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1
00:00:11,511 --> 00:00:12,351
Hey.
2
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:16,893
So, do you think this outfit
will get me this Chief Administrator job?
3
00:00:17,475 --> 00:00:19,055
Are you meeting with a man or a woman?
4
00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:21,942
A man.
5
00:00:22,564 --> 00:00:23,404
[grunts]
6
00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:28,704
Now you'll get it.
7
00:00:29,362 --> 00:00:32,742
Damn. I never thought
I'd get Me Too'd by my own sister.
8
00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:33,664
[chuckles]
9
00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:36,285
Okay. Don't be mad
when some big-titted bitch
10
00:00:36,369 --> 00:00:38,079
is walking around with your job.
11
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:39,163
[laughing]
12
00:00:40,081 --> 00:00:42,001
Stop trying to body shame me.
13
00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:44,593
Shoot. It ain't my fault
you shaped like Daddy.
14
00:00:46,296 --> 00:00:47,586
All right, it's your dream,
15
00:00:47,672 --> 00:00:50,182
I'm just trying to
get you to the mountaintop.
16
00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:52,638
[scoffs] Well, I don't need
all that, all right?
17
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,309
I have 20 years' experience.
18
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:57,849
This job is in the bag.
19
00:00:57,932 --> 00:01:01,562
And when I get it,
I'mma march right into my boss' office
20
00:01:01,644 --> 00:01:03,694
and quit right in her face.
21
00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:06,522
Bump that.
You should take a dump on her desk.
22
00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:10,031
She'll get the message.
23
00:01:11,863 --> 00:01:13,743
What kind of psycho does that?
24
00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,163
Nobody I know.
25
00:01:18,411 --> 00:01:22,871
Now see,
I was thinking I would show up late.
26
00:01:22,957 --> 00:01:25,377
Maybe wear jeans.
27
00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:28,920
We quit different.
28
00:01:30,590 --> 00:01:31,630
Whatever. Do you.
29
00:01:31,716 --> 00:01:36,136
Point is, you're moving on,
moving up. No more roadblocks.
30
00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:39,223
Hey. Now that I got my coffee,
31
00:01:39,307 --> 00:01:41,477
you want to throw in
a little quickie before work?
32
00:01:41,976 --> 00:01:42,846
Mmm.
33
00:01:42,936 --> 00:01:44,596
I forgot about that dead end.
34
00:01:47,857 --> 00:01:50,817
No, baby, I can't.
I have my interview at St. Vincent's.
35
00:01:50,902 --> 00:01:54,322
Yeah, baby, that's today?
Ooh, go ahead on, Mrs. Upshaw.
36
00:01:54,405 --> 00:01:55,985
Baby, you gon' get that job.
37
00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:57,124
Ooh. Mmm.
38
00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:58,870
I know that's right.
39
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:02,662
It ain't nothing more sexy
than a woman gettin' a big-ass paycheck.
40
00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:03,917
[chuckles]
41
00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:09,091
Oh, pump me up, Daddy.
Pump me up! [laughing]
42
00:02:09,170 --> 00:02:10,670
Ooh, I hate when you like him.
43
00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:14,879
Quit hatin', Can't Run-DMC.
44
00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:16,678
[Regina] All right. [clears throat]
45
00:02:16,761 --> 00:02:20,311
Hey, what happened to
supporting me, okay? Focus up, people.
46
00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:22,930
-Focus up.
-I'mma do a little bit more supportin',
47
00:02:23,017 --> 00:02:25,687
when I pick up
that bottle of Cook's champagne.
48
00:02:25,770 --> 00:02:26,730
Ooh.
49
00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:30,725
Yeah, nothing says
"I love you" like gas-station bubbly.
50
00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:34,147
We can't toast tonight, okay?
51
00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:36,357
You've got poker and I've got trivia.
52
00:02:36,447 --> 00:02:38,237
And I have your kids.
53
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:40,235
Tonight we gonna go on Facebook
54
00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,826
and I'm gonna show them
the kinda life they could've had
55
00:02:42,912 --> 00:02:44,962
if their mama had married Dante.
56
00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:48,536
He's a doctor now.
57
00:02:48,626 --> 00:02:50,206
He met Obama.
58
00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:55,425
Why don't you take the kids
down to the animal shelter
59
00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:59,548
and show them the life you coulda had
if you hadn't chewed through that cage?
60
00:03:00,388 --> 00:03:02,308
-Come on, I'm ready for you.
-Come on!
61
00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:04,181
All right, no, no, no.
62
00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:07,977
All right, all right, all right!
63
00:03:08,062 --> 00:03:09,362
That's enough now.
64
00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:11,019
Now, Lucretia…
65
00:03:12,108 --> 00:03:14,108
you deserved that one. [chuckles softly]
66
00:03:14,944 --> 00:03:17,204
And, husband, you stay in the light.
67
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:18,990
I'll see you tonight after trivia.
68
00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:21,533
All right,
enjoy your nerd night, all right?
69
00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:24,754
I told you not to call it that.
70
00:03:24,829 --> 00:03:26,159
[hesitating] You is right.
71
00:03:26,247 --> 00:03:29,787
I mean, it's a bunch of smart people
takin' tests for fun.
72
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,836
Ain't nothing nerdy about that.
73
00:03:33,421 --> 00:03:34,511
Sis, back me up.
74
00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:37,934
I tell people you're at AA.
75
00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:44,598
[vocalizing]
76
00:03:44,682 --> 00:03:45,892
♪ Solid as a rock ♪
77
00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:47,767
[vocalizing]
78
00:03:47,852 --> 00:03:50,732
♪ Solid ♪
79
00:03:50,813 --> 00:03:52,983
I know it sounds like a cliché,
80
00:03:53,066 --> 00:03:57,356
but I truly am committed
to maximizing efficiencies in health care
81
00:03:57,445 --> 00:03:59,855
without compromising patient care.
82
00:04:00,531 --> 00:04:03,371
And I make cupcakes for birthdays.
83
00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:07,291
Regina Upshaw, you are a find.
84
00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:09,832
Hearing your passion
for the work is wonderful.
85
00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:12,206
-I'd love to hire you, but--
-Ah, thank you.
86
00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:13,803
Thank you, thank you!
87
00:04:13,878 --> 00:04:15,708
Uh, you didn't let me finish, uh…
88
00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:18,469
-Sadly--
-No, no, don't say "sadly."
89
00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:21,760
-Unfortunately--
-Oh, that's a bougie "sadly."
90
00:04:23,179 --> 00:04:26,519
Without an MBA, we can only hire you
at the position you currently hold.
91
00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:29,734
A master's degree
is really that important?
92
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,360
People don't go to grad school
because they enjoy student loans.
93
00:04:37,610 --> 00:04:40,070
So my 20 years' experience
94
00:04:40,154 --> 00:04:43,074
means nothing compared to an MBA?
95
00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:45,118
Basically. Look,
96
00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:49,791
what I can do is offer you
your current position at this salary.
97
00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:54,286
I make more than that
in the position I currently hold.
98
00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:56,047
Then what are you doin' here?
99
00:04:57,171 --> 00:04:59,511
Tryin' to better myself, asshole.
100
00:05:01,259 --> 00:05:03,509
So on your résumé
where it says "good under pressure"?
101
00:05:03,594 --> 00:05:05,974
You're not dangling
out that window, are you?
102
00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:16,024
Hey, yo, Bennie.
I got your champagne for Regina.
103
00:05:16,607 --> 00:05:18,607
Damn, Duck, that ain't Cook's.
104
00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:21,823
I ain't trying to spend
all of Regina's new-job money.
105
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:26,202
She's a good woman, man.
She deserves… better.
106
00:05:27,785 --> 00:05:29,325
I got her a card, too.
107
00:05:29,412 --> 00:05:31,502
I left a little room
on the bottom for you.
108
00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:34,209
You're welcome.
109
00:05:36,210 --> 00:05:37,210
Yeah.
110
00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:39,295
Uh, hey, Bennie, what's tonight's buy-in?
111
00:05:39,380 --> 00:05:41,420
Tony, you ask me that shit every week.
112
00:05:41,507 --> 00:05:44,427
I told you it's $20 cash,
and I ain't taking no scratch-offs.
113
00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:46,720
Well, okay. [snorts]
114
00:05:47,305 --> 00:05:48,675
Hey, baby. Yeah, um…
115
00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:54,016
[hesitating] He said it's, um, $20,
so can I play?
116
00:05:55,938 --> 00:05:58,438
Okay, thank you. Hey, baby, I lo… Oh, she…
117
00:05:58,524 --> 00:05:59,444
Okay.
118
00:06:00,109 --> 00:06:03,399
[scoffs] Yeah, hah! That's right.
That's all your asses tonight.
119
00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:04,818
Shit, I'm the man!
120
00:06:06,949 --> 00:06:07,909
[sighs]
121
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:12,413
Here. You still ordering shit?
I thought you said you was done.
122
00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:13,617
I said that?
123
00:06:14,415 --> 00:06:16,665
Yeah, I be saying stuff, yeah.
124
00:06:17,251 --> 00:06:20,591
Besides, poker game's tonight.
Bring the cash and you good.
125
00:06:20,671 --> 00:06:24,091
Can't. Wouldn't,
but also can't. I got a date.
126
00:06:24,675 --> 00:06:27,135
A date? Boy, what's her Instagram?
127
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:29,760
Pull her up, lemme see
what a young player's working with.
128
00:06:29,847 --> 00:06:30,927
What's her name?
129
00:06:31,015 --> 00:06:33,265
Old people shouldn't be on social media.
130
00:06:34,310 --> 00:06:37,190
No, a grown man shouldn't be
wearing booty shorts to work…
131
00:06:38,981 --> 00:06:42,151
but you walking around
dressed like a half-wrapped Tootsie Roll.
132
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:46,275
Let me see the girl.
How long you been seeing her?
133
00:06:46,364 --> 00:06:48,574
Are you trying to
tiptoe into a father moment?
134
00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:51,448
No. You know,
your mama's worried about you.
135
00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:53,868
She don't want you running through women.
136
00:06:53,955 --> 00:06:56,035
Oh, she don't want me
to turn out like you, huh?
137
00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,344
Yeah, basically.
138
00:07:02,296 --> 00:07:05,546
Inspection time! Hands up, receipts out.
139
00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:08,715
Why you act like we criminals?
140
00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:10,103
Who's actin'?
141
00:07:11,347 --> 00:07:13,767
That's why I don't fool with family.
Cold. I don't know.
142
00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:15,600
Auntie, we got a tenant situation.
143
00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,805
-Did Miss Adelman finally die?
-[scoffs] Nope.
144
00:07:17,895 --> 00:07:20,225
She's still
hanging on to that rent control.
145
00:07:20,982 --> 00:07:23,572
Well, you're
my building manager, so fix it.
146
00:07:23,651 --> 00:07:25,781
Come on, Bennie, hurry up. I gotta go.
147
00:07:25,862 --> 00:07:27,702
It's the guy from 3B, Ernest.
148
00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:30,070
Still? I thought you were handling him.
149
00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:32,158
I keep putting
eviction notices on his door,
150
00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:34,373
he turns around, puts 'em back on mine.
151
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:37,668
It's embarrassing
when I'm trying to bring a date home.
152
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:40,841
Aww, boo-hoo, nephew.
153
00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:43,552
But look, I'm just hearing problems.
154
00:07:43,629 --> 00:07:46,049
We gotta get a real estate lawyer
and take him to court.
155
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,382
Not with my money.
156
00:07:49,510 --> 00:07:51,800
-[sighs] I'll get him out.
-How?
157
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:53,468
The less you know, the better.
158
00:07:54,182 --> 00:07:56,272
But look, watch the girls for me tonight.
159
00:07:56,350 --> 00:07:59,100
For some reason, after a teen pregnancy,
160
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:00,397
a second mortgage,
161
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,940
a break baby, and a third mortgage,
162
00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:05,534
your parents still feel
they deserve a night out.
163
00:08:07,111 --> 00:08:09,491
Anything you need, Auntie.
I'll cancel my plans.
164
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:13,700
Hey, man, what about the date?
You can't cancel for me?
165
00:08:13,784 --> 00:08:14,874
No.
166
00:08:16,871 --> 00:08:17,911
See, I blame you.
167
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:20,208
Yeah, I blame you.
168
00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:22,211
You raised him to turn on me.
169
00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:24,713
I raised him to kill you in your sleep.
170
00:08:25,796 --> 00:08:27,296
And I'm still waitin'.
171
00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:36,179
-Damn it!
-[chuckles]
172
00:08:36,265 --> 00:08:38,095
That is my third tequila shot
173
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:40,354
and I'm still
thinking about that damn job.
174
00:08:40,436 --> 00:08:42,856
Three? Those limes are slowing you down.
175
00:08:45,691 --> 00:08:46,821
Uh-uh, all right?
176
00:08:46,901 --> 00:08:49,361
You save
some brain cells for trivia, please.
177
00:08:49,445 --> 00:08:51,445
I don't wanna be a loser here, too.
178
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,781
[scoffs] I'm a nurse,
I know how much I can handle.
179
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:56,076
The more you whine,
the more I have to drink.
180
00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,410
Oh, wine. Should I switch to wine?
181
00:08:58,496 --> 00:08:59,906
[chuckles]
182
00:08:59,997 --> 00:09:02,787
No, you're right. You're right.
Okay, I will let it go.
183
00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:05,246
It's just so unfair.
184
00:09:06,045 --> 00:09:09,755
Oh, that Chief Administrator job
was supposed to be mine.
185
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,800
Now I'm stuck
at Mercy General with dumb Sheila.
186
00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:16,425
If the only thing that's holding you back
is an MBA, go get one. [chuckles]
187
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:18,563
Tuck in your privilege.
188
00:09:19,433 --> 00:09:22,313
That's that white girl
cat calendar shit talking.
189
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,145
"Believe it, achieve it!"
190
00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:25,900
"No day like today!"
191
00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:27,322
You got me that calendar.
192
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:32,702
You know,
if dumb Sheila can do it, so can I.
193
00:09:32,780 --> 00:09:34,910
You are way better than dumb Sheila.
194
00:09:34,991 --> 00:09:36,371
Oh, uh-uh. See, wait a minute.
195
00:09:36,450 --> 00:09:38,490
You probably
shouldn't call her dumb Sheila.
196
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:40,038
It sounds racist when you say it.
197
00:09:43,207 --> 00:09:45,377
Okay, let's try this again.
198
00:09:45,459 --> 00:09:48,299
Kelvin Upshaw, are you
related to that Aaliyah girl?
199
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:49,839
No, I am not.
200
00:09:49,922 --> 00:09:52,052
But you look a lot
like her dead boyfriend.
201
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:54,263
Not all Black people look alike.
202
00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:56,761
Good, good.
203
00:09:56,846 --> 00:09:59,176
Look, this is a two-way street.
204
00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:01,015
I'll pretend not to know you,
205
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,190
but you gotta put me on with the hotties.
206
00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:06,609
I can point you to their lunch table.
207
00:10:08,399 --> 00:10:09,479
I thought you were popular.
208
00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:11,567
It's a process. I'm coming up.
209
00:10:13,195 --> 00:10:14,855
Kelvin, you staying for dinner?
210
00:10:15,489 --> 00:10:16,409
That depends.
211
00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:18,240
You makin' them fake greens again?
212
00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:20,326
If you mean kale, I sure am.
213
00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:23,041
Well, if you mean kale,
I'm sure not. Peace.
214
00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:27,213
Make sure you practice
your lines, 'cause we gotta sell it.
215
00:10:30,087 --> 00:10:31,707
Did Kelvin just leave?
216
00:10:31,797 --> 00:10:34,257
I needed help with my family tree project.
217
00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:35,382
I'll help you.
218
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,798
I needed to ask Kelvin
how he fits into the family.
219
00:10:40,222 --> 00:10:41,222
Bernard will help you.
220
00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:44,311
[chuckles nervously]
221
00:10:44,393 --> 00:10:47,103
What do you mean,
"How he fits into the family"?
222
00:10:47,188 --> 00:10:49,358
Well, I thought he was like a cousin,
223
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:51,980
but then Aaliyah said
that he was her boyfriend,
224
00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:53,818
but then he wasn't her boyfriend.
225
00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:55,532
Now I'm confused.
226
00:10:56,530 --> 00:10:58,620
Nobody explained this mess to her?
227
00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:02,582
What you looking
at me for? I'm not the adult.
228
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:06,616
Uh, well, Maya, you see, um…
[clears throat]
229
00:11:07,416 --> 00:11:08,786
before you were born…
230
00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:11,554
Aaliyah?
231
00:11:13,255 --> 00:11:14,585
Seriously?
232
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:17,014
How do you pick up packages with no spine?
233
00:11:22,306 --> 00:11:25,726
Ernest! Open up. It's Ms. Turner,
the woman you owe rent to.
234
00:11:27,269 --> 00:11:31,269
I know you not in there playin' Tony Hawk
scratchin' up my living room floors.
235
00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:33,944
Technically, Tony Hawk's a skateboarder.
236
00:11:35,152 --> 00:11:37,912
Look, you've been
ignoring eviction notices,
237
00:11:37,988 --> 00:11:40,368
so I'm gonna need you
to pack up your stuff
238
00:11:40,449 --> 00:11:43,369
and see your way
to the nearest skate park, Shaun White.
239
00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:44,582
Snowboarder.
240
00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:48,705
-Just get the hell out, fool.
-Squatter's rights.
241
00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:50,581
You never
presented me with a written lease,
242
00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:52,918
so according to Article 31
of Indiana state code,
243
00:11:53,003 --> 00:11:54,173
get outta my face.
244
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:58,841
Well, I'd like to
present to you article one and two.
245
00:11:58,926 --> 00:12:01,176
Ah, the threats begin.
246
00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:03,602
I'll just be filmin'
the remainder of this interaction
247
00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:05,561
in case I ever have to show it to a jury.
248
00:12:05,641 --> 00:12:06,771
What do you have to say to that?
249
00:12:06,851 --> 00:12:09,311
I wonder if that phone
will fit down your throat.
250
00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:13,023
Not a threat, it's for science.
251
00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:21,243
Ah! Sixes over nines, thank you very much.
252
00:12:21,323 --> 00:12:22,583
Hell no.
253
00:12:22,658 --> 00:12:25,578
-Come on, he's cheatin', man.
-Yeah.
254
00:12:25,661 --> 00:12:26,501
Oh, man.
255
00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:29,329
You one of
the most blessed convicts I ever seen.
256
00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:33,495
Yeah. The Lord
is my shepherd, he shall not want
257
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,876
-me to lose a hand. Put up!
-[grunts]
258
00:12:35,963 --> 00:12:37,093
[laughing]
259
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:39,803
Duck, drop what you're doing,
I need you right now.
260
00:12:39,884 --> 00:12:41,644
Duck, don't do it.
261
00:12:41,719 --> 00:12:44,759
With that kinda money right there,
you can get a woman with less mileage.
262
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,597
[laughing]
263
00:12:50,978 --> 00:12:52,858
-Bennie's got a pair of twos.
-What the…
264
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:58,114
I have a tenant who's having trouble
paying rent. I need your help.
265
00:12:58,194 --> 00:12:59,534
To do what? Thugging?
266
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:01,862
I already told you, I'm a man of God now.
267
00:13:01,947 --> 00:13:03,447
Uh, bring God.
268
00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:06,695
I have something
totally different in mind.
269
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:08,156
All right, give me a second.
270
00:13:08,245 --> 00:13:10,245
You bring the Son and the Holy Ghost.
271
00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:14,630
Won't He do it? Uh-oh.
272
00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:16,550
[laughs]
273
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:18,259
Shit, could He do it for me?
274
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:25,599
Now that the Right Reverend is gone,
I might have a shot. Lemme deal.
275
00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:29,979
Uh, you know what?
Mom's been down for two hours now.
276
00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:31,849
I should probably go turn her.
277
00:13:32,686 --> 00:13:34,476
Yeah, maybe we should call it, man.
278
00:13:34,980 --> 00:13:37,360
Come on, man.
Y'all scared I'm gonna take y'all money?
279
00:13:37,441 --> 00:13:40,031
Regina's gone to trivia, let's play.
280
00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:43,240
Oh. You know what? We should stay.
281
00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:45,452
He did say
Regina went out for that new job.
282
00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:47,453
-Yeah, and he's probably hurtin'.
-Yeah.
283
00:13:47,535 --> 00:13:49,445
-Yeah.
-What y'all talking about?
284
00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:51,327
Your lady's lookin'
for an upgrade, player.
285
00:13:51,413 --> 00:13:52,463
-[chuckles]
-Mmm-hmm.
286
00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:54,250
Are you talking about her phone?
287
00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:56,714
No. We thought you knew.
288
00:13:56,794 --> 00:13:59,054
It's what always happens
when a Black woman comes up.
289
00:13:59,129 --> 00:14:02,339
New job, more money, yoga.
290
00:14:03,467 --> 00:14:04,967
Then they marry a white boy.
291
00:14:05,928 --> 00:14:07,468
That's how I lost my lady.
292
00:14:07,555 --> 00:14:10,925
-Huh?
-Look, I didn't always live with my mama.
293
00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:14,810
Y'all ain't talking about me and my wife.
294
00:14:14,895 --> 00:14:17,815
No, that's everybody.
Couples have to be on the same level.
295
00:14:17,898 --> 00:14:20,898
The problem is,
you married "Tryin' Regina."
296
00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:23,775
Now you married "Made It Regina." Yeah?
297
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,913
She's lookin'
for a much better class of man.
298
00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:28,030
Ah, yeah? Where's she gonna meet him at?
299
00:14:28,117 --> 00:14:31,447
Oh, I don't know.
Possibly her weekly trivia night.
300
00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:36,207
You mean that place chock-full of smart,
good-looking white boys and liquor?
301
00:14:36,292 --> 00:14:37,632
[fake gasps]
302
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,630
-No!
-No!
303
00:14:40,296 --> 00:14:42,086
What are you talking about?
304
00:14:42,172 --> 00:14:44,592
Your mama is the only woman that you know.
305
00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:48,637
And, Tony, you whipped like butter.
306
00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:51,639
Hey, man, I am not.
307
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:54,808
You know, sometimes
love is a one-way street.
308
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:57,311
He's just lashin' out.
309
00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:58,806
Who are you talkin' to, man?
310
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,568
I got my woman on lock. [scoffs]
311
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,650
-Hey, I'mma text her right now.
-Okay.
312
00:15:04,153 --> 00:15:05,403
Yeah. "Baby…"
313
00:15:06,530 --> 00:15:07,660
"I'm thinking of you."
314
00:15:08,991 --> 00:15:11,371
Yeah. Send.
315
00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:13,001
[both chuckle]
316
00:15:13,078 --> 00:15:16,248
-Poor guy. He ain't even drunk.
-[both laughing]
317
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,077
Shut up, fool.
318
00:15:20,628 --> 00:15:22,708
-Look, there's bubbles right there.
-Where?
319
00:15:22,796 --> 00:15:24,546
Bubbles, man. [laughs]
320
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:27,260
[cell phone chiming]
321
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:28,640
"K."
322
00:15:32,264 --> 00:15:34,104
Damn, she ain't say nothing but "K"?
323
00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:36,306
Damn.
324
00:15:36,977 --> 00:15:39,017
She didn't even put the O in front of it.
325
00:15:40,314 --> 00:15:42,074
The O is right above the K.
326
00:15:45,069 --> 00:15:49,819
All right, and our
last question from round one was,
327
00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:54,657
"Which of
Henry VIII's ships sank in 1545?"
328
00:15:54,745 --> 00:15:56,655
Only one team got it right.
329
00:15:56,747 --> 00:16:00,827
The Mary Rose, bitches! [laughing]
330
00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:01,958
English Channel!
331
00:16:02,044 --> 00:16:03,344
Damn, you are killing it!
332
00:16:03,420 --> 00:16:05,550
Don't ever doubt me, Amy.
333
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:09,221
Wreckage was found in 1982,
but he ain't asked me that.
334
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,100
Here's to trivia night.
335
00:16:12,179 --> 00:16:13,929
Ooh, I needed this!
336
00:16:14,473 --> 00:16:17,353
No kids, no work, no husband,
337
00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:19,984
just me, doin' me.
338
00:16:20,062 --> 00:16:21,982
-It's Regina's world!
-Whoo!
339
00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:25,943
All these white men in here.
340
00:16:27,861 --> 00:16:29,151
Davis was right.
341
00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:31,028
And Davis ain't never right.
342
00:16:31,615 --> 00:16:32,565
Regina.
343
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:34,538
What the hell are you doin' here?
344
00:16:34,618 --> 00:16:36,538
Why you don't want me here?
345
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:37,910
Are you hiding something?
346
00:16:39,039 --> 00:16:40,499
I'm Bennie, by the way.
347
00:16:40,582 --> 00:16:42,212
Regina's forever husband.
348
00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:44,420
We've met. You were at my wedding.
349
00:16:44,503 --> 00:16:46,553
You got drunk and fought the DJ.
[chuckles nervously]
350
00:16:47,631 --> 00:16:49,801
You could be one of four people right now.
351
00:16:49,883 --> 00:16:51,053
Sorry 'bout that.
352
00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:55,314
Okay, let's get round two going!
353
00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:56,769
-Let's go.
-Here we go.
354
00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,479
Thanks for stopping by. Bye.
355
00:16:58,559 --> 00:16:59,729
I'm here for you.
356
00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:02,230
To be with you and to never leave you.
357
00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:05,323
Let's trivia! Let's go, trivia!
358
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:08,279
Iowa! Caesar! Gettyburg!
359
00:17:09,361 --> 00:17:11,321
They gotta ask questions first.
360
00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:12,775
Oh, no… I know.
361
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:15,365
Look, I'm trying
to learn the rules, too. Okay?
362
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:17,831
I'm at your level. Come on with it, baby!
363
00:17:17,911 --> 00:17:21,961
First question. What is the value… of pi?
364
00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:24,501
Uh, Safeway or Kroger?
365
00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:25,745
[all laughing]
366
00:17:27,546 --> 00:17:30,126
Hey, it's a math question.
367
00:17:30,215 --> 00:17:32,125
Yeah, if it's math, Kroger's cheaper.
368
00:17:32,217 --> 00:17:35,047
Okay, that's one point for us.
What's our team name?
369
00:17:35,637 --> 00:17:37,257
Don't tell him. Don't you tell him.
370
00:17:37,347 --> 00:17:38,597
The Re-Amy-Mators.
371
00:17:38,682 --> 00:17:40,482
Uh, hell, no. That ain't…
372
00:17:40,559 --> 00:17:42,729
Uh, hey, Harry Potter. Check this out.
373
00:17:43,395 --> 00:17:45,055
We changing our name, all right?
374
00:17:45,147 --> 00:17:49,317
Uh, we are now Earth, Wind
and… [hesitating] Amy. Yeah.
375
00:17:49,818 --> 00:17:52,608
-'Cause I'm fire, right?
-Yeah! [laughing]
376
00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:56,703
[trivia announcer chuckling]
Okay, next question.
377
00:17:57,493 --> 00:18:00,203
Which REO Speedwagon album
378
00:18:00,287 --> 00:18:03,287
contained four US Top 40 hits?
379
00:18:03,373 --> 00:18:05,083
No, babe, that's for Amy. Okay?
380
00:18:05,167 --> 00:18:07,537
Put your pen down. You know this?
381
00:18:07,628 --> 00:18:09,128
Yes. Shut up.
382
00:18:09,213 --> 00:18:11,423
Well, how you know Oreo Fastwagon?
383
00:18:12,174 --> 00:18:13,884
I need to check your presets.
384
00:18:14,384 --> 00:18:15,554
I need for you to go.
385
00:18:16,386 --> 00:18:18,006
[trivia announcer] Question three.
386
00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:19,427
Which Dixie Chick is--
387
00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:20,805
No, no. Come on, man.
388
00:18:20,891 --> 00:18:22,981
You gotta ask a question
we can all understand.
389
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:24,390
Let's keep it fair,
390
00:18:24,478 --> 00:18:27,058
it's Black people in here, too,
besides us.
391
00:18:27,147 --> 00:18:30,817
And the curly-haired dude in the back
that's trying to pass. What up, bro?
392
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:36,121
Okay, I got one right here.
Here it is, right here.
393
00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:37,868
Did OJ do it?
394
00:18:39,159 --> 00:18:40,659
It's tricky, be careful.
395
00:18:42,204 --> 00:18:44,504
Baby, tell 'em
where you think the glove is.
396
00:18:46,208 --> 00:18:47,168
Baby?
397
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:50,378
Regina? Regina?
398
00:18:53,465 --> 00:18:55,925
Mmm. That was so good.
399
00:18:57,302 --> 00:18:58,602
It was, huh?
400
00:18:58,679 --> 00:19:00,679
Are you ready for bed now, sweetie?
401
00:19:00,764 --> 00:19:03,934
Mmm-hmm.
As soon as y'all tell me about Kelvin.
402
00:19:05,811 --> 00:19:07,231
I told you this wouldn't work.
403
00:19:07,855 --> 00:19:10,935
Uh, Maya, why don't you go upstairs,
404
00:19:11,024 --> 00:19:12,904
put your PJs on, brush your teeth
405
00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:15,355
and if you're still awake
when we come up there,
406
00:19:15,445 --> 00:19:18,155
then we'll tell you something.
407
00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:21,201
I had three bowls of ice cream.
408
00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:23,245
I'll be awake forever.
409
00:19:25,038 --> 00:19:28,288
Great. Now she's all sugared up
and still asking questions.
410
00:19:28,375 --> 00:19:29,495
What are we gonna do now?
411
00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:33,755
I say we tell her the truth.
May as well learn young that Bennie sucks.
412
00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:37,129
No, you just want to ruin him for her
so she'll hate him as much as you do.
413
00:19:37,217 --> 00:19:38,677
Cool, so we have a game plan.
414
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:41,970
-Maya--
-No, Bernard, you're being an ass.
415
00:19:42,055 --> 00:19:44,345
I remember when
I found out I was a ghetto twin.
416
00:19:45,142 --> 00:19:47,352
I mean, it really sucked.
417
00:19:47,436 --> 00:19:49,016
Do you wanna hurt Maya like that?
418
00:19:49,605 --> 00:19:52,015
All right. You're right. Bennie's Bennie.
419
00:19:52,107 --> 00:19:54,277
He doesn't need our help
to make him look bad.
420
00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:56,569
[Maya] Teeth are done. Who is he?
421
00:19:58,530 --> 00:20:00,120
So, we're on the same page?
422
00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:02,279
Distract her by telling her
she's getting a puppy?
423
00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:03,407
It's worth a shot.
424
00:20:07,331 --> 00:20:09,211
Really nice of you
giving me a place to stay.
425
00:20:09,291 --> 00:20:11,751
Oh, of course.
We have to take care of our own.
426
00:20:11,835 --> 00:20:14,455
Now, you sure you're okay
with having a roommate?
427
00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:16,216
Hey, I just got out of prison.
428
00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:19,008
Long as he stay on his side
during lights out, we good.
429
00:20:20,010 --> 00:20:21,930
You'll like him. He's a Christian.
430
00:20:22,012 --> 00:20:24,352
Y'all can swap
some of that fire and brimstone.
431
00:20:25,349 --> 00:20:28,349
[hesitates] And make sure
you tell him about prison, too.
432
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:32,611
He's real curious
about the grisly down-and-dirty parts.
433
00:20:35,692 --> 00:20:38,322
Ernest! It's Ms. Turner.
434
00:20:40,989 --> 00:20:42,529
What the hell you want now?
435
00:20:42,616 --> 00:20:45,286
Oh, I just want you
to meet your new roommate.
436
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:48,705
You can't give me a roommate.
437
00:20:49,289 --> 00:20:51,419
Well, where does it say that in our lease?
438
00:20:52,042 --> 00:20:55,552
Oh, yeah, that's right.
As you pointed out, we never did a lease.
439
00:20:56,838 --> 00:20:59,088
But your new roomie's got one.
440
00:21:00,175 --> 00:21:02,505
Enjoy fighting over that one bedroom.
441
00:21:04,179 --> 00:21:05,719
Nice to meet you, brother.
442
00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:07,386
You been baptized?
443
00:21:07,975 --> 00:21:08,885
No. [chuckles nervously]
444
00:21:10,143 --> 00:21:11,063
Why?
445
00:21:12,312 --> 00:21:14,652
I'll go clean out the tub,
we can do that now.
446
00:21:18,068 --> 00:21:20,648
It's in your hands now, Jesus. Mmm.
447
00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:25,450
Three, two, one.
448
00:21:25,993 --> 00:21:27,413
You can have the damn place!
449
00:21:27,494 --> 00:21:29,164
Just throw my shit out front.
450
00:21:29,246 --> 00:21:30,406
What you running for?
451
00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:32,497
I was just about to lay hands on you.
452
00:21:33,583 --> 00:21:35,923
Huh. I guess
the apartment's all mine, then.
453
00:21:36,003 --> 00:21:37,963
Yeah, as long as you pay rent.
454
00:21:38,046 --> 00:21:39,586
You gonna redo my floors?
455
00:21:40,716 --> 00:21:42,176
That ain't in your lease.
456
00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:56,899
Damn, your Uber driver was
driving like you was trying to shake me.
457
00:21:58,191 --> 00:22:00,531
Why, Bennie? Huh? Why?
458
00:22:01,028 --> 00:22:06,278
I have been to a bunch of trivia nights
and you ain't never tripped before.
459
00:22:06,867 --> 00:22:08,657
'Cause, baby, well…
460
00:22:08,744 --> 00:22:11,254
Listen, baby. The guys, they said--
461
00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:12,250
[Regina babbling]
462
00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:14,751
Right there. "The guys."
463
00:22:14,833 --> 00:22:16,173
Hmm? "They said"?
464
00:22:16,251 --> 00:22:18,751
What did they say, Bennie, huh?
465
00:22:18,837 --> 00:22:22,297
-"Eff up Regina's one night to herself"?
-No.
466
00:22:22,883 --> 00:22:25,393
They said you'd leave me for a white guy.
467
00:22:25,469 --> 00:22:27,969
Okay? And it stuck in my head.
468
00:22:28,055 --> 00:22:29,385
The dude's name is Tucker.
469
00:22:30,557 --> 00:22:32,977
And he do his hair like this all the time.
470
00:22:33,060 --> 00:22:35,770
And he dance like that,
you know what I mean?
471
00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:41,439
And y'all was gonna have mixed kids
that look like Kanye West's children.
472
00:22:42,569 --> 00:22:43,899
What are you talking about?
473
00:22:43,987 --> 00:22:45,527
I'm talking about losing you.
474
00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:48,414
Losing me?
Look, what am I, a pair of keys?
475
00:22:49,117 --> 00:22:52,367
And I know for damn sure
that you are not taking marriage advice
476
00:22:52,454 --> 00:22:55,544
from them
no-wife-having clowns down at your shop!
477
00:22:56,166 --> 00:23:00,496
Yeah, you up here talking about
a new you, a new job, big changes.
478
00:23:01,463 --> 00:23:03,763
And I'm afraid that I'd be one of 'em.
479
00:23:04,883 --> 00:23:08,513
Do you turn the cars off
when you tune them?
480
00:23:11,264 --> 00:23:14,234
-We've been together since high school.
-Yeah.
481
00:23:14,309 --> 00:23:17,479
Did you really think
that a 10% bump in pay
482
00:23:17,562 --> 00:23:19,442
was gonna make me start acting brand-new?
483
00:23:19,523 --> 00:23:20,613
[mumbling]
484
00:23:21,233 --> 00:23:23,073
Not that it matters.
485
00:23:23,151 --> 00:23:24,741
I didn't even get the damn job.
486
00:23:26,071 --> 00:23:29,491
Oh, we cool, then. We fine. Yeah. Phew!
487
00:23:33,954 --> 00:23:35,254
We not "cool."
488
00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:37,461
We not "fine."
489
00:23:38,667 --> 00:23:41,247
I'm not fine, so we not fine.
490
00:23:43,463 --> 00:23:46,473
-Girl, look, I'm just--
-[babbling]
491
00:23:46,550 --> 00:23:50,350
The next shit that come out
your mouth better sound something like,
492
00:23:51,471 --> 00:23:53,601
"I'm sorry, Regina."
493
00:23:53,682 --> 00:23:55,642
"You'll get it next time, Regina."
494
00:23:55,725 --> 00:23:56,765
Shit…
495
00:23:57,352 --> 00:23:59,152
"I believe in you, Regina."
496
00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:04,574
That's what I meant
when I said we was fine.
497
00:24:07,821 --> 00:24:10,491
-This mother…
-What the… Ah!
498
00:24:11,992 --> 00:24:14,412
Babe, you know I'm not good with words.
499
00:24:15,704 --> 00:24:18,334
All I know is I lucked up when I got you.
500
00:24:19,124 --> 00:24:22,384
Yeah, you did. You damn sure did.
501
00:24:22,461 --> 00:24:23,751
[scoffs] Boy…
502
00:24:23,837 --> 00:24:27,217
But you got me. We together.
503
00:24:28,550 --> 00:24:30,840
Any move I make, I make with you.
504
00:24:33,805 --> 00:24:37,635
Yeah. Forget that punk-ass job.
You'll find something better, babe.
505
00:24:37,726 --> 00:24:39,186
Yeah, forget that job.
506
00:24:40,353 --> 00:24:42,693
-Look at you learning.
-[chuckles] Yeah.
507
00:24:43,857 --> 00:24:47,647
But no, I won't. Not without a damn MBA.
508
00:24:48,278 --> 00:24:50,278
You know what? We gonna get one.
509
00:24:50,363 --> 00:24:53,913
Matter of fact, I got a partner who got
two in the backyard sitting on bricks.
510
00:24:53,992 --> 00:24:55,952
-[laughing]
-Okay?
511
00:24:56,036 --> 00:24:58,286
-Sitting next to a Cadillac and a--
-Oh. Stop it.
512
00:24:59,623 --> 00:25:01,463
You know it's a degree.
513
00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:04,997
It means I'd have to,
ugh, go back to school.
514
00:25:05,086 --> 00:25:08,836
Yeah. Well, you can do
what you got to do. You…
515
00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:10,594
-It's not just me.
-Yeah.
516
00:25:10,675 --> 00:25:13,595
-That shit costs time and money.
-Yeah, I know.
517
00:25:14,804 --> 00:25:16,774
We'd have to make a lot of adjustments.
518
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:20,390
Well, let's make the adjustments.
519
00:25:21,770 --> 00:25:24,310
I'm rolling with you
till the wheels fall off.
520
00:25:29,653 --> 00:25:31,073
Mommy, Mommy!
521
00:25:31,571 --> 00:25:33,411
Maya, what are you doing up?
522
00:25:33,490 --> 00:25:36,830
I had three bowls of ice cream,
finished my family tree project,
523
00:25:36,910 --> 00:25:39,290
and put together a 1,000-piece puzzle.
524
00:25:39,371 --> 00:25:40,621
She did that puzzle quick.
525
00:25:40,705 --> 00:25:43,455
I would have her tested.
We could be sitting on something.
526
00:25:44,459 --> 00:25:45,789
Let me see this.
527
00:25:45,877 --> 00:25:49,167
Oh, my goodness, baby, this is wonderful.
528
00:25:49,256 --> 00:25:51,466
It is. And she put Kelvin on it.
529
00:25:51,550 --> 00:25:54,220
Oh, yeah. I know all about Kelvin now.
530
00:25:55,470 --> 00:25:57,390
We… we really never told her?
531
00:25:57,472 --> 00:25:59,352
No. No, you did not.
532
00:26:01,685 --> 00:26:03,345
Bernard told me all about it.
533
00:26:08,275 --> 00:26:09,315
What'd he say?
534
00:26:10,443 --> 00:26:14,363
Bernard said that Kelvin was delivered
by Santa Claus in a Easter basket
535
00:26:14,447 --> 00:26:16,867
as a gift on Aaliyah's birthday.
536
00:26:16,950 --> 00:26:18,830
I hope I get a brother for my birthday.
537
00:26:19,452 --> 00:26:22,502
Aww. You better not.
538
00:26:25,208 --> 00:26:28,038
Oh. I don't know
why they even have trivia night.
539
00:26:28,128 --> 00:26:31,208
They ought to just
hand us the win when we hit the door.
540
00:26:31,298 --> 00:26:33,168
I gotta hand it to Bennie.
541
00:26:33,258 --> 00:26:35,468
Amy, Earth and Wind is a much better name.
542
00:26:36,970 --> 00:26:38,850
I knew I should've cut you off at six.
543
00:26:40,473 --> 00:26:42,273
Speaking of Bennie, let me get home
544
00:26:42,350 --> 00:26:45,230
before he thinks I've run away
with some random white guy.
545
00:26:45,312 --> 00:26:47,062
Ooh. I wouldn't mind running off with him.
546
00:26:47,939 --> 00:26:50,649
Ooh, look at you, drunk girl on the prowl.
547
00:26:51,276 --> 00:26:56,526
Like January says, "A husband
is just a stranger you said hello to."
548
00:26:58,867 --> 00:27:00,737
What? That calendar don't say that.
549
00:27:02,037 --> 00:27:03,827
I'm making my own calendar.
550
00:27:03,913 --> 00:27:06,833
And every month
is gonna have a picture of that dude.
551
00:27:09,336 --> 00:27:10,416
Ugh.
552
00:27:11,338 --> 00:27:14,218
Of course. All the hot ones are gay.
553
00:27:14,799 --> 00:27:18,299
Stop it, okay? 'Cause you know
that you cannot judge a book by its…
554
00:27:21,973 --> 00:27:22,853
Bernard?
555
00:27:24,851 --> 00:27:25,691
What?
556
00:27:28,813 --> 00:27:30,443
[theme music playing]
39456
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