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I'm sorry, sir, we're closed.

I'm sorry, sir, we're..

You like it?

It's extraordinary workmanship.

But the jewels look real.

Oh, they are.

Naturally, for a color such as this

I need a very elegant cat.

A nice big fat one.

Well, I'm a bit confused, sir.

Which do you wish, elegant or fat?

What I need..

...is the kind of cat that gets himself stolen.

I see.

Yeah.

'You're free.'

Go away!

Here, kitty, kitty kitty, kitty, kitty.

Here, kitty, kitty.

Here, kitty. Here, kitty.

Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.

Here, kitty. Here, kitty.

Here, kitty, kitty kitty, kitty, kitty.

Ah, we won't be needin' this, will we?

I wasn't doing nothin'.

Found a cat, that's all!

No crime there, is there?

Just found a, found a stray cat is all I did.

Well, there's nothing wrong there, is there?

That's for finding him.

Where do you take them?

I don't take 'em nowhere.

Make it five.

I take them to Corvy.

Who's Corvy?

Just Corvy.

He and his chum.

'They've got this whole house all stocked up with cats.'

'Loves cats.'

Hates to see 'em walk the streets, you might say.

You know, pays you for 'em if you bring 'em to the house.

'Two bob.'

Five bob, if it's a special big one.

Loves...big cats, they do.

One more question.

Where do I find this house with Corvy and his chum?

'Agent Solo just arrived.'

'He's on his way up.'

Sit down.

You recognize the subject, Mr. Solo?

'Uh, Benjamin Lancer.'

'Uh, PhD'd in emeritus, Harvard.'

Uh, National Science Award for work in genetic linkages

and, uh, X-ray induced mutations.

Very good, Mr. Solo.

He also shared the Nobel Prize in 1952

for his research into the aging process of cats.

He maintained that cats are remarkably

similar to human beings in that regard.

He retired three years ago.

'That's when this picture was taken.'

'Mm-hm. And I would say that was the same man, about..'

'...thirty years ago.'

This picture was taken last week, Mr. Solo.

A son?

There's no record of a son to Dr. Lancer.

Uh-huh. That doesn't change the picture any.

'And there's another fact you should know.'

If these two pictures represent father and son..

...then we must consider the fact

that the two sets of fingerprints which accompanied

the pictures are identical.

Well, fingerprints have been faked before, sir.

I'd like to see both men, make a positive identification.

'Get a, uh, retinal pattern for example.'

'I'd like to talk to Dr. Lancer.'

'You'll have to find him first, however.'

He's disappeared.

'THRUSH?'

Not yet.

So far as we know.

But I dare say that an organization

with THRUSH's capacity for evil

won't be out of the picture very long.

I suggest you waste no time in seeking out Dr. Lancer.

Are you going to give me any hint

or shall I start from scratch?

Oh, he does have a daughter. Lorelei.

She's a model for the House of De Sala in Paris.

Hmm. Well, thank you.

Oh, and Mr. Solo..

...when you contact Miss Lancer

please keep it mind that although you are

investigating a biological mystery

your relationship with Miss Lancer on behalf of UNCLE

is...research of another order.

Duty first.

Will I have time to stop in London

and see Kuryakin in the hospital?

Oh, Mr. Kuryakin left the hospital this morning.

By now he's back chasing cats in Soho.

Yes?

I am Madame De Sala.

How do you do, uh?

Enchante.

"Napoleon Solo."

What do you wish, monsieur?

I just told your charming young lady the exact truth.

I want to see Miss Lancer.

For what purpose?

Well, it may just not concern you.

Everything here concerns me.

Do you think because she is a model

you may just come in and just-just..

Scout's honor, uh...just-just

is the last thing in my mind.

Who are you and what do you wish?

When those two are answered I shall decide

if you are to see Lorelei or no.

Thank you. Good afternoon.

I have no trouble introducing myself

if it's too much of a burden for you.

Lorelei, this is a man who calls himself Napoleon Solo.

Whoever that might be.

He wishes to speak with you.

I would advise younot.

Thank you.

I wanna ask you about your father, Miss Lancer.

I'm sorry, Mr. Solo, I really don't wish to speak to you.

Miss Lancer, I must reach your father.

His life may depend on it.

You can reach me here.

You may leave this way.

I'm sorry, child.

I know that was an embarrassment.

Madame, why didn't you want me to talk to him?

I am worried about my father.

Uh, leave, leave us, please.

Uh, please.

Thank you.

Why is because he is the enemy.

- 'In what way?' - Because we are women.

'How can I explain to you a whole history'

'of the world which we did not create?'

They put it together. They did.

Why do you think I engage myself..

...in the making and selling of dresses?

Do you perhaps believe it is all of which I am capable?

'Do you think I wish nothing else in life?'

I want.

I want that which belongs to me, no less

than to a man, it is power.

'A power that is almost within my grasp.'

'No, it is not fantasy.'

It is not madness.

In a world controlled by men

I have found a way

to control the controllers.

But you will understand when you are told.

Where is my father, madame?

I cannot tell you even that.

Please don't press me.

But believe in me.

'And do not converse with that man again.'

I beg of you.

Your life may depend upon it.

This needs something more fluid.

Olga, the beads.

She will not talk to that man again.

You will see to it.

Do Do, are you going home tonight right after the showing?

Mm-hm, long enough to change my clothes.

Do you have a date?

Maurice.

I want you to stay with Lorelei this evening.

It's important.

I see.

What if she's going out?

She's not.

I want you to stay with her in her flat.

You live right next door, it shouldn't be too difficult

to think of some pretext or other.

Why?

I wanna make sure she doesn't

telephone a Mr. Solo.

If you think she's going to, you call me.

I can be there in ten minutes.

What if I can't stall her that long?

I've discovered that this has

great persuasive powers.

Ssh! Get out!

'Shh!'

Stop..

Get away!

Get away, dog!

Open channel D, please.

Napoleon.

Well, you don't sound at all like Mr. Waverly.

Now, really, Napoleon.

Mr. Waverly made me your contact woman.

Mm, he shows impeccable taste, Wanda.

It's a beautiful moon here, how's yours?

We don't have any.

It's only 5 o'clock.

'Ah, well, I'll have to share this one with you then.'

In the first place, it's different

than the one you have at home.

It's a girl moon.

'And her eyes are open very wide and her mouth is'

'open in the shape of an "O."'

'As though she's just been kissed.'

Mmm.

Lucky moon.

I presume that's Mr. Solo.

Ahem, actually, sir, ah..

Well, will you please tell him that

if he runs into Mr. Kuryakin

Mr. Kuryakin is to.. Well..

Well, Mr. Kuryakin is spending altogether

too much money on cats.

Our finance people are getting restless.

Now, the reason I called you, Wanda

I met an extraordinary woman this afternoon.

Don't you always?

Well, she's not exactly my type.

I'll need a dossier on her.

Her name is Madame De Sala.

Come, professor.

Stay here.

Norman.

Norman, I've brought Professor Gritsky with me.

Professor Gritsky will make all of his preparations tonight

and by morning you will have your first treatment.

There is a time to die.

Go, please, make everything ready.

Cold.

Too late, Raine. Too late.

Time is the enemy.

It wounds you with its daze.

We will wound time.

You and I and Gritsky.

I have no purpose to fight.

I remember..

...when they turned out Winston Churchill

I was hardly an old man then.

I thought how dare they do this.

'How dare they.'

And then my turn came

and I was far more angry because it was me.

'Well, I thought, let 'em get on without me.'

Mmm.

They did.

But what have they done?

Is this the kind of world you would've made?

I ran out of time.

I don't want it now, Raine.

I lie awake wondering how to move

puny people to great purposes.

When I was ten years old

I was in love with you.

I would say to myself

"One day I will marry him."

'How I raced.'

'How I raced to grow up fast.'

Do you remember?

When I was 16, and I would sit by your side

with my head on your lap?

I love you still, my Norman.

'Yes, you have run out of time.'

But that is all.

And we can give that back to you.

Do you remember the power you once had?

'It was in you.'

When I was a very little girl

and I would learn that you were going to go into a room

I would race to get to that room before you.

'The room itself would change.'

'If there were people in it'

'they would stop..'

'...and wait..'

'...and listen to what you would say to them.'

How I longed then to take your hand..

...and walk with you through the halls of power.

'To feel that terrible strength going from you into me.'

And it shall be.

Take my hand, Norman.

And let me lead you back to greatness.

My mind's just not on cards tonight.

Well, I didn't think it was when I blitzed you three times.

What are you thinking of?

Do Do, would you mind?

I mean I'm awfully tired, I would like--

I bet you wanna call Mr. Solo.

I told you, he's not a boyfriend.

He's a..

...car salesman.

Alright, I'll go as soon as you fix me a drink.

Uh, little whiskey and soda.

Whiskey and soda.

Hello, Maurice.

Do Do.

I understand.

- Do Do? - 'In here.'

Do Do, please. Olga..

Oh, I'm so glad you're here.

I don't know what's come over her.

All of a sudden she got that knife and she came--

Poor child, it has been

a traumatic experience for you, hasn't it?

You shouldn't have frightened her so.

She was being very difficult.

Olga, I was so frightened

and I just don't understand what's happening.

There's so many things you don't understand, my dear.

See who that is.

I'll explain it all to you in a moment.

- Hello. - Is Miss Lancer there?

This is Napoleon Solo.

Uh, just a moment, please.

It's Solo.

Solo? I have to talk--

Tell him to come over.

Ow, what?

Uh, Mr. Solo?

Lorelei had to, uh, step out a few moments.

'But I know she did wanna speak to you.'

Good. Do you have the address?

Yes.

'I'm so glad.'

Close the door.

Miss Lancer?

Hello.

Are you Mr. Solo?

Uh, yes. I am, um..

I'm Do Do.

I live over there.

'I just spoke to you on the phone, remember?'

Oh, uh, Miss Lancer hasn't returned yet then?

Oh, no, no. She, uh..

Well, I guess she'll be back soon.

She left the coffee pot on.

Would you like a little drinky while you wait?

No, thank you, I'll just, uh..

...have a little coffee.

Oh, do you like cats, Mr. Solo?

Well, a friend of mine has recently become a cat fancier.

I guess a little bit may have rubbed off on me.

Uh, sugar, sugar, sugar. Where is it?

That's alright, I'll just take, uh, some cream.

Here.

Do you mind if I make myself a little drink?

No, be my guest.

Oh, not that I drink much, Mr. Solo.

I mean, uh..

You know, I wouldn't want you to get the impression

that I was the kind of girl who drinks a lot.

Perish the thought.

I don't have any vices.

And believe me, that's very hard.

It is?

Well, you know, for a..

...girl who looks like me.

Well, I'm, uh..

...sure your mother raised you quite properly.

Oh, she did.

You know, one thing she said to me, "Helga.."

'Oh, Helga's my real name. We come from Hamburg.'

'I used to be in the theatre there.'

'I mean, right now, I'm working as a model'

'but I'm really an actress.'

'As a matter of fact, I'm going to be in a revue.'

'In London!'

So if you're ever over there..

Anyway, my mother always told me--

You make a nice cup of coffee, Do Do, now where's Miss Lancer?

Get away!

Aah!

My name is Bentley, ma'am

from Fort Worth, uh, that's in Texas.

I couldn't help but hear the commotion.

Was this fella botherin' you?

Okay, buddy. On your feet.

Now, come on.

- Come on. - Oh, boy.

Wait a minute, wait a minute..

- Where's the girl? - Hey!

You sound like an American. I...I bet you are.

I ought to call the gendarmes.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

Takin' advantage of a poor defenseless woman.

You know it's fellers like you

that gives us tourists a bad name!

Alright!

Now, look, buddy, I don't know what this is all about

but it sure don't look right to me.

Ooh, that little lady sure did chew

a big hunk outta your ear, huh?

I bet that smarts.

Well, I'll be..

You should be.

There's a police station a couple of doors from here.

Why don't you run down there and get a couple of

gendarmes and bring 'em back.

Huh?

Oh! Oh, yeah.

Uh, you bet.

"If you have to reach me, you can do so in care of

"Phillip Bainbridge

at the Byram Club in London."

Uh, good afternoon, sir.

Be out of me way, will you, man?

I'm must give him his medicine!

Uh, we do not allow female persons on the premises.

I am not a female person.

I am a registered nurse.

Nevertheless, you are not a male nurse.

'Do you mean to say, that in a matter of life and death'

'you would not allow me in?'

Underallcircumstances

there has never been a woman in the Byram Club.

Has none of you a mother?

Those members who have arrange to meet

their mothers on the outside.

To whom should the medicine be given?

I would not trust you with an aspirin!

I'd, uh, offer you my shoulder to cry on

but we haven't been formally introduced.

But if you like, I'll take your medicine inside for you.

It is for Sir Norman Swickert.

And he understands the manner of the medication.

And as for myself

I wouldn't care to be introduced to a gentleman

who meets his mother on the outside.

I'm Napoleon Solo, I have an appointment

with, uh, Phillip Bainbridge.

Lancer.

Is it really you?

Try me.

What is the Bridge of Lions?

A private chess society.

What was your most recent move?

Queen to Black Queen's Bishop Four.

Describe to me the events

of November the third, 1919.

November third is my birthday.

In 1919, I was 37 years old.

'You and I were part of the Mackinson polar expedition'

of that year.

On November third, we were on the icepack north of Greenland

'debating if we should shoot a polar bear we had tracked.'

'Nearly 50 years ago.'

I couldn't believe the process worked.

I had to come and see for myself.

But why, why this Bainbridge?

Why the alias?

You wouldn't want our secret to leak out, would you?

If only I did this at the right time.

Five more years I needed and they turned me out.

Norman..

...now we can give you 25 years.

Good heavens, a woman.

He's dead.

'Quickly!'

'Quickly!'

- What happened? - There was a slight mistake.

You better go up there.

I'll get you. Leave me alone!

- No! - Ah, ah.

- Stop it, now! - Ah.

Olga, shoot him.

'Stop it!'

Olga, for heavens sake, shoot him!

You're standing in the middle of the driveway.

It's very dangerous, people get hurt that way.

This is private property, sir. And you're trespassing.

Unless, of course, I'm a guest.

You don't look like a guest to me, sir.

You're an American, aren't you?

Yes, sir, I am.

Good day, sir.

You a member of the Bridge of Lions?

Sir?

Although, you feel free to study those boards

they are the property of the Bridge of Lions.

Their examination is privileged

to the membership of that society.

Well, I'm sorry, sir, if I offended you

by looking at the games.

If this is about today's murder..

Immediately, I left the Byram Club.

I went to New Scotland Yard and made a full statement.

If you like I shall arrange

to furnish you with a copy.

I already have.

So it was Dr. Lancer killed at the Byram Club today?

"And I do hereby assert of my own freewill

"and under sacred oath that I did this day witness

the death by murder of Phillip Bainbridge."

You haven't answered my question, sir.

Did you see Bainbridge?

If he'd been Lancer, he'd have to be 83 years old.

That's not the question, sir.

The question is, who was Phillip Bainbridge

and was he Benjamin Lancer?

And will you vouch that he was not?

This is Benjamin Lancer's board.

We all have our own boards so that we can play

by mail when we are not together.

Did you know that over 30 million deaths

were caused by World War I?

Unnecessary.

Accidents of history brought about

by a break down of communications.

Not between nations but between men.

The men who create history

who speak for the nations

and say yes and no to fate.

It was then that I decided to build a bridge between

the great men and the great minds of the world.

A Bridge of Lions.

So that the borders of the nations

could not come between these men

when they desire to communicate with each other.

So, Norman..

...who was killed at the Byram Club today?

'Queen to Black Queen Bishops Four.'

Sir?

Phillip Bainbridge.

Where is Benjamin Lancer then?

Dead.

Just as Phillip Bainbridge is dead.

Napoleon.

Come in, Napoleon.

Napoleon Solo on channel.

And how shines the moon on England's fair land?

Oh, sorry to disenchant you, my dear. It shines not at all.

Napoleon, I'm counting the days till our moon shines.

Oh, by the way

I got that dossier you wanted.

Report, my child, with regard to a certain Madame De Sala.

That extraordinary woman?

'Ah, pure hostility caused by sheer envy.'

Madame was born in 1931.

Her mother died the same year.

Her father died nine years later.

He was a general and a member of the Bridge of Lions.

A Sir Norman Swickert took the child

into his house to bring her up.

That's a good beginning for a Victorian novel.

Hmm, she owns a cosmetics company

and two establishments of haute couture.

One for the rich-rich, the other for the poor-rich.

All original capital supplied by Sir Norman

who remains a major partner.

Leaving out the Bridge of Lions, is there any connection

between either a Swickert or De Sala and Lancer?

Umm, there's a biochemist named Alexander Gritsky.

Financed by De Sala's cosmetics company.

Hormone research.

Gritsky used to be a pupil of Lancer.

Ah.

Napoleon?

'Napoleon?'

'Napoleon?'

Napoleon?

Mr. Waverly, Mr. Waverly

I can't recover contact with Mr. Solo

and his channel's still open.

Camel station.

Waverly speaking.

Mr. Solo, we are trying to contact you.

Can you respond?

'Mr. Solo, can you respond?'

Please, don't shout.

Mr. Solo's going to have a very nasty headache as it is

if he recovers consciousness.

You might send him a couple of aspirins if you care.

About, um, three and a half miles

just north of lesser Littlehampton.

Who is this?

Jordin is the name.

Hello? Hello?

Jordin?

Jordin?

Hand me the THRUSH year volume please.

'Jordin.'

'Ah, yes.'

'Just as I thought.'

'Hello, kitty.'

'What did they do to you?'

How did you become a little kitten?

You were a big cat the last time I saw you.

- Illya? - Napoleon?

Very funny.

Indeed.

Is that who you're looking for?

His name is Corvy.

He collected cats.

I'm looking for a biochemist named Alexander Gritsky.

Hmm.

And he's the man that..

...found Corvy collected the cats.

Did you know that the nervous system of a cat

is the closest thing to the nervous system of a human?

Do you know that?

Hatpin.

Hatpin.

Well...hello, kitten.

If Corvy collected cats and only cats

where do the kittens come from?

Hmm?

Hatpin.

Hatpin.

I think this is the hat the hatpin was in

before it was in Mr. Corvy.

You know who put up the money for the House of De Sala?

Swickert. Sir Norman Swickert.

How would you like to go for a little ride in the country?

'Sir Swickert has a lovely place in the country.'

If I can't get an explanation of what you're talking about

I'll settle for the ride.

There is no change.

There is no change!

What do you think, we are science fiction?

We are like those hormone creams you advertise in the magazine

smear on, smear off and underneath is a new face?

I thought it would be finished.

It is begun.

Your whole metabolism of the body

is in a new order.

'We don't do this, the body does it by itself.'

'Cell by cell.'

You should be saying, "Romeo, Romeo

where fore art thou, Romeo?"

- Well, I-- - I'm not what you think I am.

Well, I am enough of a lady, so that I

wouldn't know how to think what I think you are.

Yes, I'd like to introduce you to my, uh, chaperone.

Mr. Kuryakin, this is Miss Sweet.

Well, if you're going to be lookin' at me in my night gown.

Well, you should be red-faced.

I think all that's necessary is that we speak to the girl

and orient her as to who we are and what we are

and the principles that we stand for

and I think it..

Good morning.

Your friend having a little trouble?

Uh, little enough.

He's dead.

That's very unusual.

Seventy three percent of all accidents happen in the home.

Very rarely do you find somebody who dies in a wine vat.

I think his heart gave out.

'Sheer terror...killed him.'

Jordin is the name.

J-O-R-D-I-N, insurance game.

Uh, in a way.

Most insurance men sell you something to settle the damages

after something happens.

My specialty is prevention.

Then who carries your papers?

'Oh, it goes this way and that.'

Sometimes I carry my own paper and, uh

sometimes I get somebody to underwrite me.

THRUSH for example?

Uh, the world is full of birds.

I don't suppose you would mind answering a couple of questions

would you, Mr. Solo?

Actually, Mr. Jordin, I answers questions much better

when I'm not standing at the bottom of a wine vat.

Next time you'll play dead

and I'll make up the reasons why.

Quiet, please.

And, uh, now

if you don't mind, uh

take off your jacket, please.

Just, uh, drop it anywhere.

And the gun.

I've already been relieved of that.

The holster then.

And, uh, one shoe.

'Either one.'

Thank you.

Uh, pull the ladder up, Jack.

I have to remember this one shoe bit. It's very good.

Hmm. Throws you just enough off balance to slow you down a bit.

- Mm-hmm. - Gives me a little edge.

'Sit down, please.'

Uh, sit on your hands.

Palms up, if you don't mind.

Makes it harder to get up again, doesn't it?

That's my impression.

I, uh, don't mean to complain

you've been very nice and all that

but it is a little cold in here.

Thank you.

'Now, we can get down to cases'

review the data, bring everything up to date

and go on from there.

'Now, we, uh..'

We have a biochemist named, uh...Lancer

who disappears for a while

and the next time we see him he calls himself Bainbridge.

'And appears to be 30 years younger.'

Is appearance reality?

Is Bainbridge really Lancer?

Now, we look and another biochemist disappears.

A former student

an associate of Lancer's called

'Professor Alexander Gritsky.'

What is U.N.C.L.E. Agent Napoleon Solo's

interest in all this?

Now, U.N.C.L.E. sends another agent Illya Kuryakin

to the London Soho.

Kuryakin follows cats.

'Questions.'

- Why does Kuryakin-- - Lazarus.

I beg your pardon.

Lazarus, the...chap who rose from the dead.

Mr. Jordin..

Look out, Napoleon!

I thought you had a little more style

than to try an old trick like that.

I don't know what you mean.

Well, money clip, I'm surprised at you.

It is also a bomb.

- Really? - Really.

Really?

Really.

Hello, Sir Charles.

How are you?

Good to see you..

How are you?

Excuse me for one moment.

Gentlemen.

I must say, Sir Norman, you look a good deal younger

than the last time we met.

So it appears.

We shall have to have your secret, sir.

What secret?

Whether or not you describe it as a miracle

a genuine process of rejuvenation does exist

doesn't it?

- Does it? - Yes.

Developed by Dr. Lancer and Professor Alexander Gritsky.

Go on.

And since Dr. Lancer is dead

the power of the process remains with Professor Gritsky.

A fair deduction.

Would you tell us where Professor Gritsky is?

'So we can protect him?'

From whom?

There are probably THRUSH agents

in the Byram Club right now.

'Ready to snatch your secret.'

'And put it to their own use.'

Mr. Solo, you're laboring under a terrible misapprehension.

The only secret in my possession

is my marriage to Madam De Sala.

And that'll only be a secret until tomorrow

when it is announced in all the papers.

Sir Norman, a truly effective process

of rejuvenation is no joking matter.

I quite agree.

But until one has been discovered

I can only recommend the one I have tried.

Marriage to the right woman.

What you see in me is only a-a reflection

of what my wife sees.

And now, if you'll excuse me

I have a great number of people

waiting for me outside.

Good day, gentlemen.

I must say Sir Norman is everything

the Swickert legend says he is.

Alright, where do we go from here?

Well, what if we were THRUSH?

What do we want?

We want Sir Norman, or do we want..

Want what?

I think our friends from THRUSH

have been eavesdropping.

'Well, it won't be the first time.'

Let's see what kind of an earache we can give them.

Hh-hmm. Too late, my friends. Too late.

Shall we go?

Alright, spread out.

Bring the stretcher.

- Time to go. - In one moment.

Have you been introduced?

'Hmm.'

Here.

Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin responding.

What further developments, Mr. Solo?

Uh, it's very quiet here, sir.

Mrs. Swickert has made two calls.

'The second one was answered by the police in her office.'

'So she knows about the murder and the kidnapping.'

Anything on your end?

We picked up the ambulance

they used to carry Gritsky.

They left it at a small private airport.

Then continued on with Gritsky by plane.

That's the last we know of them, till now.

'So stay with it, Mr. Solo.'

'You and Mr. Kuryakin.'

'They'll most certainly try to contact Mrs. Swickert.'

Yes, we shall be there, sir.

Oh, let's hope so, Mr. Solo.

'Hello?'

'I'd like to speak to the lady of the house.'

Yes, I'm listening.

Jordin is the name. J-O-R-D-I-N.

'Insurance with a difference.'

'Uh, we prevent sickness or, um'

'accident before it happens.'

Yes.

We recently acquired a client who may need some prevention

by the name of Alexander Gritsky.

I am listening very carefully.

Yes. Well, in view of the present condition

of your husband, we thought we might kill two birds

with one stone, and, uh..

Well, I'd like to get together with you

and discuss the whole package.

Why don't you get into your car

'and take a little drive'

'by way of Marsh Ealing.'

'Just go straight on through the village'

'and, uh, see what happens after that.'

Good morning, Miss Sweet.

- What do you want with him? - Now, just be quiet.

Hey, you are to take your hands off of him.

I'm just trying to awaken him.

Well, you'll have no luck with it, I can promise you that.

The man is asleep with a heavy sedation.

So you can spare yourself the effort

and keep your hands off of him.

- Napoleon Solo. - 'Napoleon?'

'Lady Swickert's car is approaching.'

'Alright, I'll talk to you later, Illya.'

Excuse me.

Uh, you've crumpled my fender.

Will you please get your car out of our way?

You've crumpled my fender.

Will you please move that car?

Yes, ma'am.

- Lady Swickert, I presume. - Yes, it is.

And I'm willing to concede

absolutely that it is our fault.

Now, will you please let us get on?

The insurance, um

do you have a pencil?

If you don't mind

I'll just write this, formalities, you know.

Wo-would you mind awfully, if I, uh..

Something to lean on or I'll damage the paint.

Fleeton, will you please hurry?

Yes, ma'am.

- 'Bag?' - Yes.

Here's insurance and your pen.

Good morning.

- Was that really necessary? - Oh, he isn't dead.

I just put him to sleep with a tranquilizing charge.

Mind you, I'll have to have him killed

if I can't come to an agreement with you.

- As you did with Olga. - Ah, self-defense there.

I think we should talk very directly.

Yes.

'Last night before we took Professor Gritsky'

you had power, now you don't.

If you want us to, we'll give it back to you.

- Who is your "we?" - Uh, THRUSH.

And what do you require of me?

Oh, simply that from time to time

as you guide your husband through the treacherous

'paths of political decision'

'you allow yourself to be guided by us.'

I see.

Why is there no sound of her?

She's thinking.

Very well. I shall do it for my husband.

Lucky man.

I'm glad he is asleep and cannot hear that.

'What if he had heard it?'

'He would've had to believe it.'

And where would he find the wanting to live in that case?

Man's fate, my dear, you must take the bitter with the sweet.

You're not as wise as ya think.

You're not wise at all.

'You're nothing but a young man without any feeling.'

Mr. Solo...do not force him to know.

It would be an unkindness such as you could never imagine.

'Oh, last night he was so content'

'looking forward to this evening.'

Oh, what's happening this evening?

Oh, there's to be a meeting with a great many

of the most important political men.

Uh, he was working on his speech.

Overseas relay.

Channel D, Napoleon Solo.

Yes, come in, Mr. Solo.

May I assume, sir, that you know

Sir Norman Swickert very well?

Since before you were born, Mr. Solo.

Hmm.

I think you should come to England tonight

and talk to him personally.

I have it on good authority that..

...I'm a very young man and not wise enough.

That there's going to be a decisive meeting

tonight at Sir Norman's house.

Oh. Well, alright, I can just make it.

Alright, Mr. Solo, I'll join you there tonight.

Thank you.

Get his medicine.

It's on the table over there.

'No, no, Mr. Solo.'

Back to the old wine press for you, I'm afraid.

Come on, professor, we haven't got all day.

Enormous strains on the heart take place in this process.

This man is in no condition to undergo a treatment now.

His pulse is racing, his systolic pressure

'is dangerously high.'

It is only the excitement.

I do not kill anyone for anybody!

I'm a scientist.

I do what is the right thing to do.

Be careful, professor.

With a small additional effort

it should be possible to replace you with a computer.

Ugh, this isn't leading us anywhere.

Why don't you let me talk to the good professor alone?

After all, it's my life he's worried about.

I'm certain I can persuade him

with the absolute necessity

of going through with it.

Very well, but don't be too long.

Stay here and keep an eye on things.

I'm in a situation that does not allow

consideration of fragility.

You do not understand what is involved here.

We reverse all the metabolic processes

'at an accelerated rate.'

'We go too fast, you'll end up as a boy.'

A dead boy.

All I need is a few more hours of strength

to do...what has to be done.

It is a great risk, Sir Norman.

Great causes require great risks.

When in doubt, press on, my friend, press on.

"Excelsior."

There is no one to help us but ourselves.

Lady Swickert.

Yes.

I'm Alexander Waverly.

I'm an old friend of Sir Norman's.

'I happened to be in London I felt I couldn't'

leave without paying my respects.

I'm sure Sir Norman will be delighted.

Uh, Mr. Jordin will take care of you, Mr. W-W..

- Waverly. - Oh, I'm so sorry.

I'm very bad at remembering new names.

Uh, would you excuse me, please?

Uh, gentlemen, shall we go in?

You please come with me, Mr. Waverly.

- So, you're Jordin. - You're humble servant, sir.

Young man, if you had half the manners

you pretend to have, you'd have first allowed me

to get rid of my coat and things.

Then you would've pointed your gun at me.

A nice point, sir. My apologies.

With regard to your apologies, you left my umbrella.

What makes you think it's so innocent as it seems?

Anything can be built into an umbrella.

Once more, I stand corrected.

'And once more I apologize.'

Yes, apologies, apologies.

But when one has good manners, there's no need to apologize.

'Where is Sir Norman?'

It, um, maybe a little while before he can see you.

Meantime, let me show you where you can wait.

Mr. Solo, there you are.

A young lady with you, of course.

Uh, Miss Sweet, Mr. Waverly.

- How do you do, sir? - Hello, Miss Sweet.

What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?

I'm afraid this trip wasn't necessary

I would've let you know sooner

but they cut off my mailing privileges.

Mr. Solo, I wouldn't have missed this excursion for anything.

However, I must be back in New York

by tomorrow noon latest.

So I'm afraid we're going to be somewhat pressed..

No pun intended.

I still think I should not have allowed you

to talk me into this, Sir Norman.

I do not like the way your heart beats.

I feel fine.

This is a great thing you've discovered, you and Lancer.

A dream of the age is realized.

A fountain of youth.

What a temptation to a man fighting the onset of age.

Is that so wrong? Huh.

Yes, it is.

It's a terrible thing when a dream becomes a nightmare.

I've lived with it for sometime now.

I know what it's done to me.

It's made me a helpless puppet

in the hands of those who control the process.

Uh, but, Sir Norman, they do not have the formula.

It is only I who possess the secret.

How long do you suppose it'll be

before they force you to disclose it?

Hmm.

I've thought of this many times, Sir Norman.

I'm afraid it is too late now.

Not if we bury the secret right here and now.

Then you'll have to bury..

You'll have to bury me with the secret.

That is the hardest part of it.

And now that I understand you better

let me remind you of the consequences of any betrayal.

I'm sorry, professor, but you do understand, don't you?

You'll have all the time in the world for explanations later.

Right now, you'll have to get changed.

You have a roomful of guests waiting for you.

Goodbye, professor.

I hope you know what has to be done.

Uh, we never did settle the matter

of my broken fender with Sir Norman.

So, would you mind opening the gates like a good fellow?

No visitors, tonight.

Some other time, perhaps.

'I hope I don't embarrass you.'

It's not my habit to disrobe in public.

But this time I'm afraid there's no help for it.

You-you can open your eyes again now.

Research and Development are rather proud of this device.

They produce it in three forms.

An explosion, uh, an ultrasonic..

...and this is an incendiary device of some sort, I believe.

Oh. Oh.

Mr. Solo will do the honors.

And if you and I are wise like Lot's wife

we'd better not look.

Go.

Now...once one is in a closed container

'he is forced to eliminate'

high explosive as a means of escape.

Unless he wants to escape by blowing himself in.

Yes?

Where's your friend?

Ah, Kuryakin, glad you came.

Here, you take this, I don't want it.

Now, Mr. Solo, if you and your associate here

will search out Dr. Gritsky

Miss Sweet and I will join the others in the house.

Come on, dear.

Good luck, darling.

Good evening, gentlemen.

You all know me, you know my reputation for punctuality

I'm late tonight.

But if I'm to look good at my age

the preparation takes a little longer.

We are gathered in this room here tonight

to discuss the future.

My future.

'But it is your future'

'that concerns me here.'

My sudden and miraculous

return to strength and vigor

is only an illusion.

But even an illusion can be

'a sinister weapon'

'in the hands of the enemy.'

'A few minutes ago'

I tried to kill

a gentle, kind old man

'to prevent him from being made use of by the enemy.'

'Unfortunately, I waited too long to pull the trigger.'

'Don't you make the same mistake.'

'You must destroy..'

You didn't expect this..

...did you, Norman?

Neither did I.

The wounds of time are never healed.

They just grow old with time itself.

Professor Gritsky.

Here are his notes.

Here's something.

'Looks like he had an overdose of his own medicine.'

Good thing for all of us at one time or another.

I'll have the professor's notebook, Mr. Kuryakin.

Toss it over here.

Carefully.

Jordin, why don't you give it up?

Why should I?

I have the notes.

We'll duplicate the process.

And after I destroy the machine

I will have sole possession

of the late Dr. Gritsky's secret.

I wouldn't do that if I were you.

I'll be with you in just a minute.

The doctor booby-trapped the machine.

Said so in his notes.

Aye. Well, thanks for letting me know, lad.

Well, at least he won't have to worry about getting any older.

No luck, gentlemen?

No, it's even beyond the ability

of the computers, they are unable

to decipher the formula.

Thank you.

Strange.

Locked in this book is the secret of immortality, perhaps.

Why do scientist always insist

on keeping their notes in code?

Well, they were able to decipher

the notebooks of Leonardo da Vinci

in a little less than 300 years.

That should offer us some hope.

I'm afraid, gentlemen..

...in my position and in my time of life

that's much too long to wait.