Original subtitles

IF YOU DON'T LIKE YZMA, THEN DON'T WATCH TODAY'S SHOW.

OF COURSE, WHO DOES LIKE YZMA?

OK, IF YOU DON'T LIKE YZMA, THEN DO WATCH TODAY'S SHOW.

OH, WELL. JUST WATCH. THEME MUSIC!

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO THE THRONE ♪

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO SUCCESS ♪

♪ BUT HE HAS TO GO TO SCHOOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO ACE THAT TEST ♪

♪ HE'S AN EMPEROR-TO-BE ♪

♪ AND HE'S TOTALLY ♪

YOU KNOW, IT'S ALL ABOUT ME. ♪ AHH ♪

EXACTLY!

LET'S GO!

♪ HE'S GOING TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO LEARN ♪

♪ HIS ABCs ♪

♪ DON'T TRY TO STOP HIM ♪

♪ TO TOP HIM ♪ TO DESTROY HIM,

RIGHT? UHH...

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO! GO, GO!

♪ HE'S GOT THE COOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE CHARM AND THE LOOKS ♪

♪ AND A HOTTIE THAT CAN HELP HIM ♪

♪ READ THAT THING CALLED BOOK ♪

♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOING TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ COME ON, KUZCO ♪

♪ GOT TO FULFILL HIS DESTINY ♪

♪ HIS FRIENDS ARE LOYAL, IT'S ROYAL ♪

♪ THEY'LL HELP AGAINST THE FOIL ♪

FRIENDS? I THOUGHT THIS WAS ALL ABOUT ME.

HEH HEH! SPELL MY NAME AGAIN!

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO! GO, GO!

Kuzco: LOOK AT THAT, WHEE!

HODGES VILLAGE, BIG WHOOP. I'VE SEEN THAT LOTS OF TIMES.

AND THERE'S THE SCHOOL, KUZCO ACADEMY, NAMED AFTER ME.

LESS TIME SPENT THERE THE BETTER.

HEY, THERE'S A PLACE WE DON'T USUALLY SEE,

THE TEMPLE OF THE SKY GOD.

THEY SAY IF YOU'VE GOTTA HAVE A TEMPLE,

SKY GOD'S A PRETTY GOOD HEAD HONCHO KINDA GUY TO HAVE A TEMPLE TO.

THIS IS WHERE NORMAL PEOPLE COME TO MAKE THEIR

THEIR NORMAL PEOPLE, ORDINARY, EVERY DAY WISHES LIKE,

"I WISH I HAD A STRONGER LAMA,"

OR, "I WISH MY HUSBAND DIDN'T SMELL LIKE A LAMA".

OR, "I WISH EVERYONE WOULD LAY OFF PICKING ON THE LAMA."

BUT HEY, IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT LAMAS".

SOME PEOPLE MIGHT WISH TO BE TALLER,

SOME PEOPLE MIGHT WISH FOR A SUNNY DAY ON A SANDY BEACH,

SOME PEOPLE MIGHT WISH TO BE SMARTER.

OBVIOUSLY, IT DOESN'T ALWAYS WORK,

BUT PEOPLE KEEP BLABBITY, BLAB, BLAB, BLABBING

THEIR TROUBLES TO SKY GOD, MAKING THEIR WISHES.

EVEN IF IT DOESN'T COME TRUE, THEY FEEL BETTER AFTERWARDS.

WEIRD HUH?

AND THAT'S WHY YOU SEE ME HERE, TOO.

LOOK AT ME, MAKING A WISHY WISH!

I WISH I'D NEVER BEEN EMPEROR!

YEAH, I BET THAT SEEMS ALL BACKWARDS, UPSIDE DOWNY, HUH?

I MEAN, USUALLY EVERYTHING I AM, SAY, OR DO,

IS ALL ABOUT BEING THE BIG "E",

SO HOW DID I END UP ALL, "I DON'T WANNA BE EMPEROR!"

WELL, IT ALL STARTED EARLIER, IN MY BRAND NEW BEDROOM!

KUZCO!

RIGHT, WHO KNEW THERE WAS THIS WHOLE OTHER ROOM IN THE HUT?

IT'S A LOT ROOMIER THAN THE ATTIC.

SORRY BUT, AS EMPEROR, I GOTTA HAVE THE BIGGEST ROOM,

ELBOW ROOM FOR THE ROYAL ELBOWS, DON'T YOU KNOW?

BUT THIS IS PACHA'S AND MY BEDROOM.

WAIT, WAS THAT WHAT ALL THAT STUFF WAS... THAT WAS IN HERE?

I MOVED IT TO THE ATTIC.

WELL, CHACA AND TIPO HELPED,

WELL, THEY MOVED IT, I SUPERVISED...

...IN SPIRIT, I WENT SWIMMING.

KUZCO!

CHICHA'S NOT ANGRY, IS SHE?

[MARKER SQUEAKS] SMILE, CHICHA.

YOU KNOW, NOT EVERYONE IS SO UNDERSTANDING

WHEN IT COMES TO HAVING AN EMPEROR IN THEIR LIFE.

CHECK THIS OUT,

YO, KUZCO. YOU'RE LOOKING A LITTLE THIRSTY.

HOW ABOUT A LEMON LIME SODA? YOUR FAVORITE.

WAIT! OH, NO YOU DON'T!

THAT'S AN YZMA POTION ISN'T IT? WHAT'S THIS ONE DO?

TURN ME INTO A MARMOT CAUSE A MARMOT CAN'T PASS A HISTORY TEST?

AND THEN I'LL BE BANISHED TO MARMOT-LAND, WHERE MARMOTS DO

MARMOTTY MARMOT THINGS TO EACH OTHER ALL THE LIVE LONG MARMOT DAY?

WELL, TOUGH LUCK, 'CAUSE THIS IS ONE NON-MARMOT WHO'S STUDIED.

AW, COME ON, LIKE THIS IS THE BEST USE OF MY TIME, EITHER.

I GOTTA LIFE TOO, I GOT RECIPES I COULD BE PERFECTING.

PRECIOUS, PRECIOUS RECIPES.

BUT NO, I GOTTA MAKE KUZCO DRINK POTIONS!

A MARMOT POTION, A LEMUR POTION, A BUTTERFLY POTION.

IT NEVER ENDS! WHY CAN'T YZMA JUST COME UP WITH ONE BIG,

SUPER-DUPER, ULTIMATE PLAN,

AND GET RID OF YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL!

I MEAN, U--

IT'S LEMON LIME, YOUR FAVORITE.

GO ON, HAVE A LITTLE SIP.

NO THANK YOU, POTION MONKEY, BUH-BYE.

POOR, KRONK!

I HAD NO IDEA I WAS SUCH AN INCONVENIENCE,

MEATHEAD.

OH, NOT KRONK. ME, I'M THE MEATHEAD.

FIRST CHICHA, THEN KRONK, NOW CHECK OUT THIS NEXT BIT,

THIS IS WHERE YOU'LL SEE ME KICK INTO MEATHEAD OVERDRIVE.

NOPE, NOT IT, NOT IT,

NOT IT, NOT IT,

NOPE, NOPE, NOPE, NOT--

KUZCO, STOP THAT!

MR. MOLEGUACO KEEPS THE ANSWERS IN HERE SOMEWHERE,

YOU KNOW THE DRILL, I DON'T PASS THIS TEST,

I DON'T GET TO BE EMPEROR,

BUT-- BUT-- BUT, MH!

DIDN'T YOU USE THE FLASH CARDS I MADE FOR YOU?

DIDN'T YOU READ THE STUDY NOTES I WROTE?

DIDN'T YOU EVEN TRY TO STUDY?

UHHHHHHHHHHH....

NO.

AHA!

GIMME THAT! I AM SHOCKED!

Mr. M: FRANKLY MALENA, SO AM I!

STEALING TEST ANSWERS IS A MAJOR ACADEMIC VIOLATION.

GRRRRRRRRR!

YOUCH. SEE THAT HORRIBLE FACE? ME NO LIKEY THAT FACE.

THAT FACE IS WHAT MADE IT FINALLY SINK IN THAT

EVEN THOUGH I TRY AND TRY, I JUST DON'T GET IT.

I JUST DON'T FIT IN WITH NORMAL PEOPLE.

PACHA, CHICHA, KRONK, MALENA--

I'M AN EMPEROR AND NO ONE ELSE IS.

YEAH, I KNOW, USUALLY THAT'S A GOOD THING.

BUT NOT WHEN I LOOK AT THAT FACE.

Kuzco:SO THAT'S WHEN I DECIDED TO GO UP TO THE TEMPLE OF THE SKY GOD,

I MEAN IF I WANNA FIT IN, I GOTTA TRY EVERYTHING, RIGHT?

YOU LOOK LIKE SOMEONE WHO'S ABOUT TO WISH TO FIT IN,

WOW, HOW'D YOU KNOW?

I'VE SEEN LOTS OF EMPERORS COME UP HERE,

ALL OF THEM WISH TO FIT IN WITH THEIR SUBJECTS.

[WHEEZING LAUGH]

NEVER WORKS OUT, THOUGH.

WHY NOT?

YOU'VE NEVER WISHED TO THE SKY GOD BEFORE, HAVE YOU?

IT'S NEVER STRAIGHT FORWARD,

YOU GO IN THERE AND WISH TO FIT IT AND, POOF!

YOU'RE A TREE THAT FITS INTO A FOREST 10 THOUSAND MILES AWAY.

FORESTS ARE SCARY.

OK, WHAT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND?

YOU SHOULD WISH-- [INDISTINCT WHISPERING]

I WISH I'D NEVER BEEN EMPEROR!

SEE? THIS IS WHERE YOU CAME IN.

DOESN'T SEEM SO BACKWARDS UPSIDE DOWNY,

WHEN YOU SEE HOW I GOT HERE, RIGHT?

HEY, QUIT WITH MY YAMMERING ALREADY,

WE'VE GOT SOME EXPENSIVE MAGICAL EFFECTS TO CHECK OUT.

THAT COSTS EXTRA?

'CAUSE WE HAVE NEVER HAD STUFF LIKE THAT ON THIS SHOW BEFORE.

[CHUCKLES]

HEY! WHERE DID MR. CREEPY McCREEPERHAM GO?

HUH. WHAT'S THAT NOISE? [TAPPING]

[TAPPING] DUDE. WHAT'S GOING ON OUT THERE?

HEY, IT'S A LITTLE ME IN A SNOW GLOBE.

HELLO, KNICK-KNACK ME.

HEY, GIANT ME.

YOU LOOK DIFFERENT, LIKE YOU'RE...

NOT AN EMPEROR, OR SOMETHING.

I'M NOT!

I'M GONNA CHECK OUT WHAT IT'S LIKE TO ACTUALLY

FIT IN WITH ORDINARY PEOPLE.

OK, HAVE FUN WITH THAT.

I'LL BE IN HERE, BEING AN EMPEROR.

IF YOU EVER WANNA CHANGE BACK, YOU KNOW, JUST...

CRACK OPEN THE ORB.

♪ HEY LOOK AT ME, I'M GONNA FIT IN, FIT IN, FIT IN ♪

♪ HEY LOOK AT ME, I'M GONNA FIT IN, FIT IN, FIT IN... ♪

♪ ...EVERYWHERE! ♪

WHAT THE HEY?

Yzma: ♪ WELCOME TO MY CITY ♪

♪ WELCOME TO MY LAND ♪

♪ WELCOME TO THE EMPIRE ♪

♪ THAT ONLY I COMMAND ♪

♪ YZMA-POLIS, MY METROPOLIS ♪

♪ MY FAVORITE PLACE TO BE ♪

♪ YZMA-POLIS, MY METROPOLIS ♪

♪ WHERE IT'S ALL FOR ONE AND THAT ONE IS ME ♪

♪ FROM YZMA BOULEVARD, TO YZMA AVENUE ♪

♪ ALL LANDMARKS AND ROADS AND PARKS ARE NAMED FOR ME, NOT YOU ♪

YOU KNOW UNTIL I CAME ALONG, THIS WAS JUST A ONE LAMA TOWN,

BUT NOW IT'S...

♪ YZMA-POLIS, MY METROPOLIS THE R-R-REGION THAT I RULE ♪

♪ YZMA-POLIS, MY METROPOLIS, NOW WELCOME TO MY SCHOOL! ♪

♪ Y-Z-M-A YZMA, YZMA, HOO RAY! ♪

♪ YZMA-POLIS, MY METROPOLIS, A WONDROUS PLACE TO BE ♪

IT'S GLORIOUS. VICTORIOUS,

WE ALWAYS LAUGH UPROARIOUS.

'CAUSE LIFE IS SO EUPHORIOUS!

AND HERE IS WHAT YOU'LL SEE.

♪ YZMA MOVIES, STARING ME ♪

♪ MY NAME IN LIGHTS ON THE YZMARQUEE ♪

♪ YZMA BOOKS AND MAGAZINES, YZMA SHIRTS, YZMA JEANS ♪

♪ YZMA CHOCOLATE, YZMA MINTS, YZMA SHAMPOO AND THE RINSE ♪

♪ ALL THE DOGS ARE YZMALTESE AND LIFE IS JUST AN YZMA-BREEZE ♪

♪ HEAR ME CHAT ON THE RADIO AT... ♪

♪ Y-Z-M-A FM ♪

Reporter: ♪ YZMAPOLIS MY METROPOLIS ♪

♪ WITH NEWS AND SPORTS, WHATEVER ♪

♪ YZMA TRAFFIC'S ALL BACKED UP AND NOW A LOOK AT WEATHER ♪

I CAN'T WAIT TO SHOW YOU MY NEW PROJECT. YZMATOPIA!

THERE'S A PEASANT VILLAGE ON THE SPOT RIGHT NOW,

BUT YOU CAN'T STOP PROGRESS,

YZMAPOLIS IS GROWING, AND SOON, SOON, SOON IT WILL BECOME...

♪ YZMAPOLIS MY METROPOLIS ♪

Yzma: ♪ MY PURPLE LEGACY ♪

♪ YZMAPOLIS ♪

♪ THERE'S NO STOPOLIS! ♪

THAT'S NOT A WORD!

♪ IT IS TO ME ♪

♪ SOME HAVE TRIED TO RUN AND HIDE ♪

♪ BUT THEY JUST CAN'T GET FREE ♪

♪ 'CAUSE WHEN I'M DEAD ♪

♪ YOU'LL BOW YOUR HEAD ♪

♪ TO AN YZMUMMY OF ME! ♪

[YZMA LAUGHING LOUDLY]

♪ WELCOME TO HER CITY, WELCOME TO HER LAND ♪

♪ WELCOME TO THE EMPIRE THAT ONLY I COMMAND ♪

YZMAPOLIS.

PACHA, CHICHA!

HOW DO YOU KNOW OUR NAMES?

NO TIME TO BE POLITE, WE'RE DUE AT THE PALACE, COME ON.

WE'VE BEEN SUMMONED.

WAIT. WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,

IT'S ME, KUZCO. DON'T YOU RECOGNIZE ME?

YEAH, YOU'RE THE GUY WHO JUST STOPPED US TWO SECONDS AGO.

LOOK, I REALLY DON'T WANNA BE RUDE, BUT GET OUTTA THE WAY, WILL YA?

THAT'S A FINE WAY TO TREAT YOUR EMPEROR!

OH, WAIT. RIGHT, STUPID WISH.

BUT THEY SHOULD AT LEAST STILL RECOGNIZE ME, RIGHT?

WAIT A MINUTE,

THE SKY GOD DIDN'T JUST MAKE ME "NEVER BEEN EMPEROR,"

I'VE NEVER BEEN, PERIOD!

VERY FUNNY! YOU'RE A HOOT, YOU ARE.

YOU KNOW, THERE ARE HUMORLESS CHILDREN ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD,

JUST STARVING FOR SOME HILARIOUS COMIC TALENT LIKE YOURS.

ONE MORE TIME, EMPRESS YZMA,

UH, SO YOU'RE SAYING OUR HUT IS IN THE PERFECT SPOT...

...FOR YOUR POOL?

WELCOME TO YZMATOPIA, MY ULTIMATE SUMMER GET AWAY.

COMPLETE WITH LOOP-DA-LOOP WATER SLIDE, HA HA HA.

WHAT?

IT'S A LITTLE "GLAD I'M ME" GIFT, TO ME.

BUT OUR FAMILY HAS LIVED ON THAT HILLTOP FOR THE LAST SIX GENERATIONS.

ARGGGGGGH!

WOW, THAT'S COLD.

I MEAN, I KNOW I ALMOST DID THAT EXACT SAME THING WITH KUZCO-TOPIA,

BUT I DIDN'T GO THROUGH WITH IT, GIVE ME SOME CREDIT,

NO? OK, WELL, AT LEAST I'M LESSER OF TWO EVILS, RIGHT?

UH, I VOTE YES TO WHATEVER GETS YOU TO HELP US DOWN.

UH, OFF CAMPUS DURING SCHOOL HOURS, EH?

COME WITH US!

HEY! NO TOUCHY.

I DON'T KNOW WHO THIS PRINCIPAL AMZY IS YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

I'M THE PRINCIPAL OF YZMA ACADEMY, PRINCIPAL KRONK.

BECAUSE KRONK IS MY NAME, AND I'M THE PRINCIPAL.

RIGHT,

I GUESS THAT MAKES SENSE, SORTA.

WITHOUT ME IN SCHOOL, YZMA DOESN'T HAVE TO BE AMZY ALL THE TIME.

EH, I BET THAT GIVES YOU LOTS OF FREE TIME

TO PURSUE THAT RECIPE HOBBY OF YOURS, RIGHT?

WHAT ARE YOU BLABBERING ABOUT FREE TIME? HOBBY?

BEING PRINCIPAL IS A 24-7 COMMITMENT,

WOW, THIS KRONK'S EVEN WORSE OFF THAN THE ONE BACK HOME,

AT LEAST MY KRONK HAD SOME TIME TO HIMSELF.

YOU KNOW, WHEN HE'S NOT TRYING TO TURN ME INTO A GNU OR A MONKEY.

THIS GUY'S ABOUT TO BLOW A GASKET.

WHOA, STOP! IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT--?

NO. NO! CHECK, PLEASE. I'M OUTTA HERE!

LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA--

NOT EVEN LISTENING, ARE YOU? YOU'RE A TROUBLEMAKER!

THIS IS HOW WE DEAL WITH TROUBLE-MAKERS AT YZMA ACADEMY!

HUH?

UHG, UHG, UHG!

Malena: EXCUSE ME, UH-- DO YOU NEED HELP?

MALENA?

BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING, LET ME JUST ASK,

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN ME? DO I LOOK AT ALL FAMILIAR?

LIKE I USED TO BE EMPEROR, GO TO LUNCH WITH YOU EVERYDAY,

GOT YOU BUSTED FOR STEALING TEST ANSWERS, RING A BELL?

NO, NO, NO, NO, AND NO.

WOW, SHE SAYS NO, JUST LIKE NORMAL MALENA.

THANKS.

SO, UH--

WHY AREN'T YOU IN SCHOOL?

I'M NOT ALLOWED TO GO TO SCHOOL.

[SOBBING] I'M TOO PRETTY AND... I'M TOO SMART!

BY ORDER OF EMPRESS YZMA,

I WALK THE STREETS IN SHAME FOR MY GREAT BEAUTY AND BRAINS.

NAW, COME ON. YOU'RE... MALENA!

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE PROUD OF BEING PRETTY AND SMART.

[SOBS] YOU KNOW,

I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU, BUT I THINK YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT.

PRETTY AND SMART IS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!

FREEZE! YOUR NEW FOUND PRIDE IS IN VIOLATION OF YZMA LAW.

TO THE DUNGEON!

NOOOO-AHHHH!

MALENA, NO!

Kuzco:AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR KUZCO'S DOODLES,

THAT'S WHERE YOU GET TO SEE ME TOTALLY WAIL

ON SOME GIANT GUARDS AND RESCUE MALENA!

LOOK, THERE'S THEM.

[GIRLY VOICE] "OH, LOOK AT ME, I'M A LITTLE GIRLY GUARD!

QUICK! SEIZE, KUZCO! DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY!"

AND I'M ALL, "GIVE ME KUZCOPOWER CHOP--"

HYE-YAH! HYE-YOO! HYE-YOO!

THEN I RESCUED MALENA.

AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.

WOW, WHAT A COWARD.

I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYONE RUN AWAY SO FAST.

HEY, I THINK HE WENT THERE--

OK, I DIDN'T RESCUE MALENA.

SO, SUE ME. YOU COME TRY TO DO IT. THOSE GUARDS ARE BI-IG.

I'M GONNA GO HOME. I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YZMAPOLIS.

[PANTING]

WHY'S IT GOTTA BE THE SKY GOD?

WHY CAN'T IT JUST BE...

THE "DOWN THE STREET BY THE LAMA SHOP" GOD?

YO, MR. SKY! TIME TO CRACK OPEN THE ORB AND...

[GASPS] OH, NO!

IT'S GONE, GONE, GONE, GONE!

Old Man: LOOKING FOR...THIS?

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. HAND IT OVER. COME ON.

I'D LIKE MY REGULAR OLD EMPEROR LIFE BACK NOW.

YES, PLEASE.

Old Man: HA HA! BUT IT'S NOT YOUR LIFE ANYMORE,

IT'S MINE,

FOR, YOU SEE,

I'M YZMA! [CACKLING LAUGHTER]

Yzma: SO, KUZCO,

HOW HAVE YOU ENJOYED YOUR VISIT TO YZMAPOLIS, MY METROPOLIS--

WHOA, WHOA, YOU ALREADY DID THE, UH,

SINGING THINGY, AND AS FOR YZMAPOLIS,

I'VE LEARNED, IF I WERE A LITTLE LESS SELFISH,

I MIGHT NOT BE SUCH A BAD EMPEROR.

THAT AND, I GUESS I'M NOT SO WILD ABOUT PURPLE,

BUT I GET THAT THAT'S YOUR THING, SO... NO BIGGIE.

WHAT I DON'T GET IS,

HOW COME NO ONE KNOWS WHO I AM BUT YOU?

AH, THAT'S EASY,

FOR TEMPORARY PROTECTION FROM MINOR SKY GOD WISH MAGIC.

HUH. OK, THEN. QUESTION TWO,

WHY NOT JUST WISH TO BE EMPRESS YOURSELF?

YES! THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I SAID, TOO.

AS IT TURNS OUT, THERE'S ONLY ONE WISH PER PERSON,

WELL, WE DIDN'T KNOW THAT YET, WHEN I WISHED FOR

A COOL HAT,

AND THEN I WISHED IT AWAY, BUT NOW,

I'VE TRICKED YOU INTO USING YOUR ONE WISH TO MAKE MY DREAM COME TRUE!

WAIT, RUN THROUGH THAT AGAIN?

I TRICKED YOU INTO USING YOUR WISH

TO MAKE MY DREAM COME TRUE!

OK, NOW I FOLLOW YOU.

YEAH, YOU JUST WENT THROUGH THAT A LITTLE QUICK,

HEY, DON'T FEEL BAD, STRANGER,

I HAD TO ASK FOR A REPEAT TOO.

FINE, I'LL TALK NICE AND SLOW FOR THIS NEXT PART,

Yzma:NOW THAT YOU'VE NEVER BEEN AN EMPEROR,

YOU HAVE TO MAKE DO IN THE REAL WORLD, AS A NORMAL PERSON IN A NORMAL HOUSE,

YOU'LL GO TO SCHOOL AS NORMAL KID,

THEN STRUGGLE TO GET NORMAL GRADES LIKE ALL YOUR NORMAL CLASSMATES,

SOMEDAY YOU'LL GRADUATE, THEN YOU'LL GET A NORMAL JOB,

Speaker: ORDERING ONE BURGER, HOLD THE ONIONS, FRIES, AND A YZMALT.

Yzma:AND WILL BE SO NORMAL, YOU'LL SNAP.

AND YOU'LL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO RUN OUT AND DO SOMETHING SPECTACULARLY HEROIC,

AND BECOME AN EMPEROR ONCE AGAIN!

IT'S BRILLIANT, BRILLIANT, BRILLIANT!

SO, YOUR ULTIMATE, GIANT, END-ALL PLAN

MAKES ME EMPEROR AGAIN.

REALLY?

NO, THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT, CAN IT?

"NEVER BEEN EMPEROR, NORMAL KID, HOUSE, SCHOOL, NORMAL, NORMAL,

"GRADUATION, JOB, NORMAL, NORMAL,

BECOME EMPEROR ONCE AGAIN" WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?

BEATS ME, LADY, IT'S YOUR HANDWRITING,

FINE!

NEVER MIND, I'LL JUST HAVE TO USE THIS!

WAHH! I'M A BUG-FACE!

NOW, KRONK, NOW! GET THE HAMMER!

Bug-Face: STOP! STOP! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?

[DRIPPING]

UH, A TALKING BUG?

KRONK, I'M KUZCO!

KUZCO, THE TALKING BUG.

DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND, YOU CHEESE-HEAD?

KUZCO, THE INSULTING, TALKING BUG.

[WHOOSH]

MHH!

[PANTING]

I'VE GOTTA GET MY LIFE BACK!

BUT WHERE DOES SHE KEEP IT?

[SNORING]

DON'T LET KUZCO GET AWAY.

[SNORING]

NO, YOU DUMB OX, HE'S OVER THERE.

[SNORING] GET ME ANOTHER--

[TAPPING] HM?

HEY, BRO, GOOD TO SEE YOU. LOOKING GOOD!

MAKING PLANS WITH THE LADY BUGS I BET, RRRROWR.

SHH! [SNORING]

DON'T LOOK AT ME, I WASN'T DRIVING.

MMMH!

UH-OH.

WHAT IS THAT, ANYWAY?

IT FLINGS THINGS, HA!

[SNORING] NO, SO I DIDN'T HEAR A THING.

HEY ME, AM I OK IN THERE?

HUH!

NO KRONK, DON'T!

MALENA, THANKS. BUT, HOW'D--

...I FIND YOU?

YEAH, AND HOW'D--? ...I KNOW

YOU'D BEEN TURNED INTO A BUG?

SIMPLE, I'M REALLY SMART.

AND IT'S WEIRD, BUT SOMEHOW I FEEL LIKE

I KNOW YOU FROM SOMEWHERE.

I HAD TO MAKE SURE YOU WERE OK.

KRONK!

OOPSEY.

HUH? WHAT'S GOING ON?

WHY AM I HOLDING YOU?

'CAUSE I'M CUDDLY, RRROWR!

YO, KUZCO MAN!

YOU'RE LOOKIN' MIGHTY THIRSTY.

HA, NOT GONNA GET ME WITH THAT ONE.

CAN'T BLAME A GUY FOR TRYING.

SHH, LOOK HONEY,

IT'S THE RARELY SEEN, LAZY HOUSE GUEST.

DON'T SCARE IT AWAY.

I'VE NEVER SEEN ONE IN THE WILD BEFORE.

Kuzco:YAY! EVERYTHING'S BACK TO NORMAL!

MALENA CAN BARELY TOLERATE ME, KRONK'S TRYING TO POTION ME,

AND AND PACHA AND CHICHA ARE BUSTIN' MY CHOPS.

YOU KNOW, I DIDN'T KNOW I HAD IT IN ME AND FROM NOW ON FORWARD,

I'M GONNA MAKE IT ALL A LITTLE LESS ABOUT ME AND BE A MUCH BETTER EMPEROR.

Kuzco:AND IT'S ALL THANKS TO YZMA!

Yzma: OHHH, KUZCO!

WAHHHH!

OH!

HEY!

[BLOWING]

AW.

[POP]

WAHHHH!

OOH.

[BLOWING]

MH--?

[POP]

WAHHHH!

[POP]

WAHHHH!

OH.

AH!

[BLOWING]

AR, AR, AR, AR.

PLPLPLPLPLR!

[LOUD POP]

OH.

WAHHHH!

WAHHHH! [BLOWING]

[POP]

WAHHHHH! ARGGGG!

[GRUNTS] WAHHHHH!

AWWWAW, AW! OH, MY GOD.

OH.

HUH-HA!

[DING DING]

[BLOWING]

MMM?

HMMM. HEE HEE.

HA!

[POP]

HMMM?