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1
00:00:13,648 --> 00:00:16,684
♪♪
2
00:00:34,464 --> 00:00:39,464
Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
3
00:00:39,641 --> 00:00:41,676
(car approaching)
4
00:00:46,548 --> 00:00:48,750
(door opens, closes)
5
00:00:48,783 --> 00:00:50,785
LORI:
Should we do something tonight?
6
00:00:50,818 --> 00:00:52,620
DOUG: We should.
We should finish packing.
7
00:00:52,654 --> 00:00:55,222
LORI: I can't,
I'm too tired.
8
00:00:55,255 --> 00:00:56,356
DOUG: Tough day?
9
00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:57,859
LORI: No. I made lattes.
10
00:00:57,892 --> 00:00:59,694
DOUG: We really should leave
by 8 tomorrow,
11
00:00:59,727 --> 00:01:00,828
I don't want to get stuck
in traffic.
12
00:01:00,862 --> 00:01:02,830
LORI:
You sound like your dad.
13
00:01:02,864 --> 00:01:07,334
DOUG (imitating dad): Why was
the squirrel late for work?
14
00:01:07,367 --> 00:01:10,572
Because traffic was nuts.
15
00:01:10,605 --> 00:01:12,406
LORI: Oh, boo!
16
00:01:12,439 --> 00:01:14,241
DOUG: (chuckles) Wait,
you don't like that one? I got more.
17
00:01:14,274 --> 00:01:17,444
LORI: If I promise we'll be
in the car by 8, will you stop?
18
00:01:17,477 --> 00:01:20,113
DOUG: Mm-hm.
19
00:01:20,147 --> 00:01:23,216
- Hey.
- WOMAN: I read the book you recommended.
20
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:24,451
- Mm...
- Oh, yeah?
21
00:01:24,484 --> 00:01:26,153
I didn't like it.
22
00:01:26,186 --> 00:01:28,890
Your food will be ready
in five minutes.
23
00:01:28,923 --> 00:01:30,190
Thanks.
24
00:01:32,359 --> 00:01:33,427
She did not like it.
25
00:01:33,460 --> 00:01:34,562
She mean.
26
00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:44,137
No? I'm hungry.
27
00:01:44,171 --> 00:01:47,374
Well, I mean, we could order
some Chinese take-out,
28
00:01:47,407 --> 00:01:48,676
you know,
if you're hungry.
29
00:01:48,710 --> 00:01:51,713
Wow, what a suggestion.
Thank you.
30
00:01:51,746 --> 00:01:53,781
Yeah, you're welcome.
It's just a thought.
31
00:01:53,815 --> 00:01:56,851
♪♪
32
00:01:56,884 --> 00:01:59,353
- Oh.
- Oh?
33
00:01:59,386 --> 00:02:00,487
What's happening?
34
00:02:00,521 --> 00:02:02,824
I don't know.
What is happening?
35
00:02:02,857 --> 00:02:05,927
Oh, it is.
You like this.
36
00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:09,196
♪♪
37
00:02:12,700 --> 00:02:15,402
- (laughs)
- Stupid.
38
00:02:15,435 --> 00:02:17,605
- Am I embarrassing you?
- Mm-hm.
39
00:02:17,639 --> 00:02:20,173
I can do this all day.
40
00:02:20,207 --> 00:02:22,610
(laughs)
41
00:02:22,644 --> 00:02:23,711
Marry me.
42
00:02:25,947 --> 00:02:27,214
(vomits)
43
00:02:57,277 --> 00:02:58,780
(car engine starts)
44
00:03:06,821 --> 00:03:09,824
♪♪
45
00:05:07,909 --> 00:05:08,910
Hey...
46
00:05:08,943 --> 00:05:11,579
Morning.
47
00:05:11,612 --> 00:05:13,313
Can we at least
talk about last night?
48
00:05:16,117 --> 00:05:18,052
You should get dressed,
we gotta get on the road.
49
00:05:20,788 --> 00:05:22,657
- Doug.
- Lori.
50
00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:28,129
You can't possibly think
you're coming, you dumped me.
51
00:05:28,162 --> 00:05:29,964
Uh, yeah I am.
I'm in the wedding.
52
00:05:29,997 --> 00:05:31,866
You're barely in
the wedding.
53
00:05:31,899 --> 00:05:33,835
I'm the King of the Ushers.
54
00:05:36,671 --> 00:05:39,874
Well, it's my sister.
You're not coming.
55
00:05:41,809 --> 00:05:43,644
(sighs)
56
00:05:43,678 --> 00:05:47,114
Do we really need
all this shit?
57
00:05:47,148 --> 00:05:49,449
Uh, yeah.
Yeah, we do.
58
00:05:50,818 --> 00:05:52,119
(cell phone buzzing)
59
00:05:59,160 --> 00:06:00,427
Bea texted.
60
00:06:05,132 --> 00:06:06,499
What are you gonna tell her?
61
00:06:09,070 --> 00:06:10,771
(horn blowing)
62
00:06:10,805 --> 00:06:11,873
- Hey, did I press play?
- Yeah.
63
00:06:11,906 --> 00:06:13,741
- I'm sorry, I...
- Yes!
64
00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,977
I know, but I just keep taking
pictures instead of video.
65
00:06:16,010 --> 00:06:19,180
- Um, hey, I'm Jayson
- I'm Bea, I'm on a boat!
66
00:06:19,213 --> 00:06:20,715
Baby, you don't have to be
that loud.
67
00:06:20,748 --> 00:06:22,717
- What? Wait...
- Okay, we're excited.
68
00:06:22,750 --> 00:06:26,419
Anyways, I know this is, uh,
probably gonna be a little strange, um,
69
00:06:26,453 --> 00:06:27,889
but... but here goes nothing.
70
00:06:27,922 --> 00:06:30,858
Four weeks ago,
I was at the Sydney airport,
71
00:06:30,892 --> 00:06:33,661
and I heard this person going
on and on and on...
72
00:06:33,694 --> 00:06:35,529
No, I wasn't.
I was just talking.
73
00:06:35,563 --> 00:06:37,865
I'm simply talking about
playing Skee-Ball at
74
00:06:37,899 --> 00:06:40,034
the Lake of the Ozarks
in Missouri, so...
75
00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:42,770
Which is exactly what
I used to do when I was a kid,
76
00:06:42,803 --> 00:06:45,506
and I'd never met ev...
ever met anyone else
77
00:06:45,539 --> 00:06:47,875
- who would ever know what Lake of the Ozarks is.
- Lake of the Ozarks!
78
00:06:47,909 --> 00:06:50,778
Okay, so this is not
just an introduction,
79
00:06:50,811 --> 00:06:51,946
'cause like I said,
I am Bea.
80
00:06:51,979 --> 00:06:53,180
- Yep.
- Beatrice.
81
00:06:53,214 --> 00:06:55,116
Yeah, and I'm Jayson.
Jayson.
82
00:06:55,149 --> 00:06:57,852
It's also an announcement.
'Cause we're getting married!
83
00:06:57,885 --> 00:06:59,787
- Yeah, so we're getting married.
- We're getting married!
84
00:06:59,820 --> 00:07:02,790
(giggling) Okay,
so when the video ends,
85
00:07:02,823 --> 00:07:05,192
that'll be my grand entrance
to my favorite song.
86
00:07:05,226 --> 00:07:06,827
"Pony," by Ginuwine.
87
00:07:06,861 --> 00:07:08,896
Yeah, with a G.
88
00:07:08,930 --> 00:07:10,631
Perfect.
89
00:07:10,665 --> 00:07:12,166
We're just so thrilled
that you've chosen
90
00:07:12,199 --> 00:07:14,769
the Arrowhead Pines Lodge
for your special day.
91
00:07:14,802 --> 00:07:17,104
Well, Bea loved it here when
it was a summer camp, so...
92
00:07:17,138 --> 00:07:19,941
I always thought my wedding
should be fun, you know?
93
00:07:19,974 --> 00:07:21,642
And what is more fun than
getting married
94
00:07:21,676 --> 00:07:25,146
at the place where you got
your first period?
95
00:07:25,179 --> 00:07:28,215
♪♪
96
00:07:47,601 --> 00:07:49,203
Hi. We have a reservation.
97
00:07:49,236 --> 00:07:51,172
- Name?
- But...
98
00:07:51,205 --> 00:07:54,275
um, we just...
we have a king bed and we need two beds.
99
00:07:54,308 --> 00:07:55,576
Please.
100
00:07:59,613 --> 00:08:02,283
(sighs)
101
00:08:02,316 --> 00:08:04,685
Yeah, thing is,
we're fully booked.
102
00:08:04,719 --> 00:08:06,687
We have a wedding
this weekend.
103
00:08:06,721 --> 00:08:08,022
Yes, I am aware,
it is my sister's wedding.
104
00:08:08,055 --> 00:08:09,657
No, we'll just keep
the suite.
105
00:08:09,690 --> 00:08:11,125
What are you gonna do,
sleep on the floor?
106
00:08:11,158 --> 00:08:13,094
Can't you just, like,
upgrade someone else?
107
00:08:13,127 --> 00:08:15,262
We'll take whatever.
108
00:08:15,296 --> 00:08:17,531
I can switch you guys
over to a cabin.
109
00:08:17,565 --> 00:08:18,632
Great.
110
00:08:18,666 --> 00:08:20,267
They're not heated, though.
111
00:08:20,301 --> 00:08:21,902
Who needs heat.
112
00:08:21,936 --> 00:08:23,904
Okay, well, I have to
type all of this in,
113
00:08:23,938 --> 00:08:25,606
so it's gonna be
a couple hours.
114
00:08:25,639 --> 00:08:28,109
- Take your time.
- Okay.
115
00:08:29,210 --> 00:08:31,879
(sighs)
116
00:08:31,912 --> 00:08:33,114
Oh, shit.
117
00:08:33,147 --> 00:08:35,016
(indistinct chatter)
118
00:08:35,049 --> 00:08:38,285
- You ready for this?
- No.
119
00:08:38,319 --> 00:08:40,187
Neither am I.
120
00:08:40,221 --> 00:08:41,655
Run.
121
00:08:41,689 --> 00:08:43,924
- Ah! Oh, my God!
- Oh, my... Hey.
122
00:08:43,958 --> 00:08:46,794
- Mom!
- Hi. My favorite couple.
123
00:08:46,827 --> 00:08:48,329
- Hey.
- How are you?
124
00:08:48,362 --> 00:08:50,865
I thought you guys were gonna
get here earlier.
125
00:08:50,898 --> 00:08:52,299
We were hoping to
have lunch with you,
126
00:08:52,333 --> 00:08:55,102
but your grandparents
got hungry at 10:30.
127
00:08:55,136 --> 00:08:57,872
Oh, well, you know,
we were, um, delayed.
128
00:08:57,905 --> 00:08:59,106
Anyway...
129
00:08:59,140 --> 00:09:01,275
What happened?
130
00:09:01,308 --> 00:09:04,645
We, uh...
131
00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:06,981
Uh, we... we, uh...
we hit a bird.
132
00:09:07,014 --> 00:09:09,850
Oh, no. Is it okay?
133
00:09:11,619 --> 00:09:12,887
It's dead.
134
00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:15,723
It's so nice to see you.
135
00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:18,125
You too.
Oh, God.
136
00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:24,298
Ugh! They get engaged after
a couple of days.
137
00:09:24,331 --> 00:09:26,734
She wants to get married
at her old summer camp.
138
00:09:26,767 --> 00:09:28,636
Oh, well, I think it's
kinda cool to get married at...
139
00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:31,172
There are friendship bracelets
in the welcome bags.
140
00:09:31,205 --> 00:09:33,107
Mom, you promised.
141
00:09:36,744 --> 00:09:39,113
They'll be through
by Christmas.
142
00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:41,082
Watch.
143
00:09:41,115 --> 00:09:43,217
- Hey, sis. What's up?
- Hi.
144
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:45,653
Lori, good to see you.
145
00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:46,854
- Dougie.
- Hey, man, what's up?
146
00:09:46,887 --> 00:09:48,722
- Hey.
- Oh, boy. All right.
147
00:09:48,756 --> 00:09:50,691
- Yeah.
- Hey!
148
00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:53,294
- Oh, man.
- It's so great to finally meet you.
149
00:09:53,327 --> 00:09:55,763
- Yeah.
- Gosh. Hey, um, the wedding planner
150
00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:59,300
absolutely loved your ribbon
on the chair idea, so...
151
00:09:59,333 --> 00:10:01,168
A lot of people like ribbon.
152
00:10:01,202 --> 00:10:04,405
Yeah, I mean, I...
I personally love ribbons.
153
00:10:04,438 --> 00:10:08,075
I think I see Aunt Jean.
154
00:10:08,109 --> 00:10:10,010
(squealing) You're here!
You're here!
155
00:10:10,044 --> 00:10:11,345
- There she is, there she is.
- Oh, my God, you're here.
156
00:10:11,378 --> 00:10:12,913
- Hi.
- Oh, my God.
157
00:10:12,947 --> 00:10:14,048
A little excited
to see her sister.
158
00:10:14,081 --> 00:10:15,816
- A little bit.
- Yeah.
159
00:10:15,850 --> 00:10:17,718
- Look at your hair.
- Oh, yeah. Check this out.
160
00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:19,286
Oh, wow.
161
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:21,355
So I rented a store front.
I'm launching, like,
162
00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:23,157
as soon as I get back from
the honeymoon.
163
00:10:23,190 --> 00:10:25,126
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hang on.
Wait. Launching what?
164
00:10:25,159 --> 00:10:26,293
Scrunchies.
165
00:10:26,327 --> 00:10:28,362
Bespoke scrunchies.
166
00:10:28,395 --> 00:10:30,898
- Seriously?
- Yeah. Jay's an early investor.
167
00:10:30,931 --> 00:10:33,033
You gotta get in on
the ground floor.
168
00:10:33,067 --> 00:10:34,401
And I screwed that up with
the Honest Company.
169
00:10:34,435 --> 00:10:37,705
Friggin' Jessica Alba.
Genius.
170
00:10:37,738 --> 00:10:40,040
Okay, I was gonna wait until
the day of the wedding,
171
00:10:40,074 --> 00:10:41,408
but here you go.
172
00:10:41,442 --> 00:10:46,180
Oh, my God. (gasps)
Oh. Oh, hey.
173
00:10:46,213 --> 00:10:48,182
So everyone knows
you're my maid of honor.
174
00:10:48,215 --> 00:10:50,050
Yeah, I lo...
I love it.
175
00:10:50,084 --> 00:10:51,452
- Yeah?
- It's beautiful.
176
00:10:51,485 --> 00:10:52,953
- I put it on like this?
- Please.
177
00:10:52,987 --> 00:10:56,824
Okay.
Yeah, you like?
178
00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:59,760
- Hi.
- Hi.
179
00:10:59,793 --> 00:11:01,061
It looks really great.
180
00:11:02,897 --> 00:11:06,333
God. God, I love this hoodie.
I love how old it looks.
181
00:11:06,367 --> 00:11:07,935
Did it come that way?
182
00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:09,770
No, it's just old.
183
00:11:09,803 --> 00:11:11,338
- Hm. Like Jay?
- Yeah. (chuckles)
184
00:11:11,372 --> 00:11:12,973
- What'd you just say?
- Nothing.
185
00:11:13,007 --> 00:11:15,009
- She called you old, man.
- Oh... (chuckles)
186
00:11:15,042 --> 00:11:18,312
Guilty. I am older than her,
this is true.
187
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:20,848
Hey, what suite
are you guys staying in?
188
00:11:20,881 --> 00:11:22,216
- Uh...
- Oh, uh, we actually...
189
00:11:22,249 --> 00:11:23,384
We switched to one of
the cabins.
190
00:11:23,417 --> 00:11:25,386
- Oh... cozy.
- Ah, fine.
191
00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:27,121
But we can't get in for a couple of
hours, so we're...
192
00:11:27,154 --> 00:11:28,489
- What?
- Yeah.
193
00:11:28,523 --> 00:11:30,858
Let me go talk to Mike.
194
00:11:30,891 --> 00:11:32,026
Go get 'em, baby.
195
00:11:34,328 --> 00:11:37,798
U... (clears throat)
196
00:11:37,831 --> 00:11:39,266
Where's the N?
197
00:11:39,300 --> 00:11:40,734
Hey, Mike.
198
00:11:40,768 --> 00:11:42,236
- Oh, what's up?
- What's up?
199
00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:45,339
(chuckles) Hey, um,
did you cut your hair?
200
00:11:45,372 --> 00:11:46,974
No, it's just behind
my shoulders.
201
00:11:47,007 --> 00:11:48,175
Ah, see, before,
you had it in the front.
202
00:11:48,209 --> 00:11:49,843
- Yeah.
- In the front.
203
00:11:49,877 --> 00:11:51,979
So, my brother and sister
just got here.
204
00:11:52,012 --> 00:11:53,814
- They need a room.
- Right.
205
00:11:53,847 --> 00:11:56,350
Yeah, they... can they get...
can they get one now?
206
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:58,219
Yeah, I told them I could maybe
switch 'em to a cabin.
207
00:11:58,252 --> 00:12:00,120
- Oh, sweet.
- Yeah, they got...
208
00:12:00,154 --> 00:12:02,756
You got... Do you have...
Can they... Can they get a key?
209
00:12:02,790 --> 00:12:05,025
Yeah, yeah, I got a couple,
I have, uh, Red Rover,
210
00:12:05,059 --> 00:12:07,494
Hopscotch, and
Duck, Duck, Goose.
211
00:12:07,529 --> 00:12:09,230
Which one do you recommend?
212
00:12:09,263 --> 00:12:10,532
- Duck, Duck, Goose.
- Sweet.
213
00:12:10,565 --> 00:12:12,299
- Red Rover's haunted.
- What?
214
00:12:12,333 --> 00:12:13,834
- Yeah.
- Nice.
215
00:12:15,570 --> 00:12:18,105
Cha-ching! You guys are in
Duck, Duck, Goose.
216
00:12:18,138 --> 00:12:20,908
All right. Uh,
what does that mean?
217
00:12:20,941 --> 00:12:22,243
I guess you'll find out.
218
00:12:22,276 --> 00:12:23,844
(laughing)
219
00:12:23,877 --> 00:12:25,412
Oh, look, honey,
it's Dominic.
220
00:12:25,446 --> 00:12:27,881
- Which one's Dominic?
- Dominic, my Peace Corps buddy.
221
00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:29,416
- From Swaziland.
- What...
222
00:12:29,450 --> 00:12:31,018
- Dude has six toes.
- Oh, my God, yes!
223
00:12:31,051 --> 00:12:32,319
Yeah, I know,
it's so gross.
224
00:12:32,353 --> 00:12:33,954
Let's...
Let's go talk to him.
225
00:12:33,988 --> 00:12:35,422
This is just gonna be
so much easier
226
00:12:35,456 --> 00:12:36,524
when it's you two
getting married.
227
00:12:36,558 --> 00:12:38,359
You already know everyone.
228
00:12:38,392 --> 00:12:39,460
BEA: Hi.
229
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:48,235
♪♪
230
00:13:39,286 --> 00:13:40,821
A lot of fuckin' ducks
in here.
231
00:13:47,127 --> 00:13:50,431
And it is, technically,
two beds.
232
00:13:50,464 --> 00:13:52,032
I'm gonna take a shower.
233
00:14:10,084 --> 00:14:11,251
(lock clicks)
234
00:14:19,694 --> 00:14:20,961
(lock clicks)
235
00:14:33,941 --> 00:14:36,143
Hey, do you mind if
I wash my hands before you...
236
00:14:38,345 --> 00:14:39,413
(rattling)
237
00:14:44,451 --> 00:14:46,487
(water running)
238
00:15:28,095 --> 00:15:31,131
♪♪
239
00:15:35,102 --> 00:15:36,103
Five minutes.
240
00:15:36,136 --> 00:15:37,271
Cool.
241
00:15:39,373 --> 00:15:41,475
- You feelin' okay?
- Uh, yeah, yeah.
242
00:15:41,509 --> 00:15:44,044
I just gotta, um...
243
00:15:44,077 --> 00:15:46,046
Yeah, uh, bathroom.
244
00:15:46,079 --> 00:15:48,115
(indistinct chatter)
245
00:15:58,459 --> 00:16:00,127
Lori.
246
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:03,531
Hey, it's, uh, Eric.
I'm Bea's friend.
247
00:16:03,565 --> 00:16:05,165
From back in high school.
248
00:16:05,199 --> 00:16:06,333
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah.
249
00:16:06,366 --> 00:16:07,635
- What's up?
- Eric, hi.
250
00:16:07,669 --> 00:16:09,236
- Hey.
- Oh, my God, you're an adult.
251
00:16:09,269 --> 00:16:11,038
- Yeah, yeah.
- And you're very tall.
252
00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:13,340
Yeah.
What's up?
253
00:16:13,373 --> 00:16:14,576
- Hi.
- Hey.
254
00:16:32,627 --> 00:16:34,094
All right.
255
00:16:34,127 --> 00:16:36,196
So, uh, tell me what
you've been up to?
256
00:16:36,230 --> 00:16:38,465
Um... not much, man,
257
00:16:38,499 --> 00:16:42,202
I'm just still working at
my dad's landscaping company.
258
00:16:42,236 --> 00:16:47,074
Just gettin' baked
and mowing lawns and...
259
00:16:47,107 --> 00:16:48,408
So, just like high school?
260
00:16:48,442 --> 00:16:50,578
Just like high school.
261
00:16:50,612 --> 00:16:52,212
Um, what about you?
262
00:16:52,246 --> 00:16:53,548
I work at a coffee shop.
263
00:16:53,581 --> 00:16:57,484
Nice. As, like,
a manager or...
264
00:16:57,519 --> 00:16:59,286
No.
265
00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:00,588
Oh...
266
00:17:02,256 --> 00:17:05,259
God, Lori fuckin' Anderson.
267
00:17:05,292 --> 00:17:07,261
It's good to see you.
268
00:17:07,294 --> 00:17:09,096
Good to see you, too.
269
00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:17,639
Oh, shit. Whoa!
270
00:17:17,672 --> 00:17:19,541
Sorry. Um...
271
00:17:19,574 --> 00:17:21,108
Sorry, everybody.
272
00:17:21,141 --> 00:17:23,076
- Uh...
- BEA: Go, Doug!
273
00:17:23,110 --> 00:17:25,379
DOUG: Technical difficulties.
I'm so sorry.
274
00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:27,749
Uh...
275
00:17:28,883 --> 00:17:31,485
Hi. Uh...
276
00:17:31,519 --> 00:17:37,157
Doug. Um, so... so Bea asked me
to... to speak this weekend,
277
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:41,563
um, and given that the, uh...
278
00:17:41,596 --> 00:17:43,397
the best man speaks at
the wedding,
279
00:17:43,430 --> 00:17:45,867
and the groomsmen speak at
the rehearsal dinner,
280
00:17:45,900 --> 00:17:48,870
um, uh,
she wasn't exactly sure
281
00:17:48,903 --> 00:17:52,339
when the King of the Ushers
should speak,
282
00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:56,343
um, but, uh, she eventually decided
that tonight was... was safe, you know,
283
00:17:56,376 --> 00:18:00,615
before any of the important
out-of-town guests arrive.
284
00:18:00,648 --> 00:18:03,551
- (chuckling)
- Um...
285
00:18:03,585 --> 00:18:04,719
so, um...
286
00:18:08,488 --> 00:18:13,327
So when... when Bea and I
first met, uh...
287
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:15,429
- she was drunk.
- (laughter)
288
00:18:15,462 --> 00:18:19,299
She... Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, it gets worse.
289
00:18:19,333 --> 00:18:22,670
She was also in middle school.
290
00:18:22,704 --> 00:18:25,238
- Um...
- (laughter)
291
00:18:25,272 --> 00:18:27,140
I had, uh...
292
00:18:27,174 --> 00:18:30,444
I had just started dating
this... this wonderful girl,
293
00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:35,215
uh... Lori, and, um,
294
00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:37,619
we'd only been going out
for a few weeks,
295
00:18:37,652 --> 00:18:41,623
but she invited me to come to
her mom's house for Thanksgiving.
296
00:18:41,656 --> 00:18:43,591
So Lori and I were
up in her room,
297
00:18:43,625 --> 00:18:49,429
and we hear this...
this strange crash from outside.
298
00:18:49,463 --> 00:18:51,198
(laughing)
Oh, my God.
299
00:18:51,231 --> 00:18:53,935
Which is, apparently,
the sound that you make
300
00:18:53,968 --> 00:19:00,575
when you ride your sled into
a concrete birdbath
301
00:19:00,608 --> 00:19:03,276
after downing
12 Jell-O shots
302
00:19:03,310 --> 00:19:07,749
at your BFF's
Black Friday party.
303
00:19:07,782 --> 00:19:10,752
Anyway, I... I spent that...
that night in the ER
304
00:19:10,785 --> 00:19:13,353
with my... my new girlfriend,
and, uh...
305
00:19:13,387 --> 00:19:14,722
and her little sister,
306
00:19:14,756 --> 00:19:18,358
and we talked about
life and love,
307
00:19:18,392 --> 00:19:21,829
and how much it hurts
to throw up
308
00:19:21,863 --> 00:19:23,898
after knocking
out all your teeth.
309
00:19:23,931 --> 00:19:27,835
- (laughter)
- And, uh... And we bonded.
310
00:19:27,869 --> 00:19:32,305
And so, uh, I'm...
I'm so, so happy
311
00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:35,810
to... to be here to...
312
00:19:35,843 --> 00:19:39,212
to, uh...
to congratulate you,
313
00:19:39,246 --> 00:19:42,917
um, after ten years.
You know?
314
00:19:42,950 --> 00:19:45,887
Um, ten years as a...
as a...
315
00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:49,222
as a part of this family,
um...
316
00:19:49,256 --> 00:19:50,558
to congratulate you
on your marriage.
317
00:19:50,591 --> 00:19:52,827
Uh, you're...
Here's to you, Bea.
318
00:19:52,860 --> 00:19:55,395
You're the...
319
00:19:55,429 --> 00:19:57,532
the little sister
that I never had.
320
00:19:57,565 --> 00:20:00,233
- Mmm...
- (applause)
321
00:20:04,672 --> 00:20:06,339
It was perfect.
322
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:07,975
- It wasn't too much?
- No, I loved it.
323
00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:16,851
BEA: Where's my champagne?
324
00:20:35,368 --> 00:20:38,005
You okay?
325
00:20:38,039 --> 00:20:39,507
Oh, yeah, peachy.
326
00:20:42,610 --> 00:20:45,546
Yeah, I saw you leave,
I just thought that...
327
00:20:45,580 --> 00:20:47,314
- I got drinks.
- Hey.
328
00:20:47,347 --> 00:20:49,282
- Hey.
- That's for you.
329
00:20:49,316 --> 00:20:50,852
That one's for Dougie.
330
00:20:50,885 --> 00:20:53,054
And I think that's the one
with the mescaline.
331
00:20:53,087 --> 00:20:55,489
- Hm?
- No, I meant...
332
00:20:55,523 --> 00:20:58,325
mescal, I don't know,
just drink it.
333
00:20:58,358 --> 00:21:00,695
Hey, so, um...
334
00:21:00,728 --> 00:21:02,830
we needed to tell you
something, uh...
335
00:21:02,864 --> 00:21:05,298
Uh, yeah.
336
00:21:05,332 --> 00:21:07,969
Yeah, okay.
Um, we needed to t...
337
00:21:08,002 --> 00:21:10,004
Uh, we want to tell you...
338
00:21:10,037 --> 00:21:12,707
- We, uh...
- What?
339
00:21:12,740 --> 00:21:16,844
- That we, um...
- We...
340
00:21:16,878 --> 00:21:21,616
- BEA: What?
- We are so happy for you.
341
00:21:21,649 --> 00:21:26,020
We're so, uh... I'm just
so happy for you, sweetie.
342
00:21:26,053 --> 00:21:27,855
- Really?
- Yeah.
343
00:21:27,889 --> 00:21:29,356
You promise?
344
00:21:29,389 --> 00:21:31,559
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
we're just...
345
00:21:31,592 --> 00:21:32,994
we're so happy
for you guys.
346
00:21:33,027 --> 00:21:34,729
- Really?
- Totally.
347
00:21:34,762 --> 00:21:36,597
- Yeah.
- You're getting married, my little sister.
348
00:21:36,631 --> 00:21:38,633
- Ahh!
- (giggling)
349
00:21:38,666 --> 00:21:40,635
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
350
00:21:40,668 --> 00:21:42,069
BEA: (squeals)
I'm getting married!
351
00:21:42,103 --> 00:21:43,638
LORI: You sure are.
352
00:21:43,671 --> 00:21:47,340
What the fuck? Lori.
353
00:21:47,374 --> 00:21:49,877
We had a plan.
354
00:21:49,911 --> 00:21:52,747
Yes, I know.
I just...
355
00:21:52,780 --> 00:21:55,082
Come on,
she looks so happy.
356
00:21:55,116 --> 00:21:56,784
Okay, so then when are we
gonna tell her,
357
00:21:56,818 --> 00:21:58,719
like, when she's at
the rehearsal dinner,
358
00:21:58,753 --> 00:21:59,987
when she's walking down
the aisle?
359
00:22:00,021 --> 00:22:02,455
I don't know, I just...
I don't know,
360
00:22:02,489 --> 00:22:06,426
maybe we could just
not tell her?
361
00:22:06,459 --> 00:22:07,929
Maybe we could just
not tell anyone.
362
00:22:10,665 --> 00:22:12,800
Wait, you mean pretend
we're still together?
363
00:22:12,834 --> 00:22:15,136
Shh.
364
00:22:15,169 --> 00:22:17,738
It's just... just until
the wedding is over.
365
00:22:20,641 --> 00:22:22,577
- I don't know.
- Please?
366
00:22:24,111 --> 00:22:25,680
Please?
367
00:22:25,713 --> 00:22:27,915
Three days?
368
00:22:27,949 --> 00:22:29,784
- Three days.
- Okay, Doug, Doug,
369
00:22:29,817 --> 00:22:31,586
can Lori stay with me
tonight?
370
00:22:31,619 --> 00:22:33,420
'Cause Jayson's, like,
crashing with the guys,
371
00:22:33,453 --> 00:22:35,488
and just...
I don't want to be alone.
372
00:22:35,523 --> 00:22:37,758
Oh, yeah, sure, I was gonna
call it a night anyway.
373
00:22:37,792 --> 00:22:39,660
No, no, no, wait.
What time is it?
374
00:22:39,694 --> 00:22:41,095
Well, look, I'm beat,
375
00:22:41,128 --> 00:22:42,763
and we got the whole
weekend to hang.
376
00:22:42,797 --> 00:22:45,900
So, I'll see you...
in the morning?
377
00:22:45,933 --> 00:22:47,802
- Huh?
- Fine.
378
00:22:47,835 --> 00:22:49,402
- So hug me.
- All right.
379
00:22:49,436 --> 00:22:51,105
Mm-hm.
380
00:22:51,138 --> 00:22:53,741
Mm... All right.
Kiss Lori.
381
00:22:56,811 --> 00:22:59,080
Oh, my God,
so lame.
382
00:22:59,113 --> 00:23:00,380
Try again.
383
00:23:07,655 --> 00:23:09,523
Hm. So gross.
384
00:23:11,559 --> 00:23:14,595
♪♪
385
00:23:29,243 --> 00:23:31,779
JAYSON: Dougie!
386
00:23:31,812 --> 00:23:35,482
- Yo.
- JAYSON: Hey, come meet the guys.
387
00:23:35,516 --> 00:23:36,717
- Hi, bud.
- Hey, man.
388
00:23:36,751 --> 00:23:38,586
Come here.
Good to see ya.
389
00:23:38,619 --> 00:23:41,689
Hey, uh, this is Ari,
Dominic and Chaz.
390
00:23:41,722 --> 00:23:44,859
- This is Doug.
- Hey. Ari, best man, officiant.
391
00:23:44,892 --> 00:23:46,627
- Uh...
- Oh, no, I'm good.
392
00:23:46,661 --> 00:23:48,763
Have a seat.
Have a seat, bud.
393
00:23:48,796 --> 00:23:50,097
Oh, hey, nice speech.
394
00:23:50,131 --> 00:23:54,168
Ah, Doug, seriously,
that speech.
395
00:23:54,201 --> 00:23:56,137
- Oh, thanks, man.
- Yeah. Yeah, I mean,
396
00:23:56,170 --> 00:23:58,973
you must be in
big fuckin' trouble.
397
00:23:59,006 --> 00:24:00,841
What do you mean?
398
00:24:00,875 --> 00:24:02,076
Uh, the younger sister
getting married
399
00:24:02,109 --> 00:24:03,577
before the older one?
400
00:24:03,611 --> 00:24:05,046
That's some
Jane Austen shit.
401
00:24:05,079 --> 00:24:06,714
Yeah, well, you know.
402
00:24:06,747 --> 00:24:08,049
Lori doesn't really care
about marriage.
403
00:24:08,082 --> 00:24:10,151
She doesn't really care
about anything.
404
00:24:10,184 --> 00:24:11,752
So...
405
00:24:11,786 --> 00:24:13,955
Mazel. To, uh,
women who don't care.
406
00:24:17,158 --> 00:24:19,492
I can't believe
this fuckin' room.
407
00:24:19,527 --> 00:24:22,897
Mm. Well...
408
00:24:22,930 --> 00:24:26,067
Mom said the towels
were too thin.
409
00:24:26,100 --> 00:24:27,768
No.
410
00:24:27,802 --> 00:24:29,670
She made me drive her to
Bed Bath & Beyond
411
00:24:29,704 --> 00:24:31,572
- to get a new set.
- No!
412
00:24:31,605 --> 00:24:32,974
- (laughing)
- The worst.
413
00:24:33,007 --> 00:24:34,075
I know.
414
00:24:36,277 --> 00:24:37,945
Do you think if she had us
when she was older,
415
00:24:37,979 --> 00:24:40,247
we'd be less fucked up?
416
00:24:40,281 --> 00:24:43,851
Mm... no.
We'd still be nuts.
417
00:24:43,884 --> 00:24:44,986
You nut.
418
00:24:45,019 --> 00:24:48,189
WOMAN: Yerp, yerp!
419
00:24:48,222 --> 00:24:51,726
We've discussed this
and it's a singular yerp.
420
00:24:51,759 --> 00:24:54,862
It's utter nonsense,
and not a real word.
421
00:24:54,895 --> 00:24:56,897
What are you doing here?
422
00:24:56,931 --> 00:24:58,599
I didn't think you came in
until tomorrow.
423
00:24:58,632 --> 00:25:00,735
- I took a sick day.
- Of course you did.
424
00:25:00,768 --> 00:25:02,136
- Yes.
- Of course you did.
425
00:25:02,169 --> 00:25:04,171
This is... Guys,
this is Roya.
426
00:25:04,205 --> 00:25:05,573
- Hello.
- My friend from work, Roya.
427
00:25:05,606 --> 00:25:07,174
(overlapping dialogue)
428
00:25:07,208 --> 00:25:08,876
- Hi. Nice to meet you, hi.
- These are the fellas.
429
00:25:08,909 --> 00:25:10,911
- Hi. Hi.
- Roya.
430
00:25:10,945 --> 00:25:12,313
Now you get to do
Paul Bunyan Day.
431
00:25:12,346 --> 00:25:15,649
- Yes, Paul Bunyan Day.
- Yes!
432
00:25:15,683 --> 00:25:17,284
Should I know
who that is?
433
00:25:17,318 --> 00:25:18,552
Are you serious?
434
00:25:18,586 --> 00:25:21,322
Very serious, yes.
435
00:25:21,355 --> 00:25:24,125
Oh, well, uh, yeah,
he's... he's like the, uh...
436
00:25:24,158 --> 00:25:27,194
the most important character
in American folklore.
437
00:25:27,228 --> 00:25:28,696
- Really?
- Yeah.
438
00:25:28,729 --> 00:25:31,298
Yeah, he's a 20 foot tall
lumberjack.
439
00:25:31,332 --> 00:25:33,801
And his best friend is
a big blue ox.
440
00:25:33,834 --> 00:25:37,304
- He loved pancakes.
- Well, that doesn't help at all.
441
00:25:37,338 --> 00:25:40,808
All right, and tomorrow is,
uh, his day.
442
00:25:40,841 --> 00:25:45,212
Well, I mean, it's really just
an excuse to play drinking games,
443
00:25:45,246 --> 00:25:47,581
but, yeah.
444
00:25:49,617 --> 00:25:50,985
I stopped taking
birth control.
445
00:25:54,622 --> 00:25:57,224
That's... soon.
446
00:25:57,258 --> 00:25:59,760
I know, but I want to
create life, man.
447
00:25:59,794 --> 00:26:02,063
Can you even imagine?
448
00:26:02,096 --> 00:26:03,964
When Jayson talks about
his son being born,
449
00:26:03,998 --> 00:26:07,268
he's like...
450
00:26:07,301 --> 00:26:09,937
I don't know,
he, like, tears up.
451
00:26:09,970 --> 00:26:11,338
It's the most beautiful thing
I've ever seen
452
00:26:11,372 --> 00:26:13,207
in my entire life.
453
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:15,142
- How old is he?
- Nine.
454
00:26:15,176 --> 00:26:16,877
He's the fuckin' best.
455
00:26:18,345 --> 00:26:20,314
(sighs)
456
00:26:20,347 --> 00:26:22,883
No part of you that thinks
about having kids with Doug?
457
00:26:26,020 --> 00:26:28,222
I don't know, I just...
I got this...
458
00:26:28,255 --> 00:26:32,059
I thought it was, like,
an in the future thing.
459
00:26:32,093 --> 00:26:33,928
I know, but what does he
think about that?
460
00:26:37,431 --> 00:26:40,334
Do you want another drink?
461
00:26:40,367 --> 00:26:42,203
Yes.
462
00:26:42,236 --> 00:26:43,871
Me, too.
463
00:26:46,807 --> 00:26:49,844
♪♪
464
00:28:10,424 --> 00:28:13,294
(phone rings)
465
00:28:13,327 --> 00:28:17,731
- DOUG: (laughing) Oh, man.
- WOMAN: This was Lori at her junior prom.
466
00:28:17,765 --> 00:28:19,833
- Look at that dress.
- Wow.
467
00:28:19,867 --> 00:28:22,836
She insisted on buying one
from a thrift store.
468
00:28:22,870 --> 00:28:26,774
Her mother was
apoplectic.
469
00:28:26,807 --> 00:28:29,376
Ooh, speak of the devil.
470
00:28:29,410 --> 00:28:31,979
- Hey.
- DOUG: Hey.
471
00:28:32,012 --> 00:28:35,182
I was, uh, just telling your
mom that you wanted to sleep in.
472
00:28:36,951 --> 00:28:38,886
Did you have
a lot of drinks last night?
473
00:28:38,919 --> 00:28:40,187
What?
474
00:28:40,221 --> 00:28:41,488
Oh, we were just
telling Doug
475
00:28:41,523 --> 00:28:43,924
about the new house
in Asheville.
476
00:28:43,958 --> 00:28:46,227
You gotta see it, honey,
it's a real beaut.
477
00:28:46,260 --> 00:28:47,194
Four acres.
478
00:28:47,228 --> 00:28:49,029
Oh, if you have time,
479
00:28:49,063 --> 00:28:51,165
we have all these
Southwest points
480
00:28:51,198 --> 00:28:52,933
if you need help
with the flights.
481
00:28:52,967 --> 00:28:54,368
- We don't have that many.
- Oh, shh.
482
00:28:54,401 --> 00:28:56,804
Oh, yeah, um,
483
00:28:56,837 --> 00:28:59,273
Doug's really busy with work
these days, so...
484
00:28:59,940 --> 00:29:02,076
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, super busy.
485
00:29:02,109 --> 00:29:05,547
There's a lot of manuscripts
that need to get edited, so...
486
00:29:05,580 --> 00:29:08,415
Oh, well, he still gets
vacation days, doesn't he?
487
00:29:08,449 --> 00:29:11,919
MAN: And if you come in December,
you get to see all the lights.
488
00:29:11,952 --> 00:29:13,354
Well, I mean, we could, uh...
we could...
489
00:29:13,387 --> 00:29:15,155
we could check our calendars.
490
00:29:16,924 --> 00:29:19,360
Sweetie, can you show me
where the food is?
491
00:29:19,393 --> 00:29:20,461
Now?
492
00:29:23,197 --> 00:29:24,832
(whispering) What are
you doing over there?
493
00:29:24,865 --> 00:29:26,166
Well, I thought
that was the plan,
494
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:28,102
the two of us
still together.
495
00:29:28,135 --> 00:29:29,837
You are literally making
vacation plans
496
00:29:29,870 --> 00:29:31,272
with my grandparents.
497
00:29:31,305 --> 00:29:34,308
I'm just trying to
put on a good show.
498
00:29:34,341 --> 00:29:36,210
This is my life.
499
00:29:36,243 --> 00:29:38,012
These are my people.
500
00:29:38,045 --> 00:29:39,813
You don't have to deal with
them after this weekend,
501
00:29:39,847 --> 00:29:40,914
I do.
502
00:29:44,084 --> 00:29:46,420
You're right.
503
00:29:46,453 --> 00:29:48,355
I'm sorry. Okay?
504
00:29:50,592 --> 00:29:54,194
Maybe we should...
take a little space.
505
00:29:55,863 --> 00:29:57,931
Yeah, maybe.
506
00:29:57,965 --> 00:30:00,568
Avoid other people.
507
00:30:00,602 --> 00:30:01,869
Keep a low profile.
508
00:30:04,238 --> 00:30:06,907
Yeah, I think that
would really help.
509
00:30:10,377 --> 00:30:14,081
Hello, everyone,
and welcome to the first and only...
510
00:30:14,114 --> 00:30:19,320
- BOTH: Paul Bunyan Day!
- (cheering)
511
00:30:19,353 --> 00:30:22,624
- Team Babe!
- (cheering)
512
00:30:22,657 --> 00:30:26,360
- LORI: Team Lumberjack!
- (cheering)
513
00:30:26,393 --> 00:30:28,495
All right, you each have
maps of the campgrounds.
514
00:30:28,530 --> 00:30:31,131
You're supposed to
make your way across camp,
515
00:30:31,165 --> 00:30:33,467
and find the first of
11 golden axes
516
00:30:33,500 --> 00:30:35,603
located next to
the blue star.
517
00:30:35,637 --> 00:30:37,905
As soon as the flare gun
goes off,
518
00:30:37,938 --> 00:30:42,109
each team must consume
two cases of Nati Light.
519
00:30:42,142 --> 00:30:44,411
And make your way down river
to the Ferris wheel.
520
00:30:44,445 --> 00:30:47,481
Whoever gets there first,
and kills the pony keg,
521
00:30:47,515 --> 00:30:50,250
wins the golden axe.
522
00:30:50,284 --> 00:30:52,386
Oh, man,
we gotta kill a pony?
523
00:30:52,419 --> 00:30:55,089
- N...
- Okay, does everyone understand the rules?
524
00:30:55,122 --> 00:30:56,890
- No!
- Okay!
525
00:30:56,924 --> 00:30:58,058
- And we're off!
- (gunshot)
526
00:30:58,092 --> 00:30:59,527
- Let's go!
- (cheering)
527
00:30:59,561 --> 00:31:00,628
Let's go.
528
00:31:02,329 --> 00:31:03,565
(giggling)
529
00:31:03,598 --> 00:31:05,299
You guys,
this is so sweet.
530
00:31:05,332 --> 00:31:07,669
Wait, which team
are you guys on?
531
00:31:07,702 --> 00:31:08,936
Oh, uh, we're...
we're not playing,
532
00:31:08,969 --> 00:31:10,538
we're... we're the refs.
533
00:31:10,572 --> 00:31:12,507
- No.
- Forget that. You guys are playin'.
534
00:31:12,540 --> 00:31:15,209
We can't play and host.
535
00:31:15,242 --> 00:31:17,978
Yeah, I mean, we're the only ones
that know where the golden axes are,
536
00:31:18,011 --> 00:31:20,948
I mean, and somebody's
gotta stay sober.
537
00:31:20,981 --> 00:31:23,183
Sober, schmober, come on,
you have to do it for me.
538
00:31:23,217 --> 00:31:24,686
For her. Look.
539
00:31:24,719 --> 00:31:26,253
(whispers)
My wedding.
540
00:31:26,286 --> 00:31:27,421
- For her.
- Okay.
541
00:31:27,454 --> 00:31:28,956
- I guess.
- Yes! Okay.
542
00:31:28,989 --> 00:31:30,658
Doug's on my team.
Doug's on my team.
543
00:31:30,692 --> 00:31:34,461
Ah, buddy, we're gonna burn
this whole forest down.
544
00:31:34,495 --> 00:31:37,699
Uh, we... No,
we're gonna win together.
545
00:31:37,732 --> 00:31:40,167
- I get stuck with Lori.
- Oh, come on.
546
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,670
I can hold my liquor much
better than Doug over there.
547
00:31:42,704 --> 00:31:44,572
Oh, bullshit, you can.
548
00:31:44,606 --> 00:31:46,940
Says the guy who got drunk
off three kombuchas?
549
00:31:46,974 --> 00:31:49,677
- Ooh...
- Well, at least I didn't get blackout drunk on Jager bombs
550
00:31:49,711 --> 00:31:51,378
and make out with
my anthropology TA.
551
00:31:51,412 --> 00:31:52,647
Ooh...
(laughs)
552
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:54,248
Whoa.
553
00:31:54,281 --> 00:31:56,250
- Oof.
- Beer me!
554
00:31:56,283 --> 00:31:58,218
Whoo!
555
00:31:58,252 --> 00:32:00,287
Oh, yeah.
556
00:32:00,320 --> 00:32:01,955
MAN: Let's go, Lori,
come on, Lori, come on, Lori,
557
00:32:01,989 --> 00:32:03,457
let's go, let's go, let's go.
558
00:32:03,490 --> 00:32:05,159
ALL: (chanting)
Go! Go! Go! Go!
559
00:32:05,192 --> 00:32:06,927
(cheering)
560
00:32:08,195 --> 00:32:09,463
BEA: That's my sister!
561
00:32:11,566 --> 00:32:14,234
- To the boats!
- (cheering)
562
00:32:23,076 --> 00:32:26,980
So, this is
an American wedding.
563
00:32:27,014 --> 00:32:29,283
Uh, yeah, yeah,
pretty much.
564
00:32:29,316 --> 00:32:31,151
The first golden axe is ours!
565
00:32:31,185 --> 00:32:32,319
- Let's go!
- Whoo!
566
00:32:32,352 --> 00:32:34,321
To the Ferris wheel!
567
00:32:34,354 --> 00:32:38,158
♪♪
568
00:32:38,192 --> 00:32:40,027
Oh, no. We lost.
569
00:32:40,060 --> 00:32:42,429
Oh, don't worry, man.
We're gonna catch up later.
570
00:32:42,463 --> 00:32:44,732
Exactly. Everyone,
huddle up.
571
00:32:44,766 --> 00:32:47,034
Come on, bring it in.
572
00:32:47,067 --> 00:32:49,403
Operation Tortoise
is in full effect.
573
00:32:49,436 --> 00:32:51,104
What's Operation Tortoise?
574
00:32:51,138 --> 00:32:52,707
Oh, we tossed
the first challenge.
575
00:32:52,740 --> 00:32:54,576
It's a volume game.
576
00:32:54,609 --> 00:32:57,277
We let 'em get shitcanned,
then we crush 'em later.
577
00:32:57,311 --> 00:32:59,413
Or whatever.
Let's get incredibly stoned.
578
00:32:59,446 --> 00:33:01,381
Mm-hm.
Weed hamantaschen, Doug?
579
00:33:01,415 --> 00:33:04,318
Oh, no, I...
I gotta stay sharp.
580
00:33:04,351 --> 00:33:06,353
All right, bring it in.
Bring it in.
581
00:33:06,386 --> 00:33:08,388
All right,
Team Lumberjack on three.
582
00:33:08,422 --> 00:33:11,325
- One, two, three...
- ALL: Team Lumberjack!
583
00:33:12,560 --> 00:33:15,262
Mm. These Jews are
really on to something.
584
00:33:15,295 --> 00:33:17,464
These are gluten free,
right?
585
00:33:17,498 --> 00:33:20,467
Okay, for our second
golden axe,
586
00:33:20,501 --> 00:33:23,170
- you have to build a...
- Build a machine!
587
00:33:23,203 --> 00:33:26,808
A Rube Goldberg machine
out of which you must
588
00:33:26,841 --> 00:33:29,777
successfully pour
a shot of tequila.
589
00:33:29,811 --> 00:33:30,812
One, two, three, go.
590
00:33:30,845 --> 00:33:32,714
Go. Go.
591
00:33:32,747 --> 00:33:34,816
Wait, what? How?
592
00:33:34,849 --> 00:33:37,150
- Shove it in here.
- This here.
593
00:33:37,184 --> 00:33:39,654
- Okay, shove as many...
- Oh, but this is the same!
594
00:33:39,687 --> 00:33:42,524
Before we rush in,
let's everyone take a minute,
595
00:33:42,557 --> 00:33:45,225
and just regard
the materials.
596
00:33:48,095 --> 00:33:49,564
WOMAN: Figure it out!
597
00:33:49,597 --> 00:33:53,433
Don't rush, we'll see it
when we see it.
598
00:33:53,467 --> 00:33:55,068
Ooh, wait, wait.
599
00:33:55,102 --> 00:33:56,436
- Got it.
- This is too big.
600
00:33:56,470 --> 00:33:58,238
Hold on. No, guys,
this one. Look.
601
00:33:58,272 --> 00:34:00,742
- Yeah.
- Wait. No.
602
00:34:00,775 --> 00:34:02,209
- Do you see it?
- I see it.
603
00:34:02,242 --> 00:34:03,845
I see it, we see it.
Uh, so, Roya, yeah,
604
00:34:03,878 --> 00:34:05,412
I think you know this already,
but start with the 4x4s.
605
00:34:05,445 --> 00:34:07,214
Those are gonna be
the pillars.
606
00:34:07,247 --> 00:34:09,082
Uh, Dominic,
I want you to take the PVC piping
607
00:34:09,116 --> 00:34:10,518
and turn it into
a bit of a slalom.
608
00:34:10,552 --> 00:34:13,353
Here. How about that?
Does that thing fit?
609
00:34:13,387 --> 00:34:17,090
Uh, Jayson, I want you to start
on the smaller piece of wood,
610
00:34:17,124 --> 00:34:18,458
make a groove.
611
00:34:18,492 --> 00:34:21,361
(indistinct dialogue)
612
00:34:21,395 --> 00:34:23,531
- Yes! Yes!
- Yeah!
613
00:34:23,565 --> 00:34:25,465
(chuckles)
Oh, man.
614
00:34:25,499 --> 00:34:26,601
Done.
615
00:34:26,634 --> 00:34:29,102
- (pipes clattering)
- No!
616
00:34:29,136 --> 00:34:30,738
Goddammit!
617
00:34:32,406 --> 00:34:33,608
Would you do the honors?
618
00:34:53,293 --> 00:34:56,463
- (applause)
- And we are tied
619
00:34:56,496 --> 00:34:59,634
with nine games to go.
620
00:34:59,667 --> 00:35:02,369
Wait. Nine?
621
00:35:02,402 --> 00:35:05,405
Camp Arrowhead!
622
00:35:05,439 --> 00:35:07,374
Ka-kaw.
623
00:35:07,407 --> 00:35:10,444
Oh, come on, people.
624
00:35:10,477 --> 00:35:15,248
I said, Camp Arrowhead!
625
00:35:15,282 --> 00:35:18,653
ALL: Ka-kaw!
626
00:35:18,686 --> 00:35:22,690
Hey, it looks like somebody
needs a little water.
627
00:35:22,724 --> 00:35:23,925
Ka-kaw!
628
00:35:23,958 --> 00:35:25,560
That's a...
That's a fair point,
629
00:35:25,593 --> 00:35:28,428
but I still think that
you ought to pace yourself.
630
00:35:28,462 --> 00:35:30,364
Why, 'cause you're afraid
I'm gonna...
631
00:35:30,397 --> 00:35:31,899
- kick your ass?
- Okay, no.
632
00:35:31,933 --> 00:35:33,400
You sure?
633
00:35:33,433 --> 00:35:34,769
'Cause I think
you're afraid.
634
00:35:34,802 --> 00:35:38,271
That I'ma whup your ass
and feed...
635
00:35:38,305 --> 00:35:40,240
your carcass to the wolves.
636
00:35:40,273 --> 00:35:41,909
What... What wolves?
637
00:35:41,943 --> 00:35:44,812
Would you...
Give it a rest!
638
00:35:44,846 --> 00:35:45,913
Okay?
639
00:35:47,682 --> 00:35:50,283
Give me
the fuckin' bottle.
640
00:35:50,317 --> 00:35:53,353
♪♪
641
00:35:57,692 --> 00:35:59,192
(grunting)
642
00:36:08,670 --> 00:36:09,871
(grunting)
643
00:36:10,938 --> 00:36:13,173
(cheering)
644
00:36:14,575 --> 00:36:17,578
♪♪
645
00:36:21,481 --> 00:36:22,750
What's up!
646
00:36:22,784 --> 00:36:25,787
♪♪
647
00:36:28,589 --> 00:36:29,691
Yes!
648
00:36:30,892 --> 00:36:33,293
(cheering)
649
00:36:33,326 --> 00:36:35,863
(screaming)
650
00:36:35,897 --> 00:36:38,398
♪♪
651
00:36:38,432 --> 00:36:39,634
(shouting)
652
00:36:43,037 --> 00:36:44,739
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
653
00:36:44,772 --> 00:36:48,576
ALL: Red Rover, Red Rover,
send Beatrice over!
654
00:36:48,609 --> 00:36:51,646
♪♪
655
00:36:54,381 --> 00:36:55,883
(screaming)
656
00:36:55,917 --> 00:36:59,554
ALL: Red Rover, Red Rover,
let Jayson come over!
657
00:37:00,555 --> 00:37:01,789
All right,
all right.
658
00:37:06,928 --> 00:37:09,396
- (gasping)
- Oh, goddamn!
659
00:37:09,429 --> 00:37:10,531
(grunts)
660
00:37:12,567 --> 00:37:14,535
(shouting)
661
00:37:14,569 --> 00:37:16,738
Whoo!
Yeah! Yeah!
662
00:37:16,771 --> 00:37:20,307
Well, dang, um,
can't believe this,
663
00:37:20,340 --> 00:37:21,642
but we are out of challenges,
664
00:37:21,676 --> 00:37:23,410
and I don't think we can
declare a winner.
665
00:37:23,443 --> 00:37:25,278
BEA: What?
Wait, wait, wait...
666
00:37:25,312 --> 00:37:28,281
Well, I mean, look,
each team has five axes,
667
00:37:28,315 --> 00:37:29,382
and after
the dizzy bat debacle...
668
00:37:29,416 --> 00:37:30,450
I'm sorry, Allison.
669
00:37:30,484 --> 00:37:32,486
What happened to Allison?
670
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:34,555
So, what are we gonna do
for a tie-breaker?
671
00:37:35,690 --> 00:37:37,491
We don't have
a tie-breaker.
672
00:37:37,525 --> 00:37:39,326
Well, you better
come up with one,
673
00:37:39,359 --> 00:37:40,494
or I will.
674
00:37:42,897 --> 00:37:45,465
Yeah, I'd just like to say
that I strongly object to this.
675
00:37:45,499 --> 00:37:47,400
- This is your fault.
- How is this our fault?
676
00:37:47,434 --> 00:37:48,770
First one to hit
the water loses,
677
00:37:48,803 --> 00:37:50,437
winner takes the Bunyan.
678
00:37:50,470 --> 00:37:53,406
JAYSON: Get her.
Get her!
679
00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:54,942
Stop pitty-patting
up there.
680
00:37:54,976 --> 00:37:56,511
Come on, you gotta try
harder than that.
681
00:37:56,544 --> 00:37:58,445
No, I'm not gonna
just hit her.
682
00:37:58,478 --> 00:38:00,815
- I give you permission to hit her.
- Thanks, Bea.
683
00:38:00,848 --> 00:38:02,884
Yeah, don't take it easy on
her just 'cause you love her.
684
00:38:02,917 --> 00:38:04,719
Pretend you guys
are strangers.
685
00:38:04,752 --> 00:38:06,721
Yeah, pretend you
fuckin' hate each other.
686
00:38:06,754 --> 00:38:08,689
- Fuck him up!
- Seriously?
687
00:38:08,723 --> 00:38:10,758
(screaming)
688
00:38:10,792 --> 00:38:12,827
(cheering)
689
00:38:15,663 --> 00:38:16,864
Babe Team wins!
690
00:38:16,898 --> 00:38:18,666
(cheering)
691
00:38:21,969 --> 00:38:23,905
You really let me down
up there, man.
692
00:38:25,773 --> 00:38:27,508
Yeah, I'm over it.
Give me a kiss.
693
00:38:27,542 --> 00:38:28,709
- Mwah!
- Okay.
694
00:38:28,743 --> 00:38:29,811
All right.
695
00:38:31,612 --> 00:38:33,648
(cheering)
696
00:38:42,156 --> 00:38:44,391
(screaming)
697
00:38:50,765 --> 00:38:52,399
I know it's not
a trophy.
698
00:38:52,432 --> 00:38:54,334
Oh, hell, yeah.
699
00:38:56,637 --> 00:38:59,006
BEA: But just let me hold...
let me hold the Bunyan.
700
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:00,775
- No, he's mine.
- Come on. Come on.
701
00:39:04,579 --> 00:39:05,913
Oh, look.
702
00:39:05,947 --> 00:39:08,583
- (quacking)
- It's the waterfall.
703
00:39:08,616 --> 00:39:11,986
(laughs)
Oh, shit.
704
00:39:12,019 --> 00:39:16,691
Oh, Wendy Chen got caught making
out with a CIT there. Remember?
705
00:39:16,724 --> 00:39:19,861
Uh, she... No, she got
kicked out of camp, didn't she?
706
00:39:19,894 --> 00:39:23,531
Yeah. I heard she died.
707
00:39:23,564 --> 00:39:24,932
Really?
708
00:39:24,966 --> 00:39:27,400
I don't know. Maybe.
709
00:39:27,434 --> 00:39:28,836
We all do, eventually.
710
00:39:31,205 --> 00:39:33,440
Well, Wendy was a dumb-dumb.
711
00:39:33,473 --> 00:39:35,509
(chuckles)
Everyone knows,
712
00:39:35,543 --> 00:39:37,477
if you want to fool around,
you go to the tree house.
713
00:39:37,511 --> 00:39:39,412
Go to the tree house!
714
00:39:39,446 --> 00:39:41,515
Whenever you're sad
and missing home...
715
00:39:41,549 --> 00:39:44,118
...go to the tree house,
you won't be alone.
716
00:39:47,622 --> 00:39:50,024
So, where do you live
in San Francisco?
717
00:39:50,057 --> 00:39:52,693
- Do you know the city?
- Nope.
718
00:39:52,727 --> 00:39:55,495
All right, um, well,
719
00:39:55,529 --> 00:39:58,566
I just bought a little house
in Rockridge.
720
00:39:58,599 --> 00:40:00,902
Describe it to me.
721
00:40:00,935 --> 00:40:03,604
It's blue.
722
00:40:03,638 --> 00:40:07,508
Um... there's
an herb garden out back.
723
00:40:07,541 --> 00:40:11,478
Nothing's grown yet,
but... fingers crossed.
724
00:40:13,047 --> 00:40:15,950
I don't know.
It's a house.
725
00:40:15,983 --> 00:40:17,685
And it's mine.
726
00:40:17,718 --> 00:40:19,987
And I love it.
727
00:40:20,021 --> 00:40:23,157
That sounds...
728
00:40:23,190 --> 00:40:24,992
amazing.
729
00:40:25,026 --> 00:40:27,895
Like...
Like really amazing.
730
00:40:27,929 --> 00:40:29,764
I want that.
731
00:40:29,797 --> 00:40:32,667
Would you like to pay
my mortgage, also?
732
00:40:33,801 --> 00:40:35,468
- Okay.
- Yeah?
733
00:40:35,503 --> 00:40:36,570
Yeah.
734
00:40:40,841 --> 00:40:42,543
I don't have no money
right now...
735
00:40:42,576 --> 00:40:43,878
- Oh.
- But I'm... But I'm good for it,
736
00:40:43,911 --> 00:40:45,713
I'm good for it.
Wait. Look.
737
00:40:47,815 --> 00:40:52,987
Here. I... O... U.
738
00:40:57,258 --> 00:40:58,859
I hope I can cash this.
739
00:40:58,893 --> 00:41:00,493
(chuckles)
740
00:41:03,164 --> 00:41:05,099
I'm starving.
741
00:41:05,132 --> 00:41:06,901
Is there any food
in this place?
742
00:41:06,934 --> 00:41:10,671
Baby, we've literally
only eaten here.
743
00:41:10,705 --> 00:41:12,907
By the way, I was supposed to
split a sundae with Doug.
744
00:41:12,940 --> 00:41:14,008
Where is he?
745
00:41:31,892 --> 00:41:33,828
Water's getting
a little cold.
746
00:41:36,964 --> 00:41:40,134
We could go get in
the Jacuzzi.
747
00:41:42,203 --> 00:41:43,504
No.
748
00:41:44,638 --> 00:41:46,273
I mean, we could
just head back.
749
00:41:49,810 --> 00:41:52,179
I don't want to
head back.
750
00:41:52,213 --> 00:41:53,714
- No?
- Mm-mm.
751
00:41:55,816 --> 00:41:56,951
Neither do I.
752
00:42:23,778 --> 00:42:26,047
Mm, mm, mm, mm.
753
00:42:26,080 --> 00:42:27,715
You want a bite of this,
don't you?
754
00:42:27,748 --> 00:42:29,617
- But just, like, a little bit.
- A little bit?
755
00:42:29,650 --> 00:42:31,152
- Mm-hm.
- Okay, how about this bite? I did it.
756
00:42:31,185 --> 00:42:34,255
- More than that.
- Perfectly. More than that?
757
00:42:34,288 --> 00:42:36,824
Okay, here's
a little bit more.
758
00:42:36,857 --> 00:42:38,159
- Okay, ready?
- Mm-hm.
759
00:42:38,192 --> 00:42:39,860
(laughs)
760
00:42:41,228 --> 00:42:42,596
I know.
761
00:42:42,630 --> 00:42:43,831
I did that just for you.
762
00:42:46,167 --> 00:42:48,736
I did that just for you.
763
00:42:48,769 --> 00:42:50,204
- BEA: That's so good.
- JAYSON: right?
764
00:42:53,874 --> 00:42:55,209
(laughing)
765
00:42:55,242 --> 00:42:57,044
- You guys want a bite?
- Absolutely not.
766
00:42:57,078 --> 00:42:58,245
- I'm thinkin' I'm good.
- No, I'm good.
767
00:43:00,014 --> 00:43:01,282
Hi. Can I get
a shot of whiskey, please?
768
00:43:01,315 --> 00:43:03,050
Uh, we have
a cocktail menu.
769
00:43:03,084 --> 00:43:05,953
Oh, great. Can I get
a shot of whiskey, please?
770
00:43:05,986 --> 00:43:07,054
Sure.
771
00:43:13,227 --> 00:43:14,862
- Thank you.
- Mm-hm.
772
00:43:19,667 --> 00:43:21,202
Lori Anderson.
773
00:43:22,803 --> 00:43:24,638
Hey.
774
00:43:24,672 --> 00:43:27,641
Uh, so some of us
were gonna go into town.
775
00:43:27,675 --> 00:43:29,310
Oh, what's in town?
776
00:43:29,343 --> 00:43:31,846
Uh, just
a miniature horse farm.
777
00:43:33,214 --> 00:43:34,982
Isn't it dark out?
778
00:43:35,015 --> 00:43:36,684
Yeah.
779
00:43:36,717 --> 00:43:38,419
We'll probably just
go to some bars, then.
780
00:43:38,452 --> 00:43:40,354
Yeah, or you...
I don't know,
781
00:43:40,387 --> 00:43:42,223
we could just stay here.
782
00:43:42,256 --> 00:43:46,227
Uh, yeah. I can go see if
the guys want to...
783
00:43:46,260 --> 00:43:48,262
Or, you know,
just you and me.
784
00:43:51,966 --> 00:43:53,901
Okay.
785
00:43:53,934 --> 00:43:55,369
Okay.
786
00:43:55,402 --> 00:43:58,639
♪♪
787
00:44:04,712 --> 00:44:07,715
So, uh, I...
788
00:44:07,748 --> 00:44:10,184
I should probably
get to bed.
789
00:44:13,220 --> 00:44:14,421
Goodnight.
790
00:44:16,123 --> 00:44:17,224
'Night.
791
00:44:18,459 --> 00:44:22,229
(door opens, closes)
792
00:44:22,263 --> 00:44:24,198
- (laughing)
- Oh...
793
00:44:24,231 --> 00:44:27,935
BOTH: Oh, no...
794
00:44:27,968 --> 00:44:31,205
- (groans)
- Oh, no, this is no fun.
795
00:44:31,238 --> 00:44:32,673
Sad face.
796
00:44:35,943 --> 00:44:37,711
Let's play.
797
00:44:37,745 --> 00:44:40,247
Seriously?
Spin the bottle?
798
00:44:40,281 --> 00:44:41,749
- Yeah, come on.
- Oh, God.
799
00:44:41,782 --> 00:44:43,217
It's camp tradition.
800
00:44:43,250 --> 00:44:44,485
You gonna go against
tradition?
801
00:44:44,519 --> 00:44:45,719
Yeah, whatever.
802
00:44:45,753 --> 00:44:47,388
Okay.
803
00:44:47,421 --> 00:44:49,023
(flask rattles)
804
00:44:49,056 --> 00:44:50,457
- (laughs)
- Lame.
805
00:44:50,491 --> 00:44:52,960
All right, you go.
806
00:44:52,993 --> 00:44:54,728
- I also suck at this.
- Do it again.
807
00:44:54,762 --> 00:44:55,763
(flask rattles)
808
00:44:55,796 --> 00:44:56,864
Oh!
809
00:45:04,805 --> 00:45:06,974
Oh, no.
810
00:45:07,007 --> 00:45:08,842
Really?
811
00:45:08,876 --> 00:45:11,245
Okay.
812
00:45:11,278 --> 00:45:12,413
(flask rattles)
813
00:45:14,915 --> 00:45:16,450
(muttering)
814
00:45:23,857 --> 00:45:26,827
Oh...
815
00:45:26,860 --> 00:45:28,996
- Wait.
- I don't think I can...
816
00:45:29,029 --> 00:45:30,264
- What are you doing?
- Do this.
817
00:45:30,297 --> 00:45:32,399
Mm-mm.
This is not right.
818
00:45:32,433 --> 00:45:33,934
Wait,
where are you going?
819
00:45:33,968 --> 00:45:35,502
I just gonna take
a little walk.
820
00:45:35,537 --> 00:45:37,037
- Where...
- I gotta go.
821
00:45:37,071 --> 00:45:39,940
Wait, Lor... Lor...
Come on, Lori.
822
00:45:39,974 --> 00:45:43,177
♪♪
823
00:45:43,210 --> 00:45:44,512
(grunts)
824
00:45:57,024 --> 00:45:58,225
(door opens)
825
00:46:06,033 --> 00:46:07,268
Hey, what...
826
00:46:09,604 --> 00:46:12,006
Are you bleeding?
827
00:46:12,039 --> 00:46:13,107
I saw you.
828
00:46:15,909 --> 00:46:18,279
On the bridge,
I saw you.
829
00:46:18,312 --> 00:46:20,281
What...
What did you see?
830
00:46:22,517 --> 00:46:24,351
She had her hand on
your arm.
831
00:46:26,487 --> 00:46:27,555
I saw.
832
00:46:31,325 --> 00:46:32,960
Okay, just, um...
833
00:46:32,993 --> 00:46:34,562
- You fuck her?
- What?
834
00:46:37,498 --> 00:46:39,366
No.
835
00:46:39,400 --> 00:46:41,001
So nothing happened.
836
00:46:48,976 --> 00:46:50,144
We, um...
837
00:46:56,383 --> 00:46:59,219
We... We fooled around
a little bit.
838
00:47:02,456 --> 00:47:04,892
And... I don't know
what you want from me.
839
00:47:08,495 --> 00:47:10,230
That...
840
00:47:10,264 --> 00:47:11,865
That is so mean.
841
00:47:14,602 --> 00:47:16,003
It's just so mean.
842
00:47:17,505 --> 00:47:18,939
I'm sorry.
843
00:47:23,077 --> 00:47:25,245
I... I am... I am...
844
00:47:25,279 --> 00:47:27,948
I am so fucking sorry.
845
00:47:30,585 --> 00:47:32,186
I'm so sorry.
846
00:47:36,990 --> 00:47:38,225
(sighs)
847
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:41,295
(sniffles)
848
00:47:43,397 --> 00:47:46,433
♪♪
849
00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:07,522
(door closes)
850
00:48:10,525 --> 00:48:12,326
What was that?
851
00:48:12,359 --> 00:48:13,460
Nothing.
852
00:48:13,494 --> 00:48:15,597
♪♪
853
00:48:15,630 --> 00:48:18,566
I said marry me, and...
and you threw up.
854
00:48:18,600 --> 00:48:20,100
That didn't seem like
nothing.
855
00:48:20,134 --> 00:48:21,435
Can we please just
go home, Doug?
856
00:48:21,468 --> 00:48:22,570
I don't feel good.
857
00:48:26,006 --> 00:48:27,542
Fuck off.
858
00:48:27,575 --> 00:48:30,077
Goddammit, do you...
do you hate the idea that much?
859
00:48:30,110 --> 00:48:31,646
LORI: No, I never said that!
860
00:48:31,679 --> 00:48:35,182
DOUG: Okay, so Lori Anderson,
will you marry me?
861
00:48:37,317 --> 00:48:40,421
Wow. Okay, uh, yeah,
fuck this, I'm done.
862
00:48:44,491 --> 00:48:46,528
- LORI: With us?
- Yeah.
863
00:48:48,128 --> 00:48:51,131
♪♪
864
00:48:55,603 --> 00:48:57,971
LORI: Doug.
865
00:48:58,005 --> 00:49:00,307
Yeah?
866
00:49:00,340 --> 00:49:01,509
Ask me again.
867
00:49:05,412 --> 00:49:07,448
(squealing)
You're engaged!
868
00:49:07,481 --> 00:49:09,082
Why didn't you tell me?
869
00:49:09,116 --> 00:49:10,652
Oh, well, you know,
we didn't want to
870
00:49:10,685 --> 00:49:12,386
steal your thunder
over the weekend.
871
00:49:12,419 --> 00:49:14,221
You know, I knew it.
872
00:49:14,254 --> 00:49:16,056
I... I knew something weird
was going on with you guys.
873
00:49:16,089 --> 00:49:19,426
Yeah, she was like, "Hey,
something's going on with them."
874
00:49:19,460 --> 00:49:21,295
Uh, well, we wanted to
keep it a secret,
875
00:49:21,328 --> 00:49:23,665
but, yeah,
we're gettin' married.
876
00:49:23,698 --> 00:49:25,633
- (squealing)
- (laughing)
877
00:49:25,667 --> 00:49:29,336
What is wrong?
What is happening?
878
00:49:29,369 --> 00:49:32,072
These two idiots
are engaged.
879
00:49:32,105 --> 00:49:34,374
Really? Oh, my God!
880
00:49:34,408 --> 00:49:35,643
- Ow.
- Oh, my God.
881
00:49:35,677 --> 00:49:37,645
- Hey.
- Oh, honey.
882
00:49:37,679 --> 00:49:41,516
You have no idea how long I
have waited to hear this news.
883
00:49:41,549 --> 00:49:46,153
- Jojo, Lydia...
- No. Hey. Look at me.
884
00:49:46,186 --> 00:49:48,388
This weekend is not
really about us, right?
885
00:49:48,422 --> 00:49:51,325
So we just want to keep it
private for a little bit. Okay?
886
00:49:55,128 --> 00:49:56,664
(sniffles)
887
00:49:56,698 --> 00:49:58,131
My lips are sealed.
888
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:01,636
Okay?
889
00:50:03,270 --> 00:50:05,773
You guys have made me
so happy.
890
00:50:05,807 --> 00:50:07,107
Okay.
891
00:50:10,110 --> 00:50:12,346
You make a nice groom.
892
00:50:12,379 --> 00:50:16,784
Oh, well, uh...
King of the Ushers, actually.
893
00:50:16,818 --> 00:50:18,520
It's not
a real position.
894
00:50:24,592 --> 00:50:27,361
Doug, help me pick
a yarmulke.
895
00:50:27,394 --> 00:50:31,098
White. Blue.
896
00:50:31,131 --> 00:50:33,500
White with blue.
897
00:50:33,535 --> 00:50:35,637
Bedazzled.
898
00:50:35,670 --> 00:50:38,506
Well, I mean,
they all look pretty nice.
899
00:50:38,540 --> 00:50:40,307
Let me show you again.
900
00:50:40,340 --> 00:50:42,142
- White.
- Mm-hm.
901
00:50:42,175 --> 00:50:46,113
Blue.
White with blue.
902
00:50:46,146 --> 00:50:47,281
Bedazzled.
903
00:50:50,317 --> 00:50:51,318
- Okay, all right.
- Uh...
904
00:50:51,351 --> 00:50:52,754
Other order.
905
00:50:52,787 --> 00:50:54,556
(gasps)
906
00:50:54,589 --> 00:50:58,358
Maybe we can
alter my wedding dress.
907
00:50:58,392 --> 00:51:00,260
Oh, it's a traditional
silhouette.
908
00:51:00,294 --> 00:51:01,863
Right.
Not really your thing.
909
00:51:01,896 --> 00:51:03,463
Please wear Mom's
wedding dress.
910
00:51:03,497 --> 00:51:06,099
Oh, no, wait, stop.
That's the haunted one.
911
00:51:07,802 --> 00:51:10,404
Did your father
at least RSVP?
912
00:51:10,437 --> 00:51:13,340
Yes. He called to say
congratulations.
913
00:51:13,373 --> 00:51:15,242
He says he wishes
he could be here.
914
00:51:15,275 --> 00:51:17,311
And he said he'd buy the most
expensive thing on the registry,
915
00:51:17,344 --> 00:51:18,813
so here's hoping for
a jet ski.
916
00:51:18,846 --> 00:51:20,882
Could I at least tell
Grandma and Grandpa?
917
00:51:20,915 --> 00:51:22,584
About the jet ski?
918
00:51:22,617 --> 00:51:24,484
Yeah, you think they'd be
down for a trip?
919
00:51:24,519 --> 00:51:26,353
- Mm-hm.
- Uh, no, Mom,
920
00:51:26,386 --> 00:51:27,689
I told you,
not until after the wedding.
921
00:51:27,722 --> 00:51:30,123
Let me just text
my book club.
922
00:51:30,157 --> 00:51:31,559
They'll be so excited.
923
00:51:31,593 --> 00:51:33,393
Did you text your book club
when I got engaged?
924
00:51:33,427 --> 00:51:37,765
It's just that Doug is...
is like part of the family.
925
00:51:37,799 --> 00:51:40,233
It's different.
926
00:51:40,267 --> 00:51:42,570
Where is that lady?
I'm supposed to start my "shitsu."
927
00:51:42,604 --> 00:51:43,871
(snicckers)
928
00:51:43,905 --> 00:51:46,741
Mom, you mean shia...
929
00:51:46,774 --> 00:51:48,910
- Nope. "Shitsu."
- Yep.
930
00:51:48,943 --> 00:51:50,143
Yep.
931
00:51:50,177 --> 00:51:52,680
Hey, Doug.
932
00:51:52,714 --> 00:51:54,414
(chuckles)
933
00:51:54,448 --> 00:51:55,650
I'm stupid.
934
00:51:55,683 --> 00:51:57,184
No, no, it was...
it was very nice.
935
00:51:57,217 --> 00:51:59,252
Thank you. Thank you.
(chuckles)
936
00:51:59,286 --> 00:52:02,557
So, uh, when are you guys
thinkin'?
937
00:52:02,590 --> 00:52:04,257
Of... Of gettin' married,
when are you guys thinkin'?
938
00:52:04,291 --> 00:52:05,860
Oh, oh, yeah.
939
00:52:05,893 --> 00:52:07,729
Oh, man, we...
we hadn't really thought about it yet.
940
00:52:07,762 --> 00:52:10,364
We're thinkin' maybe...
941
00:52:10,397 --> 00:52:12,700
uh... next June?
942
00:52:12,734 --> 00:52:14,569
June sucks, Doug.
943
00:52:14,602 --> 00:52:16,403
Ah, just... just
figure it out ASAP.
944
00:52:16,436 --> 00:52:18,405
You know, my ex and I were
engaged for three years
945
00:52:18,438 --> 00:52:19,941
before we set a date,
and...
946
00:52:19,974 --> 00:52:21,576
probably wasn't a good sign.
947
00:52:23,377 --> 00:52:26,380
But you and Lori,
you guys are totally different.
948
00:52:26,413 --> 00:52:27,782
You guys are in it
for the long haul.
949
00:52:27,815 --> 00:52:29,182
Yeah.
950
00:52:32,419 --> 00:52:34,689
We broke up on Wednesday,
actually.
951
00:52:34,722 --> 00:52:36,456
(chuckles)
952
00:52:37,859 --> 00:52:40,293
Oh...
953
00:52:40,327 --> 00:52:43,463
Uh, I'm sorry,
but... but...
954
00:52:43,497 --> 00:52:46,366
So when did you
get engaged?
955
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:47,702
Uh, last night.
956
00:52:49,436 --> 00:52:54,207
Oh... Uh... so that first day
in the lobby,
957
00:52:54,241 --> 00:52:55,943
and then Paul Bunyan Day,
you guys were...
958
00:52:55,977 --> 00:52:58,813
Yeah, we were pretending
to still be together.
959
00:52:58,846 --> 00:53:00,948
- Oh!
- You know, for Bea.
960
00:53:00,982 --> 00:53:02,817
Yeah, yeah.
I'm just...
961
00:53:02,850 --> 00:53:04,819
I'm so sorry you guys,
you know, broke up.
962
00:53:04,852 --> 00:53:06,219
Oh, no, but we're fine.
963
00:53:06,253 --> 00:53:07,755
- Now.
- Oh, yeah, obviously now.
964
00:53:07,789 --> 00:53:10,390
You know, I mean,
I totally get why you guys
965
00:53:10,424 --> 00:53:13,460
would pretend and then
not pretend with the...
966
00:53:13,493 --> 00:53:15,495
the, uh, you know,
with the engagement thing.
967
00:53:15,530 --> 00:53:16,798
- Yeah.
- Awesome.
968
00:53:16,831 --> 00:53:18,666
Yeah.
Thanks again for these.
969
00:53:18,700 --> 00:53:19,901
Yeah, yeah.
970
00:53:25,840 --> 00:53:28,843
♪♪
971
00:53:31,512 --> 00:53:33,648
Very handsome.
972
00:53:33,681 --> 00:53:34,749
Thank you.
973
00:53:37,652 --> 00:53:38,720
Can I...
974
00:53:57,705 --> 00:53:58,806
Perfect.
975
00:54:01,843 --> 00:54:04,912
GRANDPA: So, where's
the honeymoon, Hawaii? Paris?
976
00:54:04,946 --> 00:54:07,414
- Oh, no, no, uh, Niagara Falls.
- (all exclaiming)
977
00:54:07,447 --> 00:54:09,650
It's... It's where my folks
went on their honeymoon.
978
00:54:09,684 --> 00:54:11,519
BEA: Yeah, we really
wanted to honor them.
979
00:54:11,552 --> 00:54:13,755
And then you'll
move in together?
980
00:54:13,788 --> 00:54:15,990
No, we already live together.
Jayson has a place in the Mission.
981
00:54:16,023 --> 00:54:18,492
Yeah, and, uh,
we're looking for something bigger,
982
00:54:18,526 --> 00:54:21,629
though, with a backyard
and a studio for Bea.
983
00:54:22,730 --> 00:54:24,899
For her scrunchies.
984
00:54:24,932 --> 00:54:26,834
- Yep.
- Uh-huh.
985
00:54:26,868 --> 00:54:29,302
Oh, I love mine, dear.
986
00:54:30,772 --> 00:54:32,707
You should have made
one of these for me, honey,
987
00:54:32,740 --> 00:54:33,975
I can be a bad bitch.
988
00:54:34,008 --> 00:54:35,308
(laughter)
989
00:54:35,342 --> 00:54:36,811
Next time, Pop-Pop.
990
00:54:36,844 --> 00:54:39,547
I'll hold you to that.
991
00:54:39,580 --> 00:54:41,783
Uh, you know, Lori and I were
thinking about getting a house.
992
00:54:41,816 --> 00:54:43,584
(scoffs)
We were?
993
00:54:43,618 --> 00:54:45,452
Oh, that's... it's...
994
00:54:45,485 --> 00:54:46,687
You know, I actually know
a great real estate agent.
995
00:54:46,721 --> 00:54:48,689
- Oh, my God.
- In Portland.
996
00:54:48,723 --> 00:54:50,357
- BEA: Yeah.
- You guys should look in that neighborhood
997
00:54:50,390 --> 00:54:53,528
that you showed me with
all the Craftsman houses.
998
00:54:53,561 --> 00:54:56,564
Oh, I like our apartment.
999
00:54:56,597 --> 00:55:00,101
Oh, I mean, sure, but, I mean,
if you want to build up...
1000
00:55:00,134 --> 00:55:02,402
- you know, equity, you should...
- Yeah, but, you know,
1001
00:55:02,435 --> 00:55:06,707
our rent is cheap, and, uh,
it's close to my work.
1002
00:55:06,741 --> 00:55:08,910
Right, I mean, but you're also
not gonna work there forever.
1003
00:55:08,943 --> 00:55:11,444
- I might.
- So...
1004
00:55:11,478 --> 00:55:12,814
Okay.
1005
00:55:13,581 --> 00:55:14,649
Cool.
1006
00:55:20,588 --> 00:55:23,624
♪♪
1007
00:55:40,074 --> 00:55:41,742
MOTHER: I'm just worried
1008
00:55:41,776 --> 00:55:43,678
you're gonna make
the same mistake I did.
1009
00:55:43,711 --> 00:55:45,445
BEA: Oh,
so we were mistakes?
1010
00:55:45,478 --> 00:55:48,115
No. I married a man
I didn't love.
1011
00:55:48,149 --> 00:55:49,482
But I love Jayson.
1012
00:55:49,517 --> 00:55:51,619
I'm marrying
my soul mate.
1013
00:55:51,652 --> 00:55:53,453
Why can't you be
happy for me?
1014
00:55:53,486 --> 00:55:56,691
- Hey.
- Lori, please tell your sister I'm just...
1015
00:55:56,724 --> 00:55:58,125
We're worried about her.
1016
00:55:58,159 --> 00:56:00,695
Oh, Lori, please tell Mom
she's being a bitch.
1017
00:56:01,863 --> 00:56:03,998
Okay, I tried.
Really, I tried.
1018
00:56:04,031 --> 00:56:05,566
Great. Try harder.
1019
00:56:07,869 --> 00:56:10,972
Seriously. She thinks
I am some, like, idiot baby
1020
00:56:11,005 --> 00:56:12,773
who can't
take care of herself.
1021
00:56:12,807 --> 00:56:15,109
We just think that
you're a little impulsive.
1022
00:56:17,078 --> 00:56:20,615
I mean, you know,
you're Bea, you're fun.
1023
00:56:20,648 --> 00:56:22,984
You don't think about
consequences, you...
1024
00:56:23,017 --> 00:56:24,919
you dropped out of college
to go surfing.
1025
00:56:24,952 --> 00:56:27,788
I get engaged to a man
I've known for four weeks.
1026
00:56:27,822 --> 00:56:30,024
Yes, exactly.
That...
1027
00:56:30,825 --> 00:56:32,827
Hey, baby.
Your Mom's in there cryin'
1028
00:56:32,860 --> 00:56:34,762
and snarfin' down
a whole pie.
1029
00:56:37,031 --> 00:56:39,700
(clears throat) What's goin...
What's goin' on?
1030
00:56:41,035 --> 00:56:42,770
Well, Lori doesn't think
I should marry you.
1031
00:56:42,803 --> 00:56:44,939
I did not say that.
1032
00:56:44,972 --> 00:56:46,741
God, you may as well have.
1033
00:56:46,774 --> 00:56:47,909
I don't think I'd be taking
relationship advice
1034
00:56:47,942 --> 00:56:49,577
from your sister.
1035
00:56:49,610 --> 00:56:51,746
I'm sorry. What's that
supposed to mean?
1036
00:56:51,779 --> 00:56:52,880
Jayson,
now is not the time.
1037
00:56:52,914 --> 00:56:54,215
Wait, what?
1038
00:56:54,248 --> 00:56:55,650
(sighs)
1039
00:56:58,519 --> 00:56:59,787
Honey, they...
1040
00:56:59,820 --> 00:57:01,856
they broke up
three days ago.
1041
00:57:06,794 --> 00:57:07,895
That true?
1042
00:57:11,498 --> 00:57:15,636
That is... Yes,
that's... that's true.
1043
00:57:15,670 --> 00:57:17,838
(sighs)
I'm sorry, we just...
1044
00:57:17,872 --> 00:57:19,240
we thought it'd be
too hard to tell you,
1045
00:57:19,273 --> 00:57:21,075
and then I thought
maybe it was better
1046
00:57:21,108 --> 00:57:22,643
we just pretend
for the weekend.
1047
00:57:22,677 --> 00:57:26,013
Oh, my G... So...
1048
00:57:26,047 --> 00:57:27,581
are you getting married
or are you breaking up?
1049
00:57:27,615 --> 00:57:29,717
No, no, no,
we're getting married.
1050
00:57:29,750 --> 00:57:31,652
We... We worked
everything out.
1051
00:57:35,056 --> 00:57:36,123
Doug...
1052
00:57:39,560 --> 00:57:41,929
- We're fine.
- They're fine.
1053
00:57:41,963 --> 00:57:45,633
- They're fine.
- I can't believe this.
1054
00:57:45,666 --> 00:57:46,968
- Oh, my God.
- Honey...
1055
00:57:49,804 --> 00:57:50,871
Bea...
1056
00:58:27,675 --> 00:58:28,876
(clatters)
1057
00:58:31,946 --> 00:58:33,180
Lori...
1058
00:58:37,318 --> 00:58:39,887
Why didn't you answer me?
1059
00:58:39,920 --> 00:58:42,223
What?
1060
00:58:42,256 --> 00:58:44,825
When I asked you to marry me.
1061
00:58:46,961 --> 00:58:48,596
Why didn't you answer?
1062
00:58:50,898 --> 00:58:53,667
(exhales)
I don't...
1063
00:58:53,701 --> 00:58:55,970
I don't know.
1064
00:58:56,003 --> 00:58:57,238
Okay.
1065
00:59:00,141 --> 00:59:02,977
I think you do, but... okay.
1066
00:59:03,010 --> 00:59:06,580
(sighs) Maybe because
I thought we were good.
1067
00:59:06,614 --> 00:59:09,617
I thought things were fine
the way they were.
1068
00:59:09,650 --> 00:59:11,285
Fine.
1069
00:59:11,318 --> 00:59:14,688
(stammering)
I'm in love with you.
1070
00:59:14,722 --> 00:59:17,291
Oh, my God.
I am in love with you too.
1071
00:59:17,324 --> 00:59:18,926
I didn't say I was
in love with you.
1072
00:59:18,959 --> 00:59:21,862
I'm saying that
I thought we were good.
1073
00:59:21,896 --> 00:59:23,697
I liked us.
1074
00:59:23,731 --> 00:59:26,667
I didn't want to fuck that up
by getting married.
1075
00:59:26,700 --> 00:59:29,370
(stammering)
But we are getting married.
1076
00:59:29,403 --> 00:59:31,338
We're engaged to be married.
1077
00:59:31,372 --> 00:59:33,908
Yes, of course, we are.
I just...
1078
00:59:36,010 --> 00:59:38,612
Things are different now.
1079
00:59:38,646 --> 00:59:42,850
Why are things
suddenly different?
1080
00:59:42,883 --> 00:59:45,986
I don't know.
They just are.
1081
00:59:46,020 --> 00:59:49,056
So you're saying you definitely
want to get married to me?
1082
00:59:49,090 --> 00:59:50,825
That's what you're saying?
1083
00:59:50,858 --> 00:59:54,061
- Yes, I do.
- Okay. When?
1084
00:59:57,998 --> 01:00:01,035
I'm sorry. Are you really asking
me to set a date right now?
1085
01:00:01,068 --> 01:00:04,105
Mm-hmm. Like, October.
1086
01:00:04,138 --> 01:00:07,341
January, June.
1087
01:00:07,374 --> 01:00:09,977
- June.
- What kind of cake?
1088
01:00:10,010 --> 01:00:12,847
Chocolate.
1089
01:00:12,880 --> 01:00:15,082
All right, should we invite
everyone we know,
1090
01:00:15,116 --> 01:00:17,384
or just our close friends,
1091
01:00:17,418 --> 01:00:21,055
Ah, what should our vows be?
1092
01:00:21,088 --> 01:00:23,691
- What do you want your dress to look like?
- I don't know.
1093
01:00:23,724 --> 01:00:24,859
I told you, I don't
care about this stuff.
1094
01:00:24,892 --> 01:00:26,694
Right, you don't
care about it,
1095
01:00:26,727 --> 01:00:28,796
because you don't actually
want to get married.
1096
01:00:28,829 --> 01:00:31,332
No. I don't care about it,
1097
01:00:31,365 --> 01:00:34,101
because I actually like
our life.
1098
01:00:34,135 --> 01:00:36,437
It's not real.
1099
01:00:36,470 --> 01:00:38,772
It's a practice life.
1100
01:00:38,806 --> 01:00:40,941
We're just playing house.
1101
01:00:40,975 --> 01:00:42,276
We have both of our names
on the lease,
1102
01:00:42,309 --> 01:00:44,078
but that's where it stops
for you.
1103
01:00:46,847 --> 01:00:48,949
I want to spend my life
with you.
1104
01:00:51,452 --> 01:00:53,120
My whole entire life.
1105
01:00:55,756 --> 01:00:57,224
I wanna... I wanna...
1106
01:00:59,460 --> 01:01:01,061
I wanna get a house together.
1107
01:01:01,095 --> 01:01:02,997
I wanna have kids together.
1108
01:01:03,030 --> 01:01:06,066
I want us to get old
1109
01:01:06,100 --> 01:01:08,169
and die together.
1110
01:01:11,906 --> 01:01:13,807
Isn't that what you want?
1111
01:01:30,891 --> 01:01:31,926
(exhales)
1112
01:01:41,168 --> 01:01:42,269
No.
1113
01:01:46,807 --> 01:01:47,942
No?
1114
01:01:56,116 --> 01:01:57,519
- Oh, man.
- Oh, no.
1115
01:01:57,552 --> 01:01:59,420
(both stammering)
1116
01:02:02,289 --> 01:02:05,459
No, that's... That...
That is a third of my life.
1117
01:02:06,927 --> 01:02:09,263
That's ten years...
1118
01:02:09,296 --> 01:02:12,266
wasted with you.
1119
01:02:14,034 --> 01:02:15,402
Wait.
1120
01:02:15,436 --> 01:02:17,972
I was saying I was happy.
1121
01:02:18,005 --> 01:02:21,008
- (door opens)
- (sighs)
1122
01:02:21,041 --> 01:02:22,176
(door closes)
1123
01:02:28,949 --> 01:02:30,818
- Dougie!
- Not now, man.
1124
01:02:56,844 --> 01:02:57,978
(engine starts)
1125
01:03:38,185 --> 01:03:39,554
(switch clicks)
1126
01:03:44,158 --> 01:03:46,160
(door slams in distance)
1127
01:03:50,030 --> 01:03:51,932
♪♪
1128
01:04:56,029 --> 01:04:57,464
(birds twittering)
1129
01:04:59,466 --> 01:05:01,201
(crow cawing)
1130
01:05:08,108 --> 01:05:09,977
- (clattering)
- (wood creaking)
1131
01:05:12,446 --> 01:05:14,114
(cans clattering)
1132
01:05:25,225 --> 01:05:27,194
(knocking on door)
1133
01:05:27,227 --> 01:05:28,630
(sighs)
1134
01:05:28,663 --> 01:05:31,198
(knocking continues)
1135
01:05:36,503 --> 01:05:39,373
- Bea!
- She's not here.
1136
01:05:39,406 --> 01:05:41,008
What?
1137
01:05:43,410 --> 01:05:45,580
Bea! Okay, where is she?
1138
01:05:45,613 --> 01:05:46,947
I have no idea.
1139
01:05:48,148 --> 01:05:50,317
Seriously.
1140
01:05:50,350 --> 01:05:52,419
She didn't come back
last night.
1141
01:05:52,453 --> 01:05:56,089
I mean, I looked
for her for awhile,
1142
01:05:56,123 --> 01:05:57,759
but I figured she'd eventually
come back to the room
1143
01:05:57,792 --> 01:06:02,196
or to yours,
but she's gone.
1144
01:06:02,229 --> 01:06:03,531
Isn't the ceremony in, like,
three or...
1145
01:06:03,565 --> 01:06:05,399
Four hours. No shit.
1146
01:06:08,168 --> 01:06:09,671
(stammering)
1147
01:06:09,704 --> 01:06:11,438
What if, like,
a mountain lion got her?
1148
01:06:11,472 --> 01:06:14,007
Oh, I don't think there
are mountain lions here.
1149
01:06:14,041 --> 01:06:16,043
Okay, fine. I don't know,
something else then.
1150
01:06:16,076 --> 01:06:18,111
It's the woods.
1151
01:06:18,145 --> 01:06:20,548
- I mean, anything can happen in the woods.
- (door opens)
1152
01:06:25,352 --> 01:06:27,789
What's going on?
1153
01:06:27,822 --> 01:06:31,759
Okay, so I've checked here,
here, and here.
1154
01:06:31,793 --> 01:06:33,093
We'll check
the bocce ball court.
1155
01:06:33,126 --> 01:06:34,596
And I could check the pool.
1156
01:06:34,629 --> 01:06:36,531
And there's a section
of woods over here.
1157
01:06:36,564 --> 01:06:39,299
Okay, great. And anyone who
finds her, just let me know.
1158
01:06:39,333 --> 01:06:40,802
Okay, Doug and Lori,
1159
01:06:40,835 --> 01:06:42,804
we'll start at the tennis courts
1160
01:06:42,837 --> 01:06:44,572
- and fan out from there.
- Okay.
1161
01:06:44,606 --> 01:06:47,709
Adelaide, I was hoping
you could do us a big favor
1162
01:06:47,742 --> 01:06:50,545
and just head to the reception hall
and find Tia the wedding coordinator.
1163
01:06:50,578 --> 01:06:52,547
I'm not going anywhere.
1164
01:06:52,580 --> 01:06:55,683
Well, this is kind of an "all
hands on deck" situation.
1165
01:06:55,717 --> 01:06:58,686
When Bea was 14 years old,
1166
01:06:58,720 --> 01:07:02,624
she asked me if she could go
to horseback riding camp.
1167
01:07:02,657 --> 01:07:05,560
Mind you,
she'd never ridden a horse.
1168
01:07:05,593 --> 01:07:08,195
But she would not shut up
about it until I caved.
1169
01:07:08,228 --> 01:07:11,465
So June came,
and we went to Eugene,
1170
01:07:11,498 --> 01:07:13,768
and I dropped her off.
1171
01:07:13,801 --> 01:07:18,338
Three days in, I get a call.
Bea's missing.
1172
01:07:18,372 --> 01:07:21,141
I get back to Eugene.
1173
01:07:21,174 --> 01:07:25,145
I call the police.
Lori, tell them where we found Bea.
1174
01:07:26,413 --> 01:07:28,282
In a diner
eating a banana split.
1175
01:07:28,315 --> 01:07:33,153
"I guess I don't like horses,"
she said,
1176
01:07:33,186 --> 01:07:35,790
and that day, I learned...
1177
01:07:35,823 --> 01:07:39,293
if Bea's running, she's done.
1178
01:07:39,326 --> 01:07:42,564
And no one can do anything
about it.
1179
01:07:42,597 --> 01:07:45,299
Not me...
1180
01:07:45,332 --> 01:07:46,601
and especially not you.
1181
01:07:50,772 --> 01:07:52,540
I'll start making calls.
1182
01:07:56,176 --> 01:07:57,444
Excuse me.
1183
01:07:59,446 --> 01:08:01,148
This wedding is happening.
1184
01:08:03,183 --> 01:08:06,621
Whether you like it or not,
I'm marrying your daughter today.
1185
01:08:08,590 --> 01:08:11,626
I know I'm not
what you pictured.
1186
01:08:11,659 --> 01:08:15,429
I'm almost 40, divorced.
1187
01:08:15,462 --> 01:08:20,233
I've got a kid who's way more
mature than I'll ever be.
1188
01:08:20,267 --> 01:08:23,170
But I love Bea.
1189
01:08:24,539 --> 01:08:27,508
And I know I can make her happy.
1190
01:08:29,443 --> 01:08:32,379
And right now, she's out there
waiting for me to find her.
1191
01:08:32,412 --> 01:08:34,147
To fight for her.
1192
01:08:36,517 --> 01:08:41,756
And you know these scrunchies
you all laugh at?
1193
01:08:41,789 --> 01:08:43,658
They're awesome.
1194
01:08:43,691 --> 01:08:45,526
She wrote a
whole business plan.
1195
01:08:45,560 --> 01:08:47,361
She's got investors
I had nothing to do with.
1196
01:08:47,394 --> 01:08:50,898
Did she tell you that Goop
wants to sell them?
1197
01:08:50,932 --> 01:08:52,567
Yeah.
1198
01:08:55,603 --> 01:08:59,507
So here's what's gonna happen.
1199
01:08:59,540 --> 01:09:04,411
I'm gonna need you to go find
Tia, the wedding coordinator,
1200
01:09:04,444 --> 01:09:08,215
and make sure that everything's
set for the ceremony this afternoon
1201
01:09:08,248 --> 01:09:10,685
and then stay out of my way,
1202
01:09:10,718 --> 01:09:12,419
'cause I'm gonna go get
your daughter back.
1203
01:09:14,454 --> 01:09:16,256
Let's go to the tennis courts.
1204
01:09:17,825 --> 01:09:19,661
♪♪
1205
01:09:25,733 --> 01:09:27,367
We should split up.
1206
01:09:27,401 --> 01:09:28,936
I'm gonna go
to the reception hall.
1207
01:09:28,970 --> 01:09:30,738
Doug, you check the goats.
1208
01:09:30,772 --> 01:09:32,874
Lori, you know, that waterfall
near the lake?
1209
01:09:32,907 --> 01:09:35,977
Lori? What's up?
1210
01:09:36,010 --> 01:09:38,713
"If you're feeling sad
or missing home"?
1211
01:09:38,746 --> 01:09:40,748
I know where she is.
1212
01:09:47,822 --> 01:09:49,289
She's not here.
1213
01:09:49,322 --> 01:09:51,559
Well, did you look everywhere?
1214
01:09:51,592 --> 01:09:54,261
It's 10 square feet.
I'm coming down.
1215
01:09:54,294 --> 01:09:56,496
Shoot.
I really thought I had it.
1216
01:09:56,531 --> 01:09:59,767
Is there something else...
1217
01:09:59,801 --> 01:10:01,002
she mentioned while
we were here?
1218
01:10:01,035 --> 01:10:02,469
Some other place maybe?
1219
01:10:02,502 --> 01:10:05,272
If we just retrace our steps...
1220
01:10:05,305 --> 01:10:07,240
Why would she have traced
our steps?
1221
01:10:07,274 --> 01:10:10,243
Guys, it's her.
It's Bea.
1222
01:10:10,277 --> 01:10:12,013
I love you so much,
but I can't...
1223
01:10:12,046 --> 01:10:14,882
I can't do it. I can't do it.
I'm so sorry.
1224
01:10:14,916 --> 01:10:17,518
I know where she is.
1225
01:10:17,552 --> 01:10:19,687
- Okay, well, where is she?
- Please share.
1226
01:10:19,721 --> 01:10:22,523
Jesus, he's fast.
1227
01:10:28,896 --> 01:10:30,497
Why would she be here?
1228
01:10:32,066 --> 01:10:33,534
Oh, thank God.
1229
01:10:45,345 --> 01:10:47,247
Lake of the Ozarks, baby.
1230
01:10:51,085 --> 01:10:52,820
BEA: But how?
1231
01:10:52,854 --> 01:10:54,856
How do you know
I won't wreck this?
1232
01:10:54,889 --> 01:10:55,957
JAYSON: 'Cause I won't let
that happen.
1233
01:10:55,990 --> 01:10:57,759
- My mom's right!
- No.
1234
01:10:57,792 --> 01:10:59,761
I'm a flake, I get bored.
1235
01:10:59,794 --> 01:11:01,829
I disappoint every person
in my life.
1236
01:11:01,863 --> 01:11:04,599
- Bea...
- I can't get married.
1237
01:11:04,632 --> 01:11:07,300
Yes, we can.
1238
01:11:07,334 --> 01:11:09,503
BEA: So what if we wake up
one morning
1239
01:11:09,537 --> 01:11:12,339
and realize we don't actually
like each other that much?
1240
01:11:12,372 --> 01:11:14,341
That's never gonna happen.
1241
01:11:14,374 --> 01:11:17,945
It already happened
to you once.
1242
01:11:17,979 --> 01:11:19,747
- I can't.
- Wait.
1243
01:11:19,781 --> 01:11:22,349
- I can't.
- We're different.
1244
01:11:22,382 --> 01:11:23,684
- This is different.
- Just...
1245
01:11:25,686 --> 01:11:27,655
Can you guys just tell everyone
it's cancelled?
1246
01:11:31,559 --> 01:11:33,426
No.
1247
01:11:33,460 --> 01:11:36,097
What do you mean, no?
1248
01:11:36,130 --> 01:11:38,331
We're not going to let you
do this.
1249
01:11:38,365 --> 01:11:40,535
You love each other.
1250
01:11:40,568 --> 01:11:42,502
Well, I thought you guys
loved each other, too.
1251
01:11:42,537 --> 01:11:44,371
We...
1252
01:11:44,404 --> 01:11:45,773
We did.
1253
01:11:47,474 --> 01:11:51,012
Really hard
for a really long time.
1254
01:11:52,079 --> 01:11:53,648
I still love you.
1255
01:11:56,083 --> 01:11:58,019
I wouldn't trade our ten years
for anything.
1256
01:11:59,587 --> 01:12:03,390
So why can't you
just stay together?
1257
01:12:04,559 --> 01:12:07,094
Please. Just... Just...
1258
01:12:07,128 --> 01:12:08,763
Just stay together.
1259
01:12:10,731 --> 01:12:12,633
Sweetie, we can't.
1260
01:12:12,667 --> 01:12:14,501
But you guys can.
1261
01:12:24,078 --> 01:12:27,380
See? Look at that.
Told you.
1262
01:12:28,816 --> 01:12:30,350
(indistinct)
1263
01:12:34,421 --> 01:12:35,723
They're smiling.
1264
01:12:37,758 --> 01:12:40,027
- (chuckles)
- Thank you.
1265
01:12:40,061 --> 01:12:41,361
Oh.
1266
01:12:42,964 --> 01:12:44,131
Let's do it.
1267
01:12:44,165 --> 01:12:47,635
- I came back.
- Yes, you did.
1268
01:12:48,870 --> 01:12:51,572
- I love you, Mom.
- I love you, too.
1269
01:12:53,875 --> 01:12:55,576
- Well, you...
- Don't.
1270
01:12:55,610 --> 01:12:58,813
- Okay.
- Sorry for calling you a bitch.
1271
01:12:58,846 --> 01:13:01,649
It's okay.
He's a good guy.
1272
01:13:01,682 --> 01:13:04,384
- I told you.
- (chuckles)
1273
01:13:08,689 --> 01:13:10,091
So...
1274
01:13:12,193 --> 01:13:13,561
Yeah.
1275
01:13:23,037 --> 01:13:25,006
We were good, though,
weren't we?
1276
01:13:30,211 --> 01:13:31,746
We were really good.
1277
01:13:47,228 --> 01:13:48,495
(chuckles)
1278
01:13:51,232 --> 01:13:53,868
I now pronounce you
husband and wife.
1279
01:13:55,202 --> 01:13:57,038
- You may kiss the bride.
- (laughs)
1280
01:13:59,006 --> 01:14:00,975
(cheering and applause)
1281
01:14:03,110 --> 01:14:04,679
Yay!
1282
01:14:10,785 --> 01:14:12,053
(laughing)
1283
01:14:18,793 --> 01:14:20,127
(vocalizing)
1284
01:14:24,999 --> 01:14:26,167
♪♪
1285
01:14:36,310 --> 01:14:39,914
♪ There's got to be
another way ♪
1286
01:14:39,947 --> 01:14:41,682
Shall we?
1287
01:14:41,716 --> 01:14:46,821
♪ I've been on my own
all day ♪
1288
01:14:46,854 --> 01:14:51,759
♪ Pretending everything's
all right ♪
1289
01:14:51,792 --> 01:14:55,262
♪ We've been drifting apart ♪
1290
01:14:55,296 --> 01:14:59,499
♪ For sometime ♪
1291
01:15:02,136 --> 01:15:06,540
♪ There's fire burning
in the trees ♪
1292
01:15:07,408 --> 01:15:09,944
♪ May be life is
the way it seems ♪
1293
01:15:09,977 --> 01:15:11,579
What do we tell people?
1294
01:15:13,914 --> 01:15:16,817
When we get back home
and we see our friends,
1295
01:15:16,851 --> 01:15:18,085
what do we say?
1296
01:15:20,154 --> 01:15:23,257
We tell them...
1297
01:15:23,290 --> 01:15:24,692
we broke up.
1298
01:15:26,927 --> 01:15:29,764
♪♪
1299
01:15:49,617 --> 01:15:53,287
♪ I never want to fade away ♪
1300
01:15:55,056 --> 01:15:59,660
♪ Wanna turn
as the seasons change ♪
1301
01:15:59,693 --> 01:16:04,899
♪ And every time
you come around ♪
1302
01:16:04,932 --> 01:16:07,968
♪ Well, the days of the year ♪
1303
01:16:08,002 --> 01:16:11,739
♪ Just slow ♪
1304
01:16:11,772 --> 01:16:12,940
♪ Down ♪
1305
01:16:14,275 --> 01:16:16,777
♪ My love ♪
1306
01:16:19,346 --> 01:16:21,882
♪ My love ♪
1307
01:16:25,019 --> 01:16:27,688
♪ My love ♪
1308
01:16:30,391 --> 01:16:32,693
♪ My love ♪
1309
01:16:35,796 --> 01:16:37,331
♪♪
1310
01:16:59,053 --> 01:17:03,791
Oh, my God. Guys, I have
the biggest news ever.
1311
01:17:03,824 --> 01:17:05,259
(exhales)
1312
01:17:06,694 --> 01:17:08,896
Let's go tell Jayson.
1313
01:17:08,929 --> 01:17:10,364
Let's go.
1314
01:17:10,397 --> 01:17:11,832
♪♪
1315
01:17:15,236 --> 01:17:18,038
Hey, uh, are those my shorts?
1316
01:17:18,072 --> 01:17:20,674
No, they're mine.
1317
01:17:20,708 --> 01:17:22,676
Baby, the oven's broken.
Can you come fix it?
1318
01:17:22,710 --> 01:17:23,878
♪♪ (stops)
1319
01:17:23,911 --> 01:17:25,746
Why are you recording me?
1320
01:17:25,779 --> 01:17:27,915
Oh, come on, just fix the oven.
1321
01:17:27,948 --> 01:17:30,050
- Please? Come on.
- Okay.
1322
01:17:30,084 --> 01:17:33,154
- What's wrong with it?
- I don't know.
1323
01:17:33,187 --> 01:17:36,257
- Well, it's not on.
- It isn't?
1324
01:17:36,290 --> 01:17:39,860
No. And there's just one
hamburger bun in there.
1325
01:17:39,894 --> 01:17:42,062
What... Are we hav...
1326
01:17:42,096 --> 01:17:44,064
Did you put this in here?
1327
01:17:44,098 --> 01:17:46,367
I... I don't know.
1328
01:17:46,400 --> 01:17:48,102
Well, I didn't put it in here.
1329
01:17:48,135 --> 01:17:49,803
Uh, I think you did.
1330
01:17:49,837 --> 01:17:50,971
(chuckles)
1331
01:17:51,005 --> 01:17:52,840
Okay. What is it again?
1332
01:17:52,873 --> 01:17:54,875
It's a bun in the oven.
1333
01:17:54,909 --> 01:17:56,076
Yep.
1334
01:17:56,110 --> 01:17:58,746
Oh, my God.
Baby, really?
1335
01:17:58,779 --> 01:18:00,447
- Are you really pregnant?
- Yes.
1336
01:18:00,481 --> 01:18:01,815
- Seriously?
- Yes!
1337
01:18:01,849 --> 01:18:03,083
Oh, my God.
1338
01:18:03,117 --> 01:18:04,952
This is the best news ever!
1339
01:18:04,985 --> 01:18:07,755
We're having a baby!
We're having a baby!
1340
01:18:07,788 --> 01:18:09,390
We are having a baby!
1341
01:18:09,423 --> 01:18:10,891
We're having a baby!
1342
01:18:10,925 --> 01:18:12,226
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
1343
01:18:12,259 --> 01:18:13,928
♪ We're having a baby! ♪
1344
01:18:17,965 --> 01:18:19,033
♪ We're having ♪
1345
01:18:19,066 --> 01:18:20,100
♪ A baby ♪
1346
01:18:20,134 --> 01:18:21,135
♪ We're having ♪
1347
01:18:21,168 --> 01:18:22,236
♪ A baby ♪
1348
01:18:22,269 --> 01:18:23,470
♪ We're having a baby ♪
1349
01:18:23,504 --> 01:18:26,307
♪ We're having a baby ♪
1350
01:18:28,809 --> 01:18:30,311
♪♪
1351
01:18:37,117 --> 01:18:39,753
♪ I know what's in my heart ♪
1352
01:18:41,222 --> 01:18:43,457
♪ I know that's
where Heaven starts ♪
1353
01:18:43,490 --> 01:18:45,492
♪ It's with you, babe ♪
1354
01:18:45,527 --> 01:18:47,094
♪ It's with
you, babe ♪
1355
01:18:47,127 --> 01:18:48,195
♪ Mm-hmm ♪
1356
01:18:48,253 --> 01:18:52,813
Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
1357
01:18:52,866 --> 01:18:56,303
♪ Waited my whole life
for this ♪
1358
01:18:56,337 --> 01:18:59,139
♪ No way I would let it slip ♪
1359
01:18:59,173 --> 01:19:00,841
♪ But with you, babe ♪
1360
01:19:00,874 --> 01:19:03,511
♪ With you
I never felt like this ♪
1361
01:19:06,113 --> 01:19:10,084
♪ And I say
sha-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
1362
01:19:10,117 --> 01:19:13,821
♪ I feel good,
I feel good ♪
1363
01:19:13,854 --> 01:19:17,559
♪ And I say
sha-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
1364
01:19:17,592 --> 01:19:21,295
♪ I feel good,
I feel good ♪
1365
01:19:23,931 --> 01:19:27,134
♪ And no one gonna
take this from me ♪
1366
01:19:27,167 --> 01:19:29,870
♪ I'm feeling
as good as can be ♪
1367
01:19:29,903 --> 01:19:31,939
♪ Oh, with you, babe ♪
1368
01:19:31,972 --> 01:19:33,140
♪ Oh, with you ♪
1369
01:19:33,173 --> 01:19:35,075
♪ Yeah, my soul is free ♪
1370
01:19:37,244 --> 01:19:40,914
♪ And I say
sha-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
1371
01:19:40,948 --> 01:19:45,019
♪ I feel good,
I feel good ♪
1372
01:19:45,052 --> 01:19:48,556
♪ And I say
sha-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
1373
01:19:48,590 --> 01:19:52,393
♪ I feel good,
I feel good ♪
1374
01:19:54,596 --> 01:19:56,964
♪ And we've come so far now ♪
1375
01:19:56,997 --> 01:20:00,301
♪ And I'm ready for some more ♪
1376
01:20:02,269 --> 01:20:04,838
♪ Bring on tomorrow ♪
1377
01:20:04,872 --> 01:20:07,141
♪ I need more, more ♪
1378
01:20:07,174 --> 01:20:09,877
♪ More ♪
1379
01:20:11,178 --> 01:20:14,948
♪ Ooh ♪
1380
01:20:14,982 --> 01:20:18,986
♪ Yeah ♪
1381
01:20:19,019 --> 01:20:22,524
♪ Ooh ♪
1382
01:20:22,557 --> 01:20:26,093
♪ Yeah ♪
1383
01:20:26,126 --> 01:20:30,230
♪ Ooh ♪
1384
01:20:30,264 --> 01:20:32,333
♪ Yeah ♪
95825
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