Original subtitles

I've lived my whole life on Normal Street.

There's a lake at one end,

and a forest of shady trees at the other.

But what lies in between

is anything but normal.

If history has taught us anything...

Ranger: Yodel-ay-hee-hoo!

Was that louder than last time?

Gortimer: Ranger, I'm telling a story here.

Ranger: Sorry.

Gortimer: Where was I?

Oh, right.

If history has taught us anything,

it's that power is--

Well, it's a powerful thing.

It often changes the people who have it,

but it can also change those around them.

And not for the better.

We had to find that out the hard way.

As if you couldn't see it coming,

Mel won the presidency that day.

- [clapping] - Thank you, thank you.

All right. Thanks.

Now that I've been elected student council president--

Whoo!

I want to hit the ground running and get right to work.

I call to order this session

of Normal Middle School student council.

Who wants to hear me make the loudest sound ever?

Your loss.

What was that?

What?

Oh, I thought you all changed your minds,

and were asking to come watch me break the sound barrier.

Nope.

Understood.

You guys ever get tired of Ranger messing around?

That's one of my best friends you're talking about.

Sometimes...

Both: Yes.

Lance.

It's been a long, hard two years for the school

not having a president,

and if the student body didn't elect me,

I'm glad it was you.

Gwen.

You are by far one of the best people for the job.

But I also would have been a good choice.

Thanks, guys. You've been really gracious in defeat.

If there's one good thing to come of this,

it's that we can finally put the legend to rest.

What legend?

I was just named secretary of snacks during fourth period,

no one told me how many snacks I had to prepare for people,

let alone anything about a legend.

The Legend of Pendragon's Gavel.

Whoever can pull it free will be named

the once and future student council president.

That gavel?

Have you tried it?

Are you kidding?

I've tried pulling it a couple times a week for months.

She's even been doing pushups.

But still no luck.

Not that I have to worry about it now,

'cause I was elected fair and square.

But it's just gum.

It can't be that hard.

Give it a try.

No. It's gotta be bigger.

We're trying to create the loudest sound on record.

None of those sticks are gonna do the job.

Maybe what we're looking for isn't a stick.

You, Stanley, are brilliant.

All those people that underestimated you are wrong.

Who underestimates me?

[grunting]

Told you.

I just thought of the perfect thing.

Stanley, get the recording equipment ready.

We are about to make history.

Hey, guys. How's it goin'?

Can't talk. Makin' history.

Both: Wait!

Five, six, seven, eight.

Ranger!

Do you have any idea what that is?

Uh, drum hammer?

That's Pendragon's gavel.

Which means...

you're the new president.

President!

[symbol crashing]

So, just to be clear,

you're not mad at me?

Trying not to be.

Because you were just elected president,

and that's something you've always wanted.

And now you get booted just because I pull a hammer out of gum.

I know.

But the legend says you'll end up being a better president

than I could have ever been.

You want me to run through the legend again?

Mel: In the entire history of

the Normal Middle School student council,

there was one president who was by far the best.

She was the smartest and kindest,

and wisest leader anyone could have ever hoped for.

Under her rule, the school flourished,

and the student body was happy.

She was President Esther Avalon Pendragon.

Esther didn't want just anyone to take over as president,

and ruin everything she'd accomplished during her reign.

So as she closed the last session on her last day of middle school,

Esther banged her gavel one last time

into a pile of gum,

where it stayed waiting for

the once and future student council president to release it.

Esther Pendragon declared that only her rightful successor

would be able to pull the gavel free.

Which is you.

An idea I'm becoming more and more on board with.

Huh.

I guess I just don't understand

what the president actually does.

Oh. You get to oversee student council meetings,

and propose new school legislation,

and act as a liaison between the student body and faculty.

- And-- - Do you think I could change the school's mascot?

Because I've always been partial to the Normal Street Gooey Ducks.

That is so out there. It's the best idea ever.

No. Wait. The Normal Street Sea Cucumbers.

New best idea ever.

I can't believe I never saw your genius before.

I'm good at this, aren't I?

You're better than good.

You guys aren't messing around, are you?

Absolutely not.

Are you feeling okay? How's your vitamin C?

I can whip up some fruit leather.

He's just kidding around, Gortimer.

You know how funny Ranger is.

That I do.

Oh, and as president you have to deliver

the morning announcements tomorrow.

Over the PA? They're gonna give me a microphone?

That's what I was going to use to close the daily announcements,

but you can have it if you want.

It's okay, but I'm gonna need to Rangerfy it a little bit.

By all means.

And there's the matter of allocating

the student class funds.

My first act as president was going to be

to use the money to buy solar panels for the school.

But I'm sure you can come up with a way better idea.

Probably.

Hey, guys.

This presidency thing is so much fun.

Can you believe I have so many great ideas.

Both: Totally.

Say "referendum."

Referendum.

[camera shutter clicks]

Ranger: We have lost track of

the get-well card for groundskeeper Kevin.

So if you have it, please return it to the front office.

And those are today's announcements.

This is President Ranger Bowen

reminding everyone that there are ninjas everywhere,

especially on rooftops.

So keep your heads up and stay safe out there.

[glissando]

I like what you wrote about being kind and supportive to one another, Mel,

but ninjas.

Of course. Yours is way more inspirational.

Keep your heads up.

It's poetry.

I'm not entirely sure what's going on,

or why you're president now and not Mel,

but I have to say, that could have gone a lot worse.

Isn't he the greatest, Miss Martin?

My job here isn't to judge,

it's just to make sure the announcements are G rated.

A croissant, Mademoiselle Martin?

Merci.

Merci.

[muffled] Merci.

Kids: [chanting] Ranger, Ranger, Ranger...

I hereby open the Normal Middle School Center

for the study of freakishly huge plants.

[applause]

[chanting] Ranger, Ranger, Ranger.

[chanting slows] Ranger, Ranger, Ranger.

And I told the superintendent

that if he really wanted to keep an eye on the budget,

I know a guy who can get us realistic rubber eyeballs in bulk.

[laughing]

Classic.

It's one of my favorite stories.

How can you pick a favorite?

Guys, I'm sitting right here.

Ranger, drink up.

I had a dream last night that you got dehydrated,

and I can't stop thinking about it.

Mrs. Bowen: Ranger.

Less chatting with the friends,

more cleaning in the bathrooms.

I'm doing an interview for the school newspaper right now.

Well, from here, it looks like you're

hanging out with Stanley and Gortimer.

Ranger's mom, our readers want to know everything

about our new president, so--

Oh, how about an exposé on how he manages to get our

toilet bowl so sparkling clean?

What a scoop.

Hey. Best leave some mystery, Stanley.

And Mel will answer any further questions,

because she is in fact the one that everyone actually voted for.

Luckily, fate corrected that mistake.

That's the understatement of the century.

Well, duty calls.

[laughing]

You have such a way with puns.

A certain je ne sais quoi.

Um, what's a je ne sais whatever you just said?

[laughing]

Gentlemen, there goes the best president

in the history of Normal Middle School.

So what do you like best about Ranger?

How much time do you have?

Mel: Well, working with President Ranger,

you get to see a lot of his best sides.

Can I interest you in some of our famous chocolate vedine?

I don't have much of a sweet tooth.

Hey, sweetheart.

What was Stanley talking about?

What are you new president of?

Oh, student council.

Since when were you running for president of student council?

I didn't run. It just sort of happened.

How can you be president if you weren't elected?

I don't understand.

You don't need to. I'm a great president.

And everyone says so.

Ranger, you are so great at so many things.

Off the top of my head, math problems, staring contests,

in general, being my wonderful, generous caring son.

And?

I'm just not sure running student government is on that list.

Wait, what? You're my mom.

You're supposed to believe I can do anything.

Sure. I believe you can do anything,

if you're passionate and you work hard at it.

Just because something falls in your lap

doesn't mean you're gonna be great at it.

I mean, you think airline pilots wake up one morning

behind the steering wheel of a jet?

Nope. They spend years training.

Mom, planes don't have steering wheels.

They have yokes.

You have never shown any interest in student government.

You have a lot of power.

I hope you're doing the right thing with it.

Excuse me, but I have some toilet bowls to scrub.

Okay, I don't care how they do it, Lance,

I just want the Sloppy Joes to be sloppier.

I'm on it.

Which one?

Um, did you check with the mascot

to see which it liked better?

We tried, but we couldn't get a definite answer

from Carol the Sea Cucumber.

It was frustrating, to say the least.

Um, maybe the blue one.

Yeah, this red one's disgusting.

I don't know what I was thinking.

Pistachios or cashews?

- Any almonds? - Plain or honey roasted?

Surprise me.

Prepare to be mildly surprised.

Perfect.

Yes, Gortimer. You nailed it.

Word came down from the vice principal.

She asked for a final decision on the student class funds.

I've been thinking about the solar panel idea.

Yeah?

Instead, I've decided to spend the money on--

This is going to be great, guys.

A class field trip to H2OMG Water Park.

All: Yes!

This is the greatest use of public funds ever.

I-- I thought out of everyone,

you would try to talk me out of it.

Why would I do that?

Because solar panels would reduce waste,

and save the school a whole bunch of money.

But spending money on a field trip to the water park,

it's just irresponsible.

I'm never going to disagree with you.

Never?

What about when I'm wrong?

Ranger, when are you going to realize

you're never going to be wrong?

And everything's better now,

because you're in charge.

But we used to work so good as a team.

Gortimer pushes, you pull.

None of that works without you guys pushing and pulling.

Everything you've done so far has been, without a doubt,

- the best. - All: The best.

Now, will you please stop doubting yourself?

You don't need us.

[school bell rings]

Gortimer: I hear the wave pool at H2OMG...

[sighs]

...is the most chlorinated body of water in the continental U.S.

I have something very important to talk to you about.

I don't want to buy an umbrella.

Why would I try to sell you an umbrella?

Well, based on what you're wearing,

I can only assume it's gonna rain.

I'm wearing this as a disguise.

Incognito.

Okay, well, it's not working very well.

You've been following me around for a few days now,

and the only reason I've noticed

is because of the trench coat.

What do you want?

We can't talk about it here.

Too many prying ears.

Just tell me.

No.

You haven't heard much of that word lately, have you?

Same thing happened to me.

It was my gavel you pulled from the desk.

You're Ethel Pendergrass?

Esther Pendragon.

Right. Sorry.

Ranger! There's a press conference.

Do you want us to wait for you?

Coming.

I'll find you later.

Creepy.

I like your style.

Gortimer, please don't feed the sea cucumber.

We don't want to get the costume dirty.

Where was I? Ah, yes.

Robbie, you can ask the same question 100 different ways,

but the answer is always going to be the same.

Mexican food.

Next.

Harold Sherewoods with "Harold's Herald."

What is this we've been hearing about an extended recess?

Great question, Harold.

I know it's controversial and it still needs to be approved by the faculty,

but Ranger thinks students would really benefit from more--

Ranger, what did you call it?

Uh, mess around time.

Mess around time.

Sorry. My dad made me promise to ask this follow up question.

Don't you think shortening all academic classes by 15 minutes

could put us at an educational disadvantage?

You can tell your dad that

Ranger wouldn't propose something that would be bad for us.

Casey Jane, I'm going to ask that

we table any questions about the bake sale

until we find out where the school stands

with gluten intolerance levels.

No, I can't comment further.

Next.

You look a little concerned.

I'm more than a little concerned.

Take for instance Holly's quiz from earlier today.

The lines in an equilateral triangle are--

And she answered,

"Jealous that Ranger can't also rule over geometric shapes

"because he's the best president ever."

And look at Tony's multiple choice answer sheet.

That's a crazy coincidence.

It's no coincidence.

Everyone failed their test today.

What is going on?

Uh, I'm sorry to interrupt, Mimi.

but someone borrowed my riding mower and wrote,

"Ranger forever"

on the front lawn.

[sighs]

I'm not done with you yet.

- [sighs] - Psst.

Thanks for the get well card.

[sighs]

Hi.

I'm afraid this is all my fault.

What are you talking about?

Your friends and your classmates

have turned into yes zombies.

What are yes zombies?

They agree with everything you say,

no matter how crazy it is.

Yes. It's really annoying.

It's because of that.

Esther: I made it in wood shop when I was president.

I wanted something loud enough for people to listen to me.

But the gavel ended up having this weird power.

A bit of unsolicited advice:

don't order wood from Eastern Europe

unless it's from a reputable distributor.

Ranger: Okay.

Esther: As soon as I used the gavel,

the entire student body started agreeing with everything I said.

It was like my friends didn't have any ideas of their own,

and I was able to do whatever I wanted.

For two years, it was nothing but frozen yogurt socials,

and pet talent shows.

Ranger: That sounds awesome.

Esther: You're not getting it.

With no one challenging my decisions,

the student class went bankrupt.

By the time I sealed the gavel to the desk,

the student council was so far gone

that none of them wanted anything to do with me.

Ranger: Wait, but what about the legend?

That was started by my friends when they were "yes" zombies.

So, I'm not a good president.

It's just the gavel making everyone tell me I am.

Why did the gavel pick me?

Because you're a terrible president.

Hey!

But so was I.

It's because we want to have fun,

and push the boundaries and put a smile on everyone's face.

Unfortunately, those aren't qualities that make for a great president.

[sighs] So that's why it chose me.

It's not too late, Ranger.

Get rid of the gavel,

or else you'll be stuck with friend zombies.

And you don't want mindless drones following you around

doing your every bidding for you. Do you?

No.

Is it weird that I miss that word?

I'll leave you two alone now.

Pasta fagioli!

Ah.

I hear you, Lance,

but the definition of crudités is a general term

that does not specify what veggies are to be used.

I think we can all agree that crudités implies carrots.

Well, when you're secretary of snacks,

you can do things differently.

- Maybe I will. - Great.

- Good. - Super.

Guys!

All: President Ranger.

Technically, it would be President Bowen.

It's neither.

All: President Neither.

Thanks for meeting me on the weekend.

I have something that I need to tell you.

And I didn't think it could wait until Monday.

Zombies.

What was that?

[sighs] Effective immediately,

I am resigning as president.

What?!

Is this a good thing?

I'm not sure.

We should be happy with his decision,

but his decision means he's no longer president,

which is a bad thing.

This is the worst day of my life.

[coughing]

Guys, calm down. It's gonna be okay.

But you released the gavel.

You're the stuff of legend.

You're the once and future student council president.

[sighs] I just need to get rid of this thing.

[coughing]

I feel some stress eating coming on.

Someone scoop the pretzel out.

No one's gonna stick their hand in there.

I have an idea.

All: Best idea ever.

I haven't even told you what it is yet.

Come on. Follow me.

Well, I'm having a hard time getting rid of this gavel.

I'm gonna need you to do it.

I'm not saying it's a presidential order.

But it is.

[sighing]

I'm resigning.

Which means

you're gonna resume your elected role as president.

Some of your choices lately

have been a little off the deep end.

I don't know why I didn't speak up earlier.

Sorry, Ranger.

No. This is great.

Mel. I don't think it would be too late

to cancel the water park tickets,

and get those solar panels ordered.

Great. Let's get a memo out to faculty and staff.

First things first.

How much do solar panels cost per panel?

Well, each one is 50.

What a bizarre week.

It's like a blur.

The legend had us all convinced

that I knew what I was doing.

And I should have just stuck with what I'm really interested in,

making loud noises even louder.

[sighs] No one can take that away from me.

Still, sorry your presidency didn't work out.

Well, this is exactly how it's supposed to be.

Mel's the best person for the job.

She has the passion.

Mm-hmm.

[sighs] And we should have listened.

For the record, I did like the fighting sea cucumber mascot.

Thanks. I'm proud it will be my legacy.

Ranger, we're canceling the mascot reboot.

[sighs]

I went a little crazy on the snacks, didn't I?

Fruit leather?

That sounds gross.

Yes, please.

It took a lot of courage for Ranger to give up his title.

But he realized in the end that success is sweeter

when you actually work for it.

Plus, what's the point of having power

if you don't have your real push and pull friends around

to enjoy it with you.

And it's not like Mel got rid of everything Ranger did as president.

This is President Mel Fuller

reminding you that ninjas are everywhere,

especially on rooftops.

So keep your heads up and stay safe out there.

[notes chiming]

[gong banging]