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1
00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:14,878
- Who's that?
- The new judge. He arrived yesterday.
2
00:00:17,344 --> 00:00:19,765
- Good day to you.
- We kiss your hands...
3
00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:25,241
- He's ajudge?
- Yes... a judge.
4
00:00:25,472 --> 00:00:28,952
- Is he dangerous?
- No, no... he's a gentleman.
5
00:00:29,056 --> 00:00:31,195
Why did you speak so quietly then?
6
00:00:31,360 --> 00:00:35,070
Moron, because I got a cold!
I lost my voice!
7
00:00:43,616 --> 00:00:49,814
GIOVANNONA LONG-THIGH,
HONORABLY DISHONORED
8
00:00:55,521 --> 00:00:58,489
You're a local,
what weather can we expect?
9
00:00:58,625 --> 00:01:00,763
What would I know?
10
00:01:22,050 --> 00:01:23,872
Hold this, Laganà...
11
00:01:24,610 --> 00:01:26,879
What barbarians!
12
00:01:35,010 --> 00:01:37,792
- This needs analysing immediately...
- Drugs?
13
00:01:37,922 --> 00:01:41,883
No, dirty river water.
Send it to the Catania hygiene office.
14
00:01:42,114 --> 00:01:43,609
Will do.
15
00:02:22,019 --> 00:02:23,612
Come in.
16
00:02:24,195 --> 00:02:25,821
Good day, judge.
17
00:02:25,955 --> 00:02:29,370
The Catania report has come,
the water analysis.
18
00:02:29,475 --> 00:02:33,883
- Good, have you read it?
- Yes, it says the water's polluted.
19
00:02:34,019 --> 00:02:37,848
What a surprise, we didn't need
Catania rocket science to learn that!
20
00:02:38,051 --> 00:02:39,742
I want to know the cause.
21
00:02:39,843 --> 00:02:44,251
The report talks of
dangerous colored substances.
22
00:02:44,483 --> 00:02:47,134
The pollution is caused
by industrial effluent.
23
00:02:47,332 --> 00:02:50,081
It probably comes
from a paint factory.
24
00:02:50,243 --> 00:02:52,632
Great, we'll strike immediately...
25
00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:56,220
You're local, do you know
of a factory near the river?
26
00:02:56,324 --> 00:03:00,415
As far as I know there's only one...
the cheese factory.
27
00:03:00,739 --> 00:03:02,495
The Straccolone?!
28
00:03:06,308 --> 00:03:08,446
SCANDAL IN SICILY
29
00:03:08,900 --> 00:03:10,788
JUDGE FINDS POLLUTED STREAM
30
00:03:10,852 --> 00:03:12,761
COMING FROM CHEESE FACTORY
31
00:03:12,965 --> 00:03:15,169
STRACCOLONE FACTORY
ORDERED SHUT
32
00:03:15,684 --> 00:03:19,841
IS CHEESE TOXIC?
INVESTIGATION UNDER WAY
33
00:03:20,837 --> 00:03:24,132
THE STRACCOLONE SCANDAL
34
00:03:36,837 --> 00:03:39,226
ITALIAN SKYSCRAPER
35
00:03:40,933 --> 00:03:44,926
Commander La Noce is in his office
and unavailable.
36
00:03:45,029 --> 00:03:48,324
I repeat, he's busy.
Try calling tomorrow.
37
00:04:30,982 --> 00:04:34,080
Careful, that typewriter
can give you a shock.
38
00:04:47,687 --> 00:04:49,574
Albertini!
39
00:04:54,630 --> 00:04:56,256
Albertini!
40
00:04:56,327 --> 00:04:57,985
Where are you?!
41
00:04:58,214 --> 00:05:02,371
- Tell me, s-s-sir...
- Albertini, try to relax.
42
00:05:02,470 --> 00:05:06,627
If you get upset you stutter, and
if you stutter I get upset, ok?
43
00:05:06,727 --> 00:05:09,727
- Yes, sir...
- Give me a cigarette.
44
00:05:23,399 --> 00:05:25,920
- They're finished...
- Ok, forget it.
45
00:05:26,279 --> 00:05:28,897
Have you found that
"honorable" whatever?
46
00:05:29,032 --> 00:05:32,709
I spent two days on the phone,
got cramps in my fingers...
47
00:05:32,839 --> 00:05:35,336
...all the "honorables"
in Italy have vanished.
48
00:05:35,336 --> 00:05:39,526
I knew it! The moment people
need their representatives...
49
00:05:39,655 --> 00:05:45,569
We have to find honorable Mr. Zuzzu,
he always helps us!
50
00:05:45,672 --> 00:05:47,166
- I did.
- Did he hit you?
51
00:05:47,272 --> 00:05:49,541
- Yes, with a pot.
- Were you in a kitchen?
52
00:05:49,640 --> 00:05:53,634
No, a clinic... it was ceramic,
what they call a chamber pot.
53
00:05:53,736 --> 00:05:55,624
- Is he sick?
- Hepatitis.
54
00:05:55,752 --> 00:05:57,607
He says it was
ourfree samples.
55
00:05:57,704 --> 00:06:00,966
Damn, you know
you shouldn't eat our cheese!
56
00:06:01,096 --> 00:06:05,319
What could I do? Our brochure
is our only edible product!
57
00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:06,626
It's too late now...
58
00:06:06,729 --> 00:06:11,071
Sure! You're relaxed
because you don't give a damn!
59
00:06:11,176 --> 00:06:15,519
But if we go bust,
your butt's on the street too!
60
00:06:15,721 --> 00:06:20,510
Try laughing when
you're in shit up to here.
61
00:06:20,936 --> 00:06:22,627
- I'm sorry, the b-b-b...
- You're an idiot!
62
00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:24,804
- What?!
- Commander...
63
00:06:24,969 --> 00:06:26,595
Were you eavesdropping?
64
00:06:26,729 --> 00:06:29,664
Do you want to know how we are?
Awful, my beauty!
65
00:06:29,801 --> 00:06:34,984
But you'll be fine, with those tits,
you've no need to worry!
66
00:06:35,176 --> 00:06:38,243
But I'm off!
I'll go abroad, emigrate!
67
00:06:38,377 --> 00:06:41,955
I'll go to Mexico, Peru,
Lake Titicaca!
68
00:06:43,145 --> 00:06:44,869
- "Titi" who?
- Who knows?
69
00:06:45,001 --> 00:06:47,652
To think I could be
on television now.
70
00:06:47,881 --> 00:06:50,849
- As an employee?
- No, a p-p-presenter.
71
00:06:50,986 --> 00:06:53,287
- I sat the exam!
- How did it go?
72
00:06:53,385 --> 00:06:56,233
- G-g-great!
- Why didn't they take you?
73
00:06:56,361 --> 00:06:59,012
They say I'm an a-a-anarchist!
74
00:07:10,345 --> 00:07:12,549
What on earth are you doing?!
75
00:07:12,873 --> 00:07:14,466
Go rest in peace!
76
00:07:14,666 --> 00:07:16,357
- Can't you sleep?
- No!
77
00:07:16,490 --> 00:07:19,938
I won't be the only one
staying awake tonight.
78
00:07:20,042 --> 00:07:22,115
I realized that!
79
00:07:31,563 --> 00:07:34,051
- Hello!
- Hello, who's there?
80
00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:37,253
- Albertini?
- You sound far away...
81
00:07:37,354 --> 00:07:38,849
Albertini!
82
00:07:41,482 --> 00:07:45,955
- Hello?
- I knew it! You were sleeping, right?
83
00:07:46,059 --> 00:07:50,314
No, not at all!
Who sleeps at 2 AM?
84
00:07:50,411 --> 00:07:54,858
I don't care, I'm awake!
How are we doing with Pedicò!
85
00:07:54,858 --> 00:07:56,647
- With who?
- With Pedicò!
86
00:07:56,778 --> 00:07:58,469
- Who's he?
- Idiot!
87
00:07:58,571 --> 00:08:01,440
Two years ago he was
industry under-secretary.
88
00:08:01,579 --> 00:08:05,353
He's an important politician,
might become a minister...
89
00:08:05,515 --> 00:08:10,218
...and we don't know him!
We have to woo certain people...
90
00:08:10,443 --> 00:08:14,021
...as you woo
beautiful women!
91
00:08:14,315 --> 00:08:18,592
You're right, but with P-Pedicò
we have an advantage...
92
00:08:18,700 --> 00:08:19,976
...we're still virgins.
93
00:08:20,075 --> 00:08:23,239
You won't be for long,
one of these days I'll bust your ass!
94
00:08:23,340 --> 00:08:27,333
No! "Virgins" in the sense that Pedicò
still hasn't received...
95
00:08:27,499 --> 00:08:31,274
...ourfree samples!
- Right, that's true...
96
00:08:31,372 --> 00:08:36,740
...but how can we reach him?
- Through someone in his party.
97
00:08:38,988 --> 00:08:40,744
Wait, wait!
98
00:08:45,132 --> 00:08:47,434
Marta, will you let me have it?
99
00:08:47,564 --> 00:08:51,655
Holy Mother, don't tempt me!
I'm doing 40 hours...
100
00:08:51,788 --> 00:08:55,137
Who cares, do six days
if you want...
101
00:08:55,276 --> 00:08:57,164
...do Milan-Sanremo,
or whatever comes to mind!
102
00:08:57,357 --> 00:09:01,579
Hello, Albertini?
I've had an idea... Albertini?
103
00:09:01,772 --> 00:09:04,871
- Moron!
- Hello, who am I talking to?
104
00:09:04,973 --> 00:09:07,940
Damn you!
Are you asleep?
105
00:09:08,045 --> 00:09:13,315
- No, I'm an insomniac!
- Good. I've had an idea.
106
00:09:13,421 --> 00:09:16,323
Do you remember Monsignor Alatri,
he organized "Kids Cityy"?
107
00:09:16,429 --> 00:09:19,276
- I was about to mention him!
- I did instead!
108
00:09:20,045 --> 00:09:21,387
We have to find him immediately.
109
00:09:21,613 --> 00:09:24,581
I want to see him tomorrow.
Call him at Rocca Pizzo...
110
00:09:24,813 --> 00:09:26,755
...and book twwo flights
for Catania.
111
00:09:26,989 --> 00:09:32,390
- Call now, at 2 AM?
- Sure... you're the insomniac.
112
00:09:34,477 --> 00:09:38,438
Yes... but not the monsignor!
113
00:09:43,245 --> 00:09:46,693
Don't call long distance,
I pay the phone bill.
114
00:09:50,862 --> 00:09:54,408
- How was your flight?
- Wonderful, monsignor...
115
00:09:54,509 --> 00:09:59,179
...a marvellous one hour.
It's longer from Catania to here!
116
00:09:59,278 --> 00:10:04,622
What a lovely day...
Would you like a 'cannolo'?
117
00:10:04,622 --> 00:10:08,812
No, don't tempt me... your offer
is generous, however.
118
00:10:09,006 --> 00:10:10,894
I hope your wife
doesn't mind...
119
00:10:10,990 --> 00:10:14,535
Why should my wife mind
if I eat an extra 'cannolo'?
120
00:10:14,670 --> 00:10:18,052
I was referring to the land you
made available for "Kids City".
121
00:10:18,222 --> 00:10:20,011
Right, I'd forgotten...
122
00:10:20,175 --> 00:10:23,273
- It's also your wife's, right?
- Yes, of course...
123
00:10:23,503 --> 00:10:25,924
But as you know,
Marta is a very devout woman.
124
00:10:26,158 --> 00:10:30,315
This comforts me greatly. Clotilde,
could you get the file, please...
125
00:10:30,479 --> 00:10:31,821
Immediately, monsignor...
126
00:10:32,047 --> 00:10:34,862
I don't think she'll oppose
this small formality...
127
00:10:35,086 --> 00:10:38,086
- What is it?
- A binding commitment...
128
00:10:38,703 --> 00:10:41,932
Your secretary mentioned
the reason for your visit...
129
00:10:42,062 --> 00:10:45,478
...so I prepared
a small statement.
130
00:10:45,615 --> 00:10:47,306
I see you don't waste time...
131
00:10:47,407 --> 00:10:51,815
My motto is, "The paths to paradise
are infinite, and should be walked well."
132
00:10:51,919 --> 00:10:54,063
That's a good one!
133
00:10:54,063 --> 00:10:59,017
- Would you care to sign?
- Yes, yes, no, no, but...
134
00:10:59,247 --> 00:11:02,094
...I don't have a pen!
- Here, a Japanese double-tip!
135
00:11:02,191 --> 00:11:05,770
- Writes 24 hours non-stop.
- Great... you son of a bitch!
136
00:11:05,871 --> 00:11:10,378
24 hours non-stop, Japanese
double-tip... here, monsignor.
137
00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:13,327
I'd like to take advantage of this
meeting to ask your advice...
138
00:11:13,424 --> 00:11:15,944
He already knows, commander...
139
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:20,495
- Did you tell him?
- No, everyone knows your problem...
140
00:11:20,656 --> 00:11:26,286
It's all lies! Chemical products
are only used to purify...
141
00:11:26,416 --> 00:11:29,995
If you can find one gram of that stuff
in our Straccolone...
142
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:33,226
...I'll become a priest!
I mean... it's slanderous!
143
00:11:33,424 --> 00:11:37,996
Sure, but in cases like this
you need top-level backing...
144
00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:41,608
- We thought of Honorable Pedicò...
- An excellent choice.
145
00:11:42,416 --> 00:11:45,765
He's a devout Christian,
a man of rare virtue.
146
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:51,655
He lives in a country villa with his
wife MariaAnnunziata, known as Mary.
147
00:11:51,792 --> 00:11:52,970
- Awoman of great...
- Virtue?
148
00:11:53,137 --> 00:11:54,315
No, stature.
149
00:11:54,512 --> 00:11:56,934
They're often accompanied by
his secretary, Eufemia...
150
00:11:57,073 --> 00:12:00,305
...and attend midday mass
every Sunday.
151
00:12:00,305 --> 00:12:05,094
Carmelo Pedicò is the right man,
his power is unlimited.
152
00:12:05,232 --> 00:12:08,910
His word is law,
his wishes command...
153
00:12:09,041 --> 00:12:11,758
In the Rocca Pizzo province,
come fair weather orfoul.
154
00:12:11,857 --> 00:12:13,937
So, if it rains tomorrow
we'll know who to blame!
155
00:12:13,937 --> 00:12:17,286
We'll have no problem
finding him on Sunday.
156
00:12:17,393 --> 00:12:21,425
- There are other problems...
- Why, is he stubborn, a crook?
157
00:12:21,425 --> 00:12:23,727
- No, he's honest...
- Then it's done!
158
00:12:53,618 --> 00:12:58,091
Honorable Pedicò!
May I have a word?
159
00:12:58,194 --> 00:13:01,806
Ah, monsignor!
Wait in the car, Mary...
160
00:13:02,386 --> 00:13:03,630
Come with me...
161
00:13:03,731 --> 00:13:06,862
Honorable, I wanted to introduce
twwo dearfriends...
162
00:13:06,994 --> 00:13:10,442
...Commander La Noce and
accountantAIbertini, his secretary.
163
00:13:10,547 --> 00:13:12,816
My secretary, Eufemia.
164
00:13:12,979 --> 00:13:16,841
Commander La Noce is president of
Straccolone, the cheese factory...
165
00:13:17,042 --> 00:13:20,785
...currently, as you know, the victim
of a regrettable circumstance.
166
00:13:21,011 --> 00:13:25,427
Sadly Italy has 116,000
regrettable circumstances every day!
167
00:13:25,427 --> 00:13:29,834
- I beg you, sir, you can do a lot...
- I'm merely a deputy...
168
00:13:29,971 --> 00:13:32,010
Yes, but everyone says
you are a fat...
169
00:13:32,243 --> 00:13:36,945
...I mean, a faithful interpreter of
people's needs, soon to be a minister.
170
00:13:37,075 --> 00:13:41,167
I thank you for the thought.
The elections will be soon...
171
00:13:41,299 --> 00:13:45,936
...and all will be clear! I'm sorry,
my wife is waiting in the car.
172
00:13:46,067 --> 00:13:48,523
- Let me accompany you.
- Thank you...
173
00:13:48,659 --> 00:13:50,895
- Another stitch up!
- Really?
174
00:13:50,995 --> 00:13:53,450
Didn't you hear?
He wants to establish the truth.
175
00:13:53,588 --> 00:13:57,384
Commander, we need to make
a drastic decision.
176
00:13:57,492 --> 00:14:02,380
- Don't say stupid things...
- I didn't say anything stupid.
177
00:14:09,171 --> 00:14:11,692
I knew it would end like that!
178
00:14:13,332 --> 00:14:15,536
That priest made a fool of me!
179
00:14:15,860 --> 00:14:19,275
He took the land, and we
haven't heard from Pedicò since!
180
00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:24,202
- It's been three days already!
- Pedicò must have some flaw...
181
00:14:24,532 --> 00:14:27,630
...if we find his weak point,
we're there!
182
00:14:27,764 --> 00:14:32,884
You spoke without stuttering,
but nonsense as usual!
183
00:14:32,884 --> 00:14:37,554
I know everything about Pedicò's
past and present...
184
00:14:38,132 --> 00:14:41,198
He doesn't steal, doesn't speculate,
has no illegitimate children...
185
00:14:41,364 --> 00:14:44,234
...doesn't blackmail, smuggle,
or take drugs...
186
00:14:44,373 --> 00:14:48,432
...and despite being Sicilian,
he's not even mafia!
187
00:14:48,981 --> 00:14:50,956
What an awful man!
188
00:14:54,453 --> 00:14:57,682
- Who is it?
- A priestfrom Monsignor Alatri.
189
00:14:57,813 --> 00:15:00,661
Send him in!
190
00:15:01,845 --> 00:15:06,122
Our man from heaven has come.
Open, quickly...
191
00:15:06,837 --> 00:15:08,405
Please...
192
00:15:08,405 --> 00:15:10,642
Good day.
Commander La Noce?
193
00:15:10,773 --> 00:15:12,813
Yes, that's me, take a seat...
194
00:15:13,109 --> 00:15:16,241
So, MonsignorAlatri,
any news?
195
00:15:17,014 --> 00:15:19,534
Actually, I'm not sure I can speak...
196
00:15:19,638 --> 00:15:23,500
Speak freely, these are my
collaborators... unfortunately.
197
00:15:23,605 --> 00:15:26,834
I have an explosive document
on your honorable gentleman...
198
00:15:26,997 --> 00:15:30,227
- Pedicò?!
- I can't name him...
199
00:15:30,421 --> 00:15:33,040
I knew that honorable man,
who we can't name...
200
00:15:33,270 --> 00:15:38,092
...had an A-A-Achille's heel!
201
00:15:39,062 --> 00:15:41,549
This is engineer De Vitis,
our honorable helped him obtain...
202
00:15:41,654 --> 00:15:44,469
...the famous Riva dei Ciclopi
construction project.
203
00:15:45,974 --> 00:15:48,462
This is engineer de Vitis' wife...
204
00:15:49,526 --> 00:15:52,428
Oh, my gooooosh!
205
00:15:53,462 --> 00:15:55,731
- I have to change...
- No! Oh, please.
206
00:15:55,958 --> 00:15:59,733
This is professor Tamigiani, our
honorable helped make him head...
207
00:15:59,863 --> 00:16:02,896
...of a Palermo clinic, even though,
as a doctor, Tamigiani...
208
00:16:03,062 --> 00:16:06,445
...is p-p-pitiful!
209
00:16:07,703 --> 00:16:10,453
This is professor Tamigiani's wife...
210
00:16:10,583 --> 00:16:13,398
- Holy fuck!
- Behind me, Satan!
211
00:16:13,622 --> 00:16:14,899
Move ahead, reverend!
212
00:16:15,511 --> 00:16:16,950
This is professor Voccia...
213
00:16:16,950 --> 00:16:19,667
...our honorable helped him obtain
an exclusive patent...
214
00:16:19,767 --> 00:16:22,451
...worth 200 million.
215
00:16:24,887 --> 00:16:28,596
This is Mrs. Voccia,
may God keep her safe!
216
00:16:54,072 --> 00:16:56,406
What a guy, this Honorable Pedicò!
217
00:16:57,304 --> 00:16:59,573
He has a weakness
for other men's wives.
218
00:17:00,568 --> 00:17:05,423
- Commander, we're riding a winner!
- Albertini, dismount and think.
219
00:17:05,559 --> 00:17:08,120
What can I do, send my wife
to sleep with our honorable?
220
00:17:08,120 --> 00:17:12,312
Knowing your wife, you'd do better
to send the monsignor!
221
00:17:12,312 --> 00:17:15,214
Albertini,
you must be exhausted...
222
00:17:15,352 --> 00:17:18,549
...take two days' vacation!
223
00:17:18,648 --> 00:17:23,383
- Commander, I've an idea.
- This time I'll shoot you!
224
00:17:23,481 --> 00:17:27,375
Listen... your wife's all
"church and home", no one knows her...
225
00:17:27,512 --> 00:17:30,644
What's to stop us replacing her
with another woman?
226
00:17:30,744 --> 00:17:35,218
For example, with a beautiful girl
like our Luisella...
227
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:36,946
Engineer, you've gone crazy!
228
00:17:37,048 --> 00:17:39,863
My boyfriend plays basketball
and he's six foot four!
229
00:17:39,961 --> 00:17:43,791
Ask him, if you dare!
Commander, may I go?
230
00:17:44,025 --> 00:17:46,446
Good night!
What's got into you?
231
00:17:46,585 --> 00:17:50,382
It was just a hypothesis... do you know
how many I can find, better than her?
232
00:17:50,457 --> 00:17:53,840
I have a simple, infallible plan!
233
00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:56,942
Friday night Pedicò takes the
sleeper train for Rocca Pizzo...
234
00:17:57,049 --> 00:18:01,838
...we find a beautiful girl who
gets on the same train with you...
235
00:18:01,946 --> 00:18:04,663
...who you introduce as your wife!
Have I been clear?
236
00:18:04,762 --> 00:18:08,656
You didn't stutter this time either,
though it's not a bad idea!
237
00:18:09,049 --> 00:18:13,272
- Can you find the right girl?
- If I don't, I'll cut my...
238
00:18:13,402 --> 00:18:17,199
- I'll hold you to it!
- Not those... I'll cut my hair!
239
00:18:18,073 --> 00:18:21,903
With modern technology,
all it takes is a button!
240
00:18:26,778 --> 00:18:28,665
- Hello, can I help?
- Well, I'd like...
241
00:18:28,794 --> 00:18:31,128
- Car, home or boat?
- A"Girl Friday".
242
00:18:31,258 --> 00:18:33,745
- Be clear.
- A"girl for all boyfriends".
243
00:18:33,850 --> 00:18:36,403
- Explain.
- A loose woman...
244
00:18:36,507 --> 00:18:38,394
- Be clear.
- Aslut, ok?!
245
00:18:38,490 --> 00:18:40,246
Fine, last on the left.
246
00:18:45,947 --> 00:18:48,816
- Good day.
- How can I help you?
247
00:18:48,954 --> 00:18:50,612
The woman on information
sent me...
248
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:54,456
...I'm looking for a special friend.
- Tell me your preferences...
249
00:18:54,554 --> 00:18:57,456
Tall, short, thin, rotund,
blonde, red, brunette?
250
00:18:57,563 --> 00:19:00,662
Actually, it's not for me,
it's for a friend...
251
00:19:00,762 --> 00:19:02,453
Don't you know your friend's tastes?
252
00:19:02,586 --> 00:19:06,481
- She must be Swed...
- Swedish?
253
00:19:06,619 --> 00:19:11,441
No, a sweetie. One who makes you book
heart treatment on sight.
254
00:19:11,707 --> 00:19:13,878
I see, leave it to me...
255
00:19:15,067 --> 00:19:17,717
Blonde, busty, 5 foot 8...
256
00:19:18,235 --> 00:19:21,050
Ah, sorry, she has to be
a good t-t-talker...
257
00:19:21,179 --> 00:19:23,568
We'll put "good, quick tongue".
258
00:19:24,059 --> 00:19:25,401
Perfect!
259
00:19:27,259 --> 00:19:33,239
We're searching Turin to Venice.
That's the best area.
260
00:19:33,340 --> 00:19:37,398
The electronic brain
will reply in 10 seconds...
261
00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:42,193
See how quick it is?
262
00:19:42,428 --> 00:19:49,302
Miss G.R., number 116, will fly
Alitalia from Milan at 15:10 hours...
263
00:19:49,404 --> 00:19:53,081
...arriving Rome 16:10.
264
00:20:12,636 --> 00:20:17,077
- Are you sure you'll recognize her?
- No, we've never met...
265
00:20:17,212 --> 00:20:21,467
So what do we do, stop
every blonde on sight?
266
00:20:21,597 --> 00:20:25,459
We're in the hands of the electronic
brain, its organization is perfect.
267
00:20:25,565 --> 00:20:30,005
The girl will go to the news-stand
and buy a copy of "Corriere di Brescia".
268
00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:32,445
O-o-o...
269
00:20:32,445 --> 00:20:33,721
- O-o...
- Of course, over there...
270
00:20:33,821 --> 00:20:35,763
No, I mean, oh fuck!
271
00:20:47,389 --> 00:20:50,553
- That must be her...
- Relax, we'll know in a moment.
272
00:20:50,654 --> 00:20:54,396
- The "Giornale di Bergamo", please.
- Isn't "Corriere di Brescia" better?
273
00:20:54,621 --> 00:20:57,491
- Why?
- Bergamo and Brescia are neighbors, no?
274
00:20:59,486 --> 00:21:00,827
No.
275
00:21:04,446 --> 00:21:06,868
When you make love,
do you talk to your husband?
276
00:21:07,037 --> 00:21:08,860
Only if he phones...
277
00:21:20,190 --> 00:21:22,230
The "Giornale di Brescia", please...
278
00:21:22,334 --> 00:21:23,709
Thanks.
279
00:21:26,238 --> 00:21:30,461
- Are you from Brescia?
- Yes, I'm Mr. G.R. 116.
280
00:21:30,558 --> 00:21:34,781
- Incredible!
- What?! I'll take our honorable this?
281
00:21:34,911 --> 00:21:37,662
Honorables are fine by me,
I'm not fussy.
282
00:21:37,662 --> 00:21:40,891
Impossible, the electronic brain
never makes mistakes.
283
00:21:41,023 --> 00:21:43,805
You're right, the mistake
is all mine.
284
00:21:43,934 --> 00:21:47,546
I've been a mistake
since my father conceived me.
285
00:21:47,614 --> 00:21:50,963
Laugh away. Your father
hardly got you right!
286
00:21:54,591 --> 00:21:58,868
Right, an electronic brain
with balls of ricotta cheese!
287
00:21:58,974 --> 00:22:02,619
If I'd asked for a liquidizer,
they'd have sent an aircraft carrier!
288
00:22:02,719 --> 00:22:07,356
It's not like I wanted a harpist,
or a Chinese translator...
289
00:22:07,487 --> 00:22:09,276
...damn, all I wanted was a slut!
290
00:22:10,559 --> 00:22:14,007
# I'm a woman, I'm no saint...
291
00:22:14,176 --> 00:22:17,689
# Don't tempt me, I'm no saint...
292
00:22:21,375 --> 00:22:22,717
Hi!
293
00:22:22,816 --> 00:22:26,711
These girls have picked a bad road...
no one passes here!
294
00:22:26,912 --> 00:22:29,334
Hey boy, are you afraid of us?
295
00:22:30,047 --> 00:22:31,356
No...
296
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,549
I can't take him one
who does this for a "living"...
297
00:22:36,896 --> 00:22:39,198
Far from "living",
she'd have us "dead".
298
00:22:41,152 --> 00:22:44,381
If I present her as Mrs. La Noce,
all "church and home"...
299
00:22:44,544 --> 00:22:47,479
...Honorable Pedicò will turn Muslim!
300
00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:49,656
Darling, fancy a tickle?
301
00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:53,015
Go on, there's no tax!
302
00:23:27,073 --> 00:23:30,815
- Are you expecting anyone?
- Yes, clients.
303
00:23:31,905 --> 00:23:34,425
- You look new...
- I am.
304
00:23:34,849 --> 00:23:38,461
Great, just what I was looking for...
Hop in!
305
00:23:38,914 --> 00:23:43,671
- 5,000 lira.
- Is that all?! Come on, hop in!
306
00:23:54,593 --> 00:23:57,692
- What are you ca-ca-called?
- Coco.
307
00:23:57,825 --> 00:24:00,825
- Are you shittin' me?
- No, my name's Coco.
308
00:24:01,442 --> 00:24:03,831
Coco... the name's not important...
309
00:24:03,938 --> 00:24:09,153
Listen, would you like to earn
a b-b-bunch of money?
310
00:24:09,282 --> 00:24:12,860
- Robertuzzo said 5,000.
- Who? Ah, your guy...
311
00:24:13,475 --> 00:24:17,304
If I offer 400,000
for two days' work...
312
00:24:17,378 --> 00:24:20,542
...would Robertuzzo be co-co...
- I'm Coco!
313
00:24:20,643 --> 00:24:24,898
- Co-content, I meant!
- Uh...
314
00:24:25,026 --> 00:24:28,343
You don't talk much?
Good, I like that!
315
00:24:28,482 --> 00:24:33,858
Awoman who ta-ta...
I'll tell you later!
316
00:24:33,858 --> 00:24:37,470
So, will you do two days for me?
317
00:24:37,923 --> 00:24:39,646
- Well, ok...
- Adeal?
318
00:24:39,875 --> 00:24:43,672
- What about Robertuzzo?
- Don't worry, I'll handle him...
319
00:24:43,811 --> 00:24:47,356
We'll write him a note
and leave it at his house...
320
00:24:47,459 --> 00:24:52,445
That'll keep it betwween us twwo...
as the French say, "entraineuse"!
321
00:24:58,723 --> 00:25:00,152
Come in, come...
322
00:25:00,899 --> 00:25:02,557
To the left.
323
00:25:03,203 --> 00:25:04,697
I'll show you...
324
00:25:05,475 --> 00:25:07,133
I used to share with mother...
325
00:25:07,203 --> 00:25:11,426
...then she went home.
Make yourself at home...
326
00:25:12,388 --> 00:25:16,796
God your house is a mess!
We'll fix it up later...
327
00:25:22,916 --> 00:25:27,738
Are you a speed queen, or something?
This is Rome, not the Monza Grand Prix!
328
00:25:28,132 --> 00:25:30,401
Not talking's fine, but do you need
to strip without warning?
329
00:25:30,628 --> 00:25:34,884
You're Commander La Noce's wife now,
you have to dress like a dove...
330
00:25:35,012 --> 00:25:39,006
You only strip when Pedicò starts
to chat you up...
331
00:25:39,940 --> 00:25:43,169
Coco, are you getting this?
332
00:25:47,557 --> 00:25:50,142
We have to hurry,
the train leaves at 7:00...
333
00:25:50,212 --> 00:25:53,824
Wait, I'll go buy you
some lady's clothes.
334
00:25:53,957 --> 00:25:55,680
Let's get your measurements...
335
00:26:00,356 --> 00:26:02,244
98...
336
00:26:03,045 --> 00:26:05,947
98... to think
that from these breasts...
337
00:26:06,085 --> 00:26:08,027
...depends the life
of one hundred men!
338
00:26:08,101 --> 00:26:10,752
- A hundred?
- You don't need to feed them directly!
339
00:26:10,885 --> 00:26:14,365
Once you get under Pedicò,
they'll all go back to work...
340
00:26:15,557 --> 00:26:17,411
110.
341
00:26:18,533 --> 00:26:22,395
Oh my God...
I'm tempted to screw it all!
342
00:26:24,101 --> 00:26:26,851
- Hello?
- You moron, where the fuck are you?
343
00:26:26,981 --> 00:26:30,080
Wait, before getting angry
you should see...
344
00:26:30,181 --> 00:26:32,036
What the hell have you done?!
345
00:26:32,166 --> 00:26:36,955
- We're cha-cha...
- Have you got a girl, or not?
346
00:26:37,606 --> 00:26:41,729
- Yes... she's beautiful.
- Albertini!
347
00:26:41,829 --> 00:26:47,678
Beautiful, real, ca-caressable!
348
00:26:55,430 --> 00:26:57,885
- You're such a sweetie!
- Me?
349
00:26:58,022 --> 00:27:00,739
Yeah, sweet and righteous!
350
00:27:01,318 --> 00:27:06,501
With ajohn like you, I'd be
the happiestwhore in the world!
351
00:27:10,406 --> 00:27:15,840
- You can't talk like that!
- Why not? Robertuzzo never minded!
352
00:27:18,855 --> 00:27:20,830
What the fuck's wrong with you?
353
00:27:22,854 --> 00:27:28,037
- Shit, I never noticed your language!
- You know, I'm very shy...
354
00:27:28,422 --> 00:27:31,008
But with you,
I feel free to say what I like!
355
00:27:31,111 --> 00:27:33,347
Shut up already!
356
00:27:33,447 --> 00:27:39,328
You sure know how to make
a woman like me feel good...
357
00:27:39,559 --> 00:27:42,631
- The total opposite of Robertuzzo!
- Coco, shut up!
358
00:27:42,631 --> 00:27:46,854
When he gets something up his ass,
he beats the shit out of me...
359
00:27:46,983 --> 00:27:51,555
Coco, we're in trouble!
You can't be the commander's wife!
360
00:27:51,815 --> 00:27:54,466
You know what?
I don't fucking care...
361
00:27:54,791 --> 00:27:58,140
- It's you I like...
- Oh my God!
362
00:27:58,375 --> 00:28:00,644
I should make her eat
a dictionary!
363
00:28:00,776 --> 00:28:02,182
Albertini!
364
00:28:02,664 --> 00:28:03,711
Where are you going?!
365
00:28:03,816 --> 00:28:08,573
At last! Splendid,
truly splendid! Enchanting!
366
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:12,357
Commander, she's a d-d...
367
00:28:12,488 --> 00:28:17,160
- I can tell, delightful!
- Commander, are you on this train too?
368
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:21,252
Yes, a sudden business trip,
something important...
369
00:28:21,352 --> 00:28:24,997
...let me introduce my wife.
- An honor, madam...
370
00:28:25,192 --> 00:28:26,654
My compliments to your beauty!
371
00:28:26,888 --> 00:28:30,084
And my secretary, actually,
my right arm...
372
00:28:30,153 --> 00:28:33,288
An incomparable,
irreplaceable man...
373
00:28:33,288 --> 00:28:37,444
...but for him I would have missed
the train and the deal...
374
00:28:37,544 --> 00:28:41,439
- Commander, l-l-I...
- You what?!
375
00:28:41,544 --> 00:28:43,813
- We need to talk!
- What's up now?
376
00:28:44,072 --> 00:28:45,828
I'll tell you!
377
00:28:45,961 --> 00:28:50,151
- Don't shove, are you crazy?!
- I need to be alone with you!
378
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:52,809
I don't want to be
alone with you!
379
00:28:52,809 --> 00:28:56,965
I'll make you want to...
it's important, really!
380
00:28:57,192 --> 00:28:59,331
Ma'am, go back to your grave, please!
381
00:29:05,065 --> 00:29:11,394
No! No! I've been cursed
since I met you!
382
00:29:13,033 --> 00:29:15,521
Hi there, auntie!
383
00:29:15,689 --> 00:29:18,209
Let's hope war breaks out
and you're my nurse!
384
00:29:18,377 --> 00:29:23,754
- God you're beautiful!
- Wanna meet my little brother?
385
00:29:23,754 --> 00:29:27,332
Bring your hat here, sweetie,
you're on the wrong train!
386
00:29:27,561 --> 00:29:29,023
Stop that!
387
00:29:29,514 --> 00:29:32,034
- Get inside, move!
- Get your hands off me!
388
00:29:32,202 --> 00:29:34,112
- You'll pay for this!
- Yeah, sure...
389
00:29:36,618 --> 00:29:40,993
Idiot, at the last moment
you tell me it won't work... why?!
390
00:29:41,226 --> 00:29:43,648
Every second word
she says "fuck" four times!
391
00:29:43,882 --> 00:29:49,217
No I don't! The "fucks" are yours!
All I said was I like you...
392
00:29:49,354 --> 00:29:52,037
But I'll still do the work...
393
00:29:52,138 --> 00:29:56,416
With the commander, the honorable, the
station master, who the fuck ever!
394
00:29:56,522 --> 00:30:00,930
- Does she always speak like that?
- No, worse!
395
00:30:01,707 --> 00:30:04,162
Didn't you realize earlier?
396
00:30:04,266 --> 00:30:06,852
I was looking for a stunner,
not a Nobel winner!
397
00:30:06,955 --> 00:30:09,770
- Throw her off the train!
- What?!
398
00:30:12,138 --> 00:30:13,797
It's too late, now...
399
00:30:14,602 --> 00:30:17,352
- You're fired immediately!
- On the train?
400
00:30:17,451 --> 00:30:19,338
- Yes.
- Fired on a speeding train?
401
00:30:19,402 --> 00:30:21,791
- Yes!
- I see...
402
00:30:21,867 --> 00:30:24,682
I'm a failure,
I've no more reason to live!
403
00:30:24,875 --> 00:30:26,631
Give me a rope!
404
00:30:26,731 --> 00:30:28,040
To hang yourself?
405
00:30:28,171 --> 00:30:30,724
No, to stop that bag
falling on my head!
406
00:30:30,923 --> 00:30:33,159
Fuck you and the bag!
407
00:30:39,531 --> 00:30:42,827
Ah, honorable,
are you on this train too?
408
00:30:42,923 --> 00:30:45,312
Like every Friday...
409
00:30:45,547 --> 00:30:50,818
Lemon juice with a dash
of bicarbonate and sugar, please...
410
00:30:50,956 --> 00:30:53,225
...and a Fernet for the lady.
411
00:30:53,451 --> 00:30:56,386
Honorable,
this is your day for meetings!
412
00:30:56,524 --> 00:31:00,485
First lawyer Rossi, then
Colonel Maccicché, and now La Noce!
413
00:31:00,587 --> 00:31:05,541
- Do you know La Noce, sir?
- La Noce... do we know La Noce?
414
00:31:05,644 --> 00:31:10,183
Yes, sir, the Roman industrialist
with a cheese factory in Rocca Pizzo.
415
00:31:10,316 --> 00:31:14,408
Monsignor Alatri mentioned him,
so we met him...
416
00:31:14,828 --> 00:31:15,908
Did we speak?
417
00:31:16,012 --> 00:31:20,103
Yes, one Sunday after mass,
a very interesting person.
418
00:31:20,332 --> 00:31:26,922
Now I recall. An industrialist
with a rather regrettable situation...
419
00:31:27,052 --> 00:31:28,579
But you should see his wife!
420
00:31:29,804 --> 00:31:31,714
- Beautiful?
- Amazing!
421
00:31:31,852 --> 00:31:34,307
- Haven't you met?
- I haven't had the honor...
422
00:31:34,413 --> 00:31:38,603
- She's a marvel!
- Her husband must be very jealous!
423
00:31:38,732 --> 00:31:41,034
In fact, he keeps her hidden!
424
00:31:41,165 --> 00:31:45,802
He must come to diner, he must
bring her to the dining car.
425
00:31:50,477 --> 00:31:55,333
I'll get you sandwiches,
but don't move from here.
426
00:31:55,437 --> 00:31:59,561
- Good luck...
- You too, honorable...
427
00:31:59,661 --> 00:32:01,898
- Goodbye...
- Your Fernet Branca.
428
00:32:02,157 --> 00:32:04,012
- Hi.
- Hi...
429
00:32:07,405 --> 00:32:10,821
- Commander La Noce...
- Commander La Noce!
430
00:32:10,958 --> 00:32:14,733
- My dear sir!
- We were just talking of you...
431
00:32:14,830 --> 00:32:16,488
I hope it was something good!
432
00:32:16,685 --> 00:32:20,580
Don't be modest, how
could one talk otherwise of you?
433
00:32:20,717 --> 00:32:24,460
- You're an exquisite woman
- Why haven't we heard from you?
434
00:32:24,590 --> 00:32:27,885
- I didn't want to bother your...
- You're no bother.
435
00:32:28,014 --> 00:32:33,033
In fact, to show my friendship,
I invite you and your wife to dinner.
436
00:32:33,582 --> 00:32:37,259
My... my wife?
Really?
437
00:32:37,358 --> 00:32:40,041
We know she's traveling
on this train...
438
00:32:40,142 --> 00:32:42,379
...and you keep her "hidden".
439
00:32:42,606 --> 00:32:44,995
I hope you won't insult me
by refusing!
440
00:32:45,102 --> 00:32:47,950
Not at all, happily...
441
00:33:24,783 --> 00:33:28,973
We did well to take
the second sitting...
442
00:33:29,072 --> 00:33:31,184
...that way we've no hurry!
- Yes, no hurry...
443
00:33:31,184 --> 00:33:34,795
It's so nice here, and this
fruit salad is delicious...
444
00:33:34,959 --> 00:33:37,228
Yes, truly excellent...
445
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:44,520
I see the lady
doesn't like her fruit salad.
446
00:33:44,624 --> 00:33:47,119
Not at all, she loves it,
she's crazy about it!
447
00:33:47,119 --> 00:33:52,237
- Sir, do you go to Sicily often?
- Yes, whenever possible!
448
00:33:52,752 --> 00:33:54,574
Does madam know Sicily?
449
00:33:54,800 --> 00:33:59,437
No, she doesn't, but you're so right
to take a little rest...
450
00:33:59,536 --> 00:34:01,227
I do whenever I can!
451
00:34:01,328 --> 00:34:06,991
This week I've a lot to do,
I have to reorganize my library...
452
00:34:07,217 --> 00:34:11,600
Eufemia, by the way...
I suggest you retire to bed...
453
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:14,699
...you have a busy day tomorrow.
- Actually, I...
454
00:34:14,832 --> 00:34:17,767
Go, go!
Our guests will excuse you...
455
00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:21,641
- Goodnight, everyone!
- Sweet dreams, madam.
456
00:34:21,873 --> 00:34:23,913
Sent from heaven...
457
00:34:24,433 --> 00:34:26,986
Thanks, you too...
458
00:34:29,456 --> 00:34:30,765
Bye...
459
00:34:30,961 --> 00:34:32,139
I'm so sorry...
460
00:34:32,273 --> 00:34:35,786
It was my fault,
I got in the way...
461
00:34:36,305 --> 00:34:39,338
Sit, sit!
462
00:34:39,569 --> 00:34:41,357
No, don't worry...
463
00:34:41,521 --> 00:34:45,351
No, madam, I can't allow this,
you're kind...
464
00:34:45,489 --> 00:34:48,784
...I'm deeply mortified...
465
00:34:48,945 --> 00:34:52,207
...I can't allow...
466
00:34:52,338 --> 00:34:54,028
...well, whatever...
467
00:34:59,314 --> 00:35:01,321
I'm Honorable Pedicò's secretary.
468
00:35:01,457 --> 00:35:03,345
- A pleasure...
- Not for me.
469
00:35:03,569 --> 00:35:08,206
The honorable has been given cabin 7,
and me number 3. It's too far away.
470
00:35:08,338 --> 00:35:10,705
- Who's in number 6?
- Let's see...
471
00:35:10,930 --> 00:35:13,746
It's Mr. Straccolone,
who's also taken number 5...
472
00:35:13,746 --> 00:35:18,350
It's not a man, it's a company,
and they've booked 3 people.
473
00:35:18,450 --> 00:35:20,392
So, is there a cabin free
near me?
474
00:35:20,562 --> 00:35:23,311
Yes, number 1, over the wheels,
which no one wants.
475
00:35:23,410 --> 00:35:25,996
- Good, put the honorable in there.
- Over the wheels?
476
00:35:26,226 --> 00:35:30,252
Yes!
Given we can't put him under them!
477
00:35:46,803 --> 00:35:49,224
- Guard?
- Yes, madam?
478
00:35:49,363 --> 00:35:53,967
We haf seen zeese people
behafing very scandal...
479
00:35:54,067 --> 00:35:57,231
- We vant to change cabin.
- Fuck me, what a night!
480
00:35:57,330 --> 00:36:00,647
- I mean, I can't kick them out!
- Gut, zis is very gut!
481
00:36:00,755 --> 00:36:04,301
I'll put you in cabin 7,
it's a very quiet cabin.
482
00:36:04,403 --> 00:36:08,559
- Zis is peace and quiet?
- Totally quiet, eternally peaceful!
483
00:36:11,539 --> 00:36:14,539
Cheers... am I wrong,
or does madam never speak?
484
00:36:14,611 --> 00:36:17,294
True, she never speaks but...
485
00:36:19,348 --> 00:36:21,715
- The lady fu-fu...
- "Fu" what?
486
00:36:22,035 --> 00:36:24,752
She's founded two
important charitable ventures...
487
00:36:24,883 --> 00:36:28,266
...and to make sure they succeed,
she's made a vow to Saint Rocco.
488
00:36:28,499 --> 00:36:35,275
Ah, right, I forgot...
a 24-hour vow of silence!
489
00:36:35,412 --> 00:36:40,049
That's very noble...
I'm only sorry not to hear her voice.
490
00:36:40,179 --> 00:36:43,311
The vow ends tomorrow
at noon...
491
00:36:43,956 --> 00:36:46,956
However, isn't it time
we went to bed?
492
00:36:47,476 --> 00:36:51,306
- Yes, my wife is very tired.
- Would you like a coffee?
493
00:36:51,412 --> 00:36:54,925
Please, if she takes coffee,
she won't sleep till Christmas!
494
00:36:55,028 --> 00:36:58,410
Madam,
I'm truly enchanted...
495
00:36:58,644 --> 00:37:01,743
Thank you, I'm moved
by your kindness...
496
00:37:02,164 --> 00:37:04,750
She can't speak,
so I translate her thoughts!
497
00:37:04,821 --> 00:37:09,043
- Goodnight...
- Thank you so much. Come, dear...
498
00:37:10,036 --> 00:37:13,036
- Holy Mother of God, what a woman!
- Yes, extraordinary...
499
00:37:13,141 --> 00:37:15,890
You know her well,
tell me about her.
500
00:37:16,085 --> 00:37:20,395
- What kind of woman is she?
- Mrs. La Noce is a saint...
501
00:37:20,500 --> 00:37:23,217
- A saint?
- With all the sacrifices of a saint...
502
00:37:23,445 --> 00:37:25,714
...but at the same time a devil!
503
00:37:25,845 --> 00:37:28,780
- In what way?
- One way, straight to hell!
504
00:37:28,917 --> 00:37:31,951
- She's ca-ca...
- Candid?
505
00:37:32,181 --> 00:37:35,181
- No, ca-ca...
- Acat?
506
00:37:35,285 --> 00:37:37,871
- Carnal!
- Aslave to her senses?
507
00:37:38,485 --> 00:37:41,649
In other words, is she "beddable"?
508
00:37:41,781 --> 00:37:46,004
Bed, folding bed, blanket...
she's a nympho!
509
00:37:46,102 --> 00:37:50,412
A nymphomaniac?
So what's with Saint Rocco?
510
00:37:50,613 --> 00:37:54,070
She gets sexual attacks,
for hours, weeks, months...
511
00:37:54,070 --> 00:37:56,688
...she turns you to rubber,
then returns to her senses...
512
00:37:56,790 --> 00:38:00,718
...has an attack of religious remorse,
and becomes a saint!
513
00:38:01,718 --> 00:38:04,468
It's an amazingly
sensual scenario!
514
00:38:05,174 --> 00:38:06,934
Holy Mother of God!
515
00:38:06,934 --> 00:38:11,952
You're an excellent organizer...
let's arrange something in secret.
516
00:38:12,086 --> 00:38:14,835
- Waiter, champagne!
- A great idea...
517
00:38:22,006 --> 00:38:23,862
- We're there...
- Where, Sicily?
518
00:38:23,862 --> 00:38:27,310
No, with the honorable Pedicò...
I've fixed everything.
519
00:38:27,446 --> 00:38:31,440
He's next door... first we get him
randy as a rooster...
520
00:38:31,510 --> 00:38:34,031
...then I go and announce
I've convinced your wife.
521
00:38:34,199 --> 00:38:38,639
- A "church and home" woman? How?
- By night she turns "home and horny"!
522
00:38:39,639 --> 00:38:42,224
My mind's a miracle!
523
00:38:43,895 --> 00:38:45,302
- Guard?
- Uh?
524
00:38:45,430 --> 00:38:48,464
- Guard, where's my cabin?
- I don't know, sir...
525
00:38:48,662 --> 00:38:51,412
- You don't know?
- Ah, you're the honorable sir!
526
00:38:52,631 --> 00:38:56,788
- Not very, right now...
- One too many never dishonored no one.
527
00:38:56,887 --> 00:38:59,156
- But three bottles did!
- You're in number 1, sir.
528
00:38:59,383 --> 00:39:01,522
- Please, this way.
- Here?
529
00:39:03,223 --> 00:39:06,867
- You'll have a great night here.
- I hope so!
530
00:39:08,920 --> 00:39:11,637
Louder, he can't hear you!
531
00:39:12,791 --> 00:39:16,053
Yes, I like it!
Give it to me...
532
00:39:16,856 --> 00:39:20,653
...kiss me, kiss my mouth!
Kiss my prick!
533
00:39:20,984 --> 00:39:23,286
Yes, yes, like that!
534
00:39:27,575 --> 00:39:31,372
Yes... who cares about
the honorable...
535
00:39:31,576 --> 00:39:34,445
Great, that's great!
536
00:39:36,728 --> 00:39:39,062
You're fabulous!
537
00:39:42,777 --> 00:39:48,248
Stop that... we're here to work!
Stop, you filthy pig!
538
00:39:48,248 --> 00:39:50,703
Commander, I got carried away
by passion!
539
00:39:50,809 --> 00:39:52,914
You brute!
540
00:39:54,841 --> 00:39:56,629
Guard!
541
00:39:56,857 --> 00:39:58,580
What is it, ladies?
542
00:39:58,681 --> 00:40:02,423
To sleep impossible when ze man
he say "my prick"!
543
00:40:02,521 --> 00:40:05,106
Zer is another
who say "filthy pig"!
544
00:40:05,209 --> 00:40:08,722
My apologies, these things happen
in the best sleeping cars!
545
00:40:08,856 --> 00:40:10,766
I'll put you in cabin 9.
546
00:40:11,769 --> 00:40:14,038
After this, I'm down
to the engine itself.
547
00:40:14,265 --> 00:40:17,014
No worries,
the man in 8 is deaf!
548
00:40:28,858 --> 00:40:32,087
Battipaglia station!
549
00:40:32,313 --> 00:40:35,412
Is anyone there?
Guard!
550
00:40:38,105 --> 00:40:42,709
- Good evening...
- Hi, I'm looking for a bed...
551
00:40:42,809 --> 00:40:45,744
...don't disappoint me.
- No, no, of course not...
552
00:40:46,234 --> 00:40:47,281
Here, sweetie.
553
00:40:47,513 --> 00:40:51,125
Come, it's a quiet night,
we've still some beds.
554
00:40:51,226 --> 00:40:54,936
Thank you, what luck to find
such a kind young man!
555
00:40:55,033 --> 00:40:57,172
Here, number 7 is free...
556
00:40:57,530 --> 00:40:59,188
Shouldn't I do something first?
557
00:40:59,418 --> 00:41:02,037
I don't know, sir, the toilets
are at either end of the carriage...
558
00:41:02,266 --> 00:41:05,233
No, silly, I meant a ticket...
559
00:41:05,466 --> 00:41:09,361
- You do that with the ticket collector.
- The ticket collector...
560
00:41:10,235 --> 00:41:12,624
- 'Night...
- Uh, good night...
561
00:41:14,075 --> 00:41:15,252
Even on the trains!
562
00:41:15,387 --> 00:41:19,478
- Can I help, sir?
- No, thanks, I'm going to the toilet...
563
00:41:21,243 --> 00:41:25,978
Ok, I leave first, warn Pedicò,
and then go to my cabin...
564
00:41:26,043 --> 00:41:31,193
You wait 10 minutes, then go
to cabin 7, Pedicò's...
565
00:41:31,643 --> 00:41:33,585
Hey, remember not to open
your mouth...
566
00:41:33,819 --> 00:41:36,437
- Shall we synchronize watches?
- Fuck off!
567
00:41:36,570 --> 00:41:38,458
It was for the sake of organization...
568
00:41:42,331 --> 00:41:44,153
Honorable, still awake?
569
00:41:45,211 --> 00:41:48,823
That champagne
went to my head...
570
00:41:49,051 --> 00:41:51,986
- Do you feel sick?
- I'm fine now... and the lady?
571
00:41:52,124 --> 00:41:55,157
I convinced her,
she'll be in your arms shortly.
572
00:41:55,260 --> 00:42:00,017
- I can't wait. Where?
- In cabin number 7...
573
00:42:00,379 --> 00:42:05,333
I'll go freshen up
to be ready for her...
574
00:42:10,427 --> 00:42:11,802
Who is it?
575
00:42:12,220 --> 00:42:14,969
What are you doing?
You should be in cabin 7!
576
00:42:15,100 --> 00:42:19,028
- But I like number 5...
- Don't be silly, go to Pedicò!
577
00:42:19,163 --> 00:42:23,768
Who cares about Pedicò? I like you.
If I had a man like you...
578
00:42:23,868 --> 00:42:26,421
I know, but leave!
Go to the honorable!
579
00:42:26,524 --> 00:42:31,064
Not so fast, sweetie!
When I make love...
580
00:42:31,164 --> 00:42:35,026
...I go all the way!
Otherwise I get hiccups!
581
00:42:36,541 --> 00:42:39,770
God, what melons!
And what amazing thighs!
582
00:42:39,869 --> 00:42:44,124
I shouldn't boast, but back home
they call me "Giovannona Long-thigh".
583
00:42:44,221 --> 00:42:49,371
Robertuzzo made me change the name...
he says Coco is more refined.
584
00:42:49,917 --> 00:42:54,259
- Darling...
- What are you doing... that's my nose!
585
00:43:01,629 --> 00:43:05,622
Damn!
They even put handles!
586
00:43:09,693 --> 00:43:11,100
Number 3?
587
00:43:13,085 --> 00:43:16,151
What cheek, imagine
if the honorable knew!
588
00:43:16,285 --> 00:43:19,319
- What?
- I knew you'd come!
589
00:43:19,421 --> 00:43:23,033
That's why
I left the door open!
590
00:43:23,326 --> 00:43:28,411
No, no, madam!
For the love of God, stop!
591
00:43:43,102 --> 00:43:48,120
Madam, I'm moved deeply
to be on my knees beside you...
592
00:43:48,190 --> 00:43:51,838
...to express
my immense admiration.
593
00:43:51,838 --> 00:43:55,482
I know you can't talk,
but that doesn't matter...
594
00:43:55,582 --> 00:43:59,324
I now entrust to my hands...
595
00:43:59,422 --> 00:44:04,278
...the task of warming you,
stimulating you...
596
00:44:04,382 --> 00:44:08,605
...until our embrace becomes
a raging flood...
597
00:44:08,703 --> 00:44:13,918
...as unstoppable and incandescent
as an eruption on Etna!
598
00:44:13,918 --> 00:44:18,490
Over these shoulders, this hip...
599
00:44:18,623 --> 00:44:21,306
...this promontory...
600
00:44:21,823 --> 00:44:23,514
...my hands...
601
00:44:28,223 --> 00:44:30,011
Mamma!
602
00:44:31,423 --> 00:44:32,895
Help! Help!
603
00:44:32,895 --> 00:44:36,124
He's a crab!
He's grabbed me like a crab!
604
00:44:38,111 --> 00:44:40,347
Get off, let me go!
605
00:44:41,696 --> 00:44:44,030
I feel sick, oh God, I feel sick!
606
00:44:47,935 --> 00:44:50,324
Help, guard, help!
607
00:44:50,495 --> 00:44:52,022
Help!
608
00:44:52,159 --> 00:44:53,948
- Listen, give me a hand...
- What happened?
609
00:44:54,016 --> 00:44:56,918
- He's not a crab, he's a fag!
- Afag?!
610
00:44:58,208 --> 00:45:01,721
Rocca Pizzo station!
611
00:45:02,080 --> 00:45:05,877
The Rome train for Catania-Siracusa...
612
00:45:06,016 --> 00:45:09,277
...is arriving on platform 3.
613
00:45:13,312 --> 00:45:18,877
That's it! No discussion!
You take the first plane to Rome!
614
00:45:18,976 --> 00:45:23,995
Sorry, but if I'm fired, I can
stay where I want at my expense.
615
00:45:24,704 --> 00:45:28,861
A smartass, huh? Then I re-hire you,
and order you back to Rome!
616
00:45:29,664 --> 00:45:31,290
- Can I take her with me?
- Yes, yes...
617
00:45:31,392 --> 00:45:36,149
I wish! But Pedicò now knows her
as my wife, so she has to stay.
618
00:45:36,224 --> 00:45:39,836
- Commander, let me f-f-f...
- Fuck you, period!
619
00:45:39,968 --> 00:45:43,831
Let me fix things... I got her into
this mess, but I'll get her out...
620
00:45:43,937 --> 00:45:45,879
Commander, where are you going?
That's the shithouse!
621
00:45:46,561 --> 00:45:49,601
Enough foul language!
Vanish!
622
00:45:49,601 --> 00:45:53,562
- Farewell, Coco...
- What? We'll meet again!
623
00:45:54,945 --> 00:45:57,433
- Can I give him a kiss?
- Are you crazy?
624
00:45:57,921 --> 00:46:01,150
- Commander!
- Pedicò's coming, vanish!
625
00:46:01,313 --> 00:46:02,808
The first flight, ok?
Come...
626
00:46:02,977 --> 00:46:04,090
- Bye...
- Farewell, Coco!
627
00:46:04,225 --> 00:46:07,520
- Honorable...
- I'm going by Rocca Pizzo...
628
00:46:07,649 --> 00:46:09,624
...if you'd like a ride...
629
00:46:09,729 --> 00:46:11,584
Isn't your secretary coming?
630
00:46:11,682 --> 00:46:16,471
No, he has to go to Rome
on urgent business.
631
00:46:37,570 --> 00:46:40,287
It was a lapse...
632
00:46:40,514 --> 00:46:43,067
Coming out of the toilet,
distracted by certain thoughts...
633
00:46:43,170 --> 00:46:46,999
...I went further down the corridor
and opened the wrong door.
634
00:46:47,138 --> 00:46:49,440
Aterrifying scene!
635
00:46:50,114 --> 00:46:52,318
Why not join us for breakfast?
636
00:46:52,514 --> 00:46:55,266
It would be a pleasure.
Wouldn't it, Eufemia?
637
00:46:55,266 --> 00:46:56,770
Mary would be happy too...
638
00:46:56,770 --> 00:47:01,527
Thanks, but I have
business to attend...
639
00:47:01,666 --> 00:47:04,383
But we always eat late, at 2:00.
640
00:47:33,732 --> 00:47:36,252
- Did the silencer fall off your shoes?
- What do you care?!
641
00:47:36,708 --> 00:47:39,937
- Do you know where Albertini lives?
- There...
642
00:47:40,067 --> 00:47:41,791
...on the second floor.
643
00:47:42,788 --> 00:47:44,544
There he is now!
644
00:47:46,756 --> 00:47:48,446
Thanks... I'll give you a tip...
645
00:47:48,580 --> 00:47:50,751
Keep the change...
646
00:47:57,700 --> 00:47:59,456
Damn that traffic warden!
647
00:47:59,556 --> 00:48:00,985
Who is he?!
648
00:48:01,476 --> 00:48:04,640
Officer Thisson... Thisson...
Thisson...
649
00:48:05,028 --> 00:48:09,567
This-son-of-a-bitch must have
woken up on the wrong foot!
650
00:48:14,116 --> 00:48:17,378
Welcome back! I've been waiting
two days for you...
651
00:48:17,508 --> 00:48:18,915
For me?
652
00:48:19,396 --> 00:48:23,488
"Coco will be back in two days.
Don't worry, Mario Albertini."
653
00:48:23,620 --> 00:48:25,409
It's even got Coco's mark...
654
00:48:25,540 --> 00:48:29,796
You're Mr. Robertuzzo.
I wrote so you wouldn't worry.
655
00:48:29,892 --> 00:48:33,209
Coco gave me your
ad-ad-ad... address...
656
00:48:33,316 --> 00:48:37,113
- Where's Coco?
- You mean, "Kid Coconut"...
657
00:48:39,653 --> 00:48:43,581
- Let's go, people get mugged here...
- That's nothing, where's Coco?
658
00:48:43,685 --> 00:48:47,034
- The la-la...
- Don't sing, I get nervous!
659
00:48:47,141 --> 00:48:50,687
The lady is working on something
useful for her career...
660
00:48:50,789 --> 00:48:54,564
- Right now she's in Sicily.
- Ah, Sicily...
661
00:48:55,334 --> 00:48:57,057
People get mugged here
all the time...
662
00:48:57,189 --> 00:48:58,978
Damn you, what's she doing in Sicily?
663
00:48:59,109 --> 00:49:01,565
I can't say, otherwise
our talk will degenerate...
664
00:49:01,798 --> 00:49:04,285
Until now
it's been so relaxed!
665
00:49:05,061 --> 00:49:08,706
Coco is with my boss, Commander
La Noce, pretending to be his wife...
666
00:49:08,805 --> 00:49:13,116
- Why all the play acting?
- So honorable Pedicò can screw her...
667
00:49:14,245 --> 00:49:16,766
There's an honorable involved?
So it's a big deal!
668
00:49:16,998 --> 00:49:18,372
I guess so...
669
00:49:18,470 --> 00:49:20,772
You miserable little shit!
670
00:49:20,870 --> 00:49:24,383
You try doing business without
my permission... I'll kill you!
671
00:49:24,486 --> 00:49:28,414
What lovely fingers you have!
Don't waste them on a murder!
672
00:49:29,094 --> 00:49:32,193
Ok, enough for today...
673
00:49:32,327 --> 00:49:34,880
If I understood right,
you said...
674
00:49:35,014 --> 00:49:37,731
...Commander La Noce
and honorable Pedicò...
675
00:49:37,862 --> 00:49:39,772
Yes, but... now what?
676
00:49:39,911 --> 00:49:41,536
I don't know...
an idea will come.
677
00:49:41,638 --> 00:49:44,158
You see my head?
It's a factory of ideas!
678
00:49:44,262 --> 00:49:46,531
And you see this?
It's an assembly line!
679
00:49:46,631 --> 00:49:48,998
Geniuses should give each other a hand!
680
00:49:49,095 --> 00:49:52,806
- You're right!
- Stop, you don't know who I am!
681
00:49:52,806 --> 00:49:56,068
- An asshole.
- How did you guess?!
682
00:50:04,423 --> 00:50:06,594
Where's he going?
683
00:50:06,823 --> 00:50:11,078
I took the liberty because I was sure
you'd understand, Mrs. La Noce.
684
00:50:11,207 --> 00:50:15,397
I thank you for the information,
Mr. Robertuzzo...
685
00:50:15,495 --> 00:50:20,002
...but I've stopped being interested
in my husband for some time.
686
00:50:20,295 --> 00:50:23,590
Maybe I wasn't clear,
Mrs. La Noce...
687
00:50:23,719 --> 00:50:26,207
- My girl does it for a "living".
- A "living"?
688
00:50:26,311 --> 00:50:30,054
She goes with men... I mean...
689
00:50:30,151 --> 00:50:31,744
...she's a slut!
690
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:39,143
Still, I feel for her. Dealing with
my husband is not pleasant...
691
00:50:39,239 --> 00:50:43,298
Madam, let's stick to the facts.
Your husband has taken Coco to Sicily...
692
00:50:43,400 --> 00:50:45,058
...and introduced her
to honorable Pedicò.
693
00:50:45,192 --> 00:50:47,680
An honorable?
Why?
694
00:50:47,784 --> 00:50:50,533
He's pretending she's his wife
so Pedicò can fuck her!
695
00:50:50,632 --> 00:50:52,771
- What?
- You understood perfectly...
696
00:50:52,873 --> 00:50:55,142
- What a low-life!
- You've got it...
697
00:50:55,240 --> 00:50:58,055
Lord my cup is bitter!
698
00:50:59,560 --> 00:51:01,699
Madam, did you add sugar?
699
00:51:01,832 --> 00:51:05,160
He must be stopped,
I'll leave immediately!
700
00:51:05,160 --> 00:51:08,585
- Mine's sweet...
- I'll make him pay this time!
701
00:51:08,585 --> 00:51:13,374
I won't take planes. Is there
an express to Sicily?
702
00:51:13,481 --> 00:51:17,158
No need... I wouldn't worry
if I were you...
703
00:51:17,257 --> 00:51:19,678
My car is a chariot on fire!
704
00:51:19,816 --> 00:51:24,868
Ok, you take me. Come back
in an hour, I'll be ready to leave!
705
00:51:25,193 --> 00:51:30,081
I'll show everyone
the real Mrs. La Noce!
706
00:51:39,273 --> 00:51:42,794
- Who's that? Mrs. La Noce!
- Hi, Robertuzzo...
707
00:51:42,794 --> 00:51:45,445
Hi, what a beautiful woman!
708
00:51:45,545 --> 00:51:48,480
I never imagined you hid
such beauty...
709
00:51:48,617 --> 00:51:50,984
- You flatter me...
- I swear!
710
00:51:51,114 --> 00:51:53,056
Strike me dead
if I tell a lie... please...
711
00:51:53,225 --> 00:51:55,364
- Thanks...
- Here's my fireball... hop in!
712
00:51:56,618 --> 00:51:58,789
- Hi, sorry I'm late.
- I just got here myself.
713
00:51:59,017 --> 00:52:03,043
Hey, do you have to park there?
Be nice!
714
00:52:04,874 --> 00:52:07,111
Actually, she's fucking nice!
715
00:52:24,586 --> 00:52:28,961
You don't say "I fucking love it",
you say "I'm enchanted"!
716
00:52:29,067 --> 00:52:30,889
Can you get that, or not?
Repeat...
717
00:52:30,987 --> 00:52:33,408
- "I'm enchanted".
- Great!
718
00:52:33,546 --> 00:52:35,652
- How's it going?
- Oh, hi, monsignor.
719
00:52:35,754 --> 00:52:38,307
- Any progress?
- So-so...
720
00:52:38,411 --> 00:52:40,353
She's tries, but she's
too "bullheaded".
721
00:52:40,458 --> 00:52:42,979
- You don't say "bullhead"!
- What do you say?
722
00:52:43,082 --> 00:52:44,907
- "Butthead"!
- We'll never make it.
723
00:52:44,907 --> 00:52:48,779
I fear you've got the wrong approach,
you confuse her with slang...
724
00:52:48,779 --> 00:52:53,733
Let's see, so... you don't say
"bullhead", nor "butthead".
725
00:52:53,867 --> 00:52:57,380
- You say "stubborn".
- Right, I've heard that...
726
00:52:58,059 --> 00:52:59,433
"Stubborn".
727
00:52:59,531 --> 00:53:04,038
Suppose you're introduced
to someone, what do you say?
728
00:53:05,100 --> 00:53:08,231
- "A pleasure to meet you".
- Perfect!
729
00:53:08,523 --> 00:53:11,371
And if they invite you
to stay for lunch?
730
00:53:11,499 --> 00:53:16,289
- "I hope I'm no bother".
- Hear that?! She's not bad.
731
00:53:16,395 --> 00:53:20,738
Thanks, I go hoarse for an hour
and you play the fresh-faced pedagogue!
732
00:53:20,844 --> 00:53:23,877
- Peda-what?
- Forget it!
733
00:53:24,396 --> 00:53:26,185
Go on, tell the monsignor...
734
00:53:26,316 --> 00:53:30,789
...what you say if Pedicò makes
that proposal, that one!
735
00:53:30,956 --> 00:53:32,811
Oh, yes...
736
00:53:32,908 --> 00:53:35,013
"Honorable, go kill yourself dead!"
737
00:53:35,148 --> 00:53:38,214
No, Holy Mary!
With grace and delicacy!
738
00:53:38,316 --> 00:53:40,552
Have you forgotten answer number 6?
739
00:53:42,476 --> 00:53:43,883
"You're a very fascinating man...
740
00:53:43,980 --> 00:53:46,598
...but I come from an old family
and don't have that desire".
741
00:53:46,700 --> 00:53:49,484
You get the idea?
I numbered the answers...
742
00:53:49,484 --> 00:53:53,510
Now for number 7,
to give him hope if he insists...
743
00:53:53,612 --> 00:53:55,652
"Don't insist, sir,
I too am human...
744
00:53:55,788 --> 00:53:57,217
...and might forget myself
for a moment".
745
00:53:57,324 --> 00:54:02,595
That's a little risky... but I realize
it could be useful.
746
00:54:02,733 --> 00:54:07,490
Damn, we have to go soon.
Let's run over number 1.
747
00:54:07,597 --> 00:54:12,169
"Good day, please forgive us
if we're disturbing your peace".
748
00:54:12,301 --> 00:54:14,985
"Heavens, it's a real pleasure."
749
00:54:18,893 --> 00:54:22,690
- We don't want to be any trouble...
- Heavens, Mrs. La Noce...
750
00:54:22,797 --> 00:54:26,507
...it's our pleasure.
- Commander La Noce.
751
00:54:26,605 --> 00:54:30,150
Enchanted, you are a fount
of grace and beauty...
752
00:54:30,253 --> 00:54:35,371
Thank you... would our guests prefer
to be inside or in the garden...
753
00:54:35,469 --> 00:54:37,990
As you wish,
we don't give a fuck...
754
00:54:38,093 --> 00:54:39,916
Number 3... 3!
755
00:54:40,013 --> 00:54:41,955
It's one o'clock, not 3.
756
00:54:42,062 --> 00:54:45,324
I'm happy either way, whatever
you choose is fine...
757
00:54:45,390 --> 00:54:49,863
Carmelo... shall we enjoy the sun
in the garden then?
758
00:54:49,966 --> 00:54:55,203
Sure, let's keep enjoying the day!
759
00:54:55,309 --> 00:54:59,947
With light like this
we can even see Etna!
760
00:55:00,078 --> 00:55:01,452
What a beautiful day...
761
00:55:01,614 --> 00:55:02,989
Come and look...
762
00:55:48,463 --> 00:55:51,310
Let's go eat, or we'll be late
for the Sicily ferry.
763
00:55:51,440 --> 00:55:53,130
Ok, Robertuzzo!
764
00:56:04,335 --> 00:56:06,245
Where are you going?
Come here!
765
00:56:06,640 --> 00:56:09,160
Do you like that?
Mummy will buy you it...
766
00:56:10,064 --> 00:56:12,207
No, no... I've already bought you that!
767
00:56:12,815 --> 00:56:15,150
No, stop,
candy's bad for you...
768
00:56:22,256 --> 00:56:24,264
It's spicy!
769
00:56:25,264 --> 00:56:25,968
- He's cute! Can he talk?
- If not, I'll take him back!
770
00:56:25,968 --> 00:56:29,350
- He's cute! Can he talk?
- If not, I'll take him back!
771
00:56:31,056 --> 00:56:34,252
Hey, he's perfect!
He can really piss!
772
00:56:34,512 --> 00:56:36,846
Are you stealing my child?!
773
00:56:36,944 --> 00:56:38,952
- What a maniac!
- He seemed fake.
774
00:56:46,001 --> 00:56:47,342
Are you hurt?
775
00:56:47,473 --> 00:56:51,564
Not at all!
If I don't fall, it's no fun!
776
00:56:58,993 --> 00:57:00,335
Hello.
777
00:57:02,673 --> 00:57:04,397
Here, your tip...
778
00:57:05,616 --> 00:57:07,111
Thanks.
779
00:57:13,394 --> 00:57:17,223
One day they'll put me
on the 100 lira coin!
780
00:57:17,330 --> 00:57:20,753
With a nose like yours, they'll
have to add a handle. Get out!
781
00:57:20,753 --> 00:57:22,030
With a nose like yours, they'll
have to add a handle. Get out!
782
00:57:22,130 --> 00:57:25,807
This is my turf, give me the coin and
split. Intruders get their ass kicked!
783
00:57:25,970 --> 00:57:27,082
Keep the change...
784
00:57:27,313 --> 00:57:30,543
- You're very beautiful...
- Thank you.
785
00:57:30,897 --> 00:57:34,481
Awoman like you
could go far, on the road...
786
00:57:34,481 --> 00:57:34,950
Awoman like you
could go far, on the road...
787
00:57:35,089 --> 00:57:37,456
I don't think so, I'm lazy...
788
00:57:37,586 --> 00:57:40,881
Maybe you misunderstand.
Until now you've been a slave.
789
00:57:41,010 --> 00:57:43,595
You should get a life!
Make a living of it!
790
00:57:43,730 --> 00:57:47,559
- Sorry, what do you mean?
- Live by it!
791
00:57:47,666 --> 00:57:48,402
If you let me guide you, I'll show
you an unimaginable world...
792
00:57:48,402 --> 00:57:51,850
If you let me guide you, I'll show
you an unimaginable world...
793
00:57:59,890 --> 00:58:02,003
You're much faster
than Robertuzzo's car!
794
00:58:02,003 --> 00:58:04,141
You're much faster
than Robertuzzo's car!
795
00:58:11,730 --> 00:58:15,527
He left us standing!
You're just waste of fuel!
796
00:58:18,195 --> 00:58:20,464
The water's really hot!
797
00:58:20,595 --> 00:58:25,167
It's the first time
I've seen a pool in a condom!
798
00:58:28,947 --> 00:58:29,715
Wonderful...
799
00:58:29,715 --> 00:58:31,122
Wonderful...
800
00:58:39,987 --> 00:58:42,289
I didn't know you couldn't swim...
801
00:58:42,835 --> 00:58:43,315
I had an old-style education,
I don't take to it!
802
00:58:43,315 --> 00:58:45,934
I had an old-style education,
I don't take to it!
803
00:58:47,060 --> 00:58:49,874
- I'll hold you underneath...
- Under what?
804
00:58:50,548 --> 00:58:54,963
Your back, naturally...
Relax, let yourself go.
805
00:58:54,963 --> 00:58:57,235
What a body...
blessed be the water...
806
00:58:57,235 --> 00:58:57,901
What a body...
blessed be the water...
807
00:58:58,003 --> 00:58:59,727
...that embraces you!
808
00:59:03,892 --> 00:59:05,266
Very good!
809
00:59:07,380 --> 00:59:08,874
Back hand!
810
00:59:10,484 --> 00:59:10,900
Now it's my turn!
Like that!
811
00:59:10,900 --> 00:59:14,610
Now it's my turn!
Like that!
812
00:59:18,324 --> 00:59:20,179
Back hand!
813
00:59:21,492 --> 00:59:23,150
Marvellous...
814
00:59:25,204 --> 00:59:26,895
Excellent...
815
00:59:32,308 --> 00:59:35,756
- My ankle...
- Did you twist your ankle?
816
00:59:35,892 --> 00:59:38,357
Let's hope it's nothing,
lean on me...
817
00:59:40,629 --> 00:59:42,320
What a sight!
818
00:59:46,548 --> 00:59:50,705
Trust me, don't worry.
Relax...
819
00:59:51,253 --> 00:59:52,085
How strange, when I was 18
I had the same accident...
820
00:59:52,085 --> 00:59:56,973
How strange, when I was 18
I had the same accident...
821
00:59:57,493 --> 01:00:02,000
My opponent began to massage me,
like you're doing...
822
01:00:02,837 --> 01:00:06,132
- He was my first love.
- What a strange coincidence!
823
01:00:07,029 --> 01:00:10,226
Maybe Giambattista Vico
was right...
824
01:00:10,325 --> 01:00:12,662
- Was that his name?
- No!
825
01:00:12,662 --> 01:00:14,156
That history course guy...
826
01:00:14,293 --> 01:00:19,247
Ah, right, the things one remembers
after years. Well, not so many!
827
01:00:19,349 --> 01:00:19,734
- You're very young!
- I wouldn't say very young...
828
01:00:19,734 --> 01:00:24,306
- You're very young!
- I wouldn't say very young...
829
01:00:24,405 --> 01:00:26,893
Don't be immodest,
with such beautiful skin...
830
01:00:26,998 --> 01:00:29,998
- Commander...
- Mary, what happened?
831
01:00:30,101 --> 01:00:33,333
- Nothing, nothing!
- Did you fall and hurt yourself?
832
01:00:33,333 --> 01:00:34,381
- Nothing, nothing!
- Did you fall and hurt yourself?
833
01:00:34,486 --> 01:00:37,520
No, it's nothing,
a twisted ankle...
834
01:00:37,654 --> 01:00:40,436
Yes, it's nothing...
the commander has a golden touch.
835
01:00:40,566 --> 01:00:42,900
I didn't know you had
thaumaturgic skills...
836
01:00:43,062 --> 01:00:45,331
Just some practice!
837
01:00:46,390 --> 01:00:47,127
I'm better already, darling...
838
01:00:47,127 --> 01:00:48,239
I'm better already, darling...
839
01:00:48,310 --> 01:00:50,415
I'll go and arrange dinner.
840
01:00:50,582 --> 01:00:52,917
Naturally our guests
are welcome to join us...
841
01:00:53,079 --> 01:00:55,861
Yes, a great idea...
842
01:00:55,959 --> 01:00:59,341
- We wouldn'twant to trouble you.
- It's no trouble!
843
01:00:59,543 --> 01:01:01,046
- In fact, they could stay the night.
- Maybe they'll be uncomfortable.
844
01:01:01,046 --> 01:01:05,553
- In fact, they could stay the night.
- Maybe they'll be uncomfortable.
845
01:01:05,686 --> 01:01:08,982
There's the guest room, which
is always better than a hotel!
846
01:01:09,079 --> 01:01:13,040
Yes, she's right.
They'll be just fine...
847
01:01:13,175 --> 01:01:17,103
The guest room,
now there's a solution!
848
01:01:23,127 --> 01:01:27,317
Go on, you brute! You guzzle gas,
then quit on me!
849
01:01:27,415 --> 01:01:28,599
Are you hungover, or what?
850
01:01:28,599 --> 01:01:29,712
Are you hungover, or what?
851
01:01:31,447 --> 01:01:33,935
Can't you see your car's smoking?
852
01:01:34,071 --> 01:01:37,486
She's got all the vices,
this mechanic's harlot!
853
01:01:46,807 --> 01:01:50,255
White smoke...
'habemus papa'!
854
01:01:54,008 --> 01:01:55,917
'Habemus' seized engine!
855
01:02:03,256 --> 01:02:04,271
Marta?
856
01:02:05,432 --> 01:02:07,025
Hey, Marta!
857
01:02:08,344 --> 01:02:09,976
What are you doing?
My driving exhausted you!
858
01:02:09,976 --> 01:02:11,700
What are you doing?
My driving exhausted you!
859
01:02:12,120 --> 01:02:13,494
Yes, a little...
860
01:02:13,625 --> 01:02:16,941
Since the ferry leaves
tomorrow morning, we'll wait here.
861
01:02:17,080 --> 01:02:20,342
We'll get something to eat,
then get some sleep!
862
01:02:20,472 --> 01:02:23,123
Yes, I'm as hungry as a wolf!
863
01:02:24,344 --> 01:02:26,231
A she-wolf!
864
01:02:26,680 --> 01:02:28,568
Hungry, huh?
865
01:02:29,656 --> 01:02:33,169
Go Robertuzzo, do your worst,
this is a great opportunityy!
866
01:02:33,305 --> 01:02:34,799
Here I am, darling!
867
01:02:35,033 --> 01:02:37,145
- This is my bedroom.
- Is it?
868
01:02:37,145 --> 01:02:37,744
- This is my bedroom.
- Is it?
869
01:02:37,913 --> 01:02:39,636
I always sleep alone...
870
01:02:39,833 --> 01:02:44,273
I sleep alone, my husband
has an awful habit of snoring.
871
01:02:44,377 --> 01:02:48,949
- Aren't you scared?
- Yes, by every little noise...
872
01:02:49,145 --> 01:02:51,161
And the night is long
when spent alone...
873
01:02:51,161 --> 01:02:52,950
And the night is long
when spent alone...
874
01:02:53,081 --> 01:02:54,870
You're telling me...
875
01:02:55,001 --> 01:02:57,587
What? But you have
a beautiful wife!
876
01:02:57,817 --> 01:03:01,200
She won't talk to me,
my wife is frigid... frozen!
877
01:03:01,337 --> 01:03:02,864
- Mary?
- Yes?
878
01:03:03,194 --> 01:03:05,081
The commander must be tired,
we should let him rest...
879
01:03:05,081 --> 01:03:06,805
The commander must be tired,
we should let him rest...
880
01:03:07,034 --> 01:03:10,001
We were saying...
the commander asked...
881
01:03:10,106 --> 01:03:14,067
...if tomorrow a trip
to Etna would be possible.
882
01:03:14,202 --> 01:03:15,446
- Etna?
- Yes.
883
01:03:15,610 --> 01:03:17,268
With gusto!
884
01:03:17,530 --> 01:03:18,617
- Goodnight dear...
- Goodnight madam, and thank you...
885
01:03:18,617 --> 01:03:19,730
- Goodnight dear...
- Goodnight madam, and thank you...
886
01:03:22,778 --> 01:03:24,567
Goodnight, Mary...
887
01:03:28,922 --> 01:03:30,329
Coco?
888
01:03:30,874 --> 01:03:32,346
What's up now?
889
01:03:32,346 --> 01:03:32,728
What's up now?
890
01:03:32,826 --> 01:03:38,423
What's up? It's night, we're in bed...
you're a woman and I'm a man.
891
01:03:38,715 --> 01:03:39,959
Oof...
892
01:03:40,090 --> 01:03:45,524
Coco, if you're getting nowhere with
the honorable, at least comfort me!
893
01:03:45,754 --> 01:03:46,266
- Forget it, I'm tired!
- You can't do that!
894
01:03:46,266 --> 01:03:49,495
- Forget it, I'm tired!
- You can't do that!
895
01:03:49,594 --> 01:03:51,569
I don't want to do anything!
896
01:03:52,251 --> 01:03:57,139
- But it's ridiculous to sleep.
- Have a heart attack!
897
01:03:57,243 --> 01:03:59,707
You've kept me awake
for two nights now!
898
01:03:59,707 --> 01:04:03,963
You've kept me awake
for two nights now!
899
01:04:03,963 --> 01:04:05,752
Maybe a coffee...
900
01:04:16,123 --> 01:04:17,814
Where's that skunk going?
901
01:04:23,132 --> 01:04:24,823
Well... maybe...
902
01:04:31,452 --> 01:04:34,321
Of course, I'll bring it
to your room in a moment!
903
01:04:34,555 --> 01:04:38,516
- Thank you, you're very kind...
- Oh, it's nothing!
904
01:04:41,531 --> 01:04:44,117
- Matilde!
- What is it tonight?
905
01:04:44,220 --> 01:04:47,089
- What did our guest want?
- Acoffee.
906
01:04:47,228 --> 01:04:50,905
- Ah, he's getting ready.
- Shall I make it?
907
01:04:51,036 --> 01:04:55,164
Sure... and go get
my tranquillizers.
908
01:04:59,580 --> 01:05:05,331
There... a couple
of sleeping pills...
909
01:05:07,837 --> 01:05:08,605
That'll put him to sleep, and I
can play "Decameron" games!
910
01:05:08,605 --> 01:05:13,842
That'll put him to sleep, and I
can play "Decameron" games!
911
01:05:16,317 --> 01:05:17,843
Come!
912
01:05:20,925 --> 01:05:22,525
- It's sugared.
- Thanks.
913
01:05:22,525 --> 01:05:23,986
- It's sugared.
- Thanks.
914
01:05:27,549 --> 01:05:30,200
Coco, wake up!
915
01:05:30,909 --> 01:05:33,469
- Coffee...
- What?
916
01:05:33,469 --> 01:05:34,930
Is it time to get up?
917
01:05:35,069 --> 01:05:36,445
No, stay in bed, we're
going to do a little exercise...
918
01:05:36,445 --> 01:05:39,795
No, stay in bed, we're
going to do a little exercise...
919
01:05:40,157 --> 01:05:44,598
Drink, little one...
Nice?
920
01:05:45,886 --> 01:05:48,057
Disgusting!
921
01:05:49,470 --> 01:05:49,949
Coco, stop playing around!
Don't be a fool!
922
01:05:49,949 --> 01:05:53,626
Coco, stop playing around!
Don't be a fool!
923
01:05:54,205 --> 01:05:56,627
What's got into you?
924
01:05:56,734 --> 01:06:00,378
How can a woman like you
not have blood in her veins?
925
01:06:02,654 --> 01:06:03,550
Coco?
926
01:06:03,550 --> 01:06:03,931
Coco?
927
01:06:05,214 --> 01:06:10,265
Albertini brought me
the mummy of Ramses II!
928
01:06:26,046 --> 01:06:27,388
Commander?
929
01:06:27,582 --> 01:06:31,007
Commander... were you taking
advantage of an honorable's wife?
930
01:06:31,519 --> 01:06:33,461
Sleep, cuckold!
931
01:06:34,270 --> 01:06:36,889
What a fabulous woman!
932
01:06:38,366 --> 01:06:41,301
Madam?
Madam!
933
01:06:41,919 --> 01:06:45,087
It's Pedicò!
Your husband's asleep...
934
01:06:45,087 --> 01:06:45,817
It's Pedicò!
Your husband's asleep...
935
01:06:46,686 --> 01:06:49,654
Shall we proceed?
936
01:06:53,471 --> 01:06:58,783
You made a vow, huh?
I don't like vows...
937
01:07:01,375 --> 01:07:08,565
What a woman! How can you sleep
next to this fat-assed pachyderm!
938
01:07:13,279 --> 01:07:15,451
Is the cuckold upset?
939
01:07:15,968 --> 01:07:21,434
Come, I'll take you to my room.
Don't worry, I'll handle it...
940
01:07:21,663 --> 01:07:24,511
Come with me...
941
01:07:38,623 --> 01:07:40,663
Holy Mother!
942
01:07:40,832 --> 01:07:43,582
Madam... madam!
943
01:07:44,704 --> 01:07:46,591
What a beautiful woman!
944
01:07:48,032 --> 01:07:49,461
- Who is it?
- Me.
945
01:07:49,696 --> 01:07:51,998
- What do you want?
- Open, I'm scared!
946
01:07:52,096 --> 01:07:53,689
Scared of what?
947
01:07:53,792 --> 01:07:56,410
Oh God, Carmelo!
The ghosts!
948
01:07:56,897 --> 01:07:58,936
Now it's ghosts!
949
01:08:00,129 --> 01:08:02,103
- One moment!
- The ghosts!
950
01:08:02,592 --> 01:08:04,894
Open Carmelo, there are ghosts!
951
01:08:05,056 --> 01:08:06,747
One moment!
952
01:08:07,105 --> 01:08:09,974
Carmelo, let me in!
953
01:08:10,241 --> 01:08:12,477
What's got into her?
954
01:08:13,825 --> 01:08:17,502
- What is it?
- I'm scared, I heard noises.
955
01:08:17,632 --> 01:08:21,942
I saw ghosts in the garden.
Let me stay. I'll be quiet!
956
01:08:22,081 --> 01:08:25,463
- Carmelo, please!
- Damn those ghosts!
957
01:08:43,809 --> 01:08:46,013
I'LL WAIT FOR YOU
IN MY ROOM AT MIDNIGHT
958
01:08:47,074 --> 01:08:51,776
Now we'll see who's
a cuckold, dear Pedicò!
959
01:08:57,953 --> 01:09:02,525
No one stops. Maybe they think
I've hurt my thumb?
960
01:09:06,754 --> 01:09:09,820
Come, young man...
have you been waiting long?
961
01:09:09,923 --> 01:09:13,338
No, I was a child
when I got here!
962
01:09:13,826 --> 01:09:14,971
Hop in, quick!
963
01:09:15,075 --> 01:09:17,944
- Thanks...
- Buckle up, we're off!
964
01:09:20,162 --> 01:09:22,072
Ready, go!
965
01:09:30,402 --> 01:09:33,122
- This car's fast, you know?
- Right.
966
01:09:33,122 --> 01:09:35,741
- Where are you going?
- Catania.
967
01:09:35,811 --> 01:09:38,974
Perfect, I'm going
to Sicily too!
968
01:09:39,619 --> 01:09:42,652
Listen to that amazing engine?
And get the interior!
969
01:09:42,755 --> 01:09:46,846
Carpet, air conditioning,
a top-end stereo!
970
01:09:46,947 --> 01:09:48,954
Put the radio on!
971
01:09:51,075 --> 01:09:54,555
Intense traffic has blocked
Highway 213...
972
01:09:54,723 --> 01:09:57,374
...and thick fog is reported
on mountain stretches.
973
01:09:59,140 --> 01:10:03,296
Hold tight,
we're taking off!
974
01:10:11,012 --> 01:10:15,875
Attention all drivers...
975
01:10:15,875 --> 01:10:21,178
Police are looking for a Maserati,
stolen one hour ago in Naples.
976
01:10:21,348 --> 01:10:25,603
The thief is an escapee
from a mental clinic.
977
01:10:25,700 --> 01:10:28,034
He is believed dangerous...
978
01:10:28,196 --> 01:10:33,466
...because he's also half blind.
We end this news report here.
979
01:10:33,860 --> 01:10:36,926
We return to our
light music program.
980
01:10:37,412 --> 01:10:40,511
Did you turn the wipers on?
They've got two speeds.
981
01:10:58,916 --> 01:11:00,323
Fantastic, no?
982
01:11:10,245 --> 01:11:12,612
- Who's that?
- My grandpa!
983
01:11:14,501 --> 01:11:17,884
Are you sure this engine's
so fabulous?
984
01:11:22,437 --> 01:11:27,140
You're right, young man... at 150mph
the spark plugs exploded!
985
01:11:27,365 --> 01:11:30,464
No, it was me...
I was shitting my pants!
986
01:11:39,878 --> 01:11:42,398
- Where are you going?
- To the bathroom, for a pee...
987
01:11:42,534 --> 01:11:44,290
- You can't.
- Why not?
988
01:11:44,422 --> 01:11:47,334
I need to go first,
I'm bursting to pee...
989
01:11:47,334 --> 01:11:49,276
- I'm bursting too!
- But I'm an honorable!
990
01:11:49,414 --> 01:11:51,105
Of course, your excellency!
991
01:12:00,614 --> 01:12:03,265
Christ, she's heavy!
992
01:12:03,750 --> 01:12:07,547
After all this effort,
should I fuck her twwice?
993
01:12:11,686 --> 01:12:15,331
Madam, no one will disturb you here,
this is my wife's room...
994
01:12:15,463 --> 01:12:17,186
I'll be right back...
995
01:12:17,767 --> 01:12:21,661
Madam Mary,
I got your message...
996
01:12:21,990 --> 01:12:26,082
It's midnight... madam?
I can't see anyone here...
997
01:12:27,590 --> 01:12:28,801
Coco!
998
01:12:30,375 --> 01:12:33,506
What happened?
What did that pig do to you?
999
01:12:34,151 --> 01:12:37,828
What happened?
You're frozen, what did he do to you?
1000
01:12:40,487 --> 01:12:43,015
- Oh, mercy!
- Madam, it's me, La Noce...
1001
01:12:43,015 --> 01:12:47,041
Are you crazy?
If my husband sees us he'll shoot you!
1002
01:12:47,271 --> 01:12:51,200
Ok, but not that way, I'm safer
leaving by the window...
1003
01:12:51,303 --> 01:12:53,638
Just go, please!
I beg you!
1004
01:12:54,439 --> 01:12:57,123
- Mary, what are you doing here?
- Who is it?!
1005
01:12:58,215 --> 01:13:02,110
I was going to my bathroom,
you were taking ages!
1006
01:13:02,567 --> 01:13:05,884
- Really?
- Absolutely, Carmelo... come.
1007
01:13:05,991 --> 01:13:09,985
Go on, the bathroom will be free
all night. Get inside.
1008
01:13:30,984 --> 01:13:36,003
A MAN LEFT BY THE WINDOW OF
YOUR WIFE'S ROOM. YOU'RE A CUCKOLD!
1009
01:13:38,792 --> 01:13:40,832
I'll make him pay for this!
1010
01:13:43,977 --> 01:13:48,133
Stop joking, Coco, answer me!
There'll be hell to pay if you die!
1011
01:13:48,361 --> 01:13:51,557
For a girl like you,
it would be criminal!
1012
01:13:51,913 --> 01:13:56,037
Coco, answer me!
Be good, just one word...
1013
01:13:57,417 --> 01:14:01,727
- Commander...
- Thank you, God!
1014
01:14:01,833 --> 01:14:05,728
...fuck off.
- It's ok, thanks anyway.
1015
01:14:38,954 --> 01:14:40,864
Take that!
1016
01:14:46,154 --> 01:14:49,700
Carmelo! You know I don't like it
when you get rough!
1017
01:15:20,811 --> 01:15:23,778
I'm full!
An empty one is coming behind...
1018
01:15:31,723 --> 01:15:33,446
Hey, want a ride?
1019
01:15:33,643 --> 01:15:38,051
Ok, but you'll have to get in back
with the flowers.
1020
01:15:38,443 --> 01:15:39,970
- What, in the back?
- Yes, why?
1021
01:15:40,075 --> 01:15:41,548
Where the corpse goes?
1022
01:15:41,548 --> 01:15:46,469
- No one else has claimed it...
- But someone might.
1023
01:15:46,604 --> 01:15:49,124
- Who said so?
- The newspaper.
1024
01:15:49,900 --> 01:15:52,966
"Five claimed dead
in crash", it said.
1025
01:15:54,284 --> 01:15:59,180
- Go on, slowly... good.
- I hurt everywhere.
1026
01:15:59,180 --> 01:16:04,231
I can't even touch myself for luck.
Would you mind giving me a scratch?
1027
01:16:08,204 --> 01:16:09,895
Go, Nicola!
1028
01:16:18,412 --> 01:16:21,827
Kitty, beware the big cat!
Good day, madam...
1029
01:16:22,316 --> 01:16:24,869
- Good day, honorable.
- You're a marvellous woman.
1030
01:16:25,005 --> 01:16:29,096
- Thanks...
- I'd do anything for you.
1031
01:16:29,228 --> 01:16:31,948
Please, I wouldn't want
to trouble you...
1032
01:16:31,948 --> 01:16:34,850
I'm sorry about last night,
but I'm kept under strict control...
1033
01:16:34,989 --> 01:16:36,898
My wife is
a very jealous woman...
1034
01:16:37,037 --> 01:16:39,787
- By the way, have you seen her around?
- Yes, earlier...
1035
01:16:39,885 --> 01:16:42,951
...then they went
for a hike on the mountain.
1036
01:16:43,085 --> 01:16:47,213
They've gone already?
She's alone with your husband?
1037
01:16:47,213 --> 01:16:49,864
- And no one else?
- No one...
1038
01:16:49,997 --> 01:16:55,910
- Aren't you jealous of your husband?
- I'm a human being too!
1039
01:16:56,045 --> 01:16:59,820
We're all human, but aren't you scared
something might happen?
1040
01:16:59,949 --> 01:17:03,113
Well, my husband's
"just smoke" these days...
1041
01:17:03,245 --> 01:17:06,148
Wonderful!
His gun's stopped firing!
1042
01:17:07,437 --> 01:17:10,405
With me you'll feel
you're on the front line!
1043
01:17:26,862 --> 01:17:28,717
The lava reached here in '71.
1044
01:17:28,878 --> 01:17:32,107
Craters can erupt
when you least expect it...
1045
01:17:32,238 --> 01:17:34,693
It sounds dangerous!
1046
01:17:34,926 --> 01:17:38,670
In fact, my husband never
comes here, he's scared!
1047
01:17:38,670 --> 01:17:42,315
As a child, he very nearly died
in an eruption...
1048
01:17:42,606 --> 01:17:43,915
Are you scared?
1049
01:17:44,046 --> 01:17:46,763
With a woman like you,
I'm only scared of myself...
1050
01:17:46,863 --> 01:17:48,870
Commander, what are you saying?
1051
01:17:48,975 --> 01:17:50,763
Delinquent!
1052
01:17:51,982 --> 01:17:54,949
Walking on these stones
isn't easy...
1053
01:17:55,055 --> 01:17:58,404
But don't you love
this Dantesque scene?
1054
01:17:58,543 --> 01:18:01,161
I have inner fires of my own!
1055
01:18:13,999 --> 01:18:16,520
- What are you looking at?
- I heard a noise...
1056
01:18:16,623 --> 01:18:18,827
...who knows what it was,
I can't see anything!
1057
01:18:18,991 --> 01:18:23,628
- Are you sure you can't see anything?
- Madam, you'll catch a cold!
1058
01:18:23,727 --> 01:18:28,005
- Then warm me!
- Yes, I'll set you on fire!
1059
01:18:28,463 --> 01:18:30,350
Not like that, madam!
1060
01:18:31,951 --> 01:18:33,609
An eruption!
1061
01:18:34,960 --> 01:18:36,454
Help!
1062
01:18:37,519 --> 01:18:41,033
Forgive me, Lord, if I have sinned!
Go away!
1063
01:18:41,136 --> 01:18:46,439
Are you leaving me in this hell?!
Wait, madam!
1064
01:18:49,872 --> 01:18:52,774
I'm a "respectable" woman!
1065
01:18:54,352 --> 01:18:58,443
Go away!
I'm a "respectable woman"!
1066
01:18:58,800 --> 01:19:00,775
Stop, wait!
1067
01:19:15,312 --> 01:19:19,241
- Ok, goodbye!
- I hope not!
1068
01:19:25,489 --> 01:19:28,561
Hi, Coco!
Where's the commander?
1069
01:19:28,561 --> 01:19:31,409
- On the vulcano!
- What, "he couldn't say no"?
1070
01:19:31,409 --> 01:19:35,152
- On the vulcano!
- Oh, "he lost his halo"!
1071
01:19:35,281 --> 01:19:39,788
Wait... blowing this up
sure must take a lot of puff!
1072
01:19:40,081 --> 01:19:42,154
What happened,
did they make you mayor?
1073
01:19:42,385 --> 01:19:44,654
No, I got a ride
with the undertaker!
1074
01:19:44,817 --> 01:19:47,632
How are you, my friend?
How lovely to see you!
1075
01:19:49,681 --> 01:19:53,129
Help, save him!
1076
01:19:53,234 --> 01:19:54,543
- He's resurfaced!
- Help!
1077
01:19:54,706 --> 01:19:58,088
- I can't swim!
- Leave it to me, madam!
1078
01:19:58,322 --> 01:19:59,696
Hold on!
1079
01:20:01,906 --> 01:20:03,913
Come on!
Here...
1080
01:20:04,306 --> 01:20:05,964
Come on, up...
1081
01:20:07,953 --> 01:20:10,506
Not like that,
you'll snap his neck!
1082
01:20:19,154 --> 01:20:21,423
What a villa!
Is anyone home?
1083
01:20:22,130 --> 01:20:23,537
He's alive!
1084
01:20:25,523 --> 01:20:28,872
- The commander...
- What do you mean? Explain!
1085
01:20:30,962 --> 01:20:33,483
Let me go, Marta,
I'm going to kill someone!
1086
01:20:33,682 --> 01:20:37,195
- Are you spying on me?!
- What? I can't hear you!
1087
01:20:42,451 --> 01:20:45,004
Bitch!
Is this a vacation, or something?
1088
01:20:45,138 --> 01:20:47,593
I take what fucking vacation
I feel like! I'm a free woman!
1089
01:20:47,699 --> 01:20:52,685
No, you do what I tell you!
You owe me respect!
1090
01:20:52,787 --> 01:20:55,820
It's me who defends you
from being exploited!
1091
01:20:59,539 --> 01:21:03,946
Quick, my husband will be worried!
He'll make a scene!
1092
01:21:04,051 --> 01:21:07,400
Don't run,
take pity on my foot!
1093
01:21:08,339 --> 01:21:11,121
If you want to be a slut,
you have to take it seriously!
1094
01:21:11,252 --> 01:21:13,772
The only slut around here
is your sister!
1095
01:21:15,348 --> 01:21:17,933
- How dare you?
- What do you want?!
1096
01:21:18,035 --> 01:21:20,817
How dare you raise your voice
to a lady!
1097
01:21:20,915 --> 01:21:25,007
- Who the fuck are you?
- I'm the fucking master of this house!
1098
01:21:25,171 --> 01:21:28,106
Go fuck yourself,
you fucking chatterbox!
1099
01:21:31,604 --> 01:21:33,993
Fuck!
You don't know who I am!
1100
01:21:34,132 --> 01:21:35,506
Oh my foot!
1101
01:21:35,828 --> 01:21:37,289
Move your ass!
1102
01:21:38,676 --> 01:21:42,735
Marta, how come you're here?
And dressed like that?
1103
01:21:42,868 --> 01:21:47,407
- I came to meet your lover.
- How dare you, I demand an apology!
1104
01:21:47,637 --> 01:21:48,880
Here!
1105
01:21:49,428 --> 01:21:51,501
- Fetusa!
- You bitch!
1106
01:21:51,668 --> 01:21:53,556
What are you doing?
Stop it!
1107
01:21:55,572 --> 01:21:58,736
Albertini, darling,
what did they do to you!
1108
01:21:58,997 --> 01:22:01,812
Enough, you're ladies!
1109
01:22:04,661 --> 01:22:07,083
Ladies, calm down!
This is a respectable house!
1110
01:22:07,252 --> 01:22:09,325
Shut up, you old whoremonger!
1111
01:22:09,428 --> 01:22:11,632
Marta, please, try to understand!
1112
01:22:11,829 --> 01:22:13,455
It's a question of business!
1113
01:22:13,557 --> 01:22:17,169
I did it to save you
from this skunk!
1114
01:22:17,397 --> 01:22:20,267
He preys on men's wives,
so I brought him a fake wife.
1115
01:22:20,373 --> 01:22:22,795
How dare you speak like that!
1116
01:22:23,413 --> 01:22:25,322
Help! Help!
1117
01:22:25,845 --> 01:22:29,871
- Madam, I'm coming!
- It was him!
1118
01:22:30,709 --> 01:22:34,506
Let him go,
I'll deal with him!
1119
01:23:26,678 --> 01:23:29,875
This is a kidnapping,
I'll see you jailed!
1120
01:23:30,103 --> 01:23:31,415
- What's that?
- Atranquillizer.
1121
01:23:31,415 --> 01:23:34,928
I don't want to be tranquillized,
I'm a free citizen!
1122
01:23:35,062 --> 01:23:38,892
What's broken, doctor?
1123
01:23:39,351 --> 01:23:41,620
Can't you talk?
Are you dumb?
1124
01:23:41,751 --> 01:23:44,533
Trust me to land
the dumb doctor!
1125
01:23:44,662 --> 01:23:48,311
I'll make sure
you pay for all this!
1126
01:23:48,311 --> 01:23:50,613
Hear that?
You'll pay all damages!
1127
01:23:50,967 --> 01:23:55,190
- Who, me?
- Let him be, he's in shock!
1128
01:23:55,703 --> 01:23:58,453
I'm the victim
of a diabolical plot!
1129
01:23:58,552 --> 01:24:02,065
- Shut up, you prince of shit!
- How dare you be informal?
1130
01:24:02,167 --> 01:24:04,589
You, sir, are a prince of shit!
1131
01:24:04,695 --> 01:24:07,281
- And a cuckold!
- That's slander, I've done nothing!
1132
01:24:07,384 --> 01:24:10,035
Maybe, but he deserves
to be a cuckold, and so do you!
1133
01:24:10,551 --> 01:24:13,901
What fucking language is this?!
Respect the fucking nun, please!
1134
01:24:14,040 --> 01:24:16,789
- May peace be with you...
- And with you too...
1135
01:24:17,016 --> 01:24:19,640
You're all reunited...
How are you, my son?
1136
01:24:19,640 --> 01:24:22,542
- Fine, compared to my uncle.
- How's your uncle?
1137
01:24:22,680 --> 01:24:23,832
He's dead!
1138
01:24:23,832 --> 01:24:26,385
I don't want no fucking sedatives!
1139
01:24:26,488 --> 01:24:30,645
- I don't know him...
- No one knows me!
1140
01:24:30,744 --> 01:24:35,632
Tomorrow, you'll find a certain story
in the newspaper...
1141
01:24:35,768 --> 01:24:39,249
Would you like to hear
a little preview?
1142
01:24:39,384 --> 01:24:44,119
"Once upon a time, an industrialist,
after polluting a river...
1143
01:24:44,217 --> 01:24:50,960
...with his stinking factory,
sought help from an honorable...
1144
01:24:51,064 --> 01:24:55,123
...who I won't name, but
will indicate with a nose!"
1145
01:25:05,209 --> 01:25:06,769
Thank you...
1146
01:25:06,872 --> 01:25:11,826
In this dovetailing of social needs
and industrial development...
1147
01:25:11,993 --> 01:25:14,895
...Commander La Noce,
who you all know...
1148
01:25:15,769 --> 01:25:21,617
...and Honorable Pedicò, assisting
in the political arena...
1149
01:25:21,881 --> 01:25:27,737
...have succeeded in saving a key
source of Italian employment...
1150
01:25:27,737 --> 01:25:31,053
...the Straccolone Company,
whose products...
1151
01:25:31,866 --> 01:25:34,517
...are now being sold abroad!
1152
01:25:37,497 --> 01:25:40,497
He's a secretary with flair,
not like that moron Albertini!
1153
01:25:40,666 --> 01:25:45,041
- He's so intelligent!
- So resourceful...
1154
01:25:53,082 --> 01:25:57,654
Can't you understand?
Night shifts are better than days!
1155
01:25:57,754 --> 01:26:01,103
- In what sense?
- The night shift pays more!
1156
01:26:01,242 --> 01:26:03,314
And you only work 5 hours!
1157
01:26:03,546 --> 01:26:07,482
Plus you can use your
daytime hours...
1158
01:26:07,482 --> 01:26:10,799
It's delicate...
I have to think about it...
1159
01:26:10,938 --> 01:26:13,272
There's nothing to discuss,
I fear no one...
1160
01:26:13,434 --> 01:26:15,322
What I want, I get!
1161
01:26:15,419 --> 01:26:19,313
I've decided to work nights,
and work nights I will, ok?!
1162
01:26:19,482 --> 01:26:21,009
Ok...
1163
01:26:31,739 --> 01:26:34,292
- Bye...
- Enjoy.
1164
01:26:35,611 --> 01:26:37,913
It's totally dead tonight...
1165
01:26:38,107 --> 01:26:40,660
- I've only done twwo cars...
- Lucky you!
1166
01:26:40,891 --> 01:26:42,899
Who's this princess?
1167
01:26:43,931 --> 01:26:45,403
What does she want?!
1168
01:26:45,403 --> 01:26:48,632
- You're off-limits!
- Idiot!
1169
01:26:48,731 --> 01:26:51,797
Look who's talking!
1170
01:26:52,699 --> 01:26:56,376
- Take a hike, or else!
- Yeah, move it!
1171
01:26:56,796 --> 01:26:59,185
What the fuck do you want from me?!
1172
01:27:01,436 --> 01:27:05,876
I'll teach you!
You bitches!
1173
01:27:21,820 --> 01:27:24,276
What's all this shit?
1174
01:27:26,269 --> 01:27:28,472
And who's he?
1175
01:27:28,572 --> 01:27:33,493
Listen daddy,
this is Franceschino's turf!
1176
01:27:33,724 --> 01:27:37,816
Franceschino?
Who's Franceschino?
1177
01:27:38,045 --> 01:27:44,340
Who the fuck is Franceschino?
Who is he?!
1178
01:27:45,725 --> 01:27:49,020
Frankie, show yourself...
1179
01:28:52,574 --> 01:28:56,087
- Franceschino, don't hurt me!
- Fuck off!
1180
01:28:56,830 --> 01:28:58,107
No!
1181
01:29:04,670 --> 01:29:07,769
Franceschino, you killed him!
1182
01:29:09,247 --> 01:29:10,654
Come on...
1183
01:29:11,551 --> 01:29:14,813
Did you get
the licence number?
1184
01:29:15,262 --> 01:29:17,270
Come on, darling, come...
1185
01:29:29,023 --> 01:29:34,141
THE END
1186
01:29:53,856 --> 01:29:56,311
THIS FILM IS A WORK OF FICTION.
1187
01:29:56,480 --> 01:29:59,163
WE'RE SORRY IF THERE IS ANY RESEMBLANCE
TO REAL PEOPLE OR INCIDENTS.
95117
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