Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,750 --> 00:00:11,988
# Some people seem so
obsessed with the morning
2
00:00:11,990 --> 00:00:15,310
# Get up early just to
watch the sun rise
3
00:00:17,030 --> 00:00:21,468
# Some people like it more
when there's fire in the sky
4
00:00:21,470 --> 00:00:24,270
# Worship the sun when it's high
5
00:00:26,230 --> 00:00:29,988
# Some people go
for those sultry evenings
6
00:00:29,990 --> 00:00:34,148
# Sipping cocktails in the
blue, red and grey
7
00:00:34,150 --> 00:00:40,550
# But I like every minute of the day
8
00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:51,790
# I like every second,
so long as you are on my mind
9
00:00:53,750 --> 00:00:56,708
# Every moment has its special charm
10
00:00:56,710 --> 00:01:02,110
# It's all right when you're around,
rain or shine
11
00:01:03,870 --> 00:01:07,668
# The people on the hill,
they say I'm lazy
12
00:01:07,670 --> 00:01:11,230
# But when they sleep,
I sing and dance
13
00:01:12,830 --> 00:01:16,628
# Some people have to have
the sultry evenings
14
00:01:16,630 --> 00:01:20,628
# Cocktails in the
blue, red and grey
15
00:01:20,630 --> 00:01:24,508
# But I like every minute
of the day... #
16
00:01:24,510 --> 00:01:26,268
AIR WHISTLES
17
00:01:26,270 --> 00:01:28,350
EXPLOSION
18
00:01:40,750 --> 00:01:42,948
SIRENS WAIL
19
00:01:42,950 --> 00:01:44,910
DISTANT CONVERSATION
20
00:01:53,750 --> 00:01:56,548
What did I tell you about
air raids not killing people?
21
00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:58,828
My bed simply
went through the floor,
22
00:01:58,830 --> 00:02:00,788
and Plon-Plon and I went on it.
23
00:02:00,790 --> 00:02:02,510
Perfectly comfortable!
24
00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:06,830
Linda Radlett was not only
my favourite cousin...
25
00:02:08,910 --> 00:02:12,870
..but then, and for many years,
my favourite human being.
26
00:02:22,230 --> 00:02:24,190
Don't pity me, Fanny.
27
00:02:28,070 --> 00:02:32,950
I've had five months of perfect
and unalloyed happiness.
28
00:02:34,190 --> 00:02:37,748
Very few people can say that in the
course of long lives, I imagine.
29
00:02:37,750 --> 00:02:39,110
Very few.
30
00:02:41,390 --> 00:02:44,068
As we turned down the drive
at Alconleigh,
31
00:02:44,070 --> 00:02:47,788
I asked myself if Linda's five
months of perfect happiness
32
00:02:47,790 --> 00:02:51,710
were quite worth all the chaos
and confusion of the other 29 years.
33
00:02:53,110 --> 00:02:57,110
But I often thought about
things like that with Linda.
34
00:02:58,230 --> 00:03:00,550
It always feels like Christmas,
coming home.
35
00:03:03,150 --> 00:03:04,350
I know.
36
00:03:07,150 --> 00:03:09,308
Ever since I was a small child,
37
00:03:09,310 --> 00:03:12,068
I was sent to spend
the Christmas holidays with Linda
38
00:03:12,070 --> 00:03:16,790
in a large, ugly, north-facing house
high on a hill in Oxfordshire.
39
00:03:18,750 --> 00:03:21,830
Most of these Christmases
were marked with violence.
40
00:03:23,270 --> 00:03:25,868
There was the time Linda's pony
lay on her in the brook
41
00:03:25,870 --> 00:03:27,190
and nearly drowned her.
42
00:03:28,230 --> 00:03:31,348
The time she tried to kill herself
in an attempt to rejoin
43
00:03:31,350 --> 00:03:34,550
a smelly old Border terrier
which Uncle Matthew had put down.
44
00:03:35,950 --> 00:03:37,908
The time she decided to tell
45
00:03:37,910 --> 00:03:40,110
the daughters of some
neighbours the facts of life...
46
00:03:41,630 --> 00:03:44,550
..resulting in dreadful
beatings from Uncle Matthew...
47
00:03:46,790 --> 00:03:49,710
..and luncheon alone
for two whole weeks.
48
00:03:51,470 --> 00:03:53,030
Linda hated to be alone.
49
00:03:55,350 --> 00:03:57,748
She was a wild and nervous creature,
50
00:03:57,750 --> 00:03:59,430
full of passion and longing.
51
00:04:12,710 --> 00:04:14,708
But of all the Christmases,
52
00:04:14,710 --> 00:04:18,588
the Christmas I remember
the most was when we were 17,
53
00:04:18,590 --> 00:04:21,110
and Linda decided that her
life had to begin.
54
00:05:01,830 --> 00:05:03,870
CHILDREN CHATTER
55
00:05:06,030 --> 00:05:09,108
No, you can't give the dog a cake
before you give me a piece!
56
00:05:09,110 --> 00:05:10,508
That's not fair!
57
00:05:10,510 --> 00:05:13,148
I stumbled into the hall
and found Linda's mother,
58
00:05:13,150 --> 00:05:16,308
my Aunt Sadie, and the children
having tea as they always did,
59
00:05:16,310 --> 00:05:19,388
in front of the fireplace, over
which hung, as it always had,
60
00:05:19,390 --> 00:05:21,308
the entrenching tool
Uncle Matthew had used
61
00:05:21,310 --> 00:05:26,070
to whack to death eight Germans as
they crawled out of a dugout in
1915.
62
00:05:27,950 --> 00:05:30,108
Linda's father, my Uncle Matthew,
63
00:05:30,110 --> 00:05:31,268
knew no middle course.
64
00:05:31,270 --> 00:05:33,828
He either loved or he hated,
65
00:05:33,830 --> 00:05:36,828
and, generally,
it must be said, he hated.
66
00:05:36,830 --> 00:05:40,948
I hate Huns, Frogs,
Americans, Catholics
67
00:05:40,950 --> 00:05:45,228
and all other foreigners,
but above all, I hate children!
68
00:05:45,230 --> 00:05:47,668
He had four beautiful bloodhounds,
69
00:05:47,670 --> 00:05:49,068
with which, every Christmas,
70
00:05:49,070 --> 00:05:51,868
he would hunt his children,
and a pair of stock whips
71
00:05:51,870 --> 00:05:54,588
he cracked on the lawn
every morning at dawn.
72
00:05:54,590 --> 00:05:56,548
Had the Radletts been poor,
73
00:05:56,550 --> 00:05:59,268
he no doubt would have been
sent to prison for beating
74
00:05:59,270 --> 00:06:00,950
and refusing to educate them.
75
00:06:02,350 --> 00:06:06,028
Uncle Matthew loathed
educated females...
76
00:06:06,030 --> 00:06:07,430
..particularly me.
77
00:06:09,990 --> 00:06:12,508
CHILDREN: Fanny!
78
00:06:12,510 --> 00:06:14,828
Fanny! You're here!
79
00:06:14,830 --> 00:06:18,108
Fanny, welcome.
You must be exhausted.
80
00:06:18,110 --> 00:06:20,268
Come and have a cup of tea.
How was your journey?
81
00:06:20,270 --> 00:06:22,068
Come and sit in Jassy's chair.
82
00:06:22,070 --> 00:06:24,748
As always, Linda was the most
pleased to see me,
83
00:06:24,750 --> 00:06:25,988
but determined not to show it.
84
00:06:25,990 --> 00:06:27,508
Linda?
85
00:06:27,510 --> 00:06:28,908
Fanny's here.
86
00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:30,828
Would you like a cup of tea?
87
00:06:30,830 --> 00:06:32,430
Yes, please.
88
00:06:36,710 --> 00:06:37,950
Hello.
89
00:06:39,990 --> 00:06:41,908
Where's your mouse?
90
00:06:41,910 --> 00:06:44,908
Oh, she got a sore back and died.
91
00:06:44,910 --> 00:06:46,748
Had you been riding it?
92
00:06:46,750 --> 00:06:49,948
Nobody cried so much
or so often as Linda.
93
00:06:49,950 --> 00:06:52,508
That's how they always die.
It's some sort of urinary disease.
94
00:06:52,510 --> 00:06:56,030
Anything, but especially anything
about animals, would set her off.
95
00:06:58,750 --> 00:07:01,708
Her emotions were
on no ordinary plane.
96
00:07:01,710 --> 00:07:03,668
She loved or she loathed.
97
00:07:03,670 --> 00:07:05,348
She laughed or she cried.
98
00:07:05,350 --> 00:07:07,550
She lived in
a world of superlatives.
99
00:07:14,750 --> 00:07:19,028
Linda was the chairman of a secret
club called the Hons Society.
100
00:07:19,030 --> 00:07:22,588
Its headquarters was a linen
cupboard at the top of the house.
101
00:07:22,590 --> 00:07:24,028
Six. OK.
102
00:07:24,030 --> 00:07:25,468
That's great.
103
00:07:25,470 --> 00:07:27,348
Three-quarters. Well done.
104
00:07:27,350 --> 00:07:29,548
The dead mouse was
quickly forgotten.
105
00:07:29,550 --> 00:07:31,188
Even smaller than last year.
106
00:07:31,190 --> 00:07:34,148
Your hair's got long. Neck, tummy.
107
00:07:34,150 --> 00:07:36,508
One...
108
00:07:36,510 --> 00:07:39,148
Seven and a third.
109
00:07:39,150 --> 00:07:42,908
So I win on arms, eyes,
waist, ankles,
110
00:07:42,910 --> 00:07:45,868
and you win on bust.
Hmm. I hate bust.
111
00:07:45,870 --> 00:07:48,708
Farmers love busts!
112
00:07:48,710 --> 00:07:51,868
Linda and I were both in love
with people we had never met,
113
00:07:51,870 --> 00:07:53,748
I with a fat, red-faced
114
00:07:53,750 --> 00:07:55,548
middle-aged farmer I sometimes saw
115
00:07:55,550 --> 00:07:57,268
riding through the village,
116
00:07:57,270 --> 00:08:00,108
and Linda with the Prince of Wales.
117
00:08:00,110 --> 00:08:02,508
Why can't your prince and my farmer
118
00:08:02,510 --> 00:08:03,868
be invited to Louisa's ball?
119
00:08:03,870 --> 00:08:06,788
Because Matthew won't let
anyone fanciable
120
00:08:06,790 --> 00:08:08,508
within 50 miles of the house.
121
00:08:08,510 --> 00:08:10,748
A coming-out ball was planned
that Christmas
122
00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:12,268
for Linda's older sister, Louisa.
123
00:08:12,270 --> 00:08:13,588
We're trapped!
124
00:08:13,590 --> 00:08:16,988
Our only hope is the Prince
breaking down in his motor car.
125
00:08:16,990 --> 00:08:21,908
LOW-PITCHED: "Pray, who is
that beautiful young lady?
126
00:08:21,910 --> 00:08:23,028
"I wish to marry her."
127
00:08:23,030 --> 00:08:25,948
LOW-PITCHED: "Well, you can't!
She's here under lock and key!
128
00:08:25,950 --> 00:08:28,348
"I killed 15 Germans
with an entrenching tool!
129
00:08:28,350 --> 00:08:29,868
"I can certainly kill you!"
130
00:08:29,870 --> 00:08:31,428
"He must have your daughter, sir.
131
00:08:31,430 --> 00:08:33,788
"His happiness depends on it,
and subsequently,
132
00:08:33,790 --> 00:08:36,950
"so does the happiness of England."
133
00:08:37,950 --> 00:08:40,748
Even then, Linda's fantasies were
altogether more ambitious
134
00:08:40,750 --> 00:08:43,068
and dangerous than mine.
KNOCK ON DOOR
135
00:08:43,070 --> 00:08:44,828
I want to sit next to Fanny!
136
00:08:44,830 --> 00:08:46,508
Oh, you took your time!
137
00:08:46,510 --> 00:08:48,348
This better be good, Linda. It is.
138
00:08:48,350 --> 00:08:50,908
It's so hot in here.
Talk about back to the womb!
139
00:08:50,910 --> 00:08:53,428
It's more welcoming than
my mother's womb, I imagine.
140
00:08:53,430 --> 00:08:55,828
Fanny, it is unfair that you
have wicked parents and not me.
141
00:08:55,830 --> 00:08:58,708
So you aspire to being wicked
and adulterous, do you, Linda?
142
00:08:58,710 --> 00:09:00,508
No. I aspire to true love.
143
00:09:00,510 --> 00:09:03,428
The kind of which only comes once in
a lifetime and lasts for ever.
144
00:09:03,430 --> 00:09:04,870
LINDA CLEARS HER THROAT
145
00:09:06,110 --> 00:09:09,428
The news I have for the Hons today,
while of considerable Hon interest,
146
00:09:09,430 --> 00:09:11,510
generally particularly concerns...
147
00:09:12,590 --> 00:09:14,550
..Fanny! Oh!
148
00:09:16,150 --> 00:09:18,748
Aunt Emily is engaged.
149
00:09:18,750 --> 00:09:20,588
COUSINS GASP AND GIGGLE
150
00:09:20,590 --> 00:09:22,428
No, Linda, you're making it up.
151
00:09:22,430 --> 00:09:24,830
I found proof.
"My dear sister Sadie...
152
00:09:26,950 --> 00:09:30,028
"..not to tell the children
we're engaged.
153
00:09:30,030 --> 00:09:33,228
"The captain and I will arrive
late on Christmas Eve
154
00:09:33,230 --> 00:09:35,628
"and stay in time for Louisa's
party, of course.
155
00:09:35,630 --> 00:09:37,868
"All love from Emily."
156
00:09:37,870 --> 00:09:39,788
Why would she want
to get married, anyway?
157
00:09:39,790 --> 00:09:41,028
She can't love him.
158
00:09:41,030 --> 00:09:43,468
He's 40. He must be ancient.
159
00:09:43,470 --> 00:09:45,388
Maybe he'll fall in love
with Fanny.
160
00:09:45,390 --> 00:09:48,748
Aunt Emily had brought me up
ever since I was a baby.
161
00:09:48,750 --> 00:09:51,868
It had always been just her and me.
162
00:09:51,870 --> 00:09:54,468
Aunt Sadie had two sisters -
163
00:09:54,470 --> 00:09:56,668
my mother and Aunt Emily.
164
00:09:56,670 --> 00:09:59,388
At the age of 19, my mother,
165
00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:01,988
feeling herself too
beautiful and gay to be
166
00:10:01,990 --> 00:10:04,228
burdened with a baby,
left my father for another man,
167
00:10:04,230 --> 00:10:06,070
and gave me to Aunt Emily
to bring up.
168
00:10:10,550 --> 00:10:11,828
Goodbye, darling!
169
00:10:11,830 --> 00:10:14,228
My impetuous mother
subsequently ran away so often
170
00:10:14,230 --> 00:10:16,068
and with so many different men
171
00:10:16,070 --> 00:10:19,350
that she became known to her family
and friends as "The Bolter".
172
00:10:23,670 --> 00:10:25,308
There you are, darling...
173
00:10:25,310 --> 00:10:27,748
Occasionally she would reappear
like a meteor,
174
00:10:27,750 --> 00:10:30,028
showering me with her extravagance,
175
00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:32,828
and I would long to be caught
up in her fiery trails
176
00:10:32,830 --> 00:10:34,350
and be carried away...
177
00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:38,750
...but she would always vanish
off again to a new man.
178
00:10:49,070 --> 00:10:51,788
And in my heart,
I knew how lucky I was
179
00:10:51,790 --> 00:10:55,030
to have safe, reliable,
kind Aunt Emily.
180
00:11:17,110 --> 00:11:18,508
Come on, Fanny!
181
00:11:18,510 --> 00:11:20,510
Get dressed, lazybones!
182
00:11:28,110 --> 00:11:30,308
The Radletts loved animals,
183
00:11:30,310 --> 00:11:32,628
but more than anything
in the world,
184
00:11:32,630 --> 00:11:35,348
they loved to hunt foxes.
HUNTING HORN BLARES
185
00:11:35,350 --> 00:11:37,390
All away!
186
00:11:40,470 --> 00:11:42,470
LINDA LAUGHS
187
00:12:07,230 --> 00:12:08,430
Oh!
188
00:12:16,750 --> 00:12:19,910
Where is her Ladyship, your
mother, hunting this Christmas?
189
00:12:21,070 --> 00:12:22,788
She's in Paris, Josh.
190
00:12:22,790 --> 00:12:26,028
No human being like her Ladyship
I ever saw on a horse.
191
00:12:26,030 --> 00:12:27,708
And look at you.
192
00:12:27,710 --> 00:12:29,668
Jostling about in that saddle.
193
00:12:29,670 --> 00:12:34,108
Miss Linda takes after her Ladyship,
your mother, something wonderful.
194
00:12:34,110 --> 00:12:35,668
Why is that good?
195
00:12:35,670 --> 00:12:38,270
Isn't my mother supposed to
be wicked, Josh?
196
00:12:41,270 --> 00:12:43,270
BOTH: Here's Fanny!
197
00:12:44,710 --> 00:12:47,388
Darling, may I introduce you
to Captain Warbeck?
198
00:12:47,390 --> 00:12:48,910
Please only ever call me Davey.
199
00:12:50,910 --> 00:12:53,348
He looked different
with his clothes on.
200
00:12:53,350 --> 00:12:57,230
You must find it a terrible joke,
old people like us getting married.
201
00:13:01,470 --> 00:13:03,430
No, of course not.
202
00:13:09,190 --> 00:13:12,550
Captain David Warbeck.
203
00:13:13,790 --> 00:13:15,708
He doesn't look much like
a military man.
204
00:13:15,710 --> 00:13:18,188
Or a marrying one,
for that matter.
205
00:13:18,190 --> 00:13:21,348
Can't see him killing any Germans
with an entrenching tool.
206
00:13:21,350 --> 00:13:23,030
Hm.
207
00:13:26,670 --> 00:13:27,868
Ah...
208
00:13:27,870 --> 00:13:29,670
WATER SPLASHES
Ooh.
209
00:13:30,870 --> 00:13:35,148
Matthew is frightening,
and I disapprove of him so,
210
00:13:35,150 --> 00:13:38,990
but in a way I feel he sets
the bar for English manhood.
211
00:13:40,990 --> 00:13:42,588
Don't be sad.
212
00:13:42,590 --> 00:13:45,148
Yeah, but it's always been
just me and Emily.
213
00:13:45,150 --> 00:13:47,750
You'll always have boring old me!
214
00:13:55,790 --> 00:14:01,348
Did you know that ducks can only
copulate in running water?
215
00:14:01,350 --> 00:14:02,588
No.
216
00:14:02,590 --> 00:14:04,348
Good luck to them.
217
00:14:04,350 --> 00:14:07,508
WHISPERS: Aunt Emily
copulated last night.
218
00:14:07,510 --> 00:14:10,028
They were all twisted around
each other
219
00:14:10,030 --> 00:14:11,548
when I went in there this morning.
220
00:14:11,550 --> 00:14:14,188
Really?!
221
00:14:14,190 --> 00:14:18,148
Oh, God! How? Show me! Show me how!
222
00:14:18,150 --> 00:14:20,788
You're sex obsessed.
I know, it's true.
223
00:14:20,790 --> 00:14:24,428
I masturbate every time I
think about Lady Jane Grey.
224
00:14:24,430 --> 00:14:26,548
And I think about her
all the time!
225
00:14:26,550 --> 00:14:29,148
FANNY SHRIEKS
Fanny!
226
00:14:29,150 --> 00:14:30,868
BOTH LAUGH
227
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,908
HE GUFFAWS
228
00:14:32,910 --> 00:14:35,870
Davey! You are a clever cove!
229
00:14:37,030 --> 00:14:39,588
He says these Charles II
salt-shakers
230
00:14:39,590 --> 00:14:41,868
we thought we'd had
in the family for 300 years
231
00:14:41,870 --> 00:14:44,548
are really Georgian imitations,
not valuable at all!
232
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:46,190
HE BANGS ON TABLE
233
00:14:48,110 --> 00:14:50,708
Children, you are so lucky
234
00:14:50,710 --> 00:14:53,668
to be related to this
extraordinary fellow.
235
00:14:53,670 --> 00:14:56,668
Yes, he's a terrific Hon.
236
00:14:56,670 --> 00:15:00,268
Oh, um, well, we have
a Hons Society.
237
00:15:00,270 --> 00:15:03,108
If you're a member,
you're honourable,
238
00:15:03,110 --> 00:15:04,988
and our enemies are
Counter Hons.
239
00:15:04,990 --> 00:15:07,070
I'm honoured to be a Hon!
240
00:15:08,430 --> 00:15:13,668
Davey, maybe you can influence Emily
on the subject of female education.
241
00:15:13,670 --> 00:15:17,588
It's done Fanny absolutely no good
whatsoever, as far as I can tell.
242
00:15:17,590 --> 00:15:19,468
She's picked up some dreadful
expressions
243
00:15:19,470 --> 00:15:20,868
from that school of hers.
244
00:15:20,870 --> 00:15:22,268
Very likely she did.
245
00:15:22,270 --> 00:15:25,548
Awful words like "mantelpiece"
and "notepaper"
246
00:15:25,550 --> 00:15:27,948
keep coming out of her mouth,
and her poor husband,
247
00:15:27,950 --> 00:15:29,908
if she ever gets one...
248
00:15:29,910 --> 00:15:31,668
A lot of men would find it
more irritating
249
00:15:31,670 --> 00:15:34,188
to have a wife who'd never
heard of George III,
250
00:15:34,190 --> 00:15:36,868
or been allowed off their
family premises to pursue
251
00:15:36,870 --> 00:15:38,748
any sort of normal life.
252
00:15:38,750 --> 00:15:41,868
They have absolutely everything
they will ever need here!
253
00:15:41,870 --> 00:15:43,988
Church, stables, tennis court.
254
00:15:43,990 --> 00:15:46,228
Why would they ever want to leave?
255
00:15:46,230 --> 00:15:49,068
You don't have to go to some awful
middle-class establishment
256
00:15:49,070 --> 00:15:51,068
to learn who George III was.
257
00:15:51,070 --> 00:15:53,750
Anyway, who was he, Fanny? Hmm?
258
00:15:58,430 --> 00:16:00,150
He was King.
259
00:16:01,430 --> 00:16:03,710
And he went mad and...
260
00:16:07,710 --> 00:16:09,828
Most illuminating.
261
00:16:09,830 --> 00:16:12,668
Well worth losing every ounce
of feminine charm
262
00:16:12,670 --> 00:16:15,308
to learn that, I must say, Fanny.
263
00:16:15,310 --> 00:16:17,628
Thighs like gateposts from
playing hockey,
264
00:16:17,630 --> 00:16:20,188
and the worst seat on a horse
of any woman I've ever seen.
265
00:16:20,190 --> 00:16:23,748
Linda, you're uneducated,
thank God.
266
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:26,190
What do you have to say
about George III?
267
00:16:28,030 --> 00:16:30,990
Well, he was the son
of poor Fred and...
268
00:16:31,990 --> 00:16:34,548
..oh, he was the father
of Beau Brummell's fat friend.
269
00:16:34,550 --> 00:16:38,388
Oh, and he was one of those
vacillators, you know?
270
00:16:38,390 --> 00:16:41,228
I am his Highness's dog at Kew
271
00:16:41,230 --> 00:16:43,468
Pray tell me, sir, whose dog
are you?
272
00:16:43,470 --> 00:16:45,990
Ooh! How sweet!
273
00:16:47,190 --> 00:16:50,348
Oh... No, and Fanny doesn't
have thighs like gateposts.
274
00:16:50,350 --> 00:16:51,670
Her thighs are perfect.
275
00:16:56,870 --> 00:16:58,588
I'd like to go to school.
276
00:16:58,590 --> 00:17:00,510
Oh, do shut up!
277
00:17:02,830 --> 00:17:05,788
Matthew's trapped
his daughters here.
278
00:17:05,790 --> 00:17:08,308
They manage to bridge
gulfs of ignorance
279
00:17:08,310 --> 00:17:10,508
with charm and high spirits
280
00:17:10,510 --> 00:17:13,828
and odds and ends of knowledge
they've picked up.
281
00:17:13,830 --> 00:17:16,788
You're better off
not being like Linda.
282
00:17:16,790 --> 00:17:19,188
She lacks all discipline.
283
00:17:19,190 --> 00:17:20,870
Could easily come to nothing.
284
00:17:21,990 --> 00:17:23,750
She does remind me of The Bolter.
285
00:17:24,790 --> 00:17:26,670
I don't want her to come to nothing.
286
00:17:28,790 --> 00:17:30,188
No.
287
00:17:30,190 --> 00:17:32,068
WOMAN SINGS ARIA
288
00:17:32,070 --> 00:17:33,310
DISTANT CRACK
289
00:17:34,710 --> 00:17:36,390
CRACKING CONTINUES
290
00:17:38,430 --> 00:17:40,950
HE SINGS ALONG TO ARIA
291
00:17:51,350 --> 00:17:53,668
ARIA CONTINUES
292
00:17:53,670 --> 00:17:56,310
HE SINGS ALONG
293
00:18:04,590 --> 00:18:06,748
ARIA REACHES CRESCENDO
294
00:18:06,750 --> 00:18:09,148
HE SINGS ALONG TUNELESSLY
295
00:18:09,150 --> 00:18:11,308
MUSIC CONTINUES
296
00:18:11,310 --> 00:18:13,550
WHIP CRACKS
297
00:18:20,870 --> 00:18:22,950
LINDA LAUGHS
298
00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:26,070
FANNY WHIMPERS
299
00:18:29,110 --> 00:18:31,788
Please don't bolt.
Don't ever leave me.
300
00:18:31,790 --> 00:18:35,108
Why would I bolt when I'm going
to marry the Prince of Wales?
301
00:18:35,110 --> 00:18:38,508
And have a train 40 feet long.
302
00:18:38,510 --> 00:18:40,428
12 bridesmaids.
303
00:18:40,430 --> 00:18:42,308
And you'll be the chief one.
304
00:18:42,310 --> 00:18:43,908
What happens then?
305
00:18:43,910 --> 00:18:46,348
You'll be happily ever after,
and what about me?
306
00:18:46,350 --> 00:18:47,870
You'll be with me.
307
00:18:49,830 --> 00:18:52,668
Chatting and having baths,
like always,
308
00:18:52,670 --> 00:18:56,468
and being wise and clever
and funny and kind
309
00:18:56,470 --> 00:18:58,428
and the best thing there is,
310
00:18:58,430 --> 00:19:00,910
because you know I'm lost
without you.
311
00:19:02,630 --> 00:19:04,388
What if you die?
312
00:19:04,390 --> 00:19:06,868
I won't die!
313
00:19:06,870 --> 00:19:10,830
I'm not that sort of person.
314
00:19:13,630 --> 00:19:15,908
Darling Linda,
315
00:19:15,910 --> 00:19:18,788
I'm going to drag you
out of this place for ever
316
00:19:18,790 --> 00:19:22,068
and copulate with you in running
water like a divine duck,
317
00:19:22,070 --> 00:19:24,788
and my goodness,
how you'll live!
318
00:19:24,790 --> 00:19:28,548
We don't want strangers here,
anyway, stinking the place up.
319
00:19:28,550 --> 00:19:30,268
Well, you'll have to do something,
320
00:19:30,270 --> 00:19:33,348
or there'll be no men at all at your
oldest daughter's coming-out ball.
321
00:19:33,350 --> 00:19:35,668
Oh, shut up!
There's Josh the groom!
322
00:19:35,670 --> 00:19:37,588
And I've plenty of friends
in the House of Lords
323
00:19:37,590 --> 00:19:40,708
who'll be happy to come
if I promise them a shoot.
324
00:19:40,710 --> 00:19:42,750
RECORD PLAYS
325
00:19:44,350 --> 00:19:46,668
Despite his suspicion
of strangers,
326
00:19:46,670 --> 00:19:49,108
Uncle Matthew couldn't do
anything to stop
327
00:19:49,110 --> 00:19:50,548
the day of Louisa's ball arriving.
328
00:19:50,550 --> 00:19:52,510
LOUISA CLEARS HER THROAT
329
00:20:04,470 --> 00:20:06,948
As promised,
Louisa's dance partners
330
00:20:06,950 --> 00:20:09,790
were Uncle Matthew's friends
from the House of Lords...
331
00:20:15,790 --> 00:20:17,110
..and Josh the groom.
332
00:20:21,150 --> 00:20:22,188
Ow!
333
00:20:22,190 --> 00:20:24,028
Oh, so sorry.
Oh, no, no, it's fine.
334
00:20:24,030 --> 00:20:25,908
QUIET CONVERSATION
335
00:20:25,910 --> 00:20:28,710
FOOTSTEPS THUD
336
00:20:32,910 --> 00:20:34,428
You're very patient.
337
00:20:34,430 --> 00:20:35,870
Thank you.
338
00:20:41,670 --> 00:20:43,510
SHE YAWNS
339
00:20:45,350 --> 00:20:48,788
All so small and ugly.
340
00:20:48,790 --> 00:20:51,030
Old and ugly!
341
00:21:00,590 --> 00:21:05,150
The evening was saved from utter
disillusionment by a late arrival...
342
00:21:07,950 --> 00:21:10,628
..Alconleigh's nearest neighbour.
343
00:21:10,630 --> 00:21:12,030
# Pawn of none
344
00:21:13,030 --> 00:21:17,148
# Born with steel reins on the heart
345
00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:19,108
# Of the sun... #
346
00:21:19,110 --> 00:21:23,068
Lord Merlin was an artist,
a musician
347
00:21:23,070 --> 00:21:25,108
and a patron of all the young.
348
00:21:25,110 --> 00:21:30,228
# Exalted companion
of cocaine nights
349
00:21:30,230 --> 00:21:34,268
# Cos he's a Dandy in the Underworld
350
00:21:34,270 --> 00:21:37,110
# Dandy in the Underworld... #
351
00:21:38,310 --> 00:21:40,230
What a set!
352
00:21:42,190 --> 00:21:44,308
It was rumoured he had
two black whippets
353
00:21:44,310 --> 00:21:47,628
who wore diamond necklaces,
and a playhouse in the garden
354
00:21:47,630 --> 00:21:51,028
where he put on such extravagances
as Dada plays from Paris
355
00:21:51,030 --> 00:21:53,510
and jazz poetry from Harlem.
356
00:21:55,510 --> 00:21:57,350
Uncle Matthew loathed him.
357
00:21:59,150 --> 00:22:01,470
There's a man carrying a comb!
358
00:22:03,230 --> 00:22:04,788
Davey!
359
00:22:04,790 --> 00:22:07,148
# To destruction he fell
360
00:22:07,150 --> 00:22:12,748
# Now he forever stalks
the ancient mansions of hell
361
00:22:12,750 --> 00:22:16,708
# Cos he's a Dandy in the Underworld
362
00:22:16,710 --> 00:22:19,508
# Dandy in the Underworld
363
00:22:19,510 --> 00:22:23,708
# When will he come up for air? #
364
00:22:23,710 --> 00:22:25,988
I can introduce you, if you like.
365
00:22:25,990 --> 00:22:28,068
No, Davey.
366
00:22:28,070 --> 00:22:30,110
Our dresses are too bad.
367
00:22:32,190 --> 00:22:34,788
# Sha-la shoo-be-doo
368
00:22:34,790 --> 00:22:37,948
# Sha-la
shoo-be-doo
369
00:22:37,950 --> 00:22:41,308
# Sha-la shoo-be-doo, ahh! #
370
00:22:41,310 --> 00:22:43,308
I'm going to the cupboard.
371
00:22:43,310 --> 00:22:44,668
Yes, me too.
372
00:22:44,670 --> 00:22:46,908
# Sha-la shoo-be-doo
373
00:22:46,910 --> 00:22:49,868
# Sha-la
shoo-be-doo
374
00:22:49,870 --> 00:22:55,068
# Sha-la shoo-be-doo, ahh!
375
00:22:55,070 --> 00:22:58,588
# Cos he's a Dandy in the Underworld
376
00:22:58,590 --> 00:23:01,828
# Dandy in the Underworld
377
00:23:01,830 --> 00:23:06,308
# When will he come up for air?
378
00:23:06,310 --> 00:23:11,790
# Oh, will anybody ever care?
379
00:23:12,750 --> 00:23:16,508
# Cos he's a Dandy in the Underworld
380
00:23:16,510 --> 00:23:19,310
# Dandy in the Underworld... #
381
00:23:34,630 --> 00:23:37,668
I'm officially renouncing
His Royal Highness.
382
00:23:37,670 --> 00:23:39,308
From now on I will devote myself
383
00:23:39,310 --> 00:23:43,268
to being one of those bright
young things of Merlin's.
384
00:23:43,270 --> 00:23:47,428
Merlin's friends are more
in my mother's...orbit.
385
00:23:47,430 --> 00:23:51,830
Oh, they're so beautiful
and sophisticated.
386
00:23:54,230 --> 00:23:56,708
Don't you just...
SHE KISSES
387
00:23:56,710 --> 00:23:59,948
..ache for life
to be exciting, like this?
388
00:23:59,950 --> 00:24:03,588
Hm. I think I'd like to
observe exciting things.
389
00:24:03,590 --> 00:24:04,868
LINDA SIGHS
390
00:24:04,870 --> 00:24:07,148
If only there were exciting things!
391
00:24:07,150 --> 00:24:08,268
You!
392
00:24:08,270 --> 00:24:10,788
You're an exciting thing!
393
00:24:10,790 --> 00:24:13,470
LINDA LAUGHS
You are!
394
00:24:15,230 --> 00:24:17,270
We are.
395
00:24:20,350 --> 00:24:22,228
SHE KISSES
396
00:24:22,230 --> 00:24:24,030
We do everything together.
397
00:24:26,910 --> 00:24:28,670
I'd be lost without you.
398
00:24:35,030 --> 00:24:37,948
But the brief appearance
of Lord Merlin's house party
399
00:24:37,950 --> 00:24:41,908
only made the walls of Linda's
fortress appear higher than ever.
400
00:24:41,910 --> 00:24:45,468
She became paralysed in
her longing for life and love,
401
00:24:45,470 --> 00:24:48,988
and all she could do
was lie about waiting for it.
402
00:24:48,990 --> 00:24:50,790
CLOCK TICKS
403
00:24:52,230 --> 00:24:54,548
What's the time, darling? Guess.
404
00:24:54,550 --> 00:24:57,308
Quarter to six. Better than that.
405
00:24:57,310 --> 00:24:59,148
Six. Not quite so good.
406
00:24:59,150 --> 00:25:00,748
Five to. Yes!
407
00:25:00,750 --> 00:25:03,110
It's forever until we come out!
408
00:25:04,430 --> 00:25:06,268
I can't live that long!
409
00:25:06,270 --> 00:25:08,588
"As long as she thinks of a man,
410
00:25:08,590 --> 00:25:10,428
"nobody objects to a woman
thinking."
411
00:25:10,430 --> 00:25:12,868
That's what Virginia Woolf
has to say.
412
00:25:12,870 --> 00:25:15,428
Well, then, no-one will object,
cos I only think about men.
413
00:25:15,430 --> 00:25:17,828
Maybe that's because you
haven't been educated properly.
414
00:25:17,830 --> 00:25:20,268
Or maybe it's because
everything else is boring!
415
00:25:20,270 --> 00:25:22,548
What is it you actually want?
416
00:25:22,550 --> 00:25:26,868
SHE SIGHS
I want to escape!
417
00:25:26,870 --> 00:25:32,468
And have fun and wear high heels
and go to the cinema
418
00:25:32,470 --> 00:25:35,990
and have sex and be adored by a man
and be in love!
419
00:25:37,350 --> 00:25:39,110
What do you want?
420
00:25:45,230 --> 00:25:46,870
Is life only about love?
421
00:25:47,910 --> 00:25:49,870
Oh. Yes!
422
00:25:56,230 --> 00:25:59,470
Louisa's dance had
an unexpected sequel.
423
00:26:09,870 --> 00:26:12,350
I don't know why you'd
want to marry someone so old.
424
00:26:15,990 --> 00:26:18,308
Louisa, half his hair
has slipped off his head,
425
00:26:18,310 --> 00:26:19,908
like an eiderdown off the bed!
426
00:26:19,910 --> 00:26:22,588
He's only 45. And you're 18!
427
00:26:22,590 --> 00:26:24,668
If he was a dog,
you'd have to put him down.
428
00:26:24,670 --> 00:26:27,588
I'm happy for
the first time in my life!
429
00:26:27,590 --> 00:26:29,268
I'm getting out...for ever.
430
00:26:29,270 --> 00:26:30,988
And you're going to be
stuck here, Linda,
431
00:26:30,990 --> 00:26:32,948
hunting and walking the
dogs with Fa.
432
00:26:32,950 --> 00:26:34,948
That's what comes of being
the favourite.
433
00:26:34,950 --> 00:26:36,748
Shut up! Don't you think
you're a bit too old
434
00:26:36,750 --> 00:26:39,630
to be sitting in a cupboard?
No, not really.
435
00:26:41,990 --> 00:26:44,108
I'm not having any bridesmaids,
by the way,
436
00:26:44,110 --> 00:26:45,908
so don't worry about your dresses.
437
00:26:45,910 --> 00:26:47,348
What?
438
00:26:47,350 --> 00:26:50,108
I'm not going to be upstaged on my
wedding day, thank you very much!
439
00:26:50,110 --> 00:26:53,388
Ohh! You're not having any
bridesmaids?
440
00:26:53,390 --> 00:26:57,150
No. You can't think how stupid
you're going to look from behind!
441
00:27:00,870 --> 00:27:02,668
Oh.
442
00:27:02,670 --> 00:27:04,910
Linda was really very jealous.
443
00:27:11,470 --> 00:27:14,070
Shall we go, then, Papa?
Yes, let's go.
444
00:27:17,270 --> 00:27:21,468
She looks like the eldest and
ugliest of the Bronte sisters.
445
00:27:21,470 --> 00:27:22,708
At that moment,
446
00:27:22,710 --> 00:27:25,428
I think Linda would have gladly
changed places with Louisa,
447
00:27:25,430 --> 00:27:26,988
even at the very heavy cost
448
00:27:26,990 --> 00:27:29,988
of living happily ever after with
John Fort-William.
449
00:27:29,990 --> 00:27:31,308
I want to die!
450
00:27:31,310 --> 00:27:35,070
Unless life begins absolutely
right now, I want to die!
451
00:27:36,390 --> 00:27:37,868
Push me, will you?
452
00:27:37,870 --> 00:27:40,828
Can you please...? Can you get
down, Linda, it's really high.
453
00:27:40,830 --> 00:27:42,550
LINDA GASPS
454
00:27:46,110 --> 00:27:48,588
If only it weren't such
a difficult thing to do.
455
00:27:48,590 --> 00:27:50,188
PHONE RINGS
456
00:27:50,190 --> 00:27:52,468
It's hard enough to kill
a rabbit, let alone oneself.
457
00:27:52,470 --> 00:27:54,068
SHE SIGHS
458
00:27:54,070 --> 00:27:55,828
It's that hog Merlin!
459
00:27:55,830 --> 00:27:59,788
I won't have my home filled
with Merlin's dago friends!
460
00:27:59,790 --> 00:28:01,748
I hear he has Frogs there too!
461
00:28:01,750 --> 00:28:04,188
I won't have Frogs or dagos
under any circumstances!
462
00:28:04,190 --> 00:28:05,708
Hello, Merlin.
463
00:28:05,710 --> 00:28:07,270
Oh, lunch would be lovely.
464
00:28:10,430 --> 00:28:11,950
WINGS FLAP
465
00:28:19,270 --> 00:28:21,268
What sort of birds are they?
466
00:28:21,270 --> 00:28:23,508
Just ordinary pigeons.
467
00:28:23,510 --> 00:28:26,868
Where do you get them that colour?
468
00:28:26,870 --> 00:28:29,028
I dye them. Every year.
469
00:28:29,030 --> 00:28:30,788
Dry them in the linen cupboard.
470
00:28:30,790 --> 00:28:33,348
Isn't that frightfully cruel?
Oh, no, they love it.
471
00:28:33,350 --> 00:28:35,708
They love it. It makes them
so pretty for each other.
472
00:28:35,710 --> 00:28:38,630
What about their poor little eyes?
Oh, they soon learn to shut them.
473
00:28:40,590 --> 00:28:44,030
I see you're taken with my silly old
Romantic Antoine Watteaus.
474
00:28:45,830 --> 00:28:47,508
Love isn't silly.
475
00:28:47,510 --> 00:28:49,388
Linda! It's my religion.
476
00:28:49,390 --> 00:28:50,990
AUNT SADIE SIGHS
477
00:28:52,390 --> 00:28:53,988
Is it really?
478
00:28:53,990 --> 00:28:56,908
That's all she can think about.
It's really rather alarming.
479
00:28:56,910 --> 00:28:58,548
WINGS FLAP
Oh!
480
00:28:58,550 --> 00:29:01,348
Gertie, leave her alone.
I'm so sorry.
481
00:29:01,350 --> 00:29:04,988
No, um...
I try to tell the girls
482
00:29:04,990 --> 00:29:07,428
that they've got to consider
practicalities.
483
00:29:07,430 --> 00:29:11,908
They've got to write down how they'd
run a household on £200 a year.
484
00:29:11,910 --> 00:29:15,188
Linda always just puts
"£199 - flowers".
485
00:29:15,190 --> 00:29:17,228
OTHERS LAUGH
486
00:29:17,230 --> 00:29:19,110
What lessons are you doing?
487
00:29:21,910 --> 00:29:22,990
None at all.
488
00:29:24,390 --> 00:29:26,988
Pa thinks that girls get fat
thighs from playing hockey
489
00:29:26,990 --> 00:29:29,428
if they go to school, but not that
Fanny has fat thighs.
490
00:29:29,430 --> 00:29:30,708
Hers are perfect.
491
00:29:30,710 --> 00:29:33,430
No, no, no, no, no. Linda...
492
00:29:34,590 --> 00:29:35,670
..you need...
493
00:29:36,750 --> 00:29:38,348
..educating.
494
00:29:38,350 --> 00:29:40,508
Yeah, that's what I said,
495
00:29:40,510 --> 00:29:42,430
but she doesn't listen to me.
496
00:29:52,430 --> 00:29:54,990
MUSIC OVER CONVERSATION
497
00:30:34,310 --> 00:30:36,470
LINDA SIGHS
498
00:30:40,710 --> 00:30:43,670
You have an intensely
romantic character.
499
00:30:44,670 --> 00:30:45,748
Hm.
500
00:30:45,750 --> 00:30:47,230
I see trouble ahead.
501
00:30:50,790 --> 00:30:52,988
I urge upon you the necessity
502
00:30:52,990 --> 00:30:55,270
for an intellectual background,
Linda.
503
00:30:57,110 --> 00:30:58,628
Hm!
504
00:30:58,630 --> 00:31:00,150
Although I fear...
505
00:31:01,350 --> 00:31:03,310
..it may already be too late.
506
00:31:07,790 --> 00:31:10,190
LORD MERLIN CHUCKLES
507
00:31:14,750 --> 00:31:16,070
Come on, then.
508
00:31:22,750 --> 00:31:26,668
For a while, Linda followed his
advice, finding comfort in books
509
00:31:26,670 --> 00:31:29,350
and things other than
the desperate pursuit of love,
510
00:31:30,790 --> 00:31:32,948
But finally, inevitably,
511
00:31:32,950 --> 00:31:35,668
the minutes turned to hours,
the hours to weeks,
512
00:31:35,670 --> 00:31:37,228
the weeks to months,
513
00:31:37,230 --> 00:31:39,230
and the impossible happened.
514
00:31:40,470 --> 00:31:42,670
CLOCK CHIMES
515
00:32:02,350 --> 00:32:05,990
We'd attained the great golden
goal of every childhood.
516
00:32:07,830 --> 00:32:09,470
We'd grown up.
517
00:32:54,870 --> 00:32:56,630
Would you like to dance?
518
00:32:58,630 --> 00:33:00,070
Yes, I would.
519
00:33:12,830 --> 00:33:17,388
Tony Kroesig - in his last year at
Oxford, a member of the Bullingdon.
520
00:33:17,390 --> 00:33:19,788
A splendid young man
with plenty of beautiful horses
521
00:33:19,790 --> 00:33:21,508
and exquisite clothes,
522
00:33:21,510 --> 00:33:24,028
he had already
a strong air of pomposity,
523
00:33:24,030 --> 00:33:26,188
a thing which Linda had never
come across before...
524
00:33:26,190 --> 00:33:28,428
It's awfully muddy where you live.
Hm!
525
00:33:28,430 --> 00:33:31,668
I hope your chauffeur knows
how to park a Rolls-Royce!
526
00:33:31,670 --> 00:33:33,908
BOTH LAUGH
527
00:33:33,910 --> 00:33:35,548
Yes.
528
00:33:35,550 --> 00:33:37,630
..and which she found
not unattractive.
529
00:33:54,430 --> 00:33:56,710
Who's that sewer with Linda?
530
00:33:58,070 --> 00:34:02,188
Kroesig. Governor of
the Bank of England - his son.
531
00:34:02,190 --> 00:34:04,308
Kroesig?!
532
00:34:04,310 --> 00:34:06,030
Good God!
533
00:34:07,030 --> 00:34:10,388
Never expected to be harbouring
a full-blooded Hun in the house!
534
00:34:10,390 --> 00:34:14,308
Matthew, dear, don't get excited.
The Kroesigs aren't Huns.
535
00:34:14,310 --> 00:34:16,588
They're a highly respected
family of bankers.
536
00:34:16,590 --> 00:34:18,548
They've been over here
for generations.
537
00:34:18,550 --> 00:34:20,068
Once a Hun, always a Hun.
538
00:34:20,070 --> 00:34:22,470
Good God!
539
00:34:23,510 --> 00:34:25,468
Does he know I still have
an entrenching tool
540
00:34:25,470 --> 00:34:27,508
I used to whack eight
of his countrymen to death?
541
00:34:27,510 --> 00:34:28,950
I don't suppose he does.
542
00:34:33,390 --> 00:34:36,988
I always said Merlin would bring
foreigners here eventually.
543
00:34:36,990 --> 00:34:39,870
I never thought he'd land us
with an actual German!
544
00:35:10,750 --> 00:35:13,310
Oh, no, look! The poor rabbit!
545
00:35:14,590 --> 00:35:16,350
SHE GASPS
546
00:35:30,790 --> 00:35:31,990
Oh!
547
00:35:36,390 --> 00:35:39,268
This was the one romantic
gesture of Tony's life.
548
00:35:39,270 --> 00:35:40,910
SHE SIGHS
549
00:35:42,190 --> 00:35:43,788
Tony went back to Oxford,
550
00:35:43,790 --> 00:35:46,470
and Linda sat about waiting
for the telephone bell.
551
00:35:48,550 --> 00:35:49,910
If this comes out...
552
00:35:51,510 --> 00:35:52,950
..he'll ring tomorrow.
553
00:35:57,590 --> 00:35:59,630
If this comes out...
554
00:36:00,990 --> 00:36:02,708
..he'll be at the meet.
555
00:36:02,710 --> 00:36:04,388
SHE SIGHS
556
00:36:04,390 --> 00:36:05,788
If this comes out...
557
00:36:05,790 --> 00:36:08,188
..he's thinking of me
at this very minute.
558
00:36:08,190 --> 00:36:09,748
PHONE RINGS
559
00:36:09,750 --> 00:36:11,150
SHE GASPS
560
00:36:15,270 --> 00:36:16,828
Hello.
561
00:36:16,830 --> 00:36:18,670
Hello. Is that Linda?
562
00:36:19,870 --> 00:36:21,588
It's Tony Kroesig here.
563
00:36:21,590 --> 00:36:23,428
Hello, Tony.
564
00:36:23,430 --> 00:36:25,028
Listen, will you come to lunch?
565
00:36:25,030 --> 00:36:27,148
Christchurch, next Thursday,
one o'clock?
566
00:36:27,150 --> 00:36:30,868
Oh, but...Fa doesn't let us alone
with young men unchaperoned.
567
00:36:30,870 --> 00:36:32,908
He doesn't really let us out,
full stop.
568
00:36:32,910 --> 00:36:34,908
Really?
HE LAUGHS
569
00:36:34,910 --> 00:36:36,828
You seem too old
for that sort of restriction.
570
00:36:36,830 --> 00:36:39,548
Um... Bring your cousin if you like.
571
00:36:39,550 --> 00:36:41,388
All right!
572
00:36:41,390 --> 00:36:43,268
That'd be lovely.
SHE MOUTHS
573
00:36:43,270 --> 00:36:45,028
Bye. Goodbye.
574
00:36:45,030 --> 00:36:48,268
You can't go, because Matthew
will throttle you.
575
00:36:48,270 --> 00:36:50,348
I will actually die if I don't go,
576
00:36:50,350 --> 00:36:52,350
so, you see,
I'd be dead either way.
577
00:36:54,270 --> 00:36:56,668
We have to escape
the fortress, Fanny.
578
00:36:56,670 --> 00:36:59,948
There was only one way
we could devise to escape,
579
00:36:59,950 --> 00:37:01,268
and it was full of risk.
580
00:37:01,270 --> 00:37:03,868
A very dull girl of exactly our age
581
00:37:03,870 --> 00:37:05,508
called Lavender Davis
582
00:37:05,510 --> 00:37:09,108
lived with her very dull parents
about five miles away.
583
00:37:09,110 --> 00:37:12,628
Once in a blue moon, Linda,
complaining vociferously,
584
00:37:12,630 --> 00:37:15,508
was sent over to
luncheon with them,
585
00:37:15,510 --> 00:37:17,430
driving herself in
Sadie's little car.
586
00:37:20,390 --> 00:37:22,828
Why are you two dressed up
for breakfast?
587
00:37:22,830 --> 00:37:25,308
Lavender Davis wants us
to go over to lunch there.
588
00:37:25,310 --> 00:37:27,668
Oh, duck, you can't have
the car, I'm afraid.
589
00:37:27,670 --> 00:37:29,228
Perkins is going to wash it.
590
00:37:29,230 --> 00:37:31,708
But, Mummy, you don't...
you don't understand.
591
00:37:31,710 --> 00:37:35,348
The whole point is that a man's
coming who brought up a baby badger.
592
00:37:35,350 --> 00:37:37,148
And I do so want to meet him.
593
00:37:37,150 --> 00:37:39,428
When we go to London
for the season,
594
00:37:39,430 --> 00:37:41,868
you'll barely have
time for a badger.
595
00:37:41,870 --> 00:37:45,988
Badgers are nocturnal anyway,
so you wouldn't even see it.
596
00:37:45,990 --> 00:37:47,468
Good point...
597
00:37:47,470 --> 00:37:51,348
Darling Jassy, lend me
your running-away money.
598
00:37:51,350 --> 00:37:53,388
What? No.
599
00:37:53,390 --> 00:37:56,548
I've saved and scraped
ever since I was seven
600
00:37:56,550 --> 00:37:58,548
for when I plan to
run away myself.
601
00:37:58,550 --> 00:38:01,068
I've no education or training,
so I'll need every penny.
602
00:38:01,070 --> 00:38:04,148
Just enough for a couple of
train tickets to Oxford.
603
00:38:04,150 --> 00:38:06,308
Darling, I'll give it all back.
604
00:38:06,310 --> 00:38:07,628
Tony will.
605
00:38:07,630 --> 00:38:08,870
I know men.
606
00:38:10,030 --> 00:38:11,508
Who has a badger?
607
00:38:11,510 --> 00:38:13,308
Last time,
you said you didn't mind
608
00:38:13,310 --> 00:38:15,668
if you never saw the Davises
again in your whole life!
609
00:38:15,670 --> 00:38:17,268
Oh, dear.
610
00:38:17,270 --> 00:38:19,988
You said you wanted to bash
Lavender Davis's face in
611
00:38:19,990 --> 00:38:21,028
with a mallet.
612
00:38:21,030 --> 00:38:22,708
AUNT SADIE:
Yes, she did say that.
613
00:38:22,710 --> 00:38:24,508
Come on, Fanny. Let's go!
614
00:38:24,510 --> 00:38:27,628
It's barely nine o'clock
in the morning! Girls!
615
00:38:27,630 --> 00:38:29,548
BOTH GIGGLE
616
00:38:29,550 --> 00:38:31,630
MUSIC: Deceptacon by Le Tigre
617
00:38:39,110 --> 00:38:40,830
# Every day and night
618
00:38:42,230 --> 00:38:45,108
# Every day and night
619
00:38:45,110 --> 00:38:48,308
# I can see your disco disco dick
620
00:38:48,310 --> 00:38:51,028
# Is sucking my heart out of my mind
621
00:38:51,030 --> 00:38:53,748
# I'm outta time,
I'm outta fucking time
622
00:38:53,750 --> 00:38:56,988
# I'm a gasoline gut with
a vaseline mind
623
00:38:56,990 --> 00:38:58,950
# Wanna disco?
Wanna see me disco...? #
624
00:39:00,390 --> 00:39:02,628
BOTH SHRIEK
625
00:39:02,630 --> 00:39:06,148
# One, two, three, four
626
00:39:06,150 --> 00:39:08,508
# You got what you been asking for
627
00:39:08,510 --> 00:39:10,148
# You're so policy free and
628
00:39:10,150 --> 00:39:12,748
# Your fantasy wheels
and everything you think
629
00:39:12,750 --> 00:39:14,388
# And everything you feel
630
00:39:14,390 --> 00:39:17,748
# Is all right, all right,
all right, all... #
631
00:39:17,750 --> 00:39:19,628
BELL RINGS
632
00:39:19,630 --> 00:39:22,390
WHISPERS: They're so serious.
It's like church.
633
00:39:23,910 --> 00:39:25,908
Do you think that we
would be as clever?
634
00:39:25,910 --> 00:39:27,790
If you evened it all out, I mean.
635
00:39:28,870 --> 00:39:30,948
MAN CALLS OUT: Bath time!
636
00:39:30,950 --> 00:39:33,070
ALL SHOUT AND CHEER
637
00:39:39,950 --> 00:39:42,308
Last one in's a sissy!
638
00:39:42,310 --> 00:39:44,388
CHEERING AND SPLASHING
639
00:39:44,390 --> 00:39:46,708
We must keep our ends up, Fanny.
640
00:39:46,710 --> 00:39:48,710
I think I'm happy with my end down.
641
00:39:51,430 --> 00:39:53,710
WOMEN GIGGLE
642
00:39:57,630 --> 00:39:59,470
LINDA GASPS
643
00:40:06,110 --> 00:40:08,508
Come on, let's do it.
We'd look so chic.
644
00:40:08,510 --> 00:40:10,590
MEN CHANT
645
00:40:12,550 --> 00:40:14,948
FANNY: Davey says it's deadly
to talk about hunting.
646
00:40:14,950 --> 00:40:17,510
LINDA: Of course I won't!
They're intellectuals.
647
00:40:19,390 --> 00:40:20,548
Hello.
648
00:40:20,550 --> 00:40:21,910
Been hunting at all?
649
00:40:23,870 --> 00:40:26,188
Yes, actually.
We were out yesterday.
650
00:40:26,190 --> 00:40:28,148
Good day? Great.
651
00:40:28,150 --> 00:40:29,908
Actually very.
652
00:40:29,910 --> 00:40:33,910
We found at once and we had a
five-mile point and then we...
653
00:40:35,110 --> 00:40:37,228
That's marvellous. Yes!
654
00:40:37,230 --> 00:40:39,388
Yeah. Well, we had a good
day yesterday too.
655
00:40:39,390 --> 00:40:41,588
Then my first horse went lame.
656
00:40:41,590 --> 00:40:43,748
Terrible shame. Ah, no.
657
00:40:43,750 --> 00:40:46,788
He'd been looking
awfully good all year.
658
00:40:46,790 --> 00:40:48,868
Come on! Mm!
659
00:40:48,870 --> 00:40:50,228
Here they are!
660
00:40:50,230 --> 00:40:52,988
About time! I said one o'clock,
not five past.
661
00:40:52,990 --> 00:40:55,030
ALL TALK AT ONCE
662
00:40:56,870 --> 00:41:00,028
TONY: Go and have some of that
cheese. Mummy sent this up.
663
00:41:00,030 --> 00:41:03,228
SWING MUSIC PLAYS
664
00:41:03,230 --> 00:41:05,108
Talk to that man.
665
00:41:05,110 --> 00:41:06,868
Say something clever.
666
00:41:06,870 --> 00:41:08,468
LINDA GIGGLES
667
00:41:08,470 --> 00:41:09,828
Oh...
668
00:41:09,830 --> 00:41:11,868
Hello! Hello.
669
00:41:11,870 --> 00:41:14,788
I'm a big fan
of Virginia Woolf.
670
00:41:14,790 --> 00:41:17,268
Have you read Orlando? You look
rather like The Bolter.
671
00:41:17,270 --> 00:41:19,748
A sort of Home Counties version.
672
00:41:19,750 --> 00:41:21,230
That's my mother.
673
00:41:22,430 --> 00:41:23,868
I shouldn't think so.
674
00:41:23,870 --> 00:41:26,108
You're much too old to be
a child of The Bolter.
675
00:41:26,110 --> 00:41:28,868
Is she still with
her white hunter?
676
00:41:28,870 --> 00:41:32,828
What's all that hair
on your nose?
677
00:41:32,830 --> 00:41:34,988
LAUGHS
678
00:41:34,990 --> 00:41:37,108
Oh, my goodness.
Fanny, is there a hair...?
679
00:41:37,110 --> 00:41:39,230
BLOWS
680
00:41:49,790 --> 00:41:51,308
Yes!
681
00:41:51,310 --> 00:41:53,348
You got away lightly.
682
00:41:53,350 --> 00:41:55,228
CHEERING
683
00:41:55,230 --> 00:41:56,828
To the King.
684
00:41:56,830 --> 00:41:59,348
OTHERS CHEER AND LAUGH
685
00:41:59,350 --> 00:42:00,908
Drink it all!
686
00:42:00,910 --> 00:42:03,548
Oh... Two! Whoo!
687
00:42:03,550 --> 00:42:05,750
This isn't really enjoyable.
688
00:42:07,150 --> 00:42:09,268
CHEERING
689
00:42:09,270 --> 00:42:11,348
A ghastly feeling of guilt is
beginning to give me
690
00:42:11,350 --> 00:42:13,068
a pain rather like indigestion.
691
00:42:13,070 --> 00:42:15,548
Yes, me too. Every time
the door opens,
692
00:42:15,550 --> 00:42:18,188
I'm sure Uncle Matthew's going
to be there cracking his whip.
693
00:42:18,190 --> 00:42:19,668
OK...
694
00:42:19,670 --> 00:42:21,708
CHEERING
695
00:42:21,710 --> 00:42:23,508
I think we'd better go.
696
00:42:23,510 --> 00:42:24,750
Yes.
697
00:42:26,670 --> 00:42:28,468
TONY GUFFAWS
698
00:42:28,470 --> 00:42:30,308
Shall...shall we?
Yes, I know.
699
00:42:30,310 --> 00:42:31,710
TONY: Come on, baby.
700
00:42:32,750 --> 00:42:34,948
Going to go? Yes.
701
00:42:34,950 --> 00:42:37,228
LINDA SOBS
FANNY: Oh, shush now.
702
00:42:37,230 --> 00:42:38,668
You poor darling.
703
00:42:38,670 --> 00:42:41,908
But you know that you have to
kiss a lot of frogs
704
00:42:41,910 --> 00:42:43,868
before you find your prince...
705
00:42:43,870 --> 00:42:45,828
..of Wales!
706
00:42:45,830 --> 00:42:47,870
SOBBING CONTINUES
707
00:42:49,870 --> 00:42:51,508
Oh, Fanny...
708
00:42:51,510 --> 00:42:53,270
Fanny, help.
709
00:42:54,990 --> 00:42:59,750
Love has increased threefold
in one short day.
710
00:43:02,510 --> 00:43:04,188
But why?
711
00:43:04,190 --> 00:43:06,508
SOBBING: I love him!
712
00:43:06,510 --> 00:43:07,910
Oh, Linda, why?
713
00:43:10,190 --> 00:43:12,670
Linda! Linda!
714
00:43:14,790 --> 00:43:16,950
UNCLE MATTHEW: Linda!
715
00:43:18,830 --> 00:43:20,350
Linda!
716
00:43:38,430 --> 00:43:41,030
I have received a phone call...
717
00:43:47,030 --> 00:43:48,510
..telling me...
718
00:43:49,830 --> 00:43:51,748
..that someone has left a scarf
719
00:43:51,750 --> 00:43:54,790
in Tony Kroesig's rooms at Oxford.
720
00:43:59,750 --> 00:44:02,710
Now we know -
you're not to be trusted.
721
00:44:04,110 --> 00:44:05,988
So we'll have to take
certain steps.
722
00:44:05,990 --> 00:44:07,708
Fanny, you will go
straight home.
723
00:44:07,710 --> 00:44:10,708
Emily can...try to control you
in the future, if she can.
724
00:44:10,710 --> 00:44:12,988
But you'll go the same way
as your mother The Bolter,
725
00:44:12,990 --> 00:44:14,468
as sure as eggs is eggs.
726
00:44:14,470 --> 00:44:17,708
Fa, you can't keep us locked up
forever - we're practically
middle-aged women!
727
00:44:17,710 --> 00:44:20,028
Don't interrupt your father.
Fanny is a scarlet woman -
728
00:44:20,030 --> 00:44:22,388
that's what we'd have
called her in the old days.
729
00:44:22,390 --> 00:44:24,788
I didn't even want to go.
And as for you, miss!
730
00:44:24,790 --> 00:44:26,988
You're worse, worse than
The Bolter, imagine that!
731
00:44:26,990 --> 00:44:28,668
Please stop it
about The Bolter.
732
00:44:28,670 --> 00:44:30,388
No-one here is like her.
It's all unfair
733
00:44:30,390 --> 00:44:34,148
because I always feel like I'm the
terrible person, and then Linda
always seems so innocent.
734
00:44:34,150 --> 00:44:36,588
I blame that depraved sewer Merlin.
735
00:44:36,590 --> 00:44:38,148
LINDA: Merlin's not depraved!
736
00:44:38,150 --> 00:44:41,668
He travels abroad and reads books
and is sophisticated.
737
00:44:41,670 --> 00:44:44,108
Travels abroad?
Yes, and his house
738
00:44:44,110 --> 00:44:45,948
is beautiful and comfortable
and warm,
739
00:44:45,950 --> 00:44:48,508
a place to live in, and not
some freezing medieval fortress
740
00:44:48,510 --> 00:44:50,388
to rush out from
and kill things all day.
741
00:44:50,390 --> 00:44:52,868
I can't sit in a cupboard
with Fanny for the rest of my life!
742
00:44:52,870 --> 00:44:55,708
Well, you won't have to, cos Fanny's
never coming back here again!
743
00:44:55,710 --> 00:44:58,548
And there can be no question of a
London season now. Fa, please! No!
744
00:44:58,550 --> 00:45:00,948
We shall have to watch you every
minute of the day in future.
745
00:45:00,950 --> 00:45:03,590
You're damn lucky
not to get a thrashing.
746
00:45:04,630 --> 00:45:06,508
Now go to your rooms, both of you.
747
00:45:06,510 --> 00:45:09,708
And you're not to speak
to each other before Fanny leaves!
748
00:45:09,710 --> 00:45:11,988
Luckily, no-one will give them
a second glance now
749
00:45:11,990 --> 00:45:13,550
with that dreadful hair.
750
00:45:25,590 --> 00:45:28,188
Goodbye, Fanny! Goodbye!
751
00:45:28,190 --> 00:45:29,590
Goodbye, Linda.
752
00:45:30,990 --> 00:45:32,868
Oh, we are unlucky to be us!
753
00:45:32,870 --> 00:45:34,668
Bye, darling!
754
00:45:34,670 --> 00:45:37,230
FANNY: Of course,
we were allowed a London season.
755
00:45:41,750 --> 00:45:43,868
# Give my love to London
756
00:45:43,870 --> 00:45:46,468
# Say I'll be there soon
757
00:45:46,470 --> 00:45:49,028
# Meet me in Piccadilly
758
00:45:49,030 --> 00:45:51,268
# And we'll dance by the light
of the moon... #
759
00:45:51,270 --> 00:45:54,308
FANNY: The English upper-class
version of the puberty ritual
760
00:45:54,310 --> 00:45:55,948
finally happened.
761
00:45:55,950 --> 00:45:58,268
Isn't it lovely to be lovely us?
762
00:45:58,270 --> 00:46:00,228
We came out into the world -
763
00:46:00,230 --> 00:46:03,708
18 years old
and ready for a husband.
764
00:46:03,710 --> 00:46:05,668
Do you get up to Scotland much?
765
00:46:05,670 --> 00:46:07,348
Care for nightclubs?
766
00:46:07,350 --> 00:46:10,268
I say, have you come far?
767
00:46:10,270 --> 00:46:12,548
We met last night
at William Stonor's.
768
00:46:12,550 --> 00:46:13,828
Don't you remember?
769
00:46:13,830 --> 00:46:15,388
No.
770
00:46:15,390 --> 00:46:16,910
Uh...
771
00:46:19,270 --> 00:46:22,748
FANNY: But Linda was still
in her dream of love for Tony.
772
00:46:22,750 --> 00:46:25,750
And Tony was nowhere to be seen.
773
00:46:27,750 --> 00:46:29,310
Oh, what's the point?
774
00:46:30,670 --> 00:46:32,790
I missed my only chance
for happiness.
775
00:46:34,630 --> 00:46:36,308
I'm going to be a sour,
776
00:46:36,310 --> 00:46:39,788
wizened up, toothless old maid
777
00:46:39,790 --> 00:46:43,108
and die in a hole.
778
00:46:43,110 --> 00:46:45,188
Me too.
779
00:46:45,190 --> 00:46:47,430
We'll have each other
to dribble on at least.
780
00:47:00,270 --> 00:47:01,868
Hello, Linda.
781
00:47:01,870 --> 00:47:03,908
I've been looking
everywhere for you.
782
00:47:03,910 --> 00:47:05,468
Really?
783
00:47:05,470 --> 00:47:07,468
Shall I show you the balcony?
784
00:47:07,470 --> 00:47:09,150
Yes.
785
00:47:26,070 --> 00:47:28,308
THE BOLTER: Hello, darling!
786
00:47:28,310 --> 00:47:30,628
You've got so tall!
787
00:47:30,630 --> 00:47:31,988
Hello, Bolter.
788
00:47:31,990 --> 00:47:33,588
Mummy.
789
00:47:33,590 --> 00:47:35,470
I'm your mummy!
790
00:47:37,430 --> 00:47:39,948
Was that Linda
I just saw you with?
791
00:47:39,950 --> 00:47:41,348
Yes.
792
00:47:41,350 --> 00:47:43,708
Oh, no, it's such a mistake
to be friends with girls
793
00:47:43,710 --> 00:47:45,628
who are more beautiful
than one is, darling.
794
00:47:45,630 --> 00:47:47,868
It's too dispiriting.
Who was she with?
795
00:47:47,870 --> 00:47:49,468
Tony Kroesig.
796
00:47:49,470 --> 00:47:51,148
Tony?! Oh.
797
00:47:51,150 --> 00:47:52,510
That won't last.
798
00:47:56,070 --> 00:47:58,988
I want you to meet my friend, Colin.
799
00:47:58,990 --> 00:48:00,668
He's so nice!
800
00:48:00,670 --> 00:48:02,668
He's here somewhere.
801
00:48:02,670 --> 00:48:04,508
What happened to your white hunter?
802
00:48:04,510 --> 00:48:08,510
Dead. Shot in the head
during a safari - too sad.
803
00:48:10,190 --> 00:48:12,228
Oh, well, at least
you didn't have to bolt.
804
00:48:12,230 --> 00:48:13,908
LAUGHS
805
00:48:13,910 --> 00:48:16,868
Yeah, no. Yes, for once!
LAUGHS
806
00:48:16,870 --> 00:48:19,710
First one I lost respectably -
to death.
807
00:48:20,750 --> 00:48:24,630
Oh, Fanny, dear, you're very funny.
808
00:48:26,030 --> 00:48:29,350
I'm going to go and fetch
lovely Colin for you to meet.
809
00:48:36,150 --> 00:48:40,068
# D'ye ken John Peel
with his coat so gay?
810
00:48:40,070 --> 00:48:43,828
# D'ye ken John Peel
at the break o' the day
811
00:48:43,830 --> 00:48:46,428
# D'ye ken John Peel
when he's far, far away... #
812
00:48:46,430 --> 00:48:49,428
Oh, darling Colin,
everything about you is heaven.
813
00:48:49,430 --> 00:48:51,348
I just want to spend
the whole night with you!
814
00:48:51,350 --> 00:48:52,708
Goodness, let's!
815
00:48:52,710 --> 00:48:54,508
# For the sound of his horn... #
816
00:48:54,510 --> 00:48:55,828
Come, let's get out of here.
817
00:48:55,830 --> 00:48:59,188
# And the cry of his hounds
which he oft times led
818
00:48:59,190 --> 00:49:02,628
# Peel's "View, Halloo!"
could awaken the dead
819
00:49:02,630 --> 00:49:06,588
# Or the fox from his lair
in the morning
820
00:49:06,590 --> 00:49:10,268
# Yes, I ken John Peel and Ruby too
821
00:49:10,270 --> 00:49:13,668
# Ranter and Royal
and Bellman so true
822
00:49:13,670 --> 00:49:15,748
# From the drag to the chase
823
00:49:15,750 --> 00:49:17,908
# From the chase to the view
824
00:49:17,910 --> 00:49:21,230
# From a view to the death
in the morning. #
825
00:49:28,070 --> 00:49:29,910
GIGGLES SOFTLY
826
00:49:31,310 --> 00:49:33,990
TENDERLY:
"Darling, I'm your mummy."
827
00:49:41,190 --> 00:49:42,990
CARELESSLY:
"Darling, I'm your mummy."
828
00:49:52,790 --> 00:49:54,668
LINDA YAWNS
829
00:49:54,670 --> 00:49:58,308
UNCLE MATTHEW: That bloody Hun
Kroesig has just telephoned.
830
00:49:58,310 --> 00:50:00,868
He wanted to speak to you, Linda.
831
00:50:00,870 --> 00:50:02,668
I told him to get
the hell out of here -
832
00:50:02,670 --> 00:50:04,708
I don't want you mixed up
with any Germans,
833
00:50:04,710 --> 00:50:05,870
do you understand?
834
00:50:07,310 --> 00:50:08,910
Well, I am "mixed up".
835
00:50:11,470 --> 00:50:13,628
As it happens,
I'm engaged to him.
836
00:50:13,630 --> 00:50:15,428
GASPS
837
00:50:15,430 --> 00:50:17,550
FOOTSTEPS APPROACH
838
00:50:20,710 --> 00:50:22,668
What did you...? Come here!
839
00:50:22,670 --> 00:50:24,588
What did you...?
Come here, you!
840
00:50:24,590 --> 00:50:25,950
Come here!
841
00:50:27,990 --> 00:50:29,428
What did you say?
842
00:50:29,430 --> 00:50:32,030
How dare you! What did you say?
843
00:50:33,990 --> 00:50:36,788
What are you doing?
She just said she's engaged!
844
00:50:36,790 --> 00:50:38,750
PANTING
845
00:50:55,750 --> 00:50:58,590
FANNY: It wasn't just Uncle Matthew
who opposed the engagement.
846
00:50:59,910 --> 00:51:04,028
Tony is Bottom
to Linda's Titania, isn't he?
847
00:51:04,030 --> 00:51:05,828
DAVEY: He's ghastly.
848
00:51:05,830 --> 00:51:07,988
A frightful Counter Hon.
849
00:51:07,990 --> 00:51:10,188
Nothing will wake her up.
850
00:51:10,190 --> 00:51:13,028
No. Not before it's too late.
851
00:51:13,030 --> 00:51:14,750
Poor Linda.
852
00:51:15,790 --> 00:51:18,348
She has an intensely
romantic character,
853
00:51:18,350 --> 00:51:19,710
which is fatal for a woman.
854
00:51:21,390 --> 00:51:24,070
And also what makes her
so completely irresistible.
855
00:51:25,510 --> 00:51:28,308
Fortunately, most women
are madly matter-of-fact.
856
00:51:28,310 --> 00:51:30,550
Otherwise, the world
could hardly carry on.
857
00:51:32,430 --> 00:51:34,150
What am I, Davey?
858
00:51:36,510 --> 00:51:37,950
You're you, Fanny.
859
00:51:39,950 --> 00:51:41,190
You'll be all right.
860
00:51:42,550 --> 00:51:44,030
Hm.
861
00:51:45,350 --> 00:51:47,748
Lord Merlin was braver
than the rest of us.
862
00:51:47,750 --> 00:51:50,028
Are you pleased about my engagement?
No, of course not.
863
00:51:50,030 --> 00:51:51,870
Why are you doing it?
864
00:51:52,910 --> 00:51:54,508
STAMMERS: We're in love.
865
00:51:54,510 --> 00:51:55,908
And what makes you think so?
866
00:51:55,910 --> 00:51:59,028
STAMMERS: One doesn't think,
one knows.
867
00:51:59,030 --> 00:52:00,750
Oh, fiddlesticks!
868
00:52:05,710 --> 00:52:07,428
Well!
869
00:52:07,430 --> 00:52:11,228
You evidently don't
understand a thing about love.
870
00:52:11,230 --> 00:52:14,308
So what's the use
in talking to you?
871
00:52:14,310 --> 00:52:18,028
Love is for grown-ups,
as you'll discover one day.
872
00:52:18,030 --> 00:52:19,108
You'll also discover
873
00:52:19,110 --> 00:52:20,908
that it's got nothing to do
with marriage.
874
00:52:20,910 --> 00:52:23,588
I'm all in favour
of you marrying, if you so wish,
875
00:52:23,590 --> 00:52:28,468
but for God's sake, not to a bore
like Tony Kroesig!
876
00:52:28,470 --> 00:52:30,028
He's your friend.
877
00:52:30,030 --> 00:52:32,228
If he's such a bore, why would
you bring him to my party?
878
00:52:32,230 --> 00:52:34,428
I can't guess that you'll go
and marry every stopgap
879
00:52:34,430 --> 00:52:35,910
that comes to stay at my house!
880
00:52:37,310 --> 00:52:39,510
GASPS
881
00:52:45,270 --> 00:52:46,668
LOO PAPER RUSTLES
882
00:52:46,670 --> 00:52:48,908
LOO FLUSHES
883
00:52:48,910 --> 00:52:52,308
LINDA: Can't think why Merlin
says he's such a bore.
884
00:52:52,310 --> 00:52:53,670
Tony knows everything.
885
00:52:55,710 --> 00:52:58,748
Well, yes, that's exactly
it, he does.
886
00:52:58,750 --> 00:53:01,110
At least he thinks he does.
887
00:53:09,390 --> 00:53:11,430
LOO FLUSHES
888
00:53:13,750 --> 00:53:14,988
Oh, bother Merlin.
889
00:53:14,990 --> 00:53:16,468
You know, I'm starting to think
890
00:53:16,470 --> 00:53:19,028
that Fa was right about
him all along.
891
00:53:19,030 --> 00:53:21,110
He is a little depraved.
892
00:53:24,470 --> 00:53:25,750
Don't you think?
893
00:53:31,030 --> 00:53:32,430
EXCLAIMS
894
00:53:39,190 --> 00:53:41,750
I'm afraid I have to make Lavender
Davis chief bridesmaid.
895
00:53:44,270 --> 00:53:45,670
But you'll be second.
896
00:53:47,150 --> 00:53:48,510
She's Tony's cousin.
897
00:53:49,710 --> 00:53:52,988
And she is responsible for us
getting together, after all.
898
00:53:52,990 --> 00:53:55,188
Well, only most unwittingly.
899
00:53:55,190 --> 00:53:58,110
Unwittingly or wittingly,
what does it matter?
900
00:54:20,150 --> 00:54:21,350
CLEARS THROAT
901
00:54:22,510 --> 00:54:24,508
Um...
902
00:54:24,510 --> 00:54:26,228
Would you take my flowers
for me?
903
00:54:26,230 --> 00:54:29,590
Take my flowers for me,
would you? Oh!
904
00:54:31,710 --> 00:54:34,228
Oh, hello, Fanny, darling.
Come and have a champagne!
905
00:54:34,230 --> 00:54:35,348
Oh, I'm so sorry!
906
00:54:35,350 --> 00:54:38,350
Excuse me. Sorry.
No, I'm sorry. Excuse me.
907
00:54:43,470 --> 00:54:44,748
This... There you are.
908
00:54:44,750 --> 00:54:47,510
Yes, thank you.
That's all right. I...
909
00:54:48,550 --> 00:54:51,188
Are you one of those
bright young things?
910
00:54:51,190 --> 00:54:53,508
Oh, I don't know.
Would you like me to be?
911
00:54:53,510 --> 00:54:54,550
Not particularly.
912
00:54:57,550 --> 00:54:59,748
So, uh... Fanny!
913
00:54:59,750 --> 00:55:01,428
Yes? Let's talk about...
914
00:55:01,430 --> 00:55:03,428
GUEST: It's time,
everyone's sitting down.
915
00:55:03,430 --> 00:55:04,668
CLEARS THROAT
916
00:55:04,670 --> 00:55:06,948
Yes, can we just, um, chat, Fanny?
917
00:55:06,950 --> 00:55:09,348
Well, we will later - you have
to say hello to everyone.
918
00:55:09,350 --> 00:55:11,270
GROANS
919
00:55:13,070 --> 00:55:14,150
Come on!
920
00:55:16,550 --> 00:55:17,990
Get in!
921
00:55:22,310 --> 00:55:24,828
Well... What do you think?
922
00:55:24,830 --> 00:55:26,668
It's better than Louisa's,
isn't it?
923
00:55:26,670 --> 00:55:29,068
There's that at least. TONY: I say,
has anyone seen Linda?
924
00:55:29,070 --> 00:55:30,870
Shh, shh, shh!
I need to start my speech.
925
00:55:32,790 --> 00:55:35,828
Darling, you'd better get out
and be the bride. I know, I know.
926
00:55:35,830 --> 00:55:37,908
Can we just stay
for a second longer
927
00:55:37,910 --> 00:55:40,428
and just...chat and catch up?
928
00:55:40,430 --> 00:55:41,908
Your train's poking out -
929
00:55:41,910 --> 00:55:45,108
it's going to be quite obvious
you're in here. Darling,
930
00:55:45,110 --> 00:55:47,830
in my bitter determination
to grow up...
931
00:55:49,590 --> 00:55:52,828
..I'd forgotten we'd have
to stop being children.
932
00:55:52,830 --> 00:55:54,068
Yes, there is that.
933
00:55:54,070 --> 00:55:56,548
Can we still be toothless
old maids together?
934
00:55:56,550 --> 00:55:58,388
Not really -
you just got married!
935
00:55:58,390 --> 00:55:59,670
LAUGHS NERVOUSLY
936
00:56:01,110 --> 00:56:02,870
Oh, dear. I'm feeling a bit lost.
937
00:56:04,190 --> 00:56:05,348
Oh.
938
00:56:05,350 --> 00:56:07,788
Are there really
to be no more Christmases
939
00:56:07,790 --> 00:56:09,188
at Alconleigh?
940
00:56:09,190 --> 00:56:10,510
AUNT SADIE: Linda!
941
00:56:16,230 --> 00:56:18,910
Get out of there at once!
942
00:56:19,870 --> 00:56:21,390
Tony's about to make his speech.
943
00:57:01,670 --> 00:57:04,630
Ah, there she is.
Speak of the devil.
944
00:57:07,710 --> 00:57:09,228
Come on, girl, get over here.
945
00:57:09,230 --> 00:57:11,428
# My baby loves me
946
00:57:11,430 --> 00:57:13,068
# I'm so happy
947
00:57:13,070 --> 00:57:16,428
# Happy makes me a modern girl
948
00:57:16,430 --> 00:57:18,668
# Took my money
949
00:57:18,670 --> 00:57:20,510
# And bought a TV... #
WHISPERS: Go on.
950
00:57:22,230 --> 00:57:24,150
WHISPERS: I love you.
951
00:57:25,190 --> 00:57:28,388
Er, when I first met Linda,
952
00:57:28,390 --> 00:57:31,588
she told me she was
an Honourable,
953
00:57:31,590 --> 00:57:33,388
the daughter of a baron,
954
00:57:33,390 --> 00:57:35,110
spoke fluent French...
955
00:57:39,110 --> 00:57:41,630
..and rode to hounds
with the Bicester.
956
00:57:47,630 --> 00:57:49,588
And I knew, right off the bat,
957
00:57:49,590 --> 00:57:51,308
she was hellbent on marrying me.
958
00:57:51,310 --> 00:57:53,508
TRICKLE OF LAUGHTER
959
00:57:53,510 --> 00:57:55,988
Despite all that, I still
managed to fall for her!
960
00:57:55,990 --> 00:57:57,788
LAUGHTER
961
00:57:57,790 --> 00:58:00,108
Erm, you see, I think what...
962
00:58:00,110 --> 00:58:03,828
..what sealed the deal,
as we say in banking...
963
00:58:03,830 --> 00:58:06,548
VOICE FADES
964
00:58:06,550 --> 00:58:08,468
# I'm so happy
965
00:58:08,470 --> 00:58:10,188
# Happy makes me
966
00:58:10,190 --> 00:58:11,948
# A modern girl
967
00:58:11,950 --> 00:58:13,708
# Took my money
968
00:58:13,710 --> 00:58:16,148
# And bought a doughnut
969
00:58:16,150 --> 00:58:19,268
# The hole's the size of
this entire world
970
00:58:19,270 --> 00:58:23,388
# My whole life
971
00:58:23,390 --> 00:58:26,708
# Was like a picture of a sunny day
972
00:58:26,710 --> 00:58:30,468
# My whole life
973
00:58:30,470 --> 00:58:34,270
# Looked like the picture
of a sunny day
974
00:58:49,150 --> 00:58:51,068
# My baby loves me
975
00:58:51,070 --> 00:58:53,148
# I'm so angry
976
00:58:53,150 --> 00:58:56,508
# Anger makes me a modern girl
977
00:58:56,510 --> 00:58:58,388
# Took my money
978
00:58:58,390 --> 00:59:00,548
# I couldn't buy nothin'
979
00:59:00,550 --> 00:59:04,108
# I'm sick of this brave new world
980
00:59:04,110 --> 00:59:07,748
# My whole life
981
00:59:07,750 --> 00:59:11,348
# Was like the picture
of a sunny day
982
00:59:11,350 --> 00:59:15,028
# My whole life
983
00:59:15,030 --> 00:59:17,830
# Looked like the picture
of a sunny day. #113985
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
