of this.
-[Dalvero growling]
1204
01:02:18,263 --> 01:02:19,195
No!
1205
01:02:28,106 --> 01:02:30,907
[Mia screaming]
1206
01:02:34,846 --> 01:02:36,546
-[dramatic music]
-[wheelbarrow thudding]
1207
01:02:36,548 --> 01:02:38,114
[crickets chirping]
1208
01:02:38,750 --> 01:02:41,817
[suspenseful music]
1209
01:02:45,557 --> 01:02:46,322
[siren blaring]
1210
01:02:46,324 --> 01:02:49,025
[ominous music]
1211
01:02:51,930 --> 01:02:52,995
[tense music]
1212
01:02:52,997 --> 01:02:54,864
What the fuck?
1213
01:02:54,866 --> 01:02:57,300
[scoffs] When people
are freezing to death,
1214
01:02:57,302 --> 01:02:59,335
they figure shit out.
1215
01:02:59,337 --> 01:03:02,038
And you're reading
a lot into those texts.
1216
01:03:02,040 --> 01:03:06,008
[wheelbarrow creaking]
1217
01:03:06,010 --> 01:03:06,943
Am I?
1218
01:03:08,713 --> 01:03:10,346
-[message vibrating]
-[Paulette groans]
1219
01:03:13,718 --> 01:03:17,253
[Instagram] Dalvero
posted to #MiaCampWedding.
1220
01:03:17,255 --> 01:03:20,089
-[Flynn shouting]
-Stop! Get out.
1221
01:03:20,091 --> 01:03:22,925
-[Paulette grunting]
-[Flynn grunting]
1222
01:03:22,927 --> 01:03:24,126
[both shouting]
1223
01:03:24,128 --> 01:03:25,895
Oh, shit, shit.
1224
01:03:25,897 --> 01:03:28,698
-[Flynn screaming]
-[Paulette grunting]
1225
01:03:32,070 --> 01:03:33,269
[both screaming]
1226
01:03:34,973 --> 01:03:36,372
Get-- Oh, my foot!
1227
01:03:37,141 --> 01:03:39,308
[Mia] Wait, your mom OD'd?
1228
01:03:39,310 --> 01:03:42,011
Disney Channel
Japan was her rehab.
1229
01:03:42,013 --> 01:03:45,381
1 1/4 stars is television
leprosy. I didn't book shit.
1230
01:03:45,383 --> 01:03:47,116
[wheelbarrow thuds]
1231
01:03:47,118 --> 01:03:48,951
-[panting]
-Wow.
1232
01:03:50,221 --> 01:03:51,787
I kind of hated you actually.
1233
01:03:53,124 --> 01:03:55,691
I'm sure the Wendy's
commercial didn't help.
1234
01:03:55,693 --> 01:03:57,360
No, no, it didn't.
1235
01:03:57,362 --> 01:03:58,828
I didn't even try.
1236
01:03:58,830 --> 01:04:00,796
I just got
scouted at the Galleria.
1237
01:04:01,666 --> 01:04:02,999
[Mia grunts]
1238
01:04:04,369 --> 01:04:06,068
I've been
trying to say I'm sorry
1239
01:04:06,070 --> 01:04:07,903
since I found you on Facebook.
1240
01:04:08,640 --> 01:04:11,707
I thought the
bridesmaid email was your way
1241
01:04:11,709 --> 01:04:13,876
of accepting my apology.
1242
01:04:19,317 --> 01:04:21,651
-I suck.
-[Eileen sighs]
1243
01:04:21,653 --> 01:04:25,688
And see, you're the one
who became a star.
1244
01:04:26,791 --> 01:04:28,691
I paid the karmic price.
1245
01:04:30,428 --> 01:04:35,331
Actually, I know that I seem
like I'm this big opera star
1246
01:04:35,333 --> 01:04:39,435
'cause I post on Facebook
but I'm not. [sighs]
1247
01:04:39,437 --> 01:04:41,804
Had this like
really bad vocal crisis
1248
01:04:41,806 --> 01:04:46,042
and now all I do is coachings.
1249
01:04:48,179 --> 01:04:49,111
Coachings?
1250
01:04:50,948 --> 01:04:53,382
Like you just teach?
1251
01:04:54,786 --> 01:04:57,787
-[siren blaring]
-Yeah.
1252
01:04:57,789 --> 01:04:59,188
[gasps] 9-1-1 traced our calls.
1253
01:04:59,190 --> 01:05:00,890
We're saved!
1254
01:05:00,892 --> 01:05:02,224
[Flynn shouting]
1255
01:05:14,839 --> 01:05:15,705
[canoe rattling]
1256
01:05:15,707 --> 01:05:17,139
[Jack grunting]
1257
01:05:17,141 --> 01:05:18,474
[women screaming]
1258
01:05:18,476 --> 01:05:20,142
[wheelbarrow rattling]
1259
01:05:20,144 --> 01:05:22,812
[women shouting]
1260
01:05:22,814 --> 01:05:24,480
Fuckin' no way.
1261
01:05:26,751 --> 01:05:27,917
[Flynn screaming]
1262
01:05:28,219 --> 01:05:30,386
-Officer, stop.
-What the fuck?
1263
01:05:30,388 --> 01:05:32,722
Arrest her. She's been trying
to stop this wedding
1264
01:05:32,724 --> 01:05:34,256
by killing my son.
1265
01:05:34,258 --> 01:05:35,858
And she's in on it, too.
1266
01:05:36,928 --> 01:05:38,828
Mia, do you just hurt you,
are you all right?
1267
01:05:38,830 --> 01:05:40,196
Paulette's part
of the conspiracy.
1268
01:05:40,198 --> 01:05:41,797
[Jack] Hey,
have you guys seen Dalvero?
1269
01:05:41,799 --> 01:05:44,734
-Oh, I'm so sorry.
-What?
1270
01:05:44,736 --> 01:05:47,103
Officer, this woman
locked me in the freezer
1271
01:05:47,105 --> 01:05:48,504
at gluten-free knife point
1272
01:05:48,506 --> 01:05:51,907
and has invented a child
to mask her own insecurities.
1273
01:05:51,909 --> 01:05:54,944
[clapping]
You guys, it's not one of us.
1274
01:05:54,946 --> 01:05:56,812
We saw the killer.
I knocked him out.
1275
01:05:56,814 --> 01:05:57,880
Why are you so sorry?
1276
01:06:02,153 --> 01:06:03,819
-Oh my fucking God.
-Now you three stand back
away from the vehicle.
1277
01:06:05,123 --> 01:06:08,257
Oh my God. Mia, he has a gun.
1278
01:06:08,259 --> 01:06:12,495
And who the fuck are you?
Because you are certainly
not an officer of the law.
1279
01:06:12,497 --> 01:06:14,497
Please step away
from the vehicle
1280
01:06:15,099 --> 01:06:16,866
and hand over your weapon.
1281
01:06:21,072 --> 01:06:21,937
[gun firing]
1282
01:06:21,939 --> 01:06:23,439
[lively dance music]
1283
01:06:23,441 --> 01:06:28,477
[man] You have the right
to remain sexy.
1284
01:06:28,479 --> 01:06:30,880
Oh shit, Magical Michael?
1285
01:06:32,049 --> 01:06:33,449
Sorry, guys, my bad.
1286
01:06:33,451 --> 01:06:35,985
He was supposed
to be here hours ago.
1287
01:06:35,987 --> 01:06:37,353
This place is hard to find.
1288
01:06:38,156 --> 01:06:40,556
I'm sorry, Mia, I didn't
know you were so against
1289
01:06:40,558 --> 01:06:42,124
the exploitation of men.
1290
01:06:42,360 --> 01:06:44,260
But don't you
think after a millennia
1291
01:06:44,262 --> 01:06:47,129
of the exploitation of women,
we should get our turn?
1292
01:06:47,131 --> 01:06:49,098
Is that what this is about,
1293
01:06:49,100 --> 01:06:51,934
an anti-marriage
feminist reprisal?
1294
01:06:51,936 --> 01:06:54,837
-I should probably go.
-Hey, I already
paid for this online.
1295
01:06:54,839 --> 01:06:56,138
[Michael] Yeah, not for
whatever the fuck this is.
1296
01:06:56,140 --> 01:06:57,807
No, no.
1297
01:06:58,843 --> 01:07:01,076
We need a third party
to settle this.
1298
01:07:01,979 --> 01:07:04,246
And how the fuck
do you turn that off?
1299
01:07:04,248 --> 01:07:06,015
[Michael] Just a few more times.
1300
01:07:06,017 --> 01:07:07,149
Go for the full routine.
1301
01:07:07,151 --> 01:07:09,118
[man] Officer down to funk.
1302
01:07:09,120 --> 01:07:10,386
[gun firing]
1303
01:07:10,388 --> 01:07:12,822
[siren blaring]
1304
01:07:12,824 --> 01:07:13,823
Spread 'em.
1305
01:07:16,427 --> 01:07:18,928
No, no one leaves.
1306
01:07:18,930 --> 01:07:21,263
[Flynn] I need to get to my son!
1307
01:07:21,265 --> 01:07:23,065
Who doesn't exist!
1308
01:07:23,067 --> 01:07:24,233
She's the killer.
1309
01:07:24,235 --> 01:07:25,501
[Jack] No, it's Trask.
1310
01:07:25,503 --> 01:07:28,304
-What?
-I saw him raping Paulette.
1311
01:07:29,440 --> 01:07:32,942
No, that was consensual
1312
01:07:32,944 --> 01:07:35,010
and there wasn't
really any penetration.
1313
01:07:35,012 --> 01:07:37,413
I know he didn't kill Dalvero.
1314
01:07:37,415 --> 01:07:39,014
I didn't mean to but--
1315
01:07:39,016 --> 01:07:41,584
He was attacking us with a mask.
1316
01:07:41,586 --> 01:07:43,319
She didn't do it.
1317
01:07:43,321 --> 01:07:44,320
[crying]
1318
01:07:44,322 --> 01:07:45,487
No fucking way!
1319
01:07:45,489 --> 01:07:46,589
[fabric ripping]
1320
01:07:46,591 --> 01:07:48,057
She didn't-- No.
1321
01:07:48,059 --> 01:07:49,592
[Eileen] Our lives
are in danger.
1322
01:07:49,594 --> 01:07:51,994
-I paid for 35 minutes.
-[fabric ripping]
1323
01:07:52,630 --> 01:07:54,630
[siren blaring]
1324
01:08:01,339 --> 01:08:02,471
[gun firing]
1325
01:08:02,473 --> 01:08:06,542
-[dramatic music]
-[horn blaring]
1326
01:08:06,544 --> 01:08:07,943
Can we all just talk about this?
1327
01:08:07,945 --> 01:08:09,345
[message alert beeping]
1328
01:08:09,347 --> 01:08:17,086
-[message alert dings]
-[Instagram] Magic4hire
posted to #MiaCampWedding.
1329
01:08:17,088 --> 01:08:19,421
[ominous music]
1330
01:08:19,423 --> 01:08:21,156
Everyone follow me.
1331
01:08:24,462 --> 01:08:27,129
[eerie music]
1332
01:08:42,046 --> 01:08:44,179
Inspect the body.
1333
01:08:44,181 --> 01:08:46,415
I bet you've been building
up your tolerance for years
1334
01:08:46,417 --> 01:08:50,419
just to seem like an alki loser
all the while just waiting--
1335
01:08:50,421 --> 01:08:52,454
Just do it.
1336
01:09:08,572 --> 01:09:10,539
Does anyone see a gunshot wound?
1337
01:09:13,077 --> 01:09:14,710
This is some JFK shit.
1338
01:09:15,646 --> 01:09:17,713
JFK's wound was pretty visible.
1339
01:09:17,715 --> 01:09:20,516
I fired a warning shot
into the air.
1340
01:09:22,553 --> 01:09:23,485
This is weird.
1341
01:09:25,122 --> 01:09:26,588
Maybe the same thing
happened to Dalvero.
1342
01:09:26,590 --> 01:09:28,090
I didn't kick him that hard.
1343
01:09:28,726 --> 01:09:30,559
Do the selfies mean you're dead?
1344
01:09:35,333 --> 01:09:37,266
I should have texted him.
1345
01:09:37,268 --> 01:09:42,104
Adorable but people are
dying without visible injuries.
1346
01:09:42,373 --> 01:09:44,506
Alexis didn't have any either.
1347
01:09:44,508 --> 01:09:46,141
You found Alexis?
1348
01:09:46,310 --> 01:09:49,311
I got a text from a 510 number
and it said,
1349
01:09:50,448 --> 01:09:53,682
"Don't tell anyone and hide
the body or there'll be more."
1350
01:09:55,319 --> 01:09:57,419
Wait, you never
gave me your phone number
1351
01:09:57,421 --> 01:10:00,422
for the contact sheet
and Dalvero has a 510 number
1352
01:10:00,424 --> 01:10:02,558
from Berkeley and
you probably do, too.
1353
01:10:03,561 --> 01:10:08,197
I got the same exact text
after Trask croaked
1354
01:10:08,199 --> 01:10:12,067
on top of me
except from a 617 number.
1355
01:10:12,069 --> 01:10:13,736
Aren't you
originally from Boston, Mia?
1356
01:10:13,738 --> 01:10:16,472
No, Eileen texted me,
"You're next,"
1357
01:10:16,474 --> 01:10:18,674
and she's the one
with the Polaroid camera.
1358
01:10:18,676 --> 01:10:20,242
I don't have your number.
1359
01:10:20,244 --> 01:10:21,744
We all got the contact sheet.
1360
01:10:22,780 --> 01:10:25,080
[scoffs] I'm not that organized.
1361
01:10:25,082 --> 01:10:27,082
Someone must've
hacked our numbers.
1362
01:10:27,385 --> 01:10:28,650
You work in tech now.
1363
01:10:29,253 --> 01:10:30,452
You Googled me?
1364
01:10:31,789 --> 01:10:33,455
Caught your LinkedIn request.
1365
01:10:33,457 --> 01:10:34,590
I work in social media.
1366
01:10:34,592 --> 01:10:36,025
[phone buzzing]
1367
01:10:36,027 --> 01:10:38,093
Well, did.
1368
01:10:38,095 --> 01:10:40,129
[eerie buzzing music]
1369
01:10:40,131 --> 01:10:41,096
I got fired.
1370
01:10:41,098 --> 01:10:43,065
[Michael groaning]
1371
01:10:43,067 --> 01:10:44,700
Jesus, fuck!
1372
01:10:44,702 --> 01:10:46,468
[Mia] Oh, oh, oh.
1373
01:10:46,470 --> 01:10:48,203
-Oh shit.
-[phone buzzing]
1374
01:10:48,205 --> 01:10:49,571
I swear he didn't have a pulse.
1375
01:10:49,573 --> 01:10:51,106
I don't think he's alive.
1376
01:10:52,043 --> 01:10:54,043
-This is supernatural.
-[phone buzzing]
1377
01:10:54,045 --> 01:10:56,111
Oh, that explains everything.
1378
01:10:56,113 --> 01:10:58,180
The paranormal
always explains everything.
1379
01:10:58,182 --> 01:11:00,749
He probably just got
knocked out, came to, and--
1380
01:11:00,751 --> 01:11:03,752
Is really engrossed
in a "New Yorker" article?
1381
01:11:03,754 --> 01:11:09,525
Mia, I did a background search
on the camp and all of
the permits were expired.
1382
01:11:09,527 --> 01:11:13,729
-Did you book it or
are we just trespassing?
-I am not that cheap.
1383
01:11:13,731 --> 01:11:17,166
And if they are out of date,
I'm going to ask Miriam
for a discount.
1384
01:11:17,168 --> 01:11:18,500
Who's Miriam?
1385
01:11:18,502 --> 01:11:20,536
The Airbnb contact for the camp.
1386
01:11:21,505 --> 01:11:25,140
And the name of the girl
who was struck by
lightning and drowned?
1387
01:11:25,142 --> 01:11:31,580
-Convenient.
-You think that she's capable
of being behind all of this?
1388
01:11:34,485 --> 01:11:39,221
Shit, that's her last name
and her profile picture
was the camp sign.
1389
01:11:39,223 --> 01:11:41,290
[scary music]
1390
01:11:41,292 --> 01:11:44,093
-I've seen that Walkman.
-[phone buzzing]
1391
01:11:44,095 --> 01:11:46,829
Her spirit is probably
entrancing through his phone
1392
01:11:46,831 --> 01:11:48,797
and made him a slave.
1393
01:11:48,799 --> 01:11:51,800
Maybe if you take it away,
it'll sever the tie.
1394
01:11:51,802 --> 01:11:53,869
Because you've seen
this kind of thing before?
1395
01:11:53,871 --> 01:11:57,506
Well, no, but I manage
paranormally.com's web presence
1396
01:11:57,508 --> 01:11:59,441
and, well, did.
1397
01:11:59,443 --> 01:12:01,243
Are you going to do it?
1398
01:12:01,245 --> 01:12:02,644
[Eileen]
Uh, he looks pretty strong.
1399
01:12:02,646 --> 01:12:05,614
Yeah, I'm not going to try it,
not in this.
1400
01:12:05,616 --> 01:12:07,549
I say we all just
pile in Dalvero's car
1401
01:12:07,551 --> 01:12:08,650
and get the fuck out of here.
1402
01:12:08,652 --> 01:12:10,352
But if this works on him,
1403
01:12:10,354 --> 01:12:12,154
maybe we could
save everyone else.
1404
01:12:13,524 --> 01:12:14,523
Okay.
1405
01:12:14,525 --> 01:12:16,325
Okay, go for it.
1406
01:12:16,327 --> 01:12:18,527
-Oh oh.
-[phone buzzing]
1407
01:12:18,529 --> 01:12:21,296
-[explosion booming]
-[all screaming]
1408
01:12:21,832 --> 01:12:24,766
[Instagram message alert dings]
Jack1138 posted
to #MiaCampWedding.
1409
01:12:24,768 --> 01:12:26,768
[panting] Dalvero's car
sounds pretty good about now.
1410
01:12:26,770 --> 01:12:28,337
[Instagram] #MiaCampWedding.
1411
01:12:28,339 --> 01:12:30,272
[eerie piercing music]
1412
01:12:30,274 --> 01:12:31,874
[Eileen] Oh ho!
1413
01:12:31,876 --> 01:12:33,842
-[all shouting]
-[Paulette] Follow me!
1414
01:12:38,182 --> 01:12:39,815
[Mia] Shouldn't we
throw our phones away
so we don't get zombied?
1415
01:12:39,817 --> 01:12:42,918
[Eileen] If grabbing
one's phone is stealing,
1416
01:12:42,920 --> 01:12:45,354
maybe tossing
our phones is littering.
1417
01:12:45,356 --> 01:12:46,889
We should leave where?
1418
01:12:46,891 --> 01:12:50,425
Fuck that! That bitch lured
us here by the Airbnb
1419
01:12:50,427 --> 01:12:54,263
because she obviously
has some unfinished business
1420
01:12:54,265 --> 01:12:56,899
that she'd clearly
like us to help her resolve.
1421
01:12:56,901 --> 01:12:58,534
Then why is she
killing everyone?
1422
01:12:58,536 --> 01:13:00,936
Dead weight, you think
they could've helped her?
1423
01:13:00,938 --> 01:13:01,904
Shit.
1424
01:13:01,906 --> 01:13:04,907
[dramatic music]
1425
01:13:06,277 --> 01:13:08,710
[all panting]
1426
01:13:08,712 --> 01:13:09,778
Where's Flynn?
1427
01:13:09,780 --> 01:13:11,246
She can knock.
1428
01:13:11,248 --> 01:13:12,648
We can't just
leave her out there.
1429
01:13:12,650 --> 01:13:14,216
She's safer than in here.
1430
01:13:14,218 --> 01:13:15,918
What are you trying to do,
1431
01:13:16,320 --> 01:13:19,221
trap us in the
smallest room on the planet?
1432
01:13:20,257 --> 01:13:22,391
Oh my God, oh my God.
1433
01:13:22,393 --> 01:13:24,860
[giggle]
1434
01:13:24,862 --> 01:13:26,562
[Paulette]
That's why we're in here.
1435
01:13:26,564 --> 01:13:27,796
Do you have the key?
1436
01:13:28,732 --> 01:13:29,598
[Paulette] Fuck me.
1437
01:13:29,600 --> 01:13:31,466
[ominous music]
1438
01:13:31,468 --> 01:13:33,335
[crickets chirping]
1439
01:13:35,673 --> 01:13:37,706
-[message alert beeping]
-[Mia] Where are you?
1440
01:13:37,708 --> 01:13:40,409
-We're trapped.
-[eerie music]
1441
01:13:41,512 --> 01:13:44,880
-[message alert beeping]
-[Eileen] Leave now
and Mia's toast.
1442
01:13:44,882 --> 01:13:49,952
[message alerts beeping]
1443
01:13:51,889 --> 01:13:56,258
[multiple voices overlapping]
You're next!
1444
01:13:58,862 --> 01:14:01,296
[siren blaring]
1445
01:14:01,298 --> 01:14:05,267
[Mia] Would be amazingly
lucky if we just found the key.
1446
01:14:05,269 --> 01:14:06,501
Oh my God.
1447
01:14:06,503 --> 01:14:07,436
[Mia] What?
1448
01:14:07,438 --> 01:14:11,440
"Dare you to steal
Yolanda's Cabbage Patch Kid
1449
01:14:11,442 --> 01:14:12,874
and hang it."
1450
01:14:12,876 --> 01:14:15,611
[chuckles] Kids at
this camp were brutal.
1451
01:14:15,613 --> 01:14:16,845
You think it's inside.
1452
01:14:17,915 --> 01:14:18,880
[Paulette] Cover your ears.
1453
01:14:18,882 --> 01:14:20,315
-Oh God.
-What the fuck?
1454
01:14:21,352 --> 01:14:23,418
[GPS] Continue
toward state route,
1455
01:14:23,420 --> 01:14:27,689
make a U-turn,
make a U-turn or you're next,
1456
01:14:27,691 --> 01:14:29,558
-you're next, you're next.
-Shut the fuck up.
1457
01:14:29,560 --> 01:14:30,492
Shut up.
1458
01:14:30,494 --> 01:14:32,561
[GPS] You were warned a lot.
1459
01:14:32,563 --> 01:14:34,296
-[dramatic eerie music]
-[gun firing]
1460
01:14:34,298 --> 01:14:36,965
-[scary music]
-[crickets chirping]
1461
01:14:36,967 --> 01:14:38,967
[toys clattering]
1462
01:14:38,969 --> 01:14:41,303
-What the fuck?
-Uh!
1463
01:14:41,305 --> 01:14:42,004
[message alert dings]
1464
01:14:42,006 --> 01:14:43,005
[Mia] Ow.
1465
01:14:45,643 --> 01:14:48,377
[Instagram] GFreeAtLast
posted to #MiaCampWedding.
1466
01:14:49,046 --> 01:14:51,947
[eerie music]
1467
01:14:51,949 --> 01:14:53,582
I'm going to write
the email to tell everybody
1468
01:14:53,584 --> 01:14:55,484
to stay away from my wedding.
1469
01:14:56,620 --> 01:14:58,920
No, we can
get to the bottom of this
1470
01:14:58,922 --> 01:15:00,555
and exorcize everyone.
1471
01:15:00,557 --> 01:15:02,324
You could still have
the best wedding ever.
1472
01:15:02,326 --> 01:15:05,994
What? No!
Fucking scare everyone away
1473
01:15:05,996 --> 01:15:08,930
and like tell them
it was a fire or
something because I am here
1474
01:15:08,932 --> 01:15:11,600
and I can barely
believe this shit.
1475
01:15:11,602 --> 01:15:13,869
So you're just
going to give up and listen
1476
01:15:13,871 --> 01:15:15,537
to drowned girl's mix tape?
1477
01:15:15,539 --> 01:15:19,608
Nobody labels a mix tape
Camp Record Number One.
1478
01:15:19,610 --> 01:15:21,376
It's got to be something.
1479
01:15:21,378 --> 01:15:23,512
But we need to warn people
1480
01:15:23,514 --> 01:15:26,915
in case it's not
the best wedding ever, okay?
1481
01:15:26,917 --> 01:15:29,084
Anyone see the headphones?
1482
01:15:30,521 --> 01:15:31,553
Better idea.
1483
01:15:32,990 --> 01:15:34,690
So we can all hear.
1484
01:15:34,692 --> 01:15:35,857
[grunts] We're
going to need to find
1485
01:15:35,859 --> 01:15:37,793
a more defensible position.
1486
01:15:39,530 --> 01:15:40,595
We need to go to the playhouse.
1487
01:15:40,597 --> 01:15:41,930
Be prepared to run.
1488
01:15:41,932 --> 01:15:43,899
-[car rumbling]
-[ominous music]
1489
01:15:44,401 --> 01:15:46,935
-[door clattering]
-[Paulette panting]
1490
01:15:46,937 --> 01:15:48,837
-[phones buzzing]
-[men groaning]
1491
01:15:48,839 --> 01:15:50,572
Oh my God. Take shelter.
1492
01:15:51,775 --> 01:15:53,809
[Paulette grunting]
1493
01:15:54,111 --> 01:15:56,478
-Shit!
-Just drop and roll!
1494
01:15:56,747 --> 01:15:58,480
That is not
happening in this dress.
1495
01:15:58,482 --> 01:15:59,681
Rip it off.
1496
01:15:59,683 --> 01:16:01,883
I can't, it's too tight.
1497
01:16:03,354 --> 01:16:05,420
-[handcuffs clicking]
-Oh.
1498
01:16:06,023 --> 01:16:09,591
-[Paulette] Shit, come on!
-[Eileen] Gee, oh, go, go!
1499
01:16:11,695 --> 01:16:14,363
Damn, home girl's
got some mad skills.
1500
01:16:14,365 --> 01:16:16,565
Well, Dalvero said
she trained with the CIA
1501
01:16:16,567 --> 01:16:17,866
but she failed some test.
1502
01:16:17,868 --> 01:16:19,401
[Paulette] How's
that email coming?
1503
01:16:19,403 --> 01:16:20,068
[Mia grunting]
1504
01:16:20,070 --> 01:16:21,503
[Paulette panting]
1505
01:16:28,412 --> 01:16:29,378
[phone buzzing]
1506
01:16:29,380 --> 01:16:30,545
Shit, it's Alexis.
1507
01:16:31,749 --> 01:16:33,615
We could
barricade her with seating.
1508
01:16:33,617 --> 01:16:34,916
Good plan.
1509
01:16:34,918 --> 01:16:36,585
[chairs clattering]
1510
01:16:38,889 --> 01:16:41,857
-[crickets chirping]
-[phones buzzing]
1511
01:16:45,996 --> 01:16:46,962
[chain clinking]
1512
01:16:46,964 --> 01:16:49,631
[ominous music]
1513
01:17:03,113 --> 01:17:06,181
-[stick cracking]
-[tense music]
1514
01:17:12,556 --> 01:17:15,524
[suspenseful music]
1515
01:17:15,526 --> 01:17:17,426
Gore found this
while we were setting up.
1516
01:17:20,597 --> 01:17:22,197
[ominous music]
1517
01:17:22,199 --> 01:17:25,066
Yeah, that would've
been a red flag for me.
1518
01:17:25,436 --> 01:17:26,701
Oh my gosh.
1519
01:17:26,703 --> 01:17:28,537
Look who's on top of the board.
1520
01:17:29,840 --> 01:17:32,707
The last camp director
was this psych grad student
1521
01:17:32,709 --> 01:17:35,477
who, according to
this very creepy website,
1522
01:17:35,479 --> 01:17:36,778
pitted the kids
against each other
1523
01:17:36,780 --> 01:17:38,747
through some
like disciplinary game.
1524
01:17:38,749 --> 01:17:41,750
We've got to save her
from his ghost.
1525
01:17:41,752 --> 01:17:44,619
You break a rule and,
bam, you're on the board.
1526
01:17:44,621 --> 01:17:47,489
Mmm, but we all
broke camp rules.
1527
01:17:47,491 --> 01:17:51,059
I did. I drank, did drugs,
I had sex, well kind of.
1528
01:17:51,061 --> 01:17:53,195
Yeah, and the camp
director's not dead.
1529
01:17:54,565 --> 01:17:56,064
Well, fuck.
1530
01:17:56,500 --> 01:17:57,833
Let's play the tape.
1531
01:17:57,835 --> 01:17:58,767
Oh yeah.
1532
01:17:59,770 --> 01:18:00,969
[Eileen sighs]
1533
01:18:02,206 --> 01:18:04,039
[lively music]
1534
01:18:04,041 --> 01:18:07,809
¶ Don't toy with me to love ¶
1535
01:18:07,811 --> 01:18:10,612
[tense music]
1536
01:18:18,689 --> 01:18:20,956
[man]
To live a life free of sin,
1537
01:18:20,958 --> 01:18:23,592
it is not enough
to follow the rules.
1538
01:18:24,027 --> 01:18:27,229
The moral and just answers
to life's difficult questions
1539
01:18:27,231 --> 01:18:30,665
lie within you and you found
ways to ignore and twist them,
1540
01:18:30,667 --> 01:18:33,869
to serve your
selfish desires but deep down,
1541
01:18:33,871 --> 01:18:36,571
you know what is correct.
1542
01:18:36,573 --> 01:18:41,009
James 4:17, "If you do
not do what you know is right,
1543
01:18:41,011 --> 01:18:45,614
you have sinned."
Now, excuse me,
is that a tape recorder?
1544
01:18:45,616 --> 01:18:48,583
[Miriam] Director McFuffer,
my parents said
I had an exception.
1545
01:18:48,585 --> 01:18:51,953
I record everything
so I can study it later
and get it perfect.
1546
01:18:51,955 --> 01:18:55,023
[director] There are no
exemptions at Camp Pocumtuck.
1547
01:18:55,025 --> 01:18:57,726
Electronic devices
will not be tolerated.
1548
01:18:58,161 --> 01:19:00,262
Your parents
warned me about your lies.
1549
01:19:00,264 --> 01:19:02,597
Your selfish desire has twisted
1550
01:19:02,599 --> 01:19:04,733
-your moral truth.
-[tomahawk whacking]
1551
01:19:04,735 --> 01:19:09,771
That's makes you our first
addition to the Board of Sin.
1552
01:19:09,773 --> 01:19:13,141
If you do not do
what you know is right,
1553
01:19:13,143 --> 01:19:16,077
your picture goes up here.
What's your name?
1554
01:19:16,079 --> 01:19:18,213
[Miriam] But I'm not lying.
They told me that--
1555
01:19:18,215 --> 01:19:20,081
[director] What's your name?
1556
01:19:20,851 --> 01:19:22,584
Miriam Kleingeist, sir.
1557
01:19:23,020 --> 01:19:24,753
[director] Step up here, Miriam.
1558
01:19:24,755 --> 01:19:26,755
[camera clicking and whirring]
1559
01:19:26,924 --> 01:19:29,724
The only way to
get off the Board of Sin
1560
01:19:29,726 --> 01:19:31,626
is to report a sin.
1561
01:19:31,628 --> 01:19:33,795
What the Nazi Germany fuck?
1562
01:19:33,797 --> 01:19:37,666
-[director] Do you have
a sin to report, Miriam?
-No, sir.
1563
01:19:37,668 --> 01:19:41,603
How does he expect to police
the reporting of other's sins
1564
01:19:41,605 --> 01:19:45,206
especially when the incentive
is so high to report
a false sin?
1565
01:19:45,208 --> 01:19:49,210
[director] Reports of false sin
just to get off the Board of
Sin, is the gravest sin of all
1566
01:19:49,212 --> 01:19:53,715
-and God will tell me
if you do something so heinous.
-[Miriam crying]
1567
01:19:53,717 --> 01:19:56,051
Stop it, stop it, stop it!
1568
01:19:57,020 --> 01:20:00,021
Miriam, I'll need
to be confiscating that.
1569
01:20:02,359 --> 01:20:07,629
So everybody who was
zombied just didn't do
1570
01:20:07,631 --> 01:20:09,097
what they knew was right?
1571
01:20:09,933 --> 01:20:10,966
-[keypad clicking]
-[tense music]
1572
01:20:10,968 --> 01:20:11,933
[Alexis voiceover] Yep.
1573
01:20:11,935 --> 01:20:14,035
-[eerie music]
-[camera clicking and whirring]
1574
01:20:14,037 --> 01:20:17,072
Cheating, okay sure.
1575
01:20:17,074 --> 01:20:20,976
But man of honor fail,
unprofessional.
1576
01:20:20,978 --> 01:20:23,111
I don't know, that stripper,
man, he could have saved us
1577
01:20:23,113 --> 01:20:25,313
but he decided to save
his own ass instead.
1578
01:20:25,315 --> 01:20:26,982
And also
Gore forgot the grapefruits.
1579
01:20:26,984 --> 01:20:29,050
I highly doubt it
was the grapefruits.
1580
01:20:29,052 --> 01:20:31,920
He probably got an
ultimatum text just like Trask
1581
01:20:31,922 --> 01:20:36,758
and even he had to know
that cheating on his wife
to get VP is just,
1582
01:20:36,760 --> 01:20:38,660
-you know, fucked up.
-[thudding music]
1583
01:20:39,730 --> 01:20:40,996
Wait a flippin' second.
1584
01:20:41,665 --> 01:20:44,132
[tense music]
1585
01:20:47,037 --> 01:20:49,738
It wasn't the camp
director that pitted the kids
1586
01:20:49,740 --> 01:20:51,206
against each other.
1587
01:20:51,208 --> 01:20:52,641
It was the drowned girl.
1588
01:20:52,643 --> 01:20:54,409
She needed a sin to report
1589
01:20:54,411 --> 01:20:56,778
-to get off the board.
-[thudding music]
1590
01:20:56,780 --> 01:21:00,181
But she reported like six sins
and she's still on the board.
1591
01:21:00,183 --> 01:21:03,385
[sighs] Because the
religion Nazi camp director
1592
01:21:03,387 --> 01:21:05,086
has to approve it.
1593
01:21:06,256 --> 01:21:09,290
We need to open up
a channel to her spirit
1594
01:21:09,292 --> 01:21:11,126
and then call
the camp director--
1595
01:21:11,128 --> 01:21:13,294
But the camp
director is in prison
1596
01:21:13,296 --> 01:21:15,030
according to the website.
1597
01:21:15,265 --> 01:21:19,701
Well, all that matters
is that she believes it.
1598
01:21:19,703 --> 01:21:22,137
One of us can pretend
we're the camp director
1599
01:21:22,139 --> 01:21:24,406
and let her know
she's off the hook.
1600
01:21:24,408 --> 01:21:26,307
Or we could pretend to be God
1601
01:21:26,309 --> 01:21:28,209
and tell her to go to hell.
1602
01:21:28,211 --> 01:21:30,345
How hard is it
to open a channel?
1603
01:21:31,214 --> 01:21:33,748
WikiHow, don't fail me now.
1604
01:21:33,750 --> 01:21:36,718
[phones buzzing]
1605
01:21:38,388 --> 01:21:41,256
Circle of salts, silver amulets,
1606
01:21:41,258 --> 01:21:43,792
blessed prayer shawls, serpents?
1607
01:21:43,794 --> 01:21:45,293
Where are we going
to source all this stuff?
1608
01:21:45,295 --> 01:21:46,995
We can improvise.
1609
01:21:46,997 --> 01:21:49,864
In the spirit realm,
it's the thought that counts.
1610
01:21:49,866 --> 01:21:51,733
Is that real or
a Tweet you wrote?
1611
01:21:51,735 --> 01:21:53,034
[Eileen sighs]
1612
01:21:53,036 --> 01:21:58,273
-[dramatic tense music]
-[phones buzzing]
1613
01:22:03,880 --> 01:22:04,846
[pills rattling]
1614
01:22:12,923 --> 01:22:15,790
[phones buzzing]
1615
01:22:22,232 --> 01:22:25,200
[Trask grunting]
1616
01:22:25,202 --> 01:22:26,768
[tomahawk thudding]
1617
01:22:26,770 --> 01:22:29,838
[Eileen grunting]
1618
01:22:32,976 --> 01:22:34,843
[phones buzzing]
1619
01:22:43,754 --> 01:22:45,487
-[scary tinkling music]
-Attention, there is
1620
01:22:45,489 --> 01:22:48,757
a dangerous, toxic gas
leak near the wedding venue
1621
01:22:48,759 --> 01:22:50,191
and we must postpone.
1622
01:22:50,193 --> 01:22:53,228
Please, for your safety,
stay away from the camp.
1623
01:22:53,230 --> 01:22:54,996
We have all been evacuated.
1624
01:22:54,998 --> 01:22:57,766
I am so sorry for this
last-minute cancellation.
1625
01:22:57,768 --> 01:23:00,769
Love, Mia and Dalvero,
#MiaCampWedding.
1626
01:23:04,174 --> 01:23:05,206
[ominous music]
1627
01:23:05,208 --> 01:23:08,009
[phone buzzing]
1628
01:23:14,417 --> 01:23:17,185
Oh God, gluten-free
almost tomahawked me.
1629
01:23:17,954 --> 01:23:19,988
Did you find any prayer shawls?
1630
01:23:20,123 --> 01:23:21,790
They didn't do
"Fiddler on the Roof".
1631
01:23:21,792 --> 01:23:23,792
It's okay, I got backup.
1632
01:23:23,794 --> 01:23:27,028
[panting] First, I need
to smudge the whole place.
1633
01:23:27,164 --> 01:23:28,096
You guys can set up the altar.
1634
01:23:28,098 --> 01:23:30,231
[Paulette] I
thought I was smudging.
1635
01:23:30,534 --> 01:23:32,367
Who needs to chill the fuck out?
1636
01:23:33,804 --> 01:23:38,039
-[crickets chirping]
-[dramatic drumming music]
1637
01:23:38,041 --> 01:23:39,307
Does that count?
1638
01:23:39,309 --> 01:23:40,975
It's herbal.
1639
01:23:40,977 --> 01:23:42,477
[spray hissing]
1640
01:23:43,280 --> 01:23:44,546
Where's the salt?
1641
01:23:45,048 --> 01:23:45,947
Use the Bloody Eight.
1642
01:23:45,949 --> 01:23:47,482
It's loaded with sodium.
1643
01:23:48,251 --> 01:23:49,851
[spray hissing]
1644
01:23:49,853 --> 01:23:51,886
[Mia] Who has a serpent?
1645
01:23:51,888 --> 01:23:53,454
Uh, they're
fertility symbols, so--
1646
01:23:53,456 --> 01:23:55,156
[Eileen] Use the
prenatal vitamins.
1647
01:23:55,425 --> 01:23:59,227
-[tomahawk thudding]
-[phones buzzing]
1648
01:23:59,229 --> 01:24:00,528
We need to barricade the door.
1649
01:24:02,465 --> 01:24:03,665
[Eileen exhaling deeply]
1650
01:24:03,666 --> 01:24:04,866
-[phone buzzing]
-[zombie groaning]
1651
01:24:06,002 --> 01:24:08,136
[Eileen] Put these on
and really treat them
1652
01:24:08,138 --> 01:24:09,437
like sacred garments.
1653
01:24:11,441 --> 01:24:13,441
[mysterious music]
1654
01:24:13,443 --> 01:24:16,344
Now form a crescent
around the idol.
1655
01:24:19,883 --> 01:24:20,615
Oh.
1656
01:24:25,856 --> 01:24:28,623
[Eileen] Present the sacred
object of the spirit
1657
01:24:28,625 --> 01:24:29,591
to the idol.
1658
01:24:37,200 --> 01:24:39,601
Now we hold hands and
chant something of meaning.
1659
01:24:44,875 --> 01:24:47,108
And what the fuck would that be?
1660
01:24:48,245 --> 01:24:50,211
Shit, look.
1661
01:24:53,617 --> 01:24:54,916
What's the tune?
1662
01:24:54,918 --> 01:24:55,917
[door clattering]
1663
01:24:55,919 --> 01:24:58,419
[tense music]
1664
01:24:58,421 --> 01:25:00,255
I don't know, I'll improvise.
Just follow me.
1665
01:25:01,224 --> 01:25:05,593
¶ We are the kids of Pocumtuck¶
1666
01:25:05,595 --> 01:25:08,663
¶ Best camp in the world ¶
1667
01:25:08,665 --> 01:25:10,565
Did you go to camp?
1668
01:25:11,568 --> 01:25:12,533
Maybe folk it up a bit.
1669
01:25:14,404 --> 01:25:17,405
¶ We are the kids
From Pocumtuck ¶
1670
01:25:17,407 --> 01:25:20,608
¶ Best camp in the world ¶
1671
01:25:20,610 --> 01:25:23,044
Come on, we have to do this
together or it won't work.
1672
01:25:23,046 --> 01:25:28,216
Exactly.
And how am I supposed to
believe that this is sacred?
1673
01:25:28,919 --> 01:25:30,652
What do you need to believe?
1674
01:25:33,390 --> 01:25:35,089
Don't even touch it.
1675
01:25:35,091 --> 01:25:36,190
-[zombie groaning]
-[Eileen sighing]
1676
01:25:36,192 --> 01:25:38,259
It's not a bad idea.
1677
01:25:39,429 --> 01:25:41,062
You can sew it back together.
1678
01:25:41,064 --> 01:25:43,031
It's not like it fits.
1679
01:25:43,433 --> 01:25:46,668
-[tomahawk thudding]
-[tense music]
1680
01:25:48,271 --> 01:25:49,671
You slept with Dalvero.
1681
01:25:49,673 --> 01:25:51,205
Oh my God,
we're going to do this now?
1682
01:25:51,207 --> 01:25:52,941
While we were together.
1683
01:25:52,943 --> 01:25:53,975
He told me.
1684
01:25:53,977 --> 01:25:55,076
Did he?
1685
01:25:55,078 --> 01:25:57,445
Did you ever
think he made that up
1686
01:25:57,447 --> 01:26:00,014
to save face
because you told him
1687
01:26:00,016 --> 01:26:03,351
that you hooked up with some
guy on Memorial Day weekend?
1688
01:26:04,421 --> 01:26:06,054
We never had sex.
1689
01:26:06,056 --> 01:26:08,523
I told him that you
were the type of person
1690
01:26:08,525 --> 01:26:13,561
to snoop through his emails
and he didn't believe me.
1691
01:26:13,563 --> 01:26:16,397
So then he did the slow
fade from my life
1692
01:26:16,399 --> 01:26:19,634
and I guess forgot to
uninvite me to the wedding
1693
01:26:19,636 --> 01:26:24,172
because I'm his,
was his best friend.
1694
01:26:24,174 --> 01:26:26,474
I guess I didn't
encourage the friendship.
1695
01:26:26,476 --> 01:26:29,010
You think?
1696
01:26:29,012 --> 01:26:31,079
-[door clattering]
-[phones buzzing]
1697
01:26:37,187 --> 01:26:40,288
-[Mia grunting]
-[fabric ripping]
1698
01:26:46,396 --> 01:26:48,429
-[tomahawk thudding]
-[phones buzzing]
1699
01:26:48,431 --> 01:26:50,531
Let's do this shit,
motherfuckers.
1700
01:26:50,533 --> 01:26:52,400
-[sighs] Yeah.
-May I try the song?
1701
01:26:52,402 --> 01:26:53,334
Yes.
1702
01:26:54,738 --> 01:26:59,207
¶ We are the kids
From Camp Pocumtuck ¶
1703
01:26:59,209 --> 01:27:04,112
¶ Best camp in the world ¶
1704
01:27:04,114 --> 01:27:06,514
[Miriam]
¶ All the rest wish
They had our luck ¶
1705
01:27:06,516 --> 01:27:09,250
¶ When our flags unfurl ¶
1706
01:27:09,252 --> 01:27:12,687
-We're in.
-Who's gonna do the douche boy?
1707
01:27:12,689 --> 01:27:15,656
¶ They been pillaged
But God loves makin' peace ¶
1708
01:27:15,658 --> 01:27:17,625
-Miriam?
-¶ Drinking salvation ¶
1709
01:27:17,627 --> 01:27:19,794
-Miriam?
-Yeah?
1710
01:27:20,230 --> 01:27:22,697
Do you have a sin to report?
1711
01:27:23,433 --> 01:27:27,602
[laughs] Are you pretending
to be Director Mudfusher?
1712
01:27:27,604 --> 01:27:28,736
He's a butthole.
1713
01:27:28,738 --> 01:27:31,205
[laughing]
1714
01:27:32,375 --> 01:27:34,776
I reported tons of sins
and it's not working.
1715
01:27:34,778 --> 01:27:36,544
You have to help me
get to my parents.
1716
01:27:37,047 --> 01:27:40,114
Miriam, I know this
is going to be really hard
1717
01:27:40,116 --> 01:27:42,417
for you to understand
but you got struck by lightning
1718
01:27:42,419 --> 01:27:47,088
-and you didn't survive.
-No, duh.
1719
01:27:47,090 --> 01:27:49,157
-[door thudding]
-[zombies grunting]
1720
01:27:49,159 --> 01:27:50,425
Tell your minions to stand down.
1721
01:27:50,427 --> 01:27:52,427
I don't know how
to possess people.
1722
01:27:52,429 --> 01:27:55,129
-That's the pilgrim witch girls.
-[woman screaming]
1723
01:27:55,131 --> 01:27:57,698
They want more friends
to play their really,
boring games with.
1724
01:27:57,700 --> 01:27:59,467
[zombies groaning]
1725
01:28:00,270 --> 01:28:02,603
There are no one else
from the astral plane
1726
01:28:02,605 --> 01:28:05,306
that these pilgrim girls
can play with?
1727
01:28:05,308 --> 01:28:08,109
No one who died on the site
of an Indian massacre
1728
01:28:08,111 --> 01:28:09,811
and are trapped
in a liminal vortex.
1729
01:28:10,647 --> 01:28:12,313
You have to help me
get off the board
1730
01:28:12,315 --> 01:28:14,115
or your friends are goners.
1731
01:28:14,117 --> 01:28:16,350
-[furniture clattering]
-[phones buzzing]
1732
01:28:16,586 --> 01:28:18,519
Oh, no fucking duh.
1733
01:28:18,521 --> 01:28:20,388
We just have to get her
Polaroid off the board.
1734
01:28:20,390 --> 01:28:22,123
-[tomahawk thudding]
-That's cheating.
1735
01:28:22,125 --> 01:28:24,525
You can't shoot them,
they're kind of alive.
1736
01:28:24,527 --> 01:28:25,860
[Paulette] Even if
they're going to kill us?
1737
01:28:25,862 --> 01:28:27,361
You guys, butterfly nets.
1738
01:28:27,363 --> 01:28:29,430
[phones buzzing]
1739
01:28:30,100 --> 01:28:32,100
[zombie shouting]
1740
01:28:35,738 --> 01:28:38,840
-[Miriam] Mmm,
I wouldn't do that.
-Why the fuck not?
1741
01:28:38,842 --> 01:28:42,376
If you leave,
they'll probably just have
your friends kill themselves.
1742
01:28:42,378 --> 01:28:44,846
They only need them alive
to hunt the rest of you down.
1743
01:28:44,848 --> 01:28:48,149
-And you can't stop them?
-Not trapped in this thing.
1744
01:28:48,151 --> 01:28:50,551
But they need me to
connect with you guys
through your telephones.
1745
01:28:50,553 --> 01:28:53,788
-They don't get
technology at all.
-What are we going to do?
1746
01:28:53,790 --> 01:28:56,357
-Phones won't work in the water.
-No.
-Good idea.
1747
01:28:56,359 --> 01:28:58,726
No, no, no. I don't like
the lake. Stop, I'm scared!
1748
01:28:58,728 --> 01:29:01,129
They were so mean.
I just wrote the notes.
1749
01:29:01,131 --> 01:29:04,432
I didn't make 'em do anything.
I'd never been
in trouble before.
1750
01:29:04,434 --> 01:29:06,467
Did it ever occur to you
that maybe your parents
1751
01:29:06,469 --> 01:29:08,269
just didn't tell them
about the exemption?
1752
01:29:08,271 --> 01:29:11,472
Take me back to camp or
I'll report your sin right now.
1753
01:29:11,474 --> 01:29:12,907
What sin?
1754
01:29:12,909 --> 01:29:14,842
Lying.
You did sleep with Dalvero.
1755
01:29:14,844 --> 01:29:16,377
[dramatic music]
1756
01:29:16,379 --> 01:29:17,678
[Paulette] Do you have proof?
1757
01:29:17,680 --> 01:29:19,680
November 15th, 2008.
1758
01:29:19,682 --> 01:29:21,582
It's in your MS Word journal
and you wrote
1759
01:29:21,584 --> 01:29:23,184
-a lot of poetry about it.
-Wow.
1760
01:29:23,186 --> 01:29:25,153
I was just
starting to warm up to you.
1761
01:29:26,789 --> 01:29:30,725
It was undergrad
and I was a virgin
1762
01:29:30,727 --> 01:29:33,294
and I didn't tell him and
he freaked out midway through
1763
01:29:33,296 --> 01:29:37,632
so defining it as full-stop
sex is like a stretch, okay?
1764
01:29:40,203 --> 01:29:42,803
It was awkward and
then we became friends
1765
01:29:42,805 --> 01:29:47,842
and I have a hard time
making and keeping friends
1766
01:29:48,344 --> 01:29:50,778
so this wedding
felt like the death nail.
1767
01:29:50,780 --> 01:29:53,581
So sue me for not
being totally honest.
1768
01:29:54,918 --> 01:29:56,551
You lied, too.
1769
01:29:56,553 --> 01:29:57,618
Who?
1770
01:29:57,620 --> 01:29:58,686
Both of you.
1771
01:29:59,923 --> 01:30:00,888
[door thudding]
1772
01:30:00,890 --> 01:30:03,191
[dark eerie music]
1773
01:30:03,193 --> 01:30:06,661
[Paulette] No!
We can't help you if we're dead.
1774
01:30:06,663 --> 01:30:09,363
-[dramatic music]
-[phone buzzing]
1775
01:30:09,365 --> 01:30:10,364
[Mia] Oh!
1776
01:30:15,939 --> 01:30:17,672
[zombies groaning]
1777
01:30:18,775 --> 01:30:20,341
We could swim.
1778
01:30:20,476 --> 01:30:22,276
[tense music]
1779
01:30:22,278 --> 01:30:23,711
Oh, that's why
you failed Quantico.
1780
01:30:23,713 --> 01:30:24,645
It's a phobia.
1781
01:30:25,548 --> 01:30:27,348
Miriam, I have a sin to report.
1782
01:30:27,350 --> 01:30:28,716
You don't have to trick anyone.
1783
01:30:28,718 --> 01:30:30,318
Maybe that'll
get you off the board.
1784
01:30:30,320 --> 01:30:31,252
What?
1785
01:30:31,254 --> 01:30:35,923
Mia, I knew
the email was a mistake
1786
01:30:35,925 --> 01:30:40,661
-but I wanted to
force a fren-a-ssance.
-Um...
1787
01:30:40,663 --> 01:30:43,664
And exploit your opera fame
to get my career back on track.
1788
01:30:44,601 --> 01:30:47,335
But I really think we connected
and not because
you're just teaching.
1789
01:30:47,770 --> 01:30:49,937
But I knew the right
thing to do was to ask you
1790
01:30:49,939 --> 01:30:52,773
if it was a mistake
and I didn't.
1791
01:30:54,510 --> 01:30:55,710
Sinner.
1792
01:30:55,712 --> 01:30:58,546
[ominous music]
1793
01:31:01,651 --> 01:31:02,850
-[zombies groaning]
-[phones buzzing]
1794
01:31:02,852 --> 01:31:05,419
Fuck, it didn't work.
1795
01:31:05,421 --> 01:31:07,521
Maybe you all have to do it?
1796
01:31:09,459 --> 01:31:12,493
Uh, I didn't send the stay
away from the wedding email.
1797
01:31:13,463 --> 01:31:17,465
Seriously? Do you just want
your friends and family
to show up to this shit storm
1798
01:31:17,467 --> 01:31:19,967
in case we pull off an
eight-way exorcism. Oh my God.
1799
01:31:19,969 --> 01:31:22,737
So this isn't
just my wedding, okay?
1800
01:31:24,907 --> 01:31:27,742
It's an audition for a
wedding-planning position
at Bride Boheme.
1801
01:31:29,445 --> 01:31:32,880
My opera career is over.
Okay, fine,
it never even started.
1802
01:31:32,882 --> 01:31:35,583
I just started lying
about it on social media but...
1803
01:31:37,920 --> 01:31:39,920
I have to do
something with my life.
1804
01:31:40,990 --> 01:31:42,923
I can't just be somebody's wife.
1805
01:31:45,762 --> 01:31:46,694
Wow.
1806
01:31:48,298 --> 01:31:49,830
Send the fucking email!
1807
01:31:51,868 --> 01:31:53,801
-[email whooshing]
-[ominous music]
1808
01:31:53,803 --> 01:31:55,836
-[zombies groaning]
-[phones buzzing]
1809
01:31:55,838 --> 01:31:57,038
What more do we have to do?
1810
01:31:57,040 --> 01:31:59,540
I, I cannot die!
1811
01:31:59,542 --> 01:32:02,643
Oh, duh, full ceremony.
1812
01:32:02,645 --> 01:32:03,577
What?
1813
01:32:05,448 --> 01:32:06,380
No, no, no.
1814
01:32:08,618 --> 01:32:09,784
[Eileen] Say cheese.
1815
01:32:10,019 --> 01:32:11,952
-[Paulette grunting]
-[camera clicking]
1816
01:32:11,954 --> 01:32:13,487
-[phones buzzing]
-[zombies groaning]
1817
01:32:13,489 --> 01:32:15,956
[ominous music]
1818
01:32:15,958 --> 01:32:17,558
We could still swim.
1819
01:32:17,794 --> 01:32:20,928
Miriam forced Paulette's sin
out of her, but not yours.
1820
01:32:20,930 --> 01:32:22,530
-No, no, no! Fuck.
-[dramatic music]
1821
01:32:22,532 --> 01:32:24,865
-[camera whirring]
-[zombies groaning]
1822
01:32:24,867 --> 01:32:29,970
Um, sorry, that job at
Bride Boheme, that's all me.
1823
01:32:31,107 --> 01:32:34,475
-But you didn't cause
our email mix-up.
-I, yeah.
1824
01:32:34,477 --> 01:32:35,509
That was me, too.
1825
01:32:35,511 --> 01:32:37,812
[zombies groaning]
1826
01:32:37,814 --> 01:32:40,915
When I was ten years old,
I stole a chocolate milk
from the liquor store.
1827
01:32:40,917 --> 01:32:42,817
-[phones buzzing]
-[zombies groaning]
1828
01:32:42,819 --> 01:32:45,019
And I set a cat on fire
and I blamed it on neighbor boy
1829
01:32:45,021 --> 01:32:47,621
and he went to juvie
and I knew it was wrong.
1830
01:32:47,623 --> 01:32:49,090
[eerie music]
1831
01:32:49,092 --> 01:32:50,024
No!
1832
01:32:51,594 --> 01:32:54,028
You have to sin at the camp.
1833
01:32:54,030 --> 01:32:55,429
[ominous music]
1834
01:32:55,431 --> 01:32:57,665
[phones buzzing]
1835
01:32:57,667 --> 01:33:00,634
Am I supposed to report myself?
1836
01:33:00,636 --> 01:33:01,802
Ugh.
1837
01:33:01,804 --> 01:33:05,072
Maybe I lied
1838
01:33:05,074 --> 01:33:06,807
about the electronics exemption.
1839
01:33:06,943 --> 01:33:08,576
[dramatic music]
1840
01:33:08,578 --> 01:33:10,711
-[zombies thudding]
-[metal clanking]
1841
01:33:10,713 --> 01:33:13,114
[camera whirring]
1842
01:33:13,116 --> 01:33:16,584
[crickets chirping]
1843
01:33:16,586 --> 01:33:18,152
[birds chirping]
1844
01:33:23,926 --> 01:33:25,826
[Scott] He didn't make it,
so sorry.
1845
01:33:25,828 --> 01:33:28,462
Maybe we can apply to that
preschool in Carol Gardens?
1846
01:33:29,499 --> 01:33:32,800
[boss] You're fired. Kidding.
You need a vacation.
1847
01:33:32,802 --> 01:33:36,036
I've got a perfect new account
for you, StarSearchFlops.com.
1848
01:33:38,841 --> 01:33:41,642
Shit! That was meant for Dax.
We were going to surprise you
1849
01:33:41,644 --> 01:33:43,778
turning the brew room
into a nursery
1850
01:33:43,780 --> 01:33:45,413
and then he got tickets to
the Yankees' game
1851
01:33:45,415 --> 01:33:46,947
but totally
doing it next weekend.
1852
01:33:46,949 --> 01:33:49,617
[Queena] Toxic gas?
I hope you're all okay.
1853
01:33:49,619 --> 01:33:52,787
-No worries.
-[Annie] We're staying away
in our rental car.
1854
01:33:52,789 --> 01:33:54,755
-[Todd] Did you try Gas-X?
-Smirk.
1855
01:33:55,691 --> 01:33:59,760
-[message alerts beeping]
-[messages vibrating]
1856
01:33:59,996 --> 01:34:01,429
Is everyone alive?
1857
01:34:02,665 --> 01:34:03,998
[Dalvero grunts]
1858
01:34:06,436 --> 01:34:10,671
Okay, Mia, I mean,
she's totally great.
1859
01:34:10,673 --> 01:34:12,440
I approve.
1860
01:34:12,442 --> 01:34:13,941
Can we just be friends again?
1861
01:34:16,479 --> 01:34:17,144
Jefferson's alive.
1862
01:34:17,146 --> 01:34:18,078
Oh!
1863
01:34:18,514 --> 01:34:20,014
[girls screaming and laughing]
1864
01:34:20,817 --> 01:34:25,085
-Alexis, are you pregnant?
-I didn't want to upstage you.
1865
01:34:25,087 --> 01:34:27,588
-Stop, that's amazing!
-[girls screaming]
1866
01:34:27,590 --> 01:34:29,523
-Boo?
-Boo.
1867
01:34:29,525 --> 01:34:30,524
Oh my God, my dress.
1868
01:34:30,526 --> 01:34:32,493
[both laughing]
1869
01:34:34,530 --> 01:34:36,630
25 minutes? Deal?
1870
01:34:37,767 --> 01:34:38,799
Why is it daytime?
1871
01:34:38,801 --> 01:34:41,502
[message alert dings]
1872
01:34:41,504 --> 01:34:44,238
[water splashing]
1873
01:34:45,608 --> 01:34:46,907
[canoes thudding]
1874
01:34:47,877 --> 01:34:48,809
Hey.
1875
01:34:49,879 --> 01:34:50,778
Hey.
1876
01:34:50,780 --> 01:34:52,213
[grunts]
1877
01:34:54,050 --> 01:34:55,115
[sighs]
1878
01:34:55,751 --> 01:34:57,751
Okay, phone time over.
1879
01:34:58,221 --> 01:35:03,791
-Let's make this wedding happen.
-But nobody's coming.
1880
01:35:03,793 --> 01:35:06,026
If you actually love each other,
does it matter?
1881
01:35:06,562 --> 01:35:08,262
And you have
a pretty strong case
1882
01:35:08,264 --> 01:35:10,097
to contest your Airbnb fees.
1883
01:35:10,099 --> 01:35:11,699
You can use the money
to throw a party
1884
01:35:11,701 --> 01:35:13,534
in the city for
the obligatories.
1885
01:35:13,536 --> 01:35:16,203
And I can probably Molly
Ringwald this into something.
1886
01:35:16,205 --> 01:35:17,137
What about Bride Boheme?
1887
01:35:17,139 --> 01:35:18,606
Oh, it's okay.
1888
01:35:18,608 --> 01:35:19,907
[birds chirping]
1889
01:35:20,209 --> 01:35:21,742
Paulette is actually right.
1890
01:35:21,744 --> 01:35:24,845
If we're going to have
a wedding, we should do it
because we love each other
1891
01:35:24,847 --> 01:35:27,047
and we have
really great friends.
1892
01:35:28,150 --> 01:35:31,552
-[lively message music]
-[ominous music]
1893
01:35:31,554 --> 01:35:33,754
-Oh my God!
-[Trask] What?
1894
01:35:36,225 --> 01:35:38,592
You accepted my friend request.
1895
01:35:38,594 --> 01:35:41,128
[upbeat music]
1896
01:36:00,016 --> 01:36:01,181
[audience applauding
and cheering]
1897
01:36:01,183 --> 01:36:04,018
[camera clicking]
1898
01:36:05,121 --> 01:36:09,857
¶ Glory, glory, hallelujah ¶
1899
01:36:14,931 --> 01:36:19,133
-¶ Glory, glory, hallelujah ¶
-[foot stomping]
1900
01:36:19,135 --> 01:36:22,836
¶ His truth is marching on ¶
1901
01:36:22,838 --> 01:36:26,240
[electronic dance music]
1902
01:37:16,759 --> 01:37:18,025
-Five more minutes.
-[Michael chuckling]
1903
01:37:18,027 --> 01:37:19,126
Five more minutes,
1904
01:37:19,128 --> 01:37:20,260
five more minutes.
129677
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