Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
2
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
3
00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:20,760
Lana
4
00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:22,680
Will you be my wife
5
00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:26,640
I'll make you the happiest boy
6
00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:30,360
I'll make me the happiest girl
7
00:00:32,960 --> 00:00:35,960
Everybody's looking I feel sick
8
00:00:36,320 --> 00:00:39,120
Can you please just say something
9
00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:56,040
[ It's so important to make someone happy ]
10
00:00:56,320 --> 00:01:00,200
[ Make just one somebody happy ]
11
00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:04,320
[Make just one heart to heart you... ]
12
00:01:05,320 --> 00:01:08,080
[...you care for ]
13
00:01:08,600 --> 00:01:12,320
[A smile that cheers you... ]
14
00:01:12,680 --> 00:01:16,400
[A face that lights when near you]
15
00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:22,560
[ Then love could possibly find you... ]
16
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,560
Charlie!
17
00:01:27,360 --> 00:01:28,360
Charlie!
18
00:01:29,320 --> 00:01:30,760
Charlie!
19
00:01:33,800 --> 00:01:37,160
That's what I used to say to Charlie
20
00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:40,440
But he’s dead now, he's dead.
21
00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:42,760
I used to sort of do the whistle and the (claps)
22
00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:45,280
He'd always come and sort of lick my right knee
23
00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:47,680
But he is dead now.
24
00:01:48,120 --> 00:01:50,400
(Phone rings)
25
00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:55,560
Hello there Vacuum Customer Complaints Helpline this is Alex speaking how can I help?
26
00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:59,080
(muffled phone conversation)
27
00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:00,200
Okay sir
28
00:02:00,680 --> 00:02:04,760
How much of the child is actually stuck within the unit itself?
29
00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:05,760
the main unit
30
00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:08,480
(muffled phone conversation)
31
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,560
Three thirds, three thirds...
32
00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:12,200
His whole arm sir, okay...
33
00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:14,240
Hello sir are you still there?
34
00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:15,360
He just hung up
35
00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:19,040
People don't always realise unfortunately
36
00:02:19,040 --> 00:02:22,960
how dangerous vacuum cleaners can be
37
00:02:23,640 --> 00:02:25,080
killing machines
38
00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:26,720
as we've just experienced
39
00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:28,440
obviously we hope he's not dead
40
00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:31,760
(birds cheeping)
41
00:02:31,920 --> 00:02:34,280
So this is my collection of DVDs
42
00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:37,240
So I'm just gonna quickly tell you my absolute favourites
43
00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,920
now you can probably tell because
44
00:02:39,920 --> 00:02:41,720
I've got two of them
45
00:02:42,080 --> 00:02:43,200
Superb.
46
00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:45,440
No other words that can describe the performances.
47
00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:47,120
And they obviously fall in love
48
00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:50,320
The thing is with thing one is separation is key.
49
00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:52,080
Remember cause he's in Seattle
50
00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:54,560
and she's the other side of America
51
00:02:54,560 --> 00:02:57,480
so it's always separation which is key
52
00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:59,000
and obviously they fall in love because of it.
53
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,000
(Exhales)
54
00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:09,200
Let me show you one of my favourite cookery books
55
00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:12,520
This is the serious Saturday lunch for eight
56
00:03:16,520 --> 00:03:21,920
Of course, I can scale that back for one
57
00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:22,920
very easily
58
00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:25,880
of course... it's not too much trouble
59
00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:29,040
You know it's sort of... two medium onions finely sliced for example
60
00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:30,320
sort of
61
00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:31,920
one onion for four
62
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:34,280
I suppose half an onion for two
63
00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:35,840
and just... quarter of an onion
64
00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:41,080
(cutlery clinking)
65
00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:55,960
ah Mum
66
00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:57,520
D'ya get your leaflet babe?
67
00:03:57,520 --> 00:04:00,320
You mean the one you just put through the letter box?
68
00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:03,120
I've never done nothing I've been getting the washing out
69
00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:04,920
Mum will you stop coming through the back door!
70
00:04:04,920 --> 00:04:06,760
What you on about? For God's sake
71
00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:07,760
Everytime
72
00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:08,760
Have a look
73
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,560
No one's allowed to mess him about like I do
74
00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:13,960
you know and if otherwise I'll have 'em
75
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:15,320
definitely
76
00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:20,080
Right hunny let's get this dating website thing
77
00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:21,080
Name
78
00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:22,080
Male
79
00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:22,720
Yeh..
80
00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:26,120
Travel.. right where do you like to travel?
81
00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,760
Well I don't like travelling Mum it's not..
82
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:31,280
I've told you, you know that I don't like travelling
83
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:34,200
You do like travelling we went to Pontin's
84
00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:38,680
Skegness! That's not travelling that's North East of England
85
00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:40,240
Okay.. Film..
86
00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:42,640
Well obviously again Sleepless in Seattle
87
00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:43,760
You've Got Mail
88
00:04:43,760 --> 00:04:45,600
And Chitty Chitty Bang Bang!
89
00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:48,080
(sings) Bang bang chitty chitty bang bang
90
00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:51,040
(sings) Our fine four faithful friend!
91
00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:52,120
That's for kids.
92
00:04:52,120 --> 00:04:53,960
Okay, right what are you gonna say to her?
93
00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:58,720
I'll say "Hi I'm Alex"
94
00:04:58,720 --> 00:04:59,720
"How are you?"
95
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:01,280
They'll say "how are you" and then
96
00:05:01,280 --> 00:05:03,600
I'll say... cause I thought about this.. cause I'm
97
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,480
a rare blood type of AB negative I thought
98
00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:08,640
I'll say "are you also the AB negative?"
99
00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:11,640
He hasn't had sex but who cares
100
00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:15,280
that makes him a nice guy maybe he'll do it right the first time
101
00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:49,320
it's er.... I don't know because
102
00:05:49,320 --> 00:05:52,440
Something I haven't said I've actually got a condition
103
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:57,400
where sometimes I can faint in rooms of people, lots and lots of people so
104
00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:59,240
sometimes I have a tendency to
105
00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:00,200
I'm really sorry to interrupt but
106
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,320
I just saw your badge I was just wondering are you going to the speed dating as well?
107
00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:04,160
Is it in there?
108
00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:06,960
Yes! Are you going in?
109
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,840
Yeah! Well I plan to
110
00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:14,680
What's with all the TV crew are you like a reality TV star?
111
00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:19,800
No actually they're making a documentary about me finding love
112
00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:25,280
Oh! They're taking you speed dating I get it
113
00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:27,280
Cool well
114
00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:29,160
Good luck
115
00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:30,160
Thank you
116
00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:31,920
See you in there
Good luck
117
00:06:38,280 --> 00:06:40,840
Um, I've got a fun fact as well.
118
00:06:40,840 --> 00:06:41,920
Yeah..
A fun fact..
119
00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:43,160
Go ahead.
120
00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:48,080
Did you know that gas...
...doesn't actually have a smell?
121
00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:49,400
Surely gas has...
122
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:53,480
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
So when was your last boyfriend?
123
00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:16,440
So...How did you find it?
124
00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:21,440
Really good... really really good, yeah
125
00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:24,040
very good.. lots of attractive females
126
00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:27,680
nice banter.. so it's good..
127
00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:28,960
good...
128
00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:31,480
Should we do this again then?
129
00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:35,400
Yes, yes...
130
00:07:35,400 --> 00:07:36,400
Definitely.
131
00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:39,440
definitely again yes I think so
132
00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:42,080
Great, great time..
133
00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:06,560
This is Fatlana
134
00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:07,560
and just like here
135
00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:09,920
there are over one hundred million single women
136
00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:11,800
in Russia and Eastern Europe
137
00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:13,400
Here at BridesRUs.com
138
00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:15,040
we help you find one of them
139
00:08:15,040 --> 00:08:17,520
beautiful women from Eastern Europe and Russia
140
00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:20,840
are looking for responsible, reliable and employed men to marry
141
00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:22,280
and to have a family with.
142
00:08:22,280 --> 00:08:24,160
Men,
you don't have to be rich
143
00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:25,600
but you are expected to
144
00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:26,840
provide a home...
145
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,520
furnish her with adequate romance
146
00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:30,960
and you must be able to afford basic activities
147
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:33,880
in order to maximise the potential of your future together.
148
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,000
Sign up now.
149
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:38,160
Your future is only one click away!
150
00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:42,560
We take no responsibility for our member's actions
151
00:08:44,560 --> 00:08:45,080
[cork pops]
152
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:47,640
[cheer]
153
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:50,680
I was gonna propose a toast
154
00:08:50,680 --> 00:08:51,680
actually
155
00:08:52,560 --> 00:08:54,720
so, I've met someone...
156
00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:57,280
I think we're in love..
157
00:08:57,440 --> 00:08:59,640
and, she's not a dog
158
00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:03,120
she's a human..
159
00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:04,440
but not a dog in a sort of..
160
00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:06,120
derogatory way..
161
00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:07,480
she's actually very sort of lovely.
162
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:08,480
..and cheers!
163
00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:09,480
okay then...
164
00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:18,280
So yes, sorry this is Natalie
165
00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:21,760
she's been doing some translating for us
166
00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:24,760
actually I think you probably saw Natalie the other day
167
00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:25,760
she was across the street
168
00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:28,840
I think she was breaking up with your girlfriend I think?
169
00:09:28,840 --> 00:09:30,720
I don't know or she was breaking up with you
170
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:31,840
Hi!
171
00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:33,880
Because I... Alex!
172
00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:39,440
I was gonna, I was gonna show you
173
00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:40,440
a photo
174
00:09:40,560 --> 00:09:42,160
a picture of Lana
175
00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:44,800
so I'm not sure where it's from
176
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:46,840
I'm not sure where it's from, I mean it's
177
00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:48,240
I wanna say it's some sort of
178
00:09:48,240 --> 00:09:49,240
some sort of quarry
179
00:09:49,920 --> 00:09:52,000
but er, yeah
180
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,560
it doesn't seem right does it
181
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:54,840
It's a beach in Moldova
182
00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:57,120
so as I was saying
183
00:09:57,520 --> 00:09:59,720
so it's sort of like Sleepless in Seattle
184
00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:02,000
one of my favourite, favourite films
185
00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:04,680
and of course like I was saying you know
186
00:10:04,680 --> 00:10:06,240
separation is key
187
00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:08,120
is really key
188
00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:10,560
and opposites always attract
189
00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:14,360
so for example, she doesn't like romance
190
00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:15,920
.. great!
191
00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:20,360
she likes tall blonde men
192
00:10:20,680 --> 00:10:22,680
so, not even close
193
00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:24,560
...not even...
194
00:10:24,560 --> 00:10:26,560
she likes cats
195
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:28,160
and hates dogs
196
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:30,200
so that's another one
197
00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:34,800
so if that's not opposites attract then
198
00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:36,560
I don't know what is!
199
00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:41,400
[birds cheeping]
200
00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:42,040
[glasses clink]
201
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:43,760
so cheers
cheers!
202
00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:45,440
[birds chirping]
203
00:10:47,920 --> 00:10:51,960
so I've obviously recently got a cat
204
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:54,040
called Ivarvara
205
00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:55,800
Russian name...
206
00:10:56,680 --> 00:10:59,000
I think she's just sitting over there at the moment
207
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:00,200
but obviously
208
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:04,400
you know I've tried quite hard to sort of
209
00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:05,720
be friends
210
00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:09,240
this is not like Charlie because obviously dogs are very different to cats
211
00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:13,440
[cat growls]
212
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:15,720
the thing, the problem is... really is..
213
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:17,480
you've got this sort of...
214
00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:18,960
buckles
215
00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:19,960
I mean
216
00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:21,880
buckles does not work for cats
217
00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:24,280
but maybe for dogs, so maybe if I just...
218
00:11:24,280 --> 00:11:25,720
stroke her here...
219
00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:28,400
put this thing on her
220
00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:31,920
[cat groans]
221
00:11:31,920 --> 00:11:34,760
[Alex gasps]
222
00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:42,600
[cat growls]
223
00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,440
that has happened a few times
224
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:46,640
so that's..
225
00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:47,720
ten..
226
00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:49,040
that's why...
227
00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:51,280
she actually got me there
228
00:11:51,280 --> 00:11:54,840
you can actually see the little dimple there she just got me
229
00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:56,480
it's actually bleeding
230
00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:04,600
[TV movie plays]
231
00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:08,400
so, there's actually.. I don't know if you know..
232
00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:09,880
but there's a recipe
233
00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,760
and a formula to love
234
00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:13,840
to finding love
235
00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:17,200
and let me tell you, so...
236
00:12:17,560 --> 00:12:19,200
1. boy meets girl
237
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:21,160
okay
238
00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:23,120
2. opposites attract
239
00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:24,360
right
240
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:27,600
3. he likes her
241
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:30,280
4. and she wants something else
242
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,360
5. separation is key
243
00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:36,720
always, always the separation
244
00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:38,080
very important part
245
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:39,720
then...
246
00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:42,440
6. turmoil at three quarter mark
247
00:12:42,840 --> 00:12:44,440
and then
248
00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:47,160
7. love...
249
00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:54,440
[airplane landing]
250
00:13:44,520 --> 00:13:46,800
[Alex vomits]
251
00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:51,160
[coughs]
252
00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:11,880
You don't have to be rich but you are expected to
253
00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:14,480
provide a home, furnish her with adequate romance
254
00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:17,160
and you must be able to afford basic activities
255
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:20,160
in order to maximise the potential of your future together
256
00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:23,200
Sign up now, your future is only one click away.
257
00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:26,000
I mean maybe it is a bit sudden
258
00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:29,240
bit sudden...
259
00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:34,240
I'm just, just going through all the sort of different scenarios
260
00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,280
in my head
261
00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:41,000
like, sort of, you know what if she doesn't want me?
262
00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:42,000
[scoffs]
263
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,640
you know what if...
264
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:44,640
what if...
265
00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:46,480
she doesn't like the surprise?
266
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:53,520
What do you guys think?
267
00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:11,040
[boy shouts]
268
00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:23,720
There's a child! ha!
269
00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:24,280
[child sneazes]
270
00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:25,480
Football!
271
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,520
I'm just gonna..
272
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:44,800
[knocks]
273
00:15:52,720 --> 00:15:53,840
Alex!?
274
00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:55,480
Hello Lana
275
00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:57,760
[door slams]
276
00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,440
Shit!
277
00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:08,760
[footsteps climbing stairs]
278
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:13,440
[door knock]
279
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:22,480
Lana
280
00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:24,880
[door closes]
281
00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:52,440
So, what made you join BridesRus.com?
282
00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:02,640
Okay... Um...
283
00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:07,480
Okay, what about love?
Could you tell us what that means to you?
284
00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:09,800
Love?
285
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:13,680
You want to know what love is?
286
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,600
Love is...
287
00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:20,040
...when you tell yourself...
288
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,280
...I’ll go through anything...
289
00:17:22,280 --> 00:17:23,600
...I’ll risk everything...
290
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:28,320
...because if I fall then someone
will surely catch me.
291
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:31,080
And then you fall...
292
00:17:31,720 --> 00:17:34,920
...into the dirt outside.
293
00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:43,960
Anything...else?
294
00:17:49,800 --> 00:17:50,800
Love...
295
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:55,880
...is when you say...
296
00:17:56,320 --> 00:17:58,400
..."How wonderful you are...
297
00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:00,760
...how much I would love
to be with you...
298
00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:03,120
...how happy we would be together."
299
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,760
And someone else comes along...
300
00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:08,560
...just as good...
301
00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:10,480
...and takes them away.
302
00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:13,360
And you end up with what’s left.
303
00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:14,360
Less wonderful...
304
00:18:14,360 --> 00:18:15,800
...less good...
305
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:17,680
...and why?
306
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:39,400
[Russian muttering]
307
00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:42,240
[Russian muttering]
308
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:09,080
That's a nice top
309
00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:14,040
Where did you get the top from?
310
00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:15,600
Where's it from?
311
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,200
[Russian speaking]
312
00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:20,360
[Russian speaking]
313
00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:35,240
Where's Mr Marusva?
314
00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:36,720
Mister?
315
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:38,960
What?
316
00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:41,720
Mr Marusva?
317
00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:44,800
Mister? Mister? Mister?
Yes
318
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:46,120
Mister...
[Russian word]
319
00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:47,080
sorry?
320
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:48,040
[Russian word]
321
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:54,320
I've actually got an app
322
00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:58,400
which I sometimes use with Lana, clever sort of invention
323
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:01,080
sometimes just say the word
324
00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:04,040
and then it gives you the answer
325
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:07,080
so you can sort of
326
00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:08,840
so if you can just say the word
327
00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:11,040
so, Mister Marusva is...
328
00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:12,880
[Russian word]
329
00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:15,680
Ooh, where's the button..
330
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,200
Dead
331
00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:31,320
I learnt a few things about Moldova
332
00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:37,120
Yeah so in Moldova there's lots of wine
333
00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:38,520
Wine!
334
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:39,680
lots of wine...
335
00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:40,600
Right!
Yea
336
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:45,360
Everybody's drunk all the time
337
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:54,480
and that was it.. and it's funny because in Moldova there's the largest consumption of
338
00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:57,120
alcohol per person
339
00:20:57,120 --> 00:20:59,000
in the whole world
340
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:00,440
in Moldova
341
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:04,040
so alcohol per person
342
00:21:05,120 --> 00:21:09,720
so largest consumption in the whole country
343
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:12,800
Water?
344
00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:22,880
That was it... it was one of the largest
345
00:21:22,880 --> 00:21:24,720
or it used to be one of the largest
346
00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:26,640
Jewish communities
347
00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:27,640
in Moldova
348
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:28,840
What?
349
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:31,280
Lot's of jews!
350
00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:33,840
used to be
351
00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:35,120
used to be
352
00:21:35,120 --> 00:21:36,880
He's...
...he's a foreigner.
353
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:39,240
Don't worry, don't worry.
354
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:18,520
[glass tapping]
355
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:36,280
Alex...
356
00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:37,480
...don't!
357
00:22:37,560 --> 00:22:38,480
Alex!
358
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:39,840
Alex!
359
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:43,760
Lana...
it makes me so proud
360
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:46,880
to think of the things
361
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:50,560
that we could do
362
00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:53,440
together to show the whole world
363
00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:55,600
that love
364
00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:57,720
is not one
365
00:22:58,280 --> 00:22:59,960
but it's two
366
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:03,240
two people it takes
367
00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:04,680
to be happy
368
00:23:06,120 --> 00:23:07,720
to look to a future
369
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:09,400
that's bright
370
00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:14,600
you'll be my sun in the morning
371
00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:19,080
and I'll be your moon in the night
372
00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:24,760
we'll be like peas in a pod
373
00:23:24,760 --> 00:23:27,560
but a pod with room for more peas
374
00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:29,080
Lana
375
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:31,880
will you be my wife
376
00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:36,360
everybody's looking, I feel sick
377
00:23:36,360 --> 00:23:39,200
can you please just say something?
378
00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:16,160
[pathetic applause]
379
00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:20,840
I'm going to the toilet.
380
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:21,840
Toilet?
381
00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:23,920
Going to the toilet.
382
00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:31,680
Lana, the bathroom is that way
383
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:33,280
[door closes]
384
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:36,680
Bathroom's that way
385
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:57,520
what I'm supposed to do now is put that on I think
386
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:09,160
[claps]
387
00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:36,760
Yes, well it was all very strange.
388
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:42,880
He was okay at first.
389
00:25:45,120 --> 00:25:49,040
But to propose to me during dessert?
390
00:25:50,120 --> 00:25:51,440
I mean really...
391
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,000
...I tried to keep my composure...
392
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:56,880
...in front of the guests.
393
00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:59,880
Of course I would never
have agreed to get married...
394
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:01,160
...so quickly.
395
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:41,360
Yeah?
A fun fact.
396
00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:56,840
Okay! Food time, here we go
397
00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:01,760
Ooof look at that...
398
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:06,120
I call this chilli con Natalie
399
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:10,040
Eat up smells delicious
400
00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:20,600
These are cute
401
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,120
woof woof woof woof woof
402
00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:30,280
Watch out you might break them
403
00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:36,440
Alright, did we have a bite? Food in your belly makes you happy
404
00:27:36,440 --> 00:27:39,680
Let's play a game it's called guess the ingredients put it in your mouth have a bite
405
00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:41,400
I'm not very good at that game
406
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:42,480
Have a bite
407
00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:43,640
I'll help you out
408
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:47,160
I'll help you out I'll give you a hand there's sausage in it
409
00:27:48,120 --> 00:27:49,480
sausage...
410
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:52,320
erm.... fenagreek
411
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:53,520
fena-what?
412
00:27:59,040 --> 00:28:00,200
Fish?
413
00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:01,560
Fish?!
414
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:06,120
I just told you there's sausage why would you put fish in it?
415
00:28:06,120 --> 00:28:08,800
Well I said I couldn't play this game I'm not very good at it
416
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:12,760
[phone buzzes]
417
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:14,600
It's a private number
418
00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:16,200
Well answer it
419
00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:17,600
Hello?
420
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:24,480
er.... hi Lana
421
00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:26,560
erm... er...
422
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:30,720
er yes... she recognises my voice.. she knows it's me
423
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:32,520
That's because she called your phone
424
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:34,640
Yeah... I'm... er... I'm...
425
00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:37,440
I'm good thank you
426
00:28:37,440 --> 00:28:39,760
erm.... er......
427
00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:45,400
Yes, I've got Natalie here to translate
428
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,920
so... yeah...
429
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:51,800
Lana, lana!
430
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:53,040
Hello?
431
00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:54,720
Yes, hello?
432
00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:58,480
Yes, so...fine.
433
00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:01,000
See you. Okay.
434
00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:02,760
Okay, bye.
435
00:29:03,840 --> 00:29:04,680
Bye.
436
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:08,840
What did she say?
437
00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:10,680
what did she say?
438
00:29:10,760 --> 00:29:14,480
Lana! What did she say?!
439
00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:15,720
when?
440
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:16,480
Just then!
441
00:29:16,480 --> 00:29:18,280
Now! What did she say?
442
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:19,960
[laughs]
443
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:20,360
What?
444
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,400
She said she's coming
445
00:29:22,400 --> 00:29:24,320
She's coming. She's coming here?
446
00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:26,720
To see me?
To England
447
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:28,120
To see me?
To see you
448
00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:31,440
I've gotta tell Charlie! I've gotta tell Charlie! Charlie!
What are you doing?!
449
00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:34,920
Charlie! Charlie Lana's coming, Lana's coming!
Come back!
450
00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:36,040
Charlie's dead!
451
00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:40,160
Oh f***! It's a very funny line
452
00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:41,520
But they fall in love
453
00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:43,040
And cause opposites attract
454
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:45,600
you see because she was a big hollywood star
455
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:49,680
and he was just a person who owned a book shop in Notting Hill in London
456
00:29:49,680 --> 00:29:52,000
She just pops in.. he falls in love with her
457
00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:53,280
but she wants something else
458
00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:56,680
You see and it all works they come together and they fall in love
459
00:29:57,120 --> 00:29:58,720
"I wanted it to be you"
460
00:29:58,720 --> 00:30:00,720
Let me start again cause my voice went...
461
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:02,720
"I wanted it to be you..."
462
00:30:02,720 --> 00:30:04,840
and he comes and knocks on the door at Christmas time
463
00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:06,880
and he says... he's got the cards like that
464
00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:09,400
and he says "say it's carollers"
465
00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:13,400
and she says to her husband "it's just carollers darling don't come down!"
466
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:16,640
and then he gets the next one and they all go and eventually he says
467
00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:18,840
I sort of.. I love you
468
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:31,680
At the train station to pick up Lana
469
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:35,840
I think.. I mean she is.. she's a bit late
470
00:30:35,840 --> 00:30:40,760
that's the only thing.. she should be here pretty soon really
471
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:01,240
Last train just pulled in
472
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:08,440
I've checked all the passengers and there's no sign of Lana
473
00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:17,480
I've just finished checking all the bathrooms as well the one on the left and the two down there
474
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:20,320
she hasn't even gone to the bathroom
475
00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:29,680
There's not much point blocking the entrances and exits when she doesn't show up so...
476
00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:33,120
So you know it's just one of those
[Italian stranger cheers]
477
00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:37,640
[Italian stranger waves hello]
Sorry, sorry this is not the time
478
00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:39,560
We're filming a documentary
479
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:40,920
so...
480
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:43,640
Are you a couple?
481
00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:46,640
How long have you been together?
482
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:52,360
Do you speak English?
483
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:53,360
No
484
00:31:59,840 --> 00:32:02,640
When you realise you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody
485
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:06,600
You want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible
486
00:32:15,640 --> 00:32:21,120
[London underground announcement]
487
00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:36,360
[TV movie plays]
488
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:40,400
[doorbell rings]
489
00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:53,760
[muttering] take my dressing gown off
490
00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:58,440
Flowers!
491
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:13,080
this is the first day of my li..
492
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:14,080
[door knocks]
493
00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:18,840
Welcome!
494
00:33:21,040 --> 00:33:23,080
Do the crew sleep here?
495
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:25,720
Do they sleep here?
Sorry?
496
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:30,040
Do they sleep here with you in the house?
497
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:33,040
You need to what sorry?
498
00:33:33,040 --> 00:33:34,520
Do they...
You need..
499
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:35,200
Do they..
500
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:36,320
...do they...
You need to...
501
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:37,280
...here...
502
00:33:37,280 --> 00:33:38,960
...sleep?
You need to spurt
503
00:33:39,680 --> 00:33:40,640
Do they sleep here?
504
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:41,840
You need to spurt
505
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:44,560
you need to... you need to...
506
00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:46,040
okay...
507
00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:48,000
Just give me two seconds
508
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:49,600
because I can actually just call
509
00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:51,160
Natalie
510
00:33:52,080 --> 00:33:55,840
So... sorry to keep you awake
511
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:58,800
at this time.. I saw you sleeping through the window
512
00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:02,360
if you could do some translating that'd be excellent
513
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:05,920
I'm trying to understand 'I need to spurt'
514
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:10,560
I need to spurt?
515
00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:12,920
so erm...
516
00:34:12,920 --> 00:34:14,440
yeah.. so erm..
517
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:17,560
we've got the guest bedroom here
518
00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:20,960
and then my bedroom is just up the stairs
519
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:23,080
just at the top
520
00:34:23,080 --> 00:34:25,400
so it's... er... yeah..
521
00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:28,760
so guest bedroom and then it's erm....
522
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:33,640
got the... my bedroom just at the top of these stairs
523
00:34:33,640 --> 00:34:39,120
that's a sensor so sometimes if you can be on the landing
524
00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:43,920
just in case sometimes it can be a bit dangerous
525
00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:46,920
you don't wanna sort of be up.. god it's hot isn't it
526
00:34:48,080 --> 00:34:52,120
[doorbell rings]
That's Natalie I think let me just...
527
00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:53,920
Two seconds, two seconds Lana
528
00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:00,520
Hi Natalie. Come in come in...
529
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:01,520
How you doing?
Come in, come in.
530
00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:02,880
I'm good, I'm good, I'm good
Can't believe she actually came.
531
00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:04,320
I know it's amazing, I'm very...
Who's the little bag for?
532
00:35:04,320 --> 00:35:05,520
Yeah this is for Ivan.
533
00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:06,920
This is Ivan's...yeah.
534
00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:08,000
He's her son.
535
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:12,600
Hello.
536
00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:16,040
You must be Lana.
Oh...you speak Russian!
537
00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:17,800
Yes I'm Natalya...
538
00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:20,160
...or Natalie.
Oh of course, how lovely to meet you.
539
00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:22,120
My pleasure. Lana, of course.
I'm Lana.
540
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,480
We spoke on the phone.
The telephone yes.
541
00:35:24,480 --> 00:35:27,040
It's like we know each other now.
Yes indeed we do!
542
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:28,560
So what I was just saying is we've got the guest bedroom in there
543
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:30,240
Then we've got my bedroom just at the top
544
00:35:30,240 --> 00:35:32,080
Alex is trying to say something.
545
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:34,400
He's talking, but I don't understand.
546
00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:36,720
Yes I know, but my Russian is a bit so-so...
547
00:35:36,720 --> 00:35:40,640
He just talks so fast, I can't understand.
so it's the guest bedroom there if you could tell her
548
00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:43,000
And then my bedroom is up...
549
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:45,600
This is the...the...um...
550
00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:47,520
so that's the guest..
551
00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:50,520
The guest bedroom, you must be tired.
Ah! Good.
552
00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:51,160
Alex.
553
00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:51,920
Alex.
554
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:55,280
I'll do it myself, Alex.
555
00:35:55,280 --> 00:35:57,120
Yes that's a good idea.
556
00:35:57,120 --> 00:35:59,600
And my bedroom is just at the top of the stairs
557
00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:03,320
that's guest and that's...
558
00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:05,520
Come, you can sleep in here.
559
00:36:05,520 --> 00:36:07,680
So he can....yeah that's the...
560
00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:08,960
...for the guests...
561
00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:10,840
...to sleep.
562
00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:14,040
It's fine.
How was the flight?
563
00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:18,640
Yes it was good but we got lost.
Really?
564
00:36:24,680 --> 00:36:27,640
So I'm actually gonna show you the actual door from Notting Hill
565
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:30,480
it's a blue door a big sort of blue door
566
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:32,640
I think it's....
567
00:36:32,760 --> 00:36:34,840
this one here
568
00:36:34,840 --> 00:36:37,520
let me just move this rubbish because it looks a bit better
569
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:39,960
let's get this sort of trash out the way
570
00:36:39,960 --> 00:36:43,400
so basically let me tell you this is where Hugh Grant's character William Thacker
571
00:36:43,400 --> 00:36:45,920
lived for the film it's actually his actual house
572
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:48,280
and interestingly enough a fun fact
573
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:50,920
Richard Curtis is a writer of Notting Hill
574
00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:52,760
and he lived here for the duration of the filming
575
00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:55,320
this was his house before that as well
576
00:36:56,440 --> 00:36:58,760
and another thing... orange juice... it's funny we have it
577
00:36:59,720 --> 00:37:01,960
basically Julia Roberts character Anna Scott
578
00:37:02,560 --> 00:37:04,680
She gets it spilled on by William Thacker
Do you want some?
579
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:05,440
Yes?
580
00:37:05,440 --> 00:37:06,440
who's Hugh Grant
581
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:09,640
And it's quite a funny sort of moment in the film
Shall we go?
582
00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:10,760
We're going to go to a cafe.
583
00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:12,480
another fact about thre seasons as well
584
00:37:14,640 --> 00:37:19,160
basically Hugh Grant walks through the street and it goes from Summer, Autumn, Winter, Spring
585
00:37:19,160 --> 00:37:20,880
but it's actually filmed in one day
586
00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:24,240
it's very clever, sort of, filmmaking
587
00:37:24,240 --> 00:37:27,200
It's nice! It's very good isn't it
588
00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:35,640
I've got a quick homage to Love Actually
589
00:37:35,640 --> 00:37:36,920
you have to look at the cards
590
00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:42,080
Look at the cards
They have such interesting taxis, right?
591
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:44,080
That's wrong... that's the wrong one...
592
00:37:44,080 --> 00:37:45,600
that's not in the right place
593
00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:47,640
that is not in the right place hang on
594
00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:51,520
That's not in the right place cause that should be actually..
That's the Prime Minister's house.
You want to have a look?
595
00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:52,560
That shouldn't be there...
Let's go. Let's go.
596
00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:54,600
that..
597
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:07,840
Look, look. That's the Prime Minister's car.
598
00:38:08,720 --> 00:38:12,080
Imagine if they came out now.
599
00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:15,880
Quick, get a photo, quick photo
600
00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:18,400
Ready? 1, 2, 3...
601
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:28,360
Look... er.. sorry... I just..
[phone buzzes]
602
00:38:28,360 --> 00:38:32,120
wanted.. it might be a really stupid question..
603
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:33,840
erm...but.. er...
604
00:38:33,840 --> 00:38:37,160
particularly in light of our recent shopping excursion
605
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:41,040
I just wondered if ever.. by any chance
606
00:38:41,040 --> 00:38:45,080
you might be..... er.... obviously not...
607
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:47,640
..because I've only slept with nine people
608
00:38:48,880 --> 00:38:52,840
but to recap in a slightly sort of clearer version
609
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:55,600
in the words of David Cassidy
610
00:38:55,720 --> 00:38:59,600
and while he was still with the Partridge family
611
00:38:59,680 --> 00:39:02,320
I think I love you...
612
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:09,200
What are you on about...Alex?
613
00:39:09,680 --> 00:39:13,240
Exactly.. but anyway that's what Hugh Grant says in
614
00:39:13,240 --> 00:39:16,280
Four Weddings and a Funeral which is filmed just over there by
615
00:39:16,280 --> 00:39:19,000
by Waterloo bridge and when he professes his love to
616
00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:20,640
Andy McDowall's character
617
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:23,720
it's what was in his speech
618
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:25,160
Four Weddings...
619
00:39:26,240 --> 00:39:28,320
It's just filmed literally over there
620
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:29,360
Ice cream?
621
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:30,320
You want ice cream?
622
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:31,400
Let's go. Let's go.
623
00:39:31,720 --> 00:39:33,080
We're going for ice cream.
624
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:34,280
Four Weddings..
625
00:39:45,520 --> 00:39:48,320
a very sort of satisfying day...
626
00:40:00,280 --> 00:40:03,160
[Russian speaking]
627
00:40:03,920 --> 00:40:06,880
...from Abba, don't do it again, no no no...
628
00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:10,760
Anyway so I saw her and she stood by you know that famous
629
00:40:10,760 --> 00:40:12,960
Egyptian statue you know the one with the massive.. hold on...
630
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:14,440
where is he in bed? yea...
631
00:40:14,440 --> 00:40:16,680
the massive... [whistles]
632
00:40:16,960 --> 00:40:21,680
And then he come up to me and said "oh look you must be standing next to my twin"
633
00:40:21,720 --> 00:40:24,000
I did like that though it was funny wasn't it?
634
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:25,480
He's hanndsome isn't he?
635
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:26,360
I try..
636
00:40:26,360 --> 00:40:27,640
Billy big ba...
oi!
637
00:40:28,480 --> 00:40:30,080
You do don't you...
638
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:34,200
Don't get flush!
639
00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,600
What! No she likes a little bit of flash you know.. flash the cash..
640
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:38,400
I flash the cash, she flash the gash you know...
641
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:39,480
[laughing]
642
00:40:39,800 --> 00:40:41,720
Something like that wasn't it...but anyway seriously...
643
00:40:41,880 --> 00:40:43,240
I thought I'd get her number d'you know what I mean?
644
00:40:43,640 --> 00:40:45,120
so I pushed her in the corner
645
00:40:45,400 --> 00:40:48,160
and I said to her "oi I'm gonna get your number"
646
00:40:48,160 --> 00:40:50,160
"I wanna take you out for a drink or a little bit"
647
00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:52,120
She likes a bit of Italian eh?
648
00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:54,000
She likes a bit of Italian she's Irish what you talking about?
649
00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:56,600
Nah I'm joking... she loves it!
650
00:40:58,120 --> 00:40:59,840
but no... I'll tell you what...
651
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:01,640
she's a fox your mum mate
652
00:41:02,160 --> 00:41:04,920
he thinks I'm a fox.. a sexy fox darling
653
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:05,800
Well you're not.
654
00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:08,800
I didn't say sexy... they're the ones who put shit in the garden
655
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:10,040
[laughs]
656
00:41:10,040 --> 00:41:13,480
actually I dunno... foxes you know what I mean?
657
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:18,400
even better when they're on all fours.. [howling]
658
00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:21,480
Nah seriously look at her legs. I have.. not bad
659
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,240
Been there... done it... so has he!
660
00:41:24,240 --> 00:41:26,400
You're not a fox are you Mum
661
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:28,800
That's not very nice is it come on!
662
00:41:29,720 --> 00:41:33,760
Lighten up just cause you haven't had a girlfriend for twenty years
663
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:35,240
Sorry about that..
664
00:41:35,240 --> 00:41:36,440
Nineteen and a half..
665
00:41:36,440 --> 00:41:37,360
makes no difference..
666
00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:39,320
Nineteen and a half years Mum...
667
00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:41,080
Go on tell them the story...
668
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:42,080
Go on...
669
00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:45,360
Don't be shy I wanna hear it come on son let's have it
670
00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:48,480
My girlfriend when I was eleven and a half
671
00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:52,200
and we were playing in the playground and we were in love
672
00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:56,480
by the way...
...playing in the playground and my friend actually sort of..
673
00:41:56,480 --> 00:41:59,320
pushed her over and I went to help her
674
00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:03,400
and her hair was actually caught under the fence
675
00:42:03,520 --> 00:42:06,560
and I hoiked her up I tried to help her up
676
00:42:06,680 --> 00:42:10,680
but unfortunately half her scalf came clean off
677
00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:14,000
at the time but Mum I've said this before
678
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:15,440
we were in love
679
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:16,720
and it was a mistake
680
00:42:16,720 --> 00:42:20,120
Lighten up babe, lighten up....
681
00:42:20,600 --> 00:42:22,760
Anyway who wants some pudding some spotted dick?
682
00:42:22,760 --> 00:42:23,600
Ooh hello
683
00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:24,600
Spotted dick?
684
00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:26,760
Two portions of dick over here one for later!
685
00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:28,040
hold the spots!
686
00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:30,480
[text message ringtone]
687
00:42:40,240 --> 00:42:43,000
Sorry, we just wanted to ask you a question.
688
00:42:45,520 --> 00:42:46,680
Alright.
689
00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,760
Since we haven't had a chance to
speak to you, we were just wondering...
690
00:42:51,480 --> 00:42:53,560
What made you come to London?
691
00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:02,320
To marry Alex.
692
00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:09,480
[door creaks open]
693
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:29,400
I'll show you.
Go on.
694
00:43:29,400 --> 00:43:31,200
But you can't laugh.
Go on.
695
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:32,360
You can't laugh.
696
00:43:33,040 --> 00:43:34,000
What's that?
697
00:43:34,840 --> 00:43:36,840
What happened? Did you cut it off?
698
00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:37,640
I know.
699
00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:39,280
It looks like a toe.
It's bad, I know.
700
00:43:39,280 --> 00:43:40,520
Wine for the ladies..
701
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:42,160
Oh thank you
702
00:43:42,160 --> 00:43:43,680
there we go..
703
00:43:43,680 --> 00:43:46,640
All ladies love wine
True, thank you
704
00:43:46,640 --> 00:43:50,040
Especially all that will get very tipsy
705
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:53,480
remember what I was saying about Moldova and the facts about lots of wine
706
00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:57,720
everyone was drunk..
No just don't.. it's not a good story
707
00:43:57,960 --> 00:44:01,600
Okay shall we do something?
708
00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:03,560
Huh?
709
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:07,240
A game. Charades! Charades...
710
00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:09,120
Film.. film...
711
00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:11,600
Two words
712
00:44:12,360 --> 00:44:13,640
First word
713
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:15,760
burning..
714
00:44:15,760 --> 00:44:17,080
Iron, Iron, Iron.
715
00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:18,360
Iron, Iron.
716
00:44:18,560 --> 00:44:19,720
er..
717
00:44:19,720 --> 00:44:20,520
erm...
718
00:44:20,520 --> 00:44:21,360
Hair...
Thug.
719
00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:24,240
sort of very... Hitler!
720
00:44:25,120 --> 00:44:26,240
Boobs...
Tits.
721
00:44:27,520 --> 00:44:28,240
boobs and...
722
00:44:28,240 --> 00:44:29,040
Willy?
723
00:44:30,120 --> 00:44:31,120
Dick?
724
00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:32,600
Dick.
725
00:44:32,600 --> 00:44:33,560
Penis.
726
00:44:33,560 --> 00:44:35,360
Penis... nothing
727
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:37,160
Penis.
Dogs...
728
00:44:39,600 --> 00:44:40,880
big strong..
729
00:44:40,880 --> 00:44:42,040
Willy.
730
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:43,720
Penis, penis.
731
00:44:43,720 --> 00:44:44,240
penis
732
00:44:44,240 --> 00:44:45,920
Penis, penis.
733
00:44:45,920 --> 00:44:47,000
penis
734
00:44:48,040 --> 00:44:50,240
First word, number one word
735
00:44:50,320 --> 00:44:51,120
ironing
736
00:44:51,120 --> 00:44:52,280
Ironing.
Ironing?
737
00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:53,760
it's not Nazis?
738
00:44:54,480 --> 00:44:57,040
Ironwoman... Ironman!
739
00:44:57,120 --> 00:45:00,960
[cheering]
740
00:45:01,320 --> 00:45:02,160
Sleep.
741
00:45:02,480 --> 00:45:06,320
Yeah I did... no talking...
742
00:45:07,680 --> 00:45:08,320
hey!
743
00:45:10,760 --> 00:45:13,120
ahhhh... third word
744
00:45:13,120 --> 00:45:14,400
No sleep?
745
00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:15,400
No sleep?
746
00:45:16,040 --> 00:45:17,040
No sleep.
747
00:45:19,040 --> 00:45:21,440
[whispering] Seattle
Seattle!
748
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:23,360
Sleepless in Seattle!
749
00:45:23,360 --> 00:45:25,680
Sleepless in Seattle, yes
750
00:45:26,720 --> 00:45:27,720
My favourite film
751
00:45:29,320 --> 00:45:31,360
[whispers] shark
Yeah shark...
752
00:45:31,640 --> 00:45:32,960
Jaws!
Jaws!
753
00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:34,560
[squeals]
754
00:45:34,560 --> 00:45:37,360
Well done
755
00:45:42,160 --> 00:45:45,920
so this is quite a traditional dish shepherd's pie
756
00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:48,240
but the problem is it's an interesting fact actually because
757
00:45:48,240 --> 00:45:51,240
a lot of people misunderstand shepherd's pie because
758
00:45:51,240 --> 00:45:53,120
it's supposed to be with lamb but
759
00:45:53,120 --> 00:45:56,360
a lot of people actually mistakenly do it with beef
760
00:45:56,760 --> 00:45:59,600
which is wrong it should be with lamb all the time
761
00:45:59,600 --> 00:46:04,720
and in fact it was invented in Scotland
762
00:46:05,320 --> 00:46:06,320
Scotland...
763
00:46:06,560 --> 00:46:09,680
Scottish people? Erm..
764
00:46:09,680 --> 00:46:11,760
[in Scottish accnet] Scottish!
765
00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:15,520
Scottish!
766
00:46:15,520 --> 00:46:16,880
Crazy!
767
00:46:16,880 --> 00:46:18,200
Oh God!
768
00:46:19,240 --> 00:46:21,160
that's Scottish people
769
00:46:21,160 --> 00:46:24,120
quite.. can be quite crazy yes
770
00:46:24,120 --> 00:46:30,520
but they're very nice people once you get to know them
771
00:46:31,880 --> 00:46:34,040
start by chopping the carrots
772
00:46:34,160 --> 00:46:37,760
good to be getting on with..
773
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:42,040
[shreaks]
774
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:43,160
Mouse!
775
00:46:43,160 --> 00:46:44,000
Mouse, mouse.
776
00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:45,000
What was that?
777
00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:48,280
Mouse, mouse?
778
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:49,040
Mouse.
779
00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:53,360
Where was it?
780
00:46:53,360 --> 00:46:54,280
There, there.
781
00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:55,760
Where was it sort of over here?
782
00:46:55,760 --> 00:46:57,760
No, right there!
783
00:46:57,760 --> 00:46:59,560
They've got sort of little nashers
784
00:46:59,560 --> 00:47:00,480
Little teeth
785
00:47:00,480 --> 00:47:01,240
Catch it.
786
00:47:01,240 --> 00:47:09,320
And I think that don't know about the South of England but sometimes if they latch onto you
787
00:47:09,320 --> 00:47:11,800
their jaws just lock
788
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:13,760
and they don't let go until the bone is..
789
00:47:13,760 --> 00:47:16,320
Faster, faster, faster!
790
00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:18,920
..but I think that's just.. I think I can see him so...
791
00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:40,280
He was there but I saw him run so I sort of came in
792
00:47:40,280 --> 00:47:45,080
and hit him on the head a few times with the broom so I think he
793
00:47:45,080 --> 00:47:48,920
.....he should be gone
794
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:52,520
One would.. well one would hope that he's...
795
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:54,480
[screams]
796
00:47:54,480 --> 00:47:55,720
Mama!
797
00:47:59,720 --> 00:48:01,440
I've got him this time
798
00:48:01,720 --> 00:48:02,800
There, there, there it is.
799
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:04,160
In the corner.
800
00:48:07,200 --> 00:48:08,920
exactly the same place as last time
801
00:48:08,920 --> 00:48:10,440
[thump thump thump]
802
00:49:00,040 --> 00:49:01,200
You know...
803
00:49:02,320 --> 00:49:05,120
They say there is an ideal partner...
804
00:49:05,680 --> 00:49:07,240
...and an ideal relationship.
805
00:49:07,240 --> 00:49:09,040
The ideal partner...
806
00:49:09,040 --> 00:49:12,160
...is often very attractive, intriguing, and...
807
00:49:12,840 --> 00:49:14,640
...exciting.
808
00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:16,760
But it doesn't last long.
809
00:49:17,680 --> 00:49:19,640
They'll leave you...
810
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:22,080
...for no reason.
811
00:49:22,080 --> 00:49:24,360
But the ideal relationship...
812
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:26,840
...can sometimes be boring...
813
00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:29,760
...and predictable.
814
00:49:30,720 --> 00:49:32,400
At least the partner...
815
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:34,520
...will be on your side...
816
00:49:35,920 --> 00:49:38,520
...and he genuinely wants the best for you.
817
00:49:39,680 --> 00:49:43,840
You know, the ideal partner...is like...
818
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:45,240
...candy.
819
00:49:45,720 --> 00:49:49,600
While the ideal relationship
is like broccoli.
820
00:49:50,320 --> 00:49:51,880
You understand?
821
00:50:23,280 --> 00:50:24,280
[sleep grunt]
822
00:50:32,520 --> 00:50:33,520
Lana?
823
00:50:39,080 --> 00:50:40,080
Lana?
824
00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:48,720
Did you lose your ring?
825
00:50:55,160 --> 00:51:01,400
I sometimes lose it actually sometimes I have it on the bedside table and...
826
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:06,080
on the side by the side of the bed and it falls into the gap
827
00:51:06,080 --> 00:51:10,880
that's understandable I think sometimes... yeah..
828
00:51:10,880 --> 00:51:15,000
that's normal or it falls between the two mattresses
829
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:19,840
a friend sometimes he has sort of two bits of mattresses because he has two single..
830
00:52:05,240 --> 00:52:07,800
So you say what's the time?
831
00:52:07,800 --> 00:52:08,560
What's the time?
832
00:52:08,560 --> 00:52:09,440
correct
833
00:52:09,440 --> 00:52:11,080
Mr Wolf
834
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:15,560
Mr Wolf
and altogether.. what's the time Mr Wolf
835
00:52:15,680 --> 00:52:17,280
What's the time Mr Wolf
836
00:52:17,280 --> 00:52:18,120
very good
837
00:52:18,720 --> 00:52:20,640
whenever you're ready
838
00:52:21,280 --> 00:52:22,600
What's the time Mr Wolf
839
00:52:22,600 --> 00:52:24,720
it's two o'clock
840
00:52:29,400 --> 00:52:33,520
okay and then you have to tell me what the time is again say "what's the time Mr Wolf?"
841
00:52:33,520 --> 00:52:35,000
What's the time Mr Wolf?
842
00:52:35,000 --> 00:52:37,360
Two o'clock again
843
00:52:37,360 --> 00:52:39,360
two o'clock again...
844
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:41,040
Say what's the time Mr Wolf
845
00:52:41,040 --> 00:52:42,480
What's the time Mr Wolf?
846
00:52:43,360 --> 00:52:46,400
Dinner time!
847
00:53:00,880 --> 00:53:07,760
We'll go again because it was a bit rusty the first time
848
00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:10,960
so we'll go again because it takes some time to get used to it
849
00:53:10,960 --> 00:53:12,160
wait for Ivan
850
00:53:12,160 --> 00:53:19,240
Very good, very good at the game. For a beginner... thumbs up
851
00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:21,960
Hey Alex, oi!
852
00:53:24,360 --> 00:53:26,800
Did he say something about a wedding?
853
00:53:26,800 --> 00:53:29,440
Yes he said the 13th.
854
00:53:29,440 --> 00:53:32,720
Since you're here and Ivan is here...
855
00:53:32,720 --> 00:53:36,520
...he's going to organise the wedding.
856
00:53:36,520 --> 00:53:39,360
But he hasn't bought anything yet?
857
00:53:39,360 --> 00:53:40,560
Alex?
858
00:53:41,760 --> 00:53:49,200
Remember what were you saying Natalie I think you were saying an arch
859
00:53:49,200 --> 00:53:52,520
have an arch and just sort of decorate it remember you were saying
860
00:53:52,520 --> 00:53:54,800
that was quite an interesting idea
861
00:53:54,800 --> 00:53:56,040
Arch?
862
00:53:56,040 --> 00:53:58,040
Alex, did you really buy an arch?
What did I suggest? Arch?
863
00:53:58,040 --> 00:54:00,000
I didn't talk about any arch...
864
00:54:00,440 --> 00:54:02,200
Alex, did you really?
865
00:54:03,400 --> 00:54:04,840
The priest...
866
00:54:05,200 --> 00:54:07,440
...he'll know where to stand regardless.
867
00:54:07,440 --> 00:54:08,840
We'll show him.
868
00:54:09,040 --> 00:54:11,280
We'll tell him stand here...
869
00:54:11,360 --> 00:54:12,200
...priest!
870
00:54:13,680 --> 00:54:17,360
Did you get that? The priest will know where to stand
871
00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:19,080
you don't... we'll show him
872
00:54:19,080 --> 00:54:23,640
Of course he'll know where to stand.. was Natalie's idea
873
00:54:23,640 --> 00:54:29,200
well of course he'll know he's done weddings before.. simple, we'll keep it as simple as possible
874
00:54:29,200 --> 00:54:30,200
Alex?
875
00:54:30,320 --> 00:54:32,080
So, what else?
876
00:54:32,160 --> 00:54:33,400
What else?
877
00:54:33,960 --> 00:54:35,760
What else did you order?
878
00:54:36,320 --> 00:54:37,480
Translate for him.
879
00:54:37,720 --> 00:54:38,720
Anything else?
880
00:54:43,400 --> 00:54:44,520
Yes, no?
881
00:54:45,280 --> 00:54:46,040
Alex?
882
00:54:46,360 --> 00:54:46,960
No.
883
00:54:48,120 --> 00:54:49,520
Wedding dress?
884
00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:50,960
No.
No.
885
00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:52,160
I won't wear it.
886
00:54:52,200 --> 00:54:53,840
You understand?
Do you know 'net'?
887
00:54:55,080 --> 00:54:56,160
Alex listen.
888
00:54:56,160 --> 00:54:57,120
Listen.
889
00:54:57,120 --> 00:54:58,360
Listen.
890
00:54:58,360 --> 00:54:59,160
Alex.
891
00:54:59,160 --> 00:55:02,440
If you want a wedding dress...
892
00:55:02,640 --> 00:55:06,120
then you...can be the bride.
893
00:55:06,600 --> 00:55:10,680
If you want the wedding dress then you're going to be the bride
894
00:55:11,440 --> 00:55:13,000
I'm the bride!
895
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:14,200
You're the bride
896
00:55:14,200 --> 00:55:15,600
there we go
You'll be...
897
00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:16,640
...the bride.
898
00:55:16,640 --> 00:55:17,640
because I'm the bride..
899
00:55:19,160 --> 00:55:23,040
You can wear a t-shirt, we can wear t-shirts... no dresses
900
00:55:23,040 --> 00:55:24,440
just t-shirt
901
00:55:24,440 --> 00:55:27,640
and you can wear.. in fact I can just wear a t-shirt
902
00:55:27,640 --> 00:55:29,680
just like this I'll wear this
903
00:55:29,680 --> 00:55:32,320
short sleeved.. it's a nice day...
904
00:55:40,440 --> 00:55:44,640
[ It's so important to make someone happy ]
905
00:55:44,640 --> 00:55:48,880
[ Make just one someobody happy ]
906
00:55:48,880 --> 00:55:52,720
[ Make just one heart to heart you... ]
907
00:55:52,720 --> 00:55:56,800
[...you care for ]
908
00:55:56,800 --> 00:56:01,200
[A smile that cheers you]
909
00:56:01,200 --> 00:56:05,160
[A face that lights when near you]
910
00:56:05,160 --> 00:56:11,240
[Then love could possibly find you... ]
911
00:56:11,240 --> 00:56:12,960
[doorbell rings]
912
00:56:25,320 --> 00:56:26,320
[door closes]
913
00:56:41,200 --> 00:56:43,360
Look what your friend's gone and done.
914
00:56:44,120 --> 00:56:45,560
I told him...
915
00:56:45,600 --> 00:56:49,120
...no dress, no dress, no.
916
00:56:49,280 --> 00:56:50,840
And this is what he bought.
917
00:56:50,880 --> 00:56:51,920
What is this?
918
00:56:58,480 --> 00:56:59,440
Ivan?
919
00:56:59,840 --> 00:57:01,880
Let's go.
920
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:05,600
[door slams]
921
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:09,640
Ta-da!
922
00:58:27,600 --> 00:58:28,320
Oh, shit.
923
00:58:30,200 --> 00:58:31,800
What are you doing here?
924
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:33,120
I recognise you.
925
00:58:34,000 --> 00:58:36,520
What, are you following me everywhere?
926
00:58:36,840 --> 00:58:38,200
I'm going to...
927
00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:39,880
...break your camera.
928
00:58:39,960 --> 00:58:41,880
Get out of here!
929
00:58:45,280 --> 00:58:47,120
Actually, you know what?
930
00:58:48,920 --> 00:58:50,600
Drive me...
931
00:58:50,840 --> 00:58:52,080
...like a taxi.
932
00:58:52,360 --> 00:58:53,240
Drive...
933
00:58:53,320 --> 00:58:54,240
...me.
934
00:58:54,360 --> 00:58:55,680
Drive...
935
00:58:56,080 --> 00:58:57,600
...Drive me!
936
00:59:09,040 --> 00:59:12,240
well er.... no one's answering
937
00:59:12,240 --> 00:59:13,240
erm...
938
00:59:14,760 --> 00:59:15,760
I mean I...
939
00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:18,960
I guess I should've told her about the surprise party
940
00:59:21,440 --> 00:59:23,680
that's a bit annoying really
941
00:59:31,120 --> 00:59:33,800
Stop, stop stop!
942
01:00:04,880 --> 01:00:06,240
Open the door!
943
01:00:06,240 --> 01:00:09,680
I said open the door!
944
01:00:09,960 --> 01:00:11,760
Oh it’s you!
945
01:00:11,760 --> 01:00:17,440
You lied to me...you're married?
Keep your voice down, I'll get you a taxi.
946
01:00:17,440 --> 01:00:19,160
Does she even know?
947
01:00:19,160 --> 01:00:20,160
Let go of me!
948
01:00:20,160 --> 01:00:21,240
Let go of me!
I'll call you a taxi...I'll call you a taxi.
949
01:00:21,240 --> 01:00:22,320
What taxi?
950
01:00:22,520 --> 01:00:24,480
Will you let go?
How could you bring Ivan with you?
951
01:00:24,480 --> 01:00:25,600
Let go of me!
952
01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:29,200
You'd better take your hands off me or else.
953
01:00:29,200 --> 01:00:32,720
Just get in the car... get in the car
954
01:00:35,720 --> 01:00:38,520
You really are an asshole you know?
Just get in the car
955
01:00:38,520 --> 01:00:40,160
Why?
Get in the car..
956
01:00:42,240 --> 01:00:46,680
Listen go home get over it, I never loved you okay?
957
01:00:46,680 --> 01:00:49,960
And don't show up like this or I'll call the police
958
01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:52,200
Asshole!
959
01:00:55,360 --> 01:00:57,160
Asshole.
960
01:00:57,440 --> 01:01:00,320
Asshole. Asshole. Asshole.
961
01:01:00,680 --> 01:01:01,920
Asshole.
962
01:01:01,920 --> 01:01:03,240
Asshole.
963
01:01:04,040 --> 01:01:05,080
Asshole.
964
01:01:05,080 --> 01:01:06,000
Asshole.
965
01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:07,520
Asshole.
966
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:08,480
Asshole.
967
01:01:08,480 --> 01:01:09,680
Asshole.
968
01:01:23,120 --> 01:01:24,440
Are you okay?
969
01:01:41,680 --> 01:01:45,480
Ladies and gentlemen,
I’d like to welcome you all.
970
01:01:45,480 --> 01:01:48,160
What a beautiful celebration.
971
01:01:48,200 --> 01:01:50,320
A family occasion.
972
01:01:50,320 --> 01:01:54,000
Can somebody call the police? How come you never invited us
to this special family gathering?
973
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:57,720
[Ivan] take whatever you want.
Get off me!
Come on!
974
01:01:57,720 --> 01:02:01,080
I would like to introduce myself.
975
01:02:01,080 --> 01:02:03,160
I'm the mistress...
976
01:02:03,160 --> 01:02:06,320
...and this is the wife.
977
01:02:06,320 --> 01:02:07,680
Prostitute.
978
01:02:07,800 --> 01:02:10,120
I am the prostitute?
979
01:02:10,280 --> 01:02:11,640
I am?
980
01:02:13,240 --> 01:02:14,240
[Text message tone]
981
01:02:19,200 --> 01:02:20,440
Oh it's a text from Ivan..
982
01:02:22,280 --> 01:02:23,280
[Text message tone]
983
01:02:24,520 --> 01:02:25,520
[shouts] I got.. I got..
984
01:02:25,760 --> 01:02:27,560
[shouts] I got a text from Ivan!
985
01:02:27,880 --> 01:02:29,760
A text from Ivan!
986
01:02:29,760 --> 01:02:30,520
[Text message tone]
987
01:03:09,120 --> 01:03:12,040
Well there's no answer
988
01:03:12,040 --> 01:03:15,840
He says he needs me somewhere
989
01:03:15,840 --> 01:03:18,200
He doesn't ever text me either
990
01:03:18,200 --> 01:03:20,120
starting to get worried now
991
01:03:20,480 --> 01:03:24,840
Actually Jim from the other crew he's with her now
992
01:03:25,240 --> 01:03:29,880
How do you guys always sort of get around so quickly?
993
01:03:29,880 --> 01:03:30,760
All over the place
994
01:03:30,760 --> 01:03:31,760
Cars.
995
01:03:31,760 --> 01:03:34,720
Shouldn't we get going?
996
01:03:34,720 --> 01:03:36,280
Yes.. yea.. well
997
01:03:36,280 --> 01:03:38,480
Tell you what Natalie can drive me
998
01:03:38,480 --> 01:03:40,440
So yea, I'll need to get going now, yea..
999
01:03:43,720 --> 01:03:46,440
What are you doing?
1000
01:03:48,080 --> 01:03:50,160
There's a door here..
1001
01:03:50,160 --> 01:03:52,240
Yeah I know that I was trying to be soft
1002
01:03:58,520 --> 01:04:01,280
Woah woah woah what's going on?
Calm down.
1003
01:04:01,280 --> 01:04:03,760
Let go of my son. Let go of my son!
And who are you?
1004
01:04:03,760 --> 01:04:05,640
and what the hell are all these cameras for?
1005
01:04:05,640 --> 01:04:09,160
Oh thank god you're here.
I'm Alex Clough
It was a rhetorical question
1006
01:04:09,280 --> 01:04:11,240
I can't believe you actually answered
1007
01:04:11,240 --> 01:04:13,400
Get the f*** out of my house all of you
He's crazy you know.
1008
01:04:13,400 --> 01:04:15,720
I don't want to see you here when I get back
1009
01:04:16,120 --> 01:04:17,120
Is that clear?
1010
01:04:19,560 --> 01:04:20,560
Is that clear?
1011
01:04:21,080 --> 01:04:22,800
Yep
Good.
1012
01:04:25,400 --> 01:04:26,320
Are you okay?
1013
01:04:26,320 --> 01:04:30,400
Did he upset you?
1014
01:04:37,320 --> 01:04:38,320
Ivan
1015
01:04:39,120 --> 01:04:40,080
let's go
1016
01:04:40,080 --> 01:04:42,840
excuse me..
1017
01:05:01,640 --> 01:05:02,800
Say you're sorry
1018
01:05:03,920 --> 01:05:05,880
Are you f***ing stupid?
1019
01:05:06,600 --> 01:05:07,880
Apologise to Ivan
1020
01:05:09,000 --> 01:05:10,440
you can't do that to a child
1021
01:05:10,600 --> 01:05:12,160
especially not on his Birthday
1022
01:05:12,200 --> 01:05:13,560
or what?
1023
01:05:13,840 --> 01:05:15,120
What are you gonna do?
1024
01:05:22,920 --> 01:05:24,240
Look!
1025
01:05:29,200 --> 01:05:33,120
It took my three days to bake that cake
1026
01:05:33,120 --> 01:05:35,360
Oh I’ll show you...
1027
01:05:35,360 --> 01:05:38,360
...what a cake!
1028
01:05:38,360 --> 01:05:41,040
You’ll get it!
1029
01:05:41,040 --> 01:05:43,840
You old goat!
Old goat!
1030
01:05:43,880 --> 01:05:45,320
Old goat!
1031
01:05:53,680 --> 01:05:55,880
Let this be a lesson to everyone
1032
01:06:02,320 --> 01:06:04,240
All of you go!
1033
01:06:04,560 --> 01:06:09,240
Go, go, leave it!
1034
01:06:10,480 --> 01:06:13,240
Just get out! Get out!
1035
01:06:14,400 --> 01:06:15,480
What's going on?
1036
01:06:15,480 --> 01:06:17,560
It's not at all how it looks...
Natalie please.. what's going on?
1037
01:06:17,560 --> 01:06:20,440
Alex listen I should have told you sooner...
1038
01:06:20,440 --> 01:06:22,800
...but I couldn't because we didn't have the time.
1039
01:06:22,800 --> 01:06:24,280
I didn't even know how to do it.
Natalie please can you translate?
1040
01:06:24,280 --> 01:06:26,640
Alex it’s not at all what you think.
1041
01:06:26,720 --> 01:06:28,520
Oh please, Natasha help me!
1042
01:06:28,520 --> 01:06:30,240
Lana what do you want me to say?
1043
01:06:30,240 --> 01:06:32,080
Do you want me to tell him everything?
1044
01:06:33,120 --> 01:06:34,120
Natalie..
1045
01:06:34,640 --> 01:06:36,160
please tell me what's going on, please...
1046
01:06:37,800 --> 01:06:42,440
Right Alex this guy Jasper she's been seeing him on and off
1047
01:06:42,440 --> 01:06:45,080
before you two started chatting
1048
01:06:45,440 --> 01:06:48,360
but she broke up with him after she met you
1049
01:06:48,360 --> 01:06:50,520
so it's done now, it's finished.
1050
01:06:50,520 --> 01:06:51,840
No, before I met him.
1051
01:06:51,840 --> 01:06:54,440
no, before she met you
1052
01:06:54,640 --> 01:06:56,080
Alex, listen to me.
1053
01:06:56,120 --> 01:06:57,720
We broke up... Alex listen.
1054
01:06:57,720 --> 01:06:58,640
They broke up before she met you
1055
01:06:58,640 --> 01:07:01,920
We broke up before I met you.
1056
01:07:01,920 --> 01:07:06,040
Then I came here and he started texting me.
Then she came here he started texting her
1057
01:07:06,040 --> 01:07:09,560
Then he asked me to meet him in a car park.
Then he took her to a car park
1058
01:07:09,560 --> 01:07:12,360
And then...and then we went to McDonald's.
the other night..
1059
01:07:12,360 --> 01:07:16,720
And then, I don't know...
I just came here because he didn't show.
they wanted to see where they stand. Anyway Alex..
1060
01:07:16,760 --> 01:07:18,440
Understand?
Don't listen, Alex listen listen listen
1061
01:07:18,440 --> 01:07:22,440
Alex...I...I...I don't even love him.
It's done now it's done now
1062
01:07:22,480 --> 01:07:24,000
Alex.
Woah, hey..
1063
01:07:24,640 --> 01:07:26,440
Breathe.. don't do that
1064
01:07:26,440 --> 01:07:27,440
Alex.
1065
01:07:27,440 --> 01:07:28,720
Don't do the heavy breathing
1066
01:07:28,720 --> 01:07:30,040
Alex let's just relax alright
1067
01:07:30,760 --> 01:07:32,320
Let's go home.
1068
01:07:32,320 --> 01:07:33,680
Just breathe normally
1069
01:07:33,680 --> 01:07:34,640
Let’s all just go home.
1070
01:07:34,640 --> 01:07:35,800
Yeah let's all just go home
1071
01:07:35,800 --> 01:07:36,880
It's Ivan's birthday.
1072
01:07:36,880 --> 01:07:38,280
Let's just have some tea.
1073
01:07:38,320 --> 01:07:39,440
I'll explain everything.
1074
01:07:39,440 --> 01:07:42,320
Alex, I haven’t loved him for a long time.
1075
01:07:42,320 --> 01:07:44,200
He’s not even a nice guy.
1076
01:07:44,360 --> 01:07:45,440
Tell him.
1077
01:07:45,440 --> 01:07:47,360
Yeah, Alex...
1078
01:07:47,360 --> 01:07:49,440
it's over now it's finished
1079
01:07:49,840 --> 01:07:50,360
right?
1080
01:07:50,360 --> 01:07:51,800
you're here
1081
01:07:52,040 --> 01:07:53,680
it's done now, you're a good man
1082
01:07:54,040 --> 01:07:55,840
let's just go home
1083
01:08:05,160 --> 01:08:06,000
[Ivan sneezes]
1084
01:08:06,920 --> 01:08:07,920
Bless you Ivan
1085
01:08:15,040 --> 01:08:18,040
He didn't even ask her anything
1086
01:08:18,040 --> 01:08:20,720
It's just like..
1087
01:08:20,720 --> 01:08:23,760
he's a bit fixated in some..
1088
01:08:24,640 --> 01:08:25,920
...weird
1089
01:08:25,920 --> 01:08:28,040
delusional pattern of
1090
01:08:28,040 --> 01:08:29,880
how things are supposed to go
1091
01:08:30,840 --> 01:08:31,480
no?
1092
01:08:33,320 --> 01:08:34,600
It's a bit strange
1093
01:08:34,600 --> 01:08:35,760
I'm not correcting him
1094
01:08:35,760 --> 01:08:39,760
I just think he's I mean at the end of the day he's a good guy
1095
01:08:42,640 --> 01:08:45,080
I mean he's f****d up a little bit
1096
01:10:51,280 --> 01:10:55,960
Jesus, aren't you bored already?
Why don't you just go to bed?
1097
01:10:57,360 --> 01:10:58,760
Come on.
1098
01:10:58,760 --> 01:11:00,760
Let's go in.
1099
01:14:07,760 --> 01:14:10,480
How did you find me?
1100
01:14:13,560 --> 01:14:17,360
I'm sorry, Alex.
1101
01:14:18,480 --> 01:14:22,960
I'm not very good with words
1102
01:14:22,960 --> 01:14:28,680
so I wrote a poem...
1103
01:14:28,840 --> 01:14:31,600
to express my feelings.
1104
01:14:36,320 --> 01:14:38,440
Lana
1105
01:14:39,640 --> 01:14:42,480
when my eyes first met yours
1106
01:14:44,040 --> 01:14:46,160
on my computer screen
1107
01:14:46,600 --> 01:14:48,320
I looked at you
1108
01:14:49,080 --> 01:14:50,840
and you looked at me
1109
01:14:51,600 --> 01:14:54,600
with nothing in between
1110
01:14:58,160 --> 01:15:00,120
then you agreed to be my wife
1111
01:15:01,840 --> 01:15:03,920
and come to live with me
1112
01:15:04,680 --> 01:15:08,440
so you set off from distant lands
1113
01:15:10,720 --> 01:15:12,800
across a distant sea
1114
01:15:13,400 --> 01:15:16,760
[passing driver swears]
1115
01:15:16,760 --> 01:15:22,560
I know that you came on aero-flight but I always imagined it as a boat
1116
01:15:22,560 --> 01:15:26,320
sort of more romantic
1117
01:15:27,080 --> 01:15:31,120
and you were at the front like Kate Winslet
1118
01:15:31,120 --> 01:15:33,240
except I wasn't there
1119
01:15:35,840 --> 01:15:41,080
I realise I might have been too hasty with my love
1120
01:15:41,720 --> 01:15:48,680
I should have guessed that you were not so sure of the above
1121
01:15:49,400 --> 01:15:53,960
but I still hope you'd be with me
1122
01:15:54,440 --> 01:15:57,280
and we would build a home
1123
01:15:57,440 --> 01:15:59,960
but then you
1124
01:16:03,480 --> 01:16:06,920
then you stabbed my dreams in the back
1125
01:16:06,920 --> 01:16:11,600
when you met your ex in some stupid car park
1126
01:16:16,800 --> 01:16:17,600
Alex.
1127
01:16:17,600 --> 01:16:19,400
Alex, where are you going?
1128
01:16:20,600 --> 01:16:23,280
Alex, wait!
1129
01:16:40,640 --> 01:16:43,160
When I was young other kids
1130
01:16:43,160 --> 01:16:46,800
used to have posters of Superman and Rocket on their wall
1131
01:16:48,400 --> 01:16:51,000
I had Hugh Grant and Tom Hanks
1132
01:16:51,760 --> 01:16:54,760
I just wanted to be that guy in the rom-coms
1133
01:16:55,560 --> 01:16:57,600
but then I realised
1134
01:16:57,800 --> 01:16:59,880
those guys aren't even that guy
1135
01:17:03,280 --> 01:17:06,720
Did she betray me and have a secret boyfriend the whole time?
1136
01:17:07,320 --> 01:17:09,040
Absolutely, yeah.
1137
01:17:09,840 --> 01:17:13,760
Did it crush my heart into a hundred pieces? Yeh.
1138
01:17:14,480 --> 01:17:16,760
but even with all the confusion
1139
01:17:16,760 --> 01:17:18,320
and the misunderstandings
1140
01:17:18,440 --> 01:17:21,120
and the secret boyfriends and kids
1141
01:17:21,120 --> 01:17:22,640
and the shouting and
1142
01:17:22,960 --> 01:17:25,240
the not understanding most of what she said
1143
01:17:25,240 --> 01:17:26,920
even in spite of all that
1144
01:17:27,320 --> 01:17:29,520
I'd rather have experienced something real
1145
01:17:30,160 --> 01:17:33,960
if looking for love leads you to reciting poetry
1146
01:17:33,960 --> 01:17:35,000
to a beautiful woman
1147
01:17:35,000 --> 01:17:36,600
badly in your pants
1148
01:17:36,920 --> 01:17:40,120
in the middle of the city at three o'clock in the morning
1149
01:17:40,120 --> 01:17:40,920
you know..
1150
01:17:41,840 --> 01:17:43,560
maybe you've done something right?
1151
01:18:31,280 --> 01:18:34,640
Don't have your sights set too high
1152
01:18:34,640 --> 01:18:35,400
No
1153
01:18:35,400 --> 01:18:38,080
because if you have your sights set too high
1154
01:18:38,080 --> 01:18:40,360
then I don't think you'll find anything
1155
01:18:40,880 --> 01:18:42,640
But you'll know when it happens
1156
01:18:43,440 --> 01:18:45,520
I would say the most cliché thing ever but
1157
01:18:45,520 --> 01:18:48,440
but love, relationship is actually like a designer clothe
1158
01:18:48,560 --> 01:18:50,120
if it doesn't really fit you
1159
01:18:50,600 --> 01:18:51,840
it's a disaster
1160
01:18:52,760 --> 01:18:54,560
Whatever it is just talk about it
1161
01:18:54,560 --> 01:18:56,880
And if you can't talk about it go to therapy
1162
01:18:58,080 --> 01:18:59,160
[He laughs]
Cause that helps
1163
01:18:59,560 --> 01:19:00,560
You laugh!!?
1164
01:19:01,000 --> 01:19:02,440
Yeah we are still together
1165
01:19:03,360 --> 01:19:06,040
I mean you can't afford a divorce can you?
1166
01:19:06,040 --> 01:19:08,840
I couldn't afford a divorce so that's...
1167
01:19:08,840 --> 01:19:10,240
Yes that's another thing
1168
01:19:10,240 --> 01:19:10,720
yea..
1169
01:20:21,040 --> 01:20:23,160
What's her name your sister?
What? Hmm?
1170
01:20:23,200 --> 01:20:24,680
Your sister?
1171
01:20:24,960 --> 01:20:26,440
Well erm.. .my sister well..
1172
01:20:26,440 --> 01:20:28,000
is.. erm... Anna
1173
01:20:28,000 --> 01:20:30,840
Anna Barbara
1174
01:20:31,560 --> 01:20:35,320
Anna Barbara.. which one sorry both or?
Sorry?
1175
01:20:36,680 --> 01:20:37,840
Oh I see erm..
1176
01:20:38,640 --> 01:20:41,640
Well its quite a complicated story..
1177
01:20:41,640 --> 01:20:44,120
..originally they were born sort of er..
1178
01:20:44,120 --> 01:20:45,120
sort of..
1179
01:20:45,120 --> 01:20:46,720
siamese
1180
01:20:46,720 --> 01:20:48,360
conjoined twins
1181
01:20:48,360 --> 01:20:50,280
Anna was obviously fully formed
1182
01:20:50,280 --> 01:20:51,280
whereas... [laughter]
1183
01:20:51,280 --> 01:20:57,840
[laughing]
1184
01:20:58,120 --> 01:21:00,800
we'll get it we'll get it we'll get it...
1185
01:21:00,800 --> 01:21:05,240
Barbara was just the...
1186
01:21:05,240 --> 01:21:07,440
[director] I'm sorry..
1187
01:21:07,440 --> 01:21:11,120
so it's quite a complicated story because obviously what
1188
01:21:11,120 --> 01:21:13,080
I don't know if you know but they were born
1189
01:21:13,080 --> 01:21:14,080
erm...
1190
01:21:15,760 --> 01:21:17,440
[laughter]
1191
01:21:17,440 --> 01:21:21,680
Well it's a complicated story with Anna Barbara obviously because they were born...
1192
01:21:21,680 --> 01:21:23,000
siamese..
1193
01:21:23,000 --> 01:21:24,880
conjoined twins I think it was
1194
01:21:24,880 --> 01:21:26,720
so obviously Anna was fully formed
1195
01:21:26,760 --> 01:21:29,560
[laughter]
1196
01:21:29,560 --> 01:21:31,200
[Director] I'm sorry..
1197
01:21:32,840 --> 01:21:35,600
Anna was fully formed...
1198
01:21:36,160 --> 01:21:39,040
okay I'll go from Anna was fully formed..
1199
01:21:41,480 --> 01:21:49,240
[laughter]
1200
01:21:49,520 --> 01:21:52,600
Yeah I'll do that..
[director] Anna was fully formed
1201
01:21:52,600 --> 01:21:55,240
[director] and Barbara..
and Barbara was just sort of..
1202
01:21:56,600 --> 01:21:58,240
Okay I'm gonna get this one
1203
01:21:59,680 --> 01:22:02,680
Well it's quite a complicated story cause..
1204
01:22:02,680 --> 01:22:05,160
Anna was fully... fully formed... okay
1205
01:22:05,520 --> 01:22:10,280
it's quite a complicated story because actually Anna was actually fully formed..
1206
01:22:10,280 --> 01:22:11,240
at birth..
1207
01:22:11,240 --> 01:22:13,520
however Barbara was
1208
01:22:14,680 --> 01:22:15,880
unfortunately just a head
1209
01:22:15,880 --> 01:22:20,840
[laughter]
1210
01:22:20,840 --> 01:22:24,520
Well sort of siamese conjoined twins.. erm..
1211
01:22:24,520 --> 01:22:27,560
..when they were born.. anyway, so..
1212
01:22:27,560 --> 01:22:30,040
..Anna, born fully formed
1213
01:22:30,040 --> 01:22:34,960
..but unfortunately Barbara was simply a head..
1214
01:22:35,800 --> 01:22:39,840
and it's rather unfortunate because..
1215
01:22:39,840 --> 01:22:42,240
.. first few weeks of birth..
1216
01:22:42,240 --> 01:22:44,320
both survived excellently..
1217
01:22:44,320 --> 01:22:48,320
however Barbara became ever so slowly absorbed
1218
01:22:48,320 --> 01:22:51,360
first the mouth sort of disappeared
1219
01:22:51,360 --> 01:22:53,200
sort of elongated..
1220
01:22:53,200 --> 01:22:54,680
..and then the nostrils they sort of..
1221
01:22:54,680 --> 01:22:55,680
went.
1222
01:22:55,680 --> 01:22:58,680
anyway so she ended up sort of..
1223
01:22:59,080 --> 01:23:01,440
..just a little face..
78534
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.