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1
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Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
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Oh, man. This Share the Wealth
protest has me all jacked up.
3
00:00:08,651 --> 00:00:10,571
I'd be down there right now
4
00:00:10,604 --> 00:00:12,915
yelling "Eat the 1%"
with the rest of my people
5
00:00:12,947 --> 00:00:16,430
if I wasn't in this COVID death window.
6
00:00:16,463 --> 00:00:17,928
Your people?
7
00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:21,866
Your people had kids that
had kids that made these people.
8
00:00:21,898 --> 00:00:25,413
Hey, I've never lost
my taste for social justice.
9
00:00:25,446 --> 00:00:27,432
I let my freak flag fly.
10
00:00:27,463 --> 00:00:28,701
Check it out.
11
00:00:28,733 --> 00:00:31,207
Three piercings in one ear.
12
00:00:31,239 --> 00:00:33,485
It's kinda hard to see 'cause
I let two of 'em close up.
13
00:00:33,518 --> 00:00:36,318
My mother said I looked like a whore.
14
00:00:36,350 --> 00:00:38,434
Hey, I thought someone was
going to call the exterminator
15
00:00:38,465 --> 00:00:40,972
to set a trap for this thing.
16
00:00:41,004 --> 00:00:44,683
Come on, Becky. We're sisters,
and we're bigger than this.
17
00:00:44,714 --> 00:00:46,864
Forget that I got your pay docked
18
00:00:46,896 --> 00:00:49,533
and come over here and braid
my hair, like you used to
19
00:00:49,564 --> 00:00:52,494
at our summer chateau by the lake.
20
00:00:52,526 --> 00:00:54,382
Could you two stop for one second?
21
00:00:54,414 --> 00:00:56,368
Society's problems
are a lot more important
22
00:00:56,399 --> 00:00:57,539
than your stupid sibling fights.
23
00:00:57,571 --> 00:00:58,710
I can't hear. Shut up.
24
00:00:58,743 --> 00:00:59,883
You shut up!
25
00:01:01,446 --> 00:01:03,886
Well, I have a different
perspective on all this.
26
00:01:03,919 --> 00:01:06,295
As a former magazine publisher
27
00:01:06,328 --> 00:01:08,312
and a proud member of the 1%,
I feel that...
28
00:01:08,345 --> 00:01:11,308
[Laughs] Are you out of your damn mind?
29
00:01:11,339 --> 00:01:14,172
You know how much money you have
to make to be part of the 1%?
30
00:01:14,204 --> 00:01:17,524
[Chuckles] The "1%" isn't
a specific thing, Darlene.
31
00:01:17,556 --> 00:01:20,128
It's just a general idea.
32
00:01:20,161 --> 00:01:22,180
No, it's not. It's an actual number.
33
00:01:22,212 --> 00:01:25,336
The lowest you can make
and be a part of the 1%
34
00:01:25,368 --> 00:01:29,078
is $254,000 a year
if you live in Mississippi.
35
00:01:29,111 --> 00:01:32,693
[Laughs] You're not even
a rich person in Mississippi.
36
00:01:32,725 --> 00:01:34,516
Well, if I ever get back into the 1%,
37
00:01:34,548 --> 00:01:36,956
I'm gonna oppress all you people.
38
00:01:36,989 --> 00:01:40,667
Okay, last call for rent.
Come on. Cough it up.
39
00:01:40,700 --> 00:01:42,750
Papa's got his eye on a new fur
for the winter.
40
00:01:42,781 --> 00:01:44,735
Thank you.
41
00:01:44,767 --> 00:01:46,494
Are they still protesting?
42
00:01:46,526 --> 00:01:49,097
All that marching around
just clogs up the streets
43
00:01:49,129 --> 00:01:51,180
so nobody can get downtown.
44
00:01:51,212 --> 00:01:54,273
Dad, you haven't been to
downtown Chicago in 30 years.
45
00:01:54,305 --> 00:01:57,072
Well, now that I can't go, I want to.
46
00:01:57,103 --> 00:01:58,535
Grandpa, they're blocking the streets
47
00:01:58,569 --> 00:02:00,196
to fight a corrupt system
48
00:02:00,228 --> 00:02:01,920
designed to keep the working class down.
49
00:02:01,953 --> 00:02:02,832
Hey.
50
00:02:02,866 --> 00:02:05,795
If you pay Mr. Working Class
here the rent,
51
00:02:05,827 --> 00:02:08,854
he can buy me a pound cake
we can eat in bed later.
52
00:02:08,885 --> 00:02:10,742
How long you been sitting on that idea?
53
00:02:11,751 --> 00:02:14,615
I haven't been to work yet to get
my paycheck. I'll get it later.
54
00:02:14,648 --> 00:02:16,080
But could you guys please stop?
I'm trying to listen.
55
00:02:16,113 --> 00:02:18,099
Okay, no. I gotta do one thing first.
56
00:02:18,131 --> 00:02:19,595
I want to see the final round
of "Jeopardy!"
57
00:02:19,627 --> 00:02:20,734
Hey!
58
00:02:20,767 --> 00:02:22,655
["Jeopardy!" think music plays]
59
00:02:22,687 --> 00:02:24,673
"Who is Apollo Creed?"
60
00:02:24,706 --> 00:02:26,595
Come on! That's a gimme!
61
00:02:27,668 --> 00:02:30,369
When the corporations start
kidnapping all you poor people
62
00:02:30,402 --> 00:02:32,551
and using you to colonize Mars,
I'm gonna laugh.
63
00:02:34,373 --> 00:02:35,349
Crap.
64
00:02:35,373 --> 00:02:37,084
That's gonna happen.
65
00:02:39,171 --> 00:02:43,563
3x06
Protest, Drug Test And One Leaves The Nest
66
00:02:43,595 --> 00:02:50,060
♪♪
67
00:02:50,085 --> 00:02:58,639
♪♪
68
00:02:58,671 --> 00:03:06,763
♪♪
69
00:03:06,797 --> 00:03:15,087
♪♪
70
00:03:15,118 --> 00:03:16,467
[Pounding]
71
00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:17,553
Damn it!
72
00:03:17,585 --> 00:03:19,352
Hey, Becky.
73
00:03:19,386 --> 00:03:21,413
Hey, thanks for the visitor's pass.
74
00:03:21,446 --> 00:03:22,819
Did you sell a lot of sandwiches?
75
00:03:22,851 --> 00:03:24,585
Oh, yeah. Oh, crushed it!
76
00:03:24,618 --> 00:03:26,286
When you've got a building
full of depressed people
77
00:03:26,317 --> 00:03:27,691
trying to eat their feelings,
78
00:03:27,724 --> 00:03:28,935
you can charge whatever you want
79
00:03:28,967 --> 00:03:31,257
for a stiffening
ham and cheese sandwich.
80
00:03:31,289 --> 00:03:32,859
- You want one?
- Sure. Thanks.
81
00:03:32,892 --> 00:03:34,233
[Laughs]
82
00:03:34,264 --> 00:03:35,606
Oh, my Go...
83
00:03:35,640 --> 00:03:37,536
Juanita!
84
00:03:37,568 --> 00:03:40,382
Man, we worked together here
back in the day.
85
00:03:40,413 --> 00:03:42,311
Yeah. Online poker.
86
00:03:42,344 --> 00:03:43,489
Still gotta work.
87
00:03:43,521 --> 00:03:45,353
Oh!
88
00:03:45,384 --> 00:03:47,314
Well, this takes me back.
89
00:03:47,348 --> 00:03:49,930
This is where Roseanne and I hid
90
00:03:49,964 --> 00:03:51,927
after we dropped our pants
91
00:03:51,958 --> 00:03:54,248
and pressed ham
against the lobby window.
92
00:03:54,281 --> 00:03:57,879
My side of the window
was unlocked, and I fell out!
93
00:03:57,910 --> 00:03:59,711
Yeah, I saw it.
94
00:03:59,742 --> 00:04:01,574
We just got off the bus
for the school tour
95
00:04:01,607 --> 00:04:02,425
when they did it.
96
00:04:02,457 --> 00:04:05,695
[Laughs] And that's why we did it!
97
00:04:05,728 --> 00:04:07,985
Thanks for that.
It made me super popular.
98
00:04:09,882 --> 00:04:11,648
Oh, damn it!
99
00:04:11,679 --> 00:04:12,891
I got to call Beverly Rose.
100
00:04:12,923 --> 00:04:14,624
Lunch break is almost over.
101
00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:16,717
Oh, hey, Emilio.
102
00:04:16,750 --> 00:04:19,857
Hi, Beverly Rose!
103
00:04:19,888 --> 00:04:21,262
Robin.
104
00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:22,800
Becky.
105
00:04:22,825 --> 00:04:24,348
Look, honey!
106
00:04:24,378 --> 00:04:27,639
It's the horrible woman
who docks my pay when I see you.
107
00:04:27,673 --> 00:04:29,177
Hi, cutie!
108
00:04:29,210 --> 00:04:30,748
Make better choices than Mommy!
109
00:04:30,779 --> 00:04:33,069
Okay, everyone, listen up.
110
00:04:33,102 --> 00:04:36,078
New policy at Wellman...
everyone will be required
111
00:04:36,111 --> 00:04:38,269
to provide urine under supervision
112
00:04:38,302 --> 00:04:39,905
for random drug screenings.
113
00:04:39,937 --> 00:04:41,442
Two questions.
114
00:04:41,474 --> 00:04:43,403
What do you mean "under supervision"?
115
00:04:43,436 --> 00:04:46,151
And do you consider a drug
something that grows,
116
00:04:46,183 --> 00:04:48,833
you know, naturally behind your garage?
117
00:04:50,370 --> 00:04:53,282
Supervision means
a stranger is going to watch you
118
00:04:53,313 --> 00:04:56,126
take your pants down
and urinate into a cup.
119
00:04:57,137 --> 00:04:58,448
Wow. Way to sell it, Robin.
120
00:04:58,480 --> 00:04:59,723
I'm not trying to sell it.
121
00:04:59,757 --> 00:05:01,850
I think it's wrong
and I'm not gonna do it.
122
00:05:01,883 --> 00:05:03,614
You all have to do
what your conscience tells you.
123
00:05:03,647 --> 00:05:05,577
I'm quitting.
124
00:05:05,610 --> 00:05:07,933
I have enjoyed working with all of you.
125
00:05:07,965 --> 00:05:09,307
Except Becky.
126
00:05:12,968 --> 00:05:15,847
I can't believe Robin's quitting
over a drug test.
127
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:17,777
If I made the kind of money she made,
128
00:05:17,808 --> 00:05:20,687
I'd pop a squat on the pitcher's
mound at Wrigley Field.
129
00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:24,122
It's obvious. She's not clean.
130
00:05:24,153 --> 00:05:26,509
Ohhhhhhhh.
131
00:05:26,542 --> 00:05:28,014
What do you think she's on?
132
00:05:28,045 --> 00:05:29,975
Peruvian Marching Powder?
133
00:05:30,008 --> 00:05:31,120
Horse with No Name?
134
00:05:31,153 --> 00:05:33,540
Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds?
135
00:05:33,573 --> 00:05:35,307
Some of that stuff
will make you show your ass
136
00:05:35,340 --> 00:05:38,839
and fall out a window, I'll tell ya.
137
00:05:38,870 --> 00:05:44,333
♪♪
138
00:05:44,366 --> 00:05:46,164
Why are you taking back
all the twigs and leaves
139
00:05:46,197 --> 00:05:48,782
that help us forget what we're eating?
140
00:05:48,813 --> 00:05:51,952
I'm tired of busting my ass
cooking for you people.
141
00:05:51,986 --> 00:05:53,949
Not only do they not appreciate it,
142
00:05:53,981 --> 00:05:55,486
but they complain about them.
143
00:05:55,518 --> 00:05:57,350
The other day, I used peppercorns.
144
00:05:57,382 --> 00:05:59,378
Darlene picked them all out and said,
145
00:05:59,410 --> 00:06:00,881
"Something pooped in my soup."
146
00:06:00,914 --> 00:06:02,876
I understand. We're philistines!
147
00:06:04,511 --> 00:06:07,455
Did I use that word right?
148
00:06:07,488 --> 00:06:09,450
Look, Dan, I gotta go home.
149
00:06:09,484 --> 00:06:10,628
I'm used to living alone,
150
00:06:10,661 --> 00:06:13,179
and there's just too many people here.
151
00:06:13,210 --> 00:06:16,057
I'm in the shower, and Becky
comes in to use the bathroom,
152
00:06:16,090 --> 00:06:18,118
and then I'm using the bathroom,
153
00:06:18,149 --> 00:06:20,537
and Harris comes in to brush her teeth.
154
00:06:20,569 --> 00:06:23,938
Did you know that now
I'm flossing in the closet
155
00:06:23,971 --> 00:06:25,248
just to get some peace?
156
00:06:27,176 --> 00:06:29,334
Who could I kill?
157
00:06:29,367 --> 00:06:31,068
I'll thin out the herd for you.
158
00:06:31,101 --> 00:06:32,998
[Chuckles]
159
00:06:33,031 --> 00:06:36,007
No, Dan, you know, we talked about this.
160
00:06:36,039 --> 00:06:38,101
You knew I'd have to go home eventually.
161
00:06:38,132 --> 00:06:41,926
Yeah, but I didn't think you'd
actually follow through on it.
162
00:06:41,959 --> 00:06:43,561
If I followed through on everything
163
00:06:43,593 --> 00:06:44,738
I said I was gonna do,
164
00:06:44,772 --> 00:06:47,585
I'd be nothing but muscle
and we'd be sleeping on gold.
165
00:06:48,598 --> 00:06:50,723
♪♪
166
00:06:50,756 --> 00:06:52,947
Look at that wall of moms
out there protecting their kids
167
00:06:52,980 --> 00:06:54,714
at the front of the protest line.
168
00:06:54,746 --> 00:06:57,787
I mean, they're out there taking
beanbag rounds to the face,
169
00:06:57,821 --> 00:06:59,653
and you won't even get up
to get me a soda.
170
00:07:01,352 --> 00:07:04,067
That's because their kids
are out there protesting,
171
00:07:04,099 --> 00:07:07,109
not leading the "occupy-the-couch-
and-bitch" movement.
172
00:07:07,141 --> 00:07:08,614
You want me to go out there?
173
00:07:08,646 --> 00:07:10,444
Well, all I'm saying
is you're laying there
174
00:07:10,477 --> 00:07:12,898
and whining about us not doing anything.
175
00:07:12,930 --> 00:07:14,435
If this was really
that important to you,
176
00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:16,103
you'd be out there with everybody else.
177
00:07:16,135 --> 00:07:17,084
Okay.
178
00:07:19,014 --> 00:07:20,355
Wait. You're really going?
179
00:07:20,387 --> 00:07:21,401
You're right.
180
00:07:21,434 --> 00:07:23,757
I mean, I'm being a hypocrite
just sitting there
181
00:07:23,789 --> 00:07:25,784
while everybody else
is out there changing things.
182
00:07:25,816 --> 00:07:28,727
All right, well, stay six feet
away from everybody,
183
00:07:28,759 --> 00:07:30,297
and if anything goes down,
184
00:07:30,329 --> 00:07:32,978
you just yell "I'm pregnant"
and run into a bookstore.
185
00:07:33,011 --> 00:07:34,581
No one's looting bookstores.
186
00:07:34,614 --> 00:07:35,890
See you on TV.
187
00:07:37,885 --> 00:07:38,931
[Door closes]
188
00:07:38,963 --> 00:07:40,403
Wow!
189
00:07:40,434 --> 00:07:41,972
Well, I didn't see that coming.
190
00:07:42,005 --> 00:07:43,869
You actually inspired your daughter
191
00:07:43,902 --> 00:07:47,239
to go out and stand up
for what she believes in.
192
00:07:47,271 --> 00:07:48,547
Yeah, that was pretty cool.
193
00:07:48,579 --> 00:07:50,770
I was just trying to make her feel bad.
194
00:07:50,801 --> 00:07:54,106
♪♪
195
00:07:54,139 --> 00:07:56,233
No rush, but could you write me
a check for the rent
196
00:07:56,265 --> 00:07:58,227
while I stand here and stare at you?
197
00:07:58,259 --> 00:07:59,403
Already done.
198
00:07:59,436 --> 00:08:00,386
I gave it to Louise
199
00:08:00,417 --> 00:08:02,250
while she was shaving her legs
in the shower.
200
00:08:03,427 --> 00:08:05,389
Oh, and, um...
201
00:08:05,421 --> 00:08:07,940
Harris is going to have a problem
202
00:08:07,973 --> 00:08:09,281
covering her share this month.
203
00:08:09,313 --> 00:08:10,328
Why?
204
00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:12,813
Because she texted me this morning
205
00:08:12,845 --> 00:08:15,331
that she doesn't want to go back
to work until the protest is over,
206
00:08:15,363 --> 00:08:17,817
and her boss said that
if she's not there tomorrow,
207
00:08:17,850 --> 00:08:18,668
he's gonna let her go.
208
00:08:18,700 --> 00:08:20,140
Damn it, Darlene!
209
00:08:20,171 --> 00:08:22,265
You gotta talk some sense into that kid.
210
00:08:22,298 --> 00:08:24,980
Yeah, but, Dad, this is
the only time in her life
211
00:08:25,012 --> 00:08:26,059
that she can do something like this.
212
00:08:26,091 --> 00:08:28,766
She wants to have her voice
heard, and I-I get it.
213
00:08:28,791 --> 00:08:30,681
- [Exhales sharply]
- Look, maybe...
214
00:08:30,705 --> 00:08:32,043
maybe I can cover her part of the rent.
215
00:08:32,076 --> 00:08:33,646
This is all your fault.
216
00:08:33,686 --> 00:08:35,876
You made her think she was special.
217
00:08:35,903 --> 00:08:37,864
Where'd you get that?!
218
00:08:37,897 --> 00:08:40,350
You didn't get it from me.
I made a point of never telling
219
00:08:40,383 --> 00:08:43,491
any of you kids you were special.
220
00:08:43,531 --> 00:08:47,357
And yet somehow, we're all
successful and happy anyway.
221
00:08:47,382 --> 00:08:49,672
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have
to get back to the Senate.
222
00:08:49,705 --> 00:08:51,438
♪♪
223
00:08:54,250 --> 00:08:55,362
♪♪
224
00:08:55,394 --> 00:08:57,586
I need to talk to you for a minute.
225
00:08:57,618 --> 00:08:58,895
[Door closes]
226
00:08:58,927 --> 00:09:01,348
If you've got a knife, I've got a gun.
227
00:09:01,379 --> 00:09:03,735
I'm not here to stab you, 'cause
everyone would know it was me.
228
00:09:05,076 --> 00:09:05,926
[Sighs]
229
00:09:05,958 --> 00:09:07,920
Look, I think
I know why you're quitting.
230
00:09:07,952 --> 00:09:09,032
I told you why I'm quitting.
231
00:09:09,065 --> 00:09:10,733
Did you?
232
00:09:10,765 --> 00:09:11,944
Would you say something different
233
00:09:11,976 --> 00:09:13,743
if I told you
I'm a recovering alcoholic?
234
00:09:14,756 --> 00:09:17,241
I would say there's no secrets
on an assembly line,
235
00:09:17,274 --> 00:09:19,499
and you're the fourth person
to tell me that you're a drunk.
236
00:09:20,806 --> 00:09:22,834
Gossip is cruel,
but surprisingly accurate.
237
00:09:24,044 --> 00:09:27,936
I'm here because,
as much as I don't like you,
238
00:09:27,969 --> 00:09:29,473
if you have an addiction problem,
239
00:09:29,505 --> 00:09:31,370
you need to go to meetings,
240
00:09:31,403 --> 00:09:33,431
and...
241
00:09:33,463 --> 00:09:35,263
I'll go with you if I have to.
242
00:09:35,294 --> 00:09:38,173
[Chuckles] Wow.
243
00:09:38,205 --> 00:09:40,397
Why are you offering to help me?
244
00:09:40,429 --> 00:09:42,587
Well, for one, you're my boss,
245
00:09:42,620 --> 00:09:46,348
and I plan to continue to be
a really marginal employee.
246
00:09:46,381 --> 00:09:47,493
That's a given.
247
00:09:47,526 --> 00:09:48,638
And?
248
00:09:48,670 --> 00:09:50,503
And I got pregnant
249
00:09:50,536 --> 00:09:53,217
and had to get sober for my baby.
250
00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:55,507
And I always thought...
251
00:09:55,539 --> 00:09:58,254
if somebody had offered to help me,
252
00:09:58,287 --> 00:09:59,955
I might've stopped sooner.
253
00:09:59,986 --> 00:10:02,571
Darlene's wrong about you. You're okay.
254
00:10:04,009 --> 00:10:05,645
I'm not quitting to avoid the drug test
255
00:10:05,677 --> 00:10:07,608
because I'm an addict.
256
00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:08,818
I'm trans.
257
00:10:09,962 --> 00:10:12,513
Whoa. Plot twist.
258
00:10:12,546 --> 00:10:14,999
Now you get why I'm not comfortable
with supervised testing.
259
00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:16,831
I totally get it.
260
00:10:17,778 --> 00:10:20,788
You shouldn't be forced to
come out if you don't want to.
261
00:10:20,819 --> 00:10:22,422
Oh, no, no. [Chuckles]
262
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:24,483
I came out a long, long time ago.
263
00:10:24,516 --> 00:10:26,412
All of my husbands have known.
264
00:10:26,445 --> 00:10:29,127
My friends know, my family knows.
265
00:10:29,159 --> 00:10:31,449
It's the people that don't know
and don't need to know.
266
00:10:31,482 --> 00:10:32,791
It doesn't matter to my dry cleaner,
267
00:10:32,822 --> 00:10:34,261
and it doesn't matter at work.
268
00:10:34,294 --> 00:10:36,192
But it's not fair that you have to quit.
269
00:10:36,223 --> 00:10:38,284
It's not worth the PTSD.
270
00:10:38,317 --> 00:10:40,541
That happens a lot in our community.
271
00:10:40,573 --> 00:10:43,223
Movies like "Ace Ventura,"
where all the men vomit
272
00:10:43,255 --> 00:10:44,563
because they find out
the woman is trans,
273
00:10:44,597 --> 00:10:46,363
doesn't make you want to share stuff.
274
00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:47,376
Maybe they were vomiting
275
00:10:47,410 --> 00:10:50,288
because they found out
they were in "Ace Ventura."
276
00:10:50,319 --> 00:10:51,235
[Chuckles]
277
00:10:52,936 --> 00:10:56,240
Everybody hates the idea
of supervised drug testing.
278
00:10:56,272 --> 00:10:58,234
We'll fight it!
279
00:10:58,267 --> 00:11:00,197
I don't want to.
280
00:11:00,228 --> 00:11:02,486
I fought my battles.
281
00:11:02,518 --> 00:11:05,757
It's taken a long journey
to get this freakin' happy,
282
00:11:05,789 --> 00:11:07,359
and it's not worth going back.
283
00:11:08,437 --> 00:11:09,452
I get it.
284
00:11:10,695 --> 00:11:12,787
But you know we're still
gonna fight it, right?
285
00:11:12,820 --> 00:11:14,718
How long have you been sober?
286
00:11:14,751 --> 00:11:15,961
Over a year.
287
00:11:15,993 --> 00:11:17,825
Thank you for asking.
288
00:11:17,857 --> 00:11:20,572
I asked because I want to see
how stable you are.
289
00:11:20,604 --> 00:11:23,417
I just trusted you
with something very private.
290
00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:25,576
Oh, I wasn't that kind of a drunk.
291
00:11:25,608 --> 00:11:27,080
I just slept with a lot of people.
292
00:11:27,112 --> 00:11:28,454
Very little talking.
293
00:11:31,069 --> 00:11:33,065
[Cheering on television]
294
00:11:33,097 --> 00:11:34,176
[TV shuts off]
295
00:11:34,209 --> 00:11:35,975
I'm going.
296
00:11:36,008 --> 00:11:38,298
Look, I left you something
in the fridge,
297
00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:41,896
but knowing your family,
it's probably just a plate by now.
298
00:11:41,928 --> 00:11:44,839
But... what if I can't sleep?
299
00:11:44,872 --> 00:11:46,768
I'm used to cuddling up with you.
300
00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:48,633
You'll be fine.
301
00:11:48,665 --> 00:11:51,119
Just watch "Shark Tank"
and imagine me saying,
302
00:11:51,150 --> 00:11:53,734
"No one would ever buy
anything that stupid,"
303
00:11:53,766 --> 00:11:55,959
and you saying, "I'd buy it right now."
304
00:11:58,183 --> 00:11:59,459
I'll text you when I get home.
305
00:12:05,442 --> 00:12:06,521
Ah.
306
00:12:06,554 --> 00:12:09,532
How can I be behind where
my parents were at my age?
307
00:12:09,564 --> 00:12:11,297
Mm.
308
00:12:11,329 --> 00:12:13,128
That sounds like a serious question,
309
00:12:13,161 --> 00:12:15,484
and I'd really like
to help you out, but...
310
00:12:15,516 --> 00:12:17,184
I got high in the driveway.
311
00:12:19,603 --> 00:12:20,945
When I was Harris's age,
312
00:12:20,978 --> 00:12:22,449
I got to rage against the machine
313
00:12:22,481 --> 00:12:24,248
and try to fix the world.
314
00:12:24,282 --> 00:12:27,878
You know, I was protesting
for vegan food in the cafeteria
315
00:12:27,910 --> 00:12:30,233
and I was against
female genital mutilation.
316
00:12:30,267 --> 00:12:31,346
Oh!
317
00:12:31,378 --> 00:12:32,849
Who's for that?
318
00:12:34,256 --> 00:12:35,892
I'll give you a hint.
319
00:12:35,924 --> 00:12:37,396
It's not women.
320
00:12:37,429 --> 00:12:39,130
Is it men?
321
00:12:41,090 --> 00:12:42,628
It's men, isn't it?
322
00:12:44,133 --> 00:12:46,161
But that's not my point.
323
00:12:46,193 --> 00:12:48,418
I mean, Harris can't do any of that
324
00:12:48,451 --> 00:12:50,641
because I can't cover her rent.
325
00:12:50,674 --> 00:12:51,622
[Sighs]
326
00:12:51,655 --> 00:12:54,010
I guess I could stop
saving for Mark's college
327
00:12:54,041 --> 00:12:55,906
or maybe stop paying the dentist.
328
00:12:55,939 --> 00:12:57,574
I mean, once he finds out
he's not going to college,
329
00:12:57,607 --> 00:13:00,223
he's got nothing to smile about anyway.
330
00:13:00,256 --> 00:13:02,807
Oh, let yourself off the hook.
331
00:13:02,839 --> 00:13:05,357
You know, most kids
don't get to protest.
332
00:13:05,391 --> 00:13:06,569
You know?
333
00:13:06,601 --> 00:13:08,596
Some kids have to actually work
334
00:13:08,629 --> 00:13:10,559
in those factories that make the phones
335
00:13:10,591 --> 00:13:12,357
so that other kids can find out
336
00:13:12,390 --> 00:13:14,222
what time they're supposed to be
at the protest.
337
00:13:16,478 --> 00:13:17,884
Whoa, that's heavy.
338
00:13:19,487 --> 00:13:21,188
Thanks, Spicoli.
339
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:27,172
All right, I-I gotta go tell her
she's got to come home.
340
00:13:27,205 --> 00:13:29,854
Are we gonna get fired
for just walking off our jobs?
341
00:13:29,887 --> 00:13:31,098
Hey, not if we all stick together.
342
00:13:31,130 --> 00:13:32,930
This is where
they're gonna do the testing,
343
00:13:32,961 --> 00:13:35,610
and they can't do it
if we refuse to leave.
344
00:13:35,644 --> 00:13:37,933
You don't even work here anymore.
345
00:13:37,965 --> 00:13:41,072
I want to belong to something!
Leave me alone!
346
00:13:41,105 --> 00:13:42,675
Well, I'm fine with protesting,
347
00:13:42,708 --> 00:13:45,619
'cause nobody's gonna see
my flower besides my husband.
348
00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:48,365
Thanks for ruining flowers
for me, Carla.
349
00:13:48,398 --> 00:13:49,902
Okay, I've never done this before,
350
00:13:49,934 --> 00:13:51,865
but I know if we just stay in here,
351
00:13:51,898 --> 00:13:54,809
production shuts down and they
have to negotiate with us.
352
00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:56,149
What's going on?
353
00:13:56,181 --> 00:13:57,718
We can't have this many people in here
354
00:13:57,750 --> 00:13:59,093
at one time during COVID.
355
00:13:59,125 --> 00:14:01,349
And there's gonna be a lot more of us!
356
00:14:01,381 --> 00:14:04,194
You tell your bosses...
no supervised drug testing,
357
00:14:04,226 --> 00:14:05,960
no more protests.
358
00:14:05,993 --> 00:14:07,529
I'll tell 'em, but just so you know,
359
00:14:07,562 --> 00:14:09,263
I'm coming back with more security.
360
00:14:09,296 --> 00:14:10,539
Okay.
361
00:14:10,572 --> 00:14:12,535
Don't make it easy
for them to drag us off.
362
00:14:12,566 --> 00:14:14,955
Everybody, down on the ground.
363
00:14:14,987 --> 00:14:18,160
This is passive resistance.
Gandhi did this.
364
00:14:18,193 --> 00:14:20,318
I saw that movie.
He didn't do it in the bathroom!
365
00:14:21,691 --> 00:14:22,640
Come on!
366
00:14:22,673 --> 00:14:26,271
♪♪
367
00:14:26,303 --> 00:14:30,031
Hey! Thank you so much
for bringing me the gas mask!
368
00:14:30,063 --> 00:14:32,745
Uh... what are you doing? That's lunch.
369
00:14:32,778 --> 00:14:34,903
I know. I'm a revolutionary now.
370
00:14:34,936 --> 00:14:36,572
I can't have my mom bring me lunch.
371
00:14:36,604 --> 00:14:38,371
Well, there's no caviar in there,
372
00:14:38,404 --> 00:14:40,040
if that's what you're worried about.
373
00:14:40,072 --> 00:14:41,904
Listen.
374
00:14:41,935 --> 00:14:44,453
I know that I encouraged you to do this,
375
00:14:44,487 --> 00:14:47,560
and I am so proud of you
for coming out here
376
00:14:47,593 --> 00:14:49,588
and putting yourself on the line
for something you believe in.
377
00:14:49,621 --> 00:14:51,125
But...?
378
00:14:51,159 --> 00:14:53,122
No, there's no "but."
379
00:14:53,153 --> 00:14:56,195
And I think it's time
for you to go back to work.
380
00:14:56,227 --> 00:14:58,353
[Scoffs] I told you I can't do that.
381
00:14:58,385 --> 00:15:00,577
Okay, well, if you don't
contribute to the rent,
382
00:15:00,609 --> 00:15:02,998
then your "Share the Wealth"
protest here is gonna be
383
00:15:03,030 --> 00:15:05,353
"Share That Little Tent
With the Rest of Your Family."
384
00:15:05,386 --> 00:15:06,857
We'll figure something out,
385
00:15:06,890 --> 00:15:08,459
but I'm not leaving here
until it's over.
386
00:15:08,492 --> 00:15:10,259
No, we did figure something out.
387
00:15:10,291 --> 00:15:11,960
We're all paying rent.
388
00:15:11,992 --> 00:15:14,969
Harris, I know it sucks, but poor people
389
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,616
can't afford to quit their jobs
to make things better.
390
00:15:17,649 --> 00:15:19,677
Poor people are the ones
with the most to lose.
391
00:15:19,709 --> 00:15:21,181
Why shouldn't they be on the front line?
392
00:15:21,214 --> 00:15:23,798
Because we can't
take the time off to do it.
393
00:15:23,831 --> 00:15:26,480
In my little story earlier,
maybe I wasn't clear...
394
00:15:26,512 --> 00:15:28,671
we're the poor people.
395
00:15:28,704 --> 00:15:30,372
Okay, well, that's your fault.
396
00:15:30,404 --> 00:15:32,825
I mean, maybe if your generation
did what my generation is doing,
397
00:15:32,857 --> 00:15:35,866
instead of wearing ironic
T-shirts trying to make a point,
398
00:15:35,899 --> 00:15:38,221
then you wouldn't be begging
your daughter to pay your rent.
399
00:15:38,254 --> 00:15:39,758
You know what? This isn't about begging.
400
00:15:39,791 --> 00:15:41,460
This is about taking responsibility.
401
00:15:41,492 --> 00:15:43,095
You have a job.
402
00:15:43,127 --> 00:15:45,025
And my generation did stuff.
403
00:15:45,056 --> 00:15:46,135
I tried to go to Lilith Fair.
404
00:15:46,167 --> 00:15:48,293
That was a big old woman thing.
405
00:15:48,326 --> 00:15:50,943
You know, if I was in college,
this is what I would be doing.
406
00:15:50,975 --> 00:15:52,643
But I'm not, because I have to work.
407
00:15:52,676 --> 00:15:54,607
You know what? You're right.
408
00:15:54,639 --> 00:15:56,994
Nobody shared the wealth with you.
409
00:15:57,026 --> 00:15:58,530
I'm sorry. But you know what that means?
410
00:15:58,563 --> 00:16:00,361
You gotta work to pay the rent.
411
00:16:00,394 --> 00:16:02,095
And you know what happens if you don't?
412
00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:03,862
You find someplace else to live.
413
00:16:03,895 --> 00:16:05,267
I can live right here.
414
00:16:05,299 --> 00:16:07,950
Great. See you in January.
415
00:16:07,982 --> 00:16:10,075
Don't come crying to me
when the wind comes off the lake
416
00:16:10,107 --> 00:16:11,809
and knocks you
right off your toilet bucket.
417
00:16:11,841 --> 00:16:15,046
♪♪
418
00:16:16,864 --> 00:16:19,384
- Mind your business!
- Not our business!
419
00:16:19,409 --> 00:16:22,013
- It's our business!
- Not your business!
420
00:16:22,045 --> 00:16:24,270
Eh, not poppin'.
421
00:16:24,303 --> 00:16:26,233
Come in tomorrow with three new chants.
422
00:16:27,703 --> 00:16:30,254
Ladies, it's David Wellman.
I'm coming in.
423
00:16:30,288 --> 00:16:33,787
Look, you all have to
go back to work right now.
424
00:16:33,818 --> 00:16:36,796
We want to go back to work,
but you have to promise
425
00:16:36,828 --> 00:16:39,347
to let employees
take our drug tests in private.
426
00:16:39,379 --> 00:16:40,655
That's right.
427
00:16:40,686 --> 00:16:43,925
Oh, my God. Is that you, Jackie Harris?
428
00:16:43,958 --> 00:16:47,392
I thought you'd be in a cult
or a... or a nuthouse by now.
429
00:16:47,425 --> 00:16:49,813
I've dabbled in both.
430
00:16:51,414 --> 00:16:53,410
Look, it's a matter of safety.
431
00:16:53,441 --> 00:16:55,699
Would you want someone who's high
432
00:16:55,731 --> 00:16:57,889
operating the heavy machinery
around here?
433
00:16:57,922 --> 00:16:59,885
Okay. I get that.
434
00:16:59,917 --> 00:17:01,781
But we don't need to be violated
435
00:17:01,814 --> 00:17:04,627
by having some creepy stranger watch us.
436
00:17:04,659 --> 00:17:07,668
Would you be more comfortable
if it was someone you know?
437
00:17:07,701 --> 00:17:09,632
We're not letting you watch, Wellman.
438
00:17:10,775 --> 00:17:12,574
I guess if we knew the woman.
439
00:17:12,607 --> 00:17:14,995
I'd pee in front of a Christian woman.
440
00:17:15,026 --> 00:17:17,382
Okay, well... how about Becky here?
441
00:17:17,415 --> 00:17:19,509
You all put your jobs
on the line for her, right?
442
00:17:19,540 --> 00:17:21,437
[Women agreeing]
443
00:17:21,470 --> 00:17:25,362
I'm honored and humbled
by the opportunity.
444
00:17:25,394 --> 00:17:26,769
Thanks a lot.
445
00:17:27,848 --> 00:17:29,320
Good job, Beck.
446
00:17:29,352 --> 00:17:30,529
We did it!
447
00:17:30,562 --> 00:17:33,147
You don't work here.
448
00:17:33,178 --> 00:17:33,997
Whoo!
449
00:17:38,607 --> 00:17:40,406
How'd it go?
450
00:17:40,439 --> 00:17:41,487
I'm the new test monitor.
451
00:17:42,893 --> 00:17:44,331
You don't have to quit now.
452
00:17:44,363 --> 00:17:45,378
Thank you.
453
00:17:45,410 --> 00:17:47,831
Sisters got to hang together.
454
00:17:47,862 --> 00:17:49,630
Get your lazy ass back to work, Becky.
455
00:17:53,847 --> 00:17:54,861
Hope you're happy.
456
00:17:54,894 --> 00:17:55,646
[Door closes]
457
00:17:55,680 --> 00:17:57,250
I just left behind all the people
458
00:17:57,282 --> 00:17:58,853
who are risking everything
to make a change
459
00:17:58,885 --> 00:18:01,959
because I had to come back
to support my pathetic family.
460
00:18:01,992 --> 00:18:03,626
Well, you did the right thing.
461
00:18:03,658 --> 00:18:06,014
And speaking on behalf
of your pathetic family,
462
00:18:06,047 --> 00:18:07,029
we thank you.
463
00:18:07,061 --> 00:18:08,467
What's going on?
464
00:18:08,499 --> 00:18:10,365
Here's your damn rent money.
465
00:18:10,396 --> 00:18:11,803
Hey.
466
00:18:11,835 --> 00:18:13,831
How dare you talk
to your grandfather that way.
467
00:18:13,863 --> 00:18:16,218
You pick that up and hand it
to him like a person.
468
00:18:16,252 --> 00:18:17,658
He's not my grandfather.
He's my landlord.
469
00:18:17,689 --> 00:18:19,226
I can say whatever I want.
470
00:18:19,260 --> 00:18:20,340
It's okay. I got it.
471
00:18:20,372 --> 00:18:21,516
No, Dad, don't. Leave it.
472
00:18:21,549 --> 00:18:24,558
She's an ungrateful little brat,
and she should pick it up.
473
00:18:24,590 --> 00:18:26,356
Why? I'm already bailing him out.
474
00:18:26,388 --> 00:18:27,533
He should do something, too.
475
00:18:27,566 --> 00:18:29,398
Harris, pick up the damn check!
476
00:18:29,431 --> 00:18:30,184
Or what?!
477
00:18:30,215 --> 00:18:31,852
Stop it!
478
00:18:31,883 --> 00:18:33,323
Stop it, both of you!
479
00:18:34,794 --> 00:18:37,999
You think I'm not ashamed
that I have to ask you?
480
00:18:38,033 --> 00:18:40,191
I hate that I have to ask you.
481
00:18:40,222 --> 00:18:42,089
No, Dad, you do not need to apologize.
482
00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:43,788
Oh, yes, I do.
483
00:18:43,822 --> 00:18:44,934
I get why you're angry.
484
00:18:44,965 --> 00:18:46,241
I'm angry, too.
485
00:18:46,273 --> 00:18:47,386
You want to know why I'm angry?
486
00:18:47,419 --> 00:18:50,196
'Cause your grandmother told me to
buy life insurance and I didn't.
487
00:18:50,220 --> 00:18:53,043
If I had, I could just throw
my broke ass off the damn roof
488
00:18:53,076 --> 00:18:55,530
and you wouldn't have to
worry about anything!
489
00:19:00,075 --> 00:19:02,234
I...
490
00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:03,772
I'm sorry, Grandpa.
491
00:19:05,799 --> 00:19:08,383
I wanna hug you, but...
492
00:19:08,414 --> 00:19:10,411
I don't want to take the chance
after being in that crowd.
493
00:19:12,372 --> 00:19:13,714
We'll just pretend like you did.
494
00:19:19,272 --> 00:19:21,300
He's just upset.
495
00:19:21,333 --> 00:19:22,576
And don't worry.
496
00:19:22,609 --> 00:19:24,244
With his cholesterol,
497
00:19:24,276 --> 00:19:26,337
no one would have given him
insurance anyway.
498
00:19:26,370 --> 00:19:29,247
♪♪
499
00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:30,655
[Door opens]
500
00:19:32,224 --> 00:19:33,730
Dan?
501
00:19:33,762 --> 00:19:35,234
I'm awake.
502
00:19:36,770 --> 00:19:38,863
[Grunts]
503
00:19:38,896 --> 00:19:40,107
What happened?
504
00:19:40,138 --> 00:19:42,624
I thought you were gonna
spend the night at your place.
505
00:19:42,657 --> 00:19:45,504
Damn you, Dan Conner.
You're just too cuddly.
506
00:19:45,536 --> 00:19:47,072
Mm.
507
00:19:47,105 --> 00:19:49,690
I needed to hear that.
I had a rough day.
508
00:19:49,721 --> 00:19:51,848
Ohh. I'm here now.
509
00:19:51,879 --> 00:19:53,842
You can tell me all about it.
510
00:19:56,327 --> 00:19:58,715
All right, freak show, what's this?
511
00:19:58,748 --> 00:20:01,822
It's a picture of your face
on two pillows
512
00:20:01,856 --> 00:20:03,752
that are supposed to
represent your body,
513
00:20:03,784 --> 00:20:07,218
and they have perfume
and cocoa butter on them
514
00:20:07,250 --> 00:20:08,461
so they'll smell like you.
515
00:20:08,494 --> 00:20:10,621
All perfectly normal.
516
00:20:13,955 --> 00:20:16,899
Stay away from my man!
517
00:20:19,417 --> 00:20:21,773
Gotta tell you, it's kinda hot
when you fight for me.
518
00:20:21,804 --> 00:20:23,080
[Chuckles]
519
00:20:23,112 --> 00:20:24,650
Ohh.
520
00:20:24,684 --> 00:20:25,828
I'll cut a bitch.
521
00:20:25,861 --> 00:20:27,301
♪♪
522
00:20:30,603 --> 00:20:32,173
Hey, Darlene.
523
00:20:32,205 --> 00:20:35,868
I saved you a celebratory glass
of apple cider.
524
00:20:35,901 --> 00:20:39,859
While you were out sunning
yourself on a rock someplace...
525
00:20:39,890 --> 00:20:43,848
we shut down the supervised
drug testing at Wellman.
526
00:20:43,881 --> 00:20:45,615
Robin told me. Good for you.
527
00:20:45,647 --> 00:20:46,758
You're not watching me.
528
00:20:46,790 --> 00:20:48,559
I'm not watching anybody.
529
00:20:48,590 --> 00:20:50,454
I'm just gonna say I am.
530
00:20:50,488 --> 00:20:53,399
Ah. That's a relief.
531
00:20:53,431 --> 00:20:55,786
I just got high with Ben
in the driveway.
532
00:20:57,125 --> 00:20:58,436
[Laughs]
38788
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