All language subtitles for Last.Man.Standing.S09E21.WEBRip.x264-ION10

Okay, the girls are asleep.

I can't believe how long it took
Kyle and Ryan to get them home.

Oh, I can.

They were having
way too much fun in that tent.

It's kind of weird when
the toddlers are the ones going,

"Can't we go home now?"

Kyle has an innocence about him,
which I happen to love.

You know, a lot of guys
would've thought it was weird

-to start dating me
after dating my sister.
-Mm-hmm.

Wait... what?

Well, you know, it's not
as outrageous as it sounds.

Kris dated Ryan
and then they broke up...

Yeah, and then Dad
tried to set up Mandy and Kyle.

And then Kyle
started dating Kris.

And then Ryan came back
and Mandy dated Kyle.

And then Ryan
went back to dating Kris.

-And then I dated Kyle...
What?

No, I'm kidding,
I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

Well, one thing's for sure,

Kyle was bound to be a Baxter.

Because I think we all know

who he's really in love with,
you know?

Dad.

Where'd he go?

Oh, that's his superpower.

He can escape conversations
in a single bound.

Mike, where are you?

-Mike. Mi... Oh, God!
-Right here.

Mike.

Well, I was hoping to find
you in here. Just, it's...

-it's been such
a great night and...
-Yeah.

I wanted more of it.

With you, with you. I mean,

gosh, how lucky are we?

-Very lucky.
-Yeah.

Well, you know what I was doing,

I was clearing out
my glove compartment

to make room for something
that's really important to me.

That's very sweet,

but, honestly, I don't think
I'd fit in there.

-Remember the guy
I bought the truck from?
-Yeah.

-Well, he died.
-Oh.

Well, I don't think
he'd fit in there, either.

Actually he was cremated,
so I think

there would be room
for him in there.

Mm, all right. Touché.

I talked to his family
and they found a box

of all the original paperwork
on this truck,

and in there was
the original bill of sale.

Wow, wow.

The original bill of sale.

This is what I love about you.

You get excited for stuff for me
even though

you have no idea
what I'm talking about.

Look, I-I may not know all
the little nitty-gritty details,

but I do sincerely
love this truck.

She loves you back.

Don't you, baby?

You know what,
anything that makes you happy

-makes me happy, mm.
-Mm.

Well, this makes me really
happy, not just happy.

'Cause it's, like,
the final piece of the puzzle

to make this
a perfect restoration.

It's like the final brushstrokes
of the Sistine Chapel.

Mm, well, well, hey,

I mean, the Sistine Chapel's
pretty great,

but it didn't drive
the two of us to Grand Lake.

-To Grand Lake.
What a trip, what a trip.
-Mm-hmm.

-Well, ooh, ooh, ooh.

Emailed me back.

Looks like
they're gonna say yes.

No, no.

What? What's the matter?
What, do they want more money?

No, they sold it
to somebody else.

What?! I mean,
who-who would want this?

You said it wasn't worth
anything to anybody else.

I'll give you a hint.

He talks
like this. He comes over

and he always
makes a noise like that.

Buzz Lightyear with a cold?

So the monkey says, "You put
it in, you pull it out."

-Ah, that's a... Oh.

Good morning, Baxter.

I was just out in the parking
lot admiring your truck.

Uh, amazing restoration.

But it's just
so close to perfect.

Great jokes, great jokes.

Before you get any more jokes,
remember,

that chin makes
a really big target.

How did you even know
about the bill of sale?

You blabbed about it as soon
as you heard from them.

You talk about finishing
that truck

more than you talk
about your kids.

I talk about my kids a lot.

They just don't win
as many awards as the truck.

Why do you want
the bill of sale?

Uh, I think it's obvious,
isn't it?

You want it because I want it.

Whoa, are we in
a church basement?

'Cause I think I just heard
somebody yell, "Bingo!"

All right, all right, all right.

How much do you want?

You know, I mean, come on,

I mean, to find
the original bill of sale

for a vehicle that old--
that's-that's...

that's very rare.

I understand that, you viper.

Okay, look,
just to get this over with,

I'll go to my maximum amount.

I'll give you...
I will give you $500.

Got to say no.

S... Seven fifty.

That's not what I'm thinking.

All right, all right,
all right, all right, I give up.

Cut the crap, you win, you win.
Go ahead, you win.

What do you want?
How much do you want for it?

I want nothing.

I want to give it to you.

What kind of a sick game
is this?

Look...

every time
you look at that truck,

you're gonna remember that it
was finally completely restored

-by your best friend Joe.
-No, no, no, no....

$10,000.

It's our bond, for life.

20 grand?

-Eh...
-Here you go, Mikey boy.

Huh? That's my new
best friend name for you.

And you can call me Joey boy.

I-I would give you $50,000.

That was such a nice dinner
tonight, hon. Thank you.

Listen, you deserve to have me
make your dinner every night.

Not gonna happen,
but you deserve it.

Aw.

Well, uh, as much as I'd like
to think it was me,

I'd bet it has more to do
with your truck and her...

original bill of sale.

Wow, sexy pickup truck talk.

It's getting to be quite
a night, huh?

You know, I don't want
to jinx anything,

but everything has just been
so perfect lately.

You know what's perfect?

-This shower's got room
for two people.

That worked?

Oh, great.

It's bedtime and some idiot's
alarm is going off.

Coming through.
That's not an idiot.

That's my car alarm.
That's the truck.

What? What, aren't you gonna
go down and turn it off?

No need to go down there.

It's driving down the street.

How could somebody

steal a truck that quickly?

I agree with Officer King.

It was obviously professionals.

Yeah, maybe
if I had professionals

put my car alarm on,
that would've worked.

The alarm worked.

-I-I heard it all the way
over at my house.
-I-I know.

I'm sorry,
I'm-I'm just so angry.

Yeah, I know
this is hard, Baxter.

Yeah, I'm sorry, honey.

I know how much
that truck meant to you.

I've had that truck ten years.

That's longer than I've done
improvement on this home.

But, I mean, wasn't there
some-some kind

-of tracking device
you guys installed?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, but...

-But what?
-We're getting no GPS signal,

which means somehow they figured
out how to disable it?

Yeah, well, meaning what?

Meaning the truck is no longer

on the network.

Stupid network.

Stupid, stupid network.

Well, may-maybe
there's another network

you could find it on.

It's not the way
it works, honey.

Actually, I've heard of that
happening before.

I'm not holding my breath.

Okay, thank you,

Officer.

-Nothing yet.

They say only one in five
stolen cars gets recovered.

But that's just cars.

Maybe trucks are different.

We are gonna beat those odds.

Uh, where's Dad?

We want to give him
our social media update.

Uh, in a helicopter.
Apparently he has a friend

who works for traffic
for Channel Five.

Oh, Channel Seven is way better.

They have that Accu-Traffic
Meter. But this is good.

So, what's the update?

Um, well, we posted photos
on both of our profiles.

And so far, people have

zero trucks to give.

Get it?

Yes, that's hilarious.

You know... wh... You know what,
just-just, um, put a picture

-of the truck on the Outdoor Man
Twitter feed.
-Okay.

Told you she wouldn't like
the "zero trucks" thing.

So, Joe.

-What are we looking at?
-Really?

Look, I know you grew up
with GPS on your phone,

but this is what
the rest of us call a map.

Okay, uh, what are the pins for?

Okay, the pins represent
every chop shop

in the Denver area, okay?

If your dad's truck is being
stripped down for parts,

it's at one of these pins.

-Nice work, Joe. Yes.
-Well, hey, it...

I take it personally, you know?

I mean, the bill of sale
I gave him is in that truck.

It was the symbol of our union
and somebody stole our union.

Yeah. I think that's what
he's most upset about.

-Oh... yeah.
-Hey.

-Still no IDs from Mike's
surveillance cameras.
-Oh, man.

Those guys wore masks,
they were fast,

they were good.

Uh, how are Ryan and Kyle doing
with their podcast?

Well, I disapprove
of the term "nerd alert,"

-but they are literally
alerting the nerds.
-Hm.

Emergency pod, emergency pod.

This is Ry-Ry and Ky-Ky,
the Sci-Fi Guy-Guys,

coming at you
with a live podcast.

If you are anywhere
within the sound of my voice,

we are looking for a green 1956

F100 pickup.

And if you have any information
on the whereabouts

of this truck,
you will be rewarded

with an autographed copy
of volume one, issue 22

of Dr. Calamity.

BOTH
"Diagnosis Chaos."

Okay, listen up, guys, listen.

Yeah, I'm putting out
a press release

for the safe return
of Mike's truck.

Oh, well, that's
very nice of you, Ed.

-But, wow!
-Mm-hmm.

I mean, that, this is
a heck of a lot of money.

Don't worry,
I'm not gonna give it to them.

No, the reward
is to lure the thieves here.

-Mm-hmm.
-Right? And then...

beat the crap out of them,
because they're not gonna

-get away with this...
-Okay, Ed, Ed, listen, listen.

I-I know you're trying to help,

but, um, generally,
rewards just tend to...

well, they lead to
false tips, you know?

-Oh, right.
-Yeah, Ed, maybe-maybe
you can get some of your friends

to help, you know?

You know, peoplewho know
people.

You know what I mean?

Chuck, that offends me.
That's really offens...

What makes you think
I know the kind

of people
that you're describing?

-Hey, man, I-I...
-I mean, it's,
yeah, right, sure.

Yeah, yeah.

I'll give them a call.

Sweetheart, sweetheart,
come on.

You got to try to relax.

Just, why don't you
go do something,

take your mind off it?

Great.
You know what I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna head out
and work on my truck.

Oh, wait a minute.

Stop. Come on, you...
look, you've barely eaten,

you haven't slept.

I-I mean,
I'm-I'm worried about you.

Something I love in my life
has been taken from me,

and I just want to know
what happened to it. That's it,

that's it, I just want to know
what's going on with it.

-All right, all right.

-That's Chuck.
Hold on a second.
-Okay.

-Hey, Chuck, come on in.
-Hey, Baxter, Vanessa.
-Hey, hi. Yeah.

Listen, I don't like the look
on your face, unless you're

messing with me. Please say
you're messing with me.

I talked to my buddy
over at the Denver PD.

Saw some surveillance footage
of your truck being

pulled into a chop shop
yesterday.

They raided the place.
It's gone.

-Sorry, Baxter.
-I-I appreciate

-you doing all the work.
-Well, thanks.
Thanks for coming.

-Thanks.
-Yeah. See you guys later. Bye.

Okay.

-At least I know.
-All right, well,

um, uh, can I-can I
do something for you?

-Uh, you want to-you want to
take a walk or, uh, have a beer?
-Uh...

Uh, you know, hey, look,
w-why don't we sit down.

Let's just sit down in silence.
Come on, we'll sit down.

We'll sit here in, uh, in, uh,
in total silence.

Just right here like this.
Okay.

You know, I'm not very
good at this. I'm just...

All right. I'm gonna do it,
I'm gonna do it.

I'm trying. I'll do it.
Okay.

I'm okay.

Oh, Mike, come on, it's me.

You don't have to pretend.
Come on.

No, I don't know why, but...

I'm okay with this.

-I'm okay.
-Really?

Yeah.

All right, well, good, good.

I-I'm glad you're okay.
Good.

Because I am not!

You know, I don't know why,
but I'm okay with that, too.

Honey, what's going on?

I'm upset about the truck, too.

I mean, I-I was so worried
about you before

that I-I ignored
my own feelings, and then I...

I don't know,
it all just rushed in.

You really liked that truck?

You know, my memory serves,
it was always you going,

"Dinner's ready.
Enough with the truck."

No, no, no, no.
But then, sometimes

we'd wind up sitting
out there together,

-and, uh, and we'd talk.
-Mm-hmm.

I don't know,
something about the...

the engine fumes
opened you up.

Well, if you enjoyed
those conversations,

I'm sure the brain damage
is worth it.

Uh, you know, but it wasn't
just being with you

when you worked on it.

I mean, when you... when
you traveled for Outdoor Man,

I would... I would...
I would sit out there

and just, um,
just listen to the radio.

It's a great radio.
It's vintage, you know.

Rounded fronts, sits
right under the ashtray there.

Or used to.

I felt close to you.

I mean, just, uh,
listening to our old songs

and having a glass of wine,
it just,

it felt like I was with you.

And then, uh...

I mean, now it's gone.

So you-you drank in my truck?

The point is

the truck mattered to me, too.

And, I mean, not just to me
but to-to the whole family.

So, everybody was drinking
in the truck?

Honey, look, I'm-I'm glad...
I'm glad you're okay.

-Really, really, I am, but...
-I am.

but I'm just saying,
it's gonna take the rest of us

a-a little time.

Huh.
So my... my truck gets stolen,

and I got to make
everybody else feel good.

Oh, oh.
Hey, Joe.

-Hiya. Thanks for coming.
-I'm sorry for your loss.

-You know, it was just...
-Well...

Feels like I'm at the age now
where all I do

-is go to truck memorials.
-Right. Come on in.

Hey, hey, oh.
Sorry I'm late.
-Oh, hey. Hi.

-I had to, uh, drop the girls
at the sitter.
-Oh, well, don't worry,

we haven't started yet.

-Oh, good. Okay.
-All right.

Uh, so we're all here
for a memorial for a truck?

Well, uh, yeah.

When you lose
something important,

it can sometimes
be hard to deal with, and...

and Mike thought
this might be a good chance

for everyone to say goodbye.

But it's a truck.

Yeah, well, don't-don't
think of it as a truck.

Think of it as something
this group was involved with

for ten years. I mean, look,
Mike may have been in charge,

but-but we all played a part.

Eh, seems like a stretch.

All right, well, we're
doing this, so get over it.

Hey, everybody, come on, uh,
come on, please take your seats.

-Good.
-Uh, come on, let's sit down,
everybody. Come on, you guys.

-Hey. Hi.
-Hey, hey, hey. Hi.

I really appreciate
you guys coming in.

This is just
a little memory session,

kind of say...
say goodbye to something

that's been part of our lives
for ten years.

And anybody who wants to start,

just no bummers,
no bummers, all uplifting.

-Anything? Kyle.
-Uh...

-All right. I'll go.
-Good.

Nope, not ready.

Kris, come on,
something about the truck.

Oh, yeah, um, okay.
I'll always remember that truck,

-because it reminds me of Dad.

It was hard to get started, uh,

and real loud once it did.

There you go.
All right.

Um, okay.

At first,
I didn't care about this truck,

and then I... saw
how much effort you put into it

and how much it meant to you...

No bummers!
No... Hey!

-No bummers!
-Okay, okay!

It was a pretty green.

Wasn't it?

Hey.
Uh, when I first moved here,

I was scared
to talk to Mr. Baxter.

But then Mandy told me,

"If you can't think of something
to talk about with my dad...

ask him about his truck."

Until yesterday,
that was good advice.

Thanks.

-All right, Kyle.

Still not ready.

Okay, all right,
all right, um...

I got to admit
I never got along with Baxter

till we started
working on that truck.

-What?
-Yeah.

I'm gonna miss that truck.

I'll go.
-Oh, okay. Ed.

I, uh, learned long ago
that vehicles come and go,

and-and it's best
not to get attached

to any particular one.

Right.
-I broke the rule with this one.

Oh, uh...

yeah, it was a nice truck.

Large carbon footprint.

-But, uh...

yeah, it was a nice truck.

As many of you know...

I provided the final,
perfect piece to this project.

Although it's over now,

the bond I formed with Mike...

will last forever.

Actually, they stole that, too,
Joe. Now, sit down.

All right, Kyle, you get
one more chance, so let's go.

Three, two, one.
Go, baby.

I don't want it to be gone.

-So that's it? We should go eat?
uh, no, no, no.

Wait, there's, uh,
there's one more.

-Just, uh, here we go.
-Oh.

-Hey, Eve!
Hi! Eve!

Hey, everybody!

Hi, guys!

Hey, Dad.

I'm sorry I couldn't be there.

--I really, really wanted to be.
-I

Mom, could you... could you
stop shaking the screen?

-I mean,
I'm getting really nauseous.
-Sorry, sorry. I'm sorry, I'm...

-I'm just a little emotional.

Go ahead. Sorry.

I just want to say that...

I loved that truck, too.

I don't really
show emotion much...

...ever, but...

...I'm gonna really miss
working on it with you.

Those were some
of the best times of my life.

So yeah,

that's pretty much
what I've been up to.

-I can't believe
you broke the sound barrier.
-I know. I mean,

I've broken wind,
I've-I've shattered glass,

but I've never
broken the sound barrier.

-nyway, I got to get up at 0500,
-A
and for you civilians,

-that's early.

All right.
Well, love you, sweetie.

-Go save America.
We love you so much.
-Yeah.

Hey, Kyle, come on, baby.
It's time to go.

Okay, uh, ten more minutes.

That's what you said
ten minutes ago.

Yeah, but we mean it this time!

-God, I can't believe
you used to date both of them.

So you think you're gonna
find another car to work on?

I don't know, I don't know.

Maybe.
Maybe not.

Right now I just
want to enjoy this moment

with all of you.

Mm.

Come on.

What's so funny?

You don't want to know.

Probably not.

Ooh. That...
Yeah, mm-hmm.

All right, I'm heading out.

Need a lift?

Uh, no, thanks, I...

I-I've got my wife's minivan.

-Don't make any jokes.
-No, that's all right.

In my day, driving a van
meant you were cool.

-Yeah?
-Yeah, that or a serial killer.

See you tomorrow?

-Hmm?
-Okay.

Uh...

Hey, Mike Baxter here
for Outdoor Man,

with a big thank-you to everyone
who's watched these vlogs,

all 194 of them.

I'm not gonna lie--
you got great taste.

But I also wanted to thank
everyone who's not watching,

because they're probably
out making something,

building something, doing
something, fixing something.

For too many people,
the only thing they know

is how to make an excuse.

"It was too hard."
"Didn't feel good."

"They sent the wrong part."

I've been thinking a lot about
makers and takers, you know?

Because I had something
very valuable taken from me.

Somebody took my truck.

Ten years of attention
to detail-- poof, gone.

It's an empty feeling,
like when John Elway retired.

Wow. Am I sad? Yeah, I'm sad.

And I did what I always do
eat some pork

and remember Ronald Reagan--

the Gipper--
and the verse he quoted

when he lost
the 1976 GOP nomination.

"Though I am hurt,
I am not slain.

"I lay me down to bleed a while.

Then I'll rise
and fight again."

I loved every moment
of that show...

I mean truck.

It was a classic
from a simpler, happier time.

You know... the truck.

And that's something
that can't be stolen from me.

What kind of punks
steal other people's stuff?

Make something yourself, men.

My mother was right.
She always quoted

this famous comedian--
and I can't remember his name--

who said, "Men are pigs.

Oh, oh, oh."

Baxter out.

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