Original subtitles

Gortimer, narrating: I've lived my whole life on Normal Street.

There's a lake at one end

and a forest of shady trees at the other.

But what lies in between

is anything but normal.

When you're a kid,

your room is your sanctuary.

It's where you sleep.

It's where you play.

It's where you feel safe.

But even the strongest fortress in the world

is no match for the one thing that always wins in the end:

change.

[rip]

[sigh]

See? I ripped the pickle. I need a new one.

Honey, they don't even make bedding like this anymore.

I think it's time.

Oh, no.

We're not getting rid of my bed.

Ranger, you're a 13-year-old who sleeps in a hamburger.

I'm the 13-year-old who sleeps in a hamburger.

Honey, we talked about this last month

and last year and two years ago.

We have to do something about your room.

But it's taken me my whole life

to get it just the way I want.

Babe, it's a little kid's room.

You need a proper desk and more closet space.

[toy squeaks]

You're buried in junk

you don't even play with.

It's not junk. It's my stuff. I need it.

Really? Like a toy telephone?

It's got sentimental value.

It's the Iggyphone.

Iggy was imaginary,

and you haven't played with him

since you were 6.

But I still remember his number.

Bird bird train truck cow.

Iggy, it's Ranger. Call me.

Ranger.

[sigh] Fine.

[sigh]

Oh, this is so sweet of you.

Gardner could use some new toys.

He's entered his destructive phase.

My mom's making me get rid of stuff.

We're redoing my room.

Oh. Well, if you need any walls torn down,

this little dude would be happy to help.

I think I'll just leave it to the professionals.

Oh, speaking of,

Gortimer and Abigail showed me

your Young Entrepreneurs Project.

You guys should seriously consider doing it for real.

You could make a lot of money.

What good is money

if you can't even replace your favorite pickle?

It needs to be clear and to the point.

Oh, and big letters.

Remember, these people can barely see.

Bigger. Got it.

Hey, guys.

- Hey. - Hi.

We're just putting

the finishing touches on the logo.

Perfect.

That's it? Come on.

We need flames. We need glitter.

We need a hologram.

[chuckle]

Why don't I split the difference

and come up with something good?

Thank you, graphics department.

You're very welcome, um, what was yours again?

Oh, we're, uh, the business strategy development

and related synergy department.

Right.

Um, I'll have something tomorrow.

- See you. - Bye.

So you want to run the presentation?

Yeah, yeah, sure.

Ladies and gentlemen,

we're here to present to you

Normal Street's most exciting business venture.

As you know, kids are young

for a very short period of time,

but the elderly stay old for a decade.

And the older they get, the more help they need.

It's a rapidly expanding market

that just spells opportunity.

Imagine this scenario.

Oh, no. I can't read my newspaper

because my eyes are so blurry with old.

Well, you're in luck, sir,

because newspaper reading

is one of the many services

we provide at Rent-a-Grandkid.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

What?

Are we really going to charge a guy

just to read him the paper?

Well, that's the plan for our business.

It's our business plan.

How much are we going to charge him, a dollar?

We charge by the hour.

We charge more for a really long paper

and less for a short one.

Perfect.

Simple, easy to understand.

We have a real chance at winning.

We have no chance at winning.

What was wrong with the quantum simularity generator?

It could destroy all of Normal Street.

We should do something exciting,

like cloning saber tooth tigers.

That could also destroy all of Normal Street.

Look, we need something that has mass appeal.

Something everyone can use.

We need more food.

I'm still starving.

I wish you could just eat the spoon.

- That's it. - Do you think we could?

Of course. It would be huge.

Everyone would want one.

Stanley, you're a genius.

My mom tells me that all the time.

[ring]

[ring]

[ring]

Hello.

All right, then we charge more for the gross jobs

and less for the fun jobs.

- Deal? - Deal.

All right, what's next on the schedule?

A break. I'm exhausted.

We're this close. I can feel it.

It's for you.

It is?

Ranger Bowen.

Wait. Stop. Who is this?

Stay there.

[siren blares]

I don't believe it.

- Ranger? - Iggy!

Ha ha! Bird bird train truck cow!

Moo!

[giggling] Man!

You are so tall!

When did you get so tall?

Oh, no. Am I shrinking?

No. Same size.

Ranger, is, um, is that Iggy?

You see him, too?

Oh, yeah. He has clearance.

When you were 4 years old,

you authorized him to see me.

So I still don't get it.

Are you a fireman or a pirate?

Oh. Yes.

Hey, and are you still afraid of cats?

That was seven years ago.

And it was one cat.

I can't believe you told him that.

Oh, Ranger tells me everything.

That's sort of our deal.

Iggy, what are you doing here?

Well, you called, and I came.

The phone.

But this is the real world.

Yeah. And I'm your real friend.

So? What are we doing first, huh?

Hunting monsters? Flying biplanes?

Practicing our ninja moves?

Psh-psh, psh-psh. Waa!

Great job.

Well, actually, we're a little bit busy right now.

We're working on our Young Entrepreneurs Project.

Oh. Hmm.

[gasp]

Pedro!

Aw, what are you doing in here?

Uh-huh.

What?

He gave you away?

Mom made me get rid of stuff.

Oh. I know. You're right.

He just isn't as fun as he used to be.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm still fun.

Oh, yeah?

Prove it.

Let's go.

Ha ha! Yeah!

Huzzah, mateys! We did it!

The treasure of the Mongoose is ours to plunder!

Ha ha ha ha!

Whaa!

- Captain Iggy! - Oh, yeah!

Captain Iggy! Captain Iggy!

Captain Iggy! Captain Iggy!

Yes! Next we set sail

for the Golden City of Enchiladas!

Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo!

Whoa. All right, crew, that was fun,

but maybe it's time to get going.

You tack your tongue, Mr. Gibbon.

You can't abandon ship now.

The sea, it be a salty mistress,

and the ground's lava.

You're totally on fire right now.

Ha ha ha! You're on fire!

He's on fire! Ha ha ha ha!

Ranger, you coming?

We're not done yet.

What about the presentation?

What's your rush?

I haven't played with Iggy in years.

[gasp] Captain, glow on the horizon.

[gasp] Oh, no. Might be a fire on Kitten Island.

All set sail for the nearest fire hydrant!

Pull the anchor!

Give me a hand.

I'm just gonna head back.

Heave anchor.

[grunting]

Behold the future of cutlery.

The perfect ratio of corn starch and cellulose.

Cheap, easy to make, and completely biodegradable.

Completely edible.

Ugh. Completely disgusting.

Tastes like Bigfoot's toenail.

We probably need to flavor it.

No problem. We just need to find a flavor

that goes with... everything.

I came up with the perfect thing last night.

Today we're going to be robots with sharks for hands.

[imitating machinery]

Chomp-chomp.

Nice to eat you.

Gnang gnang.

I don't have time.

I have to do Young Entrepreneurs.

[scoff] It sounds... boring. Ehh.

I still have to do it.

I told Gortimer I'd help him with this

if he'd help me clean behind the oven at the bakery.

[scoff] Ranger,

your entire adult life

is going to be filled with things you got to do:

work, taxes, brushing your teeth.

But right now you're a kid,

and that means you don't have to do any of that stuff.

I mean, every minute that you spend not having fun,

that's a minute you'll never get back.

Huh?

That said, I mean, we could do that boring project.

Or...

we could have a duel...

to the death.

[sigh]

Prepare to be putty.

[laughing]

You're fast.

Both: 1, 2...

Oh, yeah!

Ha ha!

[groaning]

[laughing]

[laughing]

Hello, sir. Would you like me to read that for you?

Well, you're in luck. At Rent-a-Grandkid,

we provide a helper that can do just about anything.

They sure can.

That, too.

That's our specialty.

So you see, at Rent-a-Grandkid,

it's always--

And you can take that to the--

Ta-da.

It feels like there's something missing.

Like half the presentation?

And Ranger does bring a certain level of showmanship.

I have showmanship.

No. What you've got

is more like endearing awkwardness.

So where is Ranger?

I don't know.

Probably playing fire pirates with Iggy.

Iggy?

Oh. Uh, Ranger's friend from, uh,

a long time ago.

- From where? - I don't really know.

Anyway, now that he's hanging around,

Ranger's forgotten all about the project.

He's being so childish.

He's really changed.

Or maybe he hasn't.

Maybe you're just... outgrowing him.

You don't outgrow your best friend.

1-10?

4. Worse than pineapple

but better than tikka masala.

So after 52 flavor tests, your favorite is?

Vanilla. Yours?

Vanilla.

Pork lo mein.

Fine. Vanilla.

A genius is never recognized in his time.

6, 7. Ha. Brazil.

I get $5 million and all your submarines.

Well, guess I'll have to counter with...

Veloceraptor.

[wailing]

Hey. What did you do that for?

Veloceraptors always win.

New rule. You can't dinosaur every single time.

Help me clean this up.

[knocking]

Zombies. We need to hide.

Zombies don't knock.

Polite zombies knock.

[knocking]

Come in.

- Uh-- - Hey.

You ready to practice?

I've been practicing all day

by myself. It's 7:00.

I just got distracted. You want to play with us?

No. I still have a lot of work to do.

Our presentation is tomorrow, and we're not even ready.

[sigh] Okay, you're taking this way too seriously.

You're not an actual entrepreneur,

and this isn't a real business.

Every minute you spend not having fun

is a minute you will never get back.

But you promised me we'd do this together,

and you let me down.

You're being really immature.

I got to go.

Immature? Did you hear that?

Ha ha! Did you see this?

That's hilarious.

[alarm rings]

Oh, hey. You're awake.

I was just, uh, fixing the clock.

Oh, I got to get moving.

Super. Hey, you know what?

You should pack an extra pair of underwear.

When you see what I got planned,

you're going to need them.

Whatever it is, I can't do it.

I made a commitment to Gortimer.

I'm going to Young Entrepreneurs.

You know what? I'll go with you.

I think I can be an entrepreneur, too.

I just invented musical tacos.

Hmm-hmm.

No. Iggy, you're too distracting.

Just stay here until I can figure out what to do with you.

[scoff]

Well, someone's going to figure out

something to do with someone.

Oh! Gortimer! Oh!

I need your help. It's a massive emergency.

Iggy, what are you talking about?

It's Ranger. He was eaten by a shark.

Or a bear. Which one of those has horns?

Uh, neither of them.

[shudder] It's worse than I thought.

You got to come with me! Ranger needs you!

Aah!

Hey, have you guys seen Gortimer?

Future spoons. Cool.

Thanks. No. I haven't,

which is weird. He's usually early.

Ca-caw! Ca-caw!

Iggy, I told you to stay home.

I did. But I sensed you needed me

because our brains are connected.

Oh, so Gortimer blew you off, huh?

Hmm, some kind of friend he is.

But you got me. Ha ha. Who do we fight first?

We don't fight anyone.

We're presenting a business plan,

and Gortimer has all the signs and scripts.

Uh, who needs scripts?

I need the script because I didn't memorize it

because I wasted all my time goofing off with you.

Wasted?

I thought we were having fun.

We were having fun while Gortimer did all the work.

Maybe he's sick. I'd better go check.

Gortimer, Gortimer.

Blah, blah, blah.

Why is it always Gortimer?

I mean, why can't you forget him like you forgot me?

Iggy, what are you talking about?

Ranger.

We used to be best friends!

We had incredible adventures.

We had our own pet dragon that puked candy corn.

We'd fight robot cowboys

and land piranhas.

[cheering]

And I was always there when you called.

Moo.

But then you started spending all your time with Gortimer.

And I was out in the cold.

I waited and waited for you to come back

because you promised we'd be friends forever.

I waited for seven years.

And then you finally called.

[phone rings]

And now it's happening all over again:

choosing Gortimer over me.

[sigh] I'm sorry, Iggy.

I had no idea.

I didn't mean to leave you.

We'll always be friends.

This is amazing!

Oh, this is fantastic!

Everyone! He's picking me!

This time he's picking me!

No, Iggy. That's not what I meant.

Mm.

When I was 6, you were my best friend.

But I grew up.

I didn't mean to. It just happened.

You get that, right?

I'm sorry I wrecked your presentation.

It's okay. There's always next year.

I'm sorry I broke your alarm clock.

It's okay. I can buy a new one.

And I'm sorry I eliminated Gortimer.

It-- What?

It's just he was kind of a threat to us,

so...

Ranger's in here.

He's buried in the back corner.

[laughing]

I so totally got you.

Ranger's not in trouble, but you are.

Iggy, I don't have time for games. Let me out of here.

Oh. You're not getting out.

[gulp]

You're never getting out

because you're going to get eaten alive.

Ha ha ha ha!

[laughing]

[bleat]

[baa]

I'm sure all that's left is his eyeballs, but--

Oh. No.

- He's fine. - Are you okay?

I think I'm allergic to that chicken,

but other than that, I'm all right.

Can you get me out of here?

Key?

[sigh]

Well, we missed our presentation.

[sigh] I know.

It's not Ranger's fault. I'm the bad guy.

No. Iggy, you can't help being you.

Okay, look, you were right.

I've been acting like a baby.

Why?

I don't know. I just feel like...

things are changing too fast.

And I know that's not an excuse.

I'm sorry.

We still friends?

That'll never change.

Look, Iggy, I want--

No.

You hold your tongue, Mr. Bowen.

You know a fireman. He never says goodbye.

And a pirate, he never forgets.

I think that's an elephant.

Oh. Well, they both like peanuts, so...

Just could you promise not to forget about me again?

[fire engine siren blares]

An edible spoon. Ingenious.

[hissing]

We probably should have tested it in hot liquids.

Hmm. Vanilla. Not bad.

Gortimer: In life, the one constant is change.

Whether it's the places we live...

[hissing, stirring]

the plans we cook up...

or the people we know...

nothing ever stays the same.

But that doesn't mean

we have to lose what was there before.

Those moments--

the good ones, the bad ones,

the weird ones--

are all part of growing up...

and they're what makes us who we are.