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THE SAFE WORKS?
CLEAN SHEETS?
SCENTED ROBES?
52 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT Paris, France
Goodbye.
- Did you forget something? - No, thanks.
Hello, may I help you?
Mr. Manager...
we have the mystery guest.
Thank you.
He'll be right here.
A FIVE STAR LIFE
Will you show me the spinach you meant?
Looks perfect, what's wrong?
We found snails.
Great, that's proof it's really organic.
Why else would our company be "Turf"?
Our customers know this, it's you I worry about.
Hi.
It's the Paris report, will you give it to him?
He's on a conference call, but wants to see you, can you wait?
No, I have too much to do. I've been all over for two weeks.
- You ripped them apart! - With what they have you pay!
I could have done much worse.
Don't lose the enclosed photos, they're worth seeing.
I'm Andrea, the one in charge.
They say there was a problem with the last delivery, what happened?
This cheese is inedible.
Yes, you're right.
Tell Carrozzoni we have a problem with the cheese,
then let's e-mail an apology to our customers
and with the next delivery everyone gets complimentary cheese.
Thank you for bothering to come all the way here.
I had to come this way and thought I'd show it to you...
The rest of the box was delicious.
Good.
May I send you a complimentary box? We have some wonderful pumpkins.
Thank you.
What box do you usually order?
The family-size or single?
Simona is pregnant and quit
and Marzia is getting married.
Marzia's getting married?
- What about the girlfriend?- They're getting married in Spain!
She wants to quit working to have time for the family.
They're thinking of having a baby, maybe of adopting one...
For Thursday.
So they both gave notice on the same day?
Right,
you're the only woman inspector left,
you'll have to take over their hotels.
More traveling, but more salary, is that okay?
Sure.
With women, it's always like this.
This is a job for singles with no husbands, kids, girlfriends.
Irene, are you there? Are you following?
I get it, I'm your ideal inspector because I don't have a life.
Goodbye.
- Can I take a bath? - Are you crazy?
It's almost dinner time, besides you know I'm against it.
Against what?
The tub, it takes too much water,
in 20 years there won't be any left.
More reason to have one now!
- You're smoking? - No!
I'll be dead in 20 years anyway.
- I wasn't smoking. - Sure...
Please, taste it!
- Delicious, did you make it? - No.
I got it from the Lebanese place-- the expensive one.
The expensive one!
It feels so good here!
I should stay with you when I get back from traveling.
Is it too much? Candles, roses...
It's a bit over the top.
- Better without? - No, leave them.
- You're sure? - Yes.
I'm off.
Okay...
- Where are you going now? - The movies.
- Who with? - Me, myself and I.
Nice little group!
I can see going in the afternoon... but isn't it a bit sad at night?
Nighttime shows are for losers?
As the day progresses, a person's desperation increases?
- Meaning? - I'll explain later.
Please come in.
Thank you.
- I brought some wine. - Thank you.
Did you do the cooking?
- Can I take your jacket? - Yes, thank you.
28 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT GSTAAD, SWITZERLAND
The work of a mystery guest starts in the lobby of a hotel.
Did the concierge look the guest in the eyes when speaking?
Did he smile?
Did he use your name when he welcomed you?
Was the wait at the desk less than two minutes?
Was the desk clerk's uniform clean and ironed?
Were his shoes adequate?
Does the hotel use a distinctive scent in the halls and rooms?
Were you given a full explanation on how
the lights the air conditioning, work?
Was the temperature suitable?
Did the steward wish the guest a pleasant stay?
FULL-LENGTH MIRROR?
DVD PLAYER?
Do you need anything, Mrs. Lorenzi?
No, thank you.
You're not going skiing on this beautiful day?
Oh God, no, I hate snow.
Are you here for work?
No...
A funeral.
I'm sorry, please forgive me.
Can I do anything for you?
Maybe the music.
Of course, I'll see to it right away.
Come on!
Good evening, we are...
I'm sorry, the concert's started, you can't go in now.
- If we slide into a side seat? - The doors are closed.
Just imagine what they'll say!
We know the concert by heart. He practices everyday.
But she said to get here on time!
- Did you know it's dodecaphonic? - It is?
Okay...
Ice cream?
A nice ice cream cone.
Here they are!
Daddy, I'm so sorry.
- We got held up. - Don't tell me, traffic?
Let's go have a pizza, I'm starving.
Can I have a calzone before the pizza?
- I want the one with lots of cheese. - Have what you like.
Where did I leave it?
Shall we meet there?
Wait a minute.
- She did it again. - She always parks on the crosswalk.
Dammit...
Where is the fucking car? It was here!
I'm in front of the auditorium, you towed my car.
Wait, I'll ask my husband. The plates?
I don't remember.
- Who's she talking to? - To the guys that tow cars.
She's got the number stored on her phone.
You took just mine, then that's it.
I'm starving.
- Me too. - Be patient.
I'll call a taxi again.
Another one? No, we all stay here together.
No more taxis, they mustn't get into the habit.
- They've taken two this evening. - You count the cabs?
Of course, they're regular kids, not Paris Hilton!
Paris Hilton? Restaurants close at 11.
They'll wait, they need to learn solidarity,
meaning we'll have a nice falafel all together,
they're open till late. What is it?
- No... - Falafel...
It seems they finally found it.
- Let's go or I'll faint away. - Let's go!
You have the keys.
Have you got them?
- Have you got them or not? - Yes!
Good morning, Mrs. Lorenzi, it's 8 AM.
and the outside temperature is 64 degrees Fahrenheit.
64 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT SAN CASCIANO DEI BAGNI, ITALY
Did you bring some money?
Do we have to pay to get in?
I don't think so.
Maybe you'd better go ask downstairs.
The spa is free of charge for all hotel guests.
- Thank you. - Not at all, don't mention it.
Good morning, I'll bring the menu right away.
- Are you alone? - Yes.
Hello, I'd like to order a club sandwich,
a Thai soup,
and a berry mixture with mango.
No mango. Then an orange Bavarian cream
and a Franciacorta to drink.
What happened?
You don't mind if I stay?
No, I'm glad, but what's wrong? You put me in a state.
I didn't want to tell you on the phone, sorry.
- Oh God, then it's serious. - Can I smoke here?
We'll get arrested here, we can go to the terrace.
Great, you started again?
Is she the one I passed in the elevator?
Yes.
What did you tell her?
I don't want to have a child with a stranger.
She's forcing it on me.
Fuck it, it's unfair!
Now it feels that way, but at that moment... sorry to say so.
She said she'll have the baby anyway,
because given her age, it's crazy not to,
it's her decision, and,
if I don't want to be the father, she won't expect anything from me.
She said that?
Hang on.
Hello, Mrs. Lorenzi.
Please sign here.
Thank you, goodbye.
What did he do wrong?
He didn't pour me a glass.
You know what worries me the most?
What are you doing?
The wine is two degrees too warm.
The soup should be at least 104º and it's not.
What a tragedy!
I know, but these are the kinds of problems I'm paid to deal with.
Done, tell me.
What troubles me the most is that...
Have a little soup.
Not now, will you just listen to me!
Because it was hot, sorry.
What are you writing?
- My novel. - Your novel?
- Didn't I tell you? - No.
- Can I read a few lines to you? - Yes.
It's the first draft, I'm a bit intimidated.
"At 1:45 PM I asked the concierge for the nearest pharmacy.
Not only did he not send someone to get
what I needed,
but he indicated the pharmacy to me
without worrying that I might..."
I see, it's not really my taste.
Wait, there's a dramatic turn of events!
Do you have to write this novel every time?
The plot's always the same.
- Eggs and American coffee. - Yes, please.
Sorry, there's a gentleman today, too.
I'm sorry, I hadn't noticed.
- Would you like something? - A large coffee.
I ordered eggs and bacon for you.
I don't eat savory things at breakfast.
Please, help me, I've put on two kilos since I got here.
- Find yourself an assistant. - I did!
Stress.
- What's her name? - Fabiana.
Fabiana what?
Cantoni.
And what does Fabiana Cantoni do?
She has a place that's half picture gallery, half coffee bar.
And if this had happened when we were together?
Would you have had a child with me?
- How's that fit here now? - It fits.
Answer me.
- No, I don't think so. - No?
Why not?
I don't know, I've never felt the need,
it's not mandatory, you know!
If we'd had one, he'd be 15.
Good thing we didn't!
I'm late, I have to go.
- We'll be in touch later. - Yes, I'll call you.
It made me feel better talking to you.
- Has the gentleman already left? - Yes, he was in a rush.
Forgive me for not coming promptly,
it's mayhem here today.
Apparently there's a mystery guest,
an incognito inspector, one who checks quality standards,
and we're all in quite a state.
He's behind you.
Eggs Benedict are poached eggs topped with Hollandaise sauce
served with bacon on an English muffin.
When taking the order,
is the waiter smiling and pleasant?
What's Hollandaise sauce?
A sauce made with egg yolks and butter, Madam.
Did he reply readily and courteously to any question about the menu?
I don't know...
I have other tables to serve, I'll be back in a moment.
A moment of distraction or edginess on the part of the waiter
cannot invalidate a score.
I'd kept an eye on two guests for three days
and they were constantly neglected.
You intend to lower our score for this small incident?
It might be small for you, sir.
But I remind you of our criteria for 5-stars:
it is a hotel that's supposed to be extraordinary,
by offering a unique experience through impeccable service.
The staff must be intuitive, enthusiastic, attentive
providing a service that exceeds expectations.
To grumble at a guest because he doesn't know what Eggs Benedict are
is not intuitive, nor enthusiastic, nor attentive.
That couple must receive the same treatment as the other guests,
even if it's their first time at a 5-star hotel,
even if their relatives gave them this honeymoon,
even if they wear beach robes to the pool and aren't chic.
Can I give you a hand?
Yes, when you're done, put the cigarette out and close the window.
I'm coming. It's out.
What can I do?
Auntie, help us clean these, they're all muddy.
Isn't packaged lettuce better, like from the supermarket?
Sure, but it doesn't have the same nutritional value...
I mean it's like eating paper. Do you like paper?
Andrea's veggies were picked 12 hours ago, they're fresher.
I always buy packaged lettuce.
What a pain! I have to talk to Federica on Skype.
I thought we'd agreed.
Let them go, we can do it.
Go on.
They always get their way.
I wanted to do something all together.
What fun, cleaning spinach!
Everyone in this house is always either on a computer or on the phone.
Tommaso has a thing with that game, "The Farm," do you know it?
No, what is it?
You buy a farm,
you can plant vegetables: carrots, potatoes.
You can also buy animals: pigs, cows, rabbits
and you can trade them.
You'll get a ton of potatoes for a cow,
a ton of grain for a rabbit.
But it's all virtual reality.
They're not real cows, horses,
it's all pretend animals.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
Not the rabbits! They're taking my rabbits away.
He's glued to that screen all day, harvesting, planting,
buying and trading animals.
There are 4 million people who play this game.
- How's his work going? - Fine.
I mean, today a musician's pay is half what a plumber makes.
Anyway, we know the place of culture in this country, don't we?
Actually, I'm worried about your situation.
Me? How come?
They have you pretend to be rich
and then give you a skilled worker's wage.
My bills are paid. I live in luxury hotels.
It could be worse.
Sure,
but you don't have a family, kids, a husband,
not even a steady job.
I wonder: what will Irene do twenty years from now?
Who'll take care of her?
You.
Okay, but what if I die first?
Them.
Your beloved nieces!
If you want to count on them, you'll have to invest more time.
You haven't built a real intimacy, sorry to tell you.
What are you saying?
Building a deep relationship takes much more commitment.
- You're so aggressive! - Me?
I'm worried, you're not a spring chicken and you're alone.
You should worry about your husband,
and the time he spends trading chickens.
88 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT MARRAKECH, MOROCCO
I can see you again next month,
in the meantime you can start the prenatal yoga course here.
Take a look at the leaflet on water birth,
so that you and your husband can think it over.
Of course.
- Want a lift? - No, thanks, I have a car.
Let me know when you make the next appointment.
Andrea, there's no need.
I told you I want to come.
As you like.
When will she get here? It's almost 9, I'm hungry.
She's on her way, be patient.
Call her, maybe she's right outside, so we can start the pasta.
I told her 8:30. She's not even 15 minutes late.
- Where is she? - She must have forgotten.
Come on, put the pasta in.
Vacation or work?
Work.
Let's see...
Photographer?
Writer?
Are you in politics?
Import/export of Berber carpets.
I give up.
Do you have to leave?
I'm in the tile business.
Tile?
Yes, handcrafted tiles.
I buy them wholesale from a company
specializing in renovation.
I have to do some at my house.
You could help me
choose the flooring for the patio.
A patio?
Terracotta,
it's easy.
Personally...
personally...
personally I'd avoid bright colors
with the exception of blue-- it's resistant to the elements.
Today there are special glues
to lay any type
of outside flooring,
but without the same results.
Back to the patio,
you should choose light colors.
The permeability of terracotta
is overestimated.
I'm not sure I believe this story.
I think, there's something else.
That means there's a secret.
Of course.
Could you be a spy?
Sort of.
Mine's there.
And mine's there.
You're a very beautiful woman,
but I'm very married, very faithful.
Me too.
Good night.
Would you say the hotel is right for younger people or the more mature?
Is it for families, couples, or singles?
May I help you?
I'd like to speak to the manager.
Oh sure... I'll get him right away.
Please take the lady to the manager.
Of course.
A small problem with the tiles in my room.
Do you think smoke is bad for vegetables?
It certainly does no good.
I have to be reliable. If I promise quality, I must guarantee it.
And here's me telling you...
Actually, we do very similar work.
Yes, but I'm always here and you're a world away.
I've got 300,000 free miles,
why don't we go to Brazil after the summer?
Five-star hotels, all expenses paid, wonderful... like the idea?
The baby's due at the end of summer.
That's right.
- Come on, let's go to the movies. - Okay, I'm done.
I'll turn this off...
Done, I'll put the cart in the fridge and I'm finished.
- What? - I'll put the cart in the fridge.
Please turn off the lights?
Hello, if you need anything, just ask.
No, thank you, I'm just looking.
Take your time.
That's right, for the 15th and 16th.
There are three of us, so I'll need a suite or two adjoining rooms.
Excellent, Mrs. Lorenzi, two adjoining rooms
for the 15th and the 16th.
82 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT SAVELLETRI DI FASANO, ITALY
Lift the bedcover and look at the sheet,
are there stains or whatnot?
Do the sheets have a nice scent?
- Everything's fine here, Auntie. - Here, too.
They're doing all right.
Girls, remember we're on a secret mission,
I'm your mother.
Go towards Fasano, then take the exit for Alberobello.
How many miles?
3 or 4 to get to Fasano
and another 2... about twelve miles.
Mom!
Ma'am, your girls are calling you.
Of course.
- Irene! - Right here.
Well?
Good, girls! Let's go!
We finished, Auntie.
I'll be right there.
No, not the toilet paper, no!
Oh no, what is this?
What's all this mess? Are you crazy?
Our inspection is one thing, being ill-behaved is another.
Put everything back the way you found it, right now!
When's your rehearsal tomorrow?
At four.
Will you take Eleonora to the pool?
Sure, no problem.
- What is it? - Nothing.
Why are you looking at me like that?
How? I'm not looking at you in any way.
Tommaso?
What?
Don't you ever think about it?
What?
The fact that...
we don't have sex anymore?
I'd like to know if this is a transitional phase
or whether there's no turning back,
what do you say?
I don't know, does it worry you?
A little.
Sorry, but don't you miss it?
- No. - No?
I mean yes, but I'm okay with it.
Then if you're okay with it...
Clearly, I do think about it sometimes,
but not obsessively.
It's not like, every night I'm thinking... you know?
Don't you ever have sexual dreams?
What? I don't know, I don't remember...
- It's normal. - Yes, I might have had one...
And you?
I do, very often recently,
but always with someone different.
With absurd people, that I don't even like in real life.
Like who, for example?
- Do you really want me to tell you? - Yes.
- With your accountant. - Franconi?
- Come on, he's an ogre! - Really.
And you?
Come on, they're just fantasies, I told you mine.
Come on, you have them.
Once with...
with Antonella, the flautist, the redhead.
The fat one? No!
Good Lord...
I think we should talk to someone.
Come on, cut it out.
I don't like it here anymore.
- Please. - Stop it!
You always spoil everything.
What happened?
Nothing happened.
I don't like staying here, I want to go home.
Don't listen to her, she's a baby, she'll stop.
I'm sorry I raised my voice earlier, I didn't mean to...
Don't make it a tragedy, come on.
I want Mommy.
It's just for tonight, we'll go home tomorrow.
- All right? - Okay.
Come on...
Thank you. Did they behave?
Well?
There's a tub, but you don't use one anyway.
Besides that?
It's huge.
It has just one more room than mine.
But why all this rush?
I told you, my lease's up
and I'd be closer to Fabiana for when the baby comes.
Fabiana lives around here?
Five minutes away.
Well, can you see me in here?
If you follow me, I'll show you the bedroom.
This way.
As you see,
it will hold a very large wardrobe
and the sleeping area's perfect, it's near your bathroom...
No, I'm a just a friend, we don't live together.
She's just here to give me her opinion.
Sorry, I misunderstood.
Well? What do you think?
I don't know...
The kitchen is tiny, there's no counter space.
Since you're always cooking, I wouldn't say it's ideal.
This room has a horrible view, the other's very small,
I just find it horribly depressing.
But you decide, I don't want to influence you.
You're not very encouraging though.
It's my opinion, do as you like, you're the one who has to live here.
The doors, I'd say, are nice.
Can't you find an early morning flight?
No, I'll hang on, so we can wrap it up.
I want to get there in the early morning for breakfast.
Not even the other airport?
No, it's not you!
Look again, check everything.
It's for a formal event,
I don't want to wear the usual black slacks!
7 is perfect, what time do I arrive?
Wonderful, book that one, thanks.
Yes, send me everything via e-mail.
- Try this. - No, I want to be more...
Bye, see you soon.
More what? Try this!
This looks terrible on you.
That bad?
Silvia, come on!
I can't come to dinner this evening,
I have to pack, I leave early tomorrow morning.
What did you mean the other dress wasn't me?
That you did well to buy the brown one, it suits you better.
You didn't say it didn't look good on me, but that it wasn't me.
Who do you think I am?
You're a woman who'd never wear that type of dress,
in fact, I've never seen one like it in your closet.
- You ran a red light. - I know.
How do you know what's in my closet?
Maybe I have ten dresses like that.
Then they still have the tags on them,
because I've never seen you wear them.
What's with you?
It's just that your things always come first, your trips, work,
your commitments.
Which is fine, but then don't think you can tell others what to do.
Do we have to argue over a dress?
Buy it, it looks awful on you, but if you want...
Again? It's not the dress, I said you're never around.
Your life comes before anything else.
In fact, I could have stayed home today,
instead I came with you to buy that fucking dress!
An event!
You don't have a family, kids, but you never have time!
You have Tommaso, two kids, and always have time for everything,
because you're like a soldier marching on,
and always judging others.
So, you think since I'm a mother and a wife, I should dress like a nun?
So I'm the one who's judging now!
Listen...
You look terrible in that dress, but go back and buy it,
you'll feel happier while cooking this evening. Bye!
Bitch!
Bitch!
66 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT BERLIN, GERMANY
Did the hotel personnel attend to your needs,
without being overbearing but indulging to your every wish?
Hi.
You're home?
Yes, the rehearsal's postponed till tomorrow.
Good for you, I've had a terrible day.
I got a fine and 3 points taken off my license.
No, the grease-cutter!
Are you tired?
Yes, I'm very tired.
Oh god, what's wrong?
You want to leave me.
Are you crazy?
No, of course I don't,
what's the matter?
Come on, darling.
Help me.
Hello?
Silvia, it's me.
What is it?
I'm in Berlin, but I'll be back in Italy today.
Would you pick me up at the airport?
Please, I really need...
Come pick me up, please, okay?
I can't, I'm sorry, I have a hell of a week.
Take a taxi like always. I have to go, bye.
They notified her ex-husband,
he hadn't seen her for 15 years,
but he was the only person who could legally sign those papers.
Suddenly I thought that I also...
Stop it, it could've happened to anyone.
Let me finish, it's important.
Suddenly I had a tremendous fear
because I've always thought of myself as free,
living a better life than most others
because they paid me to travel,
to sleep in luxury hotels,
but that's not freedom.
That's loneliness.
No,
that's how you see things now because you're so upset.
Come here.
I'm scared of losing you,
I'm terrified that the birth of this child will separate us.
I've said it.
What are you talking about?
I'll always be here for you.
Please, don't leave me.
No.
Sorry.
- What time is it? - It's 9:30.
Dammit, I'm late, I have an appointment.
Me too, it's so late, I have to stop by the house.
- How are you? - Fine, you?
Wonderful.
- Coffee? - Yes, please.
Shower?
- You take one first. - No, you first.
I'll go make coffee.
- A mug? - Yes.
Is the environment comfortable and welcoming?
Does it match your highest expectations?
Do you feel at home, do you perceive a sense of peace and contentment?
How would you define the unexpected feeling towards your best friend?
Could it be the solution to the angst you've felt lately?
- May I come in? - Yes.
- Did you forget something? - No. Are you going out?
No, I was...
Excuse me,
I want to say something important regarding last night.
Irene, don't worry, nothing happened last night.
Nothing? You're joking?
No, I mean we can talk when we have a bit of time.
No, now, or I won't be able to do anything else, I need...
- How are you? - Fine.
I'm just fine,
but I had an urgent appointment to look at another apartment.
I'll make it fast, I just wanted to say
it was a mistake to make love...
It's my fault, I don't know what got into me.
I'm leaving, maybe we can go another time.
No, this is Irene, a friend of mine.
- Yes, we've already met. - Already met?
- Yes... - Another time, there's no hurry.
Wait, Fabiana, please don't go!
Everything's wrong today!
Don't hate me, it's an order!
Listen, I don't know what you know about me,
what Andrea said, or worse, what you've heard,
but whatever you might have thought was wrong.
Listen...
Andrea and I were together once, but it ended a long time ago,
besides, it never worked between us for reasons I won't get into.
I don't know if you're really in love with him,
but I'm sure you now need to feel his presence,
because the baby's on his way, which is a beautiful thing...
even if it's a little scary.
Speaking of which, when is it due?
The end of October.
Andrea is so excited
and he's doing his best...
He is?
All right,
Andrea and I were together last night,
but it doesn't mean anything,
I'm sure he's sorry and so am I.
I'm sorry to have barged in at such a delicate moment,
I apologize.
But, please, go back upstairs,
look at the apartment.
He'll make a wonderful father
and this baby is already very lucky, you know.
It'll all work out, I promise you.
Don't look at me like that, you're scaring me.
- Hello. - Hello.
Who are you looking for?
Silvia Guerrieri.
That's me, this is my house, but I'm locked out.
I didn't order anything.
It says here. Anyway, it's paid in full. Just sign.
Hold it for me?
Have a good flight.
- Hello?- Hi, thanks.
Don't mention it.
I'm sorry about the argument, I should have called to apologize.
Let's drop the whole thing.
You can exchange it if it's not the right size.
Why don't you come by? I'll fix you something.
I don't know what, I'm locked out...
Maybe we could go out to eat.
I can't, I'm in the airport, I leave in half an hour.
Where are they sending you?
To Tanzania,
but not for work.
A colleague told me
about a small school in a remote village
where they're looking for a volunteer to teach children English.
I sent an e-mail, they answered
and I start on Monday.
What?
Really,
I thought I'd make a drastic change in my life
and I want to do it now, I need to do something useful.
Being in contact with children will do me good.
Are you crazy? Tell me you're joking.
Of course I'm joking,
I'm going to Shanghai with my free miles.
Is everything all right?
Yes, absolutely.
I'll call you when I get back.
Bye, Silvia, I love you.
I love you too, Irene, bye.
Now that you are about to leave the place where you've spent some time,
take a few seconds to evaluate your experience.
Did it match your expectations?
Would you recommend it to others,
even if you have felt at times uncomfortable or lonely?
You're still in time to choose, in the future,
a more comfortable and protected solution,
maybe more suitable to the needs of a family.
It is well to keep in mind, however, that happiness and well-being
are strictly personal concepts.
For some people the sense of freedom and adventure
is an essential part of the experience.
Trust your instinct,
this is your journey, the route to take is up to you.
A FIVE STAR LIFE
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