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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,855 --> 00:00:03,791 [music playing] 2 00:00:07,445 --> 00:00:12,445 Subtitles by explosiveskull 3 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:20,074 AmericasCardroom.com brings poker back Million Dollar Sunday Tournament every Sunday 4 00:00:23,379 --> 00:00:24,446 Trick or treat. 5 00:00:45,904 --> 00:00:46,738 [scream] 6 00:00:50,742 --> 00:00:53,843 Mom, why do we watch these movies? 7 00:00:53,845 --> 00:00:57,380 Maybe because we're not supposed to. 8 00:00:57,382 --> 00:00:59,549 And they're fun. 9 00:00:59,551 --> 00:01:01,953 I thought these movies were scary. 10 00:01:01,955 --> 00:01:05,756 They are... so scary that most people would 11 00:01:05,758 --> 00:01:07,893 close their eyes or run away. 12 00:01:07,895 --> 00:01:09,895 But we don't. 13 00:01:09,897 --> 00:01:12,330 When the shadows are dark, and the music is creepy, 14 00:01:12,332 --> 00:01:17,401 and you know you should close your eyes, we take a peek... 15 00:01:17,403 --> 00:01:23,743 boo!... and laugh because now you know. 16 00:01:23,745 --> 00:01:25,812 Know what? 17 00:01:25,814 --> 00:01:29,481 That you're stronger than anything you're afraid of. 18 00:01:29,483 --> 00:01:30,786 Pretty cheesy, Mom. 19 00:01:34,356 --> 00:01:35,923 I'm going to check in on Jeanie. 20 00:01:35,925 --> 00:01:37,156 OK. 21 00:01:37,158 --> 00:01:40,027 You two continue to scare yourself silly. 22 00:01:40,029 --> 00:01:41,129 Thanks, babe. 23 00:01:43,566 --> 00:01:44,733 Chocolate milk? 24 00:01:44,735 --> 00:01:45,568 Yeah. 25 00:01:55,947 --> 00:01:58,850 [suspenseful music playing] 26 00:02:28,347 --> 00:02:29,281 [muffled scream] 27 00:02:37,390 --> 00:02:38,258 Mom? 28 00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:42,698 No jumping out at me, OK? 29 00:02:46,735 --> 00:02:47,599 Mom? 30 00:02:47,601 --> 00:02:50,604 [suspenseful music playing] 31 00:03:10,359 --> 00:03:11,459 FATHER: Honey? 32 00:03:11,461 --> 00:03:12,295 Dax? 33 00:03:16,365 --> 00:03:17,364 Dax! 34 00:03:17,366 --> 00:03:18,101 [gunshot] 35 00:03:18,103 --> 00:03:19,836 Don't look, Dax. 36 00:03:19,838 --> 00:03:20,772 Don't look! 37 00:03:27,879 --> 00:03:28,712 [gunshot] 38 00:03:40,592 --> 00:03:43,662 [rock music playing] 39 00:04:14,495 --> 00:04:15,563 Easy boy, Karloff. 40 00:04:22,671 --> 00:04:23,703 "Blood feast." 41 00:04:23,705 --> 00:04:26,439 It actually sounds kind of boring. 42 00:04:26,441 --> 00:04:28,675 Boring? Come on, Sis. 43 00:04:28,677 --> 00:04:30,145 "Blood Feast" is a Herschell Gordon 44 00:04:30,147 --> 00:04:31,880 Lewis cinematic classic, OK? 45 00:04:31,882 --> 00:04:34,715 Blood Fest, the thing that I'm going to, 46 00:04:34,717 --> 00:04:39,121 is the greatest horror event of all time. 47 00:04:39,123 --> 00:04:40,122 It's gonna suck. 48 00:04:40,124 --> 00:04:41,991 Whatever, Jayme. 49 00:04:41,993 --> 00:04:43,026 DR. CONWAY: Dax? 50 00:04:43,028 --> 00:04:46,728 Will you come to my office, please? 51 00:04:46,730 --> 00:04:48,231 (MUMBLING) Hey, shut the fuck up. 52 00:04:48,233 --> 00:04:49,100 Cheers! 53 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:04,951 Hey, you, uh, wanting to see me? 54 00:05:09,056 --> 00:05:11,488 You know, I'm being interviewed on Network News 55 00:05:11,490 --> 00:05:12,224 tonight. 56 00:05:12,226 --> 00:05:13,124 It's kind of a big deal. 57 00:05:13,126 --> 00:05:14,393 I really want you to be there. 58 00:05:16,696 --> 00:05:18,264 Yeah. Yeah, sure. 59 00:05:18,266 --> 00:05:19,932 I... I'll, uh, I'll try to come. 60 00:05:19,934 --> 00:05:24,036 I'm going to be talking about Blood Fest... 61 00:05:24,038 --> 00:05:27,907 how I and my family are totally opposed to it, 62 00:05:27,909 --> 00:05:34,780 how no child of mine would ever set foot on those grounds. 63 00:05:34,782 --> 00:05:36,250 You understand? 64 00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:37,918 Mm-hmm. 65 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:39,987 Good. 66 00:05:39,989 --> 00:05:42,791 Then, uh, you won't be needing this. 67 00:05:48,764 --> 00:05:50,098 Wait a minute, I... 68 00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:52,200 look, I think I'm old enough to make my own decision. 69 00:05:52,202 --> 00:05:55,070 You live in my house. 70 00:05:55,072 --> 00:06:00,242 I don't understand this obsession with violence, Dax. 71 00:06:00,244 --> 00:06:02,810 Dad, it's... it's movies. 72 00:06:02,812 --> 00:06:03,878 I don't know what to tell you. 73 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:06,316 It poses as entertainment, but it's 74 00:06:06,318 --> 00:06:10,619 these kind of movies that drove my patient to kill your mother. 75 00:06:10,621 --> 00:06:12,721 How do you not see that? 76 00:06:12,723 --> 00:06:13,824 This isn't about her. 77 00:06:16,761 --> 00:06:20,097 Please, don't... don't do that. 78 00:06:20,099 --> 00:06:23,200 Blood Fest is a gathering of freaks and degenerates 79 00:06:23,202 --> 00:06:27,939 celebrating mindless violence and gore. 80 00:06:27,941 --> 00:06:29,707 ANTHONY WALSH: Blood Fest is the gathering 81 00:06:29,709 --> 00:06:31,709 of freaks and degenerates celebrating 82 00:06:31,711 --> 00:06:33,911 mindless violence and gore. 83 00:06:33,913 --> 00:06:36,114 It's going to be extraordinary! 84 00:06:36,116 --> 00:06:37,015 ANNOUNCER: Blood! 85 00:06:37,017 --> 00:06:37,615 Blood! 86 00:06:37,617 --> 00:06:39,717 Blood Fest! 87 00:06:39,719 --> 00:06:41,853 Legendary field producer, movie promoter, 88 00:06:41,855 --> 00:06:44,958 and lover of all things horrific, Anthony Walsh, 89 00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:48,094 invites you to run for your life! 90 00:06:48,096 --> 00:06:49,561 Blood Fest! 91 00:06:49,563 --> 00:06:52,165 ANTHONY WALSH: We've taken a 700-acre ranch in the middle 92 00:06:52,167 --> 00:06:55,668 of nowhere and recreated the most iconic 93 00:06:55,670 --> 00:06:57,804 of cinematic horror locales. 94 00:06:57,806 --> 00:06:59,806 Don't miss the biggest names in horror, 95 00:06:59,808 --> 00:07:03,177 celebrity panels, and the most outrageous parties. 96 00:07:03,179 --> 00:07:06,281 Recent additions include the Original Arborist, Roger 97 00:07:06,283 --> 00:07:08,916 Hinckley, the cast and crew of "Hell's Nest," 98 00:07:08,918 --> 00:07:13,021 and late night karaoke with Zachary Levi. 99 00:07:13,023 --> 00:07:16,657 Get inside the gates before sundown Halloween night. 100 00:07:16,659 --> 00:07:17,659 ANNOUNCER (ON COMPUTER): Blood! 101 00:07:17,661 --> 00:07:18,626 Blood! 102 00:07:18,628 --> 00:07:20,029 Blood Fest! 103 00:07:20,031 --> 00:07:22,999 Brought to you by Walsh Corporation. 104 00:07:23,001 --> 00:07:25,001 You've got to stop watching that. 105 00:07:25,003 --> 00:07:27,669 You're torturing yourself. 106 00:07:27,671 --> 00:07:29,305 We'll find another ticket. 107 00:07:29,307 --> 00:07:31,341 The whole thing has been sold out for months. 108 00:07:31,343 --> 00:07:34,244 Scalpers are charging more money than I have pores. 109 00:07:34,246 --> 00:07:35,278 Yo! Yo! 110 00:07:35,280 --> 00:07:36,380 Yo! 111 00:07:36,382 --> 00:07:37,880 Y'all see my Overwatch post? 112 00:07:37,882 --> 00:07:42,253 I hacked the game code, got all badass on ultimate skills. 113 00:07:42,255 --> 00:07:43,920 Three new subscribers. 114 00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:45,323 None of them relatives. 115 00:07:45,325 --> 00:07:48,192 Boom, boom, bah. 116 00:07:48,194 --> 00:07:49,526 Morning, Krill. 117 00:07:49,528 --> 00:07:51,062 I'm now ready to forsake my virtual multiverses 118 00:07:51,064 --> 00:07:53,898 for a weekend of Blood Fest. 119 00:07:53,900 --> 00:07:55,267 Plus, I think it's time that I find 120 00:07:55,269 --> 00:07:58,736 the extraordinary lady worthy enough to de-flower me, 121 00:07:58,738 --> 00:08:00,205 the Krill. 122 00:08:00,207 --> 00:08:02,207 It's mind boggling that no one has snatched you up yet. 123 00:08:02,209 --> 00:08:03,775 I know, right? That's what I'm saying. 124 00:08:03,777 --> 00:08:05,009 It's crazy out here. 125 00:08:05,011 --> 00:08:05,878 It's crazy out here in this world, man. 126 00:08:05,880 --> 00:08:08,348 Where... what... what... what... 127 00:08:08,350 --> 00:08:10,350 what's up with him? 128 00:08:10,352 --> 00:08:12,751 His dad found his wristband. 129 00:08:12,753 --> 00:08:15,121 You guys just go ahead without me. 130 00:08:15,123 --> 00:08:16,021 Maybe you should call Ashley. 131 00:08:16,023 --> 00:08:17,157 She could probably get you in. 132 00:08:17,159 --> 00:08:18,359 Oh, please don't mention her, dude. 133 00:08:18,361 --> 00:08:19,226 There's a "Hell's Nest" panel at Blood Fest. 134 00:08:19,228 --> 00:08:20,263 She probably has an extra pass. 135 00:08:22,298 --> 00:08:23,696 I... I... I can't... 136 00:08:23,698 --> 00:08:24,931 I can't believe... It's so wrong. 137 00:08:24,933 --> 00:08:28,402 Ashley Spats... Ashley Spats is at Blood Fest. 138 00:08:28,404 --> 00:08:29,770 And I'm stuck here. 139 00:08:29,772 --> 00:08:32,340 You know, Ashley who thought "Black Christmas" was 140 00:08:32,342 --> 00:08:34,276 a Tyler Perry holiday movie. 141 00:08:34,278 --> 00:08:36,777 You know, sh... sh... she refuses to watch "Seven," because she 142 00:08:36,779 --> 00:08:37,778 didn't see the first six. 143 00:08:37,780 --> 00:08:38,846 OK. 144 00:08:38,848 --> 00:08:40,348 She thought that "28 Days Later" 145 00:08:40,350 --> 00:08:42,318 was a... was a health doc about the fucking menstrual cycle. 146 00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:43,921 Dax, you're pitiful. 147 00:08:46,291 --> 00:08:48,957 Here's something that you really want, 148 00:08:48,959 --> 00:08:53,430 and you're going to let your dad stop you? 149 00:08:53,432 --> 00:08:55,399 He's a... he's a scary guy. 150 00:08:55,401 --> 00:08:58,168 Everyone's dad is a scary guy. 151 00:08:58,170 --> 00:08:59,769 Nut up. 152 00:08:59,771 --> 00:09:01,039 You were made for Blood Fest. 153 00:09:05,412 --> 00:09:07,811 Blood Fest. 154 00:09:07,813 --> 00:09:09,780 I'll call her. 155 00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:10,881 You happy? 156 00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:11,917 Yeah. 157 00:09:15,020 --> 00:09:17,523 That's what I'm talking about! 158 00:09:17,525 --> 00:09:20,024 Pow! 159 00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:22,095 [cell phone ringing] 160 00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:24,896 Dax. DAX (ON PHONE): Hey! 161 00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:25,663 Ashley! 162 00:09:25,665 --> 00:09:27,065 Long time no nothing. 163 00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,833 DAX (ON PHONE): I just wanted to congratulate you on 164 00:09:28,835 --> 00:09:31,338 your new movie, "Hell's Nest." 165 00:09:31,340 --> 00:09:35,007 Looks like it's going to be awesome. 166 00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:37,977 So you're... you're a... you're an actor in it, right? 167 00:09:37,979 --> 00:09:40,447 You're... oh, God... wha... wha... what are you... 168 00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:41,915 what are you playing again? 169 00:09:41,917 --> 00:09:42,983 Topless girl number four. 170 00:09:42,985 --> 00:09:44,918 Topless girl number four, that's it. 171 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:45,952 It's a key role. 172 00:09:45,954 --> 00:09:48,054 It's no topless girl number three. 173 00:09:48,056 --> 00:09:50,090 I'd kill for topless girl number three. 174 00:09:50,092 --> 00:09:51,325 Well, you're in a movie. 175 00:09:51,327 --> 00:09:52,460 That's awesome. 176 00:09:52,462 --> 00:09:53,661 You're making your dreams come true. 177 00:09:53,663 --> 00:09:56,265 Uh, if you need, uh, a ride to... uh, to... 178 00:09:56,267 --> 00:09:58,467 Blood Fest, you're more than welcome to, uh... 179 00:09:58,469 --> 00:10:02,371 Uh, I'm actually here already, you know, to emotionally 180 00:10:02,373 --> 00:10:03,871 prepare for the fans. 181 00:10:03,873 --> 00:10:06,509 I'm trying to find a way in. 182 00:10:06,511 --> 00:10:09,912 They have more barbed wire here than an S&M summer camp. 183 00:10:09,914 --> 00:10:12,881 Wait, Ashely, the... the reason I'm calling... 184 00:10:12,883 --> 00:10:13,749 What's taking him so long? 185 00:10:13,751 --> 00:10:15,218 Why doesn't he just ask her? 186 00:10:15,220 --> 00:10:16,985 I've known Dax a long time. 187 00:10:16,987 --> 00:10:18,556 He survived some hard stuff. 188 00:10:18,558 --> 00:10:20,823 And he's got his pride. 189 00:10:20,825 --> 00:10:22,193 Dax is not going a coward just so he can... 190 00:10:22,195 --> 00:10:24,495 Please, Ashley, just... just get me through the door! 191 00:10:24,497 --> 00:10:28,097 I'm literally on my knees begging you, look. 192 00:10:28,099 --> 00:10:29,367 That's me begging. 193 00:10:29,369 --> 00:10:30,468 Do you get it? 194 00:10:30,470 --> 00:10:31,168 Scratch that. 195 00:10:31,170 --> 00:10:33,137 He's cookie dough. 196 00:10:33,139 --> 00:10:36,006 Let's go to Blood Fest! 197 00:10:36,008 --> 00:10:37,942 SAM: Why all the rules? 198 00:10:37,944 --> 00:10:41,213 Freddy only kills in dreams, virgins survive. 199 00:10:41,215 --> 00:10:43,549 Michael won't just build a dirty bomb and kill them all. 200 00:10:43,551 --> 00:10:44,450 These rules. 201 00:10:44,452 --> 00:10:46,184 DAX: You've got to have rules. 202 00:10:46,186 --> 00:10:47,886 Otherwise, death would be random... 203 00:10:47,888 --> 00:10:49,921 just chaotic and meaningless. 204 00:10:49,923 --> 00:10:51,324 SAM: That's life. 205 00:10:51,326 --> 00:10:53,527 DAX: If movies were life, no one would buy a ticket. 206 00:10:53,529 --> 00:10:56,365 [music playing] 207 00:11:04,105 --> 00:11:06,274 ANNOUNCER: Blood Fest gates are closing in one minute! 208 00:11:06,276 --> 00:11:07,040 Come on! 209 00:11:07,042 --> 00:11:07,609 The gates are closing! 210 00:11:07,611 --> 00:11:09,044 Let's go! 211 00:11:12,549 --> 00:11:16,417 This is gonna be the best night of my life. 212 00:11:16,419 --> 00:11:17,386 SAM: Come on, Dax! 213 00:11:17,388 --> 00:11:20,957 [music playing] 214 00:11:53,327 --> 00:11:56,461 Please have your wristbands on and visible. 215 00:11:56,463 --> 00:11:57,663 This is so beautiful. 216 00:11:57,665 --> 00:12:00,064 It's like some twisted and horrific heaven. 217 00:12:00,066 --> 00:12:03,602 Tone it back, boys. 218 00:12:03,604 --> 00:12:05,237 Hi. 219 00:12:05,239 --> 00:12:06,106 Hey. 220 00:12:11,945 --> 00:12:13,245 Wristband. 221 00:12:13,247 --> 00:12:15,348 I'm actually supposed to be meaning someone here. 222 00:12:15,350 --> 00:12:16,081 Dax. 223 00:12:16,083 --> 00:12:17,351 Oh, she's right there. 224 00:12:17,353 --> 00:12:18,084 Whoa. 225 00:12:18,086 --> 00:12:18,719 LENJAMIN: Oh, it's cool. 226 00:12:18,721 --> 00:12:21,622 He's with me. 227 00:12:21,624 --> 00:12:23,089 Thanks. 228 00:12:23,091 --> 00:12:24,391 Ashley, you are a lifesaver. 229 00:12:24,393 --> 00:12:27,628 This is Lenjamin Cain, director of "Hell's Nest." 230 00:12:27,630 --> 00:12:29,128 He's why you're here. 231 00:12:29,130 --> 00:12:30,964 Thanks, baby. 232 00:12:30,966 --> 00:12:31,965 Appreciate it. 233 00:12:31,967 --> 00:12:32,835 Uh-huh. 234 00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:37,339 It's my pleasure. 235 00:12:37,341 --> 00:12:38,573 It's my pleasure to help out. 236 00:12:38,575 --> 00:12:42,378 Uh, babe, I'm sorry, but why is this fanboy 237 00:12:42,380 --> 00:12:44,012 getting in under my name? 238 00:12:44,014 --> 00:12:45,481 He's a friend. 239 00:12:45,483 --> 00:12:48,617 And besides, you did it for me, your little pooky pokey 240 00:12:48,619 --> 00:12:49,719 pooky bear. 241 00:12:49,721 --> 00:12:51,487 LENJAMIN: Oh, yeah? ASHLEY: Yeah. 242 00:12:51,489 --> 00:12:52,521 Rawr. 243 00:12:52,523 --> 00:12:53,255 LENJAMIN: Pooky bear needs a poke? 244 00:12:53,257 --> 00:12:55,625 I'm a naughty bear. 245 00:12:55,627 --> 00:12:57,059 Uh, OK. 246 00:12:57,061 --> 00:13:00,196 Uh, well, thanks very much for getting me in, Lenjamin. 247 00:13:00,198 --> 00:13:01,665 And congratulations on the film. 248 00:13:01,667 --> 00:13:03,232 Oh, thank you so much. 249 00:13:03,234 --> 00:13:04,401 It's... it's shit. 250 00:13:04,403 --> 00:13:06,637 It's the shit. 251 00:13:06,639 --> 00:13:08,071 It's the shit. 252 00:13:08,073 --> 00:13:11,007 I left out that article. 253 00:13:11,009 --> 00:13:14,177 I got to ask you to leave. 254 00:13:14,179 --> 00:13:15,112 I'm messing with you. 255 00:13:15,114 --> 00:13:16,213 Oh, OK. 256 00:13:16,215 --> 00:13:17,348 I'm messing with you. 257 00:13:17,350 --> 00:13:18,684 Yeah, you're going to love the film. 258 00:13:18,686 --> 00:13:19,451 When it comes out, everybody's going to love it. 259 00:13:19,453 --> 00:13:22,086 Ashley's great in it. 260 00:13:22,088 --> 00:13:23,522 - Stacked. - Really? 261 00:13:23,524 --> 00:13:24,590 We need to go. 262 00:13:24,592 --> 00:13:26,057 Namaste. 263 00:13:26,059 --> 00:13:27,559 OK. 264 00:13:27,561 --> 00:13:30,697 That was awkward. 265 00:13:30,699 --> 00:13:32,197 That's my balloons. 266 00:13:32,199 --> 00:13:35,568 [music playing] 267 00:13:35,570 --> 00:13:37,236 Clown Town? 268 00:13:37,238 --> 00:13:38,003 That's not even funny. 269 00:13:38,005 --> 00:13:39,706 We're not going there. 270 00:13:39,708 --> 00:13:41,039 We're going everywhere, dude. 271 00:13:41,041 --> 00:13:42,342 You don't like clowns? 272 00:13:42,344 --> 00:13:44,512 You know I don't like clowns! 273 00:13:44,514 --> 00:13:47,450 [music playing] 274 00:13:51,487 --> 00:13:52,422 Nice balloons. 275 00:13:57,828 --> 00:14:00,060 She's the one. 276 00:14:00,062 --> 00:14:02,631 She's the one I will lay with tonight. 277 00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:03,832 SAM: Lucky girl. 278 00:14:03,834 --> 00:14:04,566 Someone should tell her. 279 00:14:04,568 --> 00:14:05,603 KRILL: Why do you joke? 280 00:14:08,673 --> 00:14:09,806 Oh, my God... 281 00:14:09,808 --> 00:14:10,673 the Arborist. 282 00:14:10,675 --> 00:14:11,841 SAM: Whoa, he trimmed the beard. 283 00:14:11,843 --> 00:14:12,608 KRILL: Dax, you've got to go meet him. 284 00:14:12,610 --> 00:14:14,278 It's the Arborist! 285 00:14:16,246 --> 00:14:21,552 Roger Hinckley, you, sir, are the scariest man alive. 286 00:14:21,554 --> 00:14:23,654 Hey, check it out. 287 00:14:23,656 --> 00:14:25,489 I got a, uh, tattoo. 288 00:14:25,491 --> 00:14:26,590 Oh. 289 00:14:26,592 --> 00:14:28,057 Arbor Day? 290 00:14:28,059 --> 00:14:31,763 Between you and me though, part four is my favorite, all right? 291 00:14:31,765 --> 00:14:33,230 Never saw it. 292 00:14:33,232 --> 00:14:35,767 Part four? 293 00:14:35,769 --> 00:14:38,202 Never saw any of them. 294 00:14:38,204 --> 00:14:41,306 You've never seen any of your own films? 295 00:14:41,308 --> 00:14:44,142 I don't like scary movies, OK? 296 00:14:44,144 --> 00:14:45,310 It's too much gore. 297 00:14:45,312 --> 00:14:49,247 The sight of blood just makes me want to... 298 00:14:49,249 --> 00:14:50,651 I used to puke after every take. 299 00:14:54,623 --> 00:14:55,956 Wou... would it be too much to ask 300 00:14:55,958 --> 00:15:00,159 if you'd possibly do the Arborist catchphrase for me? 301 00:15:00,161 --> 00:15:01,162 Yeah. 302 00:15:03,130 --> 00:15:03,998 It would be. 303 00:15:08,872 --> 00:15:10,337 Hey, a big fan. 304 00:15:10,339 --> 00:15:13,273 I actually disemboweled you in a modded version of Mortal Kombat 305 00:15:13,275 --> 00:15:14,276 the other day. 306 00:15:17,180 --> 00:15:18,246 Um, dude, let's go. 307 00:15:18,248 --> 00:15:19,550 The kick-off party's about to start. 308 00:15:25,421 --> 00:15:27,689 Asshole. 309 00:15:27,691 --> 00:15:30,158 DAX: That was devastating. 310 00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:32,194 SAM: Never meet your heroes. 311 00:15:32,196 --> 00:15:35,698 It's always a letdown. 312 00:15:35,700 --> 00:15:37,165 This should cheer you up. 313 00:15:37,167 --> 00:15:40,168 [cheering] 314 00:15:40,170 --> 00:15:43,576 [music playing] 315 00:15:47,479 --> 00:15:55,921 Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one! 316 00:15:55,923 --> 00:15:57,523 [applause] 317 00:16:05,900 --> 00:16:07,467 [applause] 318 00:16:09,403 --> 00:16:12,337 I've got a question! 319 00:16:12,339 --> 00:16:15,775 Who wants some horror! 320 00:16:15,777 --> 00:16:16,778 [applause] 321 00:16:20,583 --> 00:16:25,586 Inside these gates, we have re-created all 322 00:16:25,588 --> 00:16:28,321 your cinematic scare-scapes... 323 00:16:28,323 --> 00:16:32,760 from summer camps to asylums to circuses! 324 00:16:32,762 --> 00:16:33,962 Clowns, not the clowns. 325 00:16:33,964 --> 00:16:37,966 Every monster or maniac to ever spill blood 326 00:16:37,968 --> 00:16:40,367 on the silver screen has been granted 327 00:16:40,369 --> 00:16:43,237 a portion of these grounds. 328 00:16:43,239 --> 00:16:46,474 And it's all for you. 329 00:16:46,476 --> 00:16:50,345 I want this man to adopt me. 330 00:16:50,347 --> 00:16:55,417 But children... children, we have a problem. 331 00:16:55,419 --> 00:16:58,520 Horror is dead. 332 00:16:58,522 --> 00:17:00,389 I mean, look around you! 333 00:17:00,391 --> 00:17:02,491 Our vampires glitter! 334 00:17:02,493 --> 00:17:05,796 Our zombies have become soap opera stars! 335 00:17:05,798 --> 00:17:11,936 Our slashers have grown dull and old. 336 00:17:11,938 --> 00:17:14,371 We put Freddy on a lunchbox! 337 00:17:14,373 --> 00:17:17,608 We put Lovecraft in a coloring book! 338 00:17:17,610 --> 00:17:21,545 We have overconsumed and overproduced, 339 00:17:21,547 --> 00:17:27,318 and we have taken what was forbidden, what was dangerous, 340 00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:29,423 and we have made it common. 341 00:17:36,296 --> 00:17:37,864 Wanna make movies scary again? 342 00:17:37,866 --> 00:17:41,367 [cheering] 343 00:17:41,369 --> 00:17:42,568 Wanna do it tonight? 344 00:17:42,570 --> 00:17:43,971 Yeah! 345 00:17:43,973 --> 00:17:47,710 Wanna make a horror movie to end all horror movies? 346 00:17:51,781 --> 00:17:53,782 Ladies and gentleman! 347 00:17:53,784 --> 00:17:58,720 I give you Red! 348 00:17:58,722 --> 00:18:01,958 [cheering] 349 00:18:10,835 --> 00:18:14,469 Let me introduce you to your new favorite nightmare, your 350 00:18:14,471 --> 00:18:17,708 dark id, your boner for blood. 351 00:18:17,710 --> 00:18:24,014 And if you come up on stage, he will kill you. 352 00:18:24,016 --> 00:18:26,415 Any volunteers? 353 00:18:26,417 --> 00:18:28,018 Uh, should I? 354 00:18:28,020 --> 00:18:30,487 You two girls, come on up! 355 00:18:30,489 --> 00:18:31,388 Wonderful! 356 00:18:31,390 --> 00:18:33,390 Give them a round of applause! 357 00:18:33,392 --> 00:18:34,158 [applause] 358 00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:35,392 Oh, my... oh, my god. 359 00:18:35,394 --> 00:18:36,460 It's... it's them. 360 00:18:36,462 --> 00:18:37,494 - It's them. - It's your soulmate. 361 00:18:37,496 --> 00:18:38,462 KRILL: Yeah! 362 00:18:38,464 --> 00:18:40,597 Don't be shy! 363 00:18:40,599 --> 00:18:42,968 You look beautiful! 364 00:18:42,970 --> 00:18:45,773 Ladies, meet Red! 365 00:18:49,409 --> 00:18:50,410 Oh. 366 00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,429 [cheering] 367 00:19:09,431 --> 00:19:12,599 That was amazing! 368 00:19:12,601 --> 00:19:14,601 That was... that was pretty good. 369 00:19:14,603 --> 00:19:17,673 [suspenseful music] 370 00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:25,679 So when do you start filming? 371 00:19:25,681 --> 00:19:28,150 Oh, we're already filming. 372 00:19:28,152 --> 00:19:30,687 [chainsaw starts] 373 00:19:32,556 --> 00:19:36,491 And the best part? 374 00:19:36,493 --> 00:19:37,594 This shit's for real! 375 00:19:43,969 --> 00:19:44,904 [screams] 376 00:19:56,448 --> 00:19:58,448 We gotta run now! 377 00:19:58,450 --> 00:20:00,218 Go! 378 00:20:00,220 --> 00:20:03,888 Welcome to Blood Fest, mother fuckers! 379 00:20:03,890 --> 00:20:04,655 Guys! 380 00:20:04,657 --> 00:20:05,925 It's special effects! 381 00:20:05,927 --> 00:20:07,759 All the blood is fake! 382 00:20:07,761 --> 00:20:09,929 What are you running for? 383 00:20:09,931 --> 00:20:10,865 Oh, shit! 384 00:20:19,975 --> 00:20:20,874 Hey guys! 385 00:20:20,876 --> 00:20:22,209 I'm running from the pigheads. 386 00:20:22,211 --> 00:20:23,210 Not the kind you think. 387 00:20:23,212 --> 00:20:24,211 Not the usual kind. 388 00:20:24,213 --> 00:20:25,813 These have chainsaws! 389 00:20:32,188 --> 00:20:33,187 Hey! 390 00:20:33,189 --> 00:20:34,489 Come and get it! 391 00:20:36,926 --> 00:20:38,125 No. 392 00:20:38,127 --> 00:20:39,260 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! 393 00:20:39,262 --> 00:20:40,161 No! No! 394 00:20:40,163 --> 00:20:41,031 No! 395 00:20:46,669 --> 00:20:50,005 And remember, there's no horror without hope! 396 00:20:50,007 --> 00:20:54,776 If you know the rules, you just might make it! 397 00:20:54,778 --> 00:20:57,781 The rest of you are dead! 398 00:21:05,824 --> 00:21:07,024 Everyone's going to the main gate. 399 00:21:07,026 --> 00:21:08,526 It's going to be a death trap. This way! 400 00:21:13,900 --> 00:21:15,101 [screams] 401 00:21:20,140 --> 00:21:21,639 DAX: I can't see a thing. 402 00:21:21,641 --> 00:21:22,840 SAM: Found a light. 403 00:21:22,842 --> 00:21:23,407 Oh! 404 00:21:23,409 --> 00:21:24,677 Oh my God! 405 00:21:31,986 --> 00:21:33,219 Did you hear something? 406 00:21:33,221 --> 00:21:34,452 Yeah. 407 00:21:34,454 --> 00:21:35,288 Besides chainsaws, death screams, and me 408 00:21:35,290 --> 00:21:36,991 pissing my fucking pants! 409 00:21:39,726 --> 00:21:41,261 No, there's something. 410 00:21:41,263 --> 00:21:42,762 It's over there. 411 00:21:42,764 --> 00:21:45,833 [suspenseful music] 412 00:21:51,106 --> 00:21:53,107 Wh... wh... wh... wh... wha... wha... what are you doing? 413 00:21:53,109 --> 00:21:54,175 You can't open that door! 414 00:21:54,177 --> 00:21:55,442 It'll be like a cat or like a rake. 415 00:21:55,444 --> 00:21:56,910 And then we'll all breathe a sigh of relief. 416 00:21:56,912 --> 00:21:59,414 And then something will pounce from the other direction! 417 00:21:59,416 --> 00:22:01,249 James Wan has made a career on that shit, Dax! 418 00:22:01,251 --> 00:22:02,216 Please don't! 419 00:22:02,218 --> 00:22:03,117 Shut up, Krill! 420 00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:03,850 Please! 421 00:22:03,852 --> 00:22:06,923 [suspenseful music] 422 00:22:18,936 --> 00:22:19,635 KRILL: See? 423 00:22:19,637 --> 00:22:22,871 I fucking said so! 424 00:22:22,873 --> 00:22:23,741 Ashley! 425 00:22:31,317 --> 00:22:32,682 No signal. 426 00:22:32,684 --> 00:22:33,850 How fucking cliche is that? 427 00:22:33,852 --> 00:22:34,784 Oh, my God. Oh, my God! 428 00:22:34,786 --> 00:22:35,719 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 429 00:22:35,721 --> 00:22:36,320 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 430 00:22:36,322 --> 00:22:36,920 Oh, my God! 431 00:22:36,922 --> 00:22:37,654 Oh, my God! 432 00:22:37,656 --> 00:22:39,622 And my vape's down. 433 00:22:39,624 --> 00:22:41,360 Perfect night. 434 00:22:41,362 --> 00:22:44,162 OK, let's calm down, and let's think. 435 00:22:44,164 --> 00:22:45,397 There's got to be another way out of here. 436 00:22:45,399 --> 00:22:48,666 The gate is locked, and the fence is electric. 437 00:22:48,668 --> 00:22:50,335 There's pigs with chainsaws. 438 00:22:50,337 --> 00:22:51,569 We're dead! 439 00:22:51,571 --> 00:22:54,107 Do you think the back gate is locked too? 440 00:22:54,109 --> 00:22:55,540 What back gate? 441 00:22:55,542 --> 00:22:58,378 Well, I got here early, and the doors were still shut. 442 00:22:58,380 --> 00:23:01,114 And there was this yellow warehouse 443 00:23:01,116 --> 00:23:02,848 thing with a back door. 444 00:23:02,850 --> 00:23:05,386 It was sealed shut, but some guy gave me this, 445 00:23:05,388 --> 00:23:06,819 and it opened right up. 446 00:23:06,821 --> 00:23:07,687 It's not going to open now. 447 00:23:07,689 --> 00:23:08,588 The whole place is locked down. 448 00:23:08,590 --> 00:23:11,824 Hey, this a crypto-processor. 449 00:23:11,826 --> 00:23:13,327 We use this on Doomlarp! 450 00:23:13,329 --> 00:23:14,294 Doomlarp? 451 00:23:14,296 --> 00:23:16,030 Jesus! Geek! 452 00:23:16,032 --> 00:23:17,032 Fuck! 453 00:23:17,034 --> 00:23:18,932 I can hack this. 454 00:23:18,934 --> 00:23:21,069 If you get me to the back gate, I'll get it open. 455 00:23:21,071 --> 00:23:22,404 We can do this. 456 00:23:22,406 --> 00:23:23,937 Sorry. 457 00:23:23,939 --> 00:23:28,276 It's on the other side of the grounds near the circus stuff. 458 00:23:28,278 --> 00:23:30,879 My God! Fucking Clown Town! 459 00:23:30,881 --> 00:23:32,083 Are you fucking serious? 460 00:23:35,786 --> 00:23:39,821 All right, so, we are by the main entrance. 461 00:23:39,823 --> 00:23:40,956 Clown Town is here. 462 00:23:40,958 --> 00:23:43,093 Yeah, we just gotta move quick. 463 00:23:43,095 --> 00:23:43,859 Stay quiet. 464 00:23:43,861 --> 00:23:45,362 You have flashlights? 465 00:23:45,364 --> 00:23:47,963 I always have flashlights. 466 00:23:47,965 --> 00:23:51,767 So you want to hike through 700 acres of nightmare filled 467 00:23:51,769 --> 00:23:54,704 with those pig fuck butchers and any other freak 468 00:23:54,706 --> 00:23:57,075 that Walsh has cooked up for the slim chance 469 00:23:57,077 --> 00:24:00,844 that Mr. Robot here can hack open a back door. 470 00:24:00,846 --> 00:24:02,480 You got any other plans? 471 00:24:02,482 --> 00:24:03,814 Uh, you turds go and get help. 472 00:24:03,816 --> 00:24:05,716 Me and Ashley are staying here where it's safe. 473 00:24:05,718 --> 00:24:06,884 What? 474 00:24:06,886 --> 00:24:08,387 DAX: No, we can't do that. It's a bad idea. 475 00:24:08,389 --> 00:24:11,989 Wa... Walsh said follow the rules. 476 00:24:11,991 --> 00:24:13,358 What rules? 477 00:24:13,360 --> 00:24:15,026 Dude, ru... rules of the genre, rules of the subgenres, 478 00:24:15,028 --> 00:24:16,962 the tropes, the principles. 479 00:24:16,964 --> 00:24:19,998 Rule number one is... is don't split up, dude. 480 00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:22,901 You... you seen a film before? 481 00:24:22,903 --> 00:24:25,003 I don't see movies. 482 00:24:25,005 --> 00:24:27,739 I make them. 483 00:24:27,741 --> 00:24:29,176 Babe, I got a signal. 484 00:24:29,178 --> 00:24:31,010 911 DISPATCHER (ON PHONE): 911, what's your emergency? 485 00:24:31,012 --> 00:24:32,513 Uh, yeah, I'm at Blood Fest. 486 00:24:32,515 --> 00:24:34,013 We're trapped on the festival grounds, 487 00:24:34,015 --> 00:24:36,150 and people are being slaughtered. 488 00:24:36,152 --> 00:24:38,818 I need immediate assistance for two people. 489 00:24:38,820 --> 00:24:40,387 911 DISPATCHER (ON PHONE): We have your location. 490 00:24:40,389 --> 00:24:42,290 Someone is on the way. 491 00:24:42,292 --> 00:24:43,592 Thank you very much. 492 00:24:43,594 --> 00:24:46,194 My name is Lenjamin Cain, and I'm a film director. 493 00:24:46,196 --> 00:24:47,429 And I'm a celebrity. 494 00:24:47,431 --> 00:24:48,762 And I'm with an up-and-coming actress, so... 495 00:24:48,764 --> 00:24:50,232 - Coming actress. - I'm with the coming actress. 496 00:24:50,234 --> 00:24:52,334 So if that will speed things up at all, that would be great. 497 00:24:52,336 --> 00:24:53,101 911 DISPATCHER (ON PHONE): Stay calm. 498 00:24:53,103 --> 00:24:54,137 Remain where you are. 499 00:24:54,139 --> 00:24:57,275 And if you can, go fuck yourself. 500 00:25:00,445 --> 00:25:01,977 What was that? 501 00:25:01,979 --> 00:25:03,312 911 DISPATCHER (ON PHONE): If you are able and so inclined, 502 00:25:03,314 --> 00:25:07,950 put your penis between your legs and into your anus. 503 00:25:07,952 --> 00:25:10,387 Then proceed to fuck yourself. 504 00:25:10,389 --> 00:25:11,854 And how would that help us? 505 00:25:11,856 --> 00:25:13,022 No one's coming. 506 00:25:13,024 --> 00:25:14,158 911 DISPATCHER (ON PHONE): Oh, don't worry. 507 00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:15,925 Someone should be there any moment. 508 00:25:15,927 --> 00:25:19,062 [chainsaw revving] 509 00:25:19,064 --> 00:25:20,097 [screams] 510 00:25:20,099 --> 00:25:20,797 Move! Move! 511 00:25:20,799 --> 00:25:21,466 Go! Go! 512 00:25:21,468 --> 00:25:22,534 Go! Go! 513 00:25:22,536 --> 00:25:23,468 Go! Come on! 514 00:25:23,470 --> 00:25:24,435 Through the door! 515 00:25:24,437 --> 00:25:26,103 Don't rush me! 516 00:25:26,105 --> 00:25:28,574 Anything else I can assist you with? 517 00:25:28,576 --> 00:25:31,477 Thank you for using 911. 518 00:25:31,479 --> 00:25:33,345 So that was a pleasant start. 519 00:25:33,347 --> 00:25:35,581 Billy, I want you to double-check the outer fences, 520 00:25:35,583 --> 00:25:38,082 get the voltage up to 700-plus. 521 00:25:38,084 --> 00:25:40,118 Amy, let's talk Clown Town. 522 00:25:40,120 --> 00:25:42,222 I want to see those freaks all riled up. 523 00:25:42,224 --> 00:25:43,689 They're riled up, sir. 524 00:25:43,691 --> 00:25:45,925 OK, make sure you catch any call that tries to get out. 525 00:25:45,927 --> 00:25:47,460 But on a few of them, play it cool. 526 00:25:47,462 --> 00:25:50,530 I at least put some people to think that help is on the way. 527 00:25:50,532 --> 00:25:52,332 Why? 528 00:25:52,334 --> 00:25:56,069 I mean, doesn't it seem kind of cruel just to give 529 00:25:56,071 --> 00:25:57,307 people a false sense of hope? 530 00:26:03,979 --> 00:26:07,349 What if I told you that you were going to die 531 00:26:07,351 --> 00:26:10,586 tonight no matter what you did? 532 00:26:10,588 --> 00:26:13,222 What would you feel? 533 00:26:13,224 --> 00:26:14,523 Despair. 534 00:26:14,525 --> 00:26:16,858 Despair. 535 00:26:16,860 --> 00:26:19,395 Now what if I told you, you had a chance 536 00:26:19,397 --> 00:26:23,466 but only, only if you made all the right calls, only if you 537 00:26:23,468 --> 00:26:26,168 took all the right steps, only you 538 00:26:26,170 --> 00:26:29,406 dug down deep inside your soul and you 539 00:26:29,408 --> 00:26:34,578 found some hidden strength you never even knew you had? 540 00:26:34,580 --> 00:26:35,847 How would you feel then? 541 00:26:38,284 --> 00:26:40,552 Motivated. 542 00:26:40,554 --> 00:26:42,886 Motivation. 543 00:26:42,888 --> 00:26:44,190 It's what every character needs. 544 00:26:47,294 --> 00:26:50,896 [music playing] 545 00:26:55,436 --> 00:26:57,969 DAX: I'm telling you, there are rules you have to follow, 546 00:26:57,971 --> 00:26:59,904 like don't chant anything in Latin. 547 00:26:59,906 --> 00:27:01,039 Don't get naked. 548 00:27:01,041 --> 00:27:02,441 Never be alone with a doll... 549 00:27:02,443 --> 00:27:03,509 those kinds of things. 550 00:27:03,511 --> 00:27:05,945 ASHLEY: These rules are ridiculous. 551 00:27:05,947 --> 00:27:08,448 Ashley, Ashley, Ashley, Ashley. 552 00:27:08,450 --> 00:27:09,351 Let me see that badge. 553 00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:15,522 Yeah, I think I should hold on this. 554 00:27:15,524 --> 00:27:16,591 Why? 555 00:27:16,593 --> 00:27:17,458 Because I don't trust the monster squad 556 00:27:17,460 --> 00:27:19,092 to get us out of here alive. 557 00:27:19,094 --> 00:27:20,361 Are we going backwards? 558 00:27:20,363 --> 00:27:21,329 It's upside down. 559 00:27:21,331 --> 00:27:22,430 Do you trust me? 560 00:27:22,432 --> 00:27:26,066 Babe, no. 561 00:27:26,068 --> 00:27:27,602 You're an actress. 562 00:27:27,604 --> 00:27:28,803 All right, let's keep moving. 563 00:27:28,805 --> 00:27:30,539 Well, uh, wh... wh... whoa! Wait a minute. 564 00:27:30,541 --> 00:27:32,006 Wait a minute. 565 00:27:32,008 --> 00:27:33,975 Maybe we should double-back and find a different route. 566 00:27:33,977 --> 00:27:34,942 Double-back? 567 00:27:34,944 --> 00:27:37,379 This is a straight shot. 568 00:27:37,381 --> 00:27:38,846 Oh, wait. 569 00:27:38,848 --> 00:27:41,685 You don't think we're going to wake the dead, you know? 570 00:27:41,687 --> 00:27:43,386 Like get attacked by zombies? 571 00:27:43,388 --> 00:27:44,354 Maybe. 572 00:27:44,356 --> 00:27:46,055 Are you serious? 573 00:27:46,057 --> 00:27:46,922 You're right. 574 00:27:46,924 --> 00:27:48,157 We should be really respectful. 575 00:27:48,159 --> 00:27:50,959 Excuse me, sir or madam, I'm so sorry to tread 576 00:27:50,961 --> 00:27:52,630 on your forever resting place. 577 00:27:52,632 --> 00:27:53,499 [evil chuckle] 578 00:27:56,402 --> 00:27:58,001 Those are props. 579 00:27:58,003 --> 00:28:01,037 This is not a real graveyard, OK? 580 00:28:01,039 --> 00:28:02,707 Do you honestly think that Walsh wouldn't spring 581 00:28:02,709 --> 00:28:04,676 for real tombstones but went ahead 582 00:28:04,678 --> 00:28:07,178 and got a boatload of corpses from... 583 00:28:07,180 --> 00:28:09,013 God knows where you get corpses! 584 00:28:09,015 --> 00:28:11,115 And then he figured out a way to animate them. 585 00:28:11,117 --> 00:28:13,585 And then he buried them here in the hopes 586 00:28:13,587 --> 00:28:16,120 that we would come tromping through 587 00:28:16,122 --> 00:28:19,091 and make a little too much noise, wake the dead, 588 00:28:19,093 --> 00:28:20,660 and get attacked by zombies. 589 00:28:20,662 --> 00:28:23,063 Well, there's no such thing as zombies! 590 00:28:27,402 --> 00:28:28,502 What? 591 00:28:28,504 --> 00:28:31,538 It's just... that's usually when... 592 00:28:31,540 --> 00:28:33,674 when something happens to you. 593 00:28:33,676 --> 00:28:36,477 Like what? 594 00:28:36,479 --> 00:28:37,444 Ah! 595 00:28:37,446 --> 00:28:38,313 That. 596 00:28:41,283 --> 00:28:43,016 Lenjamin! 597 00:28:43,018 --> 00:28:46,222 [screams] 598 00:28:49,559 --> 00:28:51,626 Maybe he's OK. 599 00:28:51,628 --> 00:28:53,061 [belch] ASHLEY: Oh! 600 00:28:53,063 --> 00:28:54,062 Maybe not! 601 00:28:54,064 --> 00:28:57,134 [music playing] 602 00:29:03,474 --> 00:29:04,441 The cabin! 603 00:29:04,443 --> 00:29:05,442 The cabin! 604 00:29:05,444 --> 00:29:06,310 Go! 605 00:29:10,816 --> 00:29:12,016 DAX: Go! 606 00:29:17,457 --> 00:29:18,355 SAM: This way! 607 00:29:18,357 --> 00:29:19,222 Oh, my God! 608 00:29:19,224 --> 00:29:19,956 It smells like dead people! 609 00:29:19,958 --> 00:29:20,792 Smells like dead people! 610 00:29:20,794 --> 00:29:21,793 DAX: Come on! Quickly! 611 00:29:21,795 --> 00:29:23,795 Get the door! Get the door! 612 00:29:23,797 --> 00:29:24,462 KRILL: Go! Get the doorbell! 613 00:29:24,464 --> 00:29:26,163 Hello! Help us! 614 00:29:26,165 --> 00:29:27,130 HINCKLEY: I'm sorry! 615 00:29:27,132 --> 00:29:28,299 We're all full! 616 00:29:28,301 --> 00:29:30,436 I'm sorry there's no more room in here! 617 00:29:30,438 --> 00:29:31,202 What? 618 00:29:31,204 --> 00:29:32,270 HINCKLEY: We have a... 619 00:29:32,272 --> 00:29:33,472 we have a pregnant woman in here. 620 00:29:33,474 --> 00:29:36,274 And, uh, we have... actually, we have two 621 00:29:36,276 --> 00:29:38,477 pregnant women in here and... 622 00:29:38,479 --> 00:29:40,847 DAX: Hinckley. 623 00:29:40,849 --> 00:29:44,283 Barricade the door. 624 00:29:44,285 --> 00:29:45,184 I was... 625 00:29:45,186 --> 00:29:47,085 I was trying to open the lock. 626 00:29:47,087 --> 00:29:48,521 The lock was kind of tricky. 627 00:29:48,523 --> 00:29:49,390 He's gone. 628 00:29:51,726 --> 00:29:52,893 He's gone. 629 00:29:52,895 --> 00:29:55,094 And he was going to direct a rom-com. 630 00:29:55,096 --> 00:29:57,430 I was going to be the rom! 631 00:29:57,432 --> 00:29:58,364 Dax! 632 00:29:58,366 --> 00:29:59,299 What do we do? 633 00:29:59,301 --> 00:30:01,234 How should I know? Huh? 634 00:30:01,236 --> 00:30:02,703 We're probably all dead. 635 00:30:02,705 --> 00:30:04,473 And not just die in our sleep dead, which is bad enough, 636 00:30:04,475 --> 00:30:06,273 but "being eaten alive by zombies," 637 00:30:06,275 --> 00:30:09,243 screaming, "waiting for it all to end" dead. 638 00:30:09,245 --> 00:30:11,646 SAM: Hey, can I have a minute? 639 00:30:11,648 --> 00:30:12,581 KRILL: You'll be OK. 640 00:30:12,583 --> 00:30:13,414 Don't cry. 641 00:30:13,416 --> 00:30:16,217 SAM: That is not helping. 642 00:30:16,219 --> 00:30:18,353 OK, we need to come up with a plan. 643 00:30:18,355 --> 00:30:19,454 I don't know what to do. 644 00:30:19,456 --> 00:30:20,590 I don't know shit! 645 00:30:20,592 --> 00:30:21,389 Dax! 646 00:30:21,391 --> 00:30:22,725 All you know is shit! 647 00:30:22,727 --> 00:30:25,528 But that shit is of particular value right now! 648 00:30:25,530 --> 00:30:27,663 We've got a dozen horror movies between us 649 00:30:27,665 --> 00:30:29,800 and actually surviving this mess. 650 00:30:29,802 --> 00:30:32,536 Walsh is using every trope in the book. 651 00:30:32,538 --> 00:30:34,872 Jesus, if I was a virgin, I'd probably 652 00:30:34,874 --> 00:30:38,241 have a fighting chance. 653 00:30:38,243 --> 00:30:39,743 You're not a virgin? 654 00:30:39,745 --> 00:30:43,848 The point is that no one knows these movies better than you. 655 00:30:43,850 --> 00:30:46,416 So we need you to pull it together 656 00:30:46,418 --> 00:30:49,721 and help us get out of here. 657 00:30:49,723 --> 00:30:51,556 OK, OK. 658 00:30:51,558 --> 00:30:52,490 All right. 659 00:30:52,492 --> 00:30:53,626 Let's think here. 660 00:30:53,628 --> 00:30:56,862 OK, so what are we dealing with here? 661 00:30:56,864 --> 00:30:57,930 Huh? 662 00:30:57,932 --> 00:30:59,765 Nothing outside was running, right? 663 00:30:59,767 --> 00:31:00,533 No Snyders? 664 00:31:00,535 --> 00:31:02,668 No Boyles? OK. 665 00:31:02,670 --> 00:31:03,769 We know how to kill them. 666 00:31:03,771 --> 00:31:05,204 HINCKLEY: How? 667 00:31:05,206 --> 00:31:07,172 KRILL: Oh, shit. 668 00:31:07,174 --> 00:31:10,610 Shit, shit, shit. 669 00:31:10,612 --> 00:31:13,279 If this goes all Evil Dead, I'm gonna pop! 670 00:31:13,281 --> 00:31:17,417 The zombies are coming! 671 00:31:17,419 --> 00:31:18,451 [screaming] 672 00:31:18,453 --> 00:31:19,321 Oh, my God! 673 00:31:22,190 --> 00:31:23,423 Hit him in the head! Dax! 674 00:31:23,425 --> 00:31:23,991 Somebody! 675 00:31:23,993 --> 00:31:25,193 Get him... 676 00:31:30,466 --> 00:31:32,199 A hit to the head takes them down. 677 00:31:32,201 --> 00:31:33,369 Wouldn't that kill anything? 678 00:31:41,613 --> 00:31:42,946 This is a GoPro. 679 00:31:42,948 --> 00:31:44,614 Walsh... he's filming us. 680 00:31:44,616 --> 00:31:45,582 KRILL: Oh, oh! 681 00:31:45,584 --> 00:31:47,850 Jesus. 682 00:31:47,852 --> 00:31:48,918 Ah! 683 00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:50,452 These... these things are electrodes. 684 00:31:50,454 --> 00:31:52,288 Those things resurrect the dead. 685 00:31:52,290 --> 00:31:53,289 He's controlling them. 686 00:31:53,291 --> 00:31:56,294 [suspenseful music] 687 00:32:01,734 --> 00:32:03,701 I think I know where the signal's coming from. 688 00:32:03,703 --> 00:32:04,636 Let's move. 689 00:32:04,638 --> 00:32:07,540 [zombies growling] 690 00:32:12,946 --> 00:32:14,946 Faster, faster, move faster! 691 00:32:14,948 --> 00:32:16,649 Go, go, go! Come on. 692 00:32:16,651 --> 00:32:17,650 VIDEO GAME: Great! 693 00:32:17,652 --> 00:32:20,620 Powered up! 694 00:32:20,622 --> 00:32:23,923 Zombie needs food fast! 695 00:32:23,925 --> 00:32:26,926 Time to nom-nom, zom! 696 00:32:26,928 --> 00:32:28,294 How's it going, guys? 697 00:32:28,296 --> 00:32:29,562 Need anything? 698 00:32:29,564 --> 00:32:30,931 Doritos? Red Bull? 699 00:32:30,933 --> 00:32:32,032 Corn syrup? 700 00:32:32,034 --> 00:32:34,001 No, but these super real graphics 701 00:32:34,003 --> 00:32:35,501 are hella cheesing, my dude. 702 00:32:35,503 --> 00:32:37,603 Also, my guys are moving slow. 703 00:32:37,605 --> 00:32:39,940 Well... he's a zombie. 704 00:32:39,942 --> 00:32:42,877 Yeah, that's boring. 705 00:32:42,879 --> 00:32:44,679 When are we going to play the victims? 706 00:32:44,681 --> 00:32:45,913 Soon. 707 00:32:45,915 --> 00:32:46,914 I promise. 708 00:32:46,916 --> 00:32:49,485 [zombies growling] 709 00:32:50,854 --> 00:32:51,853 DAX: Oh, shit! 710 00:32:51,855 --> 00:32:54,555 Here they come! 711 00:32:54,557 --> 00:32:56,493 [banging] 712 00:32:59,864 --> 00:33:02,865 OK, yeah, got it. 713 00:33:02,867 --> 00:33:05,436 [suspenseful music] 714 00:33:16,515 --> 00:33:17,416 Excuse me... 715 00:33:22,487 --> 00:33:23,422 Oh, shit. 716 00:33:28,528 --> 00:33:29,460 Uh... 717 00:33:29,462 --> 00:33:30,796 You have to hit him in the head! 718 00:33:30,798 --> 00:33:31,830 I'm not going to hit a corpse! 719 00:33:31,832 --> 00:33:33,564 That's disgusting! 720 00:33:33,566 --> 00:33:34,434 Oh, my God! 721 00:33:38,538 --> 00:33:39,137 Oh! 722 00:33:39,139 --> 00:33:40,374 Oh, my God! 723 00:33:46,748 --> 00:33:47,747 Get away! 724 00:33:47,749 --> 00:33:48,513 Oh, my God! 725 00:33:48,515 --> 00:33:49,581 How's it coming, Dax? 726 00:33:49,583 --> 00:33:52,652 Blue, green, red, another red... 727 00:33:52,654 --> 00:33:54,654 - instructions maybe. - Do something! 728 00:33:54,656 --> 00:33:56,123 There's too many wires! All right? 729 00:33:56,125 --> 00:33:57,057 Which one do I pull? 730 00:33:57,059 --> 00:33:58,025 It's not a bomb! 731 00:33:58,027 --> 00:33:59,793 Just pull them all! 732 00:33:59,795 --> 00:34:05,100 George Romero, if you're out there, save us. 733 00:34:05,102 --> 00:34:06,669 [panting] 734 00:34:10,073 --> 00:34:11,472 What? 735 00:34:11,474 --> 00:34:12,239 Yo! 736 00:34:12,241 --> 00:34:14,075 That's some bullshit! 737 00:34:14,077 --> 00:34:15,611 A... are there autosaves? 738 00:34:18,548 --> 00:34:19,380 Oh! 739 00:34:19,382 --> 00:34:20,750 - They're dead? - Oh! 740 00:34:20,752 --> 00:34:21,516 Fuck! 741 00:34:21,518 --> 00:34:22,519 They were dead before! 742 00:34:26,124 --> 00:34:26,856 Come on. 743 00:34:26,858 --> 00:34:27,990 We gotta get moving. 744 00:34:27,992 --> 00:34:28,992 Let's... let's go! 745 00:34:28,994 --> 00:34:30,227 Quick 746 00:34:30,229 --> 00:34:34,064 Question do you mind if I just tag along? 747 00:34:34,066 --> 00:34:35,264 Are you... are you kidding? 748 00:34:35,266 --> 00:34:38,434 Well, it just occurs to me that the guy 749 00:34:38,436 --> 00:34:41,806 that gets left behind is usually the next one to bite it. 750 00:34:41,808 --> 00:34:43,841 I mean, at least that's the Arborist's MO. 751 00:34:43,843 --> 00:34:45,977 Huh, you have seen the movies. 752 00:34:45,979 --> 00:34:47,011 I read the scripts... 753 00:34:47,013 --> 00:34:47,881 once. 754 00:34:52,485 --> 00:34:55,720 Everyone deserves a chance at redemption. 755 00:34:55,722 --> 00:34:57,956 Come on. 756 00:34:57,958 --> 00:35:00,527 [music playing] 757 00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:06,132 Billy! 758 00:35:06,134 --> 00:35:08,835 I'm going to need you to fix that zombie transmitter. 759 00:35:08,837 --> 00:35:11,436 While you're at it, add a few extra dead. 760 00:35:11,438 --> 00:35:13,472 God knows we have the corpses. 761 00:35:13,474 --> 00:35:15,774 Sir, may I remind you your partner 762 00:35:15,776 --> 00:35:19,113 didn't authorize any repairs after the first death? 763 00:35:19,115 --> 00:35:22,183 Yes, but he's not here right now. 764 00:35:22,185 --> 00:35:23,616 And I am. 765 00:35:23,618 --> 00:35:26,086 And I'm trying to make a movie! 766 00:35:26,088 --> 00:35:28,190 Huh? 767 00:35:28,192 --> 00:35:29,557 Cultists! 768 00:35:29,559 --> 00:35:30,292 Go wide! 769 00:35:30,294 --> 00:35:31,059 Go wide on the cultists! 770 00:35:31,061 --> 00:35:31,893 Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. 771 00:35:31,895 --> 00:35:34,029 Now smash cut to the yeti. 772 00:35:34,031 --> 00:35:35,496 Oh, good. 773 00:35:35,498 --> 00:35:37,464 You see how you juxtapose the two, and you tell a story? 774 00:35:37,466 --> 00:35:38,499 Oh, my God! 775 00:35:38,501 --> 00:35:40,535 He is eating her face! 776 00:35:40,537 --> 00:35:41,137 Oh! 777 00:35:41,139 --> 00:35:42,004 Oh, my God! 778 00:35:42,006 --> 00:35:44,106 That is deliciously disgusting. 779 00:35:44,108 --> 00:35:45,241 Oh! 780 00:35:45,243 --> 00:35:47,475 How do you do all this? 781 00:35:47,477 --> 00:35:49,045 Like how do you get all these participants? 782 00:35:49,047 --> 00:35:51,881 Oh, it took a lot of work... 783 00:35:51,883 --> 00:35:52,715 years of it. 784 00:35:52,717 --> 00:35:56,086 I found some scary people. 785 00:35:56,088 --> 00:35:58,856 And the homicidal maniacs? 786 00:35:58,858 --> 00:36:03,793 You take a clinically damaged mind, you force him to watch 787 00:36:03,795 --> 00:36:06,496 one movie continuously. 788 00:36:06,498 --> 00:36:12,036 Eventually, the movie mythos becomes the man's mythos. 789 00:36:12,038 --> 00:36:18,010 Eventually, the movie world becomes the man's world. 790 00:36:18,012 --> 00:36:23,648 You tell him he's Leatherface, he's Leatherface. 791 00:36:23,650 --> 00:36:25,817 The clowns I found on Craigslist. 792 00:36:25,819 --> 00:36:29,222 Uh, hey, sorry about your boyfriend. 793 00:36:29,224 --> 00:36:31,892 He wasn't my boyfriend... 794 00:36:31,894 --> 00:36:34,060 not really. 795 00:36:34,062 --> 00:36:36,196 Next time a director's casting couch is a futon, 796 00:36:36,198 --> 00:36:38,231 I'm walking the other way. 797 00:36:38,233 --> 00:36:39,433 Futon? 798 00:36:44,673 --> 00:36:47,841 Kind of reminds me of April Showers from Arbor Day 4. 799 00:36:47,843 --> 00:36:51,245 10 years ago, there was the Arbor Day massacre, right? 800 00:36:51,247 --> 00:36:54,715 And Hodderton High has still not recovered. 801 00:36:54,717 --> 00:36:56,751 So spring break at Hodderton High, right? 802 00:36:56,753 --> 00:36:59,154 School is closed, but the botany class stays behind 803 00:36:59,156 --> 00:37:02,124 for some extracurricular fun. 804 00:37:02,126 --> 00:37:05,827 God, this is some of the best kills of the series, man. 805 00:37:05,829 --> 00:37:09,798 I mean, that one where you drown that guy in a tub of sap. 806 00:37:09,800 --> 00:37:10,432 Fuck! 807 00:37:10,434 --> 00:37:11,633 I mean, shit! 808 00:37:11,635 --> 00:37:13,970 That was horrifying! 809 00:37:13,972 --> 00:37:16,040 So slow. 810 00:37:16,042 --> 00:37:17,840 So sticky. 811 00:37:17,842 --> 00:37:20,044 That was my idea. 812 00:37:20,046 --> 00:37:20,978 What? 813 00:37:20,980 --> 00:37:22,012 Oh, yeah. 814 00:37:22,014 --> 00:37:23,479 The director, he wanted to move on. 815 00:37:23,481 --> 00:37:26,749 He wanted to just smash some skulls, keep going... faster. 816 00:37:26,751 --> 00:37:29,753 I said, no, no, no, let's slow this down, OK? 817 00:37:29,755 --> 00:37:35,193 Because the arborist would take his time, like a tree. 818 00:37:35,195 --> 00:37:36,294 I knew it. 819 00:37:36,296 --> 00:37:38,196 Knew what? 820 00:37:38,198 --> 00:37:40,299 I knew that you knew more about the films 821 00:37:40,301 --> 00:37:42,600 than you were letting on. Come on, dude! 822 00:37:42,602 --> 00:37:44,036 Just do the catchphrase for me once! 823 00:37:44,038 --> 00:37:45,037 Please! Just once! 824 00:37:45,039 --> 00:37:46,105 Come on! I hate Arbor Day. 825 00:37:46,107 --> 00:37:47,406 You don't! How can you hate it? 826 00:37:47,408 --> 00:37:49,442 I mean, you go to these conventions all the time. 827 00:37:49,444 --> 00:37:51,077 You did six films for fuck's sake! 828 00:37:51,079 --> 00:37:53,246 I am an actor, OK? 829 00:37:53,248 --> 00:37:55,748 - I'm a serious actor. - You guys? 830 00:37:55,750 --> 00:37:59,019 Arbor Day was my first fucking movie. 831 00:37:59,021 --> 00:37:59,852 Somebody said me, "Hey, Roger. 832 00:37:59,854 --> 00:38:00,988 You want to wear a mask?" 833 00:38:00,990 --> 00:38:02,222 I said, "A mask? 834 00:38:02,224 --> 00:38:02,990 Are you kidding? 835 00:38:02,992 --> 00:38:04,392 I want to see my face! 836 00:38:04,394 --> 00:38:08,029 I want to see my God damn face on that big screen!" 837 00:38:08,031 --> 00:38:11,299 If I had hidden my face, I would've been able to move on. 838 00:38:11,301 --> 00:38:12,833 But, no. 839 00:38:12,835 --> 00:38:17,306 No, this is the face of tree horror. 840 00:38:17,308 --> 00:38:18,207 Guys! 841 00:38:18,209 --> 00:38:19,308 Guys! 842 00:38:19,310 --> 00:38:21,644 I... I... I think someone's watching us! 843 00:38:26,217 --> 00:38:27,284 Fuck me. 844 00:38:31,356 --> 00:38:34,024 [music playing] 845 00:38:34,026 --> 00:38:35,025 Ah! 846 00:38:35,027 --> 00:38:36,326 Oh, my God! 847 00:38:36,328 --> 00:38:38,328 Oh, my God! 848 00:38:38,330 --> 00:38:40,164 [zombie growling] 849 00:38:40,166 --> 00:38:41,034 [screaming] 850 00:38:42,035 --> 00:38:42,966 Go! 851 00:38:42,968 --> 00:38:43,967 Go! 852 00:38:43,969 --> 00:38:44,934 Oh, my God! 853 00:38:44,936 --> 00:38:47,271 Ah! 854 00:38:47,273 --> 00:38:48,938 Did you see that guy? 855 00:38:48,940 --> 00:38:49,841 Oh, my God! 856 00:38:58,718 --> 00:39:00,385 You played that guy? 857 00:39:00,387 --> 00:39:02,387 Why is he so much bigger than you? 858 00:39:02,389 --> 00:39:03,822 I lost a lot of weight, all right? 859 00:39:03,824 --> 00:39:06,325 Plus, I have a thyroid issue. 860 00:39:06,327 --> 00:39:07,559 I used to just eat a lot. 861 00:39:07,561 --> 00:39:10,263 Wait, did you guys see where Krill went? 862 00:39:10,265 --> 00:39:11,763 He... he got away. 863 00:39:11,765 --> 00:39:12,664 He went the other direction. 864 00:39:12,666 --> 00:39:14,200 We should get in. Come on. 865 00:39:14,202 --> 00:39:15,634 It's Hodderton High. 866 00:39:15,636 --> 00:39:17,237 You killed like 12 people here in the original film. 867 00:39:17,239 --> 00:39:18,105 I didn't kill anybody! 868 00:39:18,107 --> 00:39:20,340 OK, let's just get inside! 869 00:39:20,342 --> 00:39:23,709 Hey, that's... that's not such a good idea. 870 00:39:23,711 --> 00:39:25,245 We don't have a choice, Dax! 871 00:39:25,247 --> 00:39:26,082 Did you watch the movie? 872 00:39:28,951 --> 00:39:30,118 Hello! 873 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:31,252 Wait, there's someone inside! 874 00:39:31,254 --> 00:39:32,287 Come on! Come on! 875 00:39:32,289 --> 00:39:33,321 Come on! 876 00:39:33,323 --> 00:39:34,255 Thank you. 877 00:39:34,257 --> 00:39:35,223 Thank you! 878 00:39:35,225 --> 00:39:37,125 Oh, thank you! 879 00:39:37,127 --> 00:39:39,327 Wait, I know you. 880 00:39:39,329 --> 00:39:40,329 You're Zachary Levi. 881 00:39:40,331 --> 00:39:42,131 The karaoke guy? 882 00:39:42,133 --> 00:39:44,166 Listen, I think we're going to safe, all right? 883 00:39:44,168 --> 00:39:45,468 The windows are all secured. 884 00:39:45,470 --> 00:39:46,402 The door is locked. 885 00:39:46,404 --> 00:39:48,137 Flynn Ryder! 886 00:39:48,139 --> 00:39:50,206 You're Flynn fucking Ryder! 887 00:39:50,208 --> 00:39:51,340 You've never seen a single film, 888 00:39:51,342 --> 00:39:52,975 but you've seen "Tangled." 889 00:39:52,977 --> 00:39:53,809 Maybe. 890 00:39:53,811 --> 00:39:55,878 Are you... are you alone? 891 00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:57,380 I was... 892 00:39:57,382 --> 00:39:59,416 I was... I was with my friends, some of my closest friends. 893 00:39:59,418 --> 00:40:01,418 We stuck together when things got nutty. 894 00:40:01,420 --> 00:40:03,286 We made it through the woods. 895 00:40:03,288 --> 00:40:05,123 And then we were attacked by these 896 00:40:05,125 --> 00:40:07,258 crazed cannibal hillbillies. 897 00:40:07,260 --> 00:40:08,493 They tracked us down. They hunted us. 898 00:40:08,495 --> 00:40:10,228 They were killing and eating my friends... 899 00:40:10,230 --> 00:40:12,296 I think about Flynn Ryder a lot. 900 00:40:12,298 --> 00:40:16,033 I mean... a lot. 901 00:40:16,035 --> 00:40:18,137 It was the saddest, most terrifying 902 00:40:18,139 --> 00:40:19,271 thing I've ever witnessed. 903 00:40:19,273 --> 00:40:20,506 Like, I couldn't believe... 904 00:40:20,508 --> 00:40:24,108 When Flynn smolders at Rapunzel, I felt... 905 00:40:24,110 --> 00:40:25,712 I don't know... humid. 906 00:40:28,316 --> 00:40:30,450 There's this one gi... there was a girl that I loved... 907 00:40:30,452 --> 00:40:31,884 actually, she was the love of my life... 908 00:40:31,886 --> 00:40:32,751 and I didn't have a chance to tell her, because we were 909 00:40:32,753 --> 00:40:34,052 trying to run to the school. 910 00:40:34,054 --> 00:40:36,289 Right before we got in the door, they grabbed her. 911 00:40:36,291 --> 00:40:37,357 And they started to tear her apart. 912 00:40:37,359 --> 00:40:38,191 - My hair is magical. - It was... 913 00:40:38,193 --> 00:40:40,561 Well, sometimes magical. 914 00:40:40,563 --> 00:40:42,263 OK, let's focus. 915 00:40:42,265 --> 00:40:44,198 I'm so sorry about your friends. 916 00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:45,366 Is this place safe? 917 00:40:45,368 --> 00:40:47,168 Like I said, the windows were all sealed, 918 00:40:47,170 --> 00:40:48,402 and I've locked all the doors. 919 00:40:48,404 --> 00:40:50,970 Without this key right here, there's no way in. 920 00:40:50,972 --> 00:40:52,274 Or out. 921 00:40:52,276 --> 00:40:53,776 Well, of course, but we wouldn't want to go out... 922 00:41:01,083 --> 00:41:04,353 Flynn Ryder! 923 00:41:04,355 --> 00:41:05,956 [screaming] 924 00:41:08,992 --> 00:41:10,359 The classroom. 925 00:41:10,361 --> 00:41:11,229 Go, go, go, go go! 926 00:41:16,235 --> 00:41:17,401 Oh, my God. 927 00:41:17,403 --> 00:41:18,368 Oh, my God! 928 00:41:18,370 --> 00:41:19,238 Oh, my God! 929 00:41:21,507 --> 00:41:22,805 [MUSIC - SMASH MOUTH, "ALL STAR"] 930 00:41:22,807 --> 00:41:27,511 Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me. 931 00:41:27,513 --> 00:41:29,280 I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed. 932 00:41:29,282 --> 00:41:30,648 Yo! What up, dude? 933 00:41:30,650 --> 00:41:32,517 Welcome to the party, bro! GUY: What's up, dude? 934 00:41:32,519 --> 00:41:33,218 Don't you know what's going on? 935 00:41:33,220 --> 00:41:34,385 People are dying! 936 00:41:34,387 --> 00:41:35,286 It's Blood Fest, dude! 937 00:41:35,288 --> 00:41:36,354 GUY: Fucking Blood Fest, bro. 938 00:41:36,356 --> 00:41:39,022 No, I mean actually getting killed. 939 00:41:39,024 --> 00:41:42,026 Walsh made everything real... the monsters, everything. 940 00:41:42,028 --> 00:41:43,596 Oh, really? 941 00:41:43,598 --> 00:41:48,367 He's created werewolves, ghosts, vampires. 942 00:41:48,369 --> 00:41:49,867 Oh, yeah. 943 00:41:49,869 --> 00:41:51,403 It sounds like somebody dipped into the K-2 a little early. 944 00:41:51,405 --> 00:41:53,138 [laughter] 945 00:41:53,140 --> 00:41:55,642 Dork. 946 00:41:55,644 --> 00:41:57,577 If we don't get that key, we're not going out of here. 947 00:41:57,579 --> 00:42:01,414 I am not going to be murdered by the Arborist! 948 00:42:01,416 --> 00:42:04,217 That is just too fucking ironic! 949 00:42:04,219 --> 00:42:07,187 Every... every answer is in the origin story, right? 950 00:42:07,189 --> 00:42:09,024 Jason's drowning, Freddy's burning. 951 00:42:13,028 --> 00:42:13,628 I got it. 952 00:42:13,630 --> 00:42:15,597 Tommy Wakes. 953 00:42:15,599 --> 00:42:18,400 - Tommy who? - Tommy. 954 00:42:18,402 --> 00:42:19,434 You! The Arborist. 955 00:42:19,436 --> 00:42:21,035 Oh, sure. Good. 956 00:42:21,037 --> 00:42:22,103 Guys... 957 00:42:22,105 --> 00:42:23,338 So your dad was the school arborist, 958 00:42:23,340 --> 00:42:25,507 and you watched as some teenagers accidentally 959 00:42:25,509 --> 00:42:27,943 killed your father and then used a wood 960 00:42:27,945 --> 00:42:29,312 chipper to bury the body. 961 00:42:29,314 --> 00:42:30,779 Jesus. 962 00:42:30,781 --> 00:42:36,386 Yeah, you grew up alone in the woods, raised by the trees. 963 00:42:36,388 --> 00:42:38,153 Is... is that in the movie? 964 00:42:38,155 --> 00:42:38,920 It's implied. 965 00:42:38,922 --> 00:42:40,391 What about that scar? 966 00:42:40,393 --> 00:42:42,293 What about that alien mark that shows that I'm their spawn? 967 00:42:42,295 --> 00:42:43,126 No, no, no, no. 968 00:42:43,128 --> 00:42:44,528 That's part five, mistake. 969 00:42:44,530 --> 00:42:46,563 In part six, they pretend it never happened, right? 970 00:42:46,565 --> 00:42:47,298 Faster. 971 00:42:47,300 --> 00:42:48,732 OK, uh, all right. 972 00:42:48,734 --> 00:42:53,538 You are solely killing to avenge your father's death. 973 00:42:53,540 --> 00:42:54,271 I'm not lying. 974 00:42:54,273 --> 00:42:56,374 It... it... it's true. 975 00:42:56,376 --> 00:42:58,576 Walsh somehow made monsters real. 976 00:42:58,578 --> 00:42:59,877 I don't know how to explain this. 977 00:42:59,879 --> 00:43:05,150 Well, I suppose vampires would be simple enough. 978 00:43:05,152 --> 00:43:06,485 There's a way out... 979 00:43:06,487 --> 00:43:07,753 a back gate. 980 00:43:07,755 --> 00:43:08,953 If I could just get to the others, we'll be... 981 00:43:08,955 --> 00:43:10,489 You would just lure girls from Eastern 982 00:43:10,491 --> 00:43:17,163 Europe with promises of visas and high-paying American jobs. 983 00:43:17,165 --> 00:43:20,667 Uh, yeah, I mean, America's great for that. 984 00:43:20,669 --> 00:43:24,203 And then you would surgically sharpen their teeth. 985 00:43:24,205 --> 00:43:27,374 And you would chemically stimulate glands, 986 00:43:27,376 --> 00:43:31,244 so they produce abnormal amounts of pheromones, 987 00:43:31,246 --> 00:43:34,917 making them sexually irresistible. 988 00:43:38,521 --> 00:43:40,622 Wow. 989 00:43:40,624 --> 00:43:42,524 You are really pretty. 990 00:43:42,526 --> 00:43:47,563 And then finally, you would infect them with a chronic case 991 00:43:47,565 --> 00:43:48,998 of porphyria. 992 00:43:55,306 --> 00:43:57,005 Wh... what is that? 993 00:43:57,007 --> 00:44:00,443 It's a rare disease resulting in insomnia, 994 00:44:00,445 --> 00:44:05,383 heightened sensitivity to light, and an unquenchable thirst 995 00:44:05,385 --> 00:44:07,418 for blood. 996 00:44:07,420 --> 00:44:09,453 Is that a real thing? 997 00:44:09,455 --> 00:44:10,322 Look it up. 998 00:44:16,430 --> 00:44:19,398 [screaming] 999 00:44:19,400 --> 00:44:20,266 Oh. 1000 00:44:24,605 --> 00:44:27,607 I... I'm sorry. 1001 00:44:27,609 --> 00:44:30,777 I... I'm not going to stay. 1002 00:44:30,779 --> 00:44:33,513 You're such a neat girl. 1003 00:44:33,515 --> 00:44:36,582 I really would love to stay here and maybe have sex with you. 1004 00:44:36,584 --> 00:44:37,483 I really would. 1005 00:44:37,485 --> 00:44:38,352 I just... 1006 00:44:41,089 --> 00:44:43,657 You've never be with a woman. 1007 00:44:43,659 --> 00:44:45,126 Not in person, no. 1008 00:44:49,230 --> 00:44:53,066 Look, my friends are out there, and they might need me. 1009 00:44:53,068 --> 00:44:53,701 Oh! 1010 00:44:53,703 --> 00:44:56,403 Such loyalty! 1011 00:44:56,405 --> 00:44:59,707 Such innocence. 1012 00:44:59,709 --> 00:45:00,742 You could come with us. 1013 00:45:00,744 --> 00:45:03,210 I mean, maybe... there's a way out. 1014 00:45:03,212 --> 00:45:04,480 - No, get away. - No, don't. 1015 00:45:04,482 --> 00:45:05,380 - Please... - No! 1016 00:45:05,382 --> 00:45:07,215 Go! 1017 00:45:07,217 --> 00:45:08,584 OK. 1018 00:45:08,586 --> 00:45:09,485 Go! 1019 00:45:09,487 --> 00:45:10,353 I'm sorry. 1020 00:45:13,458 --> 00:45:14,324 I suck with girls. 1021 00:45:22,634 --> 00:45:24,166 So here's what you're gonna do. 1022 00:45:24,168 --> 00:45:28,171 You are going to distract him by pretending to be his dad. 1023 00:45:28,173 --> 00:45:29,640 - Whose dad? - Your dad. 1024 00:45:29,642 --> 00:45:30,541 My dad. 1025 00:45:30,543 --> 00:45:33,210 Yeah, his dad. 1026 00:45:33,212 --> 00:45:38,749 He's, uh, he's a... he's a complicated character, right? 1027 00:45:38,751 --> 00:45:43,755 A tragic soul, a ghostly patriarch reaching out 1028 00:45:43,757 --> 00:45:45,791 to his troubled son. 1029 00:45:45,793 --> 00:45:48,794 It's Hamlet's father. 1030 00:45:48,796 --> 00:45:50,363 It's the role you were born to play. 1031 00:46:17,594 --> 00:46:18,461 Son. 1032 00:46:25,434 --> 00:46:29,339 I am so... so proud of you. 1033 00:46:32,175 --> 00:46:38,213 You have avenged me, honored me. 1034 00:46:38,215 --> 00:46:43,654 You have ripped up all the diseased roots. 1035 00:46:43,656 --> 00:46:47,456 You've thrashed all the weeds. 1036 00:46:47,458 --> 00:46:51,796 You've cleared the garden of all the fickle growth 1037 00:46:51,798 --> 00:46:54,366 so that a true tree may thrive! 1038 00:46:56,903 --> 00:47:00,272 That tree is you. 1039 00:47:03,343 --> 00:47:04,509 He's amazing. 1040 00:47:04,511 --> 00:47:10,883 My son, you may rest now. 1041 00:47:10,885 --> 00:47:14,385 Your work is done. 1042 00:47:14,387 --> 00:47:15,791 Give me the trimmer. 1043 00:47:25,701 --> 00:47:28,669 That's it. 1044 00:47:28,671 --> 00:47:31,371 Well done, Timmy. 1045 00:47:31,373 --> 00:47:32,840 Tommy. 1046 00:47:32,842 --> 00:47:33,774 Tommy. 1047 00:47:33,776 --> 00:47:34,777 [growls] 1048 00:47:37,981 --> 00:47:41,582 Hey, tree hugger! 1049 00:47:41,584 --> 00:47:42,583 Oh! 1050 00:47:42,585 --> 00:47:43,852 Got it! 1051 00:47:43,854 --> 00:47:45,453 It's sticky. Take it. 1052 00:47:45,455 --> 00:47:46,287 - Oh, shit. - Dax! 1053 00:47:46,289 --> 00:47:47,421 - Dax! - Go, go, go! 1054 00:47:47,423 --> 00:47:48,058 Run! 1055 00:47:51,696 --> 00:47:52,662 Come on! Come on! 1056 00:47:52,664 --> 00:47:53,528 Come on! 1057 00:47:53,530 --> 00:47:55,199 I'm going as fast as I can. 1058 00:48:03,541 --> 00:48:04,442 [yelling] 1059 00:48:13,753 --> 00:48:16,054 Holy... Holy shit! 1060 00:48:16,056 --> 00:48:19,556 Hey, look, I'm sorry, but I killed your ass! 1061 00:48:19,558 --> 00:48:20,759 Woo! 1062 00:48:20,761 --> 00:48:21,960 Woo! 1063 00:48:21,962 --> 00:48:23,396 That's what I'm talking about! 1064 00:48:27,300 --> 00:48:28,034 Woo! 1065 00:48:28,036 --> 00:48:29,601 The virgin took him out! 1066 00:48:29,603 --> 00:48:30,568 You're the best! 1067 00:48:30,570 --> 00:48:31,503 Oh, hi. 1068 00:48:31,505 --> 00:48:32,805 Hey. 1069 00:48:32,807 --> 00:48:34,073 Are you OK? 1070 00:48:34,075 --> 00:48:35,941 Yeah. 1071 00:48:35,943 --> 00:48:37,177 Thank you. 1072 00:48:39,815 --> 00:48:42,348 Hey, this goes down. 1073 00:48:42,350 --> 00:48:43,649 So? 1074 00:48:43,651 --> 00:48:45,886 It could be a tunnel system for maintenance 1075 00:48:45,888 --> 00:48:47,020 for the grounds. 1076 00:48:47,022 --> 00:48:48,220 Do you think it's safer down there? 1077 00:48:48,222 --> 00:48:50,658 Would you rather be in Blood Fest or below it? 1078 00:49:02,706 --> 00:49:03,972 It's locked. 1079 00:49:03,974 --> 00:49:05,941 Wait, wait, wait, wait. 1080 00:49:05,943 --> 00:49:08,376 I can unlock this. 1081 00:49:08,378 --> 00:49:09,577 You have a lock-picking kit? 1082 00:49:09,579 --> 00:49:10,478 You don't? 1083 00:49:10,480 --> 00:49:11,347 Of course. 1084 00:49:13,516 --> 00:49:17,087 That was some amazing directing back there. 1085 00:49:17,089 --> 00:49:20,056 Where did you get those skills? 1086 00:49:20,058 --> 00:49:22,624 I've seen a lot of movies. 1087 00:49:22,626 --> 00:49:25,128 And my mom, she loved them, and especially 1088 00:49:25,130 --> 00:49:26,730 the black and white ones. 1089 00:49:26,732 --> 00:49:29,734 You know, Universal, Val Lewton. 1090 00:49:29,736 --> 00:49:31,434 We used to watch them all night. 1091 00:49:31,436 --> 00:49:32,770 Huh. 1092 00:49:32,772 --> 00:49:34,772 Well, that is some A-plus parenting right there. 1093 00:49:34,774 --> 00:49:36,941 I mean... 1094 00:49:36,943 --> 00:49:39,410 She was murdered. 1095 00:49:39,412 --> 00:49:40,145 What? 1096 00:49:40,147 --> 00:49:41,378 Oh, God. 1097 00:49:41,380 --> 00:49:42,147 I'm sorry. 1098 00:49:42,149 --> 00:49:42,748 Jesus. 1099 00:49:42,750 --> 00:49:44,816 It's fine. 1100 00:49:44,818 --> 00:49:51,656 You know, for a while, I was so afraid. 1101 00:49:51,658 --> 00:49:57,096 Everything scared me... everything except movies. 1102 00:49:57,098 --> 00:49:58,396 Now, movies I knew that the blood 1103 00:49:58,398 --> 00:50:01,801 was fake, that the daggers were made of rubber. 1104 00:50:01,803 --> 00:50:05,038 It was kind of like I could play with fear, you know? 1105 00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:07,141 I could sit in the dark for an hour or two. 1106 00:50:07,143 --> 00:50:08,508 I could scream, I could jump, I could 1107 00:50:08,510 --> 00:50:12,578 laugh and know that everything was going to be OK. 1108 00:50:12,580 --> 00:50:13,781 I don't know. 1109 00:50:13,783 --> 00:50:14,848 There's something honest about those movies. 1110 00:50:14,850 --> 00:50:15,817 [chuckle] 1111 00:50:15,819 --> 00:50:17,451 Honest? 1112 00:50:17,453 --> 00:50:20,021 Those films are ridiculous! 1113 00:50:20,023 --> 00:50:21,923 In "Arbor Day," "Friday the 13th," 1114 00:50:21,925 --> 00:50:23,792 "Halloween," it doesn't matter where you run 1115 00:50:23,794 --> 00:50:27,897 or where you hide, death is always going to get you. 1116 00:50:27,899 --> 00:50:32,634 And even if you do survive, you'll just die in the sequel. 1117 00:50:32,636 --> 00:50:34,870 So death is inevitable? 1118 00:50:34,872 --> 00:50:38,007 That's the takeaway? 1119 00:50:38,009 --> 00:50:40,543 I don't know. 1120 00:50:40,545 --> 00:50:44,080 Gotta live while you can, I guess. 1121 00:50:44,082 --> 00:50:47,984 Make the most of what little screen time you got? 1122 00:50:47,986 --> 00:50:50,153 Is that what you do? 1123 00:50:50,155 --> 00:50:51,390 Live life to the fullest? 1124 00:50:57,596 --> 00:50:58,630 Not even close. 1125 00:51:05,638 --> 00:51:08,639 Who knew Arbor Day was so life affirming! 1126 00:51:08,641 --> 00:51:10,010 [chuckles] 1127 00:51:11,611 --> 00:51:12,445 KRILL: Got it. 1128 00:51:15,749 --> 00:51:17,618 Uh, you first, Dax. 1129 00:51:32,834 --> 00:51:33,668 Hello? 1130 00:51:38,773 --> 00:51:40,909 Now this is pleasant. 1131 00:51:40,911 --> 00:51:44,045 Looks like the matinee crowd. 1132 00:51:44,047 --> 00:51:45,615 Where the hell are we? 1133 00:51:48,285 --> 00:51:51,686 Thought I'd be safer down here. 1134 00:51:51,688 --> 00:51:52,787 Not safer, unsafer! 1135 00:51:52,789 --> 00:51:54,090 We gotta turn back, Dax! 1136 00:51:54,092 --> 00:51:57,126 No, we keep going. 1137 00:51:57,128 --> 00:51:59,095 Tortureville leads to Clown Town. 1138 00:51:59,097 --> 00:52:00,930 Clowns! Clowns! 1139 00:52:00,932 --> 00:52:02,064 And past Clown Town is the service 1140 00:52:02,066 --> 00:52:03,733 gate Ashley came through. 1141 00:52:03,735 --> 00:52:04,700 We're close. 1142 00:52:04,702 --> 00:52:07,204 We're dead. 1143 00:52:07,206 --> 00:52:08,804 Just don't touch anything. 1144 00:52:08,806 --> 00:52:09,674 OK? 1145 00:52:24,790 --> 00:52:26,257 I owe you an apology. 1146 00:52:26,259 --> 00:52:28,559 If I hadn't hounded you, you'd be at home 1147 00:52:28,561 --> 00:52:30,595 right now, safe on your couch. 1148 00:52:30,597 --> 00:52:31,829 Sam, is it weren't for you, I'd 1149 00:52:31,831 --> 00:52:33,631 always be at home on my couch. 1150 00:52:33,633 --> 00:52:36,768 And I'd rather be right here... 1151 00:52:36,770 --> 00:52:38,803 with you. 1152 00:52:38,805 --> 00:52:41,074 MAN: Help! 1153 00:52:41,076 --> 00:52:43,176 Guys, guys, don't... 1154 00:52:43,178 --> 00:52:44,277 we shouldn't go that way. 1155 00:52:44,279 --> 00:52:46,046 It could be a trap. 1156 00:52:46,048 --> 00:52:47,613 MAN: Somebody! 1157 00:52:47,615 --> 00:52:48,814 Help! 1158 00:52:48,816 --> 00:52:50,951 I've seen too many people died tonight. 1159 00:52:50,953 --> 00:52:51,918 No more. 1160 00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:52,886 Sam... 1161 00:52:52,888 --> 00:52:53,988 - Hey, let's... - Hey, Sam! 1162 00:52:53,990 --> 00:52:54,823 Let's not... 1163 00:53:02,831 --> 00:53:04,066 TRAPPER: Please! Help! 1164 00:53:04,068 --> 00:53:05,135 Somebody! 1165 00:53:08,305 --> 00:53:09,870 Oh, thank you. Thank you. 1166 00:53:09,872 --> 00:53:10,740 Thank you. 1167 00:53:14,711 --> 00:53:17,846 MR. LEADFOOT: When it strikes 12, the game is through. 1168 00:53:17,848 --> 00:53:21,184 These chains will rip up a man in two. 1169 00:53:21,186 --> 00:53:24,020 Please, you got to get me out of here. 1170 00:53:24,022 --> 00:53:24,886 But you... you worked her. 1171 00:53:24,888 --> 00:53:26,055 You... you're a part of this. 1172 00:53:26,057 --> 00:53:29,926 I sell fucking hot dogs, scan bands. 1173 00:53:29,928 --> 00:53:31,828 I wasn't even paid! 1174 00:53:31,830 --> 00:53:33,197 I did it for a wristband. 1175 00:53:33,199 --> 00:53:35,932 Please, help me. 1176 00:53:35,934 --> 00:53:36,833 Wh... what do I do? 1177 00:53:36,835 --> 00:53:38,901 Over there against the wall. 1178 00:53:38,903 --> 00:53:40,771 There's a button in the box. 1179 00:53:40,773 --> 00:53:41,939 OK. I got it. 1180 00:53:41,941 --> 00:53:43,174 You gotta hit them at the same time. 1181 00:53:43,176 --> 00:53:45,076 Please hurry! 1182 00:53:45,078 --> 00:53:45,911 Ah! 1183 00:53:56,190 --> 00:53:57,089 Sorry. 1184 00:53:57,091 --> 00:53:57,958 What? 1185 00:54:00,128 --> 00:54:00,961 Sam? 1186 00:54:09,937 --> 00:54:11,670 Who the fuck is Mr. Leadfeet? 1187 00:54:11,672 --> 00:54:12,406 Come on. 1188 00:54:12,408 --> 00:54:15,076 In here. 1189 00:54:15,078 --> 00:54:16,077 Hey! 1190 00:54:16,079 --> 00:54:17,646 Hey, mother fucker! 1191 00:54:20,350 --> 00:54:21,681 Sam, what's going on? 1192 00:54:21,683 --> 00:54:23,016 Dax! 1193 00:54:23,018 --> 00:54:23,950 Uh! 1194 00:54:23,952 --> 00:54:27,356 So much blood. 1195 00:54:27,358 --> 00:54:29,224 Ah! 1196 00:54:29,226 --> 00:54:30,858 - Ah! - What's happening? 1197 00:54:30,860 --> 00:54:31,959 I traded places with him. 1198 00:54:31,961 --> 00:54:32,794 It was dumb. 1199 00:54:32,796 --> 00:54:33,961 It was... it was so stupid. 1200 00:54:33,963 --> 00:54:34,831 What? 1201 00:54:39,204 --> 00:54:40,272 Oh, shit! 1202 00:54:43,841 --> 00:54:45,808 It won't budge! 1203 00:54:45,810 --> 00:54:47,042 We're fucking stuck. 1204 00:54:47,044 --> 00:54:48,111 We're stuck, Ash. 1205 00:54:48,113 --> 00:54:50,916 We're... Ashley? 1206 00:54:55,121 --> 00:54:57,288 We're never getting out of here. 1207 00:54:57,290 --> 00:54:58,489 We are. We are! 1208 00:54:58,491 --> 00:55:00,291 We just gotta get to the other warehouse. 1209 00:55:00,293 --> 00:55:02,093 And I'll use the card to hack it. 1210 00:55:02,095 --> 00:55:05,397 And we'll be free, I promise. 1211 00:55:05,399 --> 00:55:08,866 Lenjamin had it. 1212 00:55:08,868 --> 00:55:11,203 Oh, crap. 1213 00:55:11,205 --> 00:55:12,237 Um, OK. 1214 00:55:12,239 --> 00:55:14,306 We'll find another way out of here. 1215 00:55:14,308 --> 00:55:16,975 I'm gonna to die. 1216 00:55:16,977 --> 00:55:21,481 And I can't die like this, covered in dirt and filth 1217 00:55:21,483 --> 00:55:25,750 and Zachary Levi's blood on me! 1218 00:55:25,752 --> 00:55:27,722 You could always take a shower. 1219 00:55:31,360 --> 00:55:33,427 You're right. 1220 00:55:33,429 --> 00:55:36,095 No, no, no, no, that's actually not a good idea. 1221 00:55:36,097 --> 00:55:37,131 That's just what I need. 1222 00:55:37,133 --> 00:55:38,932 No, no, I was kidding. 1223 00:55:38,934 --> 00:55:39,700 Ashley, please. 1224 00:55:39,702 --> 00:55:41,136 Think about the rules. 1225 00:55:41,138 --> 00:55:42,903 I'm sick of the rules, Krill. 1226 00:55:42,905 --> 00:55:45,038 I'm sick of people telling me what to do. 1227 00:55:45,040 --> 00:55:46,940 No, no! 1228 00:55:46,942 --> 00:55:48,909 Oh, my God. 1229 00:55:48,911 --> 00:55:50,777 Uh, hot water. 1230 00:55:50,779 --> 00:55:51,681 Thank God. 1231 00:55:54,519 --> 00:55:55,251 Uh! 1232 00:55:55,253 --> 00:55:57,486 That feels so good! 1233 00:55:57,488 --> 00:55:58,686 Oh, oh. 1234 00:55:58,688 --> 00:56:00,121 I thought you were just washing your face. 1235 00:56:00,123 --> 00:56:03,527 You know, all my life, I've acted the way other people 1236 00:56:03,529 --> 00:56:06,795 wanted me to act, dressed the way 1237 00:56:06,797 --> 00:56:10,467 other people wanted me to dress, wasted time 1238 00:56:10,469 --> 00:56:13,370 with dicks like Lenjamin Cain. 1239 00:56:13,372 --> 00:56:15,473 I'm gonna start doing what I want to do. 1240 00:56:15,475 --> 00:56:17,941 Be with guys that I want to be with. 1241 00:56:17,943 --> 00:56:18,844 Good guys. 1242 00:56:22,147 --> 00:56:23,079 Hey, Krill? 1243 00:56:23,081 --> 00:56:24,448 Yeah. 1244 00:56:24,450 --> 00:56:27,319 Do you think I'm shallow? 1245 00:56:27,321 --> 00:56:28,554 Shallow? 1246 00:56:28,556 --> 00:56:32,089 I'm just here because I want to be famous. 1247 00:56:32,091 --> 00:56:33,726 How fucking shallow is that? 1248 00:56:36,230 --> 00:56:39,965 Well, I just came here to get laid, so... 1249 00:56:39,967 --> 00:56:43,168 and hear... and hear you speak at your panel. 1250 00:56:43,170 --> 00:56:46,104 I... I like hearing you talk. 1251 00:56:46,106 --> 00:56:48,374 I'd watch you on anything... 1252 00:56:48,376 --> 00:56:51,378 A Tommy Wiseau movie, a driver's ed video. 1253 00:56:51,380 --> 00:56:54,113 I'd watch you in a commercial for granola, 1254 00:56:54,115 --> 00:56:55,717 and I hate granola. 1255 00:56:58,287 --> 00:56:59,320 Hey, Krill. 1256 00:56:59,322 --> 00:57:01,854 Yeah? 1257 00:57:01,856 --> 00:57:04,927 Maybe we could still make one of our dreams come true? 1258 00:57:08,197 --> 00:57:09,464 Stop! 1259 00:57:09,466 --> 00:57:10,665 OK, OK, OK, OK. 1260 00:57:10,667 --> 00:57:11,732 We, uh, we... we gotta call help, right? 1261 00:57:11,734 --> 00:57:12,667 Maybe we should trick somebody else. 1262 00:57:12,669 --> 00:57:15,471 No, no, no, no, I won't do that! 1263 00:57:15,473 --> 00:57:17,273 You can't cheat time. 1264 00:57:17,275 --> 00:57:18,974 That just won't do. 1265 00:57:18,976 --> 00:57:23,144 But time will always cheat on you. 1266 00:57:23,146 --> 00:57:25,013 [screams] 1267 00:57:25,015 --> 00:57:26,014 Sorry! 1268 00:57:26,016 --> 00:57:27,116 Oh, God. Sam, what do I do? 1269 00:57:27,118 --> 00:57:27,950 - What do I do? - Dax, I don't know! 1270 00:57:27,952 --> 00:57:28,685 OK? I don't know! 1271 00:57:28,687 --> 00:57:30,554 This is going to hurt! 1272 00:57:30,556 --> 00:57:31,555 This is going to hurt! 1273 00:57:31,557 --> 00:57:32,989 - This is going to hurt! - Dax! 1274 00:57:32,991 --> 00:57:33,889 Dax! Dax! 1275 00:57:33,891 --> 00:57:35,091 OK? 1276 00:57:35,093 --> 00:57:35,825 Hey, you've got to get them out of here. 1277 00:57:35,827 --> 00:57:37,159 Find that back gate. 1278 00:57:37,161 --> 00:57:38,094 Get the... 1279 00:57:38,096 --> 00:57:39,162 - [screams] - Hey, hey, hey! 1280 00:57:39,164 --> 00:57:40,130 Hey, hey, hey! 1281 00:57:40,132 --> 00:57:41,198 Listen to me. 1282 00:57:41,200 --> 00:57:42,165 I'm right here. 1283 00:57:42,167 --> 00:57:43,166 What can I do? 1284 00:57:43,168 --> 00:57:44,036 I'm scared. 1285 00:57:50,910 --> 00:57:51,778 It's OK. 1286 00:57:57,685 --> 00:57:58,417 Oh. 1287 00:57:58,419 --> 00:58:00,118 No, no, no, no, no, no... 1288 00:58:00,120 --> 00:58:01,420 Stop. 1289 00:58:01,422 --> 00:58:03,590 You were right. 1290 00:58:03,592 --> 00:58:07,594 Everybody gets a shot at redemption. 1291 00:58:07,596 --> 00:58:10,363 You know, I think they're going to need another poor bastard 1292 00:58:10,365 --> 00:58:13,333 to play Timmy Wakes. 1293 00:58:13,335 --> 00:58:14,301 Tommy. 1294 00:58:14,303 --> 00:58:15,137 Tommy. 1295 00:58:20,510 --> 00:58:24,412 About to get pruned, punk. 1296 00:58:24,414 --> 00:58:25,981 He said it. 1297 00:58:39,296 --> 00:58:44,166 The glorification of violence, the over-sexualized crowds, 1298 00:58:44,168 --> 00:58:49,271 the rampant exploration of humanity's darkest sides... 1299 00:58:49,273 --> 00:58:50,973 this is what horror gives us. 1300 00:58:50,975 --> 00:58:57,450 Horror begets horror, especially in the... 1301 00:59:00,151 --> 00:59:02,251 especially in the young. 1302 00:59:02,253 --> 00:59:04,121 Are you all right, Dr. Conway? 1303 00:59:04,123 --> 00:59:05,189 Sorry, yeah. 1304 00:59:05,191 --> 00:59:08,025 Just my son was supposed to join us. 1305 00:59:08,027 --> 00:59:10,060 I... I'm fine. 1306 00:59:10,062 --> 00:59:13,598 Doctor, perhaps you are exaggerating the issue? 1307 00:59:13,600 --> 00:59:14,899 Blood Fest is a... 1308 00:59:14,901 --> 00:59:19,172 Blood Fest is a deadly tragedy waiting to happen. 1309 00:59:22,342 --> 00:59:24,177 I wouldn't let my children... 1310 00:59:27,014 --> 00:59:33,052 I wouldn't let... excuse me just for a minute. 1311 00:59:33,054 --> 00:59:35,154 We're actually broadcasting live. 1312 00:59:35,156 --> 00:59:38,425 So... Dr. Conway? 1313 00:59:38,427 --> 00:59:39,261 Krill? 1314 00:59:42,030 --> 00:59:42,898 Ashley? 1315 00:59:46,569 --> 00:59:47,903 Have you tried... 1316 00:59:52,041 --> 00:59:54,308 Oh. 1317 00:59:54,310 --> 00:59:55,178 You are amazing. 1318 00:59:58,114 --> 00:59:58,948 Ashley! 1319 01:00:03,455 --> 01:00:05,287 - Where have you guys been? - We were stuck in the bathroom. 1320 01:00:05,289 --> 01:00:06,157 We weren't doing anything. 1321 01:00:10,227 --> 01:00:11,795 Hinckley is dead. 1322 01:00:11,797 --> 01:00:13,563 Oh, God! 1323 01:00:13,565 --> 01:00:14,665 Yeah, we got to move now. 1324 01:00:14,667 --> 01:00:17,066 We got to get to this warehouse. 1325 01:00:17,068 --> 01:00:17,936 About that? 1326 01:00:20,506 --> 01:00:23,841 Lenjamin, he had the key card. 1327 01:00:23,843 --> 01:00:25,509 And you're only telling us now. 1328 01:00:25,511 --> 01:00:27,344 I just thought another solution would pop up. 1329 01:00:27,346 --> 01:00:28,513 Don't get mad at her! 1330 01:00:28,515 --> 01:00:29,581 I'm sure as hell getting mad at her! 1331 01:00:29,583 --> 01:00:32,216 Dad was right! 1332 01:00:32,218 --> 01:00:37,221 All these monsters, these nightmares... 1333 01:00:37,223 --> 01:00:38,389 and we paid for it. 1334 01:00:38,391 --> 01:00:39,259 We enjoy it. 1335 01:00:42,429 --> 01:00:44,064 And now it's going to kill us. 1336 01:00:48,402 --> 01:00:50,402 Speaking of. 1337 01:00:50,404 --> 01:00:51,472 Come on! 1338 01:00:51,474 --> 01:00:52,371 Go! 1339 01:00:52,373 --> 01:00:53,439 Go! 1340 01:00:53,441 --> 01:00:54,373 Go! 1341 01:00:54,375 --> 01:00:56,844 Go! 1342 01:00:56,846 --> 01:00:57,744 Which way? 1343 01:00:57,746 --> 01:00:59,111 Come on! Go, go, go! 1344 01:00:59,113 --> 01:00:59,813 Come on! 1345 01:00:59,815 --> 01:01:00,914 Run! 1346 01:01:00,916 --> 01:01:02,248 - Hurry up! - Go, go, go, go, go! 1347 01:01:02,250 --> 01:01:03,152 Right here! 1348 01:01:06,823 --> 01:01:08,255 - Come on! - Come on! 1349 01:01:08,257 --> 01:01:09,156 Come on! Block the door! 1350 01:01:09,158 --> 01:01:10,123 Block the door! 1351 01:01:10,125 --> 01:01:11,024 Block the door! 1352 01:01:11,026 --> 01:01:12,059 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! 1353 01:01:12,061 --> 01:01:13,093 These barrels are rigged to blow! 1354 01:01:13,095 --> 01:01:13,895 These were all over the grounds. 1355 01:01:13,897 --> 01:01:15,531 Up the ladder! Go! 1356 01:01:15,533 --> 01:01:16,264 Go! 1357 01:01:16,266 --> 01:01:17,500 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 1358 01:01:17,502 --> 01:01:18,567 You don't go upstairs in a fucking scary movie! 1359 01:01:18,569 --> 01:01:19,467 You do when you're in a dungeon. 1360 01:01:19,469 --> 01:01:21,369 - Now just go! - Come on! 1361 01:01:21,371 --> 01:01:23,139 Go, Krill! You've got this! 1362 01:01:25,877 --> 01:01:27,109 Oh. 1363 01:01:27,111 --> 01:01:29,411 It smells like cotton candy and death in here. 1364 01:01:29,413 --> 01:01:30,814 They get into the skull just fine, 1365 01:01:30,816 --> 01:01:32,281 but they get stuck in there. 1366 01:01:32,283 --> 01:01:34,383 All the gears get gummed up. 1367 01:01:34,385 --> 01:01:35,384 OK, keep working on it. 1368 01:01:35,386 --> 01:01:36,620 Yes, sir. 1369 01:01:36,622 --> 01:01:37,689 Mac, talk to me! 1370 01:01:41,694 --> 01:01:43,694 Almost done cutting the first half. 1371 01:01:43,696 --> 01:01:44,427 Little faster! 1372 01:01:44,429 --> 01:01:45,596 Kill your darlings! 1373 01:01:45,598 --> 01:01:46,831 Sir! 1374 01:01:46,833 --> 01:01:47,899 Sir! 1375 01:01:47,901 --> 01:01:49,366 The containment system just failed. 1376 01:01:49,368 --> 01:01:53,271 We have principals leaving their zones all over the grounds. 1377 01:01:53,273 --> 01:01:56,207 Life finds a way. 1378 01:01:56,209 --> 01:01:57,241 I'm on it. 1379 01:01:57,243 --> 01:01:58,610 Well, wait, wait, wait. 1380 01:01:58,612 --> 01:02:01,580 I've always loved a genre mash. 1381 01:02:01,582 --> 01:02:02,651 Let's just see what happens! 1382 01:02:21,336 --> 01:02:22,302 Not good. 1383 01:02:22,304 --> 01:02:23,202 Not good. 1384 01:02:23,204 --> 01:02:23,904 Not good. 1385 01:02:23,906 --> 01:02:25,471 Krill, calm down. 1386 01:02:25,473 --> 01:02:26,473 There's no one even in here. 1387 01:02:26,475 --> 01:02:27,576 We're OK. 1388 01:02:27,578 --> 01:02:30,146 [suspenseful music] 1389 01:02:38,823 --> 01:02:40,488 This is not good. 1390 01:02:40,490 --> 01:02:41,489 This is not good. 1391 01:02:41,491 --> 01:02:43,525 It's not good. 1392 01:02:43,527 --> 01:02:44,492 Ah! 1393 01:02:44,494 --> 01:02:45,761 Oh, my God! 1394 01:02:45,763 --> 01:02:48,631 Oh, my God! 1395 01:02:48,633 --> 01:02:49,732 What do we do? 1396 01:02:49,734 --> 01:02:50,634 What are the rules? 1397 01:02:50,636 --> 01:02:52,636 There's no rules with clowns! 1398 01:02:52,638 --> 01:02:54,638 They'll cut your throat, make a balloon animal, 1399 01:02:54,640 --> 01:02:55,639 and shit in your mouth. 1400 01:02:55,641 --> 01:02:56,673 They don't care! 1401 01:02:56,675 --> 01:02:58,242 I fucking hate them! 1402 01:03:01,346 --> 01:03:05,349 [evil laugh] 1403 01:03:05,351 --> 01:03:07,317 Oh, my God. 1404 01:03:07,319 --> 01:03:08,653 Ah! 1405 01:03:08,655 --> 01:03:10,655 [evil laugh] 1406 01:03:10,657 --> 01:03:12,257 We are so fucked. 1407 01:03:20,266 --> 01:03:22,600 Oh, dude! 1408 01:03:22,602 --> 01:03:24,672 Do you hear something? 1409 01:03:31,647 --> 01:03:32,480 Zombies! 1410 01:03:37,052 --> 01:03:38,551 Oh, my God! 1411 01:03:38,553 --> 01:03:41,456 [heavy metal music playing] 1412 01:03:45,560 --> 01:03:46,461 Let's move! 1413 01:03:49,999 --> 01:03:52,936 [evil laugh] 1414 01:04:04,849 --> 01:04:07,449 KRILL: The scissor clown super clown! 1415 01:04:07,451 --> 01:04:08,383 Back off! 1416 01:04:08,385 --> 01:04:09,453 This one's mine! 1417 01:04:19,664 --> 01:04:21,699 Lenjamin? 1418 01:04:21,701 --> 01:04:23,332 Ashley! No! 1419 01:04:23,334 --> 01:04:24,367 No! Ash... 1420 01:04:24,369 --> 01:04:25,803 - What is she doing? - Got it! 1421 01:04:25,805 --> 01:04:27,337 No, no, no! 1422 01:04:27,339 --> 01:04:28,338 Ashley! 1423 01:04:28,340 --> 01:04:29,074 Ashley! 1424 01:04:29,076 --> 01:04:29,943 No! 1425 01:04:32,779 --> 01:04:34,079 We gotta... 1426 01:04:34,081 --> 01:04:35,579 We gotta go. 1427 01:04:35,581 --> 01:04:36,580 I'm sorry. 1428 01:04:36,582 --> 01:04:37,483 I'm sorry. 1429 01:04:41,789 --> 01:04:42,755 Hey, boy! 1430 01:04:42,757 --> 01:04:44,489 How's it going in there? 1431 01:04:44,491 --> 01:04:45,423 Aw, dude! 1432 01:04:45,425 --> 01:04:48,060 This clown level is fucking dope! 1433 01:04:48,062 --> 01:04:49,461 I noticed that you were... 1434 01:04:49,463 --> 01:04:51,397 [laughter] 1435 01:04:51,399 --> 01:04:57,003 ...killing all my clowns, which I'm kind of pisses me off. 1436 01:04:57,005 --> 01:04:58,571 I think it's time we unplugged. 1437 01:04:58,573 --> 01:04:59,407 Amy? 1438 01:05:03,645 --> 01:05:05,880 Thanks for playing, cockbites. 1439 01:05:05,882 --> 01:05:09,751 Oh, what a fucking chaod! 1440 01:05:09,753 --> 01:05:11,553 I think I see it. 1441 01:05:14,892 --> 01:05:17,860 The yellow warehouse... just like she said. 1442 01:05:17,862 --> 01:05:18,927 We made it. 1443 01:05:18,929 --> 01:05:19,828 Let's get inside, hack the door, 1444 01:05:19,830 --> 01:05:21,531 and get the hell out of here! 1445 01:05:29,406 --> 01:05:30,173 Hey! 1446 01:05:30,175 --> 01:05:31,440 You got out of there. 1447 01:05:31,442 --> 01:05:33,542 That's... that's great! 1448 01:05:33,544 --> 01:05:34,543 Son of a bitch! 1449 01:05:34,545 --> 01:05:36,411 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 1450 01:05:36,413 --> 01:05:41,051 Can we save kicking my ass until we get out of here? 1451 01:05:41,053 --> 01:05:42,418 I know where the door is. 1452 01:05:42,420 --> 01:05:43,055 Huh? 1453 01:05:46,491 --> 01:05:47,557 I... I can't get it open. 1454 01:05:47,559 --> 01:05:49,626 You need a key card or something. 1455 01:05:49,628 --> 01:05:51,129 - On it. - Oh, God. 1456 01:05:51,131 --> 01:05:52,864 You have a key card, yes! 1457 01:05:52,866 --> 01:05:54,465 ALARM SYSTEM: Enter security code. 1458 01:05:54,467 --> 01:05:55,301 Hold on. 1459 01:05:58,972 --> 01:05:59,973 DAX: Can you do it, Krill? 1460 01:06:02,509 --> 01:06:03,441 Yeah. 1461 01:06:03,443 --> 01:06:04,309 I can hack it. 1462 01:06:04,311 --> 01:06:05,512 I ju... I... I just need a second. 1463 01:06:09,050 --> 01:06:09,951 Come on. 1464 01:06:17,860 --> 01:06:18,859 Hey. 1465 01:06:18,861 --> 01:06:19,929 Check it out. 1466 01:06:22,832 --> 01:06:25,598 Don't jinx it, please. 1467 01:06:25,600 --> 01:06:28,004 [evil laugh] 1468 01:06:31,607 --> 01:06:32,606 Krill? 1469 01:06:32,608 --> 01:06:33,574 Yeah, I'm almost there. 1470 01:06:33,576 --> 01:06:35,243 Just wait. 1471 01:06:35,245 --> 01:06:36,177 Krill! 1472 01:06:36,179 --> 01:06:37,045 I got it. 1473 01:06:37,047 --> 01:06:39,714 Just... just one more second! 1474 01:06:39,716 --> 01:06:40,682 DAX: Krill! 1475 01:06:40,684 --> 01:06:42,784 What? 1476 01:06:42,786 --> 01:06:43,653 Hey. 1477 01:06:46,090 --> 01:06:47,622 It's cool. It's cool. 1478 01:06:47,624 --> 01:06:48,891 I know her. 1479 01:06:48,893 --> 01:06:49,824 DAX: What? 1480 01:06:49,826 --> 01:06:51,228 Hey. 1481 01:06:51,230 --> 01:06:53,029 You made it. 1482 01:06:53,031 --> 01:06:56,933 I try to stay away, but I couldn't. 1483 01:06:56,935 --> 01:07:00,571 Uh, my sweet little virgin. 1484 01:07:03,042 --> 01:07:07,146 Actually, I... never mind. 1485 01:07:12,018 --> 01:07:14,554 You have a little something... 1486 01:07:20,560 --> 01:07:21,659 You... you... you got it. 1487 01:07:21,661 --> 01:07:22,895 Run! Run! 1488 01:07:22,897 --> 01:07:23,896 Run! 1489 01:07:23,898 --> 01:07:24,932 Ah! 1490 01:07:33,308 --> 01:07:34,274 No! 1491 01:07:34,276 --> 01:07:36,109 Krill! 1492 01:07:36,111 --> 01:07:38,778 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 1493 01:07:38,780 --> 01:07:39,746 Oh, fuck. 1494 01:07:39,748 --> 01:07:40,682 Oh, fuck. 1495 01:07:51,061 --> 01:07:55,163 It didn't have to be a wooden stake. 1496 01:07:55,165 --> 01:07:57,898 Seemed to do the trick, bitch. 1497 01:07:57,900 --> 01:07:59,935 Ah! 1498 01:07:59,937 --> 01:08:00,868 Ah! 1499 01:08:00,870 --> 01:08:01,802 Ah! 1500 01:08:01,804 --> 01:08:03,838 Ah! 1501 01:08:03,840 --> 01:08:04,839 Ah! 1502 01:08:04,841 --> 01:08:05,742 [screams] 1503 01:08:13,084 --> 01:08:14,884 Is going to be OK, all right? 1504 01:08:14,886 --> 01:08:17,586 Don't... don't... don't say that. 1505 01:08:17,588 --> 01:08:20,991 Th... that usually means I'm dead. 1506 01:08:20,993 --> 01:08:22,658 Oh, come on, man. 1507 01:08:22,660 --> 01:08:23,592 Come on, Krill. 1508 01:08:23,594 --> 01:08:24,462 We need you! 1509 01:08:31,371 --> 01:08:32,869 Come on, man. 1510 01:08:32,871 --> 01:08:33,904 You'll be OK. 1511 01:08:33,906 --> 01:08:35,641 The virgin always survives, right? 1512 01:08:38,379 --> 01:08:42,116 Then... then I guess I'm a dead man. 1513 01:09:00,268 --> 01:09:01,633 ALARM SYSTEM: Access granted. 1514 01:09:01,635 --> 01:09:02,936 It's open. 1515 01:09:02,938 --> 01:09:03,937 It's open! 1516 01:09:03,939 --> 01:09:06,407 [buzzing] 1517 01:09:06,409 --> 01:09:07,907 Oh, shit! 1518 01:09:07,909 --> 01:09:08,908 Dad? 1519 01:09:08,910 --> 01:09:10,311 Dax. 1520 01:09:10,313 --> 01:09:11,479 How did you... 1521 01:09:11,481 --> 01:09:12,346 - Everybody's dying in here! - It's OK. 1522 01:09:12,348 --> 01:09:12,946 It's going to be all right. 1523 01:09:12,948 --> 01:09:15,683 Don't worry. 1524 01:09:15,685 --> 01:09:16,650 Yes! 1525 01:09:16,652 --> 01:09:17,818 You got a gun! 1526 01:09:17,820 --> 01:09:19,820 Dad, you' were right. 1527 01:09:19,822 --> 01:09:22,057 You were right about everything. 1528 01:09:22,059 --> 01:09:24,725 [muffled screams] 1529 01:09:24,727 --> 01:09:25,926 Sam! Stop! 1530 01:09:25,928 --> 01:09:27,063 Shoot him! 1531 01:09:27,065 --> 01:09:28,997 Unload the fucking clip! 1532 01:09:28,999 --> 01:09:30,299 DAX: You'll hit her. 1533 01:09:30,301 --> 01:09:35,371 I will never do anything that would hurt you, OK? 1534 01:09:35,373 --> 01:09:36,439 Do it. 1535 01:09:36,441 --> 01:09:37,340 Do it! 1536 01:09:37,342 --> 01:09:38,210 Do it! 1537 01:09:43,115 --> 01:09:44,847 DAX: What? 1538 01:09:44,849 --> 01:09:46,183 - Dad... - It's OK, Dax. 1539 01:09:46,185 --> 01:09:47,784 You can look. You're old enough. 1540 01:09:47,786 --> 01:09:48,653 [gunshot] 1541 01:09:50,290 --> 01:09:51,158 OK. 1542 01:09:54,727 --> 01:09:56,061 Jayme. 1543 01:09:56,063 --> 01:09:58,231 This is going to take some time to process, Dax. 1544 01:10:01,201 --> 01:10:02,967 But I told you... 1545 01:10:02,969 --> 01:10:04,869 I told all of you... 1546 01:10:04,871 --> 01:10:06,472 these films, they're dangerous. 1547 01:10:06,474 --> 01:10:08,706 They're savage. 1548 01:10:08,708 --> 01:10:09,974 But you wouldn't listen. 1549 01:10:09,976 --> 01:10:12,178 None of you would listen! 1550 01:10:12,180 --> 01:10:13,945 Well, you'll listen now. 1551 01:10:13,947 --> 01:10:15,215 They'll never make another horror 1552 01:10:15,217 --> 01:10:16,784 film again... not after tonight. 1553 01:10:19,854 --> 01:10:22,255 You did this because you hate horror movies? 1554 01:10:22,257 --> 01:10:23,624 Horror killed my wife! 1555 01:10:27,130 --> 01:10:30,063 Horror killed your mother. 1556 01:10:30,065 --> 01:10:35,105 So tonight, I kill horror. 1557 01:10:39,909 --> 01:10:41,376 I'm going up to the tower. 1558 01:10:41,378 --> 01:10:44,246 This spectacle has gone on long enough. 1559 01:10:44,248 --> 01:10:45,249 Take care of him. 1560 01:10:47,984 --> 01:10:49,351 Jayme, let her go. 1561 01:10:49,353 --> 01:10:51,154 You should've known, Dax. 1562 01:10:51,156 --> 01:10:53,889 Dad's been planning this for years. 1563 01:10:53,891 --> 01:10:55,057 I've been helping. 1564 01:10:55,059 --> 01:10:57,160 But the masks, th... th... the killing! 1565 01:10:57,162 --> 01:10:58,228 Dad's idea. 1566 01:10:58,230 --> 01:11:00,396 Kind of an experiment... you know, 1567 01:11:00,398 --> 01:11:03,766 become the thing you fear, and you won't feel afraid. 1568 01:11:03,768 --> 01:11:05,402 And I don't. 1569 01:11:05,404 --> 01:11:08,139 Truth is I don't feel much of anything. 1570 01:11:08,141 --> 01:11:11,875 So are you going to kill us too, or w... 1571 01:11:11,877 --> 01:11:12,809 No. 1572 01:11:12,811 --> 01:11:14,979 Maybe her. 1573 01:11:14,981 --> 01:11:17,449 I'm kidding! 1574 01:11:17,451 --> 01:11:19,484 But seriously, you should go. 1575 01:11:19,486 --> 01:11:23,020 Everyone else here is going to die. 1576 01:11:23,022 --> 01:11:24,054 The door's unlocked. 1577 01:11:24,056 --> 01:11:26,192 You should go. 1578 01:11:26,194 --> 01:11:28,927 I'm going to help Dad in the tower. 1579 01:11:28,929 --> 01:11:30,329 Jayme, w... 1580 01:11:30,331 --> 01:11:32,030 I know this is all... 1581 01:11:32,032 --> 01:11:33,266 I don't know... ultraviolent. 1582 01:11:33,268 --> 01:11:36,237 But I did warn you Blood Fest was gonna suck. 1583 01:11:40,808 --> 01:11:41,676 Let's go. 1584 01:11:46,315 --> 01:11:48,080 Thank God it's Friday. 1585 01:11:48,082 --> 01:11:49,516 TGIF. 1586 01:11:49,518 --> 01:11:50,684 So... 1587 01:11:50,686 --> 01:11:53,820 Maybe we could go grab queso or something. 1588 01:11:53,822 --> 01:11:54,955 You love queso? 1589 01:11:54,957 --> 01:11:56,056 I love queso... 1590 01:11:56,058 --> 01:11:57,559 all the dips. 1591 01:11:57,561 --> 01:11:58,393 All the dips? 1592 01:11:58,395 --> 01:12:01,094 Double-dip, triple-dip... 1593 01:12:01,096 --> 01:12:02,030 You can handle all that? 1594 01:12:02,032 --> 01:12:03,031 I can handle... 1595 01:12:03,033 --> 01:12:07,001 oh, oh! 1596 01:12:07,003 --> 01:12:09,103 What just happened? 1597 01:12:09,105 --> 01:12:11,507 Oh, no, no, no, no! 1598 01:12:11,509 --> 01:12:13,275 No fucking way! 1599 01:12:13,277 --> 01:12:15,378 Oh, that was close. 1600 01:12:15,380 --> 01:12:16,145 Hey! 1601 01:12:16,147 --> 01:12:18,113 Open the fucking gate! 1602 01:12:18,115 --> 01:12:20,217 Are you fucking kidding me? 1603 01:12:20,219 --> 01:12:21,253 Fuck! 1604 01:12:37,503 --> 01:12:38,370 I'm sorry. 1605 01:12:38,372 --> 01:12:39,973 This is all because of my dad. 1606 01:12:47,448 --> 01:12:50,983 OK, let's think, huh? 1607 01:12:50,985 --> 01:12:53,353 How do horror movies end? 1608 01:12:53,355 --> 01:12:54,320 There's got to be an answer. 1609 01:12:54,322 --> 01:12:55,988 It doesn't matter. 1610 01:12:55,990 --> 01:12:58,156 Some monster is going to come out of the shadows 1611 01:12:58,158 --> 01:13:01,294 and kill us, rip us apart. 1612 01:13:01,296 --> 01:13:04,531 We might as well just sit here and wait for it. 1613 01:13:04,533 --> 01:13:07,200 OK. 1614 01:13:07,202 --> 01:13:09,168 You know, my mom... 1615 01:13:09,170 --> 01:13:12,205 she always used to say that I'm... 1616 01:13:12,207 --> 01:13:16,378 I'm stronger than anything I'm afraid of. 1617 01:13:16,380 --> 01:13:17,447 It's bullshit. 1618 01:13:20,983 --> 01:13:23,217 We're going to die here. 1619 01:13:23,219 --> 01:13:26,054 Fuck you. 1620 01:13:26,056 --> 01:13:27,523 What? 1621 01:13:27,525 --> 01:13:30,125 Fuck you and your dead mom. 1622 01:13:30,127 --> 01:13:31,360 Whoa. 1623 01:13:31,362 --> 01:13:33,529 We've gone up against clowns and zombies, 1624 01:13:33,531 --> 01:13:37,466 vampires, arborists, and you're still afraid of Daddy? 1625 01:13:37,468 --> 01:13:39,268 Check it out, Dax. 1626 01:13:39,270 --> 01:13:42,572 This is life... right now. 1627 01:13:42,574 --> 01:13:44,341 And you can sit there watching, or you 1628 01:13:44,343 --> 01:13:47,176 can get up and do something. 1629 01:13:47,178 --> 01:13:49,479 Hey, hey, hey, where are you going? 1630 01:13:49,481 --> 01:13:51,982 There's one thing these movies have taught me... 1631 01:13:51,984 --> 01:13:54,385 that you've taught me. 1632 01:13:54,387 --> 01:13:56,654 It's that you can't run away from death. 1633 01:13:56,656 --> 01:13:57,555 So I won't. 1634 01:13:57,557 --> 01:13:59,990 I'm going to run right at it. 1635 01:13:59,992 --> 01:14:01,191 You want to stop Blood Fest? 1636 01:14:01,193 --> 01:14:02,396 You stop whatever's happening in that tower. 1637 01:14:05,031 --> 01:14:12,471 Sam... there are three ways a horror movie ends. 1638 01:14:12,473 --> 01:14:15,274 One, a single hero survives... 1639 01:14:15,276 --> 01:14:19,978 "Halloween," "Chainsaw," "Get Out." 1640 01:14:19,980 --> 01:14:22,014 Two, no one survives... 1641 01:14:22,016 --> 01:14:25,387 "The Thing," "Sinister," "Night of the Living Dead." 1642 01:14:28,223 --> 01:14:31,191 What's the third? 1643 01:14:31,193 --> 01:14:32,027 I don't know. 1644 01:14:35,063 --> 01:14:38,132 Let's go find out. 1645 01:14:38,134 --> 01:14:39,468 Fuck yeah. 1646 01:14:39,470 --> 01:14:42,539 [music playing] 1647 01:15:14,039 --> 01:15:17,442 It's a real shit show out there, Walsh. 1648 01:15:17,444 --> 01:15:19,477 Uh-oh. Doc! 1649 01:15:19,479 --> 01:15:20,612 What are you doing here? 1650 01:15:20,614 --> 01:15:22,680 You're the silent partner, remember? 1651 01:15:22,682 --> 01:15:25,717 Your goddamn festival nearly killed my son. 1652 01:15:25,719 --> 01:15:27,720 Your son? 1653 01:15:27,722 --> 01:15:30,456 He's misguided. 1654 01:15:30,458 --> 01:15:33,057 Loves all this repugnant ghoulishness. 1655 01:15:33,059 --> 01:15:33,826 Hmm. 1656 01:15:33,828 --> 01:15:36,495 Must run in the family. 1657 01:15:36,497 --> 01:15:38,197 - I beg your pardon? - Doc! 1658 01:15:38,199 --> 01:15:39,331 Will you relax? 1659 01:15:39,333 --> 01:15:40,266 Go home! 1660 01:15:40,268 --> 01:15:42,569 This will all be over by morning. 1661 01:15:42,571 --> 01:15:43,737 What's the mortality rate? 1662 01:15:43,739 --> 01:15:44,871 I don't know. 1663 01:15:44,873 --> 01:15:46,673 There's maybe 100 people left alive. 1664 01:15:46,675 --> 01:15:49,108 237. 1665 01:15:49,110 --> 01:15:50,410 Thanks, Amy! 1666 01:15:50,412 --> 01:15:52,179 Did not need that. 1667 01:15:52,181 --> 01:15:53,581 That's too many. 1668 01:15:53,583 --> 01:15:54,649 That is too many. 1669 01:15:54,651 --> 01:15:56,416 I need to get my family and finish this. 1670 01:15:56,418 --> 01:15:57,585 I'm pulling the plug. 1671 01:15:57,587 --> 01:15:59,219 - I'm blowing it up. - Whoa, whoa, whoa. 1672 01:15:59,221 --> 01:16:00,488 Doc, Doc! 1673 01:16:00,490 --> 01:16:02,323 Our plan... it's rigged to blow in the morning. 1674 01:16:02,325 --> 01:16:03,357 Come on! 1675 01:16:03,359 --> 01:16:04,626 I give you the fans! 1676 01:16:04,628 --> 01:16:06,495 I give you the filmmakers! 1677 01:16:06,497 --> 01:16:09,397 And you give me till dawn to make my movie! 1678 01:16:09,399 --> 01:16:11,600 And explosion is simple. It's easy. 1679 01:16:11,602 --> 01:16:12,801 It was part of the original plan before you 1680 01:16:12,803 --> 01:16:15,738 talk me into this ridiculous exhibition. 1681 01:16:15,740 --> 01:16:17,105 Doc, where's the fun in it? 1682 01:16:17,107 --> 01:16:17,841 Where's the tension? 1683 01:16:17,843 --> 01:16:19,208 Look around! 1684 01:16:19,210 --> 01:16:20,643 We've made nightmares. 1685 01:16:20,645 --> 01:16:22,512 We've made monsters! 1686 01:16:22,514 --> 01:16:25,214 I've seen adults on these screens shit themselves. 1687 01:16:25,216 --> 01:16:26,149 You... 1688 01:16:26,151 --> 01:16:29,553 My son has been here all night! 1689 01:16:29,555 --> 01:16:31,387 Dax is fine! 1690 01:16:31,389 --> 01:16:32,558 I sent him home. 1691 01:16:35,393 --> 01:16:36,627 See? 1692 01:16:36,629 --> 01:16:39,664 He's perfectly safe! 1693 01:16:39,666 --> 01:16:41,298 Should've worn seatbelts. 1694 01:16:41,300 --> 01:16:43,768 A little late for that. 1695 01:16:43,770 --> 01:16:44,671 Safety first. 1696 01:16:47,541 --> 01:16:50,612 [heavy metal music playing] 1697 01:17:00,420 --> 01:17:02,223 [growling] 1698 01:17:39,932 --> 01:17:41,065 Start the truck. 1699 01:17:43,635 --> 01:17:44,834 SAM: Start the truck, Dax! 1700 01:17:44,836 --> 01:17:45,704 I'm trying! 1701 01:17:49,976 --> 01:17:52,743 Seatbelts. 1702 01:17:52,745 --> 01:17:55,480 Forgive me, Father, because I'm about to fuck this nun up! 1703 01:17:59,886 --> 01:18:02,821 Let's do something with a little pizazz... 1704 01:18:02,823 --> 01:18:04,957 something a little extraordinary. 1705 01:18:04,959 --> 01:18:06,658 Let me do the pulse. 1706 01:18:06,660 --> 01:18:08,359 - Walsh... - Come on! 1707 01:18:08,361 --> 01:18:09,460 You know you want to see it! 1708 01:18:09,462 --> 01:18:10,194 Look, look, look. 1709 01:18:10,196 --> 01:18:11,295 We'll do the pulse. 1710 01:18:11,297 --> 01:18:13,633 And then... then we'll blow it all up. 1711 01:18:13,635 --> 01:18:15,702 No survivors. 1712 01:18:15,704 --> 01:18:19,939 Uh, when you say, "no survivors," 1713 01:18:19,941 --> 01:18:21,373 could you be a little bit more specific? 1714 01:18:21,375 --> 01:18:24,545 You just keep editing and... and... and save your work. 1715 01:18:27,650 --> 01:18:29,382 What do you say? 1716 01:18:29,384 --> 01:18:32,418 Have a little fun? 1717 01:18:32,420 --> 01:18:34,790 All right, well, activate the pulse. 1718 01:18:37,694 --> 01:18:39,094 What was the pulse again? 1719 01:18:39,096 --> 01:18:41,528 The pulse is something I developed at the asylum... 1720 01:18:41,530 --> 01:18:46,868 an accident, an attempt at a synoptic lobotomy. 1721 01:18:46,870 --> 01:18:48,770 It's a vibration that goes through the skin, 1722 01:18:48,772 --> 01:18:50,472 through the pulse, to the brain. 1723 01:18:50,474 --> 01:18:51,606 It was supposed to calm my patients. 1724 01:18:51,608 --> 01:18:53,709 It didn't... not at all. 1725 01:18:53,711 --> 01:18:55,745 It drove them mad. 1726 01:18:55,747 --> 01:18:57,545 Well, weren't they already mad? 1727 01:18:57,547 --> 01:18:59,815 It drove them more mad! 1728 01:18:59,817 --> 01:19:03,720 So filled with rage, they tore each other apart before they 1729 01:19:03,722 --> 01:19:05,488 turned on themselves. 1730 01:19:05,490 --> 01:19:07,556 You saved your last cut, right? 1731 01:19:07,558 --> 01:19:09,358 Yeah. 1732 01:19:09,360 --> 01:19:11,293 Uh, I'm sorry. 1733 01:19:11,295 --> 01:19:12,829 Could you go back over that part again? 1734 01:19:12,831 --> 01:19:16,366 How exactly would you activate a vibration through the pulse 1735 01:19:16,368 --> 01:19:18,703 of every surviving... 1736 01:19:18,705 --> 01:19:20,907 Get ready to be very angry. 1737 01:19:24,443 --> 01:19:26,945 Wait, wait, now wait a second here. 1738 01:19:26,947 --> 01:19:28,047 OK? 1739 01:19:28,049 --> 01:19:30,883 Let's not do anything that we might... 1740 01:19:30,885 --> 01:19:31,719 regret! 1741 01:19:48,602 --> 01:19:51,337 Nice. 1742 01:19:51,339 --> 01:19:52,240 Mother fucker. 1743 01:19:56,545 --> 01:19:59,479 I'm glad I don't have a wristband. 1744 01:19:59,481 --> 01:20:00,682 Amy, did you see... 1745 01:20:11,729 --> 01:20:12,728 You're right. 1746 01:20:12,730 --> 01:20:14,331 It's very entertaining. 1747 01:20:19,738 --> 01:20:21,305 We're close to the tower. 1748 01:20:33,018 --> 01:20:35,685 What's... what's wrong with them? 1749 01:20:35,687 --> 01:20:38,655 They're not... they're not monsters. 1750 01:20:38,657 --> 01:20:40,259 It's like they're possessed. 1751 01:20:51,105 --> 01:20:52,104 Sam! 1752 01:20:52,106 --> 01:20:53,172 Sam! 1753 01:20:53,174 --> 01:20:54,106 Sam! 1754 01:20:54,108 --> 01:20:54,942 Come on! 1755 01:21:03,952 --> 01:21:06,552 ALARM SYSTEM: Tower breach. 1756 01:21:06,554 --> 01:21:08,721 Tower breach. 1757 01:21:08,723 --> 01:21:09,790 Tower breach. 1758 01:21:09,792 --> 01:21:11,191 Oh, I love it when they fight back! 1759 01:21:11,193 --> 01:21:12,660 ALARM SYSTEM: Tower breach. 1760 01:21:20,669 --> 01:21:21,670 You're gonna be OK. 1761 01:21:30,580 --> 01:21:31,512 Hey! 1762 01:21:31,514 --> 01:21:32,348 Come on! 1763 01:22:01,982 --> 01:22:02,981 Dad? 1764 01:22:02,983 --> 01:22:04,015 Dad! 1765 01:22:04,017 --> 01:22:05,716 Just let them all kill themselves. 1766 01:22:05,718 --> 01:22:07,618 It's Dax. 1767 01:22:07,620 --> 01:22:09,620 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 1768 01:22:09,622 --> 01:22:11,890 You said I was made for Blood Fest. 1769 01:22:11,892 --> 01:22:13,825 It's not true. 1770 01:22:13,827 --> 01:22:14,929 I was made for you. 1771 01:22:20,767 --> 01:22:21,870 I think I love... 1772 01:22:27,709 --> 01:22:29,111 Thought that would work. 1773 01:22:32,982 --> 01:22:35,550 Sam, wa... wa... wa... wa... wait. 1774 01:22:47,863 --> 01:22:49,030 You did this! 1775 01:22:49,032 --> 01:22:52,867 Do you have one sliver of self-awareness? 1776 01:22:52,869 --> 01:22:54,236 You helped birth all of this! 1777 01:22:54,238 --> 01:22:57,172 Half the monsters are your patients! 1778 01:22:57,174 --> 01:22:59,208 And Doc, if you haven't looked in the mirror lately, 1779 01:22:59,210 --> 01:23:01,710 you're looking a little bloodthirsty yourself. 1780 01:23:01,712 --> 01:23:02,946 You're right. 1781 01:23:02,948 --> 01:23:04,780 I am a little bloodthirsty. 1782 01:23:04,782 --> 01:23:05,781 OK. 1783 01:23:05,783 --> 01:23:06,817 Dad! 1784 01:23:10,554 --> 01:23:11,754 Dax. 1785 01:23:11,756 --> 01:23:12,488 Dad, stop whatever it is you're doing. 1786 01:23:12,490 --> 01:23:13,189 You're killing her! 1787 01:23:13,191 --> 01:23:14,091 Don't worry, son. 1788 01:23:14,093 --> 01:23:16,260 It will all be over very soon. 1789 01:23:16,262 --> 01:23:17,128 We'll get out of here. 1790 01:23:17,130 --> 01:23:18,296 No one will know we're here. 1791 01:23:18,298 --> 01:23:20,932 He's filmed himself doing everything... 1792 01:23:20,934 --> 01:23:21,765 everything. 1793 01:23:21,767 --> 01:23:23,234 He'll take all the credit. 1794 01:23:23,236 --> 01:23:26,671 And then we'll walk out of here, blow the whole place up, 1795 01:23:26,673 --> 01:23:28,974 and we'll be a happy family. 1796 01:23:28,976 --> 01:23:30,309 Let's not blow it up quite yet. 1797 01:23:30,311 --> 01:23:32,843 I still need my ending... something big! 1798 01:23:32,845 --> 01:23:34,246 Something I didn't expect coming! 1799 01:23:34,248 --> 01:23:35,746 How's this? 1800 01:23:35,748 --> 01:23:36,616 See? 1801 01:23:39,254 --> 01:23:42,854 There's no need for re-animated corpses 1802 01:23:42,856 --> 01:23:45,791 or blood-sucking clowns! 1803 01:23:45,793 --> 01:23:46,960 All you need is a gun... 1804 01:23:46,962 --> 01:23:50,230 just one God damn gun! 1805 01:23:50,232 --> 01:23:50,930 Dad! 1806 01:23:50,932 --> 01:23:52,299 Stop right there. 1807 01:23:52,301 --> 01:23:54,101 I'm not going anywhere. 1808 01:23:54,103 --> 01:23:58,805 I'm gonna stay here and save my friend and my sister. 1809 01:23:58,807 --> 01:24:01,276 And if I get out of this place alive, 1810 01:24:01,278 --> 01:24:03,378 I'm telling the whole world what you really are. 1811 01:24:03,380 --> 01:24:06,613 Every time I look in your eyes, all I see is fear. 1812 01:24:06,615 --> 01:24:09,184 Well, there won't be anything to be afraid of anymore, Dax. 1813 01:24:09,186 --> 01:24:11,785 The only thing I was ever afraid of was you! 1814 01:24:11,787 --> 01:24:13,356 Stop right there, Dax. 1815 01:24:13,358 --> 01:24:14,290 Right now. 1816 01:24:14,292 --> 01:24:15,224 No. 1817 01:24:15,226 --> 01:24:17,994 Mom was right. 1818 01:24:17,996 --> 01:24:21,629 I'm stronger than anything I'm afraid of... 1819 01:24:21,631 --> 01:24:22,532 including you. 1820 01:24:27,406 --> 01:24:28,040 Ah! 1821 01:24:31,310 --> 01:24:32,277 I can't let you die... 1822 01:24:35,347 --> 01:24:39,649 unless I die with you. 1823 01:24:39,651 --> 01:24:40,385 Dad... 1824 01:24:40,387 --> 01:24:41,254 Yes. 1825 01:24:44,957 --> 01:24:48,292 I'm going to end this God damn farce. 1826 01:24:48,294 --> 01:24:49,195 [growling] 1827 01:24:50,930 --> 01:24:53,265 It's for the best. 1828 01:24:53,267 --> 01:24:55,234 Honestly. 1829 01:24:55,236 --> 01:24:58,671 Dad... Dad, no. 1830 01:25:24,900 --> 01:25:25,935 Here we go. 1831 01:25:34,877 --> 01:25:35,643 It's OK. 1832 01:25:35,645 --> 01:25:37,380 Let's figure this out! 1833 01:25:37,382 --> 01:25:38,249 Sam! 1834 01:25:41,819 --> 01:25:43,119 Hey, Dax? 1835 01:25:43,121 --> 01:25:44,721 Try the wristband. 1836 01:25:58,002 --> 01:26:00,903 You're covered in black vomit. 1837 01:26:00,905 --> 01:26:02,307 I don't mind. 1838 01:26:02,309 --> 01:26:03,176 It's yours. 1839 01:26:16,224 --> 01:26:18,259 A "thank you" would be appreciated. 1840 01:26:24,298 --> 01:26:28,368 You know, Sis, you, uh, you killed a number of people 1841 01:26:28,370 --> 01:26:29,336 tonight. 1842 01:26:29,338 --> 01:26:30,403 Yeah. 1843 01:26:30,405 --> 01:26:31,304 Phew! 1844 01:26:31,306 --> 01:26:34,341 I mean, murder. 1845 01:26:34,343 --> 01:26:36,443 Horrible. 1846 01:26:36,445 --> 01:26:38,446 Lesson learned. 1847 01:26:38,448 --> 01:26:40,814 I think maybe they're going to send you somewhere. 1848 01:26:40,816 --> 01:26:41,982 Uh-huh. 1849 01:26:41,984 --> 01:26:44,220 Maybe get some good psychiatric help. 1850 01:26:49,193 --> 01:26:50,791 Jesus Christ, Sis! 1851 01:26:50,793 --> 01:26:52,128 Happy Halloween, big brother! 1852 01:26:56,467 --> 01:26:58,400 [truck starts] 1853 01:26:58,402 --> 01:27:07,377 [truck drives away] 1854 01:27:07,379 --> 01:27:11,046 So is this the third way a horror movie ends? 1855 01:27:11,048 --> 01:27:11,980 Classic. 1856 01:27:11,982 --> 01:27:15,354 [music playing] 1857 01:27:51,227 --> 01:27:54,228 You think anyone survived? 1858 01:27:54,230 --> 01:27:56,298 Maybe there's a chance. 1859 01:28:07,142 --> 01:28:09,277 Never mind. 1860 01:28:09,279 --> 01:28:11,078 No. 1861 01:28:11,080 --> 01:28:12,482 Fucking Blood Fest. 1862 01:28:16,019 --> 01:28:20,023 [music playing] 1863 01:28:20,025 --> 01:28:25,025 Subtitles by explosiveskull 1863 01:28:26,305 --> 01:28:32,534 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 121026

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