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1
00:00:25,112 --> 00:00:27,897
♪ I LIVE 2 COUNTIES
FROM THE HOMETOWN ♪
2
00:00:27,940 --> 00:00:31,770
♪ THE REUNION,
AND EVERYBODY'S COMING NOW ♪
3
00:00:31,814 --> 00:00:34,338
♪ AIN'T SEEN MY BROTHERS
OR MY COUSINS ♪
4
00:00:34,382 --> 00:00:37,037
♪ THE NEIGHBORHOOD
IN ABOUT 2 YEARS ♪
5
00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:39,822
♪ I GOT AN UNCLE
OUT IN CALI ♪
6
00:00:39,865 --> 00:00:42,694
♪ FAVORITE AUNTIE
IN NEW YORK CITY ♪
7
00:00:42,738 --> 00:00:45,654
♪ THEY'RE FLYING IN
WITH THEIR FAMILIES ♪
8
00:00:45,697 --> 00:00:48,178
♪ GOT MY NEPHEWS
AND MY NIECES ALL THERE ♪
9
00:00:48,222 --> 00:00:51,312
♪ EVERYBODY JUST SMILING
AND LAUGHING ♪
10
00:00:51,355 --> 00:00:53,966
♪ REMINISCING ABOUT
WHEN THEY WERE CHILDREN ♪
11
00:00:54,010 --> 00:00:57,144
♪ BOY, IT FEELS GOOD
TO SEE EVERYBODY ♪
12
00:00:57,187 --> 00:01:00,408
♪ EATING AND DRINKING
AT A BACKYARD PARTY ♪
13
00:01:00,451 --> 00:01:01,800
♪ OH, MY
14
00:01:01,844 --> 00:01:04,107
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
LIONS GATE ENTERTAINMENT
15
00:01:04,150 --> 00:01:06,414
Boy: YO, TODD,
WHERE THE FLOODS AT?
16
00:01:06,457 --> 00:01:11,201
YEAH, TODD, IS THE FLOOD
COMING THIS WAY?
17
00:01:11,245 --> 00:01:12,768
[BELL RINGS]
18
00:01:12,811 --> 00:01:15,901
Woman: BLING AND WHEEZER,
QUIT HORSING AROUND.
19
00:01:15,945 --> 00:01:16,989
GET TO CLASS.
20
00:01:17,033 --> 00:01:19,209
DON'T LISTEN TO THEM.
THEY'RE STUPID.
21
00:01:19,253 --> 00:01:20,167
YEAH, I KNOW.
22
00:01:20,210 --> 00:01:21,385
DON'T WORRY.
I'LL ALWAYS BE THERE
23
00:01:21,429 --> 00:01:24,301
FOR YOU, TODD ANDERSEN.
DOO-DOO HEAD.
24
00:01:24,345 --> 00:01:25,520
THANKS, BECKY.
25
00:01:25,563 --> 00:01:26,912
♪ SOUL FOOD,
OOH, THE SMOTHERED CHICKEN ♪
26
00:01:26,956 --> 00:01:30,046
♪ NOW I SWEAR, Y'ALL,
IT'S THE BEST I EVER TASTED ♪
27
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:32,614
♪ MY MAMA
GOT ME SO EMBARRASSED ♪
28
00:01:32,657 --> 00:01:35,138
♪ SHOWING BABY PICTURES
OF ME NAKED ♪
29
00:01:35,182 --> 00:01:38,489
♪ ME AND MY COUSIN,
OOH, WE USED TO KICK IT ♪
30
00:01:38,533 --> 00:01:41,536
♪ CAUGHT SMOKING,
AND DID WE GET A WHIPPING ♪
31
00:01:41,579 --> 00:01:44,234
♪ WE WERE LUCKY
MAMA DIDN'T CATCH US ♪
32
00:01:44,278 --> 00:01:47,411
♪ IF SHE DID, WE'D HAVE BEEN
WHIPPED HARDER ♪
33
00:01:47,455 --> 00:01:50,066
♪ EVERYBODY JUST SMILING
AND LAUGHING ♪
34
00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:53,417
♪ REMINISCING ABOUT
WHEN THEY WERE CHILDREN ♪
35
00:01:53,461 --> 00:01:55,637
♪ BOY, IT WAS GOOD
TO SEE EVERYBODY ♪
36
00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:58,683
♪ EATING AND DRINKING
AT A BACKYARD PARTY ♪
37
00:01:58,727 --> 00:02:01,643
♪ OH, MY
38
00:02:01,686 --> 00:02:03,732
♪ MY WHOLE FAMILY'S HERE
39
00:02:03,775 --> 00:02:06,778
♪ LOVE'S IN THE AIR
40
00:02:06,822 --> 00:02:10,826
♪ AND IT FEELS
JUST LIKE HOME ♪
41
00:02:10,869 --> 00:02:14,525
♪ YEAH, OH,
MY FAMILY'S HERE ♪
42
00:02:14,569 --> 00:02:17,833
♪ FROM EVERYWHERE,
FROM ALL AROUND, YEAH ♪
43
00:02:17,876 --> 00:02:20,314
♪ OH, MY FAMILY'S HERE
44
00:02:20,357 --> 00:02:22,446
♪ REUNION
45
00:02:22,490 --> 00:02:24,274
♪ IT'S THE ONES YOU MISS
46
00:02:24,318 --> 00:02:25,710
♪ THE OLD FRIENDS, TOO
47
00:02:25,754 --> 00:02:28,496
♪ OUR HEARTS ARE TIED,
SOME BARBECUE ♪
48
00:02:28,539 --> 00:02:31,368
♪ THE ATMOSPHERE
THAT OPENS YOU ♪
49
00:02:31,412 --> 00:02:34,110
♪ IT'S LIKE FINDING
YOUR FIRST LOVE ♪
50
00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:36,591
Man: TODD, HOW DOES IT
FEEL TO HAVE
51
00:02:36,634 --> 00:02:38,941
ALL OF THE EXPERTS
PICKING YOU
52
00:02:38,984 --> 00:02:40,247
TO GO FIRST
IN THE DRAFT?
53
00:02:40,290 --> 00:02:42,074
BROKE, FROM BRIBING
ALL THOSE EXPERTS.
54
00:02:42,118 --> 00:02:43,424
NO, NO,
I'M JUST PLAYING.
55
00:02:43,467 --> 00:02:45,208
NO, SERIOUSLY,
I'M HONORED
56
00:02:45,252 --> 00:02:47,515
THAT PEOPLE LOVE
MY GAME THAT MUCH.
57
00:02:47,558 --> 00:02:49,125
BUT THERE WILL BE
A LOT OF GOOD PLAYERS
58
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,170
IN THE DRAFT TOMORROW,
59
00:02:50,213 --> 00:02:51,388
AND THE FIRST PICK
COULD BE ANYBODY.
60
00:02:51,432 --> 00:02:52,737
NOW, TODD,
YOU WERE RAISED
61
00:02:52,781 --> 00:02:54,217
IN THE GHETTO,
THE HOOD,
62
00:02:54,261 --> 00:02:56,828
DRAGGED UP
IN THE STREETS
63
00:02:56,872 --> 00:02:59,744
AFTER YOUR FATHER
ABANDONED YOU AND YOUR MOTHER.
64
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,138
MY DAD NEVER LEFT.
HE'S RIGHT HERE.
65
00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:03,705
THIS IS MY DAD.
66
00:03:03,748 --> 00:03:06,229
NO GOVERNMENT
CHEESE?
67
00:03:06,273 --> 00:03:07,404
NO WELFARE?
68
00:03:07,448 --> 00:03:08,275
NO.
69
00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:09,493
MY PARENTS
WORKED VERY HARD
70
00:03:09,537 --> 00:03:11,191
TO PAY THE BILLS
AND KEEP CLOTHES ON MY BACK.
71
00:03:11,234 --> 00:03:12,975
SO, MR. AND MRS.
ANDERSEN,
72
00:03:13,018 --> 00:03:14,716
ONCE TODD IS SELECTED
IN THE DRAFT,
73
00:03:14,759 --> 00:03:16,196
HE STANDS
TO MAKE MILLIONS.
74
00:03:16,239 --> 00:03:18,459
DO YOU THINK THINGS WILL
CHANGE FOR YOUR FAMILY?
75
00:03:18,502 --> 00:03:21,549
WE'RE A DOWN-HOME
KIND OF PEOPLE.
76
00:03:21,592 --> 00:03:23,246
WE RAISED TODD
TO KNOW
77
00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:24,421
THAT FAMILY VALUES
78
00:03:24,465 --> 00:03:26,380
ARE MORE IMPORTANT
THAN MONEY.
79
00:03:26,423 --> 00:03:27,381
WHAT ABOUT ALCOHOLISM,
80
00:03:27,424 --> 00:03:31,167
DRUG ABUSE,
THE SMOKE, THE DRINK?
81
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:33,604
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?
82
00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:34,910
NO?
83
00:03:34,953 --> 00:03:36,999
ANYTHING?
84
00:03:37,042 --> 00:03:38,261
TOMORROW
WILL PROBABLY BE
85
00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:39,523
A HISTORICAL DAY
FOR YOUR FAMILY.
86
00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:40,785
HOW DO YOU PLAN
ON CELEBRATING?
87
00:03:40,829 --> 00:03:43,745
WE'RE GONNA CELEBRATE IT
THE WAY THE ANDERSENS
88
00:03:43,788 --> 00:03:46,095
HAVE ALWAYS CELEBRATED
FOR GENERATIONS.
89
00:03:46,138 --> 00:03:47,618
WE'RE HAVING
A FAMILY...
90
00:03:47,662 --> 00:03:49,838
COOKOUT!
COOKOUT!
COOKOUT!
91
00:03:49,881 --> 00:03:51,622
WELL, THAT'S ALL
OUR TIME FOR NOW.
92
00:03:51,666 --> 00:03:53,668
TODD, MR. AND MRS.
ANDERSEN, THANK YOU.
93
00:03:53,711 --> 00:03:55,844
AND GOOD LUCK
TOMORROW IN THE DRAFT.
94
00:03:55,887 --> 00:03:59,369
FOR SPORTS TIME,
I'M A.C. CHARLES.
95
00:03:59,413 --> 00:04:01,241
AND I'M
PEARCE GABRIEL.
96
00:04:01,284 --> 00:04:02,416
GOOD NIGHT.
97
00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:04,156
WHAT WAS THAT?
WHO THE...
98
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:06,855
YOU CAN STOP
ALL THAT SMILING.
99
00:04:06,898 --> 00:04:08,335
THE CAMERA'S OFF.
100
00:04:08,378 --> 00:04:10,293
THE CAMERA
LOVES ME, WOMAN.
101
00:04:10,337 --> 00:04:13,209
I OUGHT TO HAVE
MY OWN TV SHOW.
102
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:14,254
HOW WAS I?
103
00:04:14,297 --> 00:04:16,995
I DIDN'T COME OFF
TOO STIFF, DID I?
104
00:04:17,039 --> 00:04:18,475
SANFORD AND JOJO.
105
00:04:18,519 --> 00:04:19,911
JOJO AND THE SEX.
106
00:04:19,954 --> 00:04:21,303
NO, BABY,
YOU WERE FINE.
107
00:04:21,348 --> 00:04:23,219
YOU GO ON UP
AND GET SOME SLEEP.
108
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,308
YOU GOT A BIG DAY
TOMORROW.
109
00:04:25,352 --> 00:04:27,615
EVERYBODY
LOVES JOJO.
110
00:04:27,658 --> 00:04:29,312
I GOT IT! AH!
111
00:04:29,356 --> 00:04:31,749
WHO WANTS
TO MARRY JOJO?
112
00:04:31,793 --> 00:04:35,318
I GOT A PERFECT SHOW
FOR YOU, JOJO.
113
00:04:35,362 --> 00:04:36,667
HUH?
114
00:04:36,711 --> 00:04:39,191
JACKASS.
115
00:04:39,235 --> 00:04:41,063
I DO NOT CARE
WHAT IT TAKES.
116
00:04:41,106 --> 00:04:42,847
THERE IS NO WAY
HE'S GOING TO NEW JERSEY.
117
00:04:42,891 --> 00:04:45,154
YO, DUDE, I KNOW I DON'T HAVE
THE NUMBER-ONE PICK,
118
00:04:45,197 --> 00:04:46,764
AND THAT'S NOT
WHAT THIS IS ABOUT.
119
00:04:46,808 --> 00:04:48,375
I WANT HIM TAKING US
TO THE CHAMPIONSHIP,
120
00:04:48,418 --> 00:04:51,116
AND HE CAN'T DO THAT
ANYWHERE ELSE. IS THAT CLEAR?
121
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:54,294
TODD ANDERSEN IS COMING
TO DALLAS. ARE WE STRAIGHT?
122
00:04:54,337 --> 00:04:55,773
GET HIS ASS HERE.
123
00:04:55,817 --> 00:04:57,688
Marv Albert: WE ARE
IN NEW YORK CITY,
124
00:04:57,732 --> 00:04:59,342
THE MECCA
OF PROFESSIONAL BASKETBALL,
125
00:04:59,386 --> 00:05:01,039
WHERE LEGENDS
HAVE BEEN MADE.
126
00:05:01,083 --> 00:05:03,390
LIVE FROM MADISON
SQUARE GARDEN,
127
00:05:03,433 --> 00:05:07,176
IT'S THE 38th ANNUAL
PROFESSIONAL BASKETBALL DRAFT,
128
00:05:07,219 --> 00:05:10,527
WHERE THE NEXT CROP
OF YOUNG SUPERSTARS,
129
00:05:10,571 --> 00:05:15,053
LED BY 3-TIME ALL-AMERICAN
TODD ANDERSEN OUT OF RUTGERS,
130
00:05:15,097 --> 00:05:19,014
WILL TAKE THAT NEXT STEP
INTO THE PROFESSIONAL RANKS.
131
00:05:19,057 --> 00:05:22,496
HI, EVERYBODY. I'M MARV ALBERT
HERE ON THE FLOOR
132
00:05:22,539 --> 00:05:24,149
WITH A COUPLE
OF THE GAME'S BEST--
133
00:05:24,193 --> 00:05:26,326
ELTON BRAND
AND BARON DAVIS.
134
00:05:26,369 --> 00:05:28,545
NOW, ELTON,
IS THIS KID TODD ANDERSEN
135
00:05:28,589 --> 00:05:29,546
AS GOOD AS THE HYPE,
136
00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:31,331
AND CAN HE TURN AROUND
A FRANCHISE?
137
00:05:31,374 --> 00:05:33,071
WELL, MARV,
IF NEW JERSEY SELECTS
138
00:05:33,115 --> 00:05:35,160
TODD ANDERSEN WITH
THE NUMBER-ONE PICK,
139
00:05:35,204 --> 00:05:36,858
THEY'LL BE GETTING A KID
WITH TONS OF POTENTIAL.
140
00:05:36,901 --> 00:05:39,164
GUYS THAT ARE IN THE PROS
LIKE MYSELF, BARON DAVIS,
141
00:05:39,208 --> 00:05:41,341
WE'RE EXCITED TO SEE
WHAT THIS KID HAS
142
00:05:41,384 --> 00:05:43,038
AND REALLY WANT
TO TAKE IT TO HIM.
143
00:05:43,081 --> 00:05:44,996
A CANDID STATEMENT
FROM ONE OF THE GAME'S BEST.
144
00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:48,783
NOW, BARON, DOES NEW JERSEY
KEEP THAT NUMBER-ONE PICK
145
00:05:48,826 --> 00:05:49,914
AND TAKE TODD ANDERSEN?
146
00:05:49,958 --> 00:05:51,176
THERE'S BEEN A LOT
OF RUMORS CIRCULATING
147
00:05:51,220 --> 00:05:53,091
THAT MARK CUBAN
WANTS TO MOVE UP
148
00:05:53,135 --> 00:05:55,485
AND TAKE TODD ANDERSEN
WITH THE NUMBER-ONE PICK.
149
00:05:55,529 --> 00:05:58,445
AND WE ALL KNOW THAT WHEN
MARK CUBAN WANTS SOMETHING,
150
00:05:58,488 --> 00:05:59,620
HE USUALLY GETS IT.
151
00:05:59,663 --> 00:06:01,404
SO I'M PRETTY EXCITED
TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
152
00:06:01,448 --> 00:06:02,666
YES, IT IS
ALWAYS INTERESTING
153
00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:06,801
TO SEE IF CUBAN'S
WHATEVER-IT-TAKES ATTITUDE
154
00:06:06,844 --> 00:06:07,541
PAYS OFF.
155
00:06:07,584 --> 00:06:09,064
WE'RE JUST MOMENTS AWAY
156
00:06:09,107 --> 00:06:12,981
FOR THE DOORS TO SWING OPEN
FOR THE LEAGUE'S FUTURE STARS.
157
00:06:13,024 --> 00:06:14,417
NEW JERSEY
IS ON THE CLOCK.
158
00:06:14,461 --> 00:06:19,335
WE'LL BE BACK WITH THAT
FIRST PICK AFTER THESE WORDS.
159
00:06:24,906 --> 00:06:26,777
I GOT TO USE
THE BATHROOM AGAIN.
160
00:06:26,821 --> 00:06:29,606
WILL YOU PLEASE
JUST RELAX? NOW COME ON.
161
00:06:29,650 --> 00:06:31,434
YOU'RE GONNA BE
FINE, ALL RIGHT?
162
00:06:31,478 --> 00:06:34,568
TODD, NO MATTER
WHAT HAPPENS HERE TODAY,
163
00:06:34,611 --> 00:06:35,786
NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS,
164
00:06:35,830 --> 00:06:37,745
YOU'RE ALWAYS
GONNA BE NUMBER ONE
165
00:06:37,788 --> 00:06:40,051
IN ME AND YOUR DADDY'S EYES.
YOU HEAR ME?
166
00:06:40,095 --> 00:06:41,749
THAT'S RIGHT.
167
00:06:41,792 --> 00:06:42,576
WHOO!
168
00:06:42,619 --> 00:06:43,794
SORRY I'M LATE.
169
00:06:43,838 --> 00:06:44,926
I HAD TO PUT ON MY FACE
170
00:06:44,969 --> 00:06:46,449
IN CASE THERE'S ANY CAMERAS
OR ANYTHING.
171
00:06:46,493 --> 00:06:49,452
BABY, DO YOU LIKE MY SHOES?
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THEM?
172
00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:51,367
I THINK THAT I NEEDED
A REALLY NICE PAIR OF HEELS,
173
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:54,805
AND THESE GOT THE LITTLE
STILETTO THING GOING ON. CUTE?
174
00:06:54,849 --> 00:06:56,285
MOM...DAD...
175
00:06:56,328 --> 00:06:57,591
MEET BRITTANY.
176
00:06:57,634 --> 00:07:00,289
MOM? DAD? OH, IT IS SO NICE
TO FINALLY MEET YOU.
177
00:07:00,332 --> 00:07:01,682
I HAVE HEARD SO MUCH
ABOUT YOU GUYS.
178
00:07:01,725 --> 00:07:05,250
OH! I LOVE YOUR SCARF.
WHO IS THIS BY?
179
00:07:05,294 --> 00:07:07,035
UH, UH, HONEY...
180
00:07:07,078 --> 00:07:09,298
LISTEN, THIS IS
VERY ODD, HONEY,
181
00:07:09,341 --> 00:07:12,823
BECAUSE WE HAVEN'T HEARD
ANYTHING ABOUT YOU.
182
00:07:12,867 --> 00:07:14,738
OH. WELL...
183
00:07:14,782 --> 00:07:16,087
THERE WILL BE
SO MUCH TIME
184
00:07:16,131 --> 00:07:17,698
FOR US TO GET
TO KNOW EACH OTHER.
185
00:07:17,741 --> 00:07:19,569
YOU SHOULD BE
SO PROUD OF YOUR SON.
186
00:07:19,613 --> 00:07:20,875
HE IS AMAZING.
187
00:07:20,918 --> 00:07:26,228
HE IS GOING TO BE
A BIG, RICH BASKETBALL PLAYER.
188
00:07:26,271 --> 00:07:27,447
MWAH!
189
00:07:27,490 --> 00:07:28,752
VERY RICH. COME ON, HONEY.
I HAVE SOME PEOPLE
190
00:07:28,796 --> 00:07:32,277
I WANT TO INTRODUCE YOU TO, OK?
EXCUSE US?
191
00:07:34,192 --> 00:07:36,151
JOJO? JOJO, WHO IS SHE?
WHERE DID SHE COME FROM?
192
00:07:36,194 --> 00:07:38,545
WHERE'D SHE COME FROM?
WHERE'D SHE COME FROM?
193
00:07:38,588 --> 00:07:41,330
SHE'S SKANKISH. SHE'S SKANKISH!
WHERE DID SHE COME FROM?
194
00:07:41,373 --> 00:07:44,768
WHERE DID HE MEET HER?
OH, LORD. OH, LORD.
195
00:07:44,812 --> 00:07:47,641
[CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING]
196
00:07:48,250 --> 00:07:50,513
OK, OK. PUT THE BOOK DOWN.
PUT THE BOOK DOWN.
197
00:07:50,557 --> 00:07:52,167
HERE WE GO.
HERE WE GO.
198
00:07:52,210 --> 00:07:54,561
UH, PLEASE BE SEATED.
199
00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:55,866
UH...
200
00:07:55,910 --> 00:07:58,521
WELCOME TO THE NATIONAL
PLAYERS DRAFT.
201
00:07:58,565 --> 00:08:02,569
WE'RE HAPPY TO WELCOME
OUR POTENTIAL DRAFT PICKS
202
00:08:02,612 --> 00:08:03,787
AND THEIR FAMILIES.
203
00:08:03,831 --> 00:08:07,008
MAMA, GET IN HERE!
THIS IS EXCITING!
204
00:08:07,051 --> 00:08:08,139
SHOOT!
205
00:08:08,183 --> 00:08:10,359
YOU THINK COUSIN TODD
WILL INTRODUCE ME
206
00:08:10,402 --> 00:08:11,839
TO ONE OF HIS
BALLER FRIENDS?
207
00:08:11,882 --> 00:08:13,928
I NEED HELP WITH ALL
THESE DAGGONE BILLS
208
00:08:13,971 --> 00:08:16,408
EVER SINCE LEON
VIOLATED HIS PAROLE.
209
00:08:16,452 --> 00:08:18,672
MY KIDS AIN'T HAD
NO FATHER FIGURE.
210
00:08:18,715 --> 00:08:20,151
HOW YOU-ALL
KIDS FEEL
211
00:08:20,195 --> 00:08:22,066
ABOUT CALLING
VINCE CARTER DAD?
212
00:08:22,110 --> 00:08:23,415
[KIDS CHEERING]
213
00:08:23,459 --> 00:08:28,116
LET'S BEGIN WITH THE FIRST PICK
OF THE 2004 DRAFT.
214
00:08:28,159 --> 00:08:32,033
NEW JERSEY PICKS
TODD ANDERSEN
215
00:08:32,076 --> 00:08:34,731
FROM RUTGERS UNIVERSITY.
216
00:08:34,775 --> 00:08:37,691
YES, BABY!
GO AHEAD, CUZ!
217
00:08:37,734 --> 00:08:39,039
NUMBER ONE, BOY!
218
00:08:39,082 --> 00:08:41,738
THAT'S MY BOY!
OH, YEAH!
219
00:08:41,782 --> 00:08:43,653
COME ON UP HERE, TODD.
220
00:08:43,697 --> 00:08:44,567
AAH!
221
00:08:44,611 --> 00:08:45,916
ALL RIGHT.
HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.
222
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,614
COME ON. COME ON.
SIT DOWN.
223
00:08:47,657 --> 00:08:49,267
NUMBER ONE!
224
00:08:49,311 --> 00:08:50,486
I TOLD YOU.
225
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,270
THAT BOY'S GONNA BE
THE NEXT MICHAEL JORDAN!
226
00:08:52,314 --> 00:08:53,141
CONGRATULATIONS.
227
00:08:53,184 --> 00:08:54,708
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU, SIR.
228
00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:56,797
GOT A FEW THINGS
FOR YOU HERE.
229
00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,886
TRY THIS ON
FOR SIZE.
230
00:08:58,929 --> 00:08:59,887
WHOO!
231
00:08:59,930 --> 00:09:02,237
HA HA HA HA.
232
00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:05,545
CONGRATULATIONS.
HA HA HA.
233
00:09:05,588 --> 00:09:08,591
AW, MY MAN
MADE IT, MAN.
234
00:09:08,635 --> 00:09:11,420
MAN, COUSIN TODD
GOT DRAFTED.
235
00:09:11,463 --> 00:09:13,074
DRAFTED?
236
00:09:13,117 --> 00:09:14,205
DAMN THIS WAR!
237
00:09:14,249 --> 00:09:17,252
DOG, HE WAS GONNA BE
THE NEXT DR. J, MAN.
238
00:09:17,295 --> 00:09:18,558
HUH?
239
00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:21,386
COUSIN TODD.
WHY HIM?
240
00:09:21,430 --> 00:09:24,607
YOU'RE STUPID, MAN.
241
00:09:24,651 --> 00:09:26,740
SO ANYWAY, A SISTER
COMES IN THE ROOM, RIGHT?
242
00:09:26,783 --> 00:09:29,917
SO I'M LOOKING AT THE ASS
LIKE, OOH, I GOT 2.
243
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:32,267
THIS IS, LIKE,
A MANAGEOR SOMETHING
244
00:09:32,310 --> 00:09:33,616
ABOUT TO JUMP OFF HERE.
245
00:09:33,660 --> 00:09:35,749
YOU KNOW BLING. I'M ABOUT
TO GET IT POPPING. SO--
246
00:09:35,792 --> 00:09:36,706
HEY, YO, BLING!
247
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:39,056
BLING, ISN'T THAT
YOUR BOY TODD?
248
00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:41,755
DIDN'T HE TAKE YOUR SPOT
WHEN YOU HAD WHOOPING COUGH?
249
00:09:41,798 --> 00:09:43,931
I DIDN'T SAY
WHOOPING COUGH, MAN.
250
00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:46,107
I SAID I WHOOPED HIS ASS,
AND HE STOLE MY GLORY.
251
00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:48,631
YO, HIS POCKETS
IS ABOUT TO BE
252
00:09:48,675 --> 00:09:50,111
REALLY SWOLLEN
RIGHT NOW.
253
00:09:50,154 --> 00:09:51,721
HE'S GONNA BE ABLE
TO BUY A HOUSE.
254
00:09:51,765 --> 00:09:54,463
HE'S GONNA BE ABLE
TO BUY SOME NEW TIMBS.
255
00:09:54,506 --> 00:09:55,769
HE'S GONNA BE ABLE
TO BUY A TIMEX.
256
00:09:55,812 --> 00:09:58,641
HE'S GONNA BE ABLE TO BUY
AN 8-TRACK LIKE MINE.
257
00:09:58,685 --> 00:10:03,037
HE'S GONNA BE ABLE TO BUY
A THOUSAND-PACK OF NOW-LATERS.
258
00:10:03,080 --> 00:10:05,561
YO, LISTEN, LISTEN.
I GOT AN IDEA.
259
00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:06,867
I HEARD THAT A PAIR
260
00:10:06,910 --> 00:10:08,172
OF LEBRON JAMES
SNEAKERS
261
00:10:08,216 --> 00:10:09,652
WENT FOR 3 G's
ON EBAY.
262
00:10:09,696 --> 00:10:10,784
ALLS WE GOT TO DO
263
00:10:10,827 --> 00:10:12,437
IS GET A PAIR OF
SNEAKERS TO TODD--
264
00:10:12,481 --> 00:10:13,830
FORGET THAT.
WE'RE GONNA TAKE
265
00:10:13,874 --> 00:10:15,353
A BUNCH OF SNEAKERS
TO TODD,
266
00:10:15,397 --> 00:10:17,051
GET HIM
TO SIGN THEM,
267
00:10:17,094 --> 00:10:19,967
THEN WE'RE GONNA
PUT IT ON EBAY,
268
00:10:20,010 --> 00:10:21,011
GET PHAT MONEY.
269
00:10:21,055 --> 00:10:23,057
YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT
I'M SAYING NOW?
270
00:10:23,100 --> 00:10:25,799
YEAH. YOU THINK
HE'LL DO IT?
271
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,975
DO I THINK
HE'LL DO IT?
272
00:10:28,018 --> 00:10:29,063
HE BETTER DO IT,
273
00:10:29,106 --> 00:10:31,892
UNLESS HE WANTS THIS
GAT IN HIS MOUTH.
274
00:10:31,935 --> 00:10:35,243
YOU SAID...
YOU SAID GAT OR GUT?
275
00:10:35,286 --> 00:10:36,723
HA HA HA HA.
276
00:10:36,766 --> 00:10:37,985
[WHEEZING]
277
00:10:38,028 --> 00:10:38,986
COME ON, MAN.
278
00:10:39,029 --> 00:10:40,814
I LET MY MOMS
HOLD IT TODAY, MAN.
279
00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:42,032
LET'S GO.
280
00:10:42,076 --> 00:10:44,339
THAT BOY'S GONNA BE
THE NEXT MICHAEL JORDAN.
281
00:10:44,382 --> 00:10:45,993
THAT'S RIGHT, POP.
282
00:10:46,036 --> 00:10:47,385
THAT'S IT!
283
00:10:47,429 --> 00:10:48,822
[TURNS OFF TELEVISION]
284
00:10:48,865 --> 00:10:51,346
IF YOU HAD SPENT
A LITTLE MORE TIME
285
00:10:51,389 --> 00:10:53,391
WORKING WITH YOUR SON
ON HIS JUMP SHOT,
286
00:10:53,435 --> 00:10:56,830
MAYBE HE COULD HAVE BEEN
THE NEXT MICHAEL JORDAN.
287
00:10:56,873 --> 00:10:58,701
MA, COME ON. RELAX, MA.
288
00:10:58,745 --> 00:11:01,617
I JUST WANT TO BE
A DOCTOR.
289
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,097
A DOCTOR?
290
00:11:03,140 --> 00:11:06,013
BOY, DOCTORS
DON'T MAKE NO MONEY
291
00:11:06,056 --> 00:11:09,538
UNLESS
THEY'RE ON E.R.
292
00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:11,714
OK, SUPER.
293
00:11:11,758 --> 00:11:13,411
TODD, I CAN GET YOU
$5 MILLION
294
00:11:13,455 --> 00:11:15,109
IF YOU TATTOO
A PEACOCK LOGO
295
00:11:15,152 --> 00:11:17,720
TO THE BACK
OF YOUR HEAD.
296
00:11:17,764 --> 00:11:18,590
DAMN.
297
00:11:18,634 --> 00:11:20,070
I'M NOT TATTOOING
NO PEACOCK
298
00:11:20,114 --> 00:11:21,593
ON THE BACK
OF MY HEAD, MAN.
299
00:11:21,637 --> 00:11:23,334
RIGHT, RIGHT.
THAT'S A BAD IDEA.
300
00:11:23,378 --> 00:11:24,727
NONETHELESS,
WITH THE TEAM CONTRACT
301
00:11:24,771 --> 00:11:26,250
AND OTHER POTENTIAL
FUTURE ENDORSEMENTS,
302
00:11:26,294 --> 00:11:29,863
YOU'RE GONNA BE IN THE 40
TO $50 MILLION NEIGHBORHOOD.
303
00:11:29,906 --> 00:11:31,342
IS THAT
GROSS OR NET?
304
00:11:31,386 --> 00:11:32,735
WHERE DID YOU
COME FROM?
305
00:11:32,779 --> 00:11:34,041
HAVE WE MET?
IS SHE WITH US?
306
00:11:34,084 --> 00:11:36,739
ANYWAY, YOU'RE GONNA BE ABLE
TO HAVE MORE THINGS
307
00:11:36,783 --> 00:11:38,610
THAN YOU HAVE EVER
DREAMED OF!
308
00:11:38,654 --> 00:11:41,613
HA HA HA!
AND YOU'RE GONNA BE ABLE
309
00:11:41,657 --> 00:11:42,876
TO GIVE BACK
TO THE COMMUNITY,
310
00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:44,704
AND YOU'RE GONNA BE ABLE
TO HELP YOUR PARENTS,
311
00:11:44,747 --> 00:11:47,054
JUST LIKE WE ALWAYS
TALKED ABOUT.
312
00:11:47,097 --> 00:11:48,751
I LOVE THIS KID!
313
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:49,839
MR...
314
00:11:49,883 --> 00:11:50,884
REILLY.
315
00:11:50,927 --> 00:11:52,015
YES. EXCUSE ME.
316
00:11:52,059 --> 00:11:53,669
IT'S GOOD TO KNOW
THAT EVEN THOUGH TODD
317
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,540
IS GETTING
THIS $30 MILLION CONTRACT,
318
00:11:55,584 --> 00:11:58,108
HE WON'T FORGET ABOUT
HIS FAMILY VALUES.
319
00:11:58,152 --> 00:11:59,196
THAT RIGHT?
320
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,111
DON'T GO CHANGING
ON US, BABY.
321
00:12:01,155 --> 00:12:03,592
I WANT YOU TO BE SMART
WITH YOUR MONEY.
322
00:12:03,635 --> 00:12:07,117
COME HERE. YOU GOT
SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE.
323
00:12:07,161 --> 00:12:10,904
YEAH, MAMA CAN GET RID
OF ANY BLEMISH.
324
00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:12,122
LOOK, DON'T WORRY, MA.
325
00:12:12,166 --> 00:12:16,518
ALL I WANT TO DO IS
TAKE CARE OF THE FAMILY.
326
00:12:16,561 --> 00:12:18,955
I WON'T CHANGE.
327
00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:24,526
HEY, JAMAL,
WHAT UP, BABY?
328
00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:26,746
OH, SH...
329
00:12:26,789 --> 00:12:28,922
AW, MAN.
330
00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:30,575
CHOKE!
331
00:12:30,619 --> 00:12:32,447
HA HA HA!
332
00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:33,883
BABY T GOT
HIS FIRST RIDE.
333
00:12:33,927 --> 00:12:35,450
YOU ONLY GOT DRAFTED
2 DAYS AGO,
334
00:12:35,493 --> 00:12:37,757
AND YOU RAN OUT
AND BOUGHT THAT?
335
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,019
COME ON.
336
00:12:39,062 --> 00:12:41,195
WITH A DVD PLAYER
AND A VIDEO GAME?
337
00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:43,197
MAN, GET
IN THE CAR, MAN.
338
00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:44,807
WHAT'S WRONG
WITH YOU, MAN?
339
00:12:44,851 --> 00:12:46,113
LET'S GET OUT
OF HERE, MAN.
340
00:12:46,156 --> 00:12:47,723
MY COUSIN'S
FIRST RIDE, MAN.
341
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:48,942
WHAT'S UP, BOY?
342
00:12:48,985 --> 00:12:51,292
YO, WHAT'S UP, CUZ?
343
00:12:58,081 --> 00:12:59,866
SO I'M TELLING TODD,
I'M, LIKE, LISTEN.
344
00:12:59,909 --> 00:13:01,563
YOU SEE THIS HERE?
THIS IS NO GOOD.
345
00:13:01,606 --> 00:13:02,956
THIS WILL NEVER WORK.
SEE THIS...
346
00:13:02,999 --> 00:13:05,001
THIS IS NO GOOD FOR THE SHOT,
NO GOOD FOR THE SHOT.
347
00:13:05,045 --> 00:13:06,307
WHAT YOU GOT TO DO IS,
348
00:13:06,350 --> 00:13:07,612
YOU GOT TO HAVE THEM
LIKE THIS.
349
00:13:07,656 --> 00:13:08,962
YOU GOT TO SPREAD
YOUR FINGERS
350
00:13:09,005 --> 00:13:10,354
SO YOU GET THAT GOOD
ROTATION ON THE BALL.
351
00:13:10,398 --> 00:13:12,487
I TAUGHT HIM ALL THAT
RIGHT HERE ON THIS COURT,
352
00:13:12,530 --> 00:13:13,793
AND LOOK
WHERE IT GOT HIM.
353
00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:16,056
AH, STOP GAMING.
YOU KNOW TODD ANDERSEN?
354
00:13:16,099 --> 00:13:18,449
WHAT DO YOU THINK
I'M SITTING HERE TELLING YOU?
355
00:13:18,493 --> 00:13:19,842
I TAUGHT HIM
EVERYTHING HE KNOWS
356
00:13:19,886 --> 00:13:21,278
RIGHT HERE
ON THIS COURT.
357
00:13:21,322 --> 00:13:23,193
TODD LEARNED FROM ME--
BLING, BABY.
358
00:13:23,237 --> 00:13:25,413
YO, WHEEZE, TELL THEM
HOW ME AND TODD GO BACK
359
00:13:25,456 --> 00:13:26,849
LIKE CORNROWS, MAN.
360
00:13:26,893 --> 00:13:28,111
SO, WHAT'S NEXT, CUZ?
361
00:13:28,155 --> 00:13:29,765
YOU GONNA GET
A CRIB IN MOUNT CLAIRE?
362
00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:31,114
NAH, I AIN'T
TRYING TO DO THAT.
363
00:13:31,158 --> 00:13:32,986
I'M TRYING TO STAY HERE
WITH MY PEOPLES.
364
00:13:33,029 --> 00:13:33,856
THIS IS WHERE I BELONG.
365
00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:36,206
THIS IS WHERE
THEY WANT ME.
366
00:13:39,906 --> 00:13:41,864
YO, WE GOT NEXT.
367
00:13:41,908 --> 00:13:43,213
TODD ANDERSEN.
368
00:13:43,257 --> 00:13:44,519
WHAT'S A RICH BOY LIKE YOU
DOING AROUND HERE, MAN,
369
00:13:44,562 --> 00:13:45,825
TRYING TO PLAY BALL WITH
HIS HOOD BROTHERS, MAN?
370
00:13:45,868 --> 00:13:46,869
COME ON. WHATEVER, MAN.
IT AIN'T EVEN LIKE THAT.
371
00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:48,871
I'M JUST TRYING TO PLAY
BALL WITH MY HOMEYS.
372
00:13:48,915 --> 00:13:49,959
WE ALREADY GOT
A TEAM, BABY.
373
00:13:50,003 --> 00:13:51,874
SOME REAL STREET
BALLERS, BABY.
374
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,441
NAH, NAH. LET HIM PLAY.
LET HIM PLAY.
375
00:13:53,484 --> 00:13:55,356
HE THINKS HE'S THE MAN, TRYING
TO COME OUT HERE AND SHOW OFF.
376
00:13:55,399 --> 00:13:56,705
NEEDS TO BE TAUGHT
A LESSON.
377
00:13:56,748 --> 00:13:58,359
YO, CHILL. WHY Y'ALL
TRIPPING, MAN?
378
00:13:58,402 --> 00:13:59,839
WE'RE JUST TRYING
TO PLAY BALL.
379
00:13:59,882 --> 00:14:01,362
Y'ALL KNOW ME. I'VE BEEN PLAYING
BALL HERE MY WHOLE LIFE.
380
00:14:01,405 --> 00:14:03,059
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M TRIPPING, RIGHT?
381
00:14:03,103 --> 00:14:06,236
YO, "D" UP, MAN.
$30 MILLION MAN.
382
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,629
THAT'S WHAT
I'M TALKING ABOUT.
383
00:14:07,672 --> 00:14:11,894
LET'S DO IT, BABY. WHATEVER.
YO, GET OVER THERE, MAN.
384
00:14:11,938 --> 00:14:14,331
LOOK. HEY.
385
00:14:15,419 --> 00:14:16,725
I NEED THE SNEAKS.
386
00:14:16,768 --> 00:14:18,727
YO. GIVE ME
YOUR SNEAKERS.
387
00:14:18,770 --> 00:14:20,555
I AIN'T
GIVING YOU JACK.
388
00:14:20,598 --> 00:14:21,730
WHAT DID YOU SAY?
389
00:14:21,773 --> 00:14:23,210
GIVE ME YOUR SNEAKERS
RIGHT NOW.
390
00:14:23,253 --> 00:14:25,038
AND THAT GOES
FOR ALL Y'ALL.
391
00:14:25,081 --> 00:14:26,387
RUN YOUR SNEAKS
RIGHT NOW.
392
00:14:26,430 --> 00:14:27,692
ALL RIGHT,
ALL RIGHT.
393
00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:29,651
MY PLAN'S ABOUT
TO TAKE EFFECT.
394
00:14:29,694 --> 00:14:31,131
GET THESE SNEAKERS.
GET THAT.
395
00:14:31,174 --> 00:14:34,308
YOU GOT IT? YOU GOT IT?
YOU GOT THAT, WHEEZE?
396
00:14:34,351 --> 00:14:35,875
ALL RIGHT, REMEMBER
WHAT I TAUGHT YOU NOW.
397
00:14:35,918 --> 00:14:39,269
SPREAD YOUR FINGERS.
YOU COULD BE SOMETHING.
398
00:14:39,313 --> 00:14:42,098
GIVE IT TO THEM.
LET'S GO, BOYS.
399
00:14:51,542 --> 00:14:54,763
I'M TAKING YOUR BET!
400
00:14:57,113 --> 00:15:00,073
GIVE IT TO HIM.
GIVE IT TO HIM.
401
00:15:12,650 --> 00:15:13,651
HERE, BOY.
402
00:15:13,695 --> 00:15:15,958
I KNOW YOU GOT ME.
I KNOW YOU GOT ME.
403
00:15:16,002 --> 00:15:18,265
WE'LL TAKE THAT.
YOUR MONEY'S GOOD.
404
00:15:18,308 --> 00:15:21,137
LET'S GO.
LET'S GO, BOYS.
405
00:15:33,193 --> 00:15:34,498
[CHEERING]
406
00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:35,499
WHAT'S GOOD?
407
00:15:35,543 --> 00:15:36,979
THAT'S WHAT
I'M TALKING ABOUT.
408
00:15:37,023 --> 00:15:39,286
THAT'S WHAT I'M
TALKING ABOUT!
409
00:15:39,329 --> 00:15:40,983
PLAY SOME "D."
410
00:15:41,027 --> 00:15:42,854
I KNOW
YOU GOT ME.
411
00:15:42,898 --> 00:15:44,900
I'M TALKING.
412
00:15:50,514 --> 00:15:51,994
YO! HOLD UP!
413
00:15:52,038 --> 00:15:54,562
YO! WHAT ARE YOU
DOING, MAN?
414
00:15:54,605 --> 00:15:57,913
YOU CAN'T FOUL ME
LIKE THAT!
415
00:15:59,349 --> 00:16:01,047
WHAT, BABY? WHAT?
416
00:16:01,090 --> 00:16:01,961
WHAT?
417
00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:04,876
[ALL SHOUTING]
418
00:16:07,183 --> 00:16:07,967
KEEP WALKING!
419
00:16:08,010 --> 00:16:09,359
WE'RE THE REAL
WARRIORS!
420
00:16:09,403 --> 00:16:11,274
YOU GO PLAY BALL WITH
THOSE PIMPIN' PUNKS!
421
00:16:11,318 --> 00:16:13,450
AND LEAVE YOUR GHETTO PASS
ON THE WAY OUT!
422
00:16:13,494 --> 00:16:16,149
I SWEAR. I NEVER
BEEN NO SUCKER, MAN.
423
00:16:16,192 --> 00:16:18,368
SO WHAT, MAN?
LET'S GO.
424
00:16:18,412 --> 00:16:21,806
YO, TODD ANDERSEN.
MY MAIN MAN.
425
00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:25,854
HOLLER AT YOUR BOY.
IT'S BLING, BABY.
426
00:16:26,159 --> 00:16:29,858
WAIT. DID HE JUST HIT ME
WITH THE HEAD NOD?
427
00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:30,990
YEAH.
428
00:16:31,033 --> 00:16:32,513
HE DIDN'T JUST HIT ME
WITH THE HEAD NOD?
429
00:16:32,556 --> 00:16:33,993
HE STRAIGHT
DISSED YOU.
430
00:16:34,036 --> 00:16:34,863
I TOLD Y'ALL
431
00:16:34,906 --> 00:16:36,343
HE DIDN'T KNOW
TODD ANDERSEN.
432
00:16:36,386 --> 00:16:38,084
CAN WE HAVE
OUR SNEAKERS BACK?
433
00:16:38,127 --> 00:16:42,523
THEY'RE MY SNEAKERS NOW.
GET THE SNEAKERS, WHEEZE.
434
00:16:42,566 --> 00:16:45,787
YEAH.
THE SNEAKERS.
435
00:16:54,535 --> 00:16:56,537
[GROANS]
436
00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:05,720
GOOD EVENING, MADAM.
437
00:17:05,762 --> 00:17:08,069
A SPOT OF TEA?
438
00:17:09,115 --> 00:17:11,377
JOJO!
439
00:17:11,421 --> 00:17:12,378
JOJO!
440
00:17:12,422 --> 00:17:13,944
WHAT'S WRONG, BABY?
441
00:17:13,989 --> 00:17:16,078
JOJO, WHAT'S THIS WHITE MAN
DOING IN MY HOUSE?
442
00:17:16,122 --> 00:17:19,212
JEEVES? HEY, HE'S
A GIFT FROM TODD.
443
00:17:19,255 --> 00:17:22,476
AND THAT'S NOT ALL.
COME SEE.
444
00:17:22,519 --> 00:17:24,913
WHAT THE HELL?
445
00:17:24,955 --> 00:17:26,784
AND HE GOT US
A LARGE-SCREEN TV
446
00:17:26,828 --> 00:17:29,918
WITH SURROUND SOUND
AND A PICTURE IN A PICTURE.
447
00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:32,486
HEY, I CAN WATCH
SANFORD AND SON
448
00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:35,315
AND TODD PLAY BALL
AT THE SAME TIME.
449
00:17:35,358 --> 00:17:37,099
WHAT IS THAT SMELL?
450
00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:39,101
NECK BONES
AND COLLARD GREENS,
451
00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:40,537
PER MR. ANDERSEN'S
REQUEST.
452
00:17:40,581 --> 00:17:43,105
MAY I BE OF SERVICE
TO YOU, MADAM?
453
00:17:43,149 --> 00:17:46,413
MADAM?
YOU DON'T KNOW ME.
454
00:17:46,456 --> 00:17:48,589
MY NAME IS EMMA,
455
00:17:48,632 --> 00:17:51,113
LADY EM,
OR MRS. ANDERSEN, OK?
456
00:17:51,157 --> 00:17:52,854
YOU JUST STAY OUT
OF MY WAY.
457
00:17:52,897 --> 00:17:55,291
AND MOST IMPORTANTLY,
STAY OUT OF MY KITCHEN!
458
00:17:55,335 --> 00:17:56,553
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT
459
00:17:56,597 --> 00:17:58,686
NO NECK BONES
AND COLLARD GREENS.
460
00:17:58,729 --> 00:18:01,341
AS YOU WISH,
MADAM LADY EM.
461
00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:02,603
GOD, THIS IS INSANE.
462
00:18:02,646 --> 00:18:05,345
AND WHY IS IT
SO COLD IN HERE?
463
00:18:05,388 --> 00:18:08,957
HEY, OUR BRAND-NEW
INDUSTRIAL AIR CONDITIONER.
464
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,481
HEY, EMMA, WE DON'T
HAVE TO EVER STICK
465
00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:14,441
TO THE PLASTIC
ON THE FURNITURE AGAIN.
466
00:18:14,484 --> 00:18:16,269
MR. JOJO, SIR.
467
00:18:16,312 --> 00:18:17,400
WHOA!
468
00:18:17,444 --> 00:18:20,403
NECK BONES AND COLLARD
GREENS ARE SERVED.
469
00:18:20,447 --> 00:18:22,144
THANK YOU, JEEVES.
470
00:18:22,188 --> 00:18:24,059
JUST FIND ME
SOME HOT SAUCE,
471
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,148
AND I'LL BE WITH YOU
IN A SECOND.
472
00:18:26,192 --> 00:18:28,150
TABASCO
OR RED ROOSTER, SIR?
473
00:18:28,194 --> 00:18:31,066
WELL, HOW ABOUT
A PINCH OF EACH?
474
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,154
YES, SIR.
475
00:18:32,198 --> 00:18:36,637
WELL...HA HA HA!
A PINCH OF EACH.
476
00:18:38,204 --> 00:18:40,119
[BRITTANY SHRIEKS]
477
00:18:40,162 --> 00:18:42,251
THESE ARE MY FLOWERS.
THESE ARE MINE.
478
00:18:42,295 --> 00:18:44,688
THESE ARE MY FLOWERS.
THEY'RE MY FLOWERS.
479
00:18:44,732 --> 00:18:46,212
THIS IS MY HOUSE!
MY HOUSE!
480
00:18:46,255 --> 00:18:47,952
THIS IS GREAT.
I'LL TAKE IT.
481
00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:50,999
I'LL TAKE IT.
I'LL TAKE IT.
482
00:18:51,042 --> 00:18:52,131
THIS IS SO EXCITING!
483
00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:53,654
YOUR PARENTS ARE GONNA
LOVE THIS HOUSE.
484
00:18:53,697 --> 00:18:56,483
THEY'RE GONNA BE SO HAPPY
THAT YOU'RE FINALLY MOVING OUT.
485
00:18:56,526 --> 00:18:58,572
MWAH! WHOO!
486
00:18:58,615 --> 00:19:01,662
YES! WHOO!
487
00:19:02,358 --> 00:19:06,406
YEAH. I'M SURE
MY MOM'S GONNA BE ECSTATIC
488
00:19:06,449 --> 00:19:08,625
ABOUT ME MOVING OUT.
489
00:19:08,669 --> 00:19:11,062
[SIGHS]
490
00:19:11,106 --> 00:19:13,674
[DOORBELL RINGS]
491
00:19:16,372 --> 00:19:18,635
HA! THERE'S MY BOY!
492
00:19:18,679 --> 00:19:19,984
UP! AAH!
493
00:19:20,028 --> 00:19:21,334
DAMN, YOU GOT BIG.
494
00:19:21,377 --> 00:19:24,032
HEY, LOOK, THANKS
FOR THE JACOB, BIG PIMPIN'.
495
00:19:24,075 --> 00:19:25,381
NO PROBLEM, DAD.
496
00:19:25,425 --> 00:19:27,209
AND HOW ARE YOU, LOVE?
497
00:19:27,253 --> 00:19:30,081
OH, I'M FINE.
HOW ARE YOU?
498
00:19:30,125 --> 00:19:31,170
MWAH! MWAH!
499
00:19:31,213 --> 00:19:34,651
DID TODD TELL YOU
ABOUT THE HOUSE?
500
00:19:34,695 --> 00:19:36,566
WHAT HOUSE?
501
00:19:36,610 --> 00:19:39,352
OH. WELL, TODD GOT, UM...
502
00:19:39,395 --> 00:19:41,441
US A HOUSE.
503
00:19:41,484 --> 00:19:43,356
IT'S BEAUTIFUL.
504
00:19:43,399 --> 00:19:46,054
JOJO, THIS IS
GOING TOO FAST.
505
00:19:46,097 --> 00:19:47,360
NO, NO, NO.
NOW, JOJO.
506
00:19:47,403 --> 00:19:49,057
IT'S GOING
TOO FAST FOR ME.
507
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:51,320
THIS IS ALL GOING
TOO FAST FOR ME!
508
00:19:51,364 --> 00:19:52,843
BABY, THE BOY
IS GROWN.
509
00:19:52,887 --> 00:19:54,367
WE KNEW THIS WAS
GONNA HAPPEN.
510
00:19:54,410 --> 00:19:57,021
AND BESIDES, YOU WOULDN'T WANT
ONE OF THEM HOODS OUT THERE
511
00:19:57,065 --> 00:19:59,850
TAKING A SHOT AT HIM
OUT OF JEALOUSY, RIGHT?
512
00:19:59,894 --> 00:20:00,982
UH-UH. UH-UH.
513
00:20:01,025 --> 00:20:02,418
WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT HERE.
COME OFF HIM.
514
00:20:02,462 --> 00:20:07,554
GO IN THERE. GO IN THERE.
I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.
515
00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:09,991
Jojo: AH...GOD.
516
00:20:10,034 --> 00:20:12,559
I DON'T KNOW, MAN.
517
00:20:12,602 --> 00:20:14,604
[DOOR CLOSES]
518
00:20:14,952 --> 00:20:16,650
SON, YOU NEED
TO SLOW DOWN.
519
00:20:16,693 --> 00:20:18,652
WHAT? YOU DON'T LIKE
ALL THE GIFTS?
520
00:20:18,695 --> 00:20:21,307
THAT'S NOT THE POINT.
I'M CONCERNED
521
00:20:21,350 --> 00:20:23,787
ABOUT HOW YOU'RE
SPENDING YOUR MONEY.
522
00:20:23,831 --> 00:20:25,136
MAMA, I'M GONNA BE FINE.
523
00:20:25,180 --> 00:20:26,703
I JUST GOT OFF
THE PHONE WITH WES.
524
00:20:26,747 --> 00:20:28,488
HE SAID I'LL BE WORTH
MORE THAN $50 MILLION
525
00:20:28,531 --> 00:20:30,664
WHEN MY CONTRACT GOES THROUGH
AND THE SEASON STARTS.
526
00:20:30,707 --> 00:20:32,796
"WHEN."
DON'T YOU MEAN "IF"?
527
00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:35,016
WHAT IF YOU
BREAK A LEG?
528
00:20:35,059 --> 00:20:37,845
YOU THINK IT'S GONNA
BE ALL GOOD THEN?
529
00:20:37,888 --> 00:20:39,716
AND WHAT'S THIS GIRL
530
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:43,764
TALKING ABOUT
"BOUGHT USA HOUSE"?
531
00:20:43,807 --> 00:20:45,331
THAT GIRL
AIN'T YOUR WIFE.
532
00:20:45,374 --> 00:20:47,985
I DON'T THINK
SHE MEANT IT LIKE THAT.
533
00:20:48,029 --> 00:20:52,251
YEAH. WELL, WHAT
EXACTLY DID SHE MEAN
534
00:20:52,294 --> 00:20:54,165
BY "US"?
535
00:20:54,209 --> 00:20:57,778
YOU PLANNING ON
MARRYING THAT GIRL?
536
00:20:57,821 --> 00:21:00,520
HA HA HA. OH...
537
00:21:00,563 --> 00:21:02,870
I DON'T...
I DON'T KNOW.
538
00:21:02,913 --> 00:21:04,698
IT'S ALL GOOD.
WE...WE...
539
00:21:04,741 --> 00:21:07,657
WE JUST LIKE...
WE KICKIN' IT, LIKE...
540
00:21:07,701 --> 00:21:09,137
KICKIN' IT.
541
00:21:09,180 --> 00:21:11,270
WHAT'S
"KICKIN' IT" MEAN?
542
00:21:11,313 --> 00:21:13,315
YOUR DADDY AND I HAVE
BEEN MARRIED 25 YEARS.
543
00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:15,012
WE AIN'T NEVER
KICKED IT.
544
00:21:15,056 --> 00:21:16,362
SO, WHAT YOU
WANT ME TO DO, MA?
545
00:21:16,405 --> 00:21:17,711
YOU DO WHAT
YOU WANT TO DO.
546
00:21:17,754 --> 00:21:18,973
YOU'RE A GROWN MAN.
547
00:21:19,016 --> 00:21:20,322
I JUST WANTED TO GO
ON RECORD SAYING
548
00:21:20,366 --> 00:21:24,239
THAT I DON'T
LIKE IT.
549
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:32,639
COME ON, MA.
550
00:21:32,682 --> 00:21:35,859
MOMMY, YOU'RE STILL
MY NUMBER-ONE LADY.
551
00:21:35,903 --> 00:21:37,252
THAT'S NEVER
GONNA CHANGE.
552
00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:39,080
DON'T COME OVER HERE
WITH ALL THAT.
553
00:21:39,123 --> 00:21:40,647
MA, COME ON.
OK, LOOK, LOOK.
554
00:21:40,690 --> 00:21:42,039
LET ME MAKE IT
UP TO YOU.
555
00:21:42,083 --> 00:21:43,345
LET ME MAKE IT
UP TO YOU.
556
00:21:43,389 --> 00:21:46,479
WHY DON'T YOU DECORATE
MY NEW HOUSE?
557
00:21:46,522 --> 00:21:48,829
COME ON. PLEASE.
PLEASE.
558
00:21:48,872 --> 00:21:50,483
NOW, WAIT A MINUTE.
WAIT A MINUTE.
559
00:21:50,526 --> 00:21:52,006
WAIT A MINUTE.
THAT'S AN IDEA.
560
00:21:52,049 --> 00:21:53,573
OK. YOU KNOW
WHAT I'M SAYING?
561
00:21:53,616 --> 00:21:56,010
JUST DO IT
THE WAY YOU DO IT.
562
00:21:56,053 --> 00:21:57,751
YOU KNOW
HOW YOU DO, MA.
563
00:21:57,794 --> 00:21:59,143
COME ON, MA.
564
00:21:59,187 --> 00:22:02,364
I DON'T WANT THAT NASTY GIRL
HANGING AROUND UP THERE.
565
00:22:03,713 --> 00:22:05,889
ALL RIGHT. COME HERE.
566
00:22:05,933 --> 00:22:08,544
HA HA. WITH YOUR
BIG OLD SELF.
567
00:22:08,588 --> 00:22:10,590
AH, I LOVE YOU,
MOMMY.
568
00:22:10,633 --> 00:22:13,375
I LOVE YOU, TOO, BABY.
569
00:22:13,419 --> 00:22:15,334
MMM...
570
00:22:23,559 --> 00:22:26,823
WHAT DID I TELL YOU
ABOUT COMING AROUND HERE? HUH?
571
00:22:26,867 --> 00:22:28,564
I TOLD YOU,
DON'T COME AROUND HERE
572
00:22:28,608 --> 00:22:29,696
BREAKING THE RULES, RIGHT?
573
00:22:29,739 --> 00:22:32,742
I MEAN, CAN'T YOU READ?
THE SIGN SAYS...
574
00:22:32,786 --> 00:22:34,788
"NO SOLICITING," OK?
575
00:22:34,831 --> 00:22:36,746
NOW, GO AND SELL YOUR COOKIES
SOMEWHERE ELSE.
576
00:22:36,790 --> 00:22:40,489
WHAT IS WITH THESE KIDS?
THEY PUSH ME. THEY PUSH ME.
577
00:22:40,533 --> 00:22:41,577
WAIT.
578
00:22:41,621 --> 00:22:44,406
WHAT YOU GOT?
SLIM MINTS RIGHT THERE?
579
00:22:44,450 --> 00:22:47,453
LET ME GET A BOX
OF THEM SLIM MINTS.
580
00:22:49,846 --> 00:22:52,153
ALL RIGHT. GO. GO ON.
GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE.
581
00:22:52,196 --> 00:22:54,024
I DON'T WANT
TO CATCH YOU AROUND HERE
582
00:22:54,068 --> 00:22:57,158
TILL YOU COME BACK
WITH SOME SHORTBREADS.
583
00:22:57,201 --> 00:22:59,769
SCOURGE OF THE NATION.
584
00:23:02,076 --> 00:23:07,603
♪ WE FINALLY GOT
A PIECE OF THE PIE ♪
585
00:23:07,647 --> 00:23:09,649
[HORNS HONK]
586
00:23:09,692 --> 00:23:11,825
UH-UH. WHAT?
587
00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:16,612
HEY! HEY, WAIT!
COME BACK HERE!
588
00:23:16,656 --> 00:23:21,008
COME BACK HERE!
DON'T MAKE ME BREAK THE GLASS.
589
00:23:24,664 --> 00:23:26,709
[DOG BARKING]
590
00:23:37,938 --> 00:23:40,462
[CHILDREN SCREAMING]
591
00:23:45,075 --> 00:23:49,950
♪ WE FINALLY GOT
A PIECE OF THE PIE ♪
592
00:24:04,617 --> 00:24:06,009
WHOO-HOO!
593
00:24:06,053 --> 00:24:08,751
WHAT IS THIS, SON--
A HOTEL OR A HOUSE?
594
00:24:08,795 --> 00:24:10,361
A HOUSE.
A HOUSE.
595
00:24:10,405 --> 00:24:12,363
BUT IT HAS
7 BEDROOMS
596
00:24:12,407 --> 00:24:14,365
AND 10
BATHROOMS! WHOO!
597
00:24:14,409 --> 00:24:15,671
10 BATHROOMS?
598
00:24:15,715 --> 00:24:17,847
WHY YOU NEED 10 BATHROOMS?
YOU ONLY GOT ONE ASS.
599
00:24:17,891 --> 00:24:19,153
SORRY.
JOJO.
600
00:24:19,196 --> 00:24:21,285
TODD, HONEY, YOU SURE
THIS IS THE HOUSE FOR YOU?
601
00:24:21,329 --> 00:24:23,766
I MEAN, MAYBE YOU NEED
TO LOOK A LITTLE LONGER,
602
00:24:23,810 --> 00:24:27,204
FIND SOMETHING A LITTLE CLOSER
TO YOUR PARENTS.
603
00:24:27,248 --> 00:24:29,424
NO, NO, NO. THIS IS IT.
604
00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:30,947
THIS IS RIGHT.
605
00:24:30,991 --> 00:24:34,168
THIS IS SO RIGHT.
606
00:24:34,211 --> 00:24:35,561
[SHRIEKS]
607
00:24:35,604 --> 00:24:37,519
COME ON.
LET'S GO INSIDE.
608
00:24:37,563 --> 00:24:38,999
LET'S LOOK
AT IT. COME ON!
609
00:24:39,042 --> 00:24:40,827
HEY, HEY, HEY!
WHAT YOU GOT, CHAMP?
610
00:24:40,870 --> 00:24:42,393
COME ON. OW! OW! OK.
611
00:24:42,437 --> 00:24:45,179
NOT THE FACE.
NOT THE FACE.
612
00:24:45,222 --> 00:24:49,531
OH, MY. COME ON.
COME ON, GUINEVERE.
613
00:24:49,575 --> 00:24:51,577
COME ON!
614
00:24:51,620 --> 00:24:53,753
AH! AH!
615
00:24:53,796 --> 00:24:55,711
HONEY! CALL SECURITY!
616
00:24:55,755 --> 00:24:59,585
I JUST SAW SOME NEGROES!
617
00:24:59,628 --> 00:25:01,021
WHAT DID YOU SAY?
618
00:25:01,064 --> 00:25:03,066
I SAID I JUST
SAW A GANG...
619
00:25:03,110 --> 00:25:04,590
YOU KNOW...YO!
620
00:25:04,633 --> 00:25:07,070
OF NEGROES
ACROSS THE STREET.
621
00:25:07,114 --> 00:25:08,245
NEGROES?
622
00:25:08,289 --> 00:25:09,420
YES!
623
00:25:09,464 --> 00:25:11,248
AND I THINK THEY WERE
HURTING A WHITE MAN.
624
00:25:11,292 --> 00:25:13,424
GOOD LORD. I'LL CALL
SECURITY AT ONCE.
625
00:25:13,468 --> 00:25:14,295
OH.
626
00:25:14,338 --> 00:25:16,340
HOLD ME, HOLSTEAD.
HOLD ME.
627
00:25:16,384 --> 00:25:17,559
SECURITY.
628
00:25:17,603 --> 00:25:18,865
HOLD ME.
629
00:25:18,908 --> 00:25:22,172
OH, YES, JUDGE CROWLEY.
I UNDERSTAND COMPLETELY.
630
00:25:22,216 --> 00:25:23,565
I AM ON IT.
I'M ON IT.
631
00:25:23,609 --> 00:25:27,003
I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT.
NOPE, DON'T WORRY ABOUT A THING.
632
00:25:27,047 --> 00:25:28,570
ALL RIGHT.
633
00:25:28,614 --> 00:25:30,572
DAMN IT.
634
00:25:31,094 --> 00:25:33,053
TAKE CARE OF MY BABY
FIRST, THOUGH.
635
00:25:33,096 --> 00:25:35,272
FIRST GOT TO TAKE CARE
OF MY BABY.
636
00:25:35,316 --> 00:25:38,711
HA HA HA!
HEY, THIS IS NICE!
637
00:25:38,754 --> 00:25:43,454
WHOO! DAMN.
THIS IS BIG!
638
00:25:43,498 --> 00:25:44,847
WHOO! HEY!
639
00:25:44,891 --> 00:25:47,154
I KNOW WHERE WE'RE GONNA BE
HAVING OUR NEXT COOKOUT.
640
00:25:47,197 --> 00:25:48,372
JOJO,
COME ON NOW.
641
00:25:48,416 --> 00:25:49,983
THE BOY JUST
MOVED IN HERE.
642
00:25:50,026 --> 00:25:51,158
COME ON NOW.
643
00:25:51,201 --> 00:25:53,552
IT'S COOL, MA.
THIS HOUSE IS FOR ALL OF US.
644
00:25:53,595 --> 00:25:55,554
HAVING THE COOKOUT HERE
WOULD BE A GREAT IDEA.
645
00:25:55,597 --> 00:25:58,078
MATTER OF FACT,
LET'S HAVE IT THIS SATURDAY.
646
00:25:58,121 --> 00:26:00,123
EXCU--EXCUSE ME.
647
00:26:00,167 --> 00:26:03,083
IS THAT
A PURPLE DIAMOND?
648
00:26:03,126 --> 00:26:06,826
OH. WHY, YES, IT IS.
YOU GUYS LIKE?
649
00:26:06,869 --> 00:26:09,698
IT'S SOMETHING THAT ME
AND TODD PICKED UP.
650
00:26:09,742 --> 00:26:10,960
OH, YOU GUYS, LOOK.
651
00:26:11,004 --> 00:26:12,353
I HAVE MATCHING
EARRINGS, TOO.
652
00:26:12,396 --> 00:26:16,139
OH, YEAH. YEAH,
THEY'RE REALLY NICE.
653
00:26:16,183 --> 00:26:17,967
TODD, COME ON.
WE GOT TO TALK.
654
00:26:18,011 --> 00:26:20,143
OK. MA, LOOK, YOU'RE
IN CHARGE, RIGHT?
655
00:26:20,187 --> 00:26:21,231
DO YOUR THING.
656
00:26:21,275 --> 00:26:23,625
THE TIP FROM THE CROWLEYS
WAS CORRECT.
657
00:26:23,669 --> 00:26:27,237
I HAVE A VISUAL
ON THE SUSPECTS.
658
00:26:27,281 --> 00:26:28,412
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
659
00:26:28,456 --> 00:26:29,849
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
WHAT AM I DOING?
660
00:26:29,892 --> 00:26:32,547
THIS HOUSE, THE CARS,
THE JEWELRY, THE BRITTANY.
661
00:26:32,591 --> 00:26:34,897
YOU CAN'T AFFORD
ANY OF THIS STUFF.
662
00:26:34,941 --> 00:26:36,203
WES, WES, WES, WES.
663
00:26:36,246 --> 00:26:38,161
I JUST GOT
$30 MILLION, MAN.
664
00:26:38,205 --> 00:26:39,641
I'M RICH!
665
00:26:39,685 --> 00:26:40,773
IT'S $30 MILLION,
666
00:26:40,816 --> 00:26:42,775
BUT IT'S $30 MILLION
SPREAD OVER 6 YEARS.
667
00:26:42,818 --> 00:26:44,559
YOU HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN
A PAYCHECK YET.
668
00:26:44,603 --> 00:26:46,474
THE SEASON DOESN'T START
FOR ANOTHER 3 MONTHS.
669
00:26:46,517 --> 00:26:50,521
HEY, I AM NOT FRONTING YOU
THE CASH FOR THIS STUFF, OK?
670
00:26:50,565 --> 00:26:53,307
HA HA. WES, WHY ARE
YOU BUGGING, MAN?
671
00:26:53,350 --> 00:26:54,525
LET ME ENJOY
THE MOMENT.
672
00:26:54,569 --> 00:26:57,267
ENJOY THE MOMENT,
BUT RETURN THIS CRAP.
673
00:26:57,311 --> 00:26:58,617
YEAH. AT LEAST UNTIL
674
00:26:58,660 --> 00:27:00,053
I CAN OFFICIALLY LOCK IN
SOME ENDORSEMENTS FOR YOU.
675
00:27:00,096 --> 00:27:02,011
PEOPLE JUST SAW ME
ON NATIONAL TV
676
00:27:02,055 --> 00:27:03,665
GETTING DRAFTED
THE OTHER DAY.
677
00:27:03,709 --> 00:27:04,884
NOW THEY'RE SUPPOSED
TO SEE ME RETURNING
678
00:27:04,927 --> 00:27:06,102
THOUSAND OF DOLLARS'
WORTH OF STUFF
679
00:27:06,146 --> 00:27:07,538
LIKE I SMOKED UP
ALL MY MONEY?
680
00:27:07,582 --> 00:27:08,888
I'M NOT
A CRACKHEAD, WES.
681
00:27:08,931 --> 00:27:10,846
YOU NEED TO GET ME SOME
ENDORSEMENTS OR SOMETHING.
682
00:27:10,890 --> 00:27:12,152
ALL RIGHT,
I'LL GET THEM,
683
00:27:12,195 --> 00:27:13,632
BUT JUST HOLD OFF
FOR A WHILE, OK?
684
00:27:13,675 --> 00:27:15,764
I MEAN, JUST THINK
ABOUT IT, PLEASE.
685
00:27:15,808 --> 00:27:17,461
YO! WHO THAT?
686
00:27:17,505 --> 00:27:20,073
EXCUSE ME.
CAN I HELP YOU?
687
00:27:26,035 --> 00:27:27,123
OK, OK, OK, BUDDY.
688
00:27:27,167 --> 00:27:29,691
JUST REMAIN CALM.
JUST CALM DOWN.
689
00:27:29,735 --> 00:27:31,040
SUBJECT IS BEING
BELLIGERENT.
690
00:27:31,084 --> 00:27:33,216
MAY HAVE TO SUBDUE
WITH CHOKE HOLD. REQUEST BACKUP.
691
00:27:33,260 --> 00:27:34,565
YO, WHAT THE HELL?
692
00:27:34,609 --> 00:27:35,523
ARE YOU OK, SIR?
693
00:27:35,566 --> 00:27:36,916
JUST BLINK ONCE
IF YES.
694
00:27:36,959 --> 00:27:38,482
I'M FINE.
I'M FINE.
695
00:27:38,526 --> 00:27:41,050
IS HE FORCING YOU
TO SAY THAT?
696
00:27:41,094 --> 00:27:41,964
NO.
697
00:27:42,008 --> 00:27:43,226
I LIVE HERE.
THIS IS MY HOUSE.
698
00:27:43,270 --> 00:27:47,404
YEAH, RIGHT, YOU LIVE HERE.
NEGRO, PLEASE.
699
00:27:47,448 --> 00:27:48,710
LOOK, I GOT KEYS--
700
00:27:48,754 --> 00:27:49,537
HOLD IT!
701
00:27:49,580 --> 00:27:50,669
DON'T! DON'T!
702
00:27:50,712 --> 00:27:52,105
I'LL SPRAY YOUR ASS.
703
00:27:52,148 --> 00:27:53,715
PLEASE DON'T
SPRAY HIS ASS.
704
00:27:53,759 --> 00:27:55,891
LADY, LADY, THIS
IS HIS HOUSE.
705
00:27:55,935 --> 00:27:57,588
THIS IS
TODD ANDERSEN,
706
00:27:57,632 --> 00:27:58,981
NEW JERSEY'S
NUMBER-ONE PICK.
707
00:27:59,025 --> 00:28:01,462
I'LL LIGHT HIS ASS UP.
LET ME LOOK AT YOU.
708
00:28:01,505 --> 00:28:03,725
OH, THAT IS YOU, HUH?
709
00:28:03,769 --> 00:28:04,552
YEAH.
710
00:28:04,595 --> 00:28:06,510
YOU LOOK YOUNGER
IN PERSON.
711
00:28:06,554 --> 00:28:07,598
HOW YOU DOING?
712
00:28:07,642 --> 00:28:08,861
GOOD. I'M GOOD,
ACTUALLY.
713
00:28:08,904 --> 00:28:10,079
WELL, LOOK HERE.
WE DON'T PLAY
714
00:28:10,123 --> 00:28:11,602
THAT GHETTO NONSENSE
AROUND HERE.
715
00:28:11,646 --> 00:28:14,562
NO CHICKEN HEADS,
NO HOOD RATS,
716
00:28:14,605 --> 00:28:16,433
NO 40-OUNCERS,
717
00:28:16,477 --> 00:28:18,522
NO RIMS-ON SPINNERS,
718
00:28:18,566 --> 00:28:19,654
AND NO LOUD MUSIC.
719
00:28:19,698 --> 00:28:21,830
THIS AIN'T NO LUDACRIS
VIDEO SET.
720
00:28:21,874 --> 00:28:24,180
AND KEEP THEM HO'S AWAY.
721
00:28:24,224 --> 00:28:26,530
YOU DON'T HAVE
ANY CHICKEN HEADS
722
00:28:26,574 --> 00:28:27,749
OR HO'S, DO YOU?
723
00:28:27,793 --> 00:28:30,012
NOW YOU WANT TO MOVE
TO YOUR PARENTS' HOUSE?
724
00:28:30,056 --> 00:28:31,448
IT'S LOOKING A LOT
BETTER, ISN'T IT?
725
00:28:31,492 --> 00:28:34,495
THIS IS WHAT YOU GOT TO
DEAL WITH OUT IN THE...
726
00:28:34,538 --> 00:28:36,758
OH, SHE GOT THE BIBLE.
727
00:28:37,628 --> 00:28:38,760
WHAT IS THIS?
728
00:28:38,804 --> 00:28:42,285
GARDEN RIDGE ESTATES
RULES AND REGULATIONS.
729
00:28:42,329 --> 00:28:43,504
ALL 4 VOLUMES.
730
00:28:43,547 --> 00:28:45,288
I SUGGEST
YOU LEARN THEM.
731
00:28:45,332 --> 00:28:48,639
YOU ALL RIGHT, SIR?
I'M SORRY TO STARTLE YOU.
732
00:28:48,683 --> 00:28:50,163
YOU HAVE
A LOVELY DAY.
733
00:28:50,206 --> 00:28:51,599
YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY.
734
00:28:51,642 --> 00:28:53,819
THANKS
FOR ALL YOUR HELP.
735
00:28:55,255 --> 00:28:58,780
I GOT MY EYE ON YOU.
736
00:29:01,957 --> 00:29:02,784
OOH...
737
00:29:02,828 --> 00:29:03,916
I STILL SEE YOU.
738
00:29:03,959 --> 00:29:05,047
YOU FEEL SAFE NOW?
739
00:29:05,091 --> 00:29:06,222
YEAH. I'M GREAT.
740
00:29:06,266 --> 00:29:07,484
COME ON NOW.
COME ON.
741
00:29:07,528 --> 00:29:08,790
BE CAREFUL WITH
THEM BOXES NOW, BABY.
742
00:29:08,834 --> 00:29:11,532
YO, MA, THIS IS DOPE!
YOU DID YOUR THING IN HERE!
743
00:29:11,575 --> 00:29:12,881
YOU LIKE IT, BABY?
744
00:29:12,925 --> 00:29:14,665
YEAH, I LIKE IT!
THIS IS CRAZY!
745
00:29:14,709 --> 00:29:16,015
I'M GLAD
YOU LIKE IT.
746
00:29:16,058 --> 00:29:17,799
COME GIVE
YOUR MAMA A KISS.
747
00:29:17,843 --> 00:29:18,974
WHOO!
748
00:29:19,018 --> 00:29:19,888
MWAH!
749
00:29:19,932 --> 00:29:21,237
THANK YOU,
MOMMY.
750
00:29:21,281 --> 00:29:22,456
LOOK HERE.
751
00:29:22,499 --> 00:29:23,979
YOU SEE HOW YOUR MAMA
PUT ALL YOUR PICTURES
752
00:29:24,023 --> 00:29:25,154
UNDER THE GLASS?
753
00:29:25,198 --> 00:29:27,156
THIS WAY, YOU CAN LOOK
AT ALL YOUR PICTURES
754
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:29,158
AT ONE TIME.
755
00:29:29,202 --> 00:29:30,551
CHECK THIS OUT, MAN.
756
00:29:30,594 --> 00:29:33,554
OK, LOOK. THIS IS MY COUSIN
LEROY RIGHT HERE, RIGHT?
757
00:29:33,597 --> 00:29:34,990
HE FAILED THE BAR
9 TIMES.
758
00:29:35,034 --> 00:29:36,818
STILL GIVES
LEGAL ADVICE.
759
00:29:36,862 --> 00:29:37,993
RIGHT.
760
00:29:38,037 --> 00:29:40,430
OH, LOOK. AND THERE GOES
JASPER AND JEROME.
761
00:29:40,474 --> 00:29:42,519
THEY ARE REAL COUNTRY.
762
00:29:42,563 --> 00:29:44,739
WHO'S THIS LITTLE
GIRL RIGHT HERE
763
00:29:44,783 --> 00:29:46,393
WITH THE FUNNY-
LOOKING TEETH?
764
00:29:46,436 --> 00:29:49,048
OH, THAT'S
MY BEST FRIEND--BECKY.
765
00:29:49,091 --> 00:29:50,353
YEAH.
OH, THAT'S BECKY.
766
00:29:50,397 --> 00:29:52,703
AND LOOK HERE.
NOW THAT'S THEM
767
00:29:52,747 --> 00:29:54,227
IN THE TUB.
768
00:29:54,270 --> 00:29:56,229
WHOA. CHILL.
WE WAS JUST COOL.
769
00:29:56,272 --> 00:29:57,665
IT WASN'T EVEN
LIKE THAT.
770
00:29:57,708 --> 00:30:00,711
YO, BUT I WONDER IF THOSE
BRACES EVER FIXED HER TEETH.
771
00:30:00,755 --> 00:30:02,104
YOU SEEN HER?
772
00:30:02,148 --> 00:30:03,366
WHY? SO BOTH OF YOU
773
00:30:03,410 --> 00:30:04,890
CAN TAKE A SPLISH-SPLASH
IN YOUR BRAND-NEW TUB?
774
00:30:04,933 --> 00:30:07,283
OH, COME ON, BABY.
IT WASN'T EVEN LIKE THAT.
775
00:30:07,327 --> 00:30:08,458
STOP. STOP. COME ON.
776
00:30:08,502 --> 00:30:09,982
COME ON NOW. THAT'S
ENOUGH OF ALL OF THAT.
777
00:30:10,025 --> 00:30:12,027
COME ON. WE'RE GOING
TO SEE THE BEDROOM.
778
00:30:12,071 --> 00:30:13,202
YOU, COME ON.
779
00:30:13,246 --> 00:30:15,552
MY OLD
BEDROOM SET!
780
00:30:15,596 --> 00:30:16,640
OH!
781
00:30:16,684 --> 00:30:18,294
YOUR MOTHER THOUGHT
IT MIGHT HELP EASE
782
00:30:18,338 --> 00:30:21,863
YOUR TRANSITION FROM MOVING
OUT OF THE HOUSE.
783
00:30:21,907 --> 00:30:23,560
THANK YOU, MOM.
784
00:30:23,604 --> 00:30:24,648
MWAH!
785
00:30:24,692 --> 00:30:25,867
OH, LOOK.
786
00:30:25,911 --> 00:30:27,564
LITTLE KIDDIE,
SPORTY...
787
00:30:27,608 --> 00:30:28,870
BED SHEETS. YAY!
788
00:30:28,914 --> 00:30:30,393
AIN'T THEY THE BOMB?
789
00:30:30,437 --> 00:30:31,699
MAYBE WE CAN
JUST WEAR
790
00:30:31,742 --> 00:30:33,396
THE MATCHING LITTLE
KIDDIE PAJAMAS
791
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:35,572
WITH IT, TOO.
792
00:30:35,616 --> 00:30:36,660
WHOO.
793
00:30:36,704 --> 00:30:40,055
I'D RATHER BE DEAD
THAN SLEEP IN THIS.
794
00:30:40,099 --> 00:30:42,275
VROOM!
795
00:30:45,887 --> 00:30:49,064
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
796
00:30:52,111 --> 00:30:52,981
HELLO.
797
00:30:53,025 --> 00:30:55,854
Wes: HEY, HONEY.
IS TODD THERE?
798
00:30:55,897 --> 00:30:57,856
TODD.
799
00:30:59,031 --> 00:31:00,249
TODD.
800
00:31:00,293 --> 00:31:02,251
[FARTING]
801
00:31:06,734 --> 00:31:08,214
TODD, GET UP!
802
00:31:08,257 --> 00:31:09,519
WHAT? WHAT?
803
00:31:09,563 --> 00:31:11,608
THE PHONE
IS FOR YOU.
804
00:31:11,652 --> 00:31:13,393
WHAT'S...HELLO.
805
00:31:13,436 --> 00:31:14,698
HEY, TODD.
IT'S ME--WES.
806
00:31:14,742 --> 00:31:16,657
YOU AWAKE, BUDDY?
I GOT SOME GOOD NEWS.
807
00:31:16,700 --> 00:31:18,615
COME ON. GET YOUR BUTT
OUT OF BED.
808
00:31:18,659 --> 00:31:20,008
WHAT'S UP, MAN?
809
00:31:20,052 --> 00:31:21,401
CYNTHIA PETERS, THE HEAD
OF STONE MOUNTAIN WIRELESS,
810
00:31:21,444 --> 00:31:23,925
IS INTERESTED IN MEETING YOU
FOR AN ENDORSEMENT.
811
00:31:23,969 --> 00:31:24,926
FOR REAL?
812
00:31:24,970 --> 00:31:26,319
YES! SHE WANTS
TO MEET YOU A.S.A.P.
813
00:31:26,362 --> 00:31:27,668
WHAT? ARE YOU
TOO BUSY?
814
00:31:27,711 --> 00:31:29,235
NO, NO, NO, NO.
I'M AVAILABLE.
815
00:31:29,278 --> 00:31:31,063
I CAN DO IT.
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
816
00:31:31,106 --> 00:31:32,542
YES, I'M SERIOUS!
817
00:31:32,586 --> 00:31:34,022
I'M GONNA HAVE HER COME
BY YOUR HOUSE SATURDAY MORNING.
818
00:31:34,066 --> 00:31:35,937
YO, LISTEN, MAN.
WHENEVER SHE CAN DO IT,
819
00:31:35,981 --> 00:31:37,547
I'M HERE.
JUST DO IT.
820
00:31:37,591 --> 00:31:38,766
WE'LL DO THE MEETING
821
00:31:38,809 --> 00:31:40,420
FIRST THING SATURDAY MORNING
WITH MS. PETERS.
822
00:31:40,463 --> 00:31:41,987
THEN YOU HAVE THE REST
OF THE AFTERNOON
823
00:31:42,030 --> 00:31:43,292
FOR THE COOKOUT
WITH YOUR PARENTS.
824
00:31:43,336 --> 00:31:45,338
I'LL SEE YOU SATURDAY.
YOU'RE RICH! YOU'RE RICH!
825
00:31:45,381 --> 00:31:47,557
OK, BYE. BYE.
BABY, THAT WAS WES.
826
00:31:47,601 --> 00:31:49,124
STONE MOUNTAIN
WIRELESS
827
00:31:49,168 --> 00:31:51,387
IS CONSIDERING ME
AS A SPOKESPERSON
828
00:31:51,431 --> 00:31:53,824
FOR THEIR FAMILY
TIME CAMPAIGN.
829
00:31:53,868 --> 00:31:55,000
[SHRIEKS]
830
00:31:55,043 --> 00:31:56,349
OH, MAN!
831
00:31:56,392 --> 00:31:59,178
WHOO! ONE OF THE REPS
IS COMING OVER THIS SATURDAY
832
00:31:59,221 --> 00:32:01,397
TO MEET ME, BABY.
833
00:32:01,441 --> 00:32:03,225
OH.
834
00:32:07,142 --> 00:32:10,406
YO, WHAT DID YOU DO
WITH ALL MY MOM'S STUFF?
835
00:32:10,450 --> 00:32:11,451
OH, BABY, LOOK.
836
00:32:11,494 --> 00:32:12,931
EVERYTHING THAT
YOUR MOM TRIED TO DO
837
00:32:12,974 --> 00:32:14,454
WAS REALLY GREAT
AND EVERYTHING,
838
00:32:14,497 --> 00:32:15,977
BUT I JUST THINK
THAT IT WAS
839
00:32:16,021 --> 00:32:17,370
A LITTLE BIT
TOO DOWN-HOME,
840
00:32:17,413 --> 00:32:20,764
AND BABY, WHAT YOU NEED
IS A HIP, PROGRESSIVE IMAGE.
841
00:32:20,808 --> 00:32:21,809
FOCUS. FOCUS.
842
00:32:21,852 --> 00:32:23,593
HEY, DON'T WORRY
ABOUT THE HOUSE, OK?
843
00:32:23,637 --> 00:32:25,508
MS. PETERS IS GONNA
BE HERE ANY SECOND.
844
00:32:25,552 --> 00:32:27,380
YOU NEED TO SELL HER
ON YOU.
845
00:32:27,423 --> 00:32:28,990
ON YOU, BABE.
846
00:32:29,034 --> 00:32:30,731
OK, LOOK.
WHATEVER IT TAKES
847
00:32:30,774 --> 00:32:32,037
TO GET THIS DEAL.
848
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:33,560
BUT AS SOON AS SHE LEAVES,
I WANT ALL THIS STUFF
849
00:32:33,603 --> 00:32:35,562
BACK THE WAY IT WAS
BEFORE MY MOM GETS HERE.
850
00:32:35,605 --> 00:32:37,172
AND YOU MIGHT WANT
TO RETURN THIS.
851
00:32:37,216 --> 00:32:39,000
NO! THAT COCK COST ME
A LOT OF MONEY TO GET.
852
00:32:39,044 --> 00:32:41,655
YOU'VE GOT A GIANT COCK
IN YOUR KITCHEN.
853
00:32:41,698 --> 00:32:43,439
IT'S RIDICULOUS.
854
00:32:43,483 --> 00:32:46,051
BABY.
855
00:32:47,052 --> 00:32:48,096
I MISS YOU.
856
00:32:48,140 --> 00:32:50,446
I MISS YOU MORE.
857
00:32:50,490 --> 00:32:51,752
I MISS YOUMORE.
858
00:32:51,795 --> 00:32:56,539
LIL DEE?
WHO THE HELL IS LIL DEE?
859
00:32:56,583 --> 00:32:59,803
[CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
860
00:32:59,847 --> 00:33:02,981
[SINGING]
861
00:33:15,994 --> 00:33:16,864
WHAT'S GOOD, CHIEF?
862
00:33:16,907 --> 00:33:17,996
WHAT WAS THAT--
PUBLIC ENEMY?
863
00:33:18,039 --> 00:33:20,694
ARE YOU ADDRESSING ME,
YOUNG MAN?
864
00:33:20,737 --> 00:33:26,395
IF YOU ARE, IT IS
JUDGE HOLSTEAD CROWLEY,
865
00:33:26,439 --> 00:33:27,788
NOT CHIEF.
866
00:33:27,831 --> 00:33:29,485
HEY, MAN,
I'M TODD ANDERSEN,
867
00:33:29,529 --> 00:33:31,661
YOUR NEW NEIGHBOR.
GOOD TO SEE
868
00:33:31,705 --> 00:33:34,273
ANOTHER BROTHER IN
THE NEIGHBORHOOD, MAN.
869
00:33:34,316 --> 00:33:35,230
BROTHER?
870
00:33:35,274 --> 00:33:37,667
YOU'RE NOT ANY
RELATIONS OF MINE.
871
00:33:37,711 --> 00:33:39,017
O...K.
872
00:33:39,060 --> 00:33:42,020
I JUST WANTED
TO COME OVER HERE
873
00:33:42,063 --> 00:33:45,066
AND INVITE YOU
TO A COOKOUT.
874
00:33:45,110 --> 00:33:48,026
THANK YOU FOR THE INVITATION,
BUT I WILL NOT BE COMING
875
00:33:48,069 --> 00:33:50,376
TO YOUR...COOKOUT.
876
00:33:50,419 --> 00:33:53,292
AND KEEP IT DOWN.
877
00:33:53,335 --> 00:33:55,511
[HUMMING]
878
00:33:57,905 --> 00:34:00,125
IT'S ONE THING FOR YOU
TO CALL ME OUT MY NAME.
879
00:34:00,168 --> 00:34:01,387
IT'S A WHOLE
'NOTHER THING
880
00:34:01,430 --> 00:34:03,258
FOR YOU TO CALL ME
SOME OTHER TRICK'S NAME.
881
00:34:03,302 --> 00:34:05,782
DON'T MAKE ME BREAK THE GLASS.
I GOT TO GO.
882
00:34:05,826 --> 00:34:08,393
I'LL DEAL WITH YOU LATER.
883
00:34:08,437 --> 00:34:10,091
[MUSIC PLAYING LOUDLY]
884
00:34:10,135 --> 00:34:13,964
HEY! YO! HEY! HEY!
885
00:34:14,007 --> 00:34:16,402
WHOA! STOP!
886
00:34:16,445 --> 00:34:18,752
I'LL DO
THE TALKING, MAN.
887
00:34:18,795 --> 00:34:20,232
DO I LOOK GOOD?
888
00:34:20,275 --> 00:34:21,929
YOU LOOK FAT.
889
00:34:21,972 --> 00:34:24,409
[LAUGHTER]
890
00:34:26,847 --> 00:34:28,675
STEP OUT OF THE CAR.
891
00:34:28,717 --> 00:34:29,850
STEP OUT OF THE CAR?
892
00:34:29,893 --> 00:34:31,330
I'M NOT STEPPING
OUT OF THE CAR.
893
00:34:31,373 --> 00:34:33,245
YOU'RE A RENT-A-COP,
FOOL. HA HA!
894
00:34:33,288 --> 00:34:34,855
A RENT-A-COP?
895
00:34:34,898 --> 00:34:35,681
YEAH.
896
00:34:35,725 --> 00:34:36,900
I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW
I PASSED
897
00:34:36,944 --> 00:34:38,772
THE MARKSMANSHIP EXAM
WITH A PERFECT SCORE.
898
00:34:38,815 --> 00:34:40,643
I PASSED THE PHYSICAL
ENDURANCE TEST
899
00:34:40,687 --> 00:34:41,862
IN RECORD TIME.
900
00:34:41,905 --> 00:34:43,385
AND I PASSED
THE WRITTEN TEST
901
00:34:43,429 --> 00:34:44,690
IN THE TOP
FIRST PERCENTILE.
902
00:34:44,734 --> 00:34:47,433
THAT'S ALL THE WAY
AT THE TOP, OK?
903
00:34:47,476 --> 00:34:49,522
NOW, JUST BECAUSE
I WASN'T ABLE
904
00:34:49,565 --> 00:34:51,697
TO PASS SOME
PSYCHOLOGICAL EXAM
905
00:34:51,741 --> 00:34:53,873
DON'T MEAN I DON'T
HAVE NO AUTHORITY.
906
00:34:53,917 --> 00:34:55,963
I'LL BREAK THE GLASS
ON YOUR ASS.
907
00:34:56,005 --> 00:34:57,617
SHE CRAZY.
908
00:34:57,660 --> 00:34:59,749
NEXT TIME,
AT THE GATE, OK?
909
00:34:59,793 --> 00:35:00,837
YEAH. HOW STUPID.
910
00:35:00,881 --> 00:35:03,057
DON'T JUST
DRIVE THROUGH. STOP.
911
00:35:03,101 --> 00:35:05,886
CARRY
YOUR DUMB ASSES ON.
912
00:35:05,929 --> 00:35:07,061
[LAUGHTER]
913
00:35:07,105 --> 00:35:11,196
MAN, LET'S GET
TO COUSIN TODD'S HOUSE, MAN.
914
00:35:14,460 --> 00:35:16,375
HEY, WHAT ARE
YOU GUYS MAKING?
915
00:35:16,418 --> 00:35:20,074
[EUROPEAN ACCENT]
WE DO NOT "MAKE."
916
00:35:20,118 --> 00:35:22,598
HAM-FISTED
DAY LABOWERS MAKE.
917
00:35:22,642 --> 00:35:24,905
LABOW-WHATS?
918
00:35:24,948 --> 00:35:28,169
LABOWERS.
THE WORKERS.
919
00:35:28,213 --> 00:35:31,172
WE ARE
ARTISTS, YES?
920
00:35:31,216 --> 00:35:34,349
WE--POOF!--
CREATE.
921
00:35:34,393 --> 00:35:35,524
THEY CREATE.
922
00:35:35,568 --> 00:35:38,788
OK. SO, WHAT ARE
YOU CREATING?
923
00:35:38,832 --> 00:35:40,007
PLEASE.
924
00:35:40,050 --> 00:35:40,834
MMM!
925
00:35:40,877 --> 00:35:42,009
AH! CK-CK-CK!
926
00:35:42,052 --> 00:35:43,271
WHAT THE HECK
IS A LABOWER?
927
00:35:43,315 --> 00:35:44,229
I DON'T KNOW.
928
00:35:44,272 --> 00:35:46,187
JUST FOCUS, OK?
MS. PETERS IS--
929
00:35:46,231 --> 00:35:47,623
[DOORBELL RINGS]
930
00:35:47,667 --> 00:35:48,581
IS HERE.
931
00:35:48,624 --> 00:35:49,712
LOOK. JUST BE COOL,
BE YOURSELF.
932
00:35:49,756 --> 00:35:51,323
IF YOU FEEL LIKE
YOU'RE LOSING HER,
933
00:35:51,366 --> 00:35:52,672
TELL HER
SOME SOB STORY
934
00:35:52,715 --> 00:35:54,021
ABOUT HOW HARD
LIFE WAS
935
00:35:54,064 --> 00:35:55,196
GROWING UP
IN THE HOOD.
936
00:35:55,240 --> 00:35:56,589
WHITE LIBERALS
LOVE "THE POOR KID
937
00:35:56,632 --> 00:35:57,894
FROM THE GHETTO
DOING GOOD" RAP,
938
00:35:57,938 --> 00:35:59,418
EVEN THOUGH IVERSON
ALMOST KILLED IT.
939
00:35:59,461 --> 00:36:04,249
ALL RIGHT, RELAX, SMILE,
LOOK PRETTY.
940
00:36:05,075 --> 00:36:07,687
HELLO, MS. PETERS.
COME ON IN.
941
00:36:07,730 --> 00:36:10,994
MS. PETERS, IT IS SO NICE
TO FINALLY MEET YOU.
942
00:36:11,038 --> 00:36:12,909
THE PLEASURE
IS ALL MINE.
943
00:36:12,953 --> 00:36:14,172
I MUST SAY,
944
00:36:14,215 --> 00:36:16,652
YOU HAVE A LOVELY HOME,
AND I ESPECIALLY LIKE
945
00:36:16,696 --> 00:36:18,959
THE WAY YOU'VE
DECORATED IT.
946
00:36:19,002 --> 00:36:20,047
THANK YOU.
947
00:36:20,090 --> 00:36:23,659
YOU WERE TALKING
TO TODD. HA HA.
948
00:36:23,703 --> 00:36:24,834
WES REILLY.
COME ON IN.
949
00:36:24,878 --> 00:36:27,141
LET'S GET YOU
A NICE COLD BEVERAGE, OK?
950
00:36:27,185 --> 00:36:29,230
[RAP MUSIC
PLAYING LOUDLY]
951
00:36:29,274 --> 00:36:30,710
DID SOMEONE
JUST ASK
952
00:36:30,753 --> 00:36:34,801
WHERE THEIR
BITCHES ARE?
953
00:36:34,844 --> 00:36:38,587
[RAP MUSIC
PLAYING LOUDLY]
954
00:36:38,979 --> 00:36:42,156
WHAT'S CRACKIN',
LACKEY COUSIN?
955
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:43,157
WILLIE, NELSON,
956
00:36:43,201 --> 00:36:44,114
WHAT THE HELL
ARE YOU DOING HERE?
957
00:36:44,158 --> 00:36:47,640
SATURDAY. WE CAME
FOR THE COOKOUT.
958
00:36:47,683 --> 00:36:50,947
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
959
00:36:50,991 --> 00:36:52,471
YO, MAN, WHERE
THE GRUBBLES AT?
960
00:36:52,514 --> 00:36:54,255
WE GOT THE MUNCHIES
LIKE A MUG, MAN.
961
00:36:54,299 --> 00:36:57,127
LOOK, MAN,
FORGET IT.
962
00:36:57,171 --> 00:36:59,304
YOU DON'T MIND,
DO YOU?
963
00:36:59,347 --> 00:37:00,435
NO. GO RIGHT AHEAD.
964
00:37:00,479 --> 00:37:02,568
CHECK THIS OUT, BABY.
JUST LIKE...MMM.
965
00:37:02,611 --> 00:37:04,352
THAT JUST TASTES,
LIKE, GOOD.
966
00:37:04,396 --> 00:37:05,440
NOW, THAT IS GOOD.
967
00:37:05,484 --> 00:37:08,530
LIKE A NICE PIECE
OF WHITE BREAD. MMM!
968
00:37:08,574 --> 00:37:10,924
WITH A LITTLE BIT
OF BUTTER ON IT.
969
00:37:10,967 --> 00:37:12,186
HA HA HA!
HA HA HA!
970
00:37:12,230 --> 00:37:14,362
OK, WES, WE'VE GOT TO
RESCHEDULE THIS MEETING.
971
00:37:14,406 --> 00:37:15,581
NOT GONNA HAPPEN.
972
00:37:15,624 --> 00:37:17,496
THEIR NEW AD CAMPAIGN
IS STARTING THIS WEEK.
973
00:37:17,539 --> 00:37:19,106
WE'VE GOT TO
LOCK YOU IN TODAY.
974
00:37:19,149 --> 00:37:20,760
NO, NO, NO.
I DON'T THINK
975
00:37:20,803 --> 00:37:22,109
YOU QUITE
UNDERSTAND.
976
00:37:22,152 --> 00:37:23,241
THIS IS JUST
THE BEGINNING.
977
00:37:23,284 --> 00:37:24,329
TODD'S FAMILY
IS LIKE
978
00:37:24,372 --> 00:37:25,460
THE BLACK BEVERLY
HILLBILLIES.
979
00:37:25,504 --> 00:37:27,114
SO UNLESS SHE'S
TRYING TO SELL
980
00:37:27,157 --> 00:37:28,985
PIG LIPS
AND SOME GOLD TEETH,
981
00:37:29,029 --> 00:37:30,160
SHE'S NOT
GONNA WANT HIM.
982
00:37:30,204 --> 00:37:32,467
YOU SURE YOU DON'T
WANT NONE OF THIS?
983
00:37:32,511 --> 00:37:33,903
NO, NO. REALLY, I'M...
984
00:37:33,947 --> 00:37:35,122
Brittany:
WILLIE, NELSON,
985
00:37:35,165 --> 00:37:36,863
WHY DON'T YOU COME
OUTSIDE WITH ME?
986
00:37:36,906 --> 00:37:39,474
I WANT TO SHOW YOU
SOMETHING.
987
00:37:39,735 --> 00:37:43,478
YOU AIN'T GOT TO
ASK ME TWICE.
988
00:37:43,522 --> 00:37:46,481
Brittany: JUST FOLLOW ME.
AND GET UP.
989
00:37:46,525 --> 00:37:48,004
ALL RIGHTIE, THEN.
990
00:37:48,048 --> 00:37:49,267
SO, MS. PETERS--
991
00:37:49,310 --> 00:37:50,616
NO NEED
FOR SMALL TALK, OK?
992
00:37:50,659 --> 00:37:53,488
TODD IS GOOD-LOOKING.
HE'S CHARMING. HE'S LIKABLE.
993
00:37:53,532 --> 00:37:56,578
HE COULD SELL AN ICE CUBE
TO AN ESKIMO.
994
00:37:56,622 --> 00:37:57,840
I'M SURE HE CAN,
995
00:37:57,884 --> 00:37:59,842
BUT WE'RE NOT LOOKING
FOR A SALESMAN.
996
00:37:59,886 --> 00:38:01,714
WHAT WE NEED IS
A YOUNG, ENTHUSIASTIC--
997
00:38:01,757 --> 00:38:03,803
[LOUD CONVERSATION]
998
00:38:03,846 --> 00:38:04,804
WHOA.
999
00:38:04,847 --> 00:38:08,198
I SEE TODD DONE
MADE SOME CHANGES.
1000
00:38:08,242 --> 00:38:10,331
YEAH. WELL, IT
WAS ALL MY IDEA
1001
00:38:10,375 --> 00:38:11,593
FOR THE STYLE,
1002
00:38:11,637 --> 00:38:13,073
BUT I JUST
WANTED TO REALLY
1003
00:38:13,116 --> 00:38:14,683
CAPTURE
TODD'S TASTES.
1004
00:38:14,727 --> 00:38:16,076
OH, HOLD UP,
YOU GUYS.
1005
00:38:16,119 --> 00:38:18,296
NOW, I'M
THE TOUR.
1006
00:38:18,339 --> 00:38:23,344
CONGRATULATIONS
ON ALL YOUR NEW TASTE.
1007
00:38:23,388 --> 00:38:25,738
MOM, I'D LIKE YOU
TO MEET MS. PETERS.
1008
00:38:25,781 --> 00:38:26,956
MS. PETERS
IS CONSIDERING ME
1009
00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:29,394
AS A SPOKESPERSON
FOR STONE MOUNTAIN PHONES.
1010
00:38:29,437 --> 00:38:30,308
YES.
1011
00:38:30,351 --> 00:38:32,353
NICE TO MEET YOU,
MS. PETERS.
1012
00:38:32,397 --> 00:38:34,137
YOU'RE GONNA
LOVE TODD.
1013
00:38:34,181 --> 00:38:36,357
HE'S QUITE
THE ACTOR.
1014
00:38:36,401 --> 00:38:39,186
EVEN IF HE DOESN'T
LIKE SOMETHING,
1015
00:38:39,229 --> 00:38:41,928
YOU'LL THINK
HE DOES.
1016
00:38:41,971 --> 00:38:45,061
HEY, GUESS WHO WE
MUST HAVE TALKED UP.
1017
00:38:45,105 --> 00:38:46,106
BECKY.
1018
00:38:46,149 --> 00:38:48,064
SHE STOPPED ME
IN THE GROCERY STORE.
1019
00:38:48,108 --> 00:38:49,588
I INVITED HER
TO THE COOKOUT.
1020
00:38:49,631 --> 00:38:51,241
OH, GREAT. I CAN'T
WAIT TO SEE HER.
1021
00:38:51,285 --> 00:38:52,678
GOOD! GOOD!
BECKY'S COMING!
1022
00:38:52,721 --> 00:38:54,070
MORE VISITORS!
FANTASTIC!
1023
00:38:54,114 --> 00:38:55,245
HOW DOES SHE LOOK?
1024
00:38:55,289 --> 00:38:57,030
DID THE BRACES
DO ANYTHING FOR HER?
1025
00:38:57,073 --> 00:38:58,379
YOU'LL SEE
WHEN SHE GETS HERE.
1026
00:38:58,423 --> 00:39:00,947
YOU GUYS ARE STAYING
FOR THE COOKOUT, RIGHT?
1027
00:39:00,990 --> 00:39:02,252
WE'RE HAVING
A COOKOUT TODAY.
1028
00:39:02,296 --> 00:39:04,646
EXCUSE ME. I GOT TO GET
THAT GRILL RUNNING.
1029
00:39:04,690 --> 00:39:07,736
AND THIS IS OUR--
I MEAN TODD'S GARAGE.
1030
00:39:07,780 --> 00:39:11,392
WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?
1031
00:39:12,088 --> 00:39:14,134
WOULDN'T MIND
PARKING IN THAT
1032
00:39:14,177 --> 00:39:17,398
EVERY DAY
OF THE WEEK. MAN!
1033
00:39:17,442 --> 00:39:19,400
YOU THINKING
WHAT I'M THINKING?
1034
00:39:19,444 --> 00:39:21,837
IS THAT TODD'S
BEDROOM SET?
1035
00:39:21,881 --> 00:39:23,491
UM...THAT'S
THE OLD ONE.
1036
00:39:23,535 --> 00:39:25,058
YOU SEE,
WE GOT A NEW ONE.
1037
00:39:25,101 --> 00:39:26,755
YOU KNOW, THIS
ENDORSEMENT IS JUST
1038
00:39:26,799 --> 00:39:28,278
REALLY IMPORTANT
FOR TODD AND I,
1039
00:39:28,322 --> 00:39:29,932
AND WE JUST
WANTED TO MAKE SURE
1040
00:39:29,976 --> 00:39:31,760
THAT WE MADE
A GOOD IMPRESSION
1041
00:39:31,804 --> 00:39:32,892
ON MS. PETERS.
1042
00:39:32,935 --> 00:39:34,241
BRITTANY,
LISTEN, HONEY.
1043
00:39:34,284 --> 00:39:36,112
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE
TO BE A BIG HIT
1044
00:39:36,156 --> 00:39:38,506
WITH THE FAMILY
AT THE COOKOUT?
1045
00:39:38,550 --> 00:39:39,420
REALLY?
1046
00:39:39,464 --> 00:39:41,248
NO, NO, NO.
A REALLY BIG HIT.
1047
00:39:41,291 --> 00:39:42,684
GOODY! A PROJECT?
1048
00:39:42,728 --> 00:39:44,207
WELL, WHAT CAN I DO?
1049
00:39:44,251 --> 00:39:46,122
OK. I WANT YOU TO RUN
UP TO TEANECK
1050
00:39:46,166 --> 00:39:47,733
AND GET ME A HAM
FOR MY GREENS.
1051
00:39:47,776 --> 00:39:49,169
WILL YOU DO THAT
FOR ME?
1052
00:39:49,212 --> 00:39:51,606
ISN'T TEANECK
LIKE AN HOUR AWAY?
1053
00:39:51,650 --> 00:39:53,521
YEAH, THAT'S
AN HOUR AWAY,
1054
00:39:53,565 --> 00:39:55,480
BUT THAT HAM
IS TODD'S FAVORITE.
1055
00:39:55,523 --> 00:39:58,613
AND LISTEN HERE.
IF YOU GO UP THERE
1056
00:39:58,657 --> 00:39:59,788
AND GET THAT NOW,
1057
00:39:59,832 --> 00:40:02,269
TODD MIGHT BUY YOU
SOMETHING SPECIAL.
1058
00:40:02,312 --> 00:40:03,618
YOU THINK SO?
1059
00:40:03,662 --> 00:40:04,793
I KNOW HE WILL.
1060
00:40:04,837 --> 00:40:06,316
THANK YOU, LADY EM.
ANYTHING THAT YOU SAY.
1061
00:40:06,360 --> 00:40:08,710
THIS MEANS SO MUCH TO ME.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.
1062
00:40:08,754 --> 00:40:10,712
THE ROOMS ARE UPSTAIRS.
POOL'S OUT BACK.
1063
00:40:10,756 --> 00:40:12,235
MAKE YOURSELVES AT HOME.
1064
00:40:12,279 --> 00:40:15,021
AND TELL TODD
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
1065
00:40:15,064 --> 00:40:16,196
MWAH! MWAH!
1066
00:40:16,239 --> 00:40:18,067
UH-HUH. ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT.
1067
00:40:18,111 --> 00:40:18,894
THANK YOU.
1068
00:40:18,938 --> 00:40:21,331
YEAH, YOU
GO AHEAD ON NOW.
1069
00:40:21,375 --> 00:40:24,073
[CAR DOOR CLOSES,
ENGINE STARTS]
1070
00:40:24,117 --> 00:40:25,771
DUMB-ASS.
1071
00:40:29,339 --> 00:40:32,865
Wheezer: DOGGIE.
I SEE YOU, DOGGIE.
1072
00:40:32,908 --> 00:40:34,083
PRETTY DOGGIE.
1073
00:40:34,127 --> 00:40:37,826
YOU ARE PRETTY, DOGGIE.
I LOVE YOU, DOGGIE.
1074
00:40:37,870 --> 00:40:41,569
YO! GET YOUR ASS UP
OFF THE FLOOR!
1075
00:40:41,613 --> 00:40:42,570
HUH?
1076
00:40:42,614 --> 00:40:45,094
GET UP!
1077
00:40:45,138 --> 00:40:48,750
CAN I HELP YOU FELLAS?
1078
00:40:48,794 --> 00:40:50,186
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
YOU CAN.
1079
00:40:50,230 --> 00:40:51,492
LET ME GET THESE
CAKES AND, UM...
1080
00:40:51,536 --> 00:40:53,059
EVERYTHING
IN THE REGISTER!
1081
00:40:53,102 --> 00:40:54,756
I WANT CASH, COINS,
1082
00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:57,019
FOOD STAMPS,
EVERYTHING, MAN.
1083
00:40:57,063 --> 00:40:58,194
HEY, YO, BLING.
1084
00:40:58,238 --> 00:41:00,196
YOUR MAN IS
ALL OVER THE PLACE.
1085
00:41:00,240 --> 00:41:01,154
NOT RIGHT NOW,
WHEEZE.
1086
00:41:01,197 --> 00:41:02,198
I'M IN THE MIDDLE
OF SOMETHING.
1087
00:41:02,242 --> 00:41:03,809
IT'S A NICE PICTURE
OF HIM, TOO.
1088
00:41:03,852 --> 00:41:05,245
LET ME SEE THIS.
1089
00:41:05,288 --> 00:41:07,682
MR. BIG SHOT.
1090
00:41:07,726 --> 00:41:10,642
YEAH.
THIS IS GOOD.
1091
00:41:10,990 --> 00:41:12,861
WHERE CAN I FIND
THIS HOUSE RIGHT HERE?
1092
00:41:12,905 --> 00:41:16,212
DOES ANYBODY KNOW
WHERE TODD KEEPS HIS LARD?
1093
00:41:16,256 --> 00:41:17,475
LARD?
1094
00:41:17,518 --> 00:41:20,042
OH, MY GOD.
OH, I FEEL DIZZY.
1095
00:41:20,086 --> 00:41:22,871
OLIVIER, MY TEMPLES--
RUB THEM VIGOROUSLY.
1096
00:41:22,915 --> 00:41:24,438
OH.
1097
00:41:24,482 --> 00:41:25,961
SEE WHAT
YOU HAVE DONE?
1098
00:41:26,005 --> 00:41:27,223
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
1099
00:41:27,267 --> 00:41:30,705
YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW
WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE--
1100
00:41:30,749 --> 00:41:34,100
WHO I AM?
YOU TELL HER WHO I AM.
1101
00:41:34,143 --> 00:41:38,583
OK. HE IS SVEN
FROM PRAGUE,
1102
00:41:38,626 --> 00:41:41,455
INTERNATIONALLY
RENOWNED MASTER CHEF--
1103
00:41:41,499 --> 00:41:43,544
MEIN CHEFMEISTER--
1104
00:41:43,588 --> 00:41:44,806
CHILD PRODIGY,
1105
00:41:44,850 --> 00:41:47,156
GRADUATE OF
LE CORDON BLEU
1106
00:41:47,200 --> 00:41:48,244
AT AGE 9.
1107
00:41:48,288 --> 00:41:50,508
NOW, HE IS FLUENT
IN THE CUISINE
1108
00:41:50,551 --> 00:41:52,248
OF OVER 100 NATIONS
1109
00:41:52,292 --> 00:41:54,903
AND KNOWN IN
THE CULINARY WORLD
1110
00:41:54,947 --> 00:41:56,775
AS THE PICASSO
OF PATE,
1111
00:41:56,818 --> 00:41:59,299
THE VAN GOGH
OF VEAL,
1112
00:41:59,342 --> 00:42:02,432
AND THE MICHELANGELO
OF MEAT.
1113
00:42:02,476 --> 00:42:04,260
VAN HOCK.
1114
00:42:04,304 --> 00:42:09,222
AND THIS IS
LADY EM OF NEWARK.
1115
00:42:09,265 --> 00:42:12,094
SHE HAS BEEN
CLEANING CHITTERLINGS
1116
00:42:12,138 --> 00:42:13,661
SINCE SHE WAS 6,
1117
00:42:13,705 --> 00:42:16,316
AND SHE IS KNOWN
THROUGHOUT THE HOOD
1118
00:42:16,359 --> 00:42:18,100
AS THE PATTI LABELLE
OF PORK,
1119
00:42:18,144 --> 00:42:20,625
THE BILLIE HOLIDAY
OF HOT LINKS,
1120
00:42:20,668 --> 00:42:26,674
THE ARETHA FRANKLIN
OF FRIED CHICKEN.
1121
00:42:26,718 --> 00:42:28,937
I CANNOT WORK LIKE THIS!
1122
00:42:28,981 --> 00:42:30,112
OLIVIER...
1123
00:42:30,156 --> 00:42:31,636
DRAMATIC EXIT.
1124
00:42:31,679 --> 00:42:33,768
[CLAP CLAP]
1125
00:42:37,076 --> 00:42:39,600
WAIT. WAIT. WHERE
ARE YOU GUYS GOING?
1126
00:42:39,644 --> 00:42:41,428
SVEN CANNOT WORK
1127
00:42:41,471 --> 00:42:43,604
UNDER
THESE CONDITIONS!
1128
00:42:43,648 --> 00:42:44,692
WHAT CONDITIONS?
1129
00:42:44,736 --> 00:42:45,867
THE WOMAN
IN THE KITCHEN,
1130
00:42:45,911 --> 00:42:47,739
THE PATTI LABELLE
OF PORK--
1131
00:42:47,782 --> 00:42:49,218
SHE IS THE COOLIO
OF CANNED MEAT.
1132
00:42:49,262 --> 00:42:51,960
I'M GONNA GO TALK TO HER
RIGHT NOW, AND IT'LL BE FINE.
1133
00:42:52,004 --> 00:42:54,136
YOU GUYS, PLEASE,
PLEASE DON'T LEAVE.
1134
00:42:54,180 --> 00:42:55,616
OH, QUICKLY, GO.
1135
00:42:55,660 --> 00:42:57,705
THANK YOU.
1136
00:42:59,664 --> 00:43:01,100
AAH!
AAH!
1137
00:43:01,143 --> 00:43:02,231
THIS COUSIN TODD'S HOUSE?
1138
00:43:02,275 --> 00:43:05,234
HOW Y'ALL DOING?
WHAT'S UP, COUSIN TODD?
1139
00:43:05,278 --> 00:43:09,282
JASPER, JEROME,
WHY? WHY?
1140
00:43:10,892 --> 00:43:13,416
HERE'S YOUR HAM.
1141
00:43:14,679 --> 00:43:16,028
WHAT HAPPENED?
1142
00:43:16,071 --> 00:43:19,466
BABY, SVEN
AND OLIVIER LEFT.
1143
00:43:19,509 --> 00:43:21,337
THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO COOK
BRUNCH FOR MS. PETERS.
1144
00:43:21,381 --> 00:43:23,339
WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO DO NOW?
1145
00:43:23,383 --> 00:43:25,646
LOOK, I RAISED YOU
AND HALF YOUR COUSINS
1146
00:43:25,690 --> 00:43:27,126
ON MY COOKING.
1147
00:43:27,169 --> 00:43:29,084
NOW, IF IT'S GOOD
ENOUGH FOR THEM,
1148
00:43:29,128 --> 00:43:30,259
IT'S GOOD ENOUGH
FOR HER.
1149
00:43:30,303 --> 00:43:32,566
NOW, Y'ALL GET
THAT ANIMAL OUTSIDE
1150
00:43:32,610 --> 00:43:33,741
AND SKIN HIM.
GO AHEAD.
1151
00:43:33,785 --> 00:43:35,700
YOU'RE DROPPING BRAIN
ALL OVER THE FLOOR.
1152
00:43:35,743 --> 00:43:36,701
YES, MA'AM.
1153
00:43:36,744 --> 00:43:38,833
THAT'S OUR HOMEMADE
SLIP-N-SLIDE.
1154
00:43:38,877 --> 00:43:40,182
PICK HIM UP.
1155
00:43:40,226 --> 00:43:42,184
HOMEMADE SLIP-N-SLIDE.
1156
00:43:42,228 --> 00:43:43,925
BRITTANY.
1157
00:43:44,578 --> 00:43:45,361
YES?
1158
00:43:45,405 --> 00:43:46,711
LOW-SODIUM HAM?
1159
00:43:46,754 --> 00:43:47,929
WHAT'S THIS, BABY?
1160
00:43:47,973 --> 00:43:49,670
IT'S HEALTHIER HAM,
AND IT'S BETTER FOR TODD
1161
00:43:49,714 --> 00:43:51,498
BECAUSE HE NEEDS
TO STAY IN SHAPE.
1162
00:43:51,541 --> 00:43:53,413
DO YOU KNOW WHAT
A HEALTHY COOKOUT IS?
1163
00:43:53,456 --> 00:43:55,720
NO, NO, NO. DON'T
ANSWER THAT QUESTION.
1164
00:43:55,763 --> 00:43:57,460
BECAUSE THERE'S
NO SUCH THING
1165
00:43:57,504 --> 00:43:58,853
AS A HEALTHY
COOKOUT.
1166
00:43:58,897 --> 00:44:00,420
LOOK AROUND
THIS COUNTER.
1167
00:44:00,463 --> 00:44:02,117
YOU SEE ANYTHING
HEALTHY?
1168
00:44:02,161 --> 00:44:03,118
LOOK AT THIS.
1169
00:44:03,162 --> 00:44:04,293
CHITTERLINGS--
SODIUM.
1170
00:44:04,337 --> 00:44:05,468
MACARONI AND CHEESE--
SODIUM.
1171
00:44:05,512 --> 00:44:07,166
GREENS--SODIUM,
BLACK-EYED PEAS--SODIUM,
1172
00:44:07,209 --> 00:44:08,297
POTATO SALAD--SODIUM.
1173
00:44:08,341 --> 00:44:10,125
SODIUM, SODIUM,
SODIUM! OK?
1174
00:44:10,169 --> 00:44:11,953
AND AS FOR TODD,
1175
00:44:11,997 --> 00:44:13,868
THAT BOY'S EATEN
SO MUCH SODIUM,
1176
00:44:13,912 --> 00:44:16,001
HE COULD CRAP
A SALT LICK.
1177
00:44:16,044 --> 00:44:17,480
DIDN'T KEEP HIM
OUT OF THE PROS,
1178
00:44:17,524 --> 00:44:18,394
NOW DID IT?
1179
00:44:18,438 --> 00:44:21,136
LITTLE BRITTANY,
I NEED A HAM.
1180
00:44:21,180 --> 00:44:24,487
AND I WANT THAT HAM
TO BE...WHAT?
1181
00:44:24,531 --> 00:44:25,575
SODIUM.
1182
00:44:25,619 --> 00:44:27,665
WITH SODIUM.
1183
00:44:27,708 --> 00:44:29,492
OK.
1184
00:44:30,363 --> 00:44:31,538
GOOD GIRL.
1185
00:44:31,581 --> 00:44:33,409
Ms. Peters: EXCUSE ME.
1186
00:44:33,453 --> 00:44:34,976
MAY I HAVE A GLASS OF--
1187
00:44:35,020 --> 00:44:36,804
WAH!
1188
00:44:36,848 --> 00:44:38,458
MS. PETERS!
1189
00:44:39,372 --> 00:44:41,504
HELP ME, JESUS.
1190
00:44:41,548 --> 00:44:44,551
QUICK NOW. AND DON'T FORGET
MY CAST-IRON POT,
1191
00:44:44,594 --> 00:44:47,685
BECAUSE LADY EM GONNA TRY
TO OUTDO MY CORNBREAD,
1192
00:44:47,728 --> 00:44:48,816
AS IF SHE COULD.
1193
00:44:48,860 --> 00:44:50,905
COME ON, MA.
WHY DOES EVERYTHING
1194
00:44:50,949 --> 00:44:52,385
BETWEEN YOU
AND AUNTIE EM
1195
00:44:52,428 --> 00:44:53,821
HAVE TO BE
A COMPETITION?
1196
00:44:53,865 --> 00:44:55,301
HONEY, THERE IS
NO COMPETITION,
1197
00:44:55,344 --> 00:44:57,520
BECAUSE I'M BETTER
THAN SHE IS.
1198
00:44:57,564 --> 00:44:59,435
NOW GET
IN THE HOUSE.
1199
00:44:59,479 --> 00:45:01,742
FRANK, SHAKE
A TAILFEATHER.
1200
00:45:01,786 --> 00:45:03,744
GIVE ME A HAND,
GRANDPA?
1201
00:45:03,788 --> 00:45:08,793
NOPE. MY HANDS ARE
ALREADY FILLED, SON.
1202
00:45:11,883 --> 00:45:14,668
HO. HO. HO.
1203
00:45:14,712 --> 00:45:16,191
STOP RIGHT THERE.
1204
00:45:16,235 --> 00:45:19,064
STOP, YOU, RIGHT THERE.
1205
00:45:20,587 --> 00:45:21,806
LOOK, CUT THE ENGINE OFF,
1206
00:45:21,849 --> 00:45:24,199
BUT DON'T TURN OFF THAT RECORD.
THAT'S MY JAM.
1207
00:45:24,243 --> 00:45:26,114
YO, I'M HERE
TO SEE TODD ANDERSEN.
1208
00:45:26,158 --> 00:45:28,769
OH, NO, I DON'T
THINK SO. HE'S OVER.
1209
00:45:28,813 --> 00:45:31,380
HE'S OVER? WHAT YOU MEAN?
HE LIVES HERE, DON'T HE?
1210
00:45:31,424 --> 00:45:35,602
WELL, SEE, REGULATION 42-B,
SUBSECTION 6, CLEARLY STATES
1211
00:45:35,645 --> 00:45:39,649
THAT RESIDENTS ARE ALLOWED
A LIMITEDNUMBER OF VISITORS.
1212
00:45:39,693 --> 00:45:40,912
YOU MEAN TO TELL ME
1213
00:45:40,955 --> 00:45:42,609
I CAN'T EVEN SEE
MY OWN COUSIN?
1214
00:45:42,652 --> 00:45:44,306
THAT'S EXACTLY
WHAT I'M SAYING.
1215
00:45:44,350 --> 00:45:45,655
ALL RIGHT,
YOU KNOW WHAT?
1216
00:45:45,699 --> 00:45:46,874
LISTEN UP,
RENT-A-COP.
1217
00:45:46,918 --> 00:45:48,658
YOU DON'T EVEN
HAVE A GUN.
1218
00:45:48,702 --> 00:45:50,312
YOU HAVE A FLASHLIGHT,
ALL RIGHT?
1219
00:45:50,356 --> 00:45:53,011
I DIDN'T DRIVE ALL THE WAY
UP HERE FOR NOTHING.
1220
00:45:53,054 --> 00:45:55,404
YOU SEE THESE BABIES
IN THIS CAR?
1221
00:45:55,448 --> 00:45:56,884
THEY NEEDS A DADDY.
1222
00:45:56,928 --> 00:45:58,059
A...BALLER. SWOOSH.
1223
00:45:58,103 --> 00:46:00,235
SO WHAT I'M GONNA
NEED YOU TO DO
1224
00:46:00,279 --> 00:46:01,323
IS RUN ON OVER
1225
00:46:01,367 --> 00:46:02,760
TO THAT LITTLE
PHONE BOOTH OVER THERE,
1226
00:46:02,803 --> 00:46:04,326
PICK UP THAT PHONE,
CALL MY COUSIN TODD,
1227
00:46:04,370 --> 00:46:05,850
AND TELL HIM LIL DEE
IS AT THE GATE.
1228
00:46:05,893 --> 00:46:09,027
WAIT. HOLD UP.
DID YOU SAY LIL DEE?
1229
00:46:09,070 --> 00:46:10,158
YES, I DID.
1230
00:46:10,202 --> 00:46:11,943
DO YOU KNOW
MARQUIS FONTAINEAU?
1231
00:46:11,986 --> 00:46:14,989
LIGHT SKIN
WITH THE GOOD HAIR?
1232
00:46:15,033 --> 00:46:16,425
YEAH, I KNOW HIM.
1233
00:46:16,469 --> 00:46:17,731
YOU KNOW MY DADDY?
1234
00:46:17,775 --> 00:46:18,993
AW, HELL, NO!
1235
00:46:19,037 --> 00:46:20,734
LET'S ROLL.
1236
00:46:23,084 --> 00:46:25,957
MARQUIS, I THOUGHT YOU SAID
YOU DIDN'T KNOW LIL DEE.
1237
00:46:26,000 --> 00:46:28,568
I MET HER. I SEEN HER.
I SEEN YOUR DAMN BABY.
1238
00:46:28,611 --> 00:46:30,352
I COULD BE WRONG,
BUT I THINK YOU'RE
1239
00:46:30,396 --> 00:46:32,441
GETTING A LITTLE HEAVY
UP ON THE FAMILY.
1240
00:46:32,485 --> 00:46:34,052
I MEAN,
A FEW ADDS CHARM,
1241
00:46:34,095 --> 00:46:35,444
BUT THIS IS
STARTING TO LOOK
1242
00:46:35,488 --> 00:46:36,968
LIKE A RERUN
OF GOOD TIMES.
1243
00:46:37,011 --> 00:46:38,273
MAMA COULDN'T MAKE IT.
1244
00:46:38,317 --> 00:46:39,753
YOU KNOW,
HER RHEUMATOID ARTHRITIS
1245
00:46:39,797 --> 00:46:41,233
STARTED FLARING UP
IN THAT LEFT ELBOW.
1246
00:46:41,276 --> 00:46:42,756
SO I HAD TO GIVE HER
AN ICY-HOT PATCH.
1247
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:44,236
SHE SAID SHE'D
SEE YOU NEXT TIME.
1248
00:46:44,279 --> 00:46:45,759
Todd: I TOLD YOU
TO RESCHEDULE IT, MAN.
1249
00:46:45,803 --> 00:46:48,544
JUST GO HANDLE MS. PETERS.
I'LL TAKE CARE OF THIS.
1250
00:46:48,588 --> 00:46:49,719
ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT.
1251
00:46:49,763 --> 00:46:52,026
Boy: DADDY! DADDY!
DADDY! DADDY!
1252
00:46:52,070 --> 00:46:54,202
UM, TODD, DO YOU
WANT TO DO SOMETHING
1253
00:46:54,246 --> 00:46:56,248
ABOUT THESE
LITTLE KIDS HERE?
1254
00:46:56,291 --> 00:46:58,467
I'M NOT
YOUR DADDY. NO.
1255
00:46:58,511 --> 00:46:59,686
Lil Dee: COME HERE!
1256
00:46:59,729 --> 00:47:03,603
NOBODY KNOWS WHO
YOUR DADDIES ARE.
1257
00:47:03,908 --> 00:47:06,780
NOW, WHAT DO YOU
CALL THESE AGAIN?
1258
00:47:06,824 --> 00:47:08,695
CHITTERLINGS.
AND A COOKOUT
1259
00:47:08,738 --> 00:47:11,567
AIN'T A COOKOUT
WITHOUT THEM.
1260
00:47:11,611 --> 00:47:13,221
I HATE TO ASK,
1261
00:47:13,265 --> 00:47:16,964
BUT WHAT EXACTLY
IS A COOKOUT?
1262
00:47:17,008 --> 00:47:20,228
WELL, IT'S WHEN
THE FAMILY GETS TOGETHER.
1263
00:47:20,272 --> 00:47:22,143
YOU SEE THEM OUT THERE?
1264
00:47:22,187 --> 00:47:27,018
WE GET TOGETHER.
WE DANCE.
1265
00:47:27,061 --> 00:47:31,413
WE GRILL MEAT.
WE SHARE GOSSIP.
1266
00:47:31,457 --> 00:47:36,984
WE SING. WE CAN PLAY
DOMINOES, CARDS.
1267
00:47:37,028 --> 00:47:39,508
WE HAVE A GOOD TIME.
1268
00:47:39,552 --> 00:47:41,771
THE THREE F's--
1269
00:47:41,815 --> 00:47:43,208
FUN...
1270
00:47:43,251 --> 00:47:45,210
FOOD...
1271
00:47:45,253 --> 00:47:47,081
FAMILY.
1272
00:47:47,125 --> 00:47:48,256
HMM...
1273
00:47:48,300 --> 00:47:49,605
OOH!
1274
00:47:49,649 --> 00:47:50,955
[MEN LAUGHING]
1275
00:47:50,998 --> 00:47:52,870
THAT AIN'T RIGHT.
1276
00:47:52,913 --> 00:47:54,915
LEROY, USE
A COASTER, MAN.
1277
00:47:54,959 --> 00:47:56,917
YOU'RE MESSING UP
MY TABLE.
1278
00:47:56,961 --> 00:47:58,614
YOU LEFT IT OUT HERE
FOR PUBLIC USE.
1279
00:47:58,658 --> 00:47:59,964
THE LAW SAYS THAT'S
AN ASSUMED RISK.
1280
00:48:00,007 --> 00:48:02,357
YOU NEED TO STOP FRONTING
LIKE YOU'RE A REAL LAWYER
1281
00:48:02,401 --> 00:48:04,446
AND PASS THE BAR.
DO THAT.
1282
00:48:04,490 --> 00:48:05,534
A REAL LAWYER.
1283
00:48:05,578 --> 00:48:07,493
HEY, I KNOW MORE
THAN ANY REAL LAWYER.
1284
00:48:07,536 --> 00:48:09,930
I TOOK THE BAR 15 TIMES.
THEY ONLY TOOK IT ONCE.
1285
00:48:09,974 --> 00:48:11,932
DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH
YOU LEARN ABOUT THE LAW
1286
00:48:11,976 --> 00:48:13,803
WHEN YOU TAKE IT OVER
AND OVER AND OVER?
1287
00:48:13,847 --> 00:48:17,503
HUH? JOJO, WHEN IS
THAT FOOD GONNA BE READY?
1288
00:48:17,546 --> 00:48:19,809
I'M STARVING.
1289
00:48:19,853 --> 00:48:20,810
WHOO!
1290
00:48:20,854 --> 00:48:24,031
AW, MAN, NICE PLACE
TODD GOT HERE.
1291
00:48:24,075 --> 00:48:25,903
SURE IS.
MM-HMM.
1292
00:48:25,946 --> 00:48:27,817
I MEAN, LOOK
AT THE TREES.
1293
00:48:27,861 --> 00:48:29,863
YOU KNOW, I PLANTED
A TREE ONCE.
1294
00:48:29,907 --> 00:48:33,171
NEVER COULD
GET IT TO GROW.
1295
00:48:33,214 --> 00:48:35,216
HEY...GRASS.
1296
00:48:35,260 --> 00:48:37,479
I COULD NEVER GET
MY LAWN THIS NICE.
1297
00:48:37,523 --> 00:48:40,656
THAT'S BECAUSE
YOU'RE BLACK.
1298
00:48:41,266 --> 00:48:43,746
WHAT?
I GOT RACIST GRASS?
1299
00:48:43,790 --> 00:48:45,096
NO. THE WATER
COMPANY--
1300
00:48:45,139 --> 00:48:46,401
THEY PUMP
LOW-GRADE WATER
1301
00:48:46,445 --> 00:48:47,533
INTO THE BLACK
NEIGHBORHOODS.
1302
00:48:47,576 --> 00:48:50,014
THAT'S WHY YOU
NEVER SEE NICE LAWNS
1303
00:48:50,057 --> 00:48:51,319
IN BLACK
COMMUNITIES.
1304
00:48:51,363 --> 00:48:53,582
WHAT THE HELL
IS LOW-GRADE WATER?
1305
00:48:53,626 --> 00:48:56,150
IS IT POSSIBLE, LEROY,
1306
00:48:56,194 --> 00:48:59,849
THAT PEOPLE IN THE HOOD,
THEY CAN'T AFFORD LANDSCAPERS,
1307
00:48:59,893 --> 00:49:02,678
AND THEY SAVE MONEY
ON THE WATER,
1308
00:49:02,722 --> 00:49:04,985
SO THEY DON'T WATER
THEIR LAWN AS MUCH?
1309
00:49:05,029 --> 00:49:09,033
THAT'S WHAT THE MAN
WANTS YOU TO THINK.
1310
00:49:09,076 --> 00:49:10,686
[LAUGHTER]
1311
00:49:10,730 --> 00:49:12,993
Bling: HOW FAR AWAY
ARE WE?
1312
00:49:13,037 --> 00:49:15,039
YOU GO SOUTH
BY MY THUMB,
1313
00:49:15,082 --> 00:49:18,564
AND YOU MAKE A RIGHT
AT MY PINKIE,
1314
00:49:18,607 --> 00:49:20,087
AND YOU GO 2 INCHES.
1315
00:49:20,131 --> 00:49:23,569
OH, WAIT. OH, WAIT.
I GOT IT UPSIDE-DOWN.
1316
00:49:25,397 --> 00:49:28,052
THIS JUST DON'T
MAKE NO SENSE.
1317
00:49:28,095 --> 00:49:29,575
GIVE ME
THE DAMN MAP.
1318
00:49:29,618 --> 00:49:31,185
LET ME SEE.
I GOT IT, BLING.
1319
00:49:31,229 --> 00:49:32,926
[TIRES SCREECHING]
1320
00:49:32,970 --> 00:49:34,580
WHEEZE! WHEEZE!
1321
00:49:34,623 --> 00:49:35,624
I GOT IT! I GOT IT!
1322
00:49:35,668 --> 00:49:37,235
LET GO!
WHAT YOU DOING, MAN?
1323
00:49:37,278 --> 00:49:39,715
WATCH OUT FOR THE CAT.
1324
00:49:39,759 --> 00:49:42,240
[TIRES SCREECH]
1325
00:49:45,156 --> 00:49:46,984
SO SHE GOT MAD AT ME,
1326
00:49:47,027 --> 00:49:48,550
AND SHE'S GONNA...
1327
00:49:48,594 --> 00:49:50,944
SHUT THE HELL UP.
1328
00:49:52,859 --> 00:49:53,816
DAMN.
1329
00:49:53,860 --> 00:49:56,297
LOOK WHAT YOU MADE
ME DO TO MY CAR!
1330
00:49:56,341 --> 00:49:57,255
SORRY.
1331
00:49:57,298 --> 00:49:58,996
IF MY ARM WASN'T
NUMB RIGHT NOW,
1332
00:49:59,039 --> 00:50:00,432
I'D KNOCK
YOUR HEAD OFF.
1333
00:50:00,475 --> 00:50:03,043
YOU'RE CONFUSING
ME HERE.
1334
00:50:03,087 --> 00:50:04,784
WHICH WAY IS SOUTH?
1335
00:50:04,827 --> 00:50:06,960
HEY.
1336
00:50:07,004 --> 00:50:09,093
LOOK AT THE KITTY.
1337
00:50:09,136 --> 00:50:11,095
THAT'S A RARE SPECIES.
1338
00:50:11,138 --> 00:50:12,618
HEY, KITTY, KITTY, KITTY.
1339
00:50:12,661 --> 00:50:15,186
HEY, KITTY, KITTY,
KITTY, KITTY, KITTY.
1340
00:50:15,229 --> 00:50:18,102
HEY, KITTY, KITTY--
1341
00:50:20,408 --> 00:50:21,757
[COUGHING]
1342
00:50:21,801 --> 00:50:24,369
WHAT THE HELL
ARE YOU DOING?
1343
00:50:24,412 --> 00:50:27,154
[COUGHING]
1344
00:50:27,198 --> 00:50:28,851
WHAT THE HELL
ARE YOU DOING, MAN?
1345
00:50:28,895 --> 00:50:29,809
WHAT HAPPENED?
1346
00:50:29,852 --> 00:50:32,855
I THINK HE JUST
FARTED ON ME.
1347
00:50:32,899 --> 00:50:34,205
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING--
1348
00:50:34,248 --> 00:50:35,641
FOOL! GET
THEM SNEAKERS, MAN!
1349
00:50:35,684 --> 00:50:39,123
WE'RE RUNNING OUT
OF TIME OVER HERE.
1350
00:50:40,037 --> 00:50:42,126
MY BABY.
1351
00:50:43,866 --> 00:50:46,782
HURRY UP, MAN.
1352
00:50:47,522 --> 00:50:48,697
YOU SMELL THAT?
1353
00:50:48,741 --> 00:50:50,786
WHAT THE HELL
IS THAT SMELL?
1354
00:50:50,830 --> 00:50:52,571
IT'S PROBABLY THESE
STINKY-ASS SNEAKERS
1355
00:50:52,614 --> 00:50:54,312
YOU GOT ME
LUGGING AROUND.
1356
00:50:54,355 --> 00:50:56,749
MAN, THEM SNEAKERS
ARE GONNA GET US PAID.
1357
00:50:56,792 --> 00:51:01,275
MAN, WALK OVER THERE, MAN.
THEM SNEAKERS STINK.
1358
00:51:01,319 --> 00:51:03,495
[LOUD MUSIC PLAYING]
1359
00:51:03,538 --> 00:51:05,497
SHH...
1360
00:51:13,940 --> 00:51:17,030
LOOK. RIGHT.
1361
00:51:18,727 --> 00:51:21,034
WELL, GIVE ME A LEG UP.
1362
00:51:21,078 --> 00:51:22,514
OK.
1363
00:51:22,557 --> 00:51:23,515
HERE.
1364
00:51:23,558 --> 00:51:25,517
READY?
1365
00:51:33,568 --> 00:51:34,830
DO YOU SEE
ANYTHING?
1366
00:51:34,874 --> 00:51:36,267
THEY'RE TURNING
OUR COMMUNITY
1367
00:51:36,310 --> 00:51:39,226
INTO A TRAILER PARK
IN THE PROJECTS.
1368
00:51:39,270 --> 00:51:42,273
HEY! Y'ALL
THE NEIGHBORS?
1369
00:51:42,316 --> 00:51:46,494
WELL, COME ON OVER
TO THE COOKOUT.
1370
00:51:46,538 --> 00:51:47,800
NO.
MMM-MM.
1371
00:51:47,843 --> 00:51:50,585
NO, COME ON!
COME ON!
1372
00:51:50,629 --> 00:51:52,152
WHOO!
1373
00:51:52,196 --> 00:51:54,023
EILEEN...
1374
00:51:54,067 --> 00:51:56,678
I'M COMING FOR YOU.
1375
00:51:56,722 --> 00:51:59,681
[DOG BARKING]
1376
00:51:59,725 --> 00:52:01,770
WAIT! GUINEVERE!
1377
00:52:01,814 --> 00:52:03,337
GOOD AFTERNOON,
SIR.
1378
00:52:03,381 --> 00:52:05,122
HOW MAY
I HELP YOU?
1379
00:52:05,165 --> 00:52:06,601
THAT'S MY WIFE.
1380
00:52:06,645 --> 00:52:08,255
Emma: JEEVES,
LET HIM IN.
1381
00:52:08,299 --> 00:52:10,214
YOU MUST BE HOLSTEAD.
1382
00:52:10,257 --> 00:52:11,650
COME ON IN AND JOIN US.
1383
00:52:11,693 --> 00:52:13,956
I'M LADY EM.
YOU CAN CALL ME EMMA.
1384
00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:16,742
AND THIS IS LIL DEE.
1385
00:52:16,785 --> 00:52:17,612
HEY.
1386
00:52:17,656 --> 00:52:19,614
AND THESE ARE
HER CHILDREN.
1387
00:52:19,658 --> 00:52:21,747
THIS IS SONNY RAY,
LITTLE RAY, D.J.,
1388
00:52:21,790 --> 00:52:24,184
SONNY D., D.Q.R.S.,
WHATEVER.
1389
00:52:24,228 --> 00:52:26,447
SO MANY OF YOU.
1390
00:52:30,190 --> 00:52:30,843
WHOO.
1391
00:52:30,886 --> 00:52:32,192
IT'S SO HOT
IN HERE.
1392
00:52:32,236 --> 00:52:34,586
HERE'S YOUR HAM, WITH ALL
THE SALT AND THE FAT
1393
00:52:34,629 --> 00:52:37,371
AND THE ARTERY-CLOGGING
GOODNESS THAT YOU LOVE.
1394
00:52:37,415 --> 00:52:40,548
AND NOW MY DRESS
SMELLS LIKE HAM.
1395
00:52:40,592 --> 00:52:42,289
SO EXCUSE ME.
1396
00:52:42,333 --> 00:52:43,334
OH, HONEY.
1397
00:52:43,377 --> 00:52:44,726
THIS IS
A BONELESS HAM.
1398
00:52:44,770 --> 00:52:48,208
YES. YES. THAT IS
A BONELESS HAM.
1399
00:52:48,252 --> 00:52:50,210
OH, HONEY,
IT'S THE BONE
1400
00:52:50,254 --> 00:52:51,559
THAT GIVES THE HAM
THE FLAVOR.
1401
00:52:51,603 --> 00:52:53,257
THIS WILL NEVER DO.
1402
00:52:53,300 --> 00:52:55,215
YOU'RE KIDDING,
RIGHT?
1403
00:52:55,259 --> 00:52:57,565
NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.
NOW LISTEN.
1404
00:52:57,609 --> 00:52:59,350
YOU WOULDN'T WANT
TODD TO LOSE THIS DEAL
1405
00:52:59,393 --> 00:53:02,962
BECAUSE OF THE WRONG HAM
NOW, WOULD YOU? HA HA.
1406
00:53:03,005 --> 00:53:04,442
NO, I WOULDN'T.
1407
00:53:04,485 --> 00:53:06,444
NO, I DIDN'T THINK SO.
1408
00:53:06,487 --> 00:53:07,662
NOW LISTEN, SWEETIE.
1409
00:53:07,706 --> 00:53:09,708
ABOUT 25 MILES
DOWN THE ROAD THERE,
1410
00:53:09,751 --> 00:53:11,449
THERE'S A GOOD BUTCHER.
1411
00:53:11,492 --> 00:53:14,974
GET YOU A GOOD HAM,
ALL RIGHT?
1412
00:53:15,017 --> 00:53:16,715
MM-HMM.
ALL RIGHT?
1413
00:53:16,758 --> 00:53:18,020
NOW, I'M
NOT QUITE SURE
1414
00:53:18,064 --> 00:53:19,848
I UNDERSTAND WHAT
YOU'RE GETTING AT.
1415
00:53:19,892 --> 00:53:22,111
OK, LADY, LET ME
BREAK IT DOWN
1416
00:53:22,155 --> 00:53:23,330
FOR YOU, ALL RIGHT?
1417
00:53:23,374 --> 00:53:25,680
IF A BLACK CAT
CROSSES YOUR PATH,
1418
00:53:25,724 --> 00:53:26,768
THAT MEANS WHAT?
1419
00:53:26,812 --> 00:53:28,683
7 YEARS BAD LUCK,
RIGHT? ALL RIGHT.
1420
00:53:28,727 --> 00:53:31,817
NOW, WHAT'S SLANG
FOR A DUDE? A CAT.
1421
00:53:31,860 --> 00:53:34,950
SO ERGO, I.E.,
I AM A BLACK CAT.
1422
00:53:34,994 --> 00:53:37,039
SO IF I CROSS
YOUR PATH,
1423
00:53:37,083 --> 00:53:38,258
YOU SUBLIMINALLY
THINK
1424
00:53:38,302 --> 00:53:40,521
THAT YOU'RE GONNA
GET BAD LUCK.
1425
00:53:40,565 --> 00:53:42,567
THAT IS WHY
MY WIFE LEFT ME,
1426
00:53:42,610 --> 00:53:44,221
BECAUSE I'M BLACK.
1427
00:53:44,264 --> 00:53:45,657
IS HE SERIOUS?
1428
00:53:45,700 --> 00:53:47,746
OH, YEAH. SEE,
AT EVERY FAMILY COOKOUT,
1429
00:53:47,789 --> 00:53:50,009
WE GET CAUGHT UP
ON EACH OTHER'S LIVES,
1430
00:53:50,052 --> 00:53:52,054
NO MATTER
HOW SAD THEY ARE.
1431
00:53:52,098 --> 00:53:54,796
SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES--
THEY'RE ALL AROUND US.
1432
00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:56,668
YOU KNOW,
LIKE IN SPORTS.
1433
00:53:56,711 --> 00:53:58,278
LIKE HOCKEY.
WHY IS THERE
1434
00:53:58,322 --> 00:53:59,584
A BUNCH OF WHITE GUYS
1435
00:53:59,627 --> 00:54:01,281
SMACKING A BLACK PUCK
AROUND THE ICE?
1436
00:54:01,325 --> 00:54:03,892
WHY CAN'T THE PUCK
BE WHITE?
1437
00:54:04,415 --> 00:54:06,330
WELL, BEING IN
SPORTS MANAGEMENT,
1438
00:54:06,373 --> 00:54:08,767
I'D VENTURE TO SAY
THAT ON ICE,
1439
00:54:08,810 --> 00:54:12,423
A WHITE PUCK MIGHT
BE DIFFICULT TO SEE.
1440
00:54:12,466 --> 00:54:15,382
I'D EXPECT YOU TO SAY THAT.
1441
00:54:15,426 --> 00:54:17,471
WAIT A MINUTE, LEROY.
WHAT ABOUT GOLF?
1442
00:54:17,515 --> 00:54:19,386
I MEAN, THE BALL
IS WHITE.
1443
00:54:19,430 --> 00:54:21,170
YEAH. YOU KNOW,
YOU'RE RIGHT.
1444
00:54:21,214 --> 00:54:22,520
AND I THOUGHT
ABOUT THAT.
1445
00:54:22,563 --> 00:54:23,912
IN GOLF, YOU
GOT TO DO WHAT?
1446
00:54:23,956 --> 00:54:26,828
GET THAT WHITE BALL
IN THE HOLE.
1447
00:54:26,872 --> 00:54:29,831
WHERE'S THE HOLE?
ON THE GREEN.
1448
00:54:29,875 --> 00:54:31,442
GREEN. "FERTILITY."
1449
00:54:31,485 --> 00:54:33,226
YOU SEE WHAT I'M
GETTING AT HERE?
1450
00:54:33,270 --> 00:54:35,837
WHERE'S THAT HOLE?
IN THE EARTH.
1451
00:54:35,881 --> 00:54:40,102
MOTHER EARTH.
"HI, MOMMY." YEAH.
1452
00:54:40,146 --> 00:54:41,539
WHITE GUYS
TRYING TO GET
1453
00:54:41,582 --> 00:54:43,236
THEIR WHITE BALLS
IN MOTHER EARTH,
1454
00:54:43,280 --> 00:54:47,022
SYMBOLIZING HOW THEY
WANT TO RAPE THE PLANET.
1455
00:54:47,066 --> 00:54:51,288
I SHOULD WRITE
A BOOK, MAN.
1456
00:54:51,766 --> 00:54:53,333
"THAT HAM HAS
TOO MUCH SALT IN IT.
1457
00:54:53,377 --> 00:54:55,335
"NO, THAT HAM
HAS TOO MUCH BONE IN IT.
1458
00:54:55,379 --> 00:54:59,426
NO, THAT HAM HAS
TOO MUCH PORK IN IT."
1459
00:55:01,428 --> 00:55:03,691
KEEP IT TOGETHER.
1460
00:55:03,735 --> 00:55:04,779
[EXHALES]
1461
00:55:04,823 --> 00:55:06,346
NOW, WHAT YOU'RE
GONNA DO IS,
1462
00:55:06,390 --> 00:55:08,043
YOU'RE GONNA GO GET
THE DAMN HAM FOR HER,
1463
00:55:08,087 --> 00:55:11,395
AND ONCE ALL THESE GHETTO
HOOD RATS ARE OUT OF MY HOUSE,
1464
00:55:11,438 --> 00:55:13,353
WE'RE GONNA GET IT
FUMIGATED.
1465
00:55:13,397 --> 00:55:16,791
THEN I WILL HAVE TODD
ALL TO MYSELF.
1466
00:55:23,711 --> 00:55:26,888
WHAT'S UP,
GOLD DIGGER?
1467
00:55:31,893 --> 00:55:33,634
EXCUSE ME...
1468
00:55:33,678 --> 00:55:36,507
BUT I AM NOT
IN THE MOOD.
1469
00:55:36,550 --> 00:55:38,552
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M NOT EVEN MAD.
1470
00:55:38,596 --> 00:55:40,598
GAME RECOGNIZE
GAME, HONEY.
1471
00:55:40,641 --> 00:55:43,340
GAME RECOGNIZES
GAME?
1472
00:55:43,383 --> 00:55:45,167
LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHING.
1473
00:55:45,211 --> 00:55:46,473
YOUR GAME IS NOT
1474
00:55:46,517 --> 00:55:48,127
UP TO PAR
WITH MY GAME.
1475
00:55:48,170 --> 00:55:49,389
WHAT IS IT,
LIKE, 5 OR 6
1476
00:55:49,433 --> 00:55:51,478
LIL DEE-DEES I SEE
RUNNING AROUND HERE?
1477
00:55:51,522 --> 00:55:53,393
AND THAT OLD-ASS
SCOOBY DOO VAN
1478
00:55:53,437 --> 00:55:55,482
THAT YOU'VE BEEN
DRIVING AROUND.
1479
00:55:55,526 --> 00:55:57,876
YEAH. I SEEN IT.
1480
00:55:57,919 --> 00:55:59,573
NOW, I DRIVE
1481
00:55:59,617 --> 00:56:02,663
A BRAND-NEW
MERCEDES BENZ.
1482
00:56:02,707 --> 00:56:05,013
AND THIS
IS MY MANSION.
1483
00:56:05,057 --> 00:56:07,581
THAT'S ALL
FINE AND DANDY,
1484
00:56:07,625 --> 00:56:10,149
BUT I CATCH YOUR
LITTLE TRIFLING TAIL
1485
00:56:10,192 --> 00:56:11,585
TRYING TO PLAY
MY COUSIN,
1486
00:56:11,629 --> 00:56:14,283
AND I'LL CUT
YOUR ASS.
1487
00:56:14,327 --> 00:56:15,676
OH, AND BY THE WAY,
1488
00:56:15,720 --> 00:56:18,766
THAT TIRED LITTLE DRESS
YOU'RE TRYING TO ROCK,
1489
00:56:18,810 --> 00:56:20,768
WE ALL KNOW
THAT AIN'T REAL.
1490
00:56:20,812 --> 00:56:22,379
POCAHONTAS JUST
TRYING TO FRONT,
1491
00:56:22,422 --> 00:56:24,772
ACTING LIKE SHE GOT
INDIAN IN HER FAMILY.
1492
00:56:24,816 --> 00:56:26,600
LITTLE BIT CHEROKEE.
1493
00:56:26,644 --> 00:56:29,037
CHEROKEE?
1494
00:56:29,647 --> 00:56:31,126
LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHING.
1495
00:56:31,170 --> 00:56:32,998
YOU NEED NOT WORRY
ABOUT YOUR COUSIN,
1496
00:56:33,041 --> 00:56:34,695
BECAUSE YOUR COUSIN
IS MY PROBLEM.
1497
00:56:34,739 --> 00:56:37,394
I'M GONNA TAKE REAL
GOOD CARE OF HIM.
1498
00:56:37,437 --> 00:56:39,700
WHAT YOU NEED TO DO
IS STOP LOOKING FOR
1499
00:56:39,744 --> 00:56:41,833
YOUR BABIES' DADDIES
1500
00:56:41,876 --> 00:56:44,096
DOWN AT
THE PAROLE OFFICE.
1501
00:56:44,139 --> 00:56:46,054
AND YOU, LITTLE
GHETTO BIRD,
1502
00:56:46,098 --> 00:56:50,537
NEED TO INVEST
IN A DIAPHRAGM.
1503
00:56:53,105 --> 00:56:54,323
[HORN HONKS]
1504
00:56:54,367 --> 00:56:55,673
LOOKIE HERE, BLING.
1505
00:56:55,716 --> 00:56:57,588
LOOK WHAT
WE HAVE HERE.
1506
00:56:57,631 --> 00:56:59,328
Man: YOU FELLAS
NEED A LIFT?
1507
00:56:59,372 --> 00:57:03,158
HELL, YEAH. COME ON, WHEEZE.
LET'S GET IN.
1508
00:57:03,202 --> 00:57:06,118
YOU KNOW, I DON'T MIND
PICKING YOU BOYS UP,
1509
00:57:06,161 --> 00:57:08,555
BECAUSE I KNOW
HOW IT CAN BE.
1510
00:57:08,599 --> 00:57:09,817
RIGHT ON.
1511
00:57:09,861 --> 00:57:12,124
I'M IN THE HORSE MANURE
CONSIGNMENT BUSINESS,
1512
00:57:12,167 --> 00:57:15,170
A MANURE BROKER,
IF YOU DON'T MIND.
1513
00:57:15,214 --> 00:57:19,218
BASICALLY, I GO AROUND
TO ALL THE RANCHES,
1514
00:57:19,261 --> 00:57:20,741
I SCOOP UP
THE HORSE...
1515
00:57:20,785 --> 00:57:21,829
AND I SELL IT
1516
00:57:21,873 --> 00:57:23,483
TO ALL THE FARMERS
AND THE LANDSCAPERS.
1517
00:57:23,527 --> 00:57:24,658
THIS STUFF RIGHT HERE.
1518
00:57:24,702 --> 00:57:26,443
AND IF MY TRUCK
BREAKS DOWN,
1519
00:57:26,486 --> 00:57:27,748
LET ME TELL
YOU, GOD,
1520
00:57:27,792 --> 00:57:31,317
NOBODY'S GONNA
PICK UP THIS GUY.
1521
00:57:32,318 --> 00:57:34,146
YOU WANT SOME?
1522
00:57:34,189 --> 00:57:34,973
NO.
1523
00:57:35,016 --> 00:57:35,930
GOOD. YOU OK?
1524
00:57:35,974 --> 00:57:37,845
NOW, LET ME
TELL YOU SOMETHING.
1525
00:57:37,889 --> 00:57:39,238
THERE'S A DEMAND
1526
00:57:39,281 --> 00:57:41,283
FOR GOOD-QUALITY...
1527
00:57:41,327 --> 00:57:43,547
I TELL THE FARMERS,
1528
00:57:43,590 --> 00:57:45,766
MAKE SURE
YOU FEED YOUR HORSES
1529
00:57:45,810 --> 00:57:47,899
A WELL-BALANCED
DIET.
1530
00:57:47,942 --> 00:57:49,378
ANY DOCTOR
WILL TELL YOU,
1531
00:57:49,422 --> 00:57:50,510
IF YOU PUT
GOOD STUFF IN,
1532
00:57:50,554 --> 00:57:53,121
GOOD STUFF IS DEFINITELY
GONNA COME OUT.
1533
00:57:53,165 --> 00:57:55,994
THAT'S IT! STOP THE CAR!
1534
00:57:56,037 --> 00:57:57,561
STOP THE CAR!
1535
00:57:57,604 --> 00:58:00,607
AND DON'T SAY...
ELSE ABOUT...
1536
00:58:00,651 --> 00:58:03,349
COME ON, WHEEZE!
GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!
1537
00:58:03,392 --> 00:58:05,220
HEY.
1538
00:58:09,355 --> 00:58:10,617
Todd: DEE, YOU NEED
TO CHECK YOUR KIDS.
1539
00:58:10,661 --> 00:58:12,967
THEY'RE SCRATCHING UP MY STAIRS.
LOOK AT THIS.
1540
00:58:13,011 --> 00:58:14,926
Boy: OH, MAN, WE CAN'T
DO NOTHING OVER HERE.
1541
00:58:14,969 --> 00:58:16,275
I SHOULDN'T HAVE
NEVER CAME HERE.
1542
00:58:16,318 --> 00:58:18,495
I SHOULD HAVE WENT
TO LEBRON JAMES' HOUSE.
1543
00:58:18,538 --> 00:58:20,975
I KNOW THAT'S RIGHT.
1544
00:58:21,019 --> 00:58:21,846
DISRESPECTFUL.
1545
00:58:21,889 --> 00:58:23,630
BOY, YOU WORRY
TOO DAMN MUCH.
1546
00:58:23,674 --> 00:58:25,023
ALL THIS RUNNING-AROUND
THEY DOING,
1547
00:58:25,066 --> 00:58:27,547
THEY'RE GONNA START DROPPING
LIKE FLIES IN A MINUTE.
1548
00:58:27,591 --> 00:58:28,548
JUST CHILL.
1549
00:58:28,592 --> 00:58:29,854
I TRIED
TELLING HER, TODD,
1550
00:58:29,897 --> 00:58:31,377
BUT YOU KNOW, SOME PEOPLE
ARE JUST UNCIVILIZED.
1551
00:58:31,420 --> 00:58:36,164
LEROY, LEROY, LOOK WHAT THEY DID
TO MY DAMN BAT.
1552
00:58:36,208 --> 00:58:38,950
I'M COMING TO GET YOU!
1553
00:58:42,040 --> 00:58:43,520
GRANDPA!
1554
00:58:43,563 --> 00:58:45,347
AUNT NETTIE, COULD YOU PLEASE
KEEP THESE KIDS OUT OF HERE?
1555
00:58:45,391 --> 00:58:49,134
MY AGENT AND I ARE TRYING
TO DO SOME BUSINESS.
1556
00:58:49,177 --> 00:58:50,439
OK.
1557
00:58:50,483 --> 00:58:51,876
PLEASE. JUST...
1558
00:58:51,919 --> 00:58:53,921
CALM DOWN, HONEY.
1559
00:58:53,965 --> 00:58:55,923
AGENT.
1560
00:58:55,967 --> 00:58:57,403
CHECK.
1561
00:58:57,446 --> 00:58:58,273
GOOD JOB.
1562
00:58:58,317 --> 00:59:00,580
Nettie: JAMAL!
JAMAL! JAMAL!
1563
00:59:00,624 --> 00:59:04,062
TODD'S AGENT IS HERE,
AND BABY, IF HE SEES YOU PLAY,
1564
00:59:04,105 --> 00:59:06,978
I KNOW WE CAN GET
A CONTRACT,
1565
00:59:07,021 --> 00:59:08,762
MAYBE EVEN BIGGER
THAN TODD'S.
1566
00:59:08,806 --> 00:59:11,809
MOM, LOOK. I GOT
CHECKMATE IN ONE MOVE.
1567
00:59:11,852 --> 00:59:14,333
AND HOW MANY TIMES
I GOT TO TELL YOU?
1568
00:59:14,376 --> 00:59:17,379
I'M NOT TRYING
TO PLAY PRO BALL.
1569
00:59:17,423 --> 00:59:19,512
WELL, YOU JUST
CHECK THAT, BABY.
1570
00:59:19,556 --> 00:59:22,167
NOW, I WANT YOU
TO GET DRESSED NOW!
1571
00:59:22,210 --> 00:59:23,298
NO EXCUSES!
1572
00:59:23,342 --> 00:59:26,084
NETTIE, NOW JAMAL HAS
A LIFE OF HIS OWN
1573
00:59:26,127 --> 00:59:27,999
THAT DOESN'T INCLUDE
PRO BASKETBALL.
1574
00:59:28,042 --> 00:59:29,914
WE DIDN'T COME HERE
FOR A TRYOUT.
1575
00:59:29,957 --> 00:59:31,524
WE CAME HERE
FOR A COOKOUT.
1576
00:59:31,568 --> 00:59:33,526
WHEN'S THAT FOOD
GONNA BE READY?
1577
00:59:33,570 --> 00:59:34,527
QUIET, FRANK!
1578
00:59:34,571 --> 00:59:35,833
IF YOU'D
SPENT MORE TIME
1579
00:59:35,876 --> 00:59:37,182
TEACHING YOUR SON
HOW TO PLAY
1580
00:59:37,225 --> 00:59:38,313
INSTEAD OF FEEDING
YOUR FACE,
1581
00:59:38,357 --> 00:59:39,619
I WOULDN'T EVEN HAVE
TO BE DOING THIS!
1582
00:59:39,663 --> 00:59:42,796
MAMA'S GONNA GET
HER BABY A CONTRACT
1583
00:59:42,840 --> 00:59:44,363
WHETHER HE
WANTS ONE OR NOT!
1584
00:59:44,406 --> 00:59:46,844
YOU, GO GET
YOUR SWEATS ON!
1585
00:59:46,887 --> 00:59:47,758
NOW!
1586
00:59:47,801 --> 00:59:50,282
THE BOY AIN'T EVEN
GOT A HOOP.
1587
00:59:50,325 --> 00:59:51,413
NICE AND QUIET.
1588
00:59:51,457 --> 00:59:53,111
AWAY FROM ALL THE INSANITY.
HAVE A SEAT.
1589
00:59:53,154 --> 00:59:56,897
WE ARE SO SORRY ABOUT
ALL THE DISTRACTIONS.
1590
00:59:56,941 --> 00:59:58,638
I ASSURE YOU,
THIS FAMILY GATHERING
1591
00:59:58,682 --> 01:00:00,858
WAS A COMPLETE
SCHEDULING MISHAP.
1592
01:00:00,901 --> 01:00:02,033
IT'S OK.
1593
01:00:02,076 --> 01:00:03,600
I'M RATHER
ENJOYING MYSELF.
1594
01:00:03,643 --> 01:00:05,427
ARE YOU? IT'S FUN, RIGHT?
COOKOUTS ARE FUN.
1595
01:00:05,471 --> 01:00:07,995
ANYWAY, LET'S TALK ABOUT
THE NEW PRODUCT LAUNCH, OK?
1596
01:00:08,039 --> 01:00:11,564
WE KNOW THAT THIS IS
VERY IMPORTANT FOR YOUR COMPANY,
1597
01:00:11,608 --> 01:00:13,000
AND WE THINK
THAT TODD WOULD BE
1598
01:00:13,044 --> 01:00:14,567
ABSOLUTELY PERFECT.
PICTURE IT--
1599
01:00:14,611 --> 01:00:16,830
YOUNG ROOKIE,
OUT ON THE ROAD,
1600
01:00:16,874 --> 01:00:18,397
MISSING HIS FAMILY,
1601
01:00:18,440 --> 01:00:22,183
NEEDING YOUR SERVICE
TO STAY IN TOUCH WITH THEM.
1602
01:00:22,227 --> 01:00:23,881
[GLASS SHATTERS]
1603
01:00:23,924 --> 01:00:25,317
GOD!
1604
01:00:25,360 --> 01:00:27,406
Man: STOP SWINGING THAT BAT!
SOMEBODY'S GONNA GET HURT!
1605
01:00:27,449 --> 01:00:29,190
EXCUSE ME FOR A MINUTE,
MS. PETERS.
1606
01:00:29,234 --> 01:00:30,670
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
1607
01:00:30,714 --> 01:00:32,193
YEAH, YEAH.
1608
01:00:32,237 --> 01:00:34,413
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
1609
01:00:34,456 --> 01:00:36,502
FOUL! FOUL!
Y'ALL SAW IT!
1610
01:00:36,545 --> 01:00:38,069
IT'S MY BAT!
MY BAT!
1611
01:00:38,112 --> 01:00:40,985
GRANDPA, PLEASE, PLEASE,
PLEASE, NOT IN THE HOUSE.
1612
01:00:41,028 --> 01:00:42,595
PLEASE, NOT IN THE HOUSE.
1613
01:00:42,639 --> 01:00:44,466
RULES!
RULES! RULES!
1614
01:00:44,510 --> 01:00:46,512
EVERYBODY ALWAYS
TELLING KIDS
1615
01:00:46,555 --> 01:00:48,949
AND OLD FOLKS
WHAT TO DO.
1616
01:00:48,993 --> 01:00:50,908
COME ON, KIDS.
LET'S GO.
1617
01:00:50,951 --> 01:00:53,432
WE'LL SHOW THEM.
COME ON.
1618
01:00:53,475 --> 01:00:54,999
WE'RE GOING
OUTSIDE
1619
01:00:55,042 --> 01:00:57,392
AND POO-POO
ON OURSELVES.
1620
01:00:57,436 --> 01:00:59,612
OH, GOD.
1621
01:01:00,918 --> 01:01:03,834
EW...GOD.
1622
01:01:03,877 --> 01:01:05,052
OH...
1623
01:01:05,096 --> 01:01:07,576
I LOVE YOU,
UNCLE TODD.
1624
01:01:07,620 --> 01:01:10,014
I LOVE YOU, TOO, MAN. OH...
1625
01:01:10,057 --> 01:01:11,276
WHAT'S UP?
1626
01:01:11,319 --> 01:01:12,843
DO YOU SEE
THAT POODLE?
1627
01:01:12,886 --> 01:01:14,453
WHOSE DOG IS THAT?
1628
01:01:14,496 --> 01:01:17,935
YO, I'M GONNA GIVE
IT SOME COOKIES.
1629
01:01:18,849 --> 01:01:20,241
COME HERE, GIRL.
1630
01:01:20,285 --> 01:01:23,854
GIVE ME ONE, MAN.
LET ME TRY. GIVE ME ONE.
1631
01:01:23,897 --> 01:01:24,985
HERE, MAN.
1632
01:01:25,029 --> 01:01:26,900
I AIN'T GIVING MY COOKIE
TO NO DOG, MAN.
1633
01:01:26,944 --> 01:01:29,294
YOU MUST BE CRAZY.
1634
01:01:29,337 --> 01:01:32,253
OK, THIS IS IT, BABY.
TAKE IT TO THE HOOP.
1635
01:01:32,297 --> 01:01:34,778
TAKE IT TO THE HOOP.
THIS IS IT.
1636
01:01:34,821 --> 01:01:36,562
MA, YOU CANNOT
BE SERIOUS.
1637
01:01:36,605 --> 01:01:38,303
WHERE AM I
GONNA PLAY BALL?
1638
01:01:38,346 --> 01:01:40,566
THERE'S NO BASKET
IN HERE.
1639
01:01:40,609 --> 01:01:41,872
YOU WANT A BASKET?
1640
01:01:41,915 --> 01:01:44,135
THERE'S YOUR BASKET.
1641
01:01:44,178 --> 01:01:46,746
"D" UP, LEROY.
NO EASY BUCKETS.
1642
01:01:46,790 --> 01:01:49,053
WELL, YOU DON'T HAVE
TO WORRY ABOUT THAT,
1643
01:01:49,096 --> 01:01:52,230
BECAUSE I'M ALREADY...
I'M UP IN HERE.
1644
01:01:52,796 --> 01:01:55,146
UP IN HERE, BABY.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
1645
01:01:55,189 --> 01:01:57,452
COME ON, BOY.
SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT.
1646
01:01:57,496 --> 01:01:59,280
COME ON.
1647
01:02:00,107 --> 01:02:02,370
COME ON.
YOU READY FOR ME?
1648
01:02:02,414 --> 01:02:04,329
DON'T TRY TO GO LEFT.
DON'T GO LEFT.
1649
01:02:04,372 --> 01:02:06,374
I'M TELLING YOU--
1650
01:02:09,726 --> 01:02:10,552
YES!
1651
01:02:10,596 --> 01:02:12,293
THAT'S MY BOY!
THAT'S MY BOY!
1652
01:02:12,337 --> 01:02:14,600
DID YOU SEE HOW HE
HANDLED THAT BALL?
1653
01:02:14,643 --> 01:02:15,470
YOU CANNOT TELL ME
1654
01:02:15,514 --> 01:02:16,733
THAT MY BABY
DON'T HAVE GAME.
1655
01:02:16,776 --> 01:02:18,691
SO, WHAT
DO YOU THINK?
1656
01:02:18,735 --> 01:02:19,823
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
1657
01:02:19,866 --> 01:02:21,781
I THINK...WOW.
OH, MY GOD. I GOT A CALL.
1658
01:02:21,825 --> 01:02:23,174
YOU DON'T KNOW
NOTHING.
1659
01:02:23,217 --> 01:02:27,874
MY JAMAL, HE SHOULD BE
PLAYING IN THE PROS!
1660
01:02:27,918 --> 01:02:30,877
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1661
01:02:30,921 --> 01:02:31,791
OH, YEAH.
1662
01:02:31,835 --> 01:02:33,010
THAT'S WHAT
I'M TALKING ABOUT.
1663
01:02:33,053 --> 01:02:34,968
YOU THINK THAT'S ENOUGH
OF THIS IN THERE?
1664
01:02:35,012 --> 01:02:37,188
DAMN! WHAT
DO YOU WANT NOW?
1665
01:02:37,231 --> 01:02:38,755
DID YOU READ THE RULES
AND REGULATIONS?
1666
01:02:38,798 --> 01:02:40,669
BECAUSE I CAN SEE ABOUT
10 VIOLATIONS IN HERE,
1667
01:02:40,713 --> 01:02:42,584
AND I AIN'T EVEN
UP IN HERE GOOD.
1668
01:02:42,628 --> 01:02:45,109
YOU ARE WAY OVER THE ALLOWED
AMOUNT OF VISITORS.
1669
01:02:45,152 --> 01:02:46,545
YOU'RE TOO LOUD.
1670
01:02:46,588 --> 01:02:48,808
AND DO I SMELL A GRILL?
1671
01:02:48,852 --> 01:02:52,551
OH, NO. YOU NEED A PERMIT
TO COOK OUTDOORS.
1672
01:02:52,594 --> 01:02:53,595
IT'S JUST A COOKOUT.
1673
01:02:53,639 --> 01:02:54,814
WE AIN'T
BOTHERING NOBODY!
1674
01:02:54,858 --> 01:02:56,860
LOOK, YOUNGBLOOD,
BACK THE HELL UP.
1675
01:02:56,903 --> 01:02:57,948
NOW, LOOK,
MR. ANDERSEN,
1676
01:02:57,991 --> 01:02:59,340
YOU BETTER GET
YOUR FAMILY TOGETHER,
1677
01:02:59,384 --> 01:03:02,691
OR YOUR TIME AT GARDEN RIDGE
WILL BE OVER REAL SOON.
1678
01:03:02,735 --> 01:03:04,955
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1679
01:03:17,315 --> 01:03:19,752
THAT'S IT. THAT'S IT.
THAT'S IT.
1680
01:03:19,796 --> 01:03:21,972
EVERYBODY GET OUT!
AFTER THIS FOOD IS DONE,
1681
01:03:22,015 --> 01:03:23,843
GET A DOGGY BAG
AND GET OUT!
1682
01:03:23,887 --> 01:03:27,368
HEY, MAN, WHY DON'T
YOU CALM DOWN, MAN?
1683
01:03:27,412 --> 01:03:29,109
YOU TRIPPIN'.
1684
01:03:29,153 --> 01:03:31,372
WHAT IS WRONG
WITH YOU? YOU--
1685
01:03:31,416 --> 01:03:33,418
HEY, YOU HEAR ME
TALKING?
1686
01:03:33,461 --> 01:03:35,812
DON'T TURN
YOUR BACK ON ME.
1687
01:03:37,378 --> 01:03:38,597
JOJO.
1688
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:40,729
YEAH. IT'S
ALL RIGHT, BABY.
1689
01:03:40,773 --> 01:03:42,688
WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM?
1690
01:03:42,731 --> 01:03:44,255
IT'S ALL RIGHT,
BABY.
1691
01:03:44,298 --> 01:03:46,300
IT'S OK.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
1692
01:03:46,344 --> 01:03:47,824
HE'S GONNA BE
ALL RIGHT.
1693
01:03:47,867 --> 01:03:50,609
WHAT'S WRONG
WITH HIM?
1694
01:04:01,141 --> 01:04:03,274
[CLEARS THROAT]
1695
01:04:03,317 --> 01:04:04,884
I HATE TO INTERRUPT,
1696
01:04:04,928 --> 01:04:09,280
BUT HAVE EITHER OF YOU
SEEN MY DOG? GUINEVERE.
1697
01:04:09,323 --> 01:04:10,542
GUINEVERE.
1698
01:04:10,585 --> 01:04:13,458
I'VE BEEN LOOKING
FOR YOU.
1699
01:04:13,501 --> 01:04:16,461
IN THE HOUSE, GUINEVERE.
1700
01:04:18,071 --> 01:04:19,856
[SNIFFING]
1701
01:04:19,899 --> 01:04:21,074
OH, NO.
1702
01:04:21,118 --> 01:04:24,164
IS THAT
WHAT I THINK IT IS?
1703
01:04:24,208 --> 01:04:25,339
YEAH.
1704
01:04:25,383 --> 01:04:27,907
I'M SHOCKED
AT YOU TWO YOUNG MEN.
1705
01:04:27,951 --> 01:04:29,517
SO AM I.
1706
01:04:29,561 --> 01:04:30,910
WE'RE SORRY.
1707
01:04:30,954 --> 01:04:33,260
I WEEP
FOR YOUR GENERATION.
1708
01:04:33,304 --> 01:04:35,480
IN MY DAY...
1709
01:04:35,523 --> 01:04:41,181
NO ONE WOULD CONSIDER BAKING
WITH INFERIOR INGREDIENTS.
1710
01:04:41,225 --> 01:04:44,271
TAKE THE HIGH ROAD,
MY SONS.
1711
01:04:44,315 --> 01:04:48,493
THERE'S NO SUCH THING
AS AN...EASY BAKE.
1712
01:04:48,536 --> 01:04:52,062
HA HA HA. YEAH.
1713
01:04:52,105 --> 01:04:54,586
LIGHT 'EM UP.
LIGHT 'EM UP.
1714
01:04:54,629 --> 01:04:56,675
[LAUGHTER]
1715
01:04:58,720 --> 01:05:01,245
I CAN'T FEEL
MY FACE, MAN.
1716
01:05:01,288 --> 01:05:02,986
AH, WHO WOULD
HAVE THOUGHT
1717
01:05:03,029 --> 01:05:05,684
THAT A STRAIGHT-LACED
DUDE LIKE YOU
1718
01:05:05,727 --> 01:05:07,468
WOULD ENJOY
GETTING A LIFT? MAN.
1719
01:05:07,512 --> 01:05:09,557
I USED TO LIKE TO DO
A LOT OF THINGS
1720
01:05:09,601 --> 01:05:11,864
BEFORE I MARRIED
MRS. CROWLEY--
1721
01:05:11,908 --> 01:05:13,735
DRINK MALT LIQUOR,
1722
01:05:13,779 --> 01:05:16,869
LISTEN TO RAP MUSIC...
1723
01:05:16,913 --> 01:05:18,218
EAT OREO COOKIES.
1724
01:05:18,262 --> 01:05:20,133
OH, I KNOW
THAT ONE.
1725
01:05:20,177 --> 01:05:21,178
[LAUGHTER]
1726
01:05:21,221 --> 01:05:22,962
IF SHE'S SUCH
A BUZZ-KILL THEN,
1727
01:05:23,006 --> 01:05:24,746
MAN, WHY DID YOU
MARRY HER?
1728
01:05:24,790 --> 01:05:26,487
IT WAS A GOOD
BUSINESS DECISION.
1729
01:05:26,531 --> 01:05:28,359
SEE, SHE COMES
FROM MONEY,
1730
01:05:28,402 --> 01:05:33,016
AND WHERE I WAS RAISED,
MONEY MARRIES MONEY.
1731
01:05:33,059 --> 01:05:34,234
YEAH,
BUT THEM TITS
1732
01:05:34,278 --> 01:05:35,627
IS NICE, TOO,
THOUGH, HUH?
1733
01:05:35,670 --> 01:05:38,499
WHAT ABOUT THEM NIPPLES?
SHE GOT SOME LITTLE RAISINS
1734
01:05:38,543 --> 01:05:40,849
OR SOME NICE
BIG GUMDROPS?
1735
01:05:40,893 --> 01:05:43,417
THAT'S MY WIFE
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
1736
01:05:43,461 --> 01:05:45,071
OH, MY BAD, MAN.
1737
01:05:45,115 --> 01:05:47,073
SORRY.
1738
01:05:50,120 --> 01:05:51,860
OK.
1739
01:05:51,904 --> 01:05:52,905
GUMDROPS.
1740
01:05:52,949 --> 01:05:55,952
I KNEW IT! I SEEN THEM
IN HER SHIRT!
1741
01:06:02,480 --> 01:06:04,264
YOU MIND IF I HELP?
1742
01:06:04,308 --> 01:06:07,180
KNOCK YOURSELF OUT.
1743
01:06:08,703 --> 01:06:12,969
OH! SWEET JESUS!
1744
01:06:13,360 --> 01:06:14,579
HEY, HEY, HEY.
COME ON.
1745
01:06:14,622 --> 01:06:15,841
LET ME HELP.
LET ME HELP.
1746
01:06:15,884 --> 01:06:18,104
YOU'LL TEAR
THE THING UP.
1747
01:06:18,148 --> 01:06:19,453
IS IT COMING OUT?
1748
01:06:19,497 --> 01:06:22,108
YOU CAN PUT A FLOWER
OR SOMETHING OVER IT.
1749
01:06:22,152 --> 01:06:25,111
A FLOWER, EM?
LOOK AT THIS.
1750
01:06:25,155 --> 01:06:27,635
I GOT TO TAKE THIS
BACK TOMORROW.
1751
01:06:27,679 --> 01:06:28,636
$1,200?
1752
01:06:28,680 --> 01:06:31,988
WHY'D YOU SPEND
$1,200 ON A DRESS?
1753
01:06:32,031 --> 01:06:38,255
I WANTED TO BE MORE
FABULOUS THAN YOU, OK?
1754
01:06:38,298 --> 01:06:40,344
NETTIE, COME ON.
COME HERE.
1755
01:06:40,387 --> 01:06:43,129
COME ON. SIT DOWN.
1756
01:06:45,305 --> 01:06:49,309
GOD, NETTIE,
COME ON NOW.
1757
01:06:49,657 --> 01:06:51,572
WHEN YOU AND ME,
WE WERE COMING UP,
1758
01:06:51,616 --> 01:06:55,054
WE WERE TIGHT,
WE WERE CLOSE.
1759
01:06:55,098 --> 01:06:59,102
THEN EVERYTHING
CHANGED. EVERYTHING.
1760
01:06:59,145 --> 01:07:00,103
WHY?
1761
01:07:00,146 --> 01:07:03,410
ALL THE WHILE
WE WERE GROWING UP,
1762
01:07:03,454 --> 01:07:05,238
ALL I EVER HEARD
1763
01:07:05,282 --> 01:07:08,328
WAS HOW BEAUTIFUL
EMMA WAS
1764
01:07:08,372 --> 01:07:10,939
AND HOW SMART EMMA WAS.
1765
01:07:10,983 --> 01:07:13,551
EVEN NOW, IT'S LIKE
YOU'RE THE BETTER PARENT.
1766
01:07:13,594 --> 01:07:17,859
TODD IS HOSTING
A COOKOUT IN THIS CASTLE,
1767
01:07:17,903 --> 01:07:23,430
AND JAMAL CAN'T EVEN GET
A PRO BASKETBALL TRYOUT.
1768
01:07:23,474 --> 01:07:24,692
YOU'RE ACTING LIKE
1769
01:07:24,736 --> 01:07:26,216
THIS IS SOME KIND
OF COMPETITION.
1770
01:07:26,259 --> 01:07:29,567
JAMAL IS TOP HONORS
IN HIS CLASS, NETTIE.
1771
01:07:29,610 --> 01:07:32,700
HE'S DAMN NEAR
A STRAIGHT-A STUDENT, OK?
1772
01:07:32,744 --> 01:07:35,442
HE COULD BE A DOCTOR
OR A LAWYER.
1773
01:07:35,486 --> 01:07:37,792
YOU EVER THINK
ABOUT THAT?
1774
01:07:37,836 --> 01:07:40,360
HE COULD CHANGE
THE WORLD.
1775
01:07:40,404 --> 01:07:43,537
WOW. CHANGE
THE WORLD.
1776
01:07:43,581 --> 01:07:45,626
[DOORBELL RINGS]
1777
01:07:45,670 --> 01:07:50,109
LAWYERS AND DOCTORS
MAKE GOOD MONEY.
1778
01:07:50,153 --> 01:07:51,719
HELLO.
1779
01:07:51,763 --> 01:07:54,853
THIS AIN'T NO
COMPETITION, BUT...
1780
01:07:54,896 --> 01:07:57,334
THEY MAKE GOODMONEY.
1781
01:07:57,377 --> 01:08:00,772
Jeeves:
MISS BECKY CRUZ.
1782
01:08:00,815 --> 01:08:01,860
HEY.
1783
01:08:01,903 --> 01:08:05,081
HEY, LADY EM.
THANKS FOR INVITING ME.
1784
01:08:05,124 --> 01:08:06,778
HI, BABY.
1785
01:08:06,821 --> 01:08:08,301
YOUR MOTHER
TOLD ME
1786
01:08:08,345 --> 01:08:10,825
I'D FIND YOU
BACK HERE.
1787
01:08:10,869 --> 01:08:12,305
COOKOUT'S AROUND THE BACK.
1788
01:08:12,349 --> 01:08:16,483
JUST FOLLOW THE CIGARETTE BURNS
AND THE DOO-DOO DIAPERS.
1789
01:08:16,527 --> 01:08:18,572
YOU DON'T
RECOGNIZE ME,
1790
01:08:18,616 --> 01:08:21,444
DO YOU...
DOO-DOO HEAD?
1791
01:08:22,314 --> 01:08:23,359
DOO-DOO HEAD?
1792
01:08:23,403 --> 01:08:26,493
BUCK TEETH, BRACES,
GLASSES SO THICK
1793
01:08:26,537 --> 01:08:30,975
I COULD SEE
INTO THE FUTURE.
1794
01:08:31,019 --> 01:08:32,412
BECKY?
1795
01:08:32,456 --> 01:08:33,892
MM-HMM.
1796
01:08:33,935 --> 01:08:35,981
YO. GIRL.
1797
01:08:36,024 --> 01:08:38,113
HEY.
1798
01:08:39,506 --> 01:08:42,770
SIT DOWN. SIT DOWN.
SIT DOWN.
1799
01:08:43,684 --> 01:08:46,339
OH, MAN.
1800
01:08:46,383 --> 01:08:48,559
DAMN, GIRL!
1801
01:08:48,602 --> 01:08:50,430
YOU LOOK...
WHAT HAPPENED?
1802
01:08:50,474 --> 01:08:53,303
YOU...YOU DID
YOUR THING.
1803
01:08:53,345 --> 01:08:55,131
WHAT CAN I SAY?
1804
01:08:55,174 --> 01:08:56,741
AFTER 10 YEARS
IN BRACES,
1805
01:08:56,783 --> 01:08:59,004
I GUESS MY TEETH FINALLY
DECIDED TO COOPERATE.
1806
01:08:59,046 --> 01:09:00,484
THE LAST TIME
I SAW YOU WAS...
1807
01:09:00,527 --> 01:09:02,747
THE COOKOUT
THAT MY MOMS THREW
1808
01:09:02,790 --> 01:09:04,009
FOR ME AND JAMAL
1809
01:09:04,051 --> 01:09:05,402
BEFORE I WENT
TO RUTGERS.
1810
01:09:05,444 --> 01:09:07,839
YEAH. I JUST GRADUATED
FROM SPELLMAN.
1811
01:09:07,881 --> 01:09:09,014
CONGRATULATIONS.
1812
01:09:09,057 --> 01:09:11,886
THANKS. I JUST
MOVED BACK HOME.
1813
01:09:11,930 --> 01:09:15,238
I START AT DENTAL
SCHOOL IN THE FALL.
1814
01:09:15,281 --> 01:09:17,892
BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME.
1815
01:09:17,935 --> 01:09:19,328
LOOK AT YOU.
1816
01:09:19,372 --> 01:09:22,332
YOU'VE COME REALLY FAR,
DOO-DOO HEAD.
1817
01:09:22,375 --> 01:09:23,462
NOT FAR ENOUGH.
1818
01:09:23,506 --> 01:09:25,377
WHEN MOMS GAVE WORD
ABOUT THIS COOKOUT,
1819
01:09:25,421 --> 01:09:27,206
MY FAMILY
STARTED SHOWING UP
1820
01:09:27,250 --> 01:09:30,383
FASTER THAN ROACHES
AT A GARBAGE STRIKE.
1821
01:09:32,429 --> 01:09:34,038
[MUTTERING]
1822
01:09:34,082 --> 01:09:38,304
YO, HURRY UP.
WHAT'S TAKING YOU SO LONG?
1823
01:09:38,348 --> 01:09:41,307
YO, WHEEZE, HURRY UP
SO WE CAN GET OUT OF HERE.
1824
01:09:41,350 --> 01:09:43,569
I ALMOST GOT IT.
1825
01:09:43,613 --> 01:09:45,920
[ENGINE TURNING OVER]
1826
01:09:45,964 --> 01:09:48,618
EXCUSE ME. WHAT DO YOU
THINK YOU'RE DOING?
1827
01:09:48,662 --> 01:09:50,403
COME HERE AND SHUT UP.
1828
01:09:50,447 --> 01:09:52,710
Brittany: AAH!
PLEASE DON'T HURT ME.
1829
01:09:52,752 --> 01:09:55,408
Bling: JUST DRIVE THE CAR,
AND NOBODY WILL GET HURT.
1830
01:09:55,452 --> 01:09:56,453
OK, I WILL,
1831
01:09:56,496 --> 01:09:57,932
BUT MY BOYFRIEND'S
REALLY RICH.
1832
01:09:57,976 --> 01:09:59,543
HE'LL GIVE YOU
ANYTHING YOU WANT.
1833
01:09:59,586 --> 01:10:01,022
YOU JUST GET US
TO GARDEN RIDGE.
1834
01:10:01,066 --> 01:10:04,548
WE'LL WORRY ABOUT
YOUR BOYFRIEND LATER.
1835
01:10:04,591 --> 01:10:06,854
REMEMBER ABOUT...
2 YEARS AGO,
1836
01:10:06,898 --> 01:10:09,379
WHEN YOU WERE PLAYING
AGAINST INDIANA STATE?
1837
01:10:09,422 --> 01:10:11,946
YOU WERE STRUGGLING
THE WHOLE GAME.
1838
01:10:11,990 --> 01:10:14,166
THAT WAS THE WORST
GAME I EVER HAD.
1839
01:10:14,210 --> 01:10:16,081
YEAH, I THINK
I WAS, LIKE,
1840
01:10:16,124 --> 01:10:17,735
2 FOR 8 FROM
THE FREE-THROW LINE.
1841
01:10:17,778 --> 01:10:19,693
YOUR FAMILY HAD
THESE BIG SIGNS UP
1842
01:10:19,737 --> 01:10:21,521
WITH YOUR NAME
ON THEM...
1843
01:10:21,565 --> 01:10:23,567
AND THEY STAYED UP
THE ENTIRE GAME,
1844
01:10:23,610 --> 01:10:25,351
EVEN WHEN YOU
WERE ON THE BENCH.
1845
01:10:25,395 --> 01:10:30,574
THEY BROUGHT THOSE
SIGNS TO EVERY GAME.
1846
01:10:31,096 --> 01:10:34,926
THEY'VE ALWAYS
HAD YOUR BACK.
1847
01:10:36,319 --> 01:10:37,624
WAIT A MINUTE.
1848
01:10:37,668 --> 01:10:38,930
WAIT A MINUTE.
1849
01:10:38,973 --> 01:10:41,149
SO YOU USED TO
WATCH ME PLAY?
1850
01:10:41,193 --> 01:10:43,021
DON'T CHANGE
THE SUBJECT.
1851
01:10:43,064 --> 01:10:44,805
HA HA HA.
1852
01:10:44,849 --> 01:10:46,677
BUT...YES.
1853
01:10:46,720 --> 01:10:48,113
JUST BECAUSE
WE LOST TOUCH
1854
01:10:48,156 --> 01:10:50,768
DOESN'T MEAN I DIDN'T
CHECK UP ON YOU.
1855
01:10:50,811 --> 01:10:54,598
I GUESS I GOT SOME
APOLOGIZING TO DO.
1856
01:10:54,641 --> 01:10:57,122
YEP.
1857
01:10:58,950 --> 01:11:00,604
YOU KNOW, BECKY...
1858
01:11:00,647 --> 01:11:03,433
I ALWAYS, ALWAYS
THOUGHT YOU WERE
1859
01:11:03,476 --> 01:11:06,305
REALLY SPECIAL
TO ME, AND, UM...
1860
01:11:06,349 --> 01:11:08,655
IT WAS SOMETHING
I ALWAYS WANTED TO DO,
1861
01:11:08,699 --> 01:11:12,616
BUT I NEVER
GOT A CHANCE TO--
1862
01:11:15,271 --> 01:11:17,969
I WANTED TO
DO THAT EARLIER.
1863
01:11:18,012 --> 01:11:20,058
[BOTH LAUGHING]
1864
01:11:20,101 --> 01:11:21,581
WHOO! YES.
1865
01:11:21,625 --> 01:11:22,626
COME ON.
1866
01:11:22,669 --> 01:11:25,063
SUMMER.
IT'S REALLY SUMMER.
1867
01:11:27,326 --> 01:11:30,982
YEAH.
THANK YOU, MAN.
1868
01:11:39,120 --> 01:11:45,605
MA, THOSE POTATOES
YOU MADE EARLIER WAS BANGING.
1869
01:11:54,614 --> 01:11:56,834
LOOK, MA, THE STUFF
I SAID EARLIER--
1870
01:11:56,877 --> 01:12:00,185
I LOVE YOU,
TOO, TODD.
1871
01:12:03,580 --> 01:12:04,624
COME HERE.
1872
01:12:04,668 --> 01:12:07,671
I'M SORRY, MOM.
I'M SORRY.
1873
01:12:07,714 --> 01:12:10,674
MMM...
1874
01:12:14,547 --> 01:12:16,288
JEEVES, WHAT
ARE YOU DOING?
1875
01:12:16,332 --> 01:12:19,422
WELL, I'M GIVING
TO-GO CONTAINERS
1876
01:12:19,465 --> 01:12:21,032
TO YOUR GUESTS, SIR.
1877
01:12:21,075 --> 01:12:22,555
MAN, PUT THOSE AWAY.
1878
01:12:22,599 --> 01:12:25,297
PEOPLE ONLY USE THOSE
TO BRING FOOD HOME
1879
01:12:25,341 --> 01:12:27,430
AFTERA COOKOUT.
1880
01:12:27,473 --> 01:12:30,346
OH. VERY GOOD, SIR.
1881
01:12:30,824 --> 01:12:34,698
LET'S GO.
LET'S GO.
1882
01:12:36,482 --> 01:12:38,963
I PUT HIS ASS IN CHECK
RIGHT QUICK,
1883
01:12:39,006 --> 01:12:40,530
JUST LIKE I DONE YOU.
1884
01:12:40,573 --> 01:12:44,664
PLUS THAT STUPID GATE ARM
WON'T OPEN.
1885
01:12:51,105 --> 01:12:53,281
OH!
1886
01:12:53,760 --> 01:12:57,242
REMEMBER, I ALWAYS
LOVED YOU, BABY.
1887
01:12:57,285 --> 01:12:59,766
[BEEP]
1888
01:12:59,810 --> 01:13:03,683
TIME TO BREAK THE GLASS.
1889
01:13:23,137 --> 01:13:26,489
YOU KNOW, I'M...
I'M TRYING TO FIND
1890
01:13:26,532 --> 01:13:28,055
MY HUSBAND HOLSTEAD.
1891
01:13:28,099 --> 01:13:30,449
HAVE YOU SEEN
MY HUSBAND HOLSTEAD?
1892
01:13:30,493 --> 01:13:33,017
MY HUSBAND HOLSTEAD?
EXCUSE ME!
1893
01:13:33,060 --> 01:13:34,714
[CONVERSATION STOPS]
1894
01:13:34,758 --> 01:13:37,630
[SOFTLY]
HAS ANYBODY SEEN HOLSTEAD?
1895
01:13:37,674 --> 01:13:38,849
MY HUSBAND.
1896
01:13:38,892 --> 01:13:40,372
[DOOR OPENS]
1897
01:13:40,416 --> 01:13:41,982
HOLSTEAD!
1898
01:13:43,201 --> 01:13:46,378
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
1899
01:13:46,422 --> 01:13:47,858
WHAT IT LOOK LIKE?
1900
01:13:47,901 --> 01:13:51,209
I GAVE ME
AND THAT BITCH
1901
01:13:51,252 --> 01:13:52,645
SOME FLAVOR.
1902
01:13:52,689 --> 01:13:55,474
WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT
USING THAT KIND OF LANGUAGE
1903
01:13:55,518 --> 01:13:57,998
IN FRONT OF--AAH!
LANGUAGE IN FRONT OF HER?
1904
01:13:58,042 --> 01:14:00,653
HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN
HOW SENSITIVE SHE IS?
1905
01:14:00,697 --> 01:14:01,698
LOOK HERE, WOMAN.
1906
01:14:01,741 --> 01:14:03,613
THINGS ARE GONNA
CHANGE AROUND HERE.
1907
01:14:03,656 --> 01:14:06,093
I'M TIRED OF YOU
PUTTING YOUR FOOT
1908
01:14:06,137 --> 01:14:07,094
ON THE BACK
1909
01:14:07,138 --> 01:14:09,270
OF A BROTHER'S NECK
ALL THE TIME.
1910
01:14:09,314 --> 01:14:10,663
THERE IT IS.
1911
01:14:10,707 --> 01:14:11,925
AMEN, BROTHER.
1912
01:14:11,969 --> 01:14:13,797
DON'T LET HER PUT WHITE BALLS
IN MOTHER EARTH.
1913
01:14:13,840 --> 01:14:14,972
DAMN STRAIGHT.
1914
01:14:15,015 --> 01:14:18,802
I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU
LIKE THIS BEFORE.
1915
01:14:18,845 --> 01:14:24,242
I MEAN, YOU'RE SO PROUD
AND...SEXY.
1916
01:14:24,285 --> 01:14:28,812
LET'S...GO HOME. NOW.
1917
01:14:28,855 --> 01:14:31,945
WOMAN, WHAT DID I
JUST TELL YOU?
1918
01:14:31,989 --> 01:14:35,427
WE GO HOME
WHEN I SAY SO.
1919
01:14:35,471 --> 01:14:39,170
[MURMURING]
1920
01:14:41,302 --> 01:14:43,000
ALL RIGHT.
1921
01:14:43,043 --> 01:14:45,132
COME ON.
LET'S GO.
1922
01:14:45,176 --> 01:14:47,874
I KNOW THAT'S RIGHT,
MRS. CROWLEY.
1923
01:14:47,918 --> 01:14:49,528
YOU BETTER GET THAT.
1924
01:14:49,572 --> 01:14:51,182
OK, EVERYBODY,
LET'S SAY GRACE.
1925
01:14:51,225 --> 01:14:54,272
TODD, YOU'RE OUR HOST.
LEAD US IN PRAYER.
1926
01:14:54,315 --> 01:14:58,102
DEAR LORD, THANK YOU
FOR THIS GATHERING--
1927
01:14:58,145 --> 01:14:59,843
SIR!
1928
01:15:01,366 --> 01:15:05,501
A MR. BIG PIMPING
BLING-BLING
1929
01:15:05,544 --> 01:15:08,547
AND MR. O.G.
BIG WHEEZER.
1930
01:15:08,591 --> 01:15:10,070
WHAT'S THAT SMELL?
1931
01:15:10,114 --> 01:15:11,332
IT'S THE SNEAKERS,
1932
01:15:11,376 --> 01:15:13,770
THE FUNKY-ASS SNEAKERS
OVER THERE.
1933
01:15:13,813 --> 01:15:15,598
THAT DON'T SMELL
LIKE FEET.
1934
01:15:15,641 --> 01:15:17,295
IT SMELLS LIKE ASS.
1935
01:15:17,338 --> 01:15:18,514
YEAH.
1936
01:15:18,557 --> 01:15:20,341
Y'ALL ARE DOING
THE DAMN THING IN HERE, HUH?
1937
01:15:20,385 --> 01:15:22,300
CORN...
1938
01:15:22,343 --> 01:15:23,431
HAM...
1939
01:15:23,475 --> 01:15:24,694
SOME CHICKEN...
1940
01:15:24,737 --> 01:15:25,912
MAC AND CHEESE.
1941
01:15:25,956 --> 01:15:28,567
LOOKS LIKE Y'ALL DON'T NEED
NO MORE OF THAT.
1942
01:15:28,611 --> 01:15:30,047
BRITTANY,
WHAT'S THIS TRASH
1943
01:15:30,090 --> 01:15:32,963
YOU DONE BROUGHT UP
IN THIS HOUSE?
1944
01:15:33,006 --> 01:15:34,312
I'M SORRY.
HE HAS A GUN.
1945
01:15:34,355 --> 01:15:35,618
BUT, LADY EM,
HERE'S THE HAM.
1946
01:15:35,661 --> 01:15:38,142
IT HAS BONE IN IT
AND EVERYTHING.
1947
01:15:38,185 --> 01:15:39,491
WHY IS IT THAT EVERY TIME
1948
01:15:39,535 --> 01:15:41,885
BLACK FOLKS GET TOGETHER
TO HAVE A GOOD TIME,
1949
01:15:41,928 --> 01:15:44,757
JOKERS LIKE YOU ALWAYS SEEM
TO MESS IT UP?
1950
01:15:44,801 --> 01:15:46,193
YOUR KIND
IS THE REASON
1951
01:15:46,237 --> 01:15:48,805
GOOD FOLK LIKE TODD
LEAVE THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
1952
01:15:48,848 --> 01:15:50,458
YOUNG MAN,
YOU'RE NOT WELCOME HERE.
1953
01:15:50,502 --> 01:15:51,895
Bling: SHUT
THE HELL UP, LADY.
1954
01:15:51,938 --> 01:15:53,331
TAKE CARE OF THEM
KIDS BACK THERE.
1955
01:15:53,374 --> 01:15:55,376
THAT'S WHAT YOU
NEED TO BE DOING.
1956
01:15:55,420 --> 01:15:56,726
LOOK, MAN, WHO ARE YOU?
1957
01:15:56,769 --> 01:15:57,770
AND WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING
IN MY HOUSE, MAN?
1958
01:15:57,814 --> 01:15:59,206
DON'T ACT LIKE
YOU DON'T KNOW ME.
1959
01:15:59,250 --> 01:16:00,947
I TAUGHT YOU
EVERYTHING YOU KNOW.
1960
01:16:00,991 --> 01:16:03,080
NOW GET YOUR ASS
UP AGAINST THE WALL
1961
01:16:03,123 --> 01:16:05,169
AND SIGN
THEM SNEAKERS.
1962
01:16:21,098 --> 01:16:22,926
HEY, MAN.
1963
01:16:22,969 --> 01:16:24,275
WHAT?
1964
01:16:24,318 --> 01:16:27,495
LOOK OVER THERE.
1965
01:16:30,237 --> 01:16:33,676
WHAT'S SHE TRYING...
WHAT'S SHE SAYING?
1966
01:16:37,593 --> 01:16:42,641
ALL RIGHT, LUSCIOUS.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
1967
01:16:44,817 --> 01:16:47,428
TODD, ARE YOU IN
SOME KIND OF TROUBLE?
1968
01:16:47,472 --> 01:16:50,344
POP, I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHO THESE DUDES ARE.
1969
01:16:50,388 --> 01:16:51,824
DOES THIS SORT OF THING
OCCUR FREQUENTLY?
1970
01:16:51,868 --> 01:16:53,739
OH, YEAH. I'VE BEEN
TO MANY COOKOUTS,
1971
01:16:53,783 --> 01:16:54,871
AND LET ME TELL YOU,
1972
01:16:54,914 --> 01:16:56,699
THIS KIND OF THING
HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.
1973
01:16:56,742 --> 01:16:58,265
IT'S ALL PART
OF THE FESTIVITIES.
1974
01:16:58,309 --> 01:16:59,571
YOU MIGHT WANT
TO HIDE THE PEARLS.
1975
01:16:59,615 --> 01:17:01,442
I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW
THAT TODD AND HIS FAMILY
1976
01:17:01,486 --> 01:17:03,009
ARE ALL LAW-ABIDING
CITIZENS,
1977
01:17:03,053 --> 01:17:04,837
AND I HOPE THIS DOESN'T
AFFECT YOUR DECISION
1978
01:17:04,881 --> 01:17:06,273
ON GIVING TODD
THE CAMPAIGN.
1979
01:17:06,317 --> 01:17:09,407
YOU MIGHT WANT TO PUT
YOUR HANDS BACK.
1980
01:17:09,450 --> 01:17:11,583
HEY, GIVE ME
THE BAT, OLD MAN.
1981
01:17:11,627 --> 01:17:13,280
ACT SCARED.
IT'S KIND OF FUN.
1982
01:17:13,324 --> 01:17:15,152
Grandpa: GET YOUR HANDS
OFF MY WOOD!
1983
01:17:15,195 --> 01:17:17,197
THIS GUY, HE SORT OF
REMINDS ME OF SOMEONE.
1984
01:17:17,241 --> 01:17:19,286
IN FACT,
REMEMBER THAT GUY
1985
01:17:19,330 --> 01:17:20,940
WE USED TO GO
TO SCHOOL WITH,
1986
01:17:20,984 --> 01:17:22,463
THE ONE
THEY USED TO BUG?
1987
01:17:22,507 --> 01:17:25,292
PERCIVAL ASS...
SOMETHING.
1988
01:17:25,336 --> 01:17:28,121
GET YOUR HANDS
OFF MY WOOD, SUCKER!
1989
01:17:28,165 --> 01:17:29,253
YEAH.
1990
01:17:29,296 --> 01:17:31,647
PERCIVAL?
1991
01:17:32,648 --> 01:17:33,779
PERCIVAL ASSMACKEY?
1992
01:17:33,823 --> 01:17:36,739
All together:
PERCIVAL ASSMACKEY?
1993
01:17:36,782 --> 01:17:38,305
[LAUGHTER]
1994
01:17:38,349 --> 01:17:39,872
SHUT UP!
1995
01:17:39,916 --> 01:17:42,658
STOP LAUGHING AT ME!
1996
01:17:42,701 --> 01:17:44,790
SHUT THE HELL UP!
STOP LAUGHING AT ME!
1997
01:17:44,834 --> 01:17:46,792
YOU TWO, STOP LAUGHING!
1998
01:17:46,836 --> 01:17:48,011
STOP LAUGHING AT ME!
1999
01:17:48,054 --> 01:17:50,187
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
2000
01:17:50,230 --> 01:17:51,623
[LAUGHTER FADES]
2001
01:17:51,667 --> 01:17:54,713
SHUT UP!
AND IT'S PRONOUNCED...
2002
01:17:54,757 --> 01:17:55,583
"ASSMOKEE."
2003
01:17:55,627 --> 01:17:57,760
IT'S WEST AFRICAN!
2004
01:17:57,803 --> 01:17:59,718
[LAUGHTER]
2005
01:18:00,023 --> 01:18:02,112
Y'ALL THINK
THIS IS REAL FUNNY.
2006
01:18:02,155 --> 01:18:04,331
WHY ARE WE WASTING
TIME WITH THEM?
2007
01:18:04,375 --> 01:18:06,464
I SAY WE THROW
THESE BUMS OUT,
2008
01:18:06,507 --> 01:18:08,771
AND LET'S GET
TO EATING.
2009
01:18:08,814 --> 01:18:10,468
COME ON!
2010
01:18:10,511 --> 01:18:12,209
SIT YOUR ASSES DOWN!
2011
01:18:12,252 --> 01:18:13,863
UNLESS YOU WANT ME
TO BLOW A HOLE
2012
01:18:13,906 --> 01:18:16,343
IN THIS $30 MILLION
KNEE OF YOURS.
2013
01:18:16,387 --> 01:18:18,345
NO!
2014
01:18:18,389 --> 01:18:22,480
NO!
2015
01:18:22,523 --> 01:18:24,700
UH!
2016
01:18:24,743 --> 01:18:25,701
BRITTANY.
2017
01:18:25,744 --> 01:18:27,180
WHAT THE HELL
IS GOING ON IN HERE?
2018
01:18:27,224 --> 01:18:28,791
Jamal: YOU'RE OK.
JAMAL IS HERE.
2019
01:18:28,834 --> 01:18:30,618
Jeeves: HERE
YOU ARE, SIR.
2020
01:18:30,662 --> 01:18:31,532
THANK YOU.
2021
01:18:31,576 --> 01:18:32,708
Nettie:
BE CAREFUL, JAMAL.
2022
01:18:32,751 --> 01:18:34,144
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE DOING, SWEETIE.
2023
01:18:34,187 --> 01:18:36,189
MA, YES, I DO. I KNOW
EXACTLY WHAT I'M DOING.
2024
01:18:36,233 --> 01:18:38,452
LOOK, I'VE BEEN TRYING
TO TELL YOU, I'M PRE-MED.
2025
01:18:38,496 --> 01:18:41,673
I'M GOING TO MEDICAL
SCHOOL NEXT YEAR.
2026
01:18:41,717 --> 01:18:43,022
OOH, A DOCTOR.
2027
01:18:43,066 --> 01:18:44,632
DID SOMEBODY
SAY "DOCTOR"?
2028
01:18:44,676 --> 01:18:46,896
MAN, ENOUGH OF THIS!
I'M SICK OF Y'ALL!
2029
01:18:46,939 --> 01:18:48,332
SHUT THE HELL UP!
2030
01:18:48,375 --> 01:18:50,595
WHEEZE, GET ON DOWN HERE.
2031
01:18:50,638 --> 01:18:52,379
GET ALL THE CASH
AND THE JEWELRY.
2032
01:18:52,423 --> 01:18:56,035
GET THESE SNEAKERS SIGNED.
LET'S GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE.
2033
01:18:56,079 --> 01:18:58,298
[SCREAMS]
2034
01:18:59,517 --> 01:19:00,692
AH! FREEZE!
2035
01:19:00,736 --> 01:19:03,869
YOU DON'T WANT
NONE OF THIS, BOY.
2036
01:19:03,913 --> 01:19:05,741
[CRASH]
2037
01:19:05,784 --> 01:19:08,482
[SCREAMS]
2038
01:19:14,184 --> 01:19:16,316
THAT WAS SOME
GREAT POLICE WORK,
2039
01:19:16,360 --> 01:19:17,491
APPREHENDING
THESE TWO.
2040
01:19:17,535 --> 01:19:20,364
THANK YOU, OFFICER.
GLAD TO BE OF SERVICE.
2041
01:19:20,407 --> 01:19:21,844
YEAH.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
2042
01:19:21,887 --> 01:19:23,236
I LIKE
YOUR ATTITUDE.
2043
01:19:23,280 --> 01:19:24,803
YOU SEEM WAY
TOO QUALIFIED
2044
01:19:24,847 --> 01:19:26,283
TO BE A SECURITY
GUARD.
2045
01:19:26,326 --> 01:19:28,241
HAVE YOU EVER
CONSIDERED
2046
01:19:28,285 --> 01:19:31,679
A CAREER IN
LAW ENFORCEMENT?
2047
01:19:33,856 --> 01:19:35,118
ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY!
2048
01:19:35,161 --> 01:19:36,336
DEEJAY ENUFF!
HEAVY HITTERS!
2049
01:19:36,380 --> 01:19:38,643
WE'RE ABOUT TO TAKE IT
TO THE OLD SCHOOL!
2050
01:19:38,686 --> 01:19:42,603
LET'S GO!
HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY!
2051
01:19:42,647 --> 01:19:44,127
HERE WE GO!
2052
01:19:44,170 --> 01:19:46,259
MISS DEE,
WHY DON'T YOU HIT ME
2053
01:19:46,303 --> 01:19:48,174
WITH SOME
OF THOSE DIGITS?
2054
01:19:48,218 --> 01:19:49,915
I LIKE THE WAY
YOU ROCK, JEEVES.
2055
01:19:49,959 --> 01:19:53,832
I'M FEELING YOU. UH! UH!
COME ON. BACK IT UP.
2056
01:19:53,876 --> 01:19:56,052
YOUR FAMILY
IS A TRIP.
2057
01:19:56,095 --> 01:19:57,183
YES, THEY ARE.
2058
01:19:57,227 --> 01:19:59,751
Together: GO, TODD!
GO, TODD! GO, TODD!
2059
01:19:59,795 --> 01:20:07,193
GO, TODD! GO, TODD! GO, TODD!
GO, TODD! GO, TODD! GO, TODD!
2060
01:20:07,237 --> 01:20:10,022
CAN I TALK TO YOU
FOR A SECOND?
2061
01:20:10,066 --> 01:20:13,199
Man: OH. HO. UH-OH.
YOU'RE IN TROUBLE.
2062
01:20:13,243 --> 01:20:15,680
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
DANCING WITH THAT GIRL?
2063
01:20:15,723 --> 01:20:17,464
SHE'S NOT EVEN
CUTER THAN I AM.
2064
01:20:17,508 --> 01:20:19,858
WHO? BECKY?
SHE'S MY FRIEND.
2065
01:20:19,902 --> 01:20:21,468
YOU HURT YOURSELF
DANCING WITH THESE PEOPLE,
2066
01:20:21,512 --> 01:20:22,643
YOU'RE NOT GONNA GET PAID
2067
01:20:22,687 --> 01:20:24,210
FOR THE TIME THAT
YOU SPEND RECUPERATING.
2068
01:20:24,254 --> 01:20:27,083
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
"THESE PEOPLE"?
2069
01:20:27,126 --> 01:20:28,040
YEAH.
2070
01:20:28,084 --> 01:20:30,695
LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHING. I...
2071
01:20:32,175 --> 01:20:33,132
BRITTANY...
2072
01:20:33,176 --> 01:20:35,526
I WANT TO SEE
OTHER PEOPLE.
2073
01:20:35,569 --> 01:20:37,528
IS IT SOMETHING
THAT I SAID?
2074
01:20:37,571 --> 01:20:40,052
IT'S EVERYTHING YOU SAY.
IT'S EVERYTHING YOU DO.
2075
01:20:40,096 --> 01:20:42,272
I NEED SOMEBODY I GOT
MORE IN COMMON WITH,
2076
01:20:42,315 --> 01:20:43,664
LIKE, SOMEBODY
I CAN RELATE TO,
2077
01:20:43,708 --> 01:20:45,101
SOMEBODY THAT CAN
RELATE TO ME.
2078
01:20:45,144 --> 01:20:48,147
I CAN RELATE TO YOU.
I CAN RELATE TO YOU.
2079
01:20:48,191 --> 01:20:50,584
I CAN BE...
STREET, YOU KNOW.
2080
01:20:50,628 --> 01:20:53,674
I CAN BE LIKE,
"YO, YO, G. WHAT'S UP?"
2081
01:20:53,718 --> 01:20:59,506
YOU KNOW, I CAN RIDE
OR DIVE...THING.
2082
01:20:59,550 --> 01:21:00,638
YOU HAVE NO IDEA
2083
01:21:00,681 --> 01:21:02,118
WHAT I'M TALKING
ABOUT, DO YOU?
2084
01:21:02,161 --> 01:21:05,121
NO. PLEASE.
PLEASE, BABY.
2085
01:21:05,164 --> 01:21:07,732
I DON'T...
I DON'T WANT TO WORK,
2086
01:21:07,775 --> 01:21:09,603
AND I DON'T WANT
TO PAY BILLS.
2087
01:21:09,647 --> 01:21:13,477
I DON'T WANT TO...
I WANT THE DIAMONDS.
2088
01:21:13,520 --> 01:21:15,522
PLEASE, CAN I KEEP
THE MERCEDES
2089
01:21:15,566 --> 01:21:18,438
AND THE DIAMONDS?
PLEASE.
2090
01:21:19,396 --> 01:21:20,963
YOU CAN KEEP
THE DIAMONDS.
2091
01:21:21,006 --> 01:21:22,878
LEAVE THE CAR KEYS
IN THE HOUSE
2092
01:21:22,921 --> 01:21:24,705
AFTER YOU GET
YOUR STUFF,
2093
01:21:24,749 --> 01:21:26,751
AND YOU GET OUT.
2094
01:21:26,794 --> 01:21:28,796
THANKS.
2095
01:21:34,977 --> 01:21:38,763
WHERE'S THE DOCTOR AT?
2096
01:21:45,944 --> 01:21:49,295
♪ THIS IS WHAT I BELIEVE
2097
01:21:58,304 --> 01:22:00,916
♪ BEEN SO LONG
SINCE I MET YOU ♪
2098
01:22:00,959 --> 01:22:02,918
WHOO-HOO!
TODD, WE GOT IT!
2099
01:22:02,961 --> 01:22:06,834
♪ AND ALL THE CHANGES
WE'VE BEEN THROUGH ♪
2100
01:22:06,878 --> 01:22:08,053
WHOO!
2101
01:22:08,097 --> 01:22:11,013
♪ AND ALL THIS TIME,
I CAN'T FORGET YOU ♪
2102
01:22:11,056 --> 01:22:13,232
YEAH! WHEN DO WE START?
2103
01:22:13,276 --> 01:22:14,364
NOW.
2104
01:22:14,407 --> 01:22:18,585
♪ EVERYWHERE I TURN,
I THINK OF YOU ♪
2105
01:22:18,629 --> 01:22:23,199
♪ I...WANT
TO TRUST YOU MAYBE ♪
2106
01:22:23,242 --> 01:22:28,769
♪ AND YOU,
YOU'RE ALL I NEED ♪
2107
01:22:28,813 --> 01:22:31,033
♪ SOUL TO SOUL,
FIRE TO FIRE ♪
2108
01:22:31,076 --> 01:22:33,992
♪ NOTHING TO LIGHT
THIS MAN'S DESIRE ♪
2109
01:22:34,036 --> 01:22:38,866
♪ LOVE IS
A BEAUTIFUL THING ♪
2110
01:22:38,910 --> 01:22:41,434
♪ ONE TO ONE,
YOU AND ME ♪
2111
01:22:41,478 --> 01:22:43,610
♪ MAYBE IT'S THE BEST
FOR ME ♪
2112
01:22:43,654 --> 01:22:48,789
♪ 'CAUSE LOVE
IS A BEAUTIFUL THING ♪
2113
01:22:48,833 --> 01:22:50,617
♪ IT'S A BEAUTIFUL
2114
01:22:50,661 --> 01:22:52,271
♪ BEAUTIFUL
2115
01:22:52,315 --> 01:22:57,015
♪ LOVE IS
SUCH A SWEET EMOTION ♪
2116
01:22:57,059 --> 01:23:02,368
♪ I WANT TO SHARE IT
ALL WITH YOU ♪
2117
01:23:02,412 --> 01:23:04,892
♪ TONIGHT
2118
01:23:04,936 --> 01:23:07,112
♪ I WANT TO THANK YOU, BABY
2119
01:23:07,156 --> 01:23:09,549
♪ AND YOU MAKE
2120
01:23:09,593 --> 01:23:12,291
♪ MY LIFE COMPLETE
2121
01:23:12,335 --> 01:23:14,815
♪ SOUL TO SOUL,
FIRE TO FIRE ♪
2122
01:23:14,859 --> 01:23:17,557
♪ NOTHING TO LIGHT
THIS MAN'S DESIRE ♪
2123
01:23:17,601 --> 01:23:22,345
♪ LOVE IS
A BEAUTIFUL THING ♪
2124
01:23:22,388 --> 01:23:25,696
♪ ONE TO ONE,
YOU AND ME... ♪
2125
01:23:25,739 --> 01:23:28,394
[NEW SONG BEGINS]
2126
01:23:38,752 --> 01:23:41,233
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
LIONS GATE ENTERTAINMENT
2127
01:23:41,277 --> 01:23:46,282
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
--www.ncicap.org--
137212
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