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What's going -on, Steve? -Oh, it's not good.

What are they doing in there?

That is a hell of a long recess.

Longest recess yet.

-I've seen longer. -I thought the trial would be over by now.

All they do is swear somebody in and recess,

and then look at a paper, recess, look at a...

You won't tell me what you're doing,

how you're gonna conduct my case, what I'm supposed to say.

It would only confuse you.

I don't like the way you're handling me.

Good. That makes us even. I don't like handling you.

What? Well, then, maybe I'd better just go into court and...

Maryk, I'd rather be prosecuting you than defending you.

I told you that the first time we met.

Nevertheless, I am defending you.

If it is humanly possible to win an acquittal in this case

I'm gonna win you an acquittal.

If you want a prediction, I'm gonna get you off.

But you can't help me, so just leave me be.

Hell of a thing to say, you'd rather be prosecuting me than defending me.

How do you suppose that makes me feel?

-You're nervous. -Oh, sure I am.

I am too, a bit. Sorry.

I can ask the court for a different counsel.

Forget it. I don't take on a case just to lose it.

You do think I was right to relieve Captain Queeg?

I can't say that.

After everything I've told you, you still do not think he was nuts?

No, I don't.

Then I get hung.

Not necessarily.

Maybe I should plead guilty.

Eight legal officers advised me...

I don't care if every legal officer in the Navy says otherwise,

I think I can get you off.

This is a whole foul up.

You'll do nobly. You may come out of this a great naval hero.

Greenwald, is something eating at you?

I used to daydream about a court-martial coming up

and some poor Joe would be defending,

and I'd step in, take over, twist the Navy's arm,

make it holler Uncle.

Well, now here's my dream come true. You know something?

I don't look forward to twisting the Navy's arm. Not one bit.

-Scared of the brass, huh? -Worse.

-What? -Respectful.

Ah, look, I put in for transfer to the regulars. I respect the Navy, too.

It's just... I don't know, Maryk.

I'm a damn good lawyer and I'm a pretty poor...

We're spending excessive time on all these recesses.

I appreciate your wanting to have the record letter perfect.

I think there is a big pile of foolishness connected with the Navy.

In fact, sometimes I think that the Navy is just a master plan

designed by geniuses for execution by idiots.

You think what?

That the Navy is just a master plan

designed by geniuses for execution by idiots.

Where'd you hear that?

Couldn't I have just made it up?

You could have just made up the Gettysburg address, too.

Where'd you hear it?

Well, as a matter of fact, it's one of Tom Keefer's favorite cracks.

Ah, yes. You echo your novelist friend quite a bit, don't you?

Well, let's get on with the case,

keep thetechnicalities to a minimum.

Aye, aye, sir.

Well, here we go.

Better you did it out of your own noble judgment

than you took the advice of a sensitive novelist.

Attention!

Court is in session.

Court finds the charge and specification in due form and technically correct.

Is the accused -ready for trial? -Yes, sir.

"Charge. Conduct to the prejudice of good order and discipline.

"Specification. In that Lieutenant Stephen Maryk, USNR,

"did, on or about 18 December, 1944, aboard the USS Caine,

"willfully, without proper authority and without justifiable cause,

"did relieve from his duty as commanding officer,

"Lieutenant Commander Philip Francis Queeg, USN,

"the duly assigned commanding officer of said ship,

"who was then and there in lawful exercise of his command,

"the United States then being in a state of war."

Stephen Maryk, Lieutenant, United States Naval Reserve,

you have heard the charge and specification preferred against you.

-How say you? -Not guilty.

Guilty or not guilty?

Not guilty.

Judge advocate, present your case.

Call Lieutenant Commander Queeg.

Lieutenant Commander Queeg.

This guy had a ship we used to call the USS Purgatory.

You do solemnly swear the evidence you shall give in this court

shall be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth,

-so help you God? -I do.

State your name, rank and present position.

Philip Frances Queeg, Lieutenant Commander, United States Navy,

temporarily assigned to commandant,

12th Naval District, awaiting reassignment by Bupers.

If you recognize the accused, state as whom.

Lieutenant Stephen Maryk, USNR.

Commander Queeg, on December 18, 1944,

were you in command of the USS Caine?

-I was. -What type of vessel is the Caine?

Her official designation is high-speed mine-sweeper.

What she is, is a four-piper,

one of those flush deck, 1,200 ton destroyers from World War One,

fixed up with -mine-sweeping gear. An old ship, then?

I guess about the oldest type still doing combat duty.

What is her primary mission?

Well, that's a hard one.

These old buckets are regarded as pretty expendable.

By and large, we were doing the usual destroyer duty,

anti-submarine screening, also ran the mail, transported marines,

carried aviation gas and torpedoes,

gave fire support in minor landings, or what have you.

Also swept mines now and then.

Commander, on December 18, 1944,

were you relieved of command of the Caine?

-Yes. -By whom?

-By the accused. -Was this a regular relief?

It was totally irregular, sir.

How would you describe it?

The most charitable description would be that it was an incident,

a regrettable incident of temporary and total collapse of military discipline.

Commander, please relate all the facts that bear on this unauthorized relief.

Okay.

I'll try to do this consecutively, here.

We sortied, the Caine, sortied, from Ulithi Atoll on the 16th of December.

I believe the 15th or the 16th.

We were a screening vessel with a group of fleet oilers.

Our mission was to rendezvous with and refuel

Admiral Halsey's fast carrier force in the Philippine Sea.

Okay. Well, we made the rendezvous,

and then this typhoon came along.

The fueling was broken off and the fleet began to maneuver to evade the storm.

Now, the storm was traveling due west,

so Admiral Halsey set fleet course due south,

and we began to make a run for the safe semi-circle.

What was the date and time of that course change?

That would be the morning of the 18th, sir.

Well, uh, as I say, visibility was almost zero.

The storm was pretty bad at this point.

Couldn't see the guide or even the next ship in the screen.

We were just steaming blindly through rain and spray.

And, of course, with the wind and sea and all,

we had to maneuver pretty smartly

with engines and rudder to hold fleet course and speed.

But we were doing fine.

My executive officer, however, pretty early in the game began to show

unusual symptoms of nervousness.

What were these symptoms of nervousness?

Well, for instance, he began talking very early,

oh, it couldn't have been half an hour after the fleet started to run south,

that we should operate independently and come around north.

And why would he want to do that?

To give you a picture on that.

You see, the typhoon was coming at us from the east,

and we were on the western edge of it.

Now, as you know, these blows spin counter-clockwise above the equator.

That means where we were, the wind was coming from due north.

Admiral Halsey, of course, was running south, with the wind,

to get out of the storm's path.

Now this is in accordance with all existing storm doctrine from Bowditch on up.

But my exec insisted that the ship was on the verge of foundering,

and that we had better come around and head into the wind,

that is, north, if we were to survive.

Of course we weren't in any such bad shape at all.

And that's what I mean by nervousness.

What was your objection to coming north, as your executive officer suggested?

Why, everything was wrong with that idea that could be wrong with it, sir.

In the first place, my orders were to proceed south.

My mission was screening.

My ship was in no danger and was functioning normally.

Why, to drop out of station

and act independently under those conditions was unthinkable.

Coming around to north

would have headed the ship directly into the heart of the typhoon.

It was not only a senseless suggestion,

in the circumstances, it was almost suicidal.

And, I might add, I have since checked my decisions of December 18th

with the finest ship handlers I know,

up to the rank of rear admiral,

and they've all Commander...

...that the only course in that situation

-was south! -Your last remark...

Commander, your last remark was hearsay evidence. That is not acceptable.

I'm sorry, sir. I'm not up on these legal distinctions

as much as I should be, I guess.

Perfectly all right.

Does the defense counsel move to strike out that part of the testimony

that was hearsay evidence?

All right, sir, -I so move. -No objection.

A ship-handling expert will be called to testify on that point, Commander.

I see, and I'm very glad to know that, sir. Thank you.

Proceed with your description of the relief.

Okay.

Well, it's just that

Maryk kept insisting on coming north,

more and more stridently as the weather deteriorated.

Finally, I began to be a little concerned about him.

Suddenly he walked up to me out of the clear sky

and told me I was on the sick list and he was relieving me.

It was only when I heard him shouting orders at the officer of the deck

[CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]and countermanding my instructions to the helm

that I began to realize what was going on.

Commander, can you recall anything at all

in your own bearing or manner that could

have provoked your executive officer's act?

Well, truthfully, sir, I cannot.

Frankly, I don't think my bearing or manner had anything to do with it.

It was a pretty scary situation at the wheelhouse.

The wind was force 10 to 12, screeching and all that.

The waves were mountainous.

The barometer was about as low as it's ever been in the US Navy history.

We took one very bad roll, and I mean a bad one,

and I've done a lot of North Atlantic rolling, too.

Well, I think Maryk simply went into panic.

Was the Cainein grave danger at that moment?

Oh, oh, no, I wouldn't say that. No, sir.

We righted very nicely from that bad roll.

He repeatedly tried to order me off the bridge,

but I stayed right where I was.

I only gave him orders when it seemed necessary for the safety of the ship.

In the situation,

I thought the chief hazard was any further acts of frenzy on his part.

And to the extent that the Cainedid come safely through the storm,

despite this unprecedented running amuck of my executive officer,

I believe my handling of the emergency was the correct one.

Did Mr. Maryk cite any authority at all when he relieved you?

Oh, he mumbled something about Article 184.

I didn't even catch it at the time.

Later, he said his authority came from Articles 184, 185 and 186

of the Navy regulations.

Are you familiar -with these articles? Certainly.

In substance, what do they provide?

Well, as I understand it, they make it possible for

an executive officer to take over in an emergency.

A highly unusual emergency, where the Captain is...

Well, frankly, where the Captain's gone absolutely and hopelessly loony.

Were these articles properly invoked in your situation?

Well, I'm sort of an interested party here.

But you won't have to take my word for it.

I was successfully conning my ship through a typhoon.

Fortunately, there are 130 witnesses to that fact,

every man who was aboard that ship.

There, again, sir, you're testifying to the conclusions of others.

Strike the last sentence of -the answer from the record. -I'm sorry.

I'm obviously no legal expert.

I'll withdraw the sentence.

Have you ever been mentally ill, sir?

No, sir.

Were you ill in any way when Mr. Maryk relieved you?

I was not.

Did you warn your executive officer of the consequences of his act?

I told him he was performing a mutinous act.

What was his reply?

That he expected to be court-martialed,

but was going to retain command anyway.

What was the attitude of Lieutenant Junior Grade Keith, the officer of the deck?

He was in a state of panic as bad as Maryk's.

What was the attitude of the helmsman?

Stilwell was emotionally unbalanced,

and for some reason was very devoted to Mr. Keith.

They both backed up Maryk.

Is there anything else you care to state, Commander,

in connection with the events of December 18 aboard the Caine?

Well, I've thought a lot about it all, of course.

It's the gravest occurrence of my career,

and the only questionable one that I'm aware of.

It was an unfortunate freak accident.

If the OOD had been anyone but this immature Keith,

and the helmsman anyone but Stilwell,

I don't think it would have happened.

A confident officer of the deck would have repudiated Maryk's orders.

And a normal sailor at the helm would have disregarded both officers and obeyed me.

It was just bad luck that these three men, Maryk, Keith and Stilwell

were combined against me at a crucial time.

Bad luck for me, and I'm afraid worse luck for them.

Court would like to question the witness.

Commander, you've taken all the prescribed physical and mental examinations

incident to entrance to the Academy,

graduation, commissioning, promotions and so forth?

Yes, sir, for 14 years.

Does your medical record contain any history of illness, mental or physical?

It does not, sir. My tonsils were removed in the fall of 1938.

Have you ever had an unsatisfactory fitness report, Commander?

Negative, sir. I have one letter of commendation in my jacket.

Commander, can you account for Lieutenant Maryk's opinion

that you were mentally ill?

Well, sir, that's rather a tough one.

Well, I appreciate that, but I think it might be helpful.

Well, sir,

I will say that I did assume command of an extremely disorganized and dirty ship.

Now that's no reflection on the officer I relieved.

The Cainehad had a year and a half of the most arduous combat duty

and it was understandable.

Still, the safety of that ship and its crew demanded its being brought up to snuff.

I took many stern measures.

Lieutenant Maryk, I may say, from the first,

never saw eye to eye with me at all on the idea

of making the Caine a taut ship again.

Maybe he thought I was crazy to keep trying.

I guess that's the picture, sir.

No more questions.

Commander Queeg, I should like to ask you whether you have ever heard

the expression "Old Yellow Stain"?

-In what connection? -In any connection.

Old Yellow Stone?

Old Yellow Stain, sir.

I have not.

You are not aware, then, that all the officers of the Caine

habitually referred to you as Old Yellow Stain?

I object to the question. This is impertinent badgering of the witness.

How does Defense Counsel Greenwald justify this line of questioning?

If it please the court, the nickname Old Yellow Stain

used by the officers of the Cainewill be

relevant to the issue of mental competence, sir.

Before ruling, the court would like to caution defense counsel.

This is a most unusual and delicate case.

The honor and career of an officer with

an unblemished record of 14 years standing is involved here.

Defense counsel will have to take full responsibility for the conduct of this case.

Subject to the foregoing comment, the judge advocate's objection is overruled.

The stenographer will repeat the question.

"You are not aware, then, that all the officers of the Caine

"habitually referred to you as Old Yellow Stain?"

I'm not aware of it.

No further questions at this time.

Is that the extent of your cross-examination, Lieutenant Greenwald?

Commander Queeg will be called as a witness for the defense, sir.

For the defense?

Yes, sir.

Commander, you will refrain from conversing with any person, whomsoever,

regarding your testimony here today.

Aye, sir.

You're excused, and thank you.

Thank you, Captain.

Call Lieutenant Thomas Keefer.

Lieutenant Thomas Keefer.

How do I look?

Like an idiot.

Give 'em hell, Tom.

I'm glad he's -here to testify. You are?

Hell, he knows everything Captain Queeg did.

You do solemnly swear the evidence you shall give in this court

shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth,

-so help you God? -I do so swear.

Tom Keefer will tell the things straight.

If I had my way, Lieutenant Thomas Keefer

would never appear in this courtroom.

State your name, rank and present station.

Thomas Keefer, Lieutenant USNR,

communication officer of the USS Caine.

If you recognize the accused, state as whom.

Steve Maryk, Lieutenant Stephen Maryk,

executive officer of the Caine.

What is your occupation in civilian life?

I'm a writer.

And has your work been published?

A number of my short stories have been published, yes, sir.

In national magazines.

Have you done any writing in your spare time while in service?

I've completed half a war novel.

What is the title? Multitudes, Multitudes.

What was that? Multitudes, Multitudes,sir.

Oh, thank you.

And has this novel Multitudes, Multitudes, though incomplete,

recently been accepted by a New York publisher?

Yes.

I'm asking these questions to establish your reliability

as an observer of personalities.

I understand, sir.

Now, Lieutenant Keefer, were you serving aboard the Caineon December 18, 1944,

-in your present capacity? Yes.

Was Captain Queeg relieved of command on that date?

-He was, sir. -By whom?

The accused.

Describe how you learned the Captain had been relieved.

Well, Mr. Maryk passed over the loudspeaker

for all officers to lay up to the wheelhouse.

When we got there, he told us that the Captain was sick

and that he had assumed command.

Did Captain Queeg exhibit any external signs of being sick?

Well, at the height of a typhoon nobody aboard a four-piper looks very well.

Was he raving, -or foaming? -No.

Did he look any worse, -say, than Lieutenant Keith? -No.

Or Maryk?

Well, we were all tired and dripping and just knocked out.

Mr. Keefer, did you make any effort to persuade Maryk to restore Queeg to command?

I did not.

Didn't you feel the seriousness of the situation?

I certainly did, sir.

Well, why'd you take no remedial action?

I wasn't present when the Captain was relieved. Maryk was in full command.

The entire ship was obeying his orders.

I decided that for the safety of the entire ship

my best course was to obey his orders. That was what I did.

Now, Mr. Keefer, were you aboard the Caine

throughout the period Captain Queeg was in command?

I was.

Did you ever observe any evidence of insanity in him?

I don't... I can't answer that question, not being a psychiatrist.

Well, surely now, Mr. Keefer, as a writer,

you're not wholly ignorant of such matters.

Well, not wholly ignorant, I hope not, sir.

What, for example, is a Rorschach Test?

I believe that's the inkblot test.

The analyst detects psychopathic tendencies in a person

by showing him inkblots and getting the person

to say what the shapes resemble.

And who's Alfred Adler?

Well, these things are very elementary. Adler split from Freud.

Any college man can tell you that much, sir.

A novelist, however, is apt to understand and appreciate these things

more than the average man.

Well, our work is in the narration of human conduct.

Naturally.

Now, Mr. Keefer, with your grasp of such matters,

if you see a man rushing up and down passageways

screaming that a tiger is after him when there is no tiger,

would you venture to say the man was temporarily deranged?

I would, sir.

Did Captain Queeg ever exhibit such behavior?

No. Nothing like that.

Did you ever think he may be insane?

Did you ever think he might be insane?

Objection. The witness isn't an expert.

I withdraw the question.

Now, Mr. Keefer, were you informed at any time prior to December 18

that Mr. Maryk suspected Queeg of being mentally ill?

-Yes, sir. -Describe how you learned this fact.

Now let me see.

Two weeks before the typhoon, Maryk showed me a medical log

he'd kept on Queeg's behavior.

He asked me to come with him to the New Jersey

to report the situation to Admiral Halsey.

Did you consent -to go with him? -Yes, I did.

Why?

He was my executive officer

and my close friend.

Did you believe the log justified the relief of Captain Queeg?

No. No.

When we arrived aboard the New Jersey

I told him as forcibly as I could

that the log would not justify the action.

What was his response?

Well, after a lot of arguing,

he followed my advice. We returned to the Caine.

Were you surprised then two weeks later when he relieved the Captain?

I was flabbergasted.

Lieutenant, speak up so the court can hear you.

I was flabbergasted, sir.

Were you pleased, Mr. Keefer?

No.

I was badly disturbed.

We still can't hear you, Lieutenant.

I was badly disturbed, sir.

I thought at best he would be in grave difficulties.

It was a terrible situation.

No further questions.

No questions at this time.

Does defense counsel intend to recall this witness at a later date?

No, sir.

No cross-examination of this highly material witness?

No, sir.

The court will question the witness.

Now, Mr. Keefer, as to this so-called medical log,

the facts are contained which convinced Lieutenant Maryk

that he should report the Captain to Admiral Halsey,

didn't convince you. Is that right?

-They did not, sir. -Why not?

Sir, speaking from ignorance...

It's always seemed to me that mental disability was a relative thing.

Captain Queeg was a very strict disciplinarian

and extremely meticulous at hunting down small matters.

There were several occasions where I thought he bore down too hard

and those were the things that were recorded in the medical log.

They were very unpleasant.

But to jump from them to a conclusion that the Captain was a maniac, no.

No, in all honesty I was against Maryk doing that.

No further questions.

You'll not discuss your testimony outside of this courtroom.

Witness excused.

Why didn't you cross-examine Tom Keefer?

Why'd you let him off like that?

Call Signalman Third Class Urban.

Signalman Third Class Urban.

Just tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Excuse me, sir. Sir.

Damn it, he should have talked himself.

Sure he should. You don't understand, do you?

Come up here and be sworn in, son.

You do solemnly swear the evidence you shall give in this court

shall be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth,

-so help you God? -Aye, sir.

State your name, rank and present position.

Junius Hannerford Urban, Signalman, Third Class, USN of the USS Caine,sir.

If you recognize the accused, state as whom.

Sir?

Do you recognize the officer at that table?

Which one, sir? There are four.

Name the one you recognize.

Well, that's the exec, sir.

His name?

He's Mr. Maryk.

What's he the exec of?

Well, the ship.

Name the ship.

The Caine.

Thank you.

Sorry, sir.

Urban, were you serving aboard the Cainein your present capacity on 18 December, 1944?

Sure, I was aboard, sir.

Were you in the pilot house when Lieutenant Maryk relieved Captain Queeg?

Yes, sir.

Who else was in the wheelhouse at the time?

Well, there was the Captain and Mr. Maryk, sir.

Yes.

And the helmsman.

His name?

Stilwell.

Who else?

-The OOD. -His name?

Mr. Keith.

What were you doing in the wheelhouse at the time?

Well, I had the watch, sir.

Urban, describe, in your own words,

how Lieutenant Maryk relieved Captain Queeg.

Well, he said, "I relieve you, sir."

What was happening at the time?

Well, the ship was rolling very bad.

Urban, describe everything that happened

in the 10 minutes before the Captain was relieved.

Well, like I say, the ship was rolling very bad.

That's all?

Did the exec say anything?

Did the Captain say anything?

Did the OOD say anything?

Did the ship just roll in silence for 10 minutes?

Well...

I think the Captain wanted to come north

and the exec wanted to come south.

Or the other way around or something like that.

Why did the Captain want to come south?

I don't know, sir.

Why did the exec want to come north?

Sir, I'm a signalman.

But the Captain did not

act queer or crazy in any way, at any time that morning, correct?

The Captain was the same as always, sir.

Crazy or sane, Urban?

He was sane, sir. As far as I knew.

No further questions.

Urban, were you aboard when the Cainecut its own tow cable

the time it was towing targets outside Pearl Harbor?

Yes, sir. -What were you doing at the time that it happened?

Well, I was...

Well, that is, the Captain was eating...

He was balling me out on the bridge, sir.

What for?

My shirt tails was out.

Was the Captain very strict on the subject of shirt tails?

Oh, he was nut...

I mean, yes, sir. He was very strict on shirt tails, sir.

So, while the Captain was discussing your shirt tails

the ship went around in a circle and steamed over her own towline.

I object to the question.

I object to the question. Counsel has tricked the witness

with leading questions into asserting as fact the Cainecut a towline.

A material point not touched upon in direct examination.

If it please the court, the witness stated

he had never seen the Captain do anything crazy.

I'm attempting to refute this.

Defense counsel have the opportunity to originate evidence later.

Objection sustained.

The cross-examination thus far will be stricken from the record.

Urban, what is a paranoid personality?

Sir?

Could you recognize a psychotic person?

Me?

No further questions.

Urban,

you will not discuss your testimony with anyone outside this courtroom, understood?

No, sir.

Excused.

Thank you, sir.

Call Chief Watertender, Bud.

One moment.

I understand that the judge advocate intends to call

a dozen members of the crew of the Caine.

That's correct.

Is the purpose to confirm Urban's testimony

that the Captain was never seen to do anything crazy?

That's the purpose.

Defense will concede

that the testimony of these witnesses will corroborate Urban's,

if the judge advocate concedes that

these 12 men don't know anymore about a paranoid than Urban.

I'll gladly make that concession, sir, on those terms.

Lieutenant Greenwald, you're making a weighty concession.

By your leave, sir, I make that concession.

Just don't record that.

-Mr. Greenwald? Yes, sir.

The court understands that you were appointed defense counsel by the judge advocate.

Is that right?

-Yes, sir. When were you appointed?

Four days ago, sir.

Do you think you've had time to prepare your case?

May it please the court, Lieutenant Greenwald accepted this assignment

at my earnest request.

I see by your uniform, you're a flying officer.

-Yes, sir. What do you fly?

-F6 -F's, sir.

What're you doing on the beach? Were you grounded?

Hospitalized for third degree burns, sir.

I see. How were you burned?

Crashed a barrier on the USS Wasp,sir.

Did you have a chance to practice much law before the war came along?

A little, sir.

Court will speak to the accused off the record.

Yes, sir.

Come up here, Lieutenant.

Come here.

It seems the court's duty at this point to inquire

whether your counsel's conduct of the defense meets with your approval.

May it please the court, if the accused answers that question now,

he must do so on blind faith.

I beg the court for an opportunity to speak to my client first.

No, we've had too many recesses here.

Not a recess, sir, a brief delay, two minutes.

All right, court will remain in session.

There'll be a two minute pause in the proceedings.

Challee.

Well, do you want to get rid of me?

I don't know.

Everything's all right up till now.

-I'm sunk. -You're not.

Fifteen years -in the brig. -You won't go to the brig.

What's going on here, Jack? Where'd you get this bird?

Sir, Barney Greenwald. We went to Georgetown Law together.

Before the war, he was one of the most successful young lawyers in Washington.

-He was? -Yes, sir.

Well, don't you think he's putting on a damned queer show here?

-Well, yes, sir, I do. -Why didn't you cross-examine Tom Keefer?

-There isn't time to tell. -He knows everything that Captain Queeg did. Everything.

-Sure he does. -And if he wouldn't talk,

it was up to you to drag it out of him, wasn't it?

You don't begin to understand...

I don't understand what you're doing, mister, that's for sure.

I just happen to want to fight this case.

Why? Why? What's it matter to you? You're a total stranger.

I want to win it.

I want to believe you.

It's God's truth.

No, you said you'd rather be prosecuting me than defending me.

Maybe this is your screwy way of prosecuting me.

A Jewish fellow, isn't he?

Yes, sir. Barney's Jewish.

You're telling me he's a hell of a lot sharper than he seems.

Gentlemen.

The court again asks the accused, are you satisfied?

I'm satisfied, sir.

Court will not reopen this question.

I understand that, sir. I'm satisfied with Lieutenant Greenwald.

Continue your case, Commander Challee.

Call Lieutenant Keith.

Lieutenant Keith.

You do solemnly swear the evidence you shall give in this court

shall be the truth, the whole truth and

nothing but the truth, so help you God?

I do.

State your name, rank and present station.

Willis Seward Keith, Lieutenant, Junior Grade, USNR,

Assistant Communications Officer of the USS Caine.

If you recognize the accused, state as so.

Steve Maryk, my executive officer on the Caine.

Mr. Keith, were you officer of the deck of the Caine during the forenoon watch

-on 18th December, 1944? Yes.

Was the Captain relieved of his command during your watch?

-Yes, he was. -Do you know why the executive officer

relieved the Captain?

Yes. Captain Queeg had lost control of himself

and the ship was in grave danger of foundering.

How many years have you served at sea, Lieutenant?

One year and three months.

Do you know how many years Commander Queeg has served at sea?

I guess about 10 years.

Which of you is better qualified to judge

whether a ship is foundering or not?

Myself, sir, if I'm in possession of my faculties and Commander Queeg isn't.

What makes you think he isn't in possession of his faculties?

He wasn't on the morning of December 18.

Have you studied medicine or psychiatry?

No.

Did the Captain rave, or foam, or make insane gestures?

No, but what he did do was just as bad.

Clarify that a bit, if you will.

His orders were vague and sluggish and not appropriate.

He insisted on going south,

when we had a north wind of 90 miles an hour behind us.

With a stern wind that strong, the ship couldn't be controlled.

In your expert opinion, as a ship handler, that is.

Steve Maryk thought so, and he's an expert ship handler.

Mr. Keith, were you wholeheartedly loyal to your captain

or antagonistic to him, prior to 18th December?

I was antagonistic to Captain Queeg at certain isolated times.

At what isolated times were you antagonistic to him?

When Captain Queeg maltreated the men, I opposed him.

When did Captain Queeg ever maltreat the men?

Well, for one thing, he systematically persecuted

Gunner's Mate Second Class Stilwell.

In what way?

First he restricted him to the ship for six months for reading on watch.

He refused to grant him leave in the States when we were back here in December '43.

The man was getting anonymous letters about his wife's infidelity.

Maryk gave Stilwell a 72-hour emergency leave

and he returned a few hours over leave and...

Mr. Keith, you say Maryk gave Stilwell a pass.

Did Maryk know the Captain had denied leave to Stilwell?

Yes, sir.

Did Maryk check with the Captain before issuing the pass?

No, sir.

Mr. Keith, are you testifying that Maryk

deliberately violated his captain's orders?

Well, I mean, it was my fault, actually.

I begged him to. I was morale officer.

-Mr. Keith. Mr. Keith. -And I thought the man's morale...

We now have your testimony that you, Maryk and Stilwell

connived to circumvent an express order of your commanding officer,

a whole year before the typhoon of 18th December.

Please tell the court any other instances of

maltreatment that occur to you.

He cut off the movies for six months

just because he wasn't invited to a showing by mistake.

He cut off the water at the equator

because he said the men were using too much and had to be taught a lesson.

Mr. Keith,

did Captain Queeg ever issue any rules or punishments not permitted by regulations?

He never did anything not allowed by regulations.

You didn't like the Captain, did you, Lieutenant?

I did, at first, very much.

But gradually I realized that he was a petty tyrant and utterly incompetent.

Did you think he was insane, too?

Not until the day of the typhoon.

Very well. Come to the day of the typhoon.

Was your decision to obey Maryk based on your judgment that the Captain had gone mad

or was it based on your hatred of Captain Queeg?

I just don't remember my state of mind that long ago.

No further questions.

Mr. Keith, you stated you disliked Captain Queeg.

I did dislike him.

Did you state under direct examination all your reasons for disliking him?

Not at all.

State the rest of your reasons now, please.

Well, for one thing, he extorted $100 from me.

Objection.

The issue in this case is not whether Captain Queeg was a model officer,

but whether he was insane on 18th December.

Defense counsel hasn't even touched this issue.

Please the court, this will bear directly on

the mental fitness of Captain Queeg to command a naval vessel,

and as evidence, it is nothing but a clarification

of Mr. Keith's dislike for his commanding officer,

a fact established by the judge advocate at great pains in direct examination.

Objection's overruled.

Describe this so-called extortion, Mr. Keith.

Well, this was back last December in San Francisco Bay.

The Captain had this big crate

full of cheap tax-free whiskey from Pearl Harbor

he wanted to sneak into Oakland.

He appointed me boat officer,

and a working party started to load the crate into the gig.

It was terrifically heavy and Captain Queeg got excited

and screeched a whole bunch of contradictory orders.

The sailors got rattled and dropped the crate into the water.

It sank like a stone, and I was out $110.

You mean the Captain was?

No, sir, I was.

The Captain informed me that I was responsible

because I was the boat officer in charge of the loading

and he asked me to think over what I ought to do about it.

Well, I was supposed to go on leave the next day,

my girl had flown in from New York to be with me.

So I went to the Captain and I apologized for my stupidity

and said that I'd like to pay for the lost crate.

He took my money gladly and then he signed my leave papers.

What further reasons did you have for disliking Queeg?

My chief reason for disliking Captain Queeg was his cowardice in battle.

What cowardice?

He repeatedly ran from shore batteries.

Objection!

Counsel's originating evidence beyond the scope of direct examination.

He is leading the witness into irresponsible libels of an officer of the Navy.

Please the court, Mr. Keith's dislike for his commanding officer

is not only within the scope of direct examination, it was the key fact brought out.

Now the witness has confessed an ignorance of psychiatry.

Things Queeg did which caused the witness in his ignorance to dislike him

may in fact have been the helpless acts of a sick man.

I respectfully urge my objection, sir.

Court finds the question within the scope of direct examination.

And the answer is material. Objection overruled. Proceed.

Mr. Keith, where and when did Captain Queeg

run from shore batteries?

Practically every time we heard gunfire from the beach.

I guess the worst time was at Kwajalein.

That's where he got the nickname, Old Yellow Stain.

What did this nickname, Old Yellow Stain, imply?

Well, cowardice, of course.

It referred to a yellow dye marker he dropped over the side.

Describe this Yellow Stain incident.

Well, I wasn't on the bridge, so I only heard about it afterwards.

-Objection. What happened was...

Does defense counsel seriously intend to enter these hearsay libels on the record?

I withdraw the question.

Defense will introduce direct evidence on the Yellow Stain incident.

Strike the question and the answer from the record.

Can you describe any incidents of cowardice

to which you were an eyewitness, Mr. Keith?

Well, in any combat situation,

the Captain was always found on the side of the bridge away from the firing.

I saw that a dozen times when I was OOD.

No further questions.

Mr. Keith,

has Commander Queeg ever been court-martialed by a higher authority

for any of the alleged acts of cowardice you described?

No.

Well, can you cite any official records that might substantiate these

fantastic and libelous stories you've been telling,

under the guidance of defense counsel?

Official records, no.

Can you state as fact, that the crate that was lost at sea

contained smuggled liquor?

It was -common knowledge. Common knowledge?

Did you see any liquor -in the crate? -No.

Can you name one person who will testify that they saw liquor in the crate?

Well, naturally, he was pretty careful about that.

-Not one person. -I just don't know who'd have actually seen it.

Mr. Keith, you've testified that you hate Captain Queeg.

You've reported, as fact, every evil rumor about him

and you've made wild, irresponsible charges under oath.

Isn't that the plain truth of your testimony, Mr. Keith?

I haven't lied once.

Mr. Keith, on the morning the Captain was relieved,

did you really think he had gone crazy?

I said before, I can't say for sure what my state of mind was.

No more questions.

You'll not discuss any details of your testimony

outside this courtroom, Lieutenant.

Aye, aye, sir.

You're excused.

Call Captain Southard.

Captain Southard.

What will they ask Captain Southard?

I don't know. But we'll soon find out.

Come on up here, Captain, we'll swear you in.

Do you solemnly swear the evidence you shall give

in this court shall be the truth, the whole truth

and nothing but the truth, so help you God?

I do.

State your name, rank and present station.

Randolph Patterson Southard,

Captain US Navy, Commander, Destroyer Squadron Eight.

You understand, sir, that you've been called as an expert witness

on destroyer -ship handling? -I do.

State your qualifications.

Some 20 years in destroyers.

Ten years commanding all types,

from the World War One four-piper on up to the newest 2,200 tonner.

Now, sir,

I'm going to describe a hypothetical ship handling problem

for your expert opinion.

Very well.

You're in command of a destroyer in the Philippine Sea.

A typhoon blows up, without warning, traveling west.

The wind keeps increasing, its direction holding steady from the north.

The wind is now force 10 to 12, your seas are mountainous.

Under those circumstances, sir, what would you do?

I believe I'd execute the classic Navy maneuver known as getting the hell out of there.

How would you go about that, Captain?

It's almost a rule of thumb.

You say the wind's from the north at 90 knots,

the center of the typhoon is coming at you from the east.

The best course is south.

How about turning north under those circumstances and heading into the wind?

That would be dubious and dangerous, not to say idiotic.

Why, Captain?

Because you're headed right back into the path of the typhoon.

Unless you're interested in sinking, that's not smart.

That's all, sir.

Captain, have you ever conned a ship through the center of a typhoon?

I have not handled a DMS at the center of a typhoon, no.

But I don't know who the hell has beside the skipper of the Caine.

Will you state, without reservation,

that the rules of destroyer handling

would hold for a DMS in the center of a typhoon?

At the center of a typhoon there are no hard and fast rules.

That's one situation where it's entirely up to the commanding officer.

Too many things can happen too fast.

Captain, you remember the hypothetical question

of the judge advocate about the typhoon?

I do.

Now in that situation, I ask you to assume that

the winds and seas have become worse than any you've experienced.

The ship is wallowing broadside,

you actually believe your ship is foundering,

you're in the last extremity.

Now, do you bring your ship north into the wind,

or do you continue south, stern to wind?

You're getting mighty hypothetical.

Yes, sir. You prefer not to answer that question, Captain?

I'll answer it.

In the last extremity,

I'd come around to the north and head into the wind,

if I could, but only in the last extremity.

No further questions.

In your opinion, Captain,

who is the best judge as to when a ship is in its last extremity?

There's only one judge, the commanding officer.

Why, sir?

Well, the Navy has made him captain

because his knowledge of the sea and of ships

is better than anyone else's on the ship.

Panic is a common hazard at sea.

The highest function of command is to override it,

to listen to nothing but the voice of his own professional judgment.

Thank you, Captain.

You will not discuss your testimony outside the courtroom, Captain.

Understood.

You're excused and thank you.

Call Dr. Forest Lundeen.

Raise your right hand. You do solemnly swear the evidence you shall give in this court

shall be the truth, the whole truth,

and nothing but the truth, so help you God?

I do.

State your name, rank and present station.

Forest Lundeen, MD, Captain US Navy.

Head of psychiatry, US Naval Hospital, San Francisco.

Were you head of the medical board which examined

-Lieutenant Commander Queeg? I was.

How long did the examination last, Doctor?

We had the commander under constant observation and testing for three weeks.

What was the finding of the board?

Commander Queeg was discharged with a clean bill of health.

Doctor, is it possible that two months ago on December 18

he was in such a state of psychotic collapse

that relieving him from a naval command would be justified?

It's utterly impossible.

We're going to place your report in evidence and hear Dr. Bird.

Thank you, Doctor.

Dr. Lundeen, my background is legal, not medical,

so I hope you'll bear with me if I try to clarify technical terms.

Of course, of course.

I'll probably ask some elementary questions.

Perfectly all right.

Now, Doctor, would you say Commander Queeg is absolutely normal?

Well, normality, you know, is a fiction in psychiatry.

No adult's without problems, except a happy imbecile.

Can you describe Commander Queeg's problems, please?

Well, you might say his overall problem is one of inferiority feelings,

generated by an unfavorable childhood

and aggravated by certain adult experiences.

Unfavorable childhood in what way?

Disturbed background, divorced parents, financial trouble, schooling problems.

And the aggravating factors in adult life?

In general, the commander is rather troubled by his short stature,

his low standing in his class and such factors.

The commander is well adjusted to all these things.

Can you describe the nature of this adjustment?

Yes, I can. His identity as a naval officer is the essential balancing factor.

It's the key to his personal security.

Therefore, he has a fixed anxiety about protecting his standing.

That would account for the harshness and ill-temper.

Would he be disinclined to admit to mistakes?

Yes. Of course, there's nothing unbalanced in that.

Oh. Would he be a perfectionist?

Such a personality would be.

Suspicious of subordinates? Inclined to hound them over small details?

Any mistake by a subordinate is intolerable because it might endanger him.

And yet he will not admit mistakes when he makes them himself.

You might say he revises reality in his own mind,

so that he comes out blameless.

Yes, but, Doctor, isn't distorting reality a symptom of mental illness?

Well, it's a question of degree. None of us wholly faces reality.

But doesn't the commander distort reality more than, say, you do?

That's his weakness. Other people have other weaknesses.

It's definitely not disabling.

Would he be inclined to stubbornness?

You'll have a certain rigidity of personality in such an individual.

The inner insecurity checks him

from admitting that those who differ with him may be right.

Doctor, you've testified that the following symptoms

exist in commander Queeg's behavior.

Rigidity of personality, feelings of persecution, unreasonable suspicion,

withdrawal from reality, perfectionist anxiety, an unreal basic premise

and an obsessive sense of self-righteousness.

All mild, sir. All well compensated.

Yes, Doctor.

Now, is there an inclusive psychiatric term,

one label for this syndrome?

Syndrome? Who said anything about a syndrome?

You're misusing the term. There's no syndrome because there's no disease.

Thank you for the correction, Doctor. I'll rephrase it.

Do these symptoms fall into a single pattern of neurotic disturbance?

A common psychiatric class?

I know what you're driving at, of course. It's a paranoid personality.

But that is not a disabling affliction.

What sort of -personality, Doctor? -Paranoid.

-Paranoid, Doctor. -Yes, paranoid.

Thank you, Doctor. No more questions.

You will not discuss your testimony outside this courtroom. You're excused.

Call Dr. Bird.

Dr. Bird.

These things are such a waste of time.

I don't know why a deposition couldn't do the same thing.

Yes, sir.

These doctors. Ought to run every one of them through boot camp.

Get your hands out of your pockets, sailor.

You do solemnly swear the evidence you shall

give in this court shall be the truth, the whole truth,

and nothing but the truth, -so help you God? -I do.

State your name, rank and present station.

Alan Winston Bird, MD, Lieutenant USNR,

on the psychiatric staff of the US Naval Hospital, San Francisco.

Were you a member of the board, headed by Dr. Lundeen,

which recently inquired into the mental health of Lieutenant Commander Queeg?

-Yes, sir. -What was the finding of the board?

We found the commander mentally fit for command now and has never been unfit.

Did you find any indication in Commander Queeg

of what is known as a paranoid personality?

Well, I prefer to call it obsessive personality with paranoid features.

But this did not indicate any mental unfitness however?

Oh, no.

You unanimously agreed then, Doctor, that Commander Queeg

is mentally fit now and must have been mentally fit on December 18

when he was relieved from naval command on the grounds of mental illness?

That was our unanimous conclusion.

Thank you, Doctor. No further questions.

Doctor, you have a special training in Freudian technique?

Yes.

In Freudian analysis, is there such a thing as mental illness?

Well, there are disturbed people and adjusted people.

But disturbed and adjusted correspond roughly, don't they,

to the terms sick and well, as laymen use them?

Very roughly, yes.

Would you say that Commander Queeg suffers from inferiority feelings?

Yes, but they are well compensated.

Is there a difference between compensated and adjusted?

Most definitely.

Can you explain it?

Well, let's say a man has some deep-seated psychological disturbance.

He can compensate by finding outlets for his peculiar drives.

He can never adjust without undergoing psychoanalysis.

Has Commander Queeg ever been psychoanalyzed?

-No. -He is, then, a disturbed person?

Yes, he is. Not disabled, however, by the disturbance.

How has he compensated?

Well, two ways mainly.

The paranoid pattern, which is useless and undesirable,

and his naval career, which is extremely useful and desirable.

You say that his military career is a result of the disturbance?

Most military careers are.

Doctor, did you note any peculiar habit of Commander Queeg?

Something he did with his hands?

You mean the rolling of the steel balls?

Yes. Describe the habit, please.

Well, it's an incessant rolling, or rattling

of two marbles in his hand, either hand.

Why does he do it?

His hands tremble. He does it to conceal the trembling, to still his hands.

It makes him feel more comfortable.

Why do his hands tremble?

The inner tension. It's one of the surface symptoms.

Does this rolling motion have any significance in Freudian analysis?

Well, it's an obvious sexual symbol, of course.

How far is this totally

irrelevant technical discussion going to be pushed?

Are you objecting to the question?

I'm requesting the court set limits to time wasting by the defense.

Request is noted. Proceed with your cross-examination.

Doctor, you've testified that Commander Queeg

is a disturbed, not an adjusted person?

-Yes. -He is, then, in laymen's terms sick?

I remember agreeing to the rough resemblance between the terms disturbed and sick.

But by those terms, an awful lot of people are sick.

Yes, but this trial only has Commander Queeg's sickness at issue.

Now if he's sick, how could your board have given him a clean bill of health?

You're playing on words, I'm afraid. We found no disability.

Doctor, supposing the requirements of command

were many times as severe as you believe them to be,

wouldn't even this mild sickness disable Queeg?

-That's absurdly hypothetic. -Is it?

Have you ever had -sea duty, Doctor? -No.

Have you ever -been to sea? -No.

How long have you been in the Navy?

-Five months. -Have you had any dealings

with ships' captains -before this case? -No.

Upon what do you base your estimate of the stresses of command?

Well, my general knowledge on...

Do you think command requires a highly gifted, exceptional person?

-Well, no. -It doesn't?

Not highly gifted, no. Adequate responses, fairly good intelligence

and sufficient training and experience, but...

Is that enough equipment for, say, a highly gifted, highly skilled psychiatrist?

Well, not exactly.

In other words, it takes more ability to be a psychiatrist

than the Captain of a naval vessel?

It takes...

That is, different abilities are required.

You're making the invidious comparison, not I.

Doctor, you've admitted Commander Queeg is sick.

The only remaining question is, how sick?

You don't think he's sick enough to be disabled from command.

I suggest that, since you evidently don't know very much

about the requirements of command,

you may be wrong in your conclusion.

I repudiate your suggestion.

You deliberatelysubstituted the word "sick."

Which is a loose... A polarized word...

I'm sorry, what kind of word?

Polarized.

-Polarized? -Invidious.

I never said "sick."

Now, my grasp of the requirements of command is adequate,

or I would have disqualified myself from serving on the board.

Maybe you should have.

The witness is being badgered.

I withdraw my last statement. No further questions.

Dr. Bird, the defense counsel has managed to put words in your mouth

that I'm certain you don't mean.

I am not aware he succeeded in putting any words into my mouth.

Doctor, he drew from you the implication that Captain Queeg...

Sir, I am careful in my use of terminology.

I did not introduce the term "sick."

I do not regard it as a precise term.

Nevertheless, if you're going to use such a loose term, then Captain Queeg,

like a vast number of seemingly healthy people, is sick.

However, he is definitely not disabled for command,

which is the only issue here.

Sir, that sounds like a contradiction, which I'm...

We live in a sick civilization.

The well people are exceptional.

And Captain Queeg certainly isn't exceptional in that regard.

And furthermore, I'd like ...ank you.

Thank you, Doctor. Certainly clarifies the matter.

No more questions.

Doctor, Doctor, you'll not discuss your testimony outside this courtroom.

Yes, sir. -You're excused.

Prosecution rests.

Is defense ready to present its case?

Yes, sir.

How many witnesses are you calling?

Only two, sir. The first is the accused.

We can button this all up tomorrow morning?

I believe so, sir.

Recess until 0900.

That was marvelous, cutting up that doctor like that.

Wise little bastard.

-Did you ever read it? -What?

Your friend -Tom Keefer's novel? -Huh?

Multitudes, Multitudes. You ever read it?

Tom's novel? No. He's always -kept it in a black satchel. -I'd like to read it.

Quite a job you did on Bird, Barney.

Thanks, Jack.

-It won't cut any ice. -No?

No, Blakely's headed up a lot of these courts.

He doesn't go for vaudeville.

-See you tomorrow, Jack. -See you tomorrow.

I'm sure it exposes this -war for all its grim futility. -What does?

The book.

I'm sure it shows up all the regular Army and Navy officers,

bunch of stupid sadists, bitching up the campaigns,

throwing away the lives of fatalistic, humorous, lovable citizen soldiers,

lots of sexy scenes where the prose becomes rhythmic and beautiful

while the girl gets -her pants pulled down. -What's eating you?

I hate this case, you know.

More so because I want to win it so bad.

Because of what I have to do to win it.

I'm beginning to think you...

I've got a pretty good chance here.

You're pretty keen, all right.

Almost as keen as Tom Keefer?

Oh, boy, you were... You sure were right about him.

Why did he do it, anyway? I mean, he didn't have to implicate himself.

He could have said what he really thought about Queeg.

What, to Blakely? Blakely's sniffing around the edges of Keefer as it is.

No, sir. Your friend's one course was to clam up. He's smart.

It's all right. You don't like Tom much.

When I look at Tom Keefer, I see myself a couple of years ago.

Only like in a crazy mirror, all distorted and upside down.

I'm not amused.

Maybe Tom Keefer didn't enjoy sailing under Queeg for half a year.

Maybe he'd enjoy it less if the Nazis and the Japs

were shaking hands right now at the Mississippi River.

I guess one thing I found out, Maryk,

is there's a time for everything, including rebellious youth.

Possibly you and Mr. Keefer were dead wrong in your timing.

If that's the case, well, the next question is,

who's the real victim in this courtroom? You or Captain Queeg?

Captain Queeg was nuts.

You heard Dr. Lundeen. It's a question of degree.

If you're at war and your command personnel is stretched thin,

maybe you use him because he's got the training.

I think Captain Queeg is a mean, stupid son of a bitch.

Okay!

If that was grounds for deposing your superior officer,

we wouldn't have an Army or a Navy.

That's a wide-spread opinion of superior officers.

Well, they're not all Queegs.

Superiors all tend to look like Queeg from underneath.

It's an unflattering angle.

What do you do when you really get a Queeg?

You fight the war. Where can we get drunk? I mean drunk.

Attention!

Court is in session.

Defense, present your case.

I call the accused.

Do you solemnly swear the evidence you shall give in this court

shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?

I do.

State your name, rank and present station.

Stephen Maryk, Lieutenant, USNR, executive officer of the USS Caine.

Are you the accused in this court-martial?

I am.

What was your occupation in civilian life?

Helping in my father's fishing business.

We own a couple of boats.

Where? -In San Francisco.

Then you were familiar with the problems of ocean going

ship handling before entering the Navy?

Well, I've been on boats since I was 14.

Did you relieve the commanding officer of the Caine

of his command on December 18, 1944?

-I did. -Was the Cainein the last extremity

when you relieved the Captain?

-It was. -On what fact do you base this judgment?

Well, on several... Well, we were unable to hold course.

We broached to three times in an hour.

Broached to?

Yes. Wind and sea took charge, tossed us sideways for 10 minutes at a time.

We were rolling too steeply for the inclinometer to record.

We were shipping solid green water in the wheelhouse. Generators were cutting out.

The ship wasn't answering to emergency rudder and engine settings.

We were lost and out of control.

Did you point these things out to the Captain?

Repeatedly, for over an hour. I begged him to come north, head into the wind.

What was his response?

Mostly a glazed look and no answer,

or a repetition of his own desires.

Which were what?

Well, I guess to hold fleet course until we went down.

Mr. Maryk, when did you start keeping your medical log on Captain Queeg?

Shortly after the Kwajalein invasion.

Why did you start it?

I began to think the Captain might be mentally ill.

Why?

That yellow dye marker business.

Was that the incident in which Captain Queeg

acquired the nickname Old Yellow Stain?

Yes, it was.

You witnessed the occurrence yourself?

I was navigator. I was right there on the bridge.

Describe the Yellow Stain incident, please.

Well, it was the first morning of the invasion.

We were ordered to lead a group of attack boats into the beach.

Uh, that is, we had to take them to their line of departure,

1,000 yards from the beach.

These little boats, they lay so low in the water

that they couldn't see to navigate for themselves.

They needed a guide to make sure that they hit the right island.

The right beach.

Captain Queeg rang up 10 knots and we started to head in towards this island.

Uh...

Yeah, it had some funny Jap name. Our code name for it was Jacob Island.

It was a choppy sea. And the assault boats could only make five or six knots.

And at that they were shipping solid water,

and the marines were getting just about drowned in spray.

And they began to fall way behind.

And naturally, they signaled for us to slow down.

But the Captain just ignored them.

We pulled further and further ahead until we could hardly see them.

Then, when we were about 2,500 yards from the beach, we heard some gunfire.

And the Captain suddenly yelled, "We're running up on the beach!

"Reverse course! Make 30 knots!"

And while we were turning, he...

He threw over one of these yellow dye markers he used

to mark water when there's a floating mine or something.

So we went barreling out of there.

The attack boats were just a lot of specks way off in the distance,

and all you could see behind us was this big spread of yellow,

all over the water.

Now, Mr. Maryk, why didn't...

Court wants to question the witness.

Lieutenant, how do you know you were 2,500 yards from the beach when you turned?

Sir, I was navigating. There wasn't a doubt in the world

where we were by visual plot

and our radar range to the beach was also 2,500 when we turned.

Now, Mr. Maryk, why didn't you go to higher authority at once

with your doubts about the Captain's mental health?

Uh, well, I figured if only I had a record I'd be on stronger ground.

So I decided to start the log.

I figured if ever I was all wrong, I'd just burn it.

I kept it under lock and key.

What made an incident worthy of record in your medical log?

Well, just any act that seemed strange or abnormal.

Like the Silex business.

Describe the Silex business.

A mess boy slopped coffee on a Silex. Burned it out.

Now, none of the mess boys would admit which one did it.

So, the Captain, he ordered all of the officers of the ship

to sit as a court of inquiry until we found out who burned out the Silex.

I mean, in itself it's a silly little thing,

but it went on and on for 36 hours.

All ship's work stopped. And there we all were, sitting in a wardroom,

dying for sleep, needing shaves

and still trying to find out which of those poor colored boys burned out the Silex.

And by then those kids thought whoever did it was gonna get hung.

They'd have died before telling us.

So finally, I had to go to the Captain and tell him

that all of the officers admitted to being incompetent investigators,

they'd take cuts in their fitness reports,

but that they couldn't find out who slopped coffee on the Silex.

So he made a note in his black book and called off the inquiry.

Things like that, or like the water business.

Describe the water business.

Well, it's all in the log, how he cut off the water at the equator

for two days for the whole ship just because he caught one simple deckhand

stealing a drink during water conservation hours.

Or plain crazy things, like the strawberry business.

Describe the -strawberry business. -Well, there...

Objection. The so-called medical log was introduced as evidence

at the start of these proceedings.

All this is just repeating a lot of trivial disloyal gripes.

If the court concurs, I'll pass over the medical log.

Well, let's not take up time here.

Aye, aye, sir.

Only there seems to be some confusion

about this so-called strawberry business.

Now it started out as a search for a quart of strawberries, is that right?

-Yes, sir. And it somehow turned

into a search for a key?

-That's right. -How was that?

That's on account of the cheese business.

The cheese business? I don't recall any cheese business.

Well, that was on the first ship Captain Queeg served on, sir,

when he was an ensign.

Cheese had been disappearing from ship's store.

He investigated and he caught a sailor

who had made himself a duplicate key to the padlock on the refrigerator.

Now from catching this cheese thief,

the Captain had gotten a letter of commendation.

This was peace time. Naturally, he was real proud of it.

When the strawberry thing came up, he insisted it was the same thing.

All we had to do was find out

who'd made a duplicate key to the wardroom icebox.

But, of course, it was ridiculous. It was the mess boys again.

We all knew they'd eaten up this quart of strawberries.

It was just... It was leavings from the wardroom mess

and they were entitled to eat it. That was the custom.

But naturally, when the Captain started

to roar around about those strawberries, why,

the boys, they froze up and swore they hadn't eaten 'em.

And the Captain, he was so steamed up on this key theory he believed.

So he ordered the search for the key?

Yes, sir. We ain't never saw Captain Queeg so happy before or since.

He was living the cheese business all over again.

Organized the search himself. All ship's work was suspended.

And we collected every single key on the ship.

We had boxes of keys. We had barrels of keys.

About 2,800 of 'em. All tagged with the owner's name.

Then to make sure we had them all, we searched the ship.

From stem to stern. From the crow's nest to the build.

We stripped the crew stark naked.

Every one of them shook out their clothes, we searched their lockers,

we crawled in to every hole and every space in the ship.

This went on for three days.

All of it over a key which never existed.

When I saw Captain Queeg sitting by the icebox

taking those keys one by one out of the barrels,

trying them on the padlock, hours on end, with a gleam in his eye,

I just gave up.

Continue your examination.

Mr. Maryk, when the typhoon was over,

did Captain Queeg make any effort to regain command?

Yes, on the morning of the 19th.

The storm had blown out, we'd just sighted the fleet.

Describe what happened.

Well, I was in the charthouse, writing up a dispatch

to report the relief to Admiral Halsey.

The Captain came in and he said, "Do you mind coming to my cabin

"and having a talk before you send that?"

So I went below and we talked.

It was the same thing.

First about how I'd be court-martialed for mutiny, and then...

Then he said, "You've applied for transfer to the regular Navy.

"You know this means an end to all that."

And then he went into this long thing about how he loved the Navy,

he had no other interest in life and even if he was cleared,

this would ruin his record.

And I said I felt sorry for him, and I really did.

Finally, he came out with his proposal.

He said he would forget the whole thing and never report me.

He would resume command,

and the whole matter would be forgotten and written off...

What did you say to this proposal?

Well, I was amazed. I said,

"Captain, the whole ship knows about it.

"It's written up in the quartermaster's log and the OOD's log."

And, well, he just... He hemmed and hawed,

and finally he said,

"Well, it wouldn't be the first time that a penciled rough log

"had been fixed up and corrected after the fact."

Did you remind him about the rule against erasure?

Yes, he kind of laughed and he said,

"It's either that or court-martial for mutiny for me."

And a black mark on his record which he didn't deserve.

He didn't see that a few penciled rough lines were worth all that.

What followed?

Well, he began to plead and beg.

Uh, he cried at one point.

And in the end, he became terrifically angry and ordered me out of his cabin.

So I sent the dispatch.

Then you had the chance, 24 hours later,

of expunging the whole event from the official record

with the Captain's knowledge and approval?

Yes.

Mr. Maryk, were you panicky at all during the typhoon?

I was not.

Now, Lieutenant, you are charged

with relieving your captain willfully,

without authority and without justifiable cause.

Did you relieve Captain Queeg willfully?

Yes. I knew what I was doing.

Did you relieve without authority?

No. My authority was Articles 184, 185, 186.

Did you relieve without justifiable cause?

No. My justifiable cause was the Captain's mental breakdown

at a time when the ship was in danger.

No further questions.

Mr. Maryk,

this amazing interview, in which the Captain offered to falsify official records,

were there any witnesses to it?

We were alone in the Captain's cabin. No.

This incident at Kwajalein, did anyone else see this chart which, according to you,

indicated your ship turned away from the beach too soon?

About an hour after it happened, the Captain asked to see the chart.

He took it to his cabin.

When I got it back, all my bearings and course lines had been erased.

Then you have no documentary corroboration of this story.

No.

How about the radar men who called off the ranges?

Won't they confirm this story?

Sir, you can't expect them to remember one single radar range

when they call them by the thousands in every invasion.

These poor abandoned Marines in the assault boats

never complained to higher authority of the dastardly conduct of the Caine.

-No. -Strange.

Sir, they landed against machine gunfire.

The ones that survived, I don't think they remember

much else besides that landing.

Mr. Maryk, who coined this scurrilous nickname, Old Yellow Stain?

Uh...

It just sprang into existence.

Throughout the ship? Or just among the officers?

Among the officers.

Are you sure you didn't coin it yourself?

I didn't.

Mr. Maryk, what kind of rating would you give yourself for loyalty to your captain?

I think I was a loyal officer.

Did you issue a 72-hour pass to Stilwell in December '43,

against your captain's express instructions?

I did.

You admit to a disloyal act in your first days as executive officer?

Yes.

Mr. Maryk, where did you get your schooling?

Um, in public schools in San Francisco, and San Francisco University.

How were your grades in elementary school?

Okay.

Average, above average, -below average? -Average.

How were your grades in high school?

Oh, well, I didn't do so good there. Below average.

What kind of course did you take at college?

-Business course. -Any pre-medical courses?

-No. -Any psychology or psychiatry?

-No. -Uh...

How were your grades at college?

-I scraped by. -Below average?

Yes.

Where did you get these highfalutin ideas about paranoia?

Uh, out of books.

What books? Name the titles.

Medical type books about mental illness.

Is this your intellectual hobby, reading about psychiatry?

No.

Where did you get these books?

I borrowed them off ships' doctors here and there.

And with your background, your scholastic record, did you imagine that

you understood these highly technical, scientific works?

Well, I got something out of them.

What's a conditioned reflex?

-I don't know. -What's schizophrenia?

I think that's a mental illness.

You think so. What are its symptoms?

I don't know.

In fact, you don't know what you're talking about

when you discuss mental illness, is that right?

Well, I didn't say I knew much about it.

Have you ever heard the expression, a little learning is a dangerous thing?

Yes.

You got a head full of terms you didn't understand

and on that basis you had the temerity to depose

a commanding officer on the grounds of mental illness. Is that right?

Well, I didn't relieve him because of what the book said.

The ship was in danger ...ver mind the ship.

We're discussing your grasp of psychiatry.

Have you heard the diagnosis of the qualified psychiatrist who examined your captain?

-Yes. -And what was their diagnosis?

Was he crazy or wasn't he on 18 December?

They say he wasn't.

But you, with your whining gripes about strawberries and Silexes, know better.

Mr. Maryk, who was the third ranking officer on your ship?

-Uh, Lieutenant Keefer. Was he a good officer?

-Yes. -Did you consider his mind

to be as good as yours, or, perhaps even better?

Better.

You showed this medical -log of yours to him? -Yes.

He wasn't convinced by it that the Captain was mentally ill.

-No. -He talked you out of

trying to have the Captain relieved.

Yes.

And two weeks later, despite the whole weight of naval discipline,

despite the arguments of the next officer in rank to you,

a superior intellect,

despite all this, you still went ahead and seized command of your ship?

I relieved him because he definitely seemed sick during the typhoon.

You still imagine that your diagnosis of Captain Queeg

is superior to the doctor's?

Only about Queeg on the morning of the typhoon.

No more questions.

No re-examination.

Please step down.

Call Lieutenant Commander Queeg.

Lieutenant Commander...

Commander, the oath...

The oath previously taken by you is still binding.

Oh, yes, sir.

Commander, on the morning of the 19 December,

did you have an interview in your room with Lieutenant Maryk?

Let's see. That's the day after the typhoon. Yes, I did.

-Was it at your request? -Yes.

What was the substance of that interview?

Well, as I say, I felt sorry for him.

I hated to see him ruining his life with one panicky mistake.

Particularly, as I knew it was his ambition to make the Navy his career.

I tried as hard as I could to show him what a mistake he'd made.

I recommended he relinquish command to me,

and I offered to be as lenient as I could

in reporting what had happened.

You never offered not to report the incident?

Oh, how could I? It was already recorded in the logs.

Were the logs in pencil, or typed, or what?

That would make no difference.

Were they in pencil, Commander?

Well, let's see. Probably they were.

Quartermaster log and OOD rough log always are.

I doubt the yeoman would have gotten around to typing

smooth logs in all the excitement!

Did you offer to erase the incident from the penciled logs

and make no report at all?

Oh, I did not. Erasures aren't permitted in penciled logs.

Lieutenant Maryk has testified under oath, Commander,

that you made such an offer.

Not only that, but that you begged and pleaded and even wept to get him to agree

to erase those few pencil lines,

in return for which

you promised to hush up the incident completely and make no report.

-That isn't true. There isn't any truth in it at all?

Well, it's a distortion of what I told you.

My version is the exact truth.

You deny the proposal to erase the logs and hush up the story?

I deny it completely. That's the part he made up.

The weeping and the pleading.

That's fantastic!

You're accusing Lieutenant Maryk of perjury?

I'm not accusing him.

He's accused of enough as it stands.

You're likely to hear a lot of strange things

about me from Mr. Maryk, that's all.

Isn't one of you obviously not telling the truth about that interview?

It appears so.

Can you prove it isn't you?

Only by citing a clean record of over 14 years

as a Navy officer against the word of a man on trial for a mutinous act.

Commander,

did you ever receive $110 from Lieutenant Junior Grade Keith?

I don't recall offhand that I did.

-He testified that you did. -I did?

I did? On what occasion?

On the occasion of a loss of a crate of yours in San Francisco Bay.

Yes, I remember. Uh...

It was over a year ago. December or thereabouts.

He was responsible for the loss and insisted on paying, and so he did.

What was in the crate that cost $110, Commander?

Uh, uniforms, books, navigating instruments. The usual.

How was Keith responsible for the loss?

Well, he was boat officer and in charge of the loading.

He issued foolish and contradictory orders.

The men got rattled and the crate fell into the water and sank.

A wooden crate full of clothing sank?

Well, there were other things in it, I guess.

I had some souvenir coral rocks.

Commander, wasn't the crate entirely full of bottles of intoxicating liquor?

Certainly not!

Keith has testified that you charged him for a crate full of liquor.

You'll hear plenty of strange distortions about me from Keith and Maryk.

They are the two culprits here and they're apt to make

all kinds of strange statements!

Did you make this crate yourself?

No. My carpenter's mate did.

What's his name?

I don't recall. It'll be on the personnel records.

He's been gone from the ship a long time.

Was your carpenter's mate Second Class Otis F. Langhorne?

Lang, Langhorne. Sounds right.

There's a carpenter's mate, First Class Otis F. Langhorne,

at present in damage control school at Treasure Island right here in the bay.

Defense has arranged to subpoena him, if necessary.

You're sure it's the same one?

His service record shows 21 months aboard the Caine.

Your signature is in it. Would it be useful to have him subpoenaed, sir?

Objection to this entire irrelevancy about the crate.

And request it be stricken from the record, sir.

The credibility of the witness is being established.

I submit to the court that nothing could be more relevant to this trial.

Overruled.

"Would it be useful to have him subpoenaed, sir?"

Well, it's a question of which crate Langhorne nailed up.

I had two crates, as I recall now.

Well, this is a new angle, not mentioned by Keith. Uh...

Did Langhorne make both crates, sir?

I don't recall whether I had both crates on that occasion

or two crates on two different occasions.

It's all very trivial and happened a long time ago

and I've had a year of combat steaming in between

and that typhoon and all this hospital business, I'm not too clear.

Commander, there are many points in this trial

that turn on the issue of credibility between yourself and other officers.

Now if you wish, I will request a five minute recess

while you clear your mind, as best you can on the issue of these crates.

That won't be necessary. Just let me think for a moment, please.

Okay. I have it straight now.

I made a misstatement.

I lost a crate in San Diego Harbor back in '38 or '39,

I think it was, under similar circumstances.

That was the one containing clothes.

The crate Keith lost did contain liquor.

How did you obtain a crate full of whiskey during wartime, Commander?

Bought up the rations of my officers at the wine mess in Pearl.

You transported this liquor from Pearl to the States in your ship?

Do you know the regulations regarding the transporting...

I'm aware of regulations! The crate was sealed prior to getting under way.

I gave it the same locked stowage I gave the medicinal brandy.

Liquor was damned scarce and expensive in the States.

I'd had three years of steady combat duty and I gave myself this leeway,

as captain of the Caine.

And it's a common practice and I believe rank has its privileges, as they say.

I had no intention of concealing it from the court.

And I'm not ashamed of it. I simply mixed up the two crates in my mind.

Keith testified that you

gave all the orders to the boat crew which caused the loss of the crate.

That's a lie.

And that you refused to sign his leave papers

until he paid for the loss.

That's another lie.

Seems to be the issue of credibility again, sir,

this time your word against Keith's. Correct?

You'll hear nothing but lies about me from Keith.

He has an insane hatred of me.

Do you -know why, sir? -I can't say.

Unless it's his resentment against fancied injuries

to his crony, the sailor, Stilwell.

Those two were mighty affectionate.

Affectionate, sir?

Well, it just seemed to me that

every time Keith thought I looked cross-eyed at Stilwell,

there was all kinds of screeching and hollering from Keith,

as though I were picking on his wife or something.

Well, those two sure ganged up mighty fast to back Maryk when he relieved me.

Are you suggesting there were abnormal relations between

Lieutenant Keith and the sailor, Stilwell?

I'm not suggesting a thing.

I'm stating plain facts that everybody knew who had eyes to see.

Does the court desire to caution the witness

on the gravity of the insinuated charge?

I'm not insinuating a thing, sir!

I don't know of anything improper between those two men

and I deny insinuating anything.

All I said was Keith was always taking Stilwell's part

and it's the easiest thing in the world to prove

and that's all I said or meant.

Are you gonna pursue this topic?

-No, sir. -Very well. Go ahead.

Commander, during the period when the Cainewas towing targets at Pearl Harbor,

did you ever steam over your own tow line?

Objection! This tow line business is the last straw.

The tactics of the defense are an outrage on the dignity of these proceedings.

He's systematically turning this trial into a court-martial

of Commander Queeg.

Sir, the judge advocate has made it perfectly clear

that he thinks that he has a prima facie case

on the report of the two psychiatrists.

But I say that it is still up to the court

not to shore-bound doctors, however brilliant,

to decide whether the Captain of the Caine was mentally well enough

to retain his self-control

and his post during a typhoon.

Objection is overruled. Witness will answer the question.

"Commander, during the period when the Cainewas towing targets at Pearl Harbor,

"did you ever steam over your own tow line and cut it?"

Okay. Now, here's the story on that particular slander.

I started to make a turn when I noticed some anti-aircraft bursts

close aboard to starboard.

I was gravely concerned that my ship was in...

Was within range of somebody's firing.

We were in a gunnery area.

I was watching the bursts.

The same sailor, Stilwell, a very dreamy and unreliable man, was at the helm.

He failed to warn me that we were coming around

the full 360 degrees.

I saw what was happening, finally, and instantly reversed course.

And I avoided passing over the tow line to my best knowledge.

However, the line parted during the turn.

You say you were distracted by AA bursts? Did anything else distract you?

Not that I recall.

Were you engaged in reprimanding a signalman named

Urban, at length, for having a shirt tail out

while the ship was turning 360 degrees?

Who said that? Keith again?

Will you answer the question, Commander?

It's a malicious lie, of course.

Was Urban on the bridge at that time?

-Yes. -Was his shirt tail out?

Yes. And I reprimanded him. That took me about two seconds.

I'm not in the habit on dwelling on those things.

And then there were those AA bursts and that was what distracted me.

Did you point out these AA bursts to the officer of the deck or the exec?

I may have. I don't recall.

I didn't run weeping to my OOD on every occasion.

I may very well have kept my own council.

And since this shirt tail thing has been brought up,

I would just like to say

that Ensign Keith as morale officer was in charge of enforcing uniform regulations

and completely soldiered on the job.

When I took over that ship, it was like the Chinese Navy

and I bore down on Keith to watch those shirt tails.

As far as I know, that's another reason he hated me

and circulated all this about my cutting the tow line.

Did you drop a yellow dye marker off Jacob Island

on the first morning of the invasion of Kwajalein?

I may have. I don't recall.

Do you recall what your first mission was during the invasion?

To lead the group of attack boats to the line of departure for Jacob Island.

Did you fulfill your mission?

Yes. Why did you drop a dye marker?

I don't know for sure that I did drop one.

Maybe I dropped one to mark the line of departure plainly.

How far was the line of departure from the beach?

As I recall, 1,000 yards.

Commander, didn't you run a mile ahead of the attack boats,

drop your dye marker more than a half a mile short,

then retire at high speed leaving the boats to grope their way

to the line of departure as best they could?

The question is abusive and flagrantly leading.

I'm willing to withdraw my question,

in view of the Captain's dim memory and proceed to more recent events.

Court desires to question the witness.

Commander Queeg, in view of the implications involved in this line of testimony,

I urge you to search your memory for correct answers.

I'm certainly trying to do that, sir,

but these are very small points.

I've been through several campaigns since Kwajalein

and the typhoon and now all this business.

I appreciate that. It will facilitate justice

if you can remember enough to give a few answers on points of fact.

First of all,

were those boats on the line of departure when you turned away from the beach?

As near as I could calculate, yes.

If that's the case, Commander, and they were all on the line,

what purpose did the dye marker serve?

Well, you might say a safety factor.

Just another added mark.

Now maybe I erred in being overcautious

and making sure they knew where they were.

But then again, sir, I've always believed

you can't err on the side of safety.

Did you have the con?

As I recall now, Lieutenant Maryk had the con.

And I now recall I had to caution him for opening the gap too wide,

between us -and the boats. How wide?

I can't say, but at one point there was definitely

too much open water. And I called him aside and I admonished him,

not to run away from the boats.

Did you direct him to slow down when you saw the gap widening?

Well, but it was all happening very fast, sir.

I may have been watching the beach for a few seconds,

and then I saw we were running away.

And so, that's why I dropped the marker,

to compensate for Maryk's running away from the boats.

These are your factual recollections, Commander?

Those are the facts, sir.

Resume your examination.

Commander Queeg, did you make it a practice during invasions

to station yourself on the side of the bridge

that was sheltered from the beach?

That's an insulting question,

and the answer is no.

I had to be on all sides of the bridge at once,

constantly moving from one side to the other because Maryk was navigator

and Keith was my OOD at general quarters...

And both of them were invariably scurrying to the safe side of the bridge,

so I was captain and navigator and OOD all rolled into one and that's the truth!

That's why I had to move constantly from one side of the bridge to the other,

and that's the truth, whatever lies may have been said about me in this court!

Court will question the witness.

Sir, the witness is obviously and understandably agitated by this ordeal,

and I request a recess to give him a breathing space.

I'm not in the least agitated

and I'm glad to answer any and all questions here.

In fact, I demand a chance to set the record straight on

anything derogatory to me in the testimony that's gone before.

I didn't make a single mistake in 15 months aboard the Caine and I can prove it.

My record has been spotless until now

and I don't want it smirched by a whole lot of lies and distortions

by disloyal officers.

Would you like a recess, Commander?

Definitely not, sir. I request there be no recess, if it's up to me.

Very well. I simply want to ask,

if the performance of these two officers was so unspeakably bad,

why did you tolerate it?

Why didn't you beach them?

Or at least rotate them to less responsible battle stations?

Well, strange as it may seem,

the fact is I'm a very soft-hearted guy. Not many people know that.

I never despaired of training those two men up

and making Navy officers of them.

I kept them under my eye just because I wanted to train them up.

The last thing I wanted to do was wreck their careers,

not that they had any similar concern for me, either of them.

Resume your examination.

Commander, on the morning of 18 December when you were relieved,

was the Cainein the last extremity?

It certainly was not!

Was it in grave danger at that moment?

Absolutely not! I had that ship under complete control.

Did you ever indicate to your other officers

that it had been your intention to change course

and come north at 10 o'clock

or 15 minutes after Maryk did?

Yes, I did make that statement, and such had been my intention.

Why did you intend to abandon fleet course, Commander,

if the ship wasn't in danger?

I don't see any inconsistency there.

I've repeatedly stated in my testimony that my rule is safety first.

As I say, the ship wasn't in danger,

but a typhoon is still a typhoon

and I'd just about decided that we'd do as well coming around to north.

I might have executed my intention at 10 o'clock,

and then again I might not have.

Then Maryk's decision to come north was not a panicky irrational blunder.

His panicky blunder was relieving me.

I kept him from making any disastrous mistakes thereafter.

I didn't intend to vindicate myself at the cost of all the lives on the Caine!

Commander Queeg, have you read Lieutenant Maryk's medical log?

Oh, yes, I have read that interesting document, yes, sir, I have.

It is the biggest conglomeration of lies and distortions

and half-truths I've ever seen,

and I'm extremely glad you asked me

because I want to get my side of it all on the record.

Please state your version, or any factual comments on the episodes in the log, sir.

Okay.

Now...

Well, starting right with that strawberry business.

The real truth is that I was betrayed and thrown and double-crossed

by my executive officer and this precious gentleman, Mr. Keith,

who between them corrupted my wardrooms

so that I was one man against a whole ship without any support from my officers.

Okay. Now you take that strawberry business.

Why, if that wasn't a case of outright conspiracy to protect a malefactor from justice.

Maryk carefully leaves out the little fact

that I had conclusively proved, by a process of elimination,

that somebody had a key to the icebox.

He says it was the steward's mates who ate the strawberries.

But if I wanted to take the trouble,

I could prove to this court, geometrically, that they couldn't have.

No, it was the water business all over again,

like when the crew was taking baths seven times a day

and our evaps were definitely on the fritz half the time,

and I was trying to inculcate the simplest principles of water conservation.

But, no. Mr. Maryk, the hero of the crew,

wanted to go right on molly-coddling them

and, well, you take that coffee business.

No! The strawberry thing first.

It all hinged on a thorough search for the key

and that was where Mr. Maryk, as usual,

with the help of Mr. Keith, fudged it!

Just went through a lot of phony motions that proved nothing.

And like thinking the incessant burning out of Silexes

which were government property was a joke.

No sense of responsibility.

Which was the attitude of everybody from Maryk down.

No sense of responsibility, though I emphasized over and over

that the war wouldn't last forever,

that all these things would have to be accounted for.

Oh, it was a constant battle. Always the same thing.

Maryk and Keith undermining my authority.

Always arguments.

Though I personally liked Keith and kept trying to train him up,

only to get stabbed in the back when...

Okay. I think I've covered the strawberry business.

And, oh, yes, this mess account business.

I had to watch them like a hawk.

And believe me, I did.

They didn't sneak any fast one by, but it wasn't for not trying.

Instead of paying some attention to their accounts

and their inventories, which I had to check, over and over.

Always a few pennies short or a few dollars over.

What did it matter to them, keeping accurate records?

Let the Captain worry about it.

And I did, by God!

I defy anyone to look over a single wardroom mess statement

or ship service inventory filed aboard the USS Caine while I was captain

and find a mistake of one single solitary cent.

I defy a certified public accountant to do it.

Okay, what else?

There's so much tripe in that precious log of Mr. Maryk's.

Oh, yes, the movie business.

Okay.

No respect for command

was the whole trouble with that ship.

The movie operator, who had a disrespect, surly manner, anyway,

blithely started the movie without waiting for

the arrival of the commanding officer.

And out of that whole ship's crew, officers and men,

did one person call a halt or even notice that the Captain wasn't present?

I missed those movies more than they did, but I banned them,

and by God I'd do it again.

What was I supposed to do, issue letters of commendation to all of them

for this gratuitous insult to the commanding officer?

Not that I took it personally. It was the principle.

The principle of respect for command.

That principle was dead when I came aboard that ship,

but I brought it to life

and I nagged and I crabbed and I bitched and I hollered,

but by God, I made it stick while I was the Captain!

And so I say, like the Silexes.

It wasn't only the Silexes, it was a matter of respect.

When I ask a sailor a question, I want a straight answer!

And nobody's gonna get away with shifty evasions,

if I have to hold a court of inquiry for a week!

What do I care for strawberries?

It was a question of principle.

Pilfering is pilfering, and on my ship...

Oh, not that we had so many treats, either.

With those slow-motion mess treasurers of ours.

Not like when I was an ensign. Believe me, they made me jump sure enough.

When did we get something pleasant like strawberries?

Once in a blue moon, why,

it was an outrage not to have another helping if I felt like it.

And I wasn't gonna let them get away with that, and I didn't, by God,

there was no more of that again on that ship.

And as I say...

Okay. How many of these things have I covered?

I can only do this roughly from memory,

but you ask me specific questions and I'll tackle 'em one by one.

It was a very thorough and complete answer, Commander, thank you.

May I have Exhibit 12?

Commander, I show you an authenticated copy of a fitness report

you wrote on Lieutenant Maryk, dated 1 July, 1944.

Do you recognize it as such?

Yes.

By that date, had the following incidents already occurred?

The water shortage, the Silex investigation,

the suspension of movies, among others?

Well, by then, yes, I think.

Please read to the court your comment of 1 July, on Lieutenant Maryk.

Naturally, not being vindictive, I...

I didn't write every single thing down.

A service report goes into a man's record.

I tried... I tried to go easy. I always have.

I always will.

I appreciate that, sir. Please read your comment.

"This officer has...

"This officer has, if anything,

"improved in his performance of duty since his last fitness report.

"He is consistently loyal, unflagging, thorough,

"courageous and efficient.

"He is considered at present fully qualified for command of a 1,200-ton DMS.

"His professional zeal and integrity set him apart

"as an outstanding example for other officers,

"reserve and regular alike.

"He cannot be too highly recommended.

"He is recommended for transfer to the regular Navy."

Thank you, Commander. No further questions.

No cross-examination.

You are excused, Commander.

Defense rests.

Is the judge advocate ready?

Commander?

You're excused.

Is the judge advocate ready to present his closing argument?

If it please the court...

I'm...

I'm at a loss to discuss the case the defense has presented.

I have nothing to refute. It's no case at all.

It has nothing to do with the charge or specification.

The defense counsel's very first question in this trial was,

"Commander, have you ever heard the expression Old Yellow Stain?"

That was the key to his entire strategy,

which was simply to twist the proceedings around

so the accused would become not Maryk but Commander Queeg.

He's... He's dragged out every possible,

vicious and malicious criticism of the commander from the other witnesses.

He's forced Queeg to defend himself against them in an open court,

on the spur of the moment, without advice of counsel,

without any of the normal privileges and safeguards

of an accused man under naval law.

Can this court possibly endorse the precedent that

a captain who doesn't please his underlings can be deposed by them?

That this captain's only recourse afterward

is to be placed on the witness stand at a general court-martial

to answer every petty gripe

and to justify all his command decisions to a hostile lawyer

taking the part of his insubordinate inferiors?

Such a precedent is nothing but a blank check for mutiny.

However, all this doesn't worry me, sir.

I'm confident that this court hasn't been impressed by such shyster tactics.

I know this court will reject this cynical play on its emotions,

this insult to its intelligence,

and find the specification proven by the facts.

I've only this to say, sir.

Whatever the verdict on the accused,

I formally recommend that Defense Counsel Greenwald be reprimanded

by this court for conduct unbecoming an officer of the Navy

and that this reprimand be made part of his record.

Defense Counsel, closing argument.

Please the court,

I undertook the defense of the accused very reluctantly,

and only at the urging of the judge advocate

that no other defense counsel was available.

I was reluctant because I knew the only possible defense was to show in court

the mental incompetence of an officer of the Navy.

It has been the most unpleasant duty I've ever had to perform.

Having undertaken it, I did what I could to win an acquittal.

I thought that was my duty, both as defense counsel appointed by the Navy

and as a member of the Bar.

Let me make one thing clear.

It is not, and never has been, the contention of the defense

that Commander Queeg is a coward.

The entire case of the defense rests on the assumption that

no man who rises to the command of a United States Naval ship

could possibly be a coward.

And that therefore, if he commits...

If he commits questionable acts under fire,

the explanation must lie elsewhere.

The court saw the bearing of Captain Queeg on the stand.

The court can picture what his bearing must have been

at the height of a typhoon.

On that basis, the court will decide the fate of the accused.

Lieutenant Greenwald.

Yes, sir.

Lieutenant, this has been a strange and tragic trial.

You presented your case with striking ingenuity.

The judge advocate's remark about shyster tactics was an unfortunate personal slur.

But your conduct has been puzzling, and it does raise questions.

With talent comes responsibility.

Has your conduct here been responsible, Lieutenant Greenwald?

The reprimand, if there's to be one,

must come from your own conscience.

Counsel's words and acts are privileged

under the broad limits of contempt of court.

Court finds the defense counsel has not been in contempt.

Recommendation to reprimand denied.

What happens now? That's the ball game.

When do we find out?

If it's an acquittal, in an hour or so.

If it isn't, they may take weeks before they publish their findings.

Meanwhile, would I be confined?

No, hardly.

What do you think? Listen, you were terrific.

-Thanks. -You murdered Queeg.

Yeah, I murdered him.

I'm grateful to you, win or lose.

Okay.

What's the matter? You bothered by what Challee said? Or Blakely?

No. Why... Why should I be?

I had a job to do. I did it. That's all.

Yeah, well, that's the spirit.

Look, Tom Keefer's throwing a party over at the Fairmont Hotel.

This morning he got a check for 1,000 bucks.

Advance on his novel.

-Good for him. -Yeah.

If he wins the Pulitzer Prize, the Nobel Prize,

the Congressional Medal of Honor,

gets his bust in the Hall of Fame.

We're both invited to the party.

♪ Bottom's up, we've got to go

♪ The captain's gotten loose, you know

♪ We'll have to tie him to the tow ♪

Hey, Willy. Willy, I want you to meet someone.

Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet somebody.

-A friend of mine. This is, this is Huey.

How are you, fellas? Nice to meet you.

That reminds me, I need to call Herman Melville.

Okay, gentlemen, you're in the military?

I got one for you here.

Here you go. Anyone here know what this is?

I don't know. What is it? What is it? What is it?

I don't know, either, but it got me out of the Marine Corps

[ALL LAUGHING]three years early.

Yes, thank you. Matinees at 2:00 and 3:30.

Hey.

Wait a second. All right, quiet! Quiet! You drunken bums of the Caine.

You made it!

Now quiet! Come on, here he is, the man of the... The man of the hour.

Greenwald the Magnificent.

Now, this is the man who won the acquittal.

Come on, let's hear it for him.

Yeah! A toast!

I'm a little drunk to be doing Thomas, the Rhymer tonight.

But to honor this great man, I'll try my best.

"To Lieutenant Barney Greenwald,

"who fought with might and main.

"The terror of judge advocates,

"the massive legal brain.

"Who hit the Navy where it lived

"and made it writhe with pain.

"Who wrought the great deliverance

"for the galley slaves of the Caine.

"And gave us all the Fifth freedom.

"Freedom from Old Yellow Stain!"

-Speech!

-No, no. -Speech!

No, no, I'm drunker than any of you guys.

I've been out drinking with the judge advocate,

tryin' to get him to take back some of those dirty names he called me.

Finally got him to shake hands on the ninth whiskey sour...

That's good. That is good.

You know, I played pretty dirty pool in that court. What's this?

It's a double celebration.

"Multitudes, Multitudes, by Thomas Keefer."

A thousand bucks came in the mail today.

-Advance on my novel. -Yeah.

A thousand bucks, huh?

Well, maybe I should return the toast of our celebrated novelist's little speech, huh?

That was very nice.

-Thank you. -That was very nice.

Well, what is it, a war novel?

What else?

Yeah. Well, I bet you give the, give the Navy a good pasting, huh?

Oh, yeah. I don't think Public Relations would clear it.

Somebody should show up these stuffy, stupid Prussians.

Who's the hero, you?

Well, any resemblance is purely accidental. I promise you.

Yeah. I'm drunk and I'm warped,

but it certainly seems to me that if I wrote a war novel,

I'd make Old Yellow Stain a hero.

I would. I would. I tell you why. I'm serious.

Tell you why.

I'm a Jew. I mean, I guess you all know that.

Jack Challee said I used smart Jew lawyer tactics,

but, you know, anyway,

the reason why I'd make Old Yellow Stain...

The reason why I'd make Old Yellow Stain a hero

is on account of my mother, a little gray-haired...

Little, little gray-haired Jewish lady.

Fat, you know. Of course, you guys all have mothers,

but they wouldn't be in the same bad shape as mine would,

if we'd lost this war, you know?

I mean, Germans aren't kidding about the Jews.

They're... They're cookin' us down to soap over there.

You know, they think we're all vermin, should be exterminated

and our corpses turned into something useful.

Granting the premise, being warped.

I don't, but granting the premise, soap is as good as an idea as any.

I just... I just can't cotton to the idea

of my mother being cooked down to a bar of soap.

You see. I'm comin' to... I'm comin' to Yellow Stain.

I'm comin' to him. See, Mr. Keefer, when I was in law school,

and you were writing your short stories

for national magazines

and little Willie Keith here was on the, on the playing fields of Princeton.

What? Princeton? Cheers to me.

All that time these birds we call regulars,

these stupid, stuffy Prussians,

see, they were standing guard on this fat, dumb, happy country of ours.

Of course they were doing it for dough,

but same as everybody does what they do.

But the question is, the question is in the last analysis...

-Hey, hey, hey, hey. -Why do you do what you do for dough?

See, you and me, what we do for dough,

we're advancing our free little non-Prussian careers.

So, when all hell broke loose and the...

Germans started running out of soap,

they figured time to go get Miss Greenwald. Who's gonna stop 'em?

Not her boy, Barney. Can't stop a Nazi with a law book.

So, I run to learn how to fly.

In the meantime, it's a year and half before I was any good.

Who is keeping Mama out of the soap dish?

Tom Keefer? Communication school.

Willie Keith? Willie Keith? Mid-shipmen school.

Old Yellow Stain, maybe? Why, yes, even poor, sad Queeg.

And most of them not sad at all,

fellows, a lot of them sharper than you and me.

Don't kid yourself.

You can't be good in the Army or Navy unless you're goddamn good.

Come on. Come on.

Unless you're up on Finnegans Wakeand Proust and all of that.

Barney, just forget it! It's all over.

This set is a phony...

This is a dinner -for Christ's sake. -You're guilty!

Course, you're only half guilty.

There's another guy who stayed very neatly out of the picture.

The one who thought up the whole idea

that Queeg was a dangerous paranoiac,

who argued you into it for half a year,

invented the nickname Old Yellow Stain,

had to drag it out of Steve, Mr. Keefer.

Big, dumb fisherman, trying to tell me it was all his own idea.

Doesn't know the difference between a paranoid and an anthropoid.

But you knew. You told him his medical logs

were a clinical picture of a paranoid.

Advised him to go to Halsey. Offered to go with him.

Didn't get cold feet

till you were standing outside Halsey's cabin in the New Jersey.

Then you ducked, you've been ducking ever since.

Hey, I don't know where you got all this, Barney.

The biggest favor you could've done Steve

as far as winning an acquittal, though I doubt you realize it.

But if there's a guilty party at this celebration, Mr. Keefer, it's you.

If you hadn't filled Steve Maryk's thick head

full of paranoia -and Article 184. -I'm not a thick head!

...would've got Queeg to come north or maybe help the poor bastard

-pull through the south. Hey!

That's your contribution to good old USA, Mr. Keefer.

Pulling a mine-sweeper out of the south Pacific when it was most needed.

That and Multitudes, Multitudes!

That's it. I think, you're a little drunk, Barney. That's what I think!

Excuse me, excuse me, Mr. Keefer. I'm all finished. I'm up to the toast.

-Great. -Here's to you!

You bowled a perfect score. You went after Queeg and you got him.

Kept your skirts all white and starchy.

You'll publish your novel, proving the Navy stinks

and you'll make a million bucks and you'll marry Hedy Lamarr.

So you won't mind a little verbal reprimand from me. What does it mean?

I defended Steve 'cause I found out the wrong guy was on trial.

Only way to defend him was to murder Queeg for you.

I'm sorry I was pushed into that spot.

I'm ashamed of what I did.

That's why I'm drunk.

Queeg deserved better at my hands. Don't you see? I owed him a favor!

He stopped Hermann Goering from washing his fat behind with my mother!

Oh, come on.

So, no, Mr. Keefer, I'm not gonna eat your dinner

and I'm not gonna drink your wine,

I'm simply gonna say my toast and go.

Here's to you, Mr. Caine's favorite author,

and here's to your book.

Missed.

Why, for the rest of your life, you'll never wipe off that yellow stain.

Hey, Barney!

See you in Tokyo, mutineer.

♪ Old Yellow Stain blues

Come on. Come on.

You'll get my second chapter, it's the second chapter.

♪ Look up, look up

♪ Look down, look down

♪ Give me that ugly crown

♪ Come on, take them down

♪ I got the Yellow, I got the Yellow Stain blues

This is the romance, this is the romance part.

♪ 'Cause I got some fancy bootleg brew

♪ For all you fellows, I got some news

♪ I've got the Yellow Stain blues

♪ Look up, look up

♪ Look down, look down

♪ Throw me that jacket overboard, I'm going to drown

♪ Going under, somebody help me

Chapter seven.

♪ I've got the Yellow, I've got the Yellow Stain blues

This is my bullet wound.

♪ And when danger comes you've got no time to lose

♪ If you hear that gun, baby, start to run

♪ You've got the Yellow Stain blues

♪ Get up, get up

♪ Don't bend, don't bend

♪ What's that running down my leg?

♪ It's all over my shoes

♪ It's Yellow

♪ It's the Yellow Stain blues ♪