All language subtitles for Bob.Hearts.Abishola.S02E17.720p.WEBRip.x264-ION10

Previously on
Bob Hearts Abishola...

You are going to Nigeria
this summer.

I am?

You will behave and represent
this family well.

You will also call me
every day.

Of course.

Before the plane takes off,
after it lands,

before, during and after
every car trip.

Yes, Mum.

It does not matter
how things are

with your father and me.

This trip will be
good for you.

That is what matters.

Thank you, Mum.

And I will never be against you.

Okay, Mama.

Be safe.

Yes, Mum.

And, Dele...

...I will be watching
everything you do.

Hello, Mum.

[gasps] You look skinny.

I'm fine.Are you sure?

Tell Granny to make you
eba and okra stew.

You'll be nice and chubby
by the weekend.

I haven't seen Granny yet.

Weren't you supposed
to see her yesterday?

Dad got us tickets
to a football match.

Uh, Gran didn't mind.

Was she smiling
when she said that?

Because if she was,
that means she does mind.

No, I can't right now.
I'm talking to my mum.

Who's that?

Oh, that's Bola.

Who is Bola?

My sister.Oh.

Do you want to say hi?No.

Oh, is that Dele?
Yes.

Look how skinny he is.

Before he left, we should
have fattened him up

like a Christmas goose.

UNCLE TUNDE:
Dele,

this is Morenike.

She will be renting your room
while you are gone.

What?

Hello, Morenike.Hello, Dele.

Hello, Morenike.
Excuse us.

Why did you not
tell me this?

I'm sorry, when did this
become your apartment?

I know you are sad
at Dele being gone,

but you can be happy
knowing that his room

is not sitting empty,
gobbling money.

["Ifanla" by Sola Akingbola
playing]

Ah, good morning.Hey, good morning.

I thought you'd have left
for work already.

Oh, you're right.

I'm late. Better call my boss.

Hey, Bob, is it okay if I hang
out with Abishola for a minute?

[chuckles] Very funny.

Do you mind?
I'm on the phone with my boss.

[chuckles]

I should get your mother's
workout ready.

Actually, she just left.
What?

She and Christina
went to Mom's house

to take care of some stuff.

[sighs] Why didn't you call me?

I just found out myself.

When will they be back?

Not until later.

So what am I supposed to do,

be paid to sit around
and do nothing?

It's the American dream.

You know I cannot do that.

First there's a stranger
in Dele's room,

and now you have ruined
my whole day.

Wait, who's in Dele's room?

Auntie and Uncle rented it
out to a cousin.

What? You didn't tell me that.

[mocking]:
I just found out myself.

Look, I'm sorry things
got screwed up.

But if you want,
I could call my boss

and see if I could
take the day off.

Don't be ridiculous.

There's no reason for
the both of us to be useless.

[grunting]

You got this, Christina.

Almost there. You can do it.

[both grunting]

Mission accomplished.

Now, was that so hard?Yeah.

It was very hard.

Yeah, well, try carrying
the whole family on your back.

See how that feels.

Listen, will you get me
that blue box in the closet?

It's on the top shelf.

You made me carry you up
an entire flight of stairs

to grab you a box?

Couldn't I have just
brought it down to you?

Hindsight's 20/20, sweetie.

[sighs]:
Oh, boy.

It's, um, been a while, huh?

Yep.

I guess the last time
you were here was P.S.

P.S.?

Oh... pre-stroke.

Cute.

I bet you miss
this place.

Oh, it's just a house.

Yeah, but it's
your house.

Not for long.

Oh, come on, Mom.

I don't think God's in any rush
to get you to heaven. [chuckles]

I'm not dying.
I'm selling the place.

What?

You-you can't just
sell the house.

Now, don't get
all Christina on me.

But this is our family home.

We should discuss this
as a family.

Pass.

Okay.

I think I know where
this is coming from.

There have been a lot of
changes this past year,

a lot of stuff that you
can't do anything about,

so you want to have control
over this one thing.

You know, for someone so young,
you're very insightful.

Thank you.

[chuckles]

It is a wonderful place
that has anything

you could possibly need
for your daily life.

What is it called again?

Costco.

Yes.

We will take you.

The first time can be
an overwhelming experience.

Thank you for letting me
stay here.

And giving me
this guidance.

Ah, much like Costco,

we have wisdom in bulk.Mm.

I love this American stew.
What is it called?

It is not American.
This is ogbono.

Oh. Well, whatever it is,

it is wonderful.

Perhaps I should make you
something else?

Oh, no, Auntie.

I just need to get used to
America's more subdued flavors.

Subdued?

I think it is very smart
you have

immersed yourself
in the culture,

with the mild food,
the American decorations.

Even your accents.

What is wrong with our accents?

Oh, nothing.

I love the way
you say "ogbono."

Ogbono.

Mm-mm. Ogbono.

Ogbono.Ogbono.

Og-bo-no!

Never mind.

Just pass the fufu.

Fufu. Ah.

I just love
your American accents.

[speaking Yoruba tensely]

Hello?

The wife?

Yes.

She hang up on you?

Yes.

You know, before
I dated Abishola,

I would've said call her
right back, but now...

You have to let them stew.

You have to let 'em stew.

Like a tough cut of beef.

Doesn't ignoring them
just make them angrier?

That would be impossible.

Nigerian women
start out furious

and make their way down to,

"I will not kill you
in your sleep."

Yeah, the trick is to
diffuse the situation

before she has
a chance to get mad.

How do you do that?

Yeah, that's the piece
of the puzzle

I haven't figured out yet.

Oh, I love puzzles.

You're kidding. Me, too.

I recently finished
a breathtaking one

of marine life.

Ah, that's a lot of blue.

I started with
the objects: coral,

clown fish,
the diver's flippers.

Smart.
[chuckles]

What?

You two need girlfriends.

They could help
with the puzzles.

[chuckles]:
Yeah.

Oh, my God,
we do need girlfriends.

I did a surprise Taco Tuesday
on a Thursday.

Ooh, girl,
you're out of control.

Abishola.Hello.

What are you doing here?
You don't have work today.

I was not needed at Bob's house,

so I came by to see if I could
pick up some extra hours.

Wait, you had
the day off from work,

so you came to work
to ask for more work?

Yes.

This is a hospital.

You come here
if you're being paid or dying.

Leave this place immediately.

Go.

I'm just not good
at being worthless.

How do the two of you do it?

[scoffs] Well, first of all,
don't call it worthless.

And second, I go to a museum
or a ball game.

Gloria and I sometimes
go to the jazz club.

Mm!

Yeah, we get all dressed up,
have a couple of cocktails.

It's fun.Good worthless fun.

Fine, I'll go with you tonight.

Tonight?

Oh, I-I would have to
change some things around.Okay.

Change those things. What time?

What do you think?

Aw, what the hell.

Let's keep this crazy
Taco Thursday train running.

But if you do this,

you will have to adhere
to some rules.

I like rules.

First off, we know
the music's loud.

Don't keep saying it.Okay.

And don't count
how many drinks I've had.

I already know it's too many.

Okay.

And don't be one of those women
that flirts with the musicians.

That's my thing.

And don't play air instruments
along with the band.

That's my thing.

Oh... wait.

You can't throw these away.

These are my first
ballet slippers.

Are you gonna cry
at every piece of junk

we take out of these boxes?

No.

Oh...

Christina.

Well, I don't understand.

You're feeling better.

You can move back in soon.

Why can't you just stay
here till you die?

Because I'll be alone.

By the time you kids
figure out I'm dead,

I'll already be haunting
the next family.

We-We'll hire a
cleaning lady.

She'll find the body.

All I'm saying is,
none of you came around P.S.

P.S.?

"Pre-stroke."
It's yourstupid term.

We saw you all the time.

At work.
Because you were paid to.

And it was a job that came
with benefits: seeing you.

Knock it off.

All of you left this house
the minute you could

and you never looked back.

Now it's my turn.

Okay, I get it.
You were lonely.

But what if I moved
back in here with you?

You'd do that?

No.

Wow. If we weren't
already engaged,

I'd say you were
out of my league.

You can still say it.Hey, stand there.

Let me take your picture.

Uh, you know what?

I don't like the lighting.
Move over there.

Bob.
I'm just excited.

You're going out with the girls.
You never go out with the girls.

[camera clicks][doorbell rings]

They're here. It's happening.

[door opens]BOB:
Hey!

[overlapping greetings]

BOB:
Wow, you ladies
look wonderful.

GLORIA: Thank you.Wait, smile.

BOB:
Uh, I don't like the
lighting. Move over there.

Bob, let them in.

Ah...Oh, look at you.

Look at you.

Look at us.

GLORIA:
Oh.

Boom. Can I get you ladies
anything before you go? Wine?

Beer? Mixed drink?

I don't think we
have time for that.

Do you have champagne?

I can rustle up some bubbles.Mmm.

I'll have a glass.

We should get going.
We don't want to be late

for our worthless night out.

Wrong. We don't
want to be early.

The only people who show
up to the club early

are tourists and prostitutes.

And you certainly
aren't... tourists.

Sorry, just excited.

Well, this is nice.Mm-hmm.

All we need now
is some music.

Hold, please.

["Ladies' Night"
by Kool & the Gang playing]All right, Sock Man.

[laughter]Mmm.

Bob, I can always count
on you for the good stuff.

Only the best for
my gal's pals.

Seriously, make
yourselves at home

and hang out for as
long as you want.

Are you sure about that?

Unamargarita for la señorita.

Gracias.

Our house Cabernet.

Thank you, dear.

And an old fashioned.

Thank you, Sock Man.

Bob, this is so sweet.No problem.

No, I am telling you
it is too sweet.

Make it again.

[laughter]Okay, okay.

Famous Bobs. Marley.

Uh, Newhart.

Wheeler.

[imitates buzzer sound]

Bob Wheeler is a nobody.

Drink!Drink!

He is my nobody.

Oh.
[laughs]

Mm-mm.

Next category.Mm-hmm.Mm-hmm.

Nigerian students
who were accepted

into every Ivy League school.

Harold Ekeh.

Oludamilola Oluwadara Adekeye.

Oh, come on, y'all.

Drink!Drink!

[laughs]

This is so much fun.

Yeah. It's nice to see you
cut loose for once.

KEMI:You may not
believe me,

but Abishola used to be
the life of the party.

I don't believe you.Mm-hmm.

KEMI:
Old Abishola
told jokes,

sang, she was
a beautiful dancer.

What?

But she died a slow,

boring death
many, many years ago.

When I had Dele,

Tayo and I were already
struggling to get by.

Then Tayo left

and I didn't have time

for foolish things anymore.

Sometime life just gets
in the way, huh?

[jazz music playing]

Ooh! I love this song.

[imitates strumming bass]

Oh, here we go.

[coughing, sputtering]

What is wrong?

I-I had some of the food
that Morenike brought.

I have one word for it.

[screams]

It's not you.

The girl has the
devil's taste buds.

It was so embarrassing, uh,

sweating and crying
in front of her.

You have nothing to be
embarrassed about.

We spent more time in Nigeria
than she has been alive.

I marched for my country's
independence.

And I was almost Miss Lagos.

Well, if the water
commissioner's daughter

had not entered,
you would have won.

If I'd known his bribe
was going to be that big,

I would not have
learned to juggle.

Nigeria is in our bones.

Uh, no matter how we speak,
h-how we eat,

or how much time spent away.

Nothing can change
what is in our hearts.

Nothing.

Tunde, look at the time.

Oh, The Masked Singeris on.

Oh, I'll make the Jiffy Pop.[laughs]

Who do you think
they will unmask tonight?

The giant pelican.

And I am convinced
it is Macaulay Culkin.

What has happened to me?

I know the star of Home Alone,

yet I cannot pronounce "ogbono."

Ogbono.

How's the fried rice?

Pretty good.

I know you don't think
I was the best mother.

Wow.

No. I... I just thought
there was more.

There is, but I thought
there would be some protest.

Just to be polite.

You are the best mother.

You're lying,
but it's still nice to hear.

You know, it's been
kind of great

spending so much time
with you kids

while I've been at Bob's.

It has been.

In a weird way,
I feel like the stroke

has given me a second chance.

It's given all of us
a second chance.

And for the record, you
weren't so horrible.

Go back to lying.

No, I mean, you didn't bake
cookies or check my homework,

and you kind of missed a lot
of what my therapist called

"significant milestones."

Bring it home, will you?

But after Dad died,
I saw you pull yourself together

and get up and go back
to MaxDot.

I really didn't have
much choice.

You did.

You could have broken down
and curled up in a ball.

But you ran
the business.

You kept us afloat.

Thank you, honey.

You know,

the few things I
like about myself,

I get from you.

You know, your strength,
your work ethic.

You never take no
for an answer.

Hmm. Neither do you.

Yeah. And I have the
restraining orders to prove it.

GLORIA:
Ooh, that's my jam.

All right, get up, y'all. Let me
see if y'all know this dance.

Abishola doesn't dance.

Normally that is true,
but I have been drinking.

[laughs] Come on, y'all, help me
move this table out the way.

Come on, come on,
push, push, push.

All right, y'all.
We gonna do the Detroit Hustle.

You got it? Follow me.

Here we go. And salsa.

And out and up and salsa.

And toe and toe,

and cross, cross,
cross, cross, slide.

Cross, cross,
cross, cross, slide.

Slow down, slow down, slow down.

Oh, no, the liquor
has stolen my rhythm.

[laughs]I do not think it's the liquor.

[laughter]

All right,
I got mixers and snacks.

And I had this piñata
in my garage,

and I thought,
"I'll just bring it over."

Great. I need you to
walk those drinks out,

and we're 86'ed on ice.

Copy.[phone ringing]

Oh, oh. It's Dele, it's Dele.

Bob, please turn down the music.

[clears throat]

Hello, Dele.

[chuckles]
E kaale,Mum.

Did you have a good day?

Oh, it's, uh, it's morning here.

[laughs]:
Oh. It is.

When you get back,

you have to help me learn
this dance that Gloria knows.

You want me to help you dance?

Ah, Dele doesn't think
I know how to dance, either.

[laughter]

That's because you cannot.

Ah-ah-ah. You are laughing

at your mother.

No, I'm just happy
to see you happy.

Aw. And I am happy that you
are happy that I am happy.

Oh, I love you, Dele.

I miss you

very much.

I love you, too, Mum.

You do?

[chuckling]:
Yes.

Good. I love my mother,
but I do not like her.

Do you like me?

KEMI:
Okay, that's enough.

Bye-bye, Dele.

ABISHOLA:
But I want to talk to my son.

KEMI:
I'm saving you.

You must never tell
your children the truth.

I'm glad Mum is having
a good time.

Maybe too good a time.

Another reason why you should
stay here with me.

I hope you enjoy the soup.

I tried to make it
less spicy for you.

[strains]:
Yes, very mild.

Here, have more pepper.

Oh. No, please.

Uh, ladies first.

How thoughtful.

It is so enjoyable going in.

I'm sure it will be
just as enjoyable coming out.

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