Original subtitles

♪♪

Hang in there, mutt. I can't exactly duct tape this thing shut.

[Cosmo] Cosmo cannot keep Cocoon closed either.

Rocket must flee! Go!

Rocket! You opened the Cocoon?

That's what we've been trying to stop from happening!

Rocket not open Cocoon. And Cosmo cannot stop it opening.

Cosmo, you can talk again!

Wait. Is it still talking if your mouth doesn't move?

Drax, we can't let whatever's in that thing destroy the universe.

[both grunting]

I cannot reach it, Gamora.

Then we gotta teleport it outta here.

Groot, gimme a bridge. I am Groot!

[grunting]

If this thing wants to destroy the universe,

it can do it on the other side of a black hole.

[whirring]

[baby crying]

Wait. Is that... a baby?

[crying continues]

Quill, what do you think you're doing?

[Drax, Gamora grunt]

Huh? [baby cooing]

Put it back, Quill.

That thing could destroy the entire universe.

Ha! How exactly is this burp machine gonna do that?

Even I could not destroy an entire universe at that age.

[grunts] Cosmo tried to read child's mind.

Only one word-- "Warlock."

Warlock was the one being my father Thanos feared in all the universe.

I am Groot.

Really? 'Cause according to Groot here,

Warlock was the savior of his entire race.

To my people, Warlock brought only destruction.

That is why we must have our own destroyer.

You're not destroying this Warlock.

I would never destroy a mere child.

Guardians must be debating later.

Cosmo senses more Believers that want to take baby.

Okay. Cosmo, lock the Continuum Cortex onto the Milano.

We're getting outta here, now.

[Guardians gasp]

The Warlock lives again!

Give us the child now, unbelievers.

You won't take him from me!

I believe we will.

Give us the Warlock, now!

[grunts] Never!

[grunting]

[coos] Cutting it close, aren't we?

Not close enough for my taste.

[grunts] [gasps]

[cooing] Whoa. Nice trick, kiddo.

[grunts] Huh?

[laughing]

Bummer for you guys.

[cooing]

Oh, great Warlock, we are your humble servants,

ready to help you usher in the Golden Age.

[laughing]

Yeah, okay. All this baby worship is just weirding me out.

I am Groot. I am Groot. [laughing continues]

I am Groot, I am Groot.

At least the tyke's on our side.

We can't assume that. He absorbed the Believers' weapons,

but he could just as easily have taken ours,

or pulled us inside that gem again.

Cosmo hears you, but also hears thoughts of more Believers coming.

Guardians must hurry!

[beeping] [whirring]

No!

[Warlock crying]

I ain't ready to be no babysitter!

Not it!

Rocket!

Ugh!

What exactly does it do?

He's a baby, Gamora. He doesn't do anything.

That is untrue. Babies eat, sleep, and...

that thing that happens after eating.

Well, sounds like you have things under control.

Good luck. [fussing]

[crying] Oh, okay. Yeah. He probably just needs a nap.

Now, where can we find...

[singsongy] I am Groot.

Eh, okay! That's what I call a light sleeper.

Peter Quill, what did you do with that Cocoon?

Hey-hey, Nova Prime! Which Cocoon was that now?

The one all of Xandar just saw you with

before it opened up, and the Believers' broadcast cut out.

I am Groot! Oh, that Cocoon.

There's good news. Nothing was inside of it.

Then perhaps you can explain

why the Nova Centurion helmet you gave us is going apoplectic.

Nope.

You know the helmet is connected to the Cocoon, Quill.

That's why I've sent a team of star-blasters to intercept.

So you will hand over to them whatever just came out of that Cocoon,

or they will tear your ship apart bolt by bolt.

Uh, is there a third option, by any chance?

[rumbling] [yells]

[Gamora] We've got Believers on our tail.

[thud] [grunts]

We need more power to the engines.

I gave you all I got, so unless you wanna wish real hard...

[echoing] Wish real hard... Wish real hard...

Wish real hard...

[alarm blaring] Huh.

Inmate Titus, freeze!

Put the helmet down.

Do you have any idea what this is?

No. Of course you don't.

See, if you were an experienced ex-corpsman like myself,

you'd know the legends surrounding this helmet.

And if even half of them are true,

I could rule an entire system with this alone.

[roars]

[alarm continues blaring]

Titus!

Nova Prime. I always thought

you made up those stories about the Centurion helmets

and the original Knights of the Nova Corps.

[grunts]

The all-powerful Warlock?

In the hands of those undeserving scum!

You may not know it yet, Guardians...

but Titus has a score to settle!

Where the krutack are we? I don't know.

That energy surge shot us halfway across the galaxy.

And one guess where it came from.

Thanks for the save, little-- Whoa!

All right. Well, guess we're gonna

have to start saving for college sooner than I thought.

It would appear that Warlock has an accelerated aging process.

[grunts]

[Gamora] That's not all that's accelerated. [laughing]

Hey, no drooling on my stuff!

[laughing continues] Hmm.

So, ya like duct tape, do ya?

Uck cape.

[sighs] That's right.

Now, why don't you be a good little all-powerful cosmic being

and whip me up about 300 more rolls of this stuff?

[gasps]

Uck cape.

Hey, give it back, ya no-good brat.

[grunts] [giggling]

No!

No, no, no, no, no-no, no, no!

[sniffling]

No. No, no, no, no, don't do that. No-- Don't--

[wailing]

[Rocket grunting]

[crying softly]

Clearly the child requires a more constructive form of destruction.

[Drax grunting] [blows landing]

[grunting continues] [Warlock laughing]

Drax, what are you doing?

[laughing continues]

Making fungus and entrail pudding.

A good chef cannot destroy all of existence,

for then he would have nothing left to cook.

[groans]

[laughing] Ugh! Let's clean you up

before you destroy all of existence with that stench.

Mm. Needs more entrail.

[Gamora grunting] Come here! [Warlock crying]

Thanos may have feared you, but I don't, so stop fidgeting.

I am Groot!

[crying continues]

I am Groot.

[groaning]

Oh, stop it, both of you.

He's not a genie or a monster or a cosmic deity.

He's just a kid, okay? [laughing]

So that's how we're gonna treat him.

Whee! [laughing]

Okay, how about a new game?

[gasps] What? Crayons? No way!

Drawing with crayons is way more fun than floating. You wanna try?

Wow. Not what I had in mind, but...

[laughing] [Rocket] I ain't cleaning that!

I've seen this before.

When I wore that Nova Centurion helmet.

These warriors must be the protectors of Warlock.

Protectors or destroyers?

He's got a point.

You can't tell whether these guys are attacking or defending Warlock.

[gasps] Whoa! [grunting]

[all grunt]

I'm gonna go with attacking.

Titus!

Ain't you got a prison cell to crawl back into?

Hmm. I don't believe in destiny. [grunting]

When a Centurion helmet smashed into my prison cell, that was just luck.

When it led me to a cosmic being of immeasurable power, that was just programming.

But when I find the Warlock

in the care of the so-called heroes who imprisoned me,

that is destiny.

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts] You can grow, but you can't run from me.

This helmet makes me immune to being pulled into the prison in your little jewel.

Let me go! What do you want from me?

I will train you, and once I have,

you will destroy Xandar and the Nova Corps for me.

Why? Because they imprisoned me.

Why? Just because I was taking a little extra on the side.

Why? Because I said so!

Stop staring at me.

[mocking tone] Stop staring at me. And don't copy me either.

[clears throat, inhales]

Weapons training first.

I'm sure you have something useful in that gem.

That's not a weapon! [grunts]

[singsongy] That's not a weapon. That's not a weapon.

[grunts, yells]

[yells]

[laughs]

[singsongy] You can't hurt me.

[yells]

[groans]

[Quill on P.A.] Give us back the kid, Titus!

Of all the people to find you,

it had to be the most annoying fools in the galaxy.

How?

[beeping]

Friends come back for you.

You'd know that if you had any.

No! [panting]

[gasps]

Huh?

[Quill] You know this ship has a back door, right?

[grunts] Noooo!

[grunts]

I am Groot!

[grunting]

Huh?

[yelling]

[all grunting]

Will nothing remove this helmet?

[grunts]

I am Groot!

[grunting]

Groot!

Nobody blasts my bud! [yells]

[beeping] Huh?

I'm the one who blasts!

[Titus yells]

[grunts]

Guess I showed him. [groans]

Yeah. He doesn't look real impressed.

[all grunt, groan]

[groans]

As a former space cop, you should know to always bring backup.

[overhead whirring]

Huh?

[yells]

[Titus] I have the ultimate backup.

Destroy them.

Make me.

Very well. Whoa!

Do it, or I destroy your friends.

[gasps]

Blast them, now! [groans]

[gasps]

[yells]

[groaning]

All of them!

Don't do it, Warlock!

Shut up! I'm losing patience, boy.

Stop yelling at me, both of you!

I don't have time for your tantrums!

Pull yourself together!

No! [groans]

[crying]

I don't wanna do this! I don't!

You will do as you're told!

[yelling]

Stop, all of you!

[all grunt]

He's not in control. We have to stop this now.

He's just a scared little kid.

He doesn't wanna hurt anyone. Can you be certain of that?

[laughing]

Finally!

[grunts]

[grunts, groans]

You-- You're not supposed to be able to hurt me.

Your gem's gone dark,

which means you're turning into the force of pure evil

this helmet was created to destroy.

You're fair game now, kid.

That means you're fair game too, kitty-cat.

No! Noooo!

Oh, no! Oh, no, no, no, no, no!

He was right. Titus was right.

I'm bad! Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad!

I know you're trying to do

the right thing, Quill,

but I'm not going back into that gem.

None of us are! [grunting]

[gasps, yells]

[Gamora] Titus was right.

The Nova Centurions existed to protect Warlock

as long as he remained a force of good,

but would destroy him if he ever turned evil.

And this helmet says he's evil now!

[echoing] Evil now... Evil now...

Evil now...

I am Groot.

That kid needs a permanent time-out.

I do not wish to destroy a child.

Even Thanos was a child once.

If you met him then, knowing what you know now, would you have hesitated?

No.

No one is hurting him on my watch.

No one is destroying the universe on my watch, mister.

Warlock, you need to pull yourself together!

Titus said I was bad, and the things he made me do were bad,

and now even the helmet says I'm bad.

No hat gets to decide what you are.

No one gets to decide that but you.

That's what being a Guardian of the Galaxy is all about.

I'm not a Guardian. I can't be.

Why not? My dad's a dictator.

I was raised by criminals, trained to be a thief.

But I'm a hero because I choose to be.

Drax was trained to be a gladiator.

Rocket and Groot were both thrown out.

Gamora was raised by Thanos, the most evil guy I've ever met.

But she chose another way, and you can too.

We believe in you, Warlock.

Don't we, guys?

We believe in you, Warlock.

We believe in you, Warlock.

I am Groot.

Aw! I wanted to shoot a cosmic deity.

Huh?

Thank you. All of you.

I'll never get used to those growth spurts.

Okay. Well, a new destiny means a new name.

From now on, I dub you... Goody Two Shoes.

[laughs] Okay. All right. Okay.

Lighten up with the dark gem.

How about the guy who sang "Goody Two Shoes"?

His name was Adam... something.

Adam Warlock.

I like it.

[overhead whirring]

Peter Quill, I am ordering you to return that Centurion helmet,

or I will bring the full force of the Nova Corps down on your scruffy little head.

It's caused enough trouble already.

That's because it's broken. It must've been damaged

by something very powerful.

There's no cause for alarm, Nova Prime.

The helmet is fine now.

It's going off to find its true purpose.

And I must do the same.

Thank you all for helping me,

but the next part of my journey I must take alone.

However, before I go...

Well, it's good to put things back where you found them.

Best of luck on your journey.

Don't fall in no black holes.

I am Groot.

Whatever I was in another life, I am not the savior of your people in this one.

But you can be.

After all, you are Groot.

So the Warlock has returned.

The entire galaxy will need to be put on high alert.

Nah. Relax, N.P. Adam's a good kid.

He's ridding the galaxy of evil dudes like Titus.

Although storing someone inside yourself

and getting rid of them aren't exactly the same thing.

Nevertheless, it is a good start on the path to righteousness.

Wait. That kid's still got my duct tape!

Get back here, you little thievin' tape-napper!

You ain't binding the universe together with my stash, ya hear me?