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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:04,189 --> 00:01:09,235 WRONG MOVE 2 00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:46,452 l want you to go away. 3 00:04:47,079 --> 00:04:52,792 l'm selling out to a supermarket and will give you part of it. 4 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,380 No... 5 00:04:57,881 --> 00:05:00,341 don't say anything, Wilhelm dear. 6 00:05:00,759 --> 00:05:03,469 Wait till you have to. 7 00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:10,643 And don't lose that unrest and discontent of yours. 8 00:05:11,603 --> 00:05:14,730 You'll need it if you want to write. 9 00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:19,652 l'll enjoy life from now on. 10 00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:23,823 l'll be smoking when l cross the square. 11 00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:29,829 l'll be drinking a martini in the Heider Hof 12 00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:32,665 while reading your letters. 13 00:05:39,131 --> 00:05:43,009 l'll say, "With ice, please," when l order the martini. 14 00:07:05,717 --> 00:07:09,512 I'm not desperate, just angry and fed up. 15 00:07:10,222 --> 00:07:13,682 It's as if I had no tongue. 16 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:17,478 I haven't spoken for two days. 17 00:07:17,813 --> 00:07:21,565 Yet in my sleep l'm talking aII the time, says Mother. 18 00:07:22,234 --> 00:07:24,276 l want to be a writer, 19 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:27,696 but is that possibIe when you don't Iike peopIe? 20 00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:36,539 If onIy I couId write. Write! 21 00:07:58,645 --> 00:08:01,438 Bye. Do you have an evening show? 22 00:08:01,565 --> 00:08:03,065 No. 23 00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:06,485 Janine. 24 00:08:06,653 --> 00:08:08,654 l wanted to see you again. 25 00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:13,742 l can't look at you in that outfit. 26 00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:35,681 You've got something there. 27 00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:38,517 No, here. 28 00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:05,002 ln the course of time... 29 00:09:16,348 --> 00:09:21,727 The day I Ieft my hometown, it seemed alive for the first time, 30 00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:24,855 though only with the dreariness of those Ieft behind. 31 00:09:25,357 --> 00:09:28,901 Janine and my insuIt about her barkeeper outfit... 32 00:09:29,444 --> 00:09:31,654 I had aIready forgotten. 33 00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:33,656 Mother had packed my suitcase. 34 00:09:33,823 --> 00:09:35,908 On top she had put two books: 35 00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:38,577 Life of a Good-For-Nothing by Eichendorff, 36 00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:41,538 and Sentimental Education by FIaubert. 37 00:09:41,665 --> 00:09:47,294 I decided not to withdraw my arm if she'd link arms in the street, 38 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,756 as I'd aIways do for passers-by. 39 00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:55,636 In the taxi, she suddenIy toId me not to be intimidated 40 00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:59,974 if peopIe pointed out how usefuI a doctor or carpenter was 41 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:02,559 and how useIess my Iife was. 42 00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:08,816 PeopIe with restricted professions reminded her of dried-up snaiIs. 43 00:10:09,192 --> 00:10:10,943 l listened, 44 00:10:11,069 --> 00:10:13,779 but my thoughts weren't with her anymore. 45 00:10:16,533 --> 00:10:18,284 Your ticket. 46 00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:22,162 ln your other hand, Mother. 47 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,793 Why did you choose Bonn? 48 00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:31,964 l leafed through the novel you read recently. 49 00:10:35,302 --> 00:10:39,221 l'm fond of you, Wilhelm. Please don't forget me. 50 00:10:49,607 --> 00:10:53,652 I Ieft her to a fate I didn't beIieve in for myseIf. 51 00:10:54,487 --> 00:11:00,743 l imagined the taxi driver asking her whether he shouId take her home. 52 00:11:00,952 --> 00:11:03,329 By herseIf, she'd take the bus. 53 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:06,999 I feIt Iike combing my hair in the train window, 54 00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:10,669 but then I rather waited for the train to Ieave. 55 00:11:10,962 --> 00:11:15,257 Later, somewhere else, I wouId remember her better 56 00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:18,886 when she'd be far away. 57 00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:25,726 I hated that thought and forgot it. 58 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:28,062 It was a nice, peacefuI day. 59 00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:32,107 The gulls that had screamed above the sea fIew siIentIy over Iand. 60 00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:36,487 The canal we were passing was aIready a memory. 61 00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:39,073 l began to think ahead, 62 00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:43,243 intending to find out more about myseIf during this journey. 63 00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:47,414 Someone's nose must have bIed on the seat across from mine. 64 00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:37,191 LIFE OF A GOOD-FOR-NOTHING by Joseph von Eichendorff 65 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:42,738 "Chapter One. 66 00:13:42,864 --> 00:13:47,826 The wheeI of my father's miII was once more turning and whirring merrily. 67 00:13:48,119 --> 00:13:50,662 The melting snow trickled steadiIy from the roof, 68 00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:54,541 and sparrows chirped and hopped about. 69 00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:59,296 I sat on the doorstep and rubbed the sIeep from my eyes. 70 00:14:00,006 --> 00:14:02,925 It feIt great in the warm sunshine. 71 00:14:03,384 --> 00:14:05,552 Then Father came out of the house. 72 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:08,555 He'd been busy in the miII since daybreak, 73 00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:12,851 and his nightcap... his nightcap was awry." 74 00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:05,487 Hey, what's that? 75 00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:20,766 Τhe woman who filled you with such longing... 76 00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:24,227 is Τherese Farner. 77 00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:27,898 She's an actress. 78 00:18:30,443 --> 00:18:33,570 You'll want to know why my nose is bleeding. 79 00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:36,823 lt is the memory. 80 00:18:38,993 --> 00:18:42,913 Maybe l'll tell you about it at breakfast tomorrow. 81 00:18:44,832 --> 00:18:47,167 You know the story of St. Januarius, 82 00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:50,837 whose blood is kept in a church in Naples? 83 00:18:53,508 --> 00:18:56,885 lt becomes fluid once a year and stirs... 84 00:18:58,221 --> 00:19:00,639 on the anniversary of his death. 85 00:19:18,991 --> 00:19:20,992 Where are you going? 86 00:19:21,619 --> 00:19:23,370 Bonn. 87 00:19:39,637 --> 00:19:41,513 Τhere's only one ticket. 88 00:19:43,474 --> 00:19:45,851 No, you aren't dreaming. 89 00:19:46,561 --> 00:19:48,770 Two tickets are missing. 90 00:19:49,897 --> 00:19:53,483 You can pay for your companions on the train, of course. 91 00:19:54,569 --> 00:19:57,946 Something terrible happened to me today. 92 00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:02,200 Only half price for the girl! 93 00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:05,412 l'm still confused. 94 00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:12,752 When l had left the house, l noticed l'd forgotten my umbrella. 95 00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:15,380 But no, l had opened it. 96 00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:19,509 l had odd socks on too. 97 00:20:20,303 --> 00:20:23,680 No, l can't do it. lt was indescribable. 98 00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:25,891 Was it raining? 99 00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:29,269 No, that wasn't the point. 100 00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:41,531 l recognize that salute from old newsreels. 101 00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:48,663 Go on. Τhank the gentleman for your ticket. 102 00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:16,311 Have you decided on something? 103 00:23:17,396 --> 00:23:22,317 l was thinking maybe minced veal, dumplings, and salad for three. 104 00:23:23,986 --> 00:23:26,488 We'll drink a beer and an orange juice. 105 00:23:29,033 --> 00:23:32,911 Eichinger - l mean the conductor - gave me a note for you. 106 00:23:33,079 --> 00:23:35,747 "Carriage 83, compartment 3, window seat." 107 00:23:35,915 --> 00:23:39,084 lt can only be for you. Certainly not for me. 108 00:25:18,017 --> 00:25:20,310 What profession did you give? 109 00:25:20,436 --> 00:25:22,478 l'm a singer. 110 00:25:22,897 --> 00:25:25,857 And she's a street performer. 111 00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:40,205 WRlΤER 112 00:25:55,387 --> 00:25:56,971 Good night. 113 00:26:13,739 --> 00:26:16,783 That afternoon, seeing the woman on the train 114 00:26:16,909 --> 00:26:19,452 seemed a big adventure already. 115 00:26:19,620 --> 00:26:23,122 l thought l'd regret it the rest of my Iife 116 00:26:23,249 --> 00:26:25,375 if I didn't pursue it. 117 00:26:26,752 --> 00:26:32,131 Get me 06351 -7270, please. 118 00:26:37,429 --> 00:26:40,848 But now, in this ordinary room with its buIky bed, 119 00:26:40,975 --> 00:26:43,601 pIastic wastebasket, and neon light over the sink, 120 00:26:43,769 --> 00:26:46,771 I was as defIated as my surroundings. 121 00:26:46,939 --> 00:26:50,650 l was even practicing what I wouId say on the phone. 122 00:26:50,776 --> 00:26:54,070 For exampIe, "I'm dying to see you." 123 00:26:54,989 --> 00:26:59,284 I tried to shake off the compuIsion. l would not start blabbing. 124 00:26:59,451 --> 00:27:02,578 If she said nothing, l would say nothing too. 125 00:27:03,205 --> 00:27:05,456 I Iooked down onto the square. 126 00:27:14,300 --> 00:27:17,385 AII of a sudden l had the urge to write. 127 00:27:17,511 --> 00:27:20,805 It wouId take my mind off her. 128 00:27:21,181 --> 00:27:24,434 This thought made the fear of a new person go away. 129 00:27:24,601 --> 00:27:26,978 I wanted to get to know her voice. 130 00:27:27,146 --> 00:27:31,274 I hoped it'd be as cIear as her gaze at me on the train. 131 00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:34,485 Afterwards l'd write, in great detail. 132 00:27:38,490 --> 00:27:41,534 "For the Iast two nights I haven't dreamed. 133 00:27:42,036 --> 00:27:45,455 I haven't cut my naiIs for over a week. 134 00:27:46,123 --> 00:27:49,292 l've worn the same shoes for a month. 135 00:27:50,419 --> 00:27:53,629 And l haven't thought about dying for years. 136 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:59,344 l've always felt everything would go on the same without me. 137 00:28:01,347 --> 00:28:05,933 But since l met you, l know what's happening to me." 138 00:28:07,978 --> 00:28:10,772 Could you make a song from that? 139 00:28:12,608 --> 00:28:14,901 lf you let me have the poem. 140 00:28:19,490 --> 00:28:21,908 l'll tell you my story soon. 141 00:28:23,035 --> 00:28:24,702 Maybe tonight. 142 00:28:29,500 --> 00:28:34,629 Just a hint. l ran in the 1 936 Berlin Olympics. 143 00:28:35,381 --> 00:28:37,507 Τhe 1 00 meters race. 144 00:28:37,883 --> 00:28:42,178 You refused to shake hands with Jesse Owens, just like your Fȕhrer. 145 00:28:43,472 --> 00:28:45,640 l only got to the semifinals. 146 00:28:46,058 --> 00:28:47,517 But... 147 00:28:48,435 --> 00:28:52,313 l probably wouldn't have shaken a black man's hand. 148 00:28:52,731 --> 00:28:54,399 And now? 149 00:28:56,902 --> 00:28:59,070 We'd better go for a walk. 150 00:29:26,765 --> 00:29:29,851 l wanted to start writing today for real. 151 00:29:30,644 --> 00:29:33,312 But l dreamed so much last night 152 00:29:33,439 --> 00:29:36,941 that it's impossible now to write about anything else. 153 00:29:38,277 --> 00:29:41,362 And just writing about dreams is - 154 00:29:42,698 --> 00:29:45,783 l want to write something that's absolutely necessary. 155 00:29:46,034 --> 00:29:48,202 Necessary like a house... 156 00:29:48,328 --> 00:29:50,913 or a glass of wine in the evening. 157 00:29:51,415 --> 00:29:53,458 Even more necessary. 158 00:30:37,294 --> 00:30:39,420 On the way here l noticed 159 00:30:40,005 --> 00:30:42,965 that Germany still has landscapes. 160 00:30:43,091 --> 00:30:45,259 l wanted to stop... 161 00:30:47,054 --> 00:30:49,180 but kept on going faster. 162 00:30:50,933 --> 00:30:53,684 l wanted to go for a walk with you, 163 00:30:54,144 --> 00:30:55,937 leave the city. 164 00:30:56,271 --> 00:30:58,648 We were just doing that. 165 00:32:27,654 --> 00:32:29,780 l wanted to talk to you. 166 00:32:30,657 --> 00:32:33,659 Nothing in particular. Just talk. 167 00:32:35,871 --> 00:32:37,705 But suddenly - 168 00:33:02,481 --> 00:33:05,149 You want to be alone with me? 169 00:33:05,275 --> 00:33:06,776 Not now. 170 00:33:08,153 --> 00:33:09,945 lt's good - 171 00:33:10,489 --> 00:33:14,158 lt's good we have company. Otherwise it would be worse. 172 00:33:15,869 --> 00:33:19,330 Τhis way, l at least feel as if l had a secret. 173 00:35:19,743 --> 00:35:23,078 Do you have any idea what pain is? 174 00:35:24,122 --> 00:35:28,375 Do you pigs know how a plane rushes 175 00:35:28,627 --> 00:35:30,294 through your brain? 176 00:35:54,194 --> 00:35:56,028 Τhis way! 177 00:36:37,070 --> 00:36:39,738 So many things are strange to you. 178 00:36:40,991 --> 00:36:43,033 l like that about you. 179 00:36:45,495 --> 00:36:48,414 l don't think you could write otherwise. 180 00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:53,377 What l don't like is... 181 00:36:55,046 --> 00:36:58,299 that you think only you can be that way. 182 00:37:03,471 --> 00:37:06,390 Grant that to others too. 183 00:37:14,816 --> 00:37:16,483 Excuse me. 184 00:37:17,986 --> 00:37:21,780 l heard you reciting poetry in the hotel today. 185 00:37:22,616 --> 00:37:24,950 l write poetry myself, 186 00:37:25,201 --> 00:37:29,580 so l followed you to ask you for your opinion. 187 00:37:31,207 --> 00:37:33,292 May l recite something? 188 00:37:52,896 --> 00:37:55,230 "l lay still half asleep 189 00:37:55,357 --> 00:37:57,775 when l heard the bells ringing. 190 00:37:58,109 --> 00:38:02,196 One struck so hard as if it struck me. 191 00:38:02,447 --> 00:38:06,158 l was so miserable that my skin peeled off. 192 00:38:06,618 --> 00:38:10,788 l felt l was not even a shadow in the entire cosmos. 193 00:38:10,956 --> 00:38:12,915 lt was terrible. 194 00:38:13,291 --> 00:38:16,585 Like a jellyfish, without any form, 195 00:38:16,962 --> 00:38:19,964 l was gliding through the spheres." 196 00:38:20,131 --> 00:38:22,132 Nobody's serving here. 197 00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:29,890 "A child stepped on me 198 00:38:30,016 --> 00:38:33,310 like on snail-infested, gelatinous, rotting mold. 199 00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:38,983 l yearned to spurt myself into the gutter. 200 00:38:39,317 --> 00:38:41,735 l belonged in a butcher shop, 201 00:38:41,903 --> 00:38:45,239 transparent and trembling in aspic. 202 00:38:45,907 --> 00:38:49,660 l fell through a trap door into a last dream... 203 00:38:50,161 --> 00:38:55,457 and hung there like a piece of meat on a hook. 204 00:38:56,292 --> 00:39:01,005 And a hanged man with a sign that read 'l am a traitor' 205 00:39:01,131 --> 00:39:04,842 convulsed as myself from a plum tree. 206 00:39:04,968 --> 00:39:09,013 From my terror-stricken stiff member sperm was shooting 207 00:39:09,139 --> 00:39:11,724 and dripping on a white sheet. 208 00:39:11,850 --> 00:39:15,811 Since then l've been living under a bell jar, 209 00:39:15,937 --> 00:39:20,024 my rotting consciousness steaming up the glass. 210 00:39:22,444 --> 00:39:24,445 Why must there be... 211 00:39:26,114 --> 00:39:28,323 between me and the world 212 00:39:28,450 --> 00:39:30,951 such a huge difference?" 213 00:39:51,973 --> 00:39:54,266 l should introduce myself. 214 00:39:54,726 --> 00:39:56,769 My name is Bernhard Landau. 215 00:39:57,562 --> 00:39:59,605 l'm Austrian. 216 00:40:00,774 --> 00:40:02,983 l've never amounted to much... 217 00:40:04,569 --> 00:40:06,820 and l hope it'll stay that way. 218 00:40:07,864 --> 00:40:11,075 l get injured once a year. 219 00:40:11,493 --> 00:40:14,536 Τhis year l fell on the edge of a chair 220 00:40:14,662 --> 00:40:17,414 and gashed the corners of my mouth. 221 00:40:17,707 --> 00:40:19,416 lt's already healed. 222 00:40:21,753 --> 00:40:26,298 An uncle of mine owns a big bakery. He has an estate in the area. 223 00:40:27,675 --> 00:40:30,094 We could all stay with him. 224 00:40:31,763 --> 00:40:33,931 He wanted to be a composer 225 00:40:34,099 --> 00:40:36,892 and suffers now and then from being a capitalist. 226 00:40:37,352 --> 00:40:39,770 But l think those people 227 00:40:39,896 --> 00:40:42,272 are the real capitalists. 228 00:42:14,365 --> 00:42:17,784 Put your gun away, Uncle, or we'll shoot back. 229 00:42:19,871 --> 00:42:22,915 lt's me, Bernhard from Vienna. 230 00:42:24,375 --> 00:42:26,376 l have some friends with me. 231 00:42:26,836 --> 00:42:29,087 We'd like to stay the night. 232 00:42:35,345 --> 00:42:37,387 Τhis isn't my uncle. 233 00:42:39,390 --> 00:42:41,892 And it's the wrong house. 234 00:42:42,393 --> 00:42:44,728 lt's the wrong time too. 235 00:42:44,854 --> 00:42:46,897 l don't actually know you... 236 00:42:47,899 --> 00:42:50,275 but l'm glad you came. 237 00:42:52,237 --> 00:42:54,238 Τhere's plenty of room. 238 00:42:54,948 --> 00:42:57,157 Stay as long as you like. 239 00:42:58,451 --> 00:43:01,078 l'd just shoved this rifle into my mouth... 240 00:43:01,996 --> 00:43:06,250 when l heard the car, and l waited... 241 00:43:07,168 --> 00:43:09,127 hoping it would stop. 242 00:43:11,547 --> 00:43:13,632 l live here all alone. 243 00:43:13,925 --> 00:43:17,427 My wife hanged herself three months ago. 244 00:43:18,596 --> 00:43:21,765 Τhat's why the house is such a mess. 245 00:43:22,225 --> 00:43:25,811 l was going to redecorate, change everything. 246 00:43:30,525 --> 00:43:33,068 She often wished for a machine 247 00:43:33,361 --> 00:43:36,780 to stretch all the tendons of her body. 248 00:43:38,616 --> 00:43:40,450 l couldn't help her. 249 00:43:43,705 --> 00:43:46,456 ln the end l even started praying. 250 00:43:48,793 --> 00:43:51,253 l've been alone long enough. 251 00:43:51,379 --> 00:43:55,007 l feel like reading the papers again. 252 00:43:56,301 --> 00:43:58,260 Come in the other room. 253 00:44:36,424 --> 00:44:39,051 l'd like to talk about loneliness. 254 00:44:40,511 --> 00:44:43,472 l don't believe it even exists. 255 00:44:45,141 --> 00:44:50,562 lt's more of an artificial feeling induced from outside. 256 00:44:52,231 --> 00:44:53,690 Once... 257 00:44:54,067 --> 00:44:58,403 l sat in this room in a profound stupor. 258 00:44:58,988 --> 00:45:02,866 Cigarette stubs from the night before 259 00:45:02,992 --> 00:45:05,077 lay in the ashtray. 260 00:45:05,536 --> 00:45:08,705 "So l must have sat there last night 261 00:45:09,207 --> 00:45:12,209 as stupidly as today," l thought. 262 00:45:14,253 --> 00:45:17,547 "Yesterday l sat there, today here." 263 00:45:18,257 --> 00:45:20,675 And this vision of myself 264 00:45:20,802 --> 00:45:23,053 moved me so much 265 00:45:23,221 --> 00:45:26,515 that l felt caressed all of a sudden. 266 00:45:27,433 --> 00:45:29,768 Τhat, then, was loneliness. 267 00:45:30,561 --> 00:45:33,021 l was proud with loneliness, 268 00:45:33,231 --> 00:45:35,148 enthused by it. 269 00:45:36,025 --> 00:45:38,318 Drenched in loneliness. 270 00:45:42,115 --> 00:45:46,535 l produced a similar loneliness one night 271 00:45:46,994 --> 00:45:49,496 sitting outside on the terrace. 272 00:45:50,498 --> 00:45:52,749 l drank a bottle of wine, 273 00:45:53,084 --> 00:45:56,711 and time passed effortlessly. 274 00:45:59,424 --> 00:46:03,385 People were passing by in the distance... 275 00:46:04,095 --> 00:46:06,346 and looked across at me. 276 00:46:07,807 --> 00:46:11,226 "How lonely l must seem to them," l thought. 277 00:46:12,353 --> 00:46:14,896 At once l was again cradled 278 00:46:15,022 --> 00:46:18,650 in an artificial, manipulated loneliness. 279 00:46:19,610 --> 00:46:22,070 lt's just a theatrical state... 280 00:46:23,156 --> 00:46:25,532 that arises at the moment 281 00:46:25,867 --> 00:46:31,121 when you see yourself as an actor of your own self. 282 00:46:31,247 --> 00:46:32,622 And yet... 283 00:46:32,957 --> 00:46:37,836 it's these moments of hypocritical loneliness 284 00:46:38,546 --> 00:46:40,881 that make me feel reborn. 285 00:46:42,008 --> 00:46:44,676 Τhat's the paradox of loneliness: 286 00:46:46,095 --> 00:46:48,930 that overwhelming feeling... 287 00:46:49,640 --> 00:46:51,558 of security... 288 00:46:52,477 --> 00:46:54,561 that l then experience. 289 00:47:11,037 --> 00:47:14,372 You were going to reveal your secret to us. 290 00:47:15,541 --> 00:47:17,334 l'm too tired. 291 00:47:17,710 --> 00:47:20,921 Let's put it off till tomorrow when we go for a walk. 292 00:47:21,380 --> 00:47:23,340 Come, Mignon. 293 00:47:30,806 --> 00:47:32,766 She's called Mignon? 294 00:47:33,684 --> 00:47:36,853 l never knew that. - You never asked her. 295 00:47:37,605 --> 00:47:40,982 She's been waiting all this time for you to ask. 296 00:47:52,036 --> 00:47:53,620 Wilhelm. 297 00:47:56,916 --> 00:47:59,084 l'm going upstairs now. 298 00:47:59,961 --> 00:48:01,711 Will you be coming? 299 00:48:01,879 --> 00:48:04,214 Yes, you know l will. 300 00:48:04,882 --> 00:48:07,217 l'll stay down here for a while. 301 00:48:08,219 --> 00:48:11,680 l'm disgruntled because l've written nothing today. 302 00:48:14,308 --> 00:48:16,560 He's done with his poetry. 303 00:48:19,063 --> 00:48:22,357 But l don't want to remain unsatisfied. 304 00:48:25,069 --> 00:48:26,736 Look in on me. 305 00:48:27,071 --> 00:48:28,822 And l'm glad... 306 00:48:32,076 --> 00:48:34,661 l found you people. 307 00:48:46,257 --> 00:48:47,757 Good night. 308 00:49:33,554 --> 00:49:35,805 A self-portrait of my wife. 309 00:49:38,976 --> 00:49:41,394 l'd just like to talk a bit 310 00:49:41,812 --> 00:49:46,191 about loneliness here in Germany. 311 00:49:48,069 --> 00:49:51,321 l think it's more hidden 312 00:49:51,489 --> 00:49:53,281 and at the same time 313 00:49:53,741 --> 00:49:56,242 more painful than elsewhere. 314 00:49:58,287 --> 00:50:02,624 What's responsible for it could be the history of ideas here. 315 00:50:03,834 --> 00:50:08,505 Τhey were all seeking a way of life 316 00:50:08,964 --> 00:50:11,925 that could help overcome fear. 317 00:50:13,886 --> 00:50:16,179 Τhe propagation of virtues 318 00:50:16,347 --> 00:50:19,516 like courage, endurance, and diligence 319 00:50:19,684 --> 00:50:22,185 was only meant to distract from fear. 320 00:50:23,521 --> 00:50:26,940 Let's say it was that way. 321 00:50:28,192 --> 00:50:32,821 Philosophy could be used, more than anywhere else, 322 00:50:32,947 --> 00:50:35,240 as an ideology of the state... 323 00:50:36,367 --> 00:50:40,120 so that the necessarily criminal methods 324 00:50:40,246 --> 00:50:42,789 for overcoming fear 325 00:50:43,499 --> 00:50:45,667 could even be legalized. 326 00:50:47,044 --> 00:50:50,463 Fear is considered vain... 327 00:50:51,424 --> 00:50:53,550 and shameful. 328 00:50:56,637 --> 00:51:00,014 Τhat's why loneliness in Germany 329 00:51:00,516 --> 00:51:04,728 is masked by all those treacherously lifeless faces... 330 00:51:05,646 --> 00:51:10,358 that haunt supermarkets, recreational areas, 331 00:51:10,693 --> 00:51:14,070 pedestrian zones, and fitness centers. 332 00:51:15,698 --> 00:51:20,368 Τhe dead souls of Germany. 333 00:51:21,662 --> 00:51:26,207 "A boy knows no fear," my parents told me. 334 00:51:27,084 --> 00:51:30,295 l refuse to overcome my fear. 335 00:51:38,012 --> 00:51:41,723 l hope you'll like it here. 336 00:51:42,516 --> 00:51:47,437 lt was touching to see the way you listened to me. 337 00:52:24,099 --> 00:52:28,228 Maybe that exists: wanting to write without knowing what. 338 00:52:28,437 --> 00:52:31,356 Just like wanting to walk. 339 00:52:31,524 --> 00:52:35,902 Yes, not writing itseIf, but wanting to write is the need. 340 00:52:36,362 --> 00:52:39,823 Not loving, but wanting to love. 341 00:52:41,116 --> 00:52:43,034 l'm going upstairs. 342 00:55:05,010 --> 00:55:06,886 Are you there? 343 00:57:21,772 --> 00:57:24,107 l dreamed l was ice-skating. 344 00:57:31,115 --> 00:57:33,574 On a frozen sea. 345 00:57:36,286 --> 00:57:38,621 lt was the North Sea. 346 00:57:43,377 --> 00:57:45,628 l was quite far out. 347 00:57:49,341 --> 00:57:52,135 l couldn't get back... 348 00:57:53,303 --> 00:57:58,766 and l kept skating straight ahead. 349 00:58:00,811 --> 00:58:02,728 l was very afraid. 350 00:58:04,815 --> 00:58:10,153 Τhe worst was the grating of the ice skates... 351 00:58:12,156 --> 00:58:14,282 behind me on the ice. 352 00:58:18,745 --> 00:58:24,458 "Τhis isn't my dream at all," l kept thinking all the time. 353 00:58:39,391 --> 00:58:41,517 l dreamed you had to die. 354 00:58:45,606 --> 00:58:48,524 As a precaution you were supposed to go... 355 00:58:48,692 --> 00:58:52,403 to a mausoleum a few hours earlier 356 00:58:52,905 --> 00:58:55,531 below the main street. 357 00:58:57,701 --> 00:59:01,454 A child was to keep you company till you died. 358 00:59:03,373 --> 00:59:06,209 Τhe child stood next to you... 359 00:59:07,211 --> 00:59:12,048 and the mausoleum was sealed with a large stone. 360 00:59:15,385 --> 00:59:18,304 l dreamed of the absolute darkness... 361 00:59:20,599 --> 00:59:23,726 in which the child, till you died... 362 00:59:25,312 --> 00:59:27,313 had to stand next to you. 363 00:59:31,401 --> 00:59:33,402 lt was my child. 364 00:59:35,906 --> 00:59:39,742 l dreamed l lay on the bed in my room... 365 00:59:41,495 --> 00:59:45,414 seeing the whole time the wall with the door. 366 00:59:47,417 --> 00:59:49,585 l kept waking up... 367 00:59:50,295 --> 00:59:54,799 and really seeing the wall with the door in front of me. 368 00:59:56,426 --> 00:59:58,594 As soon as l fell asleep... 369 00:59:59,471 --> 01:00:01,555 l'd dream of it again, 370 01:00:01,682 --> 01:00:06,602 almost exactly the way l'd just seen it in reality. 371 01:00:08,939 --> 01:00:10,648 Except it was... 372 01:00:11,441 --> 01:00:13,442 closer to me. 373 01:00:16,446 --> 01:00:18,948 l had to vomit. 374 01:00:31,545 --> 01:00:33,296 l'm sorry. 375 01:00:34,006 --> 01:00:37,466 Now in daylight l can't remember my dream. 376 01:00:38,260 --> 01:00:42,138 Τhough right now, when l reached for the sugar bowl, 377 01:00:42,597 --> 01:00:46,475 it gave me a start. l almost remembered. 378 01:00:48,729 --> 01:00:51,147 lt seems so significant. 379 01:00:54,818 --> 01:00:56,485 And you, Mignon? 380 01:01:01,450 --> 01:01:03,701 She thinks dreams are ridiculous. 381 01:01:43,367 --> 01:01:47,370 A man screams at me in a fury 382 01:01:47,871 --> 01:01:51,415 "RosenthaI! I've got you now!" 383 01:01:53,001 --> 01:01:56,545 He grabs me by the collar 384 01:01:56,880 --> 01:02:00,091 And bashes four of my teeth in 385 01:02:00,300 --> 01:02:03,552 Then that man spits in my face 386 01:02:04,012 --> 01:02:07,056 I think to myseIf, "Who cares?" 387 01:02:07,307 --> 01:02:10,393 My name's not even RosenthaI 388 01:02:11,019 --> 01:02:13,896 That's none of my business 389 01:02:15,190 --> 01:02:19,360 When it's my turn to die one day 390 01:02:19,486 --> 01:02:22,780 I'II enter the coffin cheerfuIIy 391 01:02:23,490 --> 01:02:26,242 And because I have so many friends 392 01:02:27,035 --> 01:02:29,912 I'II Iie there upside down 393 01:02:31,373 --> 01:02:34,166 I'II Iie on my beIIy quietIy 394 01:02:35,377 --> 01:02:38,504 And think whatever I Iike 395 01:02:39,589 --> 01:02:42,675 Maybe someone wiII come visit me 396 01:02:43,635 --> 01:02:47,221 But that's none of my business 397 01:03:15,167 --> 01:03:19,295 Can a person write if he's alienated from politics? 398 01:03:21,673 --> 01:03:25,759 lf you could describe how the alienation came about. 399 01:03:26,261 --> 01:03:29,054 lt only shouldn't appear natural. 400 01:03:29,514 --> 01:03:32,975 Then l'll have to tell the history of the Western world. 401 01:03:33,143 --> 01:03:34,643 Of course. 402 01:03:40,108 --> 01:03:45,738 ln a way, politics only escaped me when l started writing. 403 01:03:46,865 --> 01:03:51,243 l tried to write politically but realized l didn't have the words for it. 404 01:03:51,411 --> 01:03:55,164 The words that existed had nothing to do with me. 405 01:03:55,290 --> 01:03:59,460 l felt nothing and thought, "l didn't write that!" 406 01:04:01,296 --> 01:04:04,465 l wrote as progressive politicians speak. 407 01:04:04,591 --> 01:04:06,133 Only... 408 01:04:06,259 --> 01:04:08,385 more helpless, as l didn't act, 409 01:04:08,595 --> 01:04:12,973 and more pointed, out of helplessness. 410 01:04:13,099 --> 01:04:16,852 A good reason to become politically active... 411 01:04:17,938 --> 01:04:19,980 and drop writing altogether. 412 01:04:20,106 --> 01:04:23,317 But it was through writing that l realized 413 01:04:23,735 --> 01:04:27,071 l couldn't formulate my needs politically. 414 01:04:27,864 --> 01:04:31,825 Politicians never aroused them, only poets. 415 01:04:35,038 --> 01:04:39,875 What does the world care about your personal needs? 416 01:04:41,378 --> 01:04:44,171 Everybody has highly personal needs. 417 01:04:44,297 --> 01:04:47,800 For me, they're the only real needs. 418 01:04:48,843 --> 01:04:51,053 But they're unfulfillable... 419 01:04:52,138 --> 01:04:56,433 compared with those needs that politics deals with. 420 01:05:04,901 --> 01:05:06,485 lf only - 421 01:05:07,654 --> 01:05:10,573 lf only politics and poetry... 422 01:05:11,366 --> 01:05:13,409 could be united. 423 01:05:16,663 --> 01:05:19,206 Τhat would mean the end of longing, 424 01:05:19,332 --> 01:05:21,709 and the end of the world. 425 01:05:31,595 --> 01:05:35,681 Last night l saw you lying on the floor by your bed 426 01:05:35,807 --> 01:05:39,643 with a sort of whip in your hand. 427 01:05:40,645 --> 01:05:42,938 What are you atoning for? 428 01:05:47,193 --> 01:05:49,528 lt's time for your story. 429 01:05:55,327 --> 01:06:00,623 Earlier, on the terrace, l sang a Jew's song. 430 01:06:02,751 --> 01:06:04,710 Your friend's? 431 01:06:04,836 --> 01:06:06,754 l killed him. 432 01:06:09,633 --> 01:06:13,385 Remember the salute the train conductor gave 433 01:06:13,511 --> 01:06:16,263 when he left me on the train? 434 01:06:18,391 --> 01:06:20,601 He was my adjutant in Vilna. 435 01:06:23,104 --> 01:06:27,608 l saved some Jews too, if they were professionally qualified. 436 01:06:38,078 --> 01:06:39,828 Can you swim? 437 01:06:40,497 --> 01:06:42,915 How do you know l can't? 438 01:06:44,501 --> 01:06:46,627 l was hoping so. 439 01:06:53,677 --> 01:06:57,971 Walking like this, l feel l could cover miles in a single step. 440 01:06:59,766 --> 01:07:03,352 Then l even understand your distaste for politics, Wilhelm. 441 01:07:07,857 --> 01:07:11,777 For me, nature is of vital importance. 442 01:07:17,367 --> 01:07:20,119 lt makes me forget the entire past. 443 01:07:22,330 --> 01:07:24,873 Τhose innocent campfires of my youth. 444 01:07:25,917 --> 01:07:29,878 We cast sticks to foretell the future. 445 01:07:31,005 --> 01:07:34,800 We leaped through the fire laughing, without a care. 446 01:07:36,511 --> 01:07:40,848 We still rejoiced over the potatoes we baked in the campfire... 447 01:07:42,684 --> 01:07:45,018 whereas the spoiled kids of today 448 01:07:45,395 --> 01:07:49,273 think it's a big adventure to barbecue a suckling pig 449 01:07:49,399 --> 01:07:52,067 in their parents' gardens. 450 01:09:05,475 --> 01:09:08,560 l'm still trying to remember my dream. 451 01:09:12,148 --> 01:09:15,150 l know it has something to do with my uncle. 452 01:09:21,533 --> 01:09:25,202 A short poem just came to mind. 453 01:09:26,746 --> 01:09:28,497 A sort of haiku. 454 01:09:29,958 --> 01:09:33,669 ln writing, observation is better than inspiration. 455 01:09:33,837 --> 01:09:36,255 Do you want to hear it or not? 456 01:09:36,881 --> 01:09:39,341 l just thought of a story. 457 01:09:40,218 --> 01:09:41,927 Τell me. 458 01:09:43,346 --> 01:09:45,430 You say your poem first. 459 01:09:46,975 --> 01:09:48,976 lt's called "Lovingly." 460 01:09:52,730 --> 01:09:54,606 "Lovingly. 461 01:09:56,109 --> 01:09:57,818 Lovingly 462 01:09:58,194 --> 01:10:00,028 the mother watches 463 01:10:00,321 --> 01:10:02,865 her children eat." 464 01:10:05,118 --> 01:10:07,452 A poem by Bernhard Landau. 465 01:10:08,788 --> 01:10:10,372 Very good. 466 01:10:12,876 --> 01:10:16,545 My story is also quite short. lt goes something like this: 467 01:10:18,548 --> 01:10:21,884 "He finally got around to saying he loved her. 468 01:10:22,552 --> 01:10:25,429 At the moment he said, 'l love you,' 469 01:10:25,889 --> 01:10:30,350 she happened to use a toothpick. He hated her forever from then on." 470 01:10:30,518 --> 01:10:32,519 Did he marry her, then? 471 01:10:32,645 --> 01:10:35,856 Of course, once he said he loved her. 472 01:10:37,233 --> 01:10:40,569 You must bring that in to round the story off. 473 01:10:41,863 --> 01:10:44,072 Otherwise it's just a punch line. 474 01:10:44,532 --> 01:10:47,367 Also, l'd give them both names. 475 01:10:48,244 --> 01:10:50,537 "He" and "she"... 476 01:10:51,915 --> 01:10:54,416 are just figures from a joke. 477 01:10:54,584 --> 01:10:57,836 - What should l call them? - Anton and Martha. 478 01:11:01,424 --> 01:11:05,886 "Anton was finally able to tell Martha that he loved her." 479 01:11:07,263 --> 01:11:09,306 lt's turning into a novel. 480 01:11:54,811 --> 01:11:57,312 You didn't look for me. 481 01:11:58,314 --> 01:12:00,691 Yes, l did look for you. 482 01:12:05,863 --> 01:12:07,823 Your face is so soft. 483 01:12:08,992 --> 01:12:11,076 Τhat's how sad you are. 484 01:12:12,328 --> 01:12:13,787 Yes. 485 01:12:14,831 --> 01:12:17,165 Don't say what you're thinking. 486 01:12:19,168 --> 01:12:21,670 You had so much to tell. 487 01:12:29,554 --> 01:12:32,180 l want to be alone with you today. 488 01:12:32,515 --> 01:12:36,309 l'm not afraid anymore, the way l usually am. 489 01:12:37,895 --> 01:12:41,773 l made up that dream about skating. 490 01:12:43,026 --> 01:12:45,152 l just felt that way. 491 01:12:45,278 --> 01:12:50,365 l realized that and looked away while you were telling it. 492 01:12:52,535 --> 01:12:55,829 Did you see those feathers on the path? 493 01:12:56,205 --> 01:12:58,623 Yes. Why? 494 01:12:59,042 --> 01:13:01,168 Did you notice anything? 495 01:13:01,878 --> 01:13:03,920 l didn't look properly. 496 01:13:04,380 --> 01:13:06,882 A yellow beak was underneath. 497 01:13:09,510 --> 01:13:12,429 Τhere's a lot you don't notice. 498 01:13:14,015 --> 01:13:15,640 Τrue. 499 01:13:16,017 --> 01:13:18,727 l have to make a conscious effort to observe. 500 01:13:18,895 --> 01:13:22,189 Everyone else notices more details than me. 501 01:13:24,233 --> 01:13:27,527 Yet you want to live as a writer? 502 01:13:28,112 --> 01:13:32,157 l know l haven't got the so-called power of observation. 503 01:13:33,242 --> 01:13:35,243 But l believe l have... 504 01:13:37,288 --> 01:13:40,373 the gift of a sort of erotic view. 505 01:13:41,084 --> 01:13:43,919 Suddenly l notice something that l've always missed, 506 01:13:44,087 --> 01:13:48,590 and not only do l see it, but l get a feeling for it. 507 01:13:48,966 --> 01:13:51,676 Τhat's what l call an erotic view. 508 01:13:52,428 --> 01:13:55,680 l then write not just an observation 509 01:13:55,848 --> 01:13:58,809 but an experience. 510 01:13:59,977 --> 01:14:03,563 Τhat's why l insist on being a writer. 511 01:14:48,276 --> 01:14:50,652 Something has to happen. 512 01:14:53,364 --> 01:14:55,782 lt's all so matter-of-fact. 513 01:14:57,160 --> 01:14:59,327 Finished. Closed up. 514 01:15:03,499 --> 01:15:06,042 l don't want to walk anymore. 515 01:15:07,378 --> 01:15:10,088 lt feels like we're putting things off. 516 01:15:10,214 --> 01:15:12,174 Let's do something. 517 01:15:27,398 --> 01:15:29,941 Have you ever wanted to kill someone? 518 01:15:30,067 --> 01:15:31,568 No. 519 01:15:34,739 --> 01:15:36,281 l have. 520 01:15:38,034 --> 01:15:41,328 As a child l had a real bloodlust. 521 01:15:43,581 --> 01:15:46,208 l've got it again right now. 522 01:15:48,127 --> 01:15:51,046 l wouldn't even use a weapon. 523 01:15:51,339 --> 01:15:53,882 Just my bare hands. 524 01:15:56,552 --> 01:15:58,511 What do you mean? 525 01:16:01,390 --> 01:16:03,391 l know who you mean. 526 01:16:08,522 --> 01:16:10,732 l just remembered my dream. 527 01:16:11,484 --> 01:16:14,736 Our host ran along a coast road. 528 01:16:14,862 --> 01:16:18,573 A man with a camera pursued him. Our host shouted.. 529 01:16:18,824 --> 01:16:22,369 "Long live the world's exploited masses." 530 01:16:23,371 --> 01:16:27,582 Τhen he leapt over the railing and plunged below. 531 01:16:28,876 --> 01:16:30,877 Far below was the sea. 532 01:16:31,003 --> 01:16:34,005 l had to look at the film as a witness... - Let's go. 533 01:16:34,131 --> 01:16:36,383 Let's go. l'm scared. 534 01:16:38,427 --> 01:16:40,971 The cameraman who filmed the plunge - 535 01:19:08,285 --> 01:19:11,079 At times I stared into space 536 01:19:11,372 --> 01:19:13,748 without looking at anything. 537 01:19:15,000 --> 01:19:17,001 Then I shut my eyes, 538 01:19:17,586 --> 01:19:21,089 and onIy by the afterimage I reaIized 539 01:19:21,215 --> 01:19:23,591 what had been in front of me. 540 01:19:24,009 --> 01:19:28,430 When l'm writing, l shut my eyes and see things clearly 541 01:19:28,556 --> 01:19:31,433 that I wouIdn't notice with my eyes open. 542 01:20:25,029 --> 01:20:28,948 After the suicide of the industriaIist whose presence had so stimuIated me, 543 01:20:29,074 --> 01:20:31,618 it seemed we had aII Iost direction. 544 01:20:31,827 --> 01:20:34,829 The journey through Germany I had so far experienced 545 01:20:34,955 --> 01:20:38,333 as an adventure and work was interrupted, 546 01:20:38,459 --> 01:20:42,003 and we moved on in a stupid panic. 547 01:20:42,296 --> 01:20:47,634 Bernhard disappeared without expIanation at the service area. 548 01:20:48,093 --> 01:20:52,430 The rest of us stayed together, but we too were moving apart. 549 01:20:59,480 --> 01:21:03,650 Can you still run as fast as you did at the Olympics? 550 01:21:49,238 --> 01:21:52,282 ln the evening we reached the Taunus foothills, 551 01:21:52,408 --> 01:21:56,452 where Therese had an apartment on the tenth fIoor. 552 01:21:57,955 --> 01:22:00,081 Feces Iay in the Iobby, 553 01:22:00,207 --> 01:22:04,752 and the woodwork of the eIevator was carved with genital symbols. 554 01:22:04,920 --> 01:22:08,506 Therese said she'd onIy just moved in. 555 01:22:08,632 --> 01:22:11,342 Her apartment waIIs were still roughcast. 556 01:22:11,635 --> 01:22:14,679 In the distance you saw the Frankfurt skyIine. 557 01:22:14,805 --> 01:22:16,806 I wanted to sIeep with her, 558 01:22:16,974 --> 01:22:20,893 but maybe it was just an urge to get a grip on things. 559 01:22:21,020 --> 01:22:24,314 I feIt an aimIess rage directed at the old man, 560 01:22:24,607 --> 01:22:27,233 using his past as an excuse to myseIf. 561 01:23:17,326 --> 01:23:19,452 She's not a child anymore. 562 01:23:20,663 --> 01:23:22,330 l know. 563 01:23:23,874 --> 01:23:25,416 What? 564 01:23:26,043 --> 01:23:28,002 What do you know? 565 01:23:29,338 --> 01:23:32,131 Everything. l could tell at once. 566 01:23:34,677 --> 01:23:36,552 Never mind. 567 01:23:40,808 --> 01:23:42,767 l envy you, Wilhelm. 568 01:23:48,023 --> 01:23:49,607 Me? 569 01:23:51,068 --> 01:23:54,821 You don't worry about anything, at least usually. 570 01:24:03,831 --> 01:24:06,082 l know it embarrasses you... 571 01:24:07,292 --> 01:24:10,002 but l can't help liking you a lot. 572 01:24:12,423 --> 01:24:13,923 Why? 573 01:24:16,885 --> 01:24:18,511 Sorry. 574 01:24:26,103 --> 01:24:28,396 You know what l think is funny? 575 01:24:30,607 --> 01:24:34,235 Τhat just now your stubble was scratching me... 576 01:24:36,405 --> 01:24:40,366 and you were panting on my shoulder, your mouth wide open. 577 01:24:42,578 --> 01:24:45,747 And now you're making that serious face. 578 01:24:50,627 --> 01:24:52,420 Your ridi- 579 01:24:53,172 --> 01:24:56,591 Your detached pose is quite ridiculous. 580 01:25:09,188 --> 01:25:12,607 Instead of becoming desperate, l just got more dull. 581 01:25:12,733 --> 01:25:16,277 So I onIy stared stupidIy at those who were reaIIy desperate. 582 01:25:16,612 --> 01:25:19,155 Yet I moved through the cement landscape 583 01:25:19,281 --> 01:25:22,366 like one who cared, the hero. 584 01:25:36,632 --> 01:25:39,050 I have to pay 20 marks on top? 585 01:25:39,176 --> 01:25:41,135 Out of the question! 586 01:25:41,470 --> 01:25:44,764 We don't have any money with us either. 587 01:25:45,474 --> 01:25:49,060 All this homework! l'm sick of it. 588 01:25:49,186 --> 01:25:51,729 Math and all the other stuff... 589 01:26:00,656 --> 01:26:03,991 l couldn't grasp how all these people in the supermarkets, 590 01:26:04,201 --> 01:26:07,161 on the playgrounds, behind the windows of the high-rises, 591 01:26:07,329 --> 01:26:09,664 in this country, and not onIy here, 592 01:26:10,123 --> 01:26:12,166 put up with Iife. 593 01:27:55,270 --> 01:27:57,396 Are you learning set theory too? 594 01:27:57,522 --> 01:27:59,273 lt's so boring! 595 01:27:59,900 --> 01:28:03,778 Quantity A plus quantity B equals quantity C. 596 01:28:04,363 --> 01:28:06,781 l have a friend on the third floor. 597 01:28:07,074 --> 01:28:09,075 Mine's on the eighth. 598 01:28:09,201 --> 01:28:12,828 l used to have one in the penthouse. 599 01:29:27,362 --> 01:29:30,531 l have this feeling of total absurdity. 600 01:29:35,120 --> 01:29:39,623 No sooner do l try to learn a line in this play here... 601 01:29:41,293 --> 01:29:43,711 than l see this matchbox... 602 01:29:44,796 --> 01:29:48,966 and wonder why it doesn't appear in the play. 603 01:29:50,719 --> 01:29:52,636 lt's so artificial... 604 01:29:53,388 --> 01:29:57,600 expressing yourself with other people's words. 605 01:29:57,726 --> 01:30:00,227 Only by remembering for a long time... 606 01:30:01,271 --> 01:30:04,106 does a text sometimes make sense. 607 01:30:06,443 --> 01:30:08,527 Because l remember... 608 01:30:10,155 --> 01:30:12,573 having experienced something similar. 609 01:30:14,159 --> 01:30:16,285 l had just forgotten. 610 01:30:16,411 --> 01:30:18,913 lf l remember, l can act 611 01:30:19,081 --> 01:30:22,041 without that suffocating feeling 612 01:30:22,751 --> 01:30:25,961 of not understanding my actions. 613 01:30:29,424 --> 01:30:33,594 After this memory work, l enjoy being onstage, 614 01:30:34,262 --> 01:30:36,430 and l'm happy doing it. 615 01:30:36,723 --> 01:30:39,225 But if l don't manage to remember, 616 01:30:39,351 --> 01:30:41,602 l act like a machine. 617 01:30:46,233 --> 01:30:50,736 ln the last show l suddenly got stuck... 618 01:30:52,239 --> 01:30:55,783 even though l knew the text entirely by heart... 619 01:30:57,452 --> 01:31:00,121 and the prompter whispered it. 620 01:31:03,291 --> 01:31:06,377 Being a parrot is humiliating... 621 01:31:07,629 --> 01:31:09,672 l've always thought. 622 01:31:10,632 --> 01:31:12,466 Are you listening? 623 01:31:12,968 --> 01:31:15,803 Being a parrot is humiliating. 624 01:31:27,065 --> 01:31:29,525 Help me, Wilhelm, or leave. 625 01:31:32,320 --> 01:31:35,906 lt disgusts me that everything leaves you cold. 626 01:31:36,658 --> 01:31:39,034 Yesterday you envied me for it. 627 01:31:45,834 --> 01:31:48,335 But today it makes me sick. 628 01:31:50,297 --> 01:31:52,423 l could - 629 01:31:52,924 --> 01:31:54,508 Kill me. 630 01:31:55,468 --> 01:31:57,344 Go ahead. 631 01:31:58,054 --> 01:32:00,472 Maybe l can learn something from you. 632 01:32:02,267 --> 01:32:04,643 Beat me to death. 633 01:32:42,849 --> 01:32:44,558 You disrupt... 634 01:32:45,769 --> 01:32:47,478 my writing. 635 01:33:00,075 --> 01:33:03,577 You talk about yourself and your troubles at work, 636 01:33:03,745 --> 01:33:06,121 not realizing l'm actually working. 637 01:33:06,748 --> 01:33:10,668 Τhen l'm like you and your matchbox that isn't in the text. 638 01:33:10,794 --> 01:33:14,129 And l can't go on writing, because l feel... 639 01:33:18,969 --> 01:33:23,389 what you've just said should appear in my writing. 640 01:33:24,557 --> 01:33:25,933 So... 641 01:33:26,768 --> 01:33:28,435 leave me in peace. 642 01:33:29,521 --> 01:33:31,230 You weren't even listening. 643 01:33:31,356 --> 01:33:32,606 l was... 644 01:33:33,191 --> 01:33:36,735 but l kept thinking l was missing out on my writing. 645 01:33:41,533 --> 01:33:43,450 You're a pig! 646 01:33:54,296 --> 01:33:57,506 Don't say that, Τherese. 647 01:34:09,561 --> 01:34:11,312 Say something. 648 01:34:12,439 --> 01:34:14,648 You look revolting when you're silent. 649 01:34:18,611 --> 01:34:20,738 What are you writing? 650 01:34:23,783 --> 01:34:28,037 l'm writing a story about someone who is a kind man... 651 01:34:29,331 --> 01:34:33,042 but also incapable of any pity. 652 01:34:33,626 --> 01:34:37,963 l want to prove that compassion and pitilessness go together. 653 01:34:39,174 --> 01:34:41,342 l think it'll become a political story. 654 01:34:42,969 --> 01:34:46,013 Where can you go boating around here? 655 01:34:48,099 --> 01:34:50,392 On the Main. 656 01:34:50,518 --> 01:34:52,853 ln that case, we'll go boating tomorrow 657 01:34:53,021 --> 01:34:55,230 and take the old man. 658 01:34:55,440 --> 01:34:57,107 We'll leave Mignon here. 659 01:34:58,109 --> 01:35:01,195 She'll have to get used to being alone. 660 01:35:05,200 --> 01:35:07,242 He committed suicide. 661 01:35:08,203 --> 01:35:13,415 He hanged himseIf in the room behind the pastor's apartment. 662 01:35:13,541 --> 01:35:15,501 It was a terribIe end. 663 01:35:17,045 --> 01:35:19,630 I was unabIe to heIp Therese. 664 01:35:19,798 --> 01:35:21,965 My work was mereIy a pretext, 665 01:35:22,092 --> 01:35:24,885 knowing too well it couIdn't reaIIy be caIIed work 666 01:35:25,011 --> 01:35:28,430 if I wasn't open for Therese at the same time. 667 01:35:28,598 --> 01:35:32,059 I had onIy showed off to her. 668 01:35:35,397 --> 01:35:37,398 Are we rowing here? 669 01:35:46,074 --> 01:35:47,950 Wilhelm! 670 01:35:49,744 --> 01:35:52,162 l've changed a lot since then. 671 01:35:55,166 --> 01:35:58,252 lt's not just that l sleep on the bare floor. 672 01:35:58,378 --> 01:36:00,754 l have back pain anyway. 673 01:36:02,715 --> 01:36:04,925 Τimes were different then. 674 01:36:07,470 --> 01:36:09,596 You must understand that. 675 01:36:21,443 --> 01:36:26,738 We differentiated, like you now, between the natural and politics. 676 01:36:27,407 --> 01:36:30,617 Defending the natural against politics 677 01:36:30,952 --> 01:36:33,328 led to the most atrocious politics. 678 01:36:48,136 --> 01:36:49,970 You really can't swim? 679 01:36:50,138 --> 01:36:51,638 Wilhelm. 680 01:36:52,974 --> 01:36:55,142 Please, Wilhelm! 681 01:36:57,312 --> 01:37:00,981 Let me live, Wilhelm! 682 01:37:01,483 --> 01:37:04,860 l know you want to move on. Τake me with you. 683 01:37:04,986 --> 01:37:06,987 l can imitate animals. 684 01:37:09,324 --> 01:37:12,451 And l'm a good cook! From halibut to liver dumplings. 685 01:37:12,994 --> 01:37:16,330 "Rosenthal! l've got you now!" 686 01:37:31,012 --> 01:37:34,640 Τhe water used to be pure and clear here, right? 687 01:38:16,266 --> 01:38:19,059 lt was different then, with the cat... 688 01:38:50,216 --> 01:38:52,092 When are you leaving? 689 01:38:52,927 --> 01:38:54,261 Τomorrow. 690 01:38:55,930 --> 01:38:57,931 How did you find out? 691 01:39:00,935 --> 01:39:03,895 You've been making slips recently. 692 01:39:05,607 --> 01:39:09,359 That made me realize your thoughts were elsewhere. 693 01:39:11,613 --> 01:39:13,530 Where will you go? 694 01:39:16,242 --> 01:39:20,037 l just saw a photo of the Zugspitze in the paper. 695 01:39:21,623 --> 01:39:23,624 l've never been there. 696 01:39:23,791 --> 01:39:26,460 Never been on a mountain as high as that. 697 01:39:27,086 --> 01:39:29,963 A rack railway is going up there. 698 01:39:35,136 --> 01:39:37,971 What if l ask you to stay? 699 01:39:58,034 --> 01:40:01,495 l know l shall love you very much one day... 700 01:40:01,663 --> 01:40:02,996 Τherese. 701 01:40:07,502 --> 01:40:09,169 Mignon... 702 01:40:09,295 --> 01:40:11,421 l'm leaving tomorrow. 703 01:40:12,090 --> 01:40:14,925 You must decide for yourself what to do. 704 01:40:15,134 --> 01:40:17,678 Your friend isn't going to show up anymore. 705 01:40:28,189 --> 01:40:30,273 So how do we part then? 706 01:40:31,442 --> 01:40:33,652 Somewhere in the crowd. 707 01:40:42,704 --> 01:40:45,330 Where is your crowd? 708 01:40:46,249 --> 01:40:48,375 l'm disappointed too. 709 01:40:48,876 --> 01:40:50,961 l thought it would be so busy 710 01:40:51,337 --> 01:40:54,673 that we couldn't even walk alongside each other. 711 01:40:56,300 --> 01:40:58,176 Shall we meet again? 712 01:40:59,053 --> 01:41:00,929 Necessarily. 713 01:41:25,246 --> 01:41:29,916 The parents who Ieft their chiId #37 in the nursery, 714 01:41:30,042 --> 01:41:33,420 pIease come and get it there. l repeat. 715 01:42:15,755 --> 01:42:18,548 I toId Therese I wanted to stay in Germany 716 01:42:18,674 --> 01:42:21,802 because I knew too IittIe to write about it. 717 01:42:22,178 --> 01:42:24,221 But that was onIy a pretext. 718 01:42:24,347 --> 01:42:29,142 In reaIity, I just wanted to be aIone to Iive in my stupor on my own. 719 01:42:29,602 --> 01:42:33,480 l stood on the Zugspitze waiting for an experience Iike a miracIe. 720 01:42:33,648 --> 01:42:35,857 But there was no snowstorm. 721 01:42:36,067 --> 01:42:40,111 Why had I run away? Why was I here and not with the others? 722 01:42:40,238 --> 01:42:44,241 Why did I threaten the oId man and not Iet him teII me more? 723 01:42:44,367 --> 01:42:46,535 I feIt I had missed out on something 724 01:42:47,036 --> 01:42:49,162 and continued to miss out 725 01:42:49,413 --> 01:42:52,749 with every new move. WRONG MOVE 53212

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