Original subtitles

[projector clicking, ♪...]

[lighter clicks]

- [with Russian accent] When I die, I am going to go

straight to heaven...

And you're going to ask me why.

Did I pray enough?

No.

Did I share enough?

Not really.

Was I humble enough?

Definitely not.

"So what makes you so sure

you're going straight to heaven?"

You ask me.

And I will tell you...

Because I told the truth.

[marching drums beating...]

[music plays]

[music plays]

[music plays]

[music ends]

[piano playing...]

- And five... [mouthing words]

[piano playing continues...]

Humanity seems to be divided

into two categories:

People trying to be good

and people trying to be bad.

- ...Three, four, and five.

Borey, get those back

legs under...

- But personally I don't always see so much difference,

because if you spend your whole life as a saint, eventually you

will crave the opposite and the

filth will appear as an oasis in the desert.

- That was a bit better,

but the arms... [grunts]

Yes, keeping the shoulders down.

- But if you'll spend your life

in the gutter, sooner or later

you will be searching for wisdom...

[store bell jingles]

- [woman shouting in Indian dialect]

- Russian man: ...Like a pig

sniffing for truffles.

- [shouting in Indian dialect...]

[pills rattling]

[continues speaking angrily in Indian dialect...]

[woman's shouting continues...]

...Hanky panky god damn bastard!

- Filth and wisdom...

They are two sides of the same coin.

[piano playing...]

...And you know, whichever side

is facing up eventually will lead to your salvation.

In my country, we have a saying...

"...He who licks the knives

soon will cut his tongue"

So if you want to be saved,

you've got to go to hell first.

...Drop and give me 20, you skinny little fuck!

You worthless piece of shit.

You're fucking pathetic!

You'd never make it into my platoon!

- Man, panting: Sir, yes, sir.

- What the fuck did you just call me?

Did you just tell me to fuck my mother?

- No, sir.

- Uh-huh... So you're saying that my sister is a whore?

Do you know what?

I fucked your sister and

I fucked her in the ass!

[speaking Russian]

Lick my boots, you fucking pencil-dick!

You gotta fucking lick 'em!

- [panting]

- Fucking disgusting!

[thud, man groans]

[thud, man groans and pants]

Your time is up.

[music plays]

[speaking Russian]

[music plays]

- [woman singing next door in foreign language]

- Oh, he's good when he's not at home.

- [woman continues singing next door in foreign language]

- Thank you.

- [man joins woman singing in foreign language]

- Can it just be true that when we tip our head to the left,

the liquids inside run this way

and so we pretty much think that

shit is this way...

[clicking lighter rapidly]

Then we tip our head to the right and the liquids inside

flow other way... And we think

pretty much the opposite.

Or just keep your head all straight...

[spits]

Like dear, old daddy says...

[sighs]

And pretty soon you'll get yourself a swamp up there.

[music plays]

Take Professor Flynn...

He live on the ground floor.

[knocking on door]

- Andre?

- The one and only!

Here I come!

- Andre!

- ...He write many books and

has much respect as a poet, but

he sit in darkness and alone.

What took you so long?

- Come in, come in.

- I'll just put away this for you.

...I'm his errand boy.

- Thank you.

- At your service any time.

...And not in a kinky way.

- A little bit noisy upstairs last night, Andre.

- He's got a swamp up there.

- Andre?

[music stops]

- How many times?

My name is A.K.

Why can't you just call me A.K.?

- I thought we had an arrangement.

- Yeah, an arrangement is is

that I get paid to be your errand boy.

- Overpaid.

- Overpaid.

- Overpaid.

- Overpaid...

[Flynn chuckles]

- And not that you get to call

me a name that a dog of a father gave to me.

- Stop being so dramatic, Andre.

- But I love dramatic.

- And I love words.

- But there is more to love than words.

- For instance?

- For instance, a back of a woman's neck.

- Ahh, but you needed words to tell me that.

Hmm? Naughty, naughty, naughty,

naughty, naughty, naughty.

- Touché, professor.

I don't mean to be rude, but if you love words so much, how

could you stop writing?

- The day I stopped seeing is the day I stopped writing.

- Well, then you're just wasting your talent.

- How, may I ask...

Are you wasting yours?

- The last time a man put

his hand on me did not end very nicely.

Strange how every branch has

desire to imitate its root.

- [growling angrily...]

- ♪ ...My hand reached...

- [father speaking Russian]

- ♪ And ordered me to...

[boy screams]

♪ ...And took me to a strunk and drunk banquet... ♪

♪ Where Rimsky and Korsakov, they met ♪

♪ All the strunk at the drunk banquet ♪

[singing in Russian...]

♪ Still, I miss...

[singing in Russian]

- [speaking Russian]

[boy screaming]

- [singing in Russian...]

♪ ...Is the best

[music plays]

- [speaking Russian]

[music plays]

[man grunts]

[music plays]

- Have a nice day, professor.

[music plays]

[music fades]

- Morning, Sardeep.

- Morning, morning.

Please hurry, we have many bloody customers through here.

Come, come, come, come, come.

- O.K.

- [whispering]: O.K., hurry,

hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, get to work.

[inhales deeply]

Oh, Juliette...

Bloody hell.

- Thank you.

- Man: Thank you.

- Hello.

It'll just be a few moments,

O.K.?

Sardeep.

Hi, Chloe.

- How are you?

- Fine, thanks.

I'm a little busy right now.

- Dad says hello.

- Hello, dad.

- Yeah, he's hoping you'll get sick of this hideous job,

change your mind about going to medical school.

- Since when did you become his step-and-fetch-it dog?

I'm not going to medical school.

I want to help people, not rip them off on Harley street.

- Dad helps people.

- [scoffs]: Yeah, he has

the healing touch...

We both know that.

- Sardeep: Juliette?

- [whispers]: Thank you.

Miss... Excuse me?

Thank you.

Spare change?

- Why can't you just let go of the past?

- That's exactly what

I'm doing.

- I miss you. [sighs]

[store bell jingles]

[traffic passing outside]

[door shuts, store bell jingles]

- Are you all right there, Sar?

Deep in thought, are we, my son?

- Oh, hello, Mickey, you all right?

I didn't see you there.

- Yeah, good, thank you.

- Just this?

- Yes, please.

- O.K.

[whispers]: Can I...?

Thank you very much, and here's your change.

- Thank you.

- And a bag, do you want a bag? - Yes, please.

- Of course you want a bag and, uh... Your bag.

- Thank you.

By the way, how is the wife and kids?

- Fine!

- Nice, liking your style... Quality.

[coins clatter in cup]

Ta-da.

- Why is everyone obsessed with these bloody, starving africans?

Ooooh, hello.

- I'll have the money by next week.

- Yeah, no worries.

I mean, you know, there's no

rush... Just when you can.

- I'm sorry, you know I'd give it to you.

- A.K.: Take Holly,

for example.

She's got herself a swamp

there too.

She's beautiful...

She ballet dancing for 16 years.

She is everything

I've ever... Wanted...

[snaps fingers]

But she's broke.

- O.K., will someone please

tell me why I still don't have a job?

- Maybe I can try.

Let's see... It's not 1800s

anymore, we're not in Russia,

and nobody gives a fuck about ballet.

- [chuckles]: Yeah, we're all fucked.

- [chuckles]: Speak for

yourself, fucking Florence Nightingbird.

- [chuckles]

- I'm this far away from

transcontinental superstardom.

- And I'm this far away from

telling the rest of your band

what you do to make money.

- Did you take your medication?

- Yeah, did you?

- You know, in my country,

there is a saying, "if you want to reach the sky, fuck a duck

and try to fly"

Listen, blondie pretty girl.

You don't need to lead this

mouth-to-hand existence.

You have a whole cash box on your body.

A good stripper can make a lot of dough in just one night.

You have the body for it...

So dance with, baby girl.

- You are a vile, disgusting gypsy.

- Yeah, yeah.

- I'd never even contemplate taking my clothes off for

a bunch of dirty old men.

How much?

- That's my girl.

[whispers]: I knew you were a filthy slut.

[records scratches, ♪...]

[all laughing]

[wolf-whistle, man shouting]

[music plays]

[man vocalizing...]

- Man: ♪ Oh

♪ Ooh!

♪ Oh!

[music plays]

♪ Oh, oh!

♪ When I was a little spy

[vocalizing rhythm]

♪ Supernatural and infantile

[vocalizing rhythm]

♪ I learned well how to hide... ♪

[music ends]

[metal clatters]

- Excuse me, do you know where

I can find Harry Beechman?

[muffled rap music plays...]

Mr. Beechman.

- I'm Beechman.

- Oh... I'm here

for the audition.

We spoke on the phone.

- Ahh...

You must be Holly.

Enchanté, Holly.

En... [kiss] Chan... [kiss]

TEÉ... [kiss], Holly, hmmm?

Um, do you have a costume?

- I have a leotard.

- Oh, dear.

Knickers and bra will do.

- Right... Um, do you have a changing room?

- No. - No.

- Come on... [snaps fingers]

Allez, Allez...

Tout de suite...

That's it, lovely.

Undress for me, Holly.

[chuckles]

Hit it, Ade!

["the stripper" plays loudly]

That's it.

["the stripper" continues]

Oh... Definitely not.

The pole, the pole!

Work the pole, dear!

Oh, oh, oh...

Um... [music continues...]

Ooh.

Take them off, off.

Turn around.

Turn it...

Fantastic.

O.K., that'll do, Ade.

[Ade chuckles, music stops]

Um... Not exactly

Cirque de Soleil.

Perhaps we can work on a speciality act.

[Ade chuckles]

- A.K.: Oh, no, no, no, no...

Otherwise the glue factory's

waiting for you, Mr. Frisky.

And now let's kick it up, kick

it up and let's kick it up.

And now, perhaps a little bit of

honey oats.

[man groans and whinnies]

...The problem with having a

cash box in your body is that

you always feel empty, even

when it's full...

And sooner or later you'll end up feeling ripped off.

- Oh, Francine...

Impeccable timing.

Um, this is Holly.

She needs a bit of tutoring.

So I'll leave you two alone

for a while...

And see what you can do with it.

[smacks Francine's bottom]

- Francine: Right, let's get

down to business.

First things first...

Take those fucking tights off.

Before Christmas would be nice.

O.K., right... Grab the pole,

keep your arms straight, lean

out and walk slowly round...

Arch your back, tits out, ass out, chin up, maintain eye

contact with your audience...

Well, look like you're enjoying yourself, then.

- I am.

- Tracey!

Come here and show her how

it's done.

- Tracey: Hi. - Hi.

[music plays]

[vacuum humming loudly]

[music plays]

- You ain't as bad as you think you are.

You should see some of

the slappers that turn up here.

At least you've got class.

Ah!

Look, all you got to remember

is one, Japs tip best...

Two, what happens in the club

stays in the club and three, stay away from teenagers,

they never have any money.

- I just can't get my head

around the pole.

- You'll get the hang of it, Mary Poppins.

It ain't your head you got to get round it.

[birds chirping...]

[music plays]

- Countertenor: ♪ O solitude

♪ My sweetest choice

♪ O solitude

- [inhales deeply]

- ♪ O solitude

♪ My sweetest, sweetest choice ♪

♪ Places devoted to the night ♪

♪ Remote from tumult

♪ and from noise

♪ How ye, my restless thoughts

♪ delight

- [inhaling deeply]

- ♪ O solitude

♪ O solitude

♪ My sweetest,

♪ sweetest choice

♪ o... My...

♪ Solitude adore.

[music ends]

[trash can rattles]

- Flynn: Who's there?

Andre?

[stairs creak]

[doorbell buzzes]

Andre.

[piano playing...]

- Good, up with the knees.

- A.K.: It's true...

There is duality in everything.

But perhaps I should ask myself this question?

Am I consciously or unconsciously, actively

or passively...

Collaborating at

this very moment with some

behavior that is destined to

wreak havoc on another

human being?

- ...And good.

[piano playing continues...]

That's better, yes, echapper,

to escape, not these mini,

little things.

That's better, right open.

[drawer slides shut]

- Man: Thanks.

Oh.

[mumbles, indistinct]

- Typical bloody jew.

[coins rattle in jar]

You know, Juliette, there are

over one million orphans living

in Mumbai.

You obviously haven't been reading the bloody news.

- Is that so?

Well, why don't you tell me the bloody news?

- Well, last night on channel

four, documentary, 45 minutes

with john snow, really, really fantastic.

Oh, bloody Chutya...

I told her not to come to work.

One moment, please.

[children shouting, laughing...]

[chutya yelling in Indian dialect...]

[music plays]

- [speaking Russian]

[yelling in Russian...]

[continues yelling in Russian]

- Just get the fuck out of here.

- Eh?

- Just get the fuck out of here!

- Yeah, oh... Get off...

- Get the fuck out of here!

[music plays]

[music plays]

[indistinct conversations...]

[music plays]

[music ends, women giggling]

- Sorry we're late, sir.

- Sit down, girls.

[cane smacks the desk]

Has everybody done their prep?

- Yes, Sir. - Man: Sir.

- Rothschild hasn't.

- Rothschild: [sighs nervously]

- A.K.: "Sir.."

What, "sir"?

- No, sir.

- You, Rothschild...

What is 947 divided by the square root of power of 10?

- Don't know, sir.

[elastic snaps, Holly giggles]

- You don't know. - No.

- Well, come out here,

gutter sniper.

Assume the position.

The other position, imbecile.

The other position, you moron!

What... Is the square...

Root... Of 947 divided by the

square root... Of power of 10?

- Four.

- No! - Three?

- Na! - 20?

- No! - 34?

- No! - 40, 42.

- [whispers]: Right.

- Right?

- No!

- Uh, 16.

- Sit down.

[sighs]

[music plays]

[music stops]

"i traveled the world looking

for lovers of the ultimate

beauty and never settled in.

I... I've traveled the world

looking for lovers of ultimate beauty.

I've traveled the world looking

for lovers of the ultimate

beauty but never settled in"

♪ Back in the day,

♪ as we learned,

♪ a man was not considered to be ♪

♪ Considered to be

- ♪ Fool in love

- ♪ Has he not gone

♪ beyond the hills?

♪ Has he not crossed

♪ the seven seas?

- ♪ Yeah, seven seas,

♪ at least

- ♪ Now all them jokers kept around ♪

♪ just like a scarecrows

♪ in hometown

- ♪ Yeah, scarecrows

♪ in hometown

- ♪ From scream to scream, them traveling ♪

♪ I am a wunderlust king

[music plays]

♪ I stay on the run

♪ Let me out

♪ Let me be gone

♪ In the world, beat-up road signs ♪

♪ I so knew-hoo

♪ History of a diamond

♪ New history of...

♪ Da-da, da-da-da

♪ Da-da, da-da-da

♪ Da-da, da-da-da

♪ Da-da, da-da-da, oh

[music plays]

♪ Da-da, da-da-da, oh

♪ Oh, ya, ya, ya, yay

[music plays]

[laughing]

♪ Through Siberian woods, breaking up their neck ♪

- ♪ ...Around their neck

- ♪ Chinese moving in, building discotheques ♪

- ♪ ...Discotheques

- ♪ Trans-siberian sex toys, and what-a-not?♪

♪ Yeah, why not?

♪ Oh, well, at least it's

♪ something different

♪ from what they got

♪ in every other airport

[singing in Russian...]

♪ I've traveled the world

♪ looking for lovers

♪ of the ultimate beauty

♪ but never settled in

♪ Hi, hey, da-hi, hey,

♪ da-hi, hey, da

♪ I am a wunderlust king

♪ I still on the run

♪ Let me out

♪ Let me be gone

[indistinct]

♪ In the world,

♪ beat-up road signs

♪ I so knew-hoo

♪ History of a diamond

♪ New history of...

♪ Da-da, da-da-da

♪ Da-da, da-da-da

♪ Da-da, da-da-da

♪ Da-da, da-da-da, oh

[music plays]

♪ Hey

♪ Hi, hey, da-hi, hey,

♪ da-hi, hey, da

♪ Hi, hey, da-hi, hey,

♪ da-hi, hey, da

♪ Hey

♪ I am a wunderlust king.

[music fades]

- So, what's your schedule like

for today, then?[thump]

- I thought I'd take another

look at a few more properties.

- Tell me, how many times do

you have to look at a property

before you start to develop it?

- Lot of, uh, details to work

out, square footage, investment

value, neighborhood...

- Will you put that fucking

newspaper down?!

[spoon clatters]

[sweetly] That's better.

Now... You were saying?

[sawing the bread vigorously]

- I was saying, um...

- Details...

- Details to work out. - Mm-hmm.

- Structure, um, expansion capabilities.

- Uh-huh.

- Sorry, sorry, darling, what was I saying?

- Something about capability to expand a structure.

- Ooh, look at the time.

I'd better be, uh...

[blows kiss]

- "Better, better.."

We all want to be better.

[door shuts]

I want to be better.

We want to be better.

The whole world would like

to be better.

We'd all be better if it was

a better world.

[music plays]

[no dialog, ♪...]

[music plays]

[no dialog, ♪...]

[Holly sobs...]

- Do you think you're too good

for this or something?

- It's bad enough I have to get my tits out.

I'm shit.

I'm never going to be as good as Tracey.

It's just so humiliating.

[door creaks open and shuts]

- Do you mind?

- It's a gents', isn't it?

- Yeah, so be a gent and

fuck off!

[door creaks open and shuts]

- [Holly sobs]

[sniffling]: Don't you ever

feel guilty doing this?

- Devil's already got his piece, innit?

I don't need to give him another one by feeling guilty about it.

Anyways, it's not about what you

show men, it's about what you don't show 'em.

Men like mystery.

Oh, and by the way, no one wants you to be like Tracey.

Just be yourself.

Now stop your fucking crying.

I'll give you a lift home.

- I will, I'll treat her like a princess.

- Ade: You don't know how to

treat anybody like a princess.

- Ah, Holly, please sit down.

- I've really got to get going.

- Why?The night is young.

The moon is but a twinkle within

thine eye.

Asseyez-vous, please.

What time is it, Ade?

- Hmm, tick-tock, it's a drink

o'clock... [laughs]

- On the dot.

Come on... [taps chair cushion]

You know, you've been making

such splendid progress.

Let's celebrate.

- O.K., but I'm not drinking.

- Just one... Little sip?

There... - Mmm...

- You've got a phenomenal look about you.

You could be an actress.

- Really?

- Absolutely.

I've done a couple...

- Sometimes I throw V.I.P.

Parties and it's an opportunity

for my most talented girls to

make rather a lot of cash

on the side.

- [sighs] Or on top.

- So what am i, an actress

or a prostitute?

- No need to get defensive.

- Are you two at it again?

- Uh... - No.

- Yeah.

- You, you couldn't even pull

your own fucking hair, darling.

- [laughs]: Pull your hair.

- Pathetic.

- "Pathetic"?

That don't even touch the fucking sides.

[music plays]

[music stops]

[traffic passing]

- Stop fussing with me.

I know how to walk up

the stairs... Come on.

- Waiter: Something to drink?

- Flynn: Yes.

- Shall I get the sommelier?

- No, you could get us a nice bottle of Pinot Grigio.

- Do you know what you're gonna order?

- [chuckles]

- Oh, sorry, do you want me to read you the menu?

- That won't be necessary.

I'll have the faggots in brine.

I'm kidding, Holly.

- [sighs]

- I thought prostitutes and

minge-munchers and strippers

were supposed to be good fun.

- [scoffs]: Don't call me that.

Anyway, that's what I wanted to

to talk to you about.

I'm still in denial that I have

to take my clothes off to make a living.

- Ah, well, for one thing, you

don't have to, you've chosen to

do it and secondly, stop being so bloody puritanical.

Isadora Duncan danced naked

in front of prime ministers and kings.

- Wasn't she strangled to death

by her own scarf?

- Yes, but if you play your

cards right, you too can have a glamorous death.

- [chuckles]: That doesn't make

me feel any better about being

a pole dancer.

- The road to success is paved

with humiliation.

The sooner you accept that, the

easier the journey will get.

Now, let's have a toast to your

new profession.

- Man: Christopher Flynn,

the wunderlust king!

[slurring]: What bloody cave

have you been hiding in?

- Holly, this is

Lorcan O'neil...

A very old crony of mine.

He's won a pulitzer prize.

He also taught me the finer art

of fellatio as an undergrad at Oxford.

Relax, Holly, I'm kidding again.

- [crunching]: No, he's not.

I'm loving the gray, by the way.

- Ah, I hadn't noticed.

Been too busy fumbling around

in the dark.

- Waiter: Sir?

- So, how have you been puffing

yourself up these days?

- Why, haven't you seen the

series I've had published in

the telegraph this month?

- No... Very good, thank you.

- Shame, it's fucking good.

Actually, I'm here with my

publisher to celebrate the fact

that my new novel has been

short-listed for the

booker prize.

- How very nice for you.

So you'll be needing a new

mantelpiece in your six-storey,

semi-detached Chelsea manor,

won't you?

- Well, it's seven, old boy,

and distinctly detached.

- I'm starving, can we order?

- Forgive me, I'm going.

Holly, it was lovely to meet you, and Christopher, such a

very nice surprise to see you after all these years.

- Nice to see you too.

- Waiter: Are you ready to order?

- Um, I'll have a hamburger and fries.

- And I'll have the pheasant,

thank you.

Burger and fries are not going

to look very good

in your g-string.

- Maybe I'm trying to get fired.

- They'll never fire you, you're too beautiful.

- How do you know what

I look like?

- Andre may have mentioned it once or twice.

- Oh, yeah?

What color's my hair?

- Ah, that's a tough one.

Let me see, I'll have to guess,

uh... Blonde?

- No, I'm not.

I'm a brunette.

- You're not clever enough to be a brunette.

- [laughs]

- [laughs]

You know he's in love with you, don't you?

- I think it is you he's in love with.

He can't stop talking about

your poetry.

- Well, he lives in a fantasy

world, doesn't he?

- Don't we all?

[music plays]

[water dripping...]

- [laughing and speaking Russian]

[continues speaking Russian]

...I, I love this guy!

- [crying]

[sobbing loudly...]

[car alarm beeps]

[music plays]

- "Property Developer" my ass.

Filthy little excuse for a man.

[music plays]

[A.K. Singing in Russian]

[A.K. Continues singing in Russian...]

[music plays]

[car alarm beeps]

[A.K. Continues singing in Russian...]

[music plays]

[ignition starts]

[doorbell buzzes, knocking]

[knocking harder]

[thud]

[music and singing stop]

- That's it!

I'm never doing this again,

you fucking gyppo!

- Well, you fucked it up!

Who the fuck told you to open the door...?

- Find someone else to do your dirty work!

- Ah, speaking of dirty work,

I've got to go, I'm going to be late.

[frozen peas crackle]

- You know, in my country we

have a saying, that a man

without a mustache is like

woman with mustache.

- I'm sick of your Ukrainian

folklore-- fuck you!

- Take Juliette...

She's a nice girl.

She's also got a swamp up there.

[music plays]

She cares a lot about starving

children in Africa...

And she don't know she's starving too.

[music stops]

[door squeaks open]

- Chloe: Oh, my god, what

happened to you?

- What are you doing here?

- I've come to tell you something.

- Well, make it fast.

I've got work to do.

- I'm leaving.

- Leaving what?

- School, home, everything.

I'm gonna travel the world, find out who I am.

- [laughs]

You wouldn't leave the driveway

without mummy and daddy's permission.

- I've told mum everything.

- Aren't you the brave girl.

- I've gotta start somewhere.

- I just can't believe you'd do it, that's all.

- I'd thought you'd be happy for me.

- I am happy for you.

But how can you afford to travel the world?

- Mum gave me money.

- [scoffs]

You're so weak.

[music plays]

So, how does that work?

You stick around for a few more

years of fatherly affection...

You don't say anything about it

and get a nice prize.

Well done!

I shouldn't have said that.

I'm sorry.

Good for you.

- Is it O.K. If I leave some

things with you before I go?

- Yeah, come by whenever.

I've got to get to work.

- [speaking Indian dialect]

- [children laughing, playing]

- [speaking Indian dialect...]

...Get out!

- Mum, how do I look?

- [gasps, shouts in Indian dialect]

Where did you get these clothes?

[shouting in Indian dialect]

[phone rings]

- [chutya shouting in Indian dialect on phone...]

- It's for you.

- Who the bloody did this to you?

I'll bloody fix him good.

- I'd better get out front.

[shouting on phone continues...]

- I told you not to call me at work.

Yeah, well, I'm busy,

busy, busy!

- [shouting in Indian dialect]

...Daughter bloody prostitute!

- Well, I'll deal with Lakshmi when I get home, all right,

yeah, enough, all right!

[pot clatters]

- Dinner is served!

[children laughing, playing]

[music plays]

[music plays]

[music plays]

- [sobbing]

- [inhales deeply]

Oh, Juliette.

Bloody hell.

- [crying]

Sardeep...

[music plays]

Sardeep...

[pills rattling]

[music plays]

[rattling]

- What the bloody is this?

- What does it look like?

- What are they doing in your

bloody pocket?

- What are you doing in my bloody pocket?

- You, with your ridiculous

pre-occupation...

- Woman: Excuse me?

- ...With starving children of

Africa-- bloody Africa--

you can't even look after your

bloody self!

- Woman: Excuse me.

- You're a hypocrite!

- Look who's talking?

- I put you on a pedestal.

- But it's your pedestal,

Sardeep, not mine.

- Don't you bloody

interrupt me!

This is a respectable establishment.

You can't show up here

with pills in your pocket and a bloody black eye,

frightening off the customers!

- Quite right.

- Thank you. I'm an Indian and this is a

bloody Indian establishment!

I work so very hard every day!

Every day, for what, huh?

My wife screams at me from the moment I get up

to the moment I go to sleep!

All I want is a little bloody

peace and quiet in my life!

And this is not a bloody ashram!

- [gasps]

I will not work for a bigot!

I'm going to Africa... And

I don't care what you, or you, or anyone else thinks about it!

If I have to rob a bank to pay my way, then so be it!

[store bell jingles]

- Woman: This is not...

- Piss off.

[music plays]

- Francine: Listen, if women

weren't so fucking boring,

harry wouldn't be in business.

- [Man with Spanish accent] I hates woman, just like

my mami and my sister.

- I don't hate women.

I just feel sorry for 'em.

They don't use their imagination, you know?

Men like strange, they like new.

I see it every night, don't I?

- You know how much pizza

I eat every week?

49 for the delivery to find one I like.

- What, you like the delivery boy?

- I love the delivery boys.

In one night, I eat 20 pizza

because the same boy's coming.

You know what I say to him?

- No. - Call me "Marguerita" tonight.

- [laughs]

Honey, you show me a beautiful

girl and I'll show you a man

who's tired of fucking her.

- Are you sure?

- You want varnish?

- Talk is cheap.

- Simple, innit?

Variety is the spice of life.

Am I right or am I right?

- She's forever right.

[muffled music inside club]

[traffic passing]

- Doorman: Hi, Holly, late again?

- How much do we have?

- [indistinct]

[music plays]

- Madonna: ♪ ...Let my mouth go where it wants to ♪

♪ Give it up, do as I say... ♪

- Is that Holly?

- ♪ ...I'll give you love, I'll hit you like a truck ♪

♪ I'll give you love, I'll teach you how to... ♪

♪ [moaning]

♪ I'd like to put you in a trance... ♪

- Good girl.

[whistles]

- ♪ ...Erotic, erotic

♪ Put your hands all over my body ♪

♪ Erotic, erotic

♪ Put your hands all over my body ♪

♪ Erotic, erotic

♪ Put your hands all over--

[record scratches, music ends]

[general conversations]

[music plays]

♪ Oh, baby, baby

♪ Oh, baby, baby

[music plays]

♪ My loneliness is killing me ♪

♪ I must confess, I still believe ♪

[whooping and clapping]

♪ When I'm not with you...

- Man: Come on, Britney!

- ♪ I lose my mind

♪ Give me a sign

♪ Hit me, baby, one more time

♪ Oh, baby, baby

♪ Oh, baby, baby...

[knocking]

- Yo, Professor!

[music ends]

Delivery boy.

[music plays]

We've got...

Ripe olives from turkey.

We've got...

One loaf organic bread brown.

We've got...

A fruit basket from the lord,

all sprinkled with nectars...

A special for my blind man.

[music plays]

- Rubbish, isn't it?

- No...

In fact, it's brilliant.

I want to read more.

- There aren't any more.

[music plays]

- There are such things as braille, you know?

What's the point of sitting here

feeling sorry for yourself?

I would give my eyes to write like you.

- O.K., O.K.

Go, go...

[sighs] Thank you for helping

the fucking blind man!

- Can I just put away this for you?

- Please, just go... Go!

[piano playing...]

- Dance teacher?

Using the times.

Good, ladies...

[music plays]

...Up, that's... Right round.

Good...

[mouthing words, ♪...]

[children laughing, shouting]

...And around...

...Four...

Tight fifth... Through...

And back to the last.

[piano playing continues...]

[teacher vocalizing melody]

[piano playing continues...]

...Around... Around...

And through...

Good.

O.K., thank you.

[clapping]

Thank you, shaun.

Right, see you tomorrow, thanks.

[changing tv channels...]

[laughter and voices from tv...]

- [sighs deeply]

[pills rattle]

[voices on tv continue...]

[static from tv...]

- [humming melody to himself]

[thud]

Oh!

[whispering]: I'm so, so sorry.

I'm so, so sorry.

I'm sorry.

- Wife: Have you done your...

Homework?

- [panting] Oh...

Mrs. Goldfarb...

Are you trying to seduce me?

- Come here, you naughty

little boy.

- [panting with excitement]

- Come on.

Over!

What are you?

- Naughty.

- A naughty... Little... Boy!

Say it!

- A naughty!

- Naughty little boy!

- Ow, not that hard!

Oh, stop it!

Fuckin'' ell!

[music plays]

[music plays]

- [snorts]

[music plays]

- Two men fall through

the chimney...

One is dirty, one is clean.

Which one needs to take a bath?

- You need to take a bath...

And stop sneaking around like some perv.

Why don't you just tell her?

- How can you take that dude

seriously when he stopped getting laid when he was 32?

- Sex isn't everything.

- It is in Africa.

- You're a sick man.

- Thank you, finally.

I traveled seven seas

to hear this, you know?

And you traveled nowhere

and you're lost.

Just don't get everyone lost with you.

[doorbell buzzes]

By appointment only.

[door thuds]

- I'm here to speak to miss Juliette.

- That's also by appointment.

- Do you beat her?

- Only if she pays me.

- Aree chutya, look at you, you piece of scum.

Do you know how lucky you are to have a girl like this, huh?

You should bloody well treat her better.

With izat-- you know, respect.

- Is that right, Randy Ghandi?

- You bloody foreigner, don't you talk to me like that!

- Juliette: Sardeep?

Hello.

- Juliette.

- He's all right, let him in.

- How are you, you O.K.?

- Fine, thank you. - Good.

- [clears throat]

- [clears throat]

[lighter clicks]

- Please forgive me for saying

those horrible, horrible things to you.

You're a very nice girl,

Juliette, and I really want

to make it up to you.

[sighs nervously]

Well, bloody open it.

- "Dear miss Honan...

Thank you for your interest in the peace corps.

Your application has been

accepted...

And we are delighted to offer

you a post in Nairobi working as part of the health care program

that focuses on children orphaned by aids"

Oh, my god, Sardeep.

I don't understand.

I didn't...

- I did... And I hope

you don't mind... I, uh, forged

your bloody signature.

[both laugh]

And, uh, you're going to need

one of these.

[paper rustling]

- [tearfully whispers]

Oh, my god.

[sniffles]

How much do I owe you?

- Oh, nothing, nothing, uh,

my, uh, charity can was heavier

than yours.

[snorts, laughing]

- [whispers]: Oh, thank you so much.

- Oh, Juliette.

I so wish I was coming with you.

It's going to be wonderful with

all those black African,

undernourished, skinny, skinny,

rickety children.

[doorbell buzzes]

Oh, Juliette, you're such

a wonderful girl.

- Oh, look what dragged in

the cats.

- All right, Rusky.

Is the schoolgirl in?

- Yeah, yeah, she's in her room

skinning foxes.

- Making you a nice, new

Russian hat, is she?

- Ah, everyone east of Berlin

is making fur Russian hats

for K.G.B.

- Oh, excuse me.

Am I interrupting something?

- No, no, that's all right.

- This is for Holly.

She forgot her tips last night.

- I am her manager.

Yes, my little slut.

- I heard that, man-whore.

- Envelopes, envelopes,

everybody's getting envelopes.

Where the fuck is my envelope?

[doorbell buzzes]

They're just in.

[offensive swearing in Russian]

...Only when you eat a lemon do

you appreciate what sugar is.

Life is a paradox.

But is it, really?

Is the contradictions within and around us really a form of

dissonance, or just another word for "accord" in a language

we're yet to discover...

A language we're yet to

learn... A language we have

been deprived of.

We live in a mistaken world and

it doesn't have to be so.

You can be an academic and come

to this realization by reading

books, or you can discover

this new rebel intelligence by

waking up in your own vomit...

Either way, you cannot lose.

Without filth, there can be

no wisdom.

Without darkness, no light.

In my country we have a saying,

"if the devil is powerless,

send him a woman"

- Oh, I forgot.

This came for you in the post yesterday.

- And then, I get my envelope.

...Yeah, yeah, who the fuck am i?

But this song, the next song is

dedicated to a dead poet.

[whooping and cheering]

[music plays]

[no dialog, ♪...]

Oh, you know it's easy for a soul searcher to leave

his hometown...

Where the folks bang their hands

and figure much, men like

Kierkegaard and Nietzsche.

All these poor bastards that

never even get laid are taken seriously.

[whooping and cheering]

And like, what the fuck can you

learn from them?

But where is the true artistic gurus?

[whooping and cheering]

[music plays]

Well, I prefer madmen...

Like this bum on the street...

♪ I met the other day

Who says that's so like battles

of the rose.

Well, some of them are from

the east...

♪ And some of them are from

♪ the west

♪ Just need to charge

♪ one another

♪ And stick it closer

♪ to the center

♪ Where some kind of

♪ mystical cross-pollination

♪ going on

♪ Creating something

♪ out of nothing

♪ Like works of art

♪ or the religion

♪ Straight out of nothing

Yeah!

♪ My strange, strange uncle's

♪ from abroad

♪ Yes, I never met them, but

♪ I took everything they wrote

♪ and I'll never forget 'em, oh ♪

With chorus: ♪ Through the mystical communication ♪

♪ Deep within it,

♪ all comes through

♪ Forming underground railroad

♪ for our ultimate breakthrough ♪

♪ Doo, doo

♪ Doo, doo

♪ Ra-ba-da-doo, da-da, da-doo

♪ Doo, doo

♪ Doo, doo, doo...

♪ Hey

[music plays]

♪ My strange nephew's

♪ from beyond

♪ I'll meet them on a

♪ cosmos street

♪ And we will drink to

♪ how we never told you

♪ Don't trust a plastic beat

♪ Through the mystical

♪ communication

♪ Deep within it,

♪ all comes through

♪ Forming underground railroad

♪ for our ultimate breakthrough ♪

♪ Doo, doo

♪ Doo, doo

♪ Ra-ba-da-doo, da-da, da-doo

♪ Doo, doo

♪ Doo, doo, doo...

♪ Hey

[music plays]

[music plays]

♪ Die, die, die!

[music plays]

[music plays]

♪ Ohh...

♪ Da-ooh, die, die

♪ Open eyes

♪ They are still looking,

♪ they are still finding

♪ A few un-poisoned hearts

♪ No matter where

♪ you are exiled

♪ No matter where you are exiled. ♪

[music fades]

[cheering and applause...]

Straight... Outta...

Nothing!

[cheering fades...]

Straight out of nothing.

You see, my friend, feeling good

is just as contagious

as feeling bad.

Two sides of a same coin...

The lesson.

So if your ship comes in...

Ohuenno.

Let's get as many people

on board as possible.

We're all in the same pizdetz

boat here, and if it sinks,

we're all going down together.

...Extra maximum double radical

respect straight outta Ukraine

to my new neighborhood jam,

rewind!

[tape rewinding...]

When I die... [chuckles]

When I die.

[mumbling...]

- Man: And...

- For the fucking hell of it.

- Man: ...Action!

[music plays]

[indistinct shouting]

- A.K.: ♪ Up top

[music plays]

♪ Whop-ah

[music plays]

♪ I've... Been reading

♪ some texts in my dreams,

♪ they went for pages

♪ I've been watching the wolves, ♪

♪ they broke out of cages

♪ And fallowing, dirty, useless clown ♪

♪ Gadjo gets lost

♪ in a gypsy part of town

[deeper voice]: ♪ Be I gagged or bound, lobotomized, sedated ♪

♪ My foundations are too deep

♪ to penetrate it

♪ Be I gagged or bound,

♪ lobotomized, sedated

♪ My foundations are too deep

♪ to penetrate it

♪ Let's go...

- [woman singing in foreign language...]

- ♪ Gypsy part of town

♪ A gypsy part of town

- [woman continues singing in foreign language...]

- ♪ Gypsy part of town

- [women singing in foreign language...]

♪ So let the girl scouts lip-synch about the freedom ♪

♪ That is just the way

♪ you want them,

♪ but you'll see them

[indistinct]

♪ You will see them

♪ in a different part of town

♪ Gah...

♪ [indistinct] ...Frown

♪ And gadjo gets lost

♪ in a gypsy part of town

♪ Let's go... [echo]

- [woman singing in foreign language...]

- ♪ Gypsy part of town

♪ A gypsy part of town

♪ Gypsy part of town

♪ Oh... [indistinct]

- [woman continues singing in foreign language...]

- ♪ Whoa...

[music plays]

- [man scatting...]

[music plays]

- [woman singing in foreign language...]

♪ So I kept on reading

♪ the texts in my dreams,

♪ it went for pages

♪ I looked at the guards,

♪ they were burning stages

♪ I smiled at the world,

♪ there'll still be no changes

♪ I winked at the wolves,

♪ they broke out of cages

♪ Let's go

[music plays]

♪ Gadjo gets lost in a gypsy part of town. ♪

[music plays]

[shouting in Russian...]