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BOW: Growing up, my grandfather
was a perpetual bachelor.
2
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,123
He ran through ladies so fast,
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00:00:08,225 --> 00:00:10,642
we only knew them
as "Sacramento Stewardess"
4
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and "Pennysaver Print Model."
5
00:00:12,463 --> 00:00:14,296
So my dad never got attached
to the women
6
00:00:14,398 --> 00:00:15,514
my granddad was dating.
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I feel like this is
the only place we ever go.
8
00:00:18,519 --> 00:00:21,103
Yeah, maybe next time let's mix it up
9
00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:23,305
and maybe go some place
where they don't repurpose
10
00:00:23,407 --> 00:00:25,941
old garlic sticks for croutons.
11
00:00:27,311 --> 00:00:29,695
Hold up. Is that your dad?
12
00:00:29,797 --> 00:00:31,146
Does he have a girlfriend?
13
00:00:31,232 --> 00:00:32,197
No.
14
00:00:32,323 --> 00:00:34,924
[Laughter]
15
00:00:35,002 --> 00:00:35,984
Ah.
16
00:00:36,087 --> 00:00:38,620
I don't know, hon.
Looks pretty serious.
17
00:00:38,645 --> 00:00:40,695
SANTAMONICA:
He could do so much better.
18
00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:43,338
Who does she think she's fooling
with those press-on nails?
19
00:00:43,363 --> 00:00:44,901
[Sighs]
20
00:00:44,998 --> 00:00:46,081
♪ In the mix ♪
21
00:00:46,106 --> 00:00:48,369
♪ Oh, oh, oh, they keep trying ♪
22
00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:50,832
♪ But they can't stop us ♪
23
00:00:50,935 --> 00:00:53,185
♪ 'Cause we got a love ♪
24
00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:55,521
♪ That keeps rising up ♪
25
00:00:55,639 --> 00:00:56,755
♪ In the mix ♪
26
00:00:56,857 --> 00:00:58,474
♪ Life turns around ♪
27
00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:00,025
♪ 'Round and 'round it goes ♪
28
00:01:00,144 --> 00:01:02,644
♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up world ♪
♪ Ooh, it's a mixed-up ♪
29
00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:04,396
♪ And that's for sure ♪
♪ Mixed-up ♪
30
00:01:04,515 --> 00:01:06,148
♪ In the mix ♪
♪ Baby ♪
31
00:01:06,233 --> 00:01:07,576
♪ We're gonna get by ♪
32
00:01:07,693 --> 00:01:10,102
♪ We're gonna ♪
♪ On our own, side by side ♪
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♪ Love's all we need to be free ♪
♪ Lo-o-o-ve is all ♪
34
00:01:12,990 --> 00:01:15,023
♪ I got you, you got me ♪
35
00:01:15,126 --> 00:01:17,459
♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪
36
00:01:17,545 --> 00:01:19,361
♪ I-I-In the mix ♪
37
00:01:19,463 --> 00:01:22,030
♪ Yaaaaay us! ♪
38
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♪ I-I-In the mix-ish ♪
39
00:01:24,868 --> 00:01:28,387
ALICIA: I've never seen him
on a date before.
40
00:01:28,506 --> 00:01:32,057
This is like seeing Bigfoot
order a medium pepperoni.
41
00:01:32,176 --> 00:01:33,375
What's everyone looking at?
42
00:01:33,477 --> 00:01:34,975
I left my glasses in the car.
43
00:01:35,079 --> 00:01:37,629
I bet it's serious because
I met all my boyfriends here.
44
00:01:37,748 --> 00:01:39,999
This is the most romantic place ever.
45
00:01:40,117 --> 00:01:42,134
MAN: Whoever's puking
in the whack-a-mole machine,
46
00:01:42,253 --> 00:01:44,219
- please stop.
- [Paul chuckles] Romantic.
47
00:01:44,305 --> 00:01:46,305
Well, that's
an interesting way to describe
48
00:01:46,424 --> 00:01:49,258
a millionaire and a blonde
at a dollar-a-slice pizza joint.
49
00:01:49,343 --> 00:01:50,392
Well, what are we supposed to do?
50
00:01:50,478 --> 00:01:52,311
Should we go over and try to say hello?
51
00:01:52,430 --> 00:01:54,513
Maybe send over some mozzarella sticks.
52
00:01:54,631 --> 00:01:56,298
No, we should go someplace else.
53
00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:58,517
What?! No. I love it here.
54
00:01:58,635 --> 00:02:00,936
No, you don't.
You just dissed the salad bar.
55
00:02:01,022 --> 00:02:03,689
I'm too young to be held
accountable for anything I say.
56
00:02:03,807 --> 00:02:07,576
Well, if we're staying, I'm
sending over mozzarella sticks.
57
00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:09,078
- Help him seal the deal.
- No.
58
00:02:09,163 --> 00:02:10,946
- What about a carafe of Diet Coke?
- Stop it.
59
00:02:11,032 --> 00:02:13,165
- A pitcher of mediocre light beer?
- Alicia.
60
00:02:13,284 --> 00:02:15,000
[Harrison clears throat]
61
00:02:15,119 --> 00:02:16,869
We were gonna pretend
not to notice you,
62
00:02:16,987 --> 00:02:19,154
but you made that impossible.
63
00:02:19,264 --> 00:02:21,223
Everyone, this is Georgia.
64
00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:22,808
Georgia.
65
00:02:22,901 --> 00:02:24,384
Of course.
66
00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:26,314
- Nice to meet you all.
- SANTAMONICA: What's your story, woman?
67
00:02:26,439 --> 00:02:29,565
Because you should know,
I don't have a moral compass.
68
00:02:29,683 --> 00:02:32,601
And you wonder why people
think you have a White mom.
69
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,520
Sorry, she's not usually like this.
70
00:02:34,605 --> 00:02:35,771
Why don't you join us?
71
00:02:35,889 --> 00:02:37,072
We can pull up another chair
72
00:02:37,191 --> 00:02:39,724
and get to know each other
over mozzarella sticks.
73
00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:41,110
- Honey, let it go.
- Yep.
74
00:02:41,228 --> 00:02:43,996
Well, we said hello.
Now it's time for us to go.
75
00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:45,080
Nice to meet you.
76
00:02:45,199 --> 00:02:46,949
She didn't mean that.
77
00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:51,003
She smells nice. Was she pretty?
78
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:53,505
ALICIA: Oh, baby.
79
00:02:56,427 --> 00:02:58,210
Wouldn't it be nice
if there was a place
80
00:02:58,295 --> 00:03:01,463
you could go to drink coffee
and sit and relax,
81
00:03:01,582 --> 00:03:03,582
listening to smooth jazz?
82
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:05,750
Sounds like people would just
go there to use the bathroom.
83
00:03:05,853 --> 00:03:07,553
[Door opens, closes]
84
00:03:09,640 --> 00:03:11,089
Bow-Bow, is everything all right?
85
00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:13,108
Yeah, Mom, everything's fine.
86
00:03:13,227 --> 00:03:14,926
Aunt Dee-Dee, can I talk to you?
87
00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:16,278
I got a problem.
88
00:03:16,397 --> 00:03:17,696
Is it about your piggy bank?
89
00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:19,481
Because I'm sure the person
who smashed it
90
00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:22,367
and took all your money will pay
you back once her horse wins.
91
00:03:22,453 --> 00:03:23,952
- No, but thanks.
- Hmm.
92
00:03:24,071 --> 00:03:26,155
Anyways, I wore
my airbrushed jeans to school,
93
00:03:26,273 --> 00:03:27,772
and Tamika said they were busted.
94
00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:28,940
Are they busted?
95
00:03:29,043 --> 00:03:30,275
No!
96
00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:31,743
Oh.
97
00:03:31,829 --> 00:03:33,278
They're hot, right?
98
00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:34,796
Oh, girl!
99
00:03:34,915 --> 00:03:36,882
No, it is not hot.
100
00:03:36,967 --> 00:03:39,501
But you can't tell Tamika that.
101
00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,770
Act like it's the greatest thing
you've ever worn,
102
00:03:41,872 --> 00:03:44,289
then tell her someone stole them
during gym class.
103
00:03:44,391 --> 00:03:46,508
That's a great idea.
104
00:03:46,642 --> 00:03:48,525
You always give the best advice.
105
00:03:48,629 --> 00:03:52,064
♪♪
106
00:03:52,149 --> 00:03:55,601
- You always give the best advice?
- Mm-hmm.
107
00:03:55,686 --> 00:03:58,070
How often are they coming to you
with this kind of thing?
108
00:03:58,155 --> 00:04:00,606
Not that much.
Just three or four times a day.
109
00:04:00,691 --> 00:04:03,408
I'm good at helping them
with their little problems.
110
00:04:03,494 --> 00:04:05,277
Mm. What kind of problems?
111
00:04:05,362 --> 00:04:08,313
Everything from homework
to how close to midnight
112
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:09,748
can you feed a gremlin.
113
00:04:09,856 --> 00:04:11,723
The answer is... do not feed them.
114
00:04:11,818 --> 00:04:14,119
Leave dirty furry pets
for the White people.
115
00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:18,340
So they basically come to you
for everything.
116
00:04:18,442 --> 00:04:20,209
Oh, no. Not for money.
117
00:04:22,012 --> 00:04:23,258
Not Aunt Dee-Dee.
118
00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:24,913
I don't love them that much.
119
00:04:25,015 --> 00:04:27,049
♪♪
120
00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:28,433
HARRISON: Hey.
121
00:04:28,519 --> 00:04:32,054
Ah, how did the rest
of the night go with Georgia?
122
00:04:32,172 --> 00:04:33,472
She seems charming.
123
00:04:33,572 --> 00:04:37,324
Yeah. During dinner, she asked
for the manager four times.
124
00:04:37,394 --> 00:04:38,927
She made our waiter quit.
125
00:04:39,029 --> 00:04:40,612
But... ah.
126
00:04:40,698 --> 00:04:41,947
But that's what I like about her.
127
00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:44,283
She knows what she wants.
It's attractive.
128
00:04:44,368 --> 00:04:45,850
Really?
129
00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,185
Well, she's different.
130
00:04:47,288 --> 00:04:49,705
I mean, when I'm with her,
I stop thinking about it
131
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:52,190
as hours I'm not billing clients.
132
00:04:52,293 --> 00:04:54,126
It's like I lose all track of time.
133
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:55,911
I don't even think of her
as a woman I'm dating.
134
00:04:56,029 --> 00:04:58,297
I think of her as an expensive asset
135
00:04:58,382 --> 00:05:01,533
that needs cultivation
and attention and just...
136
00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:02,968
[Laughs]
137
00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:04,086
Look at me.
138
00:05:04,204 --> 00:05:05,254
I'm gushing.
139
00:05:05,372 --> 00:05:06,471
Wow.
140
00:05:06,557 --> 00:05:08,724
I haven't seen you
this genuinely interested
141
00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:10,225
in someone since Mom left.
142
00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:11,526
- Yeah.
- Well, wait.
143
00:05:11,645 --> 00:05:13,262
If you like her so much,
why'd you take her to a place
144
00:05:13,364 --> 00:05:15,297
that gives out free food
for good report cards?
145
00:05:15,399 --> 00:05:18,150
It's a thing I do, to make sure
that when I'm dating someone,
146
00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:21,570
they're with me for me
and not for my money.
147
00:05:21,689 --> 00:05:24,856
Look, it's very easy to fall
in love with all of this.
148
00:05:24,942 --> 00:05:26,723
So I gotta dirty myself up a little
149
00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:28,777
so I don't look too good to be true.
150
00:05:28,953 --> 00:05:31,253
Dad, if you really like her,
151
00:05:31,365 --> 00:05:33,498
you probably shouldn't
play games with her like this.
152
00:05:33,584 --> 00:05:35,083
I mean, how many good relationships
153
00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:36,451
start off with a lie?
154
00:05:36,570 --> 00:05:37,452
Eh.
155
00:05:37,571 --> 00:05:39,254
Well, you may be right, son.
156
00:05:39,373 --> 00:05:41,590
A woman like that deserves the truth.
157
00:05:41,709 --> 00:05:44,242
Besides, it's all gonna come out
at some point anyway, right?
158
00:05:44,345 --> 00:05:46,911
I mean, do I look like a guy
who doesn't own
159
00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:50,299
a cigar collection
worth more than this house?
160
00:05:50,417 --> 00:05:52,384
Come on.
161
00:05:52,469 --> 00:05:53,885
Who am I gonna fool?
162
00:05:53,971 --> 00:05:55,937
[Laughs] Once upon a time,
163
00:05:56,056 --> 00:05:58,173
there was a beautiful Queen Denise
164
00:05:58,292 --> 00:06:00,676
who was as humble as she was stunning.
165
00:06:00,778 --> 00:06:02,444
You do the best stories, Aunt Denise.
166
00:06:02,546 --> 00:06:03,512
Oh!
167
00:06:03,637 --> 00:06:06,255
You know who also has good stories?
168
00:06:06,350 --> 00:06:08,116
- Oh, oh, oh.
- Excuse me.
169
00:06:08,235 --> 00:06:09,434
Oh, my.
170
00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:11,987
Mommy does.
171
00:06:12,096 --> 00:06:18,117
I am gonna tell you a story
of Princess... Pillow
172
00:06:18,195 --> 00:06:21,963
and her trusty Knight...
173
00:06:22,318 --> 00:06:23,868
Glass of Water.
174
00:06:23,970 --> 00:06:24,818
Mm-hmm.
175
00:06:25,035 --> 00:06:27,035
Princess Pillow was a soft
176
00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:31,373
and fluffy pillow princess
who was colorful and...
177
00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:33,558
Mom, Mom, it worked. I'm asleep.
178
00:06:33,677 --> 00:06:34,559
[Fake snoring]
179
00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:36,444
I'm not... I'm not done yet.
180
00:06:39,114 --> 00:06:40,331
Really?
181
00:06:40,450 --> 00:06:42,100
- [Snoring]
- Really?
182
00:06:42,219 --> 00:06:44,736
I am so sorry.
183
00:06:44,855 --> 00:06:46,154
Put me to sleep too.
184
00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,872
Just wait.
185
00:06:47,991 --> 00:06:49,541
So Princess Pillow...
186
00:06:49,566 --> 00:06:50,479
Oh!
187
00:06:50,557 --> 00:06:52,177
While my mom wasn't being honest
188
00:06:52,295 --> 00:06:54,466
about how she felt left out,
189
00:06:54,491 --> 00:06:57,142
my grandfather decided to stop lying.
190
00:06:57,167 --> 00:06:59,384
He had Georgia on his mind.
191
00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:01,670
So...
192
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:04,013
why are we meeting in a law firm, huh?
193
00:07:04,115 --> 00:07:05,448
This better not be a green card thing
194
00:07:05,533 --> 00:07:09,001
because I am not gonna marry
another Irish immigrant.
195
00:07:09,120 --> 00:07:10,836
I just wanted to tell you the truth.
196
00:07:10,955 --> 00:07:13,422
Brace yourself.
197
00:07:13,524 --> 00:07:14,640
I'm not poor.
198
00:07:14,759 --> 00:07:15,992
In fact, I'm probably
199
00:07:16,077 --> 00:07:18,110
the richest person you've ever met.
200
00:07:18,213 --> 00:07:19,128
Oh.
201
00:07:19,214 --> 00:07:20,496
And I was afraid to tell you this
202
00:07:20,582 --> 00:07:21,831
because I wanted to know for certain
203
00:07:21,916 --> 00:07:24,986
that you liked me for me
and not my money,
204
00:07:25,011 --> 00:07:28,446
which I have a lot of. [Laughs]
205
00:07:28,564 --> 00:07:31,910
So, you want to grab lunch
at a decent restaurant,
206
00:07:31,935 --> 00:07:35,503
or do you need a moment
to compose yourself?
207
00:07:35,589 --> 00:07:37,806
Wow, Harrison, I don't really
know what to say
208
00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:39,457
except, uh...
209
00:07:39,734 --> 00:07:41,611
[Chuckles] I'm just so relieved.
210
00:07:41,713 --> 00:07:43,630
I know. It's like winning
the lotto, right?
211
00:07:43,749 --> 00:07:45,915
Well, in a way, yes.
212
00:07:46,017 --> 00:07:47,417
Now I don't have to worry about you
213
00:07:47,519 --> 00:07:49,352
disliking me for my money.
214
00:07:49,438 --> 00:07:51,121
- Your money?
- Mm-hmm.
215
00:07:51,206 --> 00:07:53,523
I own three of the high rises downtown.
216
00:07:53,625 --> 00:07:55,191
You would be so surprised
217
00:07:55,293 --> 00:07:58,161
how many men are intimidated by that.
218
00:07:58,263 --> 00:07:59,412
Ah!
219
00:07:59,514 --> 00:08:05,034
Ah, s... a man being intimidated
by a woman?
220
00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:06,235
In any way?
221
00:08:06,338 --> 00:08:07,871
[Chuckles] Wimps.
222
00:08:07,956 --> 00:08:09,071
[Laughs]
223
00:08:09,174 --> 00:08:11,591
My grandfather was one of those men.
224
00:08:11,632 --> 00:08:13,965
[Laughs]
225
00:08:14,386 --> 00:08:15,385
Yeah.
226
00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:21,257
Welp...
227
00:08:21,367 --> 00:08:24,351
Georgia is richer than me.
228
00:08:24,429 --> 00:08:26,228
That's what I get for trying
to date a woman
229
00:08:26,330 --> 00:08:28,080
who's old enough to rent a car.
230
00:08:28,182 --> 00:08:30,933
Georgia's got more money than you?
231
00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:32,134
Okay.
232
00:08:32,253 --> 00:08:33,636
I think it's great
that you're dating someone
233
00:08:33,761 --> 00:08:34,977
on your own level.
234
00:08:35,089 --> 00:08:36,588
Doesn't sound so great to me.
235
00:08:36,691 --> 00:08:39,158
Whoever makes the most money
is the shot caller.
236
00:08:39,243 --> 00:08:42,044
Exactly. Which movie
are we gonna go see?
237
00:08:42,146 --> 00:08:43,512
Where are we gonna eat?
238
00:08:43,631 --> 00:08:45,848
What big game are we gonna hunt?
239
00:08:45,982 --> 00:08:48,232
I don't want her telling me
that we're on a giraffe hunt.
240
00:08:48,335 --> 00:08:50,302
I'm a rhino guy.
241
00:08:50,405 --> 00:08:51,721
It's only money, Dad.
242
00:08:51,823 --> 00:08:53,989
You know who says that?
People who don't have money.
243
00:08:54,108 --> 00:08:55,908
That's like the little guy
from "Fantasy Island"
244
00:08:55,993 --> 00:08:58,077
saying it's only height.
245
00:08:58,179 --> 00:08:59,712
You know what this is?
246
00:09:00,123 --> 00:09:01,156
You're scared.
247
00:09:01,258 --> 00:09:02,507
[Scoffs] I am not.
248
00:09:02,592 --> 00:09:04,426
Why else would you run away
from a beautiful
249
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,644
and talented woman who's into you?
250
00:09:06,730 --> 00:09:09,781
No, you're a scared little goat.
251
00:09:09,866 --> 00:09:12,617
[Bleating]
252
00:09:12,827 --> 00:09:16,112
Yeah, my dad, the scared little goat.
253
00:09:16,238 --> 00:09:18,038
[Bleating]
254
00:09:18,132 --> 00:09:20,416
This is the whitest
trash-talking I've ever seen.
255
00:09:20,535 --> 00:09:22,969
It's a commune thing.
Goats frighten easily.
256
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:24,629
They usually just pass out,
257
00:09:24,747 --> 00:09:26,597
so I don't know
what the noise is about.
258
00:09:26,716 --> 00:09:29,100
- [Bleating continues]
- All right, enough, enough.
259
00:09:29,218 --> 00:09:30,518
You're right.
260
00:09:30,610 --> 00:09:32,660
[Sighs]
261
00:09:32,762 --> 00:09:36,196
Maybe I should just see
what happens if I stick with it.
262
00:09:36,476 --> 00:09:38,309
- Good for you.
- This will be our third date,
263
00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:40,995
the first one not at a fast food chain.
264
00:09:41,114 --> 00:09:43,248
I don't know. This is getting
dangerously close
265
00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:44,482
to a relationship.
266
00:09:44,568 --> 00:09:46,568
Yeah, but see, that's nothing
to be afraid of.
267
00:09:46,686 --> 00:09:48,686
Look, Dad, I've been watching
you date my entire life,
268
00:09:48,772 --> 00:09:49,804
and the way that you go about it
269
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,906
is not good for something more serious.
270
00:09:52,046 --> 00:09:54,647
I was voted Most Respectful
in high school.
271
00:09:54,727 --> 00:09:55,743
Let me teach you.
272
00:09:55,862 --> 00:09:57,579
Just what he needs, dating advice
273
00:09:57,697 --> 00:10:00,782
from a man
who just imitated a damn goat.
274
00:10:00,884 --> 00:10:03,268
- Hmm?
- Damn right.
275
00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:07,772
♪♪
276
00:10:08,007 --> 00:10:10,007
Hey, Mom, have you seen Aunt Denise?
277
00:10:10,125 --> 00:10:12,309
I told all the kids at school
I was a neon black belt,
278
00:10:12,411 --> 00:10:13,694
and I was hoping she could teach me
279
00:10:13,779 --> 00:10:16,413
how to fake my way through it.
280
00:10:16,532 --> 00:10:18,565
You don't need Denise for that.
281
00:10:18,667 --> 00:10:19,716
Let me teach you.
282
00:10:19,835 --> 00:10:21,668
I make grown men cry in the courtroom.
283
00:10:21,770 --> 00:10:23,270
How hard could this be?
284
00:10:23,355 --> 00:10:24,354
Come on.
285
00:10:24,473 --> 00:10:25,856
Let momma show you.
286
00:10:25,974 --> 00:10:27,858
♪♪
287
00:10:27,976 --> 00:10:29,993
Okay, let's begin.
288
00:10:30,112 --> 00:10:32,796
Martial arts is about finding balance.
289
00:10:32,915 --> 00:10:34,214
Like this.
290
00:10:34,299 --> 00:10:37,134
♪♪
291
00:10:37,252 --> 00:10:38,997
Like this?
292
00:10:39,388 --> 00:10:40,654
Exactly.
293
00:10:40,874 --> 00:10:43,625
All you have to do is find your center.
294
00:10:43,710 --> 00:10:46,494
Slow down, and that will impress them.
295
00:10:46,597 --> 00:10:48,873
Okay. I think I'm getting this.
296
00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,147
I feel like this is gonna work.
297
00:10:50,233 --> 00:10:52,483
While slowing things down
allowed my mother
298
00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:54,969
to feel connected to her child,
299
00:10:55,088 --> 00:10:57,455
my father sat down to teach
my grandfather
300
00:10:57,540 --> 00:10:58,839
about relationships.
301
00:10:58,958 --> 00:11:01,375
I'm glad you're coming to me
to take this step
302
00:11:01,477 --> 00:11:03,794
because after 17 years of marriage,
303
00:11:03,897 --> 00:11:05,313
I've learned what it takes to make
304
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:07,565
a long-term relationship work.
305
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:08,866
And what do you think that is?
306
00:11:08,952 --> 00:11:10,835
- Sex.
- No, it is not.
307
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,404
Not that it's not that,
but that's not what I'm talking about.
308
00:11:13,489 --> 00:11:15,590
You're not talking
about "trust," are you?
309
00:11:15,692 --> 00:11:16,857
Why do you say it like that?
310
00:11:16,976 --> 00:11:18,008
It is "trust."
311
00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:21,178
No, what I'm talking about
is vulnerability.
312
00:11:21,281 --> 00:11:22,330
Honesty.
313
00:11:22,448 --> 00:11:23,531
Allowing the other person
314
00:11:23,657 --> 00:11:25,791
to see the real you and all your flaws.
315
00:11:26,953 --> 00:11:30,504
All right, Dad, let's...
let's try something here.
316
00:11:30,623 --> 00:11:31,889
- Pretend I'm Georgia.
- [Scoffs]
317
00:11:31,975 --> 00:11:33,441
We're on a date.
318
00:11:33,559 --> 00:11:35,392
We're having dinner.
319
00:11:35,503 --> 00:11:37,286
How would you open up to me?
320
00:11:37,396 --> 00:11:40,842
I'd talk about how we should
hurry up and eat dinner
321
00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:43,918
because dessert is what I paid for.
322
00:11:44,027 --> 00:11:45,777
No, Dad, that is not what you would do
323
00:11:45,855 --> 00:11:47,255
because you like this woman.
324
00:11:47,357 --> 00:11:48,856
Come on.
325
00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:50,274
Let's get deep.
326
00:11:50,360 --> 00:11:52,193
I really need you to dig in there.
327
00:11:52,311 --> 00:11:53,361
[Sighs]
328
00:11:53,463 --> 00:11:55,930
Okay. Here's something I would say.
329
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:59,600
Every time I watch the movie
"Back to the Future," I cry
330
00:11:59,702 --> 00:12:02,603
because it's really about a
father and a son getting closer.
331
00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:03,738
You go.
332
00:12:05,742 --> 00:12:09,427
My son was in a cult for 15 years,
333
00:12:09,512 --> 00:12:13,147
and I was so embarrassed that
I told everybody he was dead.
334
00:12:15,301 --> 00:12:17,637
But I missed him either way.
335
00:12:18,037 --> 00:12:19,597
Okay.
336
00:12:20,523 --> 00:12:23,991
Yeah, see, th-th-that honesty
is what creates bonds.
337
00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:25,910
Yeah, you just go into your date
unafraid
338
00:12:26,029 --> 00:12:27,411
to talk about how you really feel.
339
00:12:27,530 --> 00:12:28,529
Okay, yeah.
340
00:12:28,631 --> 00:12:30,481
This may work.
341
00:12:30,692 --> 00:12:32,225
What did you tell people I died of?
342
00:12:32,310 --> 00:12:33,309
Syphilis.
343
00:12:33,428 --> 00:12:35,228
God.
344
00:12:35,313 --> 00:12:36,779
Hi-ya!
345
00:12:36,898 --> 00:12:38,197
Hi-ya!
346
00:12:38,283 --> 00:12:40,149
Well done, Johan-san.
347
00:12:40,251 --> 00:12:42,403
But make those chucks fast and messy.
348
00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:44,111
Nobody's impressed
by a graceful chucker.
349
00:12:44,230 --> 00:12:47,064
- Come on, go, go.
- Wait, Johan, what are you doing?
350
00:12:47,149 --> 00:12:49,450
Didn't you learn everything
you needed to from me?
351
00:12:49,528 --> 00:12:50,451
Not at all.
352
00:12:50,553 --> 00:12:52,987
And besides, purse chucking is cool.
353
00:12:53,256 --> 00:12:56,056
It's a purse-based martial arts
I'm developing.
354
00:12:56,159 --> 00:12:57,858
But at my school, you get belts
you want to wear.
355
00:12:57,977 --> 00:12:59,910
I'm a Ferragamo.
356
00:12:59,996 --> 00:13:03,197
Well, I guess the kids
don't need me then.
357
00:13:03,315 --> 00:13:05,382
I'll just be the person
who brings them dinner
358
00:13:05,468 --> 00:13:08,980
and... you can fold your own laundry.
359
00:13:12,141 --> 00:13:14,241
Come on, let's get back into it.
360
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:15,728
Come on, you're not a little kid.
361
00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:17,086
You're a man!
362
00:13:17,188 --> 00:13:20,939
So while Johan was "learning"
from my aunt,
363
00:13:21,042 --> 00:13:24,293
Grandad Harrison tried to take
my dad's lessons to heart.
364
00:13:25,746 --> 00:13:27,263
Well, they didn't have whack-a-mole,
365
00:13:27,381 --> 00:13:29,348
but I thought the steak
was pretty good.
366
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:31,317
Yeah, and my family
can't afford this place,
367
00:13:31,402 --> 00:13:34,320
so our chances of getting
interrupted are slim.
368
00:13:35,256 --> 00:13:36,705
Will you guys be needing anything else?
369
00:13:36,824 --> 00:13:38,490
Nope. Just the check.
370
00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:39,682
Mm.
371
00:13:39,794 --> 00:13:41,429
Here, I'll take care of it.
372
00:13:42,329 --> 00:13:44,296
Hey, if I had a lady pay for me,
373
00:13:44,382 --> 00:13:45,815
I'd be stoked.
374
00:13:47,318 --> 00:13:48,267
[Thudding]
375
00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:51,237
[Echoing] Lady pay for me...
376
00:13:51,322 --> 00:13:53,656
Lady pay for me...
377
00:13:53,774 --> 00:13:55,241
Lady pay for me...
378
00:13:55,326 --> 00:13:58,237
[Laughter]
379
00:13:58,895 --> 00:14:03,097
♪♪
380
00:14:03,167 --> 00:14:04,449
You've got this.
381
00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:06,428
Her paying the check
doesn't mean anything.
382
00:14:06,429 --> 00:14:08,471
Just be vulnerable.
383
00:14:08,589 --> 00:14:09,621
[Ding!]
384
00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:10,875
Harrison?
385
00:14:11,209 --> 00:14:12,174
Harrison.
386
00:14:12,293 --> 00:14:13,642
[Laughs]
387
00:14:13,761 --> 00:14:16,798
- Is everything all right?
- Uh, uh... yeah.
388
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:18,514
Yeah, everything's great.
389
00:14:18,632 --> 00:14:20,176
Mm.
390
00:14:20,768 --> 00:14:23,819
You know, actually, uh, to be honest,
391
00:14:23,945 --> 00:14:26,696
I did have a little bit
of a freakout right then
392
00:14:26,807 --> 00:14:28,434
when you paid the check.
393
00:14:28,860 --> 00:14:30,019
Really?
394
00:14:30,444 --> 00:14:34,732
But I'm not afraid to be able
to tell you the truth.
395
00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:37,249
'Cause I think you're special
396
00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:39,904
and I want to be vulnerable with you.
397
00:14:40,605 --> 00:14:42,888
Yeah. Yeah, I know.
398
00:14:42,990 --> 00:14:46,709
You have been vulnerable with me
all night.
399
00:14:46,828 --> 00:14:50,963
About your feelings,
your dreams, and your regrets.
400
00:14:51,048 --> 00:14:54,002
And, um, it's a big turnoff.
401
00:14:55,019 --> 00:14:56,879
I just want to have fun.
402
00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:59,590
Oh, this is why I usually date
younger men.
403
00:15:00,858 --> 00:15:02,274
What are you saying?
404
00:15:05,162 --> 00:15:06,278
Thanks a lot.
405
00:15:08,507 --> 00:15:10,090
She dumped me.
406
00:15:14,037 --> 00:15:16,085
- She dumped you?
- Yes, and I came here
407
00:15:16,217 --> 00:15:18,320
to tell you how terrible
your advice was
408
00:15:18,432 --> 00:15:20,566
in the hopes that it would
make me feel better,
409
00:15:20,651 --> 00:15:22,201
but it's not helping.
410
00:15:24,019 --> 00:15:25,318
That's not doing it either.
411
00:15:25,396 --> 00:15:29,848
When I told Georgia
about my feelings, she bailed.
412
00:15:30,177 --> 00:15:31,844
I had it right
when I was just running around,
413
00:15:31,929 --> 00:15:33,462
telling chicks
that I can't call them back
414
00:15:33,564 --> 00:15:36,498
because I'm about to spend
a month on America's Moonbase.
415
00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:38,183
America doesn't have a Moonbase.
416
00:15:38,269 --> 00:15:39,568
They don't know that.
417
00:15:39,687 --> 00:15:41,570
Oh, D-Dad, come on.
418
00:15:41,689 --> 00:15:43,055
I've seen you do more for Georgia
419
00:15:43,172 --> 00:15:45,089
than I've seen you do
for any other woman.
420
00:15:45,192 --> 00:15:46,358
I mean, you... you participated
421
00:15:46,444 --> 00:15:48,027
in that role-playing exercise we did.
422
00:15:48,112 --> 00:15:49,745
If you ever mention that to anyone,
423
00:15:49,847 --> 00:15:50,862
I swear to God, I'm gon...
424
00:15:50,965 --> 00:15:51,997
I know, I know.
425
00:15:52,099 --> 00:15:53,432
But the fact
that you were willing to do that
426
00:15:53,517 --> 00:15:58,020
shows that you're ready to try
having a real relationship.
427
00:15:58,139 --> 00:15:59,405
You've grown.
428
00:15:59,490 --> 00:16:01,607
Eh, maybe I have.
429
00:16:01,692 --> 00:16:03,075
A little.
430
00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:05,110
But when you open up like that,
431
00:16:05,212 --> 00:16:07,679
you are just asking to get
kicked in the crotch, you know?
432
00:16:07,765 --> 00:16:09,331
O-O-Of course.
433
00:16:09,450 --> 00:16:10,466
But if you never open up,
434
00:16:10,584 --> 00:16:12,051
no one will ever know that you're more
435
00:16:12,136 --> 00:16:14,303
than just a man with money.
436
00:16:14,430 --> 00:16:18,899
And you are more than just a man
with money.
437
00:16:18,976 --> 00:16:20,359
Maybe you're right.
438
00:16:20,444 --> 00:16:22,861
Dad, I'm sorry it didn't work out.
439
00:16:22,947 --> 00:16:25,531
But I feel that the next time
you meet somebody special,
440
00:16:25,616 --> 00:16:27,666
you'll be ready.
441
00:16:27,752 --> 00:16:30,452
I'm gonna go graffiti
one of Georgia's buildings.
442
00:16:30,571 --> 00:16:31,537
Need help?
443
00:16:32,767 --> 00:16:34,593
Yeah, grab some paint.
444
00:16:34,696 --> 00:16:37,280
♪♪
445
00:16:37,399 --> 00:16:39,098
[Sighs]
446
00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:40,199
What are you doing?
447
00:16:40,285 --> 00:16:41,701
Oh, you know, just putting together
448
00:16:41,786 --> 00:16:45,455
a six-course meal for my kids
because I love them so much.
449
00:16:45,573 --> 00:16:47,056
It's a Tuesday.
450
00:16:47,175 --> 00:16:48,841
Oh, I guess an aunt would only whip up
451
00:16:48,927 --> 00:16:50,493
something special on a holiday.
452
00:16:50,595 --> 00:16:52,378
But a mother loves her kids enough
453
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:56,766
to make a meal that won't be
ready for another four hours.
454
00:16:56,884 --> 00:16:58,935
Okay. Before I confront you on this,
455
00:16:59,037 --> 00:17:01,454
put down the knife.
456
00:17:01,545 --> 00:17:04,282
- [Sighs]
- Have you lost your mind?
457
00:17:04,376 --> 00:17:06,175
I just feel so useless.
458
00:17:06,277 --> 00:17:08,344
The kids used to come to me
for everything.
459
00:17:08,463 --> 00:17:10,755
I answered all their questions,
gave them all advice.
460
00:17:10,780 --> 00:17:12,363
And every time they were
about to get hurt,
461
00:17:12,482 --> 00:17:14,482
they would say, "Hey, Mom, watch this."
462
00:17:14,568 --> 00:17:16,568
And if I wasn't around, they
would wait until I was looking
463
00:17:16,686 --> 00:17:17,735
and then hurt themselves.
464
00:17:17,854 --> 00:17:20,088
But now I don't know who they're
hurting themselves in front of.
465
00:17:20,156 --> 00:17:22,657
- Do you hear yourself?
- [Sighs]
466
00:17:22,702 --> 00:17:24,175
It's just when I see the Band-Aids,
467
00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:27,462
I think, "Who kissed the boo-boo?"
468
00:17:27,547 --> 00:17:31,432
Oh, girl, what's happening
with you is natural.
469
00:17:31,518 --> 00:17:34,235
On some level, you're the enemy now.
470
00:17:34,321 --> 00:17:35,904
"The ruiner of fun."
471
00:17:35,989 --> 00:17:36,905
"Ruiner of fun"?
472
00:17:36,990 --> 00:17:38,573
Their words, not mine.
473
00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:40,825
But come on, you remember
how it was with Mama.
474
00:17:40,944 --> 00:17:42,827
We stopped coming to her
with every little thing,
475
00:17:42,946 --> 00:17:44,662
but we still came to her
for the big things,
476
00:17:44,796 --> 00:17:47,163
like first kisses and big breakups
477
00:17:47,250 --> 00:17:49,634
and getting banned from Mervyn's
for shoplifting.
478
00:17:49,753 --> 00:17:51,452
- What?
- Mama never told you?
479
00:17:51,538 --> 00:17:53,504
- Unh-unh.
- Look.
480
00:17:53,623 --> 00:17:56,490
I know your kids getting older
isn't easy.
481
00:17:56,593 --> 00:17:57,959
But no one,
482
00:17:58,044 --> 00:18:00,878
not even someone as amazing as me,
483
00:18:00,997 --> 00:18:04,349
is going to replace you.
484
00:18:04,467 --> 00:18:07,051
Thanks, Dee.
485
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:10,104
Do they really call me
"the ruiner of fun"?
486
00:18:10,190 --> 00:18:13,274
They didn't say it as much
as they have a song about it.
487
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:15,661
Uh, it could be about anybody, though.
488
00:18:16,062 --> 00:18:17,083
Probably Paul.
489
00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:19,207
- [Laughs]
- Mm-hmm.
490
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:20,782
Mm-hmm.
491
00:18:20,867 --> 00:18:21,997
[Laughs]
492
00:18:22,052 --> 00:18:24,953
In 1987, I got to see the adults
493
00:18:25,038 --> 00:18:27,488
in my life grow and change.
494
00:18:27,574 --> 00:18:29,240
Oh, hey. You just missed dinner.
495
00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:30,825
Got here just in time.
496
00:18:30,910 --> 00:18:32,360
And you are...?
497
00:18:32,469 --> 00:18:35,576
- This is Mindy.
- Hey.
498
00:18:35,630 --> 00:18:37,630
Uh, what's your story?
499
00:18:37,702 --> 00:18:40,285
I don't have a story.
500
00:18:40,412 --> 00:18:42,112
I should get a story.
501
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,096
Okay. We can be friends.
502
00:18:44,207 --> 00:18:47,541
♪ When the going gets tough ♪
503
00:18:47,644 --> 00:18:48,876
My mother realized that
504
00:18:48,979 --> 00:18:50,878
even though her role was different...
505
00:18:50,981 --> 00:18:52,006
Mom?
506
00:18:52,232 --> 00:18:53,256
I need your help with something.
507
00:18:53,257 --> 00:18:55,049
...there would always be
a place for her.
508
00:18:55,151 --> 00:18:57,385
Tamika keeps going after
my jeans, and I want to sue.
509
00:18:57,487 --> 00:18:58,853
Uh, you can't afford me.
510
00:18:58,938 --> 00:18:59,988
♪ The tough get going ♪
511
00:19:00,073 --> 00:19:02,166
But I'll sit and hear your case.
512
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,109
♪ Whoa, whoa ♪
513
00:19:05,228 --> 00:19:07,913
And Dad learned he could give
his father advice.
514
00:19:07,946 --> 00:19:10,163
You're going back
to your old ways, huh?
515
00:19:10,234 --> 00:19:11,866
No, no, I introduced her as Mindy.
516
00:19:11,958 --> 00:19:13,669
I'm pretty sure that's her real name.
517
00:19:15,205 --> 00:19:16,597
Hey.
518
00:19:17,540 --> 00:19:19,240
[Clears throat]
519
00:19:19,342 --> 00:19:20,758
Thanks.
520
00:19:22,942 --> 00:19:24,762
For pushing me a little bit.
521
00:19:26,260 --> 00:19:27,860
Of course, Dad.
522
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:32,920
[Door opens]
523
00:19:33,048 --> 00:19:34,214
DENISE: Hold up.
524
00:19:34,215 --> 00:19:36,649
- Were you two about to cry?
- What? No.
525
00:19:36,674 --> 00:19:37,593
[Voice breaking] No.
526
00:19:37,594 --> 00:19:39,260
Also, there's a weird woman
527
00:19:39,362 --> 00:19:41,122
stealing a bunch of stuff upstairs.
528
00:19:41,747 --> 00:19:44,866
Cindy, time to go to Pizza Palace!
529
00:19:49,161 --> 00:19:51,611
DENISE: Introducing Denise Johnson's
530
00:19:51,713 --> 00:19:53,696
Accessory to Self-Defense.
531
00:19:53,799 --> 00:19:57,000
For only $19.95,
you can learn how to use
532
00:19:57,085 --> 00:20:00,537
everyday objects on your person
to protect yourself.
533
00:20:00,639 --> 00:20:02,472
Learn my specially developed techniques
534
00:20:02,558 --> 00:20:04,391
like Purse-Jitsu!
535
00:20:06,295 --> 00:20:07,677
Ninja Heel.
536
00:20:08,830 --> 00:20:10,297
No!
537
00:20:10,399 --> 00:20:12,265
Whoop-Ass Belt!
538
00:20:12,367 --> 00:20:13,767
Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo!
539
00:20:13,869 --> 00:20:15,835
And it's fun for the whole family.
540
00:20:15,938 --> 00:20:20,106
♪♪
541
00:20:20,225 --> 00:20:22,309
So call this number
542
00:20:22,411 --> 00:20:26,029
and order Denise Johnson's
Accessory to Self-Defense.
543
00:20:26,114 --> 00:20:29,783
Act now, and I'll throw in
a pair of boomerang bracelets.
544
00:20:29,885 --> 00:20:32,544
♪♪
545
00:20:32,629 --> 00:20:34,287
You doing good, kids.
546
00:20:35,907 --> 00:20:38,841
- Subs by kinglouisxx -
for www.addic7ed.com
38906
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