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Downloaded from
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[majestic music]
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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[haunting piano music]
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- Sure, whatever you
prefer to call it.
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00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:30,691
The human situation, or
the American nightmare
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00:01:30,724 --> 00:01:34,395
that's become the
international nightmare,
8
00:01:34,428 --> 00:01:40,268
or love, or extreme
awareness, or,
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00:01:40,301 --> 00:01:42,636
this interview is live, right?
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00:01:42,670 --> 00:01:45,506
I'd like to change the
subject 45 degrees,
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00:01:45,539 --> 00:01:50,678
if you don't mind, um, we
only have a few more minutes.
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00:01:50,711 --> 00:01:52,680
Okay, right.
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00:01:52,713 --> 00:01:54,648
I'd like to start a rumor.
14
00:01:54,682 --> 00:01:57,485
With some luck, a few
young writers listen
15
00:01:57,518 --> 00:01:59,487
to this broadcast,
and they can spread
16
00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:01,589
the rumor to their
friends and enemies.
17
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:09,497
Mm, now, now don't take
this the wrong way.
18
00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:12,366
What I'm about to say
is not a cry for help.
19
00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:16,370
It's not in any way connected
to, or interested in,
20
00:02:16,404 --> 00:02:20,674
the politics of victimhood,
and if anyone receives
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00:02:20,708 --> 00:02:25,179
it that way, all
the worse for him.
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00:02:25,213 --> 00:02:31,185
What I'd like to say is,
I'm going to kill myself.
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00:02:31,219 --> 00:02:32,920
Please don't interrupt me.
24
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:36,890
I am going to end
the life of Maya Dardel.
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00:02:36,924 --> 00:02:39,293
My work is in decline.
26
00:02:39,327 --> 00:02:43,297
I, I see no need to birth
a few more mediocre books
27
00:02:43,331 --> 00:02:48,436
and then finally in
my 70s and 80s squirt
28
00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:53,341
out a few more abortions
as embarrassing as,
29
00:02:55,243 --> 00:02:58,346
it's disrespectful
to name names.
30
00:02:58,379 --> 00:03:01,282
The point is, euthanasia.
31
00:03:01,315 --> 00:03:03,851
It's the thing to do.
32
00:03:03,884 --> 00:03:07,955
I don't have any family,
33
00:03:07,988 --> 00:03:11,559
so I'm going to need
an heir and an executor.
34
00:03:11,592 --> 00:03:14,228
So I'm going to be interviewing
youngish writers here,
35
00:03:14,262 --> 00:03:16,497
at my house, in Los
Gatos, California,
36
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:20,301
for this position, starting now.
37
00:03:20,334 --> 00:03:23,003
Right, right and
the guy I pick gets
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00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:27,508
my house and my archives
and publishing rights,
39
00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:31,245
all my knickknacks and dishes
40
00:03:31,279 --> 00:03:33,714
and music and books
when I'm gone.
41
00:03:40,388 --> 00:03:42,856
Hm.
42
00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:45,926
So anybody talented and capable
43
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:51,432
can email me by emailing
the Ithurburn Agency.
44
00:03:51,465 --> 00:03:56,604
My agent's name is Lucas
Marcy, Lucas M-A-R-cy.
45
00:03:56,637 --> 00:04:03,644
Mm hmm, yep, Luc's
thrilled, death's lucrative.
46
00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:04,645
Um.
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00:04:06,547 --> 00:04:08,449
Of course I'm serious.
48
00:04:09,983 --> 00:04:11,952
Don't be narrow-minded.
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00:04:11,985 --> 00:04:15,589
I want young but professional,
published writers of poetry,
50
00:04:15,623 --> 00:04:19,860
but I'd consider a poetic
novelist or essayist.
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00:04:21,562 --> 00:04:27,034
Also, also, women
need not apply.
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00:04:27,067 --> 00:04:30,738
Well because I don't
like women's writing.
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00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:32,039
Yes.
54
00:04:33,374 --> 00:04:36,009
No, no.
55
00:04:36,043 --> 00:04:40,714
Dickinson yes, some of it.
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00:04:40,748 --> 00:04:42,516
No, no.
57
00:04:44,352 --> 00:04:45,519
Wolfe was a man.
58
00:04:47,355 --> 00:04:51,959
No, no, George Elliot was a man.
59
00:04:51,992 --> 00:04:54,294
Yes, no.
60
00:04:55,863 --> 00:04:59,533
Sontag, Sontag was
entirely a guy.
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00:04:59,567 --> 00:05:02,069
I know, I slept with her.
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00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:10,678
So any of you young
men out there,
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00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:12,980
if you think you're it,
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00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:16,350
go ahead and look
up my agent, yes?
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00:05:27,395 --> 00:05:29,763
- [Man] I can show you
my work right now here.
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00:05:29,797 --> 00:05:31,932
- Leave it on the floor.
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00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:37,371
I probably should've
had you email me some
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00:05:37,405 --> 00:05:40,374
of your work before you
drove all the way up here.
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00:05:40,408 --> 00:05:45,112
- Right, I can, I can send you
some from my phone right now.
70
00:05:45,145 --> 00:05:47,781
- [Maya] Put that
back. They disgust me.
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00:05:47,815 --> 00:05:48,782
- Phones?
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00:05:50,651 --> 00:05:53,821
- Other people's phones.
73
00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:57,491
- Right, totally, no,
I totally understand that.
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00:05:57,525 --> 00:06:00,628
They're like, other
people's phones.
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00:06:00,661 --> 00:06:03,731
You know, they touch your ear.
76
00:06:03,764 --> 00:06:06,400
They have like wax on them,
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00:06:06,434 --> 00:06:09,503
other people's girlfriends'
photos on them.
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00:06:09,537 --> 00:06:13,907
- Tell me with extreme candor
what you think of your talent.
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00:06:13,941 --> 00:06:18,746
- Totally, I can.
talk about that.
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00:06:18,779 --> 00:06:20,113
Um.
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00:06:31,559 --> 00:06:32,726
Done.
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00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:34,528
- [Maya] What?
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00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:37,765
- No you just, you
just have to know.
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00:06:37,798 --> 00:06:39,600
- [Maya] Know what?
85
00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:44,104
- Do you have
a bathroom I could use?
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00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:46,039
- [Maya] I don't like other
people in my bathroom.
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00:06:46,073 --> 00:06:47,908
- It's cool.
88
00:06:52,045 --> 00:06:54,482
- What do you think of me?
89
00:06:54,515 --> 00:06:58,018
- I love your work, I love
Shadow, Twenty-seven Fold.
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00:06:58,051 --> 00:07:01,522
- I meant what do you
think of me physically?
91
00:07:01,555 --> 00:07:03,491
- Physically?
- Mm.
92
00:07:05,626 --> 00:07:07,661
- I'm not really, um.
93
00:07:07,695 --> 00:07:10,531
- [Maya] Be candid, Moses.
94
00:07:10,564 --> 00:07:11,732
- Candid?
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00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:13,133
- [Maya] Very.
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00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:17,638
- I'm not really comfortable.
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00:07:17,671 --> 00:07:19,006
- Who's comfortable?
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00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:20,908
Just be honest.
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00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:23,544
- What, do I think you're
a good-looking woman?
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00:07:23,577 --> 00:07:24,545
- [Maya] Yes.
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00:07:24,578 --> 00:07:26,146
- I mean, yeah.
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00:07:26,179 --> 00:07:30,651
- But uglier than
women your age.
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00:07:30,684 --> 00:07:34,922
I'm a good piece of fruit
too long in the fridge.
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00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:37,124
- That's, isn't that, like.
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00:07:37,157 --> 00:07:40,027
- But good-looking enough.
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00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:42,896
At least as I sit here across
from you in what appears
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00:07:42,930 --> 00:07:47,868
to be some kind of
impenetrable Artemis state,
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00:07:47,901 --> 00:07:50,538
enough that you're
probably wondering what
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00:07:50,571 --> 00:07:53,541
it'd be like to
command me, strip me.
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00:07:53,574 --> 00:07:54,775
- Strip you?
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00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:57,077
- Men are this kind of machine.
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00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:59,880
Women my age have
the last outer crust
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00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:02,683
of our prettiness
left, and that can be
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00:08:02,716 --> 00:08:06,720
combined with haughtiness
or real superiority.
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00:08:06,754 --> 00:08:10,724
Until a young man badly wants
to break that outer crust.
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00:08:10,758 --> 00:08:12,960
He wants to prove this and that
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00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:15,162
to himself, and
the middle-aged woman.
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00:08:15,195 --> 00:08:17,164
But you see,
the woman's unwise if she
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00:08:17,197 --> 00:08:18,932
allows herself to be stripped.
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00:08:18,966 --> 00:08:21,569
The thing about Artemis is that,
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00:08:21,602 --> 00:08:24,137
is that her nakedness in
the pool in the woods,
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00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:27,541
when Actaeon sees her, yes?
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00:08:27,575 --> 00:08:28,942
- Um, yeah.
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00:08:28,976 --> 00:08:31,144
- Her nakedness
is not just a myth
125
00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:33,146
about the virginity of maidens.
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00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:35,816
It's a myth also
about the final,
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00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:39,653
brittle sex appeal
of older women.
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00:08:43,256 --> 00:08:45,759
If you were to see me naked,
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00:08:45,793 --> 00:08:48,562
like Actaeon,
you would have to die.
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00:08:48,596 --> 00:08:50,998
[Moses scoffs]
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00:08:55,302 --> 00:08:58,572
You're a mature man, correct?
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00:08:58,606 --> 00:09:00,207
- Yeah.
133
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,710
- You're not one of
these immature fumblers,
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00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:07,347
one of these boys who
can't find the clitoris?
135
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:10,818
- Like a, sorry,
a woman's clitoris?
136
00:09:14,021 --> 00:09:15,823
- [Maya] Come here.
137
00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:24,598
Nearly any experience
is good for a writer.
138
00:09:24,632 --> 00:09:26,967
The same can't be said
for those who don't write.
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00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,201
- [Moses] Yeah I
actually brought
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00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:29,937
my work, I'd like to show you.
141
00:09:29,970 --> 00:09:31,705
- [Maya] Come, sit.
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00:09:34,207 --> 00:09:35,843
- [Moses] [Chuckles] You want me
143
00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:37,911
to sit next to you on the couch?
144
00:09:37,945 --> 00:09:39,312
- [Maya] Here.
145
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:41,715
- [Moses] Here?
146
00:09:41,749 --> 00:09:42,883
- [Maya] Exactly.
147
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:46,787
- [Moses] Okay.
148
00:09:48,121 --> 00:09:49,089
Here?
149
00:09:50,023 --> 00:09:50,991
Okay.
150
00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:57,698
Sorry, I'm.
151
00:10:01,769 --> 00:10:04,705
- Take off my tights.
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00:10:04,738 --> 00:10:07,307
[Maya and Moses chuckle]
153
00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:15,048
[coughs]
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00:10:35,202 --> 00:10:37,771
[Maya moans]
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00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:43,410
You're surprisingly
not bad at that.
156
00:10:45,846 --> 00:10:46,814
- Thanks.
157
00:10:48,949 --> 00:10:50,383
- [Maya] Would you like
to show me your poems?
158
00:10:54,054 --> 00:10:56,890
But first go clean your face.
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00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:07,467
- [Moses] Should I
just use the sink?
160
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,402
- Mm.
- Okay.
161
00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:35,028
- To save us time why
don't you just show me what
162
00:11:35,062 --> 00:11:39,266
you're certain is your
best work in that binder.
163
00:11:39,299 --> 00:11:41,034
- My best?
164
00:11:41,068 --> 00:11:42,369
- Mm.
165
00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:54,848
You read it to me.
166
00:12:00,988 --> 00:12:04,357
- Holy shit, um,
that's the title.
167
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:09,362
Holy shit, this Campbell's Soup
168
00:12:09,396 --> 00:12:12,432
is tasty, though
it, come, though.
169
00:12:15,803 --> 00:12:18,772
Holy shit this
Campbell's Soup is tasty,
170
00:12:18,806 --> 00:12:22,342
though come to think of it,
it tastes like nothing
171
00:12:22,375 --> 00:12:26,780
plus the idea of Warhol with
his super creepy friends,
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00:12:26,814 --> 00:12:30,017
so many more than I have,
speaking fondly of the times
173
00:12:30,050 --> 00:12:33,286
they all had doing
nothing, doing nothing,
174
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:37,891
doing nothing, doing nothing,
making a hamlet sandwich
175
00:12:37,925 --> 00:12:42,229
I have to make for myself,
because I have no friends.
176
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,069
- I'm adjuncting a
composition course
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00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:50,938
at Hartwick College
in the spring.
178
00:12:50,971 --> 00:12:55,042
That's in New York,
the Catskills, mm,
179
00:12:55,075 --> 00:12:58,511
I got my MFA last year, from
the Iowa Writers Workshop.
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00:12:58,545 --> 00:13:03,083
And I'm the editor-in-chief of
a small magazine, a webzine.
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00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:04,952
- [Maya] I went to Iowa.
182
00:13:04,985 --> 00:13:06,987
- Did you?
183
00:13:07,020 --> 00:13:10,457
- Back when everyone smoked
cigarettes and nobody got AIDS.
184
00:13:12,259 --> 00:13:14,227
- Okay, there
wouldn't be any kind
185
00:13:14,261 --> 00:13:17,230
of legal complications,
would there?
186
00:13:17,264 --> 00:13:20,200
What I mean is, when you,
if you select me.
187
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,402
I'll be far away with an alibi.
188
00:13:22,435 --> 00:13:24,137
I don't mean to be rude,
189
00:13:24,171 --> 00:13:26,239
I just think it's
best to be up front.
190
00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:29,409
You don't expect me to
be here, to help you?
191
00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:32,412
- This is not the process.
192
00:13:32,445 --> 00:13:34,247
- What?
193
00:13:34,281 --> 00:13:35,382
- [Maya] The process,
it's not the process.
194
00:13:35,415 --> 00:13:36,850
- What's the process?
195
00:13:36,884 --> 00:13:38,218
- First we talk about your work,
196
00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:40,420
and then I, I was probably--
197
00:13:40,453 --> 00:13:44,191
- Well that stuff that I sent
you is actually quite old.
198
00:13:44,224 --> 00:13:45,993
I just sent it because it seems
199
00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:47,861
to do well with the
editors of magazines.
200
00:13:47,895 --> 00:13:49,062
I'd like to show you what
I'm writing currently.
201
00:13:49,096 --> 00:13:50,497
- [Maya] Show me.
202
00:13:50,530 --> 00:13:54,234
- It's uh, it's an epic poem.
203
00:13:54,267 --> 00:13:56,503
Or well, considering that idea.
204
00:13:56,536 --> 00:13:59,172
It's uh, well,
better to show you.
205
00:14:15,555 --> 00:14:18,225
- [Maya] Cimputer, hmm?
206
00:14:18,258 --> 00:14:20,227
Ever been to the Tate
Modern in London?
207
00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:22,029
- No.
208
00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:23,030
- But you've been to
modern art museums.
209
00:14:23,063 --> 00:14:24,597
- Of course.
210
00:14:24,631 --> 00:14:26,599
It seems ironic now,
but I actually wrote my
211
00:14:26,633 --> 00:14:28,401
undergraduate thesis on the
Transgressive Corporeality
212
00:14:28,435 --> 00:14:30,137
of Mannequins and Humans
in the Early Work of -
213
00:14:30,170 --> 00:14:32,439
- Imagine three people
in a modern art museum.
214
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:34,541
The first is a pot-bellied
father of four from
215
00:14:34,574 --> 00:14:38,178
Kentucky or provincial France
or middle Russia somewhere.
216
00:14:38,211 --> 00:14:41,448
He's a tourist, he only
likes landscapes and nudes
217
00:14:41,481 --> 00:14:43,483
and paintings of
battles and ships.
218
00:14:43,516 --> 00:14:46,453
He's the guy who looks the
Jackson Pollock the same
219
00:14:46,486 --> 00:14:51,458
way he looks at your
generation's latest
abstract knockoff
220
00:14:51,491 --> 00:14:55,195
and he says to himself
about both, Christ,
221
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:57,597
what a con-job,
my kid can paint this.
222
00:14:57,630 --> 00:14:59,066
- Hm.
223
00:14:59,099 --> 00:15:00,633
Right, my kid can paint this.
224
00:15:00,667 --> 00:15:03,170
- Now imagine a second
person in the museum.
225
00:15:03,203 --> 00:15:07,407
This is you, this is
an educated person.
226
00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:13,113
He's visiting the museum in
an anxious, critical capacity.
227
00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:16,316
He goes into the room the
tourist father just left,
228
00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:18,351
and looks at the Pollock
and looks at the knockoff,
229
00:15:18,385 --> 00:15:20,453
and because the knockoff
was painted very recently,
230
00:15:20,487 --> 00:15:24,457
it gets his attention,
and he stands there wondering
231
00:15:24,491 --> 00:15:27,227
if it's better than his
own mysterious canvases
232
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:30,463
full of similar random
shreds of form and color.
233
00:15:32,565 --> 00:15:34,067
- This is me?
234
00:15:34,101 --> 00:15:35,535
- [Maya] This is you.
235
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:38,671
- I think it's always better not
236
00:15:38,705 --> 00:15:40,440
to arbitrarily stereotype a--
237
00:15:40,473 --> 00:15:43,476
- Now, imagine a third
person in the museum.
238
00:15:43,510 --> 00:15:47,247
This is me, I'll look at the
Pollock and the knockoff.
239
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:50,083
I like the Pollock for its
rhythm and originality.
240
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:53,020
The knockoff has some
qualities I like,
241
00:15:53,053 --> 00:15:57,257
but it's half a century too
late, it's not original.
242
00:15:57,290 --> 00:16:01,261
And the longer I look at it,
the less I like it, why?
243
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:03,997
Because I hear a little
voice inside me saying,
244
00:16:04,031 --> 00:16:07,234
Christ, my kid could paint this.
245
00:16:07,267 --> 00:16:09,469
And then I hear another voice
inside me saying, you don't
246
00:16:09,502 --> 00:16:13,273
have a kid, and you sound
like a tourist from Kentucky.
247
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,442
You're not part
of the cool crowd.
248
00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,477
Other people get it,
not you though.
249
00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:20,313
And then I hear a
third voice in my head.
250
00:16:20,347 --> 00:16:22,149
No, Maya, it's
okay, you do get it,
251
00:16:22,182 --> 00:16:24,184
this really is a
mediocre painting.
252
00:16:24,217 --> 00:16:25,718
This really could've
been painted
253
00:16:25,752 --> 00:16:28,455
by a kid or even a cimputer.
254
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:34,327
And then the people in
my head start arguing.
255
00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:38,365
- Are you saying
that my work is--
256
00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:40,367
- [Maya] Shit?
257
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:44,471
Not quite, it's more like
chewed but undigested food.
258
00:16:46,239 --> 00:16:49,142
You're young,
there's hope for you.
259
00:16:57,317 --> 00:16:59,619
- In the back corner.
260
00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:00,653
That piece.
261
00:17:03,323 --> 00:17:06,059
Do you consider that good art?
262
00:17:06,093 --> 00:17:08,495
- That's a different
story, that's not paint.
263
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:11,831
That's blood and
human brain matter.
264
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:14,767
Isn't that terrible?
265
00:17:14,801 --> 00:17:18,338
But hey, you like cerebral art.
266
00:17:20,273 --> 00:17:22,109
She had lung cancer.
267
00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:24,344
That was her very last
painting, a perverse friend
268
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:28,281
of mine bought it at an auction
for my birthday last year.
269
00:17:28,315 --> 00:17:31,284
- Hm, I think what you
and your museum-going self
270
00:17:31,318 --> 00:17:34,787
and your third self are missing
is a purposeful negation.
271
00:17:34,821 --> 00:17:37,490
This is apparently
counterintuitive.
272
00:17:37,524 --> 00:17:39,526
Okay.
273
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:43,496
Purposefulness would seem to
have a positive component, yes?
274
00:17:43,530 --> 00:17:46,266
It positively is negation.
275
00:17:46,299 --> 00:17:49,169
But here's where I might
take issue with my own poem.
276
00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:51,738
Negation positively is negation,
277
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:53,706
but only within
a conceptual system,
278
00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:57,477
the perhaps a priori system
of logical coherence.
279
00:17:57,510 --> 00:18:00,813
So what I'm doing
isn't really writing,
280
00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:04,484
but unwriting, you see?
281
00:18:04,517 --> 00:18:08,521
My negation has no positive
aspect, it simply isn't.
282
00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:10,290
- That's marvelous.
283
00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:13,560
- Thank you.
284
00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:16,263
- Did you really say my negation
285
00:18:16,296 --> 00:18:18,798
has no positive aspect to me?
286
00:18:18,831 --> 00:18:20,800
- Yes.
287
00:18:20,833 --> 00:18:25,172
Yeah, I think it's blatant
at the third line, apacity.
288
00:18:29,576 --> 00:18:31,478
- Do you have a wife?
289
00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:35,615
Or a girlfriend?
290
00:18:35,648 --> 00:18:37,784
- No, no, not exactly.
291
00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,854
- [Maya] Are you
able to carry out
292
00:18:41,888 --> 00:18:43,890
a difficult task from
beginning to end?
293
00:18:47,694 --> 00:18:51,364
It's no good, just get in
there and roughen it up.
294
00:18:51,398 --> 00:18:54,234
Cut was not finished,
you need to cut.
295
00:18:54,267 --> 00:18:56,203
Jesuit priest, what
were you thinking?
296
00:18:56,236 --> 00:18:57,937
It's actually in
very poor taste.
297
00:18:57,970 --> 00:18:59,806
- [Man] Just give me two
seconds, one, two, three--
298
00:18:59,839 --> 00:19:01,608
- [Maya] Why don't you go home
299
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,776
and rewrite this and
come back, all right?
300
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:05,545
- 21, 22.
301
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:06,546
23, 24.
302
00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:09,649
25.
303
00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:29,802
- [Maya] Everything
is turning sharper.
304
00:19:32,705 --> 00:19:35,475
This is called being old.
305
00:19:38,711 --> 00:19:41,848
It turns sharp for a moment
before it turns blurry,
306
00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:46,553
everything does,
at a certain age.
307
00:19:49,556 --> 00:19:52,492
What is this species
of thought that is not
308
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:59,266
a memory because it never
happened, but so memory-like?
309
00:19:59,299 --> 00:20:02,869
This thought of
myself at 40 maybe.
310
00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:07,940
Holding a baby.
311
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,756
- [Man] There's such
a strange green.
312
00:20:25,358 --> 00:20:27,727
Amphibian green in this view.
313
00:20:33,366 --> 00:20:36,636
- I like your sweater,
where'd you buy it?
314
00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:40,573
- This?
315
00:20:40,607 --> 00:20:41,741
- [Maya] Mm.
316
00:20:44,344 --> 00:20:46,513
I don't, I don't remember.
317
00:20:48,348 --> 00:20:50,650
- Come on, don't tell
me you don't remember.
318
00:20:50,683 --> 00:20:52,952
That's a $400 sweater.
319
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:01,628
- [Man] What kind
of tree is this?
320
00:21:01,661 --> 00:21:03,396
- Horse chestnut.
321
00:21:06,566 --> 00:21:07,534
- Chest nut.
322
00:21:09,569 --> 00:21:10,870
Chest--
- What?
323
00:21:10,903 --> 00:21:11,871
- What?
324
00:21:33,860 --> 00:21:36,663
You have a lot of glass.
325
00:21:38,498 --> 00:21:41,701
Are these all filled with glass?
326
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:47,940
- I have a lot of
porcelain and stemware.
327
00:21:47,974 --> 00:21:49,509
- [Man] Stemware.
328
00:21:53,780 --> 00:21:56,849
Don't you like how all these
329
00:21:59,586 --> 00:22:01,087
Anglo-Saxon words?
330
00:22:06,393 --> 00:22:08,628
- [Maya] What's this?
331
00:22:08,661 --> 00:22:15,334
- [Man] That's when they
crush into each other.
332
00:22:16,603 --> 00:22:17,537
- Mm.
333
00:22:19,105 --> 00:22:22,074
- Chestnut, stemware.
334
00:22:23,876 --> 00:22:24,844
Foxfire.
335
00:22:26,613 --> 00:22:27,947
Footstool.
336
00:22:29,782 --> 00:22:31,117
- Outhouse.
337
00:22:36,589 --> 00:22:38,558
Rat hole.
338
00:22:38,591 --> 00:22:39,792
Hm, rat hole.
339
00:22:41,794 --> 00:22:42,929
- Mouthwash.
340
00:22:46,132 --> 00:22:48,167
Are you trying to
ingratiate yourself
341
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:50,603
by playing language games?
342
00:22:52,505 --> 00:22:53,540
- What?
343
00:22:53,573 --> 00:22:54,507
No.
344
00:22:55,608 --> 00:22:56,576
I was--
345
00:22:56,609 --> 00:22:58,578
- It's okay.
346
00:22:58,611 --> 00:22:59,912
I like the word,
347
00:23:02,615 --> 00:23:04,551
chestnut, hummingbird.
348
00:23:05,852 --> 00:23:07,554
Nightmare.
349
00:23:07,587 --> 00:23:09,121
- Of course you do.
350
00:23:09,155 --> 00:23:11,724
I know, you use it
as an adjective in--
351
00:23:11,758 --> 00:23:19,566
- Please, don't quote me to me.
352
00:23:19,599 --> 00:23:20,567
- Okay.
353
00:23:24,804 --> 00:23:26,506
- Are you gay?
354
00:23:26,539 --> 00:23:27,507
- What?
355
00:23:27,540 --> 00:23:28,541
I was just, um.
356
00:23:30,877 --> 00:23:31,844
Rat hole.
357
00:23:47,627 --> 00:23:48,995
I know about porcelain.
358
00:23:49,028 --> 00:23:50,229
- [Maya] What?
359
00:23:50,262 --> 00:23:52,599
- [Man] I know about the colors.
360
00:23:52,632 --> 00:23:57,103
- What does this mean,
you know about porcelain.
361
00:23:57,136 --> 00:23:59,572
- You probably
already know this,
362
00:23:59,606 --> 00:24:06,746
but there were these
chemists in Vincennes.
363
00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:11,584
These chemists they would
um, grind the colors.
364
00:24:11,618 --> 00:24:14,621
Then they started to experiment.
365
00:24:14,654 --> 00:24:20,593
I think they first had
some success with yellow.
366
00:24:20,627 --> 00:24:24,997
And then lapis blue, like,
367
00:24:25,031 --> 00:24:28,635
lapis blue like in
this piece here.
368
00:24:39,846 --> 00:24:42,615
You already know that.
369
00:24:42,649 --> 00:24:43,916
- [Maya] Tell me.
370
00:24:47,219 --> 00:24:53,593
- Well, then, in 1750-something
they, they discovered green.
371
00:24:53,626 --> 00:24:56,195
And then blue celeste.
372
00:24:56,228 --> 00:25:00,199
And then they discovered
the rose colors last.
373
00:25:02,001 --> 00:25:04,270
And then they killed
the king and queen
374
00:25:04,303 --> 00:25:07,607
and some of the
porcelain makers.
375
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:10,309
Also I was in Chicago.
376
00:25:10,342 --> 00:25:16,583
And the porcelain collection
at the Art Institute,
377
00:25:16,616 --> 00:25:23,189
there's this plate,
or a serving platter,
378
00:25:23,222 --> 00:25:28,094
and on it is a
scene of what they
379
00:25:28,127 --> 00:25:34,767
call peasant life,
or pastoral life.
380
00:25:34,801 --> 00:25:40,573
It's a green and rose design,
and written around the rim
381
00:25:40,607 --> 00:25:45,778
the platter's rim,
Pensent-ils au raisin?
382
00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:50,850
- [Maya] Are they
thinking about the grapes?
383
00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:52,652
- Yes.
384
00:25:52,685 --> 00:25:56,188
And I was with my friend
Marie at the time.
385
00:25:56,222 --> 00:26:01,127
And she saw the plate first
and translated the caption,
386
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:05,064
and somehow I misheard
her, and I thought
387
00:26:05,097 --> 00:26:09,201
that she'd said are they
thinking about the Greeks?
388
00:26:09,235 --> 00:26:12,038
- Where are you going with this?
389
00:26:13,372 --> 00:26:15,875
- I'm not going anywhere, um.
390
00:26:18,645 --> 00:26:22,148
I just thought it was
beautiful that there
391
00:26:22,181 --> 00:26:25,384
could be some people on
a plate and then some other
392
00:26:25,417 --> 00:26:30,189
people eating off the
plate in the 18th century,
393
00:26:30,222 --> 00:26:33,392
just some people in the
18th century in France
394
00:26:33,425 --> 00:26:37,196
being asked by a plate if
maybe the people they were
395
00:26:37,229 --> 00:26:41,367
eating off of might be
thinking about the Greeks?
396
00:26:45,805 --> 00:26:47,774
- Are you responsible?
397
00:26:49,441 --> 00:26:51,043
- [Man] Responsible?
398
00:26:53,145 --> 00:26:55,948
- [Maya] Do you pay
all your bills on time?
399
00:26:55,982 --> 00:26:59,351
Do you respond to emails?
400
00:26:59,385 --> 00:27:04,223
- [Man] I don't, I don't
really have that many bills.
401
00:27:04,256 --> 00:27:06,358
- [Maya] Why are
you living in Texas?
402
00:27:08,761 --> 00:27:10,997
- [Man] I don't know.
403
00:27:11,030 --> 00:27:13,733
My mother lives there.
404
00:27:13,766 --> 00:27:19,371
- [Maya] Are you one of these,
codependent with your mother?
405
00:27:24,176 --> 00:27:27,213
- [Man] So this
is Silicon Valley?
406
00:27:27,246 --> 00:27:31,784
- [Maya] You're on top of the
south wall of Silicon Valley.
407
00:27:31,818 --> 00:27:35,121
- [Man] Kevin said
you grow grapes?
408
00:27:36,956 --> 00:27:38,891
- [Maya] Top acre.
409
00:27:38,925 --> 00:27:42,194
I don't do it, a company
does it and gives me a cut.
410
00:27:46,265 --> 00:27:48,901
- [Man] Why are you
going to kill yourself?
411
00:27:48,935 --> 00:27:53,405
You could write five more books
like The Monday Metaphysics.
412
00:28:00,179 --> 00:28:04,416
- [Maya] Is that your
favorite book of mine?
413
00:28:04,450 --> 00:28:05,785
- [Man] Maybe.
414
00:28:08,087 --> 00:28:15,427
- I was [exhales] 31
when I wrote that.
415
00:28:15,461 --> 00:28:20,432
Do you think I'm
remotely similar
416
00:28:20,466 --> 00:28:24,436
to whatever woman
wrote that book?
417
00:28:24,470 --> 00:28:25,972
[gunshots pop]
418
00:28:26,005 --> 00:28:27,239
- [Man] Are those gunshots?
419
00:28:27,273 --> 00:28:30,109
- Ah, my wacky neighbor.
420
00:28:30,142 --> 00:28:34,413
Nothing alarming, target
practice, several times a week.
421
00:28:42,889 --> 00:28:45,124
- I think you're similar.
422
00:28:47,126 --> 00:28:52,231
I think that you
could write good books
423
00:28:52,264 --> 00:28:55,201
that aren't similar
to your old books.
424
00:28:57,303 --> 00:29:01,140
I don't think you should do it.
425
00:29:01,173 --> 00:29:03,943
- Are you here to
inherit my estate
426
00:29:03,976 --> 00:29:07,013
or to convince me
not to kill myself?
427
00:29:07,046 --> 00:29:08,747
- I don't know why I'm here.
428
00:29:11,884 --> 00:29:14,420
I just don't like the idea of
429
00:29:16,188 --> 00:29:18,891
death, just sitting there.
430
00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:42,214
- [Maya] Mm.
431
00:29:55,061 --> 00:29:58,497
- What's this horseshit
people telling me?
432
00:30:02,068 --> 00:30:04,470
- You know, it's worked
for a few others.
433
00:30:04,503 --> 00:30:08,074
Plath, Sexton, Woolf.
434
00:30:08,107 --> 00:30:12,344
It kind of jolts you into
a different category.
435
00:30:12,378 --> 00:30:16,482
- Blech, tastes like horseshit.
436
00:30:16,515 --> 00:30:18,517
Shit of a horse.
437
00:30:18,550 --> 00:30:23,222
- You know, priests don't
pay taxes, neither should we.
438
00:30:24,523 --> 00:30:26,025
- [Woman] Who's we?
439
00:30:26,058 --> 00:30:27,093
- Us.
440
00:30:27,126 --> 00:30:28,627
Culture creators.
441
00:30:28,660 --> 00:30:32,464
Not you, you're a
tune-inner drop-outer.
442
00:30:32,498 --> 00:30:34,466
You're anti-culture.
443
00:30:34,500 --> 00:30:36,235
- Culture my yeast.
444
00:30:38,504 --> 00:30:39,972
- Exactly.
445
00:30:40,006 --> 00:30:42,408
- [Woman] Fucking bacteria.
446
00:30:45,511 --> 00:30:47,880
Prepare your brain.
447
00:30:47,914 --> 00:30:52,418
I'm gonna teach you a new
paradox, crocodile paradox.
448
00:30:57,323 --> 00:31:01,427
A crocodile snatches a drag
queen from a riverbank.
449
00:31:01,460 --> 00:31:04,296
The queen mother is
there for some reason
450
00:31:04,330 --> 00:31:09,101
and pleads with the crocodile,
please don't eat my son.
451
00:31:09,135 --> 00:31:12,304
The croc says Your Majesty,
I will only not eat
452
00:31:12,338 --> 00:31:14,941
your daughter if you can
guess correctly whether
453
00:31:14,974 --> 00:31:19,078
or not I'm really gonna eat
your skinny-ass daughter.
454
00:31:19,111 --> 00:31:25,051
So there's no problem
if the mother guesses
455
00:31:25,084 --> 00:31:28,287
that the crocodile
won't eat her son.
456
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:31,257
She's either right or wrong.
457
00:31:31,290 --> 00:31:35,494
But if she guesses he will
eat him, it's fucked up.
458
00:31:35,527 --> 00:31:41,500
- You told me this one years
ago, without the queens.
459
00:31:41,533 --> 00:31:43,235
Do you still nap?
460
00:31:46,538 --> 00:31:48,607
- I don't know.
461
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:51,243
- I used to nap.
462
00:31:51,277 --> 00:31:53,946
If I got caught, by Ismail even,
463
00:31:53,980 --> 00:31:56,315
I'd lie and say
I wasn't sleeping.
464
00:32:00,987 --> 00:32:04,590
It's so undignified to be caught
465
00:32:04,623 --> 00:32:07,559
sleeping in the
middle of the day.
466
00:32:12,764 --> 00:32:15,434
- Yeah but if the
mother is right
467
00:32:15,467 --> 00:32:21,173
and the crocodile really
is gonna eat her son,
468
00:32:21,207 --> 00:32:23,442
then he has to return him.
469
00:32:29,515 --> 00:32:30,449
Fucked up.
470
00:32:34,053 --> 00:32:37,456
I wouldn't publicly
joke about suicide.
471
00:32:48,534 --> 00:32:50,302
What are you doing?
472
00:32:51,603 --> 00:32:53,605
- [Maya] Sailing to Byzantium.
473
00:33:00,812 --> 00:33:04,016
Were you surprised I
invited you up here?
474
00:33:04,050 --> 00:33:06,485
- [Paul] I don't know, do you
have a lot of guys applying?
475
00:33:06,518 --> 00:33:08,520
- [Maya] Mm.
476
00:33:08,554 --> 00:33:11,490
But did you feel encouraged
after our first phone call?
477
00:33:11,523 --> 00:33:13,325
- [Man] Uh.
478
00:33:13,359 --> 00:33:16,095
I felt like you understand
that I'm an adult.
479
00:33:16,128 --> 00:33:19,498
Like you could tell
I don't fuck up.
480
00:33:19,531 --> 00:33:21,500
- I researched you
on the Internet.
481
00:33:21,533 --> 00:33:24,503
I read your little
squib in N Plus One.
482
00:33:24,536 --> 00:33:26,372
Do you dislike Americans as much
483
00:33:26,405 --> 00:33:29,308
as you dislike the
Russians and the Israelis?
484
00:33:29,341 --> 00:33:32,411
- Well, I'm
egalitarian, you know?
485
00:33:32,444 --> 00:33:36,215
I think all cultures and
ethnicities should suffer
486
00:33:36,248 --> 00:33:40,519
the same amount of abuse,
Turks piss me off for example.
487
00:33:40,552 --> 00:33:42,221
- My ex is a Turk.
488
00:33:42,254 --> 00:33:43,689
- [Man] Yeah, I know.
489
00:33:43,722 --> 00:33:44,690
- You know?
490
00:33:44,723 --> 00:33:45,757
- [Man] Sure.
491
00:33:47,193 --> 00:33:48,527
- What about Chinese?
492
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:53,499
- Um, bribery, dragon breath.
493
00:33:53,532 --> 00:33:55,501
Too many male people.
494
00:33:55,534 --> 00:33:56,468
- Swiss?
495
00:33:58,370 --> 00:34:02,774
- Smug, boring, white, mm.
496
00:34:04,610 --> 00:34:05,811
- Saudis?
497
00:34:05,844 --> 00:34:07,579
- Oh Saudis, yeah sure, Saudis,
498
00:34:07,613 --> 00:34:09,415
If a woman in Saudi Arabia wants
499
00:34:09,448 --> 00:34:11,683
to press charges,
she needs four witnesses.
500
00:34:11,717 --> 00:34:16,388
So as long as you gangbang
with only three friends.
501
00:34:16,422 --> 00:34:18,524
- Canadians.
502
00:34:18,557 --> 00:34:20,226
- [Man] Boring.
503
00:34:20,259 --> 00:34:21,393
- Mexicans?
504
00:34:26,565 --> 00:34:29,368
- I don't have a
problem with Mexicans.
505
00:34:29,401 --> 00:34:30,502
- Hm.
506
00:34:31,637 --> 00:34:33,305
- How am I doing?
507
00:34:35,274 --> 00:34:37,209
- [Maya] Doing what?
508
00:34:37,243 --> 00:34:39,211
- Do you like me, do you
see me as executor material?
509
00:34:39,245 --> 00:34:43,782
- Possibly, what's your
familiarity with publishing?
510
00:34:43,815 --> 00:34:46,885
- I have an agent, she can't
get my book a deal, though.
511
00:34:46,918 --> 00:34:49,188
- [Maya] Why not?
512
00:34:49,221 --> 00:34:51,490
- Probably it isn't very good.
513
00:34:51,523 --> 00:34:54,260
- [Maya] Why not?
514
00:34:54,293 --> 00:34:58,230
- I don't know, maybe
the same reason you're--
515
00:34:58,264 --> 00:35:01,600
- [Maya] Perhaps it's
the opposite reason.
516
00:35:01,633 --> 00:35:03,669
- Yeah, maybe.
517
00:35:03,702 --> 00:35:09,541
But can I ask you a borderline
rude direct question?
518
00:35:09,575 --> 00:35:11,543
Are you sick?
519
00:35:11,577 --> 00:35:14,180
Do you have something terminal?
520
00:35:14,213 --> 00:35:17,616
- [Maya] I wouldn't tell
you if I did, but no.
521
00:35:17,649 --> 00:35:19,385
- Well if I were terminal,
522
00:35:19,418 --> 00:35:21,753
I'd probably take
a bunch of heroin.
523
00:35:21,787 --> 00:35:22,754
You ever try it?
524
00:35:22,788 --> 00:35:23,889
- [Maya] No.
525
00:35:23,922 --> 00:35:25,391
- I tried it.
526
00:35:25,424 --> 00:35:28,527
- [Maya] What's heroin like?
527
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:31,563
- Well it's not like 600
orgasms or whatever people say.
528
00:35:31,597 --> 00:35:33,232
It was pleasant.
529
00:35:33,265 --> 00:35:36,335
I vomited a little
and fell asleep.
530
00:35:36,368 --> 00:35:38,337
- I have no interest in heroin,
531
00:35:38,370 --> 00:35:40,472
but I wonder if your
description of the drug
532
00:35:40,506 --> 00:35:44,176
says more about you
than about the drug.
533
00:35:45,744 --> 00:35:47,246
- Yeah, maybe.
534
00:35:55,587 --> 00:35:59,358
- Would you describe
yourself as a sensual person?
535
00:35:59,391 --> 00:36:01,827
- I would describe
myself as cunning.
536
00:36:01,860 --> 00:36:03,962
- [Maya] Mm.
537
00:36:03,995 --> 00:36:06,365
- Yeah, my brain is
fast enough to fake
538
00:36:06,398 --> 00:36:08,467
its way through any
sensual experience.
539
00:36:08,500 --> 00:36:11,570
And then, you know,
what's the difference?
540
00:36:11,603 --> 00:36:16,842
- The difference between
sensuality and fake sensuality?
541
00:36:16,875 --> 00:36:18,777
There's a tremendous difference.
542
00:36:18,810 --> 00:36:21,847
- Yeah, maybe, I'm
skeptical though.
543
00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:24,350
Like I can work
myself into a hell
544
00:36:24,383 --> 00:36:26,552
of a metaphysical
mood if I need to.
545
00:36:26,585 --> 00:36:29,455
Meanwhile, I have
friends who feel so much,
546
00:36:29,488 --> 00:36:34,560
who couldn't live their lives
without wine and amazing sex.
547
00:36:34,593 --> 00:36:36,328
They're miserable people.
548
00:36:36,362 --> 00:36:37,863
- They should kill themselves.
549
00:36:37,896 --> 00:36:39,698
- Yeah, except apparently
not one of them
550
00:36:39,731 --> 00:36:42,301
has written anything
good enough to justify--
551
00:36:42,334 --> 00:36:44,870
- You understood me then, what
I was saying a minute ago.
552
00:36:44,903 --> 00:36:46,572
You understand I'm
never being glib.
553
00:36:46,605 --> 00:36:47,806
- Yeah, yeah, I understood you.
554
00:36:47,839 --> 00:36:49,575
I get everything the first time.
555
00:36:49,608 --> 00:36:51,577
- Mm.
556
00:36:51,610 --> 00:36:53,579
- You don't have to play these
cat and mouse games with me,
557
00:36:53,612 --> 00:36:55,714
I mean you can, if you want
to, but you don't have to.
558
00:36:57,616 --> 00:37:00,586
- What am I up to, then?
559
00:37:00,619 --> 00:37:02,554
- Sure, I get why
you're doing this.
560
00:37:02,588 --> 00:37:04,523
- [Maya] Hm.
561
00:37:04,556 --> 00:37:07,559
- Well you've got some terminal
disease and you probably
562
00:37:07,593 --> 00:37:09,595
like what you wrote 20
years ago but you don't like
563
00:37:09,628 --> 00:37:14,466
what you're writing now, and
probably other people agree.
564
00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:16,502
- [Maya] Hm.
565
00:37:16,535 --> 00:37:18,504
- And so you figure if you go
off and pull a Foster Wallace,
566
00:37:18,537 --> 00:37:21,573
you'll be doing your
good books a favor.
567
00:37:21,607 --> 00:37:25,311
And good books need all the
help they can get these days,
568
00:37:25,344 --> 00:37:27,479
especially when
they're competing with
569
00:37:27,513 --> 00:37:32,651
bad books like mine, you know
my agent's still pushing.
570
00:37:32,684 --> 00:37:35,454
It probably will happen, too.
571
00:37:37,523 --> 00:37:41,026
Well it's too bad for everyone.
572
00:37:41,059 --> 00:37:42,828
Cause my book will
take up space.
573
00:37:42,861 --> 00:37:44,396
A few thousand
people will read it
574
00:37:44,430 --> 00:37:46,598
and there are 10,000 of me.
575
00:37:46,632 --> 00:37:49,401
Yeah, so, I get it.
576
00:37:49,435 --> 00:37:53,472
Good writing is not
good enough anymore.
577
00:37:53,505 --> 00:37:57,409
You have to kill
yourself, or someone else.
578
00:37:57,443 --> 00:38:00,579
- [Maya] Are you a
closet right-winger?
579
00:38:00,612 --> 00:38:02,548
- Well I wouldn't mind
selling this place
580
00:38:02,581 --> 00:38:06,718
and dividing the money between
myself and nine friends.
581
00:38:06,752 --> 00:38:08,587
- If I decide you're
right for this,
582
00:38:08,620 --> 00:38:11,390
I don't care what you
do with the property,
583
00:38:11,423 --> 00:38:15,594
but what about your politics,
especially regarding women?
584
00:38:17,963 --> 00:38:19,898
- Women.
585
00:38:19,931 --> 00:38:22,434
- [Maya] Yes, I know. But
if I'm going to trust you
586
00:38:22,468 --> 00:38:27,005
with my afterlife, I need
to know that you believe
587
00:38:27,038 --> 00:38:31,610
in the very real mental
existence of women.
588
00:38:31,643 --> 00:38:34,613
- Do I look skeptical of
your mental existence?
589
00:38:34,646 --> 00:38:36,615
- [Maya] Uh, yeah.
590
00:38:36,648 --> 00:38:40,386
- No no no, that's bullshit,
I don't have that problem.
591
00:38:40,419 --> 00:38:43,355
I don't have alienation issues.
592
00:38:43,389 --> 00:38:45,591
- Possibly that's
why you describe
593
00:38:45,624 --> 00:38:47,559
your own book as not very good.
594
00:38:47,593 --> 00:38:49,661
- No, come on.
595
00:38:49,695 --> 00:38:52,398
What do I have to do to prove
to you that I'm not an idiot?
596
00:38:57,102 --> 00:39:00,572
- You're done, you're
done, you're done.
597
00:39:00,606 --> 00:39:03,575
[Maya sighs]
598
00:39:03,609 --> 00:39:07,646
Oh no, not on the menu, not
on the menu, absolutely not!
599
00:39:07,679 --> 00:39:10,749
No, no!
600
00:39:10,782 --> 00:39:13,552
[Maya laughs]
601
00:39:16,888 --> 00:39:18,890
[Maya laughs shrilly]
602
00:39:18,924 --> 00:39:21,560
Ah! [laughs]
603
00:39:24,630 --> 00:39:26,732
[Maya groans]
604
00:39:26,765 --> 00:39:27,733
Ah!
605
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:31,503
[Maya laughs]
606
00:39:34,973 --> 00:39:36,575
I'm going to kill you!
607
00:39:36,608 --> 00:39:39,144
I'm gonna, I'm gonna kill you!
608
00:39:39,177 --> 00:39:43,515
I'm going to kill you! [laughs]
609
00:39:46,618 --> 00:39:49,855
[both breath heavily]
610
00:39:59,831 --> 00:40:03,502
[Maya breathes heavily]
611
00:40:10,642 --> 00:40:12,544
I understand.
612
00:40:12,578 --> 00:40:14,613
You had to fuck me to prove--
613
00:40:14,646 --> 00:40:16,214
- It's no big
deal, I always fuck
614
00:40:16,247 --> 00:40:18,917
a woman after I go down on her.
615
00:40:22,087 --> 00:40:24,890
What should we do now?
616
00:40:24,923 --> 00:40:30,161
- Now we watch you get
off my land, you're out.
617
00:40:30,195 --> 00:40:33,599
You can't be my executor.
618
00:40:33,632 --> 00:40:35,200
- Do you have any alcohol?
619
00:40:35,233 --> 00:40:37,569
I'd really like a drink.
620
00:40:43,742 --> 00:40:46,612
- It's all over the kitchen.
621
00:40:46,645 --> 00:40:49,915
Go make me a drink,
you little bitch.
622
00:41:17,643 --> 00:41:20,612
[ice cubes clink]
623
00:41:21,747 --> 00:41:24,215
[liquid sloshes]
624
00:41:51,276 --> 00:41:53,278
You know, I know
at least 10 women
625
00:41:53,311 --> 00:41:56,615
who'd call what
you just did rape.
626
00:42:00,652 --> 00:42:05,156
- I'm glad you aren't
one of those 10 women.
627
00:42:09,127 --> 00:42:10,996
- What are you
reading right now?
628
00:42:14,265 --> 00:42:17,002
- You know not much, actually.
629
00:42:18,937 --> 00:42:22,641
I find myself without a
lot of patience in my 30s.
630
00:42:22,674 --> 00:42:24,910
You know, it's weird.
631
00:42:24,943 --> 00:42:27,979
You'd think I'd
have more patience.
632
00:42:33,084 --> 00:42:35,687
- You're uglier than
I first realized.
633
00:42:35,721 --> 00:42:38,256
- Yeah, well my phone
and my computer have
634
00:42:38,289 --> 00:42:42,027
killed off my ability to
be beautiful and read.
635
00:42:42,060 --> 00:42:44,863
I read the whole mess in my 20s.
636
00:42:46,665 --> 00:42:50,135
That was the end of reading.
637
00:42:50,168 --> 00:42:54,072
Now I just write and
skim and write and skim.
638
00:42:56,775 --> 00:42:59,244
I read your novel in my 20s.
639
00:43:00,912 --> 00:43:04,282
I haven't read your poetry.
640
00:43:04,315 --> 00:43:08,654
- You should, you might
learn some fucking grace.
641
00:43:08,687 --> 00:43:11,256
The three books
I wrote in my 30s.
642
00:43:11,289 --> 00:43:15,894
Those are what
sycophants call genius.
643
00:43:15,927 --> 00:43:17,595
One, two, three.
644
00:43:20,298 --> 00:43:23,802
Like little neutron stars.
645
00:43:23,835 --> 00:43:28,173
- So your own mind managed
to impress you, yeah?
646
00:43:29,675 --> 00:43:32,043
- Not now, the light's gone out.
647
00:43:37,949 --> 00:43:41,619
But in my 30s, yes,
my mind was very good.
648
00:43:42,921 --> 00:43:45,190
I felt it, then, I loved it.
649
00:43:48,694 --> 00:43:56,001
It was like a set of
strings, all intertwined.
650
00:43:56,034 --> 00:44:00,438
But not tangled, not
tangled like necklaces.
651
00:44:00,471 --> 00:44:05,210
But like a 10 or 11
652
00:44:05,243 --> 00:44:08,179
dimensional hammered dulcimer.
653
00:44:13,151 --> 00:44:16,287
Then in my 30s.
654
00:44:18,223 --> 00:44:21,126
- I'll, I'll make you a deal.
655
00:44:24,295 --> 00:44:27,098
You make me your
heir and executor,
656
00:44:27,132 --> 00:44:30,468
and I'll read all your books
and write a hagiography
657
00:44:30,501 --> 00:44:33,271
of you and spend my
30s telling everyone
658
00:44:33,304 --> 00:44:37,275
how beautiful a
dulcimer you were.
659
00:44:37,308 --> 00:44:41,112
- You can't be my executor,
you're out, I told you already.
660
00:44:41,146 --> 00:44:42,147
- Yeah?
661
00:44:44,950 --> 00:44:46,484
- Out.
662
00:44:46,517 --> 00:44:47,452
Out.
663
00:44:49,520 --> 00:44:52,758
- Let me finish my drink.
664
00:44:52,791 --> 00:44:57,295
- Yeah, you can finish your
drink, that's the law, you know.
665
00:44:59,264 --> 00:45:04,202
The laws of hospitality
are older than poetry even.
666
00:45:09,407 --> 00:45:10,375
Cheers.
667
00:45:17,816 --> 00:45:22,120
- So um, when could I come back?
668
00:45:26,792 --> 00:45:29,194
- Let me check my calendar.
669
00:45:38,436 --> 00:45:39,938
- I uh,
670
00:45:41,506 --> 00:45:44,442
I play the violin, you know.
671
00:45:49,247 --> 00:45:52,417
- Next week, next Thursday.
672
00:45:52,450 --> 00:45:54,285
[gunshots pop]
673
00:45:54,319 --> 00:45:57,789
That's the neighbor, nothing.
674
00:45:57,823 --> 00:45:59,490
- I'm not free on Thursdays.
675
00:45:59,524 --> 00:46:03,461
I wait tables, I'm
a fucking plebe.
676
00:46:03,494 --> 00:46:07,799
- You're free on Thursdays
if you want to come back.
677
00:46:07,833 --> 00:46:11,302
- Okay, see you next Thursday.
678
00:46:23,581 --> 00:46:26,417
- Tomfiddlery, clusterfuckery.
679
00:46:31,222 --> 00:46:34,325
Clusterfuck I'm going where,
680
00:46:34,359 --> 00:46:36,928
I don't know, I don't care.
681
00:46:39,130 --> 00:46:40,798
Clusterfuck.
682
00:46:42,533 --> 00:46:46,504
- [Woman] You don't even
live near other people.
683
00:46:46,537 --> 00:46:49,875
- I live near you
and all your junk.
684
00:46:53,311 --> 00:47:00,118
If I, I'd start over,
I'd go live in Istanbul.
685
00:47:01,552 --> 00:47:04,322
Maybe paint some crazy shit.
686
00:47:06,524 --> 00:47:09,995
Isn't that awful
when a writer says,
687
00:47:12,530 --> 00:47:15,133
maybe I'll take up painting?
688
00:47:16,401 --> 00:47:20,271
- You're just fucked up, Maya.
689
00:47:20,305 --> 00:47:23,474
You're behaving like
a lonely person.
690
00:47:25,376 --> 00:47:28,980
You need to drop acid
and make new friends.
691
00:47:29,014 --> 00:47:31,082
Why don't you go to Burning Man?
692
00:47:31,116 --> 00:47:33,484
- A person can live
right on the Bosphorus.
693
00:47:33,518 --> 00:47:36,254
It's still kind of
cheap there, you know.
694
00:47:36,287 --> 00:47:40,325
With my grapes and my
land and what it's worth.
695
00:47:44,295 --> 00:47:46,331
Even nicer places
along the water
696
00:47:46,364 --> 00:47:49,300
on the Asian side, for decades.
697
00:47:51,536 --> 00:47:56,141
Unless Turkey blows up in civil
war by the end of the year.
698
00:47:59,110 --> 00:48:01,646
[woman coughs]
699
00:48:16,361 --> 00:48:19,097
- Do you miss Ismail?
700
00:48:27,672 --> 00:48:29,574
What happened to your pact?
701
00:48:31,542 --> 00:48:33,211
- [Maya] What pact?
702
00:48:33,244 --> 00:48:34,512
- [Woman] The one
where you get back
703
00:48:34,545 --> 00:48:36,514
together when he turned 60.
704
00:48:38,583 --> 00:48:40,485
- You remember that?
705
00:48:41,652 --> 00:48:43,321
Hm.
706
00:48:43,354 --> 00:48:45,490
Pacts are for pachyderms.
707
00:48:53,464 --> 00:48:55,700
[Maya sniffs]
708
00:49:00,371 --> 00:49:04,275
You smell pretty
good for someone who
709
00:49:04,309 --> 00:49:07,645
- Outdoor showers get you just
as clean as indoor. [sighs]
710
00:49:14,019 --> 00:49:17,022
It's okay to admit
when you miss someone.
711
00:49:19,624 --> 00:49:21,592
- I don't miss Ismail.
712
00:49:24,562 --> 00:49:26,564
I do miss Turkish men, though.
713
00:49:29,567 --> 00:49:32,337
I'd like to meet
another Turkish man.
714
00:49:47,585 --> 00:49:50,055
[woman exhales]
715
00:49:58,529 --> 00:50:01,232
Look, at our age
one can either live
716
00:50:01,266 --> 00:50:03,534
in a healthy state of denial
717
00:50:07,605 --> 00:50:10,675
or an unhealthy
state of mortality.
718
00:50:12,710 --> 00:50:17,348
I live in the mortality,
and so, you know, for me,
719
00:50:17,382 --> 00:50:22,687
everything is starting to
have this ghostly profundity,
720
00:50:25,556 --> 00:50:29,527
exactly because nothing
is, in fact, profound.
721
00:50:31,596 --> 00:50:33,731
And there are no ghosts.
722
00:50:40,405 --> 00:50:43,474
And because I have
no one at all.
723
00:50:51,316 --> 00:50:55,686
The only thing
that matters to me
724
00:50:55,720 --> 00:50:58,523
are the books I wrote years ago.
725
00:51:00,125 --> 00:51:02,427
That's it, that's it.
726
00:51:04,395 --> 00:51:06,531
That's all I care about.
727
00:51:15,573 --> 00:51:18,576
[haunting piano music]
728
00:51:43,868 --> 00:51:45,603
- What is this?
729
00:51:45,636 --> 00:51:48,139
- [Maya] My boat.
730
00:51:48,173 --> 00:51:52,143
All this junk was here
when I bought the land.
731
00:51:53,644 --> 00:51:56,547
- [Man] I like your
boat very much.
732
00:52:07,625 --> 00:52:14,299
- You know there's another
boy, man, whatever you all are.
733
00:52:14,332 --> 00:52:18,403
His writing is not
as good as yours.
734
00:52:18,436 --> 00:52:20,638
But there is competition.
735
00:52:22,773 --> 00:52:23,741
Paul.
736
00:52:26,811 --> 00:52:29,580
He's not like you at all.
737
00:52:29,614 --> 00:52:31,549
He's not a mama's boy.
738
00:52:32,850 --> 00:52:35,520
Would you like to meet him?
739
00:52:35,553 --> 00:52:37,322
- [Man] Meet him here?
740
00:52:38,523 --> 00:52:40,558
- Yeah, at my house.
741
00:52:40,591 --> 00:52:42,493
He comes twice a week.
742
00:52:42,527 --> 00:52:43,728
- [Man] No.
743
00:52:43,761 --> 00:52:45,930
I mean, um, no, I'd prefer not.
744
00:52:47,698 --> 00:52:50,635
- [Maya] That might
just be too bad.
745
00:53:11,756 --> 00:53:13,858
- Are you angry at me?
746
00:53:13,891 --> 00:53:15,226
- [Maya] No.
747
00:53:29,740 --> 00:53:33,010
- I'm not obsessed
with my mother.
748
00:53:33,043 --> 00:53:35,780
I don't live in Texas
because of my mother.
749
00:53:35,813 --> 00:53:37,715
- [Maya] Oh, no?
750
00:53:37,748 --> 00:53:42,587
- No, my mother was
terrible, when I was little.
751
00:53:42,620 --> 00:53:46,557
- Oh yeah, what terrible
things did she do?
752
00:53:48,359 --> 00:53:50,761
- [Man] She slept with men.
753
00:53:52,863 --> 00:53:56,000
- That sounds just awful.
754
00:53:56,033 --> 00:53:57,802
- [Man] Hundreds of them.
755
00:53:57,835 --> 00:53:59,904
- Was she a prostitute?
756
00:54:01,639 --> 00:54:02,673
Was she?
757
00:54:02,707 --> 00:54:05,910
- No.
758
00:54:05,943 --> 00:54:10,448
- Well, I can't have a man
taking over my posthumous rep
759
00:54:10,481 --> 00:54:14,385
if he doesn't like mean
old libidinous women.
760
00:54:14,419 --> 00:54:20,591
- My mother wasn't mean or old
761
00:54:20,625 --> 00:54:22,493
or even so libidinous.
762
00:54:22,527 --> 00:54:26,897
She just, she was a person
with terrible values.
763
00:54:29,634 --> 00:54:35,506
She wanted to be a news
anchor on television.
764
00:54:35,540 --> 00:54:37,408
- [Maya] And?
765
00:54:37,442 --> 00:54:42,012
- And she tried and
tried, and nobody gave
766
00:54:42,046 --> 00:54:45,049
her what she wanted,
but they just kept
767
00:54:45,082 --> 00:54:49,754
teasing her and
having sex with her.
768
00:54:51,489 --> 00:54:54,425
And they were all
horrible people.
769
00:54:57,395 --> 00:55:00,998
- And now you're into
poetry and porcelain.
770
00:55:04,635 --> 00:55:06,070
Poor little flower.
771
00:55:09,407 --> 00:55:11,576
I don't feel bad for you.
772
00:55:17,147 --> 00:55:18,783
It's getting dark.
773
00:55:20,050 --> 00:55:22,019
Go back to your hotel.
774
00:55:29,960 --> 00:55:33,764
Uh, maybe not idiotic,
mediocre is the word.
775
00:55:35,566 --> 00:55:41,038
His, um, soft-core
dialogue he writes,
776
00:55:41,071 --> 00:55:45,476
this pseudo-red-light-district
shit.
777
00:55:47,478 --> 00:55:50,615
I don't like books
by men like that.
778
00:55:52,617 --> 00:55:54,885
- [Paul] Yeah, well,
you're missing out.
779
00:56:00,425 --> 00:56:03,628
[haunting piano music]
780
00:56:42,467 --> 00:56:47,705
- [Maya] Hello, Ismail,
how's the weather in my head?
781
00:56:49,073 --> 00:56:51,776
How's the weather in Byzantium?
782
00:56:53,678 --> 00:56:55,613
You old Trojan rooster.
783
00:57:05,189 --> 00:57:06,657
- I don't want to
hear the criticism.
784
00:57:06,691 --> 00:57:08,158
- [Maya] That was luck.
785
00:57:08,192 --> 00:57:09,226
- We can just let
silence continue.
786
00:57:09,259 --> 00:57:10,661
- Just read it, Ansel.
787
00:57:15,700 --> 00:57:19,870
I think I've had some water
in my ear for a few weeks.
788
00:57:22,006 --> 00:57:23,741
Read it to me.
789
00:57:23,774 --> 00:57:28,679
- Fell when the wax
melted, fell in through
790
00:57:28,713 --> 00:57:32,517
an aneurysm in a thought
of wall into a grand
791
00:57:32,550 --> 00:57:36,654
reception hall like in
an 18th century hotel.
792
00:57:36,687 --> 00:57:40,591
And there stood you in
schism-blue eyeflooding
793
00:57:40,625 --> 00:57:46,631
floor length gown, and all your
books and things around you,
794
00:57:46,664 --> 00:57:50,067
you had given them
them to wingless me,
795
00:57:51,569 --> 00:57:53,904
who wrote this note to you.
796
00:57:55,806 --> 00:57:59,176
It said, don't hurt yourself.
797
00:57:59,209 --> 00:58:02,513
I'm asking you, it said,
798
00:58:02,547 --> 00:58:07,552
it said I fell in through
a rip in the paper.
799
00:58:18,262 --> 00:58:22,166
- You're a sweet boy,
Ansel, thank you.
800
00:58:25,269 --> 00:58:28,272
One almost imagines you're
the kind of reactionary
801
00:58:28,305 --> 00:58:30,641
who writes because
he felt something,
802
00:58:30,675 --> 00:58:32,810
and not just because he
wants to be published.
803
00:58:35,613 --> 00:58:37,648
There might be an unpublished
804
00:58:37,682 --> 00:58:39,884
novel here somewhere
on the property.
805
00:58:42,352 --> 00:58:45,222
Given the corporate
takeover of publishing,
806
00:58:45,255 --> 00:58:50,661
I think a Maya Dardel novel's
807
00:58:50,695 --> 00:58:56,233
worth an advance of maybe
$100,000 if I'm living,
808
00:58:56,266 --> 00:59:00,070
but I think a million
maybe if I'm dead.
809
00:59:00,104 --> 00:59:03,674
- That's not why I'm here.
810
00:59:03,708 --> 00:59:05,810
- [Maya] Did I hurt
your feelings again?
811
00:59:08,345 --> 00:59:10,881
Why are you here, dear boy?
812
00:59:18,355 --> 00:59:21,859
- Because it, it
shouldn't be anyone else,
813
00:59:21,892 --> 00:59:23,761
if you have to do it.
814
00:59:25,696 --> 00:59:26,731
- [Maya] Why?
815
00:59:29,634 --> 00:59:33,671
- Because I
understand your work.
816
00:59:33,704 --> 00:59:41,311
I understand it, I can read
it in its six or seven layers
817
00:59:41,345 --> 00:59:45,883
or matrices or whatever
you think of them as.
818
00:59:45,916 --> 00:59:48,385
- [Maya] Them?
819
00:59:48,418 --> 00:59:53,691
- The layers, the combining
and harmonic themes
820
00:59:53,724 --> 00:59:57,995
and sounds and senses, and you
know what I'm talking about.
821
01:00:00,130 --> 01:00:02,232
- [Maya] You're making
poetry sound like
822
01:00:02,266 --> 01:00:05,069
some rare form of luminous math.
823
01:00:06,737 --> 01:00:09,640
- [Ansel] Well,
isn't it, kind of?
824
01:00:11,108 --> 01:00:13,043
- [Maya] Maybe it is.
825
01:00:13,077 --> 01:00:18,683
You know this poem, despite
that it's written to me,
826
01:00:18,716 --> 01:00:21,686
is really quite impressive.
827
01:00:21,719 --> 01:00:26,691
Um, but there are some
risks in it, though, right?
828
01:00:26,724 --> 01:00:28,358
- [Ansel] What risks?
829
01:00:28,392 --> 01:00:32,096
- Well, schism-blue for example.
830
01:00:34,164 --> 01:00:36,934
It's interesting to
imagine the shade
831
01:00:36,967 --> 01:00:39,870
of blue that is
the schism shade.
832
01:00:42,773 --> 01:00:46,176
The blue of divorce,
of mental breakdown,
833
01:00:46,210 --> 01:00:48,145
of civil war uniforms.
834
01:00:49,446 --> 01:00:51,882
Yeah, yes, and it's interesting
835
01:00:51,916 --> 01:00:54,284
to imagine in the
other direction,
836
01:00:54,318 --> 01:00:57,654
a schism that is
um, blue in quality.
837
01:00:59,857 --> 01:01:02,426
But there's a certain
838
01:01:02,459 --> 01:01:07,297
fetishism in just
plunking it in the poem.
839
01:01:07,331 --> 01:01:11,335
Um, it, uh, it shows
your hand a little.
840
01:01:11,368 --> 01:01:13,303
- I don't mind showing my hand.
841
01:01:13,337 --> 01:01:15,072
- [Maya] Well, you should.
842
01:01:15,105 --> 01:01:17,007
- Plus it rhymes, plus
it adds to the Icarus
843
01:01:17,041 --> 01:01:20,310
theme so that's four
uh, layers there and--
844
01:01:20,344 --> 01:01:22,312
- Yes, your poetry is layered.
845
01:01:22,346 --> 01:01:24,715
As I said, it's
impressive, more impressive
846
01:01:24,749 --> 01:01:29,386
than my way of talking
about it probably implies.
847
01:01:29,419 --> 01:01:32,322
But that's not the point.
848
01:01:32,356 --> 01:01:37,327
Your schism-blue is
a little too obviously
849
01:01:37,361 --> 01:01:40,497
infatuated with its
own layered prettiness.
850
01:01:40,530 --> 01:01:46,203
- Oh well, that only
matters right now, I mean,
851
01:01:48,472 --> 01:01:55,512
when I'm dead, if people
read my books, they'll,
852
01:01:55,545 --> 01:01:59,316
if people read books when
I'm dead, they'll um,
853
01:01:59,349 --> 01:02:01,518
think of my schism-blue
eye flooding floor
854
01:02:01,551 --> 01:02:08,893
the way they look at Joyce's
smoke blue mobile eyes.
855
01:02:10,828 --> 01:02:17,101
Or Hart Crane's rip-tooth
of the sky's acetylene.
856
01:02:19,837 --> 01:02:27,311
- Sure, sure, death beautifies
even the ugliest vanity.
857
01:02:27,344 --> 01:02:32,182
Ever looked at photographs
of contemporary authors,
858
01:02:32,216 --> 01:02:35,385
pompous, and have you
ever thought about
859
01:02:35,419 --> 01:02:38,789
how romantic they will
seem in 100 years?
860
01:02:38,823 --> 01:02:41,491
[gunshots pop]
861
01:02:44,561 --> 01:02:49,133
We're soon to be
extinct, I think.
862
01:02:49,166 --> 01:02:51,902
We're like the dodos
and the aristocrats.
863
01:02:51,936 --> 01:02:55,505
[haunting piano music]
864
01:03:25,235 --> 01:03:27,071
So this is my surprise?
865
01:03:27,104 --> 01:03:28,906
Very impressive.
866
01:03:31,575 --> 01:03:34,511
[Maya chuckles]
867
01:04:01,638 --> 01:04:04,174
I don't eat mushrooms
from my driveway.
868
01:04:04,208 --> 01:04:06,176
- Why not?
869
01:04:06,210 --> 01:04:09,279
If I'm wrong, and there's
only a 1% chance that I am,
870
01:04:09,313 --> 01:04:13,517
then um, the worst thing that'll
happen is that we'll die.
871
01:04:15,119 --> 01:04:16,954
You want that.
872
01:04:16,987 --> 01:04:20,057
- Yeah, but Ansel, I
don't want to die in pain,
873
01:04:20,090 --> 01:04:23,360
covered with my own
vomit and yours.
874
01:04:23,393 --> 01:04:25,629
- These are chanterelles.
875
01:04:27,397 --> 01:04:30,367
I'd like to make you an omelet.
876
01:04:30,400 --> 01:04:34,371
Do you have any um, any
interesting cheeses?
877
01:04:38,208 --> 01:04:39,143
Hm.
878
01:04:43,613 --> 01:04:44,548
Garlic?
879
01:04:46,416 --> 01:04:49,386
- I have some strange
Israeli frozen garlic.
880
01:04:49,419 --> 01:04:51,521
Um, it's really from,
it's probably actually
881
01:04:51,555 --> 01:04:56,326
from China and covered
with pulverized horse.
882
01:04:56,360 --> 01:04:58,929
I'm gonna put this
for 30 minutes.
883
01:04:58,963 --> 01:05:01,065
[timer ticks]
884
01:05:01,098 --> 01:05:05,702
If we're alive when it
goes off, hurrah for us.
885
01:05:05,735 --> 01:05:09,339
[haunting piano music]
886
01:05:36,633 --> 01:05:40,204
Tell me more about
this harlot mother.
887
01:05:40,237 --> 01:05:41,638
- [Ansel] Mine?
888
01:05:41,671 --> 01:05:44,541
- Yes, yours.
889
01:05:44,574 --> 01:05:48,612
Mine was a simpleton
with no desires.
890
01:05:48,645 --> 01:05:54,084
I'm interested in ambitious
women, even shallow ones.
891
01:05:54,118 --> 01:05:56,553
- My mother's never honest.
892
01:05:56,586 --> 01:05:58,755
She plays games.
893
01:05:58,788 --> 01:06:01,725
- Give me an example.
894
01:06:01,758 --> 01:06:03,593
- I don't know,
she doesn't realize
895
01:06:03,627 --> 01:06:05,562
she's playing mind games.
896
01:06:05,595 --> 01:06:08,265
And then I'm forced
to play them with her.
897
01:06:08,298 --> 01:06:11,368
- [Maya] Like you're
forced to play with me?
898
01:06:11,401 --> 01:06:15,572
- No, you're very aware
of the games you play.
899
01:06:15,605 --> 01:06:17,074
- Is she my age?
900
01:06:17,107 --> 01:06:19,376
- [Ansel] Slightly older.
901
01:06:19,409 --> 01:06:21,311
- How does she mindfuck you?
902
01:06:21,345 --> 01:06:22,679
Give me examples.
903
01:06:25,582 --> 01:06:28,385
- She claimed that she
didn't get any sleep
904
01:06:28,418 --> 01:06:31,455
at all because
she had this dream
905
01:06:31,488 --> 01:06:35,559
that she and my sister
and I were all at some--
906
01:06:35,592 --> 01:06:36,760
- You have a sister?
907
01:06:36,793 --> 01:06:38,662
- [Ansel] Zoe, yes.
908
01:06:38,695 --> 01:06:40,730
- Mm.
909
01:06:40,764 --> 01:06:44,568
- And in this dream that
she claims that she had,
910
01:06:44,601 --> 01:06:49,339
Karl, my father's brother,
knocked me over the head with
911
01:06:49,373 --> 01:06:52,576
a microphone stand and told
me that my father wasn't my
912
01:06:52,609 --> 01:06:57,214
real father, but that my father
was my sister's real father.
913
01:06:57,247 --> 01:06:58,582
- [Maya] Zoe's older?
914
01:06:58,615 --> 01:07:00,150
- She's younger.
915
01:07:02,252 --> 01:07:06,390
Anyway she called me to
tell me she dreamed that.
916
01:07:06,423 --> 01:07:08,625
- [Maya] What did you say?
917
01:07:11,628 --> 01:07:16,066
- I said I don't know if I find
people's dreams interesting,
918
01:07:16,100 --> 01:07:18,602
but I certainly find
people's interest
919
01:07:18,635 --> 01:07:20,570
in their own dreams interesting.
920
01:07:20,604 --> 01:07:22,306
- [Maya] Mm.
921
01:07:22,339 --> 01:07:24,408
Do you think you're
your father's son?
922
01:07:24,441 --> 01:07:28,645
- I do, I think my mother had
a bad dream and couldn't help
923
01:07:28,678 --> 01:07:34,384
but jab me with it, just to
put a little needle in me.
924
01:07:34,418 --> 01:07:37,787
- [Maya] Hm, maybe
she wanted attention.
925
01:07:40,424 --> 01:07:42,526
- She always wants attention.
926
01:07:42,559 --> 01:07:46,130
- [Maya] Were you
nice to her about it?
927
01:07:49,633 --> 01:07:51,601
- I was nice, I guess.
928
01:07:51,635 --> 01:07:52,569
- Mm.
929
01:08:01,411 --> 01:08:03,113
We have 15 minutes.
930
01:08:05,682 --> 01:08:07,684
'Til the toxin takes effect.
931
01:08:09,419 --> 01:08:11,388
Do you know the first signs
932
01:08:11,421 --> 01:08:15,091
of mushroom poisoning
in a pregnant woman?
933
01:08:17,627 --> 01:08:19,663
Her breasts shoot milk.
934
01:08:22,466 --> 01:08:26,603
I read this in a novel,
so it must be true.
935
01:08:26,636 --> 01:08:28,572
Your body confuses the toxin
936
01:08:28,605 --> 01:08:31,575
arresting your
system for a baby.
937
01:08:33,377 --> 01:08:34,578
I like that.
938
01:08:40,550 --> 01:08:43,687
Ever heard of ovarian
insufficiency?
939
01:08:46,456 --> 01:08:49,259
There's material for a bad poet.
940
01:08:55,432 --> 01:08:57,334
Hm, go get the phone.
941
01:09:01,505 --> 01:09:03,407
I'd ask you to use your own
942
01:09:03,440 --> 01:09:06,476
but reception is
so weak up here.
943
01:09:09,213 --> 01:09:11,748
- [Ansel] Who are you calling?
944
01:09:11,781 --> 01:09:13,850
- [Maya] Your mother, of course.
945
01:09:13,883 --> 01:09:15,819
- [Ansel] What, why?
946
01:09:15,852 --> 01:09:18,422
- In these last minutes of
your life, it's important
947
01:09:18,455 --> 01:09:22,559
to tell those close to you what
you really think about them.
948
01:09:22,592 --> 01:09:24,261
Go ahead.
949
01:09:26,530 --> 01:09:28,665
Tell your mother
what you told me,
950
01:09:28,698 --> 01:09:32,702
that she's unsophisticated
and manipulative.
951
01:09:35,672 --> 01:09:38,442
You want my estate, don't you?
952
01:09:38,475 --> 01:09:40,444
- Yes, just stop asking that.
953
01:09:40,477 --> 01:09:42,812
- [Maya] How much
do you want it?
954
01:09:42,846 --> 01:09:45,649
[Ansel sighs]
955
01:09:45,682 --> 01:09:47,217
- I think...
956
01:09:50,654 --> 01:09:52,822
I could live here with
957
01:09:52,856 --> 01:09:54,824
and take care of you,
958
01:09:54,858 --> 01:09:58,428
whether you were dead or alive.
959
01:09:58,462 --> 01:10:01,398
- [Maya] Go ahead,
take care of me.
960
01:10:01,431 --> 01:10:05,602
Show me you'll do perverse
things out of loyalty to me.
961
01:10:14,644 --> 01:10:16,413
We don't have all day.
962
01:10:26,723 --> 01:10:29,559
[phone beeps]
963
01:10:30,727 --> 01:10:32,429
- I made a mistake.
964
01:10:38,034 --> 01:10:40,670
[phone rings]
965
01:10:42,672 --> 01:10:43,973
I don't think she's gonna--
966
01:10:44,007 --> 01:10:46,576
- [Ansel's Mother] Hello?
967
01:10:46,610 --> 01:10:48,378
- Hi.
968
01:10:48,412 --> 01:10:49,379
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
969
01:10:49,413 --> 01:10:50,980
No, it's me.
970
01:10:51,014 --> 01:10:52,749
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
971
01:10:52,782 --> 01:10:55,452
No, I just wanted to
tell you something.
972
01:10:55,485 --> 01:10:58,888
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
973
01:10:58,922 --> 01:11:01,458
I want to tell you something.
974
01:11:01,491 --> 01:11:04,728
No. No, no, you
don't have a choice.
975
01:11:04,761 --> 01:11:07,697
The city makes you pay them.
976
01:11:07,731 --> 01:11:09,466
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
977
01:11:09,499 --> 01:11:11,067
No, I want to tell
you something.
978
01:11:11,100 --> 01:11:12,936
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
979
01:11:12,969 --> 01:11:14,938
Will you let me speak?
980
01:11:19,075 --> 01:11:21,077
[sighs] You're a solipsist.
981
01:11:21,110 --> 01:11:22,679
- [Ansel's Mother] What?
982
01:11:22,712 --> 01:11:25,048
- A solipsist.
983
01:11:25,081 --> 01:11:30,454
You don't know anything
about anybody but you.
984
01:11:30,487 --> 01:11:33,457
You don't know why
people do things.
985
01:11:33,490 --> 01:11:37,661
No, you think that people either
are against you or obsessed
986
01:11:37,694 --> 01:11:41,465
with you, there's, you don't
really see any grayer areas.
987
01:11:41,498 --> 01:11:43,032
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
988
01:11:43,066 --> 01:11:44,834
No, you don't know
how you're perceived.
989
01:11:44,868 --> 01:11:46,903
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
990
01:11:46,936 --> 01:11:51,441
Please, please
don't cry. [sighs]
991
01:11:53,710 --> 01:11:57,347
- Tell her those news
anchor barbarians,
992
01:11:57,381 --> 01:11:59,483
that they used her for sex.
993
01:11:59,516 --> 01:12:01,485
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
994
01:12:01,518 --> 01:12:04,488
And your sister's
name is Zoe, right?
995
01:12:04,521 --> 01:12:06,690
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligibly on phone]
996
01:12:06,723 --> 01:12:08,658
Tell her Zoe hates her.
997
01:12:10,694 --> 01:12:12,496
[Ansel's Mother speaks
unintelligently on phone]
998
01:12:12,529 --> 01:12:14,498
[phone clicks]
Zoe hates her.
999
01:12:14,531 --> 01:12:16,633
- [Ansel] Zoe hates you.
1000
01:12:20,069 --> 01:12:22,772
She hung up before I said that.
1001
01:12:27,911 --> 01:12:30,614
[timer ticks]
1002
01:12:33,182 --> 01:12:35,619
- Thank you, you did well.
1003
01:12:39,889 --> 01:12:41,625
Go clean your face.
1004
01:12:50,634 --> 01:12:52,869
[Ansel sighs]
1005
01:13:01,711 --> 01:13:04,581
[water sloshes]
1006
01:13:07,684 --> 01:13:10,754
[timer dings]
1007
01:13:10,787 --> 01:13:13,857
[car engine roars]
1008
01:13:16,960 --> 01:13:19,663
Are you really
walking your rat dogs
1009
01:13:19,696 --> 01:13:23,467
or did you come over
here to check on me?
1010
01:13:26,703 --> 01:13:29,138
- Which boy was that?
1011
01:13:29,172 --> 01:13:32,075
- [Maya] That's Paul.
1012
01:13:32,108 --> 01:13:34,578
- [Woman] Hmm, what if
somebody called the cops?
1013
01:13:34,611 --> 01:13:36,680
You ever thought about that?
1014
01:13:36,713 --> 01:13:39,483
Someone called the cops
on me a buncha times.
1015
01:13:39,516 --> 01:13:40,950
- [Maya] The police
already called.
1016
01:13:40,984 --> 01:13:42,686
- [Woman] Oh, yeah?
1017
01:13:42,719 --> 01:13:45,489
- Several weeks ago.
1018
01:13:45,522 --> 01:13:49,125
I told them I was proud of
them for listening to NPR.
1019
01:13:49,158 --> 01:13:55,565
Ah, this social worker
cop, his name's Alfonso.
1020
01:13:55,599 --> 01:13:57,867
Do you like the name Alfonso?
1021
01:13:57,901 --> 01:14:02,606
Could you unsarcastically
fuck a man with that name?
1022
01:14:04,173 --> 01:14:06,843
- I've never sarcastically
fucked anyone.
1023
01:14:06,876 --> 01:14:08,812
That's your department.
1024
01:14:08,845 --> 01:14:10,947
- I told him thanks for your
interest in contemporary
1025
01:14:10,980 --> 01:14:13,650
literature and no, I'm
not a threat to myself
1026
01:14:13,683 --> 01:14:17,987
but merely someone who
enjoys speaking in metaphors.
1027
01:14:21,525 --> 01:14:22,759
- [Woman] [sighs] Oh god.
1028
01:14:22,792 --> 01:14:24,494
Go already, squat.
1029
01:14:24,528 --> 01:14:26,496
- And I told them if
they started listening
1030
01:14:26,530 --> 01:14:28,498
to other interviews with
writers, they would have
1031
01:14:28,532 --> 01:14:33,703
to worry, we're all
threats to our own person.
1032
01:14:33,737 --> 01:14:37,173
You're more of a threat
to others, I'd say.
1033
01:14:37,206 --> 01:14:39,743
- I'm going to drop
acid on Sunday.
1034
01:14:44,280 --> 01:14:46,916
- This is a great idea.
1035
01:14:46,950 --> 01:14:50,253
I need your help with something.
1036
01:14:50,286 --> 01:14:53,723
- [Woman] I'm pretty much
immune to it, these days.
1037
01:15:02,331 --> 01:15:06,703
- I need you to know
that I'm utterly sane.
1038
01:15:06,736 --> 01:15:07,804
Even if I go.
1039
01:15:14,077 --> 01:15:16,045
- [Woman] No, no, no.
1040
01:15:25,354 --> 01:15:30,994
- Yes, dear, it's um,
it's time to sail away.
1041
01:15:33,997 --> 01:15:37,701
- You do, and I'll
piss on your grave.
1042
01:15:37,734 --> 01:15:41,671
- Well, as Ansel says,
I'm a cruel person.
1043
01:15:43,006 --> 01:15:46,309
- [Woman] You better not be.
1044
01:15:46,342 --> 01:15:48,311
- However I'm perfectly sane.
1045
01:15:48,344 --> 01:15:51,648
Whatever I do, I do
out of pure will, okay?
1046
01:15:54,951 --> 01:15:56,152
Not hysteria.
1047
01:16:07,764 --> 01:16:11,167
[haunting piano music]
1048
01:16:53,710 --> 01:16:55,311
- [Ansel] What you
did yesterday was--
1049
01:16:55,344 --> 01:16:57,714
- [Maya] I know, I know.
1050
01:16:59,783 --> 01:17:02,886
- [Ansel] Why did
you make me do that?
1051
01:17:02,919 --> 01:17:04,721
- I, I don't know.
1052
01:17:07,991 --> 01:17:10,727
I get carried away by power.
1053
01:17:10,760 --> 01:17:13,296
I really like it.
1054
01:17:13,329 --> 01:17:17,333
I think maybe I haven't
had enough of it.
1055
01:17:17,366 --> 01:17:22,338
People don't like a woman with
too much power. [chuckles]
1056
01:17:22,371 --> 01:17:24,741
I'd run for president except
1057
01:17:24,774 --> 01:17:29,345
a monstrous woman
isn't sympathetic.
1058
01:17:29,378 --> 01:17:34,250
Monstrous men do get elected,
and I wasn't born here.
1059
01:17:37,186 --> 01:17:39,756
- [Ansel] You should
go back to teaching.
1060
01:17:39,789 --> 01:17:42,826
- Except I don't like
my power so defined,
1061
01:17:42,859 --> 01:17:47,196
institutionally circumscribed,
I like raw power.
1062
01:17:58,307 --> 01:18:00,143
- [Ansel] That
sounds like something
1063
01:18:00,176 --> 01:18:02,345
that someone very
young would say.
1064
01:18:02,378 --> 01:18:05,849
- You're right, of course.
1065
01:18:05,882 --> 01:18:09,753
That's what happens,
whatever I say sounds false.
1066
01:18:09,786 --> 01:18:15,358
Talking about death is a
lot like dividing by zero,
1067
01:18:15,391 --> 01:18:19,863
you know, because it generates
these error messages.
1068
01:18:21,264 --> 01:18:22,766
- [Ansel] I know, my father--
1069
01:18:22,799 --> 01:18:24,734
- And it's not even a romantic
1070
01:18:24,768 --> 01:18:26,770
illusion about
posterity, either.
1071
01:18:26,803 --> 01:18:30,039
It's a sober judgment
of the very meager value
1072
01:18:30,073 --> 01:18:32,809
of my books weighed
against the even
1073
01:18:32,842 --> 01:18:37,213
more obscenely meager
value of my person.
1074
01:18:46,823 --> 01:18:48,758
Toughen up, Ansel.
1075
01:18:48,792 --> 01:18:52,796
The things I do are merely
mildly horrible and cruel.
1076
01:18:52,829 --> 01:18:56,332
I'm actually maybe fond of you.
1077
01:18:56,365 --> 01:18:58,134
And furthermore your mother's
1078
01:18:58,167 --> 01:19:00,436
probably lovely,
sympathetic even.
1079
01:19:00,469 --> 01:19:03,773
You're probably dead
wrong about her.
1080
01:19:03,807 --> 01:19:08,111
Everyone should hear how
miserably misperceived they are.
1081
01:19:09,946 --> 01:19:11,781
Communication would be
less of a clusterfuck
1082
01:19:11,815 --> 01:19:15,952
if everyone knew how much
of a clusterfuck it is.
1083
01:19:20,589 --> 01:19:24,060
[haunting piano music]
1084
01:19:50,619 --> 01:19:53,456
[phone beeps]
1085
01:19:57,593 --> 01:20:00,296
[phone rings]
1086
01:20:04,968 --> 01:20:06,569
- [Ansel] Hello?
1087
01:20:06,602 --> 01:20:08,137
- [Maya] Ansel?
1088
01:20:08,171 --> 01:20:10,006
- [Ansel] Hi.
1089
01:20:10,039 --> 01:20:12,008
- [Maya] You're coming tomorrow.
1090
01:20:12,041 --> 01:20:13,009
- [Ansel] Yes.
1091
01:20:13,042 --> 01:20:14,343
- [Maya] Good.
1092
01:20:15,912 --> 01:20:18,114
I have something for you.
1093
01:20:19,215 --> 01:20:21,951
[metal scraping]
1094
01:20:43,406 --> 01:20:46,542
One can look at it
however many ways.
1095
01:20:48,577 --> 01:20:50,446
One's time alone.
1096
01:20:57,320 --> 01:21:01,424
A succession of
isolated instances,
1097
01:21:01,457 --> 01:21:04,193
or 10 years in a row of 10.
1098
01:21:21,044 --> 01:21:22,578
One 10 year moment,
1099
01:21:25,414 --> 01:21:29,118
or 10,000 ax heads hitting wood,
1100
01:21:29,152 --> 01:21:32,188
or whetstones hitting ax heads,
1101
01:21:32,221 --> 01:21:36,559
or my heart beating
half a billion times.
1102
01:21:43,099 --> 01:21:46,002
Then there's the speed of light.
1103
01:22:27,643 --> 01:22:31,447
- Fuck. [blows on bottle]
1104
01:22:33,382 --> 01:22:36,352
- Fuck. [blows on bottle]
1105
01:22:36,385 --> 01:22:37,553
- [Paul] Fuck. [blows on bottle]
1106
01:22:37,586 --> 01:22:38,621
- Fuck. [blows on bottle]
1107
01:22:38,654 --> 01:22:39,622
[piano key chimes]
1108
01:22:39,655 --> 01:22:41,324
Fuck.
1109
01:22:41,357 --> 01:22:42,625
[Maya blows on bottle]
[piano key chimes]
1110
01:22:42,658 --> 01:22:44,693
Fuck.
[both blow on bottles]
1111
01:22:44,727 --> 01:22:49,632
- I'm saying, no, I'm saying
that everyone is a hypocrite,
1112
01:22:49,665 --> 01:22:53,602
is, you know, especially
someone who says she isn't.
1113
01:22:53,636 --> 01:22:56,405
- [blows on bottle] You
can say whatever you like.
1114
01:22:56,439 --> 01:22:59,408
[blows on bottle] I won't
sit here and argue with you.
1115
01:22:59,442 --> 01:23:02,045
Only uncertain
people have to argue.
1116
01:23:02,078 --> 01:23:05,714
Fuck. [blows on bottle]
1117
01:23:05,748 --> 01:23:07,450
- [Ansel] Hello?
1118
01:23:07,483 --> 01:23:10,153
- Who the fuck is that?
[Maya blows on bottle]
1119
01:23:10,186 --> 01:23:11,220
- Uh.
1120
01:23:11,254 --> 01:23:13,589
[thudding]
1121
01:23:19,495 --> 01:23:21,764
- [Paul] Let me help
you out with that.
1122
01:23:21,797 --> 01:23:23,766
[Ansel sighs]
1123
01:23:23,799 --> 01:23:27,070
No, come on, You're going
to hurt yourself, alright?
1124
01:23:27,103 --> 01:23:28,471
Come on.
1125
01:23:28,504 --> 01:23:31,207
[scoffs] Give me the ax.
1126
01:23:31,240 --> 01:23:33,242
- Okay, okay, okay, okay.
1127
01:23:33,276 --> 01:23:36,779
This is homoerotic and fun,
but let's do something else.
1128
01:23:38,681 --> 01:23:40,549
Let's raise the stakes.
1129
01:23:40,583 --> 01:23:42,418
On your way up
here, did you notice
1130
01:23:42,451 --> 01:23:46,255
a broken green gate four
gates down from mine?
1131
01:23:46,289 --> 01:23:48,157
My wacko neighbor?
1132
01:23:48,191 --> 01:23:50,459
- Is this the guy who
likes to fire off his gun?
1133
01:23:50,493 --> 01:23:52,195
- Exactly.
1134
01:23:52,228 --> 01:23:55,398
Anyway she woke up one morning
1135
01:23:55,431 --> 01:23:58,167
with an erection.
- [Paul] She?
1136
01:23:58,201 --> 01:24:00,169
- [Maya] And claimed
the few feet of land
1137
01:24:00,203 --> 01:24:01,770
right before my gate
belonged to her.
1138
01:24:01,804 --> 01:24:04,607
- This is a woman who
likes to shoot her gun?
1139
01:24:04,640 --> 01:24:06,642
- Yeah, why not?
1140
01:24:06,675 --> 01:24:10,113
The second amendment should
be only for women, actually.
1141
01:24:13,382 --> 01:24:17,653
Anyway, one night she
chainsawed down my mailbox
1142
01:24:17,686 --> 01:24:21,390
to add to her ex-husband's
hoard of junk.
1143
01:24:21,424 --> 01:24:23,459
- Did you call the cops?
1144
01:24:23,492 --> 01:24:27,463
- I was going to take her
to court, but I forgot.
1145
01:24:27,496 --> 01:24:30,699
But now that you're both here
with all this male aggression.
1146
01:24:30,733 --> 01:24:33,736
I'd like you to run
over and get my mailbox.
1147
01:24:35,838 --> 01:24:39,242
Whoever brings the mailbox back
1148
01:24:41,177 --> 01:24:43,246
moves into first place.
1149
01:24:45,448 --> 01:24:47,316
- [Ansel] I don't think it's a,
1150
01:24:47,350 --> 01:24:48,651
I don't think it's a good idea.
1151
01:24:48,684 --> 01:24:50,653
Wait.
1152
01:24:50,686 --> 01:24:53,456
- I'm getting the fucking
box, you go back with Maya.
1153
01:24:53,489 --> 01:24:55,458
- [Ansel] No, I thought
that the best strategy
1154
01:24:55,491 --> 01:24:57,660
would be to have a strategy.
1155
01:24:57,693 --> 01:24:59,495
- [Paul] Yeah, I
have a strategy.
1156
01:24:59,528 --> 01:25:01,330
- [Ansel] Okay, but I
think it's important to
1157
01:25:01,364 --> 01:25:04,133
not strike her as,
as aggressive, you know.
1158
01:25:04,167 --> 01:25:05,668
- [Paul] Okay, whatever.
1159
01:25:05,701 --> 01:25:07,570
- The ax, oh.
1160
01:25:15,711 --> 01:25:21,450
This is just really bad
planning, it's just really bad.
1161
01:25:21,484 --> 01:25:24,753
I mean, we should
just ask her for it.
1162
01:25:44,940 --> 01:25:48,511
[haunting piano music]
1163
01:26:08,831 --> 01:26:09,765
Hello?
1164
01:26:22,645 --> 01:26:25,714
Excuse me, is
there anybody here?
1165
01:26:25,748 --> 01:26:26,882
[rifle clicks]
1166
01:26:26,915 --> 01:26:28,584
[Ansel gasps]
- FBI.
1167
01:26:28,617 --> 01:26:29,652
- Oh, god!
1168
01:26:29,685 --> 01:26:30,886
Oh, we're friends.
1169
01:26:30,919 --> 01:26:32,655
We, we're, we're neighbors.
1170
01:26:32,688 --> 01:26:34,623
- [Woman] Secret
service, BIA. [chuckles]
1171
01:26:34,657 --> 01:26:36,425
There goes everything.
1172
01:26:37,693 --> 01:26:39,295
[bird caws]
1173
01:26:39,328 --> 01:26:42,665
Suck my dick. [chuckles]
1174
01:26:45,701 --> 01:26:48,237
- [Ansel] Can you put
the, put the gun down?
1175
01:26:48,271 --> 01:26:50,439
- [Woman] State your business.
1176
01:26:50,473 --> 01:26:55,478
- I promise, I come here
with, with good intentions.
1177
01:26:55,511 --> 01:26:57,680
I'm friends with Maya Dardel.
1178
01:26:57,713 --> 01:26:59,315
- Oh, that bitch.
1179
01:26:59,348 --> 01:27:00,883
She drives up my
road, up my ass.
1180
01:27:00,916 --> 01:27:03,452
Now I'm a very private person.
1181
01:27:03,486 --> 01:27:05,354
- But um.
- I'm a people.
1182
01:27:05,388 --> 01:27:07,423
- I'm here to make peace.
1183
01:27:07,456 --> 01:27:12,361
Uh, I know about the uh,
the land dispute and uh,
1184
01:27:12,395 --> 01:27:17,400
I'd like to offer you, uh,
$300 for um, Maya's mailbox.
1185
01:27:17,433 --> 01:27:20,803
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wow.
1186
01:27:20,836 --> 01:27:23,672
You can't buy a whole country.
1187
01:27:23,706 --> 01:27:24,707
Shit.
1188
01:27:24,740 --> 01:27:26,675
- Sure, sure.
1189
01:27:26,709 --> 01:27:28,444
- Oh, worry, Billy.
1190
01:27:28,477 --> 01:27:31,480
[laughs] Right,
I forgot the plan.
1191
01:27:31,514 --> 01:27:34,550
The plan, the plan, the
plan, the plan. [hums]
1192
01:27:37,686 --> 01:27:38,687
Oat bran.
1193
01:27:38,721 --> 01:27:39,688
- What?
1194
01:27:39,722 --> 01:27:40,723
- Oat bran.
1195
01:27:44,527 --> 01:27:47,696
A man was sentenced to death.
1196
01:27:47,730 --> 01:27:49,365
[metal scrapes]
1197
01:27:49,398 --> 01:27:50,966
[gasps] What, what?
1198
01:27:50,999 --> 01:27:52,535
Okay. We gotta move.
1199
01:27:52,568 --> 01:27:53,736
- Move.
- Okay.
1200
01:27:53,769 --> 01:27:55,338
- [Woman] Move move move move.
1201
01:27:55,371 --> 01:27:56,672
- We can, we could
talk this out--
1202
01:27:56,705 --> 01:27:57,673
- Go, go, go.
- If you want.
1203
01:27:57,706 --> 01:27:59,408
- This way.
1204
01:27:59,442 --> 01:28:01,510
Move it, move it,
move it. [chuckles]
1205
01:28:01,544 --> 01:28:04,813
This is the Paradox of
the Unexpected Hanging.
1206
01:28:04,847 --> 01:28:06,349
It's from the 1950s.
1207
01:28:06,382 --> 01:28:08,083
As the crocodile said himself,
1208
01:28:08,116 --> 01:28:10,919
you can't know which
day you're gonna die.
1209
01:28:10,953 --> 01:28:13,922
So it can't be next Sunday.
1210
01:28:13,956 --> 01:28:15,924
- [Ansel] Why not?
1211
01:28:15,958 --> 01:28:17,826
- [Woman] Ah, because. the
judge says the hanging will
1212
01:28:17,860 --> 01:28:21,497
take place on one of the
seven days of next week.
1213
01:28:21,530 --> 01:28:26,502
You will not know which
day you'll be hanged.
1214
01:28:26,535 --> 01:28:29,872
You'll be hanged on a
day you don't expect.
1215
01:28:29,905 --> 01:28:32,107
- [Paul] Hello.
1216
01:28:32,140 --> 01:28:36,912
- But on Thursday, to
the prisoner's huge
fucking surprise,
1217
01:28:36,945 --> 01:28:39,782
the hangman arrives and says,
1218
01:28:39,815 --> 01:28:42,017
I'm gonna hang you in an hour.
1219
01:28:46,722 --> 01:28:47,656
- Fuck.
1220
01:28:48,957 --> 01:28:50,726
- Please, please don't kill me.
1221
01:28:50,759 --> 01:28:52,661
- [Woman] Kill you?
1222
01:28:52,695 --> 01:28:53,662
- Jesus Christ.
1223
01:28:56,865 --> 01:28:58,567
Ah!
1224
01:28:58,601 --> 01:29:00,369
[rifle clicks]
1225
01:29:00,403 --> 01:29:01,570
[woman screams]
1226
01:29:01,604 --> 01:29:04,072
[gunshot pops]
1227
01:29:04,106 --> 01:29:06,842
[gunshot pops]
1228
01:29:07,843 --> 01:29:10,679
[gunshot pops]
1229
01:29:13,115 --> 01:29:14,717
[gunshot pops]
1230
01:29:14,750 --> 01:29:16,519
What?
1231
01:29:16,552 --> 01:29:21,056
I, I told you then, you
chose not to hear me.
1232
01:29:21,089 --> 01:29:24,727
So I let you play
a little longer.
1233
01:29:24,760 --> 01:29:26,128
- Are you serious?
1234
01:29:26,161 --> 01:29:29,498
- [Maya] Mm hm,
he wins, you lose.
1235
01:29:29,532 --> 01:29:33,702
You lost the first
time you came up here.
1236
01:29:33,736 --> 01:29:35,704
Then what the fuck
have I been doing
1237
01:29:35,738 --> 01:29:41,510
up here making this
pathetic baby look bad?
1238
01:29:41,544 --> 01:29:43,712
- Ansel is a better
writer than you are.
1239
01:29:43,746 --> 01:29:47,950
He's not pathetic,
he's just sheltered.
1240
01:29:50,853 --> 01:29:52,821
What's so horrible about that?
1241
01:29:52,855 --> 01:29:54,557
- Are you fucking kidding me?
1242
01:29:54,590 --> 01:29:56,425
- It's never been
a real competition.
1243
01:29:56,459 --> 01:29:59,127
I've been using you to
see if Ansel's capable.
1244
01:29:59,161 --> 01:30:01,464
I need someone who can defend
1245
01:30:01,497 --> 01:30:04,667
the posthumous Maya
against your type.
1246
01:30:04,700 --> 01:30:07,603
They'll try to make
me into unstable
1247
01:30:07,636 --> 01:30:10,639
or hysterical or who knows what.
1248
01:30:12,575 --> 01:30:14,176
They'll butcher my books,
1249
01:30:14,209 --> 01:30:15,878
they'll rape my dead body.
1250
01:30:15,911 --> 01:30:19,582
[laughs] They'll
turn me into Plath.
1251
01:30:19,615 --> 01:30:20,716
- You wish.
1252
01:30:20,749 --> 01:30:21,717
- You see?
1253
01:30:21,750 --> 01:30:23,452
You see.
1254
01:30:23,486 --> 01:30:25,721
- What about the money
I've spent on gas?
1255
01:30:25,754 --> 01:30:28,524
You know I skipped work
again last Thursday.
1256
01:30:28,557 --> 01:30:30,693
Are you saying I get nothing?
1257
01:30:30,726 --> 01:30:32,828
- You got to fuck
me, didn't you?
1258
01:30:32,861 --> 01:30:35,731
- Oh, what an honor.
1259
01:30:35,764 --> 01:30:37,766
I'm just lucky I took
that initiative, you know,
1260
01:30:37,800 --> 01:30:40,202
because you would have just
left me with blue balls.
1261
01:30:44,773 --> 01:30:46,742
You know, I don't even
think you're even gonna
1262
01:30:46,775 --> 01:30:48,744
have the cojones
to kill yourself.
1263
01:30:48,777 --> 01:30:50,579
- Take a step back, Paul.
I don't like you hovering.
1264
01:30:50,613 --> 01:30:52,748
- Oh, you don't
like me hovering?
1265
01:30:56,719 --> 01:30:59,488
You're never gonna
kill yourself.
1266
01:30:59,522 --> 01:31:02,457
I know you, you'll
rot up here for years.
1267
01:31:04,527 --> 01:31:09,632
You just, you just wanted
some attention from some guy
1268
01:31:09,665 --> 01:31:14,670
who would never look at
you on a city street.
1269
01:31:14,703 --> 01:31:19,742
So you hide up here
like a little witch,
1270
01:31:19,775 --> 01:31:24,279
you do your make-up oh so
carefully and you lure us
1271
01:31:24,312 --> 01:31:27,550
up here to lick your
old pussy, because, hey,
1272
01:31:27,583 --> 01:31:30,653
I don't see any fucking
hot young 24-year-olds
1273
01:31:30,686 --> 01:31:33,522
fucking up your local
monopoly on womanhood.
1274
01:31:33,556 --> 01:31:35,123
Are you fucking serious?
1275
01:31:35,157 --> 01:31:37,125
- Out, you're out.
1276
01:31:37,159 --> 01:31:39,294
You don't talk to me like that
in my own house, you're out!
1277
01:31:39,327 --> 01:31:40,763
- I'm not out. You're out.
1278
01:31:40,796 --> 01:31:42,197
- [Maya] You're out.
1279
01:31:42,230 --> 01:31:43,532
Ansel!
1280
01:31:43,566 --> 01:31:44,933
- Get the fuck back!
1281
01:31:44,967 --> 01:31:47,035
- [Maya] You're out, out!
1282
01:31:47,069 --> 01:31:48,070
Get out!
1283
01:31:48,103 --> 01:31:50,105
[Maya gasps]
1284
01:31:50,138 --> 01:31:52,575
Out!
- I'm fucking sick of you!
1285
01:31:52,608 --> 01:31:54,710
- [Ansel] Get off of her!
1286
01:31:56,779 --> 01:31:58,013
[Maya screams]
1287
01:31:58,046 --> 01:32:00,883
- Fuck, fuck!
1288
01:32:03,686 --> 01:32:05,921
[Maya groans]
1289
01:32:08,090 --> 01:32:09,524
You fuck-ups.
1290
01:32:11,594 --> 01:32:13,729
I'm not even violent, I,
1291
01:32:15,330 --> 01:32:17,566
[Maya and Ansel breathe heavily]
1292
01:32:17,600 --> 01:32:21,003
you know what, you
get what you deserve.
1293
01:32:23,606 --> 01:32:25,774
I don't know anyone with
one ounce of testosterone
1294
01:32:25,808 --> 01:32:28,677
who wouldn't fucking defend
himself from you lunatics.
1295
01:32:36,151 --> 01:32:37,720
Are you okay?
1296
01:32:37,753 --> 01:32:39,955
[Paul screams
1297
01:32:40,989 --> 01:32:44,159
[Maya screams]
1298
01:32:44,192 --> 01:32:46,261
I'm fucking outta here.
1299
01:32:48,030 --> 01:32:51,333
Sociopaths! [screams]
1300
01:32:58,807 --> 01:33:02,277
[Maya breathes heavily]
1301
01:33:12,287 --> 01:33:15,724
[haunting piano music]
1302
01:33:59,401 --> 01:34:02,671
- You need to
navigate this exactly
1303
01:34:02,705 --> 01:34:05,774
because they're not
going to find a body,
1304
01:34:05,808 --> 01:34:08,811
and I don't want you having
to wait seven years before--
1305
01:34:08,844 --> 01:34:12,447
- Yeah, I um, I memorized
your binder system on Monday.
1306
01:34:12,480 --> 01:34:15,017
- Alright, alright, fine.
1307
01:34:15,050 --> 01:34:19,454
You'll talk about all this
again with your new lawyer.
1308
01:34:19,487 --> 01:34:23,726
All mine is yours,
even my lawyer.
1309
01:34:23,759 --> 01:34:24,993
- Thank you, Maya.
1310
01:34:26,128 --> 01:34:27,796
- Don't thank me.
1311
01:34:27,830 --> 01:34:31,767
He's an anarchist,
and I'm a monster.
1312
01:34:31,800 --> 01:34:36,138
This may all end up
being a nasty con-job.
1313
01:34:36,171 --> 01:34:39,007
I took out a giant
loan on this land
1314
01:34:39,041 --> 01:34:41,009
about a year ago
and put the money
1315
01:34:41,043 --> 01:34:44,780
in a little mafia boutique
bank in the Cayman Islands.
1316
01:34:44,813 --> 01:34:48,116
- Yeah, I read that
in the yellow binder.
1317
01:34:48,150 --> 01:34:49,952
Why did you do that?
1318
01:34:52,220 --> 01:34:53,922
- Complicated.
1319
01:34:53,956 --> 01:34:56,859
A dishonest broker,
my own mistakes.
1320
01:34:59,227 --> 01:35:00,763
- [Ansel] Hmm.
1321
01:35:06,835 --> 01:35:08,503
What is this?
1322
01:35:08,536 --> 01:35:11,373
- I don't know, looks like junk.
1323
01:35:11,406 --> 01:35:13,375
- Maybe something
that blew over here
1324
01:35:13,408 --> 01:35:16,779
in the windstorm from
Nora's junk-heap.
1325
01:35:23,151 --> 01:35:28,891
- Looks like it's
uh, some sort of tube
1326
01:35:28,924 --> 01:35:31,827
made out of a,
made out of cloth.
1327
01:35:34,096 --> 01:35:35,363
Here.
1328
01:35:38,033 --> 01:35:39,968
Please hold it.
1329
01:35:40,002 --> 01:35:41,203
- [Maya] Ech.
1330
01:35:43,105 --> 01:35:46,775
Ah, is there a plan
here, what are we doing?
1331
01:35:51,847 --> 01:35:54,817
- Put your head inside.
1332
01:35:54,850 --> 01:35:56,218
- [Maya] No thanks.
1333
01:35:57,385 --> 01:35:59,287
- [Ansel] Please, Maya.
1334
01:36:00,923 --> 01:36:02,791
Come on.
1335
01:36:02,825 --> 01:36:03,758
Come on.
1336
01:36:14,837 --> 01:36:15,770
Hi.
1337
01:36:18,841 --> 01:36:19,774
- Hi.
1338
01:36:23,611 --> 01:36:26,781
- [Ansel] It's
like Eden in here.
1339
01:36:31,253 --> 01:36:33,421
- You don't get the money
in the Cayman Islands.
1340
01:36:33,455 --> 01:36:38,593
Does that change your
loyalty to me, to my work?
1341
01:36:38,626 --> 01:36:41,830
- [Ansel] I don't
care about money.
1342
01:36:41,864 --> 01:36:42,797
- Oh, no?
1343
01:36:44,399 --> 01:36:46,268
You're not corrupt like me.
1344
01:36:49,104 --> 01:36:52,407
- No, I mean that I have enough.
1345
01:36:52,440 --> 01:36:54,342
- [Maya] Enough what?
1346
01:36:56,444 --> 01:37:00,215
- Money from, from
my father dying.
1347
01:37:08,656 --> 01:37:12,427
- [Maya] Not enough to
keep this land, though.
1348
01:37:12,460 --> 01:37:14,897
- [Ansel] Oh, I don't know.
1349
01:37:16,464 --> 01:37:18,433
I'll talk about it
with your lawyer,
1350
01:37:18,466 --> 01:37:21,937
when you're uh,
when you're gone.
1351
01:37:27,475 --> 01:37:31,980
[birds chirping]
- Oh, what a relief.
1352
01:37:33,015 --> 01:37:35,050
- [Ansel] What?
1353
01:37:35,083 --> 01:37:37,852
- My fucking ear just unplugged.
1354
01:38:02,244 --> 01:38:05,613
[haunting piano music]
1355
01:38:21,463 --> 01:38:24,666
I'll be gone in 10 minutes.
1356
01:38:24,699 --> 01:38:26,601
- Really?
- Uh huh.
1357
01:38:28,470 --> 01:38:31,206
- [Ansel] It's so early.
1358
01:38:31,239 --> 01:38:32,607
- [Maya] Come.
1359
01:38:37,312 --> 01:38:39,447
- [Ansel] Wait a second.
1360
01:38:39,481 --> 01:38:42,117
Um, I have something for you.
1361
01:38:44,686 --> 01:38:48,123
It's uh, I wrote it
1362
01:38:48,156 --> 01:38:50,025
down for you to take.
1363
01:38:53,295 --> 01:38:55,964
- [Maya] Hmm?
1364
01:38:55,998 --> 01:39:02,070
- It's a description of
Dinesen, of Karen Blixen.
1365
01:39:02,104 --> 01:39:05,473
- [Maya] Karen Blixen,
not my favorite.
1366
01:39:07,442 --> 01:39:10,478
- Okay, um, but
this was written by
1367
01:39:10,512 --> 01:39:14,682
one of the few men
who liked her that
1368
01:39:14,716 --> 01:39:21,589
managed not to fall into
her entourage of slaves.
1369
01:39:24,259 --> 01:39:27,662
It's kind of just, I'm just,
1370
01:39:27,695 --> 01:39:31,633
I'm just gonna, I'm
gonna read it for you.
1371
01:39:35,470 --> 01:39:39,407
She knew everything about
the sublimation of loss,
1372
01:39:39,441 --> 01:39:42,544
about suffering as the
nourishment of genius,
1373
01:39:42,577 --> 01:39:47,149
about pain's residence as
harmony in a work of art.
1374
01:39:47,182 --> 01:39:48,716
And all the same she yielded
1375
01:39:48,750 --> 01:39:51,653
to the most banal human
moods and impulses.
1376
01:39:51,686 --> 01:39:58,193
Pettiness, impatience,
caprice, stinginess.
1377
01:39:58,226 --> 01:39:59,627
She suffered from a craving
1378
01:39:59,661 --> 01:40:03,465
for power despite
her generosity.
1379
01:40:03,498 --> 01:40:05,433
She toyed with
human fates despite
1380
01:40:05,467 --> 01:40:07,802
her contempt for such toying.
1381
01:40:07,835 --> 01:40:11,539
She suffered from self-contempt
in spite of her mighty,
1382
01:40:11,573 --> 01:40:15,143
legitimate
self-confidence and pride.
1383
01:40:15,177 --> 01:40:17,245
She was a paradox,
outside of any
1384
01:40:17,279 --> 01:40:22,016
moral category,
and also, a bad judge.
1385
01:40:28,523 --> 01:40:32,094
- Now uh, help me
load up the car.
1386
01:40:32,127 --> 01:40:34,529
I can't carry any of these.
1387
01:40:37,499 --> 01:40:40,268
It's amazing how much
cosmetics and clothing
1388
01:40:40,302 --> 01:40:43,638
a woman needs just
to end her own life.
1389
01:40:50,845 --> 01:40:54,416
[haunting piano music]
1390
01:41:04,526 --> 01:41:07,362
In a window, I recognized you.
1391
01:41:10,498 --> 01:41:14,302
You must be the
one I can't name.
1392
01:41:14,336 --> 01:41:17,772
The man with a faint voice.
1393
01:41:17,805 --> 01:41:19,474
Behind my voice.
1394
01:41:21,443 --> 01:41:23,645
I thought it too was mine.
1395
01:41:25,880 --> 01:41:28,683
The cadence was borrowed.
1396
01:41:28,716 --> 01:41:31,886
Thick, muscular chords.
1397
01:41:31,919 --> 01:41:34,256
Like those in the
baritone's throat
1398
01:41:34,289 --> 01:41:37,459
one day in Europe somewhere.
1399
01:41:37,492 --> 01:41:42,497
Years ago, with a
friend who since died.
1400
01:41:42,530 --> 01:41:46,234
If clocks can be
trusted with one's life.
1401
01:41:48,736 --> 01:41:53,441
In some temple or chapel
we paid to hear a man sing.
1402
01:41:55,910 --> 01:41:58,346
I thought I recognized
in the baritone
1403
01:41:58,380 --> 01:42:01,683
sonic and temporal glass,
1404
01:42:01,716 --> 01:42:06,788
in the thickness of
that, a note of my own.
1405
01:42:06,821 --> 01:42:09,491
An affinity there.
1406
01:42:09,524 --> 01:42:13,661
Where such ciphers as
love and infinity's brook
1407
01:42:13,695 --> 01:42:16,664
known maudlin or
essential sense,
1408
01:42:18,733 --> 01:42:20,768
but anyway somehow sing.
1409
01:42:22,604 --> 01:42:25,340
Like one sings to a
child who can't touch.
1410
01:42:29,644 --> 01:42:31,713
Out there in the
part of my voice
1411
01:42:31,746 --> 01:42:34,449
that remains unselfconscious.
1412
01:42:38,520 --> 01:42:41,923
I thought I saw you
in the window there.
1413
01:42:45,427 --> 01:42:47,295
In that part of town.
1414
01:42:52,334 --> 01:42:54,469
I thought you
would look like me.
1415
01:42:56,738 --> 01:42:59,641
But you must be an adopted son.
96751
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