Original subtitles

You call this an arrangement?

Everything is so dull.

Our reputation is at stake.

All the guests are just eating and leaving.

At this pace, by the time the ceremony starts, there will be no guests left.

How can you blame the arrangements for that, sir?

Did I ask you to invite boring people?

If your guests are irresponsible and don't care about your respect

How is it my fault?

The DJ is blasting his speakers

New, old English, he's got all kinds of songs

But it is your guests who have to dance, right?

This is neither a movie nor am I Ranveer Singh..

..to start dancing at your wedding.

Imagine how stupid I will look dancing over here.

The wedding got delayed because of the beautician.

Because at the last moment Pinky decided..

..to go for the platinum package instead of the gold one.

How is that my fault now?

We have planned everything according to the gold package.

Tell me if there is anything lacking in my arrangements.

Sir, we are running out of plates.

What do you mean?

Uncle...

Your relatives sons are standing right there.

I asked them to count before I placed the plates there.

It was you who thought that 700 plates would be enough for 1200 guests.

Others will only hog on snacks.

Now make them eat snacks.

Okay, don't look so distressed.

I will place some more.

But I will charge 400 per plate for these.

400 per plate?

What kind of a person are you?

I am charging you 400 instead of 1400 at the time of your need

If it were someone else, he would have charged 2000.

What now?

Sonu!

Sonu...

Sonu, Pihu...

Is she dead?

Why are you saying that?

I am already crying.

Did I make you cry?

You can at least stop me.

For what?

She'll just make you cry again.

She should make you cry, I should make you stop.

She should make you cry, I should make you stop.

She should make you cry, I should make you stop.

This girl has this vicious circle going forever!

There is a limit to being stupid!

We have been doing nothing but this since the past two years.

You started crying on the first month anniversary...

And you still haven't stopped.

She didn't do anything.

It is my fault.

What an-

What's your fault?

I checked her Tinder account.

You checked her Tinder account, that's the issue?

I apologized to her as well.

But she feels that I don't respect her privacy.

And that I doubt her.

Please talk to her.

You fool, why does she have Tinder account in the first place?

How does that matter?

Talk to her, please.

I swear, if you weren't my childhood friend..

..I would have disowned you long back.

How did you become such an idiot?

People become blind in love, not stupid in love.

I mean, how?

I don't even control myself as much as she controls you.

From your food, to clothes, even our toothpaste is of her choice!

We have been using Colgate since childhood..

..and now because of her "herbal" nonsense..

..my mouth tastes like mud all day.

She takes care of us.

Otherwise, you know how I hog at the shop.

That's grandpa's Kurta, isn't it?

Yeah, I flicked it.

It's nice, right?

Get more Kachoris (fried snacks).

Okay, sir.

It's very nice.

You should wear such Kurtas, grandpa types.

Why wear t-shirts?

They'll have good fit, make you look young.

Yuck!

Shouldn't we just eat Kachoris instead?

Listen...

Also get Jalebis (sweets) for him.

Okay, ma'am.

This is how she takes care?

She could have mentioned health or cholesterol.

She could have said that you'd get a heart attack.

But no, she isn't worried about your health.

She is more worried that if she's seen around with a fat guy..

..then her image will get ruined.

Hmm?

But it means the same.

There is way of saying things.

Those who have to take care don't taunt to do so.

She manipulates under the disguise of taking care of you, Titu.

She is not at all manipulative.

Don't make me say it.

I didn't want to go that way, but let's go there as well.

'Scoundrels, no one at the police station could find my uniform?'

'Shame on you!'

'Sir, you are the one who is naked.'

'Why should we feel ashamed?'

'Bloodshot eyes and an officer...'

He means... - Please.

I'm glad I don't understand.

She grew up in Jalandhar, right?

She attended college in Delhi.

Then how can she not know Punjabi?

She understands Honey Singh perfectly well.

But she scrunches her nose when it comes to Malkit Singh.

It is all a pretense, Titu.

I am telling you, she is a liar.

'You are wearing my uniform?'

'How dare a useless constable wear an inspector's uniform?'

'Why are you scolding me, sir?'

And that day...

Which day?

You know very well know which day.

Not that.

Don't go there.

Why not?

Because you know that I am right?

You will have to come along.

Come on.

Come on!

Hi.

Hey, hi.

How are you? - What's up!

Good, good...

My friend Sonu.

Hi, Anshul.

My friend Titu.

Hi, Anshul.

What's up!

And... how are you?

Not too bad. You were leaving?

No.

You know why a girl Introduces her boyfriend as a friend, right?

Don't say anything.

I am not saying anything.

Now her Instagram will do the talking.

Where are you in this?

Where?

Tell me.

Yeah?

Where?

Just show it to me.

I will shut up.

You have even given her the keys to the shop.

She also knows the code of the cash counter.

And she doesn't let you check her Tinder account?

So, what should I do?

What do you mean by, what should I do?

End it!

Call her up and ask her to return the keys.

I will change the code.

I should break up over such a small thing?

Small thing?

In two years, 24 months, 104 weeks...

She has made you cry for a 102 weeks.

What kind of a relationship averages one week of happiness per year?

We don't need it, bro we don't need it

It is not like that, Sonu.

Things will get better.

Look, I was hoping that you would understand.

But I have no other option.

I can only let you jump into ditches I can get you out of.

I waited for two years.

But not anymore.

I never wanted to do this in life.

But I have no other option to save you.

Think of it this way, it's either her, or me.

"Boy, you don't have to be the last one standing."

"Boy show me, you could be the one, one, one..."

"Look into my eyes... and come closer."

You wear high heels... and I am crazy about you."

"You make tall claims... prove it to me."

"Come closer, handsome."

"I wanna see you whine like Rihanna..."

"Get all the pounder, Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom."

"She burnin' up like the summer..."

"She'd tell me, I'm good at Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom ."

"You've got me like crazy."

"That you callin' me..."

"Nigga! Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom!"

"You've got me like crazy."

"That you callin' me..."

"Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom!"

"Totally crazy... Totally crazy, this heart..."

"Girl, I know you want me..."

"It was love at first sight for me."

"You know, believe me..."

"This is me expressing my feelings to you."

"You went behind my back and ogled others."

"You stole my heart and then stabbed me in the back."

"You talk a lot..."

"Let me explain."

"Come closer, handsome."

"I wanna see you whine like Rihanna..."

"Get all the pounder, Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom."

"She burnin' up like the summer..."

"She'd tell me, I'm good at Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom."

"You've got me like crazy."

"That you callin' me..."

"Nigga! Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom!"

"You've got me like crazy."

"That you callin' me..."

"Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom!"

"Totally crazy... Totally crazy, this heart..."

"Totally crazy... Totally crazy, this heart..."

"Oh baby, give me one more dance..."

"One more dance, one more dance."

"Oh baby, we can make it last..."

"Make it last, make it last."

"Give me girl, give me just like that..."

"Cause you're body's like a hourglass."

"To the left, to the right..."

"Everybody in the club... - Diggy-Diggy Bom Bom."

"I wanna see you, I wanna see you..."

"I wanna see you whine like Rihanna..."

"Get all the pounder, Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom."

"She burnin' up like the summer..."

"She'd tell me, I'm good at Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom."

"You've got me like crazy."

"That you callin' me..."

"Bom Diggy-Diggy, Bom Bom!"

"You've got me like crazy."

"That you callin' me..."

"Bom Diggy-Diggy... Bom Bom!"

"Totally crazy... Totally crazy, this heart..."

"Totally crazy... Totally crazy, this heart..."

"Totally crazy... Totally crazy, this heart..."

"Totally crazy... Totally crazy, this heart..."

Just yesterday, I told uncle that we wouldn't be able to make it...

We have a lot of work in Delhi.

We will come to Meerut after four days.

Now he'll censure me.

"You say you have work when I ask you to come down."

"And you come immediately when mother asks you to."

Don't drink at least on Tuesdays.

I didn't.

Did you get the lotus stem?

He informed me at night.

What nonsense is this?

Will it be right for Ghasitarams to take Haldiram's sweets with them?

Where are you going?

What do you mean?

No matter where he is going...

It'd never be right for Haldiram to take Ghasitaram's sweets with him.

You are getting the names wrong.

I am wrong?

You are wrong.

Tell papa.

He is talking about Ghasitaram taking Haldiram's sweets..

..and not the other way around.

Obviously.

Why would they take ours?

Theirs is better.

On whose side are you?

I am on your side.

We won't take someone else's sweet. - Right.

But papa is also right.

The quality of our sweets has gone down, hasn't it?

That's what brother is saying.

When did our quality deteriorate?

Your sweets were never of good quality.

It's the same.

Just as yours.

There was either no quality even then, or it's there even now.

Take that back!

Take it back!

Rukmani, I will shoot him.

You'd compare your shit with my sweets?

I used to make them with my own hands.

Confectioners of Mathura used to send spies to find out how our Pedas were made.

And those Alwar's...?

Alwar's shopkeepers used to send men with money to get our recipes.

Take that back!

Rukmani, tell him to take it back.

Otherwise, I will shoot him for real.

Okay, I take it back.

Yours was better but...

Better? The question of better arises when there's competition

Yours is... - Lalu...

Yes.

Put Haldiram's sweets in our box and take them.

End this topic now. Dinner is being served.

This is a limit.

Why don't we take chocolate pastry instead?

This is what was left to be said.

I will take chocolate with me to go meet my grandson's prospective wife?

Prospective wife?

Which grandson?

Titu, you didn't tell him?

Surprise.

See, I am doing as you said.

You asked me to get married, so I am getting married.

Are you nuts...

He isn't getting married.

He's just going to meet a girl.

There is a prospective match for him.

I met 19 girls before I met your mother.

But all of a sudden...?

You made only rice?

Where's chicken?

It's Tuesday.

How about cottage cheese with peas then?

You could have made something more appetizing.

Mr. Malhotra got a heart attack last week.

He was just 48 years old.

No oily food from today.

My stomach is acting weird.

Go for a walk?

Yes, let's go for a walk.

I too will join you.

He fed me chickpeas in the evening.

I am feeling heavy.

I will eat after I come back.

My stomach is upset as well.

Yes, of course, it is upset.

I know how you'd react if I had made mince meat.

Let me see how often your stomach get upset after you get married.

Stay.

Bro, I know you have needs.

But you don't need marriage to fulfill them.

Needs?

Have you lost it?

No, seriously.

There are hundreds of girls out there who don't want to be in a serious relationship...

And... just, you know, have fun?

How do you think I am surviving?

Everyone has needs.

Sonu, my darling, I know.

I am not getting married for sex.

Shall we change the cook?

We've already purchased a new washing machine and dryer.

I want to get married, not open a laundry service.

But why do you want get married?

I am of the right age to get married.

I feel I should have someone in my life..

..who would stay with me, love me, take care of me.

Someone?

What about me?

Am I not enough?

Don't I give you enough love?

My love isn't enough?

Don't I take care of you?

Will your wife clean your vomit every Friday and Saturday?

As if you do.

At least I encourage you.

Who holds your forehead?

Didn't I take care of you when you had fever in May?

I was to go on my third date.

I was sure to get lucky, but I cancelled and stayed back with you.

"I don't take care of you!"

What is it that your wife will give you that I cannot?

Except for one thing.

And I can arrange for that as well.

Just tell me.

But I am not getting married for sex.

Ghasite, talk to him. He has lost it.

We are still so young.

Who gets married at a tender age of 27?

Ghasite, support?

Forget it. How does it concern us?

He will be the one getting laid.

He will be the one buying a condom.

We just have to go there to get drunk.

I am not getting married for sex.

Then why are you getting married?

Because he is nuts.

Who's behind this shit?

Who found the girl?

They approached us.

How is that possible?

What do you mean?

No one approached for me.

As you are not my heir.

For someone to approach...

That hurt, Ghasite!

I'll leave something for you too in my will.

You still haven't made your will?

Listen...

No nonsense, no arguments, no fights.

I swear I'll use my sandals if anyone behaves badly.

Except for you two, mother will use her sandals for y'all.

Titu...

Ready?

Let's go already. - Let's go.

Hello.

Hi.

Hello.

Hi.

Have you tried our milk cake?

Only from your Delhi Branch.

I swear, I haven't tried such milk cake anywhere in Alwar.

Come to Meerut and try our Pedas.

Confectioners of Mathura send spies to find out the recipe.

Really? - Yes.

Sonu, are you a business partner?

Forget the business, these two are partners in everything.

He owns an event company.

Okay.

We will handle the formalities.

You go and talk to each other.

I was just going to say that.

Where are you going?

If he could have his way, he'll also accompany him on his honeymoon.

Mummy, they aren't going to get romantic on their first meeting.

And what will I do over here?

Let them spend some time alone.

You can join them later.

I hope your family is not pressurizing you to get married.

Why?

Then I'd say that I am not interested.

No, I asked them myself to arrange it.

Why?

You couldn't find someone on your own?

I had a breakup six months ago.

We were together for two years.

Then?

Sonu was convinced that she is wrong for me.

So he broke us off.

Sonu must be dying to know what we are talking about.

Who is elder, Sonu or you?

I am, around three months?

He was born in September and I was born in June.

I thought you were real brothers.

Best friends.

Since kindergarten.

Oh, he addressed aunty as mummy, so I thought...

We were in school when his mother passed away.

Our mothers were close friends.

Ever since then...

Uncle is alive hence, he doesn't address papa as papa.

I mean my papa.

We grew up in the same house.

He used to visit uncle once a week or so.

Then uncle shifted to Canada so the visits ended as well.

We stay together in Delhi as well.

Sonu didn't shift to Canada?

Leaving me alone?

Forget thinking, no one even bothered asking about it.

I'll go see where they are.

Relax, she won't kidnap your Titu.

Stay here.

When grandpa opened the shop uncle Lalu used to work there as a cleaner.

Then grandma started treating him as her brother.

Ghasita and Lalu uncle are like Batman and Robbin.

He stays with you?

Yes.

Grandpa and him drink every night at his bedroom's balcony.

He owns 7% of the company.

Technically company belongs to grandpa and uncle Lalu.

But it's grandma who rules the house.

Because grandma controls the cash.

All the cash is stored in her cupboard.

And she gives the keys only to uncle Lalu.

You can say that even my mother has never touched those keys.

Do you tell all girls where you keep the cash in the first meeting itself?

You like kids a lot ?

Hmm.

I never had the motivation to make a lot of money.

I just intended on being happy in what I do.

You can open your NGO after marriage.

Why?

Do you mind if I have a job after marriage?

And what do you mean by after marriage?

Aren't you going too fast ?

That's why Sonu is always so worried.

Are you going to say no ?

Go with them

Lalu? - Yes, sister?

Send someone to Delhi.

Start getting information from all the shops near their house.

I have already found out.

No one smokes, neither openly nor stealthily...

Hiding from the wife.

Isn't NGO a place where they first rescue dogs and then sell them?

Not all NGOs deal with dogs.

She works for a children's NGO.

Mrs. Renu had told us.

We only heard NGO.

Did you have a private word with Mrs. Renu?

Isn't she too slim?

It gets problematic while delivering a child.

We are confectioners.

We will make her fat before we make her pregnant.

We will make her means?

Do you think before you speak?

We are confectioners means?

Do you think before you speak?

Mummy?

Don't you think she is too short?

Do you want to play basketball with her?

Did anyone see what car they drive?

I think Volkswagen.

What kind of guesswork is that?

It's not guesswork.

I am from a jeweler family.

We can remove biodata about a family just by looking at the necklace.

Car is such a small thing.

They own a Skoda.

I asked the valet.

When?

When you were busy greeting them.

Do you have anything to say now?

Skoda and Volkswagen are one and the same company.

They also own a Volkswagen.

That's Polo.

Volkswagen nevertheless.

How many friends does she have?

How would he know?

I mean Facebook friends.

It's on the internet.

How do you know?

He has a Facebook account.

900 friends?

Don't you think that's a lot?

Why?

I have 540 friends.

How many of them are boys?

Come on, mummy.

I am asking about Sweety's friends.

Come on, grandma.

She votes.

But how will we find out who for?

Yes. - That's confidential.

Oh my, it's confidential when it comes to her?

We always discuss before we vote.

Titu will feel bad but she doesn't have any style sense..

..in spite of staying in Delhi.

She is looking good.

I am talking about the mother and not the daughter, son.

Not even engaged yet and he's already fighting with his mother.

Who is fighting? I am just saying..

First, say the thing which is of utmost importance.

We have already said it.

What do I say?

What's there to say?

If nothing is wrong then it is right.

Yes, we didn't find anything wrong.

You say.

What do you think?

She's the first girl he has met.

So?

Where does it say that the first girl can't be good?

Are we shopping for clothes here..

..that we should go to a few shops before buying one?

Mummy, I mean, what should I compare it with?

Whom do you want to compare her with?

We aren't buying a car.

Tell us whether you like the girl or not.

What's there to compare?

I'll think over it and let you know.

Yes, think over it, discuss it and let us know.

We like her.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Rebound is having sex after a week in anger,

Not marrying after 6 months in sorrow

I am not sad, bro.

Then how did you get this idea?

You are the one who always talks about settling.

By settling, I mean, expanding the business, making more money.

So, this will take care of one department, right?

Marriage will cover 20 percent of the "settling" part.

Then we will make more money.

First, you stop smiling.

I swear, I will break your teeth.

Why aren't you giving an answer to mummy?

Are you?

When I seriously do not understand why you are getting married..

..then how do I decide about the girl?

Look, I know you are doubtful.

But I seriously think that I should get married.

Otherwise, I'll again fall for some girl.

She will make me cry and you will make me stop.

She will make me cry and you will make me stop.

She will make me cry and you will make me stop.

That irritates you as well.

I don't have any problem with that.

I will handle it.

I promise.

You can cry as much as you want.

What do you think about Sweety?

Who can tell whether a girl is the right girl to marry only in one meeting?

I mean there should be some compatibility..

..a chance to know each other better, matching wavelengths...

I hope you are getting me.

Of course.

How can you get married after just one meeting..

..because you didn't find anything wrong?

Correct, you cannot.

And you are all smiles these days.

You were better off crying.

But one can at least get betrothed, right?

People get betrothed so that they can know each other better..

..understand their compatibility, wavelength and everything else.

Is she good enough to get betrothed to?

She is okay.

Yes, mom?

She is good.

Say yes.

Yes.

Yes, okay.

Okay, bye.

"Restlessness I feel from the first moment itself..."

"What the future beholds I can't foretell."

"Why my heart is inclining towards you, I can't tell."

"New beginnings..."

"These are new things..."

"The darkness has faded away..."

"It seems."

"A new dawn, when I met you..."

"When I met you..."

"I found new air to breathe."

"A new dawn, when I met you..."

"When I met you..."

"I found new air to breathe."

"When I met you..."

"A new dawn..."

"Now my heartbeats travel as per your wish"

"When you looked at me, I felt alive..."

"Magical are your eyes."

"You are..."

"My world..."

"You are... the one my heart belongs to..."

"You are... the one my world revolves around..."

"You are... the one my heart belongs to..."

"You are the one who makes me aware of myself."

"A new dawn, when I met you..."

"When I met you..."

"I found new air to breathe."

"When I met you..."

"A new dawn..."

"When I met you..."

Can't you hear the violins?

Why would I hear violins?

They are playing so loud for me.

Listen carefully and you too will hear it.

You have confused me.

Why?

I don't understand whether ours is an arranged marriage or a love marriage.

Let's go, sister.

Rebound is having sex after a week in anger, you idiot

not marrying after six months if you are sad

What's this?

It's from home.

From Meerut?

Shall I send it back?

Set the table.

She is so cute.

Too cute to be true

What happened?

Spill it out.

You are so happy these days, Titu that its...

I don't know how to say it.

You don't like Sweety?

She is a case of too good to be true.

When you see a very good deal you get this thought in your mind..

..that something is surely wrong about it.

I mean the last time I saw such a family was in '96...

In the movie Hum Apke Hain Kaun.

That's '94.

It was in the theatres for two years.

I saw it again in '96.

Stick to the point.

Look, I am still not getting the right feeling.

A feeling is a feeling...

There is no reason or proof to back it.

Instead, I have only proof against it.

She works at a children's NGO.

She is polite to everyone.

She sends tiffins.

She does all the correct things.

But that's the issue.

She does all the correct things.

No one can be so perfect.

Something has to be fishy.

This is your motherly instinct for me.

Look, you have always got me out of shit girls have put me in.

You are being protective of me.

I am not saying it is wrong for you to get these feelings.

But this time the feeling that you are getting is wrong.

I think you should spend more time with Sweety.

I am telling you...

Once you get to know her, you'll feel differently.

I guarantee that.

It's just a bad feeling.

Are you seriously sure about this?

Because I am not at all convinced.

I am sure.

100 percent.

She is different.

You know every idiot in this world thinks his girl is different.

And after hearing you say that I am sure that you are so F.

Titu told me that you couldn't believe that he found such a nice girl.

Yes, I told her that you couldn't believe that she's actually so nice.

Just consider him lucky.

Like he had found such a good friend like you..

..he also found such a good girl for himself.

Do I look like a liar?

Whom will the husband tell if not his wife?

Is this something you share?

It's not the conversation but the people who matter.

Like I tell everything to Lalu.

Like you tell everything to Titu.

And Titu tells Sweety.

Everything is going wrong, Ghasita.

My feelings are getting stronger.

I don't know what to do now.

He is getting out of my control.

What you thought was a strong thread was just a weak string.

It broke.

And the kite is floating in the sky, Sonu.

Don't feel disheartened.

It will fall on Sweety's roof.

He will run and grab it.

Sonu is no less.

Wanna bet?

Sonu...

Should I bet on you?

Go ahead... pull my leg.

I am warning you, if they get married...

"I think you should spend more time with Sweety."

"I am telling you..."

"Once you get to know her, you'll feel differently."

"I guarantee it."

"It's just a bad feeling."

Who are you?

Babu? - Sister?

Sonu...

Okay, sister.

Make some lemonade for him.

Okay.

You met Babu?

Why is he here?

He's here for us.

I don't need him.

Even public toilets are cleaner than these.

We have a maid who cleans them..

..why did you call Babu for it?

What will he do the rest of the time?

What do you mean by what will he do?

Babu...

Call the plumber in the afternoon and get the flush repaired.

Send the bedsheets to the laundry.

And make watermelon juice for Titu.

What's the use of making so much money..

..when you are still living like in a hostel?

There has to be a quality of life as well, right?

What's your full name?

Babu... Jaidev Babu.

Your egg white omelette.

Who asked you to make you the omelette?

Sister.

Who asked you to make using only egg whites?

Sister.

He is her squealer.

Squealer?

A spy, you dunce!

James Bond.

She is M and he is her 007.

I am telling you.

Whom am I even telling!

Babu, where are my jeans?

They're still wet.

Why?

I washed it.

Who asked you to wash it?

Sister.

What is this?

Bread made from pearl millet flour.

Sister asked me to make it.

Sister asked me to do it.

"Hush-a-bye, baby..."

Babu, where are my shoes.

Sister asked me to do it.

But idiot, where are they?

Outside, on the rack.

Yes.

Babu... what are you doing, Babu?

Forgive me, please?

Babu... what are you doing, Babu?

Babu... no!

Sister asked me to do it!

Hey you...

Yes?

Whose t-shirt is that?

Mine.

Really?

Where did you buy it from?

Sister...

You bought it from sister?

Sister sells t-shirts?

You liar-

Sister!

What happened, Babu?

Brother wants my t-shirt.

I am so sorry, Sonu.

I found it with Titu's old clothes so I thought...

Return it, Babu.

Have you gone crazy?

You can buy a new one, Sonu.

I wasn't asking for it, I was just...

I am really sorry, Sonu...

I didn't think...

Babu, give it back.

I wasn't asking for it, Sweety, I was just asking...

Babu, I just asked you, didn't I?

You are just too much.

You made the poor boy cry.

Babu...

Yes, brother.

Can I have the remote?

Thank you.

Babu...

Can I have the other one as well?

Can I have some water, please?

Babu...

Hmm?

Babu... - Yes?

Babu... wake up!

Yes?

Can I have some salad, please?

Babu!

Yes, brother!

Can you help me wash it, please?

You work so hard, Babu.

You'll die if you keep working like this

You are so young.

There is something called quality of life as well, right?

Leave that and come with me.

Learn to relax a little.

Look what I brought for you.

Don't worry.

Sister won't find out.

You relax over here.

I'll be back.

Babu, porn? That too Bhojpuri?

Disgusting.

Sister, it is not what it looks like

I am being trapped.

I am innocent.

Hi.

Hi.

At least tell me that you have given her the house keys.

What if I was naked?

That wouldn't have told you when she is going to show up.

You should be doing it in the bedroom.

Is there a sofa here?

You have a bed!

I like sofas.

I want to do it on the sofa.

It's my wish I'll do it wherever I want to.

Then get the sofa in your bedroom.

22nd December, 27th December...

After that there's 24th February.

No no, why wait till February?

22nd October is fine.

Not October, he said December.

You said December?

I said October.

October. - October.

It falls on a Saturday.

It will be easy for everyone to attend as well.

It's perfect.

So 22nd October is fixed.

Good.

Offer sweets to everyone.

Whatever date it is, I just want everything to go smoothly.

Here, the date is fixed.

Have as much fun as you want with your friend.

You don't have much time with him now. - Congratulations.

Mom...

Then say it.

Why are you feeling shy?

What is it?

It's nothing, grandma.

She had thought of something but now...

Just say it Sweety.

Grandma, I had said that I'd hold a prayer function at home..

..when my wedding date gets fixed.

Then do that, dear.

We will definitely attend it.

Mummy, at 'home'.

Sonu...

Titu...

Make preparations for it.

What is it?

What's wrong?

Ghasitey, I am telling you, this girl is wrong.

Have you ever met such a sweet girl, such a nice family?

It's a sham.

Well I'm convinced it's a sham.

How can anyone trust anything about a person who praises our milk cake..

the way he did..that too of the Delhi Branch.

Right, Lalu?

Looked like cheats to me.

True.

Then why aren't you saying anything?

Why should I?

Who cares!

Everyone in this house thinks that they are oversmart.

Good for them.

They will learn a hard lesson.

He is your grandson.

That doesn't make me responsible for his life.

I taught him to earn.

Opened a shop for him.

I have done my duty.

It won't make any difference to you if a wrong girl comes to your house?

How would it make any difference to me?

It is my house, my money, my company.

And I haven't made a will either that she'd kill me.

And I won't let him eat anything she cooks before tasting it first, so...

What are you saying!

Look, we know that she is a wrong girl.

Even if she were right..

..it wouldn't have made any difference to us.

Now at least there is some scope of entertainment in the house.

Now the fun will begin when she has to pick sides.

Titu's grandma vs Titu's mom.

There were just two of them so far..

..so it was smooth sailing.

Now with three, groupism will start.

We know everything.

Don't bore us

Don't ruin our night.

Have a drink if you want to ,otherwise go to sleep.

Hey, you...

Close the door.

Rukmani, if even after 52 years you don't trust me..

..then I swear, all these years have just been an utter waste.

I am telling you, I don't have it.

I was just praying.

Untie your pajama.

Show me the pockets of your underpants.

I don't have it.

From the time you have made me take an oath...

I haven't even seen them.

He haven't even touched them for nine years after he pledged to you.

You consider him to be your brother.

Believe in your brother.

Lalu...

Sister?

Swear upon our bond, and say that he doesn't smoke.

I swear upon our bond, my sister...

He doesn't smoke.

The guest list has exceeded 2000.

Have you found a farmhouse?

What's the hurry?

It's not like the wedding is tomorrow.

Right, so we'll look for a farmhouse one day before the wedding?

Then you can talk to the decorator on the day of the wedding itself.

But we have such a nice farmhouse ourselves.

But it cannot accommodate 2000 guests.

Why are we spending so much money?

Let's invite only those relatives who will actually be pleased with our marriage.

2000 people will attend the wedding.

Out of them 900 wouldn't even know us,

And we wouldn't know 900,

We'll only be wasting money.

We will have to invite those whose weddings we have attended.

otherwise everyone will taunt..

..that we took the cheap way out on our turn.

And why are you getting worried about the money?

I had a word with your father that we'll spilt the expenses.

It's not about the expenses.

Who else do they have but me?

And who else do y'all have but Titu?

So whoever spends it, it's our money that's getting wasted.

Sweety and I have been discussing this..

..why don't we go for a destination wedding with a few close relatives?

Now that's a money saver!

You want to do a destination wedding to save money?

You will end up spending double the amount.

I am telling you, he will make you go bankrupt.

Destination weddings cost half as much in reality.

Shall I recommend a good event manager?

You can get it checked.

Your grandpa has made a lot of money and worked very hard to make it.

Titu's my only grandson.

This isn't going to be any small wedding.

You just think about what more we can do!

Do you want to drive off from the wedding in a Jaguar?

Sonu, check the delivery period.

Better idea, just give me the money.

I will make a fixed deposit.

Hahaha...

Such girls bring prosperity home.

Lalu...

Take another one percent.

It would be better if you take the other 7 percent back as well, Ghasitey.

I am going to tell the truth to sister today.

What's the big deal today?

We have been settling every lie with one percent since the last 52 years.

Take two this time.

You'll become a 9 percent owner of my wealth.

Two percent?

Mr. Ghasitaram...

This wasn't a small lie.

You don't have a sister!

You don't know the difference between lying..

..and lying by swearing upon the bond, Mr. Ghasita.

Does that chair belong to your father?

Is it your father's?

That chair belongs to Lalu!

Can you help explain to me the difference?

There is a difference of six percent!

Four... four percent.

Seven and four, settle on eleven percent.

It's an auspicious number too

That's better.

Hey you...

Move!

Come, sit.

Here.

Cheers. - Cheers.

It's all going wrong.

Here...

Go give it to Titu's father.

Reena... - Yes?

That's not how it's done.

What is this?

Bill... of the wedding agency.

150,000?

Yes, we took the platinum package.

They are good.

They match everything.

They find out about all expectations, budgets and then fix a meeting.

So Titu's wedding is through them?

Through them? Yes.

We took their package for Titu...

And Sweety's family too must have taken a package.

They must have seen the bio-data hence called.

What are you doing?

A joke.

I will frame it and gift it to Titu and Sweety.

Strange.

A joke?

Hello?

Is that Vivah's office?

I am calling from Ghasitaram's place.

Can we meet today?

Yes, sure.

Take this, we are getting late.

Take this as well.

Grandma, Titu is asking for fifty.

Lalu...

Get fifty.

"What are you doing?"

"Why have you forgotten Goddess?"

Grandma wants to talk to you.

"Why have you forgotten Goddess?"

Yes, grandma?

Sweety, Sonu is saying that there is a boy called Rahul who..

..you were earlier betrothed to?

Grandma... - Yes, grandma.

We were almost engaged.

You never informed us?

I thought the agency must have informed.

Rahul told Sonu some things about why it was called off.

What did he say, mummy?

He must've said I was too controlling?

That I didn't trust him?

That I used to check his messages?

After we got betrothed I learnt that he has a girlfriend.

Who he never officially broke up with.

For two months he kept asking me for time..

..and kept talking to her under the pretext of trying to break off.

He never asked for dowry.

Of course, because all of us are quite modern.

Who asks for dowry nowadays?

He just got it conveyed through the agency that..

..my parents would gift me a 'C Class' at least, as a wedding gift?

By their own wish.

Did he tell you what happened in Goa?

I got drunk, created a scene,

Embarrassed him,

pushed him so hard...

That it broke his arm.

He had taken me to Goa

Saying that even though it is an arranged marriage,

..he wants to propose to me in a proper romantic manner.

After two drinks, he thought he obtained permission to have sex with me.

He wanted to check our sexual compatibility.

Very important for a married life, apparently.

When I refused, he forced himself upon me.

Hence I pushed him.

Did he mention that?

This topic shall never be discussed again.

What happened?

Nothing, mummy.

Welcome. - Come, dear.

Hello.

Welcome. - Hello.

Yes, sure.

Hello.

All the devotees are welcomed here.

Come on.

"It is a very auspicious occasion"

"It is a very auspicious night"

"Today we offer our prayers..."

Titu...

She had told me in the first meeting itself

She said it was important that I know.

I didn't inform everyone because

Because it's our personal matter

You could have just asked me

I thought we have that relation

You doubt me?

Am I so bad?

You know, when we got betrothed, I told my mother that I found both...

A husband, as well as a brother.

Go get ready.

Hmm.

I must be the first bride ever to be waiting for the groom on the stage.

Sonu wasn't ready.

Is he ready now?

I am.

"Yo yo Honey Singh!"

"Hey..."

"Hey..."

"Listen to my last night's tale ..."

"I had some old red wine."

"My friends tried to stop me..."

"I shouldn't get pushy."

"Listen to my last night's tale ..."

"I had some old red wine."

"My friends tried to stop me..."

"I shouldn't get pushy."

"I met an angel..."

"She said, come close to me."

"Tell me, is your heart missing?"

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"It's lost in someone's eyes..."

"What do I do?"

"O madam, your gait..."

"Your silky tresses..."

"What more do I say?"

"I got inebriated..."

"What do I do?"

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"All guys and girls will mingle..."

"When they will go crazy and come to the dance floor."

"Everyone will shower money around..."

"And they will zoom and make videos of it."

"All my friends and cousins..."

"Let's celebrate the pre-wedding ritual..."

"A single heart I too seek..."

"For whom my heart shall beat."

"Many would form news relationships today..."

"Those who are ogling around."

"You too are eyeing me..."

"Tell me what do I do?"

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"It's lost in someone's eyes..."

"What do I do?"

"O madam, your gait..."

"Your silky tresses..."

"What more do I say?"

"I got inebriated..."

"What do I do?"

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"All..."

"All night, all liquor, I finished it all."

"If it's your friend's wedding, come party with me."

"Tell me quietly, who'd hide shoes?"

"Whoever does it will get beaten up!"

"We have to create a superb atmosphere."

"We also have to make all aunts and uncles dance."

"We will have a lot of fun."

"Get drunk, no one will say a thing."

"Girls get cajoled in a Punjabi wedding..."

"There is free flowing liquor too."

"As liquor is served, it lasts till the end..."

"The catering guy will be in trouble, my friend."

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"It's lost in someone's eyes..."

"What do I do?"

"O madam, your gait..."

"Your silky tresses..."

"What more do I say?"

"I got inebriated..."

"What do I do?"

"My heart got stolen..."

"What do I do?"

"Yo yo Honey Singh!"

I am sorry.

Why?

Because you think I am cunning?

No, I am... - Well, I am.

Are you thinking...

why I'm telling this to you now?

Just. I feel like showing you your place.

Go, run, and tell Titu...

Go.

What happened?

Titu won't believe you?

But you are his best friend since childhood, right?

And I have just come into your lives.

Go.

The engagement is done.

So will the marriage.

And guess who'll be the first person to get kicked out of Titu's life?

It's very nice.

Do you like it, grandma?

It's beautiful, dear.

Get it registered and start with the interiors.

Under whose name will the registry be?

Under a joint name.

What do you mean by joint names?

Yeah, Titu and mine.

I am leaving my house and my family to be with him,

The least I can get is a little security.

You talk about security?

You don't think there should be some trust on the family you are about to join?

Trust is a two way street, mummy.

If it's about trust then why don't we register it in my name alone?

Did you hear what she said?

They aren't even married yet and she is already talking about separation?

I always knew this family is the wrong family

Who talks about splitting the wedding expenses in the first meeting itself?

What kind of a family have you forged a relationship with, sister?

Titu is my grandson too!

I am not letting this happen!

Enough!

All property registries in this family have only seen one name,

Ghasitaram.

Go inform your father, that this wedding

stands cancelled!

What do you mean by joint names?

We've decided that our first home should be in the names of the people..

..because of whom this has been possible.

Ma and grandma.

You mean Ma and grandma will have to stand in the registry queue?

If they have to stand in the queue when we have uncle Lalu..

..then it's a shame, right, uncle Lalu?

The loan will get cleared on Monday,

We will register it on Wednesday.

Loan?

Grandpa, you have set up everything for us.

We wanted to build this house, slowly, with our own money.

What do you mean with your own money?

Who does this money belong to?

You've learnt to act like grown ups now?

Lalu...

Yes.

Make the full payment tomorrow itself..

..and have it registered under Sweety and Titu's name.

We have built a house not to see that my grand-daughter-in-law..

..comes in a house bought with loan.

Lalu... - Yes

Make sure Sweety doesn't have to go anywhere.

Yes

They are going to make the payment for the new house.

Ask grandma for fifty cash

Grandma, need fifty cash for the house.

Lalu... - Sweety...

"Tread slowly, Sweety..."

"Tread slowly, Sweety..."

"Don't move like a bullet."

"Tread slowly, Sweety..."

"Tread slowly, Sweety..."

"Don't move like a bullet."

"Twisty-curvy is the road."

"Your speed is on super fast mode."

"There is no brake on your sandals."

"Oh my God... oh my God..."

"Tread slowly, Sweety..."

"Tread slowly, Sweety..."

"Don't move like a bullet."

"This world is rude."

"Oh my.."

"This world is rude."

"They will tease."

"Don't run like this..."

"Listen to me, please."

Sweety... just a sec please

Hmm?

You've chosen the wrong battle

Well, the choice is made now

But it's a sweet battle.

No one can hear you

Why're you acting?

Acting?

What do you mean?

What are you saying, Sonu?

You can try as much as you want.

I promise you I'll break off this marriage.

What is wrong with you, Sonu?

Please say that you're lying...

That you're joking.

She is so cheap, Ghasitey,

She has started recording our conversations.

You do the same.

It is not ethical.

I can't forget my ethics for this.

There what would be the difference between her and me?

Come Sonu, Sweety has made curry for us.

Sorry, Sweety,

I brought kebabs.

Nothing beats kebabs!

Today I will make chicken for Sonu and grandpa

Oh!

They love it, don't they?

Absolutely.

Rukmani, you asked me not to eat meat on Tuesdays and I agreed.

But this is so not fair!

Lalu... - Sister.

Throw it.

But this one is already dead!

Will you let its sacrifice go in vain?

Lalu, you are under the oath of-

No meat will be cooked or brought inside this house henceforth.

Come on Manju, let's have dinner.

Well I... - Have an upset stomach?

I know where you go for your walks.

Quietly eat the dinner or else I will tell grandma..

..that bond she shares with her brother was traded for four percent.

Sweety has made Soya Chaap.

At least try it.

They call it veg mutton.

At Mayur Vihar, a boy promised a girl to get married, and had sex with her

But didn't marry her.

So?

He's in jail now

Under section 375 it is punishable offence to..

..have sex by giving a false promise of marriage.

Why are you telling me that?

Just.

It was in the news.

Yes!

You will lose.

Excuse me.

I will be right back.

Where are you going?

Inside.

There is hardly any time left for the wedding

Don't do it

What if she objects?

Have you lost your mind?

I am just...

I'm not going that far.

Relax...

What happened?

I don't know.

I don't know what happened to me.

What will she think of me now?

It's okay.

It's okay.

I know we decided to wait but it's us.

I am already your wife, right?

We just make it official on 22nd October.

I am sorry.

Are you mad?

I love you.

I love you too.

Now go and get ready.

Drop me home.

I am not the heroine...

I am the villain.

Villain.

"I am not the hero, I am the villain!"

"I am cruel and vicious."

Ghasitey, she's won me over.

What is wrong with him?

He is in shock.

She made Titu do what she wanted him to do.

And she made him do it in such a way that Titu thinks he did it.

And Titu thinks that what he did, is wrong.

Then to make Titu apologize, she first forgave him.

And when Titu started to apologize, she even stopped him from doing that.

Hats off to that girl.

We should be taking lessons from her.

This woman is the greatest manipulator.

She deserves it, Ghasitey.

Let her get married.

What do you mean let her?

I am not stopping her.

You cannot stop her either.

I don't want to either.

You're not even capable of it.

Lalu... how old are you?

68.

You couldn't pull it for 28, kid

I underestimated her.

Now I don't know how to prove it.

Look...

When you are losing the race, it is better if you pretend to fall..

You get an excuse for your failure.

You should back off.

Atleast you will be able to console yourself..

..that if you had fully tried, you could have broken off their marriage.

Here...

No ice, sore throat.

Have it, you will feel better.

Poison fights poison.

Titu, where is your passport?

Right here, why?

We are going to Amsterdam.

Not even 10 days left for the wedding

They want to go to Amsterdam.

This isn't a discussion.

I am informing everyone.

Everything will be arranged.

No one is going anywhere.

The band is not finalized.

Titu hasn't done the final trial for his wedding outfit.

Mummy, forget Meerut, even if I bring the best band in India..

..they too will play just that one song on repeat.

"This country of young brave men..."

And I promise that the groom won't show up in his knickers.

I will have a tailor on location.

He has been possessed.

I have agreed to everything till now

But this is non negotiable

I am not letting Titu get married without a bachelor's party

Sweety, you tell them, don't we deserve a bachelor party?

How can I refuse?

I am stealing your friend away from you.

I have to give you at least that much.

Sweety...

I am mailing you the itinerary.

You'll book the tickets for this, right?

They have hardly faced the real world

They are only kids

They have just aged a little.

They've never been to Bangkok,

I hope they don't go overboard in Amsterdam.

There's hardly any days left for the wedding.

Are you understanding?

Yes, I am.

Lalu...

Yes

Get your passports.

You too will go with him.

But there is a lot of work to be done here as well

Let him go alone

I can smell it burn

Right.

You stay back then.

Your medicines?

Write them down for him.

And outside food...?

It's Europe, Lalu.

Even outside food is healthy there

Yes.

You want to go?

Yes.

Then stop the drama.

Okay, sister.

Hey, you!

Come.

We fly business.

Go.

Hi!

Hi.

Congrats.

For?

For?

Forgotten as soon as you reached Amsterdam?

Sonu told me that you're getting married.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Thanks.

So, what's her name?

Sweety Sharma.

Already Sharma?

No, she is also a Sharma.

I mean from before.

From before!

Perfect.

What are you doing here?

Holiday!

With whom?

I've come alone.

Excuse me.

I've come alone.

I've come alone!

It's not a sad statement.

You're supposed to look happy

I've come alone!

What happened?

Stop crying, Pihu. What if Titu sees you

What do you mean stop it?

It's not a tap!

It's just happening!

Look, if you cry he will think that you still have feelings for him.

But I do.

That's why I am here.

Yes, but he cannot know that.

You need to show him that you have moved on.

Only then will he spend time with you.

Look, be it a girl or a boy..

..one feels sad about losing their ex only upon seeing them happy.

Only then do you feel like getting him back.

Try to understand.

He is happy with Sweety, Sonu.

I saw it in his eyes.

And I am here dancing in a backless dress for no reason!

Hey, listen, calm down.

Does anyone know Titu better than me?

He still loves you.

He's getting married in a rebound.

And he doesn't realize it either.

I've always believed that you and Titu are made for each other.

And it just got confirmed when I saw him with Sweety.

And the way he looked at you today...

I was sure that if Titu belongs to a girl, that girl is Pihu!

Please don't get distracted.

Let me strategize this.

You stay in your character.

I brought you here, right?

I guarantee you that I'll get you Titu.

I promise.

Just do as I say.

Got it?

Now wipe your tears...

And come two minutes after me..

..and say that you had got a call from Anshul.

Who's Anshul?

The guy from your office.

I don't see the connection

Again?

You won't get Titu like this.

You won't be able to do this if you over think.

You want Titu, right?

Then follow me.

Huh...follow...

Come after two minutes.

Did you see her anywhere? - No.

Two shots, please.

I think she got a little uncomfortable upon seeing me.

Sorry, had to attend a call.

Boyfriend?

Anshul.

Y'all have met him too

Oh yes, at the pub, right?

Shots!

My song!

Now just get drunk and make a mess!

I'll handle the rest.

They're crooks, mixing water in the drinks

8 shots down, haven't even started to feel drunk

And now you're a method actor

Can't even pretend to be drunk

He's looking here

Shall I call him?

Not yet, wait.

Now. Call him.

Drag him here.

You are getting married.

Come on.

What is this?

Poison.

You told me remember

That only poison fights poison

How is this poison better than that poison?

I have tasted this poison.

And even spewed it out when needed.

And most importantly Ghasitey

She never challenged me.

Come on, let's go.

Ghasitey didn't like this place. We're leaving.

Shots! Shots!

No!

She's coming with us?

You want to leave her alone in this state?

I mean it's your call.

I can tell her not to come if you feel uncomfortable.

Titu... Titu...

Titu... Titu...

Just a moment...

Titu...

Good night.

Good night.

Titu, you are so sweet. - Okay.

Go to sleep.

Good night.

Yes, Sweety?

Sonu? - My Sister-in-law!

Titu is at his bachelor party.

He cannot take your call.

Give it to me.

No phone calls for the next three days.

Don't you worry.

I took good care of him before you showed up, didn't I?

I can do that for another three days too

Bye.

No phone calls for the next three days.

"She has long silky hair."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"She has an awesome tattoo on her waist."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"She has long silky hair."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"She has an awesome tattoo on her waist."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"I fell for you, how is it my fault?"

"You are my love, how is my fault?"

"What do you feel about me?"

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"Your attitude is worth millions."

"Your swag is out of this world."

"She's causing a storm in the club."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"She has long silky hair."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"Why don't you open your heart for me?"

"Why don't you say sweet nothings to me?"

"Why don't you...?"

"Why don't you open your heart for me?"

"Why don't you say sweet nothings to me?"

"She is still a mystery for me."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

"She has long silky hair."

"Who's that girl dancing there?"

"Who's dancing there?"

Done packing?

Yes, done.

I really had a great time.

Me too.

Liar.

I ruined your party.

You got stuck with your ex at your bachelor's.

Didn't even get to do anything.

I didn't want to do anything.

But I just feel weird that Sweety doesn't know

You didn't tell her?

Sonu has my phone since the past three days.

But I think she'll be fine.

So what will you tell her?

That we are friends now?

What are you two talking about?

This scoundrel says that we are friends now.

He is getting married... and hasn't even invited me for it

And he says that we are friends

What are you saying?

Who is he to invite you?

I am inviting you,

Please be my guest

Only you love me truly!

Okay then, I'll go and pack

Have you lost it?

What?

Why would you invite her?

The way she said it, did I have a choice?

But why are you worried?

Tell me the truth...

Do you still have feelings for her?

Are you mad?

It just feels a little odd.

Look, if you have no feelings for her then you shouldn't have a problem

But if you have a problem, then that means that you have feelings.

You decide.

I can ask her not to come, but...

Let her come.

As you wish.

Sweety, you! Here!

What a surprise!

Sweety, Pihu.

A very old friend of Titu's.

I know.

Titu told me

Hi.

We bumped into her,

She was coming back to Delhi, so I invited her for the wedding.

Hi, I am Shalu, Sweety's cousin. - Pihu. Hi.

Shall we?

Come, Titu.

Sister-in-law Pihu-

Sister, how are you?

How are you, Babbu? - Fine.

How is you mother-in-law?

Good.

Good.

Keep it in.

Come on...

Get the bags.

"Go for it!"

"Punjabi!"

You had made tall claims before leaving.

"I'll do this! I'll do that!"

Where's your tailor?

Grandma was right.

You only know how to ruin weddings.

Isn't that her?

Who?

When did you meet her?

I have Facebook too

What is she doing her?

We bumped into her,

She was coming back to Delhi,

Titu invited her for the wedding.

Every half an hour mummy gets these dhols started

Even the Ghazal night yesterday became a Bhangra night

What?

Mummy!

Who is she?

Pihu.

OH!

Who is she? - What?

Who is she?

She's Titu and Sonu's friend.

Is she single?

Titu, my bag. - Grandma...

Grandma, Pihu.

An old friend of ours.

We bumped into her,

She was coming back to Delhi,

So we invited her for the wedding.

Very good.

She is a very nice girl.

You will be staying with us, right?

Yes, I mean... - Stay with us.

Okay.

I have a dance performance on the musical night

You teach me.

Just dance, grandma?

You should hear her sing.

She is an amazing singer.

Oh.

"This... this is a world of brass..."

"This is a world of brass..."

"And I am a golden baby doll."

"I am a golden baby doll."

"I am a golden baby doll."

Oh.

"I am a golden baby doll."

I'll get you some water.

Yes, dear.

Grandma... - Hey.

Come, I'll show you your room.

Oh! I'm soo exhausted

Have you lost your mind, Titu?

Who invites his ex-girlfriend for his wedding?

How will Sweety's family react when they find out?

I didn't... - She cannot stay here.

If Titu doesn't have a problem, why are you...

Does Sweety know?

Know what?

That she is his ex?

Of course she knows.

He never hides anything from Sweety.

Titu may not have a problem but Sweety can

Oh.

Sweety.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

Mummy feels that you might have a problem with Pihu staying here.

Not at all, mummy.

Happy?

They have already become friends.

Do you think that Titu still has feelings for Pihu?

"She's a golden baby doll."

"She's a golden baby doll."

That sari was looking good on you.

I never wore one after the betrothal.

So I thought I should...

Then why did you change?

Uncomfortable.

Should I ask Pihu not to stay here?

What if she agrees?

Why?

No chance.

Uncomfortable?

Are you?

No.

She'll look weak if she agrees

Then why will I be?

Go and change.

Why?

Go.

Okay.

Hey...

Where to?

Shopping.

I can't wear my Amsterdam clothes at the wedding

Come on, sister-in-law.

Oh!

Can I ask you something?

Hmm.

What's the difference between Sweety and me?

Does she love you more?

Does she take better care of you?

Why do you ask?

Just.

Just want to know

What is it I did, or what it is I did not do,

That it's her name on the wedding card instead of mine

How've you been?

I hate doing this.

But we will do it. - Sure.

Hold on.

Let me know if anyone needs anything,

Titu's near home

Can he go to Sarojini?

Why not, auntie? Of course he can

I'll message the address,

I have to get a dressed picked up

I'm sending you an address. Pick up a dress

If he is going to Sarojini then CP is right next to it,

Hop skip and jump

Tell me, what do you want?

I feel like having Wenger's pastry.

It's the best.

Write down what everyone wants and give me

Sweety, do you want anything?

Titu-Pihu are close to home

Titu-Pihu can get it

Titu knows what I like from there.

Aunt's mobile phone was given for repair in Karol Bagh

Ask them to get that as well

Titu, aunt's mobile phone is given for repair in Karol Bagh

Get that as well

And wait, let me ask dad as well

Sweety...

Strolling in the garden?

So late in the night?

That too all by yourself?

Has Titu still not returned?

Oh.

HeenaGulati91 says, best couple ever.

I totally agree with Heena.

Do you have any kohl?

There are just 48 hours left

Try convincing as many people as you can to agree with Heena

I just need to convince one

Where have you been, Titu?

Sweety has been waiting for you

She didn't even eat

Go have dinner with her first

One more bite and he'll burst

She eats more than me

She even ate from the parcel

I hope she didn't eat my pastry.

Your pastry?

Sorry, it wasn't mentioned in the message

Can you carry my bags to my bedroom?

Yes, let's go to sleep.

We have to get up early morning tomorrow.

Good night.

Good night.

"These troublesome bangles won't stop clinking today."

"My wrist will stay out of reach."

"You won't be able to hold them."

"These troublesome bangles won't stop clinking today."

"My wrist will stay out of reach."

"You won't be able to hold them."

"You have your attention focused at me."

"I look ravishing today."

"You insist on dancing only with me."

"You have your attention focused at me."

"I look ravishing today."

"You insist on dancing only with me."

"Hey drunkard..."

"We are inviting trouble today."

"We swing a little to the beats of the drum with the group."

"My moves are a hit, beloved..."

"My moves are a hit, beloved..."

"They fit well to the beats of your drums."

"My moves are a hit, beloved..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"I am called a beauty queen here."

"I am up to date with the latest fashion."

"My dresses are imported."

"I am here to steal hearts."

"Whenever you praise me, I feel a little shy, beloved..."

"My moves..."

"My moves are a hit, beloved..."

"My moves are a hit, beloved..."

"They fit well to the beats of your drums."

"My moves are a hit, beloved..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

"Your moves are a hit, dear..."

Why did you break up with me?

My being in Amsterdam was no coincidence

Sonu called me there.

He said:

"Titu was depressed for months after breaking up with you

Then he agreed for an arranged marriage

He still loves you.

You and Titu make a perfect couple

I promise to get Titu back to you

You just follow me.

And I, like a fool, just to see my name on the wedding card...

...kept agreeing with everything he said.

He said Sweety is the wrong girl, and I believed him.

He said Titu is unhappy with her, and I believed him.

He said Titu still loves you, and I believed him.

I am such a fool.

The same person who took you away from me..

..promised to help me get you back, and I believed him.

I am stupid, I am selfish too,

But I am not a wretch.

Titu, I know what this looks like, but I had no other option.

You don't know her. She is playing a game.

She accepted that herself, on the day of your engagement-

And what do you think, whatever...

I am getting married tomorrow

You're invited for drinks

"If you stay upset... then who would smile?"

"If you go... then who would stay back?"

"When you stay quiet, I feel scared..."

"Who would claim me as his own, now?"

"If you stay upset... then who would smile?"

"If you go... then who would stay back?"

"When you stay quiet, I feel scared..."

"Who would claim me as his own, now?"

"You are the reason..."

"Without you, I am useless, without a cause."

"I am your best friend."

"I am your best friend."

I feel so strange.

I know I'm getting married...

But today...

You know to think that it's happening today...

I've just been smiling since the time I woke up

You are happy, aren't you?

I am getting married today

I just want everyone to be happy

I was wondering what to do with your room

I mean I knew you'd be kicked out...

...just didn't know it would happen so soon

We were in school

There was a boy who used to trouble Titu a lot

Every day he'd sit behind Titu and poke him with a pencil

Titu would cry a lot

One day I sat behind that boy

And as he was about to sit, I put a compass below him

That boy cried a lot,

Complained to the teacher,

I was severely beaten up

But after that day, no one in school dared to trouble Titu

Titu tells you everything, right?

You know everything?

You know everything Titu tells you

I know everything that Titu doesn't even tell himself

You haven't spent as many months with him..

..as I've spent years

I've always kept him safe from people like you

My Titu is naïve,

gets influenced quite easily,

then doesn't understand any reasoning

That's why I have to resort to such methods

It is actually my fault

I started trying to defeat you

I'd forgotten that it was never about defeating you, it was about saving Titu

And if it's about saving Titu, then come what may

You will not get married tonight

I swear by my life.

You can try,

But let me warn you,

Between a friend and a girl,

The girl always wins.

What's your plan now?

No more plans, Ghasitey

Wait, let me sort this nonsense

No, Ghasitey

If you have to sort, then there's nothing left to sort

She warned me...

That between a friend and a girl,

The girl always wins

So now either the friend will make me win

Or else...

Like others, even Sonu and Titu will meet once in three months...

Call each other on birthdays...

Get drunk and tell tales of their friendship...

"It's my best friend's wedding today."

"It's my best friend's wedding today."

"It's my best friend's wedding..."

"Come, let's fight over toys again."

"You can win, I will lose."

"Come, let's be mischievous again."

"You can run away, I will stay to get beaten up."

"Even your abuses sound sweet."

"I am all ears for them."

"I am your best friend."

"I am your best friend."

"I am your best friend..."

"It is the time to celebrate."

"It is an auspicious occasion..."

"Music will play, buddies will dance..."

"It's time to congratulate."

"I am dancing with joy."

"I keep my tears at bay."

"Old relations don't fade away..."

"When new relations are formed."

"If I am leaving, then let me go."

"Why are you upset that I am leaving?"

"Why fix what's broken?"

"Why did you turn towards me?"

"You have no right to say..."

"That we are no longer friends."

"It's only of your friendship..."

"That I have a right over, forever."

"I am your best friend."

"I am your best friend."

"I am your best friend."

"I am your best friend."

"I am your best friend."

To heck with her truth and to heck with my lies

It's as simple as this Titu

It's either her, or me.

You have two options

Either believe that I am telling the truth...

And then keep thinking all your life that maybe he was right

Or believe that he is telling the truth...

And then keep thinking all your life that I was right

We were 13 when auntie passed away,

I didn't move from Sonu's side for three days, as he hadn't cried...

I couldn't not be with him when he did

The fourth day he cried, in my arms

Kept on crying

For three hours straight

I locked the door so no one else could come in

Then he cried himself to sleep

Since that day, I've never seen a tear in his eyes, come what may

You may be true, and he may be lying

But if it is between you and him

I'll break your teeth

We'll die single this way.

What do you mean by "we"?

Why would I die single?

It's not me who always falls for the wrong girl

When did you realize that she is wrong?

She told me on the day of your engagement.

Then you should have told me that day itself

Would've saved us a few lakhs and a some respect

After twelve years, I had made sweets with my own hands

I almost booked a Jaguar

You don't say a word, Ghasitey

I fought all by myself

You were enjoying this

This is my principle of life

Never tell an idiot that he's an idiot

What's happening out there?

Lalu had given me two new notes of 500

I had fixed it for 22nd December and he got it changed to 22nd October

If you marry on them on a wrong date then its bound to happen

Here's the catering bill

The light bill.

Decoration bill.

And this is the location bill.

And here's another rough estimated bill.

Okay, but wasn't splitting part of the deal

Well so was a marriage,

Where's the groom?

You are being disgustingly rude.

I am being rude?

I am disgusting?

You disgusting, your father disgusting

Your entire family is disgusting

Even your sweets are disgusting!

Don't say a word against my sweets!

But please, try to understand

I... - Don't try to make me understand

Make your characterless son understand!

Hey!! How dare you call my son characterless?

You characterless, your daughter characterless!

I can see who is characterless! Look at the way you talk

Give the necklace back!

Did you leave alone or did everyone leave with you?

I don't know who left behind me.

How could I turn back to see?

Would've ruined the impact

I swear on God, God has stopped making good girls

Don't worry. I am there for you.

What do you mean?

Think I'm crazy to ruin my life with you?

I think I've had enough of this nonsense

I am 28,

I should find a nice girl and settle down before I turn 30.

Sonu, my darling, I know that you too have some needs

I am not getting married for sex

Why're you thinking of marrying at all?

He's an idiot

Idiot, at least tell me that...

I like sofas.

I am telling you Ghasita...

What a...

Not at all, auntie... ah mummy.

Send all the bed sheets... to the laundry.

Call the plumber in the afternoon and get the inside bathroom...

I am telling... you are protective...

One second, sir. one second.

Sir, dropped the Kurta.

One second, sir. The mike has dropped again.

Malkit Singh is...

Damn it...

Your Mother-in-law health... is not good.

I am sorry.

Just dance, grandma? - Sorry, sorry, sorry.

One more.

Tell me something... come again.

"Get me..."

"Get me..."

"Get me..."

"Serve me the drink I'm crazy about, get me tipsy."

"I'm a bad girl, I like whiskey."

"Serve me the drink I'm crazy about, get me tipsy."

"I'm a bad girl, I like whiskey."

"When I get tipsy, I tend to get risky."

"Serve me the drink I'm crazy about, get me tipsy."

"I'm a bad girl, I like whiskey."

"Come on girl, get ready."

"Country liquor served in an English bar."

"Come on girl, get ready."

"Country liquor served in an English bar."

"Let's swig small shots, baby..."

"Let's swig small shots."

"Let's swig small shots, baby..."

"Let's swig..."

"Put your hands up!"

"Put your hands up!"

"Put your hands up!"

"You downed a bottle in no time."

"Your scene is beyond any reasoning of mine."

"I know that you'll get a hangover, baby."

"That's why I carry lemons in pockets already."

"In a single shot, I wooed you."

"I took the risk of chasing you."

"It's bitter but it's true..."

"You should home be playing with a Barbie doll."

"This song has become A-rated now."

"Bottles downed by you, half a dozen."

"What's the use of living a sober life?"

"One should learn how to drink from you."

"There is only one way in which can reach paradise."

"Drink all you want because it's five bucks cheaper."

"Serve me the drink I'm crazy about, get me tipsy."

"I'm a bad girl, I like whiskey."

"When I get tipsy, I tend to get risky."

"Serve me the drink I'm crazy about, get me tipsy."

"I'm a bad girl, I like whiskey."

"You are shinning more than anyone in this party."

"I am drowning in your eyes as you are drowning in Bacardi."

"It's not a night to get drunk on your own."

"I noticed you are all alone."

"There are many girls here but no one is like you."

"Sitting here all this while, I have been reading your mind."

"What you need is country liquor..."

"That's why I am been trying to convince you."

"What?"

"Come on..."

"Come on girl, get ready."

"Country liquor served in an English bar."

"Come on girl, get ready."

"Country liquor served in an English bar."

"Let's swig small shots, baby..."

"Let's swig small shots."

"Let's swig small shots, baby..."

"Let's swig..."

"Yo yo Honey Singh!"

"Put your hands up!"

"Put your hands up!"