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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,269 --> 00:00:05,870 So, Danuta, you still haven't said how you and Marco met. 2 00:00:05,872 --> 00:00:07,747 Oh, no. Here we go. 3 00:00:07,782 --> 00:00:11,343 Well, Marco here is the reigning champion 4 00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:14,879 on a certain quiz show on Langley Public Radio. 5 00:00:14,881 --> 00:00:16,815 Oh, you mean "Oo Oo, I Know That"? 6 00:00:16,817 --> 00:00:18,350 A ding ding dong. 7 00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:19,684 When they asked him 8 00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:22,687 who his favorite philosopher was, he said, 9 00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:25,557 "I Kant remember." 10 00:00:25,559 --> 00:00:27,359 His wit was bone dry, 11 00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,762 but I was quite the opposite. 12 00:00:31,898 --> 00:00:36,701 Okay, soup, this time you're mine. 13 00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:37,970 Ow! 14 00:00:37,972 --> 00:00:40,572 That sneaky stuff just falls off the spoon so fast! 15 00:00:40,574 --> 00:00:43,241 Babe, remember, flip your spoon over 16 00:00:43,243 --> 00:00:44,909 so it's like a little bowl. 17 00:00:44,911 --> 00:00:46,110 Ohhhhh! 18 00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:48,113 Like a little soup bowl 19 00:00:48,115 --> 00:00:49,314 - on a stick! - On a stick. 20 00:00:49,316 --> 00:00:51,249 Yes, Jeff, very good, Jeff. 21 00:00:51,251 --> 00:00:52,985 And how did you two meet? 22 00:00:52,987 --> 00:00:55,387 Oh, it's so hard to recall. 23 00:00:55,389 --> 00:00:57,990 I fell into the touch tank at the aquarium! 24 00:00:57,992 --> 00:00:59,458 Hayley pulled me out. 25 00:00:59,460 --> 00:01:00,725 Oh, that's right. 26 00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:02,461 We're actually going to a benefit 27 00:01:02,463 --> 00:01:04,329 at the aquarium with Johanna this... 28 00:01:04,331 --> 00:01:05,998 Johanna Gurney-Schaffner? 29 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:08,533 The host of "This Way or That" on Langley Public Radio? 30 00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:10,068 Wha...?! You hang out with her?! 31 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,804 Oh, she's a dear friend. 32 00:01:11,806 --> 00:01:14,406 We actually went to the new Alm�dovar film with her 33 00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:17,429 just last night. Unngh! Have you seen it? 34 00:01:17,464 --> 00:01:20,545 Oh, I really wanted to, but Jeff kinda likes to watch 35 00:01:20,547 --> 00:01:21,814 the same movie over and over, 36 00:01:21,816 --> 00:01:23,816 so right now most nights we're watching 37 00:01:23,818 --> 00:01:26,618 "The Land Before Time: The Secret of Saurus Rock." 38 00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:28,887 Hayley has to explain a lot of it to me, 39 00:01:28,889 --> 00:01:31,423 but I'm this close to understanding 40 00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:33,492 that dragons couldn't actually talk. 41 00:01:33,494 --> 00:01:34,893 Dinosaurs. 42 00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:37,095 Dinosnaurs. 43 00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:42,234 ? Good morning, U.S.A. ? 44 00:01:42,236 --> 00:01:45,570 ? I got a feelin' that it's gonna be a wonderful day ? 45 00:01:45,572 --> 00:01:48,507 ? The sun in the sky has a smile on his face ? 46 00:01:48,509 --> 00:01:52,511 ? And he's shinin' a salute to the American race ? 47 00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:57,649 ? Oh, boy, it's swell to say ? 48 00:01:57,651 --> 00:02:00,185 - ? Good... ? - ? Good morning, U.S.A. ? 49 00:02:00,187 --> 00:02:01,387 Aah! 50 00:02:02,589 --> 00:02:05,390 ? Good morning, U.S.A. ? 51 00:02:09,263 --> 00:02:10,462 Ooohhh! 52 00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:11,730 Mmmmmm... Marco! 53 00:02:11,732 --> 00:02:12,931 - Polo! - What? 54 00:02:12,933 --> 00:02:14,266 What? 55 00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:16,535 Wait just one minute. 56 00:02:17,586 --> 00:02:19,037 _ 57 00:02:19,197 --> 00:02:21,740 You were thinking about Danuta's smarty-pants boyfriend! 58 00:02:21,742 --> 00:02:23,141 Jeff, I love you. 59 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,477 I just... I can't even remember the last time 60 00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:27,746 we had an intelligent conversation about anything. 61 00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:30,348 We talked for hours about "Mad Men"! 62 00:02:30,350 --> 00:02:32,350 Because I had to keep explaining 63 00:02:32,352 --> 00:02:33,685 that you didn't have to be scared, 64 00:02:33,687 --> 00:02:35,554 because the men weren't mad at you! 65 00:02:35,556 --> 00:02:37,822 Well, maybe you should watch it with Narco. 66 00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:39,593 - Marco. - Polo! 67 00:02:39,628 --> 00:02:41,025 Ohmygod-why-are-you-so-dumb?! 68 00:02:42,429 --> 00:02:43,628 Jeff, I'm sorry. 69 00:02:43,630 --> 00:02:44,897 I-I just got frustrated. 70 00:02:44,899 --> 00:02:46,899 - Where are you going? - Out! 71 00:02:46,901 --> 00:02:48,433 Jeff, those are my pants. 72 00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:51,303 I know. I happen to, um... 73 00:02:51,305 --> 00:02:54,206 like the way they make my butt look. 74 00:02:55,976 --> 00:02:58,977 Jeff! Lookin' good! 75 00:03:02,027 --> 00:03:04,048 Oh, man, what if Hayley leaves me 76 00:03:04,050 --> 00:03:05,984 because I'm too dumb for her? 77 00:03:05,986 --> 00:03:08,052 Who's gonna tie my shoes?! 78 00:03:08,955 --> 00:03:10,188 'ey. Jeffy-boy. 79 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,324 What up, man? Little moonlight stroll? 80 00:03:12,326 --> 00:03:13,525 Mr. S? 81 00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:14,859 Why are you out so late? 82 00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:16,394 Collecting critters. 83 00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:17,729 Dr. Weitzman needs animals 84 00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:19,864 for a new experiment he's doing at the CIA. 85 00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:21,333 The agent that brings in the most 86 00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:23,535 gets to go to McDonald's in a limo. 87 00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:24,937 Whoa! 88 00:03:24,939 --> 00:03:27,806 Say, Roger was helping me, but he quit on me. 89 00:03:27,808 --> 00:03:29,742 Got bit trying to nab a copperhead snake 90 00:03:29,744 --> 00:03:31,543 and just went straight to the emergency room, 91 00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:32,611 like a quitter. 92 00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:33,678 You wanna help me out? 93 00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:38,683 Mr. S, can I talk to you about something? 94 00:03:38,685 --> 00:03:40,085 Not if I turn on the radio! 95 00:03:42,460 --> 00:03:43,555 Critter! 96 00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:45,958 "This Way or That" is made possible 97 00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:48,807 by the Arthur and Elaine T. McKennon Foundation. 98 00:03:48,842 --> 00:03:51,163 - Get back here, you little... - Creating a brighter generation 99 00:03:51,165 --> 00:03:53,498 through the power of public radio. 100 00:03:53,500 --> 00:03:56,435 - You're coming with me. - And SmutPile.com. 101 00:03:56,437 --> 00:03:58,437 Check it out. Stray dog. 102 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:01,906 Can you change the station? 103 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:05,243 This is that Jo-hannis Grundy ShniffShnaff lady 104 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,979 Hayley loves so much. 105 00:04:06,981 --> 00:04:09,247 Ugh, yeah, I hate this nerd shit, too. 106 00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:11,984 That nerd Francine must've been driving my car. 107 00:04:11,986 --> 00:04:13,830 Let's listen to some Stern! 108 00:04:14,054 --> 00:04:16,054 A lotta people don't know this, 109 00:04:16,056 --> 00:04:19,591 but I was high every day of shooting "City Slickers." 110 00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,726 I'm of course talking about Daniel Stern's 111 00:04:21,728 --> 00:04:23,662 autobiography on Audible. 112 00:04:23,664 --> 00:04:27,566 Also, Jack Palance was soooo strong. 113 00:04:31,405 --> 00:04:33,071 Well, Misterrrr... 114 00:04:33,073 --> 00:04:34,139 Pastafocaccia. 115 00:04:34,141 --> 00:04:36,342 You seem to have fully recovered from your snakebite. 116 00:04:36,344 --> 00:04:38,544 So that just leaves the small matter of... 117 00:04:38,546 --> 00:04:41,279 uh-the bill! 118 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,014 Sweet Child O' Mine! 119 00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:44,816 Why is it so darn much, Doc? 120 00:04:44,818 --> 00:04:47,152 Because antivenom is scarce. 121 00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:49,955 Yeahp, if someone went out right now 122 00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:52,490 and harvested venom from poisonous snakes, 123 00:04:52,492 --> 00:04:54,359 which is what antivenom is made from, 124 00:04:54,361 --> 00:04:56,428 they could make quite the pretty penny. 125 00:04:56,430 --> 00:04:57,763 Why are you telling me this? 126 00:04:57,765 --> 00:04:58,964 I'm a doctor! 127 00:04:58,966 --> 00:05:00,498 I'm all about that sweet 128 00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:04,102 mmmmoneymoneymoneymoneymoney moneymmmoneymoneymoney! 129 00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:05,370 Hmmm. 130 00:05:05,372 --> 00:05:07,973 "Money, money, money, money," you say? 131 00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:09,107 No, like this... 132 00:05:09,109 --> 00:05:10,976 Mmmoneymoneymoney moneymoneymoneymoney... 133 00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:12,978 Oh! Oh, yeah, yeah, moneymoney moneymoneymoney! 134 00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:17,916 Moneymoneymoneymoneymoney moneymoneymoneymoneymoney... 135 00:05:17,918 --> 00:05:19,184 Now eskimo kisses! 136 00:05:19,186 --> 00:05:21,186 Moneymoneymoneymoneymoney moneymoneymoneymoney... 137 00:05:24,524 --> 00:05:27,396 Wait here while I run these bad boys on down to Dr. Dubs. 138 00:05:27,431 --> 00:05:30,252 What kind of experiment is the doctor working on, anyway? 139 00:05:30,287 --> 00:05:31,930 Eh, some kind of experimental surgery 140 00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:34,367 to increase intelligence or some crap. 141 00:05:34,674 --> 00:05:35,867 Do you think he could do it to me? 142 00:05:35,869 --> 00:05:37,135 Dumb guy like you? 143 00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:38,736 I can see why you'd be interested. 144 00:05:38,738 --> 00:05:40,538 But he still hasn't perfected the operation. 145 00:05:40,540 --> 00:05:41,940 Most of these animals'll end up 146 00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:43,942 dimmer than an Amish Christmas tree. 147 00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:48,080 I like that you screeched at my joke, wise old owl. 148 00:05:48,082 --> 00:05:50,249 You I might just keep for myself. 149 00:05:52,286 --> 00:05:54,953 Sure is spooky here after dark. 150 00:05:56,824 --> 00:05:59,091 Aah! Babadook! 151 00:05:59,093 --> 00:06:00,292 I wish. 152 00:06:00,294 --> 00:06:02,282 It's just stupid old me. 153 00:06:02,317 --> 00:06:04,265 I was making ramen on my hotplate 154 00:06:04,300 --> 00:06:05,764 and the dang pot fell on my head. 155 00:06:05,766 --> 00:06:06,832 Oh, phew! 156 00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:08,033 What are you doing here? 157 00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:09,767 My girlfriend kicked me out! 158 00:06:09,769 --> 00:06:12,304 Aw, that's awful, Mr. Whoever-You-Are. 159 00:06:12,306 --> 00:06:15,173 Take it from me, kid, don't ever be in a relationship 160 00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:17,175 with someone smarter than you. 161 00:06:17,177 --> 00:06:18,911 It won't last. 162 00:06:21,315 --> 00:06:22,714 Dr. Wishbone, 163 00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:25,250 I'd like to volunteer for your a-speriment. 164 00:06:25,252 --> 00:06:28,253 Oh, I would love to have a human test subject, 165 00:06:28,255 --> 00:06:31,256 but you should know there's a 99% chance 166 00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:32,724 you'll end up brain-dead. 167 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:35,793 Uhhh, 99 out of a million? 168 00:06:35,795 --> 00:06:39,397 I think I'll take my chances. 169 00:06:44,867 --> 00:06:46,872 - _ - Tell you what, Screechy, 170 00:06:46,874 --> 00:06:50,208 maybe the move is to track down this beautiful sicko. 171 00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:51,943 Score ten dogs at once. 172 00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:54,946 Dad, have you seen Jeff? 173 00:06:54,948 --> 00:06:56,348 He never came home last night. 174 00:06:56,350 --> 00:06:57,683 Oh, yeah, he volunteered himself 175 00:06:57,685 --> 00:07:00,018 for a deadly experimental surgery at the CIA. 176 00:07:00,020 --> 00:07:02,620 What?! Why didn't you stop him?! 177 00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:04,823 I guess I don't care whether he lives or dies. 178 00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:06,492 Ughhh! 179 00:07:06,494 --> 00:07:07,559 Hoo. 180 00:07:07,561 --> 00:07:08,760 Jeff. 181 00:07:13,501 --> 00:07:15,233 Stop this atrocity at once! 182 00:07:15,235 --> 00:07:16,835 Oh, Hayley, I'm glad you're here. 183 00:07:16,837 --> 00:07:19,371 As Jeff's legal guardian, you need to sign this release 184 00:07:19,373 --> 00:07:21,039 before I can do the operation. 185 00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:24,109 You must be suckin' the glass [BLEEP] if you think 186 00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:27,312 I am gonna give Jeff permission to go through with this... 187 00:07:27,314 --> 00:07:29,515 "Intelligence Enhancement"? 188 00:07:29,517 --> 00:07:31,316 Out of curiosity, has this worked 189 00:07:31,318 --> 00:07:33,185 on any of your test animals? 190 00:07:33,187 --> 00:07:36,788 There's one goose that's now in Mensa. 191 00:07:37,858 --> 00:07:40,192 Did I get it right this time, Doc? 192 00:07:40,194 --> 00:07:42,194 Oh, if it isn't Babe. 193 00:07:42,196 --> 00:07:43,729 Hopefully here to stop me 194 00:07:43,731 --> 00:07:46,664 from doing this super dangerous thing. 195 00:07:46,666 --> 00:07:47,933 He's all yours, Doc! 196 00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:49,134 Oh. 197 00:08:09,689 --> 00:08:11,289 Hayley? 198 00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:12,624 Dr. Weitzman? 199 00:08:12,626 --> 00:08:13,691 Smart Goose? 200 00:08:13,693 --> 00:08:15,894 - Did it work? - Let's find out. 201 00:08:15,896 --> 00:08:17,763 Which of the little people 202 00:08:17,765 --> 00:08:20,698 is wearing his hospital gown correctly? 203 00:08:20,700 --> 00:08:22,180 This one. 204 00:08:22,636 --> 00:08:25,503 ...seems to have had a bit of a sartorial snafu. 205 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:29,441 - Hm?! - He's taken his "privates" public, so to speak. 206 00:08:29,443 --> 00:08:31,709 One might even call it an IPO... 207 00:08:31,711 --> 00:08:34,646 an Ignominious Penile Ostentation. 208 00:08:35,715 --> 00:08:38,383 You can honk that again, Squawky. 209 00:08:38,385 --> 00:08:40,718 Now, he will need to avoid marijuana, 210 00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:42,921 which could dull the effects of the procedure. 211 00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:45,723 I can also tell you that is a fake diploma. 212 00:08:45,725 --> 00:08:47,192 He's not wrong. 213 00:08:50,130 --> 00:08:52,664 Ah, Mr. Fischer, welcome back! 214 00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:55,533 Shall I bring for you extra children's menus 215 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:58,536 so you may attempt the maze as many times as you like? 216 00:08:58,538 --> 00:08:59,671 Merci, non. 217 00:08:59,673 --> 00:09:01,339 Une bouteille de Ch�teauneuf-du-Pape 218 00:09:01,341 --> 00:09:03,742 et du pain pour la table, s'il vous pla�t. 219 00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:06,011 You have exposed my secret shame. 220 00:09:06,013 --> 00:09:09,080 I am not French, nor do I speak the language. 221 00:09:09,082 --> 00:09:11,683 Did Jeff take a ten-gallon Gingko enema 222 00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:14,152 this morning or what? 'Cause he seems, like, 223 00:09:14,154 --> 00:09:16,221 a billion times smarter than he used to be. 224 00:09:16,223 --> 00:09:18,223 I know! Isn't it great? 225 00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:20,959 Per te, amore mio. 226 00:09:20,961 --> 00:09:22,694 Say what you will about Seurat. 227 00:09:22,696 --> 00:09:25,096 No one can accuse his art of being... 228 00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:26,965 pointless. 229 00:09:26,967 --> 00:09:29,835 That is so witty, it's almost funny. 230 00:09:29,837 --> 00:09:32,570 You know, Johanna is hosting a small fundraiser 231 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:35,507 for the McKennon Foundation at her lake house this weekend. 232 00:09:35,509 --> 00:09:37,309 You guys should come. 233 00:09:38,446 --> 00:09:40,446 As they say in Reykjav�k... 234 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:47,052 What he said. 235 00:09:49,881 --> 00:09:51,457 So, by now, Barry's going back 236 00:09:51,459 --> 00:09:53,258 to the Steve Madden a third time... 237 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:54,592 Shhh, shh, shut up. 238 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,728 Your story sucks, and I hear a rattler. 239 00:09:58,265 --> 00:10:01,111 Oingo boingo, we got cornbread! 240 00:10:01,146 --> 00:10:02,300 Here. Take some clackers 241 00:10:02,302 --> 00:10:04,295 and work that string bean on outta there. 242 00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,404 What?! Why would I do that?! 243 00:10:06,406 --> 00:10:08,140 Because I'm Chazz Babylon, 244 00:10:08,142 --> 00:10:10,142 Speculative Venom Harvester. 245 00:10:10,144 --> 00:10:11,477 And you're my bag man. 246 00:10:11,479 --> 00:10:13,611 You told me you were Chico Dungaree, 247 00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:15,080 Former Twisted Sister Roadie, 248 00:10:15,082 --> 00:10:17,415 and that we were just going on a nature walk! 249 00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:19,763 Chazz Babylon is a pathological liar. 250 00:10:19,798 --> 00:10:21,019 Now get clackin'! 251 00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:22,220 I will not! 252 00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:24,156 The world needs antivenom, Steve. 253 00:10:24,158 --> 00:10:26,024 Think of how many lives we'll save. 254 00:10:26,026 --> 00:10:28,160 Alright, we can try. 255 00:10:28,162 --> 00:10:30,896 Okay, now first we gotta clack him outta that bush. 256 00:10:33,560 --> 00:10:34,569 Now hold up a second. 257 00:10:34,604 --> 00:10:35,734 I wanna make sure we got a good one. 258 00:10:36,770 --> 00:10:37,903 Ow! It's him! 259 00:10:37,905 --> 00:10:39,771 - And he nipped me! - Oh, my God! 260 00:10:39,773 --> 00:10:41,973 I got nipped! Quick, grab his tail! 261 00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:45,177 Ooh, he's mad now! Oh, he nipped me again! 262 00:10:45,179 --> 00:10:46,578 I got nipped! You get nipped? 263 00:10:46,580 --> 00:10:48,246 Ohh! Yow! I got nipped! 264 00:10:48,248 --> 00:10:49,781 - I got nipped! - I'm gettin' nipped! 265 00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:50,982 - Ohh! - Ow! Oww! 266 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,117 I'm gettin' nipped a whole bunch right now! 267 00:10:52,119 --> 00:10:53,185 - Ow! - Let's bag this sucker! 268 00:10:54,346 --> 00:10:55,453 Get him in there! 269 00:10:55,455 --> 00:10:56,522 Aah! I'm trying! 270 00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:02,460 Ah! We did it, Steve. 271 00:11:04,932 --> 00:11:06,464 Oh, my God. 272 00:11:06,976 --> 00:11:08,200 He doesn't have his clackers. 273 00:11:08,202 --> 00:11:09,935 He's doomed! 274 00:11:12,873 --> 00:11:15,073 Wife. Noun. 275 00:11:15,075 --> 00:11:17,809 A woman who regrets a decision. 276 00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:22,948 What then of "husband"? 277 00:11:22,950 --> 00:11:25,351 The man who begets her derision. 278 00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:27,753 More snaps! 279 00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:30,488 More snaps for you! 280 00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:32,558 Jeff, we simply have to have you 281 00:11:32,560 --> 00:11:34,560 as a contestant on "Oo Oo, I Know That." 282 00:11:34,562 --> 00:11:36,294 Johanna's going to be a guest panelist. 283 00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:39,231 - What do you say, Johanna? - Certainly. 284 00:11:39,233 --> 00:11:41,099 So long as he helps me with this devil 285 00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:43,501 of a New Yorker caption contest. 286 00:11:43,503 --> 00:11:44,702 Any suggestions? 287 00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,438 Hmm... 288 00:11:46,440 --> 00:11:48,706 How about, "I've heard of a bull market, 289 00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:50,508 but this is ridiculous"? 290 00:11:52,179 --> 00:11:55,914 Or, "Of course on the day I wear my red tie." 291 00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:59,585 Or, "Everybody has been saying the new guy is horny." 292 00:11:59,587 --> 00:12:01,853 "Think that belt is real leather?" 293 00:12:01,855 --> 00:12:04,055 "I heard this place had fresh beef, 294 00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:06,258 but this is ridiculous!" 295 00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:10,896 Now you do one, babe. 296 00:12:12,466 --> 00:12:14,399 Uhhhhhhh... 297 00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:16,068 Business... 298 00:12:16,070 --> 00:12:17,603 bull. 299 00:12:17,605 --> 00:12:19,404 - Ugh. That's just... - That doesn't quite connect. 300 00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:20,606 - Nice try, but... - Very, very bad. 301 00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:32,217 What th... A weed gummy? 302 00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:34,620 You know that could affect my treatment! 303 00:12:34,622 --> 00:12:36,755 Oh, my God, a-are you trying to... 304 00:12:36,757 --> 00:12:37,889 sabotage me?! 305 00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:40,158 Playing "Rabbitage" by Weird Al. 306 00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:42,428 ? I'll nab cabbage ? 307 00:12:42,430 --> 00:12:44,229 - Alexa, off! - ? And do my da... ? 308 00:12:44,231 --> 00:12:46,432 You know, Johanna was right about you. 309 00:12:46,434 --> 00:12:49,034 You are pathologically insecure. 310 00:12:49,036 --> 00:12:51,437 Wh... You've been talking to Johanna about us? 311 00:12:51,439 --> 00:12:54,306 First you risk my life to make me smarter, 312 00:12:54,308 --> 00:12:57,042 now you nearly kill me trying to dumb me back down?! 313 00:12:57,044 --> 00:12:58,510 I'm sorry, Jeff! 314 00:12:58,512 --> 00:13:01,046 I-I was scared you were getting too smart for me and... 315 00:13:01,048 --> 00:13:02,780 But I should thank you. 316 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,316 Because now that I am smart, 317 00:13:04,318 --> 00:13:07,986 I finally see what a selfish person you are. 318 00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:09,788 No, Jeff, please don't see that! 319 00:13:09,790 --> 00:13:11,323 I never cared you weren't 320 00:13:11,325 --> 00:13:13,525 the most erudite person in the world. 321 00:13:13,527 --> 00:13:17,996 But I can't be with someone who's downright flagitious! 322 00:13:21,469 --> 00:13:22,800 F-L... 323 00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,870 - It means "villainous"! - I know what it means! 324 00:13:30,239 --> 00:13:32,354 _ 325 00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:34,346 Well, Screechy, he did it. 326 00:13:34,348 --> 00:13:37,082 - He won the Tournament of Champions. - Hoo. 327 00:13:37,084 --> 00:13:39,151 Don't make me say his name, Screech. 328 00:13:39,153 --> 00:13:40,486 Hayley, honey? 329 00:13:40,488 --> 00:13:42,620 The ice cream truck just came by. 330 00:13:42,622 --> 00:13:46,358 I got you one of those [BLEEP]-up Sonic the Hedgehogs. 331 00:13:47,272 --> 00:13:49,961 - Thanks, Mom. - You've just seemed so sad 332 00:13:49,963 --> 00:13:52,430 these last few months since Jeff left. 333 00:13:52,432 --> 00:13:54,366 No, we've both moved on. 334 00:13:54,368 --> 00:13:55,834 He's with Johanna now, 335 00:13:55,836 --> 00:13:58,704 and I'm happy with my new boyfriend... 336 00:13:58,706 --> 00:14:02,307 - Myron. - Dahhh, 'ey 'ayley, lookit! 337 00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:05,177 I knocked it right outta its nest with a rock 338 00:14:05,179 --> 00:14:08,046 from all the way a long ways. 339 00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:09,181 Like, ungh! 340 00:14:09,183 --> 00:14:12,450 Myron, you're gonna get West Nile again. 341 00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:14,953 Aw, you got a Sonic bar? 342 00:14:14,988 --> 00:14:16,053 Gimme! 343 00:14:16,390 --> 00:14:18,524 Let's go ta the old tire factory 344 00:14:18,526 --> 00:14:21,126 'n whip this bird against the big rock! 345 00:14:27,601 --> 00:14:30,402 I wish Stan would take me places. 346 00:14:30,404 --> 00:14:32,804 Waaaaah! Rock-throw! 347 00:14:32,806 --> 00:14:34,472 Million points! 348 00:14:34,474 --> 00:14:36,474 'ey, 'ayley! You see that? 349 00:14:37,411 --> 00:14:40,011 Yes, Myron, very good, Myron. 350 00:14:40,013 --> 00:14:41,880 ? I'll nab cabbage and... ? 351 00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:44,416 Gouda Tenuta, what's nuts? 352 00:14:44,418 --> 00:14:46,017 Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down. 353 00:14:46,019 --> 00:14:47,853 Marco's been missing for how long? 354 00:14:49,557 --> 00:14:52,090 Listen, I've been doing a lot of research. 355 00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:54,360 Every male winner of the Tournament of Champions 356 00:14:54,362 --> 00:14:56,562 has gone missing a few weeks later. 357 00:14:56,564 --> 00:14:59,297 And it has something to do with the McKennon Foundation. 358 00:14:59,299 --> 00:15:01,633 Oh, Hayley, conspiracy theories 359 00:15:01,635 --> 00:15:04,236 are the refuge of the dispossessed. 360 00:15:04,238 --> 00:15:05,904 Kava root ristretto? 361 00:15:05,906 --> 00:15:06,972 Jeff, please. 362 00:15:06,974 --> 00:15:09,307 I think you may be in some kind of danger. 363 00:15:09,309 --> 00:15:10,909 Only of losing my patience! 364 00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:12,978 Clearly, you've transmuted your guilt 365 00:15:12,980 --> 00:15:14,913 over destroying our relationship 366 00:15:14,915 --> 00:15:16,982 into this absurd fairy tale. 367 00:15:16,984 --> 00:15:20,486 Well, enough. It is over between us. 368 00:15:28,929 --> 00:15:30,728 Forget about her, lover. 369 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:34,066 A brighter future awaits us. 370 00:15:34,068 --> 00:15:36,201 Let's play at puns. 371 00:15:36,203 --> 00:15:38,937 "Air Hare", ten letters. 372 00:15:38,939 --> 00:15:41,032 Hmm. Kite Rabbit? 373 00:15:41,067 --> 00:15:43,975 Close. But the answer is actually... 374 00:15:43,977 --> 00:15:45,434 Ether bunny! 375 00:15:46,421 --> 00:15:47,946 Come now, Jeff. 376 00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:49,581 Destiny calls. 377 00:15:52,820 --> 00:15:55,087 Wakey, wakey, milk some snakeys! 378 00:15:55,089 --> 00:15:57,889 Time to get out there again, right back on the horse. 379 00:15:57,891 --> 00:15:58,957 Clack clack clack! 380 00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:01,159 You must be suckin' the glass [BLEEP] 381 00:16:01,161 --> 00:16:03,228 if you think I'm going back out with you. 382 00:16:03,230 --> 00:16:05,096 You were never out to save lives. 383 00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:06,564 You just wanted to make money. 384 00:16:06,566 --> 00:16:08,233 It may have started out being about the money, 385 00:16:08,235 --> 00:16:09,635 but not anymore. 386 00:16:09,637 --> 00:16:11,503 Well, maybe a little. I did sink quite a bit 387 00:16:11,505 --> 00:16:13,505 into having all these T-shirts made. 388 00:16:13,507 --> 00:16:16,775 But otherwise, now it's all about saving lives. 389 00:16:16,777 --> 00:16:19,777 I won't rest until every snakebite victim 390 00:16:19,779 --> 00:16:22,114 has the antivenom they need. 391 00:16:23,557 --> 00:16:24,649 Aah! 392 00:16:25,453 --> 00:16:26,551 Aah! 393 00:16:27,321 --> 00:16:29,387 Aah! Aah! 394 00:16:29,389 --> 00:16:30,722 Aah! Aah! 395 00:16:30,724 --> 00:16:32,424 Aah! Aah! 396 00:16:35,195 --> 00:16:36,394 Aah! 397 00:16:36,396 --> 00:16:37,863 I'm afraid you've single-handedly 398 00:16:37,865 --> 00:16:40,798 depleted the world's entire supply of antivenom. 399 00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:43,935 Many have died, and now you will, too. 400 00:16:43,937 --> 00:16:45,603 Clack's all... 401 00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:46,804 folks. 402 00:16:48,921 --> 00:16:50,142 My Chazz! 403 00:16:50,144 --> 00:16:51,677 Noooooooo! 404 00:16:54,163 --> 00:16:56,682 The Meisterzucht awakes! 405 00:16:56,684 --> 00:16:57,949 Wh-Where am I? 406 00:16:57,951 --> 00:17:01,487 At the threshold of a new age. 407 00:17:01,489 --> 00:17:02,821 Welcome... 408 00:17:02,823 --> 00:17:06,091 to the McKennon Foundation! 409 00:17:06,093 --> 00:17:07,559 Why are you doing this?! 410 00:17:07,561 --> 00:17:10,295 Why, to create a brighter generation, 411 00:17:10,297 --> 00:17:14,432 free of dumdums, dingdongs, and dingalings. 412 00:17:14,434 --> 00:17:16,768 We use "Oo Oo, I Know That" 413 00:17:16,770 --> 00:17:20,706 to identify intellects of the highest genetic caliber, 414 00:17:20,708 --> 00:17:23,375 then harvest their seed to be... 415 00:17:23,377 --> 00:17:25,426 disseminated... 416 00:17:26,514 --> 00:17:29,490 Pun uh-very much intended. 417 00:17:29,850 --> 00:17:32,851 ...to fertility clinics the world over! 418 00:17:32,853 --> 00:17:37,923 And you, Jeff, you are the most smartest one of all. 419 00:17:37,925 --> 00:17:40,058 Der Meisterzucht! 420 00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:41,993 The Master Stud! 421 00:17:41,995 --> 00:17:43,896 Commence milking! 422 00:17:48,001 --> 00:17:50,468 Yaaaaaaawwww, you might think this would feel good, 423 00:17:50,470 --> 00:17:52,271 but it's agonyyyyyy! 424 00:17:57,945 --> 00:18:00,546 Ready the Meisterzucht for harvest! 425 00:18:00,548 --> 00:18:03,415 Wait, no! No, listen... My genes are useless to you. 426 00:18:03,417 --> 00:18:05,951 My intelligence stems from biomedical intervention! 427 00:18:05,953 --> 00:18:08,954 Uh, you don't think we all already tried that old chestnut... 428 00:18:08,956 --> 00:18:11,156 My balls! 429 00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:14,426 Milk the Meisterzucht! 430 00:18:17,565 --> 00:18:19,498 Yah, Myron! Yah! 431 00:18:22,036 --> 00:18:24,035 Myron! Attack! 432 00:18:24,037 --> 00:18:25,771 Rock! Bird! Bird! 433 00:18:25,773 --> 00:18:27,327 Rock! Rat! 434 00:18:29,577 --> 00:18:31,509 Let's get outta here. 435 00:18:38,385 --> 00:18:39,717 You came for me. 436 00:18:39,719 --> 00:18:42,053 Even though it means now you'll die, too. 437 00:18:42,055 --> 00:18:43,388 What can I say? 438 00:18:43,390 --> 00:18:45,723 I think my problem all along has been, 439 00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:47,325 when it comes to you, 440 00:18:47,327 --> 00:18:49,661 I'm just a great big dummy. 441 00:18:50,864 --> 00:18:52,530 We gotta think of a way out of here. 442 00:18:52,532 --> 00:18:54,532 But those are some of the most intelligent people 443 00:18:54,534 --> 00:18:55,734 in the world out there. 444 00:18:55,736 --> 00:18:57,669 - We'll never outsmart them. - No. 445 00:18:57,671 --> 00:19:00,272 But we may be able to outstupid them. 446 00:19:00,274 --> 00:19:03,008 I need to be dumb again, so I can think up a plan 447 00:19:03,010 --> 00:19:05,343 so stupid they could never expect it. 448 00:19:05,345 --> 00:19:07,813 How? We don't have any weed! 449 00:19:07,815 --> 00:19:11,016 The answer's as easy as autolobotomy. 450 00:19:16,156 --> 00:19:19,625 Have you ever wondered what the colors on maps mean? 451 00:19:19,627 --> 00:19:21,759 They gotta mean something. 452 00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:23,862 Quick, what's your stupid plan? 453 00:19:25,365 --> 00:19:27,099 Since Vaseline is clear, 454 00:19:27,101 --> 00:19:30,235 once we cover ourselves in it... 455 00:19:30,237 --> 00:19:32,170 ...we become absolutely, 456 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:35,173 one-million-percent invisible. 457 00:19:35,175 --> 00:19:37,709 Oh, wow, this is stupid. 458 00:19:37,711 --> 00:19:39,645 Seize them! 459 00:19:41,982 --> 00:19:43,048 Ugh! 460 00:19:44,918 --> 00:19:47,886 Uch, they're too damn slippery! 461 00:19:48,588 --> 00:19:49,988 Whoo! 462 00:19:56,997 --> 00:19:58,796 The Spank Tank! 463 00:19:58,798 --> 00:20:00,399 All our precious seed! 464 00:20:07,340 --> 00:20:09,840 _ 465 00:20:09,943 --> 00:20:11,943 C'mon, Snugglesaurus, 466 00:20:11,945 --> 00:20:14,812 we can still make it to the Great Valley. 467 00:20:14,814 --> 00:20:15,881 You know what I'm wondering? 468 00:20:15,883 --> 00:20:17,415 If we maybe should've tried to save 469 00:20:17,417 --> 00:20:18,950 those other men in that basement? 470 00:20:18,952 --> 00:20:20,085 No. 471 00:20:20,087 --> 00:20:22,287 Do you think all the dinosnaurs stayed friends 472 00:20:22,289 --> 00:20:24,289 when they were done shooting the movie? 473 00:20:24,291 --> 00:20:26,892 Babe, don't ever change. 474 00:20:26,894 --> 00:20:29,128 Have a great night! 475 00:20:30,964 --> 00:20:32,631 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com 33239

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