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1
00:01:34,823 --> 00:01:36,325
Dear Dr. Jones,
2
00:01:36,408 --> 00:01:40,412
I act on behalf of a client
with access to very substantial funds
3
00:01:40,495 --> 00:01:44,708
who has indicated a desire
to sponsor a project to introduce salmon
4
00:01:44,791 --> 00:01:48,253
and the sport of salmon fishing
into the Yemen.
5
00:01:48,462 --> 00:01:50,589
I would like to seek a meeting with you
to identify
6
00:01:50,672 --> 00:01:54,760
how this challenging project
might be initiated and resourced.
7
00:01:56,136 --> 00:01:58,430
I might add that
the Foreign and Commonwealth Office
8
00:01:58,513 --> 00:02:02,142
supports the project as a symbol
of Anglo-Yemeni cooperation.
9
00:02:03,644 --> 00:02:07,230
Yours sincerely,
Harriet Chetwode-Talbot, Ms.
10
00:02:07,314 --> 00:02:09,524
Fitzharris & Price Investment Consultants.
11
00:02:22,245 --> 00:02:23,497
Night. Have a good evening.
12
00:02:23,580 --> 00:02:26,583
You, too. Say hi to soldier boy.
13
00:02:26,667 --> 00:02:28,835
We're just friends, you know.
We've only met a couple of times.
14
00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:30,879
- Yeah, you tell me that on Monday.
- Shut up.
15
00:02:38,971 --> 00:02:41,264
- Hello.
- Hi. It's great to see you.
16
00:02:41,348 --> 00:02:43,809
- Yes. Me, too. Sorry.
- Yes?
17
00:02:43,892 --> 00:02:45,477
- Yes.
- You, too.
18
00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:47,896
- No, "Yes" is a start, that's fine.
- Stop it, I'm so nervous.
19
00:02:47,980 --> 00:02:49,106
Why are you nervous?
20
00:02:49,189 --> 00:02:51,858
I don't know. I'm trying to be
very sophisticated and grown-up.
21
00:02:51,942 --> 00:02:55,570
Right. No, grown-up, absolutely.
Quite right, yeah.
22
00:02:56,697 --> 00:02:58,198
- Harriet.
- Yes?
23
00:02:58,281 --> 00:02:59,783
Last one to the restaurant pays.
24
00:02:59,866 --> 00:03:00,951
What?
25
00:03:01,034 --> 00:03:02,995
You bastard.
26
00:03:04,037 --> 00:03:05,914
Dear Harriet Chetwode-Talbot,
27
00:03:07,499 --> 00:03:09,292
thank you for your e-mail.
28
00:03:09,876 --> 00:03:13,130
As a fisheries specialist,
permit me a word or two about salmon.
29
00:03:14,506 --> 00:03:19,970
Migratory salmonoids require cool,
well-oxygenated water in which to spawn.
30
00:03:21,096 --> 00:03:23,849
In addition, in the early stages
of the salmon's life cycle,
31
00:03:23,932 --> 00:03:28,311
a good supply of fly life
indigenous to the northern European rivers
32
00:03:28,395 --> 00:03:32,315
is necessary for the juvenile salmon,
or parr, to survive.
33
00:03:33,567 --> 00:03:35,861
Some considerable distance
from the Indian Ocean,
34
00:03:35,944 --> 00:03:38,613
or indeed the Red Sea,
as I am sure you are aware,
35
00:03:39,031 --> 00:03:42,451
though apparently not
the Foreign and Commonwealth Office.
36
00:03:43,326 --> 00:03:49,124
We conclude that conditions in the Yemen
make this project unfeasible.
37
00:03:49,624 --> 00:03:51,626
Fundamentally unfeasible.
38
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:57,007
Yes, yes. Fundamentally unfeasible.
39
00:03:57,883 --> 00:03:59,134
We therefore regret
40
00:03:59,217 --> 00:04:02,971
that we are unable to help you
any further in this matter.
41
00:04:03,513 --> 00:04:07,684
Yours, Alfred Jones, Doctor.
42
00:04:07,768 --> 00:04:10,103
I've put duck liver pate in your sandwich.
43
00:04:13,023 --> 00:04:14,483
That's lovely.
44
00:04:16,109 --> 00:04:18,236
Righto. I'm off to bed.
45
00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:19,654
Already?
46
00:04:20,614 --> 00:04:23,325
- Airport car's coming at 5:00.
- Righto.
47
00:04:24,826 --> 00:04:27,412
I'll maybe have another wee pass
at the caddis fly paper.
48
00:04:27,496 --> 00:04:29,414
You could read it on the airplane.
49
00:04:29,498 --> 00:04:32,459
Up to my ear in reports, darling.
I'll read it when I'm back.
50
00:04:33,502 --> 00:04:35,337
Right, then. Good night.
51
00:04:45,138 --> 00:04:47,766
Oh, my God, I don't do this.
I don't do this.
52
00:04:47,849 --> 00:04:49,684
No, I can tell.
53
00:04:50,185 --> 00:04:52,229
I haven't done this in a really long time.
54
00:04:52,312 --> 00:04:53,897
- Okay.
- I'm so shy.
55
00:04:53,980 --> 00:04:55,941
- Okay. No, I'll sleep on the sofa.
- No, I'm so shy.
56
00:04:56,024 --> 00:04:57,109
Look, Harriet, I mean it. I...
57
00:04:57,192 --> 00:04:58,610
Shut up.
58
00:05:00,362 --> 00:05:02,405
You were saying. You're shy.
59
00:05:02,864 --> 00:05:06,159
I am shy and quiet.
60
00:05:06,243 --> 00:05:07,953
Like Hitler. I'm serious.
61
00:05:08,870 --> 00:05:10,455
Robert, I...
62
00:05:10,539 --> 00:05:12,249
Don't do this and then forget me.
63
00:05:12,332 --> 00:05:15,418
I just don't wanna be
an army barracks joke in the morning.
64
00:05:15,502 --> 00:05:16,545
Please be nice to me.
65
00:05:16,628 --> 00:05:19,381
Harriet, I'm serious, too. I mean it.
66
00:05:20,465 --> 00:05:22,008
So if you want me
to sleep on the sofa, then I'll...
67
00:05:22,092 --> 00:05:25,470
If you say, Captain Mayers,
one more time you'll sleep on the sofa,
68
00:05:25,554 --> 00:05:27,430
you'll bloody well sleep on the sofa.
69
00:05:27,514 --> 00:05:30,809
Captain Robert Mayers, 3-6-4-7-7-2.
70
00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:36,857
Maxwell. Better be good.
71
00:05:36,940 --> 00:05:38,525
Mrs. Maxwell, we have a situation.
72
00:05:38,608 --> 00:05:40,527
- What?
- Code Red in Afghanistan.
73
00:05:40,610 --> 00:05:42,070
Go to sleep.
74
00:05:44,114 --> 00:05:45,448
Tell me that's not a mosque.
75
00:05:45,532 --> 00:05:47,450
Well, it is a religious establishment...
76
00:05:47,534 --> 00:05:49,411
- Of course it's a bloody mosque!
- Well, of course...
77
00:05:49,494 --> 00:05:51,121
- What's up?
- Go to sleep.
78
00:05:51,204 --> 00:05:53,707
- ...make this a joint operation.
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
79
00:05:53,832 --> 00:05:56,418
The British have absolutely
nothing to do with this whatsoever.
80
00:05:56,501 --> 00:06:01,298
And I want every single man, woman, child
and goat in Afghanistan to know that.
81
00:06:01,423 --> 00:06:05,343
My God, I didn't think we could make
the war in Afghanistan any less popular,
82
00:06:05,427 --> 00:06:07,137
but, hey, even I can be wrong.
83
00:06:07,220 --> 00:06:10,432
We'll have Vera Lynn strapping on
her suicide belt in sympathy next.
84
00:06:10,932 --> 00:06:12,601
Bravo, the bloody Marines.
85
00:06:17,856 --> 00:06:18,940
Right, you lot.
86
00:06:19,191 --> 00:06:21,359
We need a good news story
from the Middle East, a big one.
87
00:06:21,443 --> 00:06:23,778
And we need it now.
You've got an hour, get on with it.
88
00:06:34,539 --> 00:06:36,041
Good news, eh?
89
00:06:36,917 --> 00:06:39,169
New girl band, Middle East tour.
90
00:06:39,628 --> 00:06:41,671
Maybe. Maybe.
91
00:06:41,755 --> 00:06:44,799
Touch my body No, no...
92
00:06:45,675 --> 00:06:47,219
Okay...
93
00:06:48,053 --> 00:06:49,971
Maybe not. No.
94
00:06:51,306 --> 00:06:54,684
British trans-Arabian rally.
95
00:06:56,144 --> 00:06:57,979
For God's sake.
96
00:06:59,022 --> 00:07:02,651
Come on, come on. Come up with something.
What's this?
97
00:07:03,401 --> 00:07:07,364
A project to introduce salmon fishing
to the Yemen.
98
00:07:08,490 --> 00:07:11,451
Salmon fishing.
Salmon fishing in the Yemen.
99
00:07:11,534 --> 00:07:14,537
Is that the best you puffed-up
Oxbridge-educated moronic buffoons
100
00:07:14,621 --> 00:07:16,414
can come up with?
101
00:07:17,082 --> 00:07:19,125
Yes? Yes, Prime Minister.
102
00:07:20,669 --> 00:07:22,087
Well, no, I'm working on it right now.
103
00:07:22,170 --> 00:07:26,174
I think I may have come up
with something that you'll like.
104
00:07:27,509 --> 00:07:29,261
Salmon fishing. Salmon fishing.
105
00:07:29,344 --> 00:07:31,388
Are you dollies trying to get me fired?
106
00:07:32,430 --> 00:07:34,432
Well, here we go.
107
00:07:35,433 --> 00:07:36,685
Fish it is.
108
00:07:46,611 --> 00:07:47,821
- Morning.
- Good morning.
109
00:07:48,738 --> 00:07:50,407
- Morning.
- Morning.
110
00:07:50,991 --> 00:07:52,033
- Morning.
- Hello.
111
00:08:05,338 --> 00:08:08,508
Mrs. Maxwell on line one, sir.
112
00:08:09,134 --> 00:08:10,427
Busy.
113
00:08:10,510 --> 00:08:12,178
She says it's urgent, sir.
114
00:08:13,221 --> 00:08:14,306
Maxwell who?
115
00:08:14,389 --> 00:08:16,599
The press officer to the
Prime Minister, sir.
116
00:08:18,518 --> 00:08:19,561
Patricia.
117
00:08:19,644 --> 00:08:21,313
They haven't pensioned you off yet, then?
118
00:08:21,396 --> 00:08:23,356
Listen, I got the heads-up
from the FCO about this
119
00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:26,109
salmon fishing in the Yemen. Fancy it?
120
00:08:27,569 --> 00:08:28,945
- Well, I...
- We do.
121
00:08:29,029 --> 00:08:31,072
Chasing a good news story
out of the Middle East.
122
00:08:31,156 --> 00:08:33,158
Anglo-Yemeni relations back on track.
123
00:08:33,241 --> 00:08:35,702
Arab-Western cultural détente
through the ancient sport
124
00:08:35,785 --> 00:08:38,705
of yanking poor sodding fish out of rivers.
What do you reckon?
125
00:08:39,122 --> 00:08:41,666
Well, it's a bit of a
long shot, to be honest.
126
00:08:41,750 --> 00:08:43,001
Well, don't be honest.
127
00:08:43,293 --> 00:08:46,504
Lunatic's an oil sheikh.
Got money pouring out of his arse.
128
00:08:46,588 --> 00:08:47,756
Good friend of the West.
129
00:08:47,839 --> 00:08:50,258
Good friend of the Party, too,
so give it a go, eh, dolly?
130
00:08:50,508 --> 00:08:54,137
Well, we'll certainly
bend every sinew to the job, Patricia.
131
00:08:54,220 --> 00:08:55,555
I'll set up a working party immediately.
132
00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:57,182
- What?
- Hey!
133
00:08:57,265 --> 00:09:01,394
Don't you "working party" me,
you short-arsed little pen-pusher.
134
00:09:01,478 --> 00:09:04,439
I did not say kick it into the long grass.
I said do it!
135
00:09:04,606 --> 00:09:06,775
Yes, Patricia. Right...
136
00:09:07,233 --> 00:09:08,610
away.
137
00:09:10,779 --> 00:09:12,113
Mr. Jones?
138
00:09:15,033 --> 00:09:16,451
Morning, Mr. Jones.
139
00:09:16,534 --> 00:09:19,037
Good morning, Betty.
I trust you had a nice weekend.
140
00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:22,374
Yes, thank you, Mr. Jones.
Mr. Sugden would like a word.
141
00:09:22,957 --> 00:09:25,585
Would he indeed? What do you think of that?
142
00:09:27,212 --> 00:09:28,880
It's for the caddis fly report.
143
00:09:29,506 --> 00:09:30,882
Need something racy for the cover.
144
00:09:30,965 --> 00:09:33,551
Something to rev up
the YouTube generation.
145
00:09:33,635 --> 00:09:37,430
I know it's not quite what we would
expect from a scientific paper,
146
00:09:37,514 --> 00:09:39,641
but we must keep up
with the times, Mrs. Burnside.
147
00:09:40,100 --> 00:09:42,352
Mr. Sugden asked to see you, Mr. Jones.
148
00:09:42,435 --> 00:09:44,062
I'm not too sure that I
don't have a picture
149
00:09:44,145 --> 00:09:47,148
of a caddis being eaten alive
by a spider somewhere.
150
00:09:52,112 --> 00:09:53,488
There it is. That's a beauty.
151
00:09:53,738 --> 00:09:55,615
What do you think about that for...
152
00:09:55,949 --> 00:09:56,991
Good God.
153
00:09:59,369 --> 00:10:00,703
Little too much, do you think?
154
00:10:00,787 --> 00:10:02,747
No, not if you're making a horror film.
155
00:10:03,164 --> 00:10:05,583
Look, this e-mail about the salmon thing.
156
00:10:05,667 --> 00:10:08,294
Yes. Did I miss
April Fools' Day or something?
157
00:10:08,420 --> 00:10:11,923
Did you like my little swipe at the
Foreign and Commonwealth Office wonks?
158
00:10:12,006 --> 00:10:14,801
Yeah, well, I just had another e-mail
from the FCO today.
159
00:10:15,301 --> 00:10:16,594
Rattle their cage, did I?
160
00:10:16,678 --> 00:10:18,179
Look, you wouldn't take
a meeting with her, would you?
161
00:10:18,263 --> 00:10:19,514
This Chetwode-Talbot woman.
162
00:10:19,889 --> 00:10:22,100
She represents this
Sheikh Muhammed bloke.
163
00:10:22,183 --> 00:10:23,685
Why would I want to do that?
164
00:10:24,185 --> 00:10:27,188
Why would I want to traipse
across London to discuss that nonsense?
165
00:10:27,272 --> 00:10:29,607
I've very important work to do here,
as you can very well see.
166
00:10:29,858 --> 00:10:31,776
Yeah, well, the FCO, in their infinite W,
167
00:10:31,860 --> 00:10:34,821
feel that a meeting on this
is important business, too, Alfred.
168
00:10:35,864 --> 00:10:39,534
Lord, the tendrils of this
busybody government.
169
00:10:41,035 --> 00:10:43,037
Dr. Jones, as your
Operational Line Manager,
170
00:10:43,121 --> 00:10:45,623
I am asking you with extreme prejudice
171
00:10:45,707 --> 00:10:48,710
to take a meeting
with Harriet Chetwode-Talbot.
172
00:10:50,253 --> 00:10:51,713
I take it that's an order?
173
00:10:52,755 --> 00:10:54,340
Take it how you wish.
174
00:10:56,676 --> 00:10:57,719
Nazi.
175
00:10:58,803 --> 00:11:01,264
Wanker. Morning.
176
00:11:06,144 --> 00:11:07,228
Dr. Jones?
177
00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:10,482
Miss Chetwode-Talbot is expecting me.
178
00:11:10,565 --> 00:11:13,693
Yes, it's a bit of a mouthful.
Do call me Harriet.
179
00:11:15,612 --> 00:11:17,655
- Nice to meet you.
- You, too. Do you want to come with me?
180
00:11:17,739 --> 00:11:19,115
Yes.
181
00:11:23,119 --> 00:11:24,537
Do come in.
182
00:11:26,706 --> 00:11:28,249
Please, sit down.
183
00:11:28,958 --> 00:11:32,462
Yeah, anywhere you like.
Would you like tea or coffee?
184
00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:35,256
No, thank you.
185
00:11:35,340 --> 00:11:36,633
So...
186
00:11:38,301 --> 00:11:42,263
Fitzharris & Price represent
the sheikh's assets in this country,
187
00:11:42,347 --> 00:11:45,350
including a number of estates in Scotland.
188
00:11:45,433 --> 00:11:47,852
He's a very keen fisherman,
so he asked us if we would...
189
00:11:47,936 --> 00:11:49,479
- Water.
- Sorry?
190
00:11:50,146 --> 00:11:52,148
Water, Miss Chetwode-Talbot. H2O.
191
00:11:53,149 --> 00:11:54,651
Do you want sparkling or still?
192
00:11:54,734 --> 00:11:56,611
Not for me, for the fish.
193
00:11:58,738 --> 00:12:01,991
Fish require water.
You are familiar with that concept?
194
00:12:02,992 --> 00:12:04,827
Yes. I am, yes.
195
00:12:04,911 --> 00:12:09,249
So, to save us both a lot of time,
let me keep this brief and simple.
196
00:12:09,332 --> 00:12:13,461
Here it's very cold. It rains a lot.
197
00:12:13,545 --> 00:12:17,632
Here it's very hot. It doesn't rain a lot.
Do you see the difference?
198
00:12:17,715 --> 00:12:20,718
Well, you're pointing to Saudi Arabia,
Dr. Jones, not the Yemen.
199
00:12:20,802 --> 00:12:22,595
You seem to be deliberately
missing the point.
200
00:12:22,679 --> 00:12:24,722
With respect, not really.
201
00:12:24,806 --> 00:12:27,350
You see, unlike Saudi Arabia,
parts of the Yemen
202
00:12:27,433 --> 00:12:30,395
get up to 250 millimeters of rainfall
a month in the wet season.
203
00:12:30,478 --> 00:12:32,188
It gets the edge of the monsoon, you see.
204
00:12:32,272 --> 00:12:33,314
And the dry season?
205
00:12:33,815 --> 00:12:35,525
Well, interestingly,
206
00:12:36,192 --> 00:12:39,070
recent oil explorations
207
00:12:39,153 --> 00:12:42,323
have uncovered a number
of very large freshwater aquifers,
208
00:12:42,407 --> 00:12:45,743
which could sort of recharge the wadi
in the dry season using a dam.
209
00:12:45,827 --> 00:12:46,828
I'm sure they could.
210
00:12:46,953 --> 00:12:49,706
So, when he's built his dam,
why don't you get back to me then?
211
00:12:50,206 --> 00:12:51,749
Completed, couple of years ago.
212
00:12:53,793 --> 00:12:57,088
Long-term plan is to irrigate
thousands of acres of desert.
213
00:12:57,547 --> 00:13:00,425
We could grow watermelons, maize, cotton.
214
00:13:00,508 --> 00:13:02,844
Now you're going to tell me it isn't
hot in the Yemen, too, aren't you?
215
00:13:04,012 --> 00:13:05,263
Well, in the mountainous areas,
216
00:13:05,346 --> 00:13:07,974
the nighttime temperatures
get down to well below 20 Celsius.
217
00:13:08,057 --> 00:13:10,476
And, of course, I defer to your
expert knowledge, Dr. Jones,
218
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:14,939
but I do believe that Pacific salmon
get as far south as California.
219
00:13:15,023 --> 00:13:16,482
Temperatures are not too dissimilar there.
220
00:13:19,235 --> 00:13:20,945
- Water.
- For the fish.
221
00:13:21,029 --> 00:13:22,697
- No, for me.
- Of course.
222
00:13:25,450 --> 00:13:26,618
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
223
00:13:26,701 --> 00:13:27,744
Yes, Dr. Jones?
224
00:13:27,827 --> 00:13:29,871
This is plainly ridiculous.
225
00:13:30,163 --> 00:13:33,958
There's just no way that salmon can
survive in those sort of environments.
226
00:13:34,584 --> 00:13:36,919
If your sheikh wants to pour
his money down the drain,
227
00:13:37,003 --> 00:13:38,796
why doesn't he buy himself
a football club or something?
228
00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:40,548
Look, Dr. Jones.
229
00:13:40,632 --> 00:13:43,968
I don't really think it's my place
to explain the sheikh's motivations.
230
00:13:44,719 --> 00:13:45,970
But I will say this,
231
00:13:46,054 --> 00:13:49,974
that of all of our wealthy clients,
he is different.
232
00:13:50,058 --> 00:13:53,186
I would go so far as to describe him
as a visionary man.
233
00:13:53,895 --> 00:13:55,438
- A visionary?
- Yes, I know,
234
00:13:55,521 --> 00:13:57,440
it's not a very fashionable word,
235
00:13:58,024 --> 00:13:59,817
but if you decide to take
this project with us,
236
00:13:59,901 --> 00:14:01,402
then you can judge for yourself
when you meet him.
237
00:14:01,653 --> 00:14:05,073
My line manager asked me to come here and
take this meeting to discuss your project
238
00:14:05,156 --> 00:14:07,492
and that I have done.
239
00:14:07,575 --> 00:14:10,078
I thank you for your time,
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
240
00:14:10,161 --> 00:14:11,996
I'll see myself out. Goodbye.
241
00:14:13,373 --> 00:14:14,582
Thank you.
242
00:14:23,299 --> 00:14:24,300
Did you get my e-mail?
243
00:14:24,759 --> 00:14:26,386
Yes. What did it say?
244
00:14:26,469 --> 00:14:28,680
Took the meeting.
Waste of time, as predicted.
245
00:14:28,763 --> 00:14:30,306
Now, if you don't mind,
I'll get back to my work.
246
00:14:30,390 --> 00:14:32,016
Dr. Jones.
247
00:14:36,771 --> 00:14:38,106
What is this?
248
00:14:39,899 --> 00:14:41,025
P45.
249
00:14:42,110 --> 00:14:43,611
I'm sorry, I don't... I don't understand.
250
00:14:43,945 --> 00:14:47,824
Well, a P45 is the official document
given to an employee
251
00:14:47,907 --> 00:14:50,535
when his services are no longer
required by his, or her, employer.
252
00:14:50,618 --> 00:14:52,120
Yes, but, Bernard, this has got my...
253
00:14:52,203 --> 00:14:55,289
Or you can sign this letter
254
00:14:55,373 --> 00:14:58,376
stating that you are delighted
to assign yourself, exclusively,
255
00:14:58,459 --> 00:15:01,587
to the Yemeni salmon fishing project
with immediate effect.
256
00:15:02,588 --> 00:15:04,048
It's up to you.
257
00:15:04,340 --> 00:15:06,050
But, Bernard,
258
00:15:06,134 --> 00:15:08,845
you know as well as I do
this thing is a bloody joke.
259
00:15:08,928 --> 00:15:11,139
There's no way
you can get salmon that far up a...
260
00:15:11,305 --> 00:15:12,598
Just there.
261
00:15:14,100 --> 00:15:17,645
This is blackmail, Sugden.
This is a bloody outrage.
262
00:15:18,020 --> 00:15:21,023
Fitzharris & Price will be paying
your salary while on secondment.
263
00:15:21,107 --> 00:15:24,485
Almost double what it is now.
I'd say that's a bloody outrage.
264
00:15:25,278 --> 00:15:27,905
Double? Can I have time
to think about this?
265
00:15:27,989 --> 00:15:29,407
Nope.
266
00:15:29,949 --> 00:15:31,993
- Can I borrow your pen?
- No.
267
00:15:32,076 --> 00:15:34,370
It's my special one with the italic nib.
268
00:15:35,747 --> 00:15:36,789
Hey.
269
00:15:58,895 --> 00:16:00,646
Hold it, hold it. Hold it.
270
00:16:00,730 --> 00:16:02,857
Brian, what...
What have you got in bar seven?
271
00:16:03,858 --> 00:16:05,735
I should have resigned.
272
00:16:06,694 --> 00:16:08,279
You can't afford to resign.
273
00:16:08,946 --> 00:16:10,615
Matter of principle.
274
00:16:11,073 --> 00:16:13,576
I have a standing
in the scientific community, Mary.
275
00:16:13,659 --> 00:16:15,119
A reputation.
276
00:16:16,329 --> 00:16:17,455
You have a mortgage.
277
00:16:17,538 --> 00:16:19,373
Two, three, four.
278
00:16:36,891 --> 00:16:39,060
Maybe I should resign.
279
00:16:39,602 --> 00:16:41,395
We could have a baby.
280
00:16:42,188 --> 00:16:46,526
Why not? You could stay on at work
and I could bring up the nipper.
281
00:16:46,609 --> 00:16:50,071
I could take him to the park and to school.
I could take him fishing.
282
00:16:51,113 --> 00:16:52,490
What do you think?
283
00:16:53,699 --> 00:16:55,993
They're really losing the plot in Geneva.
284
00:16:56,077 --> 00:16:57,453
One minute they're buying Euros,
285
00:16:57,537 --> 00:16:59,997
the next minute they can't
ditch them fast enough for dollars.
286
00:17:00,081 --> 00:17:02,250
They're panicking,
and guess who they want to bail them out.
287
00:17:02,333 --> 00:17:03,543
I can't imagine.
288
00:17:04,502 --> 00:17:05,837
Say a command.
289
00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:09,048
- Shut up.
- Say a command.
290
00:17:12,677 --> 00:17:14,595
What were you shouting about back there?
291
00:17:16,264 --> 00:17:18,182
Nothing.
292
00:17:18,266 --> 00:17:19,851
Say a command.
293
00:17:20,935 --> 00:17:22,770
Mar)'...
294
00:17:25,857 --> 00:17:27,859
Oh, Lord.
295
00:17:28,943 --> 00:17:31,988
Well, that should do you for a while.
296
00:17:35,408 --> 00:17:36,659
Thank you, Mary.
297
00:17:43,249 --> 00:17:44,792
Good night.
298
00:17:44,876 --> 00:17:46,294
Night, dear.
299
00:18:02,184 --> 00:18:03,686
Oh, Jesus.
300
00:18:05,855 --> 00:18:07,481
Good morning.
301
00:18:08,900 --> 00:18:10,234
Yes, Staff.
302
00:18:16,657 --> 00:18:17,950
I've gotta go.
303
00:18:18,034 --> 00:18:19,827
Now?
304
00:18:19,911 --> 00:18:22,163
Yeah. That was the call.
305
00:18:24,248 --> 00:18:25,791
Sorry.
306
00:18:27,919 --> 00:18:29,420
Is it Afghanistan?
307
00:18:32,006 --> 00:18:34,967
It's somewhere sandy, that's for sure.
308
00:18:37,303 --> 00:18:39,055
- I'll go get some tea.
- No, look...
309
00:18:39,180 --> 00:18:41,682
- No, it's all right, Robert. It's...
- No, no, come here.
310
00:18:44,060 --> 00:18:46,228
Look, the last few weeks...
311
00:18:47,855 --> 00:18:49,607
This is good.
312
00:18:49,690 --> 00:18:51,192
Wonderful.
313
00:18:51,901 --> 00:18:55,988
I'm not gonna lie to you.
I don't know how long I'm gonna be.
314
00:18:58,866 --> 00:19:00,076
Will you wait for me?
315
00:19:11,087 --> 00:19:12,296
Now go get that tea.
316
00:19:12,588 --> 00:19:15,049
You bastard.
317
00:19:23,015 --> 00:19:25,935
Well, firstly,
we would need to trap 10,000 salmon
318
00:19:26,018 --> 00:19:27,812
from the North Sea, for
the sake of argument,
319
00:19:27,895 --> 00:19:30,398
get them to the Yemen alive,
don't ask me how,
320
00:19:30,481 --> 00:19:32,066
where they would be deposited
321
00:19:32,149 --> 00:19:37,113
in temperature and oxygen-controlled
holding tanks built into a wadi
322
00:19:37,196 --> 00:19:40,241
that would, hallelujah,
open during the rainy season,
323
00:19:40,324 --> 00:19:44,578
allowing the salmon to migrate upstream
for, say, 10 kilometers,
324
00:19:44,662 --> 00:19:46,247
which would allow your sheikh
325
00:19:46,831 --> 00:19:51,127
to hoick them out of the water
to his heart's content.
326
00:19:51,210 --> 00:19:53,629
Of course, until the dry season,
327
00:19:53,713 --> 00:19:55,256
when they will all
328
00:19:56,507 --> 00:19:57,550
die.
329
00:19:57,883 --> 00:20:01,262
Well, unless we feed the wadi
all year round using the dam.
330
00:20:02,263 --> 00:20:04,598
Of course. Stupid idiot man.
331
00:20:04,682 --> 00:20:09,145
Why not use precious water resources
to support one man's sport fishing?
332
00:20:10,062 --> 00:20:13,858
So, now that we have year-round water,
333
00:20:13,941 --> 00:20:17,319
why not build some
gravel spawning grounds,
334
00:20:17,403 --> 00:20:19,405
breed the world's first Arabian salmon,
335
00:20:19,488 --> 00:20:21,699
and teach the clever fellows
to migrate to the Indian Ocean...
336
00:20:21,782 --> 00:20:23,284
Wonderful, wonderful idea.
337
00:20:23,367 --> 00:20:26,203
Singing, "Step we gaily, here we go.
Heel for heel and toe for toe."
338
00:20:26,287 --> 00:20:27,288
Rough cost?
339
00:20:27,830 --> 00:20:28,914
Cost?
340
00:20:29,623 --> 00:20:30,708
Cost.
341
00:20:31,417 --> 00:20:34,503
Forty million. No, 45...
342
00:20:34,587 --> 00:20:36,172
- Fifty million.
- Dollars?
343
00:20:36,255 --> 00:20:37,673
- Dollars.
- Dollars.
344
00:20:38,466 --> 00:20:39,508
Or pounds.
345
00:20:39,884 --> 00:20:41,052
Pounds.
346
00:20:42,470 --> 00:20:43,804
At least.
347
00:20:48,267 --> 00:20:49,977
So it's theoretically possible?
348
00:20:51,687 --> 00:20:53,689
Well, it's theoretically possible
in the same way
349
00:20:53,773 --> 00:20:56,776
as a manned mission to Mars
is theoretically possible.
350
00:20:58,110 --> 00:21:00,154
It's very impressive, Dr. Jones.
351
00:21:00,738 --> 00:21:04,325
No, it's not. It's nonsense.
Look, I just made it all up.
352
00:21:04,408 --> 00:21:05,659
No, the drawing.
353
00:21:05,993 --> 00:21:07,661
Real talent, if I might say so.
354
00:21:09,997 --> 00:21:11,373
Excellent start.
355
00:21:12,083 --> 00:21:14,126
So I suppose we should just
crack on and get things started now?
356
00:21:14,210 --> 00:21:17,713
You can't hold me to this.
I mean, these are just random ideas.
357
00:21:17,797 --> 00:21:19,673
I mean, this is a sort of joke.
358
00:21:19,757 --> 00:21:23,552
Well, I'm sure you wouldn't joke about
a 50-million-pound project, Dr. Jones.
359
00:21:23,636 --> 00:21:24,970
Not when you're in charge of it.
360
00:21:26,347 --> 00:21:28,891
Well, the sheikh is
so looking forward to meeting you,
361
00:21:28,974 --> 00:21:30,684
and he'll be back in the
next couple of weeks.
362
00:21:30,768 --> 00:21:34,271
So, in the meantime, is there
anything else that I can do for you?
363
00:21:34,355 --> 00:21:36,565
Well, as a matter of fact, there is.
364
00:21:36,649 --> 00:21:38,067
Could you arrange a meeting
365
00:21:38,150 --> 00:21:40,945
with the hydro-engineering team
from the Three Gorges Dam?
366
00:21:41,570 --> 00:21:42,655
The one in China?
367
00:21:42,905 --> 00:21:43,989
Is there another?
368
00:21:44,657 --> 00:21:46,951
British Oxygen Company.
A meeting with them as well.
369
00:21:47,034 --> 00:21:49,620
And then, what are those
great big transport aircraft called?
370
00:21:49,703 --> 00:21:51,455
The big Russian military...
371
00:21:51,539 --> 00:21:52,706
Antonovs.
372
00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:54,750
Find out about renting two of those,
373
00:21:54,834 --> 00:21:58,045
one for the fish and one to carry
all the money that we're going to need.
374
00:21:58,129 --> 00:22:00,005
When that's done,
I'd be delighted to start working.
375
00:22:00,214 --> 00:22:01,632
Good day, Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
376
00:22:01,715 --> 00:22:03,634
Good day, Dr. Jones.
377
00:22:22,570 --> 00:22:23,654
Mary!
378
00:22:23,737 --> 00:22:25,156
Up here.
379
00:22:25,948 --> 00:22:28,284
Boy, did I put a hurricane
up that Chetwode-Talbot woman.
380
00:22:28,367 --> 00:22:29,535
You would have laughed.
381
00:22:29,618 --> 00:22:33,038
I told her I wanted a meeting with
the Three Gorges Dam team from...
382
00:22:34,748 --> 00:22:35,833
Where are you going?
383
00:22:36,083 --> 00:22:37,418
Geneva. I told you.
384
00:22:38,544 --> 00:22:40,004
You didn't say now.
385
00:22:40,629 --> 00:22:42,506
Well, I am. Tomorrow.
386
00:22:42,590 --> 00:22:44,133
Well, how long are you going for?
387
00:22:44,216 --> 00:22:45,885
Six weeks, to start with.
388
00:22:46,510 --> 00:22:47,636
Six weeks?
389
00:22:48,179 --> 00:22:49,638
There's no need to shout.
390
00:22:52,349 --> 00:22:54,059
Six weeks, though, Mary.
391
00:22:54,143 --> 00:22:58,314
This is a big chance for me.
I'll be heading up the whole operation.
392
00:22:59,607 --> 00:23:02,109
Well, you could say "Congratulations."
393
00:23:06,655 --> 00:23:08,032
Great.
394
00:23:21,420 --> 00:23:24,757
Enough is enough. It's job or marriage.
395
00:23:24,840 --> 00:23:27,635
You've got to make a decision
and make it now, God damn it.
396
00:23:35,309 --> 00:23:37,144
There are planes, you know, Fred.
397
00:23:38,646 --> 00:23:41,315
And I get Sundays off. Mostly.
398
00:23:43,275 --> 00:23:46,362
You can get all your
horrible old fishing stuff out again.
399
00:23:46,445 --> 00:23:49,615
Didn't even ask me. Just went and did it.
400
00:23:49,698 --> 00:23:52,201
I know. I'm sorry.
401
00:23:52,701 --> 00:23:55,788
It just suddenly seemed
like the right decision.
402
00:23:58,749 --> 00:24:00,000
Maybe for both of us.
403
00:24:03,837 --> 00:24:06,757
Fred, I don't want to leave on bad terms.
404
00:24:09,593 --> 00:24:12,012
No. No.
405
00:24:14,807 --> 00:24:17,434
I'll open a bottle of
something fizzy. Okay?
406
00:24:20,688 --> 00:24:22,940
Reports are coming in from Afghanistan
407
00:24:23,023 --> 00:24:26,443
of a British soldier killed
while on duty in Helmand Province.
408
00:24:26,527 --> 00:24:29,029
An improvised explosive device detonated
409
00:24:29,113 --> 00:24:32,116
during a routine search
in a local village. This...
410
00:24:45,170 --> 00:24:48,299
The Minister for Culture 's
been photographed doing what?
411
00:24:49,216 --> 00:24:50,426
Naked or clothed?
412
00:24:51,051 --> 00:24:52,136
Boy or girl?
413
00:24:52,928 --> 00:24:54,013
How old?
414
00:24:54,096 --> 00:24:57,349
Jesus. Well, at least she's legal.
415
00:24:57,433 --> 00:25:01,895
Press statement from us saying that
we're a party of policy not personality,
416
00:25:01,979 --> 00:25:03,814
concentrating on the real issues of
417
00:25:03,897 --> 00:25:07,109
getting this country back on track
in times of economic hardship
418
00:25:07,192 --> 00:25:11,655
and not tabloid sensationalism,
et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
419
00:25:11,739 --> 00:25:15,075
Meanwhile, get the useless arse
on the front page of every paper
420
00:25:15,159 --> 00:25:16,702
apologizing for being born,
421
00:25:16,785 --> 00:25:20,080
big spread in Hello! with
blonde forgiving wife and cute kids.
422
00:25:20,164 --> 00:25:22,916
If they're not cute, find
a horse or something.
423
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:24,918
Joshua! Hood.
424
00:25:27,212 --> 00:25:29,089
Don't you suck your teeth at me, young man.
425
00:25:29,173 --> 00:25:31,133
I'm not one of your bitches
from the Baltimore low-rises.
426
00:25:31,216 --> 00:25:32,593
You feel me? I'm your fucking mother!
427
00:25:39,266 --> 00:25:41,310
Got to go. Meeting.
428
00:25:54,948 --> 00:25:56,200
Dear Dr. Jones,
429
00:25:56,283 --> 00:25:59,161
the sheikh has requested your company
at his estate in Glen Tulloch
430
00:25:59,244 --> 00:26:01,413
to discuss the salmon project further.
431
00:26:01,497 --> 00:26:03,791
Please advise which dates
would suit you best.
432
00:26:03,874 --> 00:26:07,336
Many thanks, Harriet Chetwode-Talbot,
Fitzharris & Price.
433
00:26:12,216 --> 00:26:15,469
Mr. Sugden would like
to see you in the canteen, sir.
434
00:26:16,261 --> 00:26:18,597
Up his arse with a meter ruler.
435
00:26:19,890 --> 00:26:20,891
Thanks, Betty.
436
00:26:22,351 --> 00:26:23,644
- Which one is he?
- Over here.
437
00:26:23,727 --> 00:26:25,270
Fred.
438
00:26:25,354 --> 00:26:27,564
Can I introduce Patricia Maxwell?
439
00:26:27,648 --> 00:26:30,609
She is the Prime Minister's press officer.
440
00:26:30,692 --> 00:26:32,236
Hello.
441
00:26:36,031 --> 00:26:40,411
Fifty million from
Sheikh Muhammed thingammy.
442
00:26:41,245 --> 00:26:43,872
It's the first-stage payment
on research development
443
00:26:43,956 --> 00:26:45,541
for the salmon fishing project.
444
00:26:45,999 --> 00:26:47,334
The PM's keeping a close eye on this one.
445
00:26:47,418 --> 00:26:48,585
It's just what we need right now,
446
00:26:48,669 --> 00:26:52,798
a bit of Anglo-Arab news
that isn't about things that explode.
447
00:26:52,881 --> 00:26:54,133
I want to know, is it a goer?
448
00:26:54,842 --> 00:26:58,053
Goer? Well, look, the complexities.
449
00:26:58,137 --> 00:26:59,972
I mean, I barely know even where to begin,
450
00:27:00,055 --> 00:27:04,309
but, well, just for starters,
we would need 10,000 live salmon.
451
00:27:04,935 --> 00:27:06,562
Is 10,000 salmon a lot?
452
00:27:06,645 --> 00:27:08,188
Well, if they're to come
from British waters,
453
00:27:08,272 --> 00:27:09,731
and I don't see where else
they're gonna come from.
454
00:27:09,815 --> 00:27:12,192
I mean, you would need the permission
of the Environment Agency.
455
00:27:12,693 --> 00:27:14,445
That's your job, Bernard.
456
00:27:15,779 --> 00:27:19,241
Okay, so you get on to the EA
and get this man his salmon.
457
00:27:19,324 --> 00:27:21,827
- Miss Maxwell. Ms.
- Mrs. Happily married.
458
00:27:21,910 --> 00:27:23,078
Details in Who's Who.
459
00:27:23,162 --> 00:27:25,789
Mrs. Maxwell, there are
two million fishermen in the UK
460
00:27:25,873 --> 00:27:27,958
who are, I would say,
unusually protective of...
461
00:27:28,041 --> 00:27:29,251
How many?
462
00:27:29,334 --> 00:27:31,545
- Two million.
- Two million?
463
00:27:32,171 --> 00:27:34,548
- Yes.
- Bloody hell.
464
00:27:35,757 --> 00:27:38,719
Two million out there
waving their little rods around?
465
00:27:40,554 --> 00:27:42,097
Are they the kind that vote our way?
466
00:27:42,181 --> 00:27:44,725
They vote for those that best
look after their fish, in my experience.
467
00:27:44,892 --> 00:27:46,393
I bet they do, I bet they do.
468
00:27:47,561 --> 00:27:51,231
Right, so, Prime Minister on the front
cover of Fishy Weekly or whatever.
469
00:27:51,315 --> 00:27:52,900
Best friend of the British fisherfolk.
470
00:27:53,192 --> 00:27:55,486
Spearing a leaping salmon. I like this.
471
00:27:56,320 --> 00:27:57,404
I like it a lo'[.
472
00:27:57,738 --> 00:28:00,115
They do have magazines, these people?
They can read?
473
00:28:00,407 --> 00:28:02,743
Aye, the Angling Times, Trout and Salmon,
474
00:28:02,826 --> 00:28:04,995
Coarse Fishing Monthly, Bassmania.
475
00:28:05,078 --> 00:28:06,205
Bassmania?
476
00:28:07,414 --> 00:28:08,832
Marvelous.
477
00:28:08,916 --> 00:28:11,668
Marvelous. That's marvelous.
478
00:28:14,755 --> 00:28:16,548
This has just become a priority project.
479
00:28:17,090 --> 00:28:18,675
Anything I can do, just give me a call.
480
00:28:19,676 --> 00:28:21,136
Two million.
481
00:28:22,596 --> 00:28:24,932
God, men, what a species.
482
00:28:25,599 --> 00:28:27,434
I don't think she got
the right end of the stick there.
483
00:28:27,518 --> 00:28:28,894
Your call, I think, Bernard.
484
00:28:28,977 --> 00:28:32,940
Ten thousand native Atlantic salmon
on my desk by Friday, please.
485
00:28:34,107 --> 00:28:37,653
Yeah, well, you'd just better
come through on this, Jones.
486
00:28:59,550 --> 00:29:01,260
It's been a long time since I was back.
487
00:29:01,343 --> 00:29:03,303
- Yes?
- A long time.
488
00:29:13,272 --> 00:29:14,273
You see?
489
00:29:14,356 --> 00:29:15,983
- Is that where he lives?
- Yes.
490
00:29:16,525 --> 00:29:19,736
He has many estates,
but this one's his favorite.
491
00:29:51,893 --> 00:29:53,687
- May I present Malcolm, the butler.
- Hello.
492
00:29:53,770 --> 00:29:56,023
- This is Dr. Jones.
- Welcome to Glen Tulloch, sir.
493
00:29:59,318 --> 00:30:02,321
His Excellency thought you might
like to avail yourself of the fishing
494
00:30:02,404 --> 00:30:03,572
while you're waiting.
495
00:30:07,576 --> 00:30:08,744
Thank you very much.
496
00:30:55,040 --> 00:30:58,210
May I present
Sheikh Muhammed bin Zaidi bani Tihama.
497
00:30:58,293 --> 00:30:59,378
This is Dr. Jones.
498
00:30:59,461 --> 00:31:01,505
It's a great pleasure to meet you,
Your Excellency.
499
00:31:01,672 --> 00:31:04,716
To meet the creator of the Woolly Jones,
the pleasure's all mine, sir.
500
00:31:05,842 --> 00:31:06,885
That's very kind.
501
00:31:06,968 --> 00:31:09,930
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot, do you realize
that for more than 10 years
502
00:31:10,013 --> 00:31:11,264
I have fished with a Woolly Jones?
503
00:31:11,348 --> 00:31:13,517
Really? What's a Woolly Jones?
504
00:31:13,600 --> 00:31:15,477
Dr. Jones invented a famous fly.
505
00:31:16,269 --> 00:31:19,898
Well, it's a sentimental habit
that some fly-tiers have
506
00:31:19,981 --> 00:31:21,274
of calling a fly after...
507
00:31:21,358 --> 00:31:24,111
Anyway, I don't approve
of that sort of thing normally, but...
508
00:31:24,194 --> 00:31:26,822
Woolly Jones. It's a great name.
509
00:31:26,905 --> 00:31:28,782
A bloody good fly, that's for sure.
510
00:31:29,574 --> 00:31:33,036
Please allow me to show you
a delightful lie just around the corner.
511
00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:35,414
Absolutely. Lead on.
512
00:31:37,833 --> 00:31:39,751
You think I'm mad?
513
00:31:39,835 --> 00:31:41,920
- No, Your Excellency. I...
- Of course you do.
514
00:31:42,003 --> 00:31:44,339
I would question your judgment
if you did not.
515
00:31:45,340 --> 00:31:47,175
Though I have judgment enough to know
516
00:31:47,259 --> 00:31:50,762
that under there lies a fish
much cleverer than I.
517
00:31:53,390 --> 00:31:57,144
I'm a great admirer of the British
for many reasons,
518
00:31:57,227 --> 00:32:00,105
but still there are mysteries to me.
519
00:32:00,188 --> 00:32:04,401
The rich are frightened of the poor.
The poor are frightened of the rich.
520
00:32:05,110 --> 00:32:07,237
And even your politicians,
521
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:09,614
they try to sound like
the people on the EastEnders.
522
00:32:11,074 --> 00:32:12,951
A wonderful program, but still.
523
00:32:13,034 --> 00:32:15,370
Yes, the great British class system.
524
00:32:16,246 --> 00:32:17,414
Indeed.
525
00:32:18,331 --> 00:32:21,418
But fishermen, I have noticed,
526
00:32:21,501 --> 00:32:24,421
they don't care whether
I'm brown or white, rich or poor,
527
00:32:24,504 --> 00:32:26,506
wearing robes or waders.
528
00:32:26,882 --> 00:32:31,011
All they care about is the fish,
the river and the game we play.
529
00:32:33,221 --> 00:32:39,936
For fishermen, the only virtues are
patience, tolerance and humility.
530
00:32:42,522 --> 00:32:43,982
I like this.
531
00:32:51,990 --> 00:32:54,868
You are struck dumb
by my naivety, Dr. Alfred.
532
00:32:54,951 --> 00:32:56,453
No, you're on.
533
00:32:56,787 --> 00:32:58,538
- What?
- You're on.
534
00:33:00,999 --> 00:33:02,834
- This is a sign.
- A sign?
535
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:06,671
A sign that I should
stop talking bollocks and fish.
536
00:33:08,215 --> 00:33:09,633
Come here.
537
00:33:15,972 --> 00:33:17,474
- Nicely done, sir.
- Thank you.
538
00:33:17,557 --> 00:33:18,600
Very nicely done.
539
00:33:37,702 --> 00:33:39,204
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
540
00:33:39,287 --> 00:33:40,664
Hello, Dr. Jones.
541
00:33:42,874 --> 00:33:43,875
Is that yours?
542
00:33:45,043 --> 00:33:46,419
- The dress.
- Yes.
543
00:33:48,630 --> 00:33:49,714
This is not mine.
544
00:33:51,132 --> 00:33:52,843
It suits you very well.
545
00:33:52,926 --> 00:33:54,261
Thank you.
546
00:33:55,178 --> 00:33:56,513
They seem to know my size.
547
00:33:57,514 --> 00:33:59,224
That not strike you as a wee bit sinister?
548
00:33:59,766 --> 00:34:02,185
The idea of the sheikh's tailor
tracking me across London
549
00:34:02,269 --> 00:34:04,104
with some kind of
satellite measuring device?
550
00:34:06,523 --> 00:34:09,025
They asked me for your size.
551
00:34:09,109 --> 00:34:11,945
And I took a guess.
552
00:34:16,908 --> 00:34:18,159
Well, for future reference,
553
00:34:18,493 --> 00:34:20,745
I have a 32-inch waist,
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
554
00:34:20,829 --> 00:34:22,455
- Right.
- Not a 34.
555
00:34:23,999 --> 00:34:25,125
No pies for me.
556
00:34:25,417 --> 00:34:26,793
Note taken, sorry about that.
557
00:34:28,420 --> 00:34:29,588
Thank you.
558
00:34:33,133 --> 00:34:36,761
Ms. Harriet has told me
of your marvelous plan.
559
00:34:38,305 --> 00:34:40,599
Plan? Well, not so much of a plan, really,
560
00:34:40,682 --> 00:34:42,726
as more of a feasibility study.
561
00:34:42,809 --> 00:34:44,936
Theoretically possible,
you said, Dr. Jones.
562
00:34:45,854 --> 00:34:48,315
Theoretically. Indeed.
563
00:34:48,815 --> 00:34:52,444
It would be a miracle of God
if it were to happen.
564
00:34:52,652 --> 00:34:54,404
I'm more of a facts-and-figures man myself.
565
00:34:54,946 --> 00:34:56,072
You're not a religious man?
566
00:34:56,364 --> 00:34:58,158
No. No, I'm not.
567
00:34:58,992 --> 00:35:01,453
But you're a fisherman, Dr. Jones.
568
00:35:02,245 --> 00:35:03,830
I'm sorry, I don't follow.
569
00:35:06,124 --> 00:35:11,755
How many hours do you fish
before you catch something? Dozens?
570
00:35:12,047 --> 00:35:13,298
Gosh, hundreds sometimes.
571
00:35:14,507 --> 00:35:17,302
Is that a good use of your time
for a facts-and-figures man?
572
00:35:19,179 --> 00:35:23,433
But you persist in the wind
and the rain and the cold
573
00:35:23,516 --> 00:35:26,102
with such poor odds of success.
574
00:35:26,519 --> 00:35:27,771
Why?
575
00:35:28,229 --> 00:35:30,899
Because you're a man of faith, Dr. Alfred.
576
00:35:33,777 --> 00:35:35,612
And in the end,
577
00:35:35,695 --> 00:35:37,864
you are rewarded for your faith
and constancy.
578
00:35:38,657 --> 00:35:40,200
With a fish.
579
00:35:40,742 --> 00:35:42,369
With due respect,
580
00:35:42,452 --> 00:35:45,246
fishing and religion are hardly
the same thing, Your Excellency.
581
00:35:45,747 --> 00:35:47,165
With equal respect,
582
00:35:47,248 --> 00:35:48,875
I have to disagree.
583
00:35:51,878 --> 00:35:53,213
A toast?
584
00:35:57,717 --> 00:35:58,843
To faith.
585
00:35:59,886 --> 00:36:01,137
And fish.
586
00:36:01,721 --> 00:36:02,889
To faith and fish.
587
00:36:03,807 --> 00:36:05,058
To faith and fish.
588
00:36:06,017 --> 00:36:07,394
And science.
589
00:36:08,395 --> 00:36:09,729
And science.
590
00:36:17,070 --> 00:36:19,614
You're unhappy tonight, Ms. Harriet?
591
00:36:19,698 --> 00:36:21,908
No. I'm fine, really.
592
00:36:22,325 --> 00:36:25,954
I have too many wives not to know
when a woman is unhappy.
593
00:36:26,037 --> 00:36:28,123
Though mine are not so quiet about it.
594
00:36:34,254 --> 00:36:40,093
Robert, he's my boyfriend,
has just been posted to Afghanistan.
595
00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:42,178
Or somewhere.
596
00:36:45,015 --> 00:36:46,099
I'm sorry.
597
00:36:46,266 --> 00:36:47,976
No, it's fine.
598
00:36:48,059 --> 00:36:49,060
For how long?
599
00:36:50,437 --> 00:36:52,814
They don't really tell us things like that.
600
00:36:52,897 --> 00:36:54,441
How worrying.
601
00:36:55,483 --> 00:36:57,068
I just try not to think about it.
602
00:36:58,945 --> 00:37:01,614
And you are married, Dr. Alfred?
Indeed.
603
00:37:01,990 --> 00:37:03,950
It is kind of her to spare you.
604
00:37:04,534 --> 00:37:08,872
My wife's actually working abroad
at the moment in Geneva, so...
605
00:37:09,622 --> 00:37:12,959
So you two have more in common
than one might suppose.
606
00:37:17,172 --> 00:37:21,301
I have put my feet in it.
Please forgive me.
607
00:37:21,801 --> 00:37:23,136
Perfect moment to retire to bed.
608
00:37:25,680 --> 00:37:26,723
- Good night.
- Good night.
609
00:37:26,806 --> 00:37:28,058
Thank you for a lovely evening.
610
00:37:28,141 --> 00:37:29,559
You're welcome.
611
00:37:30,602 --> 00:37:32,562
- Dr. Alfred.
- Your Excellency.
612
00:37:32,645 --> 00:37:35,231
I know you have been persuaded to help us,
613
00:37:35,315 --> 00:37:36,983
but unless you do this with an open heart,
614
00:37:37,067 --> 00:37:39,944
I don't think anything will come of it.
615
00:37:40,028 --> 00:37:41,821
So, please, consider.
616
00:37:41,905 --> 00:37:43,281
Of course.
617
00:37:43,364 --> 00:37:45,658
I hope we meet again.
618
00:37:50,830 --> 00:37:51,956
Dr. Jones.
619
00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:53,083
Yes?
620
00:37:53,166 --> 00:37:56,628
Well, I was just wondering
what you thought.
621
00:37:56,711 --> 00:37:58,505
Well, the sheikh's English
622
00:37:58,588 --> 00:38:01,216
has a certain tendency
towards the mystical, don't you think?
623
00:38:01,883 --> 00:38:06,179
But then, doolally as
this entire enterprise clearly is,
624
00:38:06,262 --> 00:38:09,682
I've had the most pleasant day I can
remember having for quite a long time.
625
00:38:09,766 --> 00:38:12,685
So, if the sheikh is paying, as it were,
on we go.
626
00:38:13,269 --> 00:38:14,270
Great.
627
00:38:14,687 --> 00:38:15,772
Good night, Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
628
00:38:15,855 --> 00:38:16,940
Good night, Dr. Jones.
629
00:38:17,023 --> 00:38:18,525
It's been a pleasure.
630
00:38:18,775 --> 00:38:20,401
Yes.
631
00:38:43,925 --> 00:38:45,802
Have you any idea
what an outcry there would be
632
00:38:45,885 --> 00:38:50,014
if the Environment Agency
stripped British rivers of 10,000 salmon
633
00:38:50,098 --> 00:38:52,308
and shipped them off to the effing Yemen?
634
00:38:52,392 --> 00:38:53,476
Well, how many can you spare?
635
00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:54,686
None!
636
00:38:54,769 --> 00:38:57,438
Christ, Bernard!
637
00:38:57,522 --> 00:39:00,316
Anglers, they're obsessive crazies.
638
00:39:01,067 --> 00:39:03,236
You think AI Qaeda are a threat,
think again, mate.
639
00:39:03,903 --> 00:39:05,989
I've seen a fly fisherman wade into a river
640
00:39:06,072 --> 00:39:10,076
and try and drown a canoeist
just for passing by in a Day-Glo jacket.
641
00:39:10,702 --> 00:39:14,205
You haven't got a hope in hell
of getting these fish from British rivers.
642
00:39:16,875 --> 00:39:18,960
- Yes?
- Dr. Jones. Hello.
643
00:39:19,043 --> 00:39:20,879
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot. How nice.
644
00:39:20,962 --> 00:39:22,755
- Did we book a meeting?
- No.
645
00:39:23,423 --> 00:39:25,842
You know how you said
that you wanted a meeting
646
00:39:25,925 --> 00:39:28,428
with the hydro-engineering team
from the Three Gorges Dam?
647
00:39:28,887 --> 00:39:30,471
- Did I say that?
- Yes.
648
00:39:30,555 --> 00:39:32,223
That might have been a little hasty.
649
00:39:32,307 --> 00:39:33,641
- They're outside.
- Who?
650
00:39:33,892 --> 00:39:36,519
The chief hydro-engineering team
from the Three Gorges Dam.
651
00:39:36,603 --> 00:39:37,604
Here?
652
00:39:37,729 --> 00:39:40,023
I e-mailed them about
the flow rate calculus,
653
00:39:40,106 --> 00:39:42,025
and I think there must have
been some kind of...
654
00:39:42,108 --> 00:39:44,277
My Mandarin is very rusty.
655
00:39:47,780 --> 00:39:48,781
Bloody hell.
656
00:39:48,990 --> 00:39:52,577
We are able to control the flow of water
from the upstream dam.
657
00:39:55,121 --> 00:39:56,956
But we are...
658
00:39:57,040 --> 00:40:00,793
Well, we're concerned about
the capability of the sandstone walls.
659
00:40:03,588 --> 00:40:07,091
I mean, there's the possibility
also of some flash-flood scenario.
660
00:40:10,595 --> 00:40:11,971
Thank you very much.
661
00:40:15,183 --> 00:40:16,726
My God, do you think we got away with it?
662
00:40:16,809 --> 00:40:20,021
- Do you know, I think we did.
- I'm so sorry, Dr. Jones.
663
00:40:20,104 --> 00:40:22,941
No, please don't apologize.
I think we've just found our engineers.
664
00:40:23,024 --> 00:40:24,192
- Yes.
- I mean,
665
00:40:24,275 --> 00:40:26,819
should the project, of
course, get that far.
666
00:40:27,737 --> 00:40:29,822
Your Mandarin was much better
than I expected.
667
00:40:29,989 --> 00:40:32,200
- Thank you.
- Bernard Sugden, Head of Department.
668
00:40:32,283 --> 00:40:33,284
Hello.
669
00:40:33,368 --> 00:40:34,744
Alfred not bothering you too much, I hope?
670
00:40:35,078 --> 00:40:36,120
No.
671
00:40:36,204 --> 00:40:38,081
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot from
Fitzharris & Price.
672
00:40:38,164 --> 00:40:39,332
Hello.
673
00:40:39,415 --> 00:40:41,167
Bet he doesn't even know
your first name, does he?
674
00:40:41,918 --> 00:40:44,170
So, who were all those
little chippy-chappies?
675
00:40:44,254 --> 00:40:46,506
Those are the engineers
from the Three Gorges Dam.
676
00:40:46,881 --> 00:40:47,924
What, the one in China?
677
00:40:48,007 --> 00:40:50,301
- Is there another?
- Don't think there's another one.
678
00:40:51,636 --> 00:40:53,346
Would have appreciated an introduction.
679
00:40:53,554 --> 00:40:55,807
Bernard is the man
who's responsible for
680
00:40:55,808 --> 00:40:58,059
acquiring our 10,000
native Atlantic salmon.
681
00:40:58,142 --> 00:40:59,477
How's that coming along, Bernard?
682
00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:03,022
Don't you worry about that, Fred.
It's all in hand.
683
00:41:03,606 --> 00:41:05,775
Well, don't dilly-dally.
Our end is coming along.
684
00:41:05,858 --> 00:41:07,986
- We're bang on schedule, in fact.
- Yes.
685
00:41:08,069 --> 00:41:10,989
A debrief in the canteen, or has Fred
brought in the famous sandwiches?
686
00:41:11,072 --> 00:41:13,741
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot and I
are going out for lunch, Bernard.
687
00:41:13,825 --> 00:41:15,368
There's lots to discuss.
688
00:41:15,451 --> 00:41:17,787
Clare, could you ask Betty to bring my bag?
Thank you.
689
00:41:17,870 --> 00:41:19,372
Certainly, Dr. Jones.
690
00:41:24,460 --> 00:41:27,088
Are you sure you won't have one?
691
00:41:27,171 --> 00:41:28,172
At lunch time?
692
00:41:28,798 --> 00:41:31,968
Dr. Jones, I haven't spoken
a word of Mandarin for about four years,
693
00:41:32,051 --> 00:41:34,137
so I am celebrating even if you're not.
694
00:41:34,220 --> 00:41:37,557
I only drink alcohol on the weekend.
And even then, only after 7:00.
695
00:41:38,057 --> 00:41:39,267
No exceptions?
696
00:41:39,726 --> 00:41:41,144
None that I can think of.
697
00:41:42,562 --> 00:41:44,897
Well, yeah. We got married on a Friday,
698
00:41:45,690 --> 00:41:48,609
but I think it was, as I recall,
a bank holiday in Northern Ireland,
699
00:41:48,693 --> 00:41:51,529
so I allowed myself, I think,
a glass on a technicality.
700
00:41:54,699 --> 00:41:56,909
That was an attempt at a joke,
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
701
00:41:57,577 --> 00:41:59,746
Right. Good one.
702
00:42:01,998 --> 00:42:04,083
Do you really think it's
going extremely well?
703
00:42:04,667 --> 00:42:06,627
- What?
- The project.
704
00:42:06,711 --> 00:42:08,129
The project.
705
00:42:08,838 --> 00:42:11,007
Well, it's utter nonsense, of course,
706
00:42:11,090 --> 00:42:14,719
naturally, the bagatelle of a man
with more money than sense, but...
707
00:42:15,178 --> 00:42:18,514
I haven't actually found anything
to say that it couldn't work.
708
00:42:18,598 --> 00:42:20,350
You know, theoretically, of course.
709
00:42:20,433 --> 00:42:22,852
In theory. Well, theoretically
speaking, in theory it...
710
00:42:22,935 --> 00:42:24,145
- We'll see, yes.
- Of course.
711
00:42:25,438 --> 00:42:28,649
Actually, these are the companies
that have bid for the contract
712
00:42:28,733 --> 00:42:30,693
to build the holding tanks
at the downstream end of the wadi.
713
00:42:30,777 --> 00:42:32,528
- Shall we go through these?
- Now?
714
00:42:32,612 --> 00:42:34,238
Yes, we could go through them now.
715
00:42:34,322 --> 00:42:35,948
Well, we could work and eat, no?
716
00:42:36,199 --> 00:42:38,117
Yes, I... Yes, all right, then.
717
00:42:38,201 --> 00:42:39,494
- This one's from...
- Before that, cheers.
718
00:42:40,787 --> 00:42:43,164
- Cheers.
- Very bad luck with water.
719
00:42:43,956 --> 00:42:45,833
Some people think it's bad luck.
720
00:42:49,337 --> 00:42:51,339
- EWB...
- Sorry. Excuse me.
721
00:42:51,964 --> 00:42:53,966
It's the barracks. It's Robert.
722
00:42:54,050 --> 00:42:55,259
- Sorry.
- No. Go on.
723
00:42:55,343 --> 00:42:56,427
- Hello.
- Go ahead.
724
00:42:56,511 --> 00:42:57,720
Hello?
725
00:42:59,972 --> 00:43:01,391
Yes?
726
00:43:06,270 --> 00:43:07,355
What?
727
00:43:11,317 --> 00:43:12,485
What?
728
00:43:29,836 --> 00:43:32,046
Are you all right, Ms. Chetwode-Talbot?
729
00:43:34,382 --> 00:43:36,342
He's missing in action.
730
00:43:38,803 --> 00:43:40,221
What does that mean?
731
00:43:42,932 --> 00:43:45,476
- Come upstairs and we'll get you your...
- No, I just need a minute.
732
00:43:47,895 --> 00:43:50,815
Hello. My name's Harriet Chetwode-Talbot.
733
00:43:50,898 --> 00:43:56,070
Well, I only knew him for three weeks,
but I am Robert's girlfriend.
734
00:43:56,195 --> 00:43:58,739
I was wondering if you knew anything...
735
00:44:00,366 --> 00:44:01,659
Of course. Yes.
736
00:44:01,742 --> 00:44:03,828
Sorry, Mrs. Mayers. Yes, I...
737
00:44:05,037 --> 00:44:07,790
Yes, of course. Goodbye.
738
00:44:11,919 --> 00:44:16,007
You've reached Harriet Chetwode-Talbot.
Leave a message after the beep.
739
00:44:16,090 --> 00:44:18,968
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot, it's Dr. Jones here.
740
00:44:19,051 --> 00:44:21,721
Please forgive me for calling you
on your home number.
741
00:44:21,804 --> 00:44:24,140
I was at something of a loss.
742
00:44:24,223 --> 00:44:27,810
I realize that this has not been
an easy week for you,
743
00:44:27,894 --> 00:44:31,147
but I was wondering when you might be
coming back into the office.
744
00:44:31,230 --> 00:44:32,648
I had a very productive meeting
745
00:44:32,732 --> 00:44:35,401
with the engineers
from British Oxygen Company
746
00:44:35,485 --> 00:44:37,778
and, well, there's a lot of data coming in.
747
00:44:37,862 --> 00:44:39,906
Really a considerable amount.
748
00:44:40,990 --> 00:44:45,161
I'm sure I don't have to remind you
that we are working to a deadline.
749
00:44:45,244 --> 00:44:49,290
Time and tide, as I am sure you are aware,
waits for no man.
750
00:44:50,333 --> 00:44:51,584
Or woman.
751
00:44:53,336 --> 00:44:58,299
Anyway, I look forward to hearing from you
at your earliest convenience. Goodbye.
752
00:45:33,918 --> 00:45:35,127
Can I come in?
753
00:45:36,546 --> 00:45:37,547
Why?
754
00:45:38,589 --> 00:45:40,299
Well, you might get cold.
755
00:45:48,599 --> 00:45:50,059
- Very nice.
- What?
756
00:45:51,143 --> 00:45:53,229
Your flat. Very pleasant.
757
00:46:04,574 --> 00:46:06,867
Look, I'm not...
I'm not coming into work, all right,
758
00:46:06,951 --> 00:46:08,119
because I need to stay here.
759
00:46:09,245 --> 00:46:11,330
I need to be here in case there's news.
760
00:46:12,039 --> 00:46:15,668
So, actually,
anyone with a shred of understanding,
761
00:46:17,086 --> 00:46:20,631
or humanity, or simple feeling,
762
00:46:20,715 --> 00:46:24,719
who, frankly, wasn't suffering
from some kind of Asperger's,
763
00:46:24,802 --> 00:46:26,971
would know that the last thing that I need
764
00:46:27,054 --> 00:46:30,933
is your bullying little phone call
765
00:46:31,017 --> 00:46:34,729
asking me to come into work
so that you can update me on fish.
766
00:46:36,480 --> 00:46:38,774
You want to fill me in on fishing.
767
00:46:38,858 --> 00:46:41,277
Well, Dr. Jones, you can take your work
768
00:46:41,360 --> 00:46:44,572
and you can shove it up
your unfeeling arse.
769
00:46:47,033 --> 00:46:49,285
I didn't come here to
talk to you about work.
770
00:46:49,368 --> 00:46:50,536
Then why are you here?
771
00:46:51,621 --> 00:46:53,497
I made you a sandwich.
772
00:46:55,207 --> 00:46:56,208
Why?
773
00:46:56,292 --> 00:46:58,878
You're probably not eating. Are you?
774
00:47:05,176 --> 00:47:08,220
No. You see, it's very important.
775
00:47:10,014 --> 00:47:12,350
You must eat something.
776
00:47:16,812 --> 00:47:18,314
Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
777
00:47:18,689 --> 00:47:20,024
Here.
778
00:47:22,693 --> 00:47:24,570
I don't know what to do.
779
00:47:25,821 --> 00:47:27,782
I don't know what to do because...
780
00:47:28,824 --> 00:47:30,534
I'm so sorry, Dr. Jones.
781
00:47:30,618 --> 00:47:33,579
Call me Fred. Just call me Fred.
782
00:47:34,664 --> 00:47:35,706
- You're all right now?
- Yeah.
783
00:47:36,540 --> 00:47:37,625
You all right?
784
00:47:37,708 --> 00:47:39,168
- Sorry.
- No, don't.
785
00:47:40,461 --> 00:47:43,297
Why don't I get a plate and we...
You can put this on a plate.
786
00:47:43,381 --> 00:47:46,258
- Shall I do it?
- No, it's okay. I'll do it.
787
00:48:02,108 --> 00:48:07,697
I'm so sorry about what I said before.
That is just unforgivable.
788
00:48:07,780 --> 00:48:10,074
The great thing about
people with Asperger's
789
00:48:10,157 --> 00:48:12,159
is it's very difficult
to hurt their feelings.
790
00:48:12,243 --> 00:48:13,953
So it's all right,
you can say whatever you like.
791
00:48:16,122 --> 00:48:18,791
You don't have... You know, I was upset.
792
00:48:19,417 --> 00:48:21,043
And rightly so.
793
00:48:21,127 --> 00:48:25,881
Look, I took the liberty of
buying a wee bottle of wine.
794
00:48:25,965 --> 00:48:27,007
Now, I hope you don't mind.
795
00:48:27,091 --> 00:48:31,262
I know it's not the weekend,
but this one goes very well with duck.
796
00:48:32,221 --> 00:48:33,681
I'm not very hungry.
797
00:48:34,014 --> 00:48:35,808
Harriet, you've got to try and eat...
798
00:48:35,891 --> 00:48:38,352
Is it all right...
Is it all right for me to call you Harriet?
799
00:48:48,404 --> 00:48:51,073
My father is...
800
00:48:51,323 --> 00:48:52,908
He's ex-Army,
801
00:48:52,992 --> 00:48:57,288
so he's like very stiff upper lip
and don't make a fuss about anything,
802
00:48:57,371 --> 00:48:59,707
but I'm more of a gusher.
803
00:49:00,207 --> 00:49:02,376
I think that's his word for me, anyway.
804
00:49:03,544 --> 00:49:06,046
My upper lip's never been very stiff,
I'm afraid.
805
00:49:06,839 --> 00:49:09,258
But you still have a boyfriend.
806
00:49:09,341 --> 00:49:12,511
I mean, I don't know a great deal
about such things, but...
807
00:49:13,220 --> 00:49:15,306
Robert hasn't been listed
as being dead, has he?
808
00:49:15,389 --> 00:49:19,560
No. But I just feel that
"missing in action" is Army-speak for...
809
00:49:19,643 --> 00:49:22,480
Dead? No. No, as a civil servant,
I happen to know that
810
00:49:22,563 --> 00:49:26,609
the Ministry of Defense absolutely hate
uncertainty of any kind.
811
00:49:26,692 --> 00:49:29,320
If he were dead,
they would simply say "dead."
812
00:49:29,487 --> 00:49:30,780
Can you stop using that word, please?
813
00:49:30,863 --> 00:49:32,948
- I beg your pardon.
- It's okay.
814
00:49:37,203 --> 00:49:39,371
They say that they'll
call when there's news.
815
00:49:40,664 --> 00:49:43,042
But they don't, so I guess there isn't.
816
00:49:47,713 --> 00:49:48,714
Come to the Yemen.
817
00:49:49,048 --> 00:49:51,133
We're leaving tomorrow,
just for a few days.
818
00:49:51,217 --> 00:49:53,677
- Geological studies, engineering surveys.
- No.
819
00:49:53,761 --> 00:49:55,221
We even have a team of archeologists
820
00:49:55,346 --> 00:49:57,681
checking we're not about to submerge
the Ark of the Covenant,
821
00:49:57,765 --> 00:49:59,725
which would be unfortunate, you know.
822
00:50:00,935 --> 00:50:04,438
No, I can't leave
because there might be news and...
823
00:50:04,522 --> 00:50:07,149
Well, then, you'll fly back on
the sheikh's private jet immediately.
824
00:50:09,068 --> 00:50:10,486
Why would he do that?
825
00:50:10,569 --> 00:50:12,446
Because I asked him to.
826
00:50:13,906 --> 00:50:18,160
Your services are very highly valued
by the sheikh,
827
00:50:18,244 --> 00:50:19,912
and by me.
828
00:50:23,040 --> 00:50:25,417
The project really can't do without you.
829
00:50:26,961 --> 00:50:29,463
Who the hell cares?
830
00:50:29,588 --> 00:50:32,716
Project? I mean, it's fishing.
You know, who the hell cares?
831
00:50:33,717 --> 00:50:37,847
Well, strangely enough, I do.
832
00:50:37,930 --> 00:50:40,558
I mean, I know it's probably
just a terrible folly,
833
00:50:40,641 --> 00:50:45,187
but, still, I can't help
sometimes imagining that this
834
00:50:45,271 --> 00:50:48,023
crazy enterprise might just come off.
835
00:50:48,107 --> 00:50:50,776
You know, with a bit of luck
and with the right people.
836
00:50:52,903 --> 00:50:55,698
And you, you are most definitely,
most definitely
837
00:50:55,781 --> 00:50:57,449
one of the most rightest people
838
00:50:57,533 --> 00:50:59,368
that I've had the good fortune
to come across.
839
00:51:00,202 --> 00:51:04,248
If you'll forgive the grammatical
inadequacies of that sentence.
840
00:51:39,491 --> 00:51:41,785
Do you sometimes think
that maybe we're just
841
00:51:41,869 --> 00:51:44,580
part of a lavish practical joke?
842
00:51:44,663 --> 00:51:46,707
What do you mean? Salmon, here?
843
00:51:47,917 --> 00:51:50,127
Yes, I'm beginning to suppose that.
844
00:52:19,239 --> 00:52:21,075
I don't know anyone
that goes to church any more.
845
00:52:22,242 --> 00:52:24,453
I don't think I do, either.
846
00:52:24,536 --> 00:52:27,289
On a Sunday, we go to Target.
847
00:52:42,721 --> 00:52:47,726
You know, this gravel here is perfect
for salmon to lay their eggs in between.
848
00:52:47,810 --> 00:52:49,436
Who'd have thought that here
in the middle of the Yemen,
849
00:52:49,520 --> 00:52:51,563
perfect spawning grounds for salmon?
850
00:53:00,030 --> 00:53:01,573
Fred, look.
851
00:53:01,657 --> 00:53:02,741
What?
852
00:53:04,952 --> 00:53:06,453
Yes.
853
00:53:11,083 --> 00:53:12,960
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
854
00:53:17,965 --> 00:53:19,174
Harriet, the water.
855
00:53:20,092 --> 00:53:22,219
- It's beautiful.
- It's cold.
856
00:53:23,429 --> 00:53:25,639
The water in her well is cold.
857
00:53:43,949 --> 00:53:45,409
Oh, my goodness.
858
00:53:47,161 --> 00:53:48,746
It's really happening, Fred.
859
00:53:48,829 --> 00:53:51,540
Oh, my goodness, it really is.
860
00:54:45,177 --> 00:54:46,303
Unbelievable.
861
00:54:48,180 --> 00:54:53,018
These men, they say that by bringing water,
life, to this desert,
862
00:54:53,102 --> 00:54:56,105
I am bringing the Western ways to our land.
863
00:54:56,188 --> 00:54:58,107
They say I have insulted God himself.
864
00:54:59,191 --> 00:55:00,984
I say they are fools.
865
00:55:02,611 --> 00:55:04,404
A thousand apologies, my friends.
866
00:55:04,488 --> 00:55:09,618
Please, this is not a way
to introduce you to our great enterprise.
867
00:55:12,079 --> 00:55:13,288
Look.
868
00:55:15,082 --> 00:55:17,584
Is it not magnificent?
869
00:55:18,252 --> 00:55:19,294
It's beautiful.
870
00:55:19,378 --> 00:55:20,546
Certainly is.
871
00:55:22,172 --> 00:55:23,882
Bloody amazing.
872
00:55:24,883 --> 00:55:26,844
- Hello.
- Hello.
873
00:55:57,291 --> 00:55:58,625
For the last time, Sugden,
874
00:55:58,709 --> 00:56:01,962
there is absolutely no way
I can get you these fish.
875
00:56:03,380 --> 00:56:06,216
Tom, this comes from the top. The very top.
876
00:56:06,300 --> 00:56:09,178
I don't care if God's taken up fly fishing.
877
00:56:09,261 --> 00:56:12,347
Now, I suggest you make this work, Tom.
878
00:56:12,431 --> 00:56:13,932
Is that a threat, Sugden?
879
00:56:14,266 --> 00:56:17,811
These are difficult days, Tom.
Cuts. Cuts everywhere.
880
00:56:18,729 --> 00:56:22,816
I don't know. Ls the Environment Agency
a frontline service?
881
00:56:25,194 --> 00:56:27,196
That is a threat.
882
00:56:27,279 --> 00:56:28,989
See it as an opportunity.
883
00:56:34,953 --> 00:56:38,081
Well, then. An opportunity.
884
00:56:39,917 --> 00:56:43,837
Hilary, get me Matthew Sweet
from Fly Fishing Monthly, will you?
885
00:57:09,529 --> 00:57:12,241
That's all I've been told, and so I...
886
00:57:12,324 --> 00:57:14,701
Okay. All right, then.
887
00:57:14,785 --> 00:57:18,205
Well, please, please,
please call me when...
888
00:57:20,082 --> 00:57:21,792
Okay. Bye.
889
00:57:22,292 --> 00:57:24,336
I'm so sorry. Did I wake you up?
890
00:57:24,419 --> 00:57:26,713
No. No, no. News?
891
00:57:26,797 --> 00:57:31,677
No. No, I was just
leaving a message on Robert's phone
892
00:57:33,679 --> 00:57:37,474
which is ridiculous
because he hasn't got his phone with him.
893
00:57:39,351 --> 00:57:41,270
And I know that.
894
00:57:41,353 --> 00:57:42,688
Just turning into a madwoman.
895
00:57:42,896 --> 00:57:43,939
No.
896
00:57:44,523 --> 00:57:49,236
No, when things get tricky in my life,
I talk to my fish.
897
00:57:51,363 --> 00:57:52,864
I have a pond.
898
00:57:54,032 --> 00:57:59,037
Talking to an answering machine
is no madder than chatting to koi carp.
899
00:58:00,247 --> 00:58:03,000
I just somehow wouldn't associate you
with having a tricky life.
900
00:58:05,961 --> 00:58:08,046
Well, it wouldn't do to talk about
your emotions with a colleague,
901
00:58:08,130 --> 00:58:09,589
would it, Ms. Chetwode-Talbot?
902
00:58:15,887 --> 00:58:17,389
No, I think...
903
00:58:18,557 --> 00:58:21,810
I think things are beyond tricky, really.
904
00:58:21,893 --> 00:58:24,771
They have been for some time.
905
00:58:24,855 --> 00:58:27,024
Mary's in Geneva. I'm here.
906
00:58:27,107 --> 00:58:29,067
The koi carp are alone in Surrey.
907
00:58:32,571 --> 00:58:34,865
We got married very young.
908
00:58:34,948 --> 00:58:36,700
I'm sorry, I didn't...
909
00:58:36,783 --> 00:58:38,994
I didn't really know things were hard.
910
00:58:39,077 --> 00:58:42,289
No, don't apologize. There's always hope.
911
00:58:43,582 --> 00:58:45,625
For me and for you.
912
00:58:51,882 --> 00:58:55,260
Do you know,
I can't even remember what he looks like.
913
00:58:56,094 --> 00:58:57,179
Not exactly.
914
00:58:59,431 --> 00:59:02,059
But I'm stuck,
915
00:59:02,934 --> 00:59:04,686
and I can't move on.
916
00:59:04,770 --> 00:59:06,063
Does that make any sense?
917
00:59:07,981 --> 00:59:09,816
Yes. Totally.
918
00:59:11,651 --> 00:59:14,821
I feel a bit like I've
been stuck for years.
919
00:59:14,905 --> 00:59:16,907
Yes, but you can move on.
920
00:59:18,367 --> 00:59:20,285
Well, I suppose in theory.
921
00:59:23,413 --> 00:59:25,457
You should be happy, Fred.
922
00:59:34,299 --> 00:59:36,301
I knew you'd have a pond.
923
01:00:03,787 --> 01:00:08,375
The traitor has had his chance.
924
01:00:09,584 --> 01:00:11,503
You know what to do.
925
01:00:12,963 --> 01:00:14,840
Do not fail us.
926
01:00:28,562 --> 01:00:32,399
I think the idea of taking
Scottish salmon to a foreign country
927
01:00:32,482 --> 01:00:33,692
is absolutely absurd.
928
01:00:33,775 --> 01:00:37,779
These fish have been running these
rivers for tens of thousands of years.
929
01:00:37,863 --> 01:00:39,906
I've fished the rivers
of Scotland all my life.
930
01:00:40,282 --> 01:00:41,408
Yes, Prime Minister.
931
01:00:41,491 --> 01:00:44,870
It would appear that the gentle fisherfolk
are not so effing gentle after all.
932
01:00:44,953 --> 01:00:47,080
Rape and pillage of
our national rivers...
933
01:00:47,164 --> 01:00:48,540
What, ditch the whole thing?
934
01:00:49,374 --> 01:00:51,126
No. No, no, no, Prime Minister.
935
01:00:51,209 --> 01:00:55,046
No, we must just find the fish
somewhere bloody else.
936
01:01:11,229 --> 01:01:13,482
Your turrets are blocking my reception.
937
01:01:13,565 --> 01:01:16,735
Well, I'm terribly sorry about that, madam.
If you'd care to follow me, please.
938
01:01:19,905 --> 01:01:21,406
Mrs. Maxwell.
939
01:01:21,656 --> 01:01:23,575
- Pleasure to meet you.
- It's an honor.
940
01:01:24,826 --> 01:01:26,828
Happy birthday, Patricia.
941
01:01:26,912 --> 01:01:29,873
Yes, we could do with
a few more like you in Cabinet.
942
01:01:29,956 --> 01:01:31,082
Very good, Your Excellency.
943
01:01:32,209 --> 01:01:35,962
I'm grateful, indeed, that you could
spare some time for our little project.
944
01:01:36,087 --> 01:01:39,090
Yes. Well, we have gone out on
a bit of a limb for you, Your Excellency,
945
01:01:39,174 --> 01:01:40,884
but the Prime Minister
does love his fishing.
946
01:01:40,967 --> 01:01:43,512
- Really?
- Yes. Rod's never out of his hand.
947
01:01:44,763 --> 01:01:46,348
Anyway, down to business.
948
01:01:46,806 --> 01:01:48,475
The fish. The salmon.
949
01:01:48,476 --> 01:01:50,143
We're not gonna get it
out of British waters.
950
01:01:51,102 --> 01:01:53,605
There's a bloody big fuss about it,
as no doubt you've heard.
951
01:01:53,772 --> 01:01:56,024
Don't know what it is about fishing.
Anyway, no-goer.
952
01:01:58,610 --> 01:02:00,445
- Yes, but I thought...
- However,
953
01:02:01,821 --> 01:02:04,199
I have solved your problem.
954
01:02:05,825 --> 01:02:08,370
See? There must be thousands
in this one alone.
955
01:02:08,620 --> 01:02:11,456
This guy's got four fish farms
up and down the coast.
956
01:02:11,540 --> 01:02:14,209
Stocks all the Tescos.
Right under your nose.
957
01:02:14,292 --> 01:02:17,212
These fish were bred for the dinner table.
It's barbaric.
958
01:02:17,295 --> 01:02:18,713
They've never run in their lives.
959
01:02:18,797 --> 01:02:20,549
Neither have their forebears
for two generations.
960
01:02:20,632 --> 01:02:21,633
Why would they run for us?
961
01:02:21,716 --> 01:02:23,593
The difference in these salmon...
962
01:02:23,677 --> 01:02:24,719
We'd open the sluices
963
01:02:24,803 --> 01:02:27,222
and they would just drift off downstream
never to be seen again.
964
01:02:27,305 --> 01:02:29,412
Well, get a couple of
days fishing out of it,
965
01:02:29,413 --> 01:02:31,518
then just re-stock or
whatever the word is.
966
01:02:31,601 --> 01:02:32,852
Seems to be no shortage of them.
967
01:02:33,478 --> 01:02:36,314
In transit for the supermarkets.
968
01:02:36,398 --> 01:02:39,401
These fish will never run.
They're just not right.
969
01:02:39,484 --> 01:02:41,278
Not right?
Well, a fish is a fish is a fish, isn't it?
970
01:02:41,361 --> 01:02:45,699
No. You see, Mrs. Maxwell, I have a vision.
971
01:02:46,533 --> 01:02:49,035
Tired, bloated pretenders
are not part of this vision.
972
01:02:49,536 --> 01:02:52,789
Well, unfortunately,
Her Majesty's Government also has a vision,
973
01:02:52,872 --> 01:02:55,458
and that vision is farmed fish or no fish.
974
01:02:55,542 --> 01:02:57,377
Then I must thank you
for your precious time.
975
01:02:57,669 --> 01:02:58,670
And decline.
976
01:03:01,673 --> 01:03:05,051
No advisers, either.
Back at your desk on Monday, Fred.
977
01:03:06,344 --> 01:03:08,305
Well, in that case, I resign.
978
01:03:08,388 --> 01:03:09,598
Resignation accepted.
979
01:03:09,681 --> 01:03:11,516
- Thank you.
- Pleasure.
980
01:03:14,811 --> 01:03:17,439
So, this leaves us with what?
981
01:03:17,522 --> 01:03:19,190
Well, with no salmon.
982
01:03:21,067 --> 01:03:23,612
We must have faith, Dr. Alfred.
983
01:03:23,695 --> 01:03:25,864
Well, that's a very laudable sentiment,
Your Excellency,
984
01:03:25,947 --> 01:03:28,783
but we're running out of time.
985
01:03:28,867 --> 01:03:31,077
Can't catch faith with a fishing rod.
986
01:03:56,227 --> 01:03:57,646
Hello, Fred.
987
01:04:08,490 --> 01:04:10,700
Sheikh Muhammed bin Zaidi bani Tihama!
988
01:04:17,916 --> 01:04:20,251
Are you okay? Are you okay?
989
01:04:21,336 --> 01:04:22,921
I didn't think he looked right, that man.
990
01:04:23,254 --> 01:04:25,173
And he pulled out a gun! Are you all right?
991
01:04:25,256 --> 01:04:26,299
- Yes.
- Are you sure?
992
01:04:26,383 --> 01:04:27,384
Yes.
993
01:04:31,262 --> 01:04:33,848
Thank you. Thank you, Dr. Alfred.
Thank you very much.
994
01:04:33,932 --> 01:04:37,602
Don't be silly. Don't be silly.
It was only a cast, really.
995
01:04:38,853 --> 01:04:40,480
A very good cast.
996
01:04:41,731 --> 01:04:44,526
An essential cast, one might say.
997
01:04:44,609 --> 01:04:47,987
Yes, I suppose one might say that.
998
01:04:48,238 --> 01:04:50,365
- Here.
- My God, Fred. Are you all right?
999
01:04:50,448 --> 01:04:52,784
Yeah, yeah. It was very quick.
It was over in a flash, really.
1000
01:04:52,867 --> 01:04:54,035
How did you do that?
1001
01:04:54,119 --> 01:04:56,287
I did a right-handed snake roll.
Did I get him?
1002
01:04:56,371 --> 01:04:58,873
Yes, it was extraordinary.
1003
01:05:00,959 --> 01:05:02,627
- Are you all right?
- Yes, thank you very much.
1004
01:05:04,003 --> 01:05:07,173
Please, continue your work
as if nothing had happened.
1005
01:05:07,257 --> 01:05:08,550
Of course, of course.
1006
01:05:08,633 --> 01:05:09,759
I owe you my life.
1007
01:05:09,843 --> 01:05:11,344
No. Please, come on. Anyone would have...
1008
01:05:11,428 --> 01:05:14,681
This is not one of those
British metaphors, Dr. Alfred.
1009
01:05:14,764 --> 01:05:16,099
The debt will be repaid.
1010
01:05:17,684 --> 01:05:19,060
- Bye, now.
- Goodbye.
1011
01:05:19,144 --> 01:05:20,478
Bye.
1012
01:05:28,653 --> 01:05:31,573
In response to the Right
Honorable Member's question
1013
01:05:31,656 --> 01:05:33,783
of the 7th of last month,
1014
01:05:33,867 --> 01:05:36,453
the Ministry of Defense can now confirm
1015
01:05:36,536 --> 01:05:39,247
that an engagement by
British Special Forces
1016
01:05:39,330 --> 01:05:43,126
against known terrorists
did occur on the 13th of September.
1017
01:05:44,043 --> 01:05:46,421
The details of this
operation are classified.
1018
01:05:46,504 --> 01:05:49,841
However, I am at liberty to say
1019
01:05:49,924 --> 01:05:53,094
that serious casualties
were incurred by the British forces.
1020
01:05:54,512 --> 01:05:58,516
I deeply regret to inform the House
that there were no survivors.
1021
01:05:59,851 --> 01:06:03,104
An internal investigation
is being carried out.
1022
01:06:57,575 --> 01:06:59,994
Sorry to wake you up.
1023
01:07:00,578 --> 01:07:02,664
- No, don't be.
- It's just...
1024
01:07:03,248 --> 01:07:04,332
It's okay.
1025
01:07:04,415 --> 01:07:06,084
It's just...
1026
01:07:06,167 --> 01:07:09,212
I just never got the chance
to really know him.
1027
01:08:14,360 --> 01:08:15,653
Mary?
1028
01:08:15,778 --> 01:08:18,156
Fred? There you are.
1029
01:08:18,239 --> 01:08:19,490
I had no idea you were...
1030
01:08:19,574 --> 01:08:22,076
I got a day off and thought,
"Why not surprise him?"
1031
01:08:22,160 --> 01:08:24,996
I've got this wonderful
Swiss mountain Comté
1032
01:08:25,079 --> 01:08:28,082
from a little shop round the corner
in Geneva.
1033
01:08:29,000 --> 01:08:31,002
Is everything all right, Fred?
1034
01:08:31,085 --> 01:08:33,755
Where's your suit and tie? Day off?
1035
01:08:34,839 --> 01:08:36,007
I resigned.
1036
01:08:37,342 --> 01:08:38,509
Don't be ridiculous.
1037
01:08:39,052 --> 01:08:40,762
You've resigned?
1038
01:08:41,012 --> 01:08:43,473
What about your pension? It's final salary.
1039
01:08:44,098 --> 01:08:46,601
Well, the government pulled out
of the salmon fishing project
1040
01:08:46,684 --> 01:08:48,811
and we'd put a lot of
time and energy into it.
1041
01:08:48,895 --> 01:08:51,522
I didn't want to walk away from that.
1042
01:08:52,106 --> 01:08:53,107
Well?
1043
01:08:53,816 --> 01:08:57,028
Well, everyone involved.
1044
01:08:57,862 --> 01:09:00,782
I'm still being paid,
if that's what you're worried about.
1045
01:09:00,865 --> 01:09:02,659
Fitzharris & Price have been more than...
1046
01:09:02,742 --> 01:09:05,703
I might have known she'd be involved.
1047
01:09:05,787 --> 01:09:08,581
If you're referring to Harriet,
we're working on the project together.
1048
01:09:08,665 --> 01:09:09,749
Of course she's involved.
1049
01:09:09,832 --> 01:09:12,502
- Harriet?
- What do you mean exactly by that, Mary?
1050
01:09:12,585 --> 01:09:15,880
I've seen her photograph
on the Fitzharris & Price website.
1051
01:09:16,673 --> 01:09:18,049
You're making a fool of yourself.
1052
01:09:18,132 --> 01:09:19,384
Now it's you that's being ridiculous.
1053
01:09:19,717 --> 01:09:21,135
Am I'.?
1054
01:09:21,219 --> 01:09:24,389
I'm not the one abandoning a decent,
highly respected job
1055
01:09:24,472 --> 01:09:28,101
for a joke fishing project
and a short-skirted office girl.
1056
01:09:28,184 --> 01:09:30,853
- She's not an office girl.
- What is she, then, Fred? Hey?
1057
01:09:30,937 --> 01:09:32,188
Just what is she?
1058
01:09:32,271 --> 01:09:33,731
She's a colleague.
1059
01:09:33,815 --> 01:09:36,150
- She's a very talented colleague and...
- And?
1060
01:09:36,901 --> 01:09:39,404
And a friend! She's just a friend!
1061
01:09:58,256 --> 01:10:00,258
Are you in love with her?
1062
01:10:03,302 --> 01:10:06,180
I've done nothing, Mary.
I have no expectations.
1063
01:10:06,264 --> 01:10:08,850
I didn't ask about your expectations.
1064
01:10:09,809 --> 01:10:12,395
I asked if you were in love with her.
1065
01:10:16,691 --> 01:10:20,903
This is a mid-life crisis.
It's textbook, it's pathetic.
1066
01:10:20,987 --> 01:10:22,030
I'm so sorry, Mary.
1067
01:10:23,197 --> 01:10:26,617
You'll be back, Fred. Or you'll try.
1068
01:10:28,202 --> 01:10:31,581
Six months and you'll be
begging to be taken back in.
1069
01:10:33,291 --> 01:10:34,751
It's in your DNA.
1070
01:10:35,501 --> 01:10:38,796
You'd think a bloody scientist
would know that much!
1071
01:11:12,163 --> 01:11:16,084
Six months and you'll be
begging to be taken back in.
1072
01:11:17,335 --> 01:11:19,587
It's in your DNA.
1073
01:11:31,432 --> 01:11:33,810
We don't need native river fish.
1074
01:11:33,893 --> 01:11:36,104
We'll be all right with farmed salmon.
1075
01:11:37,271 --> 01:11:39,732
I know. I don't much like them, but...
1076
01:11:39,816 --> 01:11:41,484
Well, they will run. I know it.
1077
01:11:43,569 --> 01:11:45,113
Yes, Your Excellency.
1078
01:11:46,072 --> 01:11:49,450
Despite our moral
and philosophical objections,
1079
01:11:49,534 --> 01:11:51,452
farmed salmon will run.
1080
01:11:51,536 --> 01:11:53,162
I'm absolutely sure of it.
1081
01:11:53,871 --> 01:11:55,873
You are tireless, Doctor.
1082
01:11:56,874 --> 01:11:59,043
You have uncovered some new research?
1083
01:11:59,460 --> 01:12:01,379
A new paper, perhaps?
1084
01:12:01,462 --> 01:12:03,047
No, I just know it.
1085
01:12:04,882 --> 01:12:08,469
You just know it. I see.
1086
01:12:14,976 --> 01:12:16,644
Faith, Dr. Alfred.
1087
01:12:20,398 --> 01:12:23,192
Damn it. Yes, all right, then, faith.
1088
01:13:00,021 --> 01:13:01,147
So?
1089
01:13:03,316 --> 01:13:04,317
They're alive.
1090
01:13:36,224 --> 01:13:38,184
That hurts!
1091
01:13:40,353 --> 01:13:42,104
Sorry, sweetie.
1092
01:13:42,188 --> 01:13:43,314
- Mrs. Maxwell?
- What?
1093
01:13:43,397 --> 01:13:45,900
Amazing news.
One of the officers presumed dead,
1094
01:13:45,983 --> 01:13:48,236
Captain Robert Mayers,
has been found alive.
1095
01:13:48,986 --> 01:13:51,239
- Good.
- Yes, we're very pleased.
1096
01:13:51,322 --> 01:13:52,448
Yes, very good.
1097
01:13:52,531 --> 01:13:54,158
It's very good news for the family.
1098
01:13:54,242 --> 01:13:56,494
And his girlfriend, Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
1099
01:13:56,577 --> 01:14:00,957
Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Who else knows about this?
1100
01:14:01,040 --> 01:14:02,250
You're the first to know.
1101
01:14:02,333 --> 01:14:04,043
Right, keep it that way.
1102
01:14:04,126 --> 01:14:05,878
Total press embargo. Do you understand?
1103
01:14:05,962 --> 01:14:08,714
- Yes, Mrs. Maxwell.
- That salmon fishing thing.
1104
01:14:08,798 --> 01:14:10,174
Is that still happening?
1105
01:14:10,258 --> 01:14:11,759
As far as I'm aware.
1106
01:14:11,842 --> 01:14:13,427
- It is?
- Yes.
1107
01:14:13,511 --> 01:14:14,929
- Yemen?
- Yes.
1108
01:14:15,429 --> 01:14:16,806
Perfect.
1109
01:14:17,890 --> 01:14:21,060
Yes, this is all coming
together very nicely.
1110
01:15:15,072 --> 01:15:18,200
I intended to create a small miracle.
1111
01:15:18,284 --> 01:15:22,580
Something to glorify God
and bring our tribes together.
1112
01:15:23,414 --> 01:15:28,085
Sometimes I wonder if we haven't
created something that glorifies man.
1113
01:15:29,378 --> 01:15:30,588
It is a very fine line.
1114
01:15:32,381 --> 01:15:34,091
Hubris, Dr. Alfred.
1115
01:15:35,801 --> 01:15:37,261
Hubris.
1116
01:15:55,738 --> 01:15:57,823
- It's nice here.
- Beautiful.
1117
01:16:07,124 --> 01:16:13,005
You know, Fred, this project,
it saved me. I think.
1118
01:16:14,215 --> 01:16:16,050
You know, with everything that happened.
1119
01:16:18,427 --> 01:16:20,805
So those farmed fish had better run.
1120
01:16:20,888 --> 01:16:22,723
- I believe they will.
- You do?
1121
01:16:23,140 --> 01:16:26,811
Yes, I believe that it's in the very core
of their being to head upstream
1122
01:16:26,894 --> 01:16:30,856
even if they never have,
even if the parent fish never have.
1123
01:16:34,860 --> 01:16:36,404
Look at this.
1124
01:16:39,031 --> 01:16:40,491
Look at that.
1125
01:16:44,078 --> 01:16:46,288
Mary said something about me.
1126
01:16:48,666 --> 01:16:51,252
She said that I was
genetically programmed to
1127
01:16:51,253 --> 01:16:53,838
return to a dull
pedestrian life with her.
1128
01:16:54,755 --> 01:16:56,590
That it was in my DNA.
1129
01:16:59,343 --> 01:17:00,428
Do you think that you are?
1130
01:17:02,221 --> 01:17:06,517
No. No, I belong here. I always have done.
1131
01:17:18,362 --> 01:17:19,864
- Harriet.
- Yes.
1132
01:17:25,244 --> 01:17:29,039
I was wondering about you and me.
1133
01:17:32,501 --> 01:17:34,795
The theoretical possibility in the same way
1134
01:17:34,879 --> 01:17:38,466
as a manned mission to Mars
is a theoretical possibility.
1135
01:17:38,549 --> 01:17:39,925
Obviously.
1136
01:17:42,970 --> 01:17:45,181
Or salmon fishing in the Yemen.
1137
01:17:54,440 --> 01:17:55,483
Yes.
1138
01:17:56,942 --> 01:17:58,652
- Yes?
- Yes.
1139
01:18:01,572 --> 01:18:03,616
I just need a little time.
1140
01:18:04,533 --> 01:18:06,994
Of course, of course.
All the time you want.
1141
01:18:09,079 --> 01:18:10,623
Thank you.
1142
01:18:12,625 --> 01:18:14,168
Thank you.
1143
01:18:27,723 --> 01:18:29,391
- Mr. Foreign Secretary.
- Brian Fleet.
1144
01:18:29,475 --> 01:18:30,476
The great fisherman.
1145
01:18:30,726 --> 01:18:33,604
The great... Well, it has been
a little while, to be honest.
1146
01:18:33,687 --> 01:18:35,272
A bit rusty, you know.
1147
01:18:35,356 --> 01:18:37,942
Some skills are never forgotten.
1148
01:18:38,025 --> 01:18:42,071
Please, follow this man to your tent.
I shall join you shortly.
1149
01:18:42,154 --> 01:18:44,031
What have you been saying?
1150
01:18:44,114 --> 01:18:46,742
Fishing's the last thing anyone's
gonna be interested in, trust me.
1151
01:18:46,825 --> 01:18:50,204
Get ready for the photo op of a lifetime,
Sonny Jim.
1152
01:18:50,287 --> 01:18:52,915
N-S-R. No salmon required.
1153
01:18:58,796 --> 01:19:01,799
Is that a Woolly Jones?
1154
01:19:01,882 --> 01:19:03,509
No, this is a new one I've invented.
1155
01:19:03,592 --> 01:19:05,219
IS it?
1156
01:19:05,302 --> 01:19:06,428
What's it called?
1157
01:19:09,640 --> 01:19:13,102
This one is called
the Chetwode-Talbot Beauty.
1158
01:19:13,602 --> 01:19:14,728
That's very nice.
1159
01:19:14,812 --> 01:19:16,397
It's true.
1160
01:19:16,897 --> 01:19:17,982
You're not being funny?
1161
01:19:18,065 --> 01:19:20,234
No, I don't have a sense of humor,
as you recall.
1162
01:19:20,317 --> 01:19:22,570
That is true.
1163
01:19:29,827 --> 01:19:31,996
- Beautiful.
- Yes, she is.
1164
01:19:47,344 --> 01:19:48,554
Here.
1165
01:19:48,637 --> 01:19:50,347
Thank you.
1166
01:19:53,267 --> 01:19:56,562
Don't you think we should be
doing something, Fred? Preparing?
1167
01:19:56,645 --> 01:19:57,896
L am preparing...
1168
01:19:57,980 --> 01:20:00,107
Well, for the whole thing, you know.
1169
01:20:00,190 --> 01:20:03,444
Everything's done, Harriet, it's fine.
Just relax.
1170
01:20:03,527 --> 01:20:05,529
Did you just...
1171
01:20:05,613 --> 01:20:08,240
Dr. Alfred Jones just told me to relax.
1172
01:20:10,034 --> 01:20:12,620
What is the world coming to?
1173
01:20:25,132 --> 01:20:26,216
Oh, my God.
1174
01:20:34,058 --> 01:20:35,100
Harriet.
1175
01:21:16,684 --> 01:21:18,268
Right, Harriet and Robert...
1176
01:21:30,906 --> 01:21:32,700
Right, okay. Shut up, hacks.
1177
01:21:32,783 --> 01:21:34,785
No military stuff. It's classified.
1178
01:21:34,868 --> 01:21:36,036
Anyway, I don't think you'd understand it.
1179
01:21:36,120 --> 01:21:39,873
The only thing you need to know
is that this man, Captain Mayers here,
1180
01:21:39,957 --> 01:21:41,417
is a war hero.
1181
01:21:42,126 --> 01:21:43,836
Human interest stuff only. Sir.
1182
01:21:44,128 --> 01:21:46,922
Harriet, can you tell us how it feels?
1183
01:21:47,005 --> 01:21:50,718
It feels like it's a...
1184
01:21:50,801 --> 01:21:54,054
It's a... It's a shock, but it's wonderful.
1185
01:21:54,138 --> 01:21:55,681
Please can we have a kiss?
1186
01:21:57,516 --> 01:21:59,143
Go on. Come on.
1187
01:22:06,400 --> 01:22:08,193
I am sorry, my friend.
1188
01:22:08,277 --> 01:22:10,988
No-No, it's...
1189
01:22:11,071 --> 01:22:13,365
It's a miracle.
1190
01:22:13,449 --> 01:22:14,742
Indeed.
1191
01:22:16,452 --> 01:22:19,580
Nevertheless, I'm sorry.
1192
01:22:20,497 --> 01:22:22,166
All right, gentlemen, gentlemen,
I think that's all.
1193
01:22:22,249 --> 01:22:24,585
A little privacy for the couple, please.
1194
01:22:24,668 --> 01:22:26,754
I'd just like to say
that the British government
1195
01:22:26,837 --> 01:22:29,214
is proud to have played
a small but significant part
1196
01:22:29,298 --> 01:22:33,844
in this extraordinary reunion
of Harriet and Captain Mayers.
1197
01:22:35,179 --> 01:22:36,972
That's what we're here for.
1198
01:23:00,954 --> 01:23:02,956
This is strange.
1199
01:23:03,999 --> 01:23:05,292
Bad strange?
1200
01:23:05,375 --> 01:23:07,044
No, good strange.
1201
01:23:14,593 --> 01:23:17,721
Do you mind if we don't...
1202
01:23:18,597 --> 01:23:20,307
No, of course not.
1203
01:23:22,601 --> 01:23:24,228
There's no rush.
1204
01:23:29,441 --> 01:23:31,235
Will you just hold me?
1205
01:23:43,622 --> 01:23:46,291
How did you get caught up in this, H?
1206
01:23:47,334 --> 01:23:50,838
Salmon fishing out here? It's ridiculous.
1207
01:23:53,507 --> 01:23:56,093
Well, you never know with the sheikh.
1208
01:23:58,011 --> 01:24:02,683
I expect there will be a six-star hotel
and a golf course before you know it.
1209
01:24:03,475 --> 01:24:05,602
That's not his style at all.
1210
01:24:08,480 --> 01:24:10,274
Don't you believe it.
1211
01:24:12,484 --> 01:24:15,153
He's gotta make his money back somehow.
1212
01:24:16,154 --> 01:24:18,448
They're no fools, these Arabs.
1213
01:25:25,933 --> 01:25:27,935
You don't sleep, either?
1214
01:25:29,186 --> 01:25:30,646
No, not much.
1215
01:25:31,688 --> 01:25:32,898
Well...
1216
01:25:35,525 --> 01:25:39,446
At least there's no bloody journos
around at this time, anyway.
1217
01:25:43,325 --> 01:25:46,286
You've been very good to Harriet, Fred.
1218
01:25:46,370 --> 01:25:48,163
I appreciate it.
1219
01:25:48,538 --> 01:25:50,415
I love her.
1220
01:25:51,333 --> 01:25:53,210
Yeah, she's great.
1221
01:25:53,919 --> 01:25:55,921
She's really great.
1222
01:25:56,505 --> 01:25:57,589
No.
1223
01:25:59,174 --> 01:26:00,550
I love her.
1224
01:26:14,606 --> 01:26:16,274
Does she love you?
1225
01:26:17,859 --> 01:26:19,486
I don't know now.
1226
01:26:20,654 --> 01:26:23,490
Yesterday, you weren't alive.
1227
01:26:23,740 --> 01:26:25,909
Well, I apologize for
not being dead in a ditch.
1228
01:26:28,161 --> 01:26:30,914
I don't think I can accept your apology.
1229
01:26:34,292 --> 01:26:35,836
Is that a joke?
1230
01:26:39,256 --> 01:26:43,635
Yes, yes, sort of. I'm not...
I've never been very good at jokes.
1231
01:26:48,932 --> 01:26:51,226
It's all right, Robert. Really.
1232
01:26:52,602 --> 01:26:54,146
It's all right.
1233
01:27:04,156 --> 01:27:05,949
The day has arrived.
1234
01:27:06,950 --> 01:27:09,077
Before the dam, this was a dry riverbed.
1235
01:27:09,870 --> 01:27:12,581
And now, as you all can see, we have water.
1236
01:27:13,206 --> 01:27:17,586
And today, we hope we shall discover
the one missing thing.
1237
01:27:17,878 --> 01:27:20,130
So, thank you, one and all, for coming
1238
01:27:20,964 --> 01:27:23,759
as not one of you, not even my dear self,
1239
01:27:23,842 --> 01:27:27,554
knows if this curious experiment of mine
will actually work.
1240
01:27:27,929 --> 01:27:29,890
It better had bloody work.
1241
01:27:29,973 --> 01:27:32,184
Doesn't matter if it works or not, dolly.
1242
01:27:32,267 --> 01:27:33,894
All that matters is you.
1243
01:27:33,977 --> 01:27:36,229
Fishing on Sky tonight with our war hero.
1244
01:27:36,313 --> 01:27:38,732
- I haven't done this in years.
- For God's sake.
1245
01:27:38,815 --> 01:27:40,233
There are 10,000 fish in there.
1246
01:27:40,317 --> 01:27:44,404
If you can't hook one of them,
you can just flip off back to Transport.
1247
01:27:44,488 --> 01:27:48,325
My intention is to color
this desert in green.
1248
01:27:49,826 --> 01:27:52,120
Make an agricultural
industry for my people,
1249
01:27:52,204 --> 01:27:55,582
and the sons and daughters of my people
for generations to come.
1250
01:27:56,166 --> 01:27:57,959
- Right on cue.
- So here we are,
1251
01:27:58,043 --> 01:28:01,254
Muslims, Christians and the odd heathen.
1252
01:28:01,338 --> 01:28:05,759
We are all gathered here in
an act of faith. And why not?
1253
01:28:07,677 --> 01:28:11,389
And now, the moment
that we are all waiting for,
1254
01:28:11,473 --> 01:28:14,351
the fruits of all our efforts.
1255
01:28:15,852 --> 01:28:16,937
The moment of truth.
1256
01:28:18,647 --> 01:28:19,856
Open the sluices.
1257
01:28:35,247 --> 01:28:36,289
Where's it going?
1258
01:28:36,373 --> 01:28:38,875
It's going the wrong way.
It's heading downstream.
1259
01:28:52,430 --> 01:28:53,515
Wait a minute.
1260
01:29:01,439 --> 01:29:04,067
It's turned around. Wait. Wait, wait.
1261
01:29:04,901 --> 01:29:06,486
- Look, they're going upstream.
- Wait. Wait, wait, wait.
1262
01:29:09,531 --> 01:29:11,741
Oh, my God, they're running. Fred, look.
1263
01:29:16,246 --> 01:29:17,998
Look!
1264
01:29:18,081 --> 01:29:20,125
- They're running, Fred!
- They're running!
1265
01:29:24,254 --> 01:29:27,424
Blondie. Come down here, come on.
Come down here now.
1266
01:29:27,507 --> 01:29:29,509
Look, we ought to get a picture of him
with the sheikh.
1267
01:29:32,053 --> 01:29:34,055
- It's working, Your Excellency.
- It is.
1268
01:29:34,139 --> 01:29:36,641
They are running upstream, look!
1269
01:29:36,725 --> 01:29:39,311
Let's go fishing, Dr. Alfred.
1270
01:30:02,876 --> 01:30:04,044
Turn it on, dolly.
1271
01:30:04,294 --> 01:30:05,378
I need to get further out.
1272
01:30:05,462 --> 01:30:08,506
For God's sakes. Come on, off you go!
1273
01:30:09,257 --> 01:30:10,592
Have you got that?
1274
01:30:10,675 --> 01:30:13,720
Yes, Mrs. Maxwell.
But can we get them closer together?
1275
01:30:13,803 --> 01:30:16,097
God, I'll give it a go. Robert, darling.
1276
01:30:17,015 --> 01:30:18,934
Can you come... Can you turn around a bit?
1277
01:30:20,518 --> 01:30:22,812
I'm worried about
what he's doing with his rod.
1278
01:30:41,331 --> 01:30:42,916
Lovely. And, Brian,
1279
01:30:43,375 --> 01:30:45,418
just a nice smile, that would be good.
1280
01:30:45,502 --> 01:30:47,128
Did you get that?
1281
01:30:49,089 --> 01:30:51,466
God, he's useless, isn't he?
1282
01:30:58,515 --> 01:31:01,101
More fun without waders, Dr. Alfred.
1283
01:31:01,184 --> 01:31:02,269
Yes.
1284
01:31:20,036 --> 01:31:21,788
I think I caught one, Dr. Alfred.
1285
01:31:21,871 --> 01:31:23,206
It's a beauty, Your Excellency.
1286
01:31:27,544 --> 01:31:29,254
Look out behind you!
1287
01:31:29,337 --> 01:31:31,047
Your Excellency, behind you!
1288
01:31:57,198 --> 01:31:58,325
Step UP...
1289
01:31:58,408 --> 01:32:00,452
No, you first!
1290
01:32:01,077 --> 01:32:04,581
I repay my debts, Dr. Alfred.
1291
01:32:04,664 --> 01:32:07,250
- Okay. I'll pull you up. After...
- Okay.
1292
01:32:15,842 --> 01:32:19,054
Here, Your Excellency, hold on.
Here, come on.
1293
01:33:51,354 --> 01:33:54,607
We won't need these any more.
1294
01:34:23,553 --> 01:34:26,306
I just don't understand who would do this.
1295
01:34:26,389 --> 01:34:27,765
Why would they do this?
1296
01:34:29,559 --> 01:34:32,270
I know who. And I know why.
1297
01:34:32,353 --> 01:34:35,982
Can't you find them? Arrest them?
1298
01:34:36,065 --> 01:34:37,358
What for?
1299
01:34:39,110 --> 01:34:40,320
Justice.
1300
01:34:43,823 --> 01:34:45,158
Justice.
1301
01:34:48,286 --> 01:34:52,999
I think these destroyers...
Bad men, certainly.
1302
01:34:54,751 --> 01:34:56,711
But I think perhaps they have a point.
1303
01:34:58,880 --> 01:35:03,134
I expected people to understand
what we were doing here.
1304
01:35:03,593 --> 01:35:08,223
I expected them to see that it was
really not about fishing at all.
1305
01:35:12,268 --> 01:35:16,314
In the end, I asked for too much.
1306
01:35:20,443 --> 01:35:21,653
Will you try again?
1307
01:35:26,115 --> 01:35:28,868
The question is "Will we try again?"
1308
01:35:30,161 --> 01:35:31,955
This was ours.
1309
01:35:34,165 --> 01:35:37,168
Yes, I think maybe Robert wants to go home.
1310
01:35:39,295 --> 01:35:41,422
So, I don't... I don't know.
1311
01:35:44,842 --> 01:35:46,970
Does home call, Dr. Fred?
1312
01:35:48,179 --> 01:35:50,723
I don't really have a home any more.
1313
01:35:52,183 --> 01:35:54,394
There was a moment
when I had everything, but...
1314
01:35:55,687 --> 01:35:58,147
Well, now I don't know what to do.
1315
01:36:01,818 --> 01:36:04,362
When the time comes, you will know.
1316
01:36:11,786 --> 01:36:12,954
Well, until then.
1317
01:36:40,690 --> 01:36:42,358
Thank you.
1318
01:36:46,362 --> 01:36:48,656
Just gonna say goodbye to Fred.
1319
01:36:50,283 --> 01:36:51,284
Are you sure?
1320
01:36:52,076 --> 01:36:53,494
Sorry?
1321
01:36:59,542 --> 01:37:01,085
Listen, Harriet.
1322
01:37:03,212 --> 01:37:06,299
When I was in the desert,
1323
01:37:06,382 --> 01:37:10,511
the only thing that kept me going
was the thought of you.
1324
01:37:20,063 --> 01:37:22,148
You don't owe me anything.
1325
01:37:23,858 --> 01:37:26,069
I want you to understand that.
1326
01:38:01,229 --> 01:38:02,480
So...
1327
01:38:04,565 --> 01:38:05,942
We're going.
1328
01:38:11,322 --> 01:38:12,573
I'm so sorry, Fred.
1329
01:38:12,657 --> 01:38:15,910
It was an extraordinary idea.
It almost worked, too.
1330
01:38:19,080 --> 01:38:21,582
I wasn't talking about the project.
1331
01:38:22,333 --> 01:38:24,460
No, I'm not sure that I was.
1332
01:38:28,631 --> 01:38:30,800
I never meant to hurt you like this.
1333
01:38:30,967 --> 01:38:32,301
It's not your fault.
1334
01:38:39,976 --> 01:38:42,103
I don't know what to do.
1335
01:38:43,312 --> 01:38:45,815
I can't help you there, I'm afraid.
1336
01:38:48,651 --> 01:38:50,486
Are you going to stay?
1337
01:38:51,821 --> 01:38:53,322
Stay for what?
1338
01:38:55,658 --> 01:38:57,160
There's nothing here any more.
1339
01:38:58,494 --> 01:39:02,331
Not you, not a single
fish left in the river.
1340
01:39:13,342 --> 01:39:16,304
Well, someone's gonna have to make a move.
Good luck, Harriet.
1341
01:39:20,349 --> 01:39:23,102
Dr. Alfred, look!
1342
01:39:31,194 --> 01:39:32,361
They're alive!
1343
01:39:43,873 --> 01:39:45,541
I'm going to stay.
1344
01:39:47,210 --> 01:39:49,045
I want to start again.
1345
01:39:50,213 --> 01:39:52,173
I'll do it on my own if I have to.
1346
01:39:52,256 --> 01:39:54,050
I'll start small, though, this time.
1347
01:39:54,842 --> 01:39:57,303
A different approach.
Just a few fish to begin with.
1348
01:39:57,386 --> 01:39:58,930
Involve the local community more.
1349
01:39:59,222 --> 01:40:02,350
Make it their project, not ours.
That's the way to protect it.
1350
01:40:06,896 --> 01:40:08,940
Do you need an assistant, Dr. Jones?
1351
01:40:09,524 --> 01:40:13,444
Well, I suppose I will.
I'm sure the sheikh has somebody that...
1352
01:40:15,112 --> 01:40:16,572
An assistant?
1353
01:40:19,659 --> 01:40:20,993
A partner.
1354
01:40:23,579 --> 01:40:24,622
A partner.
1355
01:40:28,251 --> 01:40:30,378
Yes, Ms. Chetwode-Talbot.
1356
01:40:32,088 --> 01:40:33,798
More than anything.
98257