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1
00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:55,880
I thought you two were breaking up!
2
00:00:56,600 --> 00:00:59,640
We are. We definitely...
3
00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:07,120
- Have you got it on right?
- Yes.
4
00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:10,960
- Are you sure?
- Yes.
5
00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:28,520
Right. I'd better go.
6
00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:31,360
You know because...
7
00:01:32,440 --> 00:01:34,360
You said I should.
8
00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:02,240
Thanks. It's a one-time thing.
9
00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:04,800
- Obviously.
- Obviously.
10
00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:12,200
- You're not gonna do your usual
taking him back thing, are you? - No.
11
00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:16,040
Are you sure? That's what
normally happens about now.
12
00:02:16,075 --> 00:02:17,920
You panic and take him back.
13
00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:20,360
Get dressed, evil spawn.
14
00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:25,760
Eugh. Eugh. You're welcome.
15
00:02:37,320 --> 00:02:39,760
Hey. Thought you might want a better
view.
16
00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:46,920
None of our friends have ever split
up. Clint and Sally, Clint and Brend
17
00:02:46,955 --> 00:02:49,960
Clint and the stripper whose name
I've forgotten on principle.
18
00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:54,000
None of our friends who live this
close have ever split up before.
19
00:02:54,035 --> 00:02:56,125
Apart from Clint, obviously.
20
00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:58,840
What about the last two times Babs
and Dickie split up?
21
00:02:58,875 --> 00:03:00,720
That was different, I think. Why?
22
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:04,400
Because there was no Winnebago
involved before.
23
00:03:04,435 --> 00:03:06,280
Well, yeah. Let that be a lesson to
you.
24
00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:09,120
Oh, thanks. You're welcome.
25
00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:12,440
What's the lesson?
26
00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:33,200
I cannot believe I agreed to this.
27
00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:39,320
Mind the Beemer.
28
00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:42,360
Mind the B... Mind the...!
29
00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:48,520
Oh, well, thanks!
Thank you very much!
30
00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:52,120
- Thank you very much!
- You're welcome.
31
00:04:00,520 --> 00:04:03,765
Oh! Dab of T-Cut will
sort that, bro.
32
00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:06,760
Can you not park this inverted skip
outside Eddie's?
33
00:04:06,795 --> 00:04:09,005
Whoa. Well, that's ambulance access.
34
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:12,200
Anyway, it's only for a few days
till Babs lets me move back in.
35
00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:15,800
Are you sure about that? Yeah, she's
just a bit crotchety.
36
00:04:17,440 --> 00:04:19,960
Trick is, right, let her anger blow
itself out...
37
00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:22,725
I'll play along...
38
00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:24,960
and I'll remind her of all the good
times...
39
00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:28,040
and give her lady garden some
serious attention.
40
00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:32,565
That always does the trick. As
long as you have a foolproof plan.
41
00:04:32,600 --> 00:04:36,840
My front grille needs replacing by the
end of the day. Righto. Lend us 50 quid.
42
00:04:36,875 --> 00:04:40,120
Why? Cos your front grille needs
replacing by the end of the day.
43
00:04:41,840 --> 00:04:43,880
Look at my shoulder.
44
00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:50,540
Hey, it's been a while since we
played paramedics and patients.
45
00:04:50,575 --> 00:04:54,120
Well, you seem OK but I'd
be happy if you had a scan.
46
00:04:54,155 --> 00:04:56,245
Yeah, well, don't be such an old
woman.
47
00:04:56,280 --> 00:04:59,520
It's fine. It was nothing. Take a few
more days off.
48
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:03,080
It's my Saturday off. We could spend
it together.
49
00:05:03,115 --> 00:05:05,245
We could sort tons of wedding stuff.
50
00:05:05,280 --> 00:05:08,200
Oh, um...
I'll just get the phone.
51
00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:13,685
Fian-cee. Fian-see.
52
00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:16,040
Fian-see? How do you say it?
53
00:05:16,075 --> 00:05:18,045
Like Beyonce.
54
00:05:18,080 --> 00:05:19,960
Have you met my fiance Beyonce?
55
00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:23,160
Like that's ever going to happen.
So that's ironic.
56
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:26,245
Goes small. I know, it just goes
vroom.
57
00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:28,960
All right. I'll call later. All
right. Bye, bye, bye.
58
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:31,845
So you're going in?
59
00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:34,285
- I can't. I've been suspended.
- What?
60
00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:37,360
- That was my union rep.
- I thought the geezer started it.
61
00:05:37,395 --> 00:05:41,005
I... He's suing.
Me and the shelter.
62
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:44,640
He attacked you. I know. And you beat
the crap out of him in self-defence.
63
00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:49,080
I mean, you know, it'll be fine.
It'll be fine.
64
00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,740
Meanwhile my fists have been
designated
65
00:05:52,775 --> 00:05:55,000
too lethal for professional
engagements.
66
00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:59,120
Oh, we could spend the day planning
the wedding. Yeah...great.
67
00:05:59,155 --> 00:06:02,000
Guys, go to the shop. Get your mum
every wedding mag.
68
00:06:02,035 --> 00:06:04,125
OK, Dad. I want venues, cakes,
69
00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:07,440
those funny things you wear in your
lapels. Go. How cool is this?
70
00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:10,680
Very, very cool.
71
00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:30,720
What's up? Boxing things up.
72
00:06:30,755 --> 00:06:32,965
I can't cope. Yeah, me neither.
73
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,440
I've just been suspended for doing
my job.
74
00:06:35,475 --> 00:06:38,160
What shall we do? Bike therapy. Now.
75
00:06:38,195 --> 00:06:40,080
OK. See you in a mo.
76
00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:10,920
Ring my phone. What? Ring my phone.
77
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:13,640
I don't think it's working properly.
78
00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:22,680
Abbey still not called then? No.
79
00:07:23,960 --> 00:07:26,125
This is ridiculous. It's been a
week.
80
00:07:26,160 --> 00:07:29,840
No email, no text. She's not even
accepted me as a Facebook friend.
81
00:07:29,875 --> 00:07:32,400
Be nice, you lot said.
Nice girls like nice men.
82
00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:36,000
Yeah, well, maybe pretending
to be nice isn't enough, Clint.
83
00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:39,020
Why am I even asking
you for advice?
84
00:07:39,055 --> 00:07:41,440
Isn't Babs about to throw all
your possessions into a skip?
85
00:07:41,475 --> 00:07:43,605
Yeah, I better get round there.
86
00:07:43,640 --> 00:07:46,480
Maybe it's more of a spring
clean than an eviction.
87
00:07:46,515 --> 00:07:48,560
You know, could be... Oh, what's the
word?
88
00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:51,365
Cathartic.
89
00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:54,040
Anyway, it's not over till she's got
the key back.
90
00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:56,400
Course not.
91
00:07:57,320 --> 00:07:59,485
No-one said it'd be easy.
92
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:03,480
You did. You should know better than
to listen to me on important stuff.
93
00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:06,440
I've just been boxing up all this...
94
00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:09,885
...this history. Can you really leave
someone
95
00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:12,805
just because they're a bit lazy and
crap with money?
96
00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:16,160
No, but you can leave them because
they are epic in their laziness
97
00:08:16,195 --> 00:08:18,040
and brutally bad with money.
98
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:20,400
I'm drowning, Lil. I love him.
99
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,240
But the water's closed
over my head and I just...
100
00:08:23,275 --> 00:08:25,160
I know.
101
00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:30,600
I'll be fine. I'll be fine.
102
00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:33,720
As long as I don't let him...
103
00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:43,920
OK, since you've stopped using actual
out-loud words I'm going to go.
104
00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:49,040
Cos, you know, Eddie's turned into
Jordan for reasons unknown.
105
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:53,640
And there are pink thrones and
pumpkin bridal carriages to be avoided.
106
00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:57,760
So...give me a call if you get into a
real pickle.
107
00:08:58,680 --> 00:09:01,160
OK. Bye, baby. Bye.
108
00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:10,080
Is that you, Lils? You're needed.
109
00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,645
Clint needs help. Aw. Tell me about
it.
110
00:09:16,680 --> 00:09:19,840
Ha, ha! You've got to help me go
to the next level with Abbey.
111
00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,800
I tried the sappy, John-Boy
112
00:09:23,835 --> 00:09:26,840
Walton 'kissing then walking away so
she thinks I'm a gentleman' business.
113
00:09:26,875 --> 00:09:29,205
- And what have I got?
- What you richly deserve?
114
00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:32,200
Shut up and give me advice.
You can lord it over me later.
115
00:09:32,235 --> 00:09:34,685
You're good with girls.
What do you normally do?
116
00:09:34,720 --> 00:09:37,685
He gets them so drunk that
their knickers just fall off.
117
00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:41,680
Or promise them a job in the huge
international ad agency he pretends he owns.
118
00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:45,080
You're Batman without your utility
belt.
119
00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:48,240
Forget it. I'll work it out myself.
120
00:09:48,275 --> 00:09:50,120
Cook.
121
00:09:55,080 --> 00:09:57,000
- What?
- Cook.
122
00:09:57,400 --> 00:09:59,565
Dinner. Have a dinner party.
123
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:02,320
Introduce her to your friends.
Nice girls like that.
124
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:04,680
Do they?
125
00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:09,320
Well, she'll have to like something
else.
126
00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:13,560
Clint don't cook. Cutting stuff up
and heating it. How hard can it be?
127
00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:16,445
I'll just call her and take her to
Honey's.
128
00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:19,560
That's where we met.
That's romantic, isn't it?
129
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:22,325
What do you two know
about it anyway?
130
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:25,240
Neither of you have
scored since sixth form.
131
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:29,680
Love you.
132
00:10:40,760 --> 00:10:42,805
- Hi.
- Hi, Clint.
133
00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:47,680
That's a relief. I was worried you might be
hanging in a dungeon suspended by your thumbs.
134
00:10:47,715 --> 00:10:51,080
That would have been more fun than
the week I've actually had.
135
00:10:51,115 --> 00:10:52,960
Oh, well, how about
I cheer you up then?
136
00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:55,900
I could take you to Honey's.
We could sink a few Manhattans,
137
00:10:55,935 --> 00:10:58,200
maybe throw a couple of moves.
138
00:10:58,235 --> 00:11:01,560
Tempting but the last time I was
there I was hit on by this sleazy guy.
139
00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:04,560
Well, I'll be there to
protect you this time.
140
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:06,760
You were there last time.
141
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,565
OK, no Honey's.
142
00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:11,760
- There's lots of other things
we could do. - Like?
143
00:11:14,280 --> 00:11:17,160
Dinner. How about I cook
you dinner? Just you and me.
144
00:11:17,195 --> 00:11:19,285
Just you and me.
145
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:22,600
Oh, and Babs and Lillie
from the party.
146
00:11:22,635 --> 00:11:25,080
And their partners, of course.
147
00:11:25,880 --> 00:11:27,760
Husbands, fiances.
148
00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:33,000
Long-term partners. All...all
eating...dinner which I will cook...
149
00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:36,320
er...at my house...tonight.
150
00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:39,600
- You cook, do you?
- Oh, yeah, all the time.
151
00:11:39,635 --> 00:11:41,597
I'm a homebody essentially.
152
00:11:41,632 --> 00:11:43,560
I'm highly domesticated.
153
00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:46,960
- So you'll come?
- OK.
154
00:11:47,520 --> 00:11:50,280
OK, well, I'll go off
and buy some...
155
00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:52,440
um...some er...
156
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:54,645
Ingredients?
157
00:11:54,680 --> 00:11:56,640
That's the fella. OK, bye.
158
00:12:06,700 --> 00:12:09,740
I tried to stop him buying them
all but Dad gave him 30 quid.
159
00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:12,420
30 quid for...these?
160
00:12:12,980 --> 00:12:15,100
You said you wanted
to start planning.
161
00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:17,265
Yeah, no, I do, I do.
162
00:12:17,300 --> 00:12:20,780
I've also taken the liberty of
drawing up some suggestions myself.
163
00:12:21,940 --> 00:12:24,105
Oh, that's lovely. Yeah.
164
00:12:24,140 --> 00:12:27,420
Oh, I'll definitely have a look at
those...later.
165
00:13:04,540 --> 00:13:06,705
You need to give me that key. Hey,
whoa.
166
00:13:06,740 --> 00:13:09,500
Don't touch the hot bills drawer
without oven gloves.
167
00:13:09,535 --> 00:13:11,380
That thing'll singe you.
168
00:13:12,220 --> 00:13:14,385
Hey, some of them are for presents.
169
00:13:14,420 --> 00:13:16,700
It's not proper to see what a man's
spent.
170
00:13:16,735 --> 00:13:18,980
How could this be... Don't flip out,
Babs.
171
00:13:19,500 --> 00:13:21,665
There's two, three...
172
00:13:21,700 --> 00:13:24,420
There's nearly £4,000 in unpaid
debt.
173
00:13:25,460 --> 00:13:27,700
It was just a few circuit boards,
you know,
174
00:13:27,735 --> 00:13:29,620
and a lucky poker run and...
175
00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:32,460
the odd romantic gesture.
176
00:13:33,660 --> 00:13:36,740
Nobody could accuse you of being
unromantic, it's just...
177
00:13:37,780 --> 00:13:40,860
We could never afford romantic gestures. We can't afford unromantic ones
- like food and new clothes.
178
00:13:40,895 --> 00:13:43,940
We could never afford romantic gestures. We can't afford unromantic ones
- like food and new clothes.
179
00:13:43,975 --> 00:13:46,505
What you could be accused of is not
understanding
180
00:13:46,540 --> 00:13:50,300
that not opening red bills does not
make them vaporise. Here it comes.
181
00:13:50,335 --> 00:13:52,180
Yes, here it does come.
182
00:13:52,820 --> 00:13:54,740
Do you know you're...
183
00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:57,380
You're a genius, actually.
184
00:13:58,220 --> 00:14:00,100
You somehow make me...
185
00:14:00,780 --> 00:14:02,740
seem like the shrew.
186
00:14:03,740 --> 00:14:07,540
Everybody loves the sweet, romantic,
spontaneous Dickie.
187
00:14:07,575 --> 00:14:10,997
What is it with Babs
and her sense of humour failure?
188
00:14:11,032 --> 00:14:14,420
Yeah, what is it with that? Hm?
Money doesn't matter.
189
00:14:14,900 --> 00:14:16,820
Only love matters. Screw you.
190
00:14:18,380 --> 00:14:20,300
Screw you for saying that.
191
00:14:22,780 --> 00:14:24,940
Money doesn't matter, only love
matters?
192
00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:29,480
Until love is crushed to a bloody
mashed pulp
193
00:14:29,515 --> 00:14:32,260
by the constant, crippling, endless
fear.
194
00:14:32,780 --> 00:14:34,700
The fear of every phone call,
195
00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:37,660
every letter, every knock on the
door.
196
00:14:38,060 --> 00:14:41,900
Until love is so sick of seeing
everybody else better themselves.
197
00:14:44,935 --> 00:14:46,860
Only love matters.
198
00:14:48,180 --> 00:14:50,820
Until you spend the love behind the
back of the person
199
00:14:50,855 --> 00:14:52,740
you're supposed to be loving.
200
00:15:15,980 --> 00:15:17,780
Dickie.
201
00:15:28,500 --> 00:15:30,545
Yes. Right, pay attention.
202
00:15:30,580 --> 00:15:32,940
I need you to drag Babs, by the hair
if necessary,
203
00:15:32,975 --> 00:15:34,780
to mine tonight at eight o'clock.
204
00:15:35,580 --> 00:15:38,865
I don't see that happening. You've
got to persuade her.
205
00:15:38,900 --> 00:15:42,300
Abbey liked Babs, liked that you'd
been together so long. Make her come.
206
00:15:42,980 --> 00:15:45,340
Ed and Lillie are coming. I need you
two, too.
207
00:15:45,980 --> 00:15:49,220
That's my new brand. I'm a guy who
hangs out with stable couples
208
00:15:49,255 --> 00:15:51,100
and is into being a couple stably.
209
00:15:52,260 --> 00:15:54,860
Eight. Actually, make it
7:30 so I can brief you.
210
00:15:55,300 --> 00:15:58,260
Clint, Clint, we are in the middle
of splitting up.
211
00:15:58,540 --> 00:16:00,460
I'll give you 50 quid.
212
00:16:02,660 --> 00:16:05,260
- Make it 200.
- 100 is my final offer.
213
00:16:09,980 --> 00:16:11,820
Lillie.
214
00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:15,260
- Hello.
- Hi.
215
00:16:15,620 --> 00:16:19,500
Turns out your dinner suggestion
wasn't completely stupid.
216
00:16:19,535 --> 00:16:22,745
- Apology accepted?
- Tonight, 7:30?
217
00:16:22,780 --> 00:16:26,380
Do you want me to come and help you
hide the evidence? What evidence?
218
00:16:26,415 --> 00:16:29,980
The evidence that says this flat is
owned by a irretrievable shag hound.
219
00:16:37,700 --> 00:16:40,980
They're all in my name, the debts.
It won't be a problem for you.
220
00:16:41,580 --> 00:16:45,060
Until they declare you bankrupt and
Gina and I get kicked out.
221
00:16:45,095 --> 00:16:47,580
Is that all this is, really? A money
thing?
222
00:16:54,820 --> 00:16:56,820
Clint wants us to pretend to be
happy...
223
00:16:57,780 --> 00:17:01,980
...at his dinner for this new girl,
Abbey, as a favour.
224
00:17:02,620 --> 00:17:06,380
I can manage that. I've got good at
pretending to be happy over the years.
225
00:17:12,940 --> 00:17:15,345
Hey. Hey. Are you kidding?
226
00:17:15,380 --> 00:17:17,260
I wouldn't miss this for the world.
227
00:17:18,740 --> 00:17:21,860
I had a bit of a go myself so
there's probably not that much
228
00:17:21,895 --> 00:17:23,900
to throw away.
229
00:17:23,935 --> 00:17:25,905
Ah. Let's see.
230
00:17:25,940 --> 00:17:28,740
Surely not in the drawer by the bed?
231
00:17:30,220 --> 00:17:32,180
Oh, good grief!
232
00:17:32,860 --> 00:17:36,580
You're a living, breathing insult to
all womankind. I'm a changed man.
233
00:17:37,060 --> 00:17:40,060
Sex toys presumably in the leather
bag under the bed?
234
00:17:40,095 --> 00:17:42,020
Damn, you're good.
235
00:17:44,260 --> 00:17:46,180
Sweet Jesus.
236
00:17:46,980 --> 00:17:49,145
Gosh, your winkie must have come
237
00:17:49,180 --> 00:17:51,540
as quite
a disappointment after all this lot.
238
00:17:52,980 --> 00:17:55,145
Winkie first, actually.
239
00:17:55,180 --> 00:17:58,100
I only use the toys if I can't be
bothered - Whoa. Enough.
240
00:17:58,135 --> 00:18:00,460
Can we not just store them? They're
expensive.
241
00:18:00,495 --> 00:18:02,505
'I'm a changed man.'
242
00:18:02,540 --> 00:18:04,705
Can I not just be largely reformed?
243
00:18:04,740 --> 00:18:08,260
- Dear Abbey, I thought you ought
to know... - All right, all right.
244
00:18:08,295 --> 00:18:10,620
OK. Now um... Oh, books.
245
00:18:15,020 --> 00:18:16,940
Dad. Yeah.
246
00:18:17,980 --> 00:18:20,300
Something's not right.
247
00:18:20,335 --> 00:18:22,620
Mum doesn't seem to want to work
on the wedding arrangements.
248
00:18:22,655 --> 00:18:26,540
Give her time. She's been off sick.
She's only just got the magazines.
249
00:18:26,575 --> 00:18:28,740
She didn't do anything all last week
either.
250
00:18:29,860 --> 00:18:33,420
Do you think we just...nagged her
into saying yes?
251
00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:39,105
Don't be daft, all right?
252
00:18:39,140 --> 00:18:41,700
She's probably just busy. She'll get
around to it.
253
00:18:41,735 --> 00:18:44,260
Every woman loves making wedding
arrangements.
254
00:18:44,295 --> 00:18:46,185
OK.
255
00:18:46,220 --> 00:18:49,260
But just in case you're wrong, which
you often are,
256
00:18:49,295 --> 00:18:51,740
I'll go and see what she's up to.
257
00:18:57,340 --> 00:19:00,980
Anything with sutra - bin. Sexpert
books - bin.
258
00:19:03,380 --> 00:19:05,880
And now for the wall...art.
259
00:19:05,915 --> 00:19:08,345
Not my Bob Carlos Clarke.
260
00:19:08,380 --> 00:19:12,740
Rubber-clad women with glass coffee tables
on their backs scream 'I'm a keeper'.
261
00:19:15,860 --> 00:19:17,780
Are you serious?
262
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:33,980
Mum.
263
00:19:35,140 --> 00:19:38,340
Dad and I wondered how the wedding
arrangements were going.
264
00:19:38,375 --> 00:19:40,425
I found out you were here and Dad
said,
265
00:19:40,460 --> 00:19:43,180
'Go rescue Mummy from Clint's
chateau of sleaze.'
266
00:19:43,215 --> 00:19:45,345
Well, he said castle
267
00:19:45,380 --> 00:19:48,700
but I thought chateau sounded
more...decadent.
268
00:19:50,580 --> 00:19:54,540
I'll be here for a while. No, stop,
while I still have some possessions.
269
00:19:54,575 --> 00:19:57,700
Do you not want me to help you with
your food? You hate cooking.
270
00:19:57,735 --> 00:20:00,500
That's true. I've seen those Paddy
meals that you make.
271
00:20:00,535 --> 00:20:03,900
Roast potatoes with mash
and...chips.
272
00:20:03,935 --> 00:20:05,865
I could help.
273
00:20:05,900 --> 00:20:07,820
- I'm an excellent cook.
- Really?
274
00:20:08,380 --> 00:20:10,705
Read them all - Jamie,
Nigella, Gordon.
275
00:20:10,740 --> 00:20:14,180
Right. Mary Whitehouse, you're out.
Dwarf Ramsay, you're up. Go.
276
00:20:15,260 --> 00:20:17,820
There's the ingredients. We're
having Italian.
277
00:20:25,700 --> 00:20:27,700
What about Betsy Reevey?
278
00:20:27,735 --> 00:20:29,665
All in your head.
279
00:20:29,700 --> 00:20:31,745
Tina 'Tits Out' Thompson?
280
00:20:31,780 --> 00:20:33,660
She was the one I left for you.
281
00:20:35,620 --> 00:20:39,620
Who, incidentally, didn't wear a bra
because she had sensitive nipples?
282
00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:42,060
From your relentless chewing on
them, I imagine.
283
00:20:43,740 --> 00:20:47,100
I have never in any way, shape or
form been unfaithful to you.
284
00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:51,580
But you've thought about it. Oh, for
crying out loud.
285
00:20:52,780 --> 00:20:56,620
Right, so all that pumping and preening
and more pumping, is for my benefit?
286
00:20:56,655 --> 00:20:58,465
Yes.
287
00:20:58,500 --> 00:21:00,665
- Yes?!
- Yes.
288
00:21:00,700 --> 00:21:02,780
I stay in shape to
look good for you.
289
00:21:04,540 --> 00:21:06,940
Because I love you.
290
00:21:08,300 --> 00:21:10,180
And I always have
and I always will.
291
00:21:11,140 --> 00:21:16,060
Except on the regular occasions when I want to
beat you to death with a recycling unit hopper.
292
00:21:16,095 --> 00:21:17,940
Well, that's nice...
293
00:21:18,580 --> 00:21:20,260
I suppose.
294
00:21:20,980 --> 00:21:22,980
But the money thing is still
enough...
295
00:21:23,820 --> 00:21:25,700
of a thing.
296
00:21:32,060 --> 00:21:34,940
Where are you going? The bottles go
in the bottle bank.
297
00:22:03,940 --> 00:22:05,940
Clint's having a dinner party
tonight.
298
00:22:06,940 --> 00:22:08,820
Thrilled to hear it.
299
00:22:11,020 --> 00:22:14,585
Seeing as your hormones have turned
you into the Incredible Sulk
300
00:22:14,620 --> 00:22:18,140
I thought I'd ask Gina to come over
and stop you and Joe fighting all night.
301
00:22:18,175 --> 00:22:20,020
OK.
302
00:22:23,140 --> 00:22:25,700
There's a lovely pageboy outfit
there.
303
00:22:26,380 --> 00:22:28,300
Should I order two?
304
00:22:28,740 --> 00:22:30,745
You're funny.
305
00:22:30,780 --> 00:22:32,660
You're a funny, funny lady.
306
00:22:36,260 --> 00:22:39,340
It's like the Rumble in the Jungle.
307
00:22:39,620 --> 00:22:42,420
Ali let Foreman punch himself into
exhaustion.
308
00:22:42,700 --> 00:22:44,860
Takes all the blows without replying
309
00:22:44,895 --> 00:22:46,740
then bam, he struck.
310
00:22:47,340 --> 00:22:49,505
That's your tactical role model, is
it?
311
00:22:49,540 --> 00:22:52,060
A man who got hit in the head till
he got Parkinson's.
312
00:22:52,095 --> 00:22:54,500
It's an analogy. Try and keep up.
313
00:22:54,535 --> 00:22:56,380
You're doomed. You're wrong.
314
00:22:57,540 --> 00:22:59,740
I'm just letting her shout herself
out.
315
00:22:59,775 --> 00:23:01,940
I'm trying not to do anything else
wrong,
316
00:23:02,580 --> 00:23:04,500
blow any more money.
317
00:23:05,180 --> 00:23:08,860
I'd better go in case an opportunity
comes up to do something nice.
318
00:23:08,895 --> 00:23:10,740
What - Oi. Oi!
319
00:23:21,180 --> 00:23:23,240
What - What -
320
00:23:23,275 --> 00:23:25,127
Oi! Oi! Joe!
321
00:23:29,140 --> 00:23:31,100
It's green, Joe.
322
00:23:31,460 --> 00:23:33,980
- So?
- It's supposed to be passata.
323
00:23:35,140 --> 00:23:37,465
I can't work with this negativity.
324
00:23:37,500 --> 00:23:41,540
Am I right in thinking that you've never
cooked anything before in your life?
325
00:23:41,575 --> 00:23:43,705
I don't see the relevance of that.
326
00:23:43,740 --> 00:23:47,720
And that your mum knew this when she
let you volunteer your expertise?
327
00:23:47,755 --> 00:23:51,700
Mum believes that a thorough
theoretical understanding of a subject
328
00:23:51,735 --> 00:23:54,620
is a worthy substitute for actual
hands-on experience.
329
00:23:54,655 --> 00:23:56,500
You're fired. See yourself out.
330
00:24:04,860 --> 00:24:06,625
Pissus offus.
331
00:24:06,660 --> 00:24:08,540
And take that bag out to the bins.
332
00:24:22,900 --> 00:24:26,520
They may come to this dinner party
and rediscover their love mojo.
333
00:24:26,555 --> 00:24:30,105
- Maybe it's just temporary.
- It's not. - It's just Babs and Dickie.
334
00:24:30,140 --> 00:24:34,100
- She loves to be cross. He's good at making
her cross. - Babs doesn't love to be cross.
335
00:24:34,135 --> 00:24:37,260
And everybody knows what great sex
they have. Ed, it's finished.
336
00:24:37,295 --> 00:24:39,265
How can you be so sure? Ed.
337
00:24:39,300 --> 00:24:41,340
- They are not us, OK?
- I never said...
338
00:24:41,375 --> 00:24:44,020
OK. You are cute to worry.
339
00:24:44,620 --> 00:24:47,620
- Annoying but cute. - I like
it when you think I'm cute.
340
00:24:47,655 --> 00:24:49,660
OK, now it's just annoying
more than cute.
341
00:24:51,060 --> 00:24:54,740
We are not getting unengaged because
other people are splitting up.
342
00:24:54,775 --> 00:24:57,145
- Maybe splitting up.
- Assuredly. - Possibly.
343
00:24:57,180 --> 00:24:59,620
Without question, without
doubt, without fail.
344
00:25:06,180 --> 00:25:07,785
Hey.
345
00:25:07,820 --> 00:25:09,740
We're OK, aren't we?
346
00:25:11,340 --> 00:25:13,220
You're such a girl.
347
00:25:21,860 --> 00:25:23,425
Hey.
348
00:25:23,460 --> 00:25:25,460
- All right, GothSheba?
- Hi, Sweaty Jock.
349
00:25:30,700 --> 00:25:32,860
- Mum's gonna crack.
- Mine too.
350
00:25:33,780 --> 00:25:37,500
I'll be wearing a pageboy outfit unless
I start a mag fire when I get home.
351
00:25:38,420 --> 00:25:41,820
You'll look sexy in short velvet
pants and a pudding-bowl snip.
352
00:25:42,860 --> 00:25:45,980
Really? Never been more serious
about anything in my life.
353
00:25:48,740 --> 00:25:51,500
So baby-sitting later? Yeah. Sorry
about that.
354
00:25:52,220 --> 00:25:56,460
Don't be. I'll try not to jump you and
steal your cherry on your mum and dad's sofa.
355
00:26:08,660 --> 00:26:11,580
That's a favourite. Um...there's no
more room for it.
356
00:26:11,615 --> 00:26:13,780
So I...I might as well use it...
357
00:26:14,660 --> 00:26:16,580
as a nightie.
358
00:26:28,700 --> 00:26:30,660
Kushi. Clint.
359
00:26:31,100 --> 00:26:32,665
Hey.
360
00:26:32,700 --> 00:26:34,580
No, no, no. I don't want the usual.
361
00:26:35,140 --> 00:26:37,060
I want the unusual.
362
00:26:38,780 --> 00:26:40,740
Well, I don't know.
363
00:26:41,340 --> 00:26:43,260
Yeah, just the usual.
364
00:26:47,460 --> 00:26:49,260
A happy frog.
365
00:26:49,295 --> 00:26:51,097
Be quiet.
366
00:26:51,132 --> 00:26:52,865
Sort of er...
367
00:26:56,780 --> 00:26:58,740
That's the noise I make when I fake.
368
00:26:59,420 --> 00:27:01,580
Blimey, you must fake it all the
time then.
369
00:27:02,140 --> 00:27:04,060
Well, I do. I mean, I did.
370
00:27:04,900 --> 00:27:07,500
Oh. All these years and I never
realised.
371
00:27:08,140 --> 00:27:10,620
Well, you're a man so...
Night after night,
372
00:27:10,655 --> 00:27:12,500
over and over with the frog noise,
373
00:27:13,180 --> 00:27:15,740
just to make me feel good about my
masculinity?
374
00:27:15,775 --> 00:27:17,660
I'm a good person.
375
00:27:20,380 --> 00:27:22,300
I need a shower before I...
376
00:27:24,540 --> 00:27:26,940
...before we...go to Clint's.
377
00:27:26,975 --> 00:27:28,820
Yes, you stink.
378
00:27:34,380 --> 00:27:36,300
This one's a bit crap.
379
00:27:37,060 --> 00:27:40,780
Well, you can use ours...
Mine.
380
00:27:43,020 --> 00:27:44,900
Thanks.
381
00:28:54,900 --> 00:28:58,620
Hi. Upstairs. Living room. Briefing
begins in 30 seconds. Go, go, go.
382
00:28:59,100 --> 00:29:00,980
Yep. Go.
383
00:29:02,300 --> 00:29:04,700
You said a hundred. Minus the front
grille.
384
00:29:04,735 --> 00:29:06,580
Ooh, you nit-picker. Come on.
385
00:29:18,700 --> 00:29:20,620
I love it when we
have our talks.
386
00:29:23,260 --> 00:29:26,060
What time does freak
junior hit the sheets?
387
00:29:28,580 --> 00:29:32,060
Get upstairs while you can
still walk without crutches.
388
00:29:34,460 --> 00:29:38,180
Just got to check one more site
then you can try and kiss Gina.
389
00:29:40,380 --> 00:29:44,700
Josephine, run along to bed. I have
things to discuss with Hazza.
390
00:29:46,060 --> 00:29:47,980
OK, Gina.
391
00:29:58,260 --> 00:30:00,180
I am eleven years, four months,
392
00:30:01,060 --> 00:30:02,980
seven days, three hours,
393
00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:06,260
twenty-three minutes
394
00:30:06,295 --> 00:30:08,220
and five seconds old.
395
00:30:08,900 --> 00:30:11,560
So, obviously, I know nothing about
romantic love.
396
00:30:11,595 --> 00:30:14,220
Except that it seems to have turned
my brother
397
00:30:14,255 --> 00:30:16,100
and Uncle Clint into complete
idiots.
398
00:30:17,540 --> 00:30:20,660
You are not to mention the number of
previous girlfriends.
399
00:30:22,020 --> 00:30:23,945
Check.
400
00:30:23,980 --> 00:30:27,700
You're not to mention the
sluttishness of said girlfriends.
401
00:30:29,660 --> 00:30:31,265
Check.
402
00:30:31,300 --> 00:30:34,820
You're not to make reference to my
previous character in any way,
403
00:30:34,855 --> 00:30:36,700
veiled or otherwise.
404
00:30:37,300 --> 00:30:39,025
Check.
405
00:30:39,060 --> 00:30:42,020
You are to emphasise the long-term
nature and stability
406
00:30:42,055 --> 00:30:44,945
and all-round Walt Disneyness of
your own relationships.
407
00:30:44,980 --> 00:30:48,340
Talk often about how much I admire
them and want to emulate them.
408
00:30:48,375 --> 00:30:50,465
All talk of potential divorce
409
00:30:50,500 --> 00:30:52,500
is to be put on hold for this one
evening.
410
00:30:53,940 --> 00:30:57,180
Babs. Is there any food at this
dinner party? There will be -
411
00:30:57,215 --> 00:30:59,980
after I have been fiendish and
Machiavellian.
412
00:31:02,100 --> 00:31:04,820
In summary: my character - lie,
413
00:31:05,460 --> 00:31:07,265
Ed and Lil - truth,
414
00:31:07,300 --> 00:31:09,340
Dickie and Babs - more lying.
415
00:31:09,375 --> 00:31:11,220
Are we clear?
416
00:31:12,540 --> 00:31:16,620
Come on, guys. Please. There's only
so many one-night stands one can stand.
417
00:31:16,655 --> 00:31:19,100
We'll see you right, C. Go. Cook.
418
00:31:20,860 --> 00:31:22,380
Right.
419
00:31:27,860 --> 00:31:29,740
She's here, she's he... Don't...
420
00:31:35,300 --> 00:31:37,540
Hi. Too early?
421
00:31:39,540 --> 00:31:41,460
- Shall I go round the block?
- No.
422
00:31:43,100 --> 00:31:45,020
Come... Come in.
423
00:31:47,940 --> 00:31:50,460
Hi. Hi. Can I take your...
424
00:31:50,495 --> 00:31:52,340
Yeah...er...scarf?
425
00:31:58,300 --> 00:32:00,220
The others are upstairs. OK.
426
00:32:06,580 --> 00:32:09,185
Hello. Hi. Hello. Hi there. Hi.
427
00:32:09,220 --> 00:32:11,460
I won't shake hands this time.
428
00:32:11,495 --> 00:32:13,260
- Am I late?
- No, don't be silly.
429
00:32:13,700 --> 00:32:15,740
Sit down.
430
00:32:17,460 --> 00:32:19,580
- Thank you.
- I'm Dickie. Nice to meet you.
431
00:32:20,780 --> 00:32:22,700
Come on.
432
00:32:23,580 --> 00:32:25,540
Come on.
433
00:32:56,220 --> 00:32:58,940
- Your feet stink.
- No, they don't.
434
00:32:59,180 --> 00:33:01,140
Definitely Gorgonzola of the toes.
435
00:33:03,820 --> 00:33:05,740
Do you think I'm beautiful?
436
00:33:06,540 --> 00:33:08,460
Maybe to a cheese-loving creature.
437
00:33:09,220 --> 00:33:11,140
Mice fancy your socks, I bet.
438
00:33:14,980 --> 00:33:17,900
- Sulking?
- Texting more mature men.
439
00:33:18,140 --> 00:33:20,140
Out of nose range might
be the way to go.
440
00:33:20,540 --> 00:33:22,460
Men with more than one joke, Harold.
441
00:33:23,380 --> 00:33:25,300
Oh, your breath's quite nasty too.
442
00:33:28,420 --> 00:33:30,305
That's a long time. Amazing.
443
00:33:30,340 --> 00:33:32,980
But Eddie didn't pay attention in
biology
444
00:33:33,015 --> 00:33:34,900
so we had Harry quite sharpish.
445
00:33:35,180 --> 00:33:37,580
And you're a doctor. Ambulanceman.
446
00:33:38,100 --> 00:33:40,200
Cool. You see? It's not cool.
447
00:33:40,235 --> 00:33:42,265
Not 'see'. She's being charming.
448
00:33:42,300 --> 00:33:45,820
Have you never been to a dinner
party? I've been to all of Clint's.
449
00:33:45,855 --> 00:33:47,700
So are you a model, Abbey?
450
00:33:48,540 --> 00:33:50,380
Not much of one.
451
00:33:51,340 --> 00:33:54,380
Plumbers' vans and wedding
catalogues are my level.
452
00:33:54,415 --> 00:33:56,597
I spend my life dressed up in giant
meringues.
453
00:33:56,632 --> 00:33:58,780
You wouldn't catch me dead in one of
those.
454
00:33:59,220 --> 00:34:02,220
Is it good money though?
It was when I was young.
455
00:34:02,255 --> 00:34:04,905
When you were young? What are you
now, 15? I'm 29.
456
00:34:04,940 --> 00:34:08,140
You look like you've just changed
out of your school uniform.
457
00:34:08,580 --> 00:34:10,300
Feel free to change back.
458
00:34:13,380 --> 00:34:15,545
Anyway, the work's starting to dry
up
459
00:34:15,580 --> 00:34:18,980
so time for me to look around for
something new to do with my life.
460
00:34:19,015 --> 00:34:22,380
Clint could offer you a job. He owns
a multinational ad agency.
461
00:34:24,260 --> 00:34:27,780
I don't own it though, do I, Babs?
I'm just a copywriter.
462
00:34:28,140 --> 00:34:31,780
Really? I'm sure I heard you say to
several people you owned it.
463
00:34:31,815 --> 00:34:34,345
Clint is the coolest man in the
world. He does.
464
00:34:34,380 --> 00:34:37,900
He writes telly ads where lawnmowers
chase each other at Brands Hatch
465
00:34:37,935 --> 00:34:39,917
and stuff like that. Don't you?
466
00:34:39,952 --> 00:34:41,900
How about that main course, eh?
467
00:34:42,780 --> 00:34:44,660
No, no, no, no. Stay. Stay here.
468
00:34:44,980 --> 00:34:46,860
Talk to Abbey.
469
00:34:47,980 --> 00:34:50,220
Who's got a new iPhone?
470
00:34:50,580 --> 00:34:54,020
Oh, yeah. I've got no idea how to
use it. It was a shoot freebie.
471
00:34:54,055 --> 00:34:57,180
Do you want me to sort you out some
cool apps, Abbs?
472
00:34:57,215 --> 00:34:59,380
I'm sure I would if I knew what apps
where.
473
00:34:59,415 --> 00:35:01,300
Applications. Look at this one.
474
00:35:02,300 --> 00:35:04,860
This one here is light a virtual
concert lighter.
475
00:35:20,460 --> 00:35:23,940
Why can't you do as you're asked?
This ruse would not fool a child.
476
00:35:23,975 --> 00:35:27,437
Shut up and peel lids. If you're
here you can't fight with Dick.
477
00:35:27,472 --> 00:35:30,865
Actually, he's been very... Ow!
...sweet. He's trying to change.
478
00:35:30,900 --> 00:35:34,780
You're mixing me up with someone sensitive
who doesn't want to nail an angel.
479
00:35:34,815 --> 00:35:38,100
Sorry. Schoolgirl error. Will not
happen again. Good. Come on.
480
00:35:39,620 --> 00:35:41,540
Make me tea, Prepube.
481
00:35:42,260 --> 00:35:44,540
- Make me tea, GothSlut.
- I'm busy.
482
00:35:55,740 --> 00:35:58,820
Want me to help you out
with your stiffy problem?
483
00:36:03,380 --> 00:36:05,380
Yes, please.
484
00:36:05,860 --> 00:36:07,705
What?
485
00:36:07,740 --> 00:36:11,940
'Yes, please' to your kind
offer about the stiffy.
486
00:36:13,340 --> 00:36:16,580
Shit, Harry, I'm sorry. That text
was meant for someone else.
487
00:36:17,180 --> 00:36:20,660
I realise that, dope. As if I'd
ever let you touch little Harry.
488
00:36:21,660 --> 00:36:25,180
- You're practically my sister.
- But you said yes, please.
489
00:36:26,180 --> 00:36:28,305
I was being ironic,
490
00:36:28,340 --> 00:36:31,380
letting you know you can't work
your address book properly.
491
00:36:33,900 --> 00:36:35,985
He would have got away with it
492
00:36:36,020 --> 00:36:38,500
had he not have written
the cheque in crayon.
493
00:36:38,535 --> 00:36:40,905
I needed that Tracy Island.
494
00:36:40,940 --> 00:36:44,460
The rocket came out from under the
swimming pool for goodness sake.
495
00:36:44,495 --> 00:36:46,997
Every boy in Britain
wanted a Tracy Island.
496
00:36:47,032 --> 00:36:49,465
Not every boy stole their
father's chequebook.
497
00:36:49,500 --> 00:36:52,940
I had every intention of paying
him back...when I got a job.
498
00:36:52,975 --> 00:36:55,697
You were eight. And he has been ever
since.
499
00:36:55,732 --> 00:36:58,385
You can talk. That was a
misunderstanding.
500
00:36:58,420 --> 00:37:02,020
You misunderstood that shoving Barbie
Make Me Beautiful up your jumper
501
00:37:02,055 --> 00:37:04,980
and heading for the door was not the
subtlest way to shoplift.
502
00:37:05,700 --> 00:37:09,300
Hold on. You and Barbie Make Me
Beautiful?
503
00:37:09,860 --> 00:37:12,100
Shut up or the wedding's off.
504
00:37:13,700 --> 00:37:15,980
Thought you'd already made that
decision.
505
00:37:16,340 --> 00:37:18,585
What?
506
00:37:18,620 --> 00:37:23,260
You've done everything possible to avoid the
arrangements, even hiding Clint's condoms.
507
00:37:23,295 --> 00:37:26,577
Condiments. Always hiding the salt
and pepper is Lil.
508
00:37:26,612 --> 00:37:29,860
She's a card. That's why we're such
good friends. Ssh.
509
00:37:29,895 --> 00:37:32,105
I have not been avoiding the
arrangements.
510
00:37:32,140 --> 00:37:36,020
Kind of gang it's great to be a part
of. Ed, she hasn't been avoiding it.
511
00:37:36,055 --> 00:37:38,225
You stay out of it. It's not your
fight.
512
00:37:38,260 --> 00:37:41,225
Fight? Nobody's fighting. Look, have
some sag aloo.
513
00:37:41,260 --> 00:37:45,540
You've been off for a week with nothing
to do but make wedding arrangements.
514
00:37:45,575 --> 00:37:48,025
Is that what I'm supposed to spend
my day doing,
515
00:37:48,060 --> 00:37:52,580
reading Mills & Boon and choosing between
freesias and carnations for table decorations?
516
00:37:53,460 --> 00:37:55,625
I didn't realise it was such a
burden.
517
00:37:55,660 --> 00:37:58,625
The okra's crying out to be
finished. It's my speciality.
518
00:37:58,660 --> 00:38:02,580
It's Crazy About Curry's speciality.
Oh. I thought it tasted familiar.
519
00:38:02,615 --> 00:38:05,705
Don't interrupt Eddie and Lil's
fight. We're not fighting.
520
00:38:05,740 --> 00:38:08,980
If you've changed your mind I'd
rather you just came out with it.
521
00:38:09,015 --> 00:38:11,220
I have not changed my mind.
522
00:38:11,500 --> 00:38:13,420
No, you never did really, did you?
523
00:38:14,540 --> 00:38:18,980
You just got a bit teared up by Joe
writing a sweet proposal speech, eh?
524
00:38:21,860 --> 00:38:24,640
Yeah, that's... You're right, it's
time for dessert.
525
00:38:24,675 --> 00:38:27,420
It's dessert. Kush does a mean
coconut ice cream.
526
00:38:27,455 --> 00:38:29,545
It comes in a shell and everything.
527
00:38:29,580 --> 00:38:32,260
It's supposed to be a secret,
Dickie. You started it.
528
00:38:33,540 --> 00:38:35,420
What are you doing down there, Dick?
529
00:38:35,940 --> 00:38:38,465
Hey? Oh, Texas Hold 'em.
530
00:38:38,500 --> 00:38:41,380
I never play online poker. It's
completely addictive.
531
00:38:46,455 --> 00:38:48,505
Ed, you're an idiot.
532
00:38:48,540 --> 00:38:50,420
Oh, God, Dickie. I'm really sorry.
533
00:38:58,700 --> 00:39:01,665
Don't you come near me.
I was showing her how to...
534
00:39:01,700 --> 00:39:05,460
Did you ask them to give us a bit of
alone time before dessert?
535
00:39:07,220 --> 00:39:09,180
Something like that.
536
00:39:10,740 --> 00:39:14,620
And those showery outbreaks are
going to stick around into the night.
537
00:39:15,100 --> 00:39:17,505
Further south tonight
a few mist patches,
538
00:39:17,540 --> 00:39:19,860
many of the showers inland
tending to die away
539
00:39:20,100 --> 00:39:23,465
with temperatures averaging
about eight or nine degrees.
540
00:39:23,500 --> 00:39:26,460
For the rest of the country there'll
be a dry start tomorrow...
541
00:39:41,340 --> 00:39:44,980
You have got this out of
proportion. Give me that key.
542
00:39:49,420 --> 00:39:52,420
It's great to see you again, Abbey.
You are a lovely girl -
543
00:39:52,455 --> 00:39:54,737
if more attractive than is strictly
necessary.
544
00:39:54,772 --> 00:39:57,020
Don't get married and don't have
children.
545
00:39:59,180 --> 00:40:01,060
Bye, Abbs. Cool phone.
546
00:40:08,220 --> 00:40:11,740
It's nice to see you again, Abbey.
I'm sorry about the shouting.
547
00:40:11,775 --> 00:40:13,580
I'd invite you to the wedding but
um...
548
00:40:18,340 --> 00:40:22,380
Nice to see you again. Sorry to dash.
I have urgent idiots to deal with.
549
00:40:22,415 --> 00:40:25,020
And Clint, you know, not all bad.
Mostly but not all.
550
00:40:26,300 --> 00:40:28,340
Thanks.
Thanks for that.
551
00:41:07,460 --> 00:41:09,380
Oi. Oi.
552
00:41:10,580 --> 00:41:12,500
Here. In the gutter.
553
00:41:13,300 --> 00:41:16,385
With...with cat litter for confetti
554
00:41:16,420 --> 00:41:18,580
and police sirens for the Wedding
March.
555
00:41:18,615 --> 00:41:20,460
Or in St Paul's Cathedral,
556
00:41:20,980 --> 00:41:23,460
me sewn into an enormous silk
meringue,
557
00:41:23,495 --> 00:41:25,585
if that's what you want.
558
00:41:25,620 --> 00:41:28,100
Do you not get it, you big, ugly
fool?
559
00:41:28,940 --> 00:41:32,460
I didn't...I have not...I haven't
looked at the magazines
560
00:41:32,495 --> 00:41:34,625
because of...
561
00:41:34,660 --> 00:41:36,380
because I...
Because?
562
00:41:36,900 --> 00:41:40,100
Because I don't need anyone else's
fairytale.
563
00:41:40,420 --> 00:41:42,545
I have my own.
564
00:41:42,580 --> 00:41:46,140
And the fairytale doesn't need
pageboy costumes
565
00:41:46,175 --> 00:41:48,820
or sodding ice sculpture unicorns.
566
00:41:49,540 --> 00:41:53,220
I've built my heaven right next to
you for all of these years
567
00:41:53,700 --> 00:41:56,020
and...and so long as we both turn up,
568
00:41:56,700 --> 00:42:00,060
I think we will we have the most
beautiful, the most poetic,
569
00:42:00,095 --> 00:42:02,540
the most perfect wedding anybody will
ever have.
570
00:42:06,940 --> 00:42:09,105
Except...
571
00:42:09,140 --> 00:42:12,660
maybe my Ken marrying my Barbie for
the very first time
572
00:42:12,695 --> 00:42:14,540
which was also extremely moving.
573
00:42:17,220 --> 00:42:19,700
Why do I always have to drag that
stuff out of you?
574
00:42:20,460 --> 00:42:22,380
I don't know.
575
00:42:24,020 --> 00:42:28,300
Sometimes...sometimes I think I've
said stuff when...
576
00:42:29,460 --> 00:42:31,380
...when...when I haven't.
577
00:42:32,020 --> 00:42:34,140
Can you get to
the kissing bit?
578
00:42:34,175 --> 00:42:36,020
Some of us are trying to sleep.
579
00:42:40,020 --> 00:42:41,620
Sorry.
580
00:43:09,140 --> 00:43:10,940
Don't.
581
00:43:10,975 --> 00:43:12,740
Don't.
582
00:43:13,180 --> 00:43:15,100
I'll do that later.
583
00:43:16,100 --> 00:43:17,980
Can I...
584
00:43:19,100 --> 00:43:21,000
...call you a cab?
585
00:43:21,035 --> 00:43:22,900
I...I ordered my own.
586
00:43:29,740 --> 00:43:32,140
Do you know what I liked about this
evening,
587
00:43:32,175 --> 00:43:34,020
disaster on legs that it was?
588
00:43:35,180 --> 00:43:37,345
Authentic, home-cooked Indian food
589
00:43:37,380 --> 00:43:39,300
inspired by the peasant cuisine of
Goa?
590
00:43:39,980 --> 00:43:41,660
No.
591
00:43:43,140 --> 00:43:45,340
I like that you cared
when it all went wrong.
592
00:43:47,100 --> 00:43:50,500
I like that you're
secretly...that guy.
593
00:43:58,140 --> 00:44:00,060
I'll take that.
594
00:44:02,700 --> 00:44:04,340
Thanks.
595
00:44:29,820 --> 00:44:31,905
Sorry, Abbey.
596
00:44:31,940 --> 00:44:33,780
I had a bit of a clear out earlier.
597
00:44:35,300 --> 00:44:38,940
That one has little Clint
etched on it in gold letters.
598
00:44:40,900 --> 00:44:42,460
Old Clint.
599
00:44:47,140 --> 00:44:49,060
We'll see.
600
00:45:03,940 --> 00:45:07,380
Most blokes'd chop their knobs off
to be with Abbey. Why come here?
601
00:45:07,415 --> 00:45:09,740
Might as well chop it off.
I'm getting no action.
602
00:45:09,775 --> 00:45:11,820
I can't help feeling
that he has heart too.
603
00:45:12,340 --> 00:45:16,380
Do you know what day it is today?
Friday. It's my wedding anniversary.
604
00:45:16,415 --> 00:45:19,540
I haven't got you anything.
I didn't think we'd be celebrating.
605
00:45:19,575 --> 00:45:21,460
Good luck today.
You're gonna need it.
606
00:45:25,800 --> 00:45:30,800
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607
00:45:30,850 --> 00:45:35,400
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