All language subtitles for Four.Good.Days.2020.English

I'm pouring a glass.
Do you want some?

No, I'm good!

-Who's there?

Hello?

Mom, it's me.

Mom!

Door one.

Uh,
my key doesn't work.

No, we, uh...

We changed the locks last year

after you and Eric
stole the guitars.

The deal was
you wouldn't come back

until you were clean.

Wait, wait, wait.

That is why
I'm here. I am...

I'm done.

I wanna come home.

Are you done?
Are you out of drugs?

I ended it with Eric.

He's gone. I've been living
on my own on the streets

for maybe like a week
or maybe even more.

You know, I've been thinking
about all the things

that you said to me
since I was like a little girl

and I've had these,
like, realizations like,

these big, big realizations
that I wanna go back to school

and I wanna get a job

and I just wanna
get my kids back...

Molly, stop. Just stop.

I've heard this speech
for 10 years.

Mom,
I need to be home.

You know, I do not do well
when I'm left on my own

and I wanna detox

and I can do that here.

No. Come back when you're clean.

No, Mom, please.

I'll see you when you're clean.

-Mom! Please! Mom!

-It's me!

-Come here, come here.

Oh!

-You're doing the right thing.

If you let her in,
she's gonna blow up your life.

Oh, you know,
don't talk about her like that.

She's not a bomb.

I'm just saying
this is what you have to do.

She won't walk if you carry her.

Oh, fuck off.

Okay.

Don't make me call the police.

Oh, my God. Who are you?

Every time you
come into this house,
something disappears.

I'll stay at a hotel.

I just need some place safe
that I can get clean.

Just money for a hotel then.

You want me to give you money?

Are you crazy?

Like the money you needed
for shoes or for glasses?

Or for, uh, oh,
online cosmetology classes?

Or Zumba lessons
to get back in shape?

How much heroin have I paid for?

You're right.

I'll just detox under a highway

with prostitutes and rats,

'cause that's
a much better plan, Mom.

Why are you covering your mouth?

Let me see.

Show me.

Oh, my God.

Can I please just
have a pillow and a blanket?

It gets really cold at night.

Get well, Molly.

I set the alarm.

Why did you say before
that she blows up my life?

I mean what you
really meant was our life?

-Yes.
-So why didn't
you just say that...

Do I need to?

I'm tired of what
we've been through.

I'm scared for you
whenever she's around.

Just don't let her suck you in.

She doesn't suck me in.

Whenever I've decided
to reengage with her,

I've always done it
with my eyes wide open.

-Door one.

If you're hoping for pity,
there's none coming.

-Go to a shelter.
-I need to be home.

Go, please.

Oh, God damn it,
you are stubborn.

You're like a mule.

If there's anyone or anything

more fucking relentless
than heroin, it's you.

That's my one glimmer
of hope in all this here.

If you're serious,

I'll drive you
to detox right now.

Okay, but first can I stay
here a couple of days.

-No.
-Getting into detox
is not that simple...

Molly, we can definitely try.

Beds open up every day.

-They do not open up everyday.
-Either we leave right now,

or you can get used
to sleeping on the porch.

Fuck! Were you always
this heartless bitch? Huh?

I guess I must have forgotten.

Can I at least
come inside and shower?

I haven't showered in weeks.

I'm...
I'm on my period.

No. I'll go get my things.

Molly, wait here.

-I'll go with you.
-Wait here.

Seat belt.

We'll pick up tampons
on the way. Okay?

No. I don't need any.

You're not on...

Okay.

-Hello.
-Hello.

-Name?
-Molly...

Molly Wheeler Margaret.

Do you have your Medicaid card?

Yeah.

What drugs are you using?

Heroin, methadone
and some crack.

Uh, if I get any,
then maybe Adderall.

Last time you used?

Yesterday morning
so I'm hurting.

How long have you been addicted?

-Hmm.
-Ten years or more.

Have you ever
been through detox?

-Uh-huh.
-How many times?

Um...

Fourteen.

-Excuse me?
-Fourteen times.

Okay, so you know the drill.

Medicaid pays for three nights.

-After that, you're on your own.
-Mm-hmm.

You get a cot, two towels,
three meals a day,
if you can tolerate them.

Muscle spasms, cold sweats,

fever, vomiting,
paranoia, insomnia.
All that's normal.

But if you start to have trouble
breathing, speak up.

The only open bed
is in a shared woman's room.

Sign here.

Okay.

Let's go.

Okay. You've made your point.
Can I please come home now?

No. I'll pick you up
in three days.

Really?
You're not gonna help?

You're gonna walk away?

It's your thing, huh?

Fucking walk away!

Come on.

Oh, fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.

You motherfucker.

She's in hell right now.

What?

She's in pain from head to toe

and I kicked her to the curb.

You should call
your mothers' group.

Don't want their goddamn pity.

It helps, you know. It helps.

-You're all in the same boat.
-Yeah.

Sinking 24/7.

Sometimes I get
the feeling that...

I don't want
to love her anymore.

Scares the shit out of me.

I'm gonna keep
loving her, right?

Of course.

Oh.

This is the mess
you married into.

I'm okay with it.

Yeah, then you
really are an idiot.

You always talk to me like that

whenever she's around.
Have you noticed that?

Stop doing it.

Okay?

I'm sorry, honey.

Oh, that feels so good.

You're the best, Deb.

Oh, did I tell you we just
got back from a trip to Napa?

Oh, really?

-How was it?
-It was incredible.

Walter's client
let us say in his house.

House was
not really a word for it.

It's ridiculous.

I'm gonna level
with you, Molly,

because you don't
have time for more bull.

You have gone
through this 15 times.

Statistically, you are
likely to be back again.

Heroin has a 97 percent
relapse rate.

You've already blown
through the veins
in your arms, your ankles,

hands, feet.

Yeah, you stayed away
from your neck so far,

but most people
go there sooner or later.

You have put yourself
in quite a situation.

-No, actually, you all
put her in this situation.
-Oh, my God, Mom. Please.

Her problem started
in a doctor's office
just like this.

When she was 17,

she sprained
her knee water skiing

and walked out
with a prescription for 75 Oxy

and never a refill denied.

Now that's, that's terrible.

-I'm sorry.
-You and me both.

What are your triggers?

Boredom, anxiety,
shame, loneliness.

My life.
Basically my life's a trigger.

You're not alone.

I'm 31 years old,

and I've done nothing
but go down in life.

So I can sit around
and feel all of that,

or I can do something
about it and feel good

and numb.

She's always been really
sensitive to things like that.

To feelings.

It's always what she said
since she was a teenager.

How would you know?
You weren't even there...

Molly, I'm here now.

Let's talk about
our options. Hmm?

Do either of you know
what an opioid antagonist is?

No.

It's a shot we give you
once a month,

and it blocks opioids
from getting into your system.

Heroin, Oxy, narco.

The shot essentially makes you
immune to getting high.

Now it's not a magic bullet.

You still have to do
the active work of recovery.

Twelve-steps therapy, all of it.

Is it safe?

Are you fucking kidding me?

You've spent 10 years

shooting up heroin
laced with what,

rat poison and baby powder
and God knows what else.

And now all of a sudden,
your body's a temple.

Is it fucking safe? Oh, God.

Jesus, Molly.

Yes, it's safe.

FDA approved.

You have to be clean
for at least a week.

Now if you still
have drugs in your system

when you get this shot,

it puts you into something
called rapid withdrawal.

That's very dangerous.

Emergency room stuff.

And then a shot once a month.

It's a chance.

Take it, Moll.

It's my call, Mom.

Fine. Yeah, okay.

I think
that's a good choice.

You have been in detox
four days already.

You should do
four more to be safe.

So let's shoot
for 9:00 a.m., Friday.

Wait. Four more days? Seriously?

She can't wait that long.
She might be using in an hour.

-Thanks for the vote
of confidence.
-Can't she stay here?

-No.
-No. Unfortunately,
we need the bed.

You need to be
somewhere not alone

and away from other users.

Four more days.

I can do that. All right?

-Yeah.
-Yeah.

-Yeah, you can.
-Yeah.

That guy should be shot.

-Okay.
-Yeah. So sorry.

Your gums are very inflamed.

I'm gonna give you
some ointment to take home.

-Non-narcotic,
but use it sparingly anyway.
-Hmm.

Now, these are temps.

Let's try them for size.

Uh, okay.

Ow!

I'll give you call
in a couple of weeks

when the real ones come in.

They hurt.

Yes, they'll take
some getting used to.

Let me see.

-Door one.

Get in here.

-You sure?
I don't wanna impose.

If now's a bad time,

-I can always come back later.
-Oh, screw you.

Molly's amazing salon.

Remember the time I accidentally
dyed your hair pink?

Accidentally? Sure.

Why do you keep all this crap?
It's like a museum.

Oh, you know,
a lot of good memories.

Yeah, from before
I was a fuck up.

Remember what this is?

Argh!

Smallest
violin in the world.

Where the fuck are my perfumes?
My... My jewelry.

You sold the perfume
and you pawned all the jewelry

along with my wedding ring,
my engagement ring,

your grandmother's.

Jesus.

Did you shoot up in here?

I don't know.
I guess I must have after rehab.

Oh! That's reassuring.

Oh, what the fuck?

Oh!

So, um, I'm supposed
to work tonight.

The casino's booked solid,

but I'll have my phone on me,

and it'll only be
a couple of hours.

Chris will be here.

He's out back.

But if you
need anything, call me...

Did you tell him
that I was staying here?

Of course, I did.

I called him.

He's...

He's fine with it.

I'm happy you're home.

I'm gonna go have a cigarette.

Jesus. What is that sound?

It's the alarm.

What? Can you turn it off?

I need it to beep
every time the door opens.

Why? This is like the safest
neighborhood in the world.

This puzzle been here
this whole time?

Oh. Yeah.
I didn't want to touch it.

I thought maybe you'd like
to finish it someday.

No, I hate it.

This is a pay as you go.

So, uh, let me know
if you run out of minutes.

Ran out of minutes?
Who am I gonna call?

I entered my number.

Your sister's, the kids',
the clinic and your dad's.

When was the last
time I was here?

Um, well, I guess it was
about a year and a half ago.

I woke up the next morning
and you were gone.

Can you open the garage door?

Hi.

Is that her?

Close it.

Are you gonna be all right?

Mmm-hmm.

Okay, I'm leaving.

-What?

Sorry.

Let me know
if you need
anything, huh?

Yeah.
Thank you.

Okay.

Door one.

-It's me.

I...

I'm freezing.

I thought withdrawals
were supposed to be over.

No. Stay. Stay.

Oh, Molly.

I'm tired.

Did I really sell
your wedding rings?

You know, just...

just don't worry about it.

-Oh.
-This is a disease.

This isn't you.

-It's not.
-No.

No, it's another you.

It's not the real you.

She isn't you.

Ah, mind bending, Mom.

Do you remember...

right after I left your dad,

I opened that...

...that pottery
painting store

way out of the mall.

Oh, God, that was
such a bad idea.

It was a terrible location,

but I was so tired of...

trying to get out
from under your dad,

finding something of my own.

You know that place
was so quiet,

just like a mausoleum.

All those empty chairs.

And even after all,
I put you through,

leaving you,

you started coming all the way
out there after school,

dragging your friends
with you.

You even hosted
a birthday party there
for God's sake.

And after
a couple of months,

you had so many of those
damn coffee mugs.

That was pretty great.

That was you.

Almost one day down,

three more to go.

Does Dad know that I'm home?

I'll tell him.

-Good night, kiddo.

It's 10:00 am.

They're not here.

It's, uh, 10:03.

Oh, relax.

I bet they don't come.
Why?

-Why would they come?
-Oh, stop that.

Have you heard
from your sister?

No. Why?

Well, she wants to see you.

Since when did she have
the time to see anyone?

Where are your teeth?

Oh, okay.

They hurt.

Hi!

-Grandma!
-Grandma!

-Hi, Grandma!
-It's so good to see you.

-Oh, hi, sweetie.
-I missed you.

Oh, how are you?

Ah, go hug your mom.

-Hi, kiddo.
-Hi, Sean.

Hi, Deb.

Hey, we, uh...

we can't stay long,
couple hours or so.

Okay, well,
let's go inside.

Come on.

You want some coffee?

Yeah, sure.

You look good.

No, but thanks.

Ta-da!

-All right.
-Ah...

-Here, eat up.
-One.

-Mmm.
-One.

So how's work?

It's... it's real good.

There's so much of it.

Thinking about opening up
a second body shop.

Uh-hmm. Wait,
why are you doing that?

You love nuts.

I do. But the doctor says
I can't have any.

Well, we found out last year
that some nuts

make her tummy hurt.

Um, I broke my ankle,
I was in a cast.

-Oh, wow.
-It wasn't broken.

-Was too.
-No.

-Shut up, moron.
-Come on, guys.

We talked about this.

He got a hairline fracture
flying off a swing set.

-Hmm.
-Knucklehead.

They're good kids, though.

Yeah.

Yeah, I know.
I know they're good kids.

How's Dad?

Go for it.

-He's grumpy.
-What?

-You are.
-But he's okay.

He helps us with homework
and stuff.

-I am not grumpy.
-He farts a lot.

Now that's a lie.

Chill, bruh.
We like you.

I'm not your "bruh," bruh.

-You're a "duh."
-Duh.

Oh, and he has a girlfriend.

She's a chef.

Her food is yummy.

Get him, get him.

Come on, get him!

Come on! Come on!

-Uh, boom! You got got.
-Oh... no.

Kiddo.

-Mm.
-Hold on, baby.

Can I play?

Sure.

Phew. Ready.

-Come on.

Come on. No, no, no,
don't press that.

No, no, no, no, no.
That's cheating.

You can't do that.
You can't do that.

You can't do that.

Come on.

Come on. Come on.

-Oh, no, no, no.

-Oh, no!
-Ha.

Mom, you suck.
You totally suck.

Hey.

You suck. You suck.

You suck. You suck!

You suck! You suck.

You suck! You suck!

You suck.

I...

-You suck. You suck.
-Stop it. Stop it.

You suck.
You suck. You suck.

Now who sucks, huh?
Cheater?

You suck. Give me the remote.

-I won. No.
-Give me this.

That's what you get
for sucking.

-No. You stop it. Stop it.
-No. No.

Mom! Mom, he's touching me.

It's so beautiful
out here.

Right now.

Yeah.

Just wish life could be
more like this.

One moment...

then another.

Isn't it?

I mean,
what's the alternative?

Uh, I don't know.

I'm always thinking
about the past,

or worrying about the future.

You know,
even before I did drugs,

I remember worrying about
what was next.

Like, I just couldn't live
with the uncertainty.

I just want now to be now.

The way it is for kids,

or animals, plants.

Yeah, I never
thought of that.

You've always been
so smart, Moll.

Yeah. And look at where
that's gotten me.

Hey, this is Dale.

-Leave a message or don't.
-[BEEP]

Hey, it's me.

Um...

I think you should know
that Molly is home.

She's clean.

As rickety as hell.

And I know you don't like
talking about this stuff,

but it really seems
different this time.

I haven't seen her
like this since...

I don't know when.

She's really trying, Dale,

and she keeps
asking about you.

So I was wondering
if you could give her a call?

Um, you know, she's...

she needs support.

And I think
it might really help.

All right, so don't be
an asshole.

Just call.

Okay. Bye.

How do you guys still have
so much energy?

-I don't know.
-How's that possible.

We had PE today.

Well,
you must love running.

So I know we talked
about them

staying with you over
the holiday weekend.

Or they can also
stay with my sister,

depending on how
things were going.

Oh, no, no, I'll be fine.

You know,
I could totally...

Yeah, I'm okay.

-Let me know.
-I'll call you next week.

-Bye.
-Thanks for coming.

All right. Come on, guys.
Let's go, Let's go.

Oh.

Bye, kiddo.

-Bye, baby.
-Bye.

Hey.

When can we come back?

Soon.

-Can we sleep over?
-Uh...

-Sure.
-Yeah, that'd be fine.

-Please, Dad?
-We'll see, buddy.

Ah, those kids are golden.

After all, they've been through.

They're wonderful.

Yeah.

How was it with Sean?

What, not good?

He hurt his back.

He wants me
to get him pain killers.

Are you kidding me?

I should call the police
on him right now.

You're not gonna do that
because the kids will
end up in foster care.

No, they won't.
They could stay with me.

Maybe. But until
the court rules on it,

they'll be in a foster home.

You know this,
please just stop.

That sound
is driving me crazy.

How am I supposed to get better

with that thing beeping
every five minutes,

reminding me you suck,
you suck, you suck.

Jesus, it's like
I'm in prison.

I hate it as well,
but it's just our reality.

You want something
from the store?

Can you please
just give me 20 bucks

and I'll go by myself?

I feel like a toddler.

Well, that's a pretty
good idea,

but I think
it might be easier

if I just ordered in
some heroin.

Okay,

cigarettes, cupcakes.

Soda.

What?

You all right?

Yeah.

Your eyes look a little red.

I'm tired.

Jesus, what do you
want me to say?

That I'm bored shitless
and craving?

I'm bored shitless
and craving.

Okay.

Just two more days.

You just have
to hang in there,

two more days.

No. It's-- It's more than that.

Sixty hours. Less.

-You can do it.
-Yeah, but can you?

You're so wound up,

you're gonna drop dead
of a heart attack.

All right, Moll,
come with me.

Come on.

Pick any one, it's just
food coloring and sugar.

Molly.

Wow.

Coach Miller.

-Hi.
-How are you?

I'm good.

Good.

-Hey, Deb.
-Hey.

Long time, my goodness.

We've all been rooting
for you over the years.

Thank you.

Well, you look good.

-You do.
-Yeah.

Did you know that

I moved over
to Lincoln last year.

They got me teaching
health and wellness.

Did you ever take that class?

The car crash videos?

Exactly.

Except the videos
just put them to sleep.

These kids think
they're invincible.

-Hmm.
-That doesn't change, right?

I'm in recovery.

-Good for you.
-Hm.

I wish someone like you would
come and talk to these kids.

I mean, someone
who's gone through...

addiction troubles
and come out the other side.

You should think about it.

It's just that, uh...

I'm not one
for public speaking. So...

We've already had two kids
overdose this year.

You said Lincoln in, um...

In southeast,
is that right?

Yeah. Tough neighborhood.

You'll make a big impact.

I'll think about it.

Okay.

Good to see you.

Great to see you.

Who was that?

My dealer.

He said he'll be here
in 15 minutes.

Ha-ha.

If I wasn't a junkie,
would you even ask?

Probably not.

Has your dad called?

No.

Oh, don't go out there yet.

Come on, sit with me.

Oh, I forgot.

I have something for you.

What is it?

Open it.

Are you selling the house
or buying me one?

Do you recognize her?

-No.
-Take a closer look.

Mom, I don't know
who this is.

It's Colson Kirsebom.

No.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, my God.

I think it was pretty hard
for his, her parents.

But you know what?

I think
everything's okay now.

Holy shit.

The prom king is now a queen.

Why is that so funny?

I don't know,
but we shouldn't laugh.

-Uh-huh.
-Good for her.

That's one way
to reboot your life, huh?

Yeah, right. Yeah.

Hmph.

Do you know I used to date him?

-You did?
-Mm-hmm.

Freshman year.

Right around the time you left
for, like, a couple of weeks.

Oh, okay.

I'm so sorry.

Wish I'd been around.

Yeah, you should have been.

Like, it was just so sudden.

You know, one day you were...

putting notes
in my lunch box,

and then the next,
you disappeared

on your little
two-year hiatus.

I thought you couldn't stand
to be around us, around me.

That wasn't it.

You know that's not true.

Do I?

Haven't we been
over this a lot?

I got pregnant
with your sister.

Unplanned.

And in a couple of months,

I found myself with a baby,

and I quit my job,

and I was married to a man

who I really didn't know
very well,

and he was...

He was difficult.

Me too, maybe.

And when your sister
was eight,

I got pregnant again
and we were,

were really happy
about that.

We were...

I think we were at
a pretty good point.

Me and your dad,
you know, for a moment.

Then for 15 years,

I held everything together...

trying not to disappoint,

swallowing your father's
fucking bullshit.

His temper tantrums,
his moods.

And then one night
I came home

and I heard him started
to rev up one of his fits.

Something about the house.

I don't know...

and I just...

That was it.

I left that night.

You were the head
of the fucking PTA.

You were so put together.

I was pretending.

I just... I am so sorry

for causing you
so much pain,

but I can't apologize
for trying to survive.

I just can't.

That would be lying.

You think it's my fault

that you're an addict.

Mm.

This is amazing.

Take some deep breaths.

Hm.

So she's too busy to come?

Oh, I'm fine, Ashley.

How are you?

Sorry.

How are you, Mom?

Oh, same old.

-You?
-I'm good.

Kids, work.
I'm tired all the time.

But looking really good
on Instagram.

My kids are a gift.

I'm thriving.
I'm living my best life.

Ladies.

Uh, I'll just have
coffee, thanks.

Uh, make that two,

-and have a side of fries.
-Okay.

Fries for breakfast?

Why not?
That'd make me feel good.

So where is she?

She wanted to come,

but she chickened out
at the last minute.

No, she, um...

she tried to build up
her self-esteem.

And I'm working against that?

No.

It's not about you.

No, it never is.

Anyway,
I'm really glad
that it's just us

because I need a break
from all the craziness.

What craziness? I thought
you said she's doing good.

Well, no, she is. She is.
It's just, you know...

it's a little crazy
at the house right now.

She sits around
smoking, twitching,

and I am there
watching her like a hawk

and pretending that I'm not.

You know Chris.
He's addicted to the news.

He's on his iPad all the time.

He can't get enough
of the world falling apart.

I really don't think they should
allow men to retire.

So how, how is she?

Pale, thin.

Toothless.

But, you know, pretty damn good
under the circumstances.

I was seeing glimpses
of the old Moll.

Really?

That's good.

I don't know, Ash.

I think she might
make it this time.

If she can only hang on
for a couple more days.

Then she could
get the shot,

and one month clean
will turn into two months

and two months into six.

God willing.

Mom.

Since when do you
believe in God?

Since not believing
didn't work.

I know I shouldn't
get my hopes up,

but...

at this point,
all I have left is hope.

Here we go.

Thank you.

-Thank you.
-You're welcome.

So I won my trial last week.

The class action suit.

-Oh, I am so sorry, Ash.
I didn't even ask.
-It's fine.

-Congratulations.
-Thank you.

I am such a self-absorbed
asshole.

You're Molly-absorbed asshole.

It's just that I don't
have to worry about you.

No rush, whenever you're ready.

-Thank you.
-Thank you.

Oh, my God.

I think I left
my wallet at home.

-I think I can buy us
a cup of coffee, Mom.
-Fuck! You're right.

-I-I gotta go.
-Mom, I'm sure it's fine.

It's probably under
the pillow or something.

No. How could I
possibly forget it?

No. Relax. You, you just said
she was doing good.

Remember?

Please let it go. Please.

Okay.

So, um, how...

-How's your boyfriend?
-Oh.

-Gone. Good riddance.
-Oh.

He was so clingy.

But I have a new boyfriend.

I met him up Rachel Nixon's
engagement party.

And he owns
his own plumbing company.

He's funny, you know,
which is always great, right?

And we're, without
giving too much away,
very in sync, intimately.

But there is one catch
if it's going to last

because he says that we're...

Door One.

-Hey.
-Hey.

The blue Caribbean
and the pearl green...

Any one of these
would be totally captivating...

You okay?

Yeah.

You look like shit.
You should really chill.

Yeah. Okay, so, um...

I guess some of you
may have heard
about the heroin epidemic.

Um...

So, I, uh...

I was a straight A student
who never graduated high school.

I live at home with my mom,

but last week I was
sleeping on the streets.

Don't have a job.

Or any job skills
or a dollar to my name.

Some of my teeth
aren't even mine.

See that, um,
that lady in the back.

It's my mom.

She drove me here today

because I, uh...
my license was suspended
because of so many DUIs.

But even if I did
have my license,

she wouldn't trust me
with her car.

Because I have...

I have robbed her blind.

Money, jewelry, credit cards.

And I have...

degraded myself

for drugs, in ways...

In ways that you don't
want to know.

The only thing...

The only thing
I care about
is getting high

because getting high
makes me forget

about the mess that I have made
of my life getting high.

Then just don't.

Excuse me?

Sorry. It's just...

I would never
let myself fall that far.

Right. Right,
of course.

Do you know how many times
that I have told myself that?

That I'm not going to
let myself steal to get high?

That I'm not gonna
let myself lose custody
of my children to get high?

That I'm not gonna let myself
stab a needle into my arm?

I'm not going to let myself
stab it into my chest.

I have woken up
almost every morning

for the past couple of years
and told myself

that this is it.
That today...

Today I'm not going to get high.

And an hour, an hour later,
I am meeting up with my dealer

to get high.

I fail every single day.

I'm so sorry, Mom.

Oh, my God.

I haven't seen you like that
for so long.

Like what?

Confident, honest.
Taking full responsibility.

Just... I don't know.
Just being yourself.

You should have seen
the way they were
looking at you.

Just riveted.

Yeah, I feel good.

Strong.

If there's anyone
who has the strength
to break free of this shit,

it's you.

I really believe that.

I'm proud of you.

Can you make a right up here?

What for?

I want to show you something.

Pull over right here.

-Here?
-Yeah.

You see that building
over there?

Eric and I used to live there.

For how long?

Year, year and a half.

Were you terrified?

I was high.

Did you have
running water at least?

Yeah, and room service.
Come on.

You know, I've been wanting
to ask you something,

but I do not want you
to take it in the wrong way.

Yeah.
-I just... No judgement.

Okay. Just come out with it.

Did you ever...

prostitute yourself?

I never had sex for money,

but I have had sex for drugs.

-Well, that's not prostitution.
-Well...

No, that's survival.

That's, uh, a sick person
trying to survive.

Yeah, but if I had
had sex for money
to buy drugs,

would that make me a prostitute?

So what's the verdict, Mom?

Whore? Not whore?

Wait, wait, wait, sorry.

Since we're already here,
I meant to ask you,

can we go and find
a friend of mine?

Her name is Sammy,
we used to live together
sometimes.

-Who?
-Sammy?

We used to look out
for each other.

She texted me two days ago
from someone else's phone,

and then she just vanished.

I think that she's in trouble.

Look, I want to go help her.

-No, I don't want to stay.
-Come on, Mom, I would
just like to help her.

We're already here--
She's 15, Mom, she's 15.

This isn't one of your schemes.

You are so close
to getting that shot.

Mom, look at me.

I'm doing good.

I just want to build momentum.

I want to start helping people,
to just start making up

for all the shit that I have
put everybody through.

That's all.

Please. I am begging you.
Just give me 15 minutes.

Fine, five minutes.
I know where she lives.

Mom, maybe if she sees me
doing good, it will help
her get help.

Please.

-Five minutes.
-Okay, five minutes.

Let's go.

-Five minutes.
-Okay?

She texted you.
How did she even
get your phone number?

-You're shopping?
-Excuse me?

Are you buying?
You looking for a fix?

Do I look like I'm shopping?

Oh, shit. Mrs. Wheeler.

It's me, Eric.
Molly's old boyfriend.

-Jesus, Eric.
-What are you doing here?

Molly's in there.

She's just looking for a friend.

She's clean, so
stay away from her.

Oh...

Oh, I don't think
that she wants to see me.

I haven't seen her
since she was pregnant.

She warned me at the clinic.

Oh, shit.

She didn't tell you.

Of course she did.

You wouldn't happen to have
a couple of dollars
that I could borrow.

Mrs. Wheeler, I'm hungry.

Molly, come on!

-Hey.
-Get in the car.

They said that she's
staying down the street.

I'm just gonna go
and check real quick.

No way. Are you crazy?

Does Sammy even exist?

Fuck you!

Get in the goddamn car!

Just get in the car!

Molly! Please!

I'll leave you!

You think I fucking
give a shit?

Watch me!

You fucking ungrateful bitch!

Moly, what the fuck are you--

Molly, I am so done
with your fucking--

-What are you doing here?
-This is Sammy.

I'm just trying
to get her temperature down.

-What you got in your hand?
-She's dope sick
with drugs.

-Come with me right now.
-Calm the fuck down.

-Stop it!
-What the fuck!

-What are you doing here?
-Who are you?

Do you think I'm scared of you?

No! No, no!

You fucked up!
You got me fucked up now.

-Greg, that's my mom. Stop!
-What? What?

You people are monsters,
you hear me?

-You deserve to die.
I'll kill you myself!
-What is wrong with you?

You almost got
both of us killed.

Jesus! You are unhinged!
You are scaring me!

Now know what it's like.

I was just trying
to help Sammy.

I saw Eric today.

Who?

Guitar Eric, your boyfriend.

-Where?
-Outside that flop house.

He came over to the car
trying to sell me some drugs.

Mom, I swear to God,
I did not know
that he was there.

If you think that I was trying
to scheme you, I wasn't.

He...

He said something
about you being pregnant.

I'm not judging you.

Eric said you...
you didn't want him
to be with you.

I'm just sorry that you had
to go through that alone.

An abortion is hard enough
as it is.

I didn't have an abortion,
I carried it to term.

Spent seven months
puking every morning

from morning sickness
and withdrawals

and staying on couches.

That was hardest thing
I've ever done.

Beautiful baby though.

A boy.

Where is he?

In New Jersey,
with a family
in their forties.

No kids, rich enough
to have a boat.

That's what
the agency told me.

When-- When did this happen?

Why didn't you call me?

Because I didn't want
another thing
to feel shitty about.

What's his name?

I don't know.

Can I meet him?
Do you get visits?

No. It's a closed adoption
just like I wanted.

Well, can I write them a letter?

No!

Molly, that's my grandson.

Yeah, hello.

Yeah, this is Molly.

We already scheduled
the shot with Dr. Ortiz
for 9:00 a.m. tomorrow.

No, no, no, I can't wait.

No!

Can you, can you please
just talk to Dr. Ortiz?

Because he knows
that this is urgent.

Please.

Oh, my God! Are you serious?

Stop!

Okay.

Yeah, we'll see you on Monday.

Okay. So what was that?

Three more days.

Three more days
that they're waiting

-for my insurance papers
to go through.
-That's bullshit.

I don't think I can make it.

Do you have any fucking idea
how hard it is for us

to get through one goddamn day?

Three days is a death sentence.

-It's an eternity.
-Jesus, you're not helping.

Insurance companies.
They run the fucking world.

Why didn't I hear
your phone ring?

-What?
-Your phone?

Why didn't I hear it ring?

Because it was on vibrate.

Why is the office still open?

It's after six o'clock.

-I don't know.
-I want to see your phone.

-Give me your phone.
-Are you fucking crazy?

-Am I crazy?
-Yes.

How many fake phone calls
have you made
since you hurt your knee?

Or did you ever even
hurt your knee?

-Must've been lies
from the very beginning.
-You serious?

Are you doing this
to me right now?

-Oh, my God.
-Just never ends.

No! You're such a trigger!

But it just goes on and on.

I am so sorry

that my drug addiction

is so incredibly difficult
on you.

Look, I, I am not going to
make it to Monday
if I stay here.

I'm gonna go to Sean's,
I'm gonna go stay with Sean.

He--he said that he can
pick me up.

It will be good.
I can see the kids.

I could be with the kids--
-What Sean?

The same Sean
who wanted you
to score for him?

Do you hear yourself?

I mean, do you fucking
hear yourself?

Do you?

If I say it's sunny outside,
are you gonna go and check?

I might have to.

Well, then, maybe
when I'm dead,

you can tell yourself,
"Hmm, she's just pretending."

All right.

Do what you're gonna do.

So, uh...

I'll see you Monday at 8:00.

Yes.

I love you.

You all right?

Yeah.

You okay?

Yeah.

You can't
go down the hole
with her every time, Deb.

You got to put yourself first.

You know, sometimes
it just...

Sometimes, I feel
that you're patronizing me.

-Really?
-Yeah.

Just feeding me
pat little phrases.

-Does that make you happy?
-Okay.

Oh, don't fucking walk away.

Well, say something.

You're such a wimp.

What?

What, Chris? Say something.

Saint fucking Chris.

You wanna have a fight,
is that it?

Huh?

You want-- You want us
to have a knockdown,
drag out fight

so you can blow off
some fucking steam?

I'm not your fucking
punching bag, Deb!

I'm not your fucking
punching bag!

Oh, God!

-I'm sorry.
-Stop.

-I'm sorry.
-Just stop apologizing,
it's annoying.

How did I get here?

What did I do?

Nothing.

You...

You...

have done nothing.

You know, maybe it's just
the way her brain is wired.

You know?

Maybe she'd taken the pills
the year before,

or a year after, she wouldn't
have gotten hooked.

But she needed to be high
because she was too sensitive,
but not...

sensitive enough or if you'd
stayed in your bad marriage,

she would have been
an even bigger addict.

Or if you bought her
those blue shoes that time

when she was three,
instead of the red.

It's none of that.

Because maybe,
the moment her father's sperm
reached your egg,

she was already an addict,
waiting to happen.

Okay.

Thank you.

...never ends.

I still get panic attacks
when there's a siren.

Even one on TV.

Every time the phone rings,
my heart stops.

My old ring tone
makes me pee, literally.

I was at the pharmacy
and the lady next to me,

had it on her phone,
I nearly wet myself
when I heard it.

This new shrink diagnosed me
with chronic anxiety.

He wants
to give me something
to help me sleep.

I said I can't keep pills
at the house.

So I keep them at work.

Take one pill home
every evening.

Let go and let God...

This too shall pass.

Time takes time.

It helps me...

to believe
in these platitudes.

I'd be even more resentful
and angry

if I didn't repeat
this stuff to myself.

I'd be furious...

for all, all the dead dreams.

At the tone,
please record your message.

Hey, I hope you're having fun
with the kids.

I'm just checking in with
with you about tomorrow.

Um, I'm really happy
you're doing this.

I know it's not been
an easy week,

and I can be a real hard-ass.

It's just that...

someday, I want things
to be easier for you, you know?

You deserve good things.

All right. So, um, bye,
call me back.

I love you.

Dale, pick up the fucking phone.

Hey, this is Dale.
Leave a message... or don't.

-[BEEP]
-Damn it!

-What the fuck?

-Do you know what time it is?
-Is he here?

Dale.

Fuck.

Have you heard from Molly?

No. Why?

Why?

Oh, Jesus Christ.
Did you even bother to call her?

Why the hell not?

This is your daughter's life.

Because I can't control it, Deb.

Oh, come on, Dale.

She's one day away
from getting a shot that might
actually save her life.

And God knows where she is
and you don't give a shit.

I give a shit.

I give a shit.
There's not a day that goes by
that I don't think about her.

But it's not up to me
to change any of that.

And God knows I've fooled myself
time and time again before.

And so did you.

-I'm done.
-Oh, God. That's so convenient.

I thought you said that you
weren't gonna let her back in
until she was clean.

-She's been clean a week.
-Oh.

Oh, boy. Well, when it's real,
you let me know.

So you want us
to do all the work?

You're not doing
the fucking work, Deb.

She's doing it.
If in fact, she's even doing it.

So don't fucking
flatter yourself here.

By the way,
you're not going to make me
feel guilty about this either,

so why don't you kiss my ass?

You know what? We wouldn't even
be standing here

if you paid more attention
to her when she got that injury.

You wanna say this is my fault?

Is that the game
you want to play?

Let's. You walked out on us
because you wanted
to find the new you.

She wanted her mom back,
she wanted her mom's attention,

and that's exactly what
she friggin' got, didn't she?

Fuck, you, Dale!

Save the speeches
for her funeral.

Oh, you're planning
her funeral now, huh?

You have a flair
for drama there, don't you, Deb?

Whoa, whoa, whoa...

Any news?

Mm-mm.

-[BEEP]
-Door...

-Where the hell have you been?
-Hey!

What the fuck?

I've been trying to call you.

My phone died.

Why aren't you ready?

We have to be there
in, like, 45 minutes.

All right.

Come on.

Okay, I'm almost there.

How are the kids?

They're good.

Yeah, they, um...

They say hi.

What?

Um...

I need your pee.

What?

I said I need your pee, like,
in a plastic container.

I need your pee, now.

Do I have to
spell it out for you?

I'm not clean.

The other day when
when we went looking
for Sammy, I, um...

I met up with a dealer.

With what money?

Oh.

You fucking thief.

And the appointment?

I faked it.

I'm sorry.

And the weekend,
visiting the kids?

No, I saw them.

I did. I even took them
to the movies, but then, um...

Then Sean and I got a sitter
and we went out, uh...

I got high.

I'm sorry I suck.

I'm a terrible person.

I am a fucking moron.

No, no, because I'm here now.

Look, I could have
stayed back at Sean's,

or met back up with Eric
or just disappeared.

But... But I didn't...

I don't want to do this
anymore, okay?

Please. I just want
to get the shot.

-Well, you can't, Molly.
It's over.
-Yes, I can.

You have drugs in your system.

Maybe you could
wait for another week.

I am not gonna make it
another week,

and you and I both know that.

Mom, please.

Please, just give me your pee.

If you give me your pee,
I can pass the drug test.

I can get the shot.

And that means
that I can't get high
for an entire month.

No, you, you have drugs
in your system.

-No.
-Mom, please.

Please, I am begging you
for help to get clean.

Look, this could be it, okay?

It's like what you said
on the message last night

about this being the start
of something new.

It is.

I thought your phone was dead.

Fuck.

Oh.

Thank you.

Oh, my God.

What if they check
the temperature of the pee?

-What?
-The pee was barely lukewarm.

What if they check...

Why am I freaking out?

-Well, don't.

Okay.

Everything here looks good.

Ready to go?

Yeah.

-Uh, I'll step out.
-No.

Mm-mm.

All right.

All set.

What?

How are you feeling?

Fine. Yeah.

All right.

You'll get a follow up call
at the end of the day
to see how you're doing.

I'll see you in a month.
Congratulations.

Thank you.

Oh, my God.

I'm okay.

I am. I, um...

I feel good.

-Yeah?
-Yeah.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

Oh, my God. You look good.

-Yeah.
-I can't believe it.

Thirty days without having
to worry about this nightmare.

Yeah.

Can't believe
I went through with it.

Pretty damn brave.

Oh, my God.

I always knew
your talent for lying would,
you know, come in handy.

We fucking pulled it off.

You hungry?

Wanna grab some breakfast?

What?

Oh, my God! Get in the car.
Get in the car. Quick.

-Oh, my God!
-Here. Quick, quick.
Get in. Get in.

-Can you close the door?
Get in.

-Let me just get...
-Don't fucking touch me. Fuck!

Oh, my God.

Oh, just fucking drive.

God. Just drive!

Oh!

I can't. I can't...

Oh, my God. I can't. I can't...

I know, I know, I know...

Why did we do this?

Oh, why the fuck did we do this?

Can we have some
help out here, please?

Anyone? I need some help.

-Please, somebody help us.

She's in acute withdrawal.

-Heroin?
-Yes, heroin.

Just get us back there.
I've never seen her like this.

We can restrain her.
We can give her fluids.

But she's gonna
have to go through it.

She just had
the Naltrexone shot.

She's not supposed to get that
if she has drugs in her system.

No shit, Sherlock.

Doctor, please, can you help?
She's in acute withdrawal.

Miss, can you sign this form?

-But, ma'am,
she has to sign herself.

-She can't sign it.
-Fine!

-Okay, we'll call you.

Seriously?

-It's okay. Okay. It's okay.

Oh. Oh, Mom, please,
make it stop.

Can we have some
fucking help here?

-Make it stop.
-I know, I know.

-Here.
-Thank you.

I'm begging you.

-No.
-I'm so sorry, Mom.

Please, I can't do this.

-Yes, you can.

Are you enjoying this?

I don't fucking
believe you people.

She's been convulsing and puking
for, I don't know how long.

What does it take to get seen?

It is called a waiting room
for a reason.

-Sometimes you wait.
-There's no one else here.

We take people
based on the complaint

and some thing's demand
more immediate attention.

Thank you for your compassion.

Do you want to know
why she's an addict?

It's because of you people.

So don't you sit there

-and fucking tell me...
-Hey, whoa! Whoa!

Is everything okay?

-Doctor, please.
-Molly Wheeler.

Oh... Okay, sweetie.

-The doctor's here.
-I got it.

-He's gonna take good care
of you, all right?
-Thank you.

We're gonna take
real good care of you.

Ma.

-Ma.
-I'm here. I'm here, sweetie.

Mom, don't leave.

-Hey.
-Hey.

How are the kids?

They're good.

You know, Cory's still
got that cold.

Chloe never got it.

I don't get it. That kid
lives off of junk food.

And never gets sick.

Kids are indestructible.

Hey, so, um...

Sean wants me to come back again
on Friday and watch the kids.

I think it's good, you know,
him trusting me more.

Mm-hm.

Say, isn't Friday when you
need to get your shot?

Yes, but it's no big deal.

They said they can see me
first thing next week.

-Are you sure?
-Mm-hm.

-You called them?
-Yes.

Yeah. Monday, three o'clock.

What?

Uh...

Nothing.

Not a thing.

You look wonderful.