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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:46,054 --> 00:00:46,054 THE CORRIDORS OF TIME 2 00:00:50,734 --> 00:00:53,934 In the year 1123, men were valiant. 3 00:00:54,174 --> 00:00:56,854 wizards ruled over the forests 4 00:00:57,094 --> 00:01:01,014 with magic spells, potions and remedies. 5 00:01:01,254 --> 00:01:04,654 Godefroy, Count of Montmirail, returned from war 6 00:01:04,894 --> 00:01:07,374 with his squire, Jacquasse the Crass. 7 00:01:07,774 --> 00:01:11,134 He rushed to his betrothed, sweet Frenegonde. 8 00:01:12,694 --> 00:01:15,214 Bewitched by a wicked witch, 9 00:01:15,454 --> 00:01:18,854 he mistook Frenegonde's father for a bear 10 00:01:19,094 --> 00:01:21,214 and slew him with an arrow. 11 00:01:22,334 --> 00:01:27,494 Deserted by Frenegonde, Godefroy consulted the wizard Eusabius, 12 00:01:27,734 --> 00:01:31,054 who tried sending Godefroy through the Corridors of Time 13 00:01:31,294 --> 00:01:33,534 to the moment before the accident. 14 00:01:33,774 --> 00:01:35,934 But the wizard goofed. 15 00:01:36,174 --> 00:01:39,454 He thrust our heroes into the 20th century. 16 00:01:40,334 --> 00:01:42,334 The psychos! 17 00:01:42,574 --> 00:01:44,094 Look at the bums! 18 00:01:44,334 --> 00:01:48,094 Godefroy met his descendant, Beatrice de Montmirail. 19 00:01:48,334 --> 00:01:51,174 she mistook him for her cousin Hubert, 20 00:01:51,494 --> 00:01:53,494 who has the ancestral nose. 21 00:01:53,774 --> 00:01:56,174 But Jacquart, Jacquasse' descendant, 22 00:01:56,414 --> 00:01:58,654 denied any link with such an oaf. 23 00:01:59,134 --> 00:02:01,654 Jacquasse and Godefroy met Ginette, 24 00:02:01,894 --> 00:02:04,534 a hobo who mistook them for stuntmen. 25 00:02:05,414 --> 00:02:09,894 But Beatrice wrongly assumed that Ginette also came 26 00:02:10,134 --> 00:02:11,814 from the Middle Ages. 27 00:02:12,054 --> 00:02:15,334 Before Godefroy returned to the past, 28 00:02:15,574 --> 00:02:19,534 he locked up sergeant Gibbon and sedated him. 29 00:02:20,094 --> 00:02:25,134 He managed to prevent his future father-in-law's death. 30 00:02:26,654 --> 00:02:28,694 But Jacquasse did something dumb. 31 00:02:28,934 --> 00:02:30,974 He stole the Duke'sjewels 32 00:02:31,214 --> 00:02:34,294 and hid them in a statue. 33 00:02:34,694 --> 00:02:36,894 By taking them into the future, 34 00:02:37,134 --> 00:02:40,694 and sending Jacquart back to the past 35 00:02:40,934 --> 00:02:45,094 in the coat Ginette had bought for him, 36 00:02:46,334 --> 00:02:48,414 Jacquasse the Crass has left 37 00:02:48,654 --> 00:02:51,854 the Corridors of Time wide open. 38 00:02:55,014 --> 00:02:56,374 Out of my way! 39 00:03:04,174 --> 00:03:07,134 Cousin Hubert! what's going on here? 40 00:03:08,974 --> 00:03:12,014 where the hell am I? 41 00:03:15,854 --> 00:03:19,454 sire! The Crass obeys you not. He flees! 42 00:03:22,694 --> 00:03:25,214 Let me drag him back by his ball-sack. 43 00:03:25,454 --> 00:03:27,974 He is thrilled to be home. 44 00:03:28,214 --> 00:03:30,014 Let him drink the tavern dry. 45 00:03:30,254 --> 00:03:32,014 He'll return soon after. 46 00:03:46,054 --> 00:03:48,734 No network! what a great buy! 47 00:03:50,654 --> 00:03:53,854 It's ice-cold here! 48 00:04:22,134 --> 00:04:24,974 Daughter, you will not wed Count Godefroy. 49 00:04:25,494 --> 00:04:27,534 His subjects are thieves. 50 00:04:27,854 --> 00:04:29,094 Jewel thieves! 51 00:04:29,894 --> 00:04:31,134 How can it be? 52 00:04:31,374 --> 00:04:33,054 I had them this morning. 53 00:04:33,294 --> 00:04:35,934 Now they're gone, as if by magic! 54 00:04:36,374 --> 00:04:38,334 A spell was cast on me! 55 00:04:38,574 --> 00:04:43,254 Relax thyself. I will investigate. If thief there be, he will hang! 56 00:04:44,134 --> 00:04:47,334 Among the stolen family jewels is our Holy Relic. 57 00:04:47,574 --> 00:04:48,974 The sacred tooth! 58 00:04:49,574 --> 00:04:53,614 All that remained of saint Rolande after Caesar's lions devoured her. 59 00:04:53,854 --> 00:04:55,254 It brings fertility! 60 00:04:55,814 --> 00:04:57,214 woe to my daughter 61 00:04:57,494 --> 00:04:59,894 if she is without it at her wedding! 62 00:05:00,134 --> 00:05:01,654 she will be sterile! 63 00:05:03,614 --> 00:05:08,334 I vow to find the sacred tooth, even if Hell awaits me! 64 00:05:08,654 --> 00:05:10,454 My faith is in thee! 65 00:05:10,694 --> 00:05:11,494 Loyal lady! 66 00:05:11,734 --> 00:05:14,254 Find the relic before the new moon 67 00:05:14,494 --> 00:05:16,654 or it will be paid for in blood! 68 00:05:17,454 --> 00:05:20,894 Damned this icy land of yours! August approaches, 69 00:05:21,134 --> 00:05:22,414 and we freeze! 70 00:05:26,734 --> 00:05:28,174 what ails thee? 71 00:05:28,454 --> 00:05:29,694 Sire! 72 00:05:33,414 --> 00:05:35,174 why are you here, Eusabius? 73 00:05:35,414 --> 00:05:37,134 You're back safe and sound? 74 00:05:37,374 --> 00:05:38,414 Indeed. 75 00:05:38,654 --> 00:05:41,734 Your squire too? All is back to normal? 76 00:05:41,974 --> 00:05:45,334 while he drinks, someone swiped the Duke's jewels. 77 00:05:45,694 --> 00:05:47,254 My crystal balls are cloudy. 78 00:05:47,654 --> 00:05:50,174 My potions boil over! I'm scared! 79 00:05:50,414 --> 00:05:53,574 Go now. I will call you when I need you. 80 00:05:53,814 --> 00:05:57,494 It is as if the Corridors of Time were still open! 81 00:06:13,014 --> 00:06:14,334 Strange dogs! 82 00:06:14,854 --> 00:06:16,254 Nice doggies... 83 00:06:18,534 --> 00:06:20,334 They look like wolves. 84 00:06:20,734 --> 00:06:24,134 I don't believe it! They are wolves! 85 00:06:24,454 --> 00:06:26,134 wolves in the woods! 86 00:06:52,574 --> 00:06:53,574 Unbelievable! 87 00:06:58,054 --> 00:07:00,494 Hello, sir. Call the police! 88 00:07:00,734 --> 00:07:03,854 Circus animals are running loose in the woods! 89 00:07:04,094 --> 00:07:04,814 It's horrific! 90 00:07:05,054 --> 00:07:06,534 Look at me, man! 91 00:07:06,774 --> 00:07:10,534 what bad breath! It's like a septic tank! 92 00:07:10,774 --> 00:07:13,134 He looks like Jacquasse the Crass! 93 00:07:13,374 --> 00:07:14,974 He's far too dainty! 94 00:07:15,214 --> 00:07:18,174 Maybe he seduced a foreign princess! 95 00:07:20,414 --> 00:07:22,254 He's handsomely dressed 96 00:07:23,014 --> 00:07:24,334 and so cute! 97 00:07:24,574 --> 00:07:25,814 You're crazy! 98 00:07:26,054 --> 00:07:28,934 Get your hairy hands off me, ass breath! 99 00:07:29,894 --> 00:07:32,614 Holy scrotum! Catch him! 100 00:07:32,974 --> 00:07:34,614 Out of my way! 101 00:07:47,214 --> 00:07:48,014 stop him! 102 00:07:48,254 --> 00:07:50,494 If he flees, he must be guilty! 103 00:07:52,134 --> 00:07:54,334 That hurts! Let go! 104 00:07:54,574 --> 00:07:55,334 Hands off! 105 00:07:55,574 --> 00:07:57,614 Grand Inquisitor, look! 106 00:07:57,854 --> 00:07:58,974 Monks? 107 00:08:02,334 --> 00:08:05,214 Hey! Grand Guru! Head Honcho! 108 00:08:05,454 --> 00:08:08,014 Let me go and I'll keep quiet. 109 00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:09,494 Just call me a taxi. 110 00:08:09,734 --> 00:08:12,014 Confess and die in peace. 111 00:08:12,614 --> 00:08:15,694 Look! A little catapult! 112 00:08:22,454 --> 00:08:23,254 stand back! 113 00:08:23,734 --> 00:08:25,014 It's not mine! 114 00:08:25,254 --> 00:08:28,774 I was drugged and put in these stupid clothes! 115 00:08:34,174 --> 00:08:36,374 The stake! Fire will purge him! 116 00:08:36,614 --> 00:08:39,294 It's a toy! It's Jacquasse's! 117 00:08:40,374 --> 00:08:41,734 Burn him! 118 00:08:44,494 --> 00:08:48,854 It's a cow moo! what do you have against cows? 119 00:08:49,534 --> 00:08:50,814 Hurry, my love! 120 00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:56,334 My father has boils. He vomiteth pus. 121 00:09:00,494 --> 00:09:01,334 The Relic! 122 00:09:01,934 --> 00:09:04,294 Have you found the Relic 123 00:09:04,894 --> 00:09:06,774 of saint Rolande? 124 00:09:17,534 --> 00:09:20,214 He is possessed. we need an exorcist! 125 00:09:24,054 --> 00:09:28,934 we found Jacquasse! The Inquisitor wants to burn him! 126 00:09:29,174 --> 00:09:29,934 My Jacquasse? 127 00:09:30,174 --> 00:09:31,614 what's this scuzz? 128 00:09:33,014 --> 00:09:35,454 Hey there, Big Cheese! 129 00:09:36,014 --> 00:09:38,294 Let me join your sect and send you 130 00:09:38,534 --> 00:09:40,214 a big fat check! 131 00:09:42,534 --> 00:09:45,094 Abandon satan and die forgiven. 132 00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:47,014 Do you speak French? 133 00:09:47,574 --> 00:09:49,494 won't you take my check? 134 00:09:51,894 --> 00:09:53,734 Put that tuna down, okay? 135 00:09:53,974 --> 00:09:55,214 Okayyy! 136 00:09:57,334 --> 00:09:58,854 No touching the fish! 137 00:09:59,094 --> 00:10:00,574 wondrous codpieces! 138 00:10:00,814 --> 00:10:03,654 Our salesgirls are happy to serve you. 139 00:10:04,094 --> 00:10:05,414 Mighty meats! 140 00:10:05,654 --> 00:10:08,134 - Keep your cod! - so get out! 141 00:10:08,374 --> 00:10:09,134 Okay? 142 00:10:11,854 --> 00:10:12,974 Lady Ginette! 143 00:10:13,214 --> 00:10:15,894 Juicy beans and big fat sausage! 144 00:10:16,334 --> 00:10:18,894 It's locked inside! Thievery! 145 00:10:19,134 --> 00:10:21,054 stop shaking the bean stew! 146 00:10:21,534 --> 00:10:22,414 Give it to me! 147 00:10:23,734 --> 00:10:25,094 You'll break it! 148 00:10:29,054 --> 00:10:30,014 My shoes! 149 00:10:31,454 --> 00:10:32,814 Eat this! 150 00:10:42,334 --> 00:10:44,374 - what's that? - To make bread! 151 00:10:44,614 --> 00:10:47,654 Good riddance! we don't want your kind here! 152 00:10:48,974 --> 00:10:49,614 Bums! 153 00:10:51,934 --> 00:10:53,294 These hurt! 154 00:10:54,014 --> 00:10:56,814 - Open your window! - I prefer my bootlets! 155 00:10:57,054 --> 00:10:57,774 It's vile! 156 00:10:58,014 --> 00:11:00,214 - I smell nothing. - It reeks! 157 00:11:00,454 --> 00:11:02,374 They reek not! 158 00:11:05,934 --> 00:11:07,294 Long live the Count! 159 00:11:07,534 --> 00:11:09,654 You're making a big boo-boo! 160 00:11:09,894 --> 00:11:11,774 It's warming up! 161 00:11:12,014 --> 00:11:13,974 There's Cousin Hubert! 162 00:11:15,734 --> 00:11:16,814 I am the Count. 163 00:11:17,214 --> 00:11:19,374 How dare you burn him on my land? 164 00:11:19,614 --> 00:11:22,854 The life and death of my serfs is my affair. 165 00:11:23,374 --> 00:11:25,174 Destroying satan is mine. 166 00:11:27,574 --> 00:11:29,814 He is my loyal servant, Jacquasse. 167 00:11:30,094 --> 00:11:34,134 Explain the satanic noise this box makes. 168 00:11:36,334 --> 00:11:38,014 Yes? I'm waiting. 169 00:11:38,854 --> 00:11:40,094 I'm getting hot! 170 00:11:40,454 --> 00:11:42,134 I've had enough! 171 00:11:43,214 --> 00:11:45,854 If he sinned, he will be punished. 172 00:11:46,094 --> 00:11:48,654 But I'll attend the trial. Obey the law. 173 00:11:48,894 --> 00:11:51,294 we'll interrogate him in your castle. 174 00:11:51,534 --> 00:11:53,294 It won't take long. 175 00:11:53,534 --> 00:11:55,014 I dislike your manners. 176 00:11:55,254 --> 00:11:56,574 And I, yours. 177 00:11:56,814 --> 00:11:59,134 while you yak away, I'm burning! 178 00:12:03,894 --> 00:12:05,494 About time! 179 00:12:05,734 --> 00:12:08,694 what is this madhouse? who are these crazies? 180 00:12:09,014 --> 00:12:11,294 Holy scrotums! Jacquasse's descendant! 181 00:12:11,894 --> 00:12:13,934 I'm not his descendant at all! 182 00:12:14,174 --> 00:12:17,734 Take me to the hotel. I'm calling the police chief! 183 00:12:17,974 --> 00:12:19,814 Believe me, heads will roll! 184 00:12:20,054 --> 00:12:21,614 Keep quiet, peasant, 185 00:12:21,854 --> 00:12:23,654 or you will die. 186 00:12:24,054 --> 00:12:27,134 I want him in irons and shackles. 187 00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:29,734 I agree! Gag him too! 188 00:12:30,254 --> 00:12:31,494 what the hell? 189 00:12:37,654 --> 00:12:39,254 Honey for my gullet! 190 00:12:39,494 --> 00:12:41,414 It's chocolate, not honey! 191 00:12:41,814 --> 00:12:45,494 10 Crunch Bars in 5 minutes! You'll be sick as a dog! 192 00:12:45,814 --> 00:12:49,334 Crunch! Chocolate! Long live chocolate! 193 00:12:49,614 --> 00:12:50,694 Let me steer! 194 00:12:51,254 --> 00:12:52,654 Got a license? 195 00:12:52,894 --> 00:12:54,014 Here, drive. 196 00:12:54,254 --> 00:12:57,254 Careful, dummy, or we'll bite the dust! 197 00:12:58,534 --> 00:13:01,174 You're zigzagging, buddy! 198 00:13:01,734 --> 00:13:03,414 Keep cool, baby. 199 00:13:03,654 --> 00:13:04,854 Cool! 200 00:13:05,134 --> 00:13:06,974 You're a real ace! 201 00:13:07,214 --> 00:13:08,494 My turn now. 202 00:13:08,734 --> 00:13:10,374 Ace charioteer! 203 00:13:15,014 --> 00:13:16,694 Learn to drive, asshole! 204 00:13:21,094 --> 00:13:25,254 vile beggar! slug-eating rascal! Away with you! 205 00:13:26,094 --> 00:13:28,774 You sound dumb! Kinda like a medieval knight! 206 00:13:29,814 --> 00:13:31,494 what means "medieval"? 207 00:13:31,974 --> 00:13:33,054 You don't know? 208 00:13:33,294 --> 00:13:36,534 Culture-wise, you're a real dick! 209 00:13:37,294 --> 00:13:38,774 what befalls? 210 00:13:40,614 --> 00:13:42,614 Oh shit! 211 00:13:43,174 --> 00:13:46,014 This shit heap guzzles gas! 212 00:13:46,694 --> 00:13:48,414 shit heap! 213 00:13:48,654 --> 00:13:51,654 we'll pawn your jewels and buy another. 214 00:13:51,894 --> 00:13:54,654 No, I'll bury my jewels at Lady Beatrice's 215 00:13:54,894 --> 00:13:56,854 and save them for my bastards. 216 00:13:57,094 --> 00:14:00,014 Let's blow it all! That's what money's for! 217 00:14:00,374 --> 00:14:02,854 Let's tan our toes in saint Tropez! 218 00:14:03,854 --> 00:14:08,094 No, we'll return to our Good Mistress. we'll toil away for her. 219 00:14:08,334 --> 00:14:10,734 In turn, she will pay and protect us. 220 00:14:10,974 --> 00:14:13,654 Lady Beatrice is mean. she's a bimbo. 221 00:14:14,014 --> 00:14:15,734 A bimbo? Yes, yes... 222 00:14:16,134 --> 00:14:17,294 Yeah, a bimbo! 223 00:14:18,174 --> 00:14:21,174 Let's go see Lady Beatrice the Bimbo. 224 00:14:25,614 --> 00:14:28,134 Jean-Pierre, you're exhausting me! 225 00:14:28,374 --> 00:14:31,694 I expected more from you than stupid skepticism. 226 00:14:31,934 --> 00:14:34,974 I'm not the only skeptical one, right doctor? 227 00:14:35,214 --> 00:14:39,054 Godefroy, Mr. Kass and Dame Ginette are from the Middle Ages. 228 00:14:39,294 --> 00:14:40,854 I know you can be thick, 229 00:14:41,094 --> 00:14:44,454 but think in terms of the Tv show "The X-Files", 230 00:14:44,694 --> 00:14:46,934 which you hate and the kids love. 231 00:14:48,894 --> 00:14:52,014 Sir, Madame de Montmirail is calling you back. 232 00:14:52,334 --> 00:14:53,374 You told Mummy? 233 00:14:53,614 --> 00:14:55,534 No, it's Cora. Hubert's wife. 234 00:14:55,774 --> 00:14:57,254 I told her he's back! 235 00:14:57,854 --> 00:14:59,814 That was a big mistake. 236 00:15:01,334 --> 00:15:02,734 Cora? Jean-Pierre here. 237 00:15:02,974 --> 00:15:04,014 How dumb! Hang up! 238 00:15:04,254 --> 00:15:07,414 Your husband has turned up. Here. 239 00:15:09,174 --> 00:15:10,374 How irresponsible! 240 00:15:10,614 --> 00:15:13,974 I kept quiet when I thought Godefroy was Hubert 241 00:15:14,214 --> 00:15:18,174 because even before he went to Borneo, he hated her. 242 00:15:18,414 --> 00:15:20,414 She's your problem now. 243 00:15:20,654 --> 00:15:21,934 Relax! You're tired. 244 00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,534 Take your drops and I'll have Pizza Hut deliver. 245 00:15:26,974 --> 00:15:28,014 A trumpet? 246 00:15:32,334 --> 00:15:34,414 why work for these asses? 247 00:15:35,494 --> 00:15:36,694 Hi, Mr. Goulard. 248 00:15:36,934 --> 00:15:37,654 what now? 249 00:15:37,894 --> 00:15:39,574 Sustenance and shelter! 250 00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:42,694 Let us toil for Lady Beatrice the Bimbo 251 00:15:43,134 --> 00:15:44,414 for food and lodging. 252 00:15:44,654 --> 00:15:46,454 - what? - I won't bust my buns! 253 00:15:46,694 --> 00:15:48,414 Beatrice is sick. 254 00:15:49,454 --> 00:15:51,614 That asshole hurt you! 255 00:15:52,854 --> 00:15:54,694 Jean-Pierre, you're awful! 256 00:15:55,134 --> 00:15:58,534 Jacques Kass is a friend and you kick him out! 257 00:15:58,774 --> 00:16:00,374 Come in, Mr. Kass. 258 00:16:01,014 --> 00:16:02,614 Not with their rubbish! 259 00:16:04,334 --> 00:16:07,334 Off'rings for my mistress, Beatrice the Bimbo. 260 00:16:07,574 --> 00:16:08,334 what? 261 00:16:08,574 --> 00:16:11,174 "Off'rings" is the word from back then. 262 00:16:11,414 --> 00:16:14,774 It means "gifts". A thousand thanks, dear servant. 263 00:16:15,014 --> 00:16:17,254 Enter with your damsel. 264 00:16:17,494 --> 00:16:19,134 He called you a bimbo. 265 00:16:19,374 --> 00:16:21,814 For them the meaning is different. 266 00:16:22,054 --> 00:16:23,494 Not for me! 267 00:16:23,734 --> 00:16:26,974 Bring your goodly victuals into the kitchen. 268 00:16:27,214 --> 00:16:29,774 Hastily, Lady Beatrice the Bimbo! 269 00:16:31,294 --> 00:16:33,654 She loves this bimbo stuff. Help us. 270 00:16:34,774 --> 00:16:36,974 what a nice surprise! 271 00:16:37,214 --> 00:16:37,934 You forgot? 272 00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:40,694 Not at all. Go in. I'll join you. 273 00:16:40,934 --> 00:16:45,214 Beatrice! I'm repairing a bridge. Call me if the Kasses 274 00:16:45,454 --> 00:16:46,654 make any trouble. 275 00:16:46,894 --> 00:16:49,454 Gentle servant, we have a grave problem. 276 00:16:49,694 --> 00:16:52,534 Mr. Jacquart went back to your times. 277 00:16:53,094 --> 00:16:54,814 - Understand? - Yes! 278 00:16:55,054 --> 00:16:56,894 we can't leave him there. 279 00:16:57,774 --> 00:16:58,934 Yes! 280 00:16:59,494 --> 00:17:00,894 Let's solve this now. 281 00:17:01,974 --> 00:17:04,534 Too new a word. solveth? 282 00:17:08,614 --> 00:17:11,094 You understand? Let's solveth this. 283 00:17:11,334 --> 00:17:13,334 'Tis an honor for him to serve 284 00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:15,414 as sire Godefroy's squire. 285 00:17:15,654 --> 00:17:17,374 Mr. Kass, Jacquart cannot 286 00:17:17,614 --> 00:17:19,494 be a squire. He's too... 287 00:17:19,854 --> 00:17:22,614 sophisticated. He'll hate the climate. 288 00:17:22,854 --> 00:17:24,734 Go home and send him back. 289 00:17:25,014 --> 00:17:26,854 Have you any potion left? 290 00:17:27,094 --> 00:17:30,214 No more of that vile potion! Never again! 291 00:17:32,854 --> 00:17:36,854 Don't spit on my floor! It took hours to get that shine! 292 00:17:40,894 --> 00:17:42,694 Is Ginette medieval too? 293 00:17:44,054 --> 00:17:45,934 That's what I thought. 294 00:17:46,254 --> 00:17:48,054 Dame Ginette... 295 00:17:48,294 --> 00:17:51,134 would you and Mr. Kass be so goodly 296 00:17:51,374 --> 00:17:54,494 as to set the goodly table for my goodly family 297 00:17:54,734 --> 00:17:57,494 so that we may break bread? 298 00:17:57,734 --> 00:17:59,214 I must see someone 299 00:17:59,454 --> 00:18:01,934 who'll send you back you-know-where. 300 00:18:02,174 --> 00:18:04,334 - where? - To the land of castles 301 00:18:04,694 --> 00:18:06,334 and valiant knights. 302 00:18:06,574 --> 00:18:08,934 Are you feeling well, Mrs. Goulard? 303 00:18:09,174 --> 00:18:12,414 You'll both eat at the table, not on the floor. 304 00:18:13,694 --> 00:18:14,934 we're not dogs. 305 00:18:15,374 --> 00:18:19,454 I'm tolerant. My husband's a commoner but I don't mind. 306 00:18:19,694 --> 00:18:20,454 Thanks a ton! 307 00:18:20,694 --> 00:18:22,294 So setteth the table. 308 00:18:22,534 --> 00:18:25,494 Yeah, I get it. I'm the new slave. 309 00:18:45,694 --> 00:18:46,574 Get lost! 310 00:18:47,294 --> 00:18:48,614 - The peasant! - Go! 311 00:18:49,254 --> 00:18:50,894 what a pain! 312 00:18:53,374 --> 00:18:54,814 A new gardener? 313 00:18:55,054 --> 00:18:57,974 My wife decided to help a hobo and his wife. 314 00:18:58,614 --> 00:18:59,734 we all should. 315 00:19:00,694 --> 00:19:03,134 If you want ours, be my guest! 316 00:19:09,414 --> 00:19:12,534 sorry, it's just the gum. I can't see a thing. 317 00:19:12,774 --> 00:19:14,654 Here, put this on it. 318 00:19:20,214 --> 00:19:21,694 My cigars in the sink! 319 00:19:26,534 --> 00:19:27,894 Did you touch these? 320 00:19:29,854 --> 00:19:30,494 I see... 321 00:19:37,974 --> 00:19:39,934 I have an urgent errand to run. 322 00:19:40,174 --> 00:19:41,094 where? 323 00:19:41,334 --> 00:19:43,934 I have to send Mr. Kass 324 00:19:44,174 --> 00:19:45,734 and Dame Ginette back. 325 00:19:45,974 --> 00:19:47,494 They'll be home alone? 326 00:19:47,734 --> 00:19:49,894 I'll put them in front of the Tv. 327 00:19:56,574 --> 00:19:57,294 It blew! 328 00:20:10,774 --> 00:20:14,494 what's this mess? why did you touch the fridge? 329 00:20:14,934 --> 00:20:16,294 Bea! 330 00:20:18,014 --> 00:20:21,374 Kass is breaking bottles in the kitchen! 331 00:20:22,774 --> 00:20:24,134 Come here. 332 00:20:24,374 --> 00:20:27,334 Everything here is too unusual for you. 333 00:20:28,174 --> 00:20:30,534 - Unusual? - It's all so new to you. 334 00:20:31,414 --> 00:20:32,054 Bitch. 335 00:20:33,134 --> 00:20:36,374 Excuse me... Back to work. 336 00:20:37,974 --> 00:20:41,414 You two will be good and sit on this bench 337 00:20:41,654 --> 00:20:43,374 which we call a "sofa". 338 00:20:43,614 --> 00:20:44,654 surprise time! 339 00:20:44,894 --> 00:20:46,014 Like minstrels? 340 00:20:47,614 --> 00:20:50,734 Hark! Hark! Here they come! 341 00:20:51,814 --> 00:20:54,494 Great, isn't it? Now get Mr. Kass 342 00:20:54,734 --> 00:20:57,454 and show him the "minstrel box"! 343 00:20:57,894 --> 00:21:00,334 Yeah, right. The minstrel box. 344 00:21:00,934 --> 00:21:01,854 Old bat! 345 00:21:08,294 --> 00:21:10,334 Daddy-o! Bimbo-bo left. 346 00:21:10,574 --> 00:21:13,054 It's cocktail time! see if they have 347 00:21:13,294 --> 00:21:14,414 cable TV. 348 00:21:16,334 --> 00:21:18,974 Go look. step on it! 349 00:21:26,134 --> 00:21:27,294 Devilry! 350 00:21:33,774 --> 00:21:36,614 Don't move, ma'am. This is the hard part. 351 00:21:44,694 --> 00:21:47,814 what the hell did they do? I knew it! 352 00:21:51,894 --> 00:21:53,734 The needle's in your palate. 353 00:21:53,974 --> 00:21:55,574 I'll take it right out. 354 00:21:56,614 --> 00:21:57,654 Devilry! 355 00:21:58,094 --> 00:21:59,654 what's wrong, Daddy-o? 356 00:22:02,814 --> 00:22:04,214 God Almighty! 357 00:22:05,694 --> 00:22:07,934 what on earth happened? 358 00:22:08,454 --> 00:22:11,974 what happened? what did you do? The Tv imploded! 359 00:22:12,614 --> 00:22:14,254 I'm deaf! I'm deaf! 360 00:22:14,494 --> 00:22:16,414 It exploded in his face! 361 00:22:16,654 --> 00:22:18,374 stop moving. Let me look. 362 00:22:20,494 --> 00:22:21,774 I'm deaf! 363 00:22:22,014 --> 00:22:24,214 His ear is full of wax! 364 00:22:24,454 --> 00:22:26,614 My poor Daddy-o! Call a doctor! 365 00:22:27,054 --> 00:22:28,334 I am a doctor! 366 00:22:28,574 --> 00:22:31,534 I'm deaf! stone-deaf! 367 00:22:31,774 --> 00:22:34,534 Try to yawn. Yawn! 368 00:22:39,494 --> 00:22:42,294 Nice going, Daddy-o! Nice going! 369 00:22:43,414 --> 00:22:46,134 I can hear! I can hear! 370 00:22:46,374 --> 00:22:48,374 The Devil box burst into flames! 371 00:22:48,614 --> 00:22:50,974 Shitty TV! was it secondhand? 372 00:22:51,214 --> 00:22:52,254 shut up! 373 00:22:52,974 --> 00:22:56,494 what's that smell? something's burning! 374 00:22:58,694 --> 00:22:59,934 The sofas! 375 00:23:00,294 --> 00:23:01,654 water, fast! 376 00:23:01,894 --> 00:23:03,774 water! water! 377 00:23:04,094 --> 00:23:05,654 The Fire Department! 378 00:23:10,214 --> 00:23:12,974 water! water! Here comes water! 379 00:23:18,374 --> 00:23:20,054 Dr. Eusebe - Medium 380 00:23:24,214 --> 00:23:27,334 That hurts! The professor gave my ancestor 381 00:23:27,574 --> 00:23:29,334 a time-traveling potion. 382 00:23:29,574 --> 00:23:30,334 He's sick. 383 00:23:30,574 --> 00:23:32,694 Let her in, Mariette! 384 00:23:34,614 --> 00:23:35,974 sorry to bother you, 385 00:23:36,214 --> 00:23:39,494 but I need a drop of the potion 386 00:23:39,734 --> 00:23:41,774 you gave Godefroy, my ancestor? 387 00:23:42,174 --> 00:23:44,734 He left his servant and his wife here 388 00:23:44,974 --> 00:23:47,214 and took off with Jacquart. 389 00:23:47,734 --> 00:23:48,534 Get it? 390 00:23:48,774 --> 00:23:52,334 Everyone must get back into place. 391 00:23:55,694 --> 00:23:57,934 Goodness gracious! Books of magic! 392 00:23:59,094 --> 00:24:01,574 I'll need strength to concoct the potion. 393 00:24:01,814 --> 00:24:03,974 It requires concentration. 394 00:24:04,214 --> 00:24:06,814 Mariette will deliver it at dawn. 395 00:24:07,094 --> 00:24:09,454 Never mention what you've seen. 396 00:24:09,694 --> 00:24:12,054 No one wants to believe these things, 397 00:24:12,734 --> 00:24:15,854 and the uninitiated pay for it dearly. 398 00:24:16,894 --> 00:24:18,854 There are rats! 399 00:24:19,094 --> 00:24:21,254 Help! Rats! 400 00:24:28,254 --> 00:24:29,574 Rats! 401 00:24:30,014 --> 00:24:32,014 Here's your slop, satan child! 402 00:24:32,534 --> 00:24:36,734 Eat up, because tomorrow, you'll be on the rack! 403 00:24:36,974 --> 00:24:39,254 It's you! Don't you recognize me? 404 00:24:40,574 --> 00:24:42,374 Aren't you Jacques Kass? 405 00:24:42,614 --> 00:24:43,894 You know my brother? 406 00:24:44,134 --> 00:24:47,694 That toad! I'm Prosper the Manure Man. 407 00:24:47,934 --> 00:24:49,894 - The what? - I collect manure. 408 00:24:50,214 --> 00:24:51,814 That's what I smell! 409 00:24:52,614 --> 00:24:55,494 we're family. You can't abandon me! 410 00:24:55,734 --> 00:24:58,814 I have a gorgeous 18-carat gold watch. 411 00:24:59,054 --> 00:25:01,374 If you let me out, it's yours! 412 00:25:02,054 --> 00:25:03,414 It's chic! 413 00:25:03,854 --> 00:25:06,334 Thief! Come back here! 414 00:25:06,574 --> 00:25:08,854 - Piglet! - I'm sorry! 415 00:25:11,374 --> 00:25:13,454 Don't go, cousin! 416 00:25:13,694 --> 00:25:16,734 we found sergeant Gibbon squeezed into a cage, 417 00:25:16,974 --> 00:25:18,254 half-dressed, 418 00:25:18,494 --> 00:25:21,654 drugged with a massive dose of Dragonal. 419 00:25:21,894 --> 00:25:24,294 I'm investigating the assault. 420 00:25:24,534 --> 00:25:26,974 when can I interrogate Gibbon? 421 00:25:27,214 --> 00:25:30,054 He's safe, but full of anti-depressants. 422 00:25:30,294 --> 00:25:32,534 He'll be on cloud nine for weeks. 423 00:25:32,774 --> 00:25:34,254 Unfortunate. 424 00:25:35,614 --> 00:25:38,934 I hear he jotted things down in a notebook. 425 00:25:39,174 --> 00:25:40,734 Bingo. 426 00:25:43,094 --> 00:25:44,494 Unusual. 427 00:25:45,814 --> 00:25:47,934 Is it a prescription drug? 428 00:25:48,174 --> 00:25:50,374 Dragonal? small doses are calming. 429 00:25:50,614 --> 00:25:54,534 Large doses plus alcohol make it an antidysleptic. 430 00:25:54,774 --> 00:25:57,574 Lots of kids stuff themselves with it 431 00:25:57,814 --> 00:26:00,814 at rave parties. They all look like him. 432 00:26:01,054 --> 00:26:03,454 Rave parties, peptic antidepressants... 433 00:26:03,694 --> 00:26:05,454 Psychodysleptic. 434 00:26:06,014 --> 00:26:07,014 Yeah, psycho. 435 00:26:22,214 --> 00:26:23,814 Thanks, but keep clear. 436 00:26:24,174 --> 00:26:26,414 Leave it to us, okay? 437 00:26:33,534 --> 00:26:35,654 Am I speaking Chinese? Get lost! 438 00:26:43,454 --> 00:26:44,454 Ignoramus! 439 00:26:44,894 --> 00:26:46,294 Gilbert! Rene! 440 00:26:48,694 --> 00:26:52,494 The needle broke and I can't get it out. 441 00:26:55,534 --> 00:26:57,534 Excuse me. It may be my wife. 442 00:27:00,254 --> 00:27:02,254 Cora, we got cut off before. 443 00:27:02,494 --> 00:27:05,134 Bad timing. The Tv imploded. 444 00:27:05,934 --> 00:27:07,014 Hubert's fine. 445 00:27:07,254 --> 00:27:10,334 Just amnesiac. I'll let his friend explain. 446 00:27:11,094 --> 00:27:13,174 Mr. Kass! Mr. Kass! 447 00:27:13,414 --> 00:27:15,054 Come here! 448 00:27:18,654 --> 00:27:19,734 Gilbert! 449 00:27:20,374 --> 00:27:22,254 Cousin Hube's wife. 450 00:27:27,294 --> 00:27:28,774 Here he is. 451 00:27:35,374 --> 00:27:38,134 Hello, sir. Are you Montmirail's friend? 452 00:27:38,374 --> 00:27:40,654 Me? I'm Jacquasse! 453 00:27:41,454 --> 00:27:43,654 Is this amnesia stuff for the birds? 454 00:27:43,894 --> 00:27:44,654 what is it? 455 00:27:45,254 --> 00:27:48,814 The birds? Bird chasing! 456 00:27:56,494 --> 00:27:57,734 Must you whistle? 457 00:27:57,974 --> 00:28:01,214 why did that bastard disappear from my life 458 00:28:01,454 --> 00:28:02,974 for 15 years? 459 00:28:03,214 --> 00:28:04,574 You're embarrassed! 460 00:28:04,814 --> 00:28:08,134 The minstrel box is in flames! It is devilry! 461 00:28:09,014 --> 00:28:10,814 what? who is this idiot! 462 00:28:11,974 --> 00:28:14,214 - where is Montmirail? - In his fortress. 463 00:28:14,454 --> 00:28:16,854 Celebrating his marriage! 464 00:28:17,094 --> 00:28:19,374 He's remarrying? Perfect. 465 00:28:19,614 --> 00:28:22,734 Tell him to expect some legal trouble, okay? 466 00:28:24,374 --> 00:28:25,734 This guy's an ass. 467 00:28:26,254 --> 00:28:28,414 Can I speak to Hubert? 468 00:28:29,254 --> 00:28:30,934 Are you Hubert's friend? 469 00:28:31,414 --> 00:28:32,454 Do you know him? 470 00:28:33,534 --> 00:28:35,894 The idiot doesn't even know Hubert. 471 00:28:38,094 --> 00:28:40,054 He hung up on me! 472 00:28:47,614 --> 00:28:49,894 Philippine, your father's alive. 473 00:28:50,534 --> 00:28:51,214 He is? 474 00:28:56,934 --> 00:29:00,054 Look. I was five when he disappeared. 475 00:29:06,974 --> 00:29:08,494 Gilbert, let her rip! 476 00:29:08,734 --> 00:29:11,254 Gilbert! Let her rip! 477 00:29:11,614 --> 00:29:15,174 - what happened? - A fire due to a Tv that imploded. 478 00:29:15,654 --> 00:29:17,374 Hilda, are the kids okay? 479 00:29:17,614 --> 00:29:18,894 we just got here. 480 00:29:19,134 --> 00:29:22,014 Is the man who insists on helping a relative? 481 00:29:22,254 --> 00:29:24,174 Mr. Kass? Yes, he's... kin. 482 00:29:24,414 --> 00:29:29,814 Tell him to stop. He may get hurt. He'll ruin our equipment. 483 00:29:30,054 --> 00:29:31,854 Dame Ginette, please tell 484 00:29:32,094 --> 00:29:35,174 your goodly companion not to help the... 485 00:29:36,294 --> 00:29:39,214 The helmeted foot soldiers can manage alone. 486 00:29:39,894 --> 00:29:41,294 say what? 487 00:29:41,534 --> 00:29:44,374 They don't need him. where is Jean-Pierre? 488 00:29:44,614 --> 00:29:46,414 what a shitty day! 489 00:29:48,854 --> 00:29:51,214 All done. what a day! 490 00:29:53,894 --> 00:29:56,134 we don't need a second hose! 491 00:29:56,374 --> 00:29:57,214 It unwinds! 492 00:29:57,454 --> 00:29:58,494 Rinse! 493 00:29:58,734 --> 00:30:01,854 They're flooding the house! what happened? 494 00:30:02,094 --> 00:30:05,454 Kass threw vodka on the fire! 495 00:30:12,414 --> 00:30:15,094 Turn it off! It's wet enough. 496 00:30:15,894 --> 00:30:17,774 All my carpets are floating! 497 00:30:18,014 --> 00:30:21,574 we did what we had to. You can sleep safe and sound. 498 00:30:28,014 --> 00:30:31,374 Do I have to wait much longer? 499 00:30:38,574 --> 00:30:40,574 Cut off the water! 500 00:30:40,814 --> 00:30:41,574 Cut! 501 00:30:52,134 --> 00:30:53,654 A mop! 502 00:31:08,854 --> 00:31:11,334 The water's cut off, chief! 503 00:31:12,774 --> 00:31:14,654 what asshole turned it on? 504 00:31:17,694 --> 00:31:18,454 Shit heap! 505 00:31:18,694 --> 00:31:19,374 Excuse me? 506 00:31:19,614 --> 00:31:20,574 Hands off. 507 00:31:21,374 --> 00:31:22,894 Dumb ass! 508 00:31:23,254 --> 00:31:25,334 The bum broke the siren! 509 00:31:33,094 --> 00:31:35,454 This joke is in bad taste! 510 00:31:35,894 --> 00:31:38,934 I'm sorry, ma'am. I forgot about you. 511 00:31:39,174 --> 00:31:41,214 Your hobo hosed me down! 512 00:31:41,454 --> 00:31:44,134 I'll ruin your reputation! 513 00:31:47,014 --> 00:31:48,494 Swine! 514 00:31:49,054 --> 00:31:51,574 I paid to get my mouth destroyed! 515 00:31:51,814 --> 00:31:53,334 I won't forget this! 516 00:31:53,574 --> 00:31:56,374 Kass! why did you soak his patient? 517 00:31:57,814 --> 00:32:00,014 You and your Dame must go back home. 518 00:32:00,254 --> 00:32:02,294 what the hell is going on? 519 00:32:02,534 --> 00:32:04,774 You're a butcher, not a dentist! 520 00:32:08,374 --> 00:32:09,734 You okay? 521 00:32:10,734 --> 00:32:12,494 No more ice. 522 00:32:19,294 --> 00:32:21,934 That's risky, Daddy-o! 523 00:32:22,734 --> 00:32:26,134 They're safer in Hot Mama's little bag. 524 00:32:26,574 --> 00:32:28,574 The Duke lost his jewels? 525 00:32:28,814 --> 00:32:31,654 Heal him or I shan't marry. 526 00:32:32,094 --> 00:32:34,534 Take the man on the stake 527 00:32:34,774 --> 00:32:38,134 back to his time, or the seven plagues of Egypt 528 00:32:38,654 --> 00:32:41,374 will strike your lands. 529 00:32:41,854 --> 00:32:46,694 Icy winds sweep through the open Corridors of Time. 530 00:32:47,254 --> 00:32:49,214 I'll prepare the potion. 531 00:32:49,454 --> 00:32:51,934 Make haste before Jacquasse's descendant 532 00:32:52,174 --> 00:32:55,254 denounces us all to the Inquisitor. 533 00:32:55,694 --> 00:32:57,094 The Inquisitor? Here? 534 00:32:57,494 --> 00:33:00,414 I will pack my bags and leave at once! 535 00:33:00,654 --> 00:33:02,414 First fix the plagues! 536 00:33:05,094 --> 00:33:06,414 what is it? 537 00:33:06,854 --> 00:33:08,574 It's for me. The old biddy. 538 00:33:10,454 --> 00:33:12,734 Half a glass for each. 539 00:33:15,094 --> 00:33:16,334 Here's the spell. 540 00:33:16,574 --> 00:33:19,054 It stinks! They'll never drink this! 541 00:33:19,294 --> 00:33:21,574 You can't taste it in cocoa. 542 00:33:21,814 --> 00:33:24,614 And it doesn't alter the potion. 543 00:33:29,894 --> 00:33:31,614 A drop of magic potion... 544 00:33:35,494 --> 00:33:37,734 Rise and shine! Breakfast time! 545 00:33:37,974 --> 00:33:39,134 Her again. 546 00:33:39,374 --> 00:33:42,294 Hot cocoa! Have you ever had chocolate? 547 00:33:42,534 --> 00:33:45,574 Hot, hot, hot, hot cocoa! 548 00:33:45,814 --> 00:33:48,094 Chocolate! Crunch! Crunch! 549 00:33:48,454 --> 00:33:50,974 You know Crunch Bars? This is Nesquik! 550 00:33:52,174 --> 00:33:54,654 Slowly, don't choke! 551 00:33:55,174 --> 00:33:56,134 I'm off! 552 00:33:56,374 --> 00:33:58,374 Happy golfing! see you tonight! 553 00:33:58,614 --> 00:33:59,734 Begone, peasant! 554 00:33:59,974 --> 00:34:01,134 I'll handle them. 555 00:34:03,054 --> 00:34:06,014 Hot cocoa! what a good idea. we never have it. 556 00:34:06,254 --> 00:34:07,774 Cocoa is new to you. 557 00:34:08,094 --> 00:34:11,574 The conquistadores brought it back 558 00:34:11,814 --> 00:34:13,614 from Mejico ages ago. 559 00:34:13,854 --> 00:34:15,134 It was the rage! 560 00:34:15,374 --> 00:34:18,014 People adore it! As Jean-Pierre says: 561 00:34:18,254 --> 00:34:22,094 "Try new things or you'll end up a dum-dum!" 562 00:34:22,934 --> 00:34:26,734 No way, bimbo-bo! screw your Mexican snobs! 563 00:34:26,974 --> 00:34:28,574 I won't puke for you. 564 00:34:28,814 --> 00:34:30,254 Give me her nectar! 565 00:34:30,494 --> 00:34:32,334 stop, it's not for you! 566 00:34:33,334 --> 00:34:35,334 It's your turn! 567 00:34:35,574 --> 00:34:37,974 Get off my back! stop hounding me! 568 00:34:38,214 --> 00:34:40,454 I'm not Bimbo-bo's slave! 569 00:34:40,694 --> 00:34:43,214 I'll get gas and hock the jewels. 570 00:34:43,894 --> 00:34:45,534 Then it's party time! 571 00:34:46,294 --> 00:34:48,254 First drink your cocoa! 572 00:34:48,494 --> 00:34:50,134 My jewels! 573 00:34:52,174 --> 00:34:54,614 - I'll cut her throat! - Stay here! 574 00:34:55,094 --> 00:34:56,694 why are you screaming? 575 00:34:59,734 --> 00:35:01,774 Per horus et per ra 576 00:35:04,374 --> 00:35:06,014 per solem invictus du chere 577 00:35:15,574 --> 00:35:17,374 Jean-Pierre! It works! 578 00:35:17,614 --> 00:35:19,014 That proves it! 579 00:35:21,134 --> 00:35:23,334 what are all these golf balls? 580 00:35:26,134 --> 00:35:28,934 Dame Ginette... she's no piece of cake. 581 00:35:30,774 --> 00:35:33,094 Hark! Hark! Goodly Dame Ginette! 582 00:35:33,334 --> 00:35:34,414 Hear ye! 583 00:35:34,654 --> 00:35:37,814 Can thou manage in this hostile world? 584 00:35:38,054 --> 00:35:40,094 - You bet. - vaunt thee not! 585 00:35:40,334 --> 00:35:42,134 I'm off to Bourges. 586 00:35:42,374 --> 00:35:44,494 That's 500, not 50. 587 00:35:44,734 --> 00:35:47,654 she talks weird. Is she a foreigner? 588 00:35:47,894 --> 00:35:50,494 Pure French with a stick up her ass. 589 00:35:51,254 --> 00:35:52,174 Dame Ginette! 590 00:35:52,934 --> 00:35:55,334 You're blocking the corridors! 591 00:35:55,574 --> 00:35:57,014 Lend me an ear! 592 00:35:57,254 --> 00:36:00,014 I'll stick like glue till you try my cocoa. 593 00:36:00,254 --> 00:36:03,334 Okay, Glue Girl. You can help me. Carry these. 594 00:36:03,574 --> 00:36:06,334 I got a bad back. we'll talk cocoa later. 595 00:36:06,574 --> 00:36:07,974 You're on! 596 00:36:08,214 --> 00:36:10,174 very heavy... 597 00:36:10,454 --> 00:36:11,254 Dame Ginette! 598 00:36:12,094 --> 00:36:14,614 what's all this gas for? 599 00:36:15,374 --> 00:36:17,254 You know about combustion? 600 00:36:17,494 --> 00:36:19,054 shut up and walk! 601 00:36:19,294 --> 00:36:22,374 You're a fast learner! Good for you! 602 00:36:22,654 --> 00:36:27,014 Do you really think you can live without Mr. Kass? 603 00:36:27,254 --> 00:36:30,494 Mrs. Goulard, I'm an emancipated woman. 604 00:36:30,734 --> 00:36:32,214 I'm no guy's slave. 605 00:36:32,454 --> 00:36:36,254 Me neither. I say "Halt!" when my hubby gets macho. 606 00:36:40,894 --> 00:36:42,534 what am I doing here? 607 00:36:45,494 --> 00:36:46,974 Help! 608 00:37:04,854 --> 00:37:05,814 sire Goulard! 609 00:37:06,374 --> 00:37:08,734 Mr. Kass! what's going on here? 610 00:37:09,294 --> 00:37:12,534 Black magic! we're in wolfen times! 611 00:37:12,774 --> 00:37:14,174 what times? 612 00:37:16,294 --> 00:37:18,614 You took my gold letter-opener? 613 00:37:20,494 --> 00:37:23,214 what are you doing? 614 00:37:27,014 --> 00:37:29,334 Idiot! You busted my coccyx! 615 00:37:29,574 --> 00:37:30,894 Hush! 616 00:37:33,414 --> 00:37:35,934 I smell horses! Hide thyself! 617 00:37:36,174 --> 00:37:40,134 stop playing cowboys and Indians! Answer me! 618 00:37:45,654 --> 00:37:47,494 - who's that? - The Thug! 619 00:37:47,774 --> 00:37:50,734 The Duke of Luigny! Burgundy scum! 620 00:37:57,734 --> 00:38:00,254 what's that fortress over there? 621 00:38:00,494 --> 00:38:01,494 It's Montmirail's. 622 00:38:01,734 --> 00:38:03,694 - what year is this? - Follow me! 623 00:38:03,934 --> 00:38:05,934 The Thug attacks! 624 00:38:17,054 --> 00:38:18,294 I'm in slippers! 625 00:38:21,414 --> 00:38:24,174 where are we, Mr. Kass? 626 00:38:27,174 --> 00:38:30,014 I don't like this! 627 00:38:42,694 --> 00:38:44,654 Jacquasse is back! 628 00:38:45,094 --> 00:38:47,254 Be gentle, Boniface. 629 00:38:48,454 --> 00:38:49,894 The Thug attacks! 630 00:38:57,134 --> 00:38:59,494 I take this village in ransom! 631 00:39:11,934 --> 00:39:14,014 what is this place? 632 00:39:14,694 --> 00:39:18,294 My task is terrible, but to free you of Evil 633 00:39:18,534 --> 00:39:20,414 it must be done. 634 00:39:20,654 --> 00:39:23,374 what are you going to do? 635 00:39:24,134 --> 00:39:25,094 The funnel! 636 00:39:27,174 --> 00:39:28,334 what's that thing? 637 00:39:32,814 --> 00:39:35,014 Postpone this. The alarm sounds. 638 00:39:35,254 --> 00:39:36,974 I must aid my serfs. 639 00:39:38,174 --> 00:39:40,574 Do your duty and I'll do mine. 640 00:39:41,054 --> 00:39:42,454 water! 641 00:39:44,614 --> 00:39:46,614 we will make him confess. 642 00:39:46,854 --> 00:39:48,094 we'll have proof 643 00:39:48,334 --> 00:39:51,694 to hang this sinner by his guts! The trial by water 644 00:39:51,934 --> 00:39:54,294 will merely loosen him up. 645 00:39:54,534 --> 00:39:56,854 should ever you slay him, 646 00:39:57,294 --> 00:39:58,374 I'll slay you. 647 00:40:14,134 --> 00:40:16,974 He's after me, Mr. Kass! 648 00:40:24,774 --> 00:40:27,414 I want 9 holes of golf, not a Holy war! 649 00:40:31,374 --> 00:40:32,654 The Thug! 650 00:40:32,894 --> 00:40:34,254 Flee! 651 00:40:36,214 --> 00:40:37,894 Let's pillage! 652 00:40:47,414 --> 00:40:48,894 wait for me! 653 00:41:03,574 --> 00:41:06,854 I'm clad like a fancy merchant! 654 00:41:13,494 --> 00:41:15,454 Help! Jacquasse is back! 655 00:41:15,934 --> 00:41:17,574 Help! Help! 656 00:41:17,814 --> 00:41:20,534 why did I marry you, wench? 657 00:41:22,174 --> 00:41:24,574 - who are you? - Relax! 658 00:41:26,614 --> 00:41:28,894 wait for me, Mr. Kass! 659 00:41:32,694 --> 00:41:34,214 Holy scrotums! 660 00:41:49,294 --> 00:41:52,294 we've caught Montmirail's squire! 661 00:41:52,814 --> 00:41:54,574 Long live Burgundy! 662 00:41:54,934 --> 00:41:56,934 we'll drown him in a sack! 663 00:42:00,014 --> 00:42:02,214 Toil, never recoil! 664 00:42:04,454 --> 00:42:06,614 Prepare to die, Montmirail. 665 00:42:07,374 --> 00:42:08,934 Your land will be mine. 666 00:42:09,174 --> 00:42:12,254 Kneel before the Duke of Burgundy! 667 00:42:12,494 --> 00:42:15,774 Never. My master is the King of France! 668 00:42:24,014 --> 00:42:25,334 Jacquasse! 669 00:42:25,574 --> 00:42:27,174 sire Ganelon! 670 00:42:44,894 --> 00:42:46,454 I'll be back! 671 00:42:46,694 --> 00:42:48,174 Confess beforehand! 672 00:42:51,894 --> 00:42:53,574 Thank you, Master! 673 00:42:53,854 --> 00:42:55,294 Bless you and your kin! 674 00:42:56,014 --> 00:42:58,174 The Crass! You're here? 675 00:42:58,694 --> 00:43:01,974 You didn't send your descendant in your place? 676 00:43:03,654 --> 00:43:06,974 He is in my dungeon, with the Inquisitor. 677 00:43:07,214 --> 00:43:10,254 My descendant? with the Inquisitor? 678 00:43:10,934 --> 00:43:15,014 A rascal stole the Duke's jewels and the sacred tooth. 679 00:43:17,694 --> 00:43:20,214 If I marry not, I will have no heirs. 680 00:43:20,454 --> 00:43:21,854 who can it be? 681 00:43:22,094 --> 00:43:23,494 searcheth me! 682 00:43:23,734 --> 00:43:26,734 I charge you to find the evil-doer. 683 00:43:26,974 --> 00:43:28,814 I'll have him skinned alive. 684 00:43:29,374 --> 00:43:30,734 Alive? 685 00:43:31,054 --> 00:43:32,974 we will be merciless! 686 00:43:35,054 --> 00:43:38,054 Sire, do not leave me alone! 687 00:43:48,374 --> 00:43:49,334 Run, Crass! 688 00:43:49,574 --> 00:43:51,294 Yes, sire! 689 00:43:57,614 --> 00:43:59,734 You've forgotten how to trot! 690 00:44:01,254 --> 00:44:02,774 You're soft! 691 00:44:03,294 --> 00:44:04,334 Like a pup! 692 00:44:05,094 --> 00:44:06,694 - Lady-love! - My beloved! 693 00:44:06,934 --> 00:44:08,774 Father is gravely ill. 694 00:44:09,014 --> 00:44:10,654 where is the tooth? 695 00:44:10,894 --> 00:44:12,174 The Crass inquires. 696 00:44:12,414 --> 00:44:14,054 I do, your Ladyship. 697 00:44:15,134 --> 00:44:16,374 I'll go pray. 698 00:44:16,894 --> 00:44:18,134 sire! 699 00:44:18,814 --> 00:44:21,854 The wretch is confessing to vile sins! 700 00:44:29,534 --> 00:44:31,054 Disarm him! 701 00:44:31,574 --> 00:44:35,574 I arrest you! He has divulged your devilish pact! 702 00:44:36,094 --> 00:44:38,694 He burnt... the Range... Rover. 703 00:44:38,934 --> 00:44:41,214 I accuse you of burning a man named 704 00:44:41,454 --> 00:44:42,774 Range, Robert. 705 00:44:43,014 --> 00:44:45,174 Brother, who is Robert Range? 706 00:44:45,414 --> 00:44:47,574 we'll soon find out. water! 707 00:44:55,654 --> 00:44:57,494 My descendant is choking! 708 00:44:57,734 --> 00:45:00,694 silence! Don't interfere! Brand his tongue! 709 00:45:12,974 --> 00:45:14,774 Down with the Inquisitor! 710 00:45:53,094 --> 00:45:55,694 Heretics! Castle of heathens! 711 00:45:55,934 --> 00:45:58,214 Devil worshipers! You'll all burn! 712 00:45:58,494 --> 00:46:00,414 I'll destroy the lot of you! 713 00:46:04,334 --> 00:46:06,374 Lower the portcullis. 714 00:46:07,614 --> 00:46:08,854 I owe you my life. 715 00:46:09,374 --> 00:46:11,174 My duty is to protect you. 716 00:46:17,214 --> 00:46:19,734 My descendant! His gutlets are swollen! 717 00:46:26,854 --> 00:46:29,574 stop playing with him. Change your attire. 718 00:46:29,814 --> 00:46:31,254 That suits you not. 719 00:46:44,214 --> 00:46:46,014 sire! Eusabius has arrived. 720 00:46:51,734 --> 00:46:52,854 Jacquasse! 721 00:46:53,254 --> 00:46:55,934 why must I carry your descendant alone? 722 00:46:56,174 --> 00:46:59,414 I was greeting my long-lost brother. 723 00:46:59,774 --> 00:47:03,214 what is his problem? The doorway is too small! 724 00:47:03,814 --> 00:47:05,494 sire! He pisseth! 725 00:47:07,054 --> 00:47:08,494 This is unending! 726 00:47:17,854 --> 00:47:19,814 whence this to-do? 727 00:47:20,054 --> 00:47:22,814 It is drafty here. You'll catcheth cold. 728 00:47:23,054 --> 00:47:24,694 'Tis icy for August! 729 00:47:26,254 --> 00:47:28,214 I have to piss! 730 00:47:28,894 --> 00:47:30,054 He must pisseth! 731 00:47:31,294 --> 00:47:33,294 He pisseth on my shoes! 732 00:47:50,734 --> 00:47:51,414 Give me that. 733 00:47:51,974 --> 00:47:54,214 - Drink this! - I'm full. 734 00:47:55,494 --> 00:47:57,574 Drink, I say! 735 00:47:59,734 --> 00:48:02,814 say the spell, before he vomits! 736 00:48:27,654 --> 00:48:31,014 My descendant! He is but a pile of dung! 737 00:48:34,814 --> 00:48:37,574 Emeralds on your fat fingers? 738 00:48:42,494 --> 00:48:45,334 A present from a secret admirer! 739 00:48:45,574 --> 00:48:47,854 Lies! You stole from the Duke! 740 00:48:48,094 --> 00:48:49,294 He was dead! 741 00:48:49,534 --> 00:48:52,094 - I want them! - Dame Ginette robbed me! 742 00:48:52,334 --> 00:48:55,294 Dame Ginette? You mean... There? 743 00:48:55,534 --> 00:48:58,454 I see! The Duke is being sucked from within. 744 00:48:59,094 --> 00:49:01,814 His jewels pull him into the Corridors. 745 00:49:02,214 --> 00:49:05,254 His jewels cannot stay there 746 00:49:05,494 --> 00:49:06,734 if he is here. 747 00:49:07,614 --> 00:49:09,654 I'll slay you, damned slug! 748 00:49:10,214 --> 00:49:12,454 You owe me your life! 749 00:49:14,014 --> 00:49:16,454 Calamitas! Give me the potion! 750 00:49:16,694 --> 00:49:20,454 we'll find Dame Ginette and bring back the sacred tooth. 751 00:49:20,694 --> 00:49:22,414 Or I'll have no heirs! 752 00:49:22,654 --> 00:49:25,374 Not the potion! It twists my guts! 753 00:49:29,214 --> 00:49:30,254 Drink! 754 00:49:39,334 --> 00:49:42,134 I hope to see you soon, safe and sound. 755 00:49:42,374 --> 00:49:44,134 That potion is dangerous. 756 00:49:44,414 --> 00:49:46,454 Drinking it takes courage. 757 00:49:46,694 --> 00:49:47,494 Much courage. 758 00:49:49,054 --> 00:49:50,774 For our return. 759 00:49:51,414 --> 00:49:52,974 I'm scared! 760 00:50:07,574 --> 00:50:08,814 They're gone. 761 00:50:09,334 --> 00:50:12,254 If they don't come back, I'll bury you 762 00:50:12,494 --> 00:50:14,694 in the deepest dungeons. 763 00:50:22,454 --> 00:50:25,334 I'm impressed! You're an ace at the wheel! 764 00:50:25,574 --> 00:50:26,974 And no license! 765 00:50:27,214 --> 00:50:29,494 If you had one, I'd be floored. 766 00:50:29,814 --> 00:50:31,014 - where now? - Bourges. 767 00:50:32,374 --> 00:50:33,534 Tell me... 768 00:50:33,774 --> 00:50:37,294 what is your house like? A hut with mud walls? 769 00:50:38,054 --> 00:50:41,014 No, we make bricks with our own shit. 770 00:50:43,174 --> 00:50:44,414 Gracious me! 771 00:50:45,614 --> 00:50:48,734 It's a great day for Jean-Pierre to play golf. 772 00:51:12,974 --> 00:51:16,694 Tell my beloved we'll be at my cousin's castle. 773 00:51:17,814 --> 00:51:19,134 'Tis Father's wish. 774 00:51:24,174 --> 00:51:26,014 Bea! Bea! 775 00:51:28,254 --> 00:51:30,214 who's this ruffian? 776 00:51:46,094 --> 00:51:47,014 Another madman! 777 00:51:49,414 --> 00:51:51,614 where are you going now? 778 00:51:51,854 --> 00:51:54,374 To find a classy pawnbroker. 779 00:51:55,094 --> 00:51:57,974 I have some hot rocks. see you at the bar. 780 00:51:58,734 --> 00:52:00,694 I'll wait in this pub. 781 00:52:02,054 --> 00:52:04,494 A glass of water and an empty glass. 782 00:52:10,294 --> 00:52:13,014 Dame Ginette! Come drink your cocoa! 783 00:52:14,894 --> 00:52:16,334 Naughty girl! 784 00:52:47,894 --> 00:52:49,294 Holy scrotums! 785 00:52:49,854 --> 00:52:53,254 - we're walled in! - God punished us for drinking! 786 00:52:53,774 --> 00:52:55,414 silence, slug! 787 00:52:56,294 --> 00:52:57,974 Any sign of them? 788 00:52:58,214 --> 00:53:00,614 - Calling Clovis. - Clovis, here. 789 00:53:01,014 --> 00:53:03,774 No Jacquart here. we'll dredge the pond. 790 00:53:04,294 --> 00:53:07,094 - we're walled in! - Quiet, serf. 791 00:53:07,334 --> 00:53:09,214 Eusabius had warned us! 792 00:53:09,454 --> 00:53:11,254 Doddering clod! 793 00:53:12,854 --> 00:53:15,014 we'll ram with this beam! 794 00:53:17,214 --> 00:53:18,254 It's hefty! 795 00:53:18,494 --> 00:53:20,694 Let's assume he wasn't kidnapped. 796 00:53:20,934 --> 00:53:23,694 Did Mr. Jacquart ever go away unannounced? 797 00:53:23,934 --> 00:53:26,214 sometimes he'd leave for a few days. 798 00:53:26,654 --> 00:53:28,294 His little outings. 799 00:53:28,534 --> 00:53:31,494 Outings? what did his outings consist of? 800 00:53:32,174 --> 00:53:34,774 Biking, golf, windsurfing. Boy's stuff. 801 00:53:39,934 --> 00:53:40,894 Gourmet meals... 802 00:53:41,254 --> 00:53:45,414 with lots of wine. Did he have a drinking problem? 803 00:53:54,774 --> 00:53:56,934 Juglets! Juglets of wine! 804 00:54:03,854 --> 00:54:04,854 Come, boozehound! 805 00:54:05,094 --> 00:54:06,854 To King Louis the Fat! 806 00:54:08,294 --> 00:54:09,454 Long Live the Fat! 807 00:54:10,694 --> 00:54:11,894 Come! 808 00:54:19,014 --> 00:54:22,174 Mr. Jacquart is a wine connoisseur, that's all. 809 00:54:26,254 --> 00:54:28,614 Here's to you, bumpkins! 810 00:54:29,934 --> 00:54:31,014 who's the hobo? 811 00:54:31,254 --> 00:54:32,334 Jacquart's brother. 812 00:54:32,574 --> 00:54:34,974 He's the wino type. 813 00:54:53,534 --> 00:54:56,494 They don't come running for our bags! 814 00:54:58,094 --> 00:54:59,094 Anyone here? 815 00:55:02,894 --> 00:55:04,654 The gypsies are back! 816 00:55:05,134 --> 00:55:08,054 Don't move! what did you do with Jacquart? 817 00:55:08,294 --> 00:55:10,334 silence and I'll slay thee not. 818 00:55:10,574 --> 00:55:13,774 Chocolate! Crunch! Godefroy! 819 00:55:17,134 --> 00:55:19,094 - Come, fool. - At once, sire! 820 00:55:20,014 --> 00:55:21,614 Put back my mousse! 821 00:55:24,174 --> 00:55:25,734 Thank you, good man! 822 00:55:25,974 --> 00:55:27,654 Thank you, kind lady! 823 00:55:35,974 --> 00:55:38,414 His hair is aIways picture-perfect! 824 00:55:40,574 --> 00:55:42,294 Toil, never recoil! 825 00:55:43,854 --> 00:55:45,094 what's happening? 826 00:55:48,134 --> 00:55:51,134 strike not, sire! It is the minstrel box! 827 00:55:51,414 --> 00:55:53,214 Hold this mousse, bawd! 828 00:55:53,454 --> 00:55:54,614 And eat it not! 829 00:56:02,934 --> 00:56:04,694 Give me that, wench! 830 00:56:04,934 --> 00:56:07,174 Check how many stars they have. 831 00:56:07,414 --> 00:56:09,774 - why? - They threw out a Tv. 832 00:56:10,334 --> 00:56:11,534 Maybe it's broken. 833 00:56:11,894 --> 00:56:13,974 Gisele... the guide book! 834 00:56:18,374 --> 00:56:20,454 The chimney sweep yelled at me! 835 00:56:22,174 --> 00:56:23,494 Here are the porters. 836 00:56:23,774 --> 00:56:26,414 Look at their clothes. Not very fresh. 837 00:56:27,814 --> 00:56:29,094 You're so critical. 838 00:56:29,334 --> 00:56:31,614 There are more bags in the trunk. 839 00:56:31,854 --> 00:56:34,454 Good man, take us in your chariot! 840 00:56:34,934 --> 00:56:36,574 - Now! - I say! 841 00:56:36,814 --> 00:56:38,654 - I'll complain! - Obey or die! 842 00:56:39,414 --> 00:56:40,774 Be still, strumpet! 843 00:56:48,574 --> 00:56:51,454 I can't breathe! This skunk is killing me! 844 00:56:51,694 --> 00:56:52,414 shut up! 845 00:56:52,814 --> 00:56:54,414 where does Ginette live? 846 00:56:54,814 --> 00:56:57,974 He travels too hastily. I shall vomit phlegm. 847 00:56:58,214 --> 00:57:00,534 sire Godefroy must phlegmeth! 848 00:57:00,774 --> 00:57:02,014 - what? - Phlegm! 849 00:57:02,254 --> 00:57:02,934 stop! 850 00:57:03,174 --> 00:57:06,254 stop the chariot! He must phlegmeth! 851 00:57:10,054 --> 00:57:11,294 Get off me! 852 00:57:11,694 --> 00:57:13,054 Don't work them up! 853 00:57:13,574 --> 00:57:15,454 You must drink vinegar. 854 00:57:15,694 --> 00:57:18,694 start the car while they're out there! 855 00:57:19,774 --> 00:57:21,734 stop screaming, numbskull! 856 00:57:21,974 --> 00:57:23,614 You're stressing me! 857 00:57:23,854 --> 00:57:26,854 I can steer a chariot! Dame Ginette taught me! 858 00:57:29,774 --> 00:57:31,574 I'll drive less hastily! 859 00:57:31,814 --> 00:57:33,934 Let me die alone! 860 00:57:40,654 --> 00:57:41,334 Hurry! 861 00:57:42,974 --> 00:57:44,454 we're stuck. 862 00:57:44,694 --> 00:57:45,734 You stalled! 863 00:57:51,614 --> 00:57:52,694 You try! 864 00:57:53,694 --> 00:57:55,734 - Here we go. - Backwards! 865 00:57:57,094 --> 00:57:58,494 Drive, godammit! 866 00:57:58,734 --> 00:58:00,854 Hold your horses! 867 00:58:01,174 --> 00:58:02,014 The chariot! 868 00:58:04,094 --> 00:58:06,614 Drive! The lunatics are coming! 869 00:58:10,174 --> 00:58:12,934 Faster! Get him off! 870 00:58:13,174 --> 00:58:14,654 I can't! 871 00:58:19,134 --> 00:58:21,814 You're hopeless! It's unbelievable! 872 00:58:22,054 --> 00:58:23,054 Quiet! 873 00:58:31,934 --> 00:58:33,254 Not bad. 874 00:58:41,854 --> 00:58:45,094 - You shook him off! My hero! - That's enough! 875 00:58:46,214 --> 00:58:49,454 Hosanna, sire! 876 00:58:51,854 --> 00:58:55,254 Bravo, sire! Just like in the good old days! 877 00:59:03,814 --> 00:59:07,374 so Hube de Montmirail abducted Mr. Jacquart? 878 00:59:07,614 --> 00:59:10,334 I bet he strangled him with a chain! 879 00:59:10,574 --> 00:59:12,454 Don't get carried away. 880 00:59:13,654 --> 00:59:15,254 what century is this? 881 00:59:15,494 --> 00:59:16,294 The boss! 882 00:59:16,534 --> 00:59:17,374 where were you? 883 00:59:17,614 --> 00:59:19,254 Force-fed putrid water! 884 00:59:19,494 --> 00:59:21,254 Tortured by a mad monk! 885 00:59:21,494 --> 00:59:23,854 I was in the Middle Ages! 886 00:59:25,494 --> 00:59:29,494 Arrest Montmirail. He drugged me and sent me to wolfen times. 887 00:59:29,734 --> 00:59:31,334 Like sergeant Gibbon? 888 00:59:32,414 --> 00:59:33,894 Pee-pee! 889 00:59:42,054 --> 00:59:44,134 why is he in the broom closet? 890 00:59:44,374 --> 00:59:45,694 Relieving himself. 891 00:59:48,934 --> 00:59:51,134 - what's downstairs? - The wine cellar. 892 00:59:51,374 --> 00:59:53,374 The wine cellar. It figures. 893 01:00:01,534 --> 01:00:02,894 To the left! 894 01:00:15,014 --> 01:00:16,814 Drive, since you can! 895 01:00:17,054 --> 01:00:18,934 At once, sire! 896 01:00:24,854 --> 01:00:26,934 Nothing, not even a noise! 897 01:00:27,214 --> 01:00:31,334 I am pressing the pedalette, as did Dame Ginette! 898 01:00:32,774 --> 01:00:35,374 what are all these pedalettes? 899 01:00:36,574 --> 01:00:38,934 Alight, knave! You are no charioteer! 900 01:00:39,414 --> 01:00:40,894 Hosanna! 901 01:00:47,334 --> 01:00:49,054 Hold the reigns tight! 902 01:00:49,294 --> 01:00:50,654 The van! 903 01:00:52,294 --> 01:00:54,494 I am a master charioteer! 904 01:00:54,734 --> 01:00:58,014 All is under control. Take comfort. 905 01:01:40,374 --> 01:01:41,854 we're going backwards! 906 01:01:42,094 --> 01:01:44,934 Indeed, sire! But I am not to blame! 907 01:01:49,534 --> 01:01:53,254 It's bolting! It's bolting! 908 01:02:28,214 --> 01:02:30,134 It's the Moor, sire! 909 01:02:30,374 --> 01:02:31,094 The psychos! 910 01:02:32,054 --> 01:02:34,414 The psychos are back! 911 01:02:41,934 --> 01:02:44,654 with this garb, we can go unnoticed. 912 01:02:44,894 --> 01:02:46,454 wily ruse! 913 01:02:50,094 --> 01:02:52,294 No one has remarked us yet. 914 01:02:52,534 --> 01:02:54,014 The ruse works! 915 01:02:54,734 --> 01:02:57,494 Officers! Officers! 916 01:02:57,894 --> 01:03:00,174 Officers! 917 01:03:00,454 --> 01:03:01,414 Damned bawd! 918 01:03:01,654 --> 01:03:02,894 silence. Yes, woman? 919 01:03:03,134 --> 01:03:06,014 My son won't do his work. 920 01:03:06,254 --> 01:03:08,774 He just watches Tv. so I said: 921 01:03:09,014 --> 01:03:12,294 "Do your work or I'll call the cops. " 922 01:03:12,534 --> 01:03:15,014 Can you scare him a bit? 923 01:03:15,254 --> 01:03:16,454 Follow me. 924 01:03:22,134 --> 01:03:24,214 Eddy, the police came for you. 925 01:03:25,134 --> 01:03:26,974 Go on. scare him a little. 926 01:03:38,254 --> 01:03:39,614 work, little man! 927 01:03:40,694 --> 01:03:42,414 Cursed minstrel box! 928 01:03:48,774 --> 01:03:51,134 The neighbor's throwing Tvs now! 929 01:04:01,174 --> 01:04:03,134 Here he is! 930 01:04:03,374 --> 01:04:06,214 I'm innocent! I'm Beatrice's husband! 931 01:04:06,974 --> 01:04:08,574 Drink this potion! 932 01:04:08,814 --> 01:04:10,334 what potion? 933 01:04:17,894 --> 01:04:19,694 My God! They're back! 934 01:04:21,254 --> 01:04:25,214 - Godefroy, why are you here? - Let's find Dame Ginette! 935 01:04:25,454 --> 01:04:28,414 The jewel thief! we'll cut off her hand! 936 01:04:28,654 --> 01:04:31,094 The jewels of my future father-in-law. 937 01:04:32,094 --> 01:04:35,774 what are you wearing? where did you steal those? 938 01:04:36,014 --> 01:04:37,734 - we found them. - In a chariot. 939 01:04:37,974 --> 01:04:40,534 If they find you, we'll be in a crunch! 940 01:04:41,014 --> 01:04:44,374 Chocolate! Crunch! Crunch! 941 01:04:44,614 --> 01:04:46,374 we must find Dame Ginette. 942 01:04:47,174 --> 01:04:48,974 she slipped away at Bourges. 943 01:04:49,574 --> 01:04:50,374 To Bourges! 944 01:04:50,614 --> 01:04:52,814 Off with her hand at Bourges! 945 01:04:53,054 --> 01:04:55,374 she vanished. Flew the coop! 946 01:04:55,614 --> 01:04:56,414 vanish'd? 947 01:04:56,654 --> 01:04:58,894 vanish'd! Calamitas! 948 01:04:59,134 --> 01:05:01,294 'Tis tragedy, my child. 949 01:05:01,534 --> 01:05:04,454 Only the Relic can close the Corridors of Time. 950 01:05:04,694 --> 01:05:07,814 If the Duke dies, I will not marry. 951 01:05:08,134 --> 01:05:09,894 I will have no heirs. 952 01:05:10,134 --> 01:05:12,854 Ultra urgent! we have to hurry. 953 01:05:13,094 --> 01:05:16,974 - Or 7 plagues will strike! - 7 plagues? Nasty! 954 01:05:21,774 --> 01:05:22,654 Anyone home? 955 01:05:24,974 --> 01:05:27,454 - A marshal! - Death to him! 956 01:05:34,174 --> 01:05:35,774 Take off your jackets! 957 01:05:36,014 --> 01:05:40,694 Give me that knife. You better not touch the policeman! 958 01:05:40,934 --> 01:05:42,814 But he'll arrest us! 959 01:05:43,054 --> 01:05:45,174 Take these stripes off. 960 01:05:46,894 --> 01:05:48,614 Get moving! 961 01:05:50,654 --> 01:05:53,654 Godefroy, remember you're cousin Hube. 962 01:05:53,894 --> 01:05:56,414 Be on your best behavior. 963 01:05:56,654 --> 01:05:57,774 Anyone home? 964 01:06:00,534 --> 01:06:01,614 Hello, Colonel. 965 01:06:01,854 --> 01:06:03,014 Captain. 966 01:06:03,254 --> 01:06:04,934 Captain Batardet, I'm looking 967 01:06:05,174 --> 01:06:06,934 for Hubert de Montmirail. 968 01:06:07,174 --> 01:06:10,294 You're in luck. Hube came for tea... 969 01:06:10,934 --> 01:06:12,374 with his mechanic. 970 01:06:14,854 --> 01:06:15,654 Gentlemen... 971 01:06:16,254 --> 01:06:17,974 Hube is a rally driver. 972 01:06:18,374 --> 01:06:21,054 Not recommended for obeying speed limits. 973 01:06:36,774 --> 01:06:38,694 since a near-fatal accident, 974 01:06:38,934 --> 01:06:41,254 they only wear blue and white. 975 01:06:42,494 --> 01:06:43,334 Fair enough. 976 01:06:44,174 --> 01:06:45,134 You had a fire? 977 01:06:45,574 --> 01:06:48,694 The Tv exploded. All of a sudden. 978 01:06:49,334 --> 01:06:51,774 something smells really vile. 979 01:06:52,214 --> 01:06:53,654 The fire. 980 01:06:57,214 --> 01:06:58,894 More like... dirty feet. 981 01:06:59,454 --> 01:07:01,654 Minstrel box caused great fire. 982 01:07:01,894 --> 01:07:04,614 Don't you know "The Minstrel Box"? 983 01:07:05,454 --> 01:07:08,094 A new Tv show of golden oldies? 984 01:07:08,334 --> 01:07:09,534 very nostalgic. 985 01:07:09,774 --> 01:07:12,774 I stick to the weather and traffic reports. 986 01:07:13,934 --> 01:07:16,214 Mr. Jacquart claims 987 01:07:16,454 --> 01:07:19,094 you drugged him and put him in a cage... 988 01:07:28,214 --> 01:07:29,454 Phlegm trouble. 989 01:07:33,294 --> 01:07:36,094 You know Mr. Jacquart, his brother. 990 01:07:36,334 --> 01:07:37,214 The Manure Man! 991 01:07:37,454 --> 01:07:39,374 A brother other than Jacquart? 992 01:07:39,614 --> 01:07:41,094 He's a little Crass! 993 01:07:41,334 --> 01:07:43,974 He is swine, good only for pissing. 994 01:07:44,214 --> 01:07:45,614 You're exaggerating. 995 01:07:45,854 --> 01:07:48,134 water torture makes him piss! 996 01:07:48,374 --> 01:07:51,894 sorry to say so, but he pisses anywhere. 997 01:07:52,134 --> 01:07:55,214 so you agree that his brother is a wino. 998 01:07:56,574 --> 01:07:57,494 They agree. 999 01:07:57,734 --> 01:07:59,654 Let us go find Dame Ginette. 1000 01:07:59,894 --> 01:08:02,934 - And cut her hand off! - Cut whose hand off? 1001 01:08:03,174 --> 01:08:05,534 she's a friend with leprosy. 1002 01:08:05,774 --> 01:08:07,974 she caught it in Borneo. 1003 01:08:08,214 --> 01:08:11,974 we're gradually cutting off her arm. It's ghastly. 1004 01:08:12,334 --> 01:08:14,134 God knows where it will end. 1005 01:08:14,854 --> 01:08:16,734 Incurable diseases are awful. 1006 01:08:17,174 --> 01:08:18,254 I'm sorry. 1007 01:08:18,494 --> 01:08:19,454 My husband! 1008 01:08:21,334 --> 01:08:23,534 I'm going to bed. I'm dead. 1009 01:08:23,774 --> 01:08:28,094 where were you? You didn't play golf? what happened? 1010 01:08:28,334 --> 01:08:29,974 I fell asleep. 1011 01:08:30,654 --> 01:08:33,614 In the woods. I had a terrible nightmare. 1012 01:08:33,974 --> 01:08:35,774 I'm going back to bed. 1013 01:08:36,014 --> 01:08:37,534 At noon? To bed? 1014 01:08:37,774 --> 01:08:39,814 He's back! 1015 01:08:40,254 --> 01:08:44,134 He was at Petronille's! Chesty Petronille! 1016 01:08:45,574 --> 01:08:48,214 why sleep outside? 1017 01:08:48,614 --> 01:08:50,694 - who's Petronille? - No idea! 1018 01:08:51,894 --> 01:08:54,134 stop by the precinct this week 1019 01:08:54,374 --> 01:08:56,254 if you wish to refute 1020 01:08:56,494 --> 01:08:58,694 his brother's allegations. 1021 01:08:58,934 --> 01:09:00,654 He's full of manure! 1022 01:09:01,334 --> 01:09:04,814 Things aren't kissy-kissy in the family. 1023 01:09:05,334 --> 01:09:07,734 Goodbye, ma'am. And call a plumber. 1024 01:09:07,974 --> 01:09:12,614 A pipe probably burst in the fire. It smells like a sewer in here. 1025 01:09:13,014 --> 01:09:14,734 I'll see you out. 1026 01:09:24,134 --> 01:09:25,214 what happened? 1027 01:09:25,454 --> 01:09:28,054 It's nothing. The lighter exploded. 1028 01:09:28,294 --> 01:09:29,934 The lighter? 1029 01:09:32,334 --> 01:09:33,854 Incredible! 1030 01:09:35,014 --> 01:09:36,454 Mr. Kass, tell me... 1031 01:09:37,334 --> 01:09:39,654 This may sound stupid 1032 01:09:39,894 --> 01:09:43,694 but were we together in a wet forest with wolves? 1033 01:09:43,934 --> 01:09:45,854 wolfens! wolfens! 1034 01:09:46,094 --> 01:09:47,854 wolves, idiot! Forget it. 1035 01:09:48,214 --> 01:09:49,934 Thanks anyway. 1036 01:09:50,174 --> 01:09:52,094 - Do we have a lighter? - Yes, sir. 1037 01:09:52,334 --> 01:09:55,574 watch out. They can rip your face off. 1038 01:09:58,094 --> 01:10:01,254 Beatrice! I finally found this shack of yours. 1039 01:10:01,934 --> 01:10:02,854 Is Hubert here? 1040 01:10:03,654 --> 01:10:05,454 I'll just open the gate. 1041 01:10:08,094 --> 01:10:10,414 Come, child! In the chariot! 1042 01:10:10,654 --> 01:10:12,734 we're in a pickle! It's Cora, 1043 01:10:12,974 --> 01:10:14,854 Hubert's wife. Hide! 1044 01:10:15,174 --> 01:10:16,374 No, Hubert! 1045 01:10:16,814 --> 01:10:19,574 You've hidden for 10 years. Not this time! 1046 01:10:21,454 --> 01:10:22,374 That's Dad? 1047 01:10:22,854 --> 01:10:25,934 Yes. He's changed. I barely recognize you. 1048 01:10:26,174 --> 01:10:27,614 You've gotten old. 1049 01:10:27,854 --> 01:10:31,334 Life hasn't spared thee. You are unrecognizable. 1050 01:10:31,694 --> 01:10:34,734 As rude as usual. Now I know it's you. 1051 01:10:34,974 --> 01:10:37,134 Cut the trollop's tongue! 1052 01:10:37,374 --> 01:10:38,454 - what? - silence! 1053 01:10:39,014 --> 01:10:40,214 Dad! 1054 01:10:40,454 --> 01:10:41,694 You won't kiss her? 1055 01:10:44,654 --> 01:10:47,574 A girl-child! Beautiful bastard! 1056 01:10:47,814 --> 01:10:50,774 Hube has amnesia. You have to be patient. 1057 01:10:51,014 --> 01:10:52,214 This is Philippine. 1058 01:10:52,534 --> 01:10:54,654 The daughter you had with Cora. 1059 01:10:54,974 --> 01:10:56,254 she's your wife. 1060 01:10:57,494 --> 01:11:00,254 Belle Lippine, you fill my heart with joy. 1061 01:11:00,494 --> 01:11:03,534 My heirs are as pure as morning dew. 1062 01:11:03,774 --> 01:11:05,214 I've waited so long. 1063 01:11:05,574 --> 01:11:07,534 You were in Borneo? 1064 01:11:07,774 --> 01:11:10,254 Get the bastard to a nunnery! 1065 01:11:11,414 --> 01:11:13,494 what is he talking about? 1066 01:11:14,654 --> 01:11:16,094 Did we speak yesterday? 1067 01:11:18,134 --> 01:11:19,934 Yes, it's him. 1068 01:11:20,174 --> 01:11:23,414 same old top-class friends. 1069 01:11:25,014 --> 01:11:26,894 Do you care about Philippine? 1070 01:11:27,454 --> 01:11:29,774 will you come to her wedding? 1071 01:11:30,014 --> 01:11:31,974 Out of the question. 1072 01:11:32,214 --> 01:11:35,414 My destiny awaits. I leave you, heavy-hearted. 1073 01:11:35,654 --> 01:11:37,054 Oh misery! 1074 01:11:37,294 --> 01:11:38,854 Poor whore-child! 1075 01:11:39,094 --> 01:11:40,454 Please, papa! 1076 01:11:40,694 --> 01:11:44,254 You overwhelm me, chaste wench, but I must be firm. 1077 01:11:44,494 --> 01:11:47,414 My body must go, but my soul stays with you. 1078 01:11:47,654 --> 01:11:49,574 It's sad, but that's that. 1079 01:11:49,814 --> 01:11:51,694 Come on. Your father's a pig. 1080 01:11:52,174 --> 01:11:55,534 - I could cry. - Me too. Boo-hoo... 1081 01:11:56,774 --> 01:11:59,094 why does he sound like an old book? 1082 01:11:59,334 --> 01:12:01,854 He's seeking his roots. 1083 01:12:02,894 --> 01:12:04,334 who's the other ass? 1084 01:12:04,574 --> 01:12:06,574 No idea, but they're inseparable. 1085 01:12:06,814 --> 01:12:08,294 Frightful! 1086 01:12:08,654 --> 01:12:09,974 The chariot! 1087 01:12:12,414 --> 01:12:15,014 It's the Flood! The Flood! 1088 01:12:16,734 --> 01:12:19,094 what have you done to the car? 1089 01:12:19,334 --> 01:12:21,934 It's only water! we are men! Get in! 1090 01:12:22,214 --> 01:12:24,214 what did they do now? 1091 01:12:24,454 --> 01:12:27,374 It's the firemen! It's full of water! 1092 01:12:27,774 --> 01:12:29,614 The motor must be kaput. 1093 01:12:30,334 --> 01:12:33,054 we must find the sacred tooth. 1094 01:12:33,574 --> 01:12:35,014 How strange! 1095 01:12:35,254 --> 01:12:37,654 It's like a big fat cow's tooth. 1096 01:12:38,054 --> 01:12:40,734 why set a tooth in precious stones? 1097 01:12:41,374 --> 01:12:43,494 since we found these gems 1098 01:12:43,734 --> 01:12:45,254 in someone's cookie jar, 1099 01:12:45,494 --> 01:12:49,174 we'll go 50-50 with you, if the price is right. 1100 01:12:49,534 --> 01:12:50,374 I see. 1101 01:12:50,614 --> 01:12:52,974 I've put your call through. 1102 01:12:55,334 --> 01:12:56,534 Mrs. de Montmirail? 1103 01:12:56,774 --> 01:12:58,094 - speaking. - Hello. 1104 01:12:58,334 --> 01:13:01,054 I'm a pawnbroker in Bourges. In my office 1105 01:13:01,374 --> 01:13:04,054 is a vulgar woman with jewels 1106 01:13:04,294 --> 01:13:06,454 stolen from your husband. 1107 01:13:08,374 --> 01:13:11,254 Please wait here while I examine these 1108 01:13:11,494 --> 01:13:13,014 under a microscope. 1109 01:13:13,254 --> 01:13:14,134 Don't go far! 1110 01:13:14,374 --> 01:13:16,414 My husband's car got soaked. 1111 01:13:16,654 --> 01:13:19,654 I need spark plugs and plaid seat covers. 1112 01:13:20,054 --> 01:13:21,534 A mighty chariot! 1113 01:13:32,014 --> 01:13:34,294 where are you from? Portugal? 1114 01:13:41,774 --> 01:13:42,694 what's that? 1115 01:13:43,134 --> 01:13:44,974 - You want a swig? - why not? 1116 01:13:46,374 --> 01:13:47,974 Local wine? 1117 01:14:01,214 --> 01:14:02,894 It's for warriors! 1118 01:14:04,454 --> 01:14:05,374 Have more! 1119 01:14:11,294 --> 01:14:12,654 And a battery. 1120 01:14:22,614 --> 01:14:23,974 Up! 1121 01:14:24,374 --> 01:14:25,334 Down! 1122 01:14:28,854 --> 01:14:30,094 Mr. Kass! 1123 01:14:31,294 --> 01:14:33,614 Help me with the battery. 1124 01:14:38,254 --> 01:14:40,654 12 volts. Gosh, it's heavy! 1125 01:14:42,654 --> 01:14:43,494 How much? 1126 01:14:49,214 --> 01:14:51,974 Paulo! Careful with the tools! 1127 01:14:53,574 --> 01:14:54,614 Damned workers! 1128 01:14:55,854 --> 01:14:57,054 They break everything. 1129 01:14:57,294 --> 01:15:00,014 Finding good help is such a chore! 1130 01:15:00,614 --> 01:15:03,814 Mr. Kass! That is not a toy! 1131 01:15:06,694 --> 01:15:08,374 what's this racket? 1132 01:15:08,614 --> 01:15:10,294 Don't make me come out! 1133 01:15:14,734 --> 01:15:15,574 Here. 1134 01:15:16,054 --> 01:15:17,414 There we go! 1135 01:15:17,654 --> 01:15:19,654 2,623. Let's just say 2,620. 1136 01:15:19,934 --> 01:15:21,814 That's swell of you. 1137 01:15:25,734 --> 01:15:27,374 Paulo, what did you do? 1138 01:15:28,494 --> 01:15:31,454 That's called a garage. Did you enjoy it? 1139 01:15:31,814 --> 01:15:32,694 we drank! 1140 01:15:33,814 --> 01:15:35,974 Paulo is a hearty companion! 1141 01:15:36,214 --> 01:15:37,814 You made friends? 1142 01:15:38,294 --> 01:15:39,294 Good for you. 1143 01:15:39,974 --> 01:15:41,134 It's her. 1144 01:15:46,374 --> 01:15:50,214 I'm stunned. Hube aIways liked trash, 1145 01:15:50,454 --> 01:15:52,414 but she's an insult to me. 1146 01:15:53,054 --> 01:15:55,414 - Don't you agree? - Yes... 1147 01:15:55,814 --> 01:15:57,054 Recognize these? 1148 01:15:58,854 --> 01:16:01,494 Yes. Hubert must have given them to her. 1149 01:16:03,054 --> 01:16:06,694 Please don't tell my daughter. she worships her father. 1150 01:16:06,934 --> 01:16:09,894 My lawyer will repay you for your kindness. 1151 01:16:10,214 --> 01:16:11,694 I wasn't asking. 1152 01:16:12,294 --> 01:16:13,934 I'm sure you weren't. 1153 01:16:18,054 --> 01:16:20,134 I'm getting cramps, gramps. 1154 01:16:20,374 --> 01:16:21,334 Get out! 1155 01:16:21,574 --> 01:16:23,214 watch your mouth, fatso! 1156 01:16:23,494 --> 01:16:26,854 Mrs. de Montmirail kindly did not call the police. 1157 01:16:27,094 --> 01:16:28,054 But I will! 1158 01:16:28,294 --> 01:16:32,294 Give me my rocks or I'll kick your balls off! 1159 01:16:39,174 --> 01:16:40,454 Mrs. de Montmirail? 1160 01:16:40,974 --> 01:16:42,974 - Is your cousin here? - Yes. why? 1161 01:16:43,294 --> 01:16:45,774 Charges have been pressed against you. 1162 01:16:46,014 --> 01:16:48,254 Follow me. Your mechanic too. 1163 01:16:48,494 --> 01:16:50,574 - Me? - No, he's the mechanic. 1164 01:16:52,894 --> 01:16:54,694 They're charged with locking 1165 01:16:54,934 --> 01:16:57,814 sergeant Gibbon in a cage. 1166 01:17:10,134 --> 01:17:11,574 Little Crass is back! 1167 01:17:12,054 --> 01:17:14,414 Little Crass! Little Crass! 1168 01:17:17,574 --> 01:17:20,534 I'm glad he's back too, but don't overdo it! 1169 01:17:20,774 --> 01:17:23,694 Kiss your brother so we can begin. 1170 01:17:23,934 --> 01:17:27,534 I don't kiss swine. Question him, the gang leader. 1171 01:17:27,774 --> 01:17:29,854 I decide who I question. 1172 01:17:30,214 --> 01:17:33,534 - Do you know sergeant Gibbon? - Indeed. 1173 01:17:33,774 --> 01:17:37,214 He claims you locked him up and beat him. 1174 01:17:37,454 --> 01:17:38,254 violently. 1175 01:17:38,494 --> 01:17:41,974 And made him swallow a huge amount of psycho... 1176 01:17:42,214 --> 01:17:43,734 Psychodysleptics. 1177 01:17:43,974 --> 01:17:47,534 - Result: fainting, delirium, vomiting... - Diarrhea. 1178 01:17:47,774 --> 01:17:50,214 Dehydration. Right, Gibbon? 1179 01:17:50,454 --> 01:17:53,094 Right. Right and right again! 1180 01:17:53,334 --> 01:17:55,294 He's an officer of the law. 1181 01:17:55,534 --> 01:17:57,134 so answer carefully. 1182 01:17:57,654 --> 01:18:01,854 This villain entered my room without my permission. 1183 01:18:02,094 --> 01:18:05,494 Gibbon searched your room without a warrant? 1184 01:18:05,734 --> 01:18:06,534 Get serious! 1185 01:18:06,774 --> 01:18:10,614 If this is how you investigate, I'll call my good friend, 1186 01:18:10,854 --> 01:18:12,174 the police chief. 1187 01:18:12,494 --> 01:18:14,214 I love thee, baby Crass! 1188 01:18:14,454 --> 01:18:17,454 Be nice, Mr. Ass. Oops... sorry. 1189 01:18:17,694 --> 01:18:18,854 Keep your cool. 1190 01:18:19,094 --> 01:18:21,494 I asked Gibbon to search his room. 1191 01:18:21,734 --> 01:18:25,574 I suspected that he and that noxious gnome 1192 01:18:25,814 --> 01:18:27,054 were medieval! 1193 01:18:28,174 --> 01:18:29,854 He's my boy! I saved him! 1194 01:18:30,094 --> 01:18:31,694 Look! 1195 01:18:32,534 --> 01:18:35,574 Is that normal? No, he's from the Dark Ages! 1196 01:18:36,774 --> 01:18:39,334 Cool it, Kass. I'm coming unglued. 1197 01:18:39,574 --> 01:18:42,534 And Muscle Man here made me drink a potion 1198 01:18:42,774 --> 01:18:45,054 and I woke up in the year 1000! 1199 01:18:45,334 --> 01:18:47,814 stinky dwarves stole my gold watch! 1200 01:18:48,414 --> 01:18:51,654 I was covered with tar and burnt at the stake! 1201 01:18:51,894 --> 01:18:53,454 And then, 1202 01:18:53,694 --> 01:18:56,814 a sicko priest tortured me with putrid water. 1203 01:18:57,054 --> 01:19:00,214 My bladder's still swollen and I pee all over. 1204 01:19:00,454 --> 01:19:01,534 I noticed. 1205 01:19:01,774 --> 01:19:03,774 Captain! I understand! 1206 01:19:04,014 --> 01:19:06,094 Jacquart gave me the answer 1207 01:19:06,334 --> 01:19:07,694 to all my questions! 1208 01:19:08,894 --> 01:19:10,894 - The Middle Ages! - Obviously! 1209 01:19:11,934 --> 01:19:13,894 It's obvious. Only a retard 1210 01:19:14,134 --> 01:19:16,054 couldn't figure it out! 1211 01:19:16,454 --> 01:19:19,334 They're stinking rats from the Middle Ages! 1212 01:19:19,574 --> 01:19:23,774 Body odor is no proof they're medieval. 1213 01:19:24,014 --> 01:19:27,174 smell our fellow officers. 1214 01:19:28,174 --> 01:19:30,774 It's the only way it makes sense! 1215 01:19:31,014 --> 01:19:33,454 "Toil, never recoil!" 1216 01:19:33,694 --> 01:19:35,374 The Montmirail treasure. 1217 01:19:35,734 --> 01:19:38,014 It all makes sense now. villains! 1218 01:19:38,254 --> 01:19:40,454 You're all villains! 1219 01:19:42,614 --> 01:19:45,334 I understand! It's all so clear! 1220 01:19:45,574 --> 01:19:48,614 That's enough. spare us your circus act. 1221 01:19:50,214 --> 01:19:53,214 I was burnt at the stake. My toe is red. 1222 01:19:53,454 --> 01:19:55,494 Am I making this up? 1223 01:19:55,734 --> 01:19:59,054 Compare my two big toes! 1224 01:19:59,294 --> 01:20:01,574 Look! so? 1225 01:20:01,814 --> 01:20:02,974 sedate him. 1226 01:20:03,254 --> 01:20:05,414 You're all villains... 1227 01:20:05,654 --> 01:20:08,894 Defrocked monk habits! Another invention? 1228 01:20:09,134 --> 01:20:11,254 Do I wear this on the town? 1229 01:20:11,494 --> 01:20:12,694 Inquisition garb! 1230 01:20:12,934 --> 01:20:14,854 They reek of wine and cheese. 1231 01:20:15,174 --> 01:20:17,254 He'll sleep for 24 hours. 1232 01:20:21,134 --> 01:20:22,574 Enough for a horse. 1233 01:20:22,814 --> 01:20:24,854 I don't want to sleep! 1234 01:20:27,254 --> 01:20:30,294 I'm sorry things got out of hand, sir. 1235 01:20:30,534 --> 01:20:31,854 we'll meet on Monday. 1236 01:20:32,094 --> 01:20:34,374 Hopefully they'll talk more sense. 1237 01:20:34,614 --> 01:20:35,934 You are a goodly man. 1238 01:20:36,174 --> 01:20:39,334 I promise not to seek revenge on them. 1239 01:20:39,574 --> 01:20:41,334 That's really smart of you. 1240 01:20:41,694 --> 01:20:42,734 God keep you. 1241 01:20:43,054 --> 01:20:46,334 Little Crass is ill. Give him vinegar! 1242 01:20:46,574 --> 01:20:47,614 It's obvious! 1243 01:20:47,854 --> 01:20:50,414 vinegar is not the solution! 1244 01:20:50,654 --> 01:20:52,534 was your father a wino too? 1245 01:20:52,854 --> 01:20:55,974 My club-footed father died frozen in a swamp 1246 01:20:56,214 --> 01:20:57,814 on his way to the tavern! 1247 01:20:58,414 --> 01:21:01,694 You must be the family's pride and joy. 1248 01:21:05,774 --> 01:21:08,174 Your husband's on the phone. 1249 01:21:10,814 --> 01:21:12,974 what's wrong? More trouble? 1250 01:21:13,214 --> 01:21:14,934 The bum just came back. 1251 01:21:15,174 --> 01:21:16,934 - Dame Ginette? - Yeah, her. 1252 01:21:17,414 --> 01:21:19,054 what luck! 1253 01:21:19,294 --> 01:21:21,294 she got beaten up by two women. 1254 01:21:21,534 --> 01:21:23,734 They're in pretty bad shape too! 1255 01:21:23,974 --> 01:21:24,814 I'm coming. 1256 01:21:25,054 --> 01:21:27,174 Off with her hand! 1257 01:21:28,294 --> 01:21:29,494 stop it. 1258 01:21:29,934 --> 01:21:32,094 we don't cut people here. 1259 01:21:32,334 --> 01:21:34,534 - Not the hands of thieves? - Nothing. 1260 01:21:35,054 --> 01:21:36,214 They keep thieving. 1261 01:21:36,454 --> 01:21:39,174 It's hard to explain. I'm out of breath. 1262 01:21:39,414 --> 01:21:40,574 There you are! 1263 01:21:41,014 --> 01:21:42,534 I haven't the time. 1264 01:21:42,774 --> 01:21:45,814 Your Portuguese gardener pushed the button. 1265 01:21:46,054 --> 01:21:47,494 My Portuguese gardener? 1266 01:21:50,254 --> 01:21:51,694 see? 1267 01:21:52,614 --> 01:21:55,574 I see. I'll speak to my husband 1268 01:21:55,934 --> 01:21:57,174 and I'll call you. 1269 01:21:57,414 --> 01:22:00,614 Call fast! I have to pay for a new van! 1270 01:22:05,574 --> 01:22:08,094 Not while I'm working! 1271 01:22:08,334 --> 01:22:09,814 They stole your gems! 1272 01:22:11,454 --> 01:22:13,214 what are these for? 1273 01:22:14,374 --> 01:22:18,054 It's their inquisition. Jean-Pierre's the torturer! 1274 01:22:18,454 --> 01:22:21,254 - Come! - Robberess! 1275 01:22:21,654 --> 01:22:22,694 You're staying? 1276 01:22:23,374 --> 01:22:25,334 - Get to work, torturer. - what? 1277 01:22:25,574 --> 01:22:26,534 Torturer! sadist! 1278 01:22:26,774 --> 01:22:29,534 I gave you a shot. she got in a fight. 1279 01:22:29,774 --> 01:22:31,614 Two fat pigs beat me up! 1280 01:22:31,854 --> 01:22:33,694 My jewels, bandit lady! 1281 01:22:33,934 --> 01:22:35,374 Or off with your hand! 1282 01:22:35,614 --> 01:22:37,574 sit down! settle this after! 1283 01:22:38,334 --> 01:22:39,934 Open your mouth! 1284 01:22:40,574 --> 01:22:42,774 I'll make you a nice tin tooth. 1285 01:22:43,174 --> 01:22:45,494 No way! It'll be ugly! 1286 01:22:45,734 --> 01:22:47,654 Can you afford better? 1287 01:22:48,974 --> 01:22:50,454 Close your mouth. 1288 01:22:54,774 --> 01:22:56,614 stop play-acting. 1289 01:22:59,414 --> 01:23:00,614 Rinse! 1290 01:23:00,854 --> 01:23:02,294 You hurt me! 1291 01:23:02,534 --> 01:23:04,414 A wee fountain! 1292 01:23:04,974 --> 01:23:05,894 Go away! 1293 01:23:06,174 --> 01:23:07,534 I'm no glamour girl. 1294 01:23:07,774 --> 01:23:10,774 The garage owner wants a new van. 1295 01:23:11,014 --> 01:23:13,614 Get out! Torture is not for women's eyes! 1296 01:23:15,094 --> 01:23:17,134 These nuts are driving me crazy! 1297 01:23:17,374 --> 01:23:19,774 we need the gems, goodly Ginette. 1298 01:23:20,094 --> 01:23:22,094 Hube's chick stole them. 1299 01:23:22,494 --> 01:23:23,334 Chick? 1300 01:23:23,574 --> 01:23:26,534 "Chick" means woman. Hube's chick is his wife. 1301 01:23:26,774 --> 01:23:29,814 - Cora. - Let's go to Chick Cora. 1302 01:23:37,854 --> 01:23:39,454 They must be loaded! 1303 01:23:39,694 --> 01:23:41,054 The chick must bleed! 1304 01:23:41,294 --> 01:23:44,174 It's her fault I lost a tooth. 1305 01:23:44,414 --> 01:23:47,854 No one must bleed. we'll use tact. 1306 01:23:48,654 --> 01:23:51,014 If you want your relic back, 1307 01:23:51,254 --> 01:23:52,494 you're Hube now. 1308 01:23:53,014 --> 01:23:55,574 I hate to lie, but if I must, I can. 1309 01:23:59,334 --> 01:24:01,574 Open up! 1310 01:24:01,814 --> 01:24:03,014 Relax, Mr. Kass. 1311 01:24:04,934 --> 01:24:06,774 what's this racket? 1312 01:24:07,014 --> 01:24:08,614 Hubert, why are you here? 1313 01:24:08,854 --> 01:24:11,374 I told everyone you were busy overseas. 1314 01:24:11,614 --> 01:24:15,214 - who's this rabble? - who pays for my tooth? 1315 01:24:15,454 --> 01:24:16,134 Later. 1316 01:24:16,374 --> 01:24:19,734 This fair Chick is mine. seeing you soothes my eyes. 1317 01:24:20,014 --> 01:24:21,454 You are morning dew. 1318 01:24:22,054 --> 01:24:24,694 For my gems, sweet kisses will be thine. 1319 01:24:24,934 --> 01:24:26,614 I get it now. 1320 01:24:27,174 --> 01:24:29,414 Your jewels are with my lawyer. 1321 01:24:29,654 --> 01:24:30,574 Fetch them! 1322 01:24:30,814 --> 01:24:32,534 why bother him at night? 1323 01:24:32,774 --> 01:24:35,014 To make this slut happy? 1324 01:24:35,254 --> 01:24:38,174 Me, a slut? speak for yourself, floozy! 1325 01:24:38,534 --> 01:24:42,094 The jewelry or we chop off your hand! Floozy! 1326 01:24:42,334 --> 01:24:44,094 Cora, what's keeping you? 1327 01:24:44,574 --> 01:24:47,054 I decanted the wine. It's divine! 1328 01:24:47,334 --> 01:24:50,094 - Luigny! - The Duke of Burgundy! Die! 1329 01:24:52,054 --> 01:24:54,414 - You're crazy! - Crazy! 1330 01:24:54,654 --> 01:24:57,094 Be calm. He is only Thug's heir. 1331 01:24:58,694 --> 01:25:00,614 He almost killed him! 1332 01:25:00,854 --> 01:25:04,174 Excuse him. He is uncouth. He got scared. 1333 01:25:04,414 --> 01:25:06,454 You stormed in so violently! 1334 01:25:06,694 --> 01:25:08,214 It was like an attack. 1335 01:25:08,454 --> 01:25:10,374 I'm the one who attacked? 1336 01:25:10,734 --> 01:25:11,934 In a way. 1337 01:25:12,174 --> 01:25:16,134 Daddy, you're here! Everyone wants to meet you. 1338 01:25:19,254 --> 01:25:24,454 Tact sucks! Tacky's better. Let's just ask for tooth money! 1339 01:25:24,694 --> 01:25:27,934 No! we'll wait, Mrs. Kass. 1340 01:25:29,694 --> 01:25:32,134 My in-laws are dying to meet you. 1341 01:25:32,374 --> 01:25:34,574 The Lumeau-Pericards, my father. 1342 01:25:34,814 --> 01:25:36,614 He's head of the school Board, 1343 01:25:36,854 --> 01:25:39,054 and a famous expert in history. 1344 01:25:39,574 --> 01:25:41,414 That's just... "her-story". 1345 01:25:53,094 --> 01:25:54,934 Beatrice de Montmirail. 1346 01:25:55,174 --> 01:25:56,774 - My pleasure. - Good evening! 1347 01:25:57,014 --> 01:25:57,774 Evenin'! 1348 01:25:58,014 --> 01:25:59,494 Mr. and Mrs... 1349 01:25:59,734 --> 01:26:01,174 Kass. Hube's help. 1350 01:26:02,294 --> 01:26:03,694 They won't be dining. 1351 01:26:03,934 --> 01:26:06,574 Holy scrotums! No reveling? 1352 01:26:06,814 --> 01:26:10,454 That dickwad is named Kass. I'm Ginette sarclay. 1353 01:26:10,694 --> 01:26:12,254 Mrs. Dickwad... 1354 01:26:13,454 --> 01:26:15,014 Unpaid help, I might add! 1355 01:26:15,254 --> 01:26:16,814 My fiance, Benoit. 1356 01:26:17,054 --> 01:26:18,734 It's an honor, sir. 1357 01:26:19,894 --> 01:26:22,494 virgin boy, be vigorous! 1358 01:26:22,734 --> 01:26:24,214 On your wedding night 1359 01:26:24,814 --> 01:26:26,814 use your skills on your beloved 1360 01:26:27,054 --> 01:26:28,894 to give us a male heir. 1361 01:26:29,254 --> 01:26:30,454 How original! 1362 01:26:30,694 --> 01:26:33,374 Long live the young lovers! 1363 01:26:36,054 --> 01:26:38,094 Hube's very big on toasts. 1364 01:26:46,774 --> 01:26:48,454 Rich beverage! 1365 01:26:49,534 --> 01:26:52,614 Chick, why is Thug on Montmirail land? 1366 01:26:52,854 --> 01:26:55,734 whatever you heard is surely exaggerated. 1367 01:26:55,974 --> 01:26:58,774 Don't justify yourself! I beg your pardon. 1368 01:26:59,014 --> 01:27:01,134 - He acted fast! - Philippine! 1369 01:27:01,374 --> 01:27:02,774 shut your mouth! 1370 01:27:03,014 --> 01:27:05,454 That does it! Now you die! 1371 01:27:05,694 --> 01:27:06,694 Burgundy swine! 1372 01:27:06,934 --> 01:27:09,014 Kass, drop that penknife! 1373 01:27:09,254 --> 01:27:10,734 Please, Daddy! Enough! 1374 01:27:10,974 --> 01:27:13,134 Mercy, please! Have pity! 1375 01:27:14,734 --> 01:27:15,854 Thou art lucky. 1376 01:27:17,094 --> 01:27:18,734 I'm dreadfully sorry. 1377 01:27:20,334 --> 01:27:23,574 Hubert, leave this house at once. 1378 01:27:23,814 --> 01:27:26,534 You'll have your jewels tomorrow morning. 1379 01:27:26,774 --> 01:27:29,534 That will be that between us. 1380 01:27:29,894 --> 01:27:30,934 'Tis all I ask. 1381 01:27:31,934 --> 01:27:33,374 Horse shit! 1382 01:27:33,614 --> 01:27:36,774 I obviously won't ask you to dine with us. 1383 01:27:37,014 --> 01:27:39,774 And lastly: your friends are an ugly lot. 1384 01:27:41,134 --> 01:27:42,654 Bye, folks. 1385 01:27:44,014 --> 01:27:45,654 It was a pleasure. 1386 01:27:47,214 --> 01:27:50,454 Farewell, good ladies and fair damsel. 1387 01:27:51,854 --> 01:27:52,774 very original. 1388 01:27:53,334 --> 01:27:54,614 They were snippy. 1389 01:27:54,854 --> 01:27:58,374 we lacked tact, clobbering the Duke de Luigny. 1390 01:27:58,614 --> 01:28:01,454 - He's a thief. - A shit-eating slug! 1391 01:28:01,694 --> 01:28:03,534 Mind your manners, Mr. Kass. 1392 01:28:05,134 --> 01:28:06,854 I could eat a horse! 1393 01:28:07,094 --> 01:28:10,134 A pit stop at Pizza Hut! I'm starving. 1394 01:28:15,374 --> 01:28:17,094 Leg or breast, Kass? 1395 01:28:17,334 --> 01:28:18,574 Leg! 1396 01:28:18,814 --> 01:28:21,134 Dame Ginette, white or dark? 1397 01:28:21,374 --> 01:28:22,894 whatever. 1398 01:28:24,054 --> 01:28:25,774 The rich at the table, 1399 01:28:26,014 --> 01:28:27,334 poor on the floor. 1400 01:28:27,614 --> 01:28:29,294 silence, wench. 1401 01:28:29,534 --> 01:28:31,534 Keep it down. Have some fries. 1402 01:28:34,294 --> 01:28:35,654 Fries! 1403 01:28:35,894 --> 01:28:37,574 You gross me out! 1404 01:28:39,654 --> 01:28:41,534 Fries! 1405 01:28:42,654 --> 01:28:44,694 I want to eat on the floor! 1406 01:28:44,934 --> 01:28:47,094 You're a Montmirail, not a serf. 1407 01:28:47,334 --> 01:28:49,094 - Never forget it. - Yes, sir. 1408 01:28:49,334 --> 01:28:52,094 - He's also a Goulard. - Don't nit-pick. 1409 01:28:52,334 --> 01:28:55,334 - we deserve our share! - Cursed jewelry! 1410 01:28:55,574 --> 01:28:58,414 It is not mine. Jacquasse will get rubies 1411 01:28:58,654 --> 01:29:01,134 if he returns with me tomorrow. 1412 01:29:01,454 --> 01:29:03,494 I won't go! I'll flee! 1413 01:29:03,734 --> 01:29:07,254 Don't be an idiot! You don't like rubies? 1414 01:29:07,494 --> 01:29:08,894 would you go? 1415 01:29:09,134 --> 01:29:11,174 Good idea! You'll all go 1416 01:29:11,414 --> 01:29:14,374 tomorrow and life will return to normal. 1417 01:29:14,694 --> 01:29:15,654 Good riddance! 1418 01:29:26,934 --> 01:29:29,174 Madame is expecting you. 1419 01:29:29,654 --> 01:29:30,654 I'll wait here. 1420 01:29:37,214 --> 01:29:38,134 what an outfit! 1421 01:29:38,654 --> 01:29:40,014 Hurry, woman. 1422 01:29:40,254 --> 01:29:41,934 They're all there. Check. 1423 01:29:43,774 --> 01:29:45,134 The sacred Tooth. 1424 01:29:45,614 --> 01:29:46,654 sweet Cora... 1425 01:29:46,894 --> 01:29:48,694 spare me your hypocrisy. 1426 01:29:48,934 --> 01:29:51,974 I'm not thrilled to have you for the wedding 1427 01:29:52,214 --> 01:29:54,734 but Philippine would love it. 1428 01:29:58,574 --> 01:30:00,494 I hate thee not, Corrosive Cora. 1429 01:30:04,694 --> 01:30:06,614 Nor do I hate thee, Hubert. 1430 01:30:08,974 --> 01:30:10,734 - Get the tooth? - Indeed! 1431 01:30:11,374 --> 01:30:16,054 we'll go home, make hot cocoa and... it's travel time! 1432 01:30:16,294 --> 01:30:18,374 The Corridors must shut at once. 1433 01:30:18,774 --> 01:30:20,014 Daddy! 1434 01:30:20,574 --> 01:30:22,334 - wait at the chariot! - No time! 1435 01:30:22,574 --> 01:30:23,614 wait in silence! 1436 01:30:23,854 --> 01:30:27,414 I see. If that's how you want it... 1437 01:30:28,174 --> 01:30:30,974 - You get the goods? - wait in silence! 1438 01:30:33,094 --> 01:30:34,574 You're not staying? 1439 01:30:35,374 --> 01:30:38,254 My heart is in tears, but I cannot remain. 1440 01:30:38,494 --> 01:30:39,734 Today, of all days. 1441 01:30:40,054 --> 01:30:41,454 You're here, so stay. 1442 01:30:41,694 --> 01:30:45,774 I am not your father. I must embark on a great journey home. 1443 01:30:46,014 --> 01:30:48,014 who are you, if not my father? 1444 01:30:48,254 --> 01:30:49,614 You look like him. 1445 01:30:49,854 --> 01:30:53,054 I am an ancestor, but I feel for you like a father. 1446 01:30:53,294 --> 01:30:56,534 It hurt so much to be fatherless. 1447 01:30:57,614 --> 01:30:59,974 Take his place today. For me. 1448 01:31:02,294 --> 01:31:03,974 You know not what you ask. 1449 01:31:04,214 --> 01:31:05,574 when I saw you, 1450 01:31:05,814 --> 01:31:10,174 I was so moved. so proud to introduce you to them. 1451 01:31:10,414 --> 01:31:11,894 Don't steal my happiness. 1452 01:31:12,214 --> 01:31:16,014 say you love me and you'll stay, whoever you are. 1453 01:31:16,654 --> 01:31:18,454 Lord, what will then happen 1454 01:31:18,694 --> 01:31:20,014 to my father-in-law? 1455 01:31:20,254 --> 01:31:21,374 Please say yes. 1456 01:31:22,254 --> 01:31:22,934 Please. 1457 01:31:23,294 --> 01:31:25,934 I love you my great, great, great grandchild. 1458 01:31:26,174 --> 01:31:29,334 I'll lead you to the altar. I swear on my sword. 1459 01:31:31,494 --> 01:31:34,654 - I'm proud to be your kin. - Me too. 1460 01:31:38,214 --> 01:31:41,534 - They take tradition seriously. - Are those family arms? 1461 01:31:43,054 --> 01:31:44,654 why must she wear that? 1462 01:31:45,094 --> 01:31:47,654 He said he'll take it back. 1463 01:31:54,454 --> 01:31:56,614 It smells like cheese in here. 1464 01:31:57,414 --> 01:31:58,894 Feet. 1465 01:32:00,454 --> 01:32:02,334 Dirty feet, honey. 1466 01:32:23,734 --> 01:32:25,894 where is The Crass? we must go! 1467 01:32:26,134 --> 01:32:27,254 I'll make cocoa. 1468 01:32:27,974 --> 01:32:31,214 Child! Those things are done, but never spoken! 1469 01:32:31,494 --> 01:32:32,494 It's a secret. 1470 01:32:38,974 --> 01:32:41,334 Keep a look-out, Daddy-o! 1471 01:32:44,814 --> 01:32:46,534 Beauteous finery! 1472 01:32:46,774 --> 01:32:49,094 what's that? It'll give us away! 1473 01:32:49,334 --> 01:32:52,014 such choice fabric! with gold! 1474 01:32:52,774 --> 01:32:55,294 You got the servant bug up your ass! 1475 01:32:56,614 --> 01:32:59,054 Have you any powdered cocoa? 1476 01:32:59,574 --> 01:33:02,174 I need something or it tastes like glue. 1477 01:33:02,454 --> 01:33:04,934 The Kasses will never swallow it. 1478 01:33:05,174 --> 01:33:07,454 Do you mind if I have a look? 1479 01:33:07,694 --> 01:33:09,854 I'm Bea, Cora's cousin. 1480 01:33:18,294 --> 01:33:20,894 I'll be in Bimbo-bo's car. Get the keys! 1481 01:33:21,174 --> 01:33:22,534 Provender! 1482 01:33:33,174 --> 01:33:34,854 Lush fish! 1483 01:33:38,974 --> 01:33:40,934 - Forgive me, sire! - It's nothing. 1484 01:33:41,174 --> 01:33:44,214 I know you. Jacquart's brother! How are you? 1485 01:33:44,454 --> 01:33:46,214 Finely, Marshal! Finely! 1486 01:33:46,894 --> 01:33:49,174 Parking cars for the reception? 1487 01:33:49,614 --> 01:33:51,094 Thank you, good sire! 1488 01:33:55,094 --> 01:33:56,374 Poor guy. 1489 01:34:16,374 --> 01:34:18,534 Oddly enough, it's a magic potion. 1490 01:34:18,974 --> 01:34:20,214 You couldn't understand. 1491 01:34:26,734 --> 01:34:29,014 Chicklet, have you seen my squire? 1492 01:34:29,254 --> 01:34:30,374 No, Hubert. 1493 01:34:30,614 --> 01:34:32,574 The villain is hiding! 1494 01:34:41,694 --> 01:34:43,934 Can I wash my hands? 1495 01:34:49,774 --> 01:34:50,494 Here I am! 1496 01:34:51,134 --> 01:34:52,694 what's that? 1497 01:34:52,934 --> 01:34:55,174 A savory fish, fresh and toothsome! 1498 01:34:55,454 --> 01:34:57,854 we can't eat it off the car! 1499 01:34:58,094 --> 01:35:00,214 Did you get the bitch's keys? 1500 01:35:00,454 --> 01:35:02,534 Go back, dummy! Make up a lie 1501 01:35:02,774 --> 01:35:06,494 to get the keys. Meanwhile, I'll guard the silver. 1502 01:35:06,894 --> 01:35:08,414 - The key! - Yeah! 1503 01:35:33,094 --> 01:35:34,814 More bass. 1504 01:35:36,574 --> 01:35:39,294 Crank up the reverb. Damned reverb... 1505 01:35:43,454 --> 01:35:45,094 Take five. 1506 01:35:45,374 --> 01:35:48,334 Coffee break. Then we sing our lungs out. 1507 01:35:48,574 --> 01:35:50,134 Let's go, girls. 1508 01:36:11,734 --> 01:36:13,094 Down with Burgundy! 1509 01:36:13,334 --> 01:36:15,294 And we'll rip off his stalk 1510 01:36:15,534 --> 01:36:18,534 as we did the Duke of York, 1511 01:36:18,774 --> 01:36:20,894 amid his shrieks and howls. 1512 01:36:21,134 --> 01:36:24,774 we strung him up! with his bowels! 1513 01:36:26,014 --> 01:36:26,894 what's that? 1514 01:36:27,334 --> 01:36:29,094 The band is tuning up. 1515 01:36:39,854 --> 01:36:42,494 some wise-ass is using our equipment. 1516 01:36:44,734 --> 01:36:46,774 - How indiscreet! - It's trendy. 1517 01:37:00,574 --> 01:37:01,414 Jacquasse! 1518 01:37:12,334 --> 01:37:13,574 Louis the Fat! 1519 01:37:14,054 --> 01:37:15,574 Godefroy! 1520 01:37:22,934 --> 01:37:26,774 wise guy, drop the mike! It's for pros and it's expensive. 1521 01:37:27,134 --> 01:37:30,694 Aye, troubadour. Gladden us with dulcet melodies. 1522 01:37:30,934 --> 01:37:32,454 He's sick! 4000 francs! 1523 01:37:32,694 --> 01:37:34,334 Mr. Kass! 1524 01:37:35,174 --> 01:37:38,054 Lady Beatrice! Dame Ginette wants you! 1525 01:37:38,454 --> 01:37:40,774 she wants... the key! 1526 01:37:41,294 --> 01:37:43,254 Yes, fine. In the meantime, 1527 01:37:43,694 --> 01:37:46,894 taste this yummy souplette. 1528 01:37:52,974 --> 01:37:56,534 It's chalky! It's tasteless! I'll spew my phlegm! 1529 01:37:56,774 --> 01:37:57,854 You're so picky. 1530 01:37:58,614 --> 01:38:00,494 Don't move. I'll be back. 1531 01:38:00,734 --> 01:38:02,414 I await... the key! 1532 01:38:02,654 --> 01:38:04,574 Of course. The key. 1533 01:38:28,254 --> 01:38:30,014 what's that noise? 1534 01:38:47,774 --> 01:38:50,694 - Not dancing? - with you, I'd be honored. 1535 01:38:54,374 --> 01:38:56,534 Me too, but... Excuse me. 1536 01:38:56,774 --> 01:38:57,694 Maybe later. 1537 01:39:39,574 --> 01:39:40,734 Lovely bride! 1538 01:40:24,614 --> 01:40:26,574 Leave the minstrels! 1539 01:40:35,814 --> 01:40:36,854 what's wrong? 1540 01:40:42,774 --> 01:40:43,894 It's going down! 1541 01:40:44,214 --> 01:40:46,294 I'm sorry. someone pushed me. 1542 01:40:46,534 --> 01:40:47,734 It's slipping down. 1543 01:41:03,974 --> 01:41:07,174 Grand Marnier! If it's good for crepes suzette, 1544 01:41:07,414 --> 01:41:08,814 it's good for them. 1545 01:41:14,894 --> 01:41:16,254 No deliveries here. 1546 01:41:16,494 --> 01:41:20,374 Do I look like a delivery boy? I own the Montmirail Hotel! 1547 01:41:20,854 --> 01:41:23,774 I came to see Captain Batardet. He's here. 1548 01:41:25,214 --> 01:41:28,014 Captain, at last. I was in the Middle Ages! 1549 01:41:28,334 --> 01:41:30,854 I have proof! I have proof! 1550 01:41:31,094 --> 01:41:32,254 - who's he? - Jacquart. 1551 01:41:32,494 --> 01:41:33,734 The mechanic's brother. 1552 01:41:35,374 --> 01:41:36,934 - Read this. - what is it? 1553 01:41:37,174 --> 01:41:39,614 A doctor's prescription. For scabies! 1554 01:41:40,214 --> 01:41:43,334 I have scabies! The worst case of it in years! 1555 01:41:43,574 --> 01:41:45,574 - It's contagious! - Terribly so. 1556 01:41:45,814 --> 01:41:47,294 I had to show you. 1557 01:41:47,534 --> 01:41:49,254 Glorious family! 1558 01:41:49,494 --> 01:41:50,854 show him out, Captain. 1559 01:41:51,094 --> 01:41:53,374 Avoid rubbing against the guests. 1560 01:41:53,614 --> 01:41:55,214 I'm no dermatologist. 1561 01:41:55,534 --> 01:41:57,334 where did I catch it? 1562 01:41:57,574 --> 01:42:00,214 Tell me where? In a damp dungeon! 1563 01:42:00,454 --> 01:42:02,374 In the Middle Ages! 1564 01:42:02,614 --> 01:42:05,134 I caught it from Prosper the Manure Man! 1565 01:42:05,374 --> 01:42:07,614 - who? - Prosper the Manure Man! 1566 01:42:08,254 --> 01:42:10,014 - You don't believe me? - I do! 1567 01:42:10,254 --> 01:42:11,814 I'm a cleanliness freak! 1568 01:42:12,054 --> 01:42:14,374 There's no scabies in my hotel! 1569 01:42:14,614 --> 01:42:16,414 Go home, take your medicine 1570 01:42:16,814 --> 01:42:19,134 and everything will be fine. 1571 01:42:19,454 --> 01:42:20,854 Arrest Montmirail! 1572 01:42:21,094 --> 01:42:22,454 Let go of me! 1573 01:42:22,694 --> 01:42:24,454 I think you're a phony cop! 1574 01:42:24,694 --> 01:42:26,614 Have you seen your hat? 1575 01:42:30,894 --> 01:42:32,694 Drink or die by my sword! 1576 01:42:32,934 --> 01:42:34,294 show pity, sire! 1577 01:42:34,534 --> 01:42:36,614 Your lot is to furbish my arms 1578 01:42:36,854 --> 01:42:38,494 and to fight for my glory! 1579 01:42:38,734 --> 01:42:42,014 Mine is a life of peril and labor! 1580 01:42:42,254 --> 01:42:44,134 I spend it in mud, 1581 01:42:44,374 --> 01:42:48,374 trampled by horses and crushed by arms. 1582 01:42:48,614 --> 01:42:51,574 I loved serving you. You are noble and brave, 1583 01:42:52,014 --> 01:42:54,694 but I'd rather be killed than go back. 1584 01:42:55,694 --> 01:43:00,294 stand back, or I'll cut my own throat! 1585 01:43:00,974 --> 01:43:03,054 so be it. I'll not have you die. 1586 01:43:03,574 --> 01:43:07,694 God forgive me for being weak. I am moved by your pleas. 1587 01:43:09,054 --> 01:43:09,934 You may stay. 1588 01:43:13,334 --> 01:43:14,894 sire! 1589 01:43:15,134 --> 01:43:17,294 Can you really mean it? 1590 01:43:22,734 --> 01:43:23,854 Pig droppings! 1591 01:43:24,254 --> 01:43:25,254 Here you are. 1592 01:43:25,734 --> 01:43:29,934 Taste this souplette. You'll love it, Mr. Kass. 1593 01:43:30,174 --> 01:43:31,814 It's nice and strong. 1594 01:43:32,054 --> 01:43:34,654 To you, Crass. Long life with Ginette! 1595 01:43:34,894 --> 01:43:37,694 To your glory, sire. And to your heirs! 1596 01:43:39,254 --> 01:43:41,454 You are a saintly man. 1597 01:43:44,894 --> 01:43:46,494 A spicy souplette, child. 1598 01:43:46,814 --> 01:43:49,094 A burly broth! 1599 01:43:49,334 --> 01:43:51,774 I really think I pulled it off. 1600 01:43:52,014 --> 01:43:54,494 wait for the spell. I'll get Ginette. 1601 01:43:54,734 --> 01:43:56,374 "Per Horus etc... " 1602 01:43:58,574 --> 01:44:00,014 I must go, Jacquasse, 1603 01:44:00,294 --> 01:44:02,214 before Philippine sees me. 1604 01:44:03,174 --> 01:44:04,254 Farewell, sire. 1605 01:44:13,774 --> 01:44:15,374 where's Jacquasse? 1606 01:44:17,734 --> 01:44:19,094 Hark! Dame Ginette! 1607 01:44:19,334 --> 01:44:21,534 Your friends loved my souplette. 1608 01:44:21,774 --> 01:44:22,934 Burly broth! 1609 01:44:23,174 --> 01:44:26,534 Drink it, then Godefroy can say the spell. 1610 01:44:28,254 --> 01:44:30,654 It's pure garlic! Make me puke! 1611 01:44:30,894 --> 01:44:33,614 I'll never drink it! The nerve of you! 1612 01:44:33,854 --> 01:44:37,014 Dame Ginette! Look what you've done! 1613 01:44:37,534 --> 01:44:40,454 Leave or I'll throw you out! 1614 01:44:40,694 --> 01:44:42,054 Hey, Jacquart! 1615 01:44:42,414 --> 01:44:44,454 she's medieval too! 1616 01:44:44,694 --> 01:44:45,734 It's Kass's wife! 1617 01:44:45,974 --> 01:44:47,054 Of course. 1618 01:44:47,294 --> 01:44:48,494 Ask for her papers! 1619 01:44:48,734 --> 01:44:50,694 Excuse me, ma'am. 1620 01:44:53,734 --> 01:44:54,574 Me? 1621 01:44:55,334 --> 01:44:59,054 show me your papers to calm him down. 1622 01:44:59,374 --> 01:45:00,894 I'm innocent! 1623 01:45:02,974 --> 01:45:05,334 Ginette sarclay. Call that medieval? 1624 01:45:08,614 --> 01:45:09,734 sorry, ma'am. 1625 01:45:09,974 --> 01:45:11,014 Can I go? 1626 01:45:12,894 --> 01:45:14,334 If she's from now, 1627 01:45:14,574 --> 01:45:16,494 where was I? where? 1628 01:45:16,734 --> 01:45:18,614 where was I? 1629 01:45:22,814 --> 01:45:25,054 You'll give me scabies, dirty wino! 1630 01:45:26,854 --> 01:45:28,454 Answer me! 1631 01:45:34,134 --> 01:45:36,254 I need to see the magician! 1632 01:45:37,134 --> 01:45:39,454 Dame Ginette threw away her potion. 1633 01:45:39,694 --> 01:45:42,174 she doesn't like Grand Marnier. 1634 01:45:42,414 --> 01:45:44,054 she used Grand Marnier? 1635 01:45:44,294 --> 01:45:46,334 - Grand Marnier? - Mistake? 1636 01:45:47,574 --> 01:45:49,694 This is a catastrophe. 1637 01:46:07,174 --> 01:46:09,774 sire! sire! wake up! 1638 01:46:10,254 --> 01:46:11,734 I'm here, sire. 1639 01:46:11,974 --> 01:46:14,814 I'm here! Calamitas! 1640 01:46:15,054 --> 01:46:17,094 we're still here. The magician 1641 01:46:17,334 --> 01:46:18,774 fouled up again. 1642 01:46:19,374 --> 01:46:20,454 Kill them! 1643 01:46:21,254 --> 01:46:23,294 what is this clamor? 1644 01:46:24,574 --> 01:46:26,934 who are those rascals? 1645 01:46:31,054 --> 01:46:32,734 My sword will calm them! 1646 01:46:33,534 --> 01:46:34,574 The cellar! 1647 01:46:34,814 --> 01:46:37,054 we can't hold them back for long! 1648 01:46:37,574 --> 01:46:39,374 You two! Take the trunks. 1649 01:46:39,614 --> 01:46:41,934 we'll find the Brunswick Army. 1650 01:46:42,174 --> 01:46:43,654 Hurry! 1651 01:46:43,894 --> 01:46:45,214 They're coming! 1652 01:46:45,454 --> 01:46:47,014 The door gave way! 1653 01:46:49,054 --> 01:46:51,774 The door gave way, sire! 1654 01:47:00,174 --> 01:47:01,774 what cursed age is this? 1655 01:47:02,014 --> 01:47:03,654 It's black magic! 1656 01:47:19,854 --> 01:47:22,974 who are these hordes? 1657 01:47:26,094 --> 01:47:27,174 Hey you! 1658 01:47:27,854 --> 01:47:30,694 Come join the Revolution! 1659 01:47:34,774 --> 01:47:36,214 Come, citizens! 1660 01:47:38,374 --> 01:47:40,214 He is an aristocrat! 1661 01:47:40,454 --> 01:47:42,894 A Crusader! His friend is English! 1662 01:47:43,294 --> 01:47:45,214 Hands up or I'll shoot! 1663 01:47:45,454 --> 01:47:46,294 You'll die! 1664 01:47:46,534 --> 01:47:47,854 Toil, never recoil! 1665 01:48:01,334 --> 01:48:03,094 Don't shoot those spies! 1666 01:48:07,614 --> 01:48:10,934 I'll question them, then the guillotine. 1667 01:48:12,294 --> 01:48:13,694 Come, Jacquouillet! 1668 01:48:13,934 --> 01:48:15,454 Hoche awaits my orders. 1669 01:48:15,694 --> 01:48:17,254 Yes, Bonaparte. 1670 01:48:24,814 --> 01:48:26,614 - who are they? - Bonaparte 1671 01:48:27,214 --> 01:48:29,414 and Jacquouillet, the prosecutor. 1672 01:48:31,294 --> 01:48:32,454 Peasants! 1673 01:48:36,534 --> 01:48:39,654 Jacquasse, be kindly to Jacquouillet. 1674 01:48:42,254 --> 01:48:44,174 Jacquouillet? He is a skunk! 1675 01:48:44,414 --> 01:48:45,574 He is your cousin! 1676 01:48:45,814 --> 01:48:47,254 My cousin? 1677 01:48:48,934 --> 01:48:50,494 Hail, cousin! 1678 01:48:51,854 --> 01:48:54,934 My cousin! Hail little Crass! 111909

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