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>> There were many different
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wars-- there was the Civil War,
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World War I, World War II...
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(stomach grumbling)
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>> Oh, no.
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I have to poop.
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Please, not now, not here!
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** (tense music)
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Miss Arias?
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Uh, may-- may I be excused?
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I-- it's just something
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really important.
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>> Danny, the bell's about to
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ring, so if you could just sit--
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>> Please?
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>> Where you going, man?
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(stomach grumbling)
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>> I just, uh--
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I gotta go to the nurse,
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so I'll...
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>> All right.
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(laughter)
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>> You okay, Danny?
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>> Yeah.
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>> Oh, my God, I can't
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get caught.
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Please be empty.
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(door squeaking open)
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Hello?
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(stomach grumbling)
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(cackling)
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>> I can't wait for lunch, man.
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I'm gonna eat so many snacks.
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(overlapping chatter)
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Somebody's pooping in here, man.
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>> Who the hell poops in school?
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>> I don't know, man, but that
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poop is new, I know somebody is
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pooping in here!
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>> Who is it, who is it?
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>> Go get his shoes!
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Get the shoes!
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(cackling)
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Get his pants!
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>> (sobbing) No!
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(laughter)
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(shouting indistinctly)
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Oh, no!
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>> (cackles)
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>> (shouts indistinctly)
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>> All right, all right,
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all right.
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What is all the racket in here?
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Huh?
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>> Danny's in the stall,
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and I just--
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>> Wait, Danny is (bleep)?
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>> Oh, no, no.
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>> Nobody (bleep) on my watch!
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Come on, you little--
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>> Oh, please, oh, no!
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>> This school has been
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(bleep)less for 30 years!
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(all cheer)
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(cackling)
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>> (screams and cries)
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** (upbeat music)
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** (somber organ music)
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>> Dearly beloved,
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we are gathered--
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>> (screams and sobs)
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>> Let it out, sister.
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>> Why, Lord, why?
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He was just a baby!
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>> We are gathered here today
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to say good-bye
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to brother Charles Price.
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>> Oh, Reverend,
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you got it all wrong.
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Even thought my baby is dead and
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gone, we need to say good-bye to
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those damn shoes you wearing.
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>> You got some nerve, lady.
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>> Come on, take it easy now.
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She's the mother of the
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deceased, she's going through
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a lot.
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>> You're right, brother.
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>> I know you need the money and
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you've been doing funerals all
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day long, but you didn't have
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to come straight from the
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cemetery with these dirty,
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muddy shoes.
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>> You came to the wrong
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preacher.
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>> Come on, now, that's the
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mother of the deceased,
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(bleep) damn it.
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She going through a lot.
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Why don't you just take a seat
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right now?
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Come on, now.
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>> Ooh, David Copperfield,
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please get my son up out
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of there with some of that shark
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tank magic.
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>> Yo, did she just say
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David Copperfield?
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>> Yeah, I think Aunt Rita's
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losing her mind.
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>> Charles Price
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was my only friend.
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>> Well, that's probably
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the truth, but we all know
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how fat you is.
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>> Uh-oh, get 'em, Rita.
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>> Oh, it's going down.
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Somebody better get this baby
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a steak before he eat all of us.
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Fat Steven Seagal is starving.
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>> (chuckles)
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>> Hold up, Boris.
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Hold up, now, that's the mother
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of the deceased now.
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Plus, you are really fat.
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Have some compassion!
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It's her special day.
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She can say and do whatever
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she want to.
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Let her have a good time.
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>> Damn, now she's playing
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the drums.
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** (up-tempo percussion)
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>> Wait!
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Get your ugly ass out here.
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** (upbeat music)
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Oh, my dear, baby needs
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a new pair of shoes!
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Unh!
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(blender whirring)
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Mm, mm.
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Oh, I ain't gonna never die.
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>> Come on, you need
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to tear him up.
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>> Welcome to Sunday school.
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Guess who's going?
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This tall, goofy-ass preacher.
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**
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>> Coming to a city near you,
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it's Rita Price, America's
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favorite insult comic on her
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"Get My Son Up Out of There"
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tour.
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You loved Rita on YouTube, and
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now, she's coming to you live.
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You'll die laughing,
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just like her son.
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>> I don't like none of you
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mother(bleep).
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I'm Rita, that is my time!
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** (upbeat music)
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>> Come on, kill me.
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Do it now, predator.
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>> (imitates ticking clock)
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>> Come on, do it.
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Do it now.
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>> Ahh.
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>> I hate you, predator.
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>> I'ma do it.
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I'm gonna kill you, dude.
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>> Predator, I wanna kill you
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with this gun.
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(gunshot)
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>> Oh, man, you shot me with a
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bullet, dude.
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I got blood on my Timberland.
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>> This has been
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"Lucas Brothering the Movies."
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>> Everybody, move back.
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>> Yeah, come look, come look.
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Let's see, he's gonna--
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>> You wanna see this?
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You wanna see a Double Dutch?
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All right, here we go!
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Here we go, Double Dutch!
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Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
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(excited chatter)
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Hold on, hold on, hold on.
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>> Oh, shoes off.
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(excited chatter)
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>> Do it, do it, do it.
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Here we go.
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(laughter)
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>> Oh, okay, all right,
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it's a good try, man.
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>> Yeah, I'm not good at these
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things.
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>> That was a good try.
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(overlapping chatter)
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(laughter)
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**
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>> * You got to get
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* Your groove on
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* If you're gonna boogie, ooh
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* Boogie-woogie, boogie
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>> He's recording.oogie *
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He's just recording.
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He's in the middle of a take.
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But you can go pass.
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Just keep it quiet,
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if you don't mind.
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Sorry, if you wouldn't mind,
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he's just-- he's in the middle
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of his take.
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He's just got a really good take
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going, if you wouldn't mind,
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just stand-- I don't wanna get
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him out of his funk.
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When he gets in the funk--
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if he gets out of the funk,
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he'll never get back
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in the funk.
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>> * Here we go
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* We're grooving
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* Come on, six, seven, eight
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>> If you just-- if we could
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keep it down.
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>> Hey, man, could you get that
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bus to move?
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>> Could we just-- yeah, if we
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could just keep it down.
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He's just got a really good
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track going.
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** (hip-hop music)
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>> * I ain't gonna
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* Hit you, boy, don't push me
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* In the hood, there ain't
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* No such thing as a good week
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* Every day, we fighting
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* And shooting, get nice
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* Things, they come lootin'
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* Show your weakness
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* It's your life
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* That you losin'
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* Now, I pray to God
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* Hoping that He's with me
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* Change needs to come
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* And I'm hoping
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* That it's different
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* I'm talking about
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* Spinach and kale
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* Instead of going to jail
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* Locally-grown peas
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* And carrots for the children
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* What's this I see?
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* I think they coming
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* And I hope it's by me
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* And I really can't lie
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* I really gotta testify
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* I'm hoping that
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* Some hipsters come gentrify
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* What's this I see?
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* I think they coming
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* And I hope it's by me
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* And I really can't lie
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* I really gotta testify
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* I'm hoping that
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* Some hipsters come gentrify
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* Been in the hood
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* For a minute
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* And I can't lie
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* There's no way
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* That I could spin it
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* Every day, I'm scared
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* And in fear, and this
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* Becomes just so clear
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* That life would be easier
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* If iced coffee was near
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* Let's not forget
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* Our teas and new sauces
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* Cut your losses
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* When you see
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* Them hipsters walking
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* Don't stand there gawking
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* Just move on
287
00:08:29,567 --> 00:08:30,767
* And mind your business
288
00:08:30,767 --> 00:08:31,927
* 'Cause somehow they lower
289
00:08:31,933 --> 00:08:33,103
* Crime with dumb outfits
290
00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:34,970
* And opinions
291
00:08:34,967 --> 00:08:36,567
* What's this I see?
292
00:08:36,567 --> 00:08:37,327
* I think they coming
293
00:08:37,333 --> 00:08:39,473
* And I hope it's by me
294
00:08:39,467 --> 00:08:41,127
* And I really can't lie
295
00:08:41,133 --> 00:08:43,233
* I really gotta testify
296
00:08:43,233 --> 00:08:43,873
* I'm hoping that
297
00:08:43,867 --> 00:08:46,897
* Some hipsters come gentrify *
298
00:08:46,933 --> 00:08:47,903
Y'all know there's some dudes
299
00:08:47,900 --> 00:08:48,970
on my block that would kill me
300
00:08:48,967 --> 00:08:50,227
for saying some stuff like this,
301
00:08:50,233 --> 00:08:52,703
but... ay, ay, just--
302
00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:53,930
yo, just get here, man.
303
00:08:53,933 --> 00:08:55,733
Please, man, we need help.
304
00:08:55,733 --> 00:08:57,073
Man, I heard y'all opened up
305
00:08:57,067 --> 00:08:58,067
a mayonnaise shop
306
00:08:58,067 --> 00:08:59,667
in Bed-Stuy, man.
307
00:08:59,667 --> 00:09:01,827
That's where Biggie's from, man.
308
00:09:01,833 --> 00:09:03,333
What is that?
309
00:09:03,333 --> 00:09:04,803
It's beautiful.
310
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:08,470
(music fading)
311
00:09:08,467 --> 00:09:11,967
**
312
00:09:11,967 --> 00:09:13,597
>> All right, settle up.
313
00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:14,900
Settle up, sit down, and
314
00:09:14,900 --> 00:09:16,500
Gregory, I don't appreciate how
315
00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:19,070
tan you got on your vacation.
316
00:09:19,067 --> 00:09:21,427
For far too long, our power has
317
00:09:21,433 --> 00:09:22,503
been declining.
318
00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:23,800
>> Yeah, yeah.
319
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:25,500
>> Our number's dwindling.
320
00:09:25,500 --> 00:09:26,600
>> (all) Mm-hmm.
321
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:28,900
>> But a new day is coming.
322
00:09:28,900 --> 00:09:31,300
The KKK will return
323
00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:33,230
to its former glory.
324
00:09:33,233 --> 00:09:36,773
And when it does, we will kill
325
00:09:36,767 --> 00:09:40,597
every one of those black devils.
326
00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:42,770
(cheers and applause)
327
00:09:42,767 --> 00:09:44,967
>> Yeah!
328
00:09:44,967 --> 00:09:46,167
>> Now, on to new business.
329
00:09:46,167 --> 00:09:48,067
The trip to Tucson has been
330
00:09:48,067 --> 00:09:48,797
cancelled.
331
00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:51,730
Brother George, speak your mind.
332
00:09:51,733 --> 00:09:54,203
>> Uh, so I-- yeah, I understand
333
00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:55,070
what you're staying about
334
00:09:55,067 --> 00:09:56,167
killing all the black people.
335
00:09:56,167 --> 00:09:58,627
>> Every one of those black
336
00:09:58,633 --> 00:10:00,333
devils.
337
00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:03,573
(applause)
338
00:10:03,567 --> 00:10:05,197
>> Right, and, uh, when we do,
339
00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:07,430
maybe we could just not kill
340
00:10:07,433 --> 00:10:09,473
Will Smith.
341
00:10:09,467 --> 00:10:10,127
>> What was that?
342
00:10:10,133 --> 00:10:11,403
>> I agree.
343
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:12,400
I wanna hate him for the color
344
00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:14,430
of his skin, but I have to love
345
00:10:14,433 --> 00:10:16,173
him for the power of his smile.
346
00:10:16,167 --> 00:10:17,027
>> I don't know if you get what
347
00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:17,833
we're doing here.
348
00:10:17,833 --> 00:10:18,833
>> To be honest, I really also
349
00:10:18,833 --> 00:10:20,003
really like what-- what Drake
350
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:21,070
has been doing, I don't know
351
00:10:21,067 --> 00:10:21,697
if you're up with it--
352
00:10:21,700 --> 00:10:23,230
>> Drake, of all people?
353
00:10:23,233 --> 00:10:24,433
>> He did start from the bottom.
354
00:10:24,433 --> 00:10:25,233
Now, he's here.
355
00:10:25,233 --> 00:10:25,973
>> Yes, I guess that
356
00:10:25,967 --> 00:10:27,027
is inspiring.
357
00:10:27,033 --> 00:10:27,733
>> While we're on the subject of
358
00:10:27,733 --> 00:10:28,903
saving black people, there's
359
00:10:28,900 --> 00:10:29,870
this guy at the grocery store.
360
00:10:29,867 --> 00:10:30,667
His name's Fred.
361
00:10:30,667 --> 00:10:32,127
He saw my Kangaroo shirt,
362
00:10:32,133 --> 00:10:32,873
came up to me, and said,
363
00:10:32,867 --> 00:10:33,967
"Dude, cool shirt."
364
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:36,127
And I was thinking that maybe
365
00:10:36,133 --> 00:10:37,203
we could save him.
366
00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:38,170
>> No.
367
00:10:38,167 --> 00:10:38,797
>> Pff.
368
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:39,430
>> We are killing Fred.
369
00:10:39,433 --> 00:10:41,173
>> Speaking of shirts, uh,
370
00:10:41,167 --> 00:10:43,597
these are very hot, you know?
371
00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:44,730
>> This is our heritage.
372
00:10:44,733 --> 00:10:46,033
We're Phantom Knights.
373
00:10:46,033 --> 00:10:47,073
>> I'll tell you what, Molly.
374
00:10:47,067 --> 00:10:48,997
I know a great place where you
375
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,230
can get some cool shirts.
376
00:10:51,233 --> 00:10:52,873
>> Chris, nobody wants to wear
377
00:10:52,867 --> 00:10:53,827
your goofy-ass shirt.
378
00:10:53,833 --> 00:10:55,933
>> Uh... well, I know
379
00:10:55,933 --> 00:10:57,603
one black guy named Fred
380
00:10:57,600 --> 00:10:58,270
that seems to think
381
00:10:58,267 --> 00:10:59,197
a little differently.
382
00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:00,530
>> You know what? Fine!
383
00:11:00,533 --> 00:11:01,973
Fine, all right?
384
00:11:01,967 --> 00:11:02,797
Fred is safe.
385
00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:04,470
>> Yeah! I love it!
386
00:11:04,467 --> 00:11:05,397
>> Why are you sticking up for
387
00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:06,100
Fred, all right?
388
00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:07,430
He's just been nice to Chris?
389
00:11:07,433 --> 00:11:08,273
>> Hey, overall, it's just kind
390
00:11:08,267 --> 00:11:10,067
of hard to be racist nowadays,
391
00:11:10,067 --> 00:11:10,797
you know, because, like, every--
392
00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:11,630
>> Yeah, it is!
393
00:11:11,633 --> 00:11:13,333
It is hard to be a racist
394
00:11:13,333 --> 00:11:15,173
because if it was easy,
395
00:11:15,167 --> 00:11:16,597
everybody would do it!
396
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:18,770
>> What if instead of hating
397
00:11:18,767 --> 00:11:20,597
everyone that isn't white,
398
00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:22,570
we hate just one person
399
00:11:22,567 --> 00:11:23,597
that is white?
400
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:24,530
>> I like it.
401
00:11:24,533 --> 00:11:25,503
>> John Cusack's white.
402
00:11:25,500 --> 00:11:26,230
>> Yes, he is.
403
00:11:26,233 --> 00:11:27,833
(agreeing chatter)
404
00:11:27,833 --> 00:11:29,103
>> Fine.
405
00:11:29,100 --> 00:11:31,270
I guess the KKK will only hate
406
00:11:31,267 --> 00:11:32,467
John Cusack.
407
00:11:32,467 --> 00:11:34,427
(cheers and applause)
408
00:11:34,433 --> 00:11:35,503
>> Whoo!
409
00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:39,070
>> Screw John Cusack!
410
00:11:39,067 --> 00:11:39,767
>> I guess the meeting's done
411
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:40,397
then.
412
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:41,570
>> Oh, wait, one more thing.
413
00:11:41,567 --> 00:11:42,697
I was just wondering if maybe we
414
00:11:42,700 --> 00:11:44,630
could do some fun activities
415
00:11:44,633 --> 00:11:47,073
during our meetings.
416
00:11:47,067 --> 00:11:47,967
>> Yeah, I guess there was,
417
00:11:47,967 --> 00:11:49,727
like, one thing I always wanted
418
00:11:49,733 --> 00:11:50,933
us to do, but...
419
00:11:50,933 --> 00:11:56,533
** (upbeat music)
420
00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:03,200
(cheering)
421
00:12:11,267 --> 00:12:13,327
>> Did y'all know it is legal
422
00:12:13,333 --> 00:12:14,403
to hold megaphones
423
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:15,770
and talk into 'em?
424
00:12:15,767 --> 00:12:17,427
Holy crap!
425
00:12:17,433 --> 00:12:18,833
That's fun!
426
00:12:18,833 --> 00:12:21,633
Officer Frank?
427
00:12:21,633 --> 00:12:24,633
Hey, man, he knew.
428
00:12:24,633 --> 00:12:25,873
(laughs)
429
00:12:25,867 --> 00:12:27,067
Ain't that right, Frank?
430
00:12:27,067 --> 00:12:28,667
Frank cool as hell, man.
431
00:12:28,667 --> 00:12:33,567
**
432
00:12:35,267 --> 00:12:36,167
>> I don't wanna bother you,
433
00:12:36,167 --> 00:12:37,927
so, luckily, I am a, uh--
434
00:12:37,933 --> 00:12:39,903
I am a classically-trained
435
00:12:39,900 --> 00:12:41,330
opera singer.
436
00:12:41,333 --> 00:12:45,473
(singing high off-pitch)
437
00:12:49,567 --> 00:12:53,697
**
438
00:12:53,700 --> 00:12:54,600
(applause)
439
00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:56,330
>> Hi, and welcome to "Hannah."
440
00:12:56,333 --> 00:12:57,403
Today, we're gonna be talking to
441
00:12:57,400 --> 00:12:58,700
people who've been having some
442
00:12:58,700 --> 00:13:00,770
difficulty in their marriages.
443
00:13:00,767 --> 00:13:01,727
We're gonna meet a girl named
444
00:13:01,733 --> 00:13:03,703
Phyllis who's been secretly
445
00:13:03,700 --> 00:13:05,630
cheating on her husband, Larry,
446
00:13:05,633 --> 00:13:07,973
with his brother.
447
00:13:07,967 --> 00:13:09,897
(laughter and chatter)
448
00:13:09,900 --> 00:13:10,630
Let's go ahead and bring out
449
00:13:10,633 --> 00:13:12,533
Larry, shall we?
450
00:13:12,533 --> 00:13:13,673
>> Hey, Hannah, what's up?
451
00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:15,297
Why is everybody murmuring?
452
00:13:15,300 --> 00:13:16,370
>> Okay, now, Larry, why don't
453
00:13:16,367 --> 00:13:17,067
you take a seat?
454
00:13:17,067 --> 00:13:19,067
>> Hey, babe.
455
00:13:19,067 --> 00:13:20,197
>> Okay.
456
00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:21,300
Now, Phyllis, go ahead and tell
457
00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:22,400
Larry what you need to say.
458
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:24,530
>> Oh, Larry... (sobbing)
459
00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:25,703
I just need to tell you
460
00:13:25,700 --> 00:13:27,330
something.
461
00:13:27,333 --> 00:13:28,133
I've been...
462
00:13:28,133 --> 00:13:28,803
(fire alarm blaring)
463
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:29,530
Oh, God.
464
00:13:29,533 --> 00:13:30,773
>> Okay, now that's just a fire
465
00:13:30,767 --> 00:13:31,967
drill, it happens a lot.
466
00:13:31,967 --> 00:13:34,697
>> Oh, fire, fire!
467
00:13:34,700 --> 00:13:35,970
>> It's a real fire, everybody.
468
00:13:35,967 --> 00:13:37,427
Just usher out this--
469
00:13:37,433 --> 00:13:39,433
(sustained low tone)
470
00:13:39,433 --> 00:13:40,933
And we're back.
471
00:13:40,933 --> 00:13:42,533
Now, if you're just joining us,
472
00:13:42,533 --> 00:13:44,503
Phyllis had something very dark
473
00:13:44,500 --> 00:13:46,300
to tell her husband Larry.
474
00:13:46,300 --> 00:13:47,700
Go ahead, Phyllis.
475
00:13:47,700 --> 00:13:49,670
>> Larry...
476
00:13:49,667 --> 00:13:51,197
I love you, you know that.
477
00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:53,070
>> I love you too.
478
00:13:53,067 --> 00:13:53,867
>> It's just so hard!
479
00:13:53,867 --> 00:13:54,697
>> Yeah, I'm sure it is.
480
00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:55,530
>> Hey, Wayne!
481
00:13:55,533 --> 00:13:56,333
>> What up, Frank?
482
00:13:56,333 --> 00:13:57,633
>> It's an electrical fire, man.
483
00:13:57,633 --> 00:13:58,873
>> You know what? Just say it,
484
00:13:58,867 --> 00:14:00,697
Phyllis, go ahead and say it.
485
00:14:00,700 --> 00:14:01,970
>> I'm cheating on you, Larry,
486
00:14:01,967 --> 00:14:02,827
with your brother!
487
00:14:02,833 --> 00:14:05,073
(gasping)
488
00:14:05,067 --> 00:14:06,867
>> How could you do this?
489
00:14:06,867 --> 00:14:07,697
We had a dog.
490
00:14:07,700 --> 00:14:10,500
>> Let's bring out the real dog,
491
00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:12,630
Larry's twin brother, Barry.
492
00:14:12,633 --> 00:14:14,333
>> I ain't no dog, man.
493
00:14:14,333 --> 00:14:16,073
Get a job, dude.
494
00:14:16,067 --> 00:14:17,227
Yeah, you too.
495
00:14:17,233 --> 00:14:19,073
(audience murmuring and booing)
496
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:19,867
How you doing?
497
00:14:19,867 --> 00:14:20,827
>> Yo, how could you do this
498
00:14:20,833 --> 00:14:21,503
to me, man?
499
00:14:21,500 --> 00:14:22,830
>> Ay, ay, ay, what can I say?
500
00:14:22,833 --> 00:14:23,773
'Cause I love her, man.
501
00:14:23,767 --> 00:14:24,667
>> What?
502
00:14:24,667 --> 00:14:25,567
>> 'Cause I love her, man.
503
00:14:25,567 --> 00:14:27,527
>> (laughs)
504
00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:28,533
Are you crazy, man?
505
00:14:28,533 --> 00:14:29,633
(laughs)
506
00:14:29,633 --> 00:14:30,833
>> Hey, can you guys keep it
507
00:14:30,833 --> 00:14:32,203
down? I can't hear anything.
508
00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:32,830
>> Hey, why don't you shut
509
00:14:32,833 --> 00:14:33,603
the (bleep) up, man?
510
00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:34,330
We saved y'all from an
511
00:14:34,333 --> 00:14:35,173
electrical fire,
512
00:14:35,167 --> 00:14:36,397
you ungrateful bitch!
513
00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:37,370
Why don't you get a job?
514
00:14:37,367 --> 00:14:39,097
>> I got a job, boo-boo!
515
00:14:39,100 --> 00:14:40,670
>> I really feel the love,
516
00:14:40,667 --> 00:14:42,667
but is it-- is it real love?
517
00:14:42,667 --> 00:14:44,097
>> Yeah, of course it's love.
518
00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:45,300
You know, in the 21st century,
519
00:14:45,300 --> 00:14:45,970
it's love.
520
00:14:45,967 --> 00:14:47,227
>> Oh.
521
00:14:47,233 --> 00:14:48,233
Let's come over here and talk
522
00:14:48,233 --> 00:14:48,903
to Larry.
523
00:14:48,900 --> 00:14:50,670
Now, Larry, how do you feel
524
00:14:50,667 --> 00:14:51,467
about all this?
525
00:14:51,467 --> 00:14:52,067
>> It's the worst day
526
00:14:52,067 --> 00:14:52,767
of my life.
527
00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:54,127
>> Oh, (bleep), a flame!
528
00:14:54,133 --> 00:14:55,873
Oh, oh!
529
00:14:55,867 --> 00:14:58,627
**
530
00:15:03,367 --> 00:15:05,697
>> No sign of the drop yet.
531
00:15:05,733 --> 00:15:06,833
Still waiting for the target
532
00:15:06,833 --> 00:15:08,833
to arrive.
533
00:15:08,833 --> 00:15:10,233
The players don't seem alerted
534
00:15:10,233 --> 00:15:11,903
to our presence.
535
00:15:11,900 --> 00:15:15,300
The sting is still on schedule.
536
00:15:15,300 --> 00:15:17,070
Also, uh, don't eat all
537
00:15:17,067 --> 00:15:18,897
the pizza back in the van.
538
00:15:23,633 --> 00:15:24,373
Did you copy?
539
00:15:24,367 --> 00:15:26,727
Uh, save me some pizza, over.
540
00:15:26,733 --> 00:15:28,203
>> This frequency is for
541
00:15:28,200 --> 00:15:29,130
stakeout broadcasts only,
542
00:15:29,133 --> 00:15:30,733
detective.
543
00:15:30,733 --> 00:15:31,673
>> Okay, real quick, though,
544
00:15:31,667 --> 00:15:33,297
you ate all the pizza, or--
545
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,770
>> All right, okay, let's keep
546
00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:35,797
our attention on the task
547
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:37,100
at hand, detective.
548
00:15:37,100 --> 00:15:37,900
>> Just give me a slice count
549
00:15:37,900 --> 00:15:38,700
so I know what I'm working with.
550
00:15:38,700 --> 00:15:39,900
I'd appreciate that.
551
00:15:39,900 --> 00:15:41,130
>> Look, you can eat when
552
00:15:41,133 --> 00:15:42,773
the sting is over.
553
00:15:42,767 --> 00:15:44,397
Just pay attention.
554
00:15:44,400 --> 00:15:45,400
>> I mean, it was my idea
555
00:15:45,400 --> 00:15:46,430
to order the pizza.
556
00:15:46,433 --> 00:15:47,873
>> Detective.
557
00:15:49,833 --> 00:15:51,403
>> Okay.
558
00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:52,900
** (tense music)
559
00:15:52,900 --> 00:15:54,430
Still no sign of the drop.
560
00:15:56,333 --> 00:15:57,273
>> Just leave me a slice
561
00:15:57,267 --> 00:15:59,527
of pizza, over.
562
00:15:59,533 --> 00:16:02,333
>> No.
563
00:16:02,333 --> 00:16:03,073
>> No one will see.
564
00:16:03,067 --> 00:16:04,297
It'll be cool.
565
00:16:04,300 --> 00:16:06,470
>> Detective.
566
00:16:06,467 --> 00:16:07,727
>> I mean, I gave you money
567
00:16:07,733 --> 00:16:08,733
for the pizza.
568
00:16:08,733 --> 00:16:09,503
Do you not remember that?
569
00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:11,230
I gave you money, so legally
570
00:16:11,233 --> 00:16:14,403
speaking, I get pizza.
571
00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:16,500
>> This is a serious operation,
572
00:16:16,500 --> 00:16:18,430
detective.
573
00:16:18,433 --> 00:16:19,703
>> I will arrest you.
574
00:16:19,700 --> 00:16:20,600
I will arrest you
575
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:21,700
the first chance I get.
576
00:16:21,700 --> 00:16:22,800
>> Detective, enough.
577
00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:25,430
Pay attention to the target.
578
00:16:25,433 --> 00:16:26,533
>> Pepperoni slice!
579
00:16:26,533 --> 00:16:28,073
>> Look, there is no more
580
00:16:28,067 --> 00:16:29,327
pepperoni.
581
00:16:29,333 --> 00:16:30,503
>> Wow!
582
00:16:30,500 --> 00:16:32,300
Wow, yeah, you got me out here
583
00:16:32,300 --> 00:16:33,100
in these dumb-ass pants
584
00:16:33,100 --> 00:16:33,770
while you're just wolfing--
585
00:16:33,767 --> 00:16:34,967
>> Put your arms down,
586
00:16:34,967 --> 00:16:35,797
detective, are you trying
587
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:36,730
to blow this thing?
588
00:16:36,733 --> 00:16:37,503
>> What are you really trying
589
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:39,700
to say?
590
00:16:39,700 --> 00:16:41,070
>> Sit down, detective.
591
00:16:41,067 --> 00:16:44,067
The pizza is gone.
592
00:16:44,067 --> 00:16:46,067
>> Ha, no more pizza? Okay.
593
00:16:46,067 --> 00:16:48,067
Well, I'm out!
594
00:16:48,067 --> 00:16:49,727
>> What? What is he doing?
595
00:16:49,733 --> 00:16:51,433
Why is running like an elf?
596
00:16:51,433 --> 00:16:52,833
He looks so--
597
00:16:52,833 --> 00:16:54,133
okay, oh, God.
598
00:16:54,133 --> 00:16:55,503
Start the van, start the van.
599
00:16:55,533 --> 00:16:56,173
>> Hey, you guys wanna
600
00:16:56,167 --> 00:16:57,497
do the Hannah Shake?
601
00:16:57,500 --> 00:16:58,800
We're gonna move our shoulders
602
00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:00,200
like we heard some gossip.
603
00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:01,270
On the count of three--
604
00:17:01,267 --> 00:17:02,667
one, two, three,
605
00:17:02,667 --> 00:17:04,227
Hannah shake it.
606
00:17:04,233 --> 00:17:06,573
Shake it, there you go, yeah.
607
00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:07,297
(laughs)
608
00:17:07,300 --> 00:17:08,730
So much fun here at "Hannah," on
609
00:17:08,733 --> 00:17:10,433
the streets and in the studio.
610
00:17:10,433 --> 00:17:15,303
**
611
00:17:17,167 --> 00:17:18,567
>> My name's Kenny Lucas,
612
00:17:18,567 --> 00:17:19,397
and this is my brother
613
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:20,230
Keith Lucas.
614
00:17:20,233 --> 00:17:20,903
And I'm gonna tell some
615
00:17:20,900 --> 00:17:22,170
embarrassing facts about him
616
00:17:22,167 --> 00:17:22,827
'cause I've known him
617
00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:23,903
for years.
618
00:17:23,900 --> 00:17:25,500
>> Josh Rabinowitz.
619
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:27,100
Though he looks like a child,
620
00:17:27,100 --> 00:17:28,130
he has so much hair on his back
621
00:17:28,133 --> 00:17:30,333
that he owns a device made
622
00:17:30,333 --> 00:17:31,673
solely for shaving his back.
623
00:17:31,667 --> 00:17:32,867
>> He pees sitting down.
624
00:17:32,867 --> 00:17:33,497
>> Yes, I do.
625
00:17:33,533 --> 00:17:35,173
>> My brother pees sitting down.
626
00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:36,570
>> Also, up until six months
627
00:17:36,567 --> 00:17:38,267
ago, Josh thought that thes
628
00:17:38,300 --> 00:17:40,230
rapper Pharrell was called
629
00:17:40,233 --> 00:17:41,073
"Farrell."
630
00:17:41,067 --> 00:17:41,927
>> (chuckles)
631
00:17:41,933 --> 00:17:43,373
>> Josh is white.
632
00:17:43,367 --> 00:17:44,097
>> I am white.
633
00:17:44,100 --> 00:17:45,070
>> Keith doesn't believe in
634
00:17:45,067 --> 00:17:46,197
Black History Month.
635
00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:47,130
He told me that yesterday.
636
00:17:47,133 --> 00:17:47,933
>> I don't.
637
00:17:47,933 --> 00:17:48,573
>> Probably the most
638
00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:50,067
embarrassing thing about Kevin
639
00:17:50,067 --> 00:17:51,567
is that he thinks his jacket
640
00:17:51,567 --> 00:17:54,127
looks good.
641
00:17:54,133 --> 00:17:55,273
>> My mom got me this jacket,
642
00:17:55,300 --> 00:17:56,570
man, it's a good jacket.
643
00:17:56,600 --> 00:17:57,570
(bleep), man.ood jacket.
644
00:17:57,567 --> 00:17:59,167
>> He'll never be Fonzie.
645
00:17:59,167 --> 00:18:01,397
>> (laughs)
646
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:04,870
**
647
00:18:04,867 --> 00:18:05,967
>> A stormy week is in the
648
00:18:05,967 --> 00:18:06,897
forecast.
649
00:18:06,900 --> 00:18:07,800
>> Let's head over to the
650
00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:08,770
weather station with
651
00:18:08,767 --> 00:18:09,567
Evan Michaels.
652
00:18:09,567 --> 00:18:10,367
>> Looks like you've got a
653
00:18:10,367 --> 00:18:11,697
special guest with you there,
654
00:18:11,700 --> 00:18:12,470
Evan.
655
00:18:12,467 --> 00:18:13,327
>> We sure do, Dick.
656
00:18:13,333 --> 00:18:14,903
As you know, every third
657
00:18:14,900 --> 00:18:16,330
Wednesday of the month is
658
00:18:16,367 --> 00:18:18,097
Weather Kid of the Week,
659
00:18:18,100 --> 00:18:19,870
and this week's guest is little
660
00:18:19,900 --> 00:18:20,870
Robert Gubbs.
661
00:18:20,867 --> 00:18:22,627
>> Actually, it's Bobby Gubbs.
662
00:18:22,633 --> 00:18:24,333
Robert is my dead father.
663
00:18:24,333 --> 00:18:25,433
Him and my mother died in
664
00:18:25,433 --> 00:18:28,073
a horrible tornado last week.
665
00:18:28,067 --> 00:18:29,127
Also, can I say hi
666
00:18:29,133 --> 00:18:30,473
to Miss Reardon's class?
667
00:18:30,467 --> 00:18:32,297
Hello, Miss Reardon's class!
668
00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:33,070
>> Wow, Bobby, I'm--
669
00:18:33,067 --> 00:18:34,967
I'm so sorry, I--
670
00:18:34,967 --> 00:18:36,367
well, I'm sure they're watching
671
00:18:36,367 --> 00:18:37,267
over you now.
672
00:18:37,267 --> 00:18:39,297
>> Oh, we were watching you last
673
00:18:39,333 --> 00:18:40,773
week during that storm,
674
00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:41,670
but we didn't hear nothing
675
00:18:41,667 --> 00:18:44,067
about a tornado, no sirree.
676
00:18:44,067 --> 00:18:45,067
>> Okay, let's lighten
677
00:18:45,067 --> 00:18:46,127
everybody's mood with the
678
00:18:46,133 --> 00:18:47,373
overnight forecast.
679
00:18:47,367 --> 00:18:49,067
We've got a high of 74 tonight
680
00:18:49,067 --> 00:18:50,267
with partly cloudy skies.
681
00:18:50,267 --> 00:18:52,767
>> Oh, last week, I saw a cloud,
682
00:18:52,767 --> 00:18:54,527
and my hamster was in it 'cause
683
00:18:54,533 --> 00:18:56,703
that same F5 tornado, it just
684
00:18:56,700 --> 00:18:58,530
came and it-- it ripped little
685
00:18:58,533 --> 00:19:00,633
Randy right out of my hands.
686
00:19:00,633 --> 00:19:02,733
And I said, "Don't go, Randy!"
687
00:19:02,733 --> 00:19:04,333
And he said, "I have to."
688
00:19:04,333 --> 00:19:05,573
>> Well, as you know,
689
00:19:05,567 --> 00:19:06,897
meteorology is not a perfect
690
00:19:06,900 --> 00:19:08,270
science, but let's go
691
00:19:08,267 --> 00:19:09,197
to Tuesday.
692
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:10,600
We've got a storm front moving--
693
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:11,830
>> Oh, that's where my house
694
00:19:11,833 --> 00:19:14,233
used to be.
695
00:19:14,233 --> 00:19:17,433
Oh, now, just go down... yeah.
696
00:19:17,433 --> 00:19:19,473
And that's where it is now.
697
00:19:19,467 --> 00:19:20,497
>> Back to you, Dick and Janice!
698
00:19:20,500 --> 00:19:22,730
>> Back to you, Dick and Janice!
699
00:19:22,733 --> 00:19:24,433
>> A wonderful child.
700
00:19:24,433 --> 00:19:25,073
>> And now, for some
701
00:19:25,067 --> 00:19:26,197
breaking news.
702
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:27,600
The last two bodies in what is
703
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:29,170
being called the worst storm in
704
00:19:29,167 --> 00:19:30,367
history have finally
705
00:19:30,367 --> 00:19:31,627
been identified as
706
00:19:31,633 --> 00:19:33,903
Rita and Herb Gubbs.
707
00:19:33,900 --> 00:19:35,930
>> Grammy and Pop-pops?
708
00:19:35,933 --> 00:19:37,173
Are they here?
709
00:19:37,167 --> 00:19:38,267
>> We'll be right back.
710
00:19:38,267 --> 00:19:39,067
>> Who'll be right back?
711
00:19:39,067 --> 00:19:39,827
>> More news after this.
712
00:19:39,833 --> 00:19:41,673
>> No more news after this!
713
00:19:41,667 --> 00:19:45,197
**
714
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:46,730
>> Hell, yeah, dude.
715
00:19:46,733 --> 00:19:48,073
>> So, did you fix it?
716
00:19:48,067 --> 00:19:49,067
>> Of course it's fixed, bro.
717
00:19:49,067 --> 00:19:49,727
That's what happens
718
00:19:49,733 --> 00:19:50,803
when you got Big Dick Paul up in
719
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,070
here slamming and jamming.
720
00:19:52,067 --> 00:19:53,427
>> Oh, God, I love when
721
00:19:53,433 --> 00:19:54,103
you say that.
722
00:19:54,100 --> 00:19:55,100
Say it again!
723
00:19:57,767 --> 00:19:59,897
>> Slamming and jamming.
724
00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:03,030
**
725
00:20:03,033 --> 00:20:05,973
>> Oh, man, Paul is a God!
726
00:20:13,833 --> 00:20:15,473
>> Who poopin' in here?
727
00:20:15,467 --> 00:20:17,867
**
728
00:20:17,867 --> 00:20:19,127
>> Get his shoe, get his shoe!
729
00:20:19,133 --> 00:20:19,973
>> No!
730
00:20:19,967 --> 00:20:20,897
>> Hey, I'm taking all
731
00:20:20,900 --> 00:20:21,930
the toilet paper!
732
00:20:21,933 --> 00:20:23,033
(cackling)
733
00:20:23,033 --> 00:20:24,273
>> Please, stop!
734
00:20:24,267 --> 00:20:25,197
>> Whoo!
735
00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:28,000
(laughter)
736
00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:29,570
>> Stop, I'm Big Dick Paul!
737
00:20:29,567 --> 00:20:31,797
I'm Big Dick Paul, stop!
738
00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:34,730
Oh!
739
00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:35,603
>> What do we want?
740
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:36,570
>> Quiet!
741
00:20:36,567 --> 00:20:37,497
>> When do we want it?
742
00:20:37,500 --> 00:20:38,570
>> Now!
743
00:20:38,567 --> 00:20:40,527
>> Got to protest New York City!
744
00:20:40,533 --> 00:20:41,633
It's dropping the seeds
745
00:20:41,633 --> 00:20:44,773
to the ground!
746
00:20:44,767 --> 00:20:46,667
>> No more noise!
747
00:20:46,667 --> 00:20:48,527
No more noise!
748
00:20:48,533 --> 00:20:50,273
>> (all) No more noise!
749
00:20:50,267 --> 00:20:52,197
No more noise!
750
00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:53,900
No more noise!
751
00:20:53,900 --> 00:20:55,700
No more noise!
752
00:20:55,700 --> 00:20:57,300
No more noise!
45950
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