Original subtitles

HEY, MY ROYAL TV-WATCHING SUBJECTS,

TODAY'S YOUR LUCKY DAY. WANNA KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE YOU GET TO WATCH MY SHOW, STARRING...ME.

THEME MUSIC.

[♪♪]

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO THE THRONE ♪

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO SUCCESS ♪

♪ BUT HE HAS TO GO TO SCHOOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO ACE THAT TEST ♪

♪ HE'S AN EMPEROR-TO-BE ♪

♪ AND HE'S TOTALLY ♪

YOU KNOW, IT'S ALL ABOUT ME. ♪ AHH ♪

EXACTLY!

LET'S GO!

♪ HE'S GOING TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO LEARN ♪

♪ HIS ABCs ♪

♪ DON'T TRY TO STOP HIM ♪

♪ TO TOP HIM ♪ TO DESTROY HIM,

RIGHT? UHH...

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO! GO, GO!

♪ HE'S GOT THE COOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE CHARM AND THE LOOKS ♪

♪ AND A HOTTIE THAT CAN HELP HIM ♪

♪ READ THAT THING CALLED BOOK ♪

♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOING TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ COME ON, KUZCO ♪

♪ GOT TO FULFILL HIS DESTINY ♪

♪ HIS FRIENDS ARE LOYAL, IT'S ROYAL ♪

♪ THEY'LL HELP AGAINST THE FOIL ♪

FRIENDS? I THOUGHT THIS WAS ALL ABOUT ME.

HEH HEH! SPELL MY NAME AGAIN!

K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO! KUZCO! GO, GO!

[GULP]

[GROWLING]

HANG ON, CHINCHILLA THING!

I, KUZCO, WILL SAVE YOU.

YOU BE MORE CAREFUL FROM NOW ON, LITTLE FELLA.

OK? BYE-BYE.

SO LONG. ADIOS.

[GROWLING]

HEY! MY HOMEWORK!

LOOK, PAL, I WORKED REALLY HARD ON THAT

ALL NIGHT. AND IT'S DUE TODAY.

SO GATOR GIVES IT BACK.

[GULP]

[BURP] Mr. Mulaguako: STOP!

PLEASE STOP!

DON'T... SAY ANOTHER WORD!

BUT I DIDN'T GET TO THE PART WITH MY HEROES PARADE.

[HUMS VICTORY MARCH]

YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR HOMEWORK

WHAT? BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T DO YOUR HOMEWORK.

WHAT? YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME?

NOBODY BELIEVES YOU!

DOES ANYONE BELIEVE HIM?

I BELIEVE THAT HE...

SAW... A CHINCHILLA.

BUT...

BUT HE'S NEVER DONE HIS HOMEWORK...

EVEN ONCE.

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN, KUZCO.

WE'RE TIRED OF HEARING WHAT ATE YOUR HOMEWORK.

BUT NO MORE.

NO MORE ALLIGATORS EATING YOUR HOMEWORK.

NO MORE LIONS OR TIGERS OR BEARS!

OH, MY.

BUT THOSE ALL HAPPENED.

TOMORROW YOU MUST HAVE YOUR HOMEWORK.

NO EXCUSES.

ANY EXCUSE... YOU FAIL.

"ANY EXCUSE, YOU FAIL."

"ANY EXCUSE, YOU FAIL."

I BET HE WOULDN'T SAY THAT IF I ACTUALLYDID MY HOMEWORK.

[WHISTLES] WAIT A MINUTE!

NAH.

HEH HEH HEH! DID YOU HEAR THAT, KRONK?

YEAH. THAT WAS THE WORST MR. MULAGUAKO IMPERSONATION I'VE EVER HEARD.

NO, YOU FOOL. ABOUT HIS HOMEWORK.

TO THE SECRET LAB!

[CHITTERING]

[CHITTERING]

PULL THE LEVER, KRONK.

OHH...

OTHER LEVER, MAYBE?

DO NOT PULL DOWN ON THE SAFETY BAR.

I WILL LOWER IT FOR YOU.

COOL.

AAH! YEOWWW!

YAAAYYY!

[WHEELS SCREECHING]

OHHH! WHERE'D I PUT THE TICKET?

WHERE IS THAT TICKET?

IT'S IN THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT.

WE ALWAYS PUT IT IN THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT.

[DING]

[CHUCKLES MALICIOUSLY]

TOMORROW MORNING, KUZCO WILL HAVE

THE MOST UNBELIEVABLE HOMEWORK EXCUSE EVER!

HA HA HA HA HA HA!

FIRST, I'LL TURN YOU INTO A LLAMA.

THEN YOU'LL FIND KUZCO'S HOMEWORK... HA HA!

...AND EAT IT.

[GULP]

IT'S BRILLIANT, BRILLIANT, BRILLIANT!

AND IT'S A STRAIGHT A-TO-B KIND OF PLAN, TOO. THAT'S NEW FOR YOU.

BUT, UH...

"BUT"? "BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT, BUT,

BUT" WHAT?!

WELL, IT'S JUST...

A LLAMA.

THAT SEEMS SO, YOU KNOW, BEEN THERE, DONE THAT.

WELL, WHAT WOULDYOU SUGGEST, HMM?

OH, I DON'T KNOW. BUT... "A LLAMA ATE MY HOMEWORK"?

THAT'S GOTTA BE THE OLDEST EXCUSE IN THE BOOK.

PRECISELY. HEH HEH.

THAT IS WHAT MAKES IT

SO PERFECTLY UNBELIEVABLE.

RIGHT. THE REVERSE TWIST

ON THE WHOLE HOMEWORK EXCUSE THING.

OH...I'D HATE TO PEEK INYOUR HEAD

AND SEE HOW YOUR MIND WORKS.

LIKEWISE.

HA HA! NOW... GET READY, KRONK.

[GULP]

WEIRD.

NOW, GO!

AH, HA HA HA!

THERE'S HOMEWORK TO EAT.

TYING KNOTS IS STUPID HOMEWORK.

WHEN AM I EVER GONNA HAVE TO TIE

5 DIFFERENT KINDS OF KNOTS?

HEY, WHAT'D YOU GET FOR NUMBER 3?

LLAMA MAN'S OVERHAND HALF HITCH?

HMHH!

OH, IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU

TAKIN' AN INTEREST IN YOUR SCHOOLWORK.

KNOT TYING IS A BASIC SKILL

ALL LLAMA HERDERS NEED TO KNOW.

HEY, NO SNEAKY. SNEAKY NO LIKIE.

HOWEVER, I DON'T THINK IT COUNTS

TO COPY FROM CHAKA.

COPY NO LIKIE.

BUT MR. GUACAMOLE'S GONNA FAIL ME!

YEAH, I HEARD ABOUT THAT.

THE NERVE OF THAT GUY GIVIN' YOU HOMEWORK.

WHO'S HE THINK HE IS, A TEACHER?

FINALLY SOMEBODY UNDERSTANDS!

OH. HA, HA.

DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE SUCH A COMEDIAN.

TIME FOR KUZCO'S DOODLES.

THAT'S THE PART OF THE SHOW

WHERE PACHA IS A COMEDIAN.

OK, THIS IS PACHA, AND HE'S SAYING...

LOOK AT ME. I'M PACHA, AND I'M SO FUNNY.

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. THIS IS MY FUNNY WAY

OF THINKIN' I'M FUNNY. COPY NO LIKIE. BLAH, BLAH.

Kuzco: THEN, KIDS, A MAGIC CIRCLE

FORMED AROUND PACHA'S FEET.

Pacha: OH, NO! IT'S A HOLE!

Kuzco: AND HE FELL DOWN IT, AND HE DESERVED IT

FOR NOT BEING FUNNY.

THE END.

HA HA. I'M FUNNY.

YEAH, YEAH. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING.

BUT YOU GOTTA SEE THIS FROMMY POINT OF VIEW.

MULAGUAKO SAID HE WANTED HOMEWORK, NO EXCUSES.

HE DIDN'T SAY I HAD TO ACTUALLY DO THE HOMEWORK MYSELF.

OF COURSE, MAYBE HE THOUGHT THAT WENT WITHOUT SAYING.

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT? HE SHOULD'VE SAID,

"AND NO TAKING SOMEONE ELSE'S HOMEWORK."

BUT HE DIDN'T. SO...

THERE.

[SLURPS]

WHAT?!

AAH!

NO. NO!

HANHH. A LLAMA ATE MY HOMEWORK.

COME BACK! COME BACK! COME BACK!

KUZCO?

A LLAMA ATE MY HOMEWORK.

OHHH...KUZCO!

HELLO! SLOW DOWN THERE, YOUNG PUP!

WHERE ARE YOU GOIN' IN SUCH A HURRY?

A LLAMA ATE MY HOMEWORK!

OH, THAT'S THE OLDEST EXCUSE IN THE BOOK.

WHAT BOOK?

THIS ONE. HA HA HA HA HA!

HAH HAH HAH!

HEY, WHERE'D HE GO?

[CLOPPING FADES AWAY]

HUH. MY BUTT'S IN AN URN.

KUZCO! [PANTING]

HAVEN'T YOU LEARNED YET THAT ACTUALLY DOING YOUR HOMEWORK

WOULD BE EASIER THAN ALL THIS?

WHAT? LOOK, IDID MY HOMEWORK.

BUT A LLAMA ATE IT!

OHH! YEAH, RIGHT.

THAT'S JUST THE OLDEST EXCUSE IN THE--WHOA.

HOLD UP. YOU DID YOUR HOMEWORK?

UH, THE HOMEWORK I WILL BE TURNING IN

HAS BEEN COMPLETED. YES.

[GASPS] YOU STOLE CHACA'S HOMEWORK!

GEE, HOW DO YOU KNOW?

WHAT WAS THE TIP-OFF? DID MY EYE TWITCH?

KUZCO, I WANT YOU TO GRADUATE AND BECOME EMPEROR.

AND I WANT TO HELP YOU OUT. GOODY!

BUT IF YOU FAKE YOUR HOMEWORK,

YOU ONLY FAKE GRADUATE.

AND THEN YOU'LL BE A FAKE EMPEROR.

AND, UH--

JUST DO YOUR HOMEWORK. IT'S NOT THAT HARD.

BUT...[SIGHS]

I'M THROUGH. THAT'S IT.

THINGS OFFICIALLY CANNOT GET WORSE.

SO, I WENT TO CHECK OVER

CHACA AND TIPO'S HOMEWORK, LIKE ALWAYS,

AND GUESS WHAT I FIND MISSING.

I CAN EXPLAIN.

AND DON'T TELL ME A LION OR A TIGER OR A BEAR ATE IT.

ACTUALLY, IT WAS A LLAMA.

I DON'T WANT ANY LIP, KUZCO.

YOU'RE DOIN' YOUR HOMEWORK AND CHACA'S TOO,

SINCE YOU LOST HERS.

[YAWNING] NO, THAT'S OK.

I ALWAYS SAVE A BACKUP.

GOOD NIGHT.

KRONK! THIS IS THE WRONG HOMEWORK!

LOOK AT THE NAME!

"CHACA'S HOMEWORK."

AH. SO THAT'S HER LAST NAME.

THE HOMEWORK FAMILY. BOY, THAT'S WEIRD.

[THUD]

SNEAK, SNEAK, SNEAK, STOP.

WOWIE, YZMA SURE HAS GOT A TEMPER.

TIPTOE, TIPTOE, TIPTOE, HIDE.

I SHOULD REPORT HER TO PRINCIPAL LAMBSIE.

LOOKIE LEFT, LOOKIE RIGHT.

Kuzco: AND...DONE.

THERE. WASN'T THAT EASIER

THAN CHASING A LLAMA ALL OVER TOWN?

YEAH. MAYBE ACTUALLY DOING MY HOMEWORK WASN'T SO BAD.

BUT DON'T TELL ANYBODY I ACTUALLY SAID THAT.

[SLURPING]

UHH! NO! PACHA! IT'S THE LLAMA!

UNHH! UHH! UHH!

HI THERE. CHECK THIS OUT.

NOW, I WON'T PRETEND TO UNDERSTAND

ALL THE SCIENTIFIC THING-A-MA-DEALIES ON WHAT HAPPENS NEXT,

BUT, YOU KNOW, I HAD WORKED SO HARD ON THAT HOMEWORK,

AND TO SEE IT YANKED AWAY...

[SNIFFLES] WELL, IT MADE MY HEART

GROW 3 SIZES THAT DAY.

[CRASH]

AND GAVE ME SUPERHUMAN STRENGTH!

TIME TO TURN IN MY HOMEWORK.

SUPERHUMAN STRENGTH?

PLEASE, JUST STOP TALKING!

I SAID NO MORE EXCUSES!

YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR HOMEWORK, SO YOU FAIL.

BUT, MR. MULAGUAKO, KUZCO DOES HAVE HIS HOMEWORK. LOOK.

YES.

[CHUCKLES] YES, HE DID IT.

IN FACT, YOUR LLAMA MAN'S

OVERHAND HALF HITCH

IS ABSOLUTELY SUBLIME.

AND--AND JUST LOOK AT THE GOOSENECK

ON YOUR BACKWARD BEND BUTTERFLY KNOT.

EXCELLENT ROPE WORK, MR. KUZCO!

YOU PASS!

WHOA. THAT WORE OFF

A LITTLE FASTER THAN EXPECTED. UH...

EMBARRASSING.

Kid's voices: K-U-Z-C-O!

KUZCO'SNEW SCHOOL! GO! GO!

[WILD ANIMALS CHITTERING]

MODERN CONVENIENCES LIKE CHAIRS AND PILLOWS

AND MEDICINE MEN HAVE MADE US SOFT AND WEAK.

THAT IS WHY SURVIVAL CLASS IS SO IMPORTANT.

TODAY, SOME OF YOUR CLASSMATES

ARE LEARNING UNDERWATER SURVIVAL.

OTHERS... LAVA SURVIVAL.

[LAVA BURBLES]

BUTYOUR GROUP WILL TACKLE JUNGLE SURVIVAL.

CAN WE TAKE OUR BLINDFOLDS OFF NOW?

NO. I HAVEN'T FINISHED MY SPEECH.

I'M SURE YOU'VE HEARD RUMORS ABOUT THIS...

HOW YOU'LL BE STRANDED WITHOUT FOOD OR WATER,

HOW YOU'LL HAVE TO FEND FOR YOURSELVES

AND LIVE OFF THE LAND FOR 24 HOURS.

CAN WE TAKE THEM OFF NOW? YEAH. MINE ITCHES.

NO, NOT YET. WELL, THOSE RUMORS

ARE 100%...TRUE.

WELCOME...

TO THE JUNGLE!

[WILD ANIMAL CALLS]

OK, NOW.

TAKE THEM OFF NOW.

WEARE IN THE JUNGLE.

GOOD CALL.

YEAH. MR. M., THIS SURVIVE STUFF...

COULD YOU BE MORE SPECIFIC?

THE THREE OF YOU MUST WORK TOGETHER

AND USE YOUR COMMON SENSE AND INSTINCT TO SURVIVE.

OH, OK.

ACTUALLY, MORE SPECIFIC THAN THAT.

KUZCO, OUR ANCESTORS LIVED OFF THE LAND

FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS. IT'S EASY.

AAHH! HA HA! FILTHY BEAST!

SHOO! SHOO! [CHITTERING]

SO, ARE YOU GONNA STAY OUT HERE, TOO, MR. MULAGUAKO?

ME? NO. THERE'S A FACULTY COSTUME PARTY TONIGHT.

I'M GOING AS A JUNGLE EXPLORER.

ANYWAY, GOOD LUCK. SEE YOU TOMORROW.

[BIRD SHRIEKS]

HE'S NOT LEAVIN' US HERE, IS HE?

YEP. WE'RE ON OUR OWN.

NO, WE'RE NOT.

UH...YEAH, WE ARE.

NO, WE'RE NOT.

UH, YES, WE ARE!

MR. M. JUST SAID THAT.

WHAT, DID YOU FORGET TO WIND YOUR BRAIN AGAIN?

MY MOM SAYS PEOPLE DEAL WITH STRESS IN 3 STAGES.

I GUESS HE'S IN THE FIRST STAGE-- DENIAL.

AAH! AAH! AAH! AAH!

WE'RE DOOMED!

YUP. THAT'S STAGE 2--PANIC.

AH. IT'S NOT SO BAD.

AND STAGE 3-- ACCEPTANCE.

OK, KRONK, WHY DON'T WE SEE

IF YOU CAN FIND SOME WATER.

HAPPY TO.

HEY, WAIT A SEC.

I'M A JUNIOR CHIPMUNK TROOP LEADER.

I KNOW ALL ABOUT SURVIVAL. WHY WAS I SO WORRIED?

HA HA HA!

WEIRD.

YOU GONNA STRESS OUT, TOO, KUZCO?

ME? NO WAY.

ME NO STRESSIE. MATTER OF FACT,

I AM MR. JUNGLE SURVIVAL.

ME AND THE JUNGLE, WE GET ALONG LIKE...

LIKE...

[PEACOCK CALLS]

I CAN'T THINK OF A "LIKE" THING RIGHT NOW,

BUT THE IDEA IS THAT I LIKE

DENSE UNDERGROWTH AND TANGLED VEGETATION.

YOU LIKE THE JUNGLE? SINCE WHEN?

SINCE ALWAYS.

I'M MORE OUTDOORSY-ISH THAN YOU THINK.

RIGHT, BUCKY?

OH! HE'S EATING ME! DEMON SQUIRREL!

GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!

[CHITTERING]

[CHUCKLES EMBARRASSEDLY] NOW...WHERE WAS I?

RIGHT. KUZCO, WHY DON'T YOU--

GO FIND SOME WOOD FOR A FIRE?

YES. BUT WHY ARE YOU--

VOLUNTEERING TO HELP? I KNOW.

SOMETIMES HELPING ISN'T MY THING.

MAYBE MR. M. WAS RIGHT.

I JUST HAVE TO USE MY COMMON, UH...

SENSE?

YEAH. THAT'S IT.

ARE YOU SURE THOSE KNOTS WILL HOLD?

OF COURSE.

I LEARNED TO TIE KNOTS

DURING JUNIOR CHIPMUNKS YEAR ONE.

UH, LLAMA MAN'S OVERHAND HALF HITCH,

BACKWARD BEND BUTTERFLY KNOT...

I MIGHT BE A... LITTLE RUSTY, THOUGH.

AND KNOTS AREN'T MY STRONG POINT.

SO. LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD USE SOME ROPE.

WHERE'D YOU GET ALL THAT?

I FOUND IT IN THE JUNGLE.

YOU FOUND PILLOWS IN THE JUNGLE?

OH, YOU BET. THEY'RE EVERYWHERE.

JUNGLE PILLOWS ARE SOFT.

THIS STUFF COULDN'T HAVE COME FROM THE JUNGLE.

YOU'RE LYING.

HEY, WHAT DO WE REALLY KNOW

ABOUT JUNGLES ANYWAY, PEOPLE?

MAYBE THESE FELL OFF A PILLOW TREE, HMM? THINK OF THAT?

YOU KNOW, JUST LIKE FRUIT? EXCEPT PILLOWS?

UH...WRONG. WHERE'D YOU GET THIS STUFF?

I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO INSULTED IN MY LIFE!

I TRY TO HELP YOU, AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?

I CAN SEE THAT YOU DON'T WANT MY HELP, SO...

YOU STAY ONYOUR SIDE OF THE JUNGLE,

AND I'LL STAY ON MINE.

WHOA. HE'S REALLY UPSET.

MAYBE WE SHOULD GET HIM A FRUIT BASKET.

ALL WE NEED IS SOME FRUIT.

AND A BASKET.

HE'S NOT UPSET. HE'S HIDING SOMETHING.

COME ON.

[BONGO DRUMS BEATING]

[LOUD RUSTLING]

[WILD ANIMALS CALLING]

[BONGOS PLAYING]

[RUSTLING]

[BONGOS PLAY]

HA! GOTCHA!

[RUSTLING]

HUH. I GUESS MALINA AND KRONK AREN'T FOLLOWING ME.

AND PLAYING BONGOS TO MAKE IT MORE EXCITING.

Malina: I TOLD YOU NOT TO PLAY THE BONGOS.

BUT I LIKE BONGOS.

PULL THE VINE, KRONK.

THAT HAPPENED BEFORE TO YZMA.

OH. OTHER VINE, MAYBE?

HA! KUZCO!

HUH?!

KUZCO CAN HOLD HIS BREATH FOR A REALLY LONG TIME.

[GASPING] WHOOH.

MALINA. KRONK. WHAT A SURPRISE.

I KNEW YOU WERE WAY TOO CALM ABOUT SURVIVING IN THE JUNGLE.

AND NOW I KNOW WHY.

SO, WHAT IS THIS?

OH, THIS? IT'S A PING-PONG PADDLE. WANNA PLAY?

I GET WINNER.

NO, I MEAN THIS CAVE

AND ALL THIS STUFF.

WHAT'S GOIN' ON?

OK, CHECK IT OUT.

THIS IS AN EMERGENCY EMPEROR BUNKER.

IT'S HERE TO KEEP ME SAFE AND COMFY

IN CASE OF AN EMERGENCY.

ISN'T IT GREAT? OOH. LOOK.

HONOR BAR.

KUZCO, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE USING

YOUR COMMON SENSE AND INSTINCT.

OOH, OOH, LOOK AT THIS LITTLE BAG OF COOKIES.

OH, ISN'T IT CUTE?

LITTLE BAG.

LOOK, ME AND MY MOM AND MY SISTER,

WE CAMP ALL THE TIME.

AND KRONK'S A JUNIOR CHIPMUNK TROOP LEADER.

STICK WITH US, AND YOU'LL BE FINE.

REALLY? YOU'D DO THAT FOR ME?

AS LONG AS YOU DON'T GET ALL SAPPY ABOUT IT. RIGHT, KRONK?

CAN WE PLAY PING-PONG FIRST?

THE KEY TO FISHING...

IS PATIENCE.

OK, NOTHING'S HAPPENIN'.

LET'S FIND ANOTHER RIVER.

MY POLE'S, LIKE, BENDING?

IS THIS NORMAL?

HA HA HA! YOU GOT ONE!

YOU GOT A BITE! WE'RE HAVIN' FISH FOR DINNER!

NOW, WE NEED TO MAKE A PAN

AND FIND GARLIC, HORSERADISH, OLIVE OIL,

AND PEPPER FOR THE RÉMOULADE SAUCE.

[SPLASH]

KUZCO?

FISH?

HEY, I BUILT A HOUSE!

IT'S NOT A HOUSE. IT'S A LEAN-TO.

IF YOU SAY SO.

MIND IF I FINISH THE ROOF OF OUR LOVELY HOME?

AS LONG AS YOU NEVER CALL IT THAT AGAIN, SURE.

HA HA! LOOK AT ME. I'M A--

OH!

HOME WRECKER.

WANNA BE A JUNGLE SURVIVOR JUST LIKE ME?

KUZCO'S DOODLES HAS A FEW TIPS

FOR ROUGHING IT KUZCO STYLE.

TIP NUMBER ONE-- CAMPFIRES AND WATER

DON'T MIX.

ESPECIALLY WHEN THAT CAMPFIRE IS COOKING DINNER.

TIP 2--BIRDS DON'T LIKE TO SHARE THEIR EGGS.

ALSO, BIRDS FLY A LOT FASTER THAN WE RUN.

[SCREECHING]

AND BIRDS ARE STRONGER THAN THEY LOOK.

TIP NUMBER 3-- LOTS OF TREES IN THE JUNGLE

LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME... WHICH MEANS

IT'S REALLY EASY TO GET LOST

UNLESS YOU MARK YOUR TRAIL.

TIP NUMBER 4-- DON'T MARK YOUR TRAIL WITH ACORNS...

'CAUSE SOME ANIMALS ACTUALLY EAT THOSE THINGS.

WHATEVER.

TIP NUMBER 5-- PEOPLE GET REALLY MAD IN THE JUNGLE,

ESPECIALLY IF YOU POUR WATER ON THEIR DINNER,

GET THEM ATTACKED BY A HAWK, AND MAKE THEM HOPELESSLY LOST.

COME ON, GUYS. IT'S NOT THAT BAD.

WE HAVE NO FOOD, NO WATER, AND NO SHELTER.

HOW IS IT NOT THAT BAD?

WE STILL HAVE BONGOS. NOPE.

LOST IN THE COLLAPSE OF LEAN-TO NUMBER 6.

SO I LEANED AGAINST THE LEAN-TO.

THE NAME IS VERY MISLEADING.

LOOK, I KNOW I RUINED EVERYTHING

AND YOU GUYS WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT ME.

NO, NO, IT'S TRUE. DON'T ARGUE.

ANYWAY, I JUST WANTED TO THANK YOU.

HEY, I ACTUALLY LEARNED STUFF TODAY.

OH, ABOUT WHAT?

THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T DO IN THE JUNGLE?

EXACTLY! I KNOW MORE ABOUT WHAT NOT TO DO OUT HERE

THAN I EVER WOULD'VE LEARNED IN THAT WARM, COMFY CAVE

FULL OF FRESH FRUIT AND SILK ROBES

AND SCENTED CANDLES AND PING-PONG.

LITTLE BAGS OF HONOR BAR COOKIES? HMM?

HONESTLY...THAT SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD.

ALL I WANT IS JUST ONE GAME OF PING-PONG.

JUST ONE.

OR MAYBE A PING-PONG TOURNEY.

BUT WE DON'T NEED THE CAVE.

ALL WE NEED'S EACH OTHER. RIGHT?

[THUNDER]

OK, CAVE IT IS. LET'S GO.

SO, UH, WHAT SHOULD WE TELL MR. MULAGUAKO?

MR. M.? JUST LEAVE THAT TO THE KUZCO.

LESS TALK...

MORE PONG.

YOUR CAMP IS A DISASTER.

YET YOU ALL LOOK LIKE YOU

JUST STEPPED OUT OF THE SPA. CARE TO EXPLAIN?

YEAH. WE SORT OF STAYED IN AN EMERGENCY EMPEROR BUNKER.

AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT.

MALINA AND KRONK DID EVERYTHING RIGHT,

AND I DID EVERYTHING WRONG.

EXCEPT IN PING-PONG.

I WON EVERY GAME. AND I WAS UNSTOPPABLE.

WAIT!YOU'RE TAKING ALL THE BLAME?

NO! HE'S DELIRIOUS.

AND FOR THE RECORD,

I DON'T THINK THAT PING-PONG TABLE

WAS REGULATION SIZE.

I DID WHAT I HAD TO DO.

IT WAS COLD, DARK, AND RAINING, AND THERE WERE NOISES.

SCARY NOISES. BUT I PULLED US THROUGH.

YOU WANT TO FAIL ME FOR THAT?

YOU GO AHEAD. I CAN TAKE IT.

I'M NOT GOING TO FAIL YOU.

WHOO. THANKS. I WAS BLUFFING.

YOU SURVIVED. YOU USED YOUR COMMON SENSE,

YOUR INSTINCTS. THAT WAS THE ASSIGNMENT.

ALL THE OTHER GROUPS QUIT.

THE UNDERWATER GROUP DIDN'T EVEN WAIT FOR THE SECOND SHARK.

BUT NOT YOU THREE. YOU SURVIVED!

I GUESS I'M A BETTER TEACHER THAN I THOUGHT.

OF COURSE, IF YOU'D LIKE TO TRY AGAIN

WITHOUT THE BUNKER...

YEAH, MY COMMON SENSE SAYS, "ME NO THINK SO."

Kuzco: GUESS WHAT. WE ALREADY GOT A LOT

OF CALLS ABOUT THIS ONE BIT.

RIGHT THERE. SEE THAT?

PEOPLE WANNA KNOW IF THAT KID'S OK.

TRUST ME. HE'S FINE.

THAT SHARK DIDN'T EAT HIM.

NO, IT TOOK HIM GENTLY BY THE HAND

AND WHISKED HIM AWAY TO A HAPPY PARTY

IN THE HAPPY LAND OF VEGETARIAN...SHARKS.

UH...HUH.

WELL, I'M SURE THOSE KIDS ARE FINE, TOO.

HEY, HOW ABOUT WE WATCH SOME LOGOS?