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1
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Xena?
2
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'you Dexon?
3
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You lookin' to die?
4
00:00:33,485 --> 00:00:35,560
What is this? Some kind of a trick?
5
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I come in peace.
6
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Right-- and I'm Cupid-- spreading love wherever I go.
7
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What do you really want?
8
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To see you give up your warrior ways.
9
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The violence that you thrive on is a disease,Dexon.
10
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It grows inside you. And it wobs you of your humanity.
11
00:00:56,852 --> 00:00:58,761
You say that like it's a bad thing.
12
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It is-- but it doesn't have to be that way.
13
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We can put aside our differences.
14
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We can bury our weapons.
15
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We can learn to live together in peace.
16
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I'm willing to do whatever it takes-- to sacrifice everything.
17
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You've got a knife stashed under that breastplate.
18
00:01:19,554 --> 00:01:23,749
Dexon-- maybe this will convince you to trust me.
19
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Look at me, Dexon.
20
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See me as I truly am-- not a warrior,
21
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but a champion of peace-- willing to die for it.
22
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I'm moved-- truly.
23
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I hardly know what to say, except-- grab her!
24
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Isn't that Xena?
25
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They're going to burn her at the stake!
26
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Have you lost your mind? What are you doing?
27
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These people are going to kill you.
28
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I am not afraid to die. Not if it is Hestia's will.
29
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Hestia? The virgin goddess?
30
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What does she have to do with the price of grapes in Carthage?
31
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She is my salvation. I do as she ordains.
32
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Since when?
33
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All right, boys-- light her up!
34
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Here-- catch!
35
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Hey!
36
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I get it.
37
00:02:57,501 --> 00:03:00,154
This is about me bugging you for more responsibility, isn't it?
38
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You wanna see if I can rescue you without your help. I can do that.
39
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Excuse me.
40
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Get the girl!
41
00:03:18,792 --> 00:03:22,138
Hey! Let me go! Son of a Bacchae!
42
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You happy now?! Of all the stubborn-- pig-headed-- !
43
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Hey! What do you think you're doing?!
44
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None of your business-- Tubby.
45
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That's right, I'm talking to you.
46
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Come here!
47
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Thanks.
48
00:04:34,749 --> 00:04:36,430
I guess you're not gonna help me with this,either
49
00:04:36,740 --> 00:04:39,272
Well-- if it is Hestia's will, uh--
50
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I'm not laughing!
51
00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:45,730
You're dead!
52
00:04:46,515 --> 00:04:48,326
It wasn't me; it was her!
53
00:04:50,950 --> 00:04:51,921
Stop them!
54
00:04:53,379 --> 00:04:54,358
Go!
55
00:04:58,378 --> 00:05:00,047
Come back here, you!
56
00:05:00,887 --> 00:05:03,095
Toward the left! Go! Hurry!
57
00:05:11,442 --> 00:05:12,569
They must've gone this way!
58
00:05:12,843 --> 00:05:15,333
You almost got us killed! What were you thinking?
59
00:05:15,754 --> 00:05:16,910
I'm on a mission.
60
00:05:17,171 --> 00:05:20,155
A mission? Well, you had _better_ fill me in.
61
00:05:20,155 --> 00:05:23,570
Because, this, this-- burning yourself
at the stake stuff is way over the top.
62
00:05:24,128 --> 00:05:24,766
Hey!
63
00:05:26,099 --> 00:05:27,770
You left your chakram at the square!
64
00:05:28,135 --> 00:05:29,567
Yeah, well, you're gonna have to get it!
65
00:05:30,587 --> 00:05:32,052
Unless you want me to do it.
66
00:05:33,276 --> 00:05:35,335
My child, you seem a little troubled.
67
00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:38,648
'Troubled' is a polite word for what I am!
68
00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:47,430
Callisto-- you've come back somehow, to drive me insane!
69
00:05:49,994 --> 00:05:52,850
Pr-- Princess Diana-- I, I should have known,
70
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I-- . Meg?
71
00:05:59,416 --> 00:06:06,090
You really had me going.
You're not Meg.
72
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Permit me to introduce myself.
73
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I am Leah-- head priestess of the temple of Hestia.
74
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You're kidding me, right?
75
00:06:14,889 --> 00:06:15,588
No.
76
00:06:15,588 --> 00:06:17,088
A Hestian virgin?
77
00:06:17,328 --> 00:06:19,119
Are there any other sort?
78
00:06:21,527 --> 00:06:23,431
This is almost too good.
79
00:07:30,638 --> 00:07:31,358
Hi, Xena.
80
00:07:31,998 --> 00:07:34,936
Hi. Sorry, I didn't catch up with you today.
81
00:07:34,936 --> 00:07:36,361
I ran into Zagreus near Corinth.
82
00:07:37,156 --> 00:07:38,352
Said he'd assembled a new army.
83
00:07:38,861 --> 00:07:41,205
Turns out to be an imaginary one worse than
84
00:07:43,944 --> 00:07:45,267
What are you grinning at?
85
00:07:45,798 --> 00:07:47,889
You see, I ran into someone in town.
86
00:07:47,889 --> 00:07:48,356
Mmm.
87
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Someone really, really interesting.
88
00:07:53,936 --> 00:07:56,060
At least, I think you'll find her interesting.
89
00:07:56,060 --> 00:07:57,400
Mm-hmm.
90
00:07:57,933 --> 00:08:00,716
Xena, for once, can you just-- just play along?
91
00:08:03,494 --> 00:08:06,402
All right. Gee, Gabrielle, who is it?
92
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I simply have to know.
93
00:08:07,839 --> 00:08:13,140
The suspense is killing-- Diana.
94
00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:14,695
Oh.
95
00:08:14,695 --> 00:08:15,552
Nope.
96
00:08:16,501 --> 00:08:17,117
Meg.
97
00:08:17,619 --> 00:08:18,319
Oh.
98
00:08:18,319 --> 00:08:23,711
That's wrong again. You give up? Xena, Warrior
99
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Princess, meet Leah-- the priestess-- the Hestian priestess.
100
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The Hestian virgin priestess.
101
00:08:39,543 --> 00:08:43,290
Ye gods on Mt. Olympus. It's a miracle.
102
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:46,650
Let's join hands and praise Hestia!
103
00:08:46,650 --> 00:08:53,259
Praise Hestia! Praise Hestia! Praise Hestia! Praise--
104
00:08:55,729 --> 00:08:58,871
So, you-- cast these stones, and they told you to confront Dexon.
105
00:08:59,124 --> 00:09:01,596
Oh, not just stones. Hestian stones,
106
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the voice of the goddess herself.
107
00:09:03,781 --> 00:09:05,103
What about that outfit?
108
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I found this vile garment in my chamber-- no offense.
109
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None taken.
110
00:09:11,483 --> 00:09:15,309
I took it as a sign from the goddess-- dress like a warrior
111
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to confwont a warrior.
112
00:09:18,543 --> 00:09:20,170
I had no idea I'd be mistaken for you.
113
00:09:20,494 --> 00:09:22,351
Then, you always listen to Hestia.
114
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Well, of course. It's not my place to question the wisdom of the goddess.
115
00:09:27,916 --> 00:09:30,324
We must all place our faith in Hestia.
116
00:09:35,199 --> 00:09:37,699
Do I sense a nonbeliever among us?
117
00:09:37,699 --> 00:09:40,950
I just think that you'd do better if you put more faith in yourself.
118
00:09:40,950 --> 00:09:44,761
Well-- looks like someone's caught a speeding chariot straight for Tartarus.
119
00:09:45,871 --> 00:09:47,541
What about you, Gabrielle? Hmm?
120
00:09:47,541 --> 00:09:50,088
Surely, you place more faith in the all-knowing,
121
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ever-powerful gods than you do in yourself.
122
00:09:53,358 --> 00:09:54,376
Yeah.
123
00:09:55,310 --> 00:09:57,405
Actually, I'm with Xena on this one.
124
00:09:57,661 --> 00:10:01,608
Ahh-- heathens to the left of me; infidels to the right.
125
00:10:02,356 --> 00:10:02,669
Huh.
126
00:10:02,669 --> 00:10:04,107
Tremendous. Next thing,
127
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you'll be telling me you're not virgins. Huuuuuh!
128
00:10:11,167 --> 00:10:12,519
Can I have a word with you?
129
00:10:15,533 --> 00:10:17,359
Excuse us, Priestess?
130
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Oh, yes, I think I'm in need of a little quiet reflection.
131
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Oh,
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Hestia.
133
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If denying the flesh is the path to true wighteousness,
134
00:10:30,263 --> 00:10:33,860
then what lessons can I learn from these wanton strumpets?
135
00:10:33,860 --> 00:10:36,295
You don't have to be a virgin to be virtuous.
136
00:10:36,655 --> 00:10:39,169
Oh, yes. You keep telling yourself that, Dear.
137
00:10:39,672 --> 00:10:41,067
Something is wrong, here.
138
00:10:42,333 --> 00:10:45,891
I'll say. I thought all Hestians
were sweet and kind and--
139
00:10:46,631 --> 00:10:50,733
Never mind that.
Someone is using Leah's blind devotion and me to do her harm.
140
00:10:51,455 --> 00:10:52,950
Maybe even to kill her.
141
00:10:55,390 --> 00:10:58,045
We should take her back where she belongs,
and get to the bottom of this.
142
00:10:58,045 --> 00:11:02,357
And how can I pass your wisdom on
to these women of questionable virtue--
143
00:11:02,357 --> 00:11:05,531
who so obviously disregard
the purity of their own bodies.
144
00:11:06,601 --> 00:11:08,192
I was married at the time.
145
00:11:08,673 --> 00:11:11,482
Yes, well, we all have our
little excuses, don't we?
146
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Were you?
147
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Virgins only.
148
00:11:35,221 --> 00:11:38,753
What is it, written on my forehead? Look, it's all right.
149
00:11:38,753 --> 00:11:40,970
My friend and I have brought back Priestess Leah.
150
00:11:41,212 --> 00:11:42,068
What are you talking about?
151
00:11:42,068 --> 00:11:43,476
The Priestess is right there.
152
00:11:43,878 --> 00:11:47,425
And now, the Priestess Leah will lead us all in a prayer.
153
00:11:51,003 --> 00:11:54,254
OK-- so let's kick off today's ceremony with a pawable.
154
00:11:54,810 --> 00:11:56,942
A centaur and a cyclops go into a bar.
155
00:11:56,942 --> 00:11:58,743
And the bartender says to the cyclops--
156
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Is there a problem, huh?
157
00:12:03,631 --> 00:12:06,592
Everyone is waiting here
to hear Hestia's divine message.
158
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The Hestian stones, your Eminence.
159
00:12:11,935 --> 00:12:15,687
Aw, well-- now we're talkin'. Come in, seven!
160
00:12:15,687 --> 00:12:17,068
Priestess needs new sandals.
161
00:12:18,717 --> 00:12:19,960
That's Meg.
162
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:22,009
Well, it sure ain't no virgin.
163
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I couldn't help overhearing.
164
00:12:23,899 --> 00:12:24,945
If you're looking for Meg,
165
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she owns a tavern down the road.
166
00:12:26,916 --> 00:12:28,375
Catch you there later?
167
00:12:28,375 --> 00:12:29,788
Don't count on it.
168
00:12:29,788 --> 00:12:30,906
OK, girls-- be honest.
169
00:12:31,298 --> 00:12:33,840
Who among us here, really is a virgin?
170
00:12:36,105 --> 00:12:37,424
Xena, what is she up to?
171
00:12:37,747 --> 00:12:39,584
I don't know, but I'm goin' to find out.
172
00:12:40,059 --> 00:12:41,186
Take Leah to that tavern.
173
00:12:41,186 --> 00:12:43,157
She'll be safe there if you disguise her as Meg.
174
00:12:43,372 --> 00:12:44,833
But, why would I need a disguise?
175
00:12:45,345 --> 00:12:47,576
A Hestian virgin is welcome everywhere.
176
00:12:50,222 --> 00:12:51,497
Wait, now, where are you going?
177
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To talk to an old friend.
178
00:12:56,658 --> 00:12:58,583
I knew there'd be something to drink around here.
179
00:13:06,514 --> 00:13:07,536
Hello, Meg.
180
00:13:08,035 --> 00:13:09,601
What are you doing here?
181
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I could ask you the same thing.
182
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You got some nerve, Priestess.
183
00:13:13,984 --> 00:13:17,015
Abandoning your flock just when they needed ya.
184
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And a woman of the cloth.
185
00:13:19,206 --> 00:13:21,723
Probably out sewing your wild oats.
186
00:13:22,267 --> 00:13:23,624
Ya make me sick.
187
00:13:24,078 --> 00:13:26,549
Go on, get outta here!
188
00:13:28,268 --> 00:13:30,425
You don't wanna be doing that, Meg.
189
00:13:33,423 --> 00:13:35,173
Oh-- so, the little virgin wants to play rough, huh? Eh?
190
00:13:35,173 --> 00:13:38,286
How'd you like a trip to Mt. Olympus, courtesy of my fist?!
191
00:13:44,168 --> 00:13:45,369
Hello, Xena.
192
00:13:45,369 --> 00:13:46,620
Hello, Meg.
193
00:13:51,401 --> 00:13:54,707
Oh, very well, I will play
the part of the wetched lush,Meg
194
00:13:54,707 --> 00:13:56,710
but I hardly think anyone will be fooled.
195
00:13:58,914 --> 00:14:00,039
Yes, they will.
196
00:14:10,196 --> 00:14:11,412
You really are a very nice, albeit
197
00:14:11,412 --> 00:14:13,790
misguided-- young person, Gabrielle.
198
00:14:14,444 --> 00:14:16,337
It's a great pity I didn't get 'hold of you sooner.
199
00:14:17,445 --> 00:14:19,224
You would've made an excellent Hestian.
200
00:14:20,405 --> 00:14:22,075
Thanks.
-I don't think so.
201
00:14:22,317 --> 00:14:23,853
Well, the chaste life's not so bad.
202
00:14:24,396 --> 00:14:25,543
Once you get used to it.
203
00:14:27,024 --> 00:14:28,678
You simply have to follow the Hestian rules.
204
00:14:29,148 --> 00:14:31,135
Rule 1-- know thyself.
205
00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:33,523
Rule 2--whatever--
206
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Believe me.
207
00:14:34,981 --> 00:14:38,960
If I have to go the rest of my life without
companionship, knowing myself won't be a problem.
208
00:14:40,804 --> 00:14:42,574
There you go-- you're done!
209
00:14:45,241 --> 00:14:47,585
Can you look-- sexy?
210
00:14:49,807 --> 00:14:50,982
Alluring?
211
00:14:51,806 --> 00:14:52,650
Oh.
212
00:14:57,524 --> 00:14:59,546
Do I capture her essence?
213
00:15:01,384 --> 00:15:02,585
Yeah.
214
00:15:04,538 --> 00:15:06,453
It's not going to be as hard as I thought.
215
00:15:12,044 --> 00:15:14,025
So, Balius comes to me with a sob story
216
00:15:14,025 --> 00:15:19,120
that Leah's disappearance deserted those poor girls-- I mean, virgins.
217
00:15:19,462 --> 00:15:21,903
He asked me to fill in for her at the ceremony tonight.
218
00:15:22,872 --> 00:15:26,735
You know-- hand out the wine, make up a few blessings.
219
00:15:26,735 --> 00:15:30,089
And I thought, what the hey, I'm in the mood for a good deed.
220
00:15:30,089 --> 00:15:31,589
Tell me more about Balius.
221
00:15:31,589 --> 00:15:34,948
Bali? Well, he's the head priest.
222
00:15:35,247 --> 00:15:37,358
A bit of a cream puff if you ask me.
223
00:15:43,493 --> 00:15:45,065
What are you doing?
224
00:15:46,591 --> 00:15:48,526
I'm going to take your place.
225
00:15:48,526 --> 00:15:50,703
I'm gonna find out who's trying to get Leah and why.
226
00:15:53,088 --> 00:15:56,299
Stay here. And don't make trouble.
227
00:15:56,966 --> 00:16:00,237
How could I make trouble?
I'm a virgin!
228
00:16:04,693 --> 00:16:05,673
Great bed.
229
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:14,124
Meg, what happened?
230
00:16:15,098 --> 00:16:17,128
Meg, where have you been?
We got problems.
231
00:16:17,548 --> 00:16:18,878
Kara's got some guy in room 3.
232
00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:20,691
I think she's giving him a freebie.
233
00:16:21,462 --> 00:16:24,897
A freebie?
Gabrielle, what's she talking about?
234
00:16:25,846 --> 00:16:28,690
Um-- what Meg means is-- why not let me--
235
00:16:28,690 --> 00:16:30,253
um-- her new assistant, help you?
236
00:16:30,253 --> 00:16:31,535
That's good thinking, Meg.
237
00:16:31,535 --> 00:16:33,712
Why don't you just wait by the bar and I'll be back.
238
00:16:34,126 --> 00:16:35,075
Oh.
239
00:16:36,719 --> 00:16:38,031
OK, I'm ready, huh-- I think.
240
00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:48,344
Ladies, Meg-- your prayers have been answered.
241
00:16:48,936 --> 00:16:50,988
Joxer! Look, it's Joxer!
242
00:16:51,193 --> 00:16:52,192
Ha-ha.
243
00:16:52,192 --> 00:16:57,285
Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me.
244
00:17:08,786 --> 00:17:10,120
Joxer the Mighty,
245
00:17:10,384 --> 00:17:12,131
Master of virility,
246
00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:14,196
Every woman wants him,
247
00:17:14,196 --> 00:17:15,999
He's so sexy it's a sin,
248
00:17:15,999 --> 00:17:17,900
If you want a special tryst,
249
00:17:17,900 --> 00:17:19,754
He's the man you can't resist,
250
00:17:19,754 --> 00:17:22,371
By every measure he's a prize!
251
00:17:22,371 --> 00:17:27,205
Just check out my shoe size!
Just check out his shoe size!
252
00:17:27,205 --> 00:17:27,891
Ha-Ha!
253
00:17:27,891 --> 00:17:30,944
He's Joxer, Joxer the Mighty!
254
00:17:36,299 --> 00:17:36,896
Ha-Ha!
255
00:17:39,455 --> 00:17:40,939
Joxer the Mighty,
256
00:17:41,144 --> 00:17:42,822
Captain of debauchery.
257
00:17:42,822 --> 00:17:44,782
Never seems to get enough
258
00:17:44,782 --> 00:17:46,759
Of our tantalizing stuff.
259
00:17:47,032 --> 00:17:48,580
If you need some company,
260
00:17:48,580 --> 00:17:50,518
With Joxer there's a guarantee,
261
00:17:50,926 --> 00:17:52,739
Of the highest potency!
262
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,802
Heck, I'd even work for free!
263
00:17:56,175 --> 00:17:58,824
Take your filthy hands off me!!!
264
00:18:00,190 --> 00:18:03,208
He's-- Joxer, Joxer the Mighty!
265
00:18:04,524 --> 00:18:08,953
What do you think you are doing?
I am a Hestian virgin!
266
00:18:09,180 --> 00:18:13,307
Oh, oh-- I-- oh! Right. Well, um
267
00:18:13,307 --> 00:18:16,413
perhaps, the, uh-- Hestian virgin--
268
00:18:16,858 --> 00:18:19,389
would like to teach naughty Joxer a lesson.
269
00:18:19,995 --> 00:18:23,642
Ha-ha! I'm waitin', my little donut.
270
00:18:23,642 --> 00:18:24,756
Hi,Gabrielle.
271
00:18:25,304 --> 00:18:29,319
Hi, Gabrielle. Ah, ah, hi, hi, hi-- how you doing?
272
00:18:29,319 --> 00:18:30,242
Good, fine.
273
00:18:30,242 --> 00:18:31,447
I'm just-- I'm fine.
274
00:18:32,622 --> 00:18:33,666
Uh-- what're you doing here?
275
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:35,885
Huh! I'd like to ask you the same thing.
276
00:18:35,885 --> 00:18:36,573
Oh.
277
00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:39,166
But, I don't want to know. Come here.
278
00:18:39,915 --> 00:18:43,094
Oh. Oh, oh, I can't-- oh-- sheesh!
279
00:18:46,209 --> 00:18:49,966
Wait a minute.
The woman I love is working here.
280
00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:53,434
I've gotta stop her. On the other hand
281
00:18:54,410 --> 00:18:58,126
I am just a-- small business transaction
away from pressing my lips against her.
282
00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:00,248
What am I saying?
283
00:19:00,770 --> 00:19:01,461
Yeah.
284
00:19:01,461 --> 00:19:05,655
Gabrielle-- whatever terrible tragedy brought you into this life--
285
00:19:06,054 --> 00:19:07,343
I want you to stop it.
286
00:19:07,593 --> 00:19:11,957
Joxer, it's a long story, but I do not work here. OK--
287
00:19:11,957 --> 00:19:14,592
Wa-wa-wa-wa- wait, wait wait. So, you-- you're on a mission?
288
00:19:14,592 --> 00:19:20,457
Right. Um-- I think you should know this. This is not Meg.
289
00:19:20,457 --> 00:19:23,502
This is Leah-- the Hestian priestess.
290
00:19:24,234 --> 00:19:25,463
Wait, wait, wait a minute, wait a minute.
291
00:19:25,683 --> 00:19:27,967
Meg-- has a double? Which looks--
292
00:19:29,111 --> 00:19:29,654
Yeah?
293
00:19:29,654 --> 00:19:31,121
-- like a-- virgin priestess.
294
00:19:31,121 --> 00:19:32,080
Mmm
295
00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:35,276
You OK?
296
00:19:35,990 --> 00:19:39,713
Of course I'm not OK! I just defiled a virgin Priestess.
297
00:19:40,498 --> 00:19:41,119
Let's go. Come on.
298
00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:43,089
I'm going straight to Tartarus, now.
299
00:20:33,986 --> 00:20:35,298
What're you doing?
300
00:20:37,487 --> 00:20:42,194
Bali. I just got bored, so I started lookin' around.
301
00:20:43,312 --> 00:20:44,221
This is pretty!
302
00:20:44,221 --> 00:20:45,409
What is it?
303
00:20:49,455 --> 00:20:51,565
It's not a Hestian medallion.
304
00:20:51,930 --> 00:20:54,367
Something tells me you're not a Hestian priest.
305
00:20:54,673 --> 00:20:58,943
You breathe a word to anyone-- you're dead!
306
00:21:00,192 --> 00:21:03,566
You got something cooking against the Hestians?
307
00:21:03,566 --> 00:21:06,564
Come on. Cut me in on the action.
308
00:21:06,564 --> 00:21:11,269
We'll see. For now, just you play your part, my little tramp.
309
00:21:12,090 --> 00:21:13,098
Mmm.
310
00:21:16,035 --> 00:21:19,972
Balius. May I have a word with you-- in private?
311
00:21:20,619 --> 00:21:25,098
Oh, I can take a hint. See you later, Bali.
312
00:21:28,096 --> 00:21:29,252
Who was that woman?
313
00:21:29,252 --> 00:21:31,589
Meg, of course. Why?
314
00:21:31,589 --> 00:21:34,257
If that was Meg-- who's at the temple altar--
315
00:21:34,257 --> 00:21:36,270
polishing off the sacrifical wine?
316
00:21:54,834 --> 00:21:56,731
Hello, Meg.
317
00:21:57,472 --> 00:22:01,408
Bali. I was just making a contribution.
318
00:22:01,972 --> 00:22:04,732
Hey, you know everyone around the temple-- maybe you can help.
319
00:22:05,296 --> 00:22:07,388
Does Leah have any enemies?
320
00:22:07,388 --> 00:22:10,444
Someone who might be trying to knock
her off and take over as Priestess?
321
00:22:10,444 --> 00:22:11,610
Why do you ask?
322
00:22:11,610 --> 00:22:13,317
I'm just trying to help out a friend.
323
00:22:13,317 --> 00:22:15,483
She says someone might be trying to kill Leah.
324
00:22:15,483 --> 00:22:17,482
Would that friend be Xena?
325
00:22:17,482 --> 00:22:19,444
I _can't_ say.
326
00:22:22,154 --> 00:22:23,715
But if you can't trust a man of the cloth,
327
00:22:23,715 --> 00:22:25,175
who can ya trust, huh?
328
00:22:25,841 --> 00:22:26,799
Yeah-- it's Xena.
329
00:22:26,799 --> 00:22:28,654
She's a really, really good friend of mine.
330
00:22:28,654 --> 00:22:30,427
She's checking out the temple as we speak.
331
00:22:30,936 --> 00:22:35,122
Thank Hestia she's here. Tell me, is Leah all right?
332
00:22:36,339 --> 00:22:37,770
Yeah, couldn't be better.
333
00:22:38,029 --> 00:22:39,956
She's hiding out at my place, pretending to be me.
334
00:22:39,956 --> 00:22:41,122
Ain't that a kick in the head.
335
00:22:41,122 --> 00:22:44,089
It certainly is. In any event,
336
00:22:44,089 --> 00:22:46,844
I'm gonna need your services for the ceremony tonight.
337
00:22:47,050 --> 00:22:49,341
You're the only one who can do justice to the part.
338
00:22:49,967 --> 00:22:51,739
Really? I'm that good?
339
00:22:51,739 --> 00:22:53,240
Absolutely.
340
00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:55,581
The ceremony wouldn't be the same without you.
341
00:22:56,814 --> 00:22:59,625
Excellent. OK.
342
00:23:02,689 --> 00:23:03,800
Xena's here.
343
00:23:04,093 --> 00:23:07,280
Take a contingent of guards-- and search the temple.
344
00:23:08,146 --> 00:23:09,874
Make sure she doesn't escape.
345
00:23:09,874 --> 00:23:11,592
What about the Priestess?
346
00:23:11,968 --> 00:23:14,158
Xena can't be in two places at once.
347
00:23:14,531 --> 00:23:19,093
I'll send a few men down to the tavern, to slit Leah's throat.
348
00:23:26,406 --> 00:23:28,283
I thought I told you to stay put.
349
00:23:28,283 --> 00:23:30,628
Ah-- well, I got thirsty.
350
00:23:31,063 --> 00:23:33,490
You were wrong about Balius. He's a Deilian.
351
00:23:33,490 --> 00:23:35,272
They despise all Hestians.
352
00:23:35,272 --> 00:23:38,780
He set Leah up, and he's got plans for the other Hestians as well.
353
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:42,844
Something wrong?
354
00:23:42,844 --> 00:23:44,639
Mm-mm. Mm.
355
00:23:45,779 --> 00:23:47,771
All right. You stay out of sight.
356
00:23:47,771 --> 00:23:50,152
I need more time to check out what he's up to.
357
00:23:50,152 --> 00:23:51,225
OK.
358
00:23:54,315 --> 00:23:56,774
Priestess-- it's time for declarations.
359
00:23:57,846 --> 00:24:02,190
Look, can-- can this wait? I'm really busy right now.
360
00:24:02,500 --> 00:24:03,799
What's gotten into you?
361
00:24:03,799 --> 00:24:06,938
You know we must declare our
sins to you at the same time every day.
362
00:24:16,026 --> 00:24:17,268
Shoot.
363
00:24:17,268 --> 00:24:20,808
It all started in the garden.
I was happily tilling the soil
364
00:24:21,091 --> 00:24:27,577
when my eyes fell upon something magnificent--
the summer squash.
365
00:24:29,486 --> 00:24:31,144
Priestess?
366
00:24:31,955 --> 00:24:33,548
Go on-- I'm listening.
367
00:24:33,892 --> 00:24:37,229
My mind raced. Surely,
the gods wouldn't have given us such...
368
00:24:42,862 --> 00:24:44,477
Is everything all right,Priest?
369
00:24:44,691 --> 00:24:46,382
Yes, perfect. Go on.
370
00:24:47,581 --> 00:24:48,393
Well--
371
00:24:48,705 --> 00:24:51,771
So, Balius knows I'm here.
What else does he know?
372
00:24:52,118 --> 00:24:55,162
He knows about Leah.
He sent men to Meg's place to kill her
373
00:24:55,676 --> 00:24:56,824
What was that, Priestess?
374
00:24:57,040 --> 00:24:59,507
Ah, nothing. Please continue.
375
00:25:00,268 --> 00:25:03,645
And the other Hestians--
what's he going to do with them?
376
00:25:03,645 --> 00:25:06,877
He's gonna kill 'em-- at the ceremony.
That's all I know
377
00:25:07,144 --> 00:25:09,740
I can't even enjoy salad without--
feeling guilty.
378
00:25:17,418 --> 00:25:19,411
Wait! I need your advice
379
00:25:20,052 --> 00:25:23,668
Look. Sometimes, it is best to
take matters into your own hands
380
00:25:26,386 --> 00:25:27,558
Well?
381
00:25:35,133 --> 00:25:37,437
Gabrielle. Where are you?
382
00:25:50,199 --> 00:25:50,946
Gab--
383
00:25:51,544 --> 00:25:53,063
Who's been a naughty blacksmith?
384
00:25:53,063 --> 00:25:53,806
I have.
385
00:25:53,806 --> 00:25:55,167
Ohh!
386
00:26:04,815 --> 00:26:06,635
I hope that's a petting zoo.
387
00:26:07,014 --> 00:26:09,442
Oh, please, let that be a petting zoo!
388
00:26:10,305 --> 00:26:11,034
Sweet Hestia,
389
00:26:11,034 --> 00:26:13,253
I'm in a den of filth!
390
00:26:13,766 --> 00:26:17,046
Leah?! What are you doing here?!
391
00:26:18,856 --> 00:26:22,125
Gabrielle--
you knew what kind of a place this was,and you still kept
392
00:26:22,125 --> 00:26:25,387
these-- these-- harlots."
393
00:26:26,083 --> 00:26:28,552
N-now look. I, I know this place isn't perfect.
394
00:26:28,882 --> 00:26:29,549
And, and, and--
395
00:26:29,549 --> 00:26:31,612
maybe it was a bad idea to bring you here, but, but--
396
00:26:32,362 --> 00:26:35,269
Leah, if you stop to think about it--
397
00:26:35,269 --> 00:26:38,647
what better place for a person
like you to do some good?
398
00:26:40,135 --> 00:26:44,928
Onward virgin soldiers, marching us to war.
399
00:26:44,928 --> 00:26:48,457
Please-- you have to be supported by your diaphragm
400
00:26:50,269 --> 00:26:51,708
All right, we'll try it one more time
401
00:26:53,071 --> 00:26:59,697
Onward virgin soldiers, marching us to war.
I'll make virgins of them yet. Smile!
402
00:26:59,925 --> 00:27:01,207
Onward virgin soldiers--
403
00:27:01,568 --> 00:27:04,365
Hey, girls, there's a whole _bunch_ of guards
comingdown from the Hestian temple.
404
00:27:04,365 --> 00:27:05,930
Looks like it's gonna be a busy _night_!
405
00:27:07,787 --> 00:27:10,180
Well all right, but remember to practice those high notes!
406
00:27:10,456 --> 00:27:11,272
We've got trouble.
407
00:27:11,272 --> 00:27:12,582
Hmm?
408
00:27:12,809 --> 00:27:14,203
Where did you get this outfit?
409
00:27:14,561 --> 00:27:15,767
I found it in a back room.
410
00:27:15,767 --> 00:27:16,873
There were lots of costumes in there.
411
00:27:16,873 --> 00:27:17,997
Maybe they're planning a party.
412
00:27:17,997 --> 00:27:20,394
Never mind. Look-- you've gotta hide.
413
00:27:20,684 --> 00:27:21,996
I'll try to convince them you're not here.
414
00:27:22,716 --> 00:27:24,403
And, the choir was a nice touch.
415
00:27:24,675 --> 00:27:28,519
It was, wasn't it? Gabrielle-- thanks.
416
00:27:29,875 --> 00:27:31,312
Onward Virgin--
417
00:27:31,645 --> 00:27:35,127
OK, girls, now thank you.
Be busy, make me proud, have a good time.
418
00:27:35,330 --> 00:27:37,031
we've got the basement all ready for you. Are you coming?
419
00:27:37,031 --> 00:27:38,238
Yeah-- I'll be right there.
420
00:27:38,238 --> 00:27:39,093
OK, fine, Dear.
421
00:27:43,588 --> 00:27:44,974
I thought I told you to hide.
422
00:27:44,974 --> 00:27:47,380
Look, it's gonna be all right-- come on
423
00:27:48,777 --> 00:27:49,630
Keep moving.
424
00:27:53,254 --> 00:27:55,849
Your Holiness. Please-- forgive me.
425
00:27:56,287 --> 00:27:57,879
To think I could've mistaken someone like you--
426
00:27:57,879 --> 00:28:00,654
an innocent, sheltered woman-- for somebody like Meg,
427
00:28:00,654 --> 00:28:02,382
who's been around the block plenty--believe me
428
00:28:03,289 --> 00:28:05,505
You may give me your punishment as you see fit
429
00:28:08,609 --> 00:28:09,328
Hah!
430
00:28:13,190 --> 00:28:17,793
Why-- ? Aww-- boy, you virgins pack a wallop.
431
00:28:18,229 --> 00:28:19,451
Must be all that pent-up energy
432
00:28:19,451 --> 00:28:20,577
I don't know what you're talking about.
433
00:28:20,889 --> 00:28:22,216
I'm just looking for a place to hide.
434
00:28:22,216 --> 00:28:22,925
From who?
435
00:28:22,925 --> 00:28:26,076
The temple gods.
I should've straightened this out while
436
00:28:26,076 --> 00:28:27,091
I had the chance.
437
00:28:27,091 --> 00:28:29,514
who could expect Meg to play a convincing virgin?
Once it's over,
438
00:28:29,514 --> 00:28:30,481
it's over!
439
00:28:30,883 --> 00:28:33,244
Wait a minute!
You mean Meg is posing as you in the temple
440
00:28:33,694 --> 00:28:38,027
Well, at least she was.
I don't know where I am.
441
00:28:39,257 --> 00:28:41,520
Oh-- the guards.
442
00:28:41,994 --> 00:28:44,226
They must have discovered her.
That's why they're here!
443
00:28:45,914 --> 00:28:48,633
That makes trouble.
I've got to save her.
444
00:28:50,758 --> 00:28:52,235
Say a prayer for me,Priestess.
445
00:29:00,174 --> 00:29:02,050
Oh-- Leah-- I know you're really mad at me,
446
00:29:02,050 --> 00:29:04,068
and I don't blame you one little bit, but I swear,
447
00:29:04,068 --> 00:29:06,208
I didn't know that Bali was a bad guy
448
00:29:06,208 --> 00:29:06,882
Meg, I--
449
00:29:06,882 --> 00:29:08,409
No, you gotta give me a chance to make it up to ya.
450
00:29:09,159 --> 00:29:11,129
Bali's guards are outside, so you stay here,
451
00:29:11,129 --> 00:29:12,653
I'll go out there and pretend to be you
452
00:29:12,653 --> 00:29:13,743
pretending to be me. You see?
453
00:29:16,291 --> 00:29:20,968
Curses! Too late!
Step back! It's me you want.
454
00:29:21,601 --> 00:29:24,135
I am the holy woman!
455
00:29:34,577 --> 00:29:38,750
Hello, Xena. I'm sorry I messed up.
456
00:29:39,134 --> 00:29:40,164
It's all right, Meg.
457
00:29:41,072 --> 00:29:42,103
-- so I can hear them.
458
00:29:44,322 --> 00:29:45,102
You all right?
459
00:29:47,602 --> 00:29:55,322
OK. I can do this. You're Leah. You must be--
460
00:29:59,666 --> 00:30:01,292
Souvenirs are giving me chafing.
461
00:30:01,915 --> 00:30:04,566
-- Meg. And that means that you--
462
00:30:04,566 --> 00:30:06,637
Just glad everyone's all in one piece.
463
00:30:06,637 --> 00:30:07,759
How many guards are outside?
464
00:30:07,759 --> 00:30:09,591
Too many. And they're well armed.
465
00:30:09,821 --> 00:30:11,856
Me Don't worry about that.
My girls will take care of them.
466
00:30:11,856 --> 00:30:13,956
Well, that's great, but we have a bigger problem.
467
00:30:13,956 --> 00:30:16,231
Joxer's gone to the temple to save you, Meg.
468
00:30:19,098 --> 00:30:22,576
Fools! How could you let Meg escape?!
469
00:30:22,981 --> 00:30:26,652
If she's not here to pose
as Leah at tonight's ceremony,
470
00:30:26,652 --> 00:30:29,141
y plan will never succeed!
471
00:30:29,731 --> 00:30:35,348
The stupid tramp is probably back
at the tavern,protected by Xena!
472
00:30:36,044 --> 00:30:38,824
How am I gonna get her back in time?!
473
00:30:40,111 --> 00:30:44,831
I'll save you, Meeeg!
Ugh. Ugh. Oh
474
00:30:47,291 --> 00:30:50,302
Meg, Gee, you got big feet for a girl
475
00:30:50,645 --> 00:30:56,832
I always thought that the g- g-- hi fellas.
Nice uniforms.
476
00:30:57,365 --> 00:30:58,367
Got your tailor's address?
477
00:30:58,790 --> 00:31:01,480
You know, we could all get together
and have lunch some-- evening.
478
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:02,988
Well,call you then
Bye-bye.
479
00:31:07,236 --> 00:31:09,102
A gift from the gods.
480
00:31:14,082 --> 00:31:15,738
I think our work here is done.
481
00:31:15,738 --> 00:31:17,737
Meg, you and your girls did a great job.
482
00:31:17,737 --> 00:31:19,549
Now, we have to get Leah back to the temple,
483
00:31:19,549 --> 00:31:21,894
and show Balius up for what he really is.
484
00:31:22,115 --> 00:31:23,237
Come on.
485
00:31:24,350 --> 00:31:25,775
Bye. Bye.
486
00:31:28,177 --> 00:31:29,635
Good luck.
487
00:31:31,674 --> 00:31:34,459
Bye. Bye.
488
00:31:38,211 --> 00:31:39,345
What do you want of me?
489
00:31:39,785 --> 00:31:44,066
You, my dear wench, are gonna help me
fulfill my greastest fantasy
490
00:31:44,679 --> 00:31:49,377
Hestian virgins off the face of the earth!
Guards!
491
00:32:18,689 --> 00:32:20,098
Hi, evewyone.
492
00:32:20,443 --> 00:32:23,361
I think I'm getting stage-fwight.
493
00:32:24,025 --> 00:32:26,723
You don't want me to lose it
all over them virgins, do ya?
494
00:32:26,723 --> 00:32:31,901
I'll take my chances.
You want Joxer to live, don't you Priestss
495
00:32:32,474 --> 00:32:33,191
Yeah.
496
00:32:35,926 --> 00:32:38,319
You don't want to do that.
497
00:32:40,589 --> 00:32:41,974
Poison?
498
00:32:41,974 --> 00:32:46,180
Give each of them a glass-- and then read this proclamation,written in Hestian.
499
00:32:47,180 --> 00:32:51,286
Then they'll drink the poison, and it will all be over.
500
00:33:07,787 --> 00:33:09,410
Priestess Leah.
501
00:33:10,564 --> 00:33:11,596
I need help, Xena!
502
00:33:21,673 --> 00:33:23,524
We've captured the priestess trying to enter the temple.
503
00:33:24,004 --> 00:33:25,173
Shall we execute her?
504
00:33:25,595 --> 00:33:27,048
Throw her in the dungeon.
505
00:33:27,989 --> 00:33:33,628
I wanna see the look on her face when all
her sweet little Hestians-- are dead.
506
00:33:34,127 --> 00:33:37,878
You connect anyone in mythology,
back with the great warrior Thalidopes.
507
00:33:39,010 --> 00:33:39,821
OK,look.
508
00:33:39,821 --> 00:33:40,937
Let's say we wanted to connect--
509
00:33:41,403 --> 00:33:43,685
Echidna-- the mother of all monsters with Thalidopes.
510
00:33:43,685 --> 00:33:45,680
OK, now-- you're probably saying,
How's he gonna do that,
511
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:50,539
It's like-- right?' OK, well-- um--
Echidna met Hercules--
512
00:33:50,759 --> 00:33:51,853
who saved her baby,Obi
513
00:33:52,165 --> 00:33:57,560
and Hercules met Thalidopes--
when he rescued the golden fleece.
514
00:33:58,009 --> 00:33:59,788
Get it? OK,you wanna try it?
515
00:34:00,225 --> 00:34:01,773
Open up!
516
00:34:09,353 --> 00:34:11,187
Here's the priestess to keep you company.
517
00:34:11,913 --> 00:34:13,218
But don't get too cozy.
518
00:34:14,541 --> 00:34:16,415
You'll both be dead by dawn.
519
00:34:17,720 --> 00:34:19,478
Yeah, well don't bet on it, roadblock!
520
00:34:20,501 --> 00:34:21,479
Eh, the nerve of that guy.
521
00:34:22,727 --> 00:34:23,478
Don't worry about it, Priestess;
522
00:34:23,478 --> 00:34:26,144
I'll take care of everything.
You just wait.
523
00:34:26,539 --> 00:34:29,864
First of all, gotta get that big
dumb-looking guy with the keys to come over
524
00:34:30,193 --> 00:34:31,537
Then once he's lured in,
525
00:34:31,798 --> 00:34:34,801
I'll wait for the right moment and _pounce_ on him!
526
00:34:35,080 --> 00:34:38,413
Yeah. Then I'll grab the keys from him,
527
00:34:39,140 --> 00:34:44,350
stick 'em in the door, turn it, and let us out.
I tell you, it's so easy,
528
00:34:44,350 --> 00:34:45,823
Priestess,any idiot could do it.
529
00:34:46,035 --> 00:34:47,083
Come on, idiot.
530
00:34:47,910 --> 00:34:48,786
Hi, Xena.
531
00:35:22,725 --> 00:35:25,934
And now we'll pause for a brief
musical interlude
532
00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:41,286
These are the words of Hestia
'Dama anowee.
533
00:35:49,710 --> 00:35:52,064
Esti kai kalowee.
534
00:35:52,439 --> 00:35:57,408
Esti kalowee kai.
Esti kalowee kai.
535
00:36:15,431 --> 00:36:19,595
Worshipers of Hestia, see what your goddess has done.
536
00:36:20,241 --> 00:36:22,985
She has killed those most loyal to her
537
00:36:23,221 --> 00:36:25,220
and betrayed your trust.
538
00:36:25,812 --> 00:36:31,100
It's time you all converted to
Deilianism-- the one true religion.
539
00:36:31,913 --> 00:36:35,851
Hestianism is dead-- not by the hand of man--
540
00:36:36,727 --> 00:36:40,749
but by the very words of goddess herself.
541
00:36:45,758 --> 00:36:49,787
Kalistweea. Kalowee kai.
542
00:36:58,728 --> 00:36:59,795
It's a miracle!
543
00:37:02,789 --> 00:37:07,258
I don't understand.
You told them not to swallow.
544
00:37:07,461 --> 00:37:08,712
You're not Meg
545
00:37:09,108 --> 00:37:13,043
The only woman who knows the
ancient Hestian language is-- Leah.
546
00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:18,397
That's wight-- Bali.
And you're headed for the dungeon,my man
547
00:37:18,713 --> 00:37:21,120
Not before you die.
548
00:37:21,682 --> 00:37:24,084
Unhand that Hestian!
549
00:37:24,084 --> 00:37:27,390
You can't stop me!
550
00:37:35,566 --> 00:37:36,270
Get her!
551
00:37:41,675 --> 00:37:42,738
I will succeed, Priestess-
552
00:37:43,010 --> 00:37:46,866
even if I have to kill every Hestian myself--
starting with you.
553
00:38:29,335 --> 00:38:30,645
Can you come take over here?
554
00:38:30,645 --> 00:38:31,487
My pleasure!
555
00:38:31,958 --> 00:38:32,690
Excellent!
556
00:38:47,222 --> 00:38:48,589
Stay away from us!
557
00:38:48,589 --> 00:38:52,480
You're a religious man, Balius.
I got three words for you.
558
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:53,984
Say your prayers
559
00:39:28,823 --> 00:39:30,324
Leah
560
00:39:30,952 --> 00:39:34,417
What would Hestia say about your use of physical violence?
561
00:39:36,498 --> 00:39:41,342
In this case, I think she'd say-- 'Nicely done.'
562
00:39:44,348 --> 00:39:45,155
-- behind the bush!
563
00:40:00,752 --> 00:40:03,418
I just wanted to show my gratitude.
564
00:40:05,483 --> 00:40:09,326
I know that-- I know that I may
have misjudged you.
565
00:40:09,850 --> 00:40:13,130
Maybe a little.
Maybe a lot.
566
00:40:14,457 --> 00:40:17,426
I guess I never really thought there was
anything worthwhile outside the temple
567
00:40:18,017 --> 00:40:22,643
ou've proved me wrong, and I'm glad.
Thank you.
568
00:40:27,886 --> 00:40:30,015
I still think you'd make
a great virgin.
569
00:40:33,622 --> 00:40:34,582
Captioned by Grantman Brown
42422
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