Original subtitles

HOLA, TV FRIENDS.

THAT'S RIGHT. EVERYBODY OUT THERE IS MY VERY GOOD TV FRIEND.

AREN'T YOU ALL LUCKY? YOU'RE ALL MY FRIENDS.

OKEYDOKEY. THEME MUSIC.

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO THE THRONE ♪

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO SUCCESS ♪

♪ BUT HE HAS TO GO TO SCHOOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO ACE THAT TEST ♪

♪ HE'S AN EMPEROR-TO-BE ♪

♪ AND HE'S TOTALLY ♪

YOU KNOW, IT'S ALL ABOUT ME. ♪ AHH ♪

EXACTLY!

LET'S GO!

♪ HE'S GOING TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO LEARN ♪

♪ HIS ABCs ♪

♪ DON'T TRY TO STOP HIM ♪

♪ TO TOP HIM ♪ TO DESTROY HIM,

RIGHT? UHH...

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO! GO, GO!

♪ HE'S GOT THE COOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE CHARM AND THE LOOKS ♪

♪ AND A HOTTIE THAT CAN HELP HIM ♪

♪ READ THAT THING CALLED BOOK ♪

♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOING TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ COME ON, KUZCO ♪

♪ GOT TO FULFILL HIS DESTINY ♪

♪ HIS FRIENDS ARE LOYAL, IT'S ROYAL ♪

♪ THEY'LL HELP AGAINST THE FOIL ♪

FRIENDS? I THOUGHT THIS WAS ALL ABOUT ME.

HEH HEH! SPELL MY NAME AGAIN!

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO! GO, GO!

WOULD YOU LOOK AT ME?

ANOTHER FINE MESS I'VE GOTTEN MYSELF INTO.

YOU EVER HEARD THE PHRASE,

"YOU CAN LEAD A LLAMA TO WATER, BUT YOU CAN'T MAKE IT DRINK"?

WELL, FRANKLY, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THAT MEANS.

HOWEVER, THERE IS ANOTHER PHRASE. "YOU ARE YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY."

AND THAT'S TODAY'S LESSONS, KUZKETEERS.

I'M STUCK HANGING ON THIS WALL WHILE ANOTHER ME RUINS MY LIFE.

OR HIS LIFE OR OUR LIFE. IT'S SORT OF HARD TO EXPLAIN.

BUT IT'LL MAKE SENSE IF YOU JUST GO BACK TO A LITTLE EARLIER TODAY.

OH. SORRY. EARLIER TODAY, I WAS ALREADY HANGING ON THIS WAY.

HOW ABOUT A LITTLE EARLIER YESTERDAY WHEN MR. MOLOGUACO SAID...

FOR TONIGHT'S HOMEWORK, YOU'RE TO WRITE A PAPER ON "MY BEST FRIEND."

I DON'T KNOW YOUR BEST FRIEND.

NOT MY BEST FRIEND, YOUR BEST FRIEND.

BUT YOU SAID "MY BEST FRIEND."

RIGHT.

YET YOU MEANT YOUR BEST FRIEND?

EXACTLY.

ARE YOU FOLLOWING THIS?

NO. BUT I'M TAKING NOTES.

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WRITE A PAPER ENTITLED "MY BEST FRIEND"

ABOUTYOUR BEST FRIEND.

WHAT ABOUT MR. MOLOGUACO'S FRIEND?

YEAH, HE STARTED IT.

PLEASE RING.

YEP. IT'S ALREADY TIME FOR KUZCO'S DOODLES.

THAT'S THE PART OF THE SHOW WHERE I GET TO WRITE MY "MY BEST FRIEND" PAPER.

WELL, THAT'S EASY.

MALINA, A.K.A. HOTTIE HOT HOTTIE,

IS MY BEST FRIEND.

OF COURSE SHE'S BEST FRIENDS WITH CUCSIE, CURIE, AND CUKA.

SO THAT DOESN'T WORK.

THEN I GUESS MY BEST FRIEND IS DEFINITELY PACHA.

OF COURSE HE LIKES HIS WIFE AND HIS KIDS AND MISTY.

WHAT'S UP WITH HIM LIKING THE LLAMA BETTER THAN ME?

THERE'S BUCKY.

UH, NO.

THAT LEAVES KRONK.

HMM. MAYBE HE COULD BE MY BEST FRIEND

IF I GAVE HIM LIKE COOLER CLOTHES

AND A MOTORCYCLE WITH A SIDECAR,

AND HE HAD ALL THE LATEST STUFF.

OF COURSE YZMA'S HIS BEST FRIEND. GO FIGURE THAT ONE OUT.

WHO'D WANNA BE BEST FRIENDS WITH AN OLD DINOSAUR LIKE HER?

RAGGGH!

I'M THE YZMASAURUS REX.

WRINKLIEST DINOSAUR TO EVER LIVE.

RAGGGH!

HA HA HA! YEAH, SHE'S PRETTY WRINKLY.

OK, SO, WHO IS MY BEST FRIEND?

HOW'S IT GOING? NEED ANY HELP?

YOU'RE WRITING A "BEST FRIEND" PAPER, ARE YOU?

I BET YOU MIGHT NEED HELP 'CAUSE YOU KEEP WRITING AND ERASING

AND WRITING AND ERASING AND WRITING AND ERASING--

I DON'T NEED ANY HELP.

DO EMPERORS EVEN HAVE BEST FRIENDS?

YES. AND I'M WRITING AND ERASING AND WRITING AND ERASING SO MUCH

BECAUSE I CAN'T DECIDE WHICH OF MY EVER SO MANY BEST FRIENDS TO WRITE ABOUT.

SO WHICH ONE DID YOU PICK?

HUH? OH.

UH, I PICKED...

BREAD. UH, BRAD.

BRAD WHO?

RIGHT. RIGHT. BRAD WHO?

HMM.

BRAD...

BOW...

LLAMA.

BRAD BOWLLAMA?

I'VE NEVER HEARD OF A BRAD BOWLLAMA.

YEAH. THAT'S BECAUSE HE'S ALLERGIC

TO LITTLE GIRLS WITH SQUEAKY HIGH VOICES.

BUT THAT'S HIS NAME, AND THAT'S THE TITLE OF MY PAPER.

"'BRAD BOWLLAMA,

MY SUPER COOL AND FUNNY BEST FRIEND,' BY KUZCO."

AHEM. "BRAD BOWLLAMA IS SUPER COOL AND FUNNY,

"AND HE USED TO BE AN EMPEROR, AND HE'S FUNNY.

"HE LIKES EVERYTHING I LIKE,

"AND HE HATES CAULIFLOWER, WHICH I HATE, TOO.

"HE DOESN'T LIKE YZMA EITHER.

"HE THINKS MALINA IS A HOTTIE HOT HOT HOT HOTTIE

"AND SHOULD SPEND MORE TIME WITH KUZCO.

"AND DID I MENTION HE'S SUPER COOL AND HE'S FUNNY? BECAUSE HE IS.

THE END."

ISN'T HE GREAT?

THAT BRAD SOUNDS AWESOME.

I WISH HE WAS MY BEST FRIEND INSTEAD OF YZMASAURUS.

THERE'S NO SUCH PERSON, KRONK. HE MADE IT UP.

WHAT DID YOU DO,

LOOK AT A BOWL AND A LLAMA AND MAKE UP THAT STUPID NAME?

I'M SURPRISED HIS NAME ISN'T BRAD BANANA STAIRCASE HAT.

THAT'S DUMB.

KUZCO, DID YOU MAKE THIS UP?

UH...

YOU KNOW, IT'S OK NOT TO HAVE A BEST FRIEND. I DON'T.

BUT I DO. BRAD, UH...

BOWLLAMA.

RIGHT. SEE? KRONK EVEN KNOWS HIM.

THEN YOU KNOW WHAT? I THINK I'D LIKE

TO MEET THIS SUPER COOL AND FUNNY BEST FRIEND OF YOURS.

WELL, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK HE WANTS TO MEET YOU?

I MEAN, WITH THAT ATTITUDE.

BECAUSE I'M SURE HE WOULDN'T WANT TO LET HIS BEST FRIEND KUZCO DOWN.

AND IF YOU FAIL TO PRESENT HIM,

THEN I'LL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO GRADE YOUR PAPER ACCORDINGLY.

YOU, UH, WANTED TO SEE ME, PRINCIPAL ANTSY?

GET IN HERE, KRONK.

LOOK, I WASN'T CHEATING.

I WAS STRETCHING MY NECK MUSCLES. GOT A PINCHED NERVE.

KRONK, IT'S ME.

WOW. ALL RIGHT, THEN WHO AM I?

Girl: AAH!

YOU'RE KRONK IN UNDERWEAR.

AAH!

I FINALLY GOT THE PERFECT PLAN TO FAIL KUZCO.

TO THE SECRET LAB.

PULL THE LEVER, KRONK.

YOU MIND? I'M SORT OF...SHY.

Voice: FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE,

WE ASK THAT YOU OBSERVE ALL SECRET LAB SAFETY INSTRUCTIONS.

SORRY FOR THE HOLD-UP, FOLKS.

THERE SEEMS TO BE A SLOW-MOVING TRAIN UP AHEAD.

THANK YOU FOR WAITING.

HA-HA! WHEE!

I'VE DONE IT THIS TIME, KRONK.

JUST TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

AAH.

WHEW.

ONCE YOU SPRAY KUZCO WITH THIS POTION,

IT WILL CREATE A KUZCO CLONE.

ANOTHER KUZCO.

THAT SEEMS TO GO AGAINST THE WHOLE "GETTING RID OF HIM" THING.

AH. BUT HERE'S THE TWIST.

THE KUZCO CLONE IS PROGRAMMED TO...

1--TAKE OVER KUZCO'S LIFE,

THEN B--FAIL ALL HIS CLASSES.

OH, I GET IT.

[TICKING]

[BUZZER]

ACTUALLY, I DON'T GET IT.

YOU SNEAK TO PACHA'S HOUSE

AND SPRAY KUZCO THROUGH THE WINDOW WITH THE CLONING POTION.

ONCE THE CLONE IS CREATED, YOU CLIMB THROUGH THE WINDOW

AND BRING THE REAL KUZCO BACK HERE AND LOCK HIM UP,

THUS LEAVING THE KUZCO CLONE BEHIND.

THEN THE KUZ CLONE, AS WE'LL CALL HIM,

WILL FOOL EVERYONE INTO THINKING HE'S KUZCO

AND FLUNK OUT OF KUZCO ACADEMY.

IT'S BRILLIANT. BRILLLLIANT.

YEAH, COULD YOU WRITE THAT DOWN FOR ME?

THE, UH, BULLET POINTS.

JUST GO, KRONK.

AND DON'T MESS THINGS UP.

TIPTOE, TIPTOE, HIDE.

TIPTOE, TIPTOE, HIDE.

TIPTOE, TIPTOE, HIDE.

TIPTOE, TIPTOE, DISGUISE.

IF THERE'S A HAIR GROWING OUT OF IT,

I'D LEAVE IT ALONE.

CLIMB, CLIMB, CLIMB, CLIMB, CLIMB.

CLIMB, CLIMB, CLIMB, CLIMB, CLIMB.

SNEAK, SNEAK, SNEAK.

DIVE.

OH, OH, LEAP.

LADDER.

UP, UP, UP, UP, UP. AND LOOK.

LET'S SEE. I COULD ASK PACHA TO DRESS UP AS MY BEST FRIEND.

BUT HE'S NOT SUPER COOL OR FUNNY OR USED TO BE AN EMPEROR.

HMM. MAYBE I'LL FIRST MAKE A LIST OF EVERYONE I KNOW

WHO IS SUPER COOL AND FUNNY AND AN EMPEROR.

OK. HERE I GO.

THERE'S...

ME.

THAT'S ONE.

AND THERE'S ME. THAT'S TWO.

OK. THIS IS WEIRD.

OK. THIS IS WEIRD.

OK. NOW IT'S WEIRDER.

OK. NOW IT'S WEIRDER.

YOU JUST SAY EVERYTHING I SAY?

NO.

OK, I'M CONCENTRATING.

FIRST I SPRAY KUZCO THROUGH THE WINDOW WITH THE CLONING POTION.

CHECK. NEXT PART OF THE PLAN.

I CLIMB THROUGH THE WINDOW AND TAKE THE REAL KUZCO AND LEAVE THE CLONE.

THROUGH THE WINDOW.

NOT GONNA HAPPEN.

DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN.

AAH!

HEY, KRONK.

THE KRONKSTER.

KRONKITY-KRONK-KRONK.

THE BIG K.

SENOR SPINACH PUFF.

YZMA'S NUMBER 1.

KRONK, NICE OF YOU TO KNOCK.

DID YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS?

I GOT TO GO.

RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY.

I DON'T KNOW.

I WAS SITTING THERE AND THEN...POOF! THERE'S ANOTHER ME.

AND AT FIRST I'M LIKE, "THIS TOTALLY CREEPS ME OUT."

BUT THEN I'M LIKE, "HEY, I TOTALLY GET ALONG WITH THIS GUY."

KUZCO, HOW DO I KNOW WHICH ONE'S REALLY YOU?

EASY. I NAMED HIM BRAD. SAY HELLO, BRAD.

HELLO, BRAD.

THAT'S FUNNY, 'CAUSE IT'S THE KIND OF JOKE I WOULD MAKE.

WAS KRONK HERE?

I JUST SAW KRONK RUNNING DOWN THE--

HEY, PACHA. THIS IS MY NEW BEST FRIEND BRAD.

BUT WHAT'S--

I DON'T KNOW.

BUT I DON'T THINK I CAN HANDLE TWO OF THEM.

UH-HUH. UH-HUH.

Both: UH-HUH, UH-HUH, UH-HUH.

I DON'T BELIEVE IT.

YET HERE HE IS, MR. DOUBTYMcDOUBTERIN. IN THE FLESH.

MY BEST FRIEND BRAD BOWLLAMA.

HOW'S IT GOING, MR. M.?

KUZCO, ISN'T IT A BIT ODD THAT HE LOOKS JUST LIKE YOU

AND SOUNDS JUST LIKE YOU AND ACTS JUST LIKE YOU?

HELLO. THAT'S PART OF HIS SUPER COOLNESS.

HERE. WATCH OUR SECRET BEST FRIEND HANDSHAKE WE MADE UP.

NOT SO SECRET NOW THAT YOU'VE SHOWN THE ENTIRE CLASS.

HMM. DON'T YOU THINK THE NEW GUY LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE KUZCO? WEIRD.

HOW WOULD I KNOW? I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT.

CERTAINLY DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH YZMA.

I MEAN, I DON'T KEEP TRACK OF EVERY LITTLE THING SHE DOES.

HMM. WHERE IS SHE RIGHT NOW?

WELL, LET'S SEE. 10:00, HAIR. 10:30, NAILS.

11:00, ANTI-WRINKLE TREATMENT. I MEAN I DON'T KNOW!

HEY. LITTLE MISTAKE.

THIS IS MY LOCKER.

NO, IT'S MY LOCKER.

YEAH, RIGHT. THEN HOW COME MY NAME...

UH, YOUR NAME IS ON EVERYTHING?

HEY, DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE ONE ABOUT THE LITTLE GIRL

WHOSE LLAMA TOOK HER DOLLY?

SHE YELLED-- GIVE ME BACK MY DOLLY, LLAMA.

YEAH, I LOVE THAT ONE.

RIGHT. YEAH. WAY TO STEAL A PUNCH LINE, BRAD.

OK. HOW MANY YZMAS DOES IT TAKE

TO SCREW IN A LIGHT BULB?

NONE. 'CAUSE SHE TURNED IT INTO A LLAMA.

THAT'S FUNNY, 'CAUSE IT'S TRUE.

OK.

I SHOT A LLAMA IN MY PONCHO.

WHAT HE WAS DOING IN MY PONCHO I'LL NEVER KNOW.

[SHIP'S HORN BLOWS]

THAT'S NOT FUNNY AT ALL, KUZCO.

INJURING AN INNOCENT LLAMA. WHERE'S THE HUMOR IN THAT?

PITIFUL.

BUT...BUT...

COME ON. IT'S FUNNY. RIGHT?

HAV-YAY, OOH-YAY, IN-SAY YOU KNOW WHO-AY

AROUND-AY?

WELL, ACTUALLY--

GOOD. BECAUSE BRAD'S LIKE--UGH! HOW CAN I DESCRIBE THIS?

YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE HE'S GOT A STEERING WHEEL THINGY,

AND HE'S USING IT TO TAKE ME SOMEWHERE THAT'S KOOKY AND WACKO-LIKE.

I'M MAKING SENSE?

BRAD'S DRIVING YOU CRAZY.

RIGHT.

TAKING MY LOCKER, USING MY JOKES.

IT'S LIKE HE'S GOT SOME EVIL PLAN TO TAKE OVER MY LIFE AND RUIN IT.

SO, UH, HOW ABOUT YOU AND ME WALK BACK TO THE VILLAGE?

I'LL CARRY YOUR BOOKS.

HALFWAY.

HEY, MALINA. GOT YOUR BOOKS?

YOU READY TO HEAD ON BACK TO THE VILLAGE?

UM, I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU.

HEY, BEST FRIEND. WE NEED TO TALK.

WILL YOU EXCUSE US FOR A MINUTE? TWO QUESTIONS.

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING AND--

UH, OK. JUST ONE QUESTION.

MALINA'S SUCH A HOTTIE HOT HOTTIE,

I EVEN MADE UP A SONG ABOUT HER.

YOU WANNA HEAR IT? NO, NO. NO SINGY.

AND YOU NO THINKY THAT. ONLY I THINKY HOTTIE.

WE SHARE EVERYTHING, RIGHT? WE'RE BEST FRIENDS.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY BEST FRIEND.

BUT YOU'RE REALLY JUST A FRIEND STEALER.

SO YOU CAN JUST GO FIND ANOTHER BEST FRIEND SOMEWHERE ELSE.

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING, THAT OUR FRIENDSHIP'S OVER, THAT I'M YESTERDAY'S NEWS?

"DON'T CALL ME. I'LL CALL YOU"? I GOT MORE.

NO, NO. COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF.

SO GO ON. GET OUT OF HERE. BYE-BYE.

KUZCO, ARE YOU OK?

I MEAN, LIKE, WHAT'S GOING ON?

WHAT'S THE STORY WITH THAT BRAD GUY?

I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT.

SO WHO'S CARRYING MY BOOKS?

HEY, YOU COMING IN FOR DINNER?

IT'S A MYSTERY STEW NIGHT.

NAH. I'M NOT HUNGRY.

YOU KNOW, I RAN INTO MALINA.

SHE TOLD ME ABOUT BRAD.

YOU GUYS DIDN'T GET ALONG SO WELL, HUH?

YEAH. SOME BEST FRIEND HE TURNED OUT TO BE.

WELL, FRIENDS AREN'T MADE OVER NIGHT, KUZCO,

ESPECIALLY BEST FRIENDS.

WHAT IF I PAID SOMEONE TO BE MY BEST FRIEND? WOULD THAT WORK?

KUZCO, YOU EARN BEST FRIENDS OVER TIME, THROUGH TRUST.

THEY'RE FRIENDS YOU CAN COUNT ON

WHO ARE ALWAYS THERE WHEN YOU NEED 'EM.

WELL, I DON'T NEED ANY FRIENDS, ESPECIALLY BEST FRIENDS,

'CAUSE I'M EMPEROR AND EMPERORS DON'T NEED BEST FRIENDS

'CAUSE THEY ALREADY HAVE EVERYTHING THEY NEED.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I JUST SAID? I THINK IT MADE SENSE.

YOU SAID YOU DON'T NEED A BEST FRIEND.

SO I GUESS THERE'S NOTHING ELSE TO SAY.

GOOD NIGHT.

EHH.

OOMPAH!

OHH.

HEY, LET ME OUT OF HERE.

AAH. WHO'S THAT? OH. THAT'S ME.

HI, ME.

UH, HI THERE.

WOW. THAT LAST SCENE DIDN'T HAVE ANY FUN STUFF AT ALL.

NO FUNNY. JUST DEPRESSING.

AND THAT WHOLE "FRIEND" SPEECH

AND THEN ME GETTING SACK-NAPPED.

BUT YOU GUYS ARE MY FRIENDS, RIGHT?

SO BEFORE WE GO TO BREAK,

I THOUGHT I'D LIGHTEN THE MOOD WITH A LITTLE SING-ALONG KARAOKE THINGY

ABOUT HOW GREAT A FRIEND I AM.

OK, SO THIS IS CALLED THE "KUZCO MAMBO."

AND EVERY TIME YOU SEE THE PICTURE OF ME FLASH ON THE LITTLE SCREEN LIKE THIS,

I WANT ALL OF YOU TO SCREAM "KUZCO!"

OK? GOOD. THIS IS GONNA BE FUN.

SO GO, GO, KUZCO MAMBO!

♪ WHO'S THE BEST FRIEND YOU KNOW? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪

♪ WHO IS MALINA'S BEAU? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪

♪ WHO HAS GOT HIS OWN SHOW? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪

♪ THAT'S ME ♪

CHA-CHA-CHA!

OK. NOW THIS SIDE OF THE TV.

♪ WHO'S THE BEST FRIEND YOU KNOW? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪ OK, NOW THIS SIDE.

♪ WHO'S MALINA'S BEAU? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪ OK, NOW EVERYBODY.

♪ WHO HAS GOT HIS OWN SHOW? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪

♪ THAT'S ME ♪

CHA-CHA-CHA!

SO THIS IS WHERE WE STARTED.

I WAS SACK-NAPPED BY YZMA,

AND NOW I'M HANGING HERE ON THE WALL IN HER SECRET LAB

WITH NO BEST FRIEND.

MEANWHILE, BRAD HAS CONVINCED EVERYONE

THAT HE IS ME,

AND YZMA'S COMMANDED HIM TO RUIN MY PERFECT C-MINUS AVERAGE.

Woman: TODAY IN GYM CLASS...DODGEBALL.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

OH, LOOK AT THESE PITIFUL GRADES.

THE KUZ CLONE'S FAILING SO BAD,

HE GOT A G-.

SAY, YZMA, AREN'T YOU, UH,

SITTING AT PRINCIPAL ANTSY'S DESK?

KRONK, DON'T YOU REMEMBER?

I AM PRINCIPAL ANTSY.

WOW. THAT'S A GOOD TRICK. DO ANOTHER ONE.

OH. LIKE WHAT?

CIRCUS CLOWN! CIRCUS CLOWN!

OH-HA-HA! NOW BE A FUNNY GUARD THING.

HERE'S A HARD ONE.

SEA MONSTER IN A TOP HAT PLAYING A TUBA.

LADY, YOU ARE GOOD.

YES. BUT HERE'S THE OUTFIT I'LL SOON BE WEARING.

EMPRESS YZMA!

AH-HA. AH-HA. HMM.

SO...YOU'RE HUNGRY?

NOT REALLY. I HAD A BIG BREAKFAST.

'CAUSE I WAS THINKING ABOUT HEADING OVER TO MUKKER'S.

OH, MUKKER'S IS ALWAYS GOOD. YOU GO ON. I'LL HOLD DOWN THE FORT.

THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON, MR. MOLOGUACO.

EVEN KUZCO ISN'T THIS DUMB.

HMM. YES, HE DID ANSWER "MAYBE"

TO ALL THE TRUE-AND-FALSE QUESTIONS.

USUALLY, HE JUST CHEATS OFF YOU.

AND DID YOU NOTICE HE APPEARS TO BE SHRINKING?

HEY, YOU. HEY, TWO.

LADIES, KRONK.

AAH! MALINA.

WHAT'S GOING ON, KRONK?

IT'S, UH, MANGO MADNESS DAY IN THE CAFETERIA?

NO. I'M TALKING ABOUT THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING KUZCO.

I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THAT.

FIRST THERE WAS ONE KUZCO. THEN THERE WERE TWO KUZCOS.

NOW WE'RE BACK TO THE ONE HIGH-PITCHED MINIATURE KUZCO.

WELL, THAT'S STRANGE. THE CLONING POTION WAS ONLY SUPPOSED TO--AAH!

I MEAN, UH-- I DIDN'T MENTION A CLONING POTION,

A POTION USED TO CLONE KUZCO.

KUZCO CLONING POTION?

YEAH. THAT POTION.

DO YOU ALSO NOT KNOW WHERE THE REAL KUZCO IS?

♪ WHO'S THE BEST FRIEND YOU KNOW? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪

♪ WHO IS MALINA'S BEAU? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪

♪ WHO HAS GOT HIS OWN SHOW? ♪

♪ KUZCO ♪

♪ THAT'S ME ♪

CHA-CHA-CHA. OHH!

KUZCO.

KUZCO, WHERE ARE YOU?

WHO? WHAT? MALINA?

AND PACHA AND KRONK? WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE?

WE'RE HERE TO GET YOU OUT OF THIS MESS.

THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS DO.

SOMETIMES I HELP YOU GET IN 'EM,

BUT MALINA MADE ME FEEL A LITTLE GUILTY,

SO I THOUGHT I'D HELP YOU GET OUT OF ONE FOR A CHANGE.

YOU MEAN, YOU THREE CAME TO RESCUE ME?

GOTCHA.

[SIREN BLARING] NOW WHAT?

OH, WE TRIPPED THE ALARM.

AHH.

LOOKS PRETTY BAD.

EXCEPT WHAT'S UP WITH THE BUG AND THE MONKEY?

IF YOU FIGURE IT OUT, LET ME KNOW.

COME ON. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

[WHISTLES]

YZMA'S GONNA MAKE ME REBUILD ALL THAT. I KNOW IT.

AND WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?

WELL, ARE YOU GOING TO ANSWER?

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

OH, SORRY. WE THOUGHT IT WAS MAYBE A RHETORICAL QUESTION.

YEAH, SHE'S STANDING THERE LOOKING ALL SCARY AND ALL.

YEAH, IT'S KIND OF CONFUSING.

WE DIDN'T THINK YOU WANTED US TO ANSWER, SO...

WELL, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

OK, UH, WE'RE GOING... TO GET A BURGER OVER AT MUKKER'S MEAT HUT.

YOU WANNA COME WITH?

NAH. I WAS JUST THERE.

MAYBE I'LL CATCH UP WITH YOU LATER.

OK, SOUNDS GOOD.

WOW. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS DID THAT. FOR ME.

HEY, IF YOU'RE GONNA FAIL,

WE WANT YOU TO DO IT YOURSELF.

YEAH. WHAT ARE FRIENDS FOR?

WAIT A MINUTE.

YOU GUYS ARE MY FRIENDS, AREN'T YOU?

YOU WERE THERE WHEN I NEEDED YOU,

AND I CAN REALLY COUNT ON YOU.

HEY, YOU'RE MY BEST FRIENDS.

OH, I'M GONNA WRITE A NEW PAPER, AND I'M GONNA CALL IT...

"'MALINA, PACHA, AND KRONK,

MY REAL SUPER COOL BEST FRIENDS,' BY KUZCO."

AHEM.

"MALINA, PACHA, AND KRONK

"ARE MY REAL SUPER COOL BEST FRIENDS.

THE END."

WELL, IT WON'T WIN ANY LITERARY AWARDS, BUT IT'S TO THE POINT.

BY THE WAY,

WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT BOWL...BRADBLLAMA GUY?

AH, I'VE GOT TO TRY AND PERFECT THAT CLONING POTION.

WHAT FOR? I CAN STILL PULL IT OFF.

BOOM-BAM!

IS IT ME OR ARE YOU GETTING BIGGER?

DO I SOUND FUNNY TO YOU?

"'MY NEW BEST FRIEND,' BY FLACO MOLOGUACO.

"I USED TO NOT HAVE A BEST FRIEND AND THAT WAS OK,

"BUT THAT WAS BEFORE I MET MR. BANANA STAIRCASE HAT.

"HE'S SMART AND HE'S A TEACHER,

"AND HE THINKS IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE A BEST FRIEND, TOO, JUST LIKE ME.

"WE BOTH LIKE WATCHING THE END CREDITS.

ALL THOSE NAMES. ALL THOSE PEOPLE. WHY DO WE CARE?"

[BELCHES] I'M SPEAKING.

"ALSO WE THINK THERE'S ONLY ONE THING BETTER THAN THE END CREDITS

AND THAT'S THE END LOGOS."