All language subtitles for Mixed-ish.S02E13.WEBRip.x264-ION10

Man: Wow!
Woman: Whoo!

[ "Vacation" by The Go-Go's
playing ]

Rainbow:
To children in the '80s,

a bike meant freedom.

♪♪

So when I got a new one
in the summer of 1987,

my last summer
before high school,

I was about to have
the best time of my --

Dre: Why do you
always do this?

Do what?

Talk about yourself
as if you're an only child.

[ Sighs ]It's very disrespectful

to your terrible brother
and your gold-digger sister.Okay.

Mm-hmm. Very nice.
Mm-hmm.

Dre, I'm on the phone,
so stop.
Okay.

Okay.
Go ahead, Johan.
I'm sorry.

It's okay. I already consulted
my heart chakra,

and she told me
to forgive him.What?

Yeah. Plus, he's right.

Why do you always talk about it
like you were an only child?

I was there, too.
So was Santi.Oh.

Where is Santamonica, anyway?
It's not like her to be late.

Well, it's not like her
to be thislate.

Okay, it's not like her to be
this late and not tell me.

You know what?
I'm gonna add her in.

[ Cellphone chimes ]

Sorry! I'm so close.
I'm just parking.

Santamonica, you are obviously
still at home.

And why do you
look like a cartoon?

Um, don't hate

just 'cause you don't know
what all us kids are doing.

You're 40!

Yeah,
but I don't look it.

This is better
than Botox.

Mm.

And, um, I don't think
I'm gonna be able to make it,

because I think I should just
really be using this time

to promote SantiCoin.Oh, come on.

What?
What's SantiCoin?

The cryptocurrency I started.
Like Bitcoin?

Each SantiCoin
is worth $200,000.

But I'll give it to you
for half 'cause you're fam.Oh, come on. Wait.

You're not coming

to re-create this photo
for Mom's 75th birthday?

Johan:
Unbelievable, Santi.

Also, I'm not going to be
able to make it, either.

[ Scoffs ]

Because I don't want to.
Ohh.[ Sighs]

Radical honesty.Wait. You guys, come on.

Let's just do the photo.
Mom will love it.

And otherwise, you're not
gonna get her anything
unless I remind you.

That may be true, but I don't
want to re-create that photo.

That was a horrible day
for me.

You lost me, remember?

Rainbow: So that last summer
before high school,

I thought I was about to have
the best time of my life,

until I lost my brother.

Do you know how dramatic
you sound right now?

I was just telling her
she always does that.

Okay.

♪ In the mix ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh,
they keep trying ♪

♪ But they can't stop us ♪

♪ 'Cause we got a love ♪

♪ That keeps rising up ♪

♪ In the mix ♪

♪ Life turns around ♪

♪ 'Round and 'round it goes ♪

♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up world ♪♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up ♪

♪ And that's for sure ♪♪ Mixed-up ♪

♪ In the mix ♪♪ Baby ♪

♪ We're gonna get by ♪♪ We're gonna ♪

♪ On our own, side by side ♪

♪ Love's all we need
to be free ♪♪ Lo-o-o-ve is all ♪

♪ I got you, you got me ♪

♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪

♪ I-I-In the mix ♪

♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪

♪ I-I-In the mix-ish ♪

It all started
on my last day of 8th grade.

You guys made it!
It's the first day of summer!

We are so proud of you,

and we totally knew that
all of you would graduate.

Harrison: I just sat through
two graduations.

If hear another child
read a poem,

I'm gonna eat my gun.Okay.

So, since Rainbow
is going to high school

and Johan is going
to middle school

and Santi
is blackmailing me,

I got you something
for your first day.

[ Squeals ]

So everyone
knows your name!
Yeah.

[ Chuckles ]
There we go.

Great! On my first day, everyone
will be staring at my chest.

Bingo. You gonna be unstoppable
once you grow a booty.

Alright, my turn.

And I got you all...

new bikes!

[ Gasps ]
Oh!
Ooh.

Santamonica:
Ahh! No way!

[ Gasps ]

This is a girl's bike.

No.

No,
bikes are just bikes.

And boys can ride
pink bikes,

and girls can ride
blue bikes.

Actually,
it isa girl's bike.

There was a buy-two-get-one-free
deal I couldn't pass up.

But I need a BMX bike
if I want to go

riding down the steps
behind the funeral home.

There was a rumor

Alfonso Ribeiro broke his neck
on those stairs.

Well, I'm excited

to be able to ride this
to high school next year.

Oh, as in [clears throat]
three-miles-away high school?

I was thinking these are
more like indoor bikes.

[ Laughs ] You know,
after some practice,

maybe you can ride them
in the driveway,

go to the mailbox,
when you're ready.

You know, places
where I can see you.

Mom,
I was in Safety Patrol

and voted
"Most Likely to be a Narc."

I'm responsible!
Let me prove it.

Fine. [ Chuckles ]

We need eggs.

Maybe the three
of you guys

can go to the store
and bring some back.

Making me get
a notoriously fragile food

feels like a setup,
but I'm game.

Let's go.

Oh, um, don't forget
the hand signals.

Right.

Left.

Stop.

Emergency.

Emergency.

Emergency?
How is this emergency?

Don't worry, Mom.
I've got this.

[ Sighs ]

See, she's got this.
There's nothing to worry about.

Yeah, you're right.

[ Both chuckle ]

We're following them.Wh--

So while Mom needed to know
we were safe,

Aunt Dee-Dee
needed overtime,

which meant sneaking in
on the weekends

to log her hours watching
"Battle of the Network Stars."

I've seen this one.Oh!

Tony Danza wins.

Oh. Hi.

I was just, um --

Thought I'd
come in to work

and do some extra work
on my day off.

Huh.

[ Papers rustling ]Um...

There. That is filed.
[ Chuckles ]

So you're not here
just inflating your hours?

That's what I got fired
from Pan Am for.

Fool me once.
[ Chuckles ]
Oh.

Well, since you're here

and you're obviously ready
to work hard,

can you go through
all these case files

and organize them
by claim?

Falls with falls,
bites with bites,

things found
in people's chili.

You get the idea.

Uh...

Man, I knew I should have
just stayed home

and chilled with Alicia.

I bet she's just kicking back
and relaxing.

Pedal faster!

Like you've tailed an ex
before.

I haven't.

Is this really necess--
Oh!

Is this really necess--
Gosh, are we on a hill?

[ Groans ]
Gah!

♪♪

Hey, kids!
What's the happs?

Are you following us?

What?!
[ Chuckles ]

No.

I mean, you guys made
bike riding seem so fun.

We just happened
to cross paths.

Hey, girls!
Nice bikes!

I'm not a girl!

Oh. Sorry, buddy.
You just got great hair.

And a pink bike!

Mom, I know
you're checking on me.

You gave me the egg test.
I'm going to ace it.

I know, it's just the world
is a scary place.

Do you know how many people
fall or get bit

or find stuff
in their chili?

You gave me a key
to the house,

but you won't let me
ride a bike?

Ah, good point, Bow-Bow.
We should trust you.

Right, hon?

Right.
[ Chuckles ]

Oh, sorry.
You were talking to her.

Fine.
[ Sighs ]

We'll see you at home.

Don't forget the eggs.Okay.

Be careful.Oh, cool.

Hey, where -- where are
we going next?

Oh, just let me
grab my roller skates.

I can latch onto the bike
with a bungee cord

and go wherever
you guys go!

Okay, guys. Let's get these eggs
and my freedom.

Uh-oh!
I'm still with ya!

Santi,
why are you dancing?

I'm not dancing.
Johan is missing.

Thisis me dancing.

♪♪

Johan, I know that day
was traumatic for you,

but as soon as I realized
that you were lost,

I was devastated.

We have to find Johan,
Santi.

Right after
I get those eggs.

You stay here
in case he comes back.

Johan: Wait -- Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

You weren't devastated.
You went to get eggs.

You know what?
That is so you, Rainbow.

You're supposed to be
the responsible one,

and you left a child
on the street by herself?

I --

A beautiful,
charismatic child?

[ Sighs ]

I need to cleanse.[ Bowl clanging]

Johan, are you eating cereal
out of a Tibetan singing bowl?

♪ I will not be judged
by you ♪

[ Bowl clangs][ Sighs ]

Whew.
Well, that was fun.

We should go tandem bike riding
more often.

[ Chuckles nervously ]

Like right now.

Honey, they're fine.

Why are you making
such a big deal of this?

Because they're my babies,
Paul.

The world
is a dangerous place.

There's the Night Stalker,
Ted Bundy, Satanic cults.

Don't you watch
"A Current Affair"?

No, no, no. Honey, you
can't listen to everything
Maury Povich says.

He said men who lose everything
in a divorce never recover.

But look at me.
I'm thriving.

Do you guys have
any orange juice?

I always get
super dehydrated

after I spend the morning
crying.

Yeah.

Yeah?
Help yourself.

Thank you.
Yeah.

♪♪

You're done already?

[ Scoffs ] I thought you'd be
here at least six more hours.

Yeah,
it wasn't that hard.

But this one
was a little tricky.

The guy slipped on a puddle,
fell down some stairs,

then got bit by a snake
that jumped out of his chili.

But then I realized, since this
all happened in a church,

it goes under
"Acts of God."

Nice.

You know, those files have been
sitting there for weeks.

Nobody could
get through them.

Well,
it was actually nice

to have something that
challenged me for once.

Right now,
the hardest part of my day

is when I have to flip
the water cooler over

to try to get it
on the thing.

The trick is confidence.
Water coolers can smell fear.

Well, you know, if you're up
for a real challenge,

I could use some help
prepping the closing arguments

for "Smith v.
A Wooden Roller Coaster."

So for doing work, I get
rewarded with more work?

Yep. I'm beginning to realize
you're a real go-getter.

If you stay,
could get a promotion.

But only
if you work hard.

That's what this firm
was built on.

Really?

Absolutely.

So...
I'm gonna go play golf.

Johan wasn't at school,

he wasn't at the park,

and he wasn't at
his favorite puddle,

so hopefully
he just came home.

If not, we can just pretend
we never had a brother.

[ Bike thuds ]

[ Indistinct conversation ]

[ Door closes ]

Where's your brother?

He came home.

Uh-oh.
Did you lose him?

Wait, did youlose him?

Johan's still out there?

Yes. But the good news is,
I brought the eggs.

Not helping.
Mnh-mnh.

I'm just gonna say what
everybody's thinking --

this should be
the family.

Thank you, Santi.
Let's go.

Griff, do you mind watching
these two until we come back?

Clearlythey're not ready
to be left on their own.

Clearly!

I-I don't know that I --
I-I really...

[ Door closes ]

♪♪

You guys hungry?

I can make toast and, uh...

Well, just -- just toast.

[ Keys clacking ]I don't know why,

but I think a good closing
statement should rhyme.

"13 kids are in traction,
so we must file a class action."

[ Laughs ]

Denise.

Aren't you supposed
to be golfing?

I was losing, so I faked
an injury, and here I am.

What are they
doing here?
Look,

I could have handled all this
by myself,

but inviting them
was faster.

I'm broke, but I ain't
"come in on a Sunday" broke.

I mean, when she called me
in tears,

I thought it was more
of an emergency.

But that's okay,
I didn't need to stay

for all
of my sister's wedding.

You tricked these people

into coming in to do work
I told youto do?

I thought that --Okay, I'm sorry.

I know you think
you saw more in me,

but I can't handle everything
you think I can.

And I'm sorry you missed
your sister's wedding.

Dolores: Oh, it's okay.
They'll get divorced soon.

She's very unpleasant.

♪♪

[ Phone receiver slams ]

Well, I called Alvin,
and Johan's not with him.

Guess he's really lost.

Johan's getting
all this attention

just because
no one knows where he is?

Getting lost
is not hard.

If I wanted to,
I could totally get lost.

Can you not make everything
about you?

No.

Come on, that's pretty funny
for a 3-year-old.

Okay,
you were 7 years old.

Why do you always make
everything about yourself?

Well, who else am I supposed to
make everything about?

Other people?Yes.

She's not gonna do that.

No, I'm not
gonna do that.

Can you mind
your own business?

You brought me here.

Yes, Dre, because you didn't
want to make your own lunch.

Okay. Alright.Johan: Guys, guys.

All this negative energy
is weighing on me.

I think we should burn sage
on this whole conversation.

Yeah, and you know what?
I'm out on the photo now, too.

Rainbow,
just hit us both up

when you come up with
something better, okay?

Wh-- Well, why don't you guys
come up with something?

Because that's not what we do.
That's what you do.

Duh.

Okay, you know what?

I'm done.

What?
Yeah.

I'm not gonna be
the responsible one anymore.

I'm out, okay?

And I'm not gonna
bail you out

when you forget
that it's Mom's birthday... Hold on.

...and you don't know
what to get her. Just calm down, Bow.

I'm not gonna put your name
on a card,

and I am not
gonna text you

to remind you
that it's Mom's birthday.

But, I --
No.

No buts, you guys, okay?

As far as I'm concerned,
I'm an only child.

That's me.
Goodbye.

[ Cellphone chimes ]

Babe?

What?

Proud of you.

Oh.

You did
what you had to do.

Well, thank you.

Now, if you'd only let me
block their numbers...

Dre, come on.
Okay. Okay.

Too soon.

[ Cellphone ringing ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Ringing continues ]

Gonna get that?

For our entire lives,
I have looked out for them,

and I'm not
doing it anymore.

That ends today.
Boom. Boom.

[ Cellphone stops ringing ]

Look, I was -- I was talking
about this last slice of pizza,

but I -- I get
where your head is.

I helped Johan understand
his mixed identity.

I have always, always
covered for them.
Mm-hmm.

I mean, do you think I like
being the responsible one?

I would like to be able
to change my name, too.

You know, change it because I've
run up my credit card debt

so that I can go run off
to Burning Man.

You do not want to
go to Burning Man.

No, I do not.
Mnh-mnh.

Civilization began
with plumbing.
Yeah.

Rainbow: But if they only knew
how much I did for them.

[ Sighs ]
Alright, I'm out.

Make sure they use a good
picture for the milk carton.

Santi,
this isn't funny.

Johan could have hurt himself
somewhere.

Yeah, trying to show everyone
he's "not a girl."

[ Gasps ]
I know where he is.

You stay here.
I'm gonna go get him.

Okay, but if I end up the only
kid not lost, I'm gonna lose it.

See? I was the one who
figured out where Johan was.

Why are they mad atme?

Boy:
Epic fail, bro!

Heinous wipeout!

Hey, kid, you're next.

♪♪

[ Exhales deeply ]

Johan, wait.

I know why you're doing this,
and you don't have to.

Yes, I do. I have to show
everyone that I'm not a girl.

No, you don't.

We're not the kind of family
that cares about that,

and you shouldn't,
either.

I guess you're right.

Let's go home.

Whoa!

Whoa! Whoa![ Bike rattling ]

Daniel: You're all right,
little dude.

I'm good!

-Denise, Denise. Wait a minute.
-You can't fire me,
because I quit.

-I wasn't gonna do that.
Look, you don't have --
-I'm gonna burn this place down.

But I need you
to know something.

Will you listen to me?

I didn't need your little
nickel-and-dime job anyway.

Will you let me finish?

[ Thump ]

You know, you remind me
a lot of myself.

I was a slacker, too,

and then a mentor saw
I had this ability,

the way I see it in you.

You think
outside the box.

You have
the innate ability

to find simple solutions
to complicated problems.

And delegating to Brad
and Dolores,

you found the two weakest
personalities in this office,

and you exploited them.

That's stuff
you can't teach.

I am very talented.

[ Sighs ]

This isn't a file.
It's a TV.

I want to help you get your
certification as a paralegal.

Now, it's gonna be
a lot of work, but --

but you're gonna make
twice as much.

I'm in.

I'm just gonna make Dolores
do all the work anyway.

I would keep that
on the down-low.

What you know
about down-low?

Mmm. Mmm.

Where are
our children?

Mm!

Uh...

You know, in my defense,

I-I never said I was good
at watching kids.

I actually
made that quite clear.

[ Sighs ]
Look who I found at the stairs.

Oh, thank God!
Come here!

Yeah, turns out
he wasn't lost.

We just didn't know where he was
for a small period of time.

[ Chuckles ]
Hi.

I'm really sorry, Mom.

I know you trust me
to be the responsible one,

and I let you down.You didn't let me down.

I'm just being
overprotective.

You guys are all going
to different schools
for the first time,

and the one good thing
about the commune

is you were never alone.

And also, if you're independent
now, you might not need me.

Oh, well, this one -- this one's
always gonna need you.

Last night,
he choked on some toothpaste.

Mm.

You can ride your bike
to school.

Really?
Yeah.

Thank you!
[ Laughs ]

Well, looks like everyone's
safe, sound, and --

Wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where's Santi?

Oh, that's the little one,
right?

It was so cute.

She grabbed her stuff
and asked where

the nearest Greyhound station
was. [ Chuckles ]

My guess is she's in
the same place she always is

when we can't find her.

♪♪

[ Gasps ]

Turns out I was the one
who was really lost today.

Don't worry,
I've alerted the authorities.

It all worked out, Dre.

[ Cellphone rings ]

They think I'm gonna pick up,
but I'm not.

You know what?
I should be mad at them.

Yeah.
I'm not answering that.

Okay.
I'm not
gonna answer it.

Of course not.I'm not answering
the phone.

Mm.
Not an--

[ Cellphone chimes ]I'm not --

I'm not talking
to you two.

Johan: I-I know.
We owe you an apology.

What?

We know you've always
been there for us.

Rainbow: Oh. So thank you
for pushing me...

literally at times.

Oh.

And for taking on
the burden

of being the one
everyone can count on,

because I-I know
I'd be terrible at it.

Thank you.

Well, um, okay.

I have a confession, too.

Um...
[ Clears throat ]

I actually like being
the responsible one.

Ooh.

I like being the one
that everyone can root for,

the -- the star
of the show.

You're the star --Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.

Iam the star.

My bad.
Okay.

So, guys, you know you can
still make it, right?

Huh? You can still make it,
and we can do this photo!

You coming?

Yeah,
that's a great idea.

There's just
one problem --

I'm actually at CoinCon
in Tampa...

Wh-- ...hiding in the closet
at the convention center.

Yeah, and I've been sitting
in lotus position so long

I can't feel my legs.

But I'll get there
as soon as I can.

Okay. It's fine.

I will --
I'll figure something out.

You always do.

Love you, sis.
Love you.

Love you, too.
Bye, you guys.

Bye.

[ Laughs ]
Dre says bye.

Hurry up, Johan!

Rainbow: Childhood prepares you
to become

the adult you end up being,

whether it's
a carefree wanderer

with an adventurous spirit...

What are you --
[ Laughs ]

...or a confident
entrepreneur

who's never afraid
to take a bet on themselves.

Alicia: You know what?
I have an idea.

Why don't we take a photo of the
kids in their graduation shirts?

Yeah!
You got it.

As for me, I realized

that I was destined to be
a responsible, caring woman

that had a fulfilling
family life...Ready?

...impeccable style,

and a successful career
as a doctor.

Santamonica:
Yes, we get it.

You put people to sleep
for a living.

Johan: I fell asleep three times
during that story.

Okay,
three, two, one.

♪ Forever young ♪

♪ I want to be forever young ♪

[ Knock on door ]

We've got a report of a missing,
"charismatic" child?

Santamonica:
That's for me!

[ Footsteps approaching ]

Hi. I'm missing.

You didn't bring
the news stations?

Uh...
Sorry, Officer.

Yeah, um, we'll talk
to our daughter.

-Yep.
-Yep.

Uh, send someone
who knows

how to shoot
this skin tone.

Okay.
Okay.

Wait, wait, wait,
no, Mom!

Mom! Mom!Okay. Bye-bye.

Please.
No, no!

--Captions by VITAC--