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1
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Everyone you know plays a
different role in your life.
2
00:00:03,379 --> 00:00:05,513
Most of those people
make your life better.
3
00:00:12,255 --> 00:00:15,823
But others, they definitely
make your life worse.
4
00:00:21,831 --> 00:00:25,733
Ugh. Phil Ricozzi.
5
00:00:25,735 --> 00:00:27,468
What's the matter, Riley?
6
00:00:27,470 --> 00:00:28,936
Upset that I'm going out
with the girl of your dreams?
7
00:00:28,938 --> 00:00:30,571
Did you just come here to gloat?
8
00:00:30,573 --> 00:00:31,839
What does gloat mean?
9
00:00:31,841 --> 00:00:33,173
It means to rub it in my face.
10
00:00:33,175 --> 00:00:35,442
Oh, well then yes, I gloat at you.
11
00:00:35,444 --> 00:00:38,178
God, how could someone like Nori go out
with something like you?
12
00:00:38,180 --> 00:00:40,381
I don't know, but she is.
13
00:00:40,383 --> 00:00:42,550
And here's your proof, sucka.
14
00:00:42,552 --> 00:00:45,886
"Phil and Nori forever".
She made you this?
15
00:00:45,888 --> 00:00:48,122
You know what? Keep it.
16
00:00:48,124 --> 00:00:50,224
It'll be a constant reminder that you're
17
00:00:50,226 --> 00:00:53,093
just her stupid friend, and I'm someone
she lets kiss her awesome face.
18
00:00:55,431 --> 00:00:58,699
You just have to hope that eventually
you can put those people behind you
19
00:00:58,701 --> 00:01:00,668
and move on with your life.
20
00:01:01,604 --> 00:01:05,072
Hey, guys, I know you were supposed
to meet with Betty today,
21
00:01:05,074 --> 00:01:06,574
but our new VP heard you were coming in,
22
00:01:06,576 --> 00:01:08,609
and insisted on hearing
the pitch himself.
23
00:01:08,611 --> 00:01:11,278
Apparently, you guys go way back.
24
00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:14,748
What's up, Riley? How is your hot mom?
25
00:01:14,750 --> 00:01:16,390
Phil Ricozzi?
26
00:01:17,553 --> 00:01:20,354
But sometimes,
those people come back into your life
27
00:01:20,356 --> 00:01:22,356
in the most unexpected ways.
28
00:01:22,358 --> 00:01:25,626
Alex, do you remember Phil Ricozzi?
29
00:01:25,628 --> 00:01:27,294
Yes, of course I remember Phil Ricozzi.
30
00:01:27,296 --> 00:01:29,730
That narcissistic jerk
tormented me for years.
31
00:01:29,732 --> 00:01:32,433
Oh, I think today I will
have a Denver omelet.
32
00:01:32,435 --> 00:01:34,602
He died.
33
00:01:34,604 --> 00:01:36,170
Oh.
34
00:01:36,172 --> 00:01:40,140
Well, may the narcissistic
jerk rest in peace.
35
00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:41,942
And a toasted bagel, please.
36
00:01:49,508 --> 00:01:53,043
Alex Riley, it's been 25 years.
37
00:01:53,045 --> 00:01:55,278
- Is that you, One Nut?
- I prefer Darryl.
38
00:01:55,330 --> 00:01:56,663
Why? Is that your real name?
39
00:01:56,665 --> 00:01:58,799
I would've thought
your medical condition
40
00:01:58,801 --> 00:02:00,333
would've stunted your growth,
but look at you!
41
00:02:00,335 --> 00:02:01,768
You're the size of a man!
42
00:02:01,770 --> 00:02:03,370
- And you're an a...
- So, Phil, uh...
43
00:02:03,372 --> 00:02:05,172
What are you doing in the VC business?
44
00:02:05,174 --> 00:02:06,640
I thought you were into
the whole acting thing.
45
00:02:06,642 --> 00:02:08,175
Nah, I did a bunch of commercials.
46
00:02:08,177 --> 00:02:09,876
And I frenched Tara Reid
in a Lifetime movie.
47
00:02:09,878 --> 00:02:11,678
- Sorry.
- But then I realized
48
00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:14,447
the real money is in this VC world.
49
00:02:14,449 --> 00:02:16,183
You would never believe how rich I am.
50
00:02:16,185 --> 00:02:17,951
And they say nice guys finish last.
51
00:02:17,953 --> 00:02:19,853
- True that, One Nut.
- I prefer Darryl.
52
00:02:20,387 --> 00:02:21,955
It's really good to see you guys.
53
00:02:21,957 --> 00:02:23,924
Really? 'Cause I'm a little thrown.
54
00:02:23,926 --> 00:02:25,692
I feel like in middle school,
you and I were...
55
00:02:25,694 --> 00:02:27,327
Kids. That's all we were.
56
00:02:27,329 --> 00:02:29,496
But as far as this guy's concerned,
57
00:02:29,498 --> 00:02:31,865
everyone I grew up with, they're family.
58
00:02:31,867 --> 00:02:33,800
You know,
in that Olive Garden type of way.
59
00:02:33,802 --> 00:02:36,803
Not that I eat there.
Again, super successful.
60
00:02:36,805 --> 00:02:40,540
So what are we waiting for?
Let's go hear this genius idea!
61
00:02:42,578 --> 00:02:45,178
I don't know, man. I smell a rat.
62
00:02:45,180 --> 00:02:46,680
What? Do you think this guy brought us
63
00:02:46,682 --> 00:02:48,014
all the way down here just
to laugh in our faces?
64
00:02:48,016 --> 00:02:51,051
- Yeah, that's exactly what I think.
- Yeah, so do I.
65
00:02:51,053 --> 00:02:52,752
Come on, people change, right?
I mean, look at you!
66
00:02:52,754 --> 00:02:53,648
What about me?
67
00:02:53,689 --> 00:02:55,889
Yeah, you grew up
to be the size of a man!
68
00:02:57,659 --> 00:02:59,593
Hey, how'd you do
on that female anatomy test?
69
00:02:59,595 --> 00:03:03,263
I think I spelled "fallopian" wrong,
but I definitely got "boobs" right.
70
00:03:03,265 --> 00:03:04,698
It's "breasts".
71
00:03:04,700 --> 00:03:06,566
- Oh, boy.
- Yeah.
72
00:03:06,568 --> 00:03:09,169
- Hey, Alex.
- Hey, Nori.
73
00:03:09,171 --> 00:03:11,004
Have you been avoiding me
because I've been spending
74
00:03:11,006 --> 00:03:12,973
so much time with Phil Ricozzi?
75
00:03:12,975 --> 00:03:14,975
I know you think
he's a little bit of a jerk.
76
00:03:14,977 --> 00:03:17,510
That's not true.
I think he's a lot of a jerk.
77
00:03:17,512 --> 00:03:21,481
I promise if you give Phil a chance,
you'd realize he's a really good guy.
78
00:03:24,686 --> 00:03:25,952
Where did you get this?
79
00:03:25,954 --> 00:03:27,687
- Phil gave it to me.
- Why?
80
00:03:27,689 --> 00:03:29,623
To rub it in your face
that I'm his girlfriend?
81
00:03:31,655 --> 00:03:32,659
Nah.
82
00:03:32,661 --> 00:03:35,095
A good guy like Phil would
never do something like that.
83
00:03:35,097 --> 00:03:37,097
Anyway, see you.
84
00:03:40,068 --> 00:03:41,768
I don't like this.
85
00:03:41,770 --> 00:03:44,337
I don't like this at all.
86
00:03:44,339 --> 00:03:45,839
We're getting to that
age where our friends
87
00:03:45,841 --> 00:03:47,207
are starting to die off.
88
00:03:47,209 --> 00:03:50,510
It's 2042, you'd think they'd have cured
this whole death thing by now.
89
00:03:50,512 --> 00:03:52,612
So, Phil's memorial
is planned for Thursday.
90
00:03:52,614 --> 00:03:54,047
Oh, well you're not
actually thinking about
91
00:03:54,049 --> 00:03:55,482
going to that thing, are you?
92
00:03:55,484 --> 00:03:57,784
The guy treated me
unforgivably, Eleanor.
93
00:03:57,786 --> 00:04:00,553
Well, now that he's gone,
maybe it's time that you forgave him,
94
00:04:00,555 --> 00:04:01,755
so why don't you come with me...
95
00:04:02,521 --> 00:04:03,290
No.
96
00:04:03,292 --> 00:04:05,358
No, no, no, no, no. There's no way
97
00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:07,360
I'm going to Phil Ricozzi's
memorial service.
98
00:04:07,362 --> 00:04:09,696
You're gonna make me go all alone?
99
00:04:12,301 --> 00:04:13,600
Let me ask you something.
100
00:04:13,602 --> 00:04:14,852
Do you think that after we die,
101
00:04:14,870 --> 00:04:18,405
we can still see all the stuff
that's going on around us?
102
00:04:18,407 --> 00:04:20,840
You know something? I actually do.
103
00:04:20,842 --> 00:04:23,510
Fine. I'll go.
104
00:04:23,512 --> 00:04:25,645
But just so that Phil
Ricozzi is pissed off
105
00:04:25,647 --> 00:04:27,847
when he sees you and I walk in together.
106
00:04:27,849 --> 00:04:30,216
And that is the Baby Glide.
107
00:04:30,218 --> 00:04:32,519
A combination stroller and skateboard.
108
00:04:32,521 --> 00:04:35,622
For the hipster who wants
to get a little bit wild...
109
00:04:35,624 --> 00:04:38,124
Pushing their child!
110
00:04:38,126 --> 00:04:40,894
So what do you think?
111
00:04:40,896 --> 00:04:43,163
- I hate it.
- Hate?
112
00:04:43,165 --> 00:04:44,998
That's a pretty strong word,
113
00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,808
usually reserved for things
like human trafficking and cauliflower.
114
00:04:47,903 --> 00:04:51,705
I hate that I didn't
think of this myself.
115
00:04:51,707 --> 00:04:53,740
Gentlemen, you have a sale!
116
00:04:53,742 --> 00:04:55,375
- Seriously?
- Seriously!
117
00:04:55,377 --> 00:04:56,886
- Yes!
- This idea's brilliant!
118
00:04:56,913 --> 00:04:59,012
Come here! I want to hug it out!
Get over here, you!
119
00:04:59,014 --> 00:05:00,480
- Okay.
- You too!
120
00:05:00,482 --> 00:05:02,115
Look at me, I'm hugging Phil Ricozzi.
121
00:05:02,117 --> 00:05:04,351
I'm hugging Alex Riley, and uh...
I'm sorry.
122
00:05:04,353 --> 00:05:05,952
I can't remember your real name.
123
00:05:05,954 --> 00:05:08,421
It's One Nut, baby.
Just call me One Nut!
124
00:05:08,423 --> 00:05:10,890
One Nut! Look at us!
125
00:05:10,892 --> 00:05:13,560
Big news, everybody.
Nori just broke up with Phil.
126
00:05:13,562 --> 00:05:15,061
How do you know?
127
00:05:15,063 --> 00:05:17,664
I have a network of
carefully cultivated spies
128
00:05:17,666 --> 00:05:19,766
scattered throughout the school.
129
00:05:19,768 --> 00:05:23,570
I can't believe Nori broke up with me.
130
00:05:23,572 --> 00:05:26,406
I think Nori broke up with Phil.
131
00:05:26,408 --> 00:05:28,508
I'm sorry, but I just
can't reveal my sources.
132
00:05:28,510 --> 00:05:30,477
- This is fantastic!
- Why?
133
00:05:30,479 --> 00:05:32,112
You think she's gonna go out with you?
134
00:05:32,114 --> 00:05:34,781
As my grandmother would say, pu-shaw!
135
00:05:34,783 --> 00:05:37,250
Hey, as long as she is not with Phil,
I am good.
136
00:05:37,252 --> 00:05:40,120
Is that why you gave Nori the heart?
To break us up?
137
00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:42,055
No, but maybe you shouldn't have used it
138
00:05:42,057 --> 00:05:44,024
to flaunt your relationship
in front of me.
139
00:05:44,026 --> 00:05:45,959
"Flaunt?" That means "gloat."
140
00:05:47,329 --> 00:05:50,030
"Gloat" means to rub it in my face.
141
00:05:50,032 --> 00:05:52,365
I'll tell you what I'm gonna
rub in your face, the floor.
142
00:05:52,367 --> 00:05:54,200
That's right, Chokey.
You and me after school,
143
00:05:54,202 --> 00:05:55,335
we're gonna fight.
144
00:05:56,772 --> 00:05:58,304
What? I...
145
00:05:58,306 --> 00:06:00,640
- Like a fist fight?
- Not like a fist fight.
146
00:06:00,642 --> 00:06:02,876
A fist fight,
with my fist fighting your face,
147
00:06:02,878 --> 00:06:04,644
and your face fighting
to stay in one piece.
148
00:06:06,314 --> 00:06:08,348
But could we do it
after school tomorrow?
149
00:06:08,350 --> 00:06:10,517
Today I've got an audition for
a Purina Dog Chow commercial.
150
00:06:10,519 --> 00:06:13,553
You do? Cool, good luck!
151
00:06:13,555 --> 00:06:14,644
Whose side are you on?
152
00:06:14,657 --> 00:06:19,059
Yours, but Purina Dog Chow?
That's a huge campaign.
153
00:06:22,197 --> 00:06:23,693
To the future of the Baby Glide.
154
00:06:23,737 --> 00:06:25,888
Ahh, it feels good to make a sale.
155
00:06:25,905 --> 00:06:27,705
Yeah, I was starting to get
worried about my career.
156
00:06:27,707 --> 00:06:29,206
Starting to get worried?
157
00:06:29,208 --> 00:06:31,742
You've been living in
my garage for 223 days!
158
00:06:31,744 --> 00:06:33,611
- But who's counting?
- Your wife.
159
00:06:33,613 --> 00:06:35,446
Your wife is counting.
She has a calendar
160
00:06:35,448 --> 00:06:36,914
with check marks on it
in the laundry room.
161
00:06:36,916 --> 00:06:38,182
I've seen it.
162
00:06:38,184 --> 00:06:39,506
It makes me sad.
163
00:06:40,620 --> 00:06:43,154
Hey, it's the lady
from Phil Ricozzi's office.
164
00:06:43,156 --> 00:06:45,389
Hello, lady from Phil Ricozzi's office.
165
00:06:45,391 --> 00:06:47,325
Sorry to bother you at home.
166
00:06:47,327 --> 00:06:49,327
Phil wanted me to bring over
a copy of the signed contracts
167
00:06:49,329 --> 00:06:51,028
to declare that the
deal is now official.
168
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:53,531
This is awesome.
Do you want to do the dance?
169
00:06:53,533 --> 00:06:54,865
- In front of her?
- Yeah, no.
170
00:06:54,867 --> 00:06:55,912
I think she'll like it.
171
00:06:56,002 --> 00:06:59,070
♪ We are gonna be rich
We are gonna be rich ♪
172
00:06:59,072 --> 00:07:00,504
Come on, join us! ♪ We are... ♪
173
00:07:00,506 --> 00:07:02,006
There's actually one more thing.
174
00:07:02,008 --> 00:07:04,875
He also wanted me to
deliver this message.
175
00:07:04,877 --> 00:07:07,011
"The Baby Glide project is now dead.
176
00:07:07,013 --> 00:07:09,146
"I am burying it,
it will never get made,
177
00:07:09,148 --> 00:07:10,915
"and since your profits
are based on sales,
178
00:07:10,917 --> 00:07:14,018
You will effectively
be making nothing, suckas."
179
00:07:14,020 --> 00:07:16,487
He made me say "suckas",
I thought it was piling on.
180
00:07:16,489 --> 00:07:18,189
You were right. It was.
181
00:07:18,191 --> 00:07:20,024
Why would he send you
here to tell us that?
182
00:07:20,026 --> 00:07:22,093
I mean, he could've just sent an e-mail.
183
00:07:22,095 --> 00:07:24,028
He wanted to see the looks on your faces
184
00:07:24,030 --> 00:07:26,330
when you heard it was
never going to get made.
185
00:07:26,332 --> 00:07:29,400
- But he's not even here.
- Again, not my idea.
186
00:07:31,204 --> 00:07:33,170
I really apologize.
187
00:07:37,610 --> 00:07:41,445
- ♪ We're not gonna be rich ♪
- Too soon.
188
00:07:41,447 --> 00:07:44,248
What am I... what am I gonna do?
I can't fight Phil!
189
00:07:44,250 --> 00:07:46,217
I've never been punched!
190
00:07:46,219 --> 00:07:47,885
I've gotta get out of this!
191
00:07:47,887 --> 00:07:49,787
Too late. Once someone
publicly challenges you
192
00:07:49,789 --> 00:07:51,822
to a fight, there is no turning back.
193
00:07:51,824 --> 00:07:53,290
Those are the rules.
194
00:07:53,292 --> 00:07:55,760
- What rules?
- The rules of childhood!
195
00:07:55,762 --> 00:07:58,095
They're often cruel,
but they're there to keep us safe.
196
00:07:58,097 --> 00:08:00,264
God, I can't believe
I'm gonna be in a fight.
197
00:08:00,266 --> 00:08:03,033
Did I just hear there's
gonna be a fight?
198
00:08:03,035 --> 00:08:05,669
Now, the most important
thing to remember
199
00:08:05,671 --> 00:08:08,939
is that the real fight starts
before the fight, okay?
200
00:08:08,941 --> 00:08:10,408
That's when you gotta
get into your opponent's
201
00:08:10,410 --> 00:08:12,877
psychological weak spots,
and exploit 'em!
202
00:08:12,879 --> 00:08:15,045
You understand what I'm saying,
you nervous little nerd
203
00:08:15,047 --> 00:08:16,480
who spits when he talks?
204
00:08:16,482 --> 00:08:18,649
- What?
- It's hurtful, I know,
205
00:08:18,651 --> 00:08:20,317
but I'm trying to
build up your tolerance
206
00:08:20,319 --> 00:08:21,986
so he can't get inside your head,
207
00:08:21,988 --> 00:08:24,422
you frazzled little prepubescent geek!
208
00:08:24,424 --> 00:08:26,457
- Hey.
- Come on.
209
00:08:26,459 --> 00:08:28,125
He's gonna come at you with worse,
210
00:08:28,127 --> 00:08:29,994
and I want you to be prepared!
211
00:08:29,996 --> 00:08:32,863
Now go ahead, you practice on me.
212
00:08:32,865 --> 00:08:34,432
- No.
- Do it!
213
00:08:34,434 --> 00:08:38,769
Okay, find my weak spot
and nail me on it!
214
00:08:38,771 --> 00:08:40,571
I can't believe my mom
was ever attracted
215
00:08:40,573 --> 00:08:44,375
to a guy with two completely
different-sized ears.
216
00:08:44,377 --> 00:08:46,677
Wow.
217
00:08:46,679 --> 00:08:51,048
That's how you're gonna talk to a man
who's trying to help you, huh?
218
00:08:51,050 --> 00:08:53,784
Just... Wow.
219
00:08:56,956 --> 00:09:00,958
Alex, what can I do for you
on this beautiful day?
220
00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:02,593
Why are you burying my project?
221
00:09:02,595 --> 00:09:04,829
You really love that Baby Glide,
don't you?
222
00:09:04,831 --> 00:09:06,697
Yeah, the Baby Glide is my baby.
223
00:09:06,699 --> 00:09:08,532
If I could, I would push
my Baby Glide around
224
00:09:08,534 --> 00:09:10,067
inside of another Baby Glide.
225
00:09:10,069 --> 00:09:13,637
Man, doesn't it suck to love something,
226
00:09:13,639 --> 00:09:16,307
have someone come around
and ruin it for you?
227
00:09:16,309 --> 00:09:17,808
What are you talking about?
228
00:09:17,810 --> 00:09:21,145
Nori Sterling.
Payback's a bitch, Chokey.
229
00:09:21,147 --> 00:09:23,614
Nori Sterling?
That was like 25 years ago!
230
00:09:23,616 --> 00:09:27,318
My life might be completely different
if you hadn't broken us up!
231
00:09:27,320 --> 00:09:29,186
Who knows?
232
00:09:29,188 --> 00:09:31,622
That might've been my
"Sliding Doors" moment.
233
00:09:31,624 --> 00:09:33,157
"Sliding Doors"? What?
234
00:09:33,159 --> 00:09:34,792
It's a movie with Gwyneth Paltrow,
235
00:09:34,794 --> 00:09:37,828
where the doors on the train close
and she's unable to get on.
236
00:09:37,830 --> 00:09:39,964
Changed the entire course of her life.
237
00:09:39,966 --> 00:09:41,465
It actually sounds pretty good.
238
00:09:41,467 --> 00:09:43,200
It is worth a watch, if it's on TV.
239
00:09:43,202 --> 00:09:45,035
Yeah, no, okay, you seem to love it.
I'll check it out.
240
00:09:45,037 --> 00:09:47,571
That was like 25 years ago, man.
We were just kids!
241
00:09:47,573 --> 00:09:49,473
Yeah, well now we're adults.
242
00:09:49,475 --> 00:09:53,077
And one of us has money
and power, which means I win.
243
00:09:56,849 --> 00:09:59,683
- Which means you lose.
- I know what you meant, Phil.
244
00:09:59,685 --> 00:10:01,018
Good morning, Abby.
245
00:10:01,020 --> 00:10:02,653
Ooh, look at you, wearing a tie.
246
00:10:02,655 --> 00:10:05,823
Are congratulations or
condolences in order?
247
00:10:05,825 --> 00:10:07,525
Little of both.
248
00:10:07,527 --> 00:10:09,026
Phil Ricozzi died.
249
00:10:09,028 --> 00:10:10,694
I'm going to his memorial service.
250
00:10:10,696 --> 00:10:12,263
Phil Ricozzi?
251
00:10:12,265 --> 00:10:13,998
Didn't we used to throw eggs
at his house on Halloween?
252
00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:17,468
Yes, yes, never knew it was us, either.
253
00:10:17,470 --> 00:10:19,303
So why are you going to
his memorial service?
254
00:10:19,305 --> 00:10:21,572
Eleanor talked me into it.
We're going together.
255
00:10:21,574 --> 00:10:24,575
Eleanor? Ugh, Dad,
I thought you were over her.
256
00:10:24,577 --> 00:10:26,010
I am!
257
00:10:26,012 --> 00:10:27,845
You're going on a sneaky date!
258
00:10:27,847 --> 00:10:29,480
- Wha...
- You're all dressed up,
259
00:10:29,482 --> 00:10:31,649
it's emotional,
plus Ricozzi sent a time,
260
00:10:31,651 --> 00:10:33,217
which means there will be a lot of wine,
261
00:10:33,219 --> 00:10:34,919
- which leads to...
- Don't say it!
262
00:10:34,921 --> 00:10:36,053
Sneaky date!
263
00:10:36,055 --> 00:10:37,454
It's not a sneaky date.
264
00:10:37,456 --> 00:10:39,123
Okay, fine.
265
00:10:39,125 --> 00:10:42,393
I was gonna tell you that a blue tie
would go better with your eyes,
266
00:10:42,395 --> 00:10:44,461
but if it's not a date, doesn't matter.
267
00:10:44,463 --> 00:10:46,063
Doesn't matter, you're right.
268
00:10:46,065 --> 00:10:48,599
- Love you. Go Bulls!
- Love you. Go Bulls!
269
00:10:55,675 --> 00:10:58,976
I guess there's nothing
wrong looking your best.
270
00:10:58,978 --> 00:11:00,377
Yo, Chokey.
271
00:11:00,379 --> 00:11:02,479
Today after school, you're going down!
272
00:11:02,481 --> 00:11:04,548
Oh, hey, Phil.
How was your dog chow audition?
273
00:11:04,550 --> 00:11:06,383
I destroyed it, like today after school,
274
00:11:06,385 --> 00:11:08,118
I'm gonna destroy your face.
275
00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:09,753
Cool, so you got the part.
276
00:11:09,755 --> 00:11:11,455
Yeah, I got the part.
And today, after school,
277
00:11:11,457 --> 00:11:13,023
I'm gonna rip you a-part.
278
00:11:13,025 --> 00:11:14,592
I bet you will.
279
00:11:14,594 --> 00:11:17,461
You know, I just hate to see you lose
that dog chow commercial.
280
00:11:17,463 --> 00:11:18,929
What are you talking about?
281
00:11:18,931 --> 00:11:20,506
I mean, if by some crazy miracle
282
00:11:20,533 --> 00:11:23,734
I happen to land one of my weak
little punches on your face...
283
00:11:23,736 --> 00:11:25,269
The moneymaker!
284
00:11:25,271 --> 00:11:26,503
Yeah, they'd never
let you film that thing.
285
00:11:26,505 --> 00:11:27,638
Just be careful, okay?
286
00:11:27,640 --> 00:11:29,340
I'll see you today after school.
287
00:11:29,342 --> 00:11:31,709
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I can't take that risk!
288
00:11:31,711 --> 00:11:33,143
The moneymaker's too valuable,
289
00:11:33,145 --> 00:11:35,212
that's why they call it the moneymaker!
290
00:11:35,214 --> 00:11:37,314
Then I guess we're gonna
have to call off the fight.
291
00:11:37,316 --> 00:11:38,616
God, that sucks!
292
00:11:38,618 --> 00:11:40,551
I was really looking forward to it too.
293
00:11:40,553 --> 00:11:42,319
We can't call off the fight.
294
00:11:42,321 --> 00:11:45,122
Everyone will think we're the
biggest cowards in school.
295
00:11:45,124 --> 00:11:48,792
Hey, I know,
how about we fake the fight?
296
00:11:48,794 --> 00:11:50,904
- Fake the fight?
- Yeah, like a stage fight.
297
00:11:50,939 --> 00:11:51,795
You really think that'll work?
298
00:11:51,797 --> 00:11:53,998
Of course it'll work!
You just have to sell it.
299
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,066
Before the fight,
you should yell out, "Hey, Phil!
300
00:11:56,068 --> 00:11:58,502
I've always hated you
'cause you're better looking than me!"
301
00:11:58,504 --> 00:11:59,837
I can make up my own lines.
302
00:11:59,839 --> 00:12:02,172
Okay, but I've studied improv.
303
00:12:02,174 --> 00:12:03,874
Making up lines is way
harder than it looks.
304
00:12:03,876 --> 00:12:05,576
Yeah? I think I'll manage.
305
00:12:05,578 --> 00:12:07,344
The only problem is I've
been taking acting classes
306
00:12:07,346 --> 00:12:08,879
since I was three!
307
00:12:08,881 --> 00:12:10,180
How can I possibly teach
you everything I know
308
00:12:10,182 --> 00:12:11,915
about stage combat in one hour?
309
00:12:11,917 --> 00:12:13,183
Don't you just pretend to
hit me and then I go...
310
00:12:14,420 --> 00:12:17,421
Yeah, that's pretty much it.
311
00:12:17,423 --> 00:12:19,223
I just can't believe I'm an adult man,
312
00:12:19,225 --> 00:12:21,725
and I'm still getting
bullied by Phil Ricozzi.
313
00:12:21,727 --> 00:12:25,295
I let him call me One Nut.
Told him I liked it.
314
00:12:25,297 --> 00:12:27,398
- I feel dirty.
- Boys, boys, boys.
315
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:28,885
You want to get back at the bully,
316
00:12:28,935 --> 00:12:32,069
the worst thing you can do is
show him that he got your goat.
317
00:12:32,071 --> 00:12:34,838
He did get my goat.
My goat has been gotten.
318
00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:36,707
This might surprise you,
but back in my day,
319
00:12:36,709 --> 00:12:37,970
I was a bit of a bully.
320
00:12:38,078 --> 00:12:40,577
It does not surprise me, Ron.
You seem to always bring it up
321
00:12:40,579 --> 00:12:42,012
whenever you want to give me advice.
322
00:12:42,014 --> 00:12:44,281
Well, back in those days, the second
323
00:12:44,283 --> 00:12:47,918
some dweeb didn't seem to care,
it took all the fun out of it,
324
00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:50,454
and I'd fold like an origami duck.
325
00:12:50,456 --> 00:12:52,356
Goats, ducks. What are you saying?
326
00:12:52,358 --> 00:12:55,359
I'm saying you may never
get back your invention,
327
00:12:55,361 --> 00:12:59,663
but you sure as hell can go
there and get back your goat!
328
00:12:59,665 --> 00:13:01,598
You were a bad kid, weren't you?
329
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:05,903
I did some things I regret.
But God, they were fun!
330
00:13:09,675 --> 00:13:11,575
Why do they always put
up pictures of people
331
00:13:11,577 --> 00:13:13,210
30 years before they died?
332
00:13:13,212 --> 00:13:14,478
What's wrong with the older years?
333
00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:15,813
Well, not everyone ages well.
334
00:13:15,815 --> 00:13:18,782
Clearly not a problem for you.
335
00:13:18,784 --> 00:13:21,218
Aw, that is so sweet.
336
00:13:21,220 --> 00:13:24,154
Oh, Phil, I hope you can see this.
337
00:13:24,156 --> 00:13:25,723
Why am I looking up?
338
00:13:25,725 --> 00:13:28,926
Uh, hello, I'm Joan Ricozzi,
Phil's cousin.
339
00:13:28,928 --> 00:13:30,928
Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss.
340
00:13:30,930 --> 00:13:32,896
I'm Eleanor.
341
00:13:32,898 --> 00:13:34,364
Alex Riley.
342
00:13:34,366 --> 00:13:36,400
- The inventor?
- Mm.
343
00:13:36,402 --> 00:13:39,937
Oh my God, Phil would've been thrilled
to know that you were here.
344
00:13:39,939 --> 00:13:41,605
I would like to think he does know,
345
00:13:41,607 --> 00:13:44,308
and that I came with this one.
346
00:13:44,310 --> 00:13:46,610
Would you mind saying a
few words about Phil today?
347
00:13:46,612 --> 00:13:50,881
Me? No, I don't...
I don't think that's a good idea.
348
00:13:50,883 --> 00:13:52,416
You know,
Phil would always tell his friends
349
00:13:52,418 --> 00:13:55,652
that he grew up with the Alex Riley.
350
00:13:55,654 --> 00:13:58,722
Please? Just a little
about what he meant to you.
351
00:13:58,724 --> 00:14:00,657
- I really don't...
- Of course he would.
352
00:14:00,659 --> 00:14:04,495
...have a choice, I guess.
353
00:14:16,953 --> 00:14:18,270
Here, little bro. Sign this.
354
00:14:18,272 --> 00:14:20,372
- What is it?
- An organ donor form.
355
00:14:20,374 --> 00:14:21,544
You've got a great heart,
356
00:14:21,575 --> 00:14:23,018
and I want to make sure
someone worthy gets it.
357
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:25,344
- I'm not gonna die.
- There it is.
358
00:14:25,346 --> 00:14:27,038
- Kid's all heart.
- No.
359
00:14:27,081 --> 00:14:31,350
Look, you can't tell anyone,
but I struck a deal with Phil.
360
00:14:31,352 --> 00:14:33,051
No real punches,
the whole thing is fake.
361
00:14:33,053 --> 00:14:34,586
- That's brilliant!
- Mm-hmm.
362
00:14:34,588 --> 00:14:35,710
It's a shame you're not gonna die,
363
00:14:35,756 --> 00:14:37,656
someone could've really used that brain.
364
00:14:37,658 --> 00:14:40,692
Yo, Alex. You ready to do this?
365
00:14:40,694 --> 00:14:45,731
Yeah, I've never been more,
you know, ready...
366
00:14:45,733 --> 00:14:48,967
to do... anything.
367
00:14:50,404 --> 00:14:53,171
Wow, it is hard making up lines.
368
00:14:56,377 --> 00:14:58,310
I forget, who goes first?
369
00:14:58,312 --> 00:15:00,011
- I thought I went first.
- I thought I went first.
370
00:15:00,013 --> 00:15:01,313
Then go first!
371
00:15:09,556 --> 00:15:11,523
Alex ain't even touching him.
372
00:15:11,525 --> 00:15:13,892
He's using the Force.
373
00:15:13,894 --> 00:15:16,161
He is? Gnarly.
374
00:15:48,829 --> 00:15:49,961
Stop this at once!
375
00:15:51,765 --> 00:15:53,231
What's going on here?
376
00:15:53,233 --> 00:15:55,767
Riley, Ricozzi, my office right now!
377
00:15:55,769 --> 00:15:57,436
- You don't understand.
- No, you don't understand.
378
00:15:57,438 --> 00:15:59,471
Fighting comes with an
automatic suspension.
379
00:15:59,473 --> 00:16:01,924
But we weren't really fighting.
380
00:16:02,675 --> 00:16:06,711
- We were fake fighting.
- You were fake fighting?
381
00:16:10,250 --> 00:16:13,485
Fakers! Fakers! Fakers!
382
00:16:13,587 --> 00:16:16,488
Fakers! Fakers! Fakers!
383
00:16:19,660 --> 00:16:22,828
First, you lost me my girl,
now you lost me my rep.
384
00:16:22,830 --> 00:16:25,330
I'm sorry, Phil. I get how you feel.
385
00:16:25,332 --> 00:16:27,166
I've been there.
386
00:16:27,174 --> 00:16:28,944
Just know that you can always sit with
387
00:16:29,036 --> 00:16:30,368
me and my buddies at lunch,
and we can...
388
00:16:34,107 --> 00:16:36,174
- Phil!
- Whoa!
389
00:16:37,778 --> 00:16:39,010
Alex?
390
00:16:39,012 --> 00:16:41,913
What are you doing here?
391
00:16:41,915 --> 00:16:43,782
I watched "Sliding Doors".
392
00:16:43,784 --> 00:16:45,617
It's a heck of a movie, man.
Classic Paltrow.
393
00:16:45,619 --> 00:16:48,753
Okay. Now, I'm scared.
394
00:16:48,755 --> 00:16:50,355
Don't be, man. Everything's fine.
395
00:16:50,357 --> 00:16:52,023
I just wanted you to let you know
396
00:16:52,025 --> 00:16:53,925
that I understand why you
buried the Baby Glide.
397
00:16:53,927 --> 00:16:57,429
I hurt you in eighth grade,
you got me back 25 years later.
398
00:16:57,431 --> 00:16:59,197
It's perfectly reasonable.
399
00:16:59,199 --> 00:17:00,398
So you're not upset with me?
400
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:02,701
No, and you know why?
401
00:17:02,703 --> 00:17:04,803
- 'Cause I still have my goat.
- Your goat?
402
00:17:04,805 --> 00:17:07,320
Yeah, it was this thing you had
to have heard from earlier...
403
00:17:07,375 --> 00:17:10,041
Trust me, it makes sense,
but you know what the difference
404
00:17:10,043 --> 00:17:10,965
between you and me is, Phil?
405
00:17:11,045 --> 00:17:14,246
I'm rich, I drive an Audi,
and I date a boat show model?
406
00:17:14,248 --> 00:17:18,884
No, well, yes, but also,
you rely on other people's ideas.
407
00:17:18,886 --> 00:17:20,352
People like me.
408
00:17:20,360 --> 00:17:22,721
If you keep burning bridges,
you're gonna fail at this,
409
00:17:22,723 --> 00:17:24,155
just like you did at acting.
410
00:17:24,157 --> 00:17:24,996
You take that back!
411
00:17:25,092 --> 00:17:26,898
I saw your Lifetime movie, buddy.
412
00:17:26,961 --> 00:17:29,928
Your acting made Tara Reid
look like Dame Judi Dench.
413
00:17:31,298 --> 00:17:34,366
He was sweetest to his nieces,
Laci and Jennifer.
414
00:17:34,368 --> 00:17:36,835
And even though he didn't
have children of his own...
415
00:17:36,837 --> 00:17:39,204
You are going to say
something nice, aren't you?
416
00:17:39,206 --> 00:17:40,672
Of course.
417
00:17:40,674 --> 00:17:41,940
Not to mention the friendships...
418
00:17:41,942 --> 00:17:45,577
I have a good opener about him
probably not being a murderer.
419
00:17:45,579 --> 00:17:46,878
That's nice, right?
420
00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:51,182
And now, I'd like to invite up
a very close friend of Phil's,
421
00:17:51,184 --> 00:17:53,518
Alex Riley, to say a few words.
422
00:18:00,794 --> 00:18:04,362
Phil was... well, he was always...
423
00:18:08,201 --> 00:18:11,436
All right, look, the truth is
that Phil was a jerk to me.
424
00:18:13,240 --> 00:18:15,106
It's true!
I don't know what else to say,
425
00:18:15,108 --> 00:18:18,043
I mean the guy sucker
punched me in the face twice.
426
00:18:18,045 --> 00:18:20,045
Who does that?
427
00:18:20,047 --> 00:18:21,680
I mean...
428
00:18:21,682 --> 00:18:24,382
When I was a kid,
I was afraid of being punched,
429
00:18:24,384 --> 00:18:26,885
so I guess in a strange way,
430
00:18:26,887 --> 00:18:31,590
Phil did teach me how to face my fears.
431
00:18:31,592 --> 00:18:34,659
And also, that something you
thought was going to be bad
432
00:18:34,661 --> 00:18:37,362
can turn out to be better
than you ever imagined.
433
00:18:37,364 --> 00:18:40,098
Alex! You okay?
434
00:18:40,100 --> 00:18:41,399
Yeah, I'm fine.
435
00:18:41,401 --> 00:18:43,234
Are you kidding? He's great!
436
00:18:43,236 --> 00:18:45,136
Surviving a Phil Ricozzi
punch to the face
437
00:18:45,138 --> 00:18:47,639
raises school cred by at least 27%.
438
00:18:49,843 --> 00:18:51,810
Totally worth it, right?
439
00:18:51,812 --> 00:18:54,112
Oh, yeah.
440
00:19:01,088 --> 00:19:04,255
Now that I'm thinking about it,
he also taught me
441
00:19:04,257 --> 00:19:08,526
that motivation can come
from the most unlikely of places.
442
00:19:08,528 --> 00:19:12,397
And that success is the best revenge.
443
00:19:15,035 --> 00:19:16,935
It's 3:00 a.m. What are you doing up?
444
00:19:16,937 --> 00:19:19,004
I'm inspired like I
haven't been in years.
445
00:19:19,006 --> 00:19:20,349
We didn't get the Baby Glide back.
446
00:19:20,407 --> 00:19:23,274
Yeah, but that's motivated me
to come up with even better ideas.
447
00:19:23,276 --> 00:19:25,110
Easy-open applesauce jar.
448
00:19:25,112 --> 00:19:27,278
A clothing material that repels lint.
449
00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:29,481
An app for your phone
that walks your dog!
450
00:19:29,483 --> 00:19:30,424
A phone walks your dog?
451
00:19:30,518 --> 00:19:32,550
Yeah, it's got like a leash
attachment that you put on...
452
00:19:32,586 --> 00:19:34,219
Look, they can't all be winners.
453
00:19:34,221 --> 00:19:35,987
- Yeah.
- But mark my words,
454
00:19:35,989 --> 00:19:38,056
in five years, we're gonna
have a company ten times
455
00:19:38,058 --> 00:19:40,859
- the size of Phil Ricozzi's.
- Damn straight.
456
00:19:40,861 --> 00:19:42,260
Hey, you know what I think we should do?
457
00:19:42,262 --> 00:19:44,496
Don't you even say another word.
458
00:19:44,498 --> 00:19:48,233
♪ We are gonna be rich
We are gonna be rich ♪
459
00:19:48,235 --> 00:19:49,300
Give me the money, give me the money.
460
00:19:49,336 --> 00:19:52,570
♪ We are gonna be rich
We are gonna be rich ♪
461
00:19:52,572 --> 00:19:54,372
♪ We are gonna be rich ♪
462
00:19:54,374 --> 00:19:57,876
One of those inventions
led to my greatest success,
463
00:19:57,878 --> 00:20:03,148
which made Riley Industries
known the world over.
464
00:20:03,150 --> 00:20:08,086
So I guess the truth is
that without Phil Ricozzi,
465
00:20:08,088 --> 00:20:10,422
I wouldn't be who I am today.
466
00:20:10,424 --> 00:20:12,257
So thank you, Phil,
467
00:20:12,259 --> 00:20:16,661
for reminding us there are
things worth fighting for.
468
00:20:16,663 --> 00:20:19,731
And for helping us to remember
the most important thing:
469
00:20:19,733 --> 00:20:22,467
Time is precious.
470
00:20:22,469 --> 00:20:25,737
And we shouldn't waste a moment of it.
471
00:20:31,411 --> 00:20:35,146
Rest in peace, buddy.
472
00:20:49,018 --> 00:20:50,695
Sneaky date.
473
00:20:50,696 --> 00:20:52,696
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
36534
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